Watch What Crappens - #3095 Below Deck Med S10E10 Part 1: Who’s The Boss?
Episode Date: December 2, 2025This is part one of twoThis week on Below Deck Mediterranean, Captain Sandy wants Nathan to be a boss. Can he do it? Not really. Also, Joe is trying something new for the first time: an...nouncing that he’s doing something new! To watch this recap on video, listen to our bonus episodes, and participate in live episode threads, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Tis the season to save money. And the best way to save is signing up for Racketon. With Racketon,
you can make your list and save on it twice. Shop for holiday deals at your favorite stores like
Adidas, Best Buy and Sephora, and then get cashback on top of the sale price. That's Savings on
savings. You can check off everyone on your list, including yourself. Join for free today. Just go to
Racketon.ca, download the app, or install the browser extension. That's R-A-K-U-T-E-N.
Crap, Crap, Watch what happens when there's so much than Crapins.
Hello and welcome to Watch What's What?
crapins, a podcast about all that
crap on Bravo that we just love to talk
about. I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me
today, this morning.
Oshardwee, it's Mr.
Ronnie Karam. Hi, Ronnie. How are you?
Well, hello, Ben.
How are you, huh?
I am just great
because it's below deck
med days. Yes.
Yes. First of all, thanks
to Jeff Lewis and Company
for having me on their show today with the
wonderful Julia Cunningham.
Fortunately, Ronnie could not be there because he's in Texas.
But his spirit was felt, and coincidentally, we decided to match each other on crap is on demand today.
We're both wearing shades of orange and brown for the fall.
YAS.
And it's sort of like stripy, too.
So speaking of crap is on demand, come watch us on Patreon.
Patreon.com slash watch for crappins.
And you can access their crap is on demand where you can watch us.
But the videos do actually wind up eventually on YouTube.
so go subscribe to our YouTube channel as well.
We have bonus episodes on Patreon.
I don't know what this week's is going to be.
Maybe a chatty one.
Who knows?
I don't think there's any trailers coming out anytime soon.
Probably just some good old-fashioned life updates.
Yeah, we could talk about Thanksgiving.
We made, what we cooked, what we did, what we shopped for, et cetera, et cetera.
All my Cyber Monday stuff has all arrived right before this.
It's like still all wrapped up and I just want to tear into it.
I think that's all the stuff that's like worth mentioning for me.
news that's fit to print all the news that's fit to print by the way thank you to everyone who came to
crappy hour last night we had a really fun one we were really gaping away so much so that we almost
we almost went over uh that was super fun and of course every monday we do uh it's now every monday
it's not every other it's every single monday we're now doing our little amazon live show
where we give our recommendations on things that you might want to get so yeah that's that's that for that
I don't I feel like there was something else I wanted to say I wanted to express I want to happy
birthday to my dad happy birthday to my dad it's his birthday today so happy birthday wow and happy almost
birthday to you there's two days left until the birthday of benjamin mandelker everybody two days left
very very exciting yeah I'm spending my birthday by going to see alison roman at the will turn
theater in Los Angeles so that's amazing that's like your hero I know my hero my personal
hero yeah um that's basically it
Yeah, well, today is below deck med, season 10, episode 10, bowing out.
Don, don, don, y, y, y, y, y, yon, y, yon, who bows out?
Nobody bowed out.
But it's because the bow thruster went out.
Girl, you can't call it an episode bowing out and not fire somebody.
That's a firing turn.
It could also be bowing out, okay?
Whoa.
Someone is like, don't bow at me, okay?
Like Leon Locken said one time.
Don't bow with me.
yellows. Don't boy with me. But that's, none of those things happen. Okay. Well, we start where we left off. It is mayhem on the yacht because Max has gotten in the tender with that fucking horrible human being Imron and let Imron drive the tender. And then Captain Sandy saw it. And she's like, wait a minute. What the heck's going on in that tender? You get back on this boat. Hey, monk hair. Get down there and tell that guy to get back here. Oh, by the way, someone tweeted at us that.
But monk hair, where's his name?
Nathan.
Nathan.
Cut his hair.
You guys, it's so cute.
That is the biggest news I have to report from this week.
He shaved his head.
And you know, sometimes that is the best thing a man can do.
The man looks fine.
He looks hot.
Go ahead.
So argue with the hot.
Yeah, I'm going to.
I'm going to.
I like that he changed his haircut.
I just, I don't love the one that he landed on.
If anything, I feel like it makes him look a little bit like that guy, Luke,
who was on below deck down under who,
got drunk and tried to make a move
on Margo. And so
that makes me uncomfortable.
Try to rate Margo. Do you mean? Yeah. I just
feel like it. You know what? Maybe
he could bring it a little tighter on the sides.
I think Nathan is so cute. I was actually
like reflecting. I was like, he is
so cute.
And I just like I just feel like he's
so close to having the right hair, even with
the new revision. But it's still
not quite there for me.
Well, I loved it. So good for you, Nathan.
Thanks for all your hard work on your
follicles. It really worked for me. So Captain Sandy's like, hey, listen, Nathan, you guess can't
drive the tender, okay? And she's like, this isn't a free for all. Get your fucking shit together
on this deck. You understand? Okay. And he's just staring at her, like, but I work so hard.
And she's like, get Max back to the board. So he calls Max back. This isn't like Norma at Burlington
Coat factory. It's not a free for all, okay? Get back to the boat. This isn't like Norma
County Fair, not everyone gets a free ride, all right?
Get that boat back in the slot.
What's the opposite of a blue ribbon?
Who wins their ribbon anyway? The cow or the owner?
Not to take away any enormous joy, but.
Oh, I'll tell you who's going to get a blue ribbon.
Me, after I rib Norma a little bit more, am I right?
Okay.
That's what you call a blue ribbon.
ribbon. Hey, Nathan, you know what you need to be? A boss. Okay? That can never happen again. You got to ask. Okay? And he goes,
well, he took initiation to get him on to the tender, though. She's like, well, that's when you pause him,
because you're in charge, all right? You need to derinda his ass. And after this, he can bring the
slide out, and I'm pointing at you. You like that? I'm going to point at you, and I'm going to
emphatically point multiple times in this sentence, and I'm not going to really move my mouth a lot.
When I talk, I'm just going to show you my teeth. You got it? Yeah, be a boss. Okay. Be a
I'm going to tell you this about 25 more times over the course of the next hour.
Be a boss.
Okay, pretend your first name's Hugo.
Be a boss.
Get to it.
Fuck sick.
I'm sick of this fucking shit, bro.
I'm getting sick from doing that's bullshit.
And Joe's like, you're doing fantastic, bro.
And he's like, it's bullshit.
He's like, Max, get to the fucking boat.
So Nathan's like, yeah, the captain's coming down on me so hard.
You know, you're that stupid to let the guests drive the tender.
I feel you.
You're fucking wanting me fired at this stage.
So he's like, Max, the gas can't drive the tender ever.
