Watch What Crappens - #30780 Below Deck Med S10E07: The Moldin’ Bachelor

Episode Date: November 18, 2025

The blah-chelor continues to whittle down his pool of maidens on Below Deck Med, and meanwhile Kizzi vultures Max, despite Cathy’s declared interest. To watch this recap on video, listen to our bonus episodes, and participate in live episode threads, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wondry Plus subscribers can listen to Watcher Crappins ad-free right now. Join Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts. What would you do if the ocean vanished, only to come rushing back towards you as a 30-foot wall of water? In this season of Against the Odds, we live four extraordinary stories of survival during the 2004 Indian Ocean tsunami, the deadliest on record. Listen to Against the Odds on the Wondry app or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch what happens. Who cares what happens when there's so much that crap is. Hello and welcome to watch our crappins.

But all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker. Joining me today is the hilarious and lovely and lovely beautiful Ronnie Karim. Hi, Ronnie. Well, hello. How are you, Honeypime? Doing just great. Just great. Today we are here to talk about below deck med. Don't forget, we have a wonderful and beautiful Patreon community that you should

certainly be part of to get the full Crappins experience. Go to Patreon.com slash watch what crappens. And we do a weekly bonus episode. we do a we do it we do crap is on demand where you can actually watch us not just listen it's a whole thing it's great there's a discord community get involved be part of it be active do all those things or don't it's your choice we won't get mad at you either way thanks to everyone who came to crappy hour earlier this week we had a great time talking it all down with the two judgy girls talking about bravo con that episode is up so if you want to hear everything that happened at bravo con over the weekend well or everything that we could cram into an hour at least go check that out we had so much fun with that also we did an amazon live uh so you can check those out and we'll do another one we normally do them every other week but we are doing two back to back weeks this time so the new the next amazon live will be this coming monday so that's all that that's all that let's get into

some below deck mediterranean what say you rondell caram what's say let's do it this is season 10 episode eight it's called french kiss dun dun dun there's a new girl in town and she's feeling good and her name is kathy and she's not going to let anybody wreck her good time not even a lady named kizzy poor kizzy broke up with her boyfriend because she thought she'd get all the men on the boat and now kathy has come in to possibly wreck her dream so what will kizzi do she'll go straight for a man she didn't have any interest in in the first place just to get one over on Kathy ain't them the breaks kids that is correct well we're also in the middle of this funky charter that's basically the bachelor except it's happening on a boat and um he we have bachelor

who is kind of like a like fun house mirror version of chip from chip and joanna and he's talking to this girl anna who is a monster and totally vapid and a pathological liar i've decided. And he's like, hey, having fun so far. She's like, yeah, it's been a blast. I took some good photos. It got some great content. Yeah, for the next time I got to San Trope on a helicopter. I take the helicopter from Dallas to San Trope the whole way. Yeah, it totally happened. Yeah. Now we go to the galley where Kizzy and Josh are. And Kizzy's like, oh, only six now. Josh's like, yeah, it would be amazing. If we could do this every time and just get rid of guests. The charter goes on. Just get rid of gluten free every time.

It would be a lovely, lovely ton of events. So then we see people cleaning and cooking and doing all that stuff. And Kathy is asking if there are coasters. And Kizzy's like, no. And Kathy's horrified because Kathy is like a chief stew. And how have these people never heard of coasters? Well, my favorite part was then we cut to Kathy. And she goes, coasters, coasters, coasters, act.

I love that. So now Aisha is talking about this. view and joe comes up and she's like this charter we've got a bachelor a mitchmaker a handful of bacheloretts i just love romance i love watching romance i've got me popcorn it's like her huge popcorn she's watching it and then uh joe uh deckhand joe we have to make a we have to make a uh a differentiation between bachelor joe and deckhand joe we have to make a uh a differentiation between bachelor joe and deckhand because we have two fuck boys named Joe, but they have different stations on this boat.

One is wealthy and in control, and one is a poor and just has to sweep. So Dekan Joe is hanging out with Nathan. He's like, oh, this time it's affected me, you know? That's affected me. And Nathan's like, what has affected you? Or it's impossible for someone like me, you know, to like someone that's much after four days.

It's impossible. I didn't even give it massive gain. It's like, I haven't even kissed her. is he saying that he likes it's is he saying that he likes the after four days he likes her so much and that's impossible to like someone that much for four days or is he saying wow she likes me so much yeah he's saying she likes him too much yeah he's like oh this girl's so into me he's like oh god i just can't help it it's just me it's just natural i'm not even trying and i've already got this girl in love with me and what am i going to do with this girl because you know

she's hurt she's a hurt girl like he sees the new girl come on he's like he's like like, I'm going to go for that. Now, how do I dump this other loser? So he's like, well, I can't be with her because her boyfriend died. And so she's going to need too much for me. And I just can't do it. I can't do it. He's doing this whole thing like, well, she's so into me. And after just four days, that's like too much. Cuckoo for Cocoa Puff's at my right. Women, aren't they always like this? It's like, oh, God. It's just amazing how they do is time and time again on all these shows. It's so predictable, you know, the moment that they, well, he's afraid that he's also gonna look like a dick because he knows he's when he says i'm gonna hurt her that's an admission that he

has no interest in doing anything serious uh not that she wants to do anything serious but he knows he's gonna like ultimately just have sex with her move on to the next one and he doesn't want to get shit for it again especially since she has trauma in her back in her in her history and so he's trying to make her seem like she's the crazy one for him when he was the one who came on this boat and started flirting with her endlessly endlessly and then's gonna act like she went crazy no sir we've out in your our eyes on you yeah he says i'm not here for hurting anyone and i think she'll get hurt because she's got a situation a boyfriend dying isn't a situation for crying for crying out loud the way you don't hurt someone is by not hurting them he's like he's like i'm not here to hurt

someone but i think she'll get hurt no how about we rephrase it into what you really mean to say is i'm not here to hurt someone but i think i will hurt her not she'll get hurt she is not the one I'm like really on one all of a sudden. We're only 30 seconds into this recap and I'm already pissed off. Yeah. So he's like, well, you know, she's just something I'm used to that's playful and all for doing anything. And then there's Victoria. Well, that's Kizzi I was talking about.

And then there's Victoria, dead boyfriend, did boyfriend Victoria? You know, I love that about her. But I just don't want to hurt this girl, especially after what she's went through with that boyfriend. So I'm just in my head. I'm just in my head about anything. Everything. Hold on. Let me put my teeth together.

and smile i know he's pretending like he's actually thinking this through a lot and that he's like he's he's caught and he's trying to do the good thing he's trying to cast himself in this light of being this good guy who's in over his head it's like no you just want to stick your your dinkle into someone's linkle i think it's i think that's why these mediocre men are always on below deck because I think midmen put themselves in situations where they're your only choice on purpose so they can feel like this because let's face it in a normal world no one cares what this loser's doing like no one's going to be fighting over this guy you know it's the last ice cream in the freezer you know we're all going to fight over it and that's all it is so he's going to

work on boats as long as he fucking can below deck mid that's him right there so Nathan basically Well, then he says, I just need to communicate more and stop being a wee bitch. And Nathan's like, I've never seen you do this before, you know, I've never seen that. So Sandy is like, okay, everyone's time to leave the deck. Okay, okay, so we're going to leave the dock. It's going to be exciting. And maybe some people could talk about how the table looks good for dinner. Oh, good, Asia.

