Watch What Crappens - #3167 RHOBH S15E05 Part Two: Vapid Vortex

Episode Date: January 16, 2026

This is part 2 of a 2-part recapThe ladies of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills get more annoyed with Amanda’s bragging on their Sedona trip and then rally to annoy Sutton so her real personality will come out. It’s pretty easy tbh. To watch this recap on video, listen to our bonus episodes, and get ad free listening,, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. Find bonus episodes at patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens and follow us on Instagram @watchwhatcrappens @ronniekaram @benmandelker Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hi everyone, welcome back. This is part two of a two-part recap. If you're wondering where part one was, we'll go check in the feed and be sure to subscribe. So that way you always get your episodes. But enough of that, let's get right back into the episode. So then in a confessional, Kyle says that Sutton has been acting super mysterious about ending things with Avi. And now Kyle's even more curious. Wow, Kyle, I wonder why people ask about your sexuality all the time. I wish they'd stop. Oh, yeah, Kyle, very happy to Brian to other people's lives. Yeah. So Amanda's like, do I say something? And Kyle's like, well, if he's just, if he's saying that, who knows what he's saying to other people, right? I mean, I was like, yeah, then she should probably know.

I should probably like tell her about this in front of the entire cast to make her as uncomfortable as possible. Sounds good. Prima Vera. Prima Vera coming up. That sounds fun. So in the kitchen, people are filtering in. Rachel is like, should we be concerned that it's like late and like no one's here and like we're all cooking. Like this is crazy. I've actually never seen a stovetop being used before. I didn't even know there was fire in them. Like this is crazy. I thought the stove was just like more surface just in a different shape. Wow. Wow.

Well, you know, we got back for the hike late. We went to this really cool grocery store called Clarks. It's an amazing trip. So far I've been taken outside into a grocery store. So send it's really really. killing it with this one. And then the hallow tradition on Beverly Hills is making these women go into a grocery store, which is basically like an amusement park for them. They've basically gone to like great adventure, six flags, you know, Natsbury Farm. They've never, they don't go to grocery stores. They're always so fascinated. And here we have like Erica in the basket and Jennifer being like, wha!

She pushes her along as of like the novelty of a shopping basket and all the food on shelves. Whoa, it's a Wonderland. She almost runs into a lady in the store. She goes, oh, a local person. Sorry, vocal person. They're used to these kind of high intensity adrenaline thrills, but perhaps it's new. Sorry, local person. We are celebrities.

They're like they can't believe there's some sort of thing called a quote unquote Kurt, that's so big enough that a human can be put inside and be pushed around. It's like a roller coaster, but you do it yourself. So now it's 10 p.m. and Rachel and Kathy are still cooking. How long does it take to make pasta primavera? So, um, treat's like, sorry, it's late. Have it on my veranda. And they're like, oh wow.

Rachel goes, I would have done that if I had a veranda. I don't have one. So I've been pounding chicken instead. I might as well be pounding my soul. I'm dead. Literally better. Does anyone know if this chicken moisturized before we cooked it? I just really want to know.

It's really important to me. Now it's 1049. Oh my God. So Kyle comes and it's like, guys, it's almost 11 o'clock. It smells so good. We need a cheese plate to save off some of the hunger. I'm having some monster cheese on a chocolate donut right now. Anybody?

Anybody? No? Okay. Suit yourselves. Sounds fucking delicious to me, honestly. So Erica's like, We're all watching our calories. There's no swimming pools in Sedona.

Erica's like, where's the house is in this fucking place? Amanda goes, well, I'm just like, I'm like so confused by the timing of this group. And I say this is someone who has a Chanel watch. Because like, when am I supposed to actually be somewhere? Like, where is Sutton? She said she's going to be cooking the chicken. Like, if there was an option not to come,

I would have liked to have known I could have gone to bed early. So the issue here really is that they are all cooking very slowly. And pasta primavera. I've actually never made pasta primavera, but from what I know about it, it's like one of the easier pastas to make. It's just like vegetables tossed with pasta. And Sutton, though, is making the main course.

She's making the chicken. And they all, Sudden's nowhere to be found. And chicken doesn't just get made in three seconds. So they're all waiting around because none of them actually know how to cook chicken, I think. I think we see Rachel pouting a chicken. Yeah, I think Rachel took over the, chicken a long time ago. She's like, I'll just make the chicken. I'm going to do it how Kai

Kai Kai likes it. Yeah, moisturized and flat. Yeah. Kai, Kai, look at me. I'm making a chicken. I'm pounding it. Is this how your dad does it? God, your dad hates you. What's your dad trying to give you some and Ella? I'm doing it better. Tell your dad. Tell your dad's girlfriend. I make the best chicken. I'm like so sad that I mentally somehow did not see Rachel pounding the chicken because that's a visual that I think is very special. I cannot imagine Rachel ever picking up anything like a mallet and using it. Yeah, she was pounding the chicken and her hair was like hanging all down over the chicken. She's like, guys, I'm pounding chicken.

But I just kept thinking, God, there's so much. It's going to be like so much hair in that chicken, hairy chicken. 1105, Sutton arrives. Amanda's not wrong, totally. And it's not out of the ordinary to get annoyed that people are late to things on trips. But this is a house thing and it's not that. And no one eats. And also, Amanda, you're so.

new. Like, just be quiet. Just be grateful to be here. You know what I mean? Why don't you cook some chicken? How about you manifest Sutton? Okay. Yeah. You can manifest millions of dollars, but you can't call DoorDash. Is there also a way to manifest you going up to Sutton's door and knocking on and saying, hey, when are you going to come down to cook the chicken or should we take that over? Because we're all starting to cook right now. Like, there's ways to handle this. That's true, but none of them do. They're all afraid of Sutton right now because everyone knows they're slowly poking at Sutton and they're going to make her explode and Sutton's obviously going through something crazy. And so they're just like the rest of the like Kyle's timing it. You know, she's like, oh, here we go.

