Watch What Crappens - #3050 RHOC S19E16 Part One: Watch Your Tulip

Episode Date: October 24, 2025

This is part 1 of 2The Real Housewives of Orange County struggle for stuff to argue over in Amsterdam, but they find a way because they’re pros. Gretchen has some sort of breakdown, but it might be because her Instagram likes are coming to the surface. Watch your tulips, girl. You’re in troubs. You can watch this recap on video, listen to our bonus episodes, and participate in live episode threads at patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens.  See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wondry Plus subscribers can listen to Watcher Crappins ad free right now. Join Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts. Hello and welcome to Wattled Crimmons. I'm Ronnie, that's Ben over there. Hello, Ben. Hi Ronnie, what's going on? Nothing. Welcome everybody to Real Housewives of Orange County Day.

It's a glorious, glorious day for us. We hope it is for you as well. If you want these on videos, you find them at Patreon. Crapping's on demand, okay? That's on Patreon. All our recamps are videos. Go get them there. And you also get bonuses over there.

That's fun. Monday, we're going to be doing an Amazon Live for those of you who like to shop on Amazon, for those of you don't, don't watch it, okay? But for the rest of you, watch it. It's going to be so fun. We do them every other Monday, 4 p.m. Pacific Time over on Amazon Live. You can get links in our link in bio on Instagram, okay? So go check that out.

And Ben, tell me everything. What's going on with you? Wow. How's a trick? Well, yeah, things are tricks are good. really enjoying this chaotic Orange County Amsterdam trip. I am really bracing for next week. I think it's going to be, I think it's going to be a next one.

Not a rough one. I think it's going to be a rough one for us, Bravo people, because I think that people are going to be angry. And I think it's going to be, I think it's be a wild time next Thursday in Orange County land and Internet land. So I'm getting ready for it. How are you doing? Good.

I'm good. My niece and sister has stolen town, so I went to another concert with them last night. Their concert heads. I don't know what you call that. They like going to a lot of concerts. So last night I went to see Aidan Besat. He was so cute. His name is Aidan Beset, some singer. Is he related to Jacqueline? That's exactly what I thought.

I was like, I'll go see a Bissette. Unfortunately, he did not have the 80s, you know, haircut, soap off her haircut, which I needed. But, you know, it was cute. Lots of screaming. There's lots of screaming girls. You know how it goes. I'm about to say that he played against all odds. That would be perfect.

Wasn't she in there? No, but I felt, you know, it was like an old feeling. I was just like some creepy guy. I was like, this is standing room? Don't you have any chairs? I ask the guy, can I sit over there? He's like, that's for ADA. I was like, can I just fake it?

Like half of those chairs are empty. Come on. My back hurts. I'm old. Does that count for anything? But it didn't. So I just found every place to lean in the Fonda Theater that I could possibly find to lean. You should have been like, hey, hey, excuse me, I played here before.

Can I just go back to tape and sit on one of those sofas? I totally would have pulled that card. And it would have failed immensely. I don't think they cared that we played there before. I was leaning on the bar. Then I went to lean on a standing room, you know, anywhere there was to lean, I was leaning on. And then I realized, oh, there's a smoking section. I can sit on the curb of the smoking section.

So I went out there and did that for a while. Talk to some lovely kids from England. Pretty cute. They love a beset. And then I came home and watched Orange County. And I was like, holy, mother of canoles. Where the trans, the anti-translikes are coming in, people. They're coming in.

I really did not think this was going to actually be part of the season. And I think that like all season long, people have been giving Heather shit. like, oh, Heather, just being, you know, buddy, buddy with Gretchen, Heather, who has a trans child as being buddy, buddy with Gretchen, who liked all sorts of problematic social media posts about that stuff. And I thought it was just like something that was on our, like our side of the show, as in like on the internet, but not on the show. And to see that that's where it's actually headed for the finale and watching Heather yell at Gretchen, I was like, oh, my God, this is, this is going to be, this is going to be a wild one and i was also so mad by that button here's why i'm mad about that

button because you know that in the ongoing wars of gretchen and tamra the wars of attrition i honestly was like well we're going to get to it but i have a lot of opinions but but my my my my overriding opinion before we headed into that final segment with gina sitting in a hotel room going i feel mad i feel me was i know me yeah i know this stuff i've been sitting not for three weeks and I've decided I'm not going to say anything until like it's like appropriate now on this trip but um is that like gosh tamara is so good at at her bullshit like it's crazy Tamara doing like Gretchen has this petty stupid moment with the boy band stuff right where she says that Tamara had an affair it was it was Gretchen should not have done it they just broke her to peace this was bad on on Gretchen bad Gretchen she was wrong we all agrees she was wrong for doing this and she blatantly lied her credibility's in the toilet but then tamera has been running with it and being like this is what she's been doing to me for draft yes how am i even supposed to forgive i can't even listen to i can't what's this bullshit it's a facade

just presentational you're the one who started all this in the beginning like tamra started all of this 12 years ago did you get in the back like you was a guy called me up late at night and said you were you were you were cheating on death with him like all the way back then Tamara has been tormenting Gretchen and then Tamara now takes those little inch and now has been just using it and now she is going to she is going to triumph once again yeah well Gretchen fucking deserves it you know sometimes you just you don't really care which which gets hit by the house at some point it's just like they got one you know well I guess what I was you have to take what you can get I guess I guess I guess I guess I was saying is I was upset because I was going to get all righteous about that and be like this is classic

