Watch What Crappens - #3299 RHORI S1E02: Don’t Rulla Her Out

Episode Date: April 6, 2026

Rulla finally joins the cast of Real Housewives of Rhode Island, and she comes with a cheating husband and a feud with Jo-Ellen. Sadly, Rulla is unable to enjoy some world famous Rhode Island wine wit...h the rest of the ladies; so we’ll have to wait until next week for the full cast to be together.  Join us as we kick off a new era on Bravo! To watch this recap on video, listen to our bonus episodes, and get ad free listening, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. Find bonus episodes at patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens and follow us on Instagram @watchwhatcrappens @ronniekaram @benmandelker Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Well, hello and welcome to watch what crapins, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me today, the one and only Ronnie Karam. Hi, Ronnie. How are you? Well, hello. How are you? I want a cracker. I'm good. What a cracker. Did you bring a crackers today for the Rhode Island recap? Want a cracker? I'm hungry for a cracker. If you don't eat a cracker, you might run over a woman on the highway, so be careful.
Starting point is 00:00:44 Yeah, I ran over a woman. Yeah, we got to be careful. You need a cracker. What the fuck is wrong with this show? It's Real House as a Rhode Island day. It's episode two. Before we go any further, join us for a crappy hour tonight at 5.30 on the West Coast, 830 on the East Coast.
Starting point is 00:01:01 We'll be talking about all sorts of scandalous things happening on Bravo, basically Amanda and West. But there's plenty of other stuff too. So we're going to chime in about that. We also have our Amazon Live. Come join us there. And of course, Patreon. Patreon.com slash watch what crapans.
Starting point is 00:01:15 where we have bonus episodes, we have crap is on demand, where you can watch us, we have a free newsletter, and we also have ad-free listening. So it's a whole font of joy out there on Patreon. So come join us for that. Without any further to adieu,
Starting point is 00:01:33 shall we get into episode two of Rhode Island? Let's do it. Season one, episode two, Ocean State of Affairs. So we start with Liz, and a husband visiting Jerry's parents, Judy and Jerry Sr. Because they're going to have dinner with their kids
Starting point is 00:01:52 because we got to meet daughter Brianna's baby daddy. The parents of that guy. Oh, yeah. Yeah. So Brianna got knocked up. And now we're going to meet the new family. Yeah, exactly. So, yeah, I like this show.
Starting point is 00:02:09 They're like, you know what, we've got a new real housewives. Let's take some inspiration from some of the classics. Do we have a daughter named Brianna? who is in a relationship that may not be good for the rest of her life. Okay, Zach? Okay, great. Get them on here. So, Liz is like, Jerry and I have been married for 11 years.
Starting point is 00:02:26 I think Jerry's a perfect culmination of both of his parents. They're fabulous people. I couldn't love them anymore. Okay? And my stepdaughter, Brianna's life, has been a warwind. Okay, she met this guy. And before you knew it, she was pregnant. It was pretty quick.
Starting point is 00:02:41 It was only, what, a couple of months? Jerry, she told him, and he almost passed out. So she's only met Jerry four or five times, but he's got gorgeous teeth. So that's all you can ask for sometimes. So Liz is like, okay, what are you going to ask them when they get here? And Judy says, Judy's like, my granddaughter is pregnant. What should I say? What are you saying?
Starting point is 00:03:07 You're not going to ask them when the ring is coming? She's like, well, let me feel them out. So Breonna and Zach show up. And Liz tells us, Jerry's daughters mean the world to me. Even though I didn't get birth to them, I feel like a part of my blood closses through them. And when Jerry and I first met, the girls were really little and ended up with us full time.
Starting point is 00:03:27 And it was a time that was, like, more appropriate for them to be with us and not their biological mother. So I definitely did not expect that full-time mom be so full, that role to come first, okay? Yeah, before that, I could wake up, I could drink, I could do whatever I wanted, you know? but I decided my free time. It was quite a change. I always wanted kids of my own. I never thought it would happen this way, but Jerry's girls really fulfilled the need for me.
Starting point is 00:03:57 So the parents show up and, you know, it's like hugs, hugs. Hey, how you're doing? Yeah, yeah, Rigatoni for dinner. What, that's my favorite meal? You got some rigatone? I love Rigatoni too. This is crazy. You found a bunch of people who love rigatone.
Starting point is 00:04:14 So it's all going to work. This is my first grandbaby. It's like a new chapter. It's a new life. Anytime life comes in, it's nothing but joy. But you know what? I don't want to be called. I certainly not grandma or anything grand or nine or none or none,
Starting point is 00:04:29 or none of that. I like Gigi. Give me a Gigi. That's like a double grandma being called G. It's G and the grandmother. Grandma, grandma. Yeah, it's like great grandma. It's double the offense, I think.
Starting point is 00:04:44 So then we go over to Joellen and Ashley, who were taking their kids to the park. Oh, my gosh, man. A new show when people are still youngish and have young kids at home is crazy, isn't it? These four kids, this scene was cracking me out because it's these two ladies trying to have a conversation with snot-nosed brats running everywhere. They have to pay attention to these babies. They're just trying to do a scene. And the baby's like, they're swinging with one hand, holding the baby in the other hand, like trying to get another baby with a foot. Like the image of like Ashley crying and like listlessly shoving her child in the swing like, oh, I am stuck.
Starting point is 00:05:22 This is my life. This is the metaphor. I'm trying to push this away from me and it comes swinging back into my face. And then they showed a scene about like a clip of that baby. They put them in this bucket seat on the swing. And the baby was just like stiff as a board hanging over like, oh. The baby is like, what is this sweet life? That was my favorite shot that they threw in there.
Starting point is 00:05:49 That shot was amazing. So Ashley's telling us, you know, I was really surprised when I got like invited by Joellen because everyone's such a bitch, but like she's actually very nice to me. So I don't know. Yeah, I mean, there are there rumors around the state that she could be quite a bitch. But she's really friendly and she's not scared of a fight, but I don't want to be on Joel's bad side. Are they contractually obligated to make sure anytime that you say that there's a rumor that you have to say that it's a rumor around the state of Rhode Island?
Starting point is 00:06:20 Because every time they mention rumors, they're like, word is going around the state that this person sucks. I'm like, I'm pretty sure it's not really going around the whole state. But I feel like they are like encouraged to add that. It's a tiny state, but I feel like they're also, Bravo's encouraging them to say the state to establish Rhode Island as a place for people in America who are like, like, where are they anyway? Because like the amount of times they mentioned, they contextualize everything within the state of Rhode Island is like kind of crazy.