You're already doing that. Asia, Asia loves the way the table looks. And now we're undocking. And guess what? We undocked without any issues. God, what a great charter. Where's Captain Kerry when you need them All right, we're coming out of talking

Everybody could die If we don't pass that without an inch of its life It could go down We could all lose a limb Mother's children No one's getting off this boat All right, we did it, we did it Everyone calm down now, calm down

But Sandy's like yep Hey guess what guys we're gonna end dock Okay, we end docked I'm going back to watch wind Okay So Nathan says at the beginning of the season, I felt like I couldn't even be a bosun because I was working as a deckhand,

picking up all the slack from the crew, let's show some greatest hits from those two dumbdums who left. We see Christian and Tessa, and Tessa's like, how do you use a boat? What's this for? And then he's like, but now I trust my team, and I can relax a bit in my mind a little bit, and I'll enjoy this as long as it lasts. So then Joe, right after his,

I don't want to hurt her. We see Joe going up to V, and he's like, oh, you're just doing so fast. fantastic on the deck we all love you there you're doing such a good job what a woman ah i've always wanted my wife to do good on the deck and you're doing it god i can't wait to impregnate you impregnate you with a little baby sammy it'll come out take care of all the all the railings every day god i hope she doesn't love me deuce i don't know why she's fallen for me so much she's acting like we have a whole future together where did she get that idea from yeah so we go to amy the

madam talking to bachelor joe and she's like are you having so much fun your eyes don't seem to be focusing and they're slightly watery he's like oh i'm doing great he's having fun so she's like yeah well thank god we're getting a different view i was really getting sick of that view on the dock yeah and then um uh then alicia's this girl alicia really likes him she's like i've had a really good vibe with him i think i really like him a lot i love the way that he kind of looks like the head chicken and chicken run like i feel like that's great it means that he has initiative he's gonna like get us somewhere so then um uh bachelor joe is saying, you know, they all have great, they all have different personalities and they're all

great, you know, I love them. They're all so interesting. And then we cut to Anna saying, what do I think of when I see him is just like low net worth alert. Am I right guys? I'm just here for content. So then we go to Josh, who's getting ready for dinner and he's like, I want my food to be the star of the show, but I'm happy for this charter, you know, I'm happy for it to take a back seat because what's more delicious than taking a bite out of love? Wow. Yeah. He says, as a hopeless romantic myself, I'm going to aid in creating a romantic atmosphere with the menu.

I've got to brush up on my aphrodisi accent. I'm like, please don't. I don't want to see Bachelor Joe with a boner walking around this deck. Okay, just serve some potatoes and steak and we'll be fine. So they start taking out. They keep showing him in that clown makeup and think it's hilarious. It's just so cringe. Stop. Just leave me alone with this.

Leave me alone with the chef. No, don't leave me alone with that. I mean, just leave me alone. I know. X him out of my life is what I'm acting. Cut the chef, please. So now Joe is sitting with the ladies and they're at this like red table. Everything looks very Valentine's-y.

And Ashley is doing, like, so one of them asks like if any of them have done 23 and me. And Ashley's like, oh my God, that's like I never have I ever questioned. That's hilarious. So Amy says, okay, well, now that you brought it up, I do kind of have some pre-written questions, everyone. We're going to play a little bit of a game. Lisa Renna style. Okay, I'm sure America's going to love this. Okay, everyone's got a question.

Read a question, guys. Okay, never have I ever gotten a lap dance. Oh, my God, somebody's drinking. Never have I ever been kidnapped from a mall in a small town. Today's some old person on a boat. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Hang on. Never ever, ever had my mother kidnapped and then been blackmailed that I'll only get her head back in a box if I date some old man on a boat. Never have I ever. Never have I ever auditioned to be on the new Van der Pump rules, but then somehow wound up on this strange dating sub show on below deck. Oh my God. It's just me drinking. Okay. Never have I ever thought I was going to be the new Van of White, except if Van of White refuses to retire, which leaves me as a whore on a boat. so they're all doing this it's funny they're joking and again um anna is a compulsive liar because there's they're like everything they do she drinks too it's like never have i ever been part of a donkey show into yawanna and she's like i'll drink to that i'm like anna you've not done that i'm telling you this right now you have not done that yeah and they have like the mile high club questions and then someone's like

what's the mile high club and Joe says yeah it's where you have some crazy sex on an airplane at 35 000 feet and merrily is like that's disgusting and that's hot gross yeah she's like that's nasty

and I was like yeah it's hot I've done it yeah back when peanut allergies were still a thing even yeah I'm a rebel I'm Anna yeah fuck yeah I did it on the Concord last year and so he's like I guess it depends on what you're a plan, right? So then they serve more food.

And now Kizzy and Kathy are folding towels. But can I ask you a question? Have you ever heard Gospacho presented this way? Okay, so for a starter, we've got Gospacho with pesto, flour, basil, and some marinated heirloom tomatoes. Flower? Did he mean flour like? Maybe an edible flour.

I don't think that's good. I don't think that you're going to have like flour, like F-L-O-U-R. And a gazpacho, right? I don't think so. That's a weird seasoning. Unless it's like his way of talking about bread. So what we have here is we've got aged and cooked flour. We like to call that bread and some basil.

Because there is bread and a lot of gazpacho. But I agree. Flower, it's a strange choice. So Kizzy and Kathy are folding towels. And Kizzy's like, oh, I wonder if it's going to be like the bachelor. And the last night. He'll say, would you like to come to my bed? And Kathy's like, stop it.

Well, I have to, you know what, just in case. Kizzy goes, lay out some condoms. She goes, no, I was going to say lay out various petals. But that's okay, you slut. And kids say, I'm in condoms, safety first. So, uh, they're still playing games, um, and talking, uh, up at the dinner table. And Ashley, this woman Ashley's saying, oh, never have I ever stood a date up. and they all are like drinking and stuff.

And then Josh brings some more food of lobster and chicken. And then never have I ever turned my underwear inside out so I don't have to wash it. What sort of questions are this? Amy, are you really, how is this going to be productive to finding someone they're a girlfriend? These are not helpful questions. And how does that work anyway? You turn your underwear inside out. How does that help?

Because isn't that just going to make both sides of your underwear smell like ass? I don't get it. It's like a thing that people do, but I don't think it's helpful. Yeah, I don't think that's helpful, double ass in it. So then I have, who's, I've never, ever, ever kissed a friend's ex. And Anna's like, donkey show, Mexico. I was like, damn. I know.

And then she goes, and then she's like, donkey show, Mexico, gone to jail. It's like, hey, don't hate the player, hate the game. What are you even talking about? That doesn't even apply to the situation. So Amy goes, wow, you are just so fascinating. Yogurt parfe with white chocolate, basil, ganache. I want everything to have basil in it. Tonight, everyone, basil for the fascinating moment with Joe.

Here it is. I'm telling you right now, if you ever serve me a yogurt parfait on a fucking super yacht, you're going overboard. That is a lot of nerve to serve a fucking yogurt parfait on a super yacht. What are you talking about? Well, it's like there was an episode of Bear for Contessa once where, um, Someone won some sort of like auction or silent auction to have lunch with Ina Garten, Alec Baldwin, and Mirchka Hargatee, and they made that an episode.

And so she's like, here's what I'm going to make for our, for our auction winner. And she made them a trifle. And it was, I'm like, it was, she made lobster mac and cheese and a trifle. It's like someone probably paid thousands of dollars for this opportunity. And you're making them a parfait essentially. You're putting whipped cream and raspberries in a glass for thousands of dollars. Come on, Ina Garden. I love you, but you got to step it up.

You've got to make Betty's chocolate cake or something. Yeah. Don't parfame me. So then we go over to Kathy. It's bedtime. So Kathy wants a hug from Asia before bed and Kizzy sees. And she's like, she's the golden girl right now. And that's fine.

She can have that. I mean, I don't know. Why am I crying right now? Why am I crying right now? I just want to be the best. So then Max and he's. He backses out on like the bow or somewhere. He's at some part of the boat outside.

And he's getting, I think Joe, he's trying to hypnotize Joe. He's like, okay. So what you need to do is breathe in. And then, okay, breathe out. To a deeper state of relaxation. Okay, how's the fear? You feel good, Joe. Does it feel good.

Sandy's watching this from her area of the bridge. And she's like, what the hell's going on down there? What is going on? Oh, it's like, oh, it's a ball of energy, okay? Okay, now. Oh, gosh, he wants to watch wind now. I can see it in his eyes. I can see it in his eyes.

