Watch What Crappens - #3126 RHOBH S15E03: All the Single Ladies
Episode Date: December 19, 2025Its speed dating week on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Douchebags abound. Then it’s off to a money talk lunch where Dorit festers on her marriage and realizes how unprepared she is ...for PK’s games. To watch this recap on video, listen to our bonus episodes, and participate in live episode threads, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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What's what happens when there's so much than crap is.
Hello and welcome to watch what crapans.
I'm Ronnie and that's Ben over there.
Hello, Benooney tunes.
How are you doing today, buddy?
Hello, hello, hello.
I'm doing great.
I am manifesting what sort of provider I want to be.
So I think I'm kind of set for life.
I've done the hard work of manifesting.
How are you doing?
Man of, you're putting the man and manifest, Tiger.
I'm doing good.
I love that Amanda Francis is already so,
so incredibly full of shit it's just it's just a gift to us as an audience you know because now
i think we're going to we're going to finally enter a season where to read is not the most full
of shit which is going to be interesting because tree's pretty yeah yeah to read's full of shit
they're all a lot of that they're pretty much all full of shit and i'm also enjoying the bows
versus amanda burgeoning issue there of like um seminar to seminar seminar seminar seminar seminar seminar on seminar
I would say, I was like, wait a second, you know, like I do seminars, but you do seminars,
but your seminars are full of shit.
My seminars are the good shit.
So it's like, um, this will be fun to watch.
Seminar queen.
We shouldn't actually look into Bose's seminars, like we did Amanda's website last week.
Maybe we'll do that later in the recap today because I'm curious what those are because I thought
that was a little weird that Bose got so instantly turned off by Amanda's like stick.
and then I didn't even think.
Like she's got competing seminars.
Oh, let's see what they are.
Bow's seminars.
Anyway, while I Google that, everybody,
welcome to the show.
Monday is our final crap.
Not crappy hour.
We already did that.
Monday is our final Amazon live for the year.
And that's going to be a 4 p.m.
It's going to be a good old time.
We just chat with you.
You chat with us.
You ask us questions if you want to.
We talk about stuff.
We shop together.
So 4 p.m.
Pacific time Monday.
So join us.
You can find our link in bio on Instagram.
Also, if you want these videos on recap, you get them on Patreon.
That's also where you get all our bonus episodes.
We've got a really fun two-parter coming up Friday and Monday for The Traders.
We do a cast breakdown and do two episodes on it.
So that's super fun.
If you want to talk trash about that cast, join us over there.
But today, today, today, we are joining.
The Badass Workshop, curated by Bose.
Well, here you've come to the right place, because we've got your next move right here.
Every session of the Badass Workshop is now available for you to watch.
So take your first step towards building your baddest self and sign up today.
I mean, this sounds pretty full of shit too, right?
The Badass Workshop.
We'll access to tent sessions.
Don't forget to check out Bose's special urgent life super session.
She breaks out her memoir lessons.
I love it.
It's like, everyone, there's an urgent session
that needs to be had.
That's just kind of like the other sessions, probably.
I mean, I think that what Bose has going for her
is that she does have, like,
she does have real credits in the world of corporate America.
I mean, and Amanda has sold, you know, books and everything.
But, yeah, I kind of feel like this is a battle royale
between the seminar queens.
and, you know, I think with these seminars, just in general, I have to say, and I'm a skeptic
because I'm also never taken them, but I'm a skeptic, and I feel like all these seminars,
all these self-help gurus on a certain level, they may be helpful, but I do feel like there
is a good amount of bullshit that comes with it, too, you know?
Oh, yeah, of course, yeah, yeah.
So you may get value from it, but I feel like the business model is to get people to keep coming
back so you have to feed a certain amount of bullshit so i just don't trust any of them and they know
that which is why like there there's only enough room for enough workshops like i feel like you kind of
need to like to do the workshops my outsider view is you sort of have to like create like a cult
i'm not saying that they are a cult so you just have to create a cult like following and that means
you have to have blinders on to everything else which is why now like bows and amanda they would
but heads potentially over their seminars because they would be they're literally direct competitors.
Well, and when you look at their websites, they really are because Amanda, as we saw last week,
it was, you know, every workshop is her in a different badass dress and, you know, looking glamorous.
They're all glamour shots and like holding purse and pretty purses and big letters saying what's
this chapter is about. But in Amanda's case, they're big like girly cursive.
They're like, part two manifesting your money, bench.
And then in Bose is, Bose does not use cursive.
She uses extreme bold, like extreme bold.
But hers are the same.
It's all pictures of her and, you know, looking beautiful.
There's like, chapter one, bring the badass looking gorgeous.
Chapter two, looking gorgeous, but on a floaty lips.
Boardroom batty.
Chapter three, in a suit in front of a bunch of flowers.
Get that money, honey.
Chapter four, spirit, mind, body, and wellness.
And you can tell because I'm wearing something.
athletic, but also hot.
And five, I'm in a wedding dress in an ocean.
Live life urgently.
I could drown right now on a wedding dress.
Who wants that?
So they're similar.
There's similar vibes.
So, yeah, I'm glad you pointed that out.
Because I forgot that Bose even had workshops.
Yeah, they haven't highlighted that at all.
But when we first met Bose, I always have this image of her walking to her seminar.
And she had her whole team.
She was, like, walking behind her.
They were like a second line.
And they were just sort of like doing this, like,
March to the seminar together and it was so funny to me that like that shot was like it's like
seared in my brain but what's interesting is I'm looking at Bose's website and her workshops
like her level two workshop her her level one is $50 then I'm sorry super session is $50 the
urgent life level one is 100 that's five sessions level two is 150 five sessions and then level
three is 250 for 10 sessions or so and I'm trying to find prices on Amanda's website and
I'm not seeing a lot of prices.
The only thing I did find is on the bundle page
that you can get a bundle of videos
and if you were to buy each video separately,
it says it would cost $2,700,
which makes me feel like
Amanda may be overcharging.
For whatever it is, if you're by all her videos,
you'd spend $2,700, whereas Bose is like,
a class is $150 for five classes.
Where are you seeing the prices?
Because when I press sign up, it's trying to get my info, and I'm not giving it to them.
On Amanda?
No, on Bose.
Oh, on Bose, it just says the badass workshop.com.
You just scroll down.
It just says the badass workshop, $150, all five sessions.
It's just straight up right there.
Oh, I'm on a page that says a badass workshop.com, but it doesn't say prices.
But anyway, oh, yeah, there it is.
Oh, my gosh.
I scroll down to the glamour shots.
I mean, yeah, it's so high up that I didn't even.
even look for it. I was expecting it to be at the bottom. Yeah, this is definitely cheaper than
Amanda's. Because Amanda is like, this is worth $19,000. And I'm like, oh, geez. So now she's
going to act like $18,000 as a bargain or something, you know? Well, I think also the fact that
she doesn't really publish her prices anywhere easy to find is a huge red flag. Like, yeah,
that's actually like, booze is just like, my, this is how much cost? Sign up. But Amanda does not
have prices anywhere trying to find them or they're not easily accessible i mean i'm i'm scrolling
through and that's just that's she needs to manifest some some prices on here okay because she has a lot
of information but i'm not seeing anything okay let's see i'll click on uh sell from your soul okay
you click on this as her sitting Amanda and some sort of like roughly roughly shouldered
top with like a leather skirt is the sacred art of calling in sharing with and selling to those who need
your work. And it's like a lot of texts. Here's the thing. Why you need it. I mastered this.
Blah, blah, blah. Hi there. I'm Amanda Francis. I don't feel like a salesperson. Blah, blah, blah, blah.
It goes on and on and on. This is the platform. Blah, blah, blah, blah for your tactics, force her funnels.
And you scroll down and down. You're like, okay, where's the good stuff? How much does it cost to take this
class? Scrolling, scrolling, scrolling, module one. Oh, oh, here we go. Finally, the training.
Okay, uh, pre-worked. The soul, the soulful art of sacred selling value, 490.
it's a 10 parts.
See, she's telling you the value,
but she's not telling you how much it is.
Yeah, that's what I feel last.
3.97.
397.
This is more expensive.
I'm saying it right now.
Yeah.
So, listen, if you want to get hustled with positivity,
go to Bose.
So I'll see you for cheaper.
I also feel like there's something about, like,
how wordy Amanda's website is
that makes it feel like more of a con job.
It's like you're working.
extra hard to convince me which has me with my red flags up um well yeah that's kind of the nature
of these you know they they have but you know bozes like i said is in bold and not like cursive
and they're paragraphs instead of like entire pages so yeah i don't know um so let's get to it
shall we here we go uh 1503 a match made in beverly hit is heaven and it's beverly hill so we
start with Dior, tiny dongs, lots of Clazell-Zool bottles.
I collect them.
I love them.
Got 20 of them.
Sorry, I was just trying to do the violins in the background to set the stage, you know?
Get the tone just right for us.
Bose is with Nico, her assistant, who's pulling a Lala today with his over-the-shoulder,
but arms not in his jacket look, Luke.
And she's like, oh, I feel like the hostess of the Bachelorette today.
And he's like, and then what are the men called on that, like the Bachelors?
She's like, yeah, yes.
Yes.