Starting point is 00:06:51 Yeah. So they're talking about the Fourth of July party. She goes, even Jared had a good time, you know? Like he's not really big into social events, but even he had a good time. She's like, yeah, thank you. I'm so glad you had fun, you know. You know, because your first impression of me was at Rosie's picnic
Starting point is 00:07:08 and that wasn't great. And she's like, I don't care. I wasn't, I've been on the bachelor's. I was not amazed. I was about to say this lady's been on Riyadh, TV, I'm sure she doesn't really care. So Joanne says, well, I did tell Kelsey at the 4th of July party about the picnic and how Rosie and Alicia were questioning her relationship.
Starting point is 00:07:26 And that was kind of what was bothering me a bit about Rosie. She goes, well, I feel like you guys will just be fine. She's like, no, I just need to exist around her. That's that. She's, well, why don't you guys just start completely clean? Well, that's the plan right now. I'm just trying to turn over a new page. And she tells us, yeah, you know, like my personalities with that girl, they don't mesh, you know, Rosie.
Starting point is 00:07:47 Like, I think there's like their similarities. Sure. Like, we both like aesthetic treatments. So there's that. And we're both brunettes. So, you know, she's photogenic. I'm photogenic. There was a bitchy Joellen line.
Starting point is 00:08:01 Did you hear Joellen's a bitch? The whole state says it. So, Joellen's like, how's the business doing rumors around the state are that doing nicely, huh? And then we see a shot of Jared at work. And he's like, the ice machine is broken again. Godfam it. I can help, honey. Sorry, what was that?
Starting point is 00:08:20 Order up for Kathy. So, I just like, yeah, it's a constant stress. Like, I wanted to support his dream, but I had no idea.
Starting point is 00:08:27 It would be that hard. You know, and then he's feeling like he's failing. And then he gets sunshiny days. And he's always telling me, honey, it's not you. It's not the kids.
Starting point is 00:08:33 I just hate my life. I mean, sure, you're in the life. The kids are in the life. But it's not because you're in the life. It's just because you're in my life. and I'm miserable. Do you understand? I don't understand.
Starting point is 00:08:44 Why am I crying? And meanwhile, she's pushing a baby. A baby's running around. It's not flying everywhere. I was dying laughing. He tells me all the time, like, whenever I'm moody and dark, it's not about you. It's never about you. And then he says something like, Colbrook, ready for Susan. And I'm like, there is no Susan. We're at home. He goes, I know. I just like to pretend I'm at the shop sometimes. I thought he had sleep apnea because he kept waking me up in the middle of the night going, but he wasn't dying. He was just steaming in his sleep.
Starting point is 00:09:17 He says something about like how when we're at home, he has to pretend that there's a latte foamer there so he doesn't have to listen to my voice. I don't know. It doesn't make sense. I mean, I want him to have his moments where he plays golf and softball without like me being annoyed. But it's like, oh my God, you know, like I'm just going to be alone for five hours like this. She like points to the kids because this is such a man thing too. It's like you're raising the kids. You're the one stuck at home with these fucking and then your hot husband who got himself a coffee bar to work out all day. Comes home and is like, I'm depressed.
Starting point is 00:09:53 They hate my life. Yeah, well, everybody fucking hates their life. It doesn't give you the right to just be a fucking lump of coal. Wake the fuck up. You're not the only person you would think that I'm married. My God. I got so bad. But it's true.
Starting point is 00:10:05 This guy has bought coffee all day and she's actually taking care of kids. I think the kids thing is harder. Yeah, it's harder and we see it in action and it looks like bloody hell and we're only subjected to five minutes of it. And it looks so hard. And then he's like, I'm depressed. We'll get the fuck over it. Okay. I cleaned a shitty diaper like 20 times today.
Starting point is 00:10:26 Like someone peed in my face today. Okay, Jared. But the thing here with Ashley is anyone who watched The Bachelor in Paradise and saw this relationship. this is just how Jared is. He's just miserable. He's always skulking around. He's always depressed. Don't marry depressed people.
Starting point is 00:10:41 And this isn't a general thing against actual depression, by the way, anybody. I'm just saying don't marry a sad sack and then wonder why your husband's always sad. Because you married a sad sack. What do you want? What do you expect him to be? A fucking juggling balls like a clown? It's Jared. You married Jared.
Starting point is 00:10:59 Well, she also says that they have a nanny who is there for 33 hours a week. And so she's like, I should be able to handle it, but I can. So Joelle's like, Ashley, you need people. Yeah, I'll tell you just depressed. That fucking nanny. That manning's for sure. Depression. Yeah, I'm sure they don't even give her free coffee.
Starting point is 00:11:16 And Joanne's like, Ashley, you need peace of mind too. And you know what? So I'm going to leave now. I'm going to leave you because you're depressing me too much. Okay, bye. The whole state says so. You're depressing. So, yeah, they leave.
Starting point is 00:11:33 And she's like, oh, God. Gosh, you know, like Ashley, like, what a nice girl. But Joanne's face looks like, do not ever make me shoot with that woman again. Jesus. I know. So now Liz and Kelsey go to Fleur Providence, and they're talking about it. Oh, hi. By the way, shout out.
Starting point is 00:11:50 Hi, everyone. Everyone out there. Just realized that we're. I published this incorrectly. And so now we're doing a live. It's a live show, everyone. I just realized a little comment popped up on my screen. that said, oh my God, loving it.
Starting point is 00:12:05 I was like, loving it. That's all getting me. So here we go. So, Flour Providence. So Kelsey and her getting a drink, you know. And she goes, do you want to drink, Liz? And Liz is like, does a dog have an ass? Just a bear shit in the woods.
Starting point is 00:12:26 So they order their drinks and everything. And then, like, this is funny because I feel like this probably happens a lot. But for whatever reason, This server hit the Bravo lottery. Someone comes by and is like, Caesar salad. They're like, nah, I didn't order Caesar salad.
Starting point is 00:12:40 Nah, we didn't want to see the salad. And the guy's like, ooh, my livelihood being shown on national TV. I was like, this poor waiter gets roasted on Bravo for bringing Caesar salad to the wrong table. Like, they didn't, why did they keep that in the show? How are you accidentally bringing it to the only table that's being filled right now, sir? It's time for a commercial.
Starting point is 00:13:02 It's time for a crappence commercial. show. Maybe Rula ordered it preemptively. Like, have my season salad waiting for the year. It's Rula. So I know Rula for a decade now. We know each other through the boating community. Both parties with friends are a big thing in the summer in Rhode Island, you know.
Starting point is 00:13:23 And Rula and I have a heritage in common. I have Sarian. Rulers have Syrian, and I typically always adore my Middle Eastern girls. And Kelsey is... Rula comes in. She's like, hello. Hello, hello, hello. And Kelsey's like, I've known Rula through Liz, and she's classy and very put together, which when you look at Rula, you know, I'm thinking like, oh, look at that classy lady.
Starting point is 00:13:48 Sign her up for a polo game at the Hamptons. It's more like you're wearing a bikini top to lunch. I mean, that is a classy lady right there. When I see Rula, I'm like, oh, finally someone to sell me a futon. So she's like, she's very calm and monotone. That's so specific. Well, doesn't Rula sort of look like someone who'd be on a commercial being like, calm down to Rula's furniture.