Can't wait. But Amanda is just like, I'm supposed to have a scene with Sutton and now I have to sit here and wait for her. Now I'm adding chicken to my list of grievances with Sutton. So now it's 1105. Sutton finally comes down. And they're like, where have you been? And she's like, I'm just slow, guys.

It's me. Easy, breezy, set in Brown. Okay. when we all know the sudden has been up on her phone and her computer calling every lawyer that she knows to go after Avi. Like, get that NDA. Can we get a post-birth NDA? Get it now. Get it now.

I feel like she's been sitting up in a room looking herself in the mirror with curlers in her hair and like a glass of, glass of Tito's just staring at herself and drinking it or her hands shaking. Like, they're not going to get you to that. Come on, you can do this. And you can do this. Come on. Putting lipstick on shakily. Yeah. Gonna be it.

You, Sutton Brown. Wiping it off. She doesn't not get bothered. I'll be ready to know. The power of the vortex is with me. Where have you been? And why's that lipstick all over your face? This is Sutton Brown.

Sutton Brown is calm. She is fine. Okay, then. Three cup chicken, three cup chicken. That's one cup, one cup flour, three cup chicken. Like, Sutton, are you okay? Yes. After the hike, I just needed a little time to myself so I could re-center and enjoy it the evening.

And frankly, who cares if I'm late? We're on some sort of a time clock here. It's vacation. It's just me. Sutton Brown loves lateness now. Loves lateness. Ma'am, you better reach into that vortex and pull out a rotissory tree. chicken very quickly because everyone is hungry and you're on chicken duty. This is not right. If you were on

chicken duty, you should be one of the first people in that kitchen and you should be doing all the things. And I'm actually mad at Sutton about this. Okay. I'm a Sutton fan, but I am not a fan of being the last one there to do the chicken work. But here's the thing. Now Sutton goes and pounds the chicken. So that was the pounding of the chicken? So was it in my head that I saw, Rachel? This is the thing that makes me crazy about myself and why I think I need help. Literally, I see the visual in my head of Rachel pounding a chicken with her hair hanging down over it. So where did that come from? Am I just like, if these shows turned me into a delusional, crazy person?

Yes. And on top of that, well, all of us are delusional and crazy. But I think that what it is is that on the other side of the vortex in the parallel universe, Rachel is pounding the chicken. But in this universe, Sutton's pounding the chicken. And at this point, the vortices have combined. and we can't we can't tell things are coming out of the matrix and we're like it's we're seeing everything and and but in both sides in both sides jennifer's like well i did take the lid off of

the guacamole so my work here is done there is always someone who does that during our cooking party someone always makes that joke like they took the lid off of something my work here is done that can says cooking does it not i saw giant papa be today charm yeah that goes that goes that up there in the halls of great ones. Like when someone comes to clear your plate and it's empty and you go, whoa, really like that one. Really hated it. Practically lit the plane, huh? Hated it.

I'd like to complain to the chef. Really hated this meal. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappence commercial. Anyway, pizza boxes. Dorit has pizza boxes. Just say the word. I'll use them.

I'll use them. For dinner? No, it's evidence against PK. He's stuck so many he's in the refrigerator. None of us can have any other helpful snacks. So Kyle's trying to figure out how propane grills work. And that's fun. Kyle can't even open up her French door.

Who put her in charge of the carous? Not the kerosene. The propane. That's ridiculous. So she's doing that. And then meanwhile, Kathy's walking around the kitchen with the dishrag stuck to the bottom of her shoe. She's like, Who's looking for you, Tennessee?

And they're looking at each other like, why are we trusting other housewives to feed us? We're all going to die here. So back on the patio, it's time to get back down to the more important business, which is giving an arena for Amanda to brag about something. So Jennifer is looking at Kyle's shoes. And she's like, I'm obsessed with the Chanel Birkenstocks. They would become so good with that Chanel purse that you have. And Amanda's like, oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

iconic, like anything Python and Snake Skin. Yeah, I have a lot of those, a lot of Chanel Birkenstocks, like so many. Like, sometimes Birkenstock is like, we should just call you the stock because you have our stockpile of Birkenstocks. I just have so many. Oh, you have both. You have so many things. Okay. Okay. Yeah, Sutton. So anyway, now that everyone's gathered around, you know, something odd did happen, and I didn't know if I should tell you, but like I talked to Kyle about it. Oh, you talked to Kyle about it. Okay. Well, what is it? Just me. Sett and Brown, calm, setting around. What is it? Go ahead. You can say anything to me.

Sister. Well, she encouraged me to tell you. So you had an assistant named Avi R. Something. Avi? Avie. The exact same thing. Fucking Amanda. Yeah, the exact same line. Was your assistant's name? Was it Chanel Backpack? No, I'm sorry. That's just what I was wearing earlier today. Okay. Anyway, so a good friend of mine was out. And he says, didn't she say that her friend who was out before was some girl named Alana, but now it's some guy? No, the he is Avi. Avi says, tell Amanda to call me.

Oh, God. Well, I failed. This is why I never solved mysteries. God, him the worst. Oh, no, you're not. It's a confusing show with a lot of really exciting things happening all at once. So you're getting overwhelmed. There's just so much going on.