He's like, okay, he's like, no, he can't leave the boat without telling the captain either.
Okay, but Captain Sainty was mad?
He's like, yeah, she came at me like this.
She started pointing her finger and saying, be a boss a lot, a lot of being the boss.
She even said, who are you?
Tony Danza?
Who's that the boss?
I don't even know what that means.
Something about a cow not deserving blue ribbons?
I'm not really sure, but don't take the tender.
Something about, hey, Angela, and I didn't know what that meant, but whatever.
something to do with the boss.
I don't know.
Get back here.
Well, I understand what he's saying, but you know, I don't know what I'm doing.
It's far from the wheel, eh?
Oh, just breathe.
Just breathe.
You're barely touching the wheel, eh?
Hmm.
So Aisha is telling the girls that the cabins are ready to be clean.
And Kathy's like, pleasure, treasure instead of copy, which, you know, so cat.
That's so Kathy.
Pleasure treasure.
That is so Kathy to rewrite the rules and have it work out.
her favorite nobody said anything you know why because kathy is a boss bitch okay is the boss
that's who captain sandy wants you to be would would kathy be out there letting somebody else
drive the tender no she would be name renaming that fucking tender to pleasure that treasure
be a kathy so now uh captain sandy walks up to nathan i guess what she says be a boss be a boss
Yeah, boss. Be a boss.
My favorite shows in your ear.
It's the wind.
The wind is whispering to you.
Be a boss.
Do your food.
Be a boss.
Do your food.
You know, there's even babies out there that are bosses.
Boss babies.
Okay, he like them.
Brought in a lot at the box office.
Okay.
Guess what box baby wouldn't do.
Be not a boss.
Also, guess what he wouldn't do?
Wouldn't let somebody drive a tender.
It's not supposed to because he's a boss.
Okay, be a boss.
Hey, you know who I root for in Super Mario Brothers, Bowser?
Because he's a boss.
Okay, he's a boss.
Have you seen the new preview for the Super Mario Brothers sequel?
Yes, because it was attached to Wicked.
Well, I assume it was attached to Wicked. I did definitely see that, yes.
It was attached to Wicked. Yeah, they made Bowser a tiny little version of Bowser.
I guess they turned him into a toy. No, I don't want them emasculating Bowser.
How's Bowser? Just because you're small doesn't mean you're less of a man.
Oh, really? Then why?
was he walking backwards and going,
just sorry guys,
sorry guys,
didn't mean it.
Well,
that's his own issues.
That's to do with his trauma.
That has nothing to do with him being a man.
If you're small,
you can still be a full man.
He's a short king now,
okay?
And now I never saw the first
Supermarry Brothers movie,
which I actually do want to see.
But I do,
I am curious how Bowser got to be like that.
By the way,
did your Wicked also have the message
from Cynthia and Ariana before?
Yeah,
I didn't like it.
That was the worst part of the movie.
What the fuck was that?
What was that?
We just want you to know that we are friends, too.
And after this movie, we hope you can be friends with someone.
Yeah.
I hope everybody's friends here.
We just want to thank you so much for coming on our journey with us.
This has been so wicked, bro.
Get the fuck out of here.
You're taking me out of this.
It has been the journey of a lifetime to have to go through so many press tools with this little twit by my side.
And I can't wait until I can finally go back to Lena and never talk to Ariana again.
I have a nail as large.
is this idiot. Please end this press tour.
She does have long nails. Great movie now. Great film. Yeah. I cry. You know, you know why?
Because you know what that wicked witch is? The boss. She's a boss. She's a bass. You know what?
She's a bass. She's a boss. Be a bass. He's like, come. I just can't see that far. You know,
how am I supposed to tell him not to do it if I can't even see him out there? Well, you should
know where he is and not be horse playing and sticking pink.
He's up your best friend's bum over there, Joe.
Mm-hmm.
Exactly.
Because remember he was inside when this happened.
Yeah.
Captain Sandie was like, hey, Nathan, he didn't come outside and do your job.
And if you're going to do the job, you know what position you should be as someone at the job?
I'm going to say you right now.
It's not entry level.
It's the boss.
Be a boss.
Don't be a Hugo.
Be a boss.
Okay.
Pressure makes us better because when you apply that pressure and you have that expectation from a
crew member, they step into it or they get a heroin addiction like Hannah. But you know what?
It's a challenge for them. And they see your belief in them. And when you have that belief in
someone, they don't want to, they don't want to disappoint you or themselves. There's no love for
the wicked. There's no love for the non-bosses. I love when Captain Sandy gets on her like
women empowerment. These are, this is a moment for my woman.
Women Empowerment Speech that I last gave it
a Marriott Marquis somewhere in Oklahoma.
Be a boss.
Be a boss fest.
Be a boss coming soon to Amazon Kindle.
Color soft only. Color soft
only.
Captain Sandy looks at the
toys that she always demands.
This is what Captain Sandy does.
She's always like, okay, the moment this boat
stops moving, you put out every single
toy that's on this boat. It doesn't matter
what size or shape. It's always in the water.
She looks out and she goes, looks at a, she looks at some sad toy.
She goes, that's pathetic, isn't it?
What a magnetic toy.
God, I didn't even want to put it out.
It's not pathetic.
She goes, yeah, it's embarrassing.
You know what?
It's not ever going out again.
Not ever.
Like Max on the tender.
Hey, toy.
Be a boss.
Be a boss.
I'm a like a maca, maca, maconacabah, be a boss.
Ama lacke neck and me a maid.
Be a boss.
All right.
So now we're getting ready for dinner.
family style and included in this family style is someone who was robbed of their family a daddy pig
who has been slaughtered and spayed out in all of his whole pig glory that's disgusting that was a baby
pig there's a pig let he was a babies can be fathers baby have babies having babies ever heard of
it ever had sex ed class god teen teenage pig pregnancy is really that's an issue
i'll tell you pigs protect yourselves
Guess what? That pig was not a boss. Definitely not a boss.
Well, I didn't like this. It was disgusting.
And so he's got foil on his ears and tails. It was just very disgusting.
And, um, gross. And so, uh, and he's not only doing that. He's also doing octopus and ham.
More ham, more pig. Just kill the whole fucking family. Why don't you? It was like grandma down there.
She killed grandma. I mean, who's, who's the alpha banal, right?
I would listen to the stupid New York Times podcast, the daily, because it was about wicked.
And I was like in a mood, okay, because I had just seen wicked.
So I was like, oh, I wonder what they're saying about wicked.
And it was these three people basically bitching about wicked, which how dare you, okay?
And one of them was like, what's the alphabet thing anyway?
I mean, her whole storyline is like rooting for animals.
I don't get it.
I don't get like the whole animal activism story.
Sir, they were animals that talked and had rights like.
humans and then they were taken away.
What are you confused about?
How is the New York Times confused about the plot of Wicked?
It's a pretty simple plot.