Starting point is 00:14:18 We've got futons and sofas and convertables and prices that you can afford. If you think you can't afford one of Rula's sofas, guess what? We have layaway plans just for you. And I feel like there should be like a spark. Come to Rulas for a futon. Rulers where the country. customer always rule. Lace.
Starting point is 00:14:36 Take exit 49 off of I-95 and your first left, Rulers. So Kelsey's like, yeah, she's so classy. You know, we literally just met Rula on this one baseline level. You know, I'm sure she's got some emotions, you know, because she's pretty monotone. But like, I don't know, maybe there's no emotions. Maybe she's a serial killer. I don't know. And I love that Rula, so she wasn't on last week, or the first episode, but they made it sound like, oh, my God, guys, Rula is coming.
Starting point is 00:15:09 Rula's coming to the show. We see the previews, Rula, Rula's coming. And Rula gets here. She's like, hi, does someone try to deliver a Caesar salad to me? Did you guys get my Caesar salad? You know, I'm half Seraian, half Caesar Saladian. So Liz is like, oh, well, hi. Well, guess what?
Starting point is 00:15:29 Joellen hosted a party for the fourth. It was fun. We missed you. She's like, oh, yeah, that sounds nice. You know, I've been a little bit more on the outside lately. I mean, what is it about the both of you that, you know, make you want to hang out with Joellen? She's like, Joellen and I have definitely had ups and downs. And she's a rep in the beauty business. My husband, Brian, and I know a lot of people in the industry. And she comes across as friendly and bubbly. And that's not always the truth. She goes, you guys said she's a shit-stirer. She's talking about me and my husband.
Starting point is 00:16:03 She's stirring up rumors. Oh, my God, they're getting a divorce, et cetera, et cetera. He's leaving her for this petty fucking slut. There, I said it. You know, I have to have you back. You know, the second I hear an echo is something I'm calling you, Rula. All right? The same breath, though, Rula, I know you.
Starting point is 00:16:22 And I know that you was never going to want to admit something's fucked up, Rula. Okay. And she tells us, from what I've seen, the Brian and Rood, they always look like the perfect couple. They always look super happy. However, there goes all around Rhode Island, the Brian's got a mistress. She was like, in case you couldn't tell from what I was doing, a mistress, he's got a mistress. So Kelsey's like, so are you open to talking about it? She goes, well, Liz called.
Starting point is 00:17:01 We started to talk. She was nervous about it and obviously uncomfortable. And I would say, you know, and she said, look, I don't know. I don't know that there was some something going on. Like I said, there's photos posted online. And I put you in touch with the person who knew the photos. That's what I did. Okay.
Starting point is 00:17:18 And we see that there's this photo, Brian, with a great. girl on his lap and he's kissing her cheek. And I'm always just so amused by these men of a certain age who still don't really understand social media and the internet that like if you take a photo with your mistress, it's going to go on the internet and people will
Starting point is 00:17:36 look at it and see it and share it. I also like how on this show they don't just cross out or block out the person's face. They literally rip it from the photo. They're dead. They're dead. It's like revenge. They're all dead. So she's like, yeah, Joellen had some photos that was posted at Brian and that cockroach.
Starting point is 00:17:59 She smiles. She's like, at first, I thought Joellen was trying to be supportive and help me because we're girls, you know. But then it turns out she shared the pictures with the whole group and was running a mouth around town. And that was not okay with me. Yeah, then maybe your husband shouldn't be fucking around. And you shouldn't be calling the woman who's fucking him a cockroach. What's wrong with you? Your husband's a cheater.
Starting point is 00:18:18 I yeah Rula is definitely like of the type where she's going to lash out at all the other women in the situation instead of the guy who is the active party and the one that's closest to you who is the one that you should be kicking to the curb girl your husband is fucking around and posting pictures of the girl on Instagram you best bet I'm going to be bringing it to lunch to show the girls of course yeah so Kelsey's like well that photo of Brian and that lady you know she's a ho not a lady oh oh okay well he posts that in the wintertime and from what I understand, she had a summer outfit on. So do you think this is going on for a long time? Kelsey. I love Kelsey's detective work. And she goes, it was last summer.
Starting point is 00:19:01 She's just, but what about now? Well, nothing's been happening. That's been done. This is not still ongoing. This has not been ongoing. Show me that it's ongoing. She goes, okay, well, so if it's soft, then that's the end of it, right?
Starting point is 00:19:14 What are you insinuating the truth is? Because there's a lot of talk about my husband's involved, or he's still? And she goes, but he is, baby, he is ma, he is ma. It's the best moment. But he is ma. He is ma. He is ma.
Starting point is 00:19:31 He's still out there, ma. Ma. Ma. Out there, ma. Come on, ma. Babe, but he is ma. So Liz is like, it's pretty out there that Brian's still doing his thing with this woman. I mean, if Rolla tries to not, not to acknowledge,
Starting point is 00:19:48 that what's really going on and live in that kind of land of delusion. I'm sorry. Elizabeth is allergic to that bullshit. I'm Elizabeth for people who don't know. Me, Liz is short for Elizabeth. A common nickname in Rhode Island. Everyone in the state knows Elizabeth means Liz. You gotta stop with the prideful thing, Ma.
Starting point is 00:20:06 You're stupid proud. I mean, like, it doesn't benefit you. We've all been going through it. She's like, I know, I know you all. You shared with me. You know, like the stuff with you, Rula. stuff with you and Jerry that you shared with me. You didn't kick Jerry to the curb. You took time. You processed. You thought about it. And look at you guys. Look how many years you've been together.
Starting point is 00:20:27 I mean, what are you? First sister and brother? It's been a long time. It's been a very long time. So Rilla's like, Liz has shared with me her issues and Jerry and the misunderstandings and indiscretions. And she's done a thing and he's done his thing. And he'd be away on a fishing excursion or whatever. And they'd say, well, you know, when the cats away, the mice shall play. And I'll leave it at that because everyone in Rhode Island knows what cats and mice do, right? They fuck. They fuck. The cats and the mice.
Starting point is 00:20:58 They fuck the second they're on. Fuck and people think they eat in. But they do eat if you know what I'm saying. I love that rule is like, oh, really? You're going to bring up my affair? Let's talk about your affairs. So she goes, well, um, this says, well, listen, you know, look, I'm willing to say this is going on because you have kids, you know?
Starting point is 00:21:16 And she goes, well, that's what it is too. Because when you produce the kids with somebody, like you actually get a penis in there, spermatozoa comes out, hits an egg, and the baby is made. That's a game changer. Because, you know, Jerry has kids, but you don't have your own kids, you know. So you know what I'm saying, right? And she goes, oh, yeah, right, right.