They're pounding a chicken. So she's like, so I obviously did not call him and get the dirt on you. And then apparently he said, tell Amanda to hire me as her assistant. And that will really piss something off. So, and she's like, well, you should hire him. That wouldn't piss me off at all. I'd be totally fine with it. I am totally fine.

I am just cool as a cucumber, which I will not slas because I'm on chicken duty. Okay. Just go ahead and hire him. I mean, at the very least, that would get me off of unemployment duty. So go for it. Amanda's like, well, I mean, like, I have a full team I'm very happy with, so I don't want to hire him. But it seemed like he was trying to like start something by talking about you, like stir something up about you. Are you mad now?

I was like, yeah, I mean, like, it's weird thing we didn't even say that, right? Sutton, right? Are you mad, Sutton? You want to talk about it, Sutton? You want to share about it, Sudden? Okay, like, let's ask some more questions about Avi. Okay, everyone. So then Jennifer is saying, well, when I heard that Sutton and Avi had parted way,

I thought it was temporary, and I thought a few weeks later, I'd come by, and there would be Avi saying, oh, Jennifer, can I make you a drink? And I actually talked to Avi, and he sort of thought that would be the temporary thing, too. And he wasn't quite sure when it happened. So if he wasn't quite sure what happened, maybe it is what Sutton said that she just didn't need an assistant anymore. You know, I wonder if it was like this knock-down, drag-out thing, or if she was just like, listen, my kids are all gone, and I'm not going to be getting $300,000 a month anymore. So, you know, or will she still? You know what? Someone, forget all the questions about Avi.

Like at the end of the day, it's like, Avi was nice and everything, but he's the help. Like, who cares? Like, asked Sutton, like, why she got rid of Avi? Is she going to, like, get less than $300 grand a month? Because I'll feel so bad for her. It's, like, really hard to live on $300 grand a month as it is. But is that alimony or is that alimony plus child support?

Like, what's happening? What's happening? Can I still borrow $100? This will be the next step. We'll be Kyle saying, like, well, maybe she's, like, not getting a lot of money. Maybe she's, like, running out of money. Maybe she can't even afford to live on the main street anymore. Maybe we should get her a box so she can move into it.

I don't know. Guys, I'm just thinking out. Yeah. Erica, is the cannibals place, is the cannibals place open down the street from Erica? Kyle, who won't even, last season, wouldn't let people even mention the name Morgan Wade, told them all off camera, you're not allowed to mention her name. And here she is happy to instigate prying into the situation. situation with Avi, which Sutton is clearly uncomfortable about, and also trying to

dig into what P.K. is saying. It's just, it's so Kyle Richards. Yeah. So Amanda's like, yeah, I mean, like, you think I shouldn't have told you? Because, like, if somebody worked for me, was saying that about me, I'd want to know. Okay, well, I'm glad you told me. So thank you. But if you didn't tell me or you did tell me, I wouldn't really care. So the bridge has been burned. Yeah, bridge has been burned. Okay, well, you know what? It just doesn't really affect me. I don't care about bridges. If the bridge is burned, I fly over it in a helicopter. Okay, I don't care. I do. I do don't care. Avi who? What? Ari, Avi, Avi? Adi? I don't know. Aldi. It's a good line. It's a good line. She did a good job with that, I'll say. So Amanda's like, it's just an uncomfortable thing to bring up, but like a necessary thing to bring up. It was the right thing to do. And all I can do is what I think is right. I'm like, if it was the right thing to do, you would have said, just so you know, your old assistant's talking.

shit about you because you talked to my friend but instead you're like hey this is kind of uncomfortable but your assistant said this about you do you want to get mad right now like she didn't say it like a girl like I think like a girlfriend or just a friend in general would be like just so you know this person was talking to you to my friend like that yeah a friend would take you pull you aside first of all and be like um listen this is what I heard you should probably know not wait not go to Kyle first and then go to everybody else and then keep going and going and going and going. It's like she said she doesn't care. And you're like, you don't care.

Seriously? Like, because maybe he was trying to hurt your feelings. I don't know. I mean, I don't know him, but it seemed like he was trying to hurt your feeling. I don't care. Really?

Because God, he sure hates you. He has a bumper sticker on his car that said, fuck sudden strike. Well, that's not even my name anymore. Yeah. He hates your guts.

When he was ordering. a drink, he said, I'll have a Tito's martini up. If I was like, my old boss, I'd have it in a bathtub and drink it all in one go. My right one, what a drunk bitch. He said that about you. I do not care. I don't care. Don't care.

I don't care. Are you sure? Because he really hates you. I don't care. But he hates you. Like hates. Hits so much. Have you ever tried to get a kid to eat Brussels sprouts?

That's what his face looked like when he was talking about. Hate you. So wants you dead. Want you dead. Have you ever tricked a kid by putting Brussels sprouts in their Chanel backpack? And then they get to school and they're like, oh my God, there's Brussels sprouts in my Chanel backpack. That's how you.

But then they poop out double seas and you're like, was it worth it now? Yeah. Anyway, that was the story about my kids, but Avi really hates you. So then the other people join, the whole group, everyone else joins. And she's like, so what are we doing? And Jennifer, I just made her sound like Tia. But then Jennifer's like saying that they're talking about Avi and stuff and and Amanda tells the whole situation again and Bose is like well why would

Avi want to say that? I don't think that he would. Oh like so you don't believe that he said that. So I goes, okay, I got to tell y'all I don't like talking about this. I'm uncomfortable talking about all this. Avi and I, we had a friendship. But at the end of the day, you get nothing for nothing, which is how I describe his professional attitude. Nothing for nothing. It was a professional relationship and that is it. Well, the dynamic between Sutton and Avi Avi was very funny. They were like the odds couple. They had a very good relationship until they didn't.