He says it like, oh, my God, are they so stupid that they call him The Bachelors?
It's like, yeah, Nico, that's what they're called.
Poor sweet Nico.
He's so sweet and so lovely.
And sometimes he says some very dumb things, and it's hilarious.
You just want to hold him in your arms, just cuddle him a little bit.
Just rock him in your arms.
I want to put his jacket on right is what I want to do before his wrist catch colds.
So he's like, I've never seen that show.
It's where the old people date, right?
She's like, um, no.
So I've come to a striking revelation.
Almost everyone is single in this group, and these girls are going through it.
So Bose is like, uh, she's going to match make.
Yeah.
And she's like, oh, the REIT's going to be the most enthusiastic of all the girls.
And he's like, no, maybe Erica.
Oh, Erica's going to scare them.
And secretly, Kyle's going to be nervous.
It's not going to be secret.
Kyle's going to be performatively nervous.
nervous. And she's like, oh, Kyle, finally, she can let her hair down. Hopefully she can do
the splits or something. Something new. Yes, hopefully she can feel so relaxed she can do a split.
You know, I went through my contacts list and found eligible bachelors that meet my friend's needs.
I also learned that I don't have a lot of friends who are single. It's really the best I could
come up with. It's kind of sad. I went through my contacts and realized, God, I know a lot of aging
douchebags. So, it's time to have a party. So we see the guys.
they're all outside like hey yeah hi what do you do what are you do what are you using your
hair everything how about you literally every stem cells are you stem cells in my hair that's
why yeah bro yeah and we see a flashback um where Bose has called the girls together and she has a
white board and she's like all right everyone give me adjectives for men that you like rich okay
wealthy okay lots of money oh okay and what about personality wise
I want old as fuck, almost dead, really pasty, balls down to his ankles.
Can you find that for me? Thanks.
I want someone who can, like, feed Caius.
Caius means like a lot to me, like Caius, like Caius.
I just want someone who won't hurt my ex-husband's feelings or my, or my daughters.
I'm an actor.
I want someone who is okay with fixing vending machines.
He'll have to do that before he enters my house.
So she goes out and she meets the guys, and she's like, oh, let me tell you a secret, guys.
These ladies are nervous.
The group chat is filled with, what do I say?
What do I do?
You should see the group chat.
It's crazy.
And we see the group chat, and something's like, I can wear a cat sweater.
Here's a cat, Jif.
They're saying, what do I do?
Because what they're trying to ask is, how do I seem friendly, even though I have no interest in these people?
Like, what, what are the things I should say so I don't look like a total bitch on camera, even though I already know I don't want to date any of these men. None of them are famous enough.
So then we go to Erica getting glam and she's like, I just want to look like a normal human being. Try and do that today. I know it's nothing I've ever asked for that I want to look normal because men get scared of me to face, keep it young, but approachable, but not approachable. I want to look like I could give you a blowjob in the back alley, but I might, not, not, not.
Okay, my mind, my mind.
Okay, Glamteam, make me look pretty.
That's all I want.
Like, okay, I'm going to make you look snatched.
Well, I don't want to seem like I'm something that belongs in Doreet's house, you know?
No, that's not what snatched means anymore.
Well, watch your mouth.
What, you better watch your mouth in here.
Okay, I've already gotten a letter from the Catholic church this week.
I need a, I need a Coca-Cola.
I'm going to struggle.
And we see Doreet, she's having a moment where she's just, like, putting on rings.
And it's like,
Like what?
Well, we're seeing what Doreet does when she can't afford glam.
She's like, oh, I'm going to put a ring on a different finger, I guess I'll just talk to
myself.
If I put too many rings on here, then no one can claim me, right?
Because then we can't put a ring on it, like by aunt says, says, right?
Oh, I'm so done with the popular music.
So we go to Bose's and everybody starts showing up.
And when Kyle and Erica come, the music's like,
bha-p-p-p-t-d-d-d-d-d-ch.
She's like, well, I don't know about Kyle's single state.
Is she single because she's accepted her separation from,
oh, has she really even singled at all?
Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm.
The mystery.
Hey, uh, sorry to interrupt your inner monologue,
but I do have to ask a question.
Why'd you bring the most expensive bag, Kyle?
And Kyle's like, oh my God, it's me.
I got like a mini-cally.
Huh.
Shows up, shows her Airman's bag,
$36,000.
Yanks.
Well, you're signaling high maintenance and stay away from me.
Speaking of, here's Doreen.
Doreen's like, oh, booze, you're a goddess.
Look at you.
I've never seen anyone so gorgeous.
Goose.
Have you seen booze?
Gorgeous.
By the way, just circling back to Kyle's little message that she's going to bring her most expensive
Armas bag so that way the guys know what they have to live up to or what they have to provide for her,
I guarantee that message is going to be totally lost on them.
I guarantee, especially the comedian.
The comedian is just going to be like, hey, cool bag.
Do you get that at Marshalls?
Yeah, they're guys.
So, I was like, oh, my God, we're all wearing black.
Why don't we all look like we're going to a funeral?
Because for most of them, for everyone who's watching this show,
they've just watched the future 25 minutes die in front of their eyes.
Like, oh, my God.
Wow.
We're watching this for about 25 minutes of airtime.
We're mourning our Thursday nights.
So Rachel's like, well, the key is you have to try too hard.
Because like if you look desperate and thirsty, like, even look, if you wear black on the first date, you're saying I want to have sex with you.
So I wore black.
Yeah.
Because I want to look like I didn't think about that because I like didn't care.
Because like I wasn't thinking.
I was like, I die.
Like I was like, oh my God, I'm going to wear black because I'm like not even paying attention to the fact that I'm like going on a date, not even realizing that I'm like,
like dressing slutty and black.
I heard about this party and then I died.
So I dressed for my own funeral.
But I came back to life to come here.
But like I'm dead being here.
I'm like literally flatlined.
Because like when I'm at home, I have to wear black.
Because like when Cass eats, he spits all like all over my shirt.
This way it hides the stains.
It's like I wasn't even thinking like getting.
Yeah.
It's time for a commercial.
It's time for a crappence commercial.
So Erica's like.
I look like a maid that's about to get bent over and fucked.
She does kind of, she's wearing this, like, black dress
with kind of a white under thing that hangs out in the bottom,
like a flip is showing.
Yeah.
Yes.
It's very clear.
French maid.
Mm-hmm.
Everyone comes in black.
And she's like, well, we looked like we just came from a witch convention, which, by the way,
I mean, that's a very glamorous witch convention.
Now, there's an episode.
Where else about?
Yeah, real witches, the real witches of Eastwick.
So, Erica's like, it says that we're in our lives, okay?
Black clouds are gonna over all of us.
Yes, we just have to know that big, what, we, we just, we have to just know going in that they're all cute, they're all successful, and they're all very, very nice.
So who's going to be afraid to talk to them next?
Who's first?
Kyle, are you going to run into a closet?
No.
Just don't go in that.
Oh, no, it's buzz.
She goes, don't go in asking for dickpicks.
And Erica's like, how dare you?
How dare you?
And Kyle's like, I get enough dick picks to my DMs.
Like, what's a dick pick supposed to make me do?
Be like, um, hi, want to meet up?
Yeah.
I mean, I think actually, yes.
I think that's the intent.
Dickpicks are really weird, though.
Just like random in people's DMs, they are kind of weird.
It's weird to just send one without context.
It's like one thing if like you're like already sexing and then one comes up, but like just to start with that is such a bold move.
Yeah.
Um, so Rachel's like, I'm going to go out there wearing my sunglasses.
Like did anybody else die when I said that?
Like literally like that's crazy.
Like just, you know what?
Turn off all the machines.
I'm dead.
Just, just no use for me.
Yeah, Rachel's can go out in sunglasses and Doris like, don't do that.
It's rude.
So they go out.
She's like, hello, everyone.
Hello.
Hello, I've just come in from the continent.
Hello.
Oh, I didn't realize how many of these women are socially awkward, quill,
Irka, Sutton.
Well, I knew Sutton was, but...
So Sutton goes up to a guy, and she's like, okay, hi, Greg.
Rick.
Greg.
Rick.
Jonathan.
Rick.
Please change your name.
I just don't like Rick.
Are we going to get there?
Are you going to work with me here?
Thank you.
And there's this guy named Sebastian.
who's a motivational speaker who's probably the hottest of the bunch what'd you say and a crab and a crab and a crab and a crab you think he's the hottest oh well who cheeseball who was could you tell me who was hotter than him the douchebag that rachel was going to be the lawyer yeah yes he's kind of father i mean he was an asshole but he was the hottest and then i think second was the real estate guy that worked with mo before i don't know i mean like if you're going for like old
men country club guys yeah so uh rachel's like oh my god is this like a receiving line or is it like
a flat line because like i'm the flat line i'm like dead i died i died on the line it's like a dead it's like a
flat line the receiving line like they brought a corpse to the receiving line you're shaking hands of
the corpse right now it's literally a dead corpse listen put a mirror under my nose there's not going to be
fog i'm dead so um she's like yeah i um i want the biggest flirt at six years old day camp
i want a ribbon and everything they asked us to choose a husband to marry on
the camp bus guess who i chose the 18 year old camp counselor well i think this is supposed to be a
charming story but instead i left concerned so i did too i was like uh someone check on the
sleep away camp please and so erika's acting nervous which is hilarious oh my god i can't do it
i need to go to the bar i just thought i had to do this you know there's two bees in me this
Erica Jane. Erica Jane can do anything. She can, she can crawl on the ground. She can get blow jobs in an alley. She can sing. Okay, well, she can't sing. Let's be honest. But Erica, Erica's very nervous. Very nervous. Oh, God, so we're back to the Erica has two personality things. Yeah, exactly. I've never seen this version of Erica before. Where's the woman on stage crawling around in heaters? Probably with whips and chains somewhere. Where is she? Where is that, Erica? Oh, there's she.
