Watch What Crappens - #3498 The Valley S3E20 Part 2 Short Tempered

Episode Date: August 13, 2026

This is part 2 of 2The Valley continues its reunion as Danny finally has to answer for his behavior. It was hard to tell if he was sitting in the hot seat or a high chair. Also, Luke had predictably terrible answers to every question thrown his way. To watch this recap on video, listen to our bonus episodes, sign up for our free weekly newsletter and get ad free listening, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. Find bonus episodes at patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens and follow us on Instagram @watchwhatcrappens @ronniekaram @benmandelker Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello and welcome to watch our crap and the podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. This is part two of the recap. If you miss part one, go check out your podcast feed. It's right there. And without further ado, let's get right back into the recap. So now let's switch gears. Drake versus Kendrick to Tupac versus Biggie. Pop culture. I was like, are these all people Lala think she is sometimes?

Like, where is this going? I know these people. Pop culture is giving us some iconic rivals, and at this point, we can probably add the Bucos versus the comparinas to the list. So Jason, crotch from under your arm, says, you previously defended Jack's bad behavior, but are in an uproar over d'is. What's the difference? Well, number one, I never defended what Jacks did.

Like, his behavior, I mean, like, I took him to rehab, and after he got out, I was like, you're pretty much cured, and I think you're probably a, a really great guy now. And I took, you know, I took some time to see if he, he is going to make some changes because it's a big deal to go to rehab for 30 days. And I think that like, you know, when somebody does something like that, they deserve a little bit grace and like time to maybe see if they've changed things around, you know, pretty cool. Yeah, but Zach and I even for a second gave like a hint of sort of any friendship with Jacks. Brittany would be so pissed at us. And Zach goes, yeah, like, are you talking about it, Thanksgiving? And she's like, oh, he goes,

actually it was Christmas. It was Christmas you guys spent with Jacks. And Janet goes, yeah, it was not Thanksgiving. It was Christmas. Oh, much better. Okay. And before they obfuscate what's happening here, the accusation is that you guys are such fucking hypocrites about Danny being a disgusting alcoholic, which, by the way, you've been right about. And Danny is a disgusting man who acts terribly when he's drunk. But then you're supporting someone who, was literally abusing your friend drunkenly on camera like on the ring cameras so this slippery shit of jacks and jason is i think pretty hypocritical and i'm glad it's being called yeah i think it's i agree i think it's gross um i we never i never understood why jason was so friendly with jacks even before the rehab thing i feel like jason i like jason actually i do like jason and i do like jason and And I feel like he seems like a smart guy, but I never understood why he gave Jacks passes. I thought that was like a failing on his part. And so, but now it's interesting because-

I think he likes Jacks because he's kind of a dorky guy. And Zach, I mean, Jacks is a cool guy. I mean, he's a disgusting guy, but he was like the star of Vanderpump rules and, you know, he's got all this going on. And especially the way Jacks talks, God knows what he's telling Jason he's got going on. And Jason just likes being part of the cool kids club. I know. that's what's so funny about jason is that like he presents almost like he's like the star quarterback he's like this tall handsome successful smart guy he's got like everything going on but his energies you can see

he was actually sort of like nerdy like he's like he's kind of like just a big hot nerd and jacks is actually like the jock guy he's like the popular guy in school and i think that jason was just like drawn to that i don't know like that's how it seems from the outside um but what's interesting here is that the conversation well that's both of them in that couple know because he's like that with Jacks and then Janet's like kind of the follower of Sheena and you know all the other people who were stars on TV that she couldn't wait to meet so they're kind of like fans I guess as a couple and they wanted to keep that going because they didn't know jacks wasn't going to come back they didn't you know no one knew that jacks wasn't going to be back so just got to kiss the ass to make sure

that he's not coming after you on the show next year and you're going to still be friends with jacks well um what's interesting is that this was like a moment where I thought there was going to be a bit more grilling on Janet and Jason about their relationship with Jacks. And it actually became more about like, hey, it's not fair because if, hey, like Kristen's saying, if I said anything nice to Jacks or if Zach said anything nice to Jacks, Brittany, you'd have, you'd have been furious at us. But then Jacks fully goes over to their place for Christmas and you weren't mad about it. Like, that's not fair.

So it became like an issue about Brittany. And I thought that was like, uh, this doesn't feel like it's, that's. should be the primary concern here, right? But they decided to go down this path anyway. And so Brittany is like, well, I just like the way that Jason was handling it. And if you guys ever talked to him, like, even after he came out and you were like, nice to him at first, I wouldn't be mad. I wouldn't be mad if you'd talk to Jackson first.

And he was not, because, you know, it just came out real. I wouldn't be mad at all. Yeah, right. And she goes, well, you talk to Jack, Kristen, when, you know, when he got out and I wouldn't mad about it. And Chris goes, wait a minute. you knew exactly what I was doing. I think Kristen was saying, you know I was talking to him to pump him for information for you.

Why are you bringing that up? That's kind of the vibe I got because she was like, you know I was talking to him, Brittany. And she goes, right, but I'm just saying I wasn't mad or anything. And so Zach's like, yeah, you guys having, oh, go ahead, sorry. I just want to interrupt because I just had a thought that I think it's actually pretty important, which is that I think when Jason says, like, look, when someone gets out of rehab, you owe them some grace to see if they've changed. I think that's 100% correct, right?