Tamara. I'm like, yeah, Gretchen, Gretchen has all sorts of issues with the truth. But in this case, Tamara's bullshit. And I'm a little bit more on Team Gretchen. And then, of course, they come in with this last segment. And you're like, well, no, I guess I'm not, I guess I'm not team Gretchen after all. I forgot about that part. Well, yeah. I mean, already went off on Gretchen earlier this season about this stuff. And I, I too am shocked that they're bringing it on the show. Because I was going off thinking, oh, they've never bring this on the show. And, but I'm not going to be tricked into liking Gretchen after some of those hateful, that hateful bullshit she has online you know so it's not so much liking gretchen it's more like i sort of do like a separation of

church and state when it comes to watching the housewives sometimes where it's like there's the bullshit the problematic bullshit that they get into off camera and then there's the bullshit they get to on into on camera and i try to kind of just be like this is just i'm gonna just like go with what the show is presenting to me as just like a viewer i try don't always succeed but now it's like oh that bullshit off camera is on the show so it's like it can't really you know turn a blind eye Yeah. I just get mad when it comes out, you know, because I'm different. I read a lot more of this crap online too. I'm a lot more obsessed with that stuff than you are in general. I'm just that kind of person. So I'm already, I've already been pissed. So I'm like, oh my God, what are we watching last season? You know, because I've like calmed down a little bit because I've already gotten so pissed. So I'm like, what is this a repeat? But no, it's not. It's fresh. So let's get in. And, you know, and it came into time also where the show is really just struggling. I mean, at this point, they have nothing to fight about they are trying emily and gina are just working over time trying to start fights every two seconds they're so stupid they're so misplaced these two need to get a life you know

and so the whole episode i'm just so frustrated with gina and emily like you guys are killing this show just relax and let things happen naturally and if it's not a fight then it'll be something else entertaining but you don't have to try so hard it's so fucking frustrating and then boom you know this is how that ends so i guess that's That'll take us through to the rest of the season. So I don't know. I think it's a mix of a lot of things. It's, A, don't piss off Tamara because you know she's had that in her.

She's had that in her arsenal for a while. All of them have had this in their arsenal for a while. It's not like just a few people were reading it on Instagram. This has been all over the place for a long time. So, you know, I think it's a mixture of that. And the producers being like, we've got nothing. All right, bring it out. Bring out the tweets.

Dun, done, done. Because they ran Katie off the show. they ran their central storyline off the show and now they are just kind of like they're just kind of like they're trying to treading water like let's see if we can get like let's see if we can get a Shannon and Tamara feud to go but that one really hasn't quite it just hasn't taken off I mean Shannon is I don't know what's going on with Shannon this season she's like a little in her own box doing wacky things and she's not really she's not really popping and it's just crazy because she had such a strong season last year and she has such a strong season on love love hotel

coming into the season. And then this season happened. And she's just sort of kind of flopping a bit, which is shocking for Shannon. And they just, yeah, they're not. I blame Emily and Gina. I think they kind of ruined the season. I find that to be easier.

You know, the same thing happens on tax day. It's time to pay the taxes. I blame Emily and Gina. You know, it's time to get on the scale and see, you know, see what my sins are for the week. I blame Emily and Gina. I just blame Emily and Gina. But get a, get a nail on my tire.

It's Emily and Gina. I feel really actually. I actually really do blame Emily for a lot of the downfall of this season because I do think that she was really very, very focused on getting Katie out from the very beginning. She was, she was problematically focused on it, I think. And then when she did, then there was a vacuum in the storyline. I mean, everything just kind of collapsed.

And so I've enjoyed it. I've actually really enjoyed it even after Katie's been gone. But like, you can't deny that a lot of the momentum that was so compelling about the season kind of just like went away. And now we just have this. Now we have Emily and Gina. Okay, I know we got started. You keep on trying to start the podcast and I keep on going into like chit chat about it.

But let's start. Let's start the recap. Okay, here we go. Day two of Amsterdam. Time to put her makeup on. Shannon's room is a hellhole, of course. And it's just a wacky Shannon scene, you know, while she talks about how she was so high.

Well, I don't know the level of highness, but I'm definitely still feeling the effects of space cake. And it's like, look at this. I don't know how to open a window anymore. Do I crank it? Do I push it by? Is there a button? Do I pull a rope? Do I talk to it in hispanio?

Open down a window. So, Shadden, you were really, that hashish really affected you. Oh, no, that was fine. Just all those carbs. It's just I don't really know what to do with myself. It was a lot taken one night. Wow. This is croissant high.

And then she's trying to put on iPad. She's like, do these go on my nose? I don't even remember where an iPad goes. I put them over my eyes. I can't see. I can't see. I put under iPads on my eyeballs. Boom.

I just falling down. I just want to. A house facade falls over her. She's like Buster Keaton now. Yeah. I will say that a lot of people are saying like it's maybe time for Shannon to go, no. I think we've watched Shannon's arcs well enough to know that she usually has some tragically awful season and then she has her overcompensating. I'm actually a really fun lady season and then she settles back into paranoia and tragedy.

So I think next season she'll be fine. I want to see Shannon at the end of the world. Okay. I want it to be like 50 years later and see Shannon, you know, and some decrepit home. I don't even care if she can't walk, speak, whatever. I just need her there. I need to see Shannon until the last breath, okay? Yeah, I get so mad when people say it's time for Shannon to go.

I'm like, how dare you? You don't even understand. Like, yes, she's sort of having a non-compelling season, but this is a woman who gives and gives and gives. And when she, like, she's just trying to be a happy-go-lucky person this season. I'm telling you it will go away and she will go back to being a lunatic. It's going to be wonderful. Yeah, you just got to be patient.

It's like an orchid. They look like they're dead, but they just come back sometimes. I keep telling myself that. But one of my friends, Stephanie, texts me all the time. And she's like, I can't believe you are standing up for Shannon. I'm so sick of Shannon. How could you stick up for her? She's crazy.

And I just write back, yes. She's a drunk. Yes. She's a mess. Yes. Like, yes. You're exactly, you know, you're laying out why I love the woman. Okay.

