Watch What Crappens - #3047 RHOSLC S605 Part One: The Fart of War

Episode Date: October 22, 2025

This is part one of a two-part recapReal Housewives of Salt Lake City centers on a silent but deadly argument, a cherry-less marriage, and the road to Below Deck. Oh, and Bronwyn might be a fraud. To watch this recap on video, listen to our bonus episodes, and participate in live episode threads, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wondry Plus subscribers can listen to Watcher Crappins ad free right now. Join Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts. Hello, and welcome to the dulcet tones of Watch What Crapins. I'm Ronnie. That's Ben over there. Hello, Ben. Hi, Ronnie. How's it going? Good. Welcome to the show, everybody. It's Real Housewives of Salt Lake City Day. We're very excited to be here. Go check out our bonus. This week we talk about, you know, diets.

We worry about calories, concerts, stuff. Stuff like that. And also, we talked to Leah Black on Crappia. Thanks to everybody who joined us for that. That was super fun. This coming Monday is Amazon Live. That's at 4 p.m. Pacific Time. And if you want these videos, these recaps on video, we do videos every day. Find them at Crappence on demand on Patreon as well as our bonus episodes. Okay, welcome to Salt Lake City. How are you feeling today, buddy? Feeling great. I really enjoyed this episode. It was a nice kind of counterbalance to the last episode being so crazy. And this one's like, you know, people chatting. It's really also fun to see Heather trying to gracefully have a separation from Lisa Barlow. But we all see what she's doing. She's, she visited Barlow as a friend.

And she's like, I don't want to do this anymore, but I don't want to be the bad guy. So let me just like try to go around and make it seem like I'm the mature adult before I totally turn on her. Yeah. Yeah, let me pretend I haven't been, let me pretend I've actually been this person's friend this whole time instead of actively working behind her back to get everyone else to turn on her. So I'm not the only one trying to turn on Lisa again.

Yes, exactly. But I really enjoyed it a lot. And we also, by the way, we watched Wife Swap, which will be recapping. And I don't know if you mentioned that, because I zoned out for a second, which was all about Angie Katzenavis. So it's like, I feel like it was like big Angie Katznavus energy last night.

I thought she was really entertaining. and yeah great episode big greek energy last night big greek energy here on bravo so we open with angie and heather facetiming they're both making coffee heather has an entire drawer of curigs now i haven't seen that you missed it no i saw that i thought the same i was like why doesn't she get one of those organizers i actually love her i actually love her version of it i have to say love her kyrig style because i can't find a decent kyrig organizer but it doesn't make me nuts. I've tried so many different kinds.

They take up too much space. They're ugly. I don't like them. But having a whole drawer, I mean, that is privilege right there. When you have your own drawer to just put your curing pods in there, right?

That's what I was thinking. I am like the way I, the way I dedicate space to different things in every drawer of my kitchen to just have a drawer dedicated pods, I was like, wow. She has a lot of storage.

That's what that means. Because that's, that was so what my thought was. I was like, man, the way I'm tetrissing my ice cream scoop in, which I don't even have anymore because it wound up in the dishwasher and got ruined. But like when I did have it, the way I would tetriss it in with like a garlic press and then like a spatula. And then she just has, you know, just like, oh, let's just take up all the space with some cape, some, yeah, that's a woman with not a lot of kitchen gadgets. I don't think there's a lot of cooking going on there. She's like, now that my girls are leaving, I finally have a curing drawer.

Thank God. I call this to thank God those little bitches are conjure. I know. By the way, it was a rather extended compare and contrast montage between Heather and Angie making coffee. I don't know why we necessarily needed it. I guess what we saw was Heather's was the curig, was Angie's more. How did she, I don't even remember how she made hers, but they just were it was like comparing a contrast like, look at how two different housewives and so like sitting there's coffee in the morning. So Heather has whipped cream on my lip, more proof that, I mean, that's a privilege to you. I mean, whipped cream on your coffee? What kind of life is she leading? I've never really been jealous of Heather's life, but today I was.

I was like, Heather is living the life with her big H cup. Because her name is Heather. I'm assuming that's why, Heather. What if it wasn't for that? Or it could be a heathen, because Stanford heathen, it could have been a parting gift from the church. Because now she's hosting surviving Mormonism. Please tell me how you survive. the trauma of Mormonism. Did you write

three bestseller books? No, you didn't. So have you really survived it? I don't think so. What's it like swimming without long underwear? Oh, yes. Surviving Mormonism is coming up soon. I'm not watching that because

I'm already surviving you surviving Mormonism. I've had enough, but not enough without survive. I've had enough of surviving Mormonism. How about you? Are you gonna watch it um i don't know like serious bravo is kind of like is a weird thing it's gonna be a serious show where heather goes and talks to people and interviews and then drives home and cries in her car about what she just experienced so i'm not really sure if it's something i'm going to watch i'm gonna still be a little TBD and unless they have like stories of you know like

the scientology ones where the Mormons are like chasing you through the hills and stuff like that, you know, because those got really juicy, those Scientology ones. But I don't know, maybe things will change. But right now, no. But I am jealous of your coffee drawer, H. So, by the way, it's just like hard for me to take seriously any three-part series that's about like, you know, ongoing religious trauma hosted by the lady who has a whole bunch of curing pods in her drawer.

Like, I just, I don't know why. It's just, Heather Gay, I know that's all I dead of you. Well, it's just that she's. silly. She's a silly person. And so to all of a sudden have this very serious show where she's going to like have her fingers on her chin and be listening and choking up and relaying experiences, I don't know why. It just sort of feels like a contrast to them what you see, the cartoons of Salt Lake City, right? Yeah, I mean, I don't know. I just, I perform more of an action, more of an action type thing. Like, I want to see you escaping Mormonism.

know what I mean? Show, don't tell. I want it to be like apocalypse now, you know, running. I think they've got to rescue, actively rescue someone. Yeah, you know, like throw a smoke grenade in the temple and go in there and get a bunch of people with braids and pull them out. You know, braids and flower dresses, like big love style. Well, so, well, maybe like more polygamous makeovers or something.

I don't know. I feel like there's an angle, but. I like that. Yeah, you know, I would love cult makeover. Like, people have just been. people who've just been rescued from a cult and now they get a makeover yeah because heather's always trying to kind of bridge her or trying from what we've heard on the show and you know it's fragmented over the years but i don't know that she ever left because wasn't she talking about how she was

keeping her names on the role and all that that stuff you know so i don't know that she technically left or she got kicked out when she got divorced i forget the whole story of it but i don't know i would I think that she still kind of likes it in a weird way. And I haven't listened to all the podcasts she's done. It's actually a lot of serious work she's done. Like, we're just making fun of her and stuff. But, you know, she's actually done a lot of deep thinking into this. But I think that she still kind of likes it in some kind of way because she talks about it so much.

I mean, I think that there could be like a makeover for Mormonism. Like, I just want, you know what, let's make Mormonism better. Like, what can we fix? Oh, so we're just going to like ignore all the hard work. of mom talk. Hello. They are revamping what Mormonism can be. Thank you. Thanks a lot, Ronnie.

