Watch What Crappens - #2896 Next Gen NYC S1E3: Father Figure

Episode Date: June 18, 2025

For a moment we feel bad for Charlie on Next Gen NYC when he has to sit through an awkward and cringey lunch with Seth.  But whatever glimmers of goodwill we feel rapidly evaporate after he makes microaggressions towards Riley and doesn’t even feel bad about it.  You can watch this recap on video, listen to our Love Island bonus episodes, and participate in live episode threads at patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens.  Tickets for our final Seattle and LA tour dates on sale at watchwhatcrappens.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wondry Plus subscribers can listen to Watch Your Crappins ad free right now. Join Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts. Hello and welcome to Watch Watch Crap In. It's a podcast about all that crap on Brava. We just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me today is Ronnie Karam. Hi Ronnie, how's it going? Hello. What's going on witches?

Happy hump day. It's Wednesday, which means many things. But today, what it means is that tomorrow is the last day of the mounting hysteria tour. We are having our big finale at the Fonda theater in Hollywood, California. It's gonna be very exciting. We're going to be recapping the valley. Will we have a special guest? Who knows? Maybe we can't say, but it's going to be fun. And we hope you all are there.

So go get your tickets, go to watchacrapins.com and ticket links are there and join us. It's going to be fabulous. Thanks to everyone who has come out and seen us this year on our various cities and stops. We've had a blast getting back out on the road. It's our first North American tour in two years. And so it was so, so, so, so, so, so fun and, you know, happy to be doing it, closing it out in Hollywood tomorrow. So there's that then over on Patreon, we are chugging away with our love island coverage, which has been so fun.

The sh the season is wild and we're having a great time recapping it every day. So go check that out. Patreon.com slash watch for crap ins. Um, those, those recaps are up basically every day that we're doing recaps here. And also we have crap. It's on demand where you can watch us and not just listen to us. So there's a whole whole world of crap and out there on page around and we want you to participate in it and enjoy it. So that is that. And now today it is time to talk about next gen New York city. Oh my God. Wait, Ronnie. Oh, oh,

actually before we start that, there's some very big news. Ronnie, I don't know if you heard this. Tell me if you stopped me. If you heard this, um, Charlie like texting me and was like, Oh my God, like, um, want to go have some pizza tonight? Unless I'm already at home with your sister and we're like having sex. Can you believe it? Can you believe that Charlie did that? I cannot believe you. Oh, I thought you were talking about the actual news, which is that Charlie filed for bankruptcy in 2023,

when he only had $1,500 in his bank account, and then Dame Dash is broke too. He's $20 million in debt. He also had $20 million in IRS stuff, and his kid got evicted from her apartment. So while these fuckers, well, not Ava, she's done nothing wrong, but like while Charlie is acting like, oh, this TV,

you know, you guys are so used to being on TV. This reality kids are such trash. Mm hmm. Mm hmm. Yeah, no, Charlie's going these people are feeding your asses now. So let's get a little bit of respect to his Zolciak. And I've never said that before in my life. Respect to his Zolciak. But I've said it. Respect the Zolciak. Yeah, he is awful.

And now it's like he was already awful. And now he also, you can also add a unrepentant, is it too far to say racist, but I'm going to say micro aggressor. Either way, he is just, he's a dick and he's just getting worse and worse. And he's like unappealing. And now on top of that, you're broke too. So like you can't be all those things. Fucker.

Yeah. Fucker. So this was also the episode that I officially fell in love. I mean, I've loved the show since it started. I've really liked both of us. We've really liked it, but this is the one where I was like, oh no, this show's great. This is, this is the one that solidified it for me. I died laughing and then all of the other stuff

was really good. Riley's just handling herself so well. I love, I fucking love Riley. I never saw that coming. I mean, I didn't dislike Riley before, but they made it look like she has no lines. She's like the whole season. I'm loving the show.

I love this show. I can't believe how much I love this show. I'm upset. I wanna marry this show. I'm loving the show. I love this show. I can't believe I'm under. I love this. I'm upset. I want to marry this now. I'm going to marry it. So I can't, I'm not at, I'm not at love yet. And here's the reasons why I think we are spending too much time with the parents. I understand that the parents are like the hook for this show that these are the children of stars, but the truth is this show is at its best when it just focuses on the main cast. So the entire, this is like two weeks in a row where like the second half of the show has been significantly more compelling. Cause the second half is when the kids are all just hanging out and doing things.

And like, it actually bothered me a little bit that the show, you know, early on in the show we have this kind of like quick recap of this crazy night out that they all had. I'm like, I want to see that. Why are you making me sit through this awful scene of Seth trying out his like motivational speaker thing. Oh my God, I could not stand it. But it was also like, A, it was cringy. And I know that's the point,

but also it's like, it wasn't authentic. Like it was, this is, it was like stupid to me. I would much rather spend my screen time watching these kids talk with each other. Cause that to me is so entertaining and I think Bravo has to like it's like we get it. We understand they've got famous parents Let's just like start to like sunset them because there's just too much Seth on this episode Can we stop talking about like?

First of all that is senior abuse you're talking about sun setting people like a science fiction movie, like turning them into Soylent Green, no. And I will not stand for this slander. I like it, I loved the set scene. And to me it was very realistic because, that thing of like, I'm gonna talk to your friend. I mean, that's happened to me. And it's like the most awkward thing ever for the person whose dad or mom is doing it.

My mom went into school one time, was like, who's bullying you? And she went in and told off everybody in school, which is an adult. I'm like, what a badass. But as a kid, I was like, oh my god, you know, and she's still to this day, like, well, I went in there and I told those kids off. And I'm like, and you know, kind of ruined a lot at that age, you know. But I also like it because I was the kid who hated hanging out with the kids. So I was always hanging out with the

adults. So I'm still like that. I'm still like, wow, I get to hang out with the adults. So I was always hanging out with the adults. So I'm still like that. I'm still like, wow, I get to hang out with the adults. But then I get to see what all the kids were talking about, most likely behind my back, while I was watching their moms drink Franzie and talk shit about each other. So I don't know, it's all working for me. Yeah, I mean, look, I think the show is almost there.

I'm just saying I like the cast so much that I just wanna spend more time with them. And I would like to see their crazy night out. I want to see what happened when they went to this club and Georgia lost her phone. I would just rather spend more time with that than like Seth and Brooks golfing or Seth and Charlie having drinks or whatever, or Gia and Teresa talking about making pizza. Like those things were entertaining, but I didn't find them to be compelling. And so I just want more of our children

on the show, front and center, doing vapid things. And if there are adults, I want them to be dismissive adults. That's fair. You know what? Tomato, tomato. That's okay. You say you want more compelling, I say stop making this show so life-changing for me,

especially the scenes with Teresa, Seth, and Charlie's dad hating on Charlie. I love it. I do. Well, that's okay, because he's dismissive. Again, I'm okay with dismissive adults. Put in Kelly Catrone. Put in, I'm not gonna say Anna Wintour,

but I don't need Dame Dash. Anna Wintour, why wouldn't you say that? Does she even have children? Or are they snow? Are they snowman? Like, I would love. Are they icicles? I would love to meet her icicle children.

If she had a little mushrooms from Super Mario, they all have her haircut. I mean, OK, so speaking of icicle children, Ariana opens the show, of course, because they're still doing this whole like, oh my God, Azulciak in New York City, isn't this wacky? So that's how we open it. And Ariana's monologue is like, I'm in New York City.

I'm like a kid in a candy shop. I am honestly in awe of my life and the fact that God has blessed me to even be here. I don't even mind the smell of urine and poop. I mean, look, I was raised in the Beerman household with 15 other children pissing everywhere. Okay. I love the loudness. I'm used to sirens. I love how fast paced it is. Well, I love how she slide, slid that in. I'm used to sirens. My mom calls the police on Croy every other weekend. There's just so much culture and there's like so many different kinds of people. I get this feeling here that's like,

just gives me chills. I like walk down the streets. It's like how I imagine Alicia Keys singing Empire State of Mind would be, you know, loud, annoying, off key, screeching. Could you please have Alicia Keys shut up? I'm trying to do a play here. You walk down the street and there's a Broadway diva making microaggressions against Alicia Keys and an Audre O'Donnell like this is the life. Please be quiet I shouldn't have to deal with this. Oh my God. I just got pooped on.