She is.
All the guys like, good night, everyone.
Good night.
We're going to go home.
So one of the guys is like, oh, I've thought of an icebreaker activity.
Let's just do some ice break.
And let's do it the old-fashioned way.
So, Doreet, how long have you been single?
She's like, oh, God, five minutes a year.
Who knows?
It's painful.
What's I single when I was together?
I don't even knew.
Who is picking?
Who is he? Was there a man in my bed? Was there ever a man in my bed? I could have put him in the oven and come out with croissants if I'd had it on 350 for 12 minutes or so. That's what I'll tell you, buddy.
I like that that guy's idea of a good icebreaker is to ask how long someone's been single for. I'm like, is that an icebreaker or is that an ice maker? So then another guy is like, oh, well, Doreet, I've never heard a lemon referred to as a carcass when it's done.
And she's like, listen, it's clean, it's easy,
and it's a good way to describe my marriage.
It's like, oh, is that how you'd also describe yourself?
Well, I am not easy, but Kyle is though.
Go tell her why I told you so, which is a rich way of saying,
okay, our conversation is done, you can flirt with Kyle now.
You suggested that I was a slut.
And you'd think it's hilarious to dis my carcass out thing.
How dare you, sir?
Yeah.
So she's like, well, I'm out to practice,
but that doesn't mean it's gould.
I mean, I knew I'm a good flea out.
So Bose gives an announcement and thanks him all.
Oh, were you going to say something?
My little darling.
No, I was not going to say anything.
I was just merely going to make noises.
Continue speaking.
We've got stations for ladies to sit and questions I've written,
and we're going to go around until everyone's met Kyle.
Sit here, Erica.
You go inside.
Sutton, just please don't embarrass us as a country.
Just as a country.
So Erica's like, well, I'd be more comfortable on a stage with more clothes.
I mean, with no clothes, sorry.
I'd be comfortable naked on a stage.
So Bose starts a clock, because they each have sessions, because speed dating.
So Kyle's talking to some guy.
She's like, um, so have you been married and is he famous?
And he guys like, well, uh, yes, I have.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, cool.
That's really exciting.
Yeah.
Um, have you ever created a show with John Wells before like I have?
No.
Okay.
He did the pit also.
It's kind of the hit right now.
So I'm just saying did Alicia Silverstone play your mother one?
No? Okay. Moving on. So when we go to Erica, she said, oh, see you a lawyer.
And he goes, uh, well, I was, but I'm not anymore.
Oh, thank God.
And excuse me now, what do you do for fun? You know, because I haven't had fun in so long.
And he goes, well, it's such a sexy dress. How is that not fun? What you're wearing?
Well, I'll tell you this much. Still good it. Still good it.
So then we go back to Sutton and he's like, oh, it's who you are? Are you more dominant or submissive?
And she's like, well, I've learned to be more dominant in my life. And I'm real proud of myself.
You know, last week, I got mad at the grass and I had somebody come over and I had him cut it.
I think the card means sexually. Are you more dominant sexually?
She's like, oh, well, that's rather much of a heathen question if you ask me.
I've been on a lot of bad dates. I went on that one.
that was all about the mother.
Remember that one?
And we see flashbacks of that guy
who just wouldn't stop talking about the mother.
God, I am so sick of those people
that only talk about their mother.
Anyway, let's do another scene with Reba.
I wonder what Reba thinks of this man.
Yeah, I wouldn't describe myself as Dominant.
More dormant.
So he's like, okay, moving on.
So then Rachel is chatting with a guy named Garab.
And he's like, yeah, you might know me
because I started Comic-Con.
but yeah you know so if you're into superheroes I'm just like no I can't like please stop it
no like I just came back to life like please stop yeah I mean you're like you're like my
kryptonite is that a superhero thing because like I want to die right now like please like literally
the only superhero I like is Deadpool because that's like literally me I'm like a dead
pool a pool of like extensions just like dead right now like dad I'm over I'm over it so there's
a huge douche oh good I just want to say when I was like whoa this guy's
started Comic-Con? That's major. But then I looked it up. And this guy started like an alternate
Comic-Con called like Ace Comic-Con, which I'm sure is a perfectly fine convention. But for him to be
like, I started Comic-Con when there's like a very well-established internationally famous
Comic-Con. And then there's also your Comic-Con. You're a little bit of a con artist, I have to
say. But that being said, but that being said also, I love that like, she doesn't, she doesn't know
this. All she knows is this guy says he started Comic-Con. And that's like, if I heard that,
I'd be like, whoa, that's major. And she just does not care. She's like, Comic-Con. So it's like
a convention for like nerds that like millions of people guys. Well, it does say he's founder. He's chairman
and CEO of Wizard Entertainment and also a co-founder and CEO of Ace Comic-Con. But is that
the regular one? Because it says Comic-Con founder on his Instagram. Is Ace Con the Comic-Con? And they
just call it Comic-Con? So the San Diego.
Diego Comic-Con is a comic book convention
and multi-genre entertainment event
held annually.
I don't know why I became Lisa Vanderpun,
but she just had to jump in there.
But the founders, it was started in 1970
by Sheldorf,
Richard Alf, Ken Kruker, and Mike Tarrie,
Ron Graf, Barry Alonzo,
Bob Sork, Scott Shaw,
John Pound, Roger Friedman,
David Clark, and Greg Bear.
And as far as I can tell,
I don't see Garib in there.
There's no Garib's in there, Garib.
Uh-oh, Garib.
but you're a fucking Comic-Con scanner.
That is exactly what that is, okay?
Because we all know San Diego Comic-Con is the one.
That's the one, people.
So Erica is talking to the biggest douchebag in the room,
and he's like, yeah, I don't date a lot of girls in Los Angeles.
Girls here are pretty bad.
She just goes, oh, God.
I love when guys do that as if they're like some great trophy.
Like, you think you are, sir?
Really?
And also, like, really smart moves.
Like, you're sitting down with a woman being like, God, the women in L.A. are just pieces of shit, huh?
Like, oh, geez.
So we go to Doreet.
He's doing the game.
That's what he's doing.
He's negging.
He's trying to make her feel insecure.
So that way she's attracted to him more.
Like, this is a guy who 100% 20 years ago read the game.
It was like, I'm taking all those lessons.
I'm going to look up mystery and find out what he's doing.
Was that that guy's name?
Mystery.
You know what I'm talking about?
Yeah, yeah.
I remember that.
Yeah, with a hat.
Gross.
Yeah.
Uh, so, um, the only worst, the only guy worse than that is the salt guy, the guy who comes in and goes like this with salt.
Salt Bay.
Yeah.
Oh, I hate that guy.
How did that go viral?
Like, I don't understand why that went viral.
I just, I hate him.
Yeah, I hate him.
Okay, so my favorite conversation is Doreet with this next guy.
She's, he goes, so where do you live?
This side of town?
She says, hmm, we're on the west side, right?
And he's like, no, this is more.
like the east side.
Mm-hmm.
Well, I don't know what side I live on.
I live in a place called the Vili.
Have you heard of it?
And he's like, uh, oh, okay.
Well, do you know where it is?
And he's like, uh, that way.
Well, could you find out?
Because I want to make sure I get back there and chew.
Doreen, I don't know where I am.
I just get into a car and I show up.
I just don't have a house somewhere.
You live on the extreme west side of the valley, Doree.
That's where you live.
right she isn't she in like isn't that Encino it's like on the west side of the
valley she lives in Encino which is well the west side west side of the valley'll be like
Woodland Hills but it's still more Western Valley she's on the other side of the
four or five she's like I don't know where I am east side west side
west side to the east side no diggedy where am I know who I don't know where I am I
I just love just she just gets in cars and arrives in places and has no spatial
awareness she's like she could be in Kentucky for all she
knows. So Rachel is talking to the douchebag guy and she's like, oh my God, it's like musically,
like, who's amazing? He goes, I don't know, like the Rolling Stones. No, wait, but like, what about
like Chris Martin though? He goes, Coldplay sucks. White women love Coldplay. Like, okay. And like,
this guy's like saying white women love Coldplay. Coldplay sucks. You just said the Rolling Stones.
Not that the Rolling Stones suck, but like, I'm pretty sure that's also.
white women too this guy has so many issues with women my god like he wasn't he the one who was just
like yeah women in l.a suck and he's like oh white women love cold play what this guy he's probably
fucking problem he's probably still listening to his like outcast CD from 2003 trying to get
credit from that being like yeah man speaker box that's an album it's like okay congratulations
he's like hey yeah that's music so rachel's like
Yeah.