You know what happens? I don't know. Nothing good, that's for sure. And Sutton's like, well, I think we should talk about sitting at the dinner table. Why don't we talk about that instead of talking about Avi, who I don't care about because he was an employee. So why don't we do that? Okay.

Do you just see Sutton like, I'm not going to yell. at these bitches today. They will not get me today, Reba. They will not get me today. So now it's like after midnight and Doreet and Sutton are they're in the kitchen. I don't know if I've even

eaten dinner yet. I don't think they have. But they're in the kitchen. And Doreet is like, well, I think what's important to me in life is it's important to grow, which is something that P.K. has done quite a bit over the course of our marriage. Unfortunately, Sun's like, yeah, I had to show.

shift because I was going in a direction I didn't like. So I talked to my mom. And the moment that I reached out to my mother, I said, this is a terrible direction for me to be going in my life. Why am I even speaking to my mother anymore? So I made a shift. Talk to my mom. And I say, can I talk to you? It's a patient.

And three goes, ooh, ooh, ooh, good for you. Like, it's like, you talk to your mother. You talk to Riba for help. Like, you're helpless, you know. And so Sutton tells us, yeah, you know, I was talking to my mom. mom about my anger and she thinks that I'm taking my anger about my divorce out on other people. And so, you know, she said what might help her is to get her a bigger guest house. So I just let her move into the main house.

So she's a good therapist. Very good therapist. Wow. She really, well, Reba really probably had to do some deep digging to come up with that prognosis, right? Like, I feel like Sutton goes to Starbucks and it's like, I'd like to order a cold brew, please. They're like, okay. And then when they serve it up, they're like, okay, this is for the woman who's angry about a divorce

and projected onto her friends very obviously. Thank you. My mom gave me a very good piece of advice. She said, you bring fruitcake home, you leave it open on the table, and then you wonder why there are flies. And that really hit home. That really hit home.

Well, look, it's not been our experience in our household, unfortunately while Piquet was living there. If there were flies, they were in Piqui's stomach. No one caught flies better than Piqui. You catch more flies with honey? No, you catch more flies with Piquet with a fruit cake in his stomach. That's the way you catch them. One thing I'll say about PK, we never had a cleaner kitchen.

Those counters were spotless. Before we even had a dog, we never had a crumb on the floor. Fournines got nothing on PK's saliva. He just licked it up. So she goes, well, certain, room was not built in a day. But it was burnt down to the ground in a week. It's always my answer to that. Room wasn't built in a day.

Didn't take long to burn it, though, did it? It's okay. You know what? I did it to myself, and that's okay. I am stronger and better for it's all my fault. Well, maybe 5% Avi's fault, but it's all my fault. Okay, 5% Avi, 5% of my ex. Okay.

Oh, well, you know, maybe 25% of, 25% my ex. You know what? Well, let's just say 50% obvious, 50% my ex. X. Okay. Anyway, this is a great meal, huh? Here's what I learned. You can't trust the gay ones either. So I learned things. I learned things. You know, in the past, I was really worried about what people thought of me and what they were saying about me. And it really, it just encompassed my brain. And I would think, oh gosh, you know, am I pretty enough? Am I smart enough? But now I've just put those thoughts aside. And I focus on what I need to focus on, which is being a good friend and a good person to myself.

ugly old me who no one wants to sit with it lunch did i just say that that loud i did not say i'm calling my mother i'm calling my mother right now you know it is such a blessing because i spent so much time in the past being worried what other people thought of me but now i've been accepted into this group so i don't have to worry what other people think about me even though by me being happy that i'm in this group it implicitly says i'm worried about what people think about me anyway let's go back to the table i think that there's a war starting to come down between me and so on. And for the first time, it feels genuine, real deep. Mr. Gorbachev, please take down this wall between me and Sutton. And if that involves P.K.

crashing through it like the Kool-Aid man, so be it. Wouldn't be the first time, Mr. Gobi Chutes. You're like a wrecking ball. Guys, it is now 12. You are like a wrecking bull. Um, it is 12.48 a.m. by the time they get their dinner. 1248 a.m. for pasta and chicken. Anyone who's, anyone who has come over to my place while I cook dinner knows that I sometimes have an issue with time management that, you know, that is something I work on and I struggle with. But this is late even for me. Like, I've definitely had dinners where I'm like, okay, this will be on the, on the, on the table at like 9.30. And it's literally like 10.4.000. 45 or 11. Yeah, but you serve 10 courses.

You're like, okay, and then here's the appetizers and here's the chicken, here's the pasta, here's the dessert, and here's the thing. You know, it's like a whole circus of food. So if I have to wait an extra half an hour, it's worth it. It's made up in the caloric, you know, wind that I get. And I play good music. I play good music while people wait. But the problem is that in this case, they're waiting until 1 a.m.

to have pasta prima vera and there's probably some on-season chicken breasts. Let's be honest. They didn't even get to listen to Lilith, Fair. while they did it. The best soundtrack to any cooking experience. Hey there. You know me. Oh, me,

lately. Is that the Lillith version of Carly Ray Jepson? No, I just know that Carly Ray is also playing during dinner. Yeah, no, I play a lot of I'm doing your dinner. I'm doing your dinner playlist. My dinner playlist is actually quite amazing,

but there's, I don't put on a lot of Carly Ray Jepson because, you know, not Dom's favorite singer and I try to, if I'm playing music in the public spaces I'm trying to make music that everyone's going to enjoy. That's usually when I'm cooking dinner for myself. I put on a Carly Rae Jipson playlist.