And he's like, and guess what?
I don't understand the political structure of Oz.
Sir, you don't even understand the animals can speak.
That's fair.
I do think it's kind of crazy to question why she's into the animals.
Like the animals were like intelligent creatures who were autonomous and then they were robbed
of like their rights and their voice.
Like it's a pretty obvious.
Pretty on the nose, sir.
pretty on the nose, pretty on the, on the, on the, on the whiskered nose.
But I do agree that the, like, how Oz functions as a city is a little strange.
Like, because it existed before Jeff Goldblum got there, right?
Well, he wasn't a leader.
He was just like a, you know, I know, but like who was running a celebrity with, with a voice.
Also, I feel like Ms. Marble should have, like, put up a stronger fight.
Like, I feel like she should have been like, this is mine now.
Yeah, Mrs. Marble was just like, foiled.
Oh, well.
Guess I'm going to jail.
Like, what the hell?
You got nothing up your sleeves?
Yeah, you got, you're literally a witch.
You could make a tornado, but like when the Wizard of Oz leaves in his balloon, you're just going to stand there.
Like, oh, well, that was fun while it lasted.
I guess off to watch Family Feud.
Why did we just spoil the end of Wicked?
We're going to get trouble for that.
All I said, well, I mean, everyone knows Ms. Morval's going to get what's coming to her.
Right.
I'm just saying, I believe in her.
She's won an Oscar.
Listen, if she conjured up tornadoes like that all the time, she was so beautiful and graceful, I don't know why we're rooting against her.
Just keep spoiling away.
Just keep on.
You just keep throwing more of logs on the spoil fire.
There's nothing spoiler that she makes the tornado.
Uh-huh.
I didn't know she did it.
If I saw that movie, I'd have been like, when's she going to make the tornado?
This movie's ruined for me.
Oh, something to look forward to.
Something to look forward to now.
Also, Dorothy's a skank.
Okay, so Aisha goes to talk to Josh about dinner.
Okay, so we see this dead pig.
I'm still not happy.
And Josh, the murderer is like, well, the guests want this really authentic Spanish experience.
And, you know, he goes on his whole food thing, explaining food and blah, blah, blah.
And he doesn't want to kill the pig, but he's trained himself to not look at the pig emotionally.
And so he does it anyway.
Well, you know what?
You're just following orders, I suppose.
Deep.
It's time for a commercial.
It's time for a craft.
Hello, I'm Matt Ford.
And I'm Alice Levine and we're the hosts of Wondry's podcast British Scandal.
In our latest series, Michelle Mone, we tell the story of a woman from Glasgow who left school at 15 and devised an idea.
A next level bra that remoulds the cleavage.
An uplifting story which gives you a real boost. I hate myself.
She moved from business to politics and when COVID hit says she knows a great company to
supply PPE. And the company, PPE MedPro, made millions of pounds of profit from the contract.
Oh, and a lot of the equipment was unusable. Oh, a minor detail. And having said that she had
nothing to do with that profit repeatedly, she then goes on national television and says that
her and her children are actually in line to receive nearly 30 million pounds as a result of it.
To find out the full incredible story, follow British scandal wherever you listen to podcasts,
or listen early and add free on Wondery Plus.
So now we go back to Nathan talking to Max and Joe,
and Nathan is like,
I was told to be a boss.
Am I not being a boss?
Yes, you are very much a boss.
Yes, yes, you're a boss.
Yeah, the most boss thing you can do is be like,
guys, am I a boss?
Guys, am I bossy enough?
Like, I'm like, I'm like boss enough for you.
Hey, hey, V, get over.
over here.
Okay.
I want to show you something.
Do these jeans make my butt look boss?
Just.
Guys,
if I listen to Fergie sing bossy,
does that make me a boss?
So Captain Sandy's like,
that makes you an old queen mate.
Very old queen.
Bossy bossy.
So Sandy is like,
Hey,
V, look at that pathetic float.
Look at that.
Look how stupid that float is.
It's like not even a boss.
All these floats are bosses,
but not that float.
I mean,
we're never going to put that float out again.
ever ever again look at it the worst float of all time why is it even here get it out was wind pulled off the air what are you doing on the deck this much in one episode go back to your room how don't you also never noticed that toy before it's like it's your toy yeah so um Nathan's like well I just want to know that my team is on the same wavelength the people that I work with you know they're like oh you look like a boss sir it's such boss such a big boss and now Kizzy is talking to Josh
in the galley for her daily dose of attention.
And she's like, Kathy's on morning.
She still spends a lot more time outside than I do.
But maybe that's a me thing.
I don't know.
Kissy.
Like, you literally have had, like, the entire season to, like, talk and schmooze with stupid
people, stupid guests.
And now you have, like, a day and a half of being downstairs and you're having a
mental breakdown.
Like, I've had enough of you.
I like Josh's answer.
He goes, I don't know.
I don't see.
I'm always down here.
It's like someone complaining.
It's like someone at prison who only gets an hour in the yard complaining to somebody in solitary confinement.
I know.
That's right.
I only got an hour to do aerobics today in the yard and like taking the sun.
Like, look, I have like a farmer's stand on my arm.
He's like, I've been a solitary confinement.
What are you even doing down here?
But Asia's thing is to make it fair and you take turns and I haven't spent any time with the guests because I've been in the cabins all this time.
He's like, well, next charter's, Kizzy's turn.
Here she is, boys.
Here she is world.
Okay, let's settle down.
Go do the laundry.
So, V and Joe have their little flirting scene
because that's why people watch below deck guys.
It's to watch people like flirt and convince each other that they're in love when they
never fucking are.
And so then we go back to the crew mess where Kizzy's folding towels and Aisha comes down.
And she's like, Kizzy Troll.
You seem off again today. What is it? Your teeth are frowning. I just, I was used to being a
right hand man and now I feel like I'm useless because all I'm doing is laundry and crying down
here. I mean, Kathy, she's a better stew than I am. Am I fishing for compliments? No, of course
not. She's just so good and I'm just so bad. I don't think you should say she's a better stew than you
are the rest of us say it enough darling you don't have to go so hard on yourself
well she just has more experience than i do oh i'm sad not sexually
there there there there you know this is literally go ahead me oh thank you you're so
kind of me this is literally what i was trying to avoid by making kathy's second
too and i wanted to create one big interior happy family that's all falling apart thanks to me
i have to say aisha's style is very very good as a leader her leadership style is so good she never
backs down and she never really kisses their ass like she wants like she didn't say no she's not a
better stew than you are you kidding you're fucking amazing girl you're so good she just said yeah you shouldn't
say that about yourself you know she never took it back or when she said last week like yeah last
week you know she did that whole thing which was talking about me and she's like well i would say it to
your face but you're also very pretty and i like the bows that you put in your hair occasionally
in addition to being an awful slut horrible person who screws over other women in favor of me
all right this is a good talk i believe her cold her cold her cold
Reed was like, I absolutely love you and I'm so happy you've come into my life and you're absolutely
wonderful stew. And all those other things are true as well.