They're just a patriarchy. Did you not even notice all their hard work? Yeah. I wonder what they are thinking of this documentary. They're like, oh my God, how will this affect mom talk? So anyway, that's coming up. So they're gossiping on the phone and they're talking about Mary and Angie's like well, I sent her a message

and asked her if she could stop by. I hope she can remember that she loves me but then she's still really upset because she's like you know you know mary's sensitive but i will not be bullied by lisa that's not fair you know and she points out that she used to be super close with lisa and now she's super close with mary and against lisa and it's just crazy isn't it this cycle of house wivory do you think angie's being bullied by lisa no i think i think i think angi started it in this i think andy started it this season she was the one who was talking with everybody else about Lisa being a fraud and those stories and then said

Lisa was like Jen Shaw. So she started it. So, you know, I don't know that she needs to apologize. I don't know that it was that deep. But, you know, she started it. Now she's acting all belligerent. Like, I can't believe you. I think actually Bronwyn started it, didn't she? Technically, I think Bronwyn started that talk. And then. Well, she started it. But I mean, the fight between Lisa and. Between the two of them. Right. Between the two of them. If anybody started it, it was Angie. Yeah, I think, I think Angie's biggest transgression was, I think that she was actually totally fair, it was totally fair of her to say, you know, I invested money in your company

and you're not even promoting this company that you courted my investment for and you're going off promoting a different company. I think that's totally fine. I think when she did say it's like collecting dust in your salon, it's like, it does have to do with the kids. It's a great area. I can understand the trigger there. but I also do think that like once you have that apology they apologize at the table at that one at that one thing and it should have been done and then Lisa reopened it again and so you know it's a weird thing because Angie did she did sort of like indirectly go after the kids but it also felt like it should have been a closed case by then so I don't I don't know I think that I think that Lisa it

should have been done and put in the past and Lisa decided, no what, let me go back in and be petty again. So I do kind of put a little bit more blame on Lisa in the current state of affairs, but I don't think that Lisa was bullying Angie. And I think that she is, Angie is using the bully card in the classic housewives way, which is excessively and maybe unwarrantedly. Yeah. So she's like, you know, Lisa, I've wasted time and shown aside. of myself that I don't want to see and nobody else wants to see you know what I mean and so now she feels guilty for yelling at Lisa but she's still pissed because she's like why is it Lisa can you know hurt us all the time and she's always busy crying about what other people think about her but

I'm the one who leaves feeling guilty because I could have handled things differently and I felt protective of every one of us that day it wasn't just about me it was about real courage takedowns. You were all dolmas about to be dipped into catch-up. Well, I don't need her to be perfect or be good, but I need her to listen to me and to just acknowledge something so that I know it's a two-way street. This is a sisterhood and it's a sisterhood that follows traffic directions. And if you're driving down the street, one car's going one way, another's going another way. And we stay in our lanes because otherwise we crash and the sisterhood dies. Do you understand?

what I'm saying, Angie. So Heather's like, yeah, if anyone's going to help her change, it's going to be us. Her sisters. We know her. We love her. We've been through and with her, you know? Ups, downs, deeps, shallows. We're there. Thick or thin.

We're already halfway there. I appreciate Angie's taking accountability. And in my heart of hearts, I believe that Lisa is capable of admitting fault as well. And if she doesn't, well, I guess, We'll just start the smear campaign because we are a sisterhood, and that's what we do. I love that Heather is giving this whole, oh, we're going to save Lisa from herself from getting upset and causing trouble.

You were the one who caused all of this. You were the one who took Lisa to lunch and sat her down and said, everybody was talking about you. The first episode, and you weren't there. Everybody talked about you. I was the only person who stood up for you. And that girl, Angie, called you Jen Shaw. And now she's like, oh my God, I just don't understand why Lisa's so upset. We need to stop Lisa from getting so upset.

You started this fire, and now you're running around like you all need to call the fire department and put Lisa out, Heather. You are so right about that. That is hilarious. I forgot. But she is the one who exacerbated the stuff between Angie and Lisa. Because when Angie said it, everyone said Angie, that's not nothing. nice and Angie goes, sorry, bad joke. She literally, she kind of like, she acknowledged, whoops, went too far in that moment.

And then Heather went and then still told it to Lisa and inflamed the two of them. Wow. So, so right. Yeah. So she's like, well, we're going on below deck. And when I announced a trip, Lisa wasn't even there. Poor thing. The sister missed the news.

But I've spoken with Captain Jason and arranged to charter his super yacht in Canawan. We're going to the island. So they're going to a super yacht. So she sent an invite to everybody and we don't know if Lisa's going to go. But we hope she does because it's a sisterhood. Sisters yacht together. So, yeah, she wants that to be a bonding moment. Now we go to Bronwyn and Todd and they go to an ice cream parlor called Snellgrove.

I don't know what Snellgrove if there's any other meaning to it than that. But now is the time for ice cream. Impala. Faster. Eat your ice cream fatsa. Snella Fatsa. These are two people that do not belong in Snellgrove. Because Snelli Grove has all sorts of painted murals on the walls of children eating ice cream.

And there's sort of like general happiness and mirth. And then you've got Todd in there, like the angry, angry Winnie the Pooh. You've got grandpa. And the girl cosplaying is his granddaughter, like, dressed in like a little girl's church dress in a gigantic headband. It's like, ooh. Yeah, like a bow. So they just like, I was like, have they ever eaten ice cream before? Do they even know what they're doing?

Like, they just seem so unnatural in this space. Yeah, whenever people accuse you of marrying your grandpa, it's good to just go on ice cream dates in giant headdance. They're just such an odd pair of people, not even that they're odd because of age difference. I mean, they are. That's something that contributes. but just as people, they're just odd people, you know, which I like. So here we, how many ice cream dates do we get between husbands and wives I'm into it in bright pink?

Yeah, I just, I kind of like she looked like she should have walked into the ice cream store with one of those giant rainbow lollipops that's the size of the head. Like, it's time for ice cream. I'm Rowan. Like, that's sort of how she looked. And yeah, there was, like, we're very used to May December relationships on Bravo, but, but in this scene, it. really did read as like mother, I mean, not father or daughter. It was really weird. And I try to be

like open minded to those age differences, but, but this scene in particular was, it just, it's just, it's weird. You don't feel like they interact like husband and wife sometimes. It seems like, because he's like a grump and he's sitting there. He's in the happiest place in all of the greater Snell Grove region. And he's sitting there with a scowl on his face, eating his little raspberry swirl ice cream. It's like, Could you at least enjoy yourself? Can you enjoy that you're having a moment with your wife, your hot wife? Jesus.

No, I'm going to take a moment to stand up for Todd here and say, some of us enjoy ourselves by not enjoying ourselves, you know? And I think that that's just Todd's vibe. And also, I think that Todd's a jerk to Bronwyn on camera. And I think it reads really scarily for their marriage. And I'm wondering, like, when she's divorcing him, because it seems like she's kind of setting us up for that. But on the other hand, I do think that he's like,

I don't want to do this show. I told you I don't want to do this show. You're making me do this show a fucking again after you've been crying ever since you stopped shooting the last season of this show. And now I have to come to this show and talk about these women who are torturing you even more and give you advice and act like I give a shit about these people. Why are you making me do this? I think that's fine.

And that's 100% his energy. And I picked up on that also. But how many times has Bronwyn had to go to work events for him and she has to smile through like insufferable work parties? It's like, we know you don't want. It's true. At least make an effort, okay? Like, could you not make it seem like your wife's job is the biggest burden to you? Like, she's bringing in money, okay? She's actually doing something. You're right. You're right. Like, he may hate it, but, you know, it's your job as a spouse to pretend you don't hate stuff. You know, we all do it. Yes. I'm going to, you know, I sat through Sean Mendez the other day with a smile on my face. You know, did I have to get high to do it? Yes, but I did it because that's what you do for people you love, you know, and they come to crap. and shows and sit through that. I know they don't want to sit through that shit. But yeah, you're right. I think that that is what you do for life. It's like he made you back. Fuck you straight up.

Yeah, fuck him. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crap and's commercial. I enjoyed Todd last season, but I feel like he's been, he's, he's exceptionally surly now in a righteous way. Before it was like he was awkward on camera, but I sort of saw some, but like now he, Now he's been through it and now he's being a dick about it. And it's like, you know what? Your wife is allowed to make choices and allowed to do a TV show if she wants. And the only reason why there's any sort of, you know, embarrassment coming to your household right now is because of you. It's like the we're sitting here talking about this situation because of your attitude.

