Watch What Crappens - #3509 RHOC S20E07: Zip It

Episode Date: August 21, 2026

The Real Housewives of Orange County is so wacky this season that we get to see Shannon and Vicki get scared about not one, but TWO ziplines! Don’t worry, it doesn’t traumatize them. Vicki is still able to mom shame another woman for no reason. To watch this recap on video, listen to our bonus episodes, and get ad free listening, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. Find bonus episodes at patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens and follow us on Instagram @watchwhatcrappens @ronniekaram @benmandelker Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Well, hello and welcome to Watch What's Crappens, the podcast for old crap we love to talk about on ye old bros. I'm Ronnie. That's Benuni over there. Hello, Ben. Hi, how are you? Hey, good. Welcome to the end of the week. Thank you, Josaphat. What a week. We made it. We did it. It is real housewives of Orange County Day. As usual, if you want to watch this on video, you get all of the the videos of our recaps over on Patreon. Okay. That's where we do videos, bonus episodes.

This week we did a whole bonus episodes, bonus episode, about the banana split and ice cream. Yes. It was great. We learned so many things. We learned a lot of things and we had a lot of opinions about the man who claimed to have invented the banana split. So that was good. And all the different iterations of it.

And all the people trying to fight over ownership of it. it. So that was really fun. You'll also find ad-free listening on Patreon and a Discord server where you can go and talk poo with each other. There's a free newsletter every week that I write. It's like a recap of all these shows. And that's free. You can just sign up for that for free over at Patreon. Monday night is crappy hour. That's our live streaming Bravo headline show that we do with you guys every other Monday at 530 Pacific Time. And we do Amazon online every Monday at 1.30. Okay. So join us for all that good stuff. I think I'm ready to add something onto the pile, Ronnie. I think it's time to unveil a little project I have been working

on on the side with watch or crappins, which is that in an effort to make our YouTube channel even sexier and more fabulous than it already is, I have started up a YouTube series called Um, what's your order? And wherein, uh, I invite one of the fellow Bravo fan, uh, most likely from the Bravo content creator universe to come, uh, join me here in my office. And we talk about a, we come up with an order, a top five on a certain Bravo subject. And I've already recorded with, um, Courtney Frayne from two judgey girls, Kiki Monique from reality checked.

Um, I've also recorded with Eric Williams. from That's a Gay-Ass podcast and Julia Cunningham from Sirius XM and there will be more to come. And I think it's time to slap those episodes up onto YouTube and I think I'm going to do it next week. So keep an eye and an ear up for our YouTube because those videos are going to go up. Maybe I'll put them up for the weekend. Who knows? I've got to figure out a time to release it. But go subscribe for our YouTube because there'll be some really fun content coming up very shortly.

Wow, that's great. I can't wait to watch them. Congrats on the new show, buddy. Thank you. That's the Watchwell Crappins YouTube. I should elaborate in case you couldn't figure it out. Yes. So you'll see that all of our socials and all that good stuff. So go check that out. Today is Real Housewives of Orange County season 20 episode 7. All bets are off because we're in Vegas. So this show is still vicking, you know, through. It's limping. But I still laugh. So I don't know what that says about.

I still laugh. The show is limping. It's thirsty. It's trying. It's like, oh, the 20th anniversary. They're not quite making it over any kind of hill. But I still laugh. So that's really all I require in a show to make me laugh.

I mean, I'm amused by it. I don't think it's a very good season. Maybe it'll be like Beverly Hills. Beverly Hills had a dreadful start. And I think it sort of ended in a event. fun place. So, you know, here we are. It's episode seven, seven episodes in. Nothing's really happened. No real through lines. We're also giving, you know, we also need to point out Tamara, the Tamara, what's happening with Tamara, because Tamara is very much having one of her,

Oh yeah, I'm just nice present this season. We'll see how you bitches like that. I'm just going to be nice, everybody. Just smile about dumb. We'll see how your show is the idiots. And Tamara was basically looking at the camera every episode. Like, you like it? You like it? Like, I want to tell me mean on the internet, like that. Like, look what I bring to the show, you assholes. So I think Tamara is lying dormant. I think she is waiting to splurt like a volcano. Yeah, one has to hope that her fire upon everybody. Yeah, I'm hoping that a producer is like, Tamara, it's time for you to do your thing. Okay. Just do it. Just do it.

Yeah. But, yeah. I mean, I guess maybe for the sake of the trace amigas, she's being nicer, but like, unleash your wrath on Heather, unleash it on Jen, on Gina or Emily, whatever, anyone. But, I mean, the thing is that we're also getting a lot of Gina and Emily. They're very centered. And they're not quite interesting enough to be so central on this show. Okay.

I don't know how many times we can say it, but they just can't carry. this show. I don't think it was wise to bring both into the 20th season. I'm sorry, it's harsh, but it's just a reality. Their storylines are not compelling. It's not saying that other people's storylines are more compelling. Just saying their storylines. I was going to say, no one's really winning this season. Okay. No, no, there's no one that's like, wow, they're worth of money this season yet. So we'll see. But here we are in Las Vegas, Nevada, day two. before I, well, I guess I could say it right at the beginning because it's how it starts. The ladies are getting ready for the Grand Canyon.

Are you fucking kidding me? You're going to make me go to Vegas and then you're going to make me get in a car for four and a half hours with these people to drive to the Grand Canyon? No. There's my answer. No, I won't do it. I refuse to do it. Why would you bring me to Vegas and then make me get in a car for four and a half hours with these people? No.