But there'll be some Tina Turner, there'll be some chaday, there'll be some Janet, there'll be some Mariah. You know, the greatest hits of the 80s, 90s, and today. Yeah. Commercials, here comes one right now. So Kathy's like,

okay, everybody, this is what you call potlock. And Bose goes, that took 17 hours to me. No, because like, I don't know about the luck part of it. But I can use some pot. So now it's the next day. Nothing happens at dinner. Like, they couldn't even have a dinner fight because it was so late. They were like, fuck it.

We tried with Amanda. It didn't work. Sutton still hasn't had a breakdown. We'll try tomorrow in brighter lighting. Yeah, seriously. So the next day and Amanda meets Erica in the kitchen. Amanda's like, you look cute for someone who's not wearing a Chanel. backpack. I mean, I love your space buns. Are they still called that? Because I always

call them the Chanel space buns. You just don't have that brand on you. Okay, that's fine. Yeah. So Amanda's like, oh my God, my team just told me our new website is up. So that's kind of exciting for me. Wow. Yeah. And she goes, yeah, by the way, I think Sutton's mad at me, you guys. Of course she is. But she came up to me this morning and she was like, hey, Missy, I heard you were talking about me being late last night. And so we see Sutton confronting Amanda, I'm like, so, Missy, I heard you were complaining last night about me being late. Jennifer heard it. Kyle heard it.

Everyone heard it. You mad? I'm sorry. I'm still laughing that Amanda decided to announce that her web, their new website is up. She's so. Guys, great news. Our payment to Wix went through. The site's up.

That's right. Sign up to shop. Bosh. Bisch.com just got privacy on its domain for another year. Can you believe it? Guys, celebrate my win. Celebrate my wins. We're using this very exclusive platform called WordPress,

and we've just been told our contract's been renewed. So we see a flashback. Laura, I'm I'm right, guys. Now, what the hell is wrong with these producers? We have this amazing scene of Sutton pulling out Missy, which, you know, if you're saying Missy, you're not a happy person. And Sutton's like, so Missy, I heard you were complaining.

You said the line already. And like, why is this being relegated into a flashback when nothing else is happening? Why can't we let, why can't we like enjoy the, like, let the scene breathe of Amanda walking puttering around getting breakfast and Sutton going, by the way, Missy, you were complaint, I heard you were complaining last night about me being late. Jennifer heard it, Kyle heard it, the cactus heard it, everyone heard it, everyone on the other side, the vortex heard it.

And you think you're getting one over me. Well, let me tell you something, Missy, you don't know, Sutton Brown. You may think you know Sutton's track, but you do not know something right. Like, I want one of those moments and they just put it in a flashback. That's not right. and says, excuse me, I don't care. I don't need excuses. We're here in the vortex.

So what do you say? It's a moment. Okay? It's a moment. And so Amanda's like, yeah. And then she was like taking it out on me that I brought up the assistant thing probably. And that like hurt my soul a little bit, you know, like, because she's like totally taking it out on me. Like, you knew what you were doing.

And she's not, trust me, this is nothing for a sudden. And I like when Sutton's later, she says later, yeah, trust me, you'd know when I'm mad. You'd know. That was nothing. You got a missy. That was called charity. Okay. Yeah, you got a missy.

Erica's like, well, it'll hurt less and less as the days go by. You'll just sort of see her as a gnaering old woman, and you'll have fun with it. Enjoy. So then Amanda's like, hey, Rachel, how'd you sleep? Terrible. I got like three hours of sleep. Kathy was like walking around upstairs the entire time. I was like, I die.

I die. I die. I die, I die, I die, I die. I die, I die. You guys, like, you know what my ideal, my ideal vacation is, like, sitting by a pool. dress like a queen bed, a queen-sized bed. That's what I want to do. Just cover me in a sheet and throw me under the sun and an umbrella.

That's like literally all I want to do. Calfton all day, every day. In fact, I almost know if Caius was a girl, I was going to name her Cafftan. But, God, Cajas is Cajan. Kai Caj and Calfe. That was my dream. Kai Kai and Caff Caff. But unfortunately, we got a little fucking easy bike rider.

What do you call it, E-bike rider? Yeah. whatever. Yeah. When I saw that, when I saw that my other son, when I saw that Sky had joined a biker gang, I was horrified. There was like eight of those, him, those bikes coming down the road. And then I was looking him through the kaleidoscope. That made me so much happier, just one of them.

Just one of them. I was like, how is he biking on the road upside down? And I saw. He wasn't. It's like that's so dangerous, Sky, Sky. Oh, my God. I take it back. I love that Rachel Zos on this cast because I love to, I love making fun of her.

So back in the kitchen, Amanda's like, oh my God, you guys, my sleep score today is worse than yesterday. I got a 61. Yesterday I had a 69. Shut the fuck up. Why are this person on this cast? No one should be allowed on a cast of Housewives that talks about sleep scores. I don't want to hear about it. I don't even know what it is.

I'm going to assume I connect the dots. It's something with your app. You put your phone on the mattress or something. And it's like, how old did you sleep? Or you're like, maybe she has one of those tracking rings or whatever. Yeah, but like, um. Yeah, no one in this group is going to care about the sleep score at all. And it's just not going to come up on your Nouveau ring or whatever that Bueller got up at three in the morning,

walked straight up to my head and stared at me until I woke up right in my eyes. You know, it's like it looks like it's my fault for waking up all the time, not because my dog needs to shift position every two hours. And who does that? And how do I even wake up? Like, he gets up and he, like, I feel him walk right up to me. And then he walks right up to my face. And he's just like, are you going to lift the blanket?