Yeah. Be just enjoy yourself. Enjoy the fact that you're enjoying, you're having ice cream. Okay. And then. Well, also, you know, what kind of bugs me about him. is he acts like he's so above the other ladies, you know, he's like, oh, I'm just so above this. Everybody gossiping and na, nah, nah, but he's not above talking shit about people.

He's the meanest husband on here to the other housewives and calls them names and says all kinds of stuff about them. And he also seems to love to gossip about them. So it kind of makes me crazy because it's kind of that attitude of people who are above housewives in general, but then act worse than real housewives do in real life, you know? And you're like, oh, really? you're too mature for this show. Then you see them fighting over a football game.

You know, we talked about that a million times. But he reminds me of one of those people. Like, you're not better than this, sir. I've seen no proof that you're better than this. So Bromwin's doing your whole, like, I'm just so happy in this relationship. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah, it's great.

I got myself a whole Sunday, Todd. A whole Sunday. You remember how he did that when we first got together? Oh, but I got this drink because it has a merino cherry's in it. And you know, I get so mad when I have a dessert. And then you immediately take the cherry off the top. You know I hate that, which is why I got a cherry. And you're not going to take it off.

You took the cherry. How can you do that, God? And he just does it. That's actually the most dick thing that he does. She literally states her case for America to be like, aha, now you're locked in. Now it's been stated to the world. So now you cannot take that cherry because the world is watching you. And he takes the cherry anyway, which was dick.

But also, Bron, when you know you can ask for more than just one cherry. I just want to put that out there. You guys can get two cherries. That way you can each have one. Yeah. Make him get a cherry or order him a cherry or sit down and eat the cherry. You know what I mean? Instead of sitting there, leaving it on top and waiting for Todd to eventually get to your cherry,

which you know is going to happen. So I don't know. There's just so many vibes in here that I'm not even sure who to blame, you know, because I get kind of mad watching the both of them. I'm like, neither of you want to be here. You know what? what i mean neither of you want to be here it's like going to a restaurant you don't want to eat at and then you sit there miserable the whole time like i drove myself here i walked myself in here

and i ordered from here i i've just never seen such a miserable scene in an ice cream parlor before i just it's i know i've talked a lot about being on my no-carb month but i was like do you realize the privilege you have you're eating ice cream now put a smile on your face and enjoy it and go to up to the counter or get yourself another cherry god damn it exactly you guys can't even enjoy the best things in life do you like the cherry i don't love the cherry i love the stem because i learned how to tie stems when i worked next to the bowling alley bar as a kid because the i used to cook at the snack shop and the bowling alley bar had a window to the snack shop so he could pass food back and forth and they were like chain

smoking daughters of ed was his name he owned the bar and they used to show me how to tie cherry stems and once i finally got it i don't remember ever feeling that amazing sense, actually. Practice, practice, practice, and then I got it. I was like, you have to like clamp down some of the stem with your teeth or something to like hold it in place and you do the tongue to move it around. Like, how do you do it? Yeah, crazy.

Basically, you hold part down with your teeth and then you, you know, you got to work your tongue. Got to work that tongue around. Move it around. You got to really feel it. Yeah, you got to be part of that cherry stem for a while, you guys. It's like acting. Yeah, be one with it.

You got to get method with it. so brawin asked todd how new york was whatever new york is and he's like i was god and she's like okay and he's always in new york dad yeah he was yeah and he's like they were good and she's like okay pod's parents are still alive good for him i know i was impressed good for them what are they they must be eating a lot of avocados we were talking about how healthy avocados were before we've looked it up yeah then looked at chat they're very healthy i think has been parents are on we even looked it up we went so far that's under the conversation we were we were like let's google it how healthy are avocados for you um and we found out they're like super healthy you guys

so i think todd's parents are like bathing in avocados or something yeah my my poor friend aces is alerted to avocados so she can't even get the health benefits so tragic it's not fair um so brawin is like well todd we talked about you that 30 seconds ago you just eat the cherry why How would you do that? Why would you eat the cherry? Okay. So did you like the selfie I took yesterday? My outfit for Whitney's? You would have been so proud of me.

I mean, I can't even imagine talking to like Dom like this. Did you like my selfie? Did you see it? You would have been so proud of me. Do you like it? I mean, I would definitely say, hey, did you see the selfie I sent you? I picked out a cute outfit. What do you think?

But like, there's just something about like how she's kind of like trying to pry out conversation from him that I'm like, have you guys ever talked before? It's just a barrage of things he's not interested in. It's kind of my point. She's like, hey, did you go on the Instagram? Have you been on TikTok? Have you seen my selfie? He's like, no, I don't, what are you talking about?

You get a tin type and we'll talk about it. Yeah. She's, well, I don't think I reads my voice one time. I wasn't, I wasn't in any of the chaos, which was fun at this party. And I'm always excited to see where it goes, Lisa, right? And she came in and we were fine. And in fact, she and Angie got like really crazy arguing with each other. And then Andy was making some, like, really valid points.

Uh-huh. And Lisa did, like, she did, like, dig stuff up on us. Remember, she did do that. And she does twist things that people tell her. And she does, like, she does a threatening thing. And Todd's just, like, she's going on and on about this. And Todd's just staring into his, like, ice cream and just, like, eating it. Sort of like, when, you know when they show nature videos of, like,

like, like, feeding a turtle. And the turtle's always like, it's always like, and you always see all the stuff in the turtle's mouth. And you're like, does the turtle like it? And you're not sure what the turtle likes it or not, but the turtle eats it anyway. And then it's like, okay. get ready for more. That's kind of what Todd's energy is with the ice cream. Yeah, Todd just does not want to hear this shit. He's like, oh my God, here we go again. But you know, Lisa does dig stuff up on people, Todd. Mm-hmm. She sure does. I'm like, you just did it too, though. Yeah, but she sure does

Todd. And she does twist things, Todd. You know, that she does twist things. And, you know, she does this threatening, like, don't start with me or I'll ruin you. But, you know, I heard Angie say at one point that I'm not going to be bullied by this. Like, I'm going to stand up for myself, I know you don't care about the details. And he's like, at all. I don't care about the details at all. Let me tell you what I care more about than the details of this story. Tiki talky. You want me to do an arm band? What do I have to do to get out of this? Well, do I get a high five? Do we get a high five or something for like not being in the chaos? He's like, well, congratulations and thank you is what you get. Like Todd, you better not be dampening

Bronwyn's star because like we've seen this happen before. this happened with Paige de Sorbo when she was dating Perry and some other people like, you know, it happened with Stasi and Patrick. Like, don't, you know, like let our Bravo ladies be Bravo ladies. And to the Bravo ladies, don't let these guys tell you how you should act because this is your career that's going on right now. Well, I don't think he's really telling her how to act, is he? Look, I mean, look, I'm going to put it this way.

We all have that overdramatic friend who's constantly calling us my boyfriend or a girlfriend depending on who it is like my boyfriend is you know this way he's emotionally abusive he's a jerk he did this to me he did that to me he cheated on me he did that and you're like you have to get out of there you spend hours on the phone giving this person advice and supporting them and wanting to be there and what's the first thing they do when they get the chance is go back to that guy and then they come back like oh everything's great we had a great time it was so good we had a we're back together and you're supposed to be like woohoo when's the wedding you know I mean at some point you're like, how long do you get to just ruminate on this toxic bullshit and drag me through

this toxic bullshit and our family through and cry and moan and this and that? And then you're like, everything's great. We're going on a trip. Isn't that great? Let's talk about Lisa some more. It's like, oh, my God. You know, that's a separate thing. I get that it's like, what do you mean?

Because I agree. I agree with you totally. I think Todd's totally within his rights to say, okay, like I've warned you, Lisa's no good for you. So if you go back, you try to mend things with her, that's fine. But if it falls apart again, I really don't want to hear it. That's fine. I'm just saying that when she's like, did you see, I didn't yell. Wasn't I so good?