When I was younger, like, I was always in love with the wrong time.
And I realized now that, like, I'm still her.
Yeah.
I'm still her.
I shouldn't be able to choose.
Don't let me choose a man.
And we just cut back to her and she's like giggling and smacking his leg.
Like, he's just so hilarious.
Like, yep, you picked the worst one.
Yep.
The first time in 20 years of Bravo that we've seen Rachel Zoh get animated and giggle.
She's like, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
You're crazy saying that about that.
Cold play. I mean, by the way, it is hilarious that she, I never would have thought Rachel
Zoh, of all people, would be like, I really like club play. Like, that was not what I expected.
I thought she was going to say some DJ, like, you know, like, DJ Frankfurter, like, so good.
Like, he's like playing at a party tomorrow night. Like, I'm actually going to go. He's actually
like a friend of mine, but he's like actually kind of hot. Like, we kind of have a thing going
on, but like whatever. I don't know. I die.
Cold play. Yeah. I feel like she wants, like, also, none of these guys are for Rachel's
though. I think she wants a guy who has long.
longer hair. Like, he's like hipster. It's kind of edgy, you know, huge bag.
Yeah. I like, right. Um, so now we go to Kyle. She's talking to some real estate agent
named Chase. And she goes, oh my God, my husband would die. We're separated and goes, yeah,
I know your husband. We had a deal. She goes, oh, yeah, I'm sure you did. I can't get away
from Mo, especially when I bring him up. Yeah. Like, it's like everywhere. Like, every time I'm
talking to someone and I'm like, oh my God, I used to be married.
to Maricio. They're like, I know Maricio. I'm like, oh, my God, I cannot get away from him.
Like, why do people keep talking about him?
Yes, but he does make good deals. So then Doreet's talking to another, she's talking to
the self-help guy, I guess. That's what he is, right? Or self-home speaker or something.
God, we're overrun with them right now on Bravo. Enough. So he's like, yeah, I'm married
a stranger in Vegas for a day. That was on my bucket list. And Dorek goes,
I was just going to say, that's a bucket list thing. And you did he? She got married. She got married.
He's like, well, it's legal in your country.
Well, when I turn the charm on, I'm not just a giggle type.
I'm more in the eyes, the hair flip, the three different accents I do at once.
Whenever in doubt, just say, it's a bucket list thing, mm?
All right, the guys all love to read, but they also all loves, and all the girls love Sebastian.
And, um, they're all saying, oh, yeah, they, um, this guy's, that there's,
like, yeah, I think that, like, yeah, I think they're good together because they both have accents.
Everyone says, I'm loquacious. And I say, what's that? Is that a location that we're in?
Does that mean, if you're locacious, does that mean you don't know the location that you're
actually been driven to? I've just learned. I live on the west side.
And Sebastian's like, wow, loquacious, what a word.
Mm-hmm.
Big one.
That was a big one.
Erica, Erica's talking to Gaila, and she's like, so you're a nerd.
So I spotted you a mile away.
Tell me more.
He's like, yeah, I grew up.
Like, what's that most, picker?
Go ahead.
You got five seconds.
You know, if you grew a pot belly and we're about 20 years older, I'd actually find you sexy.
So he says, yeah.
Well, I grew up really into comic books and sports cards.
Yeah, oh, I love a sports car.
I just want to get it one and drive it all.
He's like, no cards.
Oh, sports cards.
I didn't know cards was a sport, but whatever.
Um, so she's like, yeah, I've got no game.
Now she's talking to the douchebag and she goes, oh, so you're in law, huh?
So what are you, a slimy weasel?
And he's like, uh, yeah, like you look so offended, but she's the first.
person who shut this fucker up. So I was actually really proud of Erica because she's the first one
that got that guy like, oh, oh, whoa, whoa. So then Rick is talking to Sutton. He goes, I love your
accent. I mean, mine comes back back when I'm home. I've been fortunate to be in baseball,
represent a bunch of baseball players. I'm basically famous. I'm famous by proxy.
What doesn't wait, Sutton owns a baseball team, doesn't she? I think so. Yeah. Maybe that's why they were
talking about it. Yeah.
She did. I think she did.
And so he's like, she's like, well, I'm interested. I could like Rick.
And so now Bose kicks all the men out because time's up.
And so it's like, nice meeting y'all. Bye, bye, Rick.
And then Rick on his way out, it's like, Erica, cut your heart.
Here's my card. Give me a call sometime. Please. Please.
And basically, does not give the number or two or sudden.
So Rachel is like, I love Bose. And there's like nothing I won't do for her.
but I knew there was like zero percent chance
I was meeting a guy at speed dating.
Like, does anyone here even know how to play guitar?
I don't even think so.
Dead dating? I'm in.
Speed dating? No.
So the girls gather outside, and Rachel's like,
wow, Doree, you were, like, so amazing at flirting.
Like, that was fantastic.
Use, like, 30 different accents.
Like, I've never seen anybody pull out, like,
their app for, like, Rosetta Stone before.
But, like, that was amazing.
Good job.
Well, they do say I'm laquacious, so I'm very good in these locations, of situations.
Well, what a word, really?
Tonight was a boost of confidence.
I feel like fun fleurity to read was back, and it felt good.
It took fun flirtie to read a long time to get back to me,
but that's because she had no idea if she was on the west side or the east side,
but now once the Barting and the soul connected, it's been all great.
So
DeBose is asking their favorite guy
And they all agree
It was the Aussie
Self-help guru
And so it's like
Well, I kind of liked Rick
And Erica's like
Oh really?
Well, did Rick give him his card
Because Rick gave me his card
Oh
She's like, well
I'm just saying
Your attorney husband
Didn't work out too well
So maybe you should reconsider
That slut
It's just to read
In the corner laughing
but also having her soul exit her body temporarily to go get coffee.
It's back.
I've all got coffee.
All right, ladies, gather around, gather around.
I'm about to do something very important in the spirit of kindness and friendship and goodwill to those less fortunate than me.
Sutton, please take the card of the hot man that didn't like you.
Oh, gosh, I just want to prove that I'm a good friend.
Like, wow, nothing showing good friend, like pointing out in front of everybody that the only person, Sutton liked you and not her.
Yeah, you're such. Enjoy these floppy seconds that I never had in the first place.
Here, take my hello, fresh box.
Commercials. Here comes one right now.
So, uh, I was just like, but they do, they do view this as like a, a lovely gesture.
They're like, oh, that was nice. And so Doreits, like, coil.
Are you actively looking for someone?
And is that person a boy or a girl?
Can we get to the bottom of it?
She's like, um, of course not.
Like, whatever.
She's like, but what do you mean?
I mean, you're not looking, right?
She's like, but I'm not three years in.
It's like, oh, well, um, I just like, I just want to be married again.
Aww.
And everyone's like, huh?
Me married.
And Eric goes like, Doreen, hey Doreen, come over here for five minutes.
Come out, let's have a private talk.
All right, come on.
So they go off and then set and just immediately.
follows them. She's like,
my ass, I'm going to sit down, I'm going to listen
to everything. I'm going to, well, I'll
tell you what you're not going to do. Have private
time. Okay. I'm here too.
Hey, delete. I just want to
check in on you. Okay, a sudden
you just sit right there. Okay. So did
your kids go to Florida or whatever? Because
this is a really uninteresting storyline that I
feel compelled to ask you about because the producer
said, hey, go ask to read a question in the other
room so that way Kyle could have a scene outside with Bose.
They did go.
They did go. And,
And finally, they fast-hound me from Florida.
And finally, I had my baby back.
I saw Tigger on the feet of them.
Did they go to me?
I have a question.
Did they go to Disney World and Disneyland, because Disneyland's on the West Coast and Disney
World's on the East Coast.
Ooh, who's Laquacious mouth?
Hi.
So you have to take care of yourself.
You know, because when I look at you, I see you are a lady who does not get pampered, does not have free time, can't just putter around her kitchen, drinking Coca-Cola's and putting rings on her fingers.
You need to take care of yourself for once.
And Erica's like, here's the deal.
When you're going through a divorce, you've got to be in a good state of mind because anything and everything will be used against you.
Got starving all offense, people on fire, plane crash victims.
How are you got to be counter against you?
stolen earrings that are with $4 million that you're bragging about
because maybe they were funded by the plot of some other people.
They don't use anything they can get against you.
But men, men can get away with everything.
Your husband's going to die in jail.
I think that she's largely right, but yes.
Oh, yeah, she is right.
She is right.
But she's like the first person, deliver it.
No, of course she's right, but it's just Erica.
It's like, oh my gosh.
So Sutton's like, okay, well, here's the thing.
You will survive this, but you know what?
It sucks. And you suck. And I'm so sorry.
I'm so sorry that a sucky person is going through a sucky time.
I'm so sorry to read. And she's like, oh, to see a different sort of Sutton.
She's telling it from a heart, a cold, cold, crispy, crunchy, shriveled up little heart.
And it feels Jean-Ewing. It feels Jean-Huing.
So I appreciate it.
It takes me back to 1995.
Seeing a commercial that announced the softer side of Sears, and I thought, wow, gee, there's another side of Sears, I never realized.
Gee!
Well, I see myself in this broken wing she's walking around with, and it's the hardest thing to watch.