Or am I just supposed to find my own comfort? It's three in the morning, bro. You can figure this out by now. You're 14. What are you? A matchbox 20 song? It's 3 a.m. Come on.

So Rachel is like, she's like, yeah, I never like track sleep or my mood. I never do that. And then Erica comes in with a sitcom line. She goes, I know somebody who did it and had to quit doing it because it was so depressing. I was like, I kind of like that. I felt like there should have been like a little bit of a laugh track there on that. That was like a full-on 1988 sitcom line. I felt like that's the sort of thing where Dorothy is born out would get like a slow burn look like Erica.

He quiet. Yeah, I'm manifesting, right? My really good friend is a life coach. And she said, you know, like she's had me right down. Like if I could manifest the next man in my life, like what would it be? And I was like, anyone who can give me a Kafka? White wine, cap tan, by the pool all day, every day with Kaias, moisturizer. Amanda's like, oh my God, I made a list for my future ideal husband when I was 13, and I wrote

Abercrombie model. And then years later on a date, Eddie was like, did I ever tell you I was the guy who stood outside Abercrombie with my shirt off? I guess what I'm trying to say is I kind of have a hot husband. Do you guys have hot husbands? No. Oh, that's funny. Shut up.

Yeah, like he's every single thing besides one. I make him in a month What he makes me or so like I'm the breadwinner And so he's like poor But he's hot He's like a toy You know they're all like Why would anyone want to win bread

That's carbs She's so gross Like who's like that About who says that Who says that? It's like Ugh Is she trying to like

Build her brand Is she gonna say Like this is her way of like She wants to like Lead with her wealth So that way more people do her seminars I don't know This is this is actually

just obnoxious. Okay, it's not just annoying the other women, but it is really just probably annoying the rest of the audience, too, at this point. Yeah, so Erica is like, well, I wish I was the fucking breadwinner. Maybe my marriage wouldn't have vended up differently. Oh, okay, okay, Eric.

Yeah, Erica still would have married Thomas. She was the breadwinner. If Erica was really rich, she would have been like, you know what, I really need my life? An 80-year-old man with his balls dragging on the ground who yells at me to be quiet during dinners. fun fun story

Tom once took off his shirt outside of Abercrombie but it didn't end so well for him he was putting the mall jail

you know that's the thing so now they all back to the kitchen Rachel FaceTime's with Kaias hey guys is on the phone he's on the phone

guys he's just moisturized say how to Kaias guys how to Kaias Kaias just got his first Botox we're so proud

So back in the kitchen, no, now we go to the lobby and everyone's getting the cars. They're talking about how they want to go shopping. And Erica and Rachel and Amanda ride together. And Amanda's pretending to take business calls the whole time. She's like, hi. I just wanted to make sure that emails were sent because that's super important. By the way, plan a huge party. I want the whole block out.

We got a domain name privacy put on our website. That would be great. Guys, did you know that G and H are close together on the keyboard? Let's have a meeting about it. Pi chart, pie chart. Yeah, when I looked at my message previews, I thought I saw something about a website. So I was told my friend Erica and I was like, oh, I think my website is done. But like, as it turns out, it's not done.

Is the security stuff to get up there? Okay, because I couldn't find anything. So I think I dreamed the whole thing. Like, maybe my website isn't done? Isn't that crazy? But if it is done, I guess the dream then counts as manifestation. Isn't that crazy, guys? Wow.

This is what we need the real housewives of New York, because when they did Ultimate Girls trip with the New York ladies and Kelly Ben Simone did the same thing, taking business calls in their proximity, they all jumped down our throat. Like, what, you think you're the only one who has business to take care of?

How can't cabaret? Take the calls inside. Girls, don't stand in front of us. We've all got business calls. I don't want to hear your shit, quite honestly. I'm not on a business trip. Save it for your little boy. trying to relax out here.

I don't care. I don't care. She is really hateable, this Amanda girl. Like, everybody hates her. And I think that they're trying to like her, but she's just so gross. So now they go shopping in this little shopping village. And Jennifer's like, well, when you're shopping in Sedona, there's a very specific thing that you want to buy. And that's usually turquoise and cowboy hats.

And there she is. And Kyle comes out, like, just draped in everything turquoise. I know. And guess what, everyone? In case you missed the past seven years of the show, Kyle wants to tell you about her very tremendous and compelling backstory. Since I was a little girl, I've always loved cowboy hats and Native American jewelry and cowboy boots and belts and silver and turquoise.

And my mom loved that too. And like, I'm obsessed with that stuff. So, like, who could say they bought a beautiful brown suede cowboy hat at a gas station? I can. I love the shop and I love hats, okay? All right. Someone play the Amy Grant song. Hats!

What I got to do for all these hats on my head? Hats. Am I right guys? Hats. They're so good. Hats now and forever. Yeah. So they just basically go shopping and spend a shit ton of money on things that are crazy. Like, Hyle pays like a few thousand dollars for turquoise earrings, which is nuts. I'm sorry. As someone from the Southwest, you're overpaying, okay? And Rachel buys the Nick Cardigan for $2,200, just crazy. So it's a lot. It's a rip off town, I'm telling you. So then Jennifer. They wind up in a coffee shop. Oh, sorry. Yeah, they go to the coffee. Yeah, let's just get, it's like we're going on two hours again for this show.

Why? Why is this needed? Why do we do this to ourselves? It's like waiting for Godot. When is it going to happen? The entertainment. So then we're in a coffee shop and Rachel and Amanda are at the counter. And Amanda's like, so question about your macha.