Like, you have to like, be like, okay, they put in work, they put an effort. Let's see how this works out. Like, let's not be, let's be open-minded. But, like, let's not also forget that while Jacks was in, quote, unquote, rehab, he was sending Britney vicious text messages the entire time to the point where she was moved to actually get a divorce while he was in rehab. And he knew that was happening. So that does kind of undermine his position of like, well, you know, I was.

was I just like I just picked him up from rehab and I just want I want to see you know give him some grace to see if maybe you changed it's like you know he didn't change well yeah that's kind of that's what I'm saying and I agree with you and that's why I'm saying it's not just that the drunken rehab it's the abusing his wife like he was throwing her around he threw her into the bushes he threw her a computer across the room and I don't know in front of the kid it's really bad stuff that whether jacks went to rehab or not he's still being abusive towards his wife and you know that and this woman is your friend and then you're still going to invite him over to Christmas to be nice. Fuck him off. I can't believe they get away with that shit. There's such

fucking hypocrites, both of them. And that doesn't mean that Danny didn't deserve to be told off or anything else. Danny will be getting his today as well. But Janet and Jason are huge fucking hypocrites. It makes me crazy. And then she does the whole, well, I asked Brittany if I could do it because my answer was going to be no. But then Brittany said it would actually help her because it would take a load off of her not having to think about where Jackson is going to be on the holidays. So I did it for Brittany. I did it. I'm a good person. That's why I did it.

No, you had her abuser into your home at Christmas. What are you thinking? I would never. Yeah, I think that was a lapse in judgment. I mean, the whole thing was like a little weird to me about, about Brittany saying like it actually made my life easier for them to take on Jacks because that way Jacks wouldn't be. like wouldn't be blowing up my phone i mean the whole thing is like a little weird i don't know it's actually so there's so many issues going on in terms of like jackson i don't know i just i don't know i feel bad that britt had to like had to enlist people to distract jacks that way she could have

some peace on the holidays well she's also she's this is also where she's like well you know log i did come help me she's doing this thing with her hands where she's making like crazy news person hands and Kristen's like look at her hands look at her hands look at brittany's hands because i think that's her tell like she's clearly just foolish it because this show is also about being on teams so brittany's like no you know i'm team i'm staying solid with janet and jason like you're not coming from my alliance right now i think there probably what there there probably was an element of like oh we've been canceled by the the audience. Jack's been canceled. Like, we understand, like, like, I wonder if they thought,

like, oh, Jacks is a little misunderstood the way we feel like we're misunderstood. So they were more open to him in that way, you know, because I'm just trying to imagine, you know, I'm trying to imagine. I really do actually have a hard time believing that, like, they would embrace Jackson in that way like i really do and so it's like it's so bizarre to me that they they had him over for for christmas it really really is but i can imagine there's probably something about like the the weird bond that we see later this episode of being canceled by the audience or just receiving so much audience hate that like you maybe gravitate towards other people who've been through it before it's so weird well maybe but then janet would be best friends with christin you know what i mean sure yeah so i don't

though, but Danny was following Jacks around all last year, being quote unquote supportive. And Janet wasn't. You know, Janet was a little more like, gross, like fuck Jacks. You know, she was like kind of helping Brittany through that. So I'll give her credit for that. But yeah, Jason is just an ass kisser. I think this is like a popular guy and they don't know if he's going to be back on the show or not. And they don't want to fuck themselves over on the show.

I think they're thirsty, you know, kind of hangers on. Um, so personally, not to, you know, not to put it too lightly. Guys made me a coffee cake. You better tread lightly. That's just the vibe I've always, you know, gotten from the, but the funny part is that Jason, strangely enough, despite all this, I do think he's the best, he's the best husband of this entire group because I mean, quite frankly, like quite frankly, like, quite frankly, like, the, this whole thing with having.

jacks over for christmas to me i i don't get it i don't understand it um but he's the only one who actually treats his spouse with kindness and support and sticks up for her no matter what yeah no matter what and he will go have private lunches with whoever he needs to do it he'll do i mean he'll do whatever i think he's a very good partner too um i just don't but this was a shitty but i'll give him credit for the good marriage for sure yeah i I think this was a shitty part of, this is a shitty part of his journey. Where are we? Danny Bucco time.

Is it Bucco time? Yeah, let's skip to Danny because that was a lot. So Andy's like, okay, let's get back to the Bucos and the Copernas. Danny, Jason tried apologizing to you at the cigar lounge. You're not having it. What could he have said that would have made you more open to moving forward? I'm sorry. That's what he could have said.

I'm sorry. Jason's like, I'm not going to sit here and say, I'm sorry for everything. I mean, because I'm like not sorry for everything. Like, I don't know, I don't know everything. Like, I don't think everything is something that I have to apologize for. I'm like the, I'm not the one who did things. I wish I didn't call you a clown and a douche. And I don't plan to do that again today.