Empire State of shut up. How's that going for you? So she's like, yeah, I mean like, oh my God, a bird pooped on me. Is bird poop supposed to be good luck? Cause that's incredibly concerning that bird poop is supposed to be good luck. I don't know if I like this city anymore.

I don't believe in these omens. I believe in Jesus. You know who made that bird poop? The Lord did. Whitney Port. I mean, Whitney, Whitney Rose, my favorite quote of hers. I think that is my favorite Whitney Rose quote of all time. You know who did that? The Laura did. So

sitting on a park bench, she's talking to Brooks on the phone. And he's like, Oh my God, Riley invited everyone out and took us around Brooklyn. And then Ariana and Hudson came, but you could tell Charlie wasn't interested. And they felt like disrespected by the way that he was telling them because he wasn't very nice. And it was like, oh, I'm not interested't interested and they felt like disrespected by the way

that he was telling them because he wasn't very nice. And it was like right after he told me that he wanted to be in a room with my sister, my sister. And he was like, so you won't be mad if I fuck your sister, your sister, your sister, the disrespect. Girl, it is episode three. Move it. Ah, like, Bruxy, I love you, but you need to move it along.

This is definitely a kid from the Meredith Mark School of, oh, I'm very talking about my bathtub. Yeah, he has really streaked this one out. And it's just not compelling enough. But it is, it's funny in its own way, just because he is so fixated on it, that every time he brings it up, just when you think it's just not compelling enough, but it is good. It's funny in its own way, just because he is so fixated on it that like every time he brings it up, just when you think it's over, he'll find someone else.

He'll find like a hot dog vendor, like he'll go up. We'll just see the mayoral race with like Como and the other guy. Like I would love, I have a question for the candidates. If Charlie ever texted you and said he wanted to sleep with your sister, how would you feel about it? I'll start with you, Como.

He's just going to find anyone to talk to about this. Yeah. So it was like, I literally feel like a PR girl. Because I hear things about what my client's done. Now I got to go do damage control. Control. I'm like, well, you know what? At least you're giving yourself a job in your meetup.

Yeah. I'm like, well, you know what? At least you're giving yourself a job and you're made up. You're like fake medical insurance after all, healthcare. She's like, I mean, I don't even know about Ariana because I've like, haven't met her. Like, I don't know her vibes or whatever. So then we see the flashbacks of Ariana being like, hi, nice to meet you. And Charlie being like, oh yeah, it's crazy how fast

you can get a read on someone. Oh, probably doesn't even know what crypto is. Ever heard of blockchain? Loser. So now we see Ariana Hudson walking down the street again and she is still doing her like, I'm constantly walking around the city with swamp ass and I should probably have just kept that to myself,

but God, I love this city. It's like Alicia Keys always sang. Well, but tomorrow we're gonna go to SoHo for George's event, and I'm excited for it. And we're gonna see your favorite person, Hudson. Hudson Charlie. Charlie's like, I'm not gonna condition my hair today.

I'm that anger split ends. These split ends were brought to you by Zachs Bees Chicken. Today my look is brought to you by Tears for Fears, circa 1984. So, Charlie, meanwhile I'll go back to Charlie. Now he's in the apartment with Ava and she's like, so I heard some tea about last night and I heard you were still making comments

about Chloe and stuff to Brooks. He's like, yeah, I was like doing a joking league. I mean, he doesn't really even care. No, he does care, but he's like not good at confrontation. So he's probably like laughing, but he feels uncomfortable. How many people does Brooks need to actually confront Charlie about this? Cause last episode was all about like, I don't want to have like a mouthpiece. And now it's been like the fifth person commissioned to do this.

Girl, it's more than a mouthpiece at this point. It's like a retainer. Like you never take it out of your mouth. It's constantly there. And unless you eat it. So, um, yeah, she's, he's basically, and I think, you know, I think it's, it's a little much too, because I think Charlie's just fucking with Brooks. I mean, Charlie's an asshole.

Look, I'm not going to stand up for, for Charlie, but Brooks knows that Charlie's I think Charlie's just fucking with Brooks. I mean, Charlie's an asshole, look. I'm not gonna stand up for Charlie, but Brooks knows that Charlie's an asshole and he's fucking with him. But I think Charlie's like, why are you trying to make this a fucking storyline, bruh? But then instead of just backing off, he just keeps making it worse, you know? So what can you do?

You know what, Charlie? I'm trying to stand up for you, because I know how difficult it is being a wealthy, white, blonde, young person in America. There's no opportunities for you. Nobody gives you any chances. So I'm trying to stand up for you, but you're making it very, very difficult, Charlie, okay, please let's feel something for the straight, white, young,

rich male in this country. It's hard to look like a scars guard without any of the perks of being a scars guard. So he does have, he does carry that cross. He's a SARS guard, you know? Sorry, sorry. Sorry, sorry. You know, SARS.

Yeah. So now Charlie and Dylan are talking and Charlie is like Hudson, like, so yeah, the other night we had this crazy, this drama. It's like Hudson comes up and Charlie is like, Hudson like, so yeah, the other night we had this crazy, this drama. It's like Hudson comes up and he's like, yo, I feel like there was some disrespect for some animosity towards us or something. And I was like, dude, you wanna fight?

Like, let's go fight. I can hire someone to fight you. And then we see a flashback of Hudson being like, you wanna fight? No. And Ava's like, wait, you want to take this around the corner? Who says that? Yeah. Like you want to take it. I love it. He's like, I'm so city he wants to fight? You want to take this around the corner? Who says that? Yeah.

Like you want to take it. I love it. He's like, I'm so city that I like offer to fight outside around the corner so we don't disturb any businesses. Well, guess what? There's more businesses around the corner. You fell into the corner trap. It's called a corner store.

So no matter where you fight, there's gonna be a business. So Ava's like- Botega fight, bro, Botega fight. So Ava's like, Bo-Tiger fight, bro, bo-tiger fight. It's on the corner, dun-dun-dun. Hey, I'll compromise with you and I'll do it on the corner. Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do. So Ava's like, I mean, you said you wanna fight? And he's like, yeah, but I was like,

around the corner, right? And then Ariana was like, by his side or some shit, I would have fought him for sure. And Dylan's like, Yeah, you guys want some weed to like, we're cameramen. We can't smoke your weed. Sorry. Okay, yeah. But like, guys, guys usually like if they fight, like that's when they become best friends. Because like, one time I got in this fight, and I like wailed on this dude. And he was like, bro, I can't wait to jerk off to you on fucking only fans. I was like fuck

Yeah, I get 15 months 15 bucks a month from that fucking dude fucking awesome said dudes are bro Yeah, man, that's how bros become friends we just punch each other a little bit with the fists and with the dicks so then Dylan is like, yeah, it was awesome. So the producer is like, what about your face? Like don't you make money off your face? He's like, no, I don't make money off this thing. It's my body. We see more shots of him shirtless.

No, it's your face. Anybody can work out. You've got the double punch, you know, you've got the face and the working out. So you're making money off your face. Don't mess up your face. And I don't even believe him that he beat the shit out of some guy and had blood all over his hands. Dylan, nobody believes you. Hmm. Well, we now go to a driving range where Seth and Brooks are playing golf and Seth is like, get in the hole. Get it hole. Oh my God, my dad would always be taking me golfing

growing up and like that was like one side of it. The other side was that he would send me to like golf intensives and golf intensives. I mean, it's called golf lessons. Is that what you're talking about? Is what Gen Z golf lessons, intensives? Yeah, like intensives. Like you took me to golf camp and he's like,

you call golf camp a golf intensive? Like what the hell, Brooks? So you getting any up the ass? Let's talk about it. So you swallow, let's talk about your sex life. You have a boyfriend, he played golf, he fuck you up the butt. Hey, you ever done nosies?

That's where you fuck someone's nose. You ever done it? I read about it. I saw it on TikTok. I read about it on TikTok. It was a TikTok, but it had words on it. Do kids do that? God, I'm so glad to get kids back to reading.

So let's get back to, you know, you like that? It's like, dad, gone. I actually, I had to go these awful intensives because they were intense and I actually won an award. It was a unique award that they created just for me because I accidentally hit a squirrel with my golf ball which honestly that shouldn't have even been an award. I need to unpack that in therapy. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappin's commercial.