Is your macha good? Is it ceremonial grade? Can I have an iced macho latte? And can you do like half almond and half oat milk? And the lady's like, so I have almond and I have whole milk. like no oat milk. I mean, I was like, oh, okay. And so Rachel's like,

she goes, we're starting over. She goes, we have to start over now. Rachel's live on the edge, do almond. Which is, that's, that's like a diss from in rituals. Like, that's like, that's Rachel being like, stop being such a fucking cut fitness about this and do all almond. That doesn't make a difference. Live on the edge.

She's like ceremonial matcha. What does that mean? Like, it's blessed. Like, I can't. Okay. Like, I can't. I officially can't. Like, this is like, this is what pushes Rachel over the edge with this girl.

She's like, I'm officially done with this idiot. Yeah. By the way, ceremonial macha is a high quality, finely ground green tea powder from Japan, made from the youngest, most tender tea leaves, stone ground for a smooth texture, vibrant color, and complex, sweet, umami flavor traditionally used for Japanese tea ceremonies for pure whisked with water consumption, though some brands market it for latte as well, Others note the term lax strict definition, but generally implies premium first harvest quality for delicate sipping over mixing and is rarely found in Sedona, Arizona. I love the demand.

It's like, I can't just have matcha. I want baby matcha. Okay? It's like the veal of matcha. Get me that. Ceremonial match. I cannot. And she will not do the other half.

She won't do all almond milk. It has to be almond and oat. there's no oat, then like we're just not even bothering. Can we just settle for any kind of C word macha? Okay, coming right up. So now inside the van, Boz Amanda and Dorit are together. And Bose is taking pictures. And Amanda's like, oh, my God, if you clean your screen and you go cinematic, you might get more detail.

I'm just saying. That's why I make the big bucks. I own businesses. So I can manifest more detail. I was like, no, I like the haze. And you know, secretly Bose is like, damn it. Damn it, I want to do this. but I'm not going to let this lady tell me what to do with my pictures.

Finger grease it is. So they show up at this place called the Mesa Grill and it's at the airport, but it's not one of those, like, it doesn't appear to be one of those, like, really chic restaurants that has, like, by an airport, like, it's, like, ironic, like the TWA hotel that's at JFK, it's like, ooh, it's at the airport, but it's actually very trendy because it's like TWA and throwback. problem. It's just a, it's just, it's just, it's just an restaurant at the airport. Yeah. And they get there and they're looking around because it's really bright overhead lighting and just kind of like, you know, normal people in like,

you know, Guy Fietti sunglasses eating with their mouths open. And they're looking around like, what the hell? Like, wow, overhead lighting? What the fuck? If Sutton is trying to introduce us to Sutton Brown, I mean, it's hot, we had to cook, we're eating at the airport. Let's go back to Sutton's track.

That was much more glamorous. She was a bit, but she was a glamorous bitch. Yeah, seriously. So Sun's like, well, the reason we are eating here is because the airport has the most beautiful views. And a lot of people like restaurants at airports. And the producers like, no, they don't. Who? Yeah.

Flat attendance. Look, I figure if we're close to the airport, we can just sort of fantasize about getting on a plane and leaving this wretched place. And we see the view. It's the same view that's everywhere in Sedon. but now this one has jet fuel coming into your face. Like, this is the worst trip. This is one of the worst trips Beverly Hills has ever taken. It's sad.

So Amanda's being quiet and pouty. So Kyle asks her what's wrong. And then the ladies do it cheers. And Amanda's like, oh, by the way, hey Sutton, I feel like you were mad at me this morning, like with the whole, hey, missy thing. And she goes, oh, now, you look, you'll know when I'm mad at you. You'll know.

Okay. You'll know. Yeah. Hey, Missy is not it. That's just kind of like a little amuse-boosh. That's saying, I could be mad at you, and I'm not just there yet. That's kind of like putting the key in the ignition, but you haven't pressed the gas just yet. Yeah, but like, hey, Missy, I heard you were talking about me is a bit of a strong statement.

You were talking about her. So what's your problem? And she goes, yeah, but that's not mad. That is agitated. That's just agitated. So Kathy's like, what happened? So, well, I guess that last night I was late to cook the chicken. And Amanda's like, well, and a lot of people were late, but it was just like, what time is it?

Who's cooking what? She's like, but it was specific to me. She was, well, I mean, it's the main dish, but it wasn't just you, but it was the main dish. Yeah. It wasn't the main dish. Have dairy. It was pasta prima friday or not. Catherine, you're going to take this?

Are you going to take this? It's like, yeah, but it's the protein. Oh, okay. Well, this seems rather trite and juvenile to me that we're talking about me being on time. I don't know. That's just. me. So you weren't agitated about the thing with your assistant who hates you, who told my friend

he hates you, hate you, hate you, like seriously hates you. She goes, no, I'm not mad about it. And Erica's like, I don't want to hear about Avi. We're already at the airport. How much worse could it get? Jeez. You want to talk about my cleaning lady? She didn't take out the lint.

Well, to me, it just felt like we were good and everyone was happy and we were dealing with the chicken and the grill and everything. But I felt like when I brought up your assistant, it just felt like a different energy. When I brought up someone from your past that you may have had issues with, it's just weird how you weren't happy when I did that. I don't know. To hear that, it was sort of jarring? Was it jarring? Well, was it terrible?

Because he hates you. Like, did it rip your soul apart? Like, that guy really, really hate you. Oh, it hates. Sutton tells us, I don't think Amanda is stupid. She knows exactly what she is doing. and don't use me to get attention. Messer.