Yeah. Also, I'm like, I will. Can't stop one stop and I will never ever forgive Bravo if they ever get rid of Shannon before they get rid of Emily and or Gina like if that happens something is really wrong over that network okay because that that would be a travesty so you know this has nothing to do with anything and I'm sorry it won't take long everybody but I was watching the seminal film K-pop demon hunters yesterday because I or a couple days ago because I had to show my niece from sister because i loved it i just loved it yeah it's one of my favorite things of all times loved

it so i was showing it to them and of course they were totally blasé they're like whatever great thanks i noticed that at the very end i was reading the credits because that's how much i love it i was like reading the credits of k-pop demon hunters um Alex baskin is a producer on k-pop demon hunters yeah he's everywhere wow he's set for life now i mean he was already set for life but now he's how wow wow does no he's already set for life he's a well there be a he's an actual baskin robin's kid you know that's true he is actually a bat like he's a nepo he's a yeah he's a delicious nepo baby what a what a 30s flavor 31 flavored nepo baby but yeah he's a producer of this show for those of you who don't know but yeah that was crazy um okay

so uh is that Alex baskin k pop demon hunters what are you looking at Right. Yeah, I just want to know. You have to. There's a red. There's actually a whole Reddit thread. I do have kind of illusional thinking where I'll, you know, I remember things incorrectly. It's important to Google me. I'm not offended. Oh, wait. Wait. Is it a different Alex Baskin? Well, you know, Reddit has all the answers. So there is a thread about this from a month ago. Oh, my God, Ronnie, you're so late. Banner Pump and K-pop Demon Hunter connection question mark. So a user says, so I was rewatching K-pop Demon Hunter for the million times. And when the credits rolled, I saw a familiar name. Alex Baskin is a production manager for that movie. Well, that's production manager. Oh, production manager.

That's different. I just saw Alex Baskin. I didn't actually rewind it. Someone else saw it too. And it turns out there was two Alex Baskins. Oh. Sorry. Well, actually, I'm glad you Googled it because you see, I would have next, you know,

I would have maybe seen him in BravoCon and been like, oh my God, your best work ever, K-pop demon hunters. Amazing. I mean, it would have been like, that's not me, but thanks for dissing everything else I've ever done. Yeah. Okay, everybody, false alarm. Let's go back to the regularly scheduled program. I was trying to come up with a pun for K-pop Demon Hunters.

That's somehow, like, related to, like, Real House wasn't about what he else. I just couldn't do it. Kyle, like, trans hate tweet demon hunters. Here we are. We're back. That's us. So Emily, it's like wacky makeup session. And we go see what Emily and Gina are doing to get.

ready. And Gina's like, you have a Q-tob. And I'm like, no, I won't give you a Q-tub. So, you know, they're earning their money as well. At least you got Shannon doing tricks over there, putting under iPads on our eyeballs. What are you two doing? Yeah. Your Q-tip comedy. Fuck out of here. So people are meeting in the lobby and complimenting each other. And Gretchen tells Heather, she looks pretty. And Heather tells Gretchen, she's pretty. And she's like, Juliet Barbie. Jen, you look like tulip Barbie Barbie, because you look like a Barbie doll. But you also look appropriate for visiting a tulip. I have never been to a tulip field.

Like, well, okay. That was expository information, Alfredo. Please. Can we have a location, a location anywhere you want? Okay, mall, no, that doesn't work. grocery store no no that doesn't work bus station no thank you we're looking for tulip field just say tulip field thank you okay i have never been to a tulip field blumch thank you

groundling strained alfredo it's not as good when i have to do the badumptcha okay stick with it i need to get that but umcha on my side too uh i'll send it's very stressful trying to plan the bad um with you. I like to add the bedumcha in sort of like with bad timing too because I feel like that's probably what it would be like would be Alfredo like because Alfredo is also cleaning the windows and she's like, get down from there, but dumps me. Okay, back to the Bidumcha me.

So Shannon, Shannon comes down barefoot and Heather's like, why are we walking barefoot in foreign lands. And Shannon has hurt her toe. She's like, my, I step my toes and my, my shoe is too tight. And then I tried to, tried to wear the hotel phone

as my shoe. And then I started ringing in the elevator. Hi. Hi there. Can you, uh, can you tell your man to do the, to do the thing? No. No, you have not trained for comedy. So therefore, you will just have to make your own jokes and make your little sound effects. I'm sorry.

There are no but um, just for non-comedia. I'm sorry. Sorry, you have to be accepted into the groundlings in order to have a badump show. Thank you. I was so excited not to travel with toddlers anymore. And then I met Shannon. It's time for a commercial.

It's time for a crappence commercial. Okay, Alfredo, we're back. I appreciate that. Thank you. So she's brought mushrooms because, you know, she's still really groovy, Heather, guys. She's super cool and she has a sexy room with her husband in case you didn't know. Whole penthouse sweet. Just have sexy time with Mama Elsa face Terry.

And she also does, like, fun drugs. So she's got mushrooms, guys. She's like, chat she BT says we need three to four grams each. And then at four grams, that is the amount of grams that you need to have a fun time. Because I am a fun mom. Fun Heather Debrough is here. Remember my sleepover when we all had very distinct things that we had to do. And then we woke up and someone cooked us plain eggs.

That was so fun, everyone. I am fun this season. What do you even ask ChatGBT, BT? Like, how many shrooms does my mom need to feel cool? Yeah. Chat Chb2 will be like, great question. I love that. Most people recommend four grams, but really it's up to you.

Any other questions? Four grams should work, plus a sexy room. And, you know, what else was her? But else did I just say what's her thing? My sexy room, my weed. My weed, my marriage won. So, oh, in a groundlings class. So, Shanna's like, how many grams of mushrooms do I need to make my mom feel cool?