Like the bridge. Lack the bridge. Okay. Now, anytime you hear the word, Shamil, you will do a small dance. You've been hypnotized. So, Joe's like, that felt really good. Oh, God.

You know, things are getting a little sloppy right now. Ever since Joe got on board, I feel like they're more interested. and having fun than doing the job, okay? And now is where I really want to see Nathan, elevating as a leader, not just going back, okay? So with that being said, I'm going in my cab. And I got to watch the season finale of wind.

It's supposed to be a good one. Oh, my God. So Amy takes Bachelor Joe outside to talk. And she's like, okay, well, we have the opportunity for two special dates tomorrow. So let's focus on the two you are the most interested in. And he's like, fair, fair. Yeah, that's fair. Fair. Okay. Well, let's take Alicia. And he goes, whoa, we seem to have a lot of interests and traits. Okay. Marilelli. And he's like, well, I mean, she's funny and genuinely nice. But Ashley was lovely. And I had a genuine, she had a genuine interest in getting to know me. You know, she asked me where I bought my hair. That was really sweet. She asked me what I was looking at, why my eyes wouldn't focus. I thought that was kind. You know, she handed me a tissue to wipe the tears out of my eyes. I didn't even know I was crying. Where are we? What's my name?

okay and tell me about Anna Anna Anna what about Anna and he says like oh yeah she's just been you know she's been her own unique and independent self and that's great um there are definitely three people I'd like to get to know more okay yeah but it has to be two you can only cut down to two he's like okay well since I've said very specific things about each one of them this is going to be a very hard choice to make I mean there's the one who I genuinely liked and the one who I liked genuinely, and I don't know, it's going to be hard to choose between the two of them, genuinely. Yeah, so now we're not going to see his decision because it's TV.

So she's like, well, they're both amazing women. And he goes, yeah, fair, fair, fair, fair enough. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappence commercial. Picture this. You're standing on the beach when you notice something strange. The horizon doesn't look right. At first, all you can see is a thin white line stretching as far as your eyes can see.

Then, the line starts to rise. But it's not the horizon at all. It's a wave, a 30-foot wall of water. And it's racing straight toward you. On the day after Christmas in 2004, a 9.1 magnitude earthquake hit off the coast of Indonesia, triggering a devastating tsunami. It struck Thailand without warning. No alarms, no cell phone alerts, no evacuation.

In this season of Against the Odds experience one of the deadliest natural disasters in history through the perspectives of those who did everything they could to survive. Follow Against the Odds on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of Against the Odds, Tsunami in Thailand, early and ad-free right now on Wondery Plus. So everyone's going to bed and Alicia is with the other girls. Leach is one of the Bachelorette's and says, you know, she's going to be. go the bathroom and then um and then alicia goes up to kizzy and it's like hey can you grab joe for two seconds because she wants to have some one-on-one time with bachelor joe yeah so then anna's getting

more pictures taken she's like oh my god i've got so much content if i get kicked off this boat i mean i'm still going to have so much i mean nothing's going to bring me down oh my god donkey show on on land coming up so then kizzy goes to get bachelor's Fleur Joe and brings him up and he is we see Anna talking to Ashley so Anna's like well I'm like down for the yacht but like I'm not down for him I have no interest in that poor person where did they get this confused elderly person I've seen people wandering around on the freeway pushing shopping carts that look like they have more you know self confidence than this guy where did they find this man this disgusting man so then we go and Ashley goes he's sweet

So then we go to Joe and Alicia. They're kind of having their moment. And apparently he only is interested in women whose name start with the letter A. We've got Anna, Alicia, and Ashley. And then poor Marieli with that M. She's never going to last. So Bachelor Joe's like, hey, he's just a very typical guy. It's like, hey, give me all of the thin, blonde ladies who have the same face and hair.

Thanks. He got basically like a binder. He got a binder of women. and what's his face style. He got a binder of women and he's like, I can't get through the A's just, let's just choose from this chapter. I don't want to read through the whole binder.

Just choose from here and put them on the yacht. Yeah, but the important thing is that, you know, beyond looks that you have something in common that you can have a really good conversation with because looks don't last forever and conversation does. So I think he really might have found the right one. So here's the conversation. Hey there. How are you?

Good. How are you? Nice to see you. So what's happening? Just chilling. Yeah. You okay? Yeah. I mean, get them married.

Get them married immediately. Fucking amazing. Who's afraid of Virginia Wolf? That's my question. I mean, to be able to witness the beginning of just such a torrid love affair, it's just, I feel honored. The rep, heart, hey, telling you. So Ashley and Nana can hear them. So they're talking in a different section.

and they're eavesdropping on them. And so now we're back to Alicia. And she's like, yeah, like, I don't want a picture with Barcelona. I want to get to know you because some of the girls just like, you know, want pictures of Barcelona. But like, you're the real ticket. And he goes, wow, thank you. This is Tommy Bahama I'm wearing. But you know what I like about you is that you have genuine questions and interests.

And I appreciate authenticity. For example, how you told me, I'm better than Barcelona. That's important. You have a great vibe. And, like, kindness doesn't come around often. I like you. Yeah. Like, fair.

Yeah, fair. Yeah. I feel the same. Yeah. Yeah. So, that's all I really had to say. Do you have something you want to say? Because I'm just going to say, yes.

So I'm really glad you came and found me. Okay? I'm really glad. Yeah. this is like so weird huh oh come here come here you're gonna get a kiss on the cheek let me give you a kiss so then how do we do it can you show me where i should put my head can you put your hand on my cheek so i know where i should aim my head for the kiss he's like why are you why are you why are you kissing that piece of cobblestone you found on the street oh my god i'm so sorry

i would rather kiss him than you barcelona just throws it over over that he's like there yeah it's so awkward he pulls her in he puts his hand on her cheek and she wasn't expecting it. She's like, oh, oh, I, I wasn't finished with my comparison of you in Barcelona content, but that's okay. And so she sort of gives him, he like kisses her on the cheek. And then you can see, she's like, oh, I guess I should do this. So then they have like a little peck, but then they actually start to kiss, like, kiss

kiss. And it was cringy. All three versions were cringy. Yeah. And then he's like, okay, I've got a heart on now. I need to go call my daughter. What a weird, a little weird exit. So they part ways.

and then the other girls are still listening. So Ashley's like, oh, yeah, that girl kissed him? I'm stealing. I'm stealing him from her. Oh, my God. Why? This guy's a loser. What are you guys doing?

Have some self-respect. I'm embarrassed for all of you. Yeah. So people are waking up. It's the next morning people are waking up. Stuff's going in the water. And Sandy's like, hey, Nathan, are they going to use the toys at all? He's like, I don't know.

He's like, you know what? it's been a it's I've been on this show for nine years but I'm going to say something crazy all right just get ready don't worry about the slide next charter no slides

so Aisha joins Kizzy and Kathy in the mess and Kizzy's like oh this is the gossip from last night primary went to bed and then like two minutes later Alicia's like can you go wake up Joe for me oh true's trying to get him or really don't know who's in the lead I've got no clue

because he's like honestly neither do I Kathy's a bitch by the way okay What do you want me to do next So then we see Nathan Nathan goes and relieves Joe From toy duty Like putting out the toys and stuff He's like go downstairs and eat

So then Joe now goes to the galley And he's like he's looking at the food And he's getting food from the chef And now he's hanging around here, there It's 20 minutes, then 30 minutes Then it's 40 He takes an hour to eat a sandwich, basically.

Yeah. And so he never goes back to the deck. And then we see him brushing his teeth and putting around, taking his time. And now it's 40 minutes on break. And then 45. And Nathan's like, okay, will you stay on the swim platform for 15 minutes while he eats breakfast? And he's like, sure. So then we go to Alicia and the Bachelor Joe eating breakfast.

And he's like, okay, wait, you ready for some convo? Yeah. What do you normally eat for breakfast? She's like eggs. It's like, oh my God, this decision is so hard. I love all her genuine interests. So now the swim deck is empty because the swim deck is empty. So Joe decides because it's empty, he's going to do a deck check.