Starting point is 00:21:34 When you produce them with someone, not when you bring them up for when they're fucking three because they don't have a mother to do it. But all right, continue, rule, continue, continue, continue. Continue down that. No disrespect. No disrespect. Continue.
Starting point is 00:21:47 It's, it's, you know, I would never want to disrespect someone who's never produced their own children. So no disrespect whatsoever. You don't know what it's like to have a baby crowning through your vagina. So no disrespect. No disrespect whatsoever. Okay. Okay. Thanks a lot.
Starting point is 00:22:03 Well, thanks a lot. No, I did not have my own kids. But you have no idea what I've done in my life bringing up kids. Maybe not producing them, but I brought them up, okay? Oh, sorry they didn't come out for me. Sorry. Sorry that my, sorry that my Rhode Island didn't come out of my United States.
Starting point is 00:22:21 If you know what I'm saying. Sorry, I lost a metaphor on that one. But you know what I'm saying? Sorry. So you'll say to me, when you produce the kids, take it back. You don't take it back. You take it back right now. She says, I apologize.
Starting point is 00:22:34 I care for you. I care about your comfort, which is why I'm offering you a four inch thick futon for 30% off. Listen, I didn't mean it that way. way. And you know I didn't, but I swear you, my husband, we've been in a great place. I would just like everybody to respect that. Sperma to Zoa has touched my egg.
Starting point is 00:22:52 Please. There's a lot of fake out there. Well, hi, it's me, Kelsey. I'm still in the scene. I know, I feel that way. I've been in the exact same position as you. I get it. Believe me. Because I can sympathize with Rula in this situation. Joe Ellen's
Starting point is 00:23:07 Fourth of July party, like everyone had questions. Rumors in Rhode Island are like wildfire. Whether they're true or not, they spread. So next time you see an untrue wildfire, just know it's spreading whether you like it or not. I like that she makes it all about yourself. It's not the same as you. Her husband, which she has children with is cheating on her. You're dating a guy who's openly fucking other people. It's not the same thing, Kelsey. Oh, my gosh. So, um, Liz is like, whatever people think I'm loving. It's not of my business. It's not of my business.
Starting point is 00:23:43 And she goes, yeah, baby, bring it. Watch out. So now Kelsey's boyfriend, we go to Kelsey's boyfriend's mansion. And she's there with her housekeeper, Christina. And she's like, okay, you got to open the wine for us. You know how to use this electric wine opener? She's like, no. She goes, like this.
Starting point is 00:24:00 You do it like this. You put it on top of the thing. You press a button. She's like, okay. Fine. Whatever. So I guess I like this. She acts like Christina does everything for her, but she doesn't know how to open a bottle of wine.
Starting point is 00:24:13 Come on. Where did you get Christina? Did you just pick Christina up off the street? Yeah. So Alicia comes over. Well, I like Alicia is also surprised to see Christina because Alicia rings the doorbell and Christina, well, first of all, Christina and Alicia, I'm sorry, Christina and Kelsey are standing together in the kitchen.
Starting point is 00:24:29 There's a doorbell rings and Kelsey is like, there's someone at the door, which I'm like, oh, you fucking bitch, you can't even open your own door for your own guest. So Christina goes open the door and she goes, go Christina. Yeah, like, go get it. She's like, oh, okay. So then Alicia, she's greeted, and Alicia just stares at, Christine goes, oh, hello.
Starting point is 00:24:51 He stares her like, am I at the right house? Like, what? I don't understand what happened here. I drove all the way over here. I don't even like to drive. So then Kelsey comes over. She's like, oh, hi. Oh, God.
Starting point is 00:25:03 So, yeah, sorry, I brought cracker. I brought crackers, but I didn't bring cheese. The line was too long for the cheese. I was like, What's the The cracker line? If you only have crackers in your basket, we can take you over an aisle six.
Starting point is 00:25:19 And I got cheese too. I'm so hungry, ma'am. Separate line. Separate line. In Rhode Island, that's how we do it. Oh, my gosh. So she's like, yeah, I meant to get cheese, so I bought crackers. I love crackers.
Starting point is 00:25:30 But the line was so long for the cheese. I said, whatever, she'll figure it out. You got cheese? Do you not got cheese? Okay, you're not figuring it out. Okay, I believe it to you. But, you know, that was wrong. so.
Starting point is 00:25:42 So Kelsey is like, well, I know you're always good for a good crackers. Like, you know, if you're from Rhode Island, born and bred, you're a different person in your breed. Alicia is so Rhode Island. I thought Kelsey was about to say, if you're from the Rhode Island, one thing you love are crackers. I was like, please don't make crackers a Rhode Island thing. But thankfully she didn't.
Starting point is 00:26:01 Because this is the first time ever on reality TV where crackers have been given so much love. I mean, normally it's like, oh my God, I have to have my car. I have to have my coffee or I have to have this. There's usually some random food that someone tried to make their personality. And this is the first time we've seen someone say, I gotta have a cracker. I got to have a cracker. I love a cracker. I love a cracker. Got to have it.
Starting point is 00:26:21 So she's like, so you know I came here a long time ago, right? Yeah. Yeah. I've been to this house. Yeah, like 10 years ago. Yeah. He had a Fourth of July party. My best friend, Crystal.
Starting point is 00:26:30 She left me on the side of the road. I had to walk to a Dunkin' Donuts with my phone died. Oh, God. God. So I've been to the bridge, you know, I've been there. I've done that with driving. You know what? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:26:41 You know, I've been over the bridge. Like, I can't drive. Like, it's difficult. Like, I've been through it. I ran someone off the road one time. I almost fell off the bridge. I ran over a woman. And the producer's like, you ran over a woman.
Starting point is 00:26:53 She goes, yeah. Yeah, I ran over a woman. I almost died. Swear to God. Did she? Who's the woman? What happened to the woman? She's like, oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:27:04 It was the scariest thing ever. I ran over a woman. But, you know what? I'm okay. I'm like, we're not worried about you. She, and I like when she was saying that she, it's like, this party, she's like, I almost died walking to that Dunkin' Donuts. Kelsey's like, you, you walked from here?
Starting point is 00:27:21 Yeah, I almost, I swear to God, I almost died. I almost died. Well, I mean, I didn't almost died. I mean, but like I had to walk and she left me in the woods. There was a Duncan in the woods. Do you know there's a Duncan in the woods? She's like, oh, my God, this lady's crazy. So we see Alicia driving because Kelsey.
Starting point is 00:27:37 He's like, yeah, she can't drive. And we see her driving. And she's like, oh, my God, what are you going to get my lane now? Like, what are you doing? Like, this highway, the traffic's a little bridge, stupid car. Fix your car. Fix your car. You know, Alicia is the one who's, like, driving everyone batty on that bridge.