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decades and witnesses were finally speaking out. The spotlight is harsher the stakes are higher and for did he there may be no second chances. You can listen to the rise and fall of did the federal trial exclusively with wondering plus join wondering plus in the wonder yet Spotify or Apple podcast right now. So then we see the boyfriend who's really cute. So Brooks has a boyfriend now and they're cleaning the apartment.

And Brooks is like, I'm going to clean this thing. He's like standing on the counter. Brooks is also wearing like a shirt made of like seatbelts. I'm a fashion designer. I don't know if he's a sewing machine, but I know fashion. Yeah. So Seth's like, yeah, you know, Cade and I met in Park City. I was out with my mom, or, oh no, this is Brooks.

He's like, Cade and I met in Park City. I was with my mom and he was like, oh my God, icon queen. And so like we're basically together now. Yeah. He buys me dinner, but I have to sign the check. Meredith Marks put hearts on it. It's the customer copy. He takes it home and just pretended my mom signed it. I'm like, it's his kink.

Yeah, he lives between like Austin and LA. So I'm like always trying to get him to come to New York, which is hard because when he's not in those cities, he's in Salt Lake City, just like following my mother around and being like, icon, mother, mother icon. So anyway, sometimes he comes to New York City and he like vacuums my silverware for me. Yeah, last time he came to visit, he got a hotel room and then at the front desk, they said, um, are you Mr. Basically Meredith Marx's son now?

Okay, we've got your room ready for you. It was romantic. said, are you Mr. Basically Meredith Marx's son now? Okay, we've got your room ready for you. It was romantic. How's your sex life? That's like not something I need to talk to my dad about. He's like, but you do talk about your mom about it? Yeah, because she's an icon. I want a deeper emotional connection.

Seriously, I want to be like a mother. That's the next level for a father is to be the mother. The dad becomes the mom, son. That's how it goes. Okay, tell me, what about your body count? Is that high? You got a high body count? What about your boyfriend? He got a high body count. He's like, where did you hear body count? He's like, yeah, I just learned it. It was TikTok. You know what? I just want to make sure you know before you give your heart completely, it's mutual. Are you just a body count on a counter of bodies? Come on.

You fuck the bodies. All right. It's body count. How much anal does that take? Damn, stop. Do you swallow a load and that's on your body? Is a hand the body count? Tell me.

I need to know. What sort of hair does he have? Because I've been told by someone in my wife's circle that you can have hair that indicates your body count. He's like, well, speaking of body count, Chloe went on a date with Charlie and Charlie said this thing about Chloe. He's like, Oh, Jesus, I haven't even been here. And I've heard about this. What is Chloe's body count? Dad, that's not the point. Does she like anal? Dad!

But he texted me after, I don't know what he said, like, come meet, like, let's meet up unless I'm at my place with your sister. He's like, wow, wow, she needs to know who she's signing up for with a guy who behaves like this. And he's like, well, is that how you behave? He's like, at that age? Like a little 16 year old?

Yeah, I mean, cause it was entertaining. I used to be like that, but he's 29. Okay, maybe not that age. And he's like, yeah, you were married with three kids, dad. He goes, yeah, but I'm always going to be immature. That's the point, son. Those are immature moments. I relate to that.

God, I love this kid. God, I'm going to see. I love this kid. God, let's see if he's got some extra dad, need a dad needs a dad, right? I bet he'll talk about it. You know, I'm taking this kid to lunch. Yeah. He's probably hasn't swallowed loads, right? All right. I won't bring that up. Body count lunch with Charlie. God, I can't wait. I'm going to bring him a cake with Whitney Rose's boobs on and see what he does. Let's see if he's truly like me. I think I know how it's going to turn out. He's like, I can handle it. I'm going to bring him a cake with Whitney Rose's boobs on it and see what he does. Let's see if he's truly like me. I think I know how it's going to turn out. He's like, Dad, I can handle it.

I'm 24. You don't need to go talk to people. Can you? Because it's episode three. I mean, I think in your time, it's like the third week you're talking. It's been a month of talking. Your dad needs to step in. I'm for it.

Yeah. And basically, Seth decides that he's going to, he's like, wow, it seems like Charlie doesn't have a deep relationship with his dad. So I'll be his dad now, which I think is actually a bit like, for some shows to do that even to someone like Charlie. So now we go over to New Jersey and Gia's like, hi mom, how are you doing? She's like, I went to go get my Chuck-A-Lena laser and I got like a Brazilian down there, but they didn't numb my butthole.

And I was like, ow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow. And she was like, next time we'll numb your butthole. Okay. I was like, okay. I never did but bleached my butthole before. I never did my butthole before, but I had a Brazilian do my butthole. Let me get no sense. Oh my God, mom.

Like I'm for sure moving out, but like it's so difficult cause like New Jersey has like a turnpike and then you go like into the turnpike and it could be flooded with water any sec. I could do there. I love living here though. Cause you know, we got a pizza oven. We got like a floor. We got like mops.

It's like, it's like perfect here. She, she goes also there's no taxes in New Jersey. And then let me see it on screen. It says, no, this US, Jersey has the second highest average property taxes. You guys just don't pay your taxes. There are in fact taxes in New Jersey. Some of us need to stop listening to our parents

because that is such a Joe, Jude icing to say. Yeah, no taxes here. There's no taxes in Jersey. Do they have no sales tax? What is she talking about? Maybe she meant taxis. I don't know. She's like, so this weekend- We don't got waxes in Jersey.

That's why my dad's gotta get shaved every day by Melania. So this weekend, I'm gonna have everyone over for a pool party, which is just what cool kids from New York City wanna do, go to Jersey for a pool party when they can go to Soho House instead. Whoa. Oh yeah, I'm so upset I'm not gonna be there for it. I know, but I'm gonna make pizzas with everyone,

so you know, I'm gonna get the dough from Pizza Cucina. Oh my God, did you numb pizza? Cucina first? I never did that before no ma not your Ma you're getting confused you getting confused ma. Oh, sorry. I met my Chuck-A-Lita. Have you been to Chuck-A-Lita pizza? Cucina yet, though? Okay, everybody who's wondering all the Jersey people out there in the turnpike slamming on their steering wheels, here's the law. You're right. New Jersey has some specific tax policies related to clothing and groceries, but it's

not entirely accurate to say there's no tax in Jersey. Jersey does have a sales tax currently at 6.625% on most tangible personal property and certain services. However, there are exemptions for several categories, most clothing and footwear, most food sold as groceries, prescription medications, and certain other items including Chocolina waxing, agricultural supplies, and coochie waxing, which is different than Chocolina waxing. So is different than chocolina waxing. So there you go. Yeah, we all learned something now.

So she, Gia's gonna make pizza. She's gonna have a sidekick that's gonna come. And like, Teresa is like, oh yeah, by the way, no one on the trampoline. Like, why do you have a trampoline then? The trampoline is made for these parties. It's made for pool parties. I love it, it's like trampolines for adults only. So

Yeah, it's there and she's like by the way that cameras outside so I'm gonna be watching you So yeah big party about to come So now we see Charlie walking down the street and Gia him about the pool party and he's like cool dope whatever, you know He's absolutely disgusted with the idea of going to New Jersey to like Gia's pool party he's like, I guess I gotta do it for the show, but He doesn't want to hang out with Jersey girls Okay. So now we get Charlie going to Casa Bond with his mom Liz and the mom's boyfriend Ivar.

Oh my God, these two. So Charlie sits down with these crazy people and he's like, wow, I haven't seen you since like Mother's Day, I guess. And Ivar's like, do you guys in America take Mother's Day seriously though, do you? Ugh, disgusting. We don't celebrate Mother's where I'm from. Across the pond we say, oh, there's a pond,

I'll drown you in it. You insufferable wench who birthed me. That's the pond we say, there's a pond, I'll drown you in it. You insufferable wench you birthed me. That's just how we do it there. She goes, well, you know, it just happened to be that I last saw, last saw my mother's day because I just happened to be in town. And so I said, oh, it's mother's day. Let's have lunch. I thought, you know, I almost forgot that I had this son and I thought, well, I guess I might as well do something motherly once in a while. So I threw him a bow. And I was like, come on, Peter, let's go to lunch.

He said, my name's Charlie. I said, well, whatever your name is. I gotta do this once every five years. Am I right? God, you went out with a whole family. Oh, whoever just happens to be around sounds disgusting. He's such a ghoul, this Ivar. So what a weird fucking dude.