Make my mom feel cool. I'm just asking AI right now. And AI says, I was supposed to use that. You're going to get. trouble okay well of course i want to help you cook something i'd be you already wasted the water so just tell me the answer i'd be happy to help you cook something with mushrooms for your mom that's that's actually like heather bro is doing AI right now oh you'd like to use mushrooms shall we make a risotto and jean is like oh hannah is the mom

hether's the lady that my mom warned me about in high school and no one was those So, Gene is super cool, too. So they take shrooms, guys. And Heather's like, apparently when you take these shrooms, colors are more vibrant. So what better time to take them than seeing two of a, you want to see a vibrant color? Look at my toe. It's blue. I think it's blue.

It's talking to me. My toe is talking to me. And it's saying, ow. Ow! Wait, what is that saying? David? Huh? Here lies Shannon Bedore's toe.

killed by a sandal that looked a lot like that slut on the beach so they get into separate vans because it's housewives so we got to talk shit about each other in each van and Jen and Shannon are in one talking about Shannon's

boobs and how big they look and Shannon's like oh it's called a falsely bra I think that's what it's called a falsely bra it hides the fat in your back can you see any fat in my back I can't so that's the important important part. I love sphinx. I just, I wish I were even tighter. The sphinx till I die.

Is it really called the falsely bra? Falsely bra? Something. I couldn't understand what it was. So I just phonetically wrote it down. Oh, okay. I was like, could you imagine a falsely, it's like, this bra is a false bra. Just like your boobs just come flying out. So, uh, Jen's like, I mean, what if you met a man? I mean a man and he wants to fuel you and grabbed your. your ass and it's all smushed in there. I mean, it's just not hot. I'm like, I guarantee the man's probably, at that point, the man doesn't care. He just wants to get it in. You know, he doesn't care what he feels back there. Yeah, I don't need Jen explaining to me like men not finding Spinks hot.

Fuck off, Jen. Okay, don't make, don't make, don't make Tamara bring out your fatty photo again or whatever. How dare you? I don't like that someone had a fatty photo spread about them that wasn't even a fat photo and still says so many rude things, you know, like, I was disgusting then. I don't like it you know yeah yeah have some grace ma'am have some grace yeah some of us needs the spanks okay i'm not apologizing to you i don't care if that guy fucking thinks it's hot he found it hot enough to get me naked in the first place now he's gonna suffer yeah so tamara and the other van tamma's like last night we went to the bar and gretchen was like such a dana i'm like have you met your husband just um you had dinner with any lately

Yeah. So then we see a clip of this offensive Gretchen moment, which Tamara is in the bar like trying to sexy dance for Shannon, you know, and like doing her squat twerk or whatever the hell she's trying to do. And Gretchen's just sitting at the bar smiling. Super offensive. Super offensive moment from Gretchen. Well, it is kind of annoying. It does suck when everyone's like having fun. And then there's one person who's like, I'm selling. And you're like, okay, get over it. But also by the time, one thing I have realized is that now that I'm in my 40s, now I'm on, now I'm deep in my 40s. I started to realize, like, when people do that, you just sort of zone them out. So the fact that Tamara can't do that. I mean, Tamara's really trying here. She doesn't dare that bitch. So then, yeah, but we're also older and our friends, like, squat twerking in the middle of hotel lobbies isn't like, hilarious as it used to be either.

And there's that. I think I'm probably, I think I'm probably the person at the bar. Like, can I get another drink? I'm with that idiot. She was just probably thinking about what her next, you know, online sale will be, you know? for discount code she's like oh my god i got extra crucifixes in this month and better figure out how to move those while tamma's torquing i just don't understand why i should want to sit at the bar she creeps around you like there's never a confrontation or a conversation i thought it'd be

spicy you know i feel like emily is emily is just she's just like the worst these days i mean she is she really acts so friendly with gretchen and the moment she's with tamer she talks so much shit about about Gretchen. And this is not me defending Gretchen. This is me just pointing out how fake Emily really is. Given that they all are kind of like a certain degree of fake and they all are, they talk to each other's backs, et cetera. Emily just sort of really goes and runs back information to Tamara all the time. And it's just like she really is a jerk. She's a jerk. And I think that, and I've said it a zillion times and I'll probably say it a zillion more. The worst thing about those two is that they're just not good friends. I feel like everybody else,

they have their moments, yes, where they hear something, they go back and tell the other person. Like, that's the nature of the show. But they at least stick to sides, you know, and stand up for their friends until it all goes to shit or whatever. But these two don't even try. They just, they fake it to everybody's faces and then they just try and, like, ruin their shit just for fun. Every single episode. And they also blow their load way too quickly with it. But also hearing the information later in the episode that Emily and Gina are just so mortified and have this moral quandary over when they're even running

back to Gretchen for this past three weeks being so nice and all of that. It's like, it's just gross, you know? Yeah. See something. Say something. Okay. Don't hide until it's like, you know, don't hide out and be nice until it's convenient for you because you'll have other people on your side. Mm-hmm. Yeah. I totally agree. So, um, uh, Emily's like, this Gretchen and Terror Carousel needs to stop. It borders on obsession. It's weird. Well, guess what? Last time I checked the person who pressed go on the carousel was you because everything was fine and Gretchen said her thing and then you went and ran and told

Tamara about it so you just let me know when you want to you know take responsibility for this well Jenner was even having a good time she was tipsy she was dancing with me and Gina's like honestly Tamara Jenna's whoever

everyone tells her to be that's just who Jenna's she's like well we had to talk so best Tiddly, dear, Tiddley, dear. Let's have a flashback to the talk I had better. Where was me and Jen? We were talking about Lexus's wedding. And I said, no one should say you're going to be friends with the dumbbeds.