Starting point is 00:27:53 He's probably, like, swerving, reaching for crackers. I got to get my cars. What a crack out down here. You know, the only car I'm really comfortable with other car brand of crackers. So she's like, so, you know, I kind of feel bad because, like, I feel like at the 4th of July party, which was great, by the way. Did you have fun at the party? She's like, yeah. Well, yeah, it's so much fun. Yeah. Yeah, with the situation that almost happened at the picnic, you know, like, I shouldn't have said what I said. I shouldn't have said. I shouldn't have what I said.
Starting point is 00:28:18 So I should not. Listen, I appreciate you saying that, and I get everyone's got to have questions. I'm not mad at Joellen. But if she segued this conversation into like, Rosie asking anything about my relationship, you know, would I have rather not? Probably. Yeah, but it wasn't malicious about it. You know, it just was like, you know, she's just getting to be a little nosy. That's it. I mean, I almost died also when I listened to. I don't know if you know this. I had to walk to a Duncan after that picnic. It was very scary. Well, that's Rhode Island for you, huh? I mean, speaking of rumors, me and Liz saw Rue the other night at Rula, and, you know, she's not a fan of Joellen. And, you know, Joella's a gasoline to the mistress fire that's going on right now. And she just keeps pumping it and pouring it and pouring gasoline on it.
Starting point is 00:29:01 And Alicia's like, yeah, yeah, you know, actually, I like Rula. Like her family? the jewelry shop that we go to us really close with Billy and a family also goes to Billy's restaurant a lot and I feel like she's got a bushy vibe to her when Rula talks she's like very fancy she's like hi yes Alicia I believe that is that me talking is that me talking breathy hold that does that different hold on let me do it again
Starting point is 00:29:22 hey Alicia it's me Rula it's pretty good right She's doing sophisticated voice is hilarious You wanna quacka You know, the credit. Alicia's just like, what is the idea, by the way? Kelsey goes, well, according to her, there is no deal.
Starting point is 00:29:40 Everything status quo and hunky dory. So he's not cheating. It's like, not according to her. Again, I haven't talked to her about it, but I keep hearing all these stories. And I'm like, oh, my God. Like, please, someone give me something. I want to know. I need to know.
Starting point is 00:29:54 Like, I mean, the rumors are flying all around the state of Rhode Island. You know, state of a thousand rumors. Kelsey, it's like, we need to have a wine event where everybody gets together and we ask each other questions because there's just so much going around. And she flings her glass and ice goes everywhere. And only she goes, you see, I do that what's going to happen. That's why I'm psychic. That's why.
Starting point is 00:30:14 Like everyone knows that. That's why because I knew what's going to happen. The minute I walked in here, I saw that little lady standing with the white open and I said, ice is going to spill tonight. That's why I should have been a psychic. That's what I should have been. I like that Kelsey goes, you know what? I think it's time we channel our inner Hillary Duff and decide to come clean.
Starting point is 00:30:31 I'm like, ma'am, I'm going to tell you this right now. Three quarters of your cast is not going to understand your reference. You know, Liz, it's like, I don't know if I understand that joke. We'll still be deaf anyway. Here comes one right now. So now we go to Rula's home in Lincoln, Rhode Island. And her kids are swimming and she, you're doing great kids. Wow.
Starting point is 00:31:01 So she tells us Rhode Island so special. I was born right in the capital, Providence, Rhode Island. I live in an upscale town, Lincoln, Rhode Island. I wouldn't live what Joellen lives. I would never live in Cranston. It's just not my vibe. Now, I was a little surprised that Joellen was from Cranston because I don't know anything. I might know some things about Rhode Island, but I don't know much.
Starting point is 00:31:24 But what I've always heard is that Cranston is like not the best. I've always heard Cranston is kind of like Rhode Island's Patterson. So I was a little surprised when they're looking. like, Cranston, Rhode Island. I was like, I did not think this was like a real housewives neighborhood. And I would like Rhode Island people to correct me or fill me in on this one. So when Rula says, oh, I wouldn't live in Cranston, I was like, aha, see, that's what I thought I'd heard about this place. But in fact, since we are live, people from Rhode Island can fill it in there in the comments. And we will report live back on what people say. But Rula says,
Starting point is 00:31:55 I'm a nautical girl. I own a boat. I'm one of the only female captains in Rhode Island. watch out boys this bitch is come and like drop the mic here i am i can captain a small boat watch out i'm the only captain drop the mic here i am fucking robot ruler so then we see is this by the way oh yeah i was going to ask is this where we see her baby photos oh i don't think so i don't know i don't remember but she's like okay i'm going to prove to you right now that I'm a businesswoman. Let's go to a car scene. So we go to Rula in her car. Her lips are gigantic and she's like, everyone tells me I run a tight ship, especially at the office. Here, here's me. I have projections on the pie chart of the sheet of Excel's Google sheet,
Starting point is 00:32:47 pages versus Microsoft's word, boss bitch. I'm a boss bitch. I run a tight ship, which is a pun, because I also am a captain of small boats. Drop the mic. Drop the mic. Very funny. We see that we, somewhere in here, we see pictures of her as a baby. And they're like, we see her as like, like five months old. And it's a picture of her smoking a hookah.
Starting point is 00:33:15 And I cracked up. She's just like a little baby. It'll just like sitting there on the sofa. And someone has taken like the little pipe, you know, I put it on her mouth. It is the funniest. photo. So I've been my friend, Brian comes out. Look at Brian. Hi, Brian. You're doing so great, honey. Brian is my husband. I've been with him for 12 years, married for nine. He's a podiatrist. He does a lot of foot and ankle surgery. And then we cut to Brian. He's like, yeah, that foot's real fucked up. Yeah. Normally,
Starting point is 00:33:49 I love tall, dark, and handsome. And my husband is lighter, a little shorter. And, uh, I mean, think he's handsome. He got kind of one of the three. Yeah. I don't know. Real convincing there, Rula. We cut to him again being like, all right, notes on the ingrown toenail surgery. Everything's going fine so far. So. She tells us she's Syrian descent. She's Lebanese and Syrian. Her dad's from Babe Ruth. Her mom's from Syria. And, but she's 100% Italian because those two, and he's 100% Italian and the two cultures go together because rigatoni, rigatoni, family, rigatoni, rigatoni. Rigotony, rigatoni. That's what we believe.
Starting point is 00:34:37 Yeah, you know, we just match. And she goes, it's just killing me because everybody in the state has made it their business and everybody in this group has made it their business to talk about us. Can you imagine how hard it is for us when the entire state of Rhode Island is paying attention to who this podiatrist is sleeping with? Am I right? So instead of firing away on stuff, you know, come and speak with the source. That's what I say. Yeah, so it's like, listen, what happened last year?
Starting point is 00:35:03 Happened last year. It's in the past. I just want to move forward. Yeah, I bet you do. So she tells us, when I saw the cheating pictures, I looked at Brian and I said, is there anything that I should know? And he said, you've got very flat feet. I said, you better tell me now. He said, you should wear insults.