And I'm sorry that I lost my temper on you then. But like, what else I'm sorry for? By the way, I think it's just so funny that like Jason last year at the reunion saying, you're a clown is like this like horrific. Like, oh my God, look how Jason just lost his temper. He lost the temper and said the seawart. Oh, he said cut baddest. No, he said clown.

I demand an apology. Well, they have to make it about that because for whatever reason, no one will say the word sexual assault this season. Have you noticed? We have not heard it at all. Because it won't say it. And it keeps coming up and then he keeps stopping himself. So I don't know if they've made it like,

guy just got too dark or guys, Danny will walk off the stage and refuse to feel. I don't know what it is. No, it's because last season, this is what got Janet the most in trouble is that she said sexual assault on that boat. And then cue all the comments that were like, Janet is the exact sort of person that lands someone in jail. Jana is the person who says sexual assault. And then all of a sudden, like someone's entire life is when she's dangerous. She's a Karen. So no one wants to touch it because no one wants to be accused of that.

So everyone's like. Right. But that's what happens. And that's what was said. You know, Danny did get drunk and grab the ass and be like, get me a get daddy drink, honey. And then like rub Michelle's leg. And Janet maybe took it too far saying that. But even at the reunion last year, all the people who hated Janet were like, well, yeah, it was technically sexual assault.

But, but, but, but. But you know what though? I think actually. It's already been the plot. So you don't have to start saying clown and using all this other language. Just say it with your chest, people. I mean, that's what it's about. But you know, though, it's actually smart not to say it.

And the reason why is because then it becomes a discussion of like, is it sexual assault? Is it not sexual assault? What does this do to his future? It's such a hard word. It's like it's a, it's a heavy phrase that can ruin someone's reputation. Like it's like we're not actually talking about that right now specifically. Like it's, it's, it's ancillary, but it's not what the primary thing is. So it's like, let's just keep it like focused on what it is.

And you're correct. I think you're absolutely correct what you're saying. And that's why it's so stupid that Danny kept bringing it up every single episode. You're so worried it's going to ruin your reputation and your children and you're this and you're that that you're going to sob about for the next hour. But then you made it a point every single episode to demand apology for somebody calling you out on doing it. You idiot. Like, what is what do you think? What do you think they're going to talk about?

You brought it up every episode. Quite frankly, I still believe that Danny and Nia, they're the ones who had the unforced errors last season and obviously this season because he wasn't the wrong. and he had actually what seemed to be a pretty good apology to Jasmine that was heartfelt and then it just became a thing of like I've already apologized and like how dare you say something like that about Danny?

It just became about like protecting Danny and Danny was the one who needed the most protection in this moment and that started last season whether you felt however you felt about the whole situation last season and Janet yada yada was she being alarmist was she not whatever like the truth is that Danny did

something wrong and it really did become about like don't try like don't do this to Danny don't say these things about Danny and it's like that's that's where that's where you lost that's what they lost the thread because it should never that that could have then this would have been dead this would have been dead it would have been like I was like I was drunk I didn't mean to do that I'm so sorry and I'm going to work to like build up our friendship and then it just would have been just another one of these little storylines and then they move forward yeah but nope he had to come back every episode demanding some kind of an apology you idiot now you've kept it alive

for another year and the tides have turned it's time for a commercial it's time for a crap and's commercial so um Danny is saying well your wife said those words then you perpetuated it and then you brought it up every episode this year idiot and then Andy's Andy's like uh Danny how did it feel to see janica buried to Charles Manson he's like he's like that was absolutely ridiculous. And it's like, um, I was not comparing him to Charles Manson. I was just saying just because I didn't see something with my own eyes does not mean a lot of people weren't serial killed. Now, that's exactly what you did.

You did exactly what Jack did last season. I'm not a serial killer. I may be an out of work actor, but I'm not a serial killer too. And he's like such a literalist. He really thinks that he's being called a serial killer. And he's like, well, do I actually go bail to you? And Janet said it to like, I said to say it in the room, okay? And Jackson tried to say like, like,

don't spin it around, don't spin around. I'm not, I'm not a serial killer. I'm not a sociopath. Are you kidding? Can you believe they're calling me a serial killer? And I love that Janet finally has to be like, okay, what I should have said is just like, just because it didn't happen to me,

doesn't mean I can't be affected by it. Knowing that you put your hands on somebody made me very uncomfortable with you moving forward, especially while you were still drinking. He's like unable to deal with a metaphor. Yeah. Well, that was a pretty. There was a funny-ass metaphor.

I mean, Charles Manson metaphor, but for him to be back. No, but she had to. She had to go to that extreme because don't forget, she was trying to explain it to Luke. And Luke is like, I think you should lay off him. And she's like, no, well, you don't understand. Like, you know, he's bothering me. And Luke kept on pressing it. And finally she was like, I don't have to be Charles.

i don't have to be charles manza to know what i i don't have to know charles manson to know that what he did was wrong like she's like i like i need to use hyperbole here to get through your dumb skull luke and then of course it's like wow she called dania serial killer it's like oh god please yeah she didn't call danny a serial killer but she is it's just janet she's gonna go the most extreme in every situation you know and and they all do by the way it's reality by the way um it was a funny ass moment um so janet's um yeah i didn't i just it wasn't horrible i mean i can understand why he's mad i'm just not you know i love you i just don't agree it was great but still fuck danny the most in this situation and she's like well um oh so nia comes in she goes

well that would have been fine if you said it like that janet but you know you're led to have feelings because of the things that you shared that we found out about and I'm so sorry about that absolutely but it's more the malicious intent of your worst to try to hurt him yeah you know what last season I didn't have many moments where I was drunk or I had too many drink I mean Seth Rogen and she even said on your show he said hey who's this dark side Danny I don't even see this dark side Danny I mean you're Shat Rogen and Lala's like well if Seth Rogen says it I guess it must be trusk I'm assuming you saw the comment that Seth Rogen made recently. Yes.