So be friends with Lexus. Tamara saying that is so funny. Anyone on this show saying that, given that they pull that card all the time. Yeah. So Gina's like, but the thing is, like, Shannon's saying she wasn't going to going to the wedding, like on her, like she wasn't going to go to the wedding, like on her own. So I like, I don't see why now Jen is saying that Shannon asked him not to. You know, like, I have a crazy perspective on this, which is like, don't understand it.

And also don't really care. And it's none of your business. Who the fuck cares? Like, why are you trying to, like, they're trying so hard to tear apart Shannon and Jen just to make get something going. It's like, why are you doing this? Like, why, like, because I have nothing going on, you know? Gina has Travis's balls. That's literally all she has.

And, you know, you're right, Gina, the last episode was like, so, Jen, like, I mean, Shannon doesn't want you to go to the wedding. Did she say she doesn't want you to go? What does Shannon tell you she doesn't want to go to the wedding? So Shannon said that, right? Shannon said that, yeah, so Shannon said that right. Yeah. And then, yeah, yeah, you know, Shannon said that, so you like want to be mad about her? Like, doesn't he want to be mad about her for it all, Jen?

Like, what do you want to do, Jen? This man, it's only about her rebels. And I see a fan fucking ride into it. So the, yeah, the van arrives to the tulip garden. And others like, wow, tulips, how beautiful. What a lovely birthday we're having for my child at the tulip farm. Okay. Can I get a word?

A word, please. Pineapple. Okay. Sure. Let's go with that. Oh, my God. I think I feel these mushrooms because right now I'm seeing flowers.

It's because we're at a tulip farm. Oh, yeah. But when you're walking through a flower field, the possibilities are endless. And so they walk around the fields and they're taking pictures. And Heather's supposedly high, so she can't even get her head in the frame.

You just see like a corner of hair whenever she takes a selfie. The post-production team has a lot of fun with this one. They start doing all sorts of like trippy things. They make like a flower crying and they make a weird tulip outline matte situation. And they're like, oh, thank God, we have something to do. So we're so sick of making it, making a transition from a surfer walking across the screen going from the beach to Gina's house. I'm so sick of making a transition with that guy dropping a basketball.

I know. How many times can I make three bars appear across the screen and one bar shows Emily cleaning a counter. One shows Tamara opening a fridge, and one shows Shannon trying to face him her daughter, and then all three bars go away, and we wind up on Gretchen. How many time's going to do that? I cannot use this dog on rollerblades anymore. Please, give me something. Give me some good mushroom content in the tulip field.

Please, anything. So we see the tulip crying, and it's really a baby. There's a baby crying in the background. And it seems like, why is that baby crying? This isn't a place to cry. Man up, baby. Man up. I feel like it's like a great place to cry, honestly.

And then Shadden's like, Because this is all life is. I go through all of this shit myself for years just to end up in a fucking field of allergies. I'd be crying if I was in this beautiful multicolored tulip paradise. And all of a sudden I see like, Heather DeBrobe, like,

Welcome to the tulip. Like the witch of the tulip field has arrived. Baby, can I get a word? No. Your baby doesn't know words yet. How am I supposed to groundling? So then there's like a horse statue. So Shannon's like, I'm going to be wacky.

So I'm going to get on this horse. But Shannon, who has ridden horses for her whole life, decides not to get on the horse in the normal way, which is to, you know, swing a leg up. But she instead, like, grabs it from below and straddles it and does that, like, tries to be crazy. And then she gets up there. And it's like, oh, God, Shannon really.

really killing it when the con I have to get up here using the horse's penis hilarious wait it's not a penis it's an iPad so the she's like well it's a statue I can feel

it's plaster it's not real it's not like a real penis a real horse isn't plaster and the producer tells her do you remember what that feels like she goes yes I remember what a penis feels like hmm I mean I I think I do.

Is it sort of like the felt, it's like felt. It's like touching a puppet, like a Muppet, right? No? Oh. Maybe I don't remember. So Jen and Gretchen get on the buggy behind the horse and they're like whipping it. And Gretchen's like, yeah, do it, horse, do it. And Heather's like, oh no, look at them, queens of quote unquote comedy.

Am I right? Okay, I'll take that one. I'll take that one. I'll take it. It's the I hate Tamara Club. Gidey up. And so Emily's like, Shannon is clearly the president. Gretchen is the historian because if you need to bring something up from 15 years ago, she is your girl.

But just don't put Jen in charge of finances. Let's not take you, as far as I could tell, Emily, you could be historian too because you were the one who dug up all that information on Katie. on Katie at the reunion. So let's not historian shade people on this show. Emily Simpson. Thank you, Alfredo. Wow, we were really the fun club over here. And Gina's like, oh, my God.

You know what? Do you remember, come on, guys. Let's start a storyline because we don't got nothing. Okay, Heather, come over here. Come over here. Okay. Do you remember when Alexis's wedding was brought up And Jen said Shannon requested a not to go.

Really? Yeah, I talked to Jen about Alexis, and I said you act like you're not friends with her. Yeah, well, I talked to Shannon about that. What a coincidence. Right at the same time when we were at different restaurants. And I said you act like you have all these boundaries. But Jen still talks to Alexis.

Seems like a bullshit friendship. Well, I, like, why can't you just say I'm friends with Alexis? Like, why is Shannon being so mean to her? What does Shannon have on her? Is Shannon blackmailing her? Like, why is Shannon so dangerous? I feel like it's, like, not safe to be on the same cast with Shannon. Should she even be on this show anymore?

I feel bad because I think she's in a bad state. Oh, my God. I think she's actually dying. I'm scared. And then this whole bridal shower thing. Like, I'm only hands up winning Shannon, you know, when I thought my whole relationship was going to implode. And then this is what bugs me.