I didn't yell. I didn't get into the chaos. Wasn't I had good behavior? I'm like, I don't want Bronwyn changing her behavior. Oh, I see. He's Todd. That's what I was saying. Yeah.

But your point was absolutely correct. Yeah, you're supposed to yell. Yeah. Todd's reaction should have been, well, were you going to work or not? You should have been missing. Are you going to be in any clips? If I do go on TikTok, are you going to be in any clips from the show? No, because you didn't yell at anyone, Ron Wayne.

So if you're going to drag this family through your drama, you better at least make it into some clips on the tiki-toggy. It's like the person at Sveldgaard saying, like, guess what, at work today? You'd be so proud of me. I didn't serve any soft serve. I was really good about it. It's like, what?

That's your job. Do the service of the solvers. I came home from building the house. I didn't lay one brick. Like, aren't you going to get fired? You're a bricklayer. Get back there. Get to it.

So she's telling us, look, Todd is just over this group of women. And in his mind, I just can't keep showing up at the circus and being shocked by the clownery. Which is fair. I mean, you can't be shocked by the clownery. But Todd should allow you to go to the circus. So I don't think anybody's going to be shocked by the clownery with you. You literally have a dinosaur costume that your mom is folding up right now, that you go to the airport in. I think it would be more shocking if you went to the circus.

And then it turns out that, like, Meg Whitman gave a speech. That would be more shocking because you know that there's going to be clowns at the circus. So there's nothing shocking about that. It would be more shocking if the former CEO of eBay made a speech instead. Well, I think it's fair to go to the circus and be annoyed by the clowns. Yes. And Meg Whitman. Really?

I was like just trying to think of someone random and corporate, like not. not someone who does not speak of the circus. I was like, uh, Meg Whitman. I love keeping it current. I know. I'm very.

Well, she does have Meg Whitman hair kind of. Okay. So, Bromwin's like, I mean, I did, I did have this moment of like,

Wobble, you know, when Lisa and I talked last week and I was really quick to just be like, I don't want to do this anymore. We could ruin each other. We, we shouldn't.

ruin each other, and I do stand by that. But do you think, you think I was too quick to neutralize this, Todd? Do you think I should keep fighting with Lisa? Do you? Todd? Oh, my God, I love all these answers. Well, Todd knows. Todd's not going to answer, so I'll tell you that Todd knows me better than most people. And, you know, it's just always shocking to me that he doesn't know why I'm still trying to be friends with these women. I mean, I accepted Lisa's apology, and I, and, you know, an apology as a kickoff to paving a new way forward. And Todd doesn't need to agree for that opinion of mine to be valid that I'm going to talk to Lisa again. So thank you for agreeing with me, Todd, that it's good that I'm talking to Lisa again. Oh, gosh. Oh,

this is the best part. Whitney had a psychic come from New York. And he's like, oh, for Christ's sake. What do you tell you? Lisa's a bitch. I could have told you that. Here's a psychic prediction. Good luck saving the next cherry till the end of the Sunday. The tad monsters on top of it. I got a psychic. You're not going to be digesting the cherry anytime soon. well um the psychic he started with my mom first and he was like this time uh like this time this is as recovered she's gonna get uh-huh and he goes oh well is that his medical opinion i'm like well you're not a doctor either todd i know but i like that i like that she didn't give the full information because what the psychic actually said was something along the lines of

you guys haven't been checking the right place it's actually something wrong what do you say like in her brain or something like she's got some he specifically told her some other medical issue and i like that rama was like no we definitely need to get her blood tested you know she's just like well she said that's recovered if she's going to get she's going to die sooner than we thought so it was free the whole thing was free well i don't believe any of this i think it's all craziness Todd how could you say it no i meant crazy that yours came with a cherry and mine didn't what is this place i'm never coming back And she's like, okay, do you feel like you can suspend your bullshit meter like a second?

Because it really felt like a warning. I mean, he said it's kind of time to, you know, move past this with your mom. And he's like, look, it's probably a 50-50 guess, okay? That's what psychics are good for. They're good for guessing, right? Let me tell you what guess is worth. A fart in the wind, that's about what they're worth. Todd, okay, well, you didn't actually have to fart right now in the wind.

That was, you know, we're trying to hear. Don't make fun of my farts. How dare you? That's divorce worthy. You know, you're really bumming me out. I'm just like trying to tell you something that I really enjoyed. And I'm sitting here trying to like, I'm just, I'm just getting upset. And I'm just, I'm sitting here.

I'm trying to have ice cream with you. You're eating my cherry. And I'm trying to tell you something that was funny. And you know how I, you know, because nothing makes you laugh more than a psychic that says your mom might die soon, right? And I was like, where's the funny part? You know how I feel when people misunderstand me. And I shouldn't have to feel I'm misunderstood by you too. Like, I should have to beg you.

I shouldn't have to beg you to think that this is interesting. I shouldn't have to beg you to let you know that Whitney's psychic from New York said something interesting to me at a party when we're all yelling at each other. And he's just like, he doesn't really say anything. He just kind of looks at her and like moves his jowls a little bit. And so she's like, well, I'm very accepting that Todd is less emotional than I am. And I would just love to feel the acceptance when I'm more emotional than he is. And I'd love to get to a point where I, like, don't have to get this upset for him to notice it. But it's a process.

It's a process. It's like you weren't going to hit yourself on the eyes with your, if, with your headband, if you don't stop nodding your head. It's going to hurt. Maybe that's why it's so weighted. It's gigantic. It's enormous. Todd, I'm not telling you he gave me numbers and I converted our life savings into a lottery ticket. I'm telling you, if it touched something in me, then it's worthwhile.

That's, okay, well, that's an awesome thing to do, and I'm sorry. I was like, oh. And that's just it. A begrudging apology from Todd. What a weird scene. It really was. Yeah. I don't know.

I feel like you should be happier than this in a marriage. But maybe not. I mean, I don't know. I would think so too. What's it like? Everybody, tell us. Okay, so then we go to Lisa's house. You have to imagine there's also some stress on that relationship with

muzzie hanging around that household. Everything's fine. Everything's fine. As her sweatshirt says. Yeah. Well, this is not a new dynamic. for Bromwin and Todd. And it's just one of those relationships you look at,

like how is this a thing? Like how are these people doing it and saying they're happy? You know, because they both, they both say they're happy, but it doesn't look like they're happy, but I don't know, maybe they're happy being unhappy. I don't know, I don't know. Should she leave?

I don't even know if she should leave. Does she like it? I mean, does she like being with Todd? Is he like really soft and cuddly when the cameras aren't on? I mean, I just don't know. I don't really get it. I don't know. I kind of feel like,

everyone should be the same either way. Someone on Twitter says, Todd loves his wife, but doesn't understand her need to be on television, and Brahman loves Todd, but loves being famous more. And then Brian Moylan said, absolutely correct.

They now value different things. And I think divorce is inevitable. So there, from Brian Moyland, the chairman of the Institute of Housewives. You heard it there first. Well, that's, yeah, I can see that. You know, I think that's a problem with a lot of these shows, you know, when one goes off and become famous,

because the husband is, You know, it's like if, especially if they married someone rich. Like, in this case, she's married to Todd, who's very well known and makes a lot of money. So he was kind of the star in their relationship, and that changed over. And I don't see somebody just being like, oh, you don't like TV? Okay, I'll give all that up. Yeah, yeah. So now we go to Lisa's house, and she's packing for the below deck trip.

And John comes in with some suitcases. She's, oh, yeah, hey, remember when we went on that yacht trip? and I had like nine suitcases and I was like this is nuts he's like yeah overkill where where are you guys going in kind of on yeah so I think it's like by the galapagos islands and then we see a map that shows that they are nowhere near each other whatsoever yeah and she's like yeah there's nothing better than when you get on a boat and it's like oh I'm just thinking about a pinia calada and boom you get a pinia calada like it's the best thing ever so I'm sure this is going to be fun But, you know, like, it's only three days, but I'm just going seven to ten, but whatever, I'm going with poor people.