So he leaves the swim deck. Even though Nathan told him to stay at the swim deck for 15 minutes while he has his breakfast. And note that it takes Nathan 15 minutes to eat his breakfast, not a full hour. so Nathan is eating his breakfast and Joe is just wandering around doing who knows what just wandering and so Captain Sandy comes up to see the guests and she sees that no one's on the swim deck and she gets really upset so she's like hey Nathan Nathan can he come to the F deck Nathan Nathan Nathan uh hey can you be like can you do that thing that all the men don't do for Norma which is show up can you meet me here okay come on someone show up

Okay, Nathan, maybe that was the wrong analogy to use because you're doing what all of the guys do with Norma and you're just ignoring. Okay, can I please get an answer? Okay, I need an answer on the radio. Okay, to quote Norma's dating profile, are there any man out there? Any, anyone? Aftac, Aftac. So instead of Captain, instead of Deccan Joe going to Sandy to fix, these. fix the problem he goes down to the mess to get nathan to tell him he's like nathan sandy wants you

so then nathan's like what's wrong so then he has to run up to find sandy so he's like i'm just finishing up eaten i'll be there in two seconds so she comes to the crew max the crew mex the crew mess to see max nathan in deck hands joe and so kathy is down there basically sitting in max's lap so everyone looks like they're having fun and captain sandy does not like this she's like we need deck crew on deck. Okay, don't make me plant heroin and all of your fanny packs. You want to know what that's like? Ask a girl whose name rhymes with banana. Okay. I don't want to see all three of you in the crew mess on a charter day together ever again. And it's like, but I just came down for not on a charter. No, someone needs to be on the swim platform.

That upsets me. That upsets me. When you're on charter, stay alert. Don't relax. Make sure the guests are safe. Nathan knows better. You keep your eye on the press. Oh, wait, hold down. One second. Hi, baby. Hey, baby. What's you doing? I was going to say hi, Sandy. Oh, yeah, I'm just yelling at everyone for not paying attention.

What are you up to? Just a little bear there. Say, put a little bear on real quick. Hold on one second. You guys get back up on the deck. I don't want to see people slack enough. So Nathan's like, oh, God. And she goes, it's not okay.

And he goes, I know it's not. I know it's not. You're a leader. You should be set in an example. so she's pissed off so now Amy has now arrived at the breakfast

so she's asking if she can borrow Bachelor Joe so she takes him and meanwhile Nathan is pissed off so he's like we need people on the

platform at all time's Joe and he's like no mate no but I'm fucking fuming now look at me I'm fuming

I'm fuming about it he's like but I don't understand why he goes but you know you need to stay on the swim platform

oh Nathan when he gets angry he gets angry like my grandfather but i know it's not personal and he just wants the job done correctly you know i'm slacking a little bit because obviously he's me best mate a little bit as well but you know we've got this under control we're just ironing out the creases so then we go to amy and bachelor joe and she's like joseph the two people who are not going to continue on i think that should come from you because i've had to break up with a lot of women so far and um it's awkward okay he's like you know i've Do you know how many times I've had to say, listen, from one A named girl to another A named girl,

I feel a sisterhood with you, but unfortunately, we can't keep you here. It's hard every single time I have to send someone with the letter A in their name home. All right, fair, fair. So then we cut to Max talking to V, and he's like, just to let you know, we have been told off by Captain Sandy this morning, so we don't want to be too much in the room is. And she's like, oh, my God, I love how he talks to me. Just such a sweet man. The way he looks into my eyes

when he tells me not to waste time of the grimace. It's so hot. So Amy is like, Joe, I'm going to let you speak for yourself. So Joe, ladies, Anna and Marieli. How do you say your name again?

Mary. Would you like to name yourself Amarelli? I think that would work well for you with this charter. Ah, Mary Ali? No. Okay.

Well, anyway, Joe's has something to say. Okay, guys. So I just wanted to let you know then be up front that I've selected to have two dates with other ladies on the boat. Alicia and Ashley, they both start with an A1 talk to me about eggs. And one of them said, I'd look like Barcelona and they wanted to wrap their vaginas around me. So I've enjoyed time together, but I'm not going to pursue anything with you. I can't see a damn thing in here. Does anybody have a Josh Groban CD we can put on as these ladies walk down to talk?

Joe this is a serious experience women's hearts are on the line I'm going to need you to stop doing your Catherine Hepburn impersonation that's just how it is just how I talk ladies I just this is just so old white man of Joe

I know you know I'm a rich guy I can't get a date in a normal place so I guess I'll get a bunch of prostitutes on a boat a bunch of escort out of boat and see if it works escort Olympics So they're like, oh, yeah, Mary Ellie is like, oh, God, thank God.

Get me off this boat. I don't want to do this anymore. They're like, no hard feelings. Can we get to land now? Please, please, please. So then we see Kathy. Kathy is in the cabin and she's like, somebody's been naughty. Because look at the pillowcase in Joe's cabin.

Captain, I mean, Bachelor Joe's cabin. There's foundation. Where there's foundation. There's a slot. So good job. who got in here last not i say lift that pillowcase to the side of kizzy's face and see if it matches yeah actually you never know kizzy kizzy could be trying to get an exit strategy going that'd be good um so captain sandy goes okay so oh so nathan let's let's do a recap okay i'm a little amped because i thought

it was the season finale of wind he was just sweeps week yeah god it was such a big episode i thought Shirley's season finale, we still got eight more episodes left. So I'm just like my heart's recent. And so I'm a little bit on fire today. And I just want to say, I walk right into the crew mess. And you're sitting there while we have guests on board. And then Joe, you know, since Joe's been on board, it's become more of a brotherly love fest. And I love that.

I love love. But you know what? We can't do this anymore. Okay. I love your friendship. But this is a fine line. It's charter four. Rally them.

Stay focused. Let them, let them see your professionalism. Okay. Give them hugs. Give them Branzina. set up a banana, do whatever you need to do, but show that you're in charge and motivate. It's like, yeah, 100%.

Captain's right. I'm in the leadership role. I can't really be as friendly as I would like to be with the deck thing. So by 1130, we're going to head back to the dock due to the weather. Okay, so guess what? I want to beat the wind. Okay, I'm going to beat the wind. Someone give me a foam finger or something.

I don't want to break the TV screen. Defense, defense. Um, so he doesn't want to let down, Captain Sandy. So, Amy, too late. Amy tells Aisha that Anna's gonna be leaving and Mary Ellie and she's like, oh, what?

So those girls leave, we're down to two. And Max is like, oh, Anna, you have to leave, you have to go, she's like, yeah, I think I was too much for that guy anyway. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Go on San Chopin now. So then Aisha's telling Josh the update. He's like, two girls have been asked to leave on the spot.

He's like, did they like gluten or did they hate gluten? Which ones were they? Well, honored Marielli, and I'm very shocked that he sent an A home. We're literally down to full guest tonight. Yes. Starts like fucking the air. He's like, yeah. He's like, unfortunately, they've all developed seafooded gluten.

allergies and also peanut allergies. It all happened last night. I hope you're okay with it, Josh. She's like, oh, no. So, um, Bachelor Joe's with Alicia and talking with him. Just more like flirting and stuff. And now we have Nathan, Kizzy and Kathy sitting around. And Kathy's like, no, can I tell you something?

There was foundation on his pillowcase. And because he's like, naughty. He's like, yeah, I bet my whole salary that he's going back to, he's going to pick her. That's the one to go for. yeah she's seen her prey and she's going for it she's asserted her dominance and kizzi's like she's pissed on him and kathy says well i was going to say sprayed by a skunk but sorry i need to learn more loose girl terms what i'm trying to say is both women left are totals sluts and skanks but meanwhile as she walks by right behind kathy's back and she doesn't see her so now are we

is talking to Bachelor Joe and we see why she stays because she saves like the good the good like gossip the good information for later in the game and so she says guess what i have a wild middle name you're never going to guess it smoker because that's badass fair enough fair enough no i guess why i never guess it smoker uh now nathan is trying to be really like in charge so it's like, all right, listen, I need you to do the railings and I need you to do the floor. Don't question me. Just do the floors. Why are you questioning me?