And she's like, well, I mean, everybody's still speaking ghoul this Ivar. So what a weird fucking dude. And she's like, well, I mean, everybody's still speaking to me as of now. So those are the people that got to come. And Charlie tells us his sad, sad story. His parents got divorced when he was three ish. He grew up with his mom till he was 10. But then his mom was like, gross, I'm artsy. So she got rid of me. You know, she gave me home cooked meals stuff, but then she just got sick of me. So my dad took custody because she wasn't really feeling up to it.

You know, the first time I sold all my jelly beans and bought crypto with it, she said to your rat, fucking brat. And you know, it got more factored when I needed her assistance with my dad. And I was like, dad's mean, then she didn't do shit about it. And that's when I knew, mama doesn't care.

Pity the child that lost his mama. Yeah, you're still an asshole, Charlie. I feel nothing. I'm gonna translate Charlie's story, which is she tried to raise Charlie. He was out of control, spoiled brat. Like, just couldn't- Kept getting kicked out of boarding school and shit.

Kicked out of boarding school, private school, private school, private school. She couldn't deal with it anymore. So she's like, guess what? You now have to live with your dad because he's more stern than I am. So then he was raised by his dad and he's still a little shit. And then anytime he was trying to get his way, he would make his pitch to the mom and sell it in one way. And then he would go tell the dad like this mom said it's okay. And then dad would call mom and she'd be like, I never said that, that little fucking shit. And dad's like, you're busted. That's what this story is, okay.

I don't believe any of his spin whatsoever. I don't either. And Charlie's like, it was abuse, man. It was abuse, it was child abuse. So don't believe him. And he's like, yeah, I mean, like you mom, like you don't alienate us the way dad does. She goes, no, it's not alienation.

You know, it's a center voicemail is what I call it. It's always worked for me as a mother. You know, she's like, you know, it's so nice because, you know, we we used to go out years ago and now we're all back together. So I can see how the drugs are affecting your body now. All these years later. She's talking about Ivar. So I was like, Oh, yes, we've been story. So we met 40 years ago in Dallas, of all places. She's

like, Yeah, I was dating Jean-Michel Basquiat. Remember that? He's like, Why did your accent turn French? Because his name was Jean-Michael Basquiat. Come on, come on. Charlie, do you want them back? You know, every time Ivar shows up at a cafe with an ass cut on and tries to pretend like he's an artist, I just like to remind him that my ex was Basquiat. My best friend was Debbie Harry.

So good try, Ivar. And Ivar is like, yeah, well, your mom went out with my best friend, but he was too boring and she left him, even though he had a huge cock. Yeah. Charlie's like, how do you know how big his cock is? Ivar, how are you not playing with your nipples, why are you talking?

He's like, teeth him out and like licking his lips. It's creepy, this guy. I know, Charlie's like, um, Ivar, how did you know how big your best friend's cock was? He goes, well, there's always a hint of mint about us Englishmen, so I knew. Could you take one now? I'm not even around you and I know you need one.

A hint of mint. So Charlie's like, my mom fucked up in early youth, but she's been such a good mom. She's tried so hard to make up for it. Unlike my dad who continues to be a dick and open up old wounds. And then we see a flashback to basically the dad saying like his sister was his favorite. I don't know.

I think his dad's just a realist. I mean, it's just amazing. I remember you were just so intuitive as a child. And it's funny because Basquiat's not your father, but your life has grown up to resemble one of his paintings. And that's always really touched me, Charlie. You know, you're just so amazing, intuitive as a child. Always, when I didn't want to speak to you,

you would walk away. And it was just glorious. You know, I remember one day I was sick and I said to you, Charlie, you're going to have to make a peanut butter sandwich. And he said, I'll make you one, mummy. I love you. You brought me a bottle of vodka and a straw,

a little mirror with a razor on it. That was the only mother's day I'll ever need. Thank you." And just like that Basquiat, unlike that Basquiat for painting that you look like, you have no inherent worth. Anyway, great seeing you again, love. So, she's basically the best memory of Charlie is that he made her a sandwich one time when

she didn't go and making dinner. She's like your acts of service, Charlie. Really quite amazing. Whenever someone says, describe your child, I say he would always press the button on the elevator. What a good thing. Unfortunately, it was a terrible sandwich. So that was the moment I realized I had to give you over to your father. So she's like, so are you happy with where you are right now? That's a rhetorical question.

You obviously are miserable because we failed you as parents. And he's like, well, I'm at my point in my life where like I'm 29, right? Like turning 30 soon enough. And it just would be nice if like, how's maybe a little bit further along and like a career path.

Oh, well, to be further along, you have to start on one. So there's that, how about that? Yeah, you might wanna start, you know? And he's like, dad's an asshole. He doesn't give me emotional support. Like, what the hell, I don't get emotional support from Anwar. And she's like, well, Anwar didn't get emotional support

because there was Gigi and then there was the other one and Anwar's the other other one. How do you think he feels? I'm not talking about the Hadid's mom, I'm talking about dad. Oh, right, father. No, it's not that he doesn't support you. He just doesn't like you, Charlie. All right. And in fairness to him, his skill set that he uses in business makes us all rich. So let's be grateful for dad. All right. you can hire somebody to hug you, Charlie." I was like, I can do it. Hint of mint. Oh wait, I want to show you something, Charlie. Before you start talking about career paths, I want to remind you that you can just be a lazy artist who coasts off his parents' money.

Look, some pictures that you drew. I saved them. Look at these. And he's like, oh yeah, I do remember them. And so you think for a moment, it'll be like, wow, imagine Charlie has like a hidden talent. Like he actually has raw artistry that he got from his mom who worked in the world of artistry. And we see the painting, the pictures, it's just like doodles of like stick figures shooting each other. Absolutely brilliant. So good. He goes, wow. Oh my God, I do remember this. Is this dad that I'm drawing getting killed? Bullet through the head, knife through the head. That's funny as fuck.

Wow. Yes. We call these basky knots. When I tell you, I died laughing at this. Like where else are you going to get this? I brought pictures you drew of your father. Oh yeah, somewhere I stabbed him in the head. That's one where I shot him five times.

God, these are good. God, what a family. And then he says, Hey, you know what? You know what I'm rewatching right now? Succession. And I was like, Oh, isn't it wonderful? hint of mint.com. And Charlie was like, yeah, I mean, if that guy isn't literally an war incarnate, I mean, my dad is the dad from that show. Just how badly like one of the songs wants his approval and how little he gives a fuck. I'm like, Charlie, I hate to break it to you. The dad is the hero on that show. It's the children who are the villains.

No, I know. You know, no one roots for the kids on that show, right? I hope you really pay attention to the part where the dad comes in and says, I love you all, but you're not serious people. You're just not serious people. See, the only part you need to see, Charlie. I hope you pay attention to the part

where the children are insufferable for four seasons in a row. And no one likes them and cheers for their demise. One of the only shows where everybody's like dying to know how it ends and actually hoping everybody gets killed. Charlie is actually casting himself in the role of like Jeremy Strong. Like, what an honor to be the Jeremy Strong character. The only person.

He's like, yeah, you know, like, like the kids, there's that one kid who just wants him to love him, but then he just rips him down. He's like, I don't want to shit talk that too much. Cause like, God forbid I get cut off on this heirs, but he's really a vicious motherfucker sometimes. Yeah. And guess what? You're broke now.

So yes, exactly. It looks like someone got cut off. So now we go over to Brooks's apartment and shy comes over. So finally we're getting to spend time with Shai, who's in the poster, in the front row of the poster. Shai is like, so I got introduced to the rest of the group through Dylan and I have a full-time job. I'm an agent's assistant.

And I spend most of my free time sewing. So you know, my mom dropped me off some currency the other day and then I put them up and then I was like, no. And I took them down and it made them into pants. And I'm wearing the pants right now. And he gets up and he shows us the pants. Babe, those are $10 IKEA sheer curtains. They were like still obviously $10 IKEA shirt.

I mean, congratulations on being able to sew, but I don't know, better eye, better eye. I did something similar. I really like him. I turned, there was a fitted sheet that I was gonna throw out, and instead, I turned that into a pair of shorts. And I was like, oh my God, this is so cool.