Starting point is 00:35:21 He says, you know what? You're like a plant or what? You're on the bottom of my foot. You'll always be there. So don't worry about it, Rula. I said, okay. I'm okay. It's fine.
Starting point is 00:35:31 So I found out he was begging. He was pleading. He was crying. And she tells him, I'm just tired of making it, everybody making it that business. He goes, we know what's strong. Obviously, I'm with you. I let you track me. You know where I am every second.
Starting point is 00:35:45 I love my wife. I love my family. They're just jealous, you know? Yeah, let me see where you are right now. Why does this say you're in your office? Oh, shit. I let my phone in the office. I'll be back. I'll be back to wiping his face.
Starting point is 00:35:58 He's like, uh, never mind. Never mind. So now we go to Alicia's house, uh, because we're going to go to this Newport Vineyards. And, um, Alicia's like, I don't leave the house without a quick cob. Okay, I love my saltines because I get, in case I get nauseous. I got nuts for protein in case I feel lightheaded. I love a cracker. Figs. You know, you never know when you need a fig. Uh, figs are also really good to feed to someone who's just been renovated by your car. It really helps them stay focused instead. alive. I just feel like it's healthy because it's like a cookie, but it's filled with fruit. So by Figg, she met Figg Newton's. So they all start arriving and getting on the van and hugging each other. And Ashley comes and she's wearing this like Renaissance dress, like this kind of hippie Renaissance dress. And like, oh my God, what is she wearing? And then she goes,
Starting point is 00:36:46 Ashley's outfit is different. It's like she's, what, she turned into Irish or something? Like, I don't know if that's medieval something or what, but like, is that folklore? Like, like, like, what they say folklore, you know, when they have the lambs and the women on the mountains? Folklore. What the fucklaw? I'm like, please tell me, please tell me that's a word, folklore? That's a word. Folkla? Is she a folklore? Does she have any crack? Does she have any crack? I was like,
Starting point is 00:37:06 are you thinking of yodeler? I kind of felt like she was thinking of yodeler. Because she wasn't quite saying folklore. She was like, focal, focal, focal, like you're trying to say yodeler, aren't you? You're thinking of like a woman on the mountains with a horn. Yeah, probably. So Ashley is last, and so they're all there now. And Rosie's fine with seeing Joellen because she's fine when she's not a bear. It's like the biggest
Starting point is 00:37:27 bitch in the state. And Ashley is saying, yeah, I moved to Rhode Island because when you marry a guy from Rhode Island, you move to Rhode Island. He's a great guy. He's a great guy. Wait, hold on. Oh, he's texting. He's calling me right now. Hi. Hi. Oh, um, Joellen, your, your coffee is ready. She's like, oh, me, my God, like, so hard-making friends. and then like making friends in your 30s? Like is that even a thing? Like are we evolved to make friends in our 30s? So they start to drive.
Starting point is 00:38:05 It's their first sprinter van scene. They're spilling champagne everywhere because of bumps and everything. And Kelsey and Joellen and Alicia are talking about how they love wine. And Alicia loves rosé, but they don't. But Kelsey basically is like, I like cheap wine. I like what they call stripper juice and $8 bottle wine. You know, give it that to me and I'll be happy, but don't make me open it. Okay, that's for Christina.
Starting point is 00:38:29 Don't make me open my own wine. Joe Allen's like, I'm not really a wine connoisseur, but I would say I'm a wine snob because I just buy expensive bottles, okay? That's Joe Welling. And ask anyone in the state, they'll tell you, I'm a real bitch. So they arrive at, you know, the heart of American wine production, Rhode Island, the Newport Vineyards. And they're getting a tour and they're these big.
Starting point is 00:38:54 that's and Alicia's like, oh, is this what they, is this what they use for heroin? It kind of reminds me breaking bad right now. And the Dworkad is like, uh, nope, he's not put that out there either. Thank you. She's never seen, she's never seen that before. She's a character that Alicia. So Joellen and Kelsey are still outside. Everybody goes into the lunch table.
Starting point is 00:39:16 And Joellen, uh, Joan's like, what's wrong with you? And Kelsey's like, I just wanted to warn you, Rula's coming. She says, why? Why is she coming? And she goes, well, Liz and we met with her. She says, oh, lovely. Well, you know, I haven't known Rula long. I just met her through Liz.
Starting point is 00:39:30 However, I 100% am getting the brunt of the blame from Rula. Her husband was having an affair. I shared a picture that the mistress posted on the internet. And Helen is not like, what the hell? Like, why am I blamed? So Alicia's like, uh-oh, Joella's going to turn up tonight, you guys. Uh-oh. Joel is coming.
Starting point is 00:39:49 Watch out. Joe, Joe, hell. More like Joe, Helen. Get it? Joe Helen. You know what I'm saying? So Liz goes, well, Ashley's saying, well, why don't Joellen and Rula get along? And Liz says, well, the records of Ruler's husband having a fair. And Alicia was like, Joellen took a picture and sent it to Rula. So she was the one that was informed? Like, what's the big deal?
Starting point is 00:40:14 She was the messenger. And she got a, you know, she's got little kids. And her husband's a foot doctor. And I think that, like, he's doing more than rubbing feet. Anyone want some cheese? I love that they get all these wine flights and Alicia at one point just goes, Can I get some bread? Like, yeah, I think a husband's doing a lot. I think a husband's banging a lot of people, if you know what I mean. Anyone want some cheese?
Starting point is 00:40:40 Anyone want some cheese? Can I get some bread? Come on. Can I get some bread here? So back to Joellen and Kelsey. Joe Allen is like really pissed. She's like, I'm on TV and I'm going to be extremely pissed about this. Now, I'm not here to publicize that her husband's having an affair.
Starting point is 00:40:54 She knows it. It's like, well, she's telling me she doesn't know it. I mean, come on. I sent her the pictures where the husband and the mistress are making out. They're making out the picture. And then we see the photo from December 2024, the winter photo that was taken in the summer. And Joellen is like, last year, right around New Year's, I saw a picture on Instagram. And it was Brian Rula, Rula's husband, okay, with another woman.
Starting point is 00:41:17 And I sent it to Liz. And Liz showed it to Rula. and Rula called me and she was begging me for the pictures. She was like, well, please, woman to woman, send them to me. So I did. And then you could hear, she gasped. She had an audible gasp. So Kelsey's like, well, I said if you have questions for Joellen, you should probably just ask her.
Starting point is 00:41:34 It's like, it's not my question. Stop stealing my line because that's what I said about you, by the way. And her husband's the one stepping out. Don't fucking ask me a single thing. She's like, it's not my problem. You want to call my job? You want to start shit because I'll fucking bring it. She goes, oh, yeah, I didn't bring that part up.