Ew! Did someone summon me? There's a broken bird in Hollywood.
I'd love to help you, but Kyle's still here. Call me when you get rid of the skank.
Just poofs out.
So Boz, Rachel, and Kyle are talking in the other section.
And Bose is like, well, I want to be a good friend to anybody, everybody, Kyle, Kyle, there's somebody.
I'm trying to peer back the onion of Kyle.
Kyle, let me peel that.
Oh, Kyle, stinky, stinky onions, stinky onions.
So, Kyle, tell me, did it spark?
And if not, tell me, girl, what do you want?
Would you want?
What do you want?
Just tell me.
Do you want a manny?
You want a big, long hair, short hair, vagina, penis.
Go ahead.
Tell me.
Tell me.
And just know that if you.
bring me to tears. It's only because you're an onion and it has nothing to do with my emotional
state. It's just a chemical reaction to being near you, Carl. She's like, well, um, thanks a lot.
I mean, I'm not the only single one here, so I don't know why everyone's asking me questions all
the time. But you, well, you just don't want to hook up to hook up, right? You don't want to just
be like, right? Mark, is that what you're saying? You don't want you just like, you don't want to
but what do you want, Kyle? What do you want? And Rachel's like, one night kind of a girl, are you? You're like,
you would, like, die. I would die if I did that, unless it was like Chris Martin. I would totally
hook up with Chris Martin. Like, I die. I die. I literally die for Chris Martin. So, Carl asked,
well, how long have you been in love? And she's like, three times. And Rachel's like, four.
Oh, God, I'm so embarrassed to admit that. But four, four. One was with an ice cream truck guy when
I was like, I don't know, 13 and he was probably 19. So it was inappropriate. But it counts.
And Kyle's like, well, I've been in love three times two. It's like, okay, well, nice
try to change the conversation, but we're still going to ask you questions.
Does that mean you've been in love three times or six times?
Because three times two, or you're doing math?
I can't tell what's going on here.
She's like, um, I don't know.
What answer is the better answer to get you guys to stop, ask me this question?
We'll see I has three.
We'll go with three.
Yeah, three.
So she goes, have you found love?
And she said, that's like a good feeling to find love.
Like I actually fell in love just like last week.
But it was like a Versacee jacket.
And I just like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, I did.
I did find love.
I did. And she goes, no, but now you don't have it anymore, Kyle. And she's like, but now I just, I'm, I'm, I'm on my own again. Oh, Kyle, you're still dating that girl. I don't believe it. Oh, by the way, I also have to apologize to you and to the whole audience because I've been getting comments all week that are like, Ronnie, duh, Morgan has been out of the closet. She's out of the closet. I went on this whole thing last week. I took up everybody's like, oh my God. And Ben was like, no, I think she's out of the closet. And I was like, nope, she's absolutely not. The reason I said that was because when this was
going on last year. I was Googling it and reading Reddit threads about it. And everything
I found says that Morgan will not talk about it. She says no, which to me means in the closet,
but people are telling me that she's been out of the closet. She just is private about her life,
I guess. So my pity is kind of waning here. Because if you're out of the closet, then I don't
want to hear it from you, Kyle. Talk about it. Miss open and honest. Get to yapping.
Yeah. Get to yapping on your face.
I don't know where I sometimes you just have to say get to yapping period and not add a preposition because then we have the period's okay yeah I'm a preposition queen okay when I'm supposed to have my period I go for the preposition and then I get myself to the trouble time and time again I cannot help it I cannot help it well Kyle is saying oh both is acting like she's never heard anything or seen anything and she's like asking all these questions
And I'm like, okay, okay, Bose.
Like, you don't, you don't ever, like, read people magazine.
Okay.
Like, you don't know what's going on with Kyle.
Like, I'm pretty famous.
So, uh, yeah, like, hello, like, I kind of, like, invented, like, like, the show.
So, like, so was it your choice or was it not your choice?
Because, um, it's complicated.
Sorry.
I just, I know I could just, like, answer your questions normally,
but I just want to keep having you ask me questions because it feels really good
to be, like, center of attention once.
So Bose is like, okay, well, it's really hard for Kyle to be vulnerable, but I'm really glad that she's at least sharing a little bit because I want to be there for her in support any way I can.
This new, this new, like, characterization of Kyle as this heavily guarded person that's hard to get to know.
This is, that's not, that's not Kyle.
Like, Kyle is always yammering about every single thing in her life that makes her feel sad and she, like, trembles her lip.
But she's doing it now.
Now she's like, I just need to be private right now.
And it's just, it's funny because as they say how difficult it is for Kyle to be vulnerable,
when Kyle is the queen of being open and honest, like that's her whole thing is be open and honest, open and honest.
And yet for some reason, now all of a sudden she's the one that they have to do baby steps with it to be vulnerable.
It's like, I can't.
I can't deal with us anymore.
But it's so funny because Kyle gives for nothing.
She's just like, it's dot, dot, dot, dot complicated.
And Bose is like, wow, look at Carl opening up.
That's all I needed. That's all I needed because I'm a girl's girl, Kyle. I want to be in everyone's business. And she's like, okay, well, why don't you just ask what you want to ask, Bose? Okay? I could go Bradder. I could go Angelina. That's what you want to say, right? Just say it. That's like a shockingly serious moment because the previews had us believe it was like this hilarious moment. But it comes off as kind of like her being like, well, just say it. You want to out me in front of America? Just do it. Do it. Do it to the community, Bose. Not just to me. Look every homosexual.
teenager in the face that's not ready to talk about it and you do this to them so then
Kyle's like my biggest worry after separation was being alone but finding someone you have a lot in
common with is like really really exciting you know like for instance um like we're both like
we're both child actresses and we both are competitive with our sisters um and we both know
know, Jamie Lee Curtis, and we both started TV shows, Alicia Silverstone.
Like, this person, like, we're, like, very, very similar.
We've found, like, a lot in common.
What I'm saying is I masturbate.
I actually, I would love that as an answer.
So, Carl's like, well, I've always been attracted to men, you know, it's all dark and handsome.
But does that apply to women, too?
It's like, never that I'm allowed to ask.
And Kyle's like, well, I'm just like, well, I'm just like,
worried you know like what if I go out with someone and then Mo's upset by it and
like what if the girls are upset you left your husband for a woman stop this
crying I can't grow a pair already grow your heels so Rachel's like well you
don't have to know Kyle you know you've been like with Mo forever and it's okay to be
you and it's okay to connect with you know like look it's like I told Mo
when I just told him and saw him in Aspen it's totally fine for you to dance
around and sing Tiffany songs at karaoke to try and get 20-year-old
Poussay say. It's just what you're...
What? What did you talk?
Sorry, sorry. That's neither here.
What are you saying, Kyle?
Um, this is also my favorite part is somewhere in the middle of this.
I think we talked about it at length, uh, during the trailer trash, but at length, I think
when Kyle says that she could go Brad or Angelina, they cut to Rachel, and she has this
moment where there's like a piece of string that's like pulling her head back.
She's like, wha. She's like yanked awake. Like, she was like a marionette that was like sagging
down to the floor and someone was like, oh shit, we're on.
Like, get the thing ready. And the street's like, what?
I'm reanimated. I'm alive. I was dead, but I'm alive.
I'm sorry, but somebody actually mentioned actual friends of mine.
It just woke me up for a second. And a realization came to me.
You're not getting either one of them. So,
brought in your license. You know what I mean? Yeah, they're like famous.
So, Kyle saying, uh, you know, I've gone through a lot in the last three years.
I've changed my perspective. I'm sad, but I'm also grateful. Like, you can
be a wife and a mother and get like lost with who you are.
And both says, well, I'm going back into my contact list
and looking for para lesbians.
Just no, no, no, no.
I'm like a fate kind of person.
I just kind of want to like meet someone
where Richel meet someone, like in a famous circle.
So yeah.
How were you a fate person?
You met your girlfriend by DMing her.
Okay, so what the hell?
So now we go to out of this party.
This was like half the episode.
So now we go.
We go to another white house.
I thought it was so funny because in one of the lines here,
Sutton's like, oh, my God, I love a white house.
Well, that's good because every single house on here is a white house.
White box house.
So we go to Kyle's house.
It says Kyle's house.
And then it's like, wait a second.
It's Amanda's house because Amanda lives in Kyle's old house.
And we see like a glimpse into Amanda's world.
And we'll see everything around.
And there's like a piece of wall art that's like a black Amex card.
It's like, she knows money.
And she has all these kids in there,
and her fiance, Eddie, is, they're all in the kitchen.
I think we only get to, we only find out, like, some of their names.
It was like Shoshana and Kanan or Canaan.
And then I think maybe there's like one other,
like one other girl we get to find out whose name it is.
But then Shoshana and Canaan are like,
painting something on the table.
She's like, hey, Kane, that's my side.
Hey, guys, what if we both paint on both sides?
and like we work together collaboratively.
I'm like, your children are going to be a monster.
Or, well, it could be monsters.
Okay?
The answer is, get the fuck off that.
Get your brush off the fuck of her side.
Paint your side, Canaan.
So the producer's like, so how does growing up in Oklahoma differ from where you're,
the way your children are growing up?