You know, it's like, let's celebrate what Jen's, So with Ryan a year later, like, where's my pizza party? I'm like, I know you're not going to find still the pizza party storyline. No one is going to celebrate you and Travis. I'm sorry, okay? No, we're not going to celebrate your fake storyline of moving out on Travis. So you can escape the wife trying to take half of your money for child support or whatever the hell is going on. Yeah, you don't get a party for realizing you were being a dip shit for a year, kicking out your, kicking out your boyfriend.

I mean, like, you get parties for milestone things. Jen's getting married. Shannon's like, well, she's getting married. It's not going to be in the show. We should probably do something for her. And I like this girl. She's the only one not being mean to me right now. So I'll throw her a party.

Why not? I also have to do something on this season. And now Gina is basically trying to tear apart Shannon and Jan. She's trying to kind of quote unquote expose Shannon and try to like rip them asunder. Ultimately, what we see here is because Gina didn't get a party and she wanted a party. And this goes right back to it. The Gina's an asshole. Like, she's so shitty to her friends.

Yeah. And I don't even know that she really wants a party from Shannon. I think she's just out to destroy for no reason. She's just bored. And her whole, like, I've been such a good friend to Shannon. When? When? When have you been such a good friend to Shannon?

I count with this whole story. She's been so nice to Shannon. This is her version of being nice. Shannon, like, I'm your friend. And I just wanted to stay here on TV that you might have. a problem with alcohol. Like everybody's worried about you. Are you drunk right now? Could you breathe into this? Breathe into this. Let's see if your car starts. Her whole thing is that like she was, she hated Shannon. Then Shannon got a DU and then she felt me and felt like as a fellow DUI person that

like she should help Shannon. And she was nice to Shannon and she supported Shannon. And that was all very nice and nice and good. And now she's like, now where's my party? Which then she's accusing Shannon of actually being very insincere and having ulterior motives with the way she moved socially when actually gina has kind of revealed that herself and maybe she doesn't even want explicitly a party i guess she's saying like i was there for you shannon but then you're not being nice to me the way you're being nice to jenn but like i don't know i think chanin probably sees you for who you are gino which is someone who's like a jerk like emily and yeah and she does literally want a party because emily goes look where's the gino still with travis party she goes yeah yeah yeah

Yeah. You know, I'm like, this is more like my friendship with Shannon because she, like, pushes me away because I hold her a cannibal. And it irritates me because, like, I'm going to piss you off sometimes because it's in your best interest. But, like, I'm the one who's considered lower on the totem pole than her. And then, like, Jen, that's not fair. That's not fair. So then why are you wanting a party from her? Okay. Like, then move on. So now we go to the cafeteria. And Tamara, Tamara is, they're all sitting at a, at a table. Tam's like, Heather, can you serve us? Because there's some sandwiches are there, service. So Heather takes these platters. She serves Tamara and she's like, oh, this is too much. Where are the Alfredo's?

Okay, Alfredo, put down your drum. Give us the sandwiches. And she's like, why am I doing this? I'm too rich for this. So she stops. And Tamara's like, I'm not like when they got a sandwich. There's not being my issues that send me. I do love that, like, Heather could really only, like, step into the role of the service industry for about 30 seconds before she had to put it all down.

I can't. Who am I, Wendy Malick? Well, I'm glad we got to see them before they went away. Gina's like, ooh, tulips, you know, the circle of life, because tulips die. Oh, yeah. I mean, I was trying to count the people here and figure out who died. I felt like watching Gina hi is like giving a New Yorker 15 cups of coffee and winding them up and letting them go. Meanwhile, Jean is just staring off into space with zero energy. Look at her. Look at all that energy.

Travis has big balls. I want to know something, Jen. Like the whole thing came out about like the Alexis wedding and like you said that you're like not going. She's like, yeah, for Shadden. Yeah, the whole thing came up when you brought it up, you mean? She's like, yeah, that whole Alexis wedding thing just happened to come up again, like, naturally, as if I'm not the one who's brought it up every single time. But yeah, it just came up. But then, like, someone else said that she asked you not to go. She didn't ask me not to go.

Excuse me. No, no, she didn't ask me not to go. How dare you? I'm going to eat a lollipop. I'm going to eat a lollipop during the scene. I mean, I'm sorry, it pops up. Why aren't you going? Why aren't you going then?

What does it matter? Why does it matter? But why does it matter? My turn. My turn. Why aren't you going? My turn. Okay.

Well, I don't understand why. You haven't answered. Why are you going to this wedding then? I'm just trying to have a lollipop. I'm sorry, but he called these popsicle here. Okay. Well, you shouldn't not go to your friend's wedding. Well, I didn't tell her not to go.

I did not tell you not to go. I did not tell you that. Well, but she said she's still friends with her. How do you feel about that? Well, I do like Alexis. I told you that. Jen's like, oh, oh, oh, oh, wow. Mop.

Mop. I didn't know that. I thought you weren't her friend anymore. Did I know that? No. No. I, well, I, I'm just having 30 to 40 negative thoughts about Jen, Jen Petranti, because I thought you weren't friends with her anymore,

which is why I threw you a party, because I thought you were better friends with me. And I thought you would enjoy that. And I thought that you were going to be my ally for the rest of the show ever, for the rest of time. And I'm a little upset right now. Shannon, your issue with Lexus is your issue with Lexus. She hasn't done anything to me. Nothing to me. I get that.

I get that. But if you look at the things that she has done to me, they're pretty disgusting. I mean, we're talking about Earl of Earl of Pearl, not eating a vegetable disgusting. It's free, unforgivable. It's not easy for me to be friends with someone who is friends with someone that I know isn't very kind to me. Oh, sorry, I'm not following that. Could you say that again? Okay.