So that's how it is, you know. But I wish I had some say on the guest list because it would be very different. It would be a very different guest list if I had to say. By the way, John, I forgot to tell you, I like talk to a psychic. Yeah, at Whitney's party. He, like, brought up at, like, all, all, he brought up us. And he was like, do you guys feel like you're having a communication problem right now, you know? And John's like, well, maybe he was picking up.

Yeah, because I mean like it really resonated when he said you guys are having communication problems. Like you're not on the same page with things. Lisa interrupting John to find out if they have an communication problem is perfectly Sabarlo. I wish they just showed that scene. I think it was from last season where John comes in and Lisa's on her phone. He's like, hey, honey.

I was wondering if you want dinner and she's just ignoring him on his phone. Yeah. And maybe we could go over our. taxes later. She just ignores him this wife. He tries like five different things and she never even looks at him once and he finally just like shrugs and walks out of the room. It's perfect. That is their communication. That is it. Yeah. So Lisa is like, yeah, it really resonated me when he said that you guys are having communication problems. Like, like, you guys are like not on the same page with things, you know? It's like, oh, so. Yeah, you know, so like part of me, it's like, you know,

I guess part of that's true. I guess part of that's true. Yeah. There's, there's like not a specific catalyst for this like it's been going on since before we got married actually that's because there's like blurred lines between business and family and marriage and things like that and like knowing ben affleck and like i manage like the entire house plus i work and sometimes i just like feel like that i'm just taken for granted like where it's like normal like i just like this lady who just like does everything for these people all the time yeah and like i get really sad. And like when I get really sad, I like have to go to my car and put on a cowboy hat, my denim dress. That's what I'm wearing right now. I don't know why. Do you know why? Does anybody

know why? But I go sit in my car and I call my dad and I'm like, dad, this is hard. This is hard. Hold on, dad. Let me open the window. And you know what? It's like sad. I have to call my dad to do that instead of John. That's so hard. John's like, well, we aren't on the same page because I don't think you want to hear what I have to say because you're already thinking. Yeah, well, like, you know what? Like same pages like me, like books. I don't like that, John. You know, I don't like reading books, John. You know, like I'm just frustrated, John. I'm just frustrated. I guess what I want to hear what you have to say, John. I want to hear what you have to say. What's like really on my heart is the following sentence. Yeah, I know. That's on my heart too. Me too, John. That's what I'm saying. I just. Yeah, I think that like, if I have to like, like, like I was saying,

here's how I really, here's how I really remember when I took nine things on it, remember when I took nine suitcases on the yacht? That was hilarious. Yeah, well, I guess you don't really. Yeah, Joseph Smith knows better. I wish I could call Joseph Smith right now. He listens to me more than Utah. Yeah.

Everything you do is perfect. It's just me. I'm the problem. It's me. See, finally inroads with our communication. Oh, geez. Here comes one right now. So now we go to Angie's house and Mary's coming over and it's really awkward.

And he's like, hello, Mary. And she's like, hi. Well, you decided to open the door for me this time. And usually I have to let myself in because you're too busy to get the door. So thank you for getting the door. Well, I brought you your favorite drink, Arizona iced tea, Baklava flavor. But they didn't have the one. with no sugar.

Yeah, this is like seven cups of sugar. Don't even drink that for yourself, please. I mean, just get this away from me. All right, Mary. You want to look nice. You look nice. You look almost Greek. You look so nice.

Thank you. You want water. Thank you. You want Greek water. No. This is water from Greek. No. It's water.

Listen, I just stopped. I just stopped by to talk. Okay, I don't want your water. I want your liquids. Okay, just talk to me. I don't want liquid things in my mouth from you. Before we do that, of course, I had to make a snack. Here's a giant snack for us.

Here's a snack. Do you want the snack? The snack. I'll eat that. I don't want that. I don't want to eat that. No, I'm not going to do it. I feel like I'm in the principal's office.

It's like Principal Zeus is here and he's scolding me and I know what it feels like because I was a regular, but this time I'm actually feeling a little bit scared. Mary's just looking at her like, you. Like with complete this taste on her face. She's like, you know, why am I even here? It's disgusting. Okay, Mary, I just want to say, I am sorry. I know that you wanted me to calm down and I know that you were there and you were trying to help me.

And it's hard for me to allow someone to bully me because I was so bullied by that dusty product. That you're becoming, that you're becoming, that you're becoming, that you're becoming the bully on the playground, that you're becoming. I'm responding. I'm not bullying her. I'm responding to dusty products in my basement. I was bullied by dusty products. Yeah, but you know what? You get so angry that you can't even focus on getting sugar-free, Arizona. Arizona iced tea and then you bring people sugar and I could be dead of diabetes right now because

you get so angry that you can't even focus. And then what am I supposed to do if I can't calm you down? Why am I there? And then you're allowing someone to get mad to the point that it's affecting our friendship and my iced tea. And that's what we have to talk about. And we, you know, it's like I don't even exist. And I'm like, Angie, Angie, and you're just like, ah, eat sugar, eat sugar, eat sugar, eat sugar, put sugar down your throat, put sugar down your throat, you know and like you launched me like i was your enemy that you wanted me to have diabetes right there on the spot i was frustrated with the whole table okay well you're supposed to be my sister you're supposed to be my sister but you're not my sister no you're not finding another one k

because if you were really my sister you would be able to marry my grandpa if i ever died but you're not so good luck good good luck here with your sugar eating muscular husband with louis Vuitton bags. I don't want to be on eggshells and I don't want to note there's not actual eggshells on the floor, Mary. I'm sorry, that was a metaphor, did not mean to spook you. I don't want to feel like you're mad at me for being me. But you're different. You're different lately. You are different. And she says that Angie's kind and easy going and cool, but lately she's always throwing a tantrum. Now, I don't know where Mary was during the other seasons, but

yeah. Angie's thrown tantrums every season. She's like, and that's a trigger. And you don't evolve by attacking other people. It's almost like you go backwards, you know? And I used to know a girl that went backwards. She kept going backwards and backwards. And I would tell her, no, come forward. Communion is forwards. But she kept going backwards and backwards until she walked into the street. And she got run over right in front of the church by a truck that was going forward. It was ironic. And that truck fell into a neighborhood. And that truck died too. She's like, so Mary's like, you know, you're in a space and I don't know who you are. And you're a little bit mean. Like when you made fun of my fart, you can't have to make fun of my fart.

Your fart? My fart. And we see a flashback to this like lunch that Mary Browen and Angie had where Mary farts by accident and then her giggles about it. And then Angie keeps on ragging on her about it. She's like, I guess we'll sit over there away from Mary's farts. Oh, look, there's Elektra. Let me warn her that there's a smell of fart in here from Mary. Well, first of all, the dog farting, not me.

And then you said, oh, maybe that's Mary. And then you said, come on, Bronwyn, we better sit over here because Mary's got gas. And then your dog farts. And then it smelled the whole house up. And then it shows a close up of the dog. And the dog's like, sitting all gorgeously. And then you blamed it on me like it was my fart. And I'm like, first of all, I eat healthy.

Okay? And my farts don't come out like that. And we should know the fart between my fart and a dog fart. And you didn't even know my fart between the dog fart. I mean, what kind of friend are you? Think I just have a dog fart? so now you're just accusing me of having dog farts and I'm just supposed to be your friend

and then you said oh my God Mary is that you? And I'm like okay enough I got it next time I won't tell you when I fart then oh my God I was like at first I thought she was being silly for the cameras but then I was like I think this is a real rant right now because Angie is like

Angie cannot she's like trying not to laugh and what's even worse is that when she tries to not to laugh she puts her fingers out of her nose So it looks like she's trying not to smell Mary. What are you holding my, what are you holding your nose now? Like I farted again. I did not fart. Do not accuse me of farting.