And she's like, um, how do I say this?
Um, yeah, I came from very humble beginnings.
and my kids are rich as fuck.
So, yeah, we didn't have a lot on Friday night,
so we would just hang out at Walmart.
I mean, I would walk around Walmart for fun.
That actually sounds pretty good to me.
I mean, I had plenty of a walk around a store night, you know?
Yeah, that sounds great.
Where did you guys walk around?
We had the mall.
We had the mall.
We'd go to the movies, go to the diner.
I'm trying to think, like, we'd walk around the mall.
But that wouldn't be really, at night,
it wouldn't be walking around the mall.
At night, it was like going to a friend's house a lot and watching like a video.
I mean, I was like in two groups.
I was in, because I joined my high school in sophomore year.
So I skipped all the middle school bullshit that everyone went through.
So I didn't have to be locked into a group.
So I was like, you know, the band who always wanted to be popular, like ingratiated his way into the popular kids group.
But I actually didn't hang out with him that much because I just didn't.
But every once in a while I did hang out with him and I got to go to like a party where there was like,
drinking and that was like so cool but like the people that I usually hung out with who were like
more like my real friends we just like go to each other's houses and like watch movies like
impromptu drinking soda yeah you know who doesn't love a judy davis movie like judy davis and
chopin hello wasn't that what that movie was she's like yeah i was walking around wall
wait what movie showpan isn't it like impromptu that movie impromptu jude
Davis. I think that she's in that. The first one I saw of hers was husbands and wives a long
time ago. I'm sorry. Judy Davis was George Sand and Hugh Grant was Chopin. And Mandy Patinkin
is Alfred de Mouss in case someone cares. And burned up Peters as Marie. I got to rewatch this movie.
This is a, this is a gay phantasmagoria. Burned up Peters. What? So she's like,
well, my God, my kids are never going to grasp it. The reason I walk them around like Beverly Hills
in a stroller, like, get them ice cream or lunch or whatever, is because, like, I want them
to see, like, what I didn't have? I'm like, or maybe because it's their neighborhood. Like,
what else you're going to do? Like, I'm up in a closet. You walked them around Beverly Hills
and buy them ice cream because that's where you fucking live, Amanda. She's like, but I want them
to, like, I drink this for them. And we walk the streets that, like, I watched the streets
on Clueless. That was a strange. I didn't know how I felt about that. On the one hand,
I was like, I know what she's talking about because a lot of times when I'm just driving around L.A.
And like, if I'm like driving down Rodeo drive, it's like, oh, I got to get to Rodeo drive.
I'm like, it's so weird that this is just like a street.
I'm driving down when it's like you grow up as a kid watching Clueless and it's like, whoa, rodeo drive.
And now it's just like a road, right?
So like I get that on the one hand.
But on the other hand, it feels weird because it feels like she just like moved out here to live, take over chairs, shares lifestyle.
She did.
I'm going to be here.
did. That's what she's saying. And that's what, you know, that's what kind of hit me watching this. And we're singing on two shows right now because Vanderpump rules as the manifester Venus. He's like, oh, my God, I like totally manifested everything in my life. And on one hand, you're like, well, you're a waiter though. But on the other hand, you're on a TV show and you're a star now. And that's kind of the thing with her. So maybe they're manifesting works. You know, you've got two people who are like kind of making it. And so and they're just kind of dodo birds, both of them. So. Well, the key is. We should pay for those.
I, okay, I want Amanda to stand outside the gas station under Circus Liquor and see,
like, if she's going to do the clueless thing, see it all the way through.
Well, that's, you know, and that also made me thing because I was like, well, maybe my
manifesting is broken because whenever I pass that clown liquor store and I see that, which I pass
all the time, I'm like, oh my God, I manifested the valley.
I manifested the valley.
Did it.
I just want you to know, by the way, to anyone who is driving to circus liquor just to see it
from Clueless, that's at the corner of Burbank and Vineland Avenues.
There is a little donut shop there called Perfect Donuts,
and they do an excellent bodega-style breakfast sandwich there.
I'm just going to let you know that right now,
and their donuts are actually quite excellent,
and it's just this little under-the-radar donut shop.
So is there a liquor.
Well, not the circus liquor.
Yeah.
So Eddie goes, so she's talking about how Eddie's going to Disney Monday,
And we worked, we met five years ago and he works in construction.
And you guys, before daddy proposed, I kept having this dream that he got me a ring with a smart and final logo on it.
Could you imagine?
Which is funny because, you know, the proposal, get this marriage probably isn't smart and it probably won't be final.
Yeah.
So she's like, yeah, once we were living together, he asked me what I wanted, like my purdys.
So that's like my purdys.
Yeah, she does hit Bruce.
And I was about to turn 36, and I was like, there's more of an expiration date on my ovaries than a ring.
So, like, let's have kids first.
So we did it.
And we just started making babies.
And you guys, it took me, it took a long time for us to get engaged, but daddy crushed it.
Look at my ring.
Now, look, manifesting stuff for you is great.
But, like, she just posted a picture of her baby in a crib or something, like, covered in $100 bills that she just dropped.
Don't raise assholes.
You know what I mean?
It's too late.
Like it's too late.
It's okay if you grew up poor and you're like, I want money and then you went out and got money.
I mean, that's good.
There's like a Cinderella story there, but kids who are already rich, just teaching them to be obsessed with money and only money, you're raising four assholes.
And I'm telling you that right now.
At least three of those kids are going to be sociopath assholes.
Prove me wrong in 20 years.
Well, it's good to earn that money because you'll need it for rehab probably.
So then Amanda is like, well, she's like, hey, kids.
Daddy got me the exact ring that's been on my vision board.
Literally.
It's because it's on your vision board.
He can see it.
He saw it.
You probably emailed him your vision board every goddamn day until he bought you that thing.
As a financial empowerment teacher and coach, I'm the biggest, I'm the embodiment of everything I teach.
I'm my biggest testimonial.
Guys, look at everything I did.
I have an American Express painting on my wall.
So, like, yeah.
Someone who was like in one of my courses was like, of course,
Amanda wouldn't come through manifesting a man.
Amanda comes through manifesting a whole ass family.
Oh my God.
I love that person, whoever she was.
He said that thing that I told her to say.
So then we go to Rachel's and Sutton comes over and she's like, oh, my God, I love your house.
I have a pension for white houses and people.
So thanks for having me over.
Oh, so you drink white wine.
I love white wine.
I love white house.
I love white house.
I love white wine.
Yeah.
I love white wine.
Yeah.
And I love white house is wine wine.
That's good.
I brought you some white mine.
Yeah.
Pat for the year.
Why.
Right.
Oh, my God.
Well, here we are.
Isn't this a fun life to say?
Oh, my God.
This is going great.
I die.
I die for people life to say.
Wow.
The chemistry.
Got to feel it.
Okay.
So Rachel's like, yeah, I know Sutton because like we know other people like I'll see her around at like parties and stuff.
You know, because like she knows Kathy.
I know Kathy.
Like especially around the holidays.
Like it's where that's when you have to invite Sutton.
So like I'll see her, but like I don't really know her.
She is.
Anyway, sat and have a seat.
Rachel's like, yeah, like, she's always someone who invites me, like, very, is, like, very friendly and, like, outgoing and invites me to all these things.
I just, like, never was, like, very close with her, which is her way of saying, she's always invited me to shit and I never go to it because she annoys me.
But now I'm going to get to know her because we're on a TV show.
Or she tries really hard, but I've never, like, had to, I've never been cornered long enough to have to have a conversation with her.
But here we are.
I don't, I don't associate myself with reality folk, but now I've lowered myself back into this world.
So can we talk about Boz's house?
Like, I can't believe we did a speed dating thing.
Did she really think we're going to, like, date those normies?
Like, it's crazy.
Does any of them even play at Coachella?
I don't think so.
I didn't even know, like, there was a name for this.
Like, did you know, like, what?
Speed dating?
There's like a name for speed dating.
Like, really?
Seriously?
Like, I die.
Like, did you think any of those guys were cute?
Like, how ugly were they?
They were so disgusting.
They were so, like, I was like, how desperate are these women who'd actually
want to date these people?
So I was like, I thought they were all cute in house open.
They don't give me their numbers, but that's okay.
Well, I'll tell you this.
I would have thought it would be real cute if my phone rang, but they didn't.
So they were all thuggos.
Okay.
That's where I'm going to go with it.
Well, I feel like I'm like so fresh out of marriage that I'm like enjoying not being married.
Like every guy that I met there, I just said, thank you so much for not being Raj.
And, you know, that was good enough for me.
So like, would you get married again?
And she's like, well, get this.
I found out that over a year ago, my husband filed for an annulment.
in the Catholic Church.
Oh, my God.
How would you know?
Like, do you go to Catholic Church?
No.
Do you get letters from them?
Well, I did.
Why would you talk to the Catholic Church?
They're gross.
They're like not even celebrities.
Like, maybe the Pope is.
Like, everyone else, not really.
They love poverty.
Well, guess what?
Within our church, our marriage never existed.
Oh, yeah.
Sort of like you on my social calendar.
Yes.
But when I got the letter from the Catholic Church,
it just came to the residence of Strach Brown.
Oh, my God.