It's so slick. I love it. And so Kizzy, she's like, oh, I'm going to give Kizzy some love
and concentrated attention. And she's, pretend she's cradling a little baby. She's like,
I kind of worry for the baby, to be honest.
I know.
Aisha's really good.
You know, have you heard of the compliment sandwich?
Aisha does the open face compliment sandwich.
So a compliment sandwich is you say something nice to someone and then you give a critique and then you have, say, another compliments.
That way, like, the critique is palatable.
Be like, you know, you are so wonderful.
Everything you do is great.
You could be faster in laundry.
but I think that you know you have such a great spirit and like it's like a little more palatable
but I like that Aisha does the open face where she gives a compliment and then she's like yeah but you're
you're terrible yeah I see the carb free I do the carb free compliment sandwich where it's just
criticism and then I charge your ass gratuity at the end maybe you add like a no you'll add like
a compliment a condiment I think I'll just be like get a mint on your way out they're by the
host is stand i'd have i just give i just give like a compliment dinner role and then afterwards
people discover that the role was made of me all along because i'm they realized you put something
they were allergic into the roll they're like wait a minute oh was that peanut he insulted me
he wasn't even here he insulted me i was like well i said the nice thing to your face though
all right guys captains on my ass i'm bringing the
professionalism and the guest shouldn't drive tenders it's unacceptable okay i think they got that part
nathan i think the part that nathan's not getting is the reason he was on the tender without you seeing
is that you were fucking around in the mess that's what you're not seeing it wasn't the actual thing the
thing the thing that you were doing so they already know that they shouldn't be taking the 10
guests on tenders so he also would benefit i think from having like a little bit of a stern
in conversation with this crew.
Be like, guys, I love you all.
You're all my mates, but
you're all messing up. And I'm
catching the heat for it. And I'm the one that looks bad.
You guys have to get it together. Okay, I don't want to
see this. I don't want to see that. I don't want to see
this or that. You all look great, by the way.
Compliment sandwich. But no,
you're shitting. You're shitting the bed. Like, I kind of think
he needs to give some tough love now. The
time has come. Yeah.
So now everybody's getting ready for dinner.
We see Imron, the asshole in the mirror
going, damn, I'm good looking.
But listen, if you be your, be your own hero, you know what I mean?
Your own boss.
Yeah.
Your own boss.
So they go to dinner.
And, and Imran's talking to Kathy.
And he's like, you know, we give kudos for men and women in their 20s for being so positive and energetic.
And it's hard to find that within the 20 to 20 year olds, you know.
But I know this because I did all of them.
She's like, I, these just go away.
Yeah.
He's so gross.
So Patricia Jha, the co-primary, comes and Asia's like,
oh my God, baby delicious, amazing.
Love your rack.
And then Kathy, Max is flirting with Kathy, you know, as usual.
And she's like, I enjoy the flirt.
I enjoy the attention.
It's not that deep, really.
But to me, that's normal.
and we are going to have some very strange
here's some strange context to why
below deck backstory
Now don't you wish they had the Instagram walls now
So you could see Kathy's Instagram wall
Because I'll bet they're like
I'm in a bikini in a taxi cab
No I don't want to see an Instagram wall
What I want to see is whoever is typing Kathy's backstory into chat GPT
Because I'm telling you all these backstores make no sense
So she's here she is explaining
why she enjoys flirting and why it's not that deep.
She literally goes from, to me, that's normal.
Like, flirting, that's normal.
My mom owned a taxi company when I was growing up.
She was so busy.
I was left alone quite a lot.
We've never eaten dinner at a table as a family,
but I don't think of it as sad.
That's just really what made me quite an independent person.
Sweet.
What does that have to do with you being a flirt?
Like, my mom had a taxi company,
so they're from quite the flirt now.
So weird.
I guess you're used to picking people up.
I mean, I don't know.
What does it mean?
I'm always fair.
You know, I concentrate on fair.
Can't kick me to the curb, but get it.
They show a picture of her, and she's a teenager, I guess, and she's in these huge braces.
Like, I didn't know they made braces this big.
I have to say, I've never seen someone look exactly the same when they're a teenager.
Usually people look a little different.
It's exactly her, but with braces.
It's crazy.
What a cute little face.
My mom owned a taxi cab company when I was young.
Teeth is like braces.
I mean, the backstories on Blowdeck are getting crazier and crazier.
I mean, we were just barely getting over last week's confession from Joe that he was in real estate 10 years ago and got the frauded and then lived in his car.
I was so ashamed of it that he broke up with his girlfriend and hasn't been able to.
able to open his heart ever since he got defrauded because someone stole the furniture in the
place he said, well, eating entire loaves of bread while he's taking selfies.
So she kisses Max, good night. And then Aisha asked Captain Sandy to help her run plates. I'll do it
because I'm a team member. You know what? That's what bosses do. And then, uh, Kizzy's sent back down
to cabins. And she's wearing a different outfit because she wanted to be included in dinner, but
Sorry, you're back in cabins, Cinderella.
So then the suckling pig comes the table.
So everyone's excited.
And Josh introduces what the meal is.
He's carving up the meat.
And I did think of you, Ronnie.
I was like, God, this is probably not.
Ronnie probably hates this right now.
Yeah, you know, I can't be too.
I'm just kidding when I'm like, murderer,
because I can't be too judgmental because I still eat fish.
And there are people too.
But, yeah, I don't know.
It's just gross when it's like the whole animal.
I actually started reading this book.
that a vegan suggested to me,
and it's called Tender is the Flesh.
And it's about a world in which all the animals get diseases.
And so people start dying because they're eating animals.
So they have to kill all the animals.
So they kill all the animals.
And then people start, it becomes legal to eat people.
So they start breeding human beings just to eat.
So there's like a class of humans that's just for food.
And then a class of humans that is breeding these animals.
Okay.
So you know, you can see.
the heavy-handed lessons there, I'm sure, without me going into it. I had to stop this book. Can I tell you
this is the most disgusting thing I ever read? The whole thing is just descriptions of people being
chopped up and how they make the meat. It is too fucking much. So I came out of there like, you know what,
I'm going to be less judgmental because it leads to books like this. And then the full pig came
on the screen. And I was like, I'm going to finish that book. I actually deleted it off my
candle. I was like, I'm going to read it again. I'm going to see if any clowns get made into
hamburgers why don't you just watch sweetie todd and be dumb with it you know it's a much more
palatable version to get to the same end point yeah maybe i will that sounds disgusting but
that's that's that's provocative that's disturbing as fuck it's one of the most disturbing thing i mean
i've never deleted a book off my kindle i saw the bible on there okay and you know how
infuriating that thing is to me but yeah i had to take that off i mean that that was too much but
now i think i'm gonna get it after seeing this full pig okay
Okay, so Kizzy's cleaning, and I don't know why I told you all that.