If someone farted, it was you. She's like, I didn't smell your fart, but you acknowledged that you had farted. So that's why I said it. Seriously, like if you farted, I wouldn't make fun of you from farting. And you don't even know if I smelled your fart before. And maybe I have, but I would never talk about it and make fun of you because I'm your friend. But you didn't smell my fart. You didn't smell my fart.

You just said you did. And then you blame me for having a dog fart. And she's like, but I, but you said that you farted. I said, I have gas. Well, so I said, why don't you sit over there? And she goes, well, I was offended by it, okay. So then she's like, okay, I think we have to end this. So she sort of takes her hand and she goes, I appreciate you.

Give me your hand. No, we're not ready. We're not ready. We're not there yet. We're not there yet. I came over here. I almost died of, I almost died of diabetes. I would have had sugar farts then.

Then you could have come at me with sugar farts for this. Sugar, Arizona. There will be a day, Mary, when I won't be here to clutch your hand. Instead, there'll be a different lady here gutting a fish in my backyard. So enjoy this moment. Wideswap, 10.30 tonight. And Mary is like, you know, I, you know, hold on. I don't want to lose you, but you have to understand me too.

Okay, I pull back in certain situations where I feel a level of disrespect or I farted. And finally, I farted around somebody and didn't pull back. And now I have dog farts. So, and she's like, okay. And so Mary talks about how she doesn't let people in. But when she does let people in, you know, she puts you on a pedestal and she wants the best for you and she wants you to thrive. And then she starts crying.

And she's like, I don't know why I'm crying. I'm sorry. I didn't do that. That wasn't me. That was Andy's dog. Why are you crying? Your fart was a little stink. It's kind of making us react.

How dare you accuse me? farting. I live my life with a guardup because I've been dogged with gas, lots of gas from a dog. Dog gas. There's a difference. I don't have this often, farting, that is, but also friendship. This comes into my life every 20 years. And I get a, you know, I get a friend that I love and I feel secure and I feel like I trust

you and I can talk to you and I can tell you stuff. I don't tell people. And Angie is like, if you want to accuse me of having dog farts again, I will unmemorize. you, I will unmemorize you. I like that. I've never heard that threat before. I never heard that either. That was a great. I'll unmemorize your existence. And so Angie's like, I acknowledge you. They actually, it's like, it's a really lovely like moment because Angie's like, I acknowledge you. This is my heart. Like, I've learned from you. I will work better. And I actually feel like this is like what you want from a friend is to be like, I'm mad. I'm so mad at you. But you mean a lot to me.

and I want you to know you're doing things that are really hurting me and that have the other friend hear it and say, I hear it, I'm going to work on it. Like, this was actually a lovely, lovely moment. You know, sometimes I do, oh, go ahead. Sometimes I was just going to say,

I'm a little mixed on when people say, I don't let people in. So when I do let people in, it means a lot. Like, I almost, like, don't want to be held hostage by whatever, like, issues you have with relating to people at the same time, you know? This is separate from their, like, I think it was great how they made up.

And I think it's really lovely that, like, oh, I'm so lucky. Yeah, like, I think it's, I love, I love that Angie respects this about Mary. And I think it's, it's good to respect that. Like, it's, you know, but, but sometimes when people are like, I don't have a lot of friends. So you've been let in. It's like, well, stop using that as leverage in our friendship, you know? Yeah. Well, for me, what was interesting about this is two things.

One, Mary gets, you know, like this, where she's just like, I'm pissed and I'm leaving. And she just gets mad. And it's over things that most people watching are like, huh? Why are you mad at that? Like, even that she got mad at Angie, like, she got mad at Angie for being mad and not listening to her. But then she didn't have like a fight with Angie, you know? Why would you walk off? It seems unreasonable.

It seems like too much. And she's always been like that on the show. And then on the other hand, you have Angie and she won't forgive you either. Mary will take a long time to forgive, which is funny for a preacher. But then Angie, on the other hand, will just go off and go off on anybody. And she also really won't relent for a while. Like if you, if you come for her, she feels like she's being attacked, she goes overboard and just goes crazy and puts her finger in your face and does all that,

brings out props, you know, does the whole thing. So it's interesting to see both Mary kind of forgive someone so quickly and also be so open emotionally. And also to see Angie not get triggered or whatever and start fighting and instead be like, okay, okay, you're right. You know, so it's interesting. It's a cute friendship. well i think that they actually acknowledge they acknowledge that this is a real friendship and that there's something special between them and it's important to um not just treat it as reality

show fodder like if something is wrong if something is broken or if someone's upset they they have to sort of stop everything and be like okay we have to listen to each other and i think that's actually really beautiful i think the whole audience we all pick up on it because like sort of circling back to my thought about how it's it can be kind of frustrating that like someone's issues in life means that they get to have this thing of like, oh, I don't let a lot of people in. So you've been let in. So now

you've got to act a certain way. It can be frustrating. But at the same time, people have issues in their lives. And they do have their guards up. So when you have been let it, and it is kind of special. So it's nice to see Angie is taking that very seriously. And you know it means something because Mary normally, if someone pisses Mary off, she's like, bye. And we've seen it happen a million times. But the fact that she comes back.

and she lets Angie have it, but then she's like, but I love you and I want you in my life. It's a big deal, I think. We haven't really seen Mary do that before. Yeah. So now we go over to Heather and Lisa shopping. Sorry, I'm late. I've never been here.

What is this? Katie Waltman. Katie Waltman, a story called Katie Waltz. I don't know her. Who is that? Yeah, I don't know that. I think that one time I was like supposed to come here, but like my yacht trip was like seven to ten days long.

I just wasn't able to get here in time because I was still on the yacht that was going for 7 to 10 days, yeah. Yeah, it's nice to come to a shop where people who only bring one suitcase on yachts shop. Yeah. That's nice. Yeah, this is great. A one suitcase three-day yacht shop, yeah. Heather, you know about that because you went on below deck before. So this is what it's like when you go on your three-day charters.

Yeah, it's so fun for you, yeah. So Heather's like, wow, you look fresh and fabulous. Is everything okay, sister? She's like, I'm great. Yeah, so excited. We get to use our passports. We're going on a super yacht. I mean, can I take requests?

Like, come on. Like, can I bring glam? She's like, no, you cannot bring glam. And then we have a flashback to, we're talking about, I've glab in Monaco. I've glenn in Central Bay. I've glab everywhere I go. Oh my gosh.

So you're going to have to help me with my makeup every day, Heather. She's like, well, no. I'll have Whitney help you because this is a sisterhood. And each one of us will pick up a makeup brush and we'll do all of our faces all together as a group. Because that's what we do for our sisters. I'll pass. If Whitney's going to do it, I'll pass. I'll pass. Oh, then Angie can blow out your hair. I'd pass. Hard pass.

You don't trust her with your hair? I don't trust her with anything. I don't trust her with anything. She'll probably hope that my son dies while they get my hair done. Yeah. Well, she's coming for my son. She's coming on the trip. So you have to be ready, Lisa. Yeah, well, that'll be nice for Angie since she's never been on a luxury

trip like that or on a yacht either. She's never even been on a yacht per Angie. So that'll be cool. It'll be her first experience on a nice boat. Yeah. I'm not gonna haze Angie as much as you two keep hazing each other. I'm sick of her attacks. You know what? She's getting high off of that. She can get high off of it all

how she wants to. I'm getting a high here just being in, I'm sorry, what's this store again? Whatever this Walmart is, the poor person, Phil. I'm getting high on it. I did not see Angie get high off of the air attacks. This is a sisterhood. We are here to support each other. She was crying. She was upset.