I don't get it.
Why do they add a color?
Is that like your color palette?
Strach brown.
Like, no, my name.
My maiden name is brown.
Oh, how uncheek, gross, disgusting.
And I just get looking at it.
Strack brown.
You know what?
Maybe I'll change my name back to brown.
Oh, God.
Don't do that.
No.
Why would you do that?
That's not the color of the year.
Pantone's color of the year is white.
Like white houses, not brown houses.
Well, yeah, I dropped my married name the day I left.
I mean, I never really.
took it. Let's be honest. But still, like, I would have. And she's like, well, the truth is, I'm not a track. Yes, you are. You had those babies and you can keep that name as long as you want. You're a child to name. And if you want to keep that name, that's your name. Keep it. It's cuter than Brown. Sorry. It is. You need to, you need to, like, unstrack yourself. Like, you need to distract. Like, guess what? You, I hope you get pulled over for texting. And the, and the police officer says you were a distracted driver because, like, you need to unstrack, distract. The track.
Be less tracked.
Be extract.
Extract.
Extract.
Okay, Rachel, I'm going to stop you right now because I think you're having a little bit of a brain connoption.
But I get what you're saying.
I will take the track off.
I think it's just the last little thread, though.
It's the last little thread that that holds me together to that family.
You know what I mean?
And she says, I always felt like I could get Christian back whenever I wanted to.
You know, and sometimes there's the time we talk and we get along and I think, God, did I just win him back?
Is he going to take me back?
going to take me back?
Sometimes when he calls up and he says,
Sutton, why am I paying for these things?
You have to stop coming in the middle of the night
and ringing the doorbell in my house and running away.
I think, God, he does still love me.
But now I'm realizing he don't.
So she's like, I just think about my grandchildren.
I mean, grandma and grandpa's track over there,
the good ones with all the houses.
And I'm just grandmammy Brown,
14 dogs, 18 cats, a mother that won't die.
You know how it is.
Ew.
You have 14 dogs and 18 cats.
That's actually kind of gross.
I'm going to leave.
It's your house.
I know.
I'm never coming back to her again.
It's your house now.
I'm literally burning this house down.
Just get out.
I have a brown in my house with cats.
Like, I can't.
When Kias comes back from camp,
can just give them that boarding address?
Just like send them there.
She's so funny, though.
She goes, I mean, like, Sutton Brown, that's not bad.
What's your middle name?
Thurman.
Okay.
Well, yeah, that's hard.
harder harder all right well you're basically fucked and i was right to never go to any of your
parties but thanks for coming by you want to take the pussy say i feel bad for you do you mind if i
just start calling you not umma thanks so much so now we have alexia alexia and kyle go to the florist
so i have to issue a massive apology really only to my friend neal has he turned 50 yesterday
and for his 50th birthday happy birthday and for his 50th birthday i got him the gift
of outrage at me because I was saying
such mean things about Geary's
and he was like, Ben, I loved
that scene like Geary's. It was everything I wanted.
He's like, you're not, you're clearly not from the South.
We're like registries and family registries
and everything is like everything. And I was like,
I definitely am not. So I apologize to Neal
because I would never want him to be upset on his 50th birthday.
But I stand by everything I said. I do not think that
Alexia is a Geary's kind of girl.
But of course, ever since then, I've seen Geary's everywhere.
I saw some TV show, someone brought something in the bag
as I said, Geary's.
It's like, Gehries is haunting me now.
You're never gonna get away from Gehries.
I'm never going to get away.
So now, Alexia and Kyle go to this florist.
It's called Orchid Republic, which I don't know why I thought
that was so funny.
Like, welcome to Orchid Republic.
And there's this lady Margarita, who is the floral designer.
And she's like, so what sort of color scheme
and flowers are you thinking about?
And she's like, I don't we have a scheme?
I just, I do want like something colorful and Bohemian.
Oh, you know, just, just,
like Geary's, by the way. I just want to point out. God, I love all that bohemian stuff they have
at Geary is the perfect match for Alexia. My $10,000 a plate China. You know, just something
bohemian. Yeah, and I want like wild, unique-looking flowers. Like, you know, like, I'm into
artichokes. You know, those ladies like, you're in Beverly Hills right now and you want
aren't the chokes? Go back to Van Nuys. That shit was funny, though. I think that sounds pretty. Just put
Arctic jokes on the table. It is pretty.
It sounds very cute.
I actually like Alexia's vision for this.
And Kyle's like, um, Alexia's ideas give me a little stress sometimes because like my
wedding was like more traditional, kind of like black tie and like a very, like a country
club and like I had 12 bridesmaids and like very traditional flowers and Faye Riznick was there.
And like we had like pink and white roses and like Alexia's like my earth child.
She's like a free spirit and she's like very eclectic.
I'm like, it all makes sense.
Gehries, it totally makes sense why you bring her there.
It totally matches Alexis's aesthetic.
I'm so glad you did that, Kyle.
So they look at stuff
And Carl's like, this is giving artichoke
And they just talk about her style and stuff
And her bridesmaids and she's like, so you're not going to have bridesmaids
She goes, no, I am having bridesmaids, mother
She goes, but you said you weren't having bridesmaids?
She goes, but I am.
Okay, so they're just not going to be in matching dresses?
No, they are going to be matching dresses
But you said you didn't want them in the same color
But they're still matching though, mother.
She's like, oh my God, this is so hard.
And I just want to point out that after Alexia says all the stuff about like,
how she just wants something like different and like Bohemian and Kyle's like, I just want
my daughter to pick out pink and white flowers. She picks out pink and white flowers.
Like she just, after all this bohemian stuff, she just takes a, she gets like, chooses like a very
generic, perfectly pretty wedding palette. I think that she picked a couple of the like, you know,
frilly, the different ones. And then Kyle added in the pink and the white ones as well.
Because they didn't like the pink and the white one didn't look right with what the daughter
had picked, you know, they looked out of place.
What I can't tell is, is Alexia just trying on her, like, bohemian persona because she thinks
that's cool, but she's ultimately a Geary's girl down inside?
Or is she a bohemian type?
And Kyle is forcing a Geary's persona on her.
I cannot figure that one out.
And it keeps me out.
Well, I think it's not bohemian.
I think it's like, boho chic because this girl's not, like, going to have some
poor wedding, you know, she's not going to be like, let's get married in the, you know,
the farm or whatever. So then, you know, Kyle, let's find a way for Kyle to make this about
her sister thing, you know. Here comes Kyle's pity party about the stupid-ass scene. Oh my God,
this drove me nuts. It's just strange to think that my daughter, I mean, our daughter is getting
married and like, we're not together. And when I look at Alexia and Jay getting married,
I just hope that they have a long, happy marriage that they can always trust each other,
and then neither one ever hurts each other. And I hope that Jake always looks at Lexi in the way he looks at it.
Kyle, you are, this very sweet, and of course you will hurt her.
And of course, this marriage is going to fail.
So don't even, you don't even have to stress about it.
Just know it will happen.
And then you can release it and enjoy yourself.
Just enjoy it while at last.
That's what I say.
So Bose goes to a restaurant with Amanda.
So they're going to have lunch.
And Amanda's like, can I have an iced tea?
She asked it.
She's like, can I eat an ice tea?
I'm like, what is this voice that she's doing?
Every time she's talked to the waiter, she's like,
I'm like, ma'am.
And so Bose is like,
even when she ordered, even when she ordered Calamar,
she's like, oh my god, is this gluten-free?
Well, I haven't had gluten-free for a long time.
I have to do the gluten-free.
I was like, why are you?
I have to do it.
Right?
I'm like, what is this weird, high-pitched voice you do with the weight staff?
Um, glue-free, what?
I'm gonna get it.
That's true.
funny. So Boz is like, I met a manned at Jennifer Tilly's party, and we see that they bonded
because they both were Balmain, which, you know, Beverly Hills, like, your best friends. So she's
like, yeah. So she seems interesting. She likes Balmain. And she's a businesswoman, and she's getting
married. So I want to get to nowhere more. Tell me everything, girl. I feel like you're really,
like, breezing over, like, how deep that connection was at that party. So let's reenact it.
Who is Jack? Is that, by the way?
This is Belmain.
This is Belmain.
Oh, my God, really?
Yeah.
That was it.
It was like, this is Belmain.
This is Belmain.
We're best.
That counts now.
So then we see Amanda saying that she has a master's in counseling.
So she's telling her about herself.
So she's like, yeah, you know, like I wasn't even in finance at all.
Like, I have a master's in counseling.
And so I decided, like, what can I do?
So I'd made a personal development brand, you know, and I just was putting out really good content every day.
I would like wear different clothes and talk about money.
And so I started as a therapist and a life coach and then a business coach.
And my audience just grew and I wanted to help more people.
So I started making online courses that help people create professional, personal lives of their dreams.
So then I started a digital course called Become a Life Coach.
Oh!
And then I found that I had a gift around money, but I'm not like a financial.
planner. I'm more like it's more around like the energetic part of money, the mindset part,
the psychology around it. When she said the energetic part of money, I was just, I was like this
lady, she is, she is clearly a charlatan, but like, I don't know, she's like a charlatan
I'm really enjoying. She's such a charlatan. And I know that she's going to annoy so many people
that I, she's not the hero I want, but maybe she's the hero I deserve. Yeah. Um,
I'm not sure. The jury is still out for me, but I am enjoying so far.