Yeah. And he's just, he's bossing people around. But actually, I felt like this was like good. You know, there have been times in the past where a boson gets yelled. A bosun's being irresponsible. They get yelled at. And then they go on a power trip and you can see like they were being a bad boson. And now they're going to like take it out on their team.

But I actually felt like in this situation, I felt like he's like, you know what, fuck it. I'm not going to be, I'm not going to be friends anymore. I'm going to be, you know, an authority figure. And I thought he took charge well. I thought he pivoted well. And I was like, I feel like Joe is the fucker in this situation. And he got Nathan in so much trouble. And like, he's barely even acknowledged like that it was his fault and that he's being a lazy, lazy asshole.

So I was like proud of Nathan for stepping up into his leadership space here. Yeah, except that he was also one of the. ones fucking around constantly so but yeah yeah but ultimately he was like he did tell joe you have to stay on the swim platform like and if joe had just done that one thing no one would have gotten in trouble yeah so then um work work work work work work work kathy goes to laundry and ayesha's talking to kizzy so asia's like oh my god she's just so experienced i'm real into her i just love kithy i mean i could wake up every sunday morning and read about her her adventures. That's how well-tri-loma.

Kizzy, I hope you don't mind. I printed out this mask of kaffee so you could wear her. So that way, there's two kathies. Because it's just so sad when I come around a corner, I'm like Kathy, but it's just kizzi. So now it's always kaffy. You don't mind wearing it to you. I've just started to feel that she's so talented that it's horrible to just give her one stripe. I'm going to give her five kitties. I'm just going to have little. little Keithy's printed out and put them all up and down all of our sleeves so uh Nathan's asking Max to stay on the swim platform and Nathan goes to a bitch about the situation and he's like I need to ask you something Joe took way too long to get a quick bite to eat this morning

ride and she's like yes and he's like because captain came down and there was no one on the swim platform and so I get botched and how am I going to handle that situation and she's like no you got to be more strict you got to like be on top of them like you know like and he's want to be a dick but she's like you're not being a dick you're their boss and it's okay like but you know like they make mistakes but you know what they become our mistakes and then all of a sudden max come like wandering up from the swim platform up to where they are and Nathan's like what the fuck are you doing I just told you just said the swim platform like what is wrong with like I feel like it's like the simplest thing is just to stand in this one space and these guys cannot stay put he's like but

I want to go to toilet and he's like just stay there and I'll swap out with you because we need one person on the SWIFT platform at all times. He's like, what I know, but pooh, boo-pooh, and my body. No, come on, please. Help me out here. Well, if he knows there has to be one person on the swim platform, why would he leave? Because they've been going toilet. Maybe that's why.

Ah, this is the thing that fucking winds me up. It's common sense. I'm going to have to get to that stage now where I'm just going to fucking be a dick. I'm just fucking pissed off. And then Max is on the swim platform, like, I guess you just have to squeeze it in. Yeah, unless you want to shit on the on the balloon swim platform. You will do that thing that we all do for all of our lives. You hold it in.

Yeah, you hold it, buddy. Here comes one right now. So then we go down to the galley and Aisha and Kizzy are fanning their skirts. And Aisha's like, oh, can you smell my vage? It's really wafting. Josh was like, did you say, can you smell my vage? It's really wafting. You know I'm trying to cook over here, right?

Oh, I definitely don't have a smelly badge. I just don't want people to think that. So now we go to the swim platform, and Nathan asks Max if he wants to go to the toilet now. And he's like, oh, I forgot. I will squeeze. So now Aisha is punching her vaj. And she's like, oh, she's ironclad this. van she's been three walls this one eh

hmm by the way i've got something to add to this so you know uh it's interesting guys it's time to bring the toys in toys that have not been used at all this charter uh because you know it's so interesting because the clients they look out and they say but the weather looks fine but it's coming it's coming it's like they say in the wind of thrones weather is coming okay the problem is getting stuck out there and it just starts rocking and roll and we lose our stabilize we lose an engine it's we all sink okay and then maybe you know 80 years later they make an amazing movie about us but by then we're gone

so i mean i'm sorry but we can't do this even if there is going to be a good movie so we got to go back to doc yeah listen let me tell you what no one wants captain bram okay so we go to the swim platform it's clear one and now it's and now what no one wants that just reiterating it's a very important point no one wants that so the swim platform's clear they haul the anchor and now it's time for lunch So Aisha's up with the guests and she's like, Oh, I love when the boat's moving and we're cruising. Do you smell my badge? That's all I want to know.

And Amy's like, God, I wish we could have gone swimming. Amy, what have you been doing all day long? You guys have been plopped there in the middle of the water for hours. Why did you not take a dip? So now we go to the crew mass and Max is like, oh, Kathy, you are cute without makeup. And it's like, um, did you not? think I was cute before. And he's like, oh, but I'm being honest with you. It's so honest your face with no makeup. Oh. She goes, okay. Well, apart from my fake nose, my fake boobs and my fake hair,

you mean. Oh, you're made in China. So everyone laughs. And he apologizes afterwards. He's like, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for saying that you were made in China. She's like, no, it was funny. You know, I'm a relationship girl. I don't think I've ever been single for more than three months. I can't help it. They just fall in love with me and I can't say no. What's that song? I'm just a stew who can't say no and does things really, really well better than the other stews. I love that song. And she's like, you know, I'm just, I'm obviously just so great. Hopefully it's a person and it's not just in bed, you know. But I just love having someone to talk to and share things with and travel with. But I'm just trying to learn to say no to people that I don't see a future with. So for now, we're just to about fun. So they dock. Tonight's theme is romance. And Joe is,

we see V and Joe flirting on the deck. I just don't know why she's into me. And now they're docking. No chatter. No chatter on the, on the radios. We're going to dock. We're going to do it. And they dock.

Everything's fine. Yeah. So then Bachelor Joe's like, one time I did those boat clubs and they gave me my boat. and I had a big current and I was like, whoa, let me just gun at it. And I just kind of swung in the end in and everyone was watching all having a drink like,

who's this idiot? Oh, God, that was good times, guys. And all the ladies are like, why are we with this loser? Yeah, now that they are docked and they can see land, it's like the haze is lifted and you can already see them being like, wait a second, why are we talking to this guy when there's an entire country of like super hot Spaniards?

on the other end of that pass-a-rail. Yeah. Let's just bite our time until we can get up this boat. Truly. Well, there's two girls left. Not sure who the bachelor's going to pick, but dinner's going to be ox, and I'm going to be fanning my vagina right into the middle of that conversation the entire time. The chance of endurance.

It's like the crucible and the Marines. So Nathan and, and Joe are in their, cabin changing. And Nathan's like, oh, it was quite an interesting day, bro. We can do better, bro. He's like, yeah, of course, of course. Yeah, we're good. So people are going up to dinner and everything. And Josh, this is, he's in his clan makeup. And he, uh, he's reading off his phone. He says, now that Kizier single, I'll indulge in this current tide, fully alive, eyes dilated through no fault of mine. High off sexy fumes of lavas, Santa Fehrmones. If love was that, this goes on for a while. This is the whole paragraph. I'm not.

to go through all of it he has a poem that he's reading in clown and uh you just get it he's he's so gross or entertaining for him than it is for us lavender scented fair moans if love was the drug wait until you taste me wait until you taste me now we just need five more minutes of soothing blissful fucking minutes before the alarm smashes down the stifles of silence i'm waiting for that alarm to stifle down the the stifles of silence shut the fuck up kick him off this boat. This man's a creep and he's going to hurt somebody. Yeah, seriously. So Ashley and Alicia are getting ready for dinner and they're trading notes. And Ash just like, so you've kissed them already, right? She's like, mm-hmm. I haven't kissed him. I'm going to get competitive.