Well, it's not easy for me to be friends with someone whose friends with someone, who's friends with someone. Wait, did I add one too many friends? Now this person's friends with that person who's friends with that person who's friends with that person is. Why does everybody hate me? Everybody hates me. So are you saying that knowing I'm friends with Alexis dictates how you feel about me? Well, I mean, yeah, a little bit. Yeah. That's really fucked up. That's really fucked up. Gene and Emily, why are you smiling so much right now? I'm really mad at Shannon. Yeah, everything is fucked up. But it's in. Look how that's that it's in. And Emily's like, you got a dictator who's friends with her? Well, I'm not even that close with her, so I don't know what you guys are mad about. Well, I think her impression, I don't even know where she got on this, is that you have no relationship with her. Like, I mean, that's, well, that has been my impression.

That has been my impression. Now, I'm not a friend dictator, but if the situations were reversed, I would not be friends with someone who is mean to Holly. I'm, I'm sorry, which one is Holly again? I'm still pretty new to this group. You, Holly, right? Holly. Oh, I'm Jen. Oh, Jen, yeah.

Oh, it's okay. It's okay, Shannon. Shannon's kind of wacky that way. Oh. I think that, like, it's that you tipto around how you feel with her. Like, you couldn't even tell her. You didn't even really want that shower. You know what I mean?

Commercials. Here comes one right now. I was like, you're such a dick. Like, why do you do that? Like, why that is so obnoxious? Like, that is so mean. She's a horrible, horrible person. And Shannon's like,

And Shannon looks crushed. You didn't want that shower, but I yelled at somebody for sending us a chance in wedding stuff. She didn't want that shower. And she said if she wanted a shower, it had to specifically have blush glassware. And you didn't even have that. She thought that shower was ridiculous. I never said it was ridiculous. Come on.

Uh-huh. You were talking when we were shopping at that little terrible place that could have been like a kiosk on a beach. But like with actually- You said how ridiculous it was. So then we see, I think this is unseen footage, right? I don't remember this scene. I actually think we saw this. So, John's like, you know, I just love Shannon so much.

But why is she having a bridal lunch? Yeah. Like, why are we having a? brunch for Jen when we don't even know she's getting married. So she didn't say it was ridiculous. I think she was just saying this is sweet, but it's kind of out of left

field. Like what the hell? It's like, it's out of left field. It's not something I would do. But like Jen's like, I mean, what are you doing right now? I'm just being honest. I'm being honest about this, Tom. But so am I. I mean, you know, if I sat there and I said that, I don't say

because like you expect us all to take time out of our day to foster this fake friendship. That's the problem. That's the problem. Oh, my God. You expect us, the viewers, to sit here and watch you every week, week after week after week. That's our problem. This is, she is, Gina is, is awful. They, they really, they're testing my last nerve today. I can't deal with this right now. And this is my thing. Like, if you're going to, if you're going to constantly make shit up for storylines and just blatantly live, which is what she does all

the time. She's, it's not her first time doing it, or Emily, at least make them interesting storylines. I mean, you're trying to make a storyline out of someone not wanting a bridal shower and being forced, having a bridal shower forced on that. That's just weird. You know, you're trying to force this thing, like a fight with Alexis who's not even on the show again. It's weird. Like, come up with something better. They really are. And by the way, it still really bothers me. You brought this up last week, but it still bothers me that, you know, they're sitting here saying how like, oh my God, you should never say who's, someone's allowed to be friends with that's wrong shannon's crazy for that when we really watched a

whole thing of emily saying that if tamera met with katy that was that would affect their friendship like it's literally the same thing and it was only about two or three weeks ago that that happened and now they're getting all high and mighty about who shannon can and can not be mad at about these things so she's like well my friendship with jenn is not fake you know um that is her name right jenn Sylvia. Sylvia. My friendship with Sylvia is not fake, and it hurts my feelings because I wanted it to be beautiful for Shelly.

Shelly. Did I appreciate the bridal shower? Yes. Would I have picked that for myself? No. But sitting here at this point and pointing that out in front of all my friends is rude. But by the way, thank you so much for pointing it out. It's nice to know that people care about me.

It's just rude. I appreciate it. Now listen, just for the record, I did not. have an issue with it. Would I have asked for anyone to plan that for me? No, I wouldn't. Oh, so are you really the correct person to be doing this right now, Gina? Oh, please. Like, you haven't been planning this with Gina. And Gina's like, well, look, Shannon, like, I love you. But like, I had your back so hard last year. And I had such a horrible time last year with Travis when I left him so that he wouldn't have his income to claim on child support. And he

could still try to get child support from its rich ex-wife. And then this year, my family came back together. Maybe that's something to celebrate with a party. Like, I wouldn't have even minded if I didn't have blush glasses. Like, Jen went home really upset about it. You don't get, you don't, you don't get a party for, for patching things up with the person that you're, you're, you're dating. You just don't get that. That's not a, there are no hallmark cards to say, hey, congratulations on your decision to move back in with your boyfriend who you moved, who you kicked out in the first place. for based on bad logic like you don't have that card you have cards that say congrats on your wedding you have a wedding coming up weddings are milestones having Travis move back in and like having

starting like that's not that's not a milestone that's not having your big ball babysitter move back in doesn't doesn't require a celebration if you want to have a party that's a party and by that by the way the person who should throw that party is emily not shannon yeah exactly so almost like how she wants a party. I don't want a party. I just want things to be based on genuine feelings, you know, but they are genuinely, they are genuine feelings. I was super happy for Dolores. What was that? Oh, sorry, different Dolores and listening. I think the issue here is that we can see that this new friendship forging here, but it just doesn't seem very authentic and you have a lack of communication and then we see you just automatically roll with Shannon blindly. I mean, you want to talk about

authenticity. And yet at the same time, you're going to be all buddy, buddy with grudgers and then go and bring everything back to Tamara. And you're going to complain about someone's inauthentic friendship. I don't think so. Yeah, I don't see how Jen is rolling with Shannon blindly. They're just hanging out a little bit here and there. It's weird. And then Heather, they share, by the way, they share the common bond of dealing with Tamara's wrath. They have a common enemy and that has brought them together as friends. And I think that is a very valid basis for a friendship. There's no more natural a friendship. I see. Yeah. So Heather's like, oh, I heard the word

roll. Do you remember when Shannon said, don't roll on me? Remember? No, I remember when she was accused of it. You guys have this new friendship and you're always laughing and stuff is disgusting. Well, no, I love friends, but will you shut up and let me talk? But like she acts like a wingman and she's probably going to that wedding. I want to talk. Shut the fuck up. Yeah, she doesn't even like peeing. So I don't even know why you would give up peeing.