So Amanda's like, well, yeah. I mean, that's what I became known for. And I have a bestselling
book called Rich as Fuck. Yeah. She goes, oh, yes. Yeah. So I became known as the money
queen. It's like you became known that because you called yourself that in your book.
What are we acting like? It's like writing your own reviews on a movie poster, you know?
Yeah. And Amanda says, yeah, I create courses on all kinds of things. So Dorit walks in,
She goes, oh, my God, so I've been thinking about you a lot.
I just, like, literally manifested you at this launch.
Like, that's crazy that you're here.
I've just been, like, sending you love and good vibes
and, like, every day, just, like, praying that you're getting some sleep.
I just hope, I just worry, you know, like with that crazy nine to five job of yours,
that you're just not getting enough sleep.
Are you doing okay?
How's to love how every time Dorit enters how she compliments Bose,
because it's always so over the top.
She's like, ah, blues, translucent, transcendent,
lucius never seen anything like it are we on the north side of los angeles now so yeah
amanda says like oh dorida i've been praying for you and i hope he gets sleep and drudry's like
that is so sweet my first impression of amanda to be unistam i didn't know what to make
but now hearing she was thinking of me all weekend and prayed for me is
incredibly kind and sweet and curing.
Oh, my God, the calamari's gluten-free.
That never happens.
I literally manifested the gluten to be gone from the calamari today,
and at long last it happened.
Wow, wow.
Couldn't you manifest yourself a system that could handle gluten?
Yes.
How about that?
Just concentrate on the important things in life.
You wouldn't need to be rich if you could.
could have gluten.
I'm just saying that right now.
Mm-hmm.
Well, I'd like to talk about PK now.
What do I say?
My ex-husband, my husband, my Pringle monster, what do I call him?
Estranged.
Yes.
Well, he's very much an alpha male.
But you know that, by the way, he trails around Mauricio every day.
And he's a businessman.
And he built a very big business in the UK.
And when the world tilted on its access of 2008, he lost his business.
So she talks about how they didn't have a pre-up and, but what, I guess when, but when they met, like, he was totally broke.
So we had nothing to even, like, worry about.
Right.
So there was nothing to protect.
So she says they, she's like, oh, P.K. handled all the finances.
I didn't have to do anything.
And we had a business manager.
So there was never a handoff.
There was never an agreement.
I just would find out is not going to pay this anymore.
And they're like, oh, no, you know, they're just looking into each other.
Oh, this lady is so screwed.
Yeah, exactly.
So Amanda's like, so you're living in the family home and he's trying to not pay the mortgage, like, for example.
So he's like randomly has the side of that like you're on your own is like that one's happening.
Well, he's paying the mortgage.
I mean, it's he making X?
No, no, he's not.
And so she says that for the last 14 years,
PK has been paying most of the family's outgoings, but when they separated, he said the finances would stay the same, so she never really did anything about it. But then a month later, she got an email saying he decided he's no longer going to do that. And she's like, why this changed all of a sudden? Derreet, have you never heard of men? This man dumped his family to be with you. What is what in the world made you think that this would be okay? Everybody was telling you last year, protect yourself, protect yourself, protect yourself, protect yourself. Why would you? I
I mean, come on.
And I know this happens a lot.
So I'm not saying like, oh, my God, you stupid women.
It's nothing like that.
It's Doreet specifically.
You knew that you're married to a fucking con man and a loser.
And how are you doing this?
Do you think he's just going to pay for you, whatever you want forever?
Come on, Doreet.
Come on.
Well, for you to have a fair position in mediation, you have to know what you're working with.
Like, do you know about your retirement accounts, anything?
Well, we don't even have one as far as I'm concealed.
I don't know.
Someone who's not invested, nothing.
And I don't know.
I've yet to discover everything.
And I can tell you where I am.
It's a place called the unknown.
Lucretius.
So Beau says that when her husband died,
she had to, you know, raise Lail on her own.
And like, you have to figure out where all the money is
and it's very tricky.
And Amanda is shocked.
Like, how do you turn a blind eye to all this stuff?
I'm like, have you meant to read?
Actually, you haven't.
You've just met her right now.
Well, you'll find out how Doreet can turn a
blind eye very easily, very, very easily. Yeah, so Amanda's like, wow, yeah, you can't do this as a
woman, you know? And Dorit says, um, of what, piquet? He's a very complex person. And by that,
I mean, a complex cob. And he's not a bed guy, not a terrible bad guy. Does he smell like
funnions? Yes. But does he have some bad behavior? Absolutely. And then you throw drinking into the mix,
the occasional cokey, cokey, and then for someone of his character, it gets even more complicated.
And not only that, my name is on everything. So basically, he just saddled her with a bunch of debt
and is now just going to walk away, fucking her over, which pretty much everybody saw coming
years ago, but right, wow, right. So Bose basically turns to Amanda and it's like, well,
well, what can do, Amanda, you're a financial jury. What can we do proactively knowing what these
knowing these unknowns is there anything she can do to protect yourself amanda you have the
floor to be the financial girl you proclaim yourself to be and she's like um here's your test
amanda let's give amanda a test right now and see because you know boz already knows all this stuff
yeah here's some fail safe ways for you to protect yourself first i think you have to decide
what you want what you've been creating and who you're going to be and i know that's like those are
big overarching questions, but I am just put on the spot. So I'm just going to give you some,
you know, classic bullshit and just make it sound very professional. So who do you want to be as a
provider? Who do you want to be as a woman who earns? Who do you want to be as a woman who goes
to Starbucks? Are you a grande person? Are you a Trenti? Are you a venty? What size drink do you like?
Because that's going to inform how much money you're going to save. Think about that. Who are you
going to leave? Pig tails pony tails are a bun. Think about it. Think about it. Think
about that hatchback or sedan okay outer recliner is it a love seat do you like a love seed do you like a
convertible what are you tile or wood mm-hmm yeah um fluorescent or LED what's your vibe tang or battery
acid you have to really think about these things yeah and it sounds like a bunch of bullshit she has
no financial advice here is the financial advice that you need um you need a um a
Financial, what do you call it when the, uh, forensic person goes a forensic accountant and a lawyer. That's what you need. Okay. Lawyer and a forensic account. Duh. Yep. Why is nobody saying that to her? It's making me nuts. And Boas is like, wait a minute. What is this fru, fru mess she's talking about? I was looking for one plus one equals two. You're on the wrong show. That's. What is this calculus? Hello. You're trying to get to read to do math. She doesn't even know what part of town she's in.
What kind of provider does she want to be?
What does that even mean?
That's not financial advice.
The math ain't mathen.
Okay, let me give you some real financial advice.
What sort of badass woman do you want to be?
Because that's the financial advice you need.
There we go.
That's the real shit right there.
Yeah, that's actually what I wanted to hear from Bose because I mean, you know,
Bose is the one that I'm going to assume has it more together in the self-help department
than Amanda does just because I so far like Bose.
but um wow this is scary man yikes poor dree literally yikes yeah yeah so that is the episode we'll see
how it goes yeah it's not gonna it's not gonna be good for d'ri because pk is crafty and i feel like
he's gonna rake it to read over the coals i think it's gonna be bad but he's already set her up for
complete failure by putting everything in her name and then walking off and refusing to pay it so
we not very jacks very jacks on the
I don't know where the next
Bradley Hills episode is, but
this is our last one until the new year.
So thanks everyone for being here.
And we will catch you
next week.
Bye, everyone.
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with Michelle Vivian. I love a ya, Olivia
Williamson. She sure is swell. It's
Raquel. Yes, we can, uh, it's Sedana. Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman. Let's share with Sharon
Eldridge. Darn Skippy, it's Tippy. And our super premium sponsors. Make way for A.J. Lopez.
She's VV.I.P. It's Amanda V. Can't lose when you're with Amy Baldwin. Somebody get us 10 Cs
of Betsy MD. We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva. Let's get real with Caitlin O'Neill.
Put us on a stretcher. It's Charlotte Fletcher. Don't get solaceor. Don't get sol,
with Christine Pepper can't have a meal without the Emily sides who what why where and
Gwen Pentland let's go into the woods with Guy Tubbs nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall
hail the corkmaster the master of the cork Jennifer Corcoran we got our wish it's Jen
Plish my favorite Murdo Karen McMurdo she's a total knockout it's Katie Manaw in the study
with a candlestick it's Leslie Peacock gee it's Lisa H we're ride or die for Lisa Rider Barron
She's a whiz, it's Liz Sarthi.
Always killing it, it's Lola Alkalani.
The Incredible Edible Matthews Sisters.
She eases our woes, it's Melissa St. Rose.
There's a chance of meatballs, it's Rebecca Cloud.
Maximum love for Sandy Maximuska.
She's the Queen B, it's Sarah Lemke.
We cannot tell a lie, it's Sarah Teleth Sun.
Shannon, out of a canon, Anthony.
Please don't stop, it's Soleon Pop.
Let's take off with Temla Plain.
You'll always get the full story with Tori.
Parsons. She ain't no shrinking Violet Coutar. We love you guys.
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