Sorry, it was disturbing.
And Josh carves up the pig, disturbing.
And Kathy sends down to help, get sent down to help with cabins, et cetera.
And Kizzy's just mad.
She's down there going, fuck off, fuck off, fuck off.
A wasted address.
She really needs to settle down.
I've had enough out of her.
And also, like, the sheets are disgusting.
They're, like, moist and wet.
And Kizzy's like...
And stained with, what is it, Tanner?
Like, what do you think is on there?
Or sweat or tanner.
I don't know what it is.
But, like, and Kesey, like, touches it.
She's like, it's like, it's sweet, I can feel it.
I was like, why are you touching it?
Like, I guess she has to.
She has to pull it off.
And so the other guests are like, they're just having great time.
And everyone is, everyone's just having, they're just having a great dinner.
They're just drunk.
They're being loud and rowdy and just typically annoying.
And now they're going to get in their bathing suits and they're going to get in the hot tub.
And everyone's cleaning, but Kizzy's in her bunk.
because she's checking her phone.
No text messages for Kizzy.
Poor thing.
What does she do?
What does she do when she's not the star?
She just has to sit there.
Yeah.
So then we're in the hot tub.
Okay, so we've got a gross couple in there,
and Imron comes up to them,
and he's like, whoa, I'm going to have a threesome with you guys.
And the guy's like, Jesus Christ.
Yeah, I was going to go in there, but never mind.
So everyone else goes to bed.
And now Imron is still with a couple,
who probably they probably do well they i feel like that bald guy is a swinger for sure don't you he's
like yeah my wife doesn't take her top off for much but for this you might take her top off for real
hell yeah kathy get in here let's fuck kathy and kathy's like no no thank you i'm off duty if you know
a taxi reference i guess you guys don't know uh i'm used to this my mother owned a taxi company
We're like, we know, okay, we know.
I know.
It just relates everything to that.
So, yeah, he's trying to, like, Imran's like,
Cathy, come on.
She's like, no, thank you, please.
She's just so over this.
They're all like, let's get naked together, Kathy.
And the guy's like, we'll take off our trunks
when we see Imran's little butt.
And she's like, Kathy just has the most disgusted look on her face.
Like, Kathy does not have service face where everything's with a smile.
You know, like, oh, it's not nice feet.
you, and then you turn around and you're like, disgusting pigs.
Kathy just looks at you straight to your face like you're a disgusting pig, which I respect.
Yes, because guess what?
They are disgusting pigs.
Yeah.
So then service, you fake it usually, but she doesn't.
She's like, you're disgusting.
She's like, uh-uh, she comes from the Hannah Ferrier tradition of, I will glare at you,
and I'm not going to hide my disgust.
Yeah.
So, V, meanwhile, is FaceTiming her friend, Christy.
And V is like, bitch, I am literally.
literally so happy to hear from you.
I mean, everyone on this crew is just like such a wonderful person.
I hope it's not a trick.
So, like, Chrissy's like, shit, you crush in?
She's like, a little bit.
I'm afraid to let myself feel feelings.
But it actually, it's nine days away from the one-year anniversary of her boyfriend's passing.
So she's getting apprehensive about that.
And then her friend goes, Bonn, isn't that weird?
Doesn't that mean goodbye?
Or does it mean good?
No.
It means good voyage.
Oh, I was thinking because Bon voyage means like, bye, have a good voyage.
But I guess it means good.
Yeah.
I was going to say God, who names her child, bye, you know, prophetic.
But it wasn't.
It was, it was bye.
I mean, it was good.
Listen to what her friend says.
So V is saying, like, yeah, I think, like, I'm going to feel guilty.
It's like one year and, like, I'm going to feel guilty about that.
And Christy goes, hey, he's the one who ruined your birthday.
Whoa.
Jesus.
That's me.
I'm your friend Christy.
And she's like, yeah, fuck that guy.
And they laugh.
She goes, yeah, fuck that guy.
So she's like, yeah, it's nine days until the one-year anniversary of Bond's passing, which
was on my birthday.
And I just, I don't know.
My feelings are so all over the place because Bonn would want me to move on.
But how can I?
When Kathy's mom was a taxi driver when she was, yeah.
That's why I can't move on.
Like, wait a minute.
You're just reusing these now, guys.
Yeah.
The only way I can move on is if I can finally find a taxi.
It's just hard these days.
She's like, I didn't expect to open up to Joe and, like, let him in this quickly.
But now that we're getting more intimate, I feel for my heart that I need to talk to Joe about this.
They're trying to make this fling seem like it's a Jane Austen novel.
And it's not.
It's just two horny people on a boat together.
And like, I swear to God, if I have to hear Joe say one more time, like, I've never felt something like this before.
This is new for me.
I'm like, I don't really, do you want an award?
Do you get an award for liking someone?
You don't.
Yeah, it gets a gold medal.
Yeah, it gets a gold medal for not cheating on somebody that he's been dating for two days.
Yeah.
It's like, I'm, yes.
I've never done this before.
I've never done this.
I've never been like this before.
Oh, grandpappy.
So now we go back up to the deck and Kathy is still supervising these idiots in the hot tub.
And Imron's like, hey, Kathy, can I pee off the boat?
I do it on my own yacht.
Yeah, she's like, you have an absolutely gorgeous bathroom in your cabin to use.
He's like, no, it's three floors down.
I'll check a thing on my wiener for you, Kathy.
Yeah, you can see a rich person's wiener.
Yeah.
See, I don't want to see your penis because, you know, my mother did have a taxi company growing up.
So, you know, you understand.
He's like, actually, I don't know what you're getting at.
Well, you wouldn't understand if you don't have taxi in your blood.
It's like I'll just stand here
My penis will go
I won't drip Kathy
Come on let me piss up the thing
And she's like
Listen
I have a very checkered past
All right
My friends and family
Are always super jealous
That I get to travel the world
On these luxury yachts
And look what I deal with
Wrinkly penis Imron
dangling its ding ding
off the side of a boat
To make a little pee pee
Do you know how difficult it is for me
My friends are so jealous
They say oh you get to travel the world
but you can't just travel when in your mind
you're just thinking about how big the fare is going to be
all day long I just think
$5, $6, $7, $8, it's torture, I tell you, torture.
He's like, well, can't it's the captain's going to kick me up?
She's like, well, I don't think she would appreciate it.
So she's like, this is what you call Instagram versus reality.
We see reality, Imran, and then we see the Instagram,
and it's that lady from Real House.
so I said Potomac, Angel.
It's looking 20.
So, Kathy's like, all right.
Instagram was the name of my mother's taxi company.
You say, do you need grandma in an instant?
And then she'd show up in a yellow cab.
So he's like, yeah, there's too many rules.
I'm going to pee downstairs.
Because that would make me so happy.
Thank you so much.