I turned the fitted sheet into shorts. And when I tell you, they are basically see-through. There's a difference between sheet material and clothing material. Yeah, yeah, that's the way I'm purpose. Doesn't work out. So he's having to show Brooks how to sew, because Brooks still doesn't work out. It doesn't work out. So, um, he's having to show Brooks how to sew because Brooks still doesn't really know. He's like, I got a new machine, but I like, it's like a thing and like you put a thing

on a whatever. Could you do it? He's like, okay, yeah, I'll show you. You just put this on the bottom and then thread the thing through. He's like, wow. Yeah. I'm like really like, I'm going gonna like learn because like I'm a fashion designer and I want to be more than just like a one track suit wonder and then we see Jen Shaw being like

um is that it is there like any other designs is that the only design what about me um says the lady who now is in just a one track suit rotation no kidding my karma came quickly I wouldn't fucking crux man that karma came quickly. I wouldn't fucking, Brooks, man, that karma comes quickly. I never thought about that. Now she's a one track suit wonder. That's cool. I also think it's hilarious that Brooks is on like year four or five of his fashion designer journey

and he's only like sitting down with his first ever sewing machine. He's like, okay, what do I do? It's like, it's like at least like, at least do this off camera, at least learn about it, how a sewing machine works off camera. Yeah, it should have taken a few weeks before the show started shooting and like come up with some stuff

and had them there to be like, look, I'm a designer, I've been doing this since my tracksuit, you know? Yeah. Like, how do you put a thread in the needle? I mean, he literally asked how to thread a needle. Shia's like, why am I better at this than you? I'm not supposed, this is not my role on the show. So then now Riley shows up.

And Shia's saying like, Riley is by far the most genuine. And they love each other. So then Shia is showing how to use the sewing machine and he's like, okay, you just take the fabric and you move it forward like this. Ow, it just got me. And then he's like, just kidding. And Brooks is like, oh my God, like I literally almost died.

I thought you were serious. I thought you died. I thought like you died of sewing machine. That was so scary. I literally almost fell over in horror. It was like the time Charlie texted me and said, so he's like, so are you still on your own phone bill? Are you on your parents?

And he's like, no, I'm on my parents right now. They were going to switch me out, but then they saw I was still making pants out of drapes and I wasn't ready. So it's actually a good, it's actually a good move on my part. He's like, yeah, same. Like second I have my own phone bell,

I'm going to be like, that's adulting. Get a needle, get a thread through a needle, Brooks. I know. Get to work, Cinderella. Commercials, here comes one right now. So Shy's like, yeah, I'm trying to get off my phone more because like, if we don't have phones, we don't have a phone bill.

Oh my God, that's like amazing. Right, I was like, well. Yeah, that's like crazy. I was thinking like, if I don't buy food, then I won't eat it. So I just stopped buying food. Brooks, why are you eating the sewing machine? We should have talked about food.

Ow! The needle hurt, but it's worth it. So Riley's like, okay, I came over here to shoot a scene with you guys, not watching Marvel about phone bills. So guess what? Georgia lost her phone. Last night, she was saying she was going crazy without it,

and she was so stressed. And when we went out, she couldn't communicate with anyone. And Brooke's like, wow, did I really miss that much when I went home? And she's like, yeah, it was crazy. Wow. OK, everyone, America, buckle up. Here comes the story. We went to an art gallery event that Georgia produced.

Yeah, so we see a flashback and George is like, yeah. So when I'm looking at our I just kind of like, I feel like nothing sometimes, you know what I mean? That's like what art does to you. Yeah, I like invited people who I thought would be really interested in this event. So naturally there was a Zolciak there. And then we see the event and George said,

where the fuck are Dylan and Charlie? So then George says, I really like Ariana and Hudson. So then I was like, okay. And then, you know, I have Charlie, who's like my friend. So he just sent me this like, no, I don't like them. And he expects like unwavering loyalty all the time. Yeah. And Ariana wants to squash the beef with Charlie. You know, she's like, I hope this guy can keep

his smaltic energy in his pants and calm down so we can just be friends. So then we see the after party and she tells Charlie like, let's backtrack. And he's like, sure, I'd be welcome to that. And you know, welcome to New York, let's start over. So, um. They just basically just wrap up

that entire storyline for us. I was like, excuse you, like we're here, I was invested in this rivalry. How could you just like end it in a flashback? Cause we've got something new now. So now we go to Georgia dancing at the after party. You just like, you know, dancing like artists do, like our hands are in the air.

It's like, what? Like I might as well be looking at art right now. I'm thinking nothing. And then, done, done, done. I left around 11. I don't really go to clubs, period. Cause I'd rather like sit on my bed on my iPad, like drawing needles, trying to figure out

how to put that string through them. And so Charlie is giving Ariana and Hudson a group hug after they leave. And then Riley's like, wait, so Charlie and Dylan met up with some girls, which Georgia got really upset about, but Georgia was really under the influence, cut to Georgia just being like, well, where's Charlie?

Is Charlie even here? Is Charlie in that frame on the wall? What's Charlie? Is Charlie even here? Is Charlie in that frame on the wall? What's happening? And then Shy left early and then like Charlie ditched me with Georgia who still doesn't even have her phone. And then we see Charlie getting in this car and he's like, wait, why isn't Riley calling me? And then George is like, what the fuck?

They just like fucking left me at this party. How could I do this? This was supposed to be the best party of my life. This was like a marshmallow activation at the Haribo store. A premier DJ, premier candy. I can't believe they'd leave. So that's the drama. George is mad now because she got left at a party.

So now we see Charlie walking down the street carrying a skateboard. He's like, yeah, I'm a skateboarder. So I'm basically almost a 30 year old skateboarder. So surely dad will love me soon. I'm a real rebel. Like you're literally doing Bart Simpson to get your dad's love.

Girl. Yeah. So Seth FaceTimes him. He's like, Charlie, what's up, brother? I wanted to reach out to see if you and I could get together. Or as the kids say, hang, I hear things about you that concern me hashtag body count And I want to make sure you know there's a grown-ass man that cares about you

So that way you don't have to crash out be so for real right now Charlie's like Okay, I guess we can get together. All right. You got it. Stay strong brother. Okay. Thanks. Talk to you. Bye You gotta stay strong, brother. Okay, thanks, talk to you, bye bye. Wait, do you guys say bye in a different way? Please tell me, I don't wanna embarrass myself. Catch you later, alligator motherfucker in a trucker. That's right, that's you. See you soon, buddy.

He's like, awkward. How do you find us? So then we go to Seth and Charlie. Okay, so they have a lunch, and Seth's like, wow, you're taller than I thought you'd be, huh? Yeah, I'm real excited to. The Charlie chat, here we go. They're a chocolate factory near.

Charlie, Charlie, Charlie, whatcha think? Just kidding. All right, let's get some iced tea or Coke. Should we do some Coke? You got Coke? A cola, I mean, he's a kid. Are you a kid? You got Coke? You order what you want. I'll go along with it. I'm a cool dad. Cool dad. Yeah. All right. Then just so you can feel comfortable with this whole scene we're

shooting, I have three kids. He's like, I know. And I've always wanted to be like a life coach. So I thought I want you to be one of my first non-genetic clients on TV. This will go great. Because Seth was doing this. Remember after their first season, he's like, hey everybody, I'm a life coach. And here's what you just gotta do is follow my Instagram. I'll give you life coaching skills. All right, these are Ziploc bags.

Let me tell you something. You don't want something to get wet. What do you do? Put it in your pocket? What are you fucking an idiot? No, you put it in a Ziploc bag. Make sure you grab it with two fingers and it zip locks. You get it?

That's why they call it that. I never really got that until I actually concentrated on what it meant. Follow me, like and subscribe for more good tips like this. Also, you know, give your wife a present every once in a while. Talk to you soon. Charlie's like, what I would rather be doing

than having this meeting with Seth. I don't know, cutting my own dick off, sleeping, vomiting at my house, fucking Chloe, literally everything. And honestly, this is one of the few times I think I'm going to be on Charlie's side. So Seth is like, he's an asshole, but he makes me laugh at least. I was talking to you about before to you and Chloe even hung out. I was talking to you. You know, I see myself in you, man. Like, you know, out I was talking to you you know I see myself

in you man like you know so I know how dudes think I get it I get it bro okay and the pride and joy of my life my daughter okay you have a connection going she's got low body count you've got high body count let's not find an average. Okay, and whether it's gonna be a body count transaction or something deeper or more meaningful I don't know be so for real right now. Did I use that one already? You guys coupled up you closed off like what's going on with you two, huh? Come on Yes, you give her fanny flutters. Great. Just tell Just tell me where we're going here, brother man, bro ham. And he's like, I've been on one date with her, but I will say the level of familial involvement

is a little more intense than I'm used to. And my mom's boyfriend just talked about her ex-boyfriend's huge dick. So, just maybe reel it in a little bit. We are so back right now. I mean, you're right. And I, you know, I have to say, it just sounded like you were objectifying Chloe a little bit, which is really my role, not your role. It's like, well,

it wasn't anything crazy. I assure you. Well, you, you didn't say I'd love the opportunity to share sexual energy with your sister. You didn't say that because if you did not like to not like that one, definitely did not use that wording. It's nothing. I mean, like waking up together. I mean, come on, that was it. And he's like, oh, so was the F word even involved in it?