Starting point is 00:41:49 She said, oh, you didn't even bring up. She called my job. You didn't bring that up? She goes, yeah, I didn't get there yet. Well, you know what? That's like a big deal to me. Forward six months later, Rula and her husband call my work, wrote emails into HR complaining about me to get me fired, all because he knows that I know that he's having an affair.
Starting point is 00:42:05 I don't know what my job has to do with that. That's crazy. Rula called her job to complain. Rula, your husband is a cheater, okay? Yeah. That's crazy. Rula is clearly going to be the villain of the season. which I love.
Starting point is 00:42:20 It's because I felt like we didn't really have a villain after the first episode. So this is good. And so Joellen is like, I don't give a fuck what she feels. Tell her to keep her husband's dick in his pants. That's not my problem. Don't come at me because your husband's sleeping with somebody. What do I have to do with it? Fuck with my husband.
Starting point is 00:42:35 Fuck my kids. Fuck my job. I'm going to ruin your fucking life. And she does give Jen Aiden here. She's like, yeah, you want to fuck with me? Fuck with me. I'll ruin your life. Unless she like lifts her eyebrows.
Starting point is 00:42:46 I don't know if I could do that. I probably need Botox. She's like, yeah. So then we go back inside and the girls are still talking about this. And Ashley's trying to put it together. She's like, wait a minute. So this woman and her husband is a foot doctor and may have had an affair. And Joellen may have let her know about the affair.
Starting point is 00:43:07 Okay, I think I've got it. Ashley, keep up. So now everyone's now at the table. And because Kelsey and Joelan have sat down at this table. and Kelsey is going to confirm. She's going to call up Brilla to be like, are you still on the way? But then the waitress comes up.
Starting point is 00:43:26 It's like, so does anyone want to order anything? And they all just stare at the waitress. Like, who do you think you? The entire state's been talking about you, waitress. And no one likes you. Does anybody want to seize your salad? Get the fuck out of you. So they're like, why do you look so upset, Joelle?
Starting point is 00:43:42 And she goes, you know, I'm not trying to be this awful mean person, but this person tried to hurt me in my job. And you come from me and my work and my financial state. You're not just coming for me. You're coming for my children. It's like, oh, wow. Episode two, we're already getting that. How dare you do this to my children?
Starting point is 00:43:58 So Rula is now FaceTiming, Kelsey. She's like, oh, hi, baby. I'm so sorry, I can't make it. I was an urgent care. I was an urgent care. I'm not going to be there today. Do I go? Okay.
Starting point is 00:44:13 Apparently, I saw that in order to get to Newport. Rhode Island will have to drive through Crenston and I got an instant case of Crenstinitis and I just can't come. I'm just too sick. I'm just too sick by the association of Crenston. I'm sorry. My car had to pass Alicia's house and it stopped. It stopped. It couldn't go any further. The house
Starting point is 00:44:30 is just too embarrassing. I had to come home. So, Joelle, there's like these boxes for the game they're about to play. I said Joellen picks one of the boxes up and throws it in the bushes. I was like, you're littering, ma'am. So Alicia's like, so what happened? Where was she?
Starting point is 00:44:46 She's like, she's in bed. And Rosie's like, with a hat and full glam on too, I'd like to add. Like, oh, a hat and full glam. Classic ruler. Joanne says, she's not sick. She gets headaches because she's stressed out from taking too much of Zempec. Have a protein paw. Get a turkey leg from Ashley.
Starting point is 00:45:04 That was funny. I got to Ashley in her crazy outfit. Duelan's like, I'm done. I don't want to talk about her anymore. Okay? So, Kelsey goes, guys, I have a little game that Bravo wants me play with everyone. I feel like we've all said something. We've all heard something. I know I was talked about at the picnic. Oh God, Kelsey. Nobody cares. They're like, oh, God, Kelsey. It's like,
Starting point is 00:45:28 okay, Rula didn't show up for drama, so Kelsey's going to whip out her stupid, like, people think, people are trying to accuse me of having a polygamous relationship, which I love that she keeps saying polygamous. Yeah. So, um, Kelsey is like, okay, I have questions. You have questions. So we've all got questions. So let's just air the questions out, you know. So we're going to write down questions and put them in a box and then we're going to read each other's questions. And so, uh, Rosie's like, oh my God, I got sharpy on my nail. That's never going to come out. She's like seriously upset. You can see her. She's like, guys, guys, I got sharp in my nail. Like, what do I do? Should I just leave? So Ashley's like, okay. All right. So the question for me, Ashley, when did you lose your virginity?
Starting point is 00:46:12 I was on the verge of 30 and Kelsey's like 29. I lost my virginity when I was 14. She's like, yeah, I just, I wanted to wait for the right person. So I ended up being a virgin for quite a bit of time. I mean, I was trying to have sex with this guy, but he kept on interrupting our activities to hand out flat whites to people. So it took a while. Bill really haven't had sex.
Starting point is 00:46:37 I was actually knocked up by a milk steamer. So weird. So that was her big plot on The Bachelor, that she was a virgin. And so then they asked Alicia if she hooked up with Gary, Joellen's husband. And Alicia's like, no, never, not once. Like, what is he a cracker? Like, what, you really think are hooked up with your husband, Joellen? Why would you ask me that?
Starting point is 00:47:01 She goes, why I didn't know? She's like, he's like a little brother. I would never. I've known Gary since I was three years old. I pray for him a communion. Who's my prayer partner? Rosie goes, okay, well, this is a good one. Did you have sex with the coach?
Starting point is 00:47:17 That's for me. I mean, oh, well, I don't know. Did you write this, Joellen? Joellen's like, I did. She goes, okay, there's a big rumor about me. I've never even met the coach. No, and this must be a very serious rumor because Bravo doesn't even show a headline or any.
Starting point is 00:47:33 Bravo doesn't even mention which coach this must be. But do we think this is like the coach of like the Celtics or something? or like, didn't they say? Did they not say? Well, I don't know. They were talking about sports on another show, I think.
Starting point is 00:47:49 Seahawks. Where are the Seahawks from? Some show was just talking about the Seahawks. Where's that? Seattle. So I wouldn't be here. Seattle Seahawks. I don't know,
Starting point is 00:47:57 but she's like, I've never had an affair with a basketball coach. I've never even met him. Okay, don't believe everything you see on Reddit. Give me a break. So now Joellen asked her own question. She's like, oh, okay, here's one. For me,
Starting point is 00:48:09 are you a swinger? Oh my God, I hear this question. I'm not a swinger. Gary and I are not swingers. A few of my friends are swingers. And, you know, who cares? Like, Rhode Island's a big swinging community, you know, to each their own. I don't give a shit what they do. Yeah, I don't care. I mean, I wish Gary would let me swing. We had a threesome. That's, that's fun. The lady left, she said, that's the biggest bitch in the state I fucked. It's so funny because when Joellen says, yeah, Rhode Island has a big swinging community. They cut right away to Liz looking down at her plate. like, don't look at me, which I thought that was very fun. I was like, I caught that editors.