So, by the way, if you pee off the side of your,
own yacht then why aren't you on your own yacht that's what i've got to ask exactly that's the thing then
why are you why are you on some discount tv yacht yeah there's a tv yacht we all know this is like not
true five-star yachting right you know it's gonna be shitty remember when there was that horrible lady who
got kicked off the boat that time and she was like yeah i got a yacht i got my own yacht that's right
i'm a boat person motherfuckers and then we found out she was just one of those people who
lived on like a little tugboat or something
So was that Dolores?
That was Dolores.
Delores, yeah.
She was not that...
Democrats, lady.
So, Imran and Michael are wandering around the boat,
and they're in their robes.
They're drunk.
They're, like, knocking on their friend's door
and everything.
And Kathy's sort of, like, monitoring.
And now they're in their hallway,
the guest hallway.
And then Michael just drops his glass
because he's drunk
and it shatters on the floor
and they're all barefoot.
And Kathy is like,
you've got to be fucking kidding me.
So she kind of just tells them both
like, okay, time for you to go into your rooms.
And Joe starts to clean up.
And I like when Kathy looks at Joe,
and she goes, I'm a raccoon.
I look cute.
But if it comes out again, I do bite.
And I like how she talked to them because she was like, all right, all right.
Both of you go to your rooms.
You go to that room.
Do you go to that room?
Have a nice sleep.
I'll see you tomorrow.
It's like, yes, Kathy.
Yeah.
I love that.
Kathy's great.
I think I feel like Kathy will could be on the track to be a below deck franchise first
do like I think that she could be she could kind of graduate to that level because she seems
like she's really good at her job a chief student and she like a chiefs too sorry yeah chiefs too
and like she's good at her job she has just enough like um uh sort of judginess in her eyes
to sort of like really do the role and that's that's it there's no third thing she's just
She's good.
I'm going to need some more one-liners.
Yeah, but I thought the record thing was sort of, I enjoyed the, yeah, I get it, but I think she's on the track.
She's on the track.
I need more scathingly, I need more scathing one-liners in the diary room, I think.
So we, now it's, but, you know, hey, she's just starting.
You know what?
Give her a chance.
Give her a chance, I say.
So it's the next morning at 6.30.
My Lisp is getting worse lately.
What do you think that is?
Is my tongue getting bigger?
Am I getting?
gay. Is that a thing that happens?
What is that?
You might need an invisaline.
Maybe your teeth are sort of like moving.
Your teeth may be moving slightly out of position and you may need
invisible line to sort of get them.
Is that what it is?
My teeth are moving.
So my lisp is worse.
Yeah, because your teeth are in a different position.
God.
Your tongue is not hitting where it needs to be.
I thought I was as gay as they come.
By the labial fricatives are not coming out as well as they should.
Like if I was in heaven and I was putting together a menu of who I wanted to be and I was
like, I want to be the gayest I can.
possibly be i would be i'm that gay like how can i be any gayer and then i get more of a lisp and now
i have a whistle lisp where i like some of the words i whistle with my tongue i go i can't even do it
now but you'll hear it i mean what the hell man leave me alone that oh i could do that that would be very
gay that's true well maybe i could be gay thanks ben you could
Okay, so now it's the morning, and Kizzy is talking to Josh and telling him she hears voices.
I hear voices too.
They're yours, and they're fucking annoying.
Yeah.
And she's setting the table and everything, and Nathan is like, oh, that's a good sight.
You're bent over at the table.
She's like, oh, shut up, Nathan.
And now V is getting the jet ski on the.
the hook and everything. Everyone's getting ready. And Captain Sandy is like, oh my God, I love
Sweepsweek. Wind is out of control. God, there's so much wind this week. Oh, guest star.
Wind with the guest star of gusts. Oh, I love a crossover.
22 knots landing. God, I love this show. Good crossover. Ever since Taylor Sheridan took over,
wind has been so good. Wind now has giant trucks in it. Everybody, every piece of wind.
And it's a gigantic truck.
Oh, once they got Billy Bob Thorne in wind, oh, it's really been very compelling.
So now Nathan is telling Max, no fucking around today.
Just do your job all right.
And he's like, okay.
So then Captain Sandy calls Nathan to the bow.
We're going to start hauling the anchor.
So Aisha is reading Kathy's notes from the night.
night before. She's got like 10 sticky notes out. And one of hers is like, went to bed at 3 a.m.
After chasing Mike and Imran around the boat, cleaning shattered glass. Might sleep an extra hour,
feeling rough. Don't question me. Kathy. Now, wait a second. There's three more notes here. The first
note says chocolate. The second one says chocolate. And the third one says chocolate. What does that
mean? Ak.
I'm leaving these on sticky notes.
Unfortunately, I can't find a sticky man.
Am I right?
Ack.
So everyone's cleaning and everything, and Aisha tells Kizu to set the table.
And she's like, by the way, Kizzi, you look absolutely wonderful for a troll-up.
Look, look, I love you so much.
You're doing such a great job.
You're the star of the instant.
side area where no one can see you.
She starts, like, humping her.
She's like, yeah, you're doing so good.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
And then Nathan goes to see Captain Sandy.
And she's like, hey, when we dock, we're going to have wind.
Ding, ding, ding.
So it's important that you're precise, okay?
Because yesterday was a tough day for you guys.
All right, I need you to be more of a boss.
Be a boss.
Bring that professionalism for me.
Here's my finger in your face.
You see it?
I see it.
It's right up my nose.
All right.
Be a boss.
Be a boss.
Listen, listen.
If they're going to cast Joan Allen on wind,
then you have to be a boss
because everyone's upping their game around here, okay?
So now Joe and V, more flirting.
They're like, oh my God, I've never met anybody like you.
I've never met anybody like...
Yeah, I'm like so crazy.
I'm like my boyfriend died.
Yeah, well, how do you feel about it?
I hope that you're fun with me sticking your...
My win or in your feelings.
Oh, yeah, I'm ready for it.
Yeah, don't be afraid of my feelings.
I'm totally ready for it.
I've never felt like this ever before
So Aisha is now talking to Mike
And she's like, oh, I heard you
But not last night
And then the lady is like
Yeah, his nickname is crazy Mike for a reason
He has mental illness, unfortunately
So we're just trying to
We're just trying to make him comfortable
His nickname was crazy Mike.
Wow, what a fascinating person
You know if your name
If your nickname is something that
basic. You are just a boring ass human being. Crazy Mike. Or you sell electronics. Yeah.