She was very offended. Shut up. Shut up, Gina. Will someone not give her a gummy tonight? She won't stop talking. She won't stop. Gina, let's play the quiet game. Okay, I do this all the time with Alfredo.

I say, okay, Alfredo, when I'm in the room and you're in the room, you have to play the quiet game. I get to talk to people that are not you also, obviously okay and go well i don't even know what to say now i'm done well sometimes you just need your best friend to tell you to shut the fuck up so now they decide they're going to go to these hot tub things and um they're like hot tubs that are on water they're like river hot tubs they're like river hot tubs they're the things that i'm sure people in amsterdam hate like oh god they're the tourists again in those little hot tubs it's like when you see the uh the bachelorette

parties on the bar bicycles in the bar bikes still like oh you're going to say that happy happy bachelor's party Jessica you know like that you see they're throwing her a birthday party

they're throwing her a bachelor party and you're not bad at them so first they have to get there by going in separate vans let's talk some shit so they get in their vans and Emily is in with Jen and she's like whoa what do you think of Ryan's going to think of your new Instagram that doesn't have him in it.

And then we see a conversation 30 minutes earlier where Gina's like, oh my God, when I open up Instagram, like I don't even feel like I'm following you. I feel like I'm following Ryan. Like you need to have a separate Instagram from Ryan. Yeah, I love Gina giving social media modernization advice. Carabella. Um, someone's like, yeah, you, uh, you have this Instagram. It's worth money.

We don't want to just want, we don't, we just don't want you to be in the same position where you were before, where you don't know what the money is. Because if you do do that, then Gina's going to have to yell at you at a coffee shop again. Oh, I didn't even think about it like that. I mean, Gretchen, you're the same way, right, Gretchen? Like, it's not all you, it's not, it's not, it's your Instagram's not you and Slade. She goes, no, it's just me. Because, like, it's all full-blown business for me. I know people make fun of it.

I don't care. And, yeah, so then we see a clip of Heather and Emily making fun of her. Oh, wow. Look, she's making content. She's going to sell that hat. She's wearing, don't forget to use code Gretchen 20. Okay, Heather, who was trying to sell fucking masks during COVID for like 500, you know, times what they were worth.

I mean, Heather is the actual wrong person to be talking about monetizing things bad. Some of the things Heather has monetized have been disgusting. Like when her and Terry tried to monetize the Atkins diet and they tried to make it their own like, Terry Dubrow diet, guess what? We found a secret to youth. You only eat protein. Thank you. Thank you. Oh, Alfredo, I don't want to have to cue you again.

Like, okay, from the top, they only, what was it? Only monitor. I've lost a threat. Protein, broken, only body of the, bro, bro, so I didn't get to it yet. Yeah, if you get really, wha, if you get really good at it, you can make a lot of money doing it, too. I've always been a serial entrepreneur. I sell frosted flakes. I sell cinnamon toast crunch.

I got six businesses. Hopefully, that'll always be mailbox money. It's important to stand on your own without a man. Now let me just call Slade to make sure I said that part right. Slade, I said the part about standing and doing business. Yeah, okay, good. And it's good to not be reliant on a man. That's it.

Gretchen's so happy. I'm going to do whatever I can be to be like Gretchen. I'm just, you know, I'm going to do whatever I can to be financially independent. I'm going to become less of a slade and more of a Gretchen. Basically, it's what she's goals. Hashtag goals. Hashtag goals, I can say. So, Jeter is like, okay, welcome, welcome of America to the other van. So, I mean, I support that.

I'm glad that they're, like, happy. And I just, like, don't want to see my friend get lost because suddenly I care about Jen a lot. Like, it's really important for me. You know, I care a lot about Jen, which is why we need. she had financial troubles and got behind on rent, I went and humiliated her in a restaurant. Like, so in that, in that respect, it's

really important that I don't want to see her get lost. I just care so much about her. She's just a paper place. Yeah. By the way, Shannon, I know that right now when we have that conversation it made it sound like you had a fake relationship with John.

Who? John. I'm sorry. Debra? Oh, Deborah, mm-hmm, yeah. Well, I wasn't being fake. I really wanted her to feel special. And for you to say she didn't want me to do that, well, it really hurts my feelings that Belinda would say something like that.

That really hurts. Well, that's what she was saying, that she didn't want her in the first place. Well, you heard it from, from Tamara. I'm sorry I interrupted you. What did you say? No, it's like, I love Tamara being like the truth teller. Like, consider this to us. Tamara, who like managed to bastardize every piece of information that comes to her.

I'm not going to lie. It makes me feel stupid to know that, uh, that, um, Francine did not appreciate that. I thought it was a nice time. Congratulations, you've reached the end of part one, of a two-part recap. For part two, go look for the recap that says, part two. See you over there, suckers. watch what crappins would like to thank its premium sponsors ain't no thing like alison king it's always a party on alison block our way is the amber way it's the foster and the furious it's amanda foster it's always automatic with ashley auto put your hands together for carly clap get on the right foot with chrisie offit she's not just a shella she's a daniella itchels we never miss her call it's diane call aaron macnicholas she don't miss no trickleus Hava Nigelah Weber

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