Okay, girl. Well, try to compete with having a middle name that's Smokler. Wait, was that me who has Smokler's the middle name? I don't know. I don't even know which one of us is us anymore. kind of just thing. So down in the mess, Joe notices they're all there. And he's like, wait a minute, we shouldn't be in the crew mess together, should we? And Max's like, oh, we should be on swim platform. And so they go to the swim platform. So now it's cleaning, cleaning, and now, deck and Joe and Nathan.

So Nathan's like, where are you? Where are you? And he's like, I'm on standby in the crew mess. And he's like, oh, Joe, if you can keep doing the port side main deck, please. And Max, go on the starboard side on the main deck. after him we can't be sitting around lads and captain sandy's like this is ridiculous

and Joe's like okay so somewhere around here Joe is getting very salty he's like it's like a different person it's like no because you fucked up you fucked up Joe you fucked up Joe so there's more cleaning and stuff and now they're having this dinner which I guess

this is more of the valentinesy looking dinner this is all red and flowers everywhere so Ashy's like Are you looking to have more kids? He's like, yeah. I'm thinking like 10 maybe, 12. I don't know. What are you thinking?

They're like, wow, that means we have to have sex with you at least 10 times. Yeah, she's like, yeah, I'll see much time now. Yeah, bye. So then Nathan Deccanjo, he's like, so what were you actually doing when we're on the sun deck doing the carpet? And he's like, I've done bridge deck. And then I just went to crack on. He's like, bro, you can't just decide what you're going to do. You have to ask me, I'm the boss.

all right. It's like, okay, no problem. And so Nathan just kind of reads him for filth. And he just keeps saying, no problem, no problem. He's like, okay, okay. And this is when Joe's like, I'm like, who even is this person? This isn't me best mate. Who is it? Yeah, it's like, well, you fucked it up. Like, if you were, if you just like, you took advantage and now you can't complain about it because he took advantage. So Nathan's like, I'm honestly going to start to get some fucking cranky. I made this fingerprints. Look, fingerprint's here, fingerprint's there. I know we're on Charter, but don't do that. And Max, like, oh, but like the second I say here, so I say here, do I do these or this.

He's like, Max, don't fucking speak back. Just do what I say, okay? We're on Charter. Do your job. Deck hands, that can't, stainless paint. That's it. Decans, that can'ts. Max says, I feel a lack of respect, though.

Emotionally, I'm about to be a storm. He's your boss. He's your boss. Just do what he tells you to do. Do you a chap. your job. To your job. Vicky.

Vicky coming back to O.C., to your job. So then... All right, now you got a job? Do your job. Now he sends Max down for two hours. And Max is all mad. Okay, final dinner time. It's final dinner.

We're down to two girls, one old man. All for the marbles. Bachelor Joe's Marbles, specifically. Ha ha ha ha. I'm still eating popcorn. And Amy has to have... Amy has, like, her own private dinner, which is funny. She's going to have an old-fashioned burger, which is what I like to call a burger.

A burger. It's an hamburger. I'll have one of those old-fashioned, old-fashioned old-timey burgers. I was like, is that like a burger on a penny farthing? What are you talking about? It's just a burger. So they come and Ashley's like, hey, Bachelor Joe, you want to be my Valentine? He's like, whoa, the food's here.

Thank goodness. Wow, good timing with that one. Speaking of which, what do you guys think about Valentine's Day? Do I have to actually do anything special when that happens? She's like, absolutely. Like, well, at least give me some flowers. Okay, so what I'm hearing is nothing and nothing. Got it.

Won't do anything for Valentine's Day. We didn't say that. No, as far as I can hear, I'm only hearing, do another Valentine's Day. Okay, your word's not mine. Okay, great. And while we see this Valentine's Day start to unravel, we see another V-Day start to unravel when Deccan Joe's like, last season we had a laugh

we had a joke we were dancing together it was a happy vibe let's roll the clips of us trying too hard to prove to you that were bros but now he's the bosun and I have to respect his position on board I just hope it doesn't cause a rip in our friendship I hope it doesn't

get to that level yeah they probably will so they think it's yeah okay so this is the standard this is what I respect for you bro okay that's it okay I'm sorry again. I'm so sorry. So Captain Sandy, the chef makes Captain

Sandy played a dinner. And then I guess they have to show this because there's not really much in terms of dinner on this episode. Actually, if anything, the chef has a pretty easy charter because no one's eating in the first place because everyone's on like one long extended date and people don't like to

eat on dates, you know? And then there's fewer and fewer people. So he's just basically by the end of it, he's like whatever. I'm just putting out coleslaw and french fries. Yeah, I know I love it. There's like zero effort. So then Kathy and Kizzy are talking. And Kathy's like, Max notices everything about me. I mean, he went to, he went, you've got no makeup on. Like two seconds he looked at me. I might kiss Max just for the drama.

And Kizzi's like, oh, cheeky, cheeky. Let's have a three way kiss. Can't we just get drunk and share? Like, no, I haven't got enough tongue for everyone. That's my way of saying, say out of it, bitch. And Kiz's like, that's true. Well, you're going to be on the sidelines being like, let me in let me in she's like oh you're terrible note that i said i want to kiss him first so don't think i didn't don't see what you're trying to do here kizzy and kizzy's not even into max right like when did kizzy get into max well she's sort of like generally been like testing out everything

i think she was into joe but then like joe seemed to be interested in v so now she started her thing of like oh v is a crazy person v by the way they've just totally edited out of the show the past two episodes. She's just sort of a spectral presence floating in and out of the background of scenes. Well, this show is like a man, isn't it? The show's like a guy. The second you show interest, they're like, they cut you off. Yeah, exactly. Like, okay, never mind. Let's focus on Kizzy. Yeah. So then we go back to the romantic dinner. And Joe's like, well, I mean, I would want, would you want a guy that's six inches shorter to roll around with? And they're both like now. And Ashley says, well, I mean, you're all the same height when you're laying down.

Right? No. That doesn't make sense. To answer your question. No. I know what you're saying, but no. Um, so they all, um, they finished dinner with their creme brulets. And they're toasting seven years of bad sex, gotta look at each other's eyes.

And, uh, Asia's like, wow, they're having like really deep conversations, Captain Sandy. I brought these couples questions cards. And once a week, I want to do that on like a day with scored because now that we've been together for so long. so long. I get really lazy asking for stuff. Me too. You know, I'm just the same. I'll just be like, can we text it to each other?

So, I like that. I just love this whole like Captain Sandy in love season. It's so funny. They're like, wow, look, Captain Sandy smiled three times. She must be in love. So, there are people who are in cabins.

So Nathan is FaceTiming with Gail. She's like, what's been happening? And he's like, oh, it's just fucking hectic man. So honestly, Capsman on my ass. He's that way you're not sleeping? Sorry, you'll figure something out. He's like, yeah, I want to go to bed. Don't we have great chemistry?

Yeah, get some rest. Yeah, good night. The Rapporte. So now we go to Bachelor Joe with Alicia and Ashley. And now they're on the sundack on the big couch. So, Bachelor Joe's like, well, I appreciate you guys being good sports. And post yacht, here's what I want to do. I want to hang out with both of you, honestly.

Can we just do that? And then she's like, I'm hanging with both of us. I don't like that. Like, you want to just date both of us and then figure it out? He's like, I'm not asking to date both of you guys. Not like, Polly. I just like to get to know you a little bit better before. I just look, look, I just want to, I want.

But when you go to the buffet, you've got to try some things before you know where you're going to settle on for round two. It's like, well, it's not like a buffet. Well, I'm not saying it's like a buffet, but like what I'm trying to say is you both kind of remind me of food that's in a dish over a low flame. You know what I'm saying? That's literally like a buffet. Okay, well, let me see if I can better this better. I don't know. I just want to keep you both warm with cans of some lighter fluid that you like and it keeps things food warm.

That's a buffet. All right. Well, what if it's something like you just pay for, like, hey, let's go on a date. We pay for it up front and then afterwards we can have as much dating as we want afterwards. And also, you guys both hold spoons and like in the shape of a ladle. I think, weirdly, that's a buffet. That's still a buffet. So everyone's pissed at him.