Starting point is 00:48:44 They're all swinging and cheating. I love this show. And I don't believe Joe Ellen for one second. And I don't believe Rosie either. You fuck the coach and you're a swinger. Just going to come out there. We should also mention that the food does arrive somewhere in the middle of this. And I don't know what, I don't really know what, what's her face ordered.
Starting point is 00:49:06 Liz, did she order like a roast beef sandwich without the bread? because she just gets a pile, a mound, a mound of roast beef with a juanions. Yeah, she orders. She's like, could I have shaved roast beef? I don't want the bread. I don't like the bread. Just the roast beef. He just gets a pile of roast beef.
Starting point is 00:49:23 I've never seen that. So she denies being a swinger. And then Kelsey says, well, are you dating? Okay. So that's a question for me. Am I dating? Oh, gosh. This is a hot topic of conversation.
Starting point is 00:49:39 I'm very famous. You know, I'm not in a polygamous relationship, you guys. I've never been in a polygamous relationship. And obviously, I want to have kids and I want to be married. And this person that I've been with for 10 years will not give me that. So, yes, I'm dating someone else. Guys, I cannot be clearer about this. I'm absolutely not dating someone.
Starting point is 00:49:59 So in conclusion, I'm dating someone else. What don't you guys get? Get up my ass. And Rosie's like, wait. So now you do have two boyfriends? What? And Kelsey's like, okay. Hey, I'm cool, I'm happy, and I'm living my life.
Starting point is 00:50:11 Fine. Rosie goes, well, I did ask ChatGPT about this. Polygamy is if you're married. Polyamorous is when you're not. She has two boyfriends at one time. If this isn't polyamory, I don't know what is. So I love that Rosie acts like she just discovered a rare earth mineral. So Kelsey's like, the two people in my life are the most wonderful people.
Starting point is 00:50:33 Whether I end up with either one, I would be happy. At least she goes, as long as you're happy. Because you're a baby. Do you want a cracker? I got a lot. So, Joe Allen says, okay, I know that you guys have had questions. So Rosie, Alicia, anyone has questions about her? Ask her.
Starting point is 00:50:50 So Liz is like, so why did you bring it up in the first place, Joellen? You were the one who brought up, who brought up Kelsey being upset. And she's like, I did not bring up Kelsey. And they're like, yeah, you did. So we see the clip of her bringing it up. And Joellen's like, well, I was just saying she was going through a lot. And then Rosie says, yeah, but then we asked up follow-up questions, and you were like, we can't talk about it. So why bring it up if you don't want to answer follow-up questions?
Starting point is 00:51:15 I mean, geez. So basically, Joellen's like, look, if I brought it up, it wasn't intentional, like, it wasn't to get everyone to start talking. And once people did start talking about it, I shut it down. So there, that's all it is, right? And they're like, yeah, yeah. She was just saying, like, oh, hey, like, this is what she's been up to this week. Everything's fine. Everything's fine.
Starting point is 00:51:32 Like, okay. And Kelsey's like, see, I think, I think Joellen apologizing to me was like, everything. that I needed to hear. And I feel like what she's saying is genuine. So I hope that this is just kind of like a one and done. And that's it, which I think is the show's way of saying it's going to happen about 10 more times this season. Yeah. So Liz reads her question. And she's like, I know it's not too. What, what is this? And Alicia's like, I was there if I tried to write it. I'm sorry. I was doing it right. I almost died when I wrote it. I wrote it in the con. I ran someone over what will happen. That was a lot. It was very scary. But I had a
Starting point is 00:52:05 Newton so everything was okay. Could you translate this for me? I can't read it. She goes, I love you, but is the news true? Could I have a cracker? What do you mean in the news? I don't know what you're talking about the news. She goes, that you were having an affair, something like that. She goes, oh, so Ashley goes, wow, these women talk about affairs. They talk about cheating scandals. This is definitely supposed to be a salacious game. Like, you're supposed to air out our dirty laundry. This is like the weirdest thing. I'm like, shut up, Ashley. Honestly, I don't know why Ashley is here. I'm so far, I'm like, Every time she talks, I'm like, this is time that we could be spending with the other women.
Starting point is 00:52:39 I like it. I mean, I don't mind Ashley. Maybe it's because I know her from the other show, but I think it's funny that they just plopped Ashley in a real housewife show. And she's like, what the fuck is this? She's like, what is it? You know? Yeah, but that's a point. She's a new fish.
Starting point is 00:52:53 You know, you've got to have someone being like, these women are crazy. So Liz is like, okay, what you're asking me? Is it true for I'm having it to fear? No, it's not true. And Rosie's like, yeah, I've heard of a form. former romance with her best friend. Like, they were calling themselves each other 400 times a month or something. I mean, but, like, Liz is 56 years old.
Starting point is 00:53:14 Like, she's not really texting that much. Excuse you, Rosie. Old people text. Yeah, that's right. And if you're lucky, they'll text in all caps. Yeah, exactly. So Alicia's like, well, I'm just asking for everybody else. I know it's not true.
Starting point is 00:53:31 She's like, but we can pretend it is because it makes a great story, but now, listen, And my husband and I have a very close friend, Tina. He's my little brother. I love this person. We also had an unconventional friendship that people didn't understand. Was it completely right? No. Did we have a tour of the affair?
Starting point is 00:53:48 No. Did he stick his penis in my ear canal? You maybe no. But, you know, he means a lot to me. He means a lot to me. That's all it is. Yeah, she's like, we didn't have a tort affair. We didn't sleep together, but it means a lot to me.
Starting point is 00:54:02 Was it completely right? No. I'm like, what are you saying? Like, I don't understand what? You blew him. Did you guys murder someone together? Are you guys like in on some crime ring together? She goes, years ago, my husband took up sports fishing.
Starting point is 00:54:18 So Jerry was gone three weeks out of four. So when Jerry wasn't there, I'm always like, Goudino. And I know people are like, they have this affair. But like, Alicia should know this is all bullshit. She knows. She knows. She goes, other people don't know my story.
Starting point is 00:54:31 They want to, but time will tell. So Kelsey's like, wow, this was a great time, everybody. We cleared up so much. And Liz is like, you know, it's a scary day where people could take rumors and try and ruin lives over it. Like what Alicia said, that rumor, she was co-siding onto a narrative that she knew was false. Said, look, they look at me like I'm scary, but a couple of these girls at the table, they're capable of much more scary things that I am.
Starting point is 00:55:04 what's gonna happen with Liz of the Wobos? We will find that out on the next episode. But in the meantime, thanks everyone for being here. And then we'll be back at 5.30 p.m. West Coast time for a crappy hour where we will be talking about all the latest news in Bravo. And of course, there is a lot these days. So catch us there. And thanks for listening. And we'll talk to you on the next episode.
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