Man, look, I don't know the facts, and I'm not really interested in learning the facts. Well, yeah, he shouldn't have done that. Okay, first of all, because to me, if he's doing that to you, he's going to do it to the next person. You, I'm not talking about it, Rachel. And Rachel's like, okay, okay, noted.

Jeez, no dead. That's it, and I am not talking about it again. You may talk amongst yourselves, although I will get mad about you if I find out you're talking about me, but I'm telling you, talk about it amongst yourselves, but don't let me find out, and do not include me in conversations about him. Is that clear? So they all look back, like, crazy.

And then Kyle, of all people, Kyle goes, okay, like she tells us, we heard you loud and clear. Sutton, Strack, as if Kyle did not have the same monologue to all the women about Morgan Wade before last season. Yeah, but Sutton really is something else, man. They get under Sutton's skin and she just can't keep it in. It's so funny. She's trying so hard to be like, look at me. I'm a new person. I don't drink vodka until past 11 a.m.

I mean, I'm just basically clean. I don't have any problems with anybody. I'm changing my last name. Everybody likes me now. I'm not insecure. And it's like two seconds later, don't question me again. Yay, Sutton. So she's like, he's just one of the many people that I've lost and I need to focus on the future.

Sutton, look, all right. Look, everybody here isn't in a better place with you than we've ever been. Don't let this drag you into a bad place. You know what I mean? Because the intention was like, it wasn't bad. It just comes across his gossipy. That's all. Who cares?

No one gives a fun. All right. And Eric says, rightly so, that Amanda was not bringing up this information to be like, hey, heads up. She was bringing it up to be like, I know something about you, just so you know. I know things. So then Kyle goes up to Sutton to pretend to console her. She goes, are you okay? Are you okay?

Are you okay? And she's like, do I look okay? No, it's kind of funny, actually. Do you mind if I laugh? Please do not laugh in my face, okay? Just don't do it. And then Jennifer says three words. She's like, oh, it just looks so.

Please stop. Jennifer, please stop. Whatever you're going to say, just stop it. Well, I was actually not going to talk about that. I was going to talk about how no one had swimming pools in Sedona. But it seems like there's nothing correct that I can say right now. So I will not say anything then good. So she gets up to go to the bathroom

Of course Kyle smells blood in the water I'm about to say Kyle's antennas go up I think it was Kyle who says I'm gonna go to the bathroom And if anyone who's like really pissed off at Sutton Wants to come with me You can come with me And I definitely won't like use your vulnerable state

To get information that I'll use against you To widen the riff that you might be having With your friend Okay I'll be by the bathrooms So it's awkward And then Amanda goes So Sutton Do you cry often?

It's like Amanda. Well, when people snap at you, eventually it affects you. You know, it's like water dripping on a stone. You go, hmm, it's just water, but then it continues to run down the stone. But after some time, the water borers a little hole in the stone. It's a stone with a hole in it, a hole created by water. So Jennifer is like talking with Kyle outside the bathroom.

She's like, I couldn't even get one syllable out. So I'm just going to be quiet I was trying to go And she wouldn't even let me get that far I could get was boom And it was just so disappointing Well I can be like that sometimes But I'm more like the type to be like

I love you and like this is wrong You know what I'm saying Like that's just like what I'm known for Is being just like totally even headed And level headed and like pretty fair And honest to people Well I don't like to be snapped out for no reason Well I literally I was just going to say

I love you but then she snapped at me Well, we're old friends, so I give her a pass because everybody knows that she's fragile, but I do believe that that's one of the reasons Garcel left because it's always about Sutton and not about anybody else ever. But, you know, it's not all about you, Sutton. And Kyle's like, oh, I'm shocked how Jennifer is talking about Sutton. I thought this was like one of her best friends. This is the best night. Oh, God. I wonder if somehow the, like, the teeny tiny crack.

I'm seeing now can be exposed into a giant riff by me going and talking to everybody about how I think that Jennifer is actually really mad at Sutton and that their friendship is like not as tight as we all assumed it was and maybe there are some issues and maybe they are harboring secret resentments that if we're brought to each other's faces would only just grow and grow and grow and grow and grow and grow and Sutton, you know what, honey? No one expects you to be perfect. I know you're working on yourself because we spoke last night. And I've filmed for you, and I've got your beak. Like truly, truly Sutton. And Erica's like, well, don't turn that down. I'm just thank you and rhyme.

And thank you and Ron. She goes, thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Missy. She's like secretly being like, Missy, don't you, don't tell me about me. Dorete. So Rachel's like, thank you for this trip.

It was like so fun. except for the part where we had no fun whatsoever. So good. I loved getting my clothes for half a day before I had to FedEx them back to L.A. It's such a great experience. So it's this terrible trip that ends in Sutton like having a mini freak out. And she goes, you know, I'm just surprised how I've connected with all these women. I mean, finally, I'm part of the group.

I just don't know if I've ever felt part of the group. I'm just so happy. And everyone's going on like, Jesus Christ, Sutton, God. What fuck was that? God damn it. I mean, this show is dreadfully boring, but like it does. It's so fun. It's our longest recap of the week. So there's something to be saying. Like there is something to be said. Okay. Well, it's fun. We talk through it. I still like it. You know, it's not the most exciting season, but they don't all have to be, I guess. Yeah, I guess not. I guess not. Well, thanks everyone for being here. For, you know, I think at the time that we started this recap, we could have flown to Sedona and back. But. Not if Doreet was on the flight. All right, everybody, thanks for being here. We will talk to you next time.

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