And he's like, no, I would never call Brooks that. No, no, the body count one. Oh, I don't know. Did I say that? Maybe I did. You know what? Maybe I did. I don't know.

Maybe. It's like, yeah, sounds like you're objectifying women, Charlie. Okay. You know, to me, it's a bunch of noise. It sounds like something I might have said. You know, did you get a boner this morning? Did you play with it? What kind of porn did you watch?

Huh? Was it like little people being tossed in bars? Just tell me the truth. I'm not getting a boner right now. Why are you staring at my boner? It's a tent. It's a tent in my pants. Oh my God.

Can we get a glass of water for this horny little goat? Hey, do you have a bathroom we can go into? Just to compare sizes, you know? Just wanna make sure we're really as similar as I think. I just really don't want you objectifying women unless it's in cake form and there's some boobs rising out of it, in which case you can lick those, that's okay.

Anywho, Brooks, tell me about what's going on with you and Brooks. He's like, well, Brooks and I have spoken about this and I've apologized at least like three times now and like, you know, over text. He's like, okay, well, I'm gonna tell him, dude, I love Charlie, he's very remorseful about it, let's move the fuck on, great teaching moment for them, okay, that's what we got, that's what we gotta say, right?

Because the most important thing in relationships is authenticity. Sometimes you got to cherish that relationship. You put it in the Ziploc bag and then you close it. Because did you see my video about how those clothes zip and lock? Okay, the zip and zipper lock is for locks. Hold on a second. News coming in, news coming in, your relationship is choking. Your relationship, okay, do not put human relationships in a Ziploc bag, okay? Life coaching lesson update. All right, don't do it.

Kids die like this. This is how kids die. Do you know how many kids have been found in uptown Manhattan with Ziploc bags over their head dead? It's a crazy thing. That's why they need me, Charlie. Listen, I think you're a good guy. You got a boner, I got a boner. You went to Cornell, I got a crazy thing. That's why they need me, Charlie. Listen, I think you're a good guy. You got a boner, I got a boner.

You went to Cornell, I got a boner. Tell me about Cornell. What was that like? He's like, I actually went to Emory and then NYU. Oh, so no, no Ivy League. Okay, why am I trying to save this relationship? Damn it, I thought for sure there was Cornell in there. Okay, well great seeing you.

He's like, yeah, and then I got a master's from NYU, you know, talent, restaurant marketing, shit like that, you know, stuff you don't really need in real life. He's like, Yeah, I'm so proud of you. God, I'm so proud. Does your dad ever say I'm proud of you? Does he ever ask you to sit right on his lap and whisper in your ear? I'm proud of you, son, not in a gay way. Your dad said I said that as this, I said that. Is this inappropriate? Why am I on your lap?

Who's the dad here? God. Well my dad did say, wow I'm so proud that you got a master's at NYU for something that anyone can just do on Canva, which is make a flyer for a restaurant. And then he said, you realize I was being sarcastic, right? So I don't know, technically he said he sarcastic, right? So I don't know.

Technically he said he was proud of me, but I don't know if totally he was proud of me. I don't know if our conversations were so explicit like that. I love that wording. And Charlie's like, yeah, Seth and my dad couldn't be more different. I mean, just in the way he gives me like life advice, like my dad would fucking laugh at that, you know? It's like this guy is so fucking full of horse shit.

It's fair. So then Seth was like, hey, you know what? You don't get to pick your parents, but you do get to pick your masters at NYU. God, I'm so proud of you. Wow, restaurant marketing. Look at, and look at what you're doing with that. You are doing something with that.

Are you doing something with it? Was it real? Is this a real master's? Is this just something you told your mom? Anyway, remove your expectations completely for both of them. You are doing something with that. Are you doing something with it? Was it real? Is this a real master's? Is this just something you told your mom? Anyway, remove your expectations completely for both of them. And now it's time to go rip and become Charlie fucking, you know, I actually don't know your last name.

Sorry, this, uh, this motivational speaking thing is really new to me. Charlie chocolate factory. That's what I'm going to call you, kid. All right. Charlie and the Boner factory. I'm all right. You and me. So, Hey, you got heartburn.

Why are you coughing like that? He's like, uh, got a hangover. He's like, Oh yeah. What time did Am I right? You and me. So, hey, you got heartburn? Why are you coughing like that? He's like, uh, got a hangover. He's like, oh yeah, what time did you get home? I remember that. I got home, got three, four, five, six in the morning. Girls with me, guys with me, who knows? Who knows even what's with me?

Are you Pam? What's the Pam thing? You guys hang out with the Pams person? What's that about? You like cooking? What's that? You fuck everybody? Is it bisexual?

Who's the sickest dick in? What's his body count? You got a roommate? What's that? Fuck everybody. He's a bisexual. Who's he stick his dick in? What's his body count? You got a roommate. What's his deal? How what's his body count? Okay. And Charlie's like, yeah, he's like bisexual, you know? Oh, so that's like fluid. So that's fluid. Does he have to go to the, he has to go to like pet boys or something,

get that fluid replaced. I'm just kidding. Just kidding. Just like want to break the ice. And it's very serious. Hey, I'm just, I'm just a bro. You know, I'm proud of you. I'm proud of you for getting your fluids changed. Good for you. He's like, it's called pansexual, I guess, like break the ice. And it's very serious. Hey, I'm just a bro. You know, I'm proud of you. I'm proud of you for getting your fluids changed. Good for you.

He's like, it's called pansexual, I guess, like pans or something. And he goes, oh yeah, pansexual. That's what I'm trying to get to. Don't tell my wife. Huh, it's a good one, right? Probably he's like, uh-huh, fair. I went to William Sonoma.

I went to William Sonoma. I was like, you got any pans in here? See what I, cause it's pans. I came. I came. I came anyway. They didn't like it. They, cause it's pans. I came. I came. I came anyway. They didn't like that though. I'm not allowed to go back there.

Pan shot on the target from now on. I turned that Le Creuset into some Le Crustet, if you know what I'm saying. Whenever Charlie wants out of a conversation, he just goes, fair, fair. I think I may do the same thing, fair. So now we cut to Georgia, Brooks and Chloe getting on a party bus. And Georgia's like, this is the SS Georgia.

So they're all gathering for this. And Georgia is, Georgia asks Chloe if she's seen Charlie since the date. And she's like, no, you haven't? Like, would you go again? And she's like, well, he hasn't asked me. And Brooks is like, yeah, please do it and disrespect my sister again.

Hey, bus driver, did you hear this? So Charlie texted me, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot. He's like, yeah, my dad met with Charlie. I guess I should have a dad that's willing to do that. Like, right now it's feeling like a big negative, but also my finger really hurts. Needles are hard. So then Ariana, everybody starts coming,

but Ariana brings laundry because Gia told her to just bring her laundry. And it's like so expensive at the hotel. Yeah, she's smart. Bring that laundry. She also brought two giant dogs onto this party bus. So then now we're in Jersey and Gia's like, I really do enjoy hosting parties. Like the setting up for it is honestly fine.

And then she's just setting up and there's dog shit everywhere. And everyone, meanwhile, on the party bus, the real drama of the episode starts. So Georgia's like, guys, should we play a game? And Raleigh's like, well, we could do something like whisper a question into Shy's ear and then be like, who's the weirdest person here? Okay, cool, let's play it.