Like they don't like him, they don't like this at all. And so he leaves. And Ashley's like, that was weird. That was actually like pussy energy. That's right, girls. I've been a wafting. Oh, God. I smelled that too.

Yeah, I smelled that too. Yeah, they both are not into him. And I thought they were both like saying they're not into him, but then one of them was going to be like, aha, got her off. I got her off the scent. Yeah, that's right. But then the other one was going to be like, yeah, I mean, go back to Joe. But he actually pretty old a pretty good united front on this one. Yeah.

So doesn't one of them say, oh. Oh, she goes, one of them goes, I mean, come on. You're not a priser. You're balding. I missed that. Even as a bald person, I was like, that was so rude, but also very funny. So they go to bed. And then Ashley's like, yeah, he probably has a small dick anyway.

Loser. We just keep talking shit about him. They also text Amy. I don't even think he realizes what he does. What a loser. They text Amy also and says, we both just dump Joe. So they're over it. They're over it.

So next morning, and Kizzy leaves a note with all the gossip for everyone. Next morning, Max comes out of his cabin and Kizzy runs up and jumps into his arms. Like all of a sudden, Kizzy is all about Max. She's had all this time to be about Max. She's never been about Max. And even when she was, even when she was with Tommy, she was never showed that much interest. He always seemed like he was like option number three for her. And now suddenly she's jumping into his arms.

very conveniently. And Kathy's watching like, hmm, that's strange, but okay, I see you. I see what you're up to. Yeah, interesting. So then Bachelor Joe is trying it again in the morning. So he comes up to Alicia, who's pissed. And he's like, so I'm sorry last night was so challenging. She goes, yeah, me too.

Like, that was weird. I mean, I just, I liked you. And we had a genuine connection and that's it. And he goes, fair, fair. Fair. Oh, he's so annoying. Stop trying to talk. like you're a fucking millennial sir just stop and she's like you get it and he goes well i appreciate

you trying to understand i just want to spend more time getting to know you yeah this man is in a life where he can't get attention from a woman because he's a fucking loser uh so he paid for this experience and he wants it to last longer than his time you know we've seen this man kicked out of strip clubs for you know wanting to continue his lap dance past 100 dollars multiple times no you're not going to get it okay no free trip sir backing up just a little bit two important things happen which is that ashley wakes up first and she just leaves the boat so she's already gone she goes and she gets her luggage and she leaves the boat she's like bye she doesn't say by to amy she doesn't say bye to joe she's just gone the other actually i would argue to say even

more important thing that happened is that kathy brought some rags into the galley and it's like guys, I've tried a new folds, this way these rags will fit in the cabinet better. And they do, everyone, they do. I was like, I love that Kathy is like experimenting with folds to have more efficient rag storage, especially because I guess it was last episode where she was like, you just leave the rags on the floor. And now she's actually found a special bespoke fold for the rags to fit on the shelf. So between the rag developments and Alicia leaving the boat,

or Ashley leaving the boat. It's been a pretty eventful morning. Yeah, a lot's happened. So then we go to Deccan Joe and Nathan working. And Joe's like, did you hear my YouTube last night? I was watching, do aliens exist? He's like, wow, I love a good documentary. Like, is it a documentary?

Or is it just someone on YouTube, just yamering? Wouldn't know. That's nothing I've ever done. So Alicia is going to pack and then her bachelor joe can hang out afterwards and uh v is uh we go to the deck where v is flirting with joe saying that his singing voice makes babies giggle uh she's so into me god she's so crazy look at the way she's into me god choking about my my singing voice is too much she's crazy so amy comes down and she's like joe what's going on i got a text from ashley saying alicia and i both broke up

with joe and he goes oh okay uh well i said that i'd like to get to know the more after this adventure ended and they were very unsatisfied with that response and she's like oh god you fuck this up geez i thought you were going to pick alicia he's like well we spoke more this morning and we agreed that you know we could we would connect so you know i appreciate your input she's like you're welcome joe i'm surprised i thought she was going to be like you can't say that to two women like what do you think you're doing i wanted her to smack him on the forehead but she just was like okay well he's paying me money so i'm not i'm not going to do that but this guy's really idiot. Yeah. So then it's time for guest departure and Max is talking to Kizzy and he's like,

oh, you know that way you jump on me this morning? Oh, oh, he's coming now. It is coming now. And he's talking about his boner. And he's like, oh, yeah. And she goes, oh, Max, that's huge. Oh, love that. Thank you. What is happening here? This is, this is like wild. I think in any other industry, this is called sexual harassment. But. You guys have your boner, you know? Look at my boner as it rises through my shorts. Yeah. Are they even, I don't know, whatever.

So Max is like, it's embarrassing. I'm just going to hide it with a huge suitcase. She's like, I'm lushing. He. So then, of course, she runs in and tells the other girls, Girls, I gave Max a boner. And B is like, oh, nice. I literally didn't do anything.

I just looked at him. And he went, oh, no, isn't that so funny? I'm like, oh, my God, you're awful. Kathy just rolls her eyes and she's, it's fucking humongous girls. I was like, oh, Vive la France. Kathy's just like, what is happening? What is happening? It's a bitch move.

I'm going to say that right now. Maybe that's a wrong word. That sounds mean. It's, that's not a, that's not a women supporting women move. She was, she was basically like, guess what, Kathy? I got him to get a boner. You're out of the running. I was like, you're so mean.

Yeah, but if she's, if someone told me, oh, this guy just told me I gave him a boner and showed me his boner, I wouldn't be like, you know what? I can't wait to pursue that man later. So, Kathy, you know. I know. There's that too. But this was, this was like, this was a mean girl move for sure. So she runs around telling everyone she gave him a boner. And they're like, wow, congrats.

She's like, yeah. I did. So now it's time for crew departure, and Max runs out last. His shirt is still unbuttoned. God knows why. Probably trying to cover his bone, bone. And Bachelor Joe tells Amy that Ashley left, and Amy's really offended that she didn't even get a goodbye.

Dun, done, done. So they walk off together. They're pretty boring. And he's just like, is that it? I just wanted this to have this big, grand moment, you know? Joe picks his girl. They kiss. They run off the boat.

together. It's just deflated and weird. Like my penis. I'm looking at nobody now. It is like a weird walk-off because like Alicia just sort of has her hand in like his arm. Like he's kind of escorting her a little bit. It's just strange. Is that love? Is that what it's supposed to look like? This awkward hobble down the marina? Okay. So now. things happen as people start working and all that good stuff.

It's the tip meeting. Deccan Joe thinks his legs look like tampon strings and Kizzy's sniffing her own foot. And so now we go into the main salon and Captain Sandy comes in. She's like, wow, charter for, unlike any other charter we've ever done. So the first thing I want to do, I want to welcome Kathy. Kathy, I love your comic. Say it for me. Say what?

You know what to say? I don't. Do it. No. Egg. Damn it. God, that's going to follow me around for the rest of my life. I have felt so welcome by everyone here.

And you're just the most incredible audition. You're so experienced. You really know what you're doing. And you're pretty cool to top it off. And I bet for as many bonuses that Kizzy gets from Max, you probably get 10 more bonus from actual interesting and handsome people. Thank you for being amazing. Yeah, you're so good.

All right, Dak. Well, you know it's all coming. I'm very disappointed. Now, V, I'm going to leave you out of this situation because you're one of my favorite shows, okay? I was kind of rooting for the aliens. I'm not going to lie. Okay, now the rest of you, I love bromance, okay?

And I don't want to be a joy kill, okay? You know, was that backwards? Maybe. But this is a job. And I've put the pressure on Nathan, and you're going to feel it because he's feeling it. for me. Now, I haven't said that. I'm giving you the day off tomorrow. Okay. Did you earn it? No. But you know what? I have to compliment you. Not a one of you is Hannah. So you win. Okay. Good job.