It was like, it was of this clip and he just commented under and he's like, to be clear, I find his behavior unacceptable. I find his behavior unacceptable. That was my first attempt ever doing a Seth Rogen impersonation. So, uh, okay, well, Danny and Neo we're juggling the chaos of four under four. Oh, for fuck's sake, here we go. Let's go again. Another baby.

How are you guys feeling? Now Adelaide is just over a year old. Are you still feeling a lament? Why did they, how did they not even work in Adelaide's lament in there? So Nia is like, it's gotten a lot better. And a person develop a gold. Yes. It's gotten a lot better.

And we've also lamented a lot of support in our life. Now we have an O-Pair. So we have someone. You know that Dan is like, oh, yeah, O-Pair, yeah. Daddy likes no pair. Daniel. Or does I like to call her? Ho peach.

Tuts. Oh, for a while, we were not able to do that because I was solely focused on the kids. And like everything else is like, it's just like we were like two ships in the night. We weren't able to infest it ourselves. All right. Well, in a private moment at home, you expressed to Danny how overwhelmed and close to burnout you were. How does he normally support you in those situations? Oh, this answer.

Well, you know, he's really supportive of me. Like whenever I'm in a bad mood, he's like, wow, Nia, maybe you need to exercise more, have less calories or do more squats or something. You know, it's very, very supportive. She didn't literally say that, but she was like, you know, he makes sure that I exercise and that I eat the right things. And I was like, oh, of course he does. You know what would make you feel better? Crunches. She should do.

I actually believe it or not, I didn't, this didn't hit me like terribly. To me, I sort of heard it as like, like, maybe we need to do something to be active. Maybe you're feeling down. Let's get out of the house. Let's move around. Let's have like a nice meal. Or maybe you need something to feel good about yourself or your body. Because that was an issue that she had last year was her body.

So I actually believe it or not was. like I was not offended here by that. I'm just sort of generally offended by him, but believe or not, this didn't trigger me. Yeah, I read it as like exercise and lose some weight, you'll feel better. And listen, very welcome. Any weight I've been, and I've been 200 pounds more than this, multiple times in my life, I will tell my friends, I feel fat. And if one of them tells me, you know what you should do, eat better and exercise. I'm like, fuck that friend. I never want to hang out with them again. Like, what kind of answer is that? So Andy's like, also there were this little moment you were trying to finish eating and you needed a little support.

And he was like, ha, ha, that was funny. And Danny seemed really bothered by the suggestion that he would help you in those moments. And he just really came off like a dick. He's like, 100%. I was right in that moment. 100%. I was totally right. I love how Andy is. So he does not give a shit with these casts. You know, like the non-housewives cast. He's like, you're really a dick. All right. What do we think about that?

So Danny pretends that he's like totally taking accountability. And then Nia says they started intense couples therapy before the show started. And they'd been in a place where they're irritable and snappy with each other. And usually if we have a window, like we can pull it. back really quick. I'm always like, wait, hold on. Hold on. Can I say something, though? Because I understand, because I have two kids, too. And I can't even imagine having like four. Like I get it's exhausting. But watching that, Nias, you are in this completely solo. And it did feel like, oh my God, this is the norm for them. And the way you handled it, Danny, like I wanted to praise you. Or sorry, the way you handled Danny, I wanted to praise you. But I also wanted to jump through the fucking TV and Tupac your ass. Okay. I wanted to deck him for use.

So Andy's like, okay, great, thanks, Lala. So what was your reaction when you saw that? And Danny goes, me? I mean, I was a complete nightmare going into that weekend. Again, it is what it is. You know, I was all up, I was up all night with a screaming toddler. And by a screaming toddler, I mean a nice can of white claw in the garage. And in the crib with her and going on no sleep.

And had a lot of stress and anxiety about going. on that trip with the comparinus is basically janin's fault and you know they were going to be there and knowing that there was a lot of conflict and unfortunately i was snappy and i took it out on the person that i love the most which is of course a can of slits and i really wish i could have taken those things back and sheen i'm like thank you for your very well-prepared little monologue there blaming the baby baby and the caparinas yes uh yeah janet janet jane and Jason are both like, oh, he's talking about us. He's talking about us.

They're whispering at each other, but they're also making big ham. We see you guys. Okay, we know. And so Andy's like, you were annoyed because you wanted the babysitter helping more. Do you usually not help put the baby down? I'm a dad now. And Danny's like, well, I think Neil would agree. I usually go above and beyond.