Like what he sells stereos down in like 8th Avenue. Crazy Mike. Crazy Mike. We do your oil
changes for $5 off every Wednesday. We are crazy. Max brings some stuff to Kathy's cab and he's like,
oh, bizu, bizu, bizu, bizu. And she's like, no, thank you. He's like, oh, when I'm a very, I'm
when I'm serious with a girl
they become family to me
because when I was younger
my mother cheat on my father
and after my father cheated my mother
and then my father cheated my mother and then my father
kicked me out of my house
and so I did feel like a little bit of a bad amount
and like all the love
I had to have parents and I put them in a relationship
and like did down my subconscious
like I just want a great new family
because I have all this love
and I never had a love before
that's very nice Max
but did either of your cheating parents own
a taxi company? Don't think so
sorry
not as compelling as
me um yeah his whole thing is sad you know like his parents cheated on each other they hated each
other so they divorced and i guess he got dumped by both of them like it's one of those things where
the parents don't really fight for the kid they're just like you take him no you take him no you
take him i guess is what happened which is sad you know and that's it is sad but he's like you know
since i don't have love from my parents i take it all out in my relationship so deep down on my
subconscious i like to create a family it's not your subconscious like you're you're doing it you know
you're doing it yeah you know sounds sounds healthy what could go wrong um i'm just mad as parents
are like uh do you want idiot's son he just put uh touched he just tried to pet a jellyfish again
like no why would i want our jellyfish petting son you take him no but you're the one who talked
about jellyfish yeah but you're the one who all want to pet things no i did not okay neither
of us take him leave him in the park it's friends it'll be whimsical
Truly. I mean, because you watch this show and, you know, you hear a story like this and it's really heartbreaking because he seems like a sweet guy, but then you're like, well, I've watched Max on two seasons now. What are you leaving out of this story? Because part of me is one, did you set the house on fire because you left a stove on? Did you let, you know, some stranger borrow your mom's car and just drive it out into the middle of nowhere? What did you do? He was probably bouncing off those walls, nonstop. He was probably a very, very,
very active child.
I mean,
it also,
like,
his behavior kind of makes sense
when he tells that story
because he does sort of seem
like he's kind of paused
in like a 14-year-old
adolescence, you know,
a 13- or 14-year-old
sort of state of mind.
And he's like,
he does,
like, require a lot of attention.
You want so much.
And it probably does come from the fact
that his parents have basically
scuttled him to the side,
which is sad.
But also,
yeah,
he's a lot.
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
I'm too parent.
We're like,
this is so sad,
but also I get it.
Okay, so Max brings up kissing her and, she's like, sandwich.
You know, he's so nice.
I totally get why his parents abandoned him, but you know what?
Look at his work ethic.
Yeah.
Complemental teen.
Exactly.
That's a backhanded sandwich.
It was like an open-handed sandwich.
No, no, it is actually true.
It's sad.
But I get it.
But not compare it.
Unless you have a taxi involved, I'm sorry.
Seriously. I know. If you want me to feel for things, get a taxi cab in your family.
Like, I'm sorry, we have a defrauded realtor pass. We have clown commune pass and we have
taxi cap confessions pass. So like parental trauma, that's just like so run on the middle. That's like
the crazy mic of backstories. Sorry. I don't know. I just feel like if you have somebody
that knows their parents don't like them, then you have somebody that's actually been paying
attention because I think a lot of us just don't really pay attention to what our parents are
really thinking. Thankfully, my mom will just say it out loud. There's no wondering on my end.
She likes me some of the time and some of the time she's like, no. So there's no wondering,
you know? Well, anyway, point is not about me. Max is trying to kiss this girl again. He's
all over. He's way too much. He is way too much. And the thing I think that's bothering me is
that he's way too much and he knows he's too much, but then he excuses being too much by being too
much and being like oh my god am i too much i'm too much i know i'm too much come here
give me kids you take off your clothes i take off my clothes i love you so much would you like to get
married you want to get married oh i'm too much i'm too much it's because of my mommy me me me
get your hands off me sir i'm trying to get ready for work yeah i think like putting all this
energy onto a british stew who likes to scowl it's just it may not work out it may not work out
I don't think it's like a fly trying today to fly swatter.
You know, it's just not going to work out.
You just know what's coming, and I'm rooting for the swatter.
I'm always rooting for the swatter.
He doesn't root for the swatter.
Let's be honest.
So now it's time for breakfast.
The deck team is getting ready for talking.
Nathan's putting on fenders.
Captain Sandy comes up behind him, and she's like, Nathan,
hi, it's me.
You're boss yet?
Okay, still not a boss.
All right, put them low because if I'm next to that,
Say, well, crunch.
Crunchy, crunchy, aren't?
Yeah, okay.
Because remember last time, how when you asked him, put out the fenders?
And I said, what are we?
I walk in garbage barge.
And by walking, I mean sailing.
Oh, God.
Because we walk on water a little bit.
It's a religious experience.
And then this time, I'm like, no, get him out.
Get him out right now.
He's like, okay, that's what I'll do.
So then they're in the, we're in the galley.
And it's just talking to Kathy and Josh is there.
And she's like, how bad were they last night?
They were bad, almost as bad as Max, but somehow more charming.
I don't know.
I'm tired.
One of the guests asked Mike, so you guys were really in the hot tub naked?
He's like, yeah, we both were.
Crazy Mike.
So now Kizzy is pulling off a sheet that's covered with the tanner or the brown stuff,
whatever.
And Kathy's just kind of watching her because he's about to barf.
And Kathy's just like, you can do it.
I believe in you.
I won't help you.
But I'm sure you can do this.
All right, lads.
We're going to be docking.
That's going to be a challenge, a boss challenge.
That's what I've been told.
It's extremely windy.
Oh, my God, it's on TV again.
I thought it wasn't on until tomorrow night.
Oh, geez, I'm running back to the TV.
I'll be right there.
Oh, my God.
Is that David Struth, Aaron?
Wow.
All star casting for Streep's Week.
Wow.
Wow.
We're going to have the same setup in the stern.
Me and Joe and Vee.
And once he's done, he'll come up and let's focus.
and bring it back get the focus in get the game faces on be of forget bass be a boss but not them
can't have multiple bosses what are you trying to give your job away all right be an employee
oh that wasn't very inspiring nathan all right i've got to come to anything right on the
yeah consultant be a be a be someone be someone who's uh on a on a on a on a
a brief contract.
Good enough.
So back at breakfast,
and mom's like,
oh, Kathy's going to be
a great mother,
Aisha,
the way she yelled at us
last night.
Yes, God,
I'll just whip my dick out
right there,
started peeing.
She's like,
I'm so pleased.
And then Kizzy is
cleaning or whatever,
and Kathy's like,
so are you in a good mood?
Do we have to pander
to your little tantrum
for being indoors
while I'm up there
getting a penis
whipped out in my face.
Oh, I don't know.
I don't know.
Oh, I'm sad.
Kathy's like so over this.
There's like this fucking twit down here.
And now it's time for the talking.
The wind meter is showing on screen and it's 12 knots.
Guys, 12 not.
Uh-oh.
It's 17 knots.
It is 17.
Well, according to Sandy, the screen says 12 knots.
And Sandy's like, it's 17 knots.
17 knots, guys.
27 knots.
Oh, my God.
And they just cast Maria.
L-O-2. Wow, it's just an all-starcast. Wind is out of control this week.