To me, I was like, she was poor. Is she crying because she's a mean bitch? Like, why she's crying? Why? Because she doesn't have money in her purse? That's probably why. Like, why does she, do you think she feels bad about being a mean batch? Yeah. If you, if you can't even understand why she's crying, it's obvious because she opened up the New York Times and did not have a best.

seller book like I did. Of course she's crying. Okay, look, Lisa, if she's a mean bitch, you're a mean bitch. You're both mean bitches. You know what? What did I do wrong? What did I do wrong, though? Because on my opinion, my opinion, Andy shouldn't have been starting being nasty about my kid's brand, you know, like, that's disgusting. That is disgusting. No, I know that was hurtful. As hurtful as it probably was for all of you guys to not be called bestsellers. Yeah, but then she goes lower and lower, like, hey, you want to call me a cup fitness? I'm going to say it louder. I'm, yes, yes, I did say cup fitness lady with the semi-crossed eyes looking at me funnily. Who is that lady looking at me funny? What did you just come in here from the, from a compound?

Who are you? What are you looking at? Like, I just work here, ma'am. Yeah, we'll keep working. Keep working. Gene Folder, okay? Yeah, I'm just like sick of her nasty, nasty dig. She's always commenting, oh! Well, I think she's sick of your digs, too. But I didn't dig it. Are you kidding me? What are you saying that you, what you're saying that you hate about Angie is exactly what you did? How is that what you're doing? How was what you're doing different? It's almost like Bravo needs a spinoff called surviving Barlow, which would be a spinoff of my spinoff, surviving Mormonism, which I'm hosting Lisa. Well, how did I go low? How did I go low? How did I go low? How did I go low? How did I go low? How did I go low? The soup man? Who's the Superman? Did you survive it? Yeah, but she just said I cheated on my husband, though.

So I'm like, I don't know. Why don't you worry about your suit man? So is it suit man or soup man? Sue. Sue. Sue. That soup? Sue.

Or is it suit? It's Sue. Like soup chef? Sue. Sue. Sue? Sue. Sue.

Sue. Oh, is he a Native American Sue of the Sioux tribe? Sue. Sue. Sue. Sue. Sue. So, like you mean Fuda, like John Fuda from New Jersey?

No, no, there he is, by the way. Shout out, there he is. No, but like a guy from a suit, a kitchen, you know, like not a suit you wear, but like a, not like a Morocco suit you wear, like not like a suit you eat. Oh, a suit you wear, like a lawsuit, like the ones that you have against you? Is that what you're talking about? Yes, so, a suit, yeah, dismissed. Yeah, she'd say to get dismissed, man.

Is that what you're saying? Dismissed. Those were dismissed. Just learning that suit man is actually suit man clears a lot of things up. First of all, he sounds hotter. Heather, just earning those checks. So she's like, wait a minute, who's the suit man? Nobody.

Oh, you know what? And why does she say it cheated on my husband then? Then why did she say that? And she goes, but wait, but why would you say that? So look, you got to have Lisa credit. is being an asshole in the scene and she's being an asshole usually but lisa is not going there with suit man we talked about on crappy hour his suit man could possibly be that lady sophia from uh who used to be a host on caller daddy claims that uh angie was dating her ex who they call suit man um who's some

guy who graduated with a degree in greek studies or something so that's kind of the goss on that just the internet gossip on that but she doesn't go there she's just like nobody So maybe she's saving it for later. I don't know. But then she says, but then why did she say you cheated on your husband? Whitney was the one who brought. Wasn't it Whitney who brought that up with, no, wait. Who's cheating on the husband?

Would Monica and Whitney were like, we know something about the husband? Don't talk about the husband. That was Sean, right? God, that's so many petty arguments ago. Because, well, Meredith said, let's talk about my husband. She had that. But then they had that Lisa Barlow event, that Vita event or whatever, where Whitney and Monica pulled over Angie. And Whitney's like, I think you should tell her.

And then remember when she kind of manipulated Monica into being the one to out this information so they could all be like, Monica's the one who did it. And Monica was like, well, yeah, I heard your husband is gay. Everybody's saying your husband is gay or whatever. So she's the one who brought that to camera with Whitney. But of course, Lisa, Lisa has no chill. And it's so easy to blame Lisa for things because she never fights properly. And so they could just blame everything on Lisa. And that's what they're going to do.

Mm-hmm. So Heather's like, well, there is no suit man. And there's no suit man. She's just throwing shit out and seeing, waiting to see what sticks. I mean, look, there's a, there's a, there's a reason that no one ever writes hard for you, Lisa. And I think it's because they've all been burned by you when everyone at the table has a history with you. Where have you got you've gotten low before, Lisa? Okay, okay.

Well, maybe I shouldn't go on the boat trip that. Maybe you got, I'm putting on my sunglasses now. So you can't see me cry. You have to acknowledge that we have come a long way that our history is dark. It is Lisa. You know what? Dark, dark history. You know what?

You should talk to Angie about it because she's more than willing to talk to yo about it. You know, you should talk to her in the dark about it with so. I actually have. I have. I have talked to her about it. Oh, now you talk to Angie about it. Great. You don't need to get upset, Lisa.

Yeah. I really did not think I was coming here today. I thought I was going to come here to look at poor people clothes with that cross-eyed girl over there giving me judgey looks. I still see you cross-eyed girl. But your mother, your sister, stop staring at me. Well, listen, what am I even saying to you other than that we have history? We are like two pods in the same drawer for my coffee machine. in it together we're in it we're stuck in it oh so why are you acting like this oh really i'm just

a low forward i'm just as low i'm just as low i'm just as low i'm just as low yeah you cannot expect me to just sit here and let you dis her and be like outy five thousand and say that she does all these horrible things horrible things and not look at you and say you do too what you two are doing has no end point. You are like Mormonism and people need to survive you. I hope there's a special about it that I can host. Yeah, you know what, Ben? Then stop talking about me and then I won't have anything to say about her. Okay? Don't count my money because I don't count hers. You know, not that it's not hard to count because she has like $2 because I counted that. Yeah. That would be so easy to count her money because she doesn't have any money. Yeah. Lisa, Lisa, when you say something

like I could count her money, it'd really be fucking easy. You might as well count her fucking money. because you're not saying it in a way that makes you cooler or kinder. You're saying it exactly low. Like she would say, do you understand this, Lisa? Yeah, but why can poor people start it, but rich people can't say anything back or we're like in the 1% where it's like you want to burn us all? You know what I mean? Like, I'm sorry that I have a job, okay?

Oh my gosh, the nerve of her to say this right now? Like in this poor person store that like is for like three-day yacht trips? Like Heather, are you fucking blind in death? Because clearly, you don't see all the times everyone's coming from me nonstop and it's hard with you. And I wish I had something that would go for the deaf thing too because I said you don't see the things. But I'm just going to assume you're not hearing the things too. Okay, that's my metaphor. So we see, you know, basically we see a flashback to where it all began where Heather's like,

how could you call me a good time, girl? That could have got me suspended from school. Surviving Good Time Girlism by Heather Gay. So Lisa's like, like, you know how much I've put up with Heather? Like, you know, and I'm like, glad? I'm like, I could give you your book a title, by the way. Like, this is like bullshit. Yeah, I came up with the title, remember?

Because she does, she does have a title called Good Time Girls. I mean, Good Time Girl. You got to be careful. When you make fun of people on these shows, they take it over. Like, Luann took Giovanni. Paige and Hannah took Gigli Squad from Kyle. Yeah, you need to trademark your insults on your shows. You need to be like Dorinda and just run trademarks on everything you say.

Yeah. Yeah, don't let those disses fall at the wrong hand. Yeah, but you know what? She doesn't want anyone to say anything back to her. She doesn't. It's a Britney. Oh, wait, no one cares about Brittany, Lisa. What are you even bringing her up?

I mean, you said so many things back to her. She's like, you know what? I didn't say so many nasty things back to her. She called me a cut fitness. And I'm like, you know what? Thank you. Okay. Roll call.