So then it's time to turn the boats over and everything and people working hard. The tip is 25 grand, which is decent. Decent. Yeah. Decent. I think that's all right. That's fine. He had dwindlead numbers. That's good. um so everyone's working hard and so asia kizzy and kathy meet on the bow and she's like i just want to say thank you so much for making me proud every single day you're so experienced and kathy you've been a chief stew now i'm wondering would you care to air out your vagina also we could do it in tandem then i'll know you're really my sister she's like um cool because he's like yeah you're a lot more experienced than i am and i actually feel just ridiculous at you having one stripe on your shoulders so i was thinking you've given you two

stripes and making you both seconds too how do you feel about that and um kizzy fakes it she's just she's like i'll just fake it she's like oh my god i'm so excited for you girl she gives her a big hug and she's like thank god she took it so well i mean that has been the biggest blessing for me Fucker, fucker, fucker, yeah. So now everyone is hanging out and people are doing face masks and everything and Kizzy's putting a face mask on Kathy and Kathy's like, you know, I get a little bit of a vibe from Kizzy. She's like that she's threatened by me, you know, you know, two boats ago, my rotational chief choose two partner. She had been there, you know, a lot longer than me. You know, I came on guns blazing, coming up with new folds for rags, changing everything and we just butted heads.

But looking back, I was wrong in that situation. And now I know to be a little bit more understanding. And I want to do things in a nice way where I'm showing her at the time a team player. So if she wants, we can throw all the rags on the floor and make this place look like a style, just the way she's been doing it all along. So now everybody gets ready for the night out. And Kizzy's like, well, I'm single now. And I've got three very sexy deck boards.

I'm just ready to have some fun. By the way, did you hear that she's marrying Tommy? I heard that she was engaged. Is it Tommy? Wow. That's crazy. Yeah, she's engaged to Tommy. So, I'm looking forward to the divorce.

Max sees her and he's like, oh, let the dog out. Woof, woof, woo, woo, woo, woo, okay. And Josh is purring like a cat. And so then we go to Nathan and Joe's cabin and Joe's wondering what V is wearing. And Nathan's like, she's quiet, entia, bra. She's quiet to intia. So now we got one van with screaming wild people. And the other van is Josh, Kathy, Kizzy.

calmly doing content or whatever. And Aisha tells Max, Kizhi told me that she was quite impressed by your very large cock this morning. He goes, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, big hook. And Joe's like, oh, Kizzy's all over you, brother. And Aisha's like, Kathy thinks you're pretty cute. You've got some room to play tonight. Yeah.

So they're like, oh, it's just six weeks. Let's just have some fun. So then Max is like, oh, you just need. It's clear communication. It is only sex. So then in the other van, Kizzi's like, oh, I think the drama's about to start now. Yeah, the drama.

Drama's going to hip in right now. So now everyone gets down to dinner. And V is telling the table, everyone looks hot tonight and they order espresso martinis. And it's like a typical, like, below deck dinner. Lots of banter back and forth. And Joe wants to talk to V. So he's like, I want to tell you this before to go any further what I'm after.

It's just like a little bit of fun and stuff like that. You know what I mean? Yeah, no strings attached. Yeah, that's good to know. Like I can't afford to hurt anyone. Uh, yeah. So stop falling in love with me. Oh my God, what are you so into me?

She's like, um, I've been so heartbroken that nothing can come close and you're an adult and I'm an adult and I'm going to be fine. So I won't marry, I won't marry. I'm telling you now, so Jesus Christ. So then, let's see. So then Aisha is talking to Kathy and she's, what are they talking about? Oil and bread? Because Max shows them some garlic bread.

He's putting butter on. And Aisha's like, do you think you felt like you've deepened your relationship? Look how it's buttering the oiled bread. I do. I feel like it could be deeper though. So now that's time for the guys to go on a smoky-bokey. And Kathy's like making sure her hair is good, you know, because she's going to be making a move on Max later. So Max is like, he puts his hands around her shoulders as he walks by and he's like, I love that.

This is the best part of you because you are like a bit sassy, but at the same time you're classy. That is what I love. You're sassy and classy and glassy like olive oil and butter and garlic bed. And she's like, we're just gravitating towards each other. And I feel like we're at our own separate table. I mean, I feel a connection with him. and I can just see the night is going to unravel. Oh, God, maybe my clothes will.

Oh, cheeky. So everyone's taking photos, and Joe's like, I'm in a fucking pickle. And Nathan's like, you're always in a pickle. So he says, listen, I haven't got an objective. I've got no objective. I'm just a very open man. But when I seek to Victoria, it fucking kind of changes

because I do really feel like she's into me or whatever. She wants to have me baby. And I said, I'm not ready. I'm still pretty much a baby myself talking about my grandfather. How do I even have a baby in this world? I don't know. I'm just speechless. Nathan's like, that never happens to you, bro.

He's like, I know, I know. Why does she want to have me baby? So he's like, I don't want to hurt the woman. So he says that he's not ready for a relationship, but this girl's such a sweetheart, and he can see her meeting me mom and stuff like that. But I don't want to feel that way. That's the battle.

Fuck, what am I going to do? fuck someone else what else would you do she's just like yeah i'm not into anything too deep either oh my god she's obsessed so so then they're taking photos they're having fun espressor martinis all that fun stuff nathan starts talking to josh and he's like i had a rough charter it's like yeah you had a rough time he's like yeah captain just came down to me big time bro but like the team as well and they were complaining about a cleaning every 20 minutes we're getting fucking two grand bro every two or three nights you know So Nathan's just saying that the stress is just so much.

And we just, he needs to focus on trying to get back to drive of determination because, you know, he's never been faced with this kind of situation before, you know. And then we go to Kathy and Kizzy and Kathy's like, I want to kiss Max. I'm going to go kiss him tonight. Who are you going to kiss Kizzy? And she just shrugs. And we see Joe and V flirting. And Kathy's like, I'm going for the kill tonight.

And Kizzy says, yeah, but she's, oh. and she's making it look like she wants to go for Joe, but V is on Joe. So Kathy's like, well, I mean, just maybe you could flirt with him, so she backs off a little bit. And I was like, uh-oh, Kathy, you just gave her an excuse to do whatever she wants

because you just said that to her. So now she can just say, well, you were the one who told me I could just go flirt with Joe when you knew that he was with V. Don, don't, don't. So Kathy is like, Like, um, I think his eyes are not fixated.

What, what do you think about us? Well, they're just talking about the boys. So now Joe pays for dinner. They go out. They go back to the boat. They go to the jacuzzi. You're going to go to the jacuzzi. And everyone's talking.

And, uh, like, there's more talk about like, you like him. You like him. Like him. So now we're, so we're, we're approaching this jacuzzi. Everyone gets in. And they're having fun times, fun drunk time in the jacuzzi. Um, Max has a watermelon that he drops everywhere. It's like fun times.

Everyone's drunk. This chaos happening. Josh, Josh gets in the jacuzzi, and then he actually just gets naked in the hot top. He's just full on naked. So I don't know if that's going to put him into the race with Kizzy. And I'm going to actually, no, I do know. It's, it's not, it's not going to help at all. So V is kind of flirting with Joe.

She's all over him. And he's, he goes to kiss him, but he doesn't kiss her. And he's like, I'm utterly petrified, if I'm honest. And V's like, you scare me so much. And he says, why? And she's like, oh, my God. you scare me so bad i want to fight you and then max keeps taking shots

and basically they're like can you believe we're on a super at super yacht and then kizzy is now hanging out of the hot tub and max is grabbing her butt and stuff and kathy's just kind of looking like what the hell's going on and then boom they start making out and kathy's like what the fuck yeah and she's like i'm out and she's like i i checked out as much as i like too bad. I'm going to get out. I'm going to bid. And Maxo, Kathy. So now they're going to have a day off. They can go to the day club or whatever.

And there'll be tension in the air. What will happen? Done. Done. Don. All right, everybody. Thanks so much for joining us for Below Dick Mead. Below Dick Mead. What a fun time. Yes. We will be back with more stuff all this week. Thanks for being here. We'll talk to you next time. Bye everyone.

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