And everyone outside's like, oh my God, it's so windy. It's so windy. God, the wind is blowing, isn't it? It's 22 knots. It's 22 knots. The knots are notting. The knots or notting. Oh, no, the bow thrusters went out. I got no bow thrusters. Oh, my God. If I take a bow, more like, where's the bow? I can't do it. What's happening? We're going to crash. We're going to crash in the sailboat or the fender's out. God, I don't care if we look like a garbage vessel. Just get the venters out. God, I don't care if we look like a garbage vessel. Just get the vent.
out and save the sailboat.
Oh, geez, it's not working.
This darn boat's not working.
And I like that Captain Sandy, Captain Sandy fixes things the way I do.
She's like, oh, my God, the button's not working.
Press it.
The button's not working.
Press it.
The button's not working.
Press it.
The button's not working.
That's exactly how I fix things.
And, you know, shockingly, it somehow works sometimes.
Sometimes.
Well, like my parking, I'm playing chicken with my garage door open at the moment.
because it needs a new battery
and it's at that point
we have to hit it like 10 times
before it finally like connects
okay I will send a signal
but I'm like I refuse to bring it
inside to replace the battery
even though I have the battery
the little circle battery that goes in it
and I'm like no no I'm not bringing it inside
I'm getting every last ounce of juice
in this garage store but you know the moment
that like I lose that game chicken
I'm gonna be like the garage door is not opening
this is so annoying I have to park the car on the street
and I have to come inside and come back out
it'll be actually 10 times worse
but I, like, I refuse to do it.
But that's kind of the same thing.
Just pressing the button, pressing the button.
It would have been nice to get some warning.
And then she's like, Ben, Ben, get over here.
Because I guess the first mate's name is Ben.
I was like, okay, I'll be right there.
I'm so obedient.
I'm, like, walking through the TV.
I'm like, I'll help you, Captain Sandy.
Yeah.
And so the real cast comes into help, which I like.
I like when the real, the real cast has had to come out a few times recently.
We've seen them.
And we know because they don't work out.
Like, you know, like,
a real boat worker because they don't have any muscle tone they're just like wow they've always
got a sandwich in one hand like what's not working the button hits the button they always look like
they should be like you know talking shit outside of a deli somewhere so she's like it's not
working the bow the bow they're like playing bites outside of a deli i gotta go out that sandy again
it's like the sopranos it's like when they hang out outside that meat shop you know like okay
guess we got to go fix the battle thruster, huh?
Yeah.
So we come back, still no thruster, and so someone comes to help her, and then the phone,
the guests don't know.
They're on their phones.
They're like, whatever.
It's amazing.
Like, I can't even park into like a regular parking space, and she's parking into this.
And meanwhile, Captain Sandy's like, where can he hit that sailboat?
Oh, good.
So ultimately, I think what happens is that they have to throw the ropes to the dock, to the
workers on the dock in a specific way, and basically they just get pulled in.
They just get towed in to the spot.
They get towed in.
They have to do it at kind of an angle.
Like they throw the, instead of the center pole, they have to do it to one over the left or whatever.
So it pulls them a little bit differently.
Captain's like, wow.
The deck needs to pull those lines in a certain place.
And we need to use the windlasses to pull the boat over.
Okay.
Wow.
One little wrong move could end our charter season.
Millis seconds matter.
So hold on.
I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do.
The button's broken.
The button's broken.
The button's broken.
Hold on one second.
It looks like we're about to crash in that sale button.
Our season's about to be, it's about to end.
So near, far, wherever you are.
I sorry, I always sing that right before we sink.
Oh, oh, we docked.
Oh, great.
Great.
That's wonderful.
Okay, so everything's okay.
All right.
Take a rest, Celine Dion.
Okay?
You live another day.
Congratulations.
You've reached the end of part one of a two.
Two-part recap. For part two,
go look for the recap that says
Part two. See you over there, suckers.
Watch what crappins would like to thank
its premium sponsors.
Ain't no thing like Allison King.
It's always a party on Allison Block.
Our way is the Amber Way.
It's the Foster and the Furious. It's Amanda Foster.
It's always automatic with Ashley Otto.
Put your hands together for Carly Clap.
Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt.
We never miss her call. It's Diane Call.
Big yay, it's Emily Gautier.
Erin McNicholas, she don't miss no trickles.
Hava Nigelow.
You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones.
I go, you go, we all go for Hugo.
Jamie, she has no less namey.
She's our kind of mess.
It's Jennifer Messer.
Sips some scotch with Jessica Trotch.
She's our favorite streamer, Caroline Peacock.
Kristen the Pistin Anderson.
Get a bee in your bonnet with Lacey Bee.
K. Surrah, Sarah, whatever will be will Lauren Sillsby.
She gets a name from us. It's Lindsay D. Let's give a kisserino to Lisa Lino.
Fresh as a daisy, it's Maisie McKinery. We love her on the rocks. It's Melissa Cox.
Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the burg.
This is Living with Michelle Vivian.
I love a ya, Olivia Williamson. She sure is swell. It's Raquel.
Yes, we can, uh, it's Sedana.
Cast a Spell with Shannon Spellman. Let's share with Sharon Eldridge.
Darn Skippy, it's Tippy.
And our super premium sponsors.
Make way for A.J. Lopez.
She's VV.I.P. It's Amanda V.
Can't lose when you're with Amy Baldwin.
Somebody get us 10 cc's of Betsy MD.
We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva.
Let's get real with Caitlin O'Neill.
Put us on a stretcher. It's Charlotte Fletcher.
Don't get salty with Christine Pepper.
Can't have a meal without the Emily sides.
Who, what, why, where, and Gwen Pentland.
Let's go into the woods with Guy Tubbs
Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall
Hale the corkmaster the master of the cork
Jennifer Corcoran
We got our wish, it's Jen Plish
She's not harsh, she's Jill Hirsch
My favorite Murdo
Karen McMurdo
She's a total knockout
It's Katie Mannock
We love him madly
It's Kyle Pod Chadley
In the study with a candlestick
It's Leslie Peacock
Gee, it's Lisa H
We're ride or die for Lisa Rider Baron
She's a whiz, it's Liz Sarthie.
Always killing it, it's Low Alcalani.
The Incredible Edible Matthews Sisters.
She eases our woes, it's Melissa St. Rose.
There's a chance of meatballs, it's Rebecca Cloud.
Maximum love for Sandy Maximuska.
She's the Queen Bee, it's Sarah Lemke.
We cannot tell a lie, it's Sarah Teleth Sun.
Shannon, out of a canon, Anthony.
Please don't stop at Solian Pop.
Let's take off with Tamla Plain.
We're obsessed doll with Tessa V.
You'll always get the full story with Tori, Parsons.
She ain't no shrinking Violet Coutar.
We love you guys.
If you like Watch What Crapins, you can listen ad-free right now
by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts.
Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.
Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey.