Okay, so Shy's like, okay, who's the most likely to ditch you at a club? Which is a messy question, because we know where this is going. And George is like, two points to Charlie, like totally ditched me in a club just the other day. He's like, I didn't ditch you. We were busy. We were busy hooking up. We met girls. And Riley's like, Yeah, but I told Georgia I was like, it would

have been fine if you came up and like, we like, hey, we're about to go with these girls. But like you didn't even tell us. He's like, um, yeah, Dylan, I told Dylan to tell you. So we basically did say bye. She was like, Dylan did not tell us. And he goes, yeah, but then you got mad at that girl. And she's like, no, I wasn't. And he goes, yeah, it's on camera, Riley. So she's like, no, I didn't.

And he goes, yeah, Dylan and I are talking to these girls. And Riley goes up and she's like, yo, you think it's cool just to be here with Charlie and not come up and make sure it's not cool with me? Like you did this whole like thing. She's, he's like waving his finger and rolling his head. Oh, hell no.

My couch back up. I backed my couch up all the way into the wall. And I was already feeling a little like my eyebrow was already raised from earlier in the season when they were saying Riley can be like really scary. Sometimes she's like scary. I was like, this feels like little microaggression in it personally.

So Riley's like, I didn't do that. Yeah, because George did that too with him earlier in the season. And when that happened, I was like, is this like a generational thing where they're just like, that's fine for them? Like I didn't, I honestly had a moment where I was like, is it like, are we more sensitive to that kind of thing

in older generations? Cause it didn't even seem to ping anything on the show. So I was like, wow, that's weird. I personally was actually a little shocked when Georgia said scary. And then the subsequent conversation in this van, mainly because this is a younger generation and they were a generation that was like very active

and part of a lot of the conversation around these microaggressions that came out in 2020 so it was like shocking to me But maybe I shouldn't be shocked because you know white people are gonna white people But like I was sort of surprised that they were that they were surprised to be called out for microaggressions in this scene I'm like I'm like you guys are the young people It's it's like the old people that you would think would be the ones who'd be like, what, what? But like, you're the young people who should have been like, Oh my God, I'm so sorry. Like, I thought you all had many conversations about this and we're much more in tune about this than, than us.

You're the ones who've been schooling the old people. So what the hell? Yeah. Yeah. I thought maybe it's like, um, something that they just collectively were like, okay, I guess I don't know. Like it doesn't bother them as anyway, it pinged me too, but I didn't say anything at the time because I was like, what is it? What are these kids doing? I was like, yeah, it pinged me, but I was like, it didn't seem to be a storyline. I was like, okay, you know, okay, whatever. So then we see a flashback of what happened with Riley and this girl, Sylvia.

So Riley goes, what's your name? She goes Sylvia. Hi Sylvia. Nice to meet you. Sorry. I love my friend's girls. Ask my name. I'm his friend. So you should be nice to him. Like, yeah, she was basically the conversation. Well, she was like, yeah, like, um, basically like, why aren't you introducing yourself to us? Like, hello, we're here or something. And so Riley's like, yeah, I you introducing yourself to us? Like, hello, we're here or something.

And so Riley's like, yeah, I just went up and said, hey, I'm Riley. And like, you didn't say anything. You didn't introduce yourself to us. And Charlie's like, yeah, but like, what was the attitude? Like, oh yeah. And that's when he does this snappy finger head. She's like, no, I didn't.

And Charlie goes, yeah, the girl actually handled it well. And Ava's like, who? And he says the girl. Like, I'm saying that the girl handled it well. And Ava's like, who? And he says, the girl. Like I'm saying that the girl handled Riley well. And George was like, yeah, those girls never introduced themselves. That was off Charlie. And he's like, well, Riley never introduced herself.

And I didn't see her go up and say, hey, nice to meet you. First thing she did was like start accosting her. And so Riley's like had enough at this point. Yeah, so George is like, wait Riley. So Riley starts to cry and she's like, wait Riley, are. Yeah. So George is a wait Riley. Cause the rise starts to cry and she's like, wait Riley, are you okay? Do you need a hug? Don't touch me. I was like, no, I'm just mad because every you guys all do this. She's, and George is like, what are you really? What's, what's wrong? And so George,

Riley's like, I'm not trying to make it a thing, but I hate that when you guys try to play this, like I'm scary or I'm scaring the random white girl. It's just so annoying. And it just sucks because it's like a real thing that I have to go through every single day And I'm so fucking nice to everybody and there's always like everyone trying to come off whenever I talk to some white girl That I'm trying to scare them like no your girls were rude. It's disrespectful like you're around people introduce yourself And he goes well, I don't know about what them being white has to do with anything. Oh my God, Charlie, Rita, fuck it.

It's not about them being white. It's about you making Riley seem like she was a monster and like on a rampage and terrifying when actually the girls were the rude ones and Riley was trying to be nice, even though she was a little annoyed by them. Yeah, and she's like, you just like waved your finger and rolled your head.

Like, what the hell? He goes, oh yeah, that's not a racial thing. And she's like, okay, but then when have I ever done that? Like, when I ever like waved my finger and rolled my head. What the hell, don't do that. And he's like, um, yeah, I think this conversation is a little bit extra. Which in turn is yet another.

So she's like, well, fine. He's doing it again. Like this guy does not fucking listen or learn. What an idiot. So Ava's like, I think there are specific nuances that you don't even think about. And Charlie's like, well, I didn't, well, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I don't want to make you upset. And I was like, well, because you just did the same thing with the hand sanitizer thing, Georgia. You were like, oh yeah, you were just scary in the way you just said it and I let it go. So it did actually ping on the radar. And Georgia's like, well Riley, you said that hand washing thing's so calm to me.

And it was just a tone of voice thing. And I love you now, I'm over it. So she was- It's not about you being over it. She said it nice, but the tone was scary. Okay, how do you say something nice, but the tone is scary? Yeah, she said it was a tone thing. Oh my God. Calm, calm, but scary. Okay, how do you say something nice, but the tone is scary? Yeah, she said it was a tone thing. I'm like, calm, calm, but so she's like, I love you. I'm over it now. It's not about you being over it. It's not what you said.

So she's like, but yeah, but I was with you when this happened. And you're annoyed with the situation. And all I said is they should introduce themselves instead of you guys acting like we're two separate groups. It's like a manners thing. And Charlie's like, okay, okay, I subscribed to that logic. Okay. And she goes, yeah. So I'm just introducing myself to show manners that she did not show. And he's like, you confronted her.

This little girl. He goes, this little girl, you confronted her. And she goes, oh, really little girl? She's older than me because I'm taller, I scared her. Like, why are you trying to spin this narrative that I'm like this scary black girl when I'm not the scary black girl? He's just not getting it.

Oh my God. And also like Riley didn't, I didn't find that Riley was actually confrontational. She said, I mean, maybe she was, she like maybe a little sarcastic or whatever, but when she said- She was like, yeah, she was being sarcastic. She was like, hey, nice to meet you.

Thanks for introducing yourself. Like, what the hell? Like you come into a group of people and you don't even say hi, you know? Mm-hmm. So, Charlie's like, well, this is so far from what I said. Let's be very clear. She goes, no, it's your mannerisms.

You do this all the time. You don't realize when you do shit and it's annoying because it's bigger than just the stupid conversation because this shit I have to deal with and you're just adding to it. And he's like, well, I didn't mean to imitate you in an offensive way. And she's like, okay, well I'll just hit a cord. So Ava is saying how Riley is trying to explain to him like,

are there all these different microaggressions that she may be filling on a daily basis? And he contributed to it unknowingly as not his intention, but like, you know, like double, double down anywhere else you want in life. But when you've actually hurt your friend's feelings, you have to stop doubling down. Yeah, like, hello. So she's trying to explain it to him and he says, he's like, sorry for hurting your feelings.

I didn't mean to make you feel this way. And she's like, okay, but maybe be loving about it. You know, you don't need to defend yourself. And he goes, okay, you know what? I'm just gonna be silent. This is the classic thing. I can't say anything right. I'll just be quiet.

I'll be quiet. All these defensive women, I guess I'll just shut up now. So now he's the victim. Try it more. Yeah. So we get to New Jersey and everyone shows up and Charlie's like, by the way, nobody tells you about our fight because I don't want her to be mad at me too.

I don't need more enemies at this party. Oh, relax. Or you are the aggressor here. You cannot act like you're the victim of anything. So they go to the point you sit here while you sit here spending, talking about the entire episode, how, Oh, daddy doesn't love me. Daddy doesn't love me. And like you expect some sympathy from us. And yet when your friend expresses something that she wants sympathy for, suddenly it's like, oh, I can't say anything.