I'm here. cross-eyed salesperson. I said cut fitness again. Okay? That poor 16-year-old girl with the big curly hair and she's just like looking left and right, like, am I going to outer darkness by hearing these words? I'm not saying this to hurt you or this poor sweet girl who is sort of my daughter's age. I almost wish you would get out of the store so I could live my life. But anyway, you know, but I'm not trying to drudge it up. I'm just saying it so that you can see that it's never going to stop unless we acknowledge it and I say and I say it to you, you know, I want to get this off

my chest too because the most important thing is to have you at peak emotional frustration or frustration before we get on a boat and you can't escape. You know what? Like, I'm like sick of being labeled like this. Like, you don't feel bad. Like, I think she needs to take accountability. And I told her, I'm like, I just want to get, I just want to get my kid's product. I was just trying to be that nice, nice that day that I set my assistant to wear dusty store,

with two dollars it was like in the parking lot it was like under an umbrella like it was like the worst store i've ever seen in my life like there were there were like a bunch of bald people in there because she like does hair so bad you know i was just like trying to be nice Lisa you're not gonna win i've already won i've got to spin off in the book you're not going to win you want to win something she wants to win something and you're both losing i'm trying to move forward with you right now with the stuff that i'm using to bring us backwards and i'm hoping that this trip will help us bring us all together the way so many of our trips always have traditionally on our show if there's anything about a real housewives of salt lake city trip is that it brings us closer and we

emerge more maturely but like until you really clear it up or change it it's never going to go away Lisa oh my god Lisa's just like well so one thing I have to say oh sorry no good I don't have to say No, I was about to transition into the next scene. And if you were about to say something at this scene, I didn't want to stomp on it. No, it's going to be the same thing. Well, I was going to say if there's one thing that the real house has a Salt Lake City is known for is chaos and hilarity. But if there's one thing that's become really good at, a riveting mother-daughter scenes. Because guess what?

Here comes another one that I was not expecting. This is worse than I thought it could be. Oh, my gosh. This Brittany situation is I have to. to say. I mean, you know, I'm really judgy on this show and I get it. Like, I'm judgy and bitchy and mean sometimes and stuff like that. But I do try in my head to give people the benefit of the doubt. And I remember saying last week with Brittany with this whole thing, people coming after, you know, Whitney's saying, no, you need to go, you need to stop dating him for 30 days and prove to your daughter.

And I was like, well, but did the daughter even ask for that? Like, is that really the problem? Like, what is the problem? Because it's never really been explained to Brittany. said in the past, you know, I've chosen men over my daughter. Okay, well, that's a bad enough confession, right? So it's not like I think Britney's so innocent, but wow, it's a lot worse than even I thought it could be. It's bad. It's bad and it's sad because what it, to me, what it shows is, well, I don't have any sympathy for Brittany in this situation. She really fucked up. No, me neither. And I'm not saying you do. But what I will say is that it makes, I do feel sad for her as a person, she she's kind of a broken person right like what we really do see is that like when that first marriage

ended it clearly something sweet like i i think she like couldn't deal she clearly had to like excise that part of her life and just like poured herself into a new life that she's been trying trying to chase this stuff but like this lady needs she needs help she really does and it's it's it's really sad to see someone cause that much damage on her poor daughter because her own her own it's kind of broken at the moment, you know? Yeah, I don't even see the like she needs help thing. I look at it as kind of like you can't really help a narcissist sometimes because she doesn't even seem to get it.

Like she never really gets it. She can never really explain it. I mean, let's go on with it, you know, for people who actually need a recap of it. But they, so first of all, I want to say, thank God for traumatic parents because they do raise great theater kids because this kid, Olivia, is clear. clearly a theater child. I mean, she comes in, she has the charisma of one, she has the outfit of one, and she definitely has the voice of one. She's like, hello, mother. It's like a living room play projected to the balcony, you know? It really is. And by the way, something that is, I think, also worth noting is that this mother-daughter scene that is going to be very riveting and intense is going to play out at sort of like the high top counter on the side of a coffee shop, like lots of people just on their laptops. it's like and they're going to want and they will wind up like the daughters their voices will be raised

there will be tears and i'm like i cannot believe you guys are doing it you're not even sitting at a proper table like they're sitting at that little side thing like which you guys couldn't even get a table like oh my gosh so it seems okay at first they hug it's nice and brittany well it's not really because she's the kid walks in and she's like hello mother and she's like oh hi Hey, hug. You want a hug? She's like, um, okay. So she lets her hug her.

Well, meaning it's, it starts off nicer than where it ends. Yeah. It's, it's, it's, it's, there's still, there are smiles that are present. Um, so Brittany is explaining that her reading with Terrence, um, was like prophetic. It made her realize that she needs to step back from her romantic relationship to focus on what's really important, which is her daughter. Um, is that prophetic or is it just like last? That's not what a prophet. the most recent person to tell you that.

Or is it just something that's obvious and happening in current times? Even Whitney could tell you to do that. She did. But you didn't notice because you were distracted by the pain you were inflicting on yourself by stroking a cactus. Trotting a cactus. So Britney's like, well, so, honey, I got you a steamer.

Do you get it? No. I was like a steamer. No. You know what I'm talking about? No. No, I don't know what a steamer is. Remember when you were four?

You threw that tantrum, you said, I didn't get any coffee. But like, really? Because, like, I used to buy steamers, remember? And that's why you call coffee. Remember that, honey? You don't remember this? Mom, I was four. I was four.

Don't worry. I videotaped the whole thing. Because, you know, math. I know you love math, too. Remember the video I sent you about your math test? Oh, God. Here it is. Oh, I can't find it, honey.

It's in here somewhere. So she's like, well, we were in Starbucks, and you would kick and you would scream. And I'm not kidding you. screaming at the top of your lungs. I want coffee. And everyone would look at me like, what kind of mother are you? You give your child coffee?

So, no, I didn't get you coffee. I would get you steamers instead. That was, still don't get it, huh? Don't remember? Nope, still don't remember. That's pretty funny, though, mom. Funny story. Yeah, that was.

This is, like, this is, you're going to connect with something from her when she was four years old. Also, I just feel like reconciliation talk should never start with, like, banter about steamers. I just feel like the word steamer does not really work with reconciliation. I don't know why. I think we already had a lot of talk about farts. Now we're talking about steamers. I think let's just like move on to like different words. Yeah. So she's like, that's funny. She goes, okay, well, she tells us that with her daughter, she got divorced from their dad. She desperately tried to create a perfect happy family. So she married again immediately.

But she was caught in this tug of war between husband and children. And she was caught in this tug of war between husband and children and she thought wow i can finally get to my kids when i'm a good enough wife and then eventually her kids moved in with her dad i don't believe wow i believe she was like oh no that that situation was a failure but i've got a new guy now and this will be perfect so goodbye old life hello new life i'm the new brittany now i that's what i think probably happened or like the man left me so I need to make sure that the man doesn't leave me you know so I need to give maybe I was too focused on the kids and now I need to focus on the man because the man left me because I was you know I didn't even notice what the man was doing behind my back because he you know blah blah so I'm going to keep the man this time it's like putting the man above your kids I mean which she says multiple times but it's crazy to hear this yeah and this happens a lot I mean obviously a lot of a lot of kids have issues with their set parents because a lot of times they're You know, they, they feel like their parents have kind of abandoned them to focus on this new person. It's a, it's a, it's a tricky thing to do that it sounds like Brittany utterly failed at.

So sounds like she didn't even try. She was just like, I'll get to the kids later. I'm just going to focus on the man now and to the point where they moved in with her dad. She's just like, bye. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I think that would Brittany, saying that she was like, I figured if I was a really good wife, I could then get to get to my kids.

I was like, no, I don't think you're adding this like little like, twist to it to make it seem like actually the ignoring Olivia and the kids was somehow virtuous. Like, you were on a path of misguided virtue. I don't think it was that. I think you just were, like, scared that you were going to be left, and I think it's what you said.

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