All right, Nia, Nia, Nia. And she's like, yeah, he's the most involved. you know, I don't even like putting the baby down for a nap. He puts the baby down for a nap. What about that, everybody? Yeah, I change all the diapers. I get up two to three times a month and people say I don't do know how to swaddle, but I watch near swaddle all the time and I'm like,

I could probably do that someday. So like, I don't know what people are talking about. Yeah, I don't know that the argument has ever been from the audience. I haven't read it, that he's a bad dad. I don't get the vibe that he's a bad dad. It's that you treat your wife abysmally on TV while she's trying to be a good mother. Yeah, well, I think there are a lot of people who feel like Dan, like, Nia has to do it all and Danny does nothing. And like, that definitely seemed to come off this way.

I mean, in the seasons past, he seemed to be actually a bit more hands-on. And I'm not saying that he's not hands-on now. But he definitely was presented more as someone who's making Nia do it all. And I don't know. I kind of, I do feel like he's, he probably is hands-on. to an extent, but I do think that Nia is doing most of the work. Like, he definitely seems like he requires like a good amount of attention. Like he will, he will help out, he will do some help, but with the kids, but then he's like, and now I need you to help me. Like I now I need a

right. Ultimately, he's like, but I'm the man in this relationship and you're supposed to be taken care of me as well. Like when he got his, uh, when he got snipped or whatever and he's like, how am I supposed to be stuck here with the kids? I need to be taken care of right now. And then he's like, why would the audience think that I'm not there as much for my kids as near is? Because of scenes that you did, sir. So basically he's saying, look, we had a sitter. So I thought, you know, we need the sitter. So why aren't we using the sitter?

But, you know, with sleep deprivation and thinking, you know, when she's telling me to do this or if I could do this, when I'm like, well, we have a sitter, she could put her down. Like it played in the house feeling. But watching it back is horrifying, you know. And I had kind of spoken the looks I was given. You know, again, Danny, if it was one time, but it was the San Diego trip nonstop. It was the other trip, nonstop. It's always. It seems like always.

And I like, well, we're not here yet, but I like when Andy was like, yeah, it seems like if you'll talk that way on camera, like, what's the, how are you talking to her in private? You know? Yeah. But right now, he's saying, Kristen, what was? was your reaction. And here's Kristen for her big rehearsed. Oh, I just have to say, I was horrified when I saw how Danny treated Nia on TV. I had no idea. Yes, you did. And you've been on the after show standing up for his ass to you. So stop pretending you suddenly care, Kristen. It really bummed me out. Yeah. So then this is where Andy is like, yeah, like, I guess the concern

is that is this the way you guys act when no one's around? And Lala's like, yeah, I think like we saw into the window and you forgot to close the blinds. because you seem like very comfortable speaking to her that way and you seem really to know how to deal with it and if like this were out of character i think it would have been like what the fuck is going on and jan's like yeah we like jason we never spoke to each other like that ever he's like yeah totally not so then um uh la la la la it's actually funny because this is a moment when i really want to hear from them about like is this what happens between closed doors but we're getting a lot of lala right now yeah it's another one of those like lala you're not even on the the show, but you're right as well. So I don't know. It's good to see someone calling Danny out with his, you know, bullshit like, well, sorry, we have a baby. What's the big deal? It was bad, though. I'm not saying it wasn't bad. So it is good having her there calling him out. But yeah, I feel the same way. Like what? So then he's like, listen, you don't even go here. We've been about for 10 years. We have four kids. Far into four. We have moments that aren't

the best where I've said things I've never said before and she says things that she's never thought she's saying before and so like when you're sleep deprived you just have moments so you see it's not a problem with my personality it's a problem with my sleeping on account of the kids and also thinking about the comparoners it's not about having it's not about making excuses it's about having excuses you understand and jasmine is sick of it she's been like muttering through this whole monologue and she's like oh god I can't put the kids again here we go with the kids Okay, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, I'm so sorry, but I'm about to lose my mind over here because, like, this whole season, like, everybody's like, like, not everybody, just you, but everybody with the kid things. Like, I have kids, I have sleep deprived, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And so all the parents are like, how dare you. No, it's not all the parents.

You do not get to say that when you are not a parent. Well, the parents on that side of the couch. It's just, it's just, it's just, Lisa, yeah, are like, yeah. Because everyone else there is a parent, you know, Michelle, Jessie, Lacey. Yeah, you're right. Brittany, Janet, Jason, Andy, people behind the cameras. Everyone there was a parent and no one is like, oh, Jasmine, you're overstepping. Everyone's just sitting there like, mm-hmm, like, yep. That's just that. So the parents on that side of the couch.

So those four, Kristen, Danny, me. The shitty. I must have the shitty parents. Not that they're shitty parents, but meaning that they're the shitty. The shitty couples right now. Yeah, like, how dare you don't have a baby? You can't say anything like that. And she's like, well, I'm just like, yeah.

I mean, I know there's struggles and stuff, but like, I can't see because of a kid. And I did this. And I drink too much because of my kids. And I take crits inside because of my kids. I didn't, don't say that. I didn't say that. She goes, I'm being dramatic, Danny, okay? And he goes, yeah, you are.