It's all defensive. I know, I see what you're trying to do, but at the end of the day, I feel like the audience is just feeling like your dad has a point. Yeah. So Riley goes off to the side and calls Candy. And she's like, you know,

when people try to mimic black woman and they like purse their lips and like start slinging their finger around and Candy's like, I know he did not. She's like, yeah. And you know, like I've heard the slurs and everything, but no one's ever, like none of my friends ever did it to me. I mean, wow. And so then Charlie is like, well, by the way,

like he's talking to Shy and he's like, by the way, I learned Sanskrit in elementary school. Yeah. I mean, I forgot it now, but like I know Sanskrit, so. I mean, the juxtaposition of this guy living in such privilege that he's in an elementary school where like the most important thing is to learn Sanskrit, like a dead language.

And he's like, yeah, it's like, he learned Sanskrit, but he did not learn how to actually relate to human beings. So, um, Riley's basically saying like, um, yeah, then basically after that, he was just like, Whoa, what? Oh, now you're trying to paint me as a racist. And I'm like, I'm not trying to, I'm not going to let you paint me as a scary black woman when I'm not. And candy's candy's like, well, I'm glad that you let him know.

I don't think it's cool. He wouldn't have done it if it was one of the white girls. And you know it just frustrates me to hear that because as a black woman, you're the minority and it's okay. And you have learned how to make friends in all different circles from all walks of life. And that's one thing I'm proud of you about. And you're not afraid to speak up for yourself,

which you shouldn't be afraid. And he's gonna have to learn to deal with black women. And if this is his first lesson, then let that be it. I was like, yes, candy first. I love candy. That was great. So then Brooks is talking to the psychic Amal. He's like, I wanted to find out if you have a message

for one of my friends, like maybe, be more respectful towards Brooks' sister because my friend went out with my sister. She's like, oh my God, I knew you were coming, please stop. I've already seen it, I'm already exhausted from this storyline, I saw it in the bus on the way here. Okay, listen, is your friend the one with the chain with the heart?

Because I could feel his energy, and he's probably the one that needs me the most. I will go to him. So now Charlie, meanwhile, is like, okay, I need to go apologize to Riley, because if I stay here, I think that psychic is gonna come try to talk to me. So, hey Riley, you wanna talk?

She's like, okay, well, let's get a drink first. They sit down to talk. And he's like, look, I wanna apologize again. I did not mean to make you that upset. I certainly did not mean to offend you with any imitation of you. She's like, yeah, I want to apologize again. I did not mean to make you that upset. I certainly did not mean to offend you with my any imitation of you. She's like, yeah, I mean, my only thing is that like, when you say that something has racial backgrounds to me,

you just don't understand that. And if I'm your friend, just listen what I'm saying and actually care about it. He's like, fair, fair, yeah, fair. Okay, yeah, I see your point of view. Totally fair, yep, glad I heard you on this. Genuinely sorry, okay, genuinely sorry. So she's like, okay. So they hug. And then, meanwhile, Ariana is also acting out. She's like, Oh my God, I'm going in the pool. Make

sure my tampons strings are hanging out. And then party stuff happening, making the pizza, Charlie and Ava are cutting dough into a heart. And Riley is like, they're just like joking about it. Like, oh my God, like, is your man gonna get jealous? So Georgia talks to Charlie and she's like, did you apologize? He goes, yeah, but I already apologized on the bus to be clear. She goes, no, but like sometimes you're just like,

I'm sorry, but like not really like I'm sorry. And he goes, cause I'm not really sorry. And she's like, well, don't, don't say that. So there's another guy here, Cooper, who's George's best friend. He's like another gay. And he's like, well, don't say that. And Charlie's like, well, can't people just be happy? I'm saying sorry. Like, you can't make me feel sorry. Like I said, sorry, what more do you want from me? So Cooper's like, um, hi, I'm Cooper. And I'm about to get on this show. Excuse me.

So meanwhile, Charlie goes up to Chloe's like, Hey, you got any plans this weekend? You want to chill and give Seth more ammo? And she's like, yeah, that's actually what I had on my books. Like I was like Saturday, hang out with Charlie, press him so that my dad gives them more problems. So meanwhile, so Charlie's not watching time to make my move. press him so that my dad gives him more problems. So meanwhile, Cooper's like, okay, Charlie's not watching. Time to make my move. So he goes on over and he's like, um, yeah. So, hey Ava?

So I was like talking to like Charlie a second ago and like he said he's like not apologetic at all. Yeah, pass it along. He's like, oh my God, that's so annoying. And so she's like, that is so rude to Riley. My God. So now she goes to Riley and Shai and she's like, yeah, hey guys, can I sit down?

Okay, so here's what I heard. Charlie's not really sorry. And Riley's like, okay, that's hurtful. And Ava's like, yeah, and I'm close to Charlie. And I wanted to know if you wanted to speak to him about it in a way that could maybe get through to him a little bit more. Oh my God.

And Riley's like, well, you're another black woman. So I mean, whatever. I guess he views you the same way he views me, but I'm bigger and I'm from the South. Like we're just different, you know? Like you're from New York and you have these New York experiences and I'm not in New York.

I just wish you would tell him, like, I'm a black woman too. And doing like a head roll and a finger wave, like that hurts, you know? And you have to know, let him know that's not okay, you know? So I like that Riley's like, yeah, I can talk to him, but so can you, Eva. And so Charlie sits down and then Eva confronts Charlie. Just kidding, it was Riley,

because Eva's not going to necessarily yet. So Riley, he sits down and she's like, hey, I heard you said that you didn't actually believe what you said, you just said it to appease me. He's like, in a way, yeah, but like, is that what you want? We've been over this, I apologize. And she's like, you know what, we're good, we're good.

He's like, oh, well, I hope you mean that. I'm like, oh, so you want her to be sincere for appeasement, but you get to appease. Okay, got it. Yeah. So she just walks away and Ava's like, Charlie, I'm really trying to be your friend. And he goes, oh, now you're mad at me. Oh, great, great, great.

Now everything's mad. Now everybody's mad at me. You know what? I'm not going to sit here and listen to this. And she's like, okay, then I'm done helping you. He goes, yeah, I'm done. I'm out of here. I never asked for your help with Riley. I'm done. I'm not gonna sit here and listen to this. And she's like, okay, then I'm done helping you. He goes, yeah, I'm done, I'm outta here. I never asked for your help with Riley, I'm done, I'm outta here. So then he goes up to Riley, he's like, are we okay now?

Are we fighting again? Cause now I'm fighting with Ava about this. And she's like, okay, but like, you just need to realize that you have black women that are friends. And he's like, oh God, I thought we were fine. Now we're not fine. Wow, wow. And he's like, Oh God, I thought we were fine. Now we're not fine.

Wow. Wow. Yeah. So now he's going to walk away and, uh, and then like, she's like, no, wait, stop. Like, just like, like, let's talk about this. She grabs his hand and he's like, Oh, well let go of my hand. I'm not having this conversation again. I'm getting an Uber. So she's like, whatever. She lets go. And Brooks is like, wow, that's like fucked up, right?

Chloe and Chloe's like, what's wrong with him? So he goes inside the house and there's like a mile fine. Mal's like, now's my chance. She's like, so I did want to tell you that you have beautiful energy and if you're open to it, I would love to just to sit with you and just talk, not even two cars, just talk. I don't know.

I'm single, you're single, we're adults, we're consenting. I don't know, whatever you want. He's like, no, no, I'm going to politely decline, but I appreciate the offer. Okay, thanks. And she's like, I'm going to light a candle for you, like a dead person. I'm going to pretend you have passed onto the spirit world,

did not just diss me like this on television. He's like, whatever, crazy. So he leaves and he's like, I'm totally jumping over the dogg's like, I also like that. I'm jumping over the doggy gate. I also liked that in the middle of this shy is like inside there's like a, like a cheese board and shy is like, what is that? Is that cheese? Is it not cheese? I can't tell. I mean, it's orange. Is this cheese?

And then I think it was Ava was like, wow, you weren't sure what it was, but you ate like half of it. That's a big tester bite. You ate like half of it. That's a big tester bite. And that brings us to the end of Next Gen NYC. Loved it. Lived it. Great times. Learned it.

Thanks everyone for being here and get tickets for our show at watchwhatcrappens.com and we'll catch you on the next episode. Bye everyone. Watch What Crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alice in King. Our way is the Amber way.

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