She's why I'm just saying it's like how it's coming off. So, again, she doesn't really explain herself that well. But it's like, every thing we're being called out for your excuse is that you have a kid. And at some point, you just have to say I was shitting. and I need to learn to do better. And that's it. And not blame everything on being a parent. It's annoying.

Again, stop using your kids as human shields. If Lala had said that, I think they would have had a different reaction. And the fact that Jasmine said it, and like all four of them at once just like went right at her. I don't know. That also made me feel a little uncomfortable. So Andy is like, he's like,

well, welcome back to season three for all a reunion. Luke, we invited you and Kristen to appear on Watch Happens Live. together who guess what Luke by the way you thought we're on Danny we're back to you so we invited you on watch what happens live together a few weeks ago and you told my producers that you would only come if christin was not involved that you needed a break oh my god oh yeah back to you look Luke you are my father and i am your father i should say you're not my father i'm confused star Wars. Am I right? I am your father, Luke, and your father is telling you what the fuck is going on with you? Another movie I didn't get to see because Kristen's controlled my whole fucking line.

Oh, God, when he asked that, I just screamed at the TV. Are you fucking kidding me? You said you go do watch what happens live without Kristen because you're sick of her? What the fuck? And Kristen's like, yeah, Luke, go and say. And so then they kind of change this around. And so Kristen starts trying to explain again. It's like, Well, I was asked to do it. Our nanny was out of town. So I said, we'll have to bring Kaya. And he said, okay, maybe my mom can come take care of Kaya. And so I was looking for flights for his mom so she can be with Kaya. And so do you want to say what you really said, Luke? And he's like, well, do you want to say the part where you said you were just going to be in

the room the entire time? We can't even do anything. And I'm like, that sounds miserable. And going across the country to change our sleep schedule for less than 48 hours, Luke, you told watch what happens live you wanted to go without Kristen so you can get a break from her stop with nothing to do with the baby stop it oh this was that was shitty he's like I mean sometimes you need space and honestly like jumping over three time zones to like not even get adjusted and jump back we had a week to fought with the baby it just wasn't gonna oh god I don't know okay here's what I'm gonna say as someone who does not have a child uh I mean there's a I would say there's a 75% chance I'm wrong on this, but I'm going to tell you what it always feels like to us

childless people. Sometimes I feel like when I try to make a plan with someone who has a child and they say, well, the baby's sleep schedule and we really don't want to get them out of whack da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. Sometimes I feel like you're, it's like the equivalent of saying I have to wash my hair that night. Like I sometimes I feel like, is this really true? Are you really big? Is this like, I believe that, you. you know kids need a sleep schedule i believe that 100% but i also often feel like i'm on the receiving end of that excuse so many times that i'm like is this true is this true i'm like as the like oh we're not going to do a single thing because the baby's sleep schedule is this really yeah i know

i know i know i know parents will get mad at me but i'm saying as someone doesn't have kids that's how it always feels like it literally always feels like and i think the going across the you know, at a time zone that's three hours different. I mean, I see what he's saying as far as that can be a mind fuck. But the thing that's so infuriating is just like, okay, I'll just go and Kristen can stay home with the baby. It's like, no. No one wants you, Luke. No one is like, wow, watch what happens live.

That's going to be a better show with Luke. You've got the personality of a broken pencil. Okay. Nobody wants you. They're there. You're there because of Kristen. So to be like, Kristen can say. And I'll just go party with everybody in New York and go to Soho Club with the guys and do all this, which you know is what he's thinking.

And Kristen was probably like, yeah, we'll get your mom, but I don't want you going out and getting shit-faced all night. And I can't even have fun on my trip. This is just gross. You're here because of Kristen. And don't ever tell yourself otherwise, please. Yeah. And also, by the way, his response to Watcher Happens Live was not, I can come, but Kristen will have to stay back with the baby because we don't want to mess up the baby's sleep schedule. response was I'll come only if Kristen's not involved right yeah so this guy's just a

different of shit it's it's hard watching him because he's such a piece of shit that he can't even learn to fake it commercials here comes one right now ronnie quick question a rough a rough estimate how many like I just want a ballpark park number how many DMs do you think I'm going to get from parents who are going to be like you don't understand they babies need to have a sleep schedule how many do you think i'm going to get i'm going to say if it makes it if it makes it fair we're both going to be in trouble today so just let it wash what are you going to be in trouble for i don't know i've been bashing babies the whole time i don't know i don't want to list them because then if they slid through people you know oh then you don't want ears and right out of them

i don't i don't need people i don't need to remind people why to be mad at me though i will say this People can save their DMs because if you DM me and say, no, it really is true. Like, if you mess up a baby sleep schedule, it like fucks you up for an entire week. I accept it. I accept it. I accept it. You don't even have to DM me. I fully accept it.

I'm not going to be able to put it back. I'm not going to fight. I know it's true. I'm just saying, every time, you know, with my name. Every time I try to like do something. I just feel like, I'll be like, do you got to get lunch, want the baby? I just can't mess with the baby's sleep schedule. Like, really?

Lunchtime. That's the thing. It changes. You know, people know how much a baby changes a couple, but they don't think about me in the... Like, you're not thinking about how much it's changing my schedule. It's just tough. It's tough for us. Yeah, friends got to get on the baby schedule.

And now I know it. You know, my friends with babies and my close loved ones with babies, I know the schedule. I know when we can go out and do shit. And frankly, now that I'm getting older, it's really matching an old man schedule. too because I'm like it's dark get that baby in bed because and by baby I mean me goodbye goodbye baby you know I'm going to start doing like if I'm going to start also pulling the schedule card the sleep the sleep schedule card like hey do you want to hang out but we can only hang out like at 10 a.m on Saturday like I'm so sorry that's going to mess up my doing something else schedule so

um yeah you have a different time you have that with board games or with, you know, you're involved at a lot of things. You can't just hang out at any time. And board games are my babies. So your baby. Yeah, I realize. So just. And anyway, it's not even about the babies or when they sleep.

Nobody gives a fuck. It's the point that they're using them as an excuse and to show for their bad behavior. So, um, Andy is like, okay, I need to play devil's advocate. Why don't you guys just have five nannies? Everybody needs five nannies. Come on. You need a backup nanny. Back a nanny.

I know. And they're like, okay, we'll get a backup. Andy, this is the cast of the Valley. They barely had, look at what Brittany is. Brittany is wearing a fast food wrapper, like as a dress. You don't pay these people enough to have five nannies? Stop it. They can't.

They can't. All right, Chris. So, okay, so at dinner, the first night of San Diego, Kristen, you were feeling like Luke wanted to leave and he was trying to come for you and you asked him if he was always saying that because he was on microphone. Was he more supportive view on camera than off? And just like, well, around that time I felt like that. Yeah, but I wouldn't say it was the camera. It was just that it was on and off and like some days he was super sweet.

And then other days he was barely speaking. And like in that moment, I was like, are you being for real? Like, are you being this sweet to me right now? Is this real? It's like, okay, cool. So he sucks. So basically your husband's an asshole. Then he was nice to you on camera.

And you were like, are you really being? nice to me or is it because they're cameras here? Just say yes, Kristen. So then we get to Danny. And Danny is asked if he felt more for Janet because Janet has such a hate campaign against her on TV

and now he's experienced it. Does he feel any kind of empathy, basically? And he's like, well, those were completely different situations. And Lala's like, the answer should be just yes. Yes, that's it.

And he's like, excuse me, chase the Pete. I didn't talk the whole first half of this day. Okay, let me talk now. But like it's not like they're different. Of course, they're different. Of course. Okay, well, I was going to listen. I was going to go into a yes and then an apology.

And then, I don't know, maybe a monologue for my favorite Marvel Cinematic Universe feature film. But I guess I can't do that. You open your mouth every time I talk. She goes, well, I do talk a lot. And you're like, no, kidding, Jesus de Pede, Mary and Joseph, Jehoshaphat, whoosh, whoa. And they're like, okay, Danny, just make your point, please. And he's like, well, I never experienced it in my life.

I was told to kill my, okay, I don't want to read this in a voice. He says, I was told to kill myself so that my wife and my kids could have a better life. Who said that? What the fuck is wrong with people? Yeah, that's just awful. people i mean danny sucks but like let's let's also like get a grip and like let's just keep it to snarky comments well it's not like wish death upon him it's not that serious that's crazy people stop stop it get help so uh he's saying he cried about it and he didn't want to get out of bed and so he

does want to apologize to janet for all the stuff she experienced with that and him being in a place at the time of liking or reposting and doing things like that he also apologizes and he doesn't even say but i have a baby which is impressive it's the first time today so this was like the most emotionally honest moment amongst the entire cast because then they all start crying because half of them have been in a place where the audience has come at them with pitchforks i mean christin lala um just others they're all just like crying and uh they all know what it's like to have just pure hate from the internet coming their way. So Andy's like, well, la, what bothered you the most hearing the way Danny was speaking to

Nia while everyone was prepping for the pageant? And she's like, his tonsk. And by the way, I did not, you know, I did walk up and I said, are you trying to be funny and be in character? Because, like, we know you love a good character. I mean, it's not a funny character, but you love a good character. And are you, like, trying to be a dick? And he was like, no, I'm in character.

But then, like, when I left, it was, like, clear that, like, Neil was, like, uncomfortable. And I just like, you know, he felt like he wasn't listening to her. So of course, I stepped in. So Danny asks, or Andy asks Danny if he would have reacted to any of the men the same way that he reacted to Lala. And he's like, no, I wouldn't have. It's like, why? Because I have penises. Why else?

She was triggered. Farks to Marks. It's like, all right. But he says, he's like, I don't know Lala. So I don't like, someone just. coming in and weighing in. I don't know her. And Kristen's like, well, what if I did it? He's like, yeah. I mean, if you came in, I feel like I would have 100% have a different reaction. We've been like, look, there's a crazy lady trying to talk to me.

Kristen's like, yeah, Kristen jumping into help. Kristen jumping into help because obviously what Andy was saying was it because it was a woman that you were reacting like that? And he's like, yes. So Kristen's like, let me help you rephrase that. It would have been okay if it was a woman, just not her, right? And he's like, yeah. So she says, you know, but then Kristen adds, oh, but I was horrified. I want everybody to know, watching it on TV, horrified, you know. And so Danny's like, well, obviously, I was in the wrong.

But, you know, he's asking the question. If someone else came in instead of the way you had, I would have had a different reaction. It's just, I'm in the wrong 100%. Okay, over and over. Monster, terrible. Sorry about your fridge, Zach. But still, you all get it, right? I should never talk to my wife that way.

Well, Michelle, you points out that everyone is afraid to say something critical of Danny and Mia because of what happened to Janet. And so, you know, because she showed her opinion and got a lot of blowback. So who here do you think has more to say but isn't speaking up? But she's like, well, I think at one point Jasmine in Mexico was talking about it. And Brittany and Jason and Janet and like everyone. And I just think in general, throughout different situations with people. You know, I was trying to be a middle person and resolve this situation because everyone was talking about it. And I was just trying to help.

And so, Jasmine's like, well, this is where it gets confusing. And Dan's like, yeah, it was really confusing, you know, because in one half, we're saying one thing and the other half or saying another. And Lala's like, can I say something about that, though? By all means, Lala, take the floor again. I actually understand Danny's confusion in this because to see a group of people who go to him and have a problem with his behavior when he's drinking it and they say no drink as much as you want. Like, no, you can't because he become unpredictable. And by the way, many people do. Like many people who are totally normal, you know, who are not like me, who's like in a program.

So like, you know, to have like this group saying like that saying this, it was just confusing. So I guess that. Okay, Danny, now do you want to say why you were confused? Because I think I just said it for use. Yeah, I mean, on one hand, you're not supposed to tell other people they're an alcoholic, right? Like, that's up to them to go on their own journey. But at the same time, when you're acting like a drunk idiot every time, people have the right to say you're acting like an idiot and we don't want to hang out with you, you know? Yeah.

But God damn, this conversation, because he still doesn't get it. He's just looking like, what? Some people say I can drink. And some people say I can't. What am I supposed to do? Well, hopefully you've seen yourself on camera. and you know that you're a drunk idiot and you'll stop it, but he doesn't. So Jasmine's trying to explain like, you're trying to make it in the gay bar about shaking your hips.

Nobody cared about shaking your hips, but you were going to every single person making a huge deal. By the way, fall down drunk that day. He was miserable that night in Mexico at the gay bar. And he's like, yeah, well, that was knee. I said to not shake my hips, you know. She was trying, you know, but it just got me mad. And he's like, and, you know, I was like, I can't dance. I can't even save my hips.

This is ridiculous. And they're like, no, we don't up the stairs by a go go boy. To strap. Yeah. And they're like, no, we don't care about your hips. Do your hips just like, just be a better drinker, you know. And he's like, so Andy's like, well, it doesn't make me wonder. What would have happened if you'd not?

Stop in drinking in those situations. Yeah. It's like, you know, you're like, you know, this is. And to talk. I'm sorry. Josh, go ahead. Go ahead, fair Ronnie. No, I'm so sorry.

I didn't, I just thought you were going to stop. You didn't stop. You're like a baby. I'm just like me drinking. I don't stop. I don't stop. I thought this was just so funny because Andy's like, okay, here's your opportunity to have your special moment

about your drinking problem. Danny, let's open the floor to Danny guys. guys is going to come clean. We're all going to cry and wrap up this episode. Danny's like, well, you know, I, uh, I've been thinking a lot since rapping eight months ago. And, uh, I've never, I want everyone to know. I've never, I thought he was going to say, I haven't had a drink since then or, or, you know, like I saw what I was. I stopped drinking. He goes, well, I have never been that intoxicated since. And, and, you know, like, I saw what I was. I was. I stopped drinking. He goes, Well, I have never been that intoxicated since.

And I started cracking out because like, come on. And since then, I've been in therapy. And I really looked at my doctor, Grey Goose, and I looked at my relationship with alcohol. And I said, God, this is a strong relationship. And so I've been working and making my stronger self-control. Now you're in trouble as far as this alcohol. conversation goes because you can't even say I'm not drinking you're like I've just not that drunk anymore guys I've got a handle on it and then they're like what about the wedding what about Jasmine's wedding they're all whispering about Jasmine's wedding so finally and he's like okay what happened in Jasmine's wedding and she's like mine what and then they all are like you want to say it you want to say it Jesse why don't you say it Jesse you should say it's like it has nothing to do with me they're like say it Jesse and he's like what happened at the wedding And Lala's calling Jesse out because he's lying.

She's like, bullshit, Jesse. Because, of course, Jesse came and told everybody what happened at the wedding and now wants to stay on his side of the couch's team. And so he won't say it. So now they're all stressing to get him to say it. So what happened at the wedding? Dun, done, done. We're going to find that out next week.

Spoiler alert. It's that he probably got wasted and ignored Nia. So, acted like a total drunk asshole at the wedding. Yeah. Well, good times, everyone. Thanks for being here for this extra long episode of the Valley. Next week, we wrap it all up, the last valley of the year.

So join us for that. Actually, join us every single day. Join us for our recap of NextGen New York City featuring us. Heyo. We'll talk to you on the next episode. Bye, everyone. Bye. Watch what crap ends.

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