There. Yeah, that is crazy. you would think that like if this were Beverly Hills they would just have like private helicopters taking them out there they could do it in like an hour but it is Orange County so they're like guess what

back in the car you go yeah so is it really four hours to the Grand Canyon from Vegas? I mean I didn't think it was like an hour away but I figured it was I figured it was a little closer than that that sucks man that means eight hours total crazy right? Okay well I'll do the

I'll check it out to Grand Canyon. Let's see. We're getting live results. I looked it up last night because I was horrified. You had the voice of someone who looked up these details. So I trusted. Oh, yeah. I looked at them.

That's the first thing I did. I pressed pause and looked it up. It's saying four hours and four minutes here. But last night it was saying four and a half hours. So I guess maybe there was traffic last night. Well, it's four hours each way. Each way. That's, you know what?

I'm going to say this. They probably stayed over at the Grand Canyon. And they probably did a day. There's no way those women are spending eight full hours. Maybe. Get a car together. That's crazy. You know, the things you do for work, I guess, but nobody even complained.

And that's when I was like, what is happening to this show? That no one's bitching about it. That there's no fights in the car. Like, what even happened in the car on the way over? So I just, I have a lot of questions about it. The main one being, why? Why would you do this? So they are getting ready to go on this trip.

Everybody's being wacky, talking about what they need to wear at the Grand Canyon. And let's see, Heather is checking with Jen because Jen is the one who ended up buckling and giving Shannon a better room. So Heather's asking her if she slept okay. And she's like, yeah, the room is no different. I mean, what is this whole room change thing? I mean, it was just such a pain at the ass. I'm really upset with Shannon. I'm really upset.

Well, you shouldn't have changed the rooms, you damn me? I need to clarify something here. Ronnie, to go from Caesar's Palace to the Grand Canyon Skywalk is actually two hours and 19 minutes. Wow. Well, thank you for clarifying. Then how come when I put Las Vegas to the Grand Canyon, it says four hours? Is it possible that you sought out a different part of the Grand Canyon? Oh, it's a big canyon.

It's grand. It is a big canyon. It's pretty big. It's in the title. It's in the title. Oh, so here's why. If you type in the longest possible way, I put Las Vegas strip to the Grand Canyon four hours and 29 minutes. I will tell you why.

Because the Grand Canyon is huge. And if you just type in Grand Canyon, it takes you to the other end of the Grand Canyon. And that adds two more hours, which, by the way, wow, the Grand Canyon is. to big. I didn't realize it was two hours just to get to the other side of it. But yes, the skywalk that they went on to is two hours away, which is much more doable. Makes much more sense. Yeah, and that would make sense that they would put the skywalk as close to Vegas as possible. So, okay, something was not sitting well with me. I'm glad we got to bottom of that. We restart the recap because that was 10 minutes. I think, I think, well, if you listen to that part of

that like 10 times over, you could really cut through your commute from Vegas to the observation deck. By the time I'm done bitching incorrectly about the time it took for them to be there, you would have been there, basically. Yeah, because you know we would have gotten emails about that. That's the exact sort of thing that I've been like, actually, from Vegas to the observation deck, it's only two hours. You know, you know. Okay. Well, that is a lot better. Thank you. Sorry to everybody. Sorry to production. Okay. Let's get on with it.

Anyway, this Shannon not taking the room and getting out of staying in that room because of the electrical interference from the elevators is very Shannon. But man, I wish they just made her stay in that room so we could see Shannon just in the fetal position today. Like I see the elevator. It changed my brain. I'm seeing people. A little girl crawled out of the toilet last night and asked me. me to cut her hair, then get out of here. I'm not myself. I've had elevator radiation. I don't know what's happening with me. I'm zombie.

I'm actually literally zombie. I'm not even alive. Oh, my God, help me. You said it okay. You said it okay. David, David, David, David, David, David, David, David, David, David, David, David. David, David, David, David. So, so, yeah, so they're changing rooms and everything.

They're getting ready. Did you mention this part already while I was looking up the distance to the Grand Canyon, Jen, saying how the room. this like this whole thing is a pain in the ass did you mention that part jen saying that okay well what i'd like to add is jen you're the one who volunteered to switch the rooms at that point like you can't complain if you volunteered yourself yeah like you did i didn't want to move i didn't want to move i just already unpacked everything the toothbrush was in the holder already do you do this do you unpack everything when you get into a hotel room no that's the other thing i wanted to point

out like i am not someone who moves into my hotel room i definitely just like live out of my bag. Maybe if I was staying in a hotel for a long time, I would do it. Like, I hang things up. And, like, I take things out of my toiletry bag as I need them. And then once they're out there, sort of out on that counter. I think it's a guy thing, how we do it. Because I think they have so much stuff that they have to, you know, like makeup and this

and that. They have to, there's just so, I was watching this thinking, God, is, not that I didn't know this before, but God, it's so much more difficult. being a woman, you know. The stereotype when I was young was like, oh, he wants to be a girl because he's dressing up in his mom's clothes and stuff like that. And some kids do, you know, that's fine. I didn't, I just have always, like, respected the hustle, you know?

Yeah. Because it's a lot. It's a lot of hustle. It's a lot of work. Well, thank you. Yeah. We both, I'm sure, unzip our bag, get shit out as we need it. I put the toiletry bag by the sink.

I do what you do. I get shit out as I need it and then throw it back in there wet. I don't even care if it's wet. I do not care. That's wild. What I will say is this. I live a packing cube lifestyle, so I might as well just have drawers. Everything's organized in my bag.

So I know where things are generally speaking. But my parents, by the way, they are chest of drawers people. Okay. They get into a hotel room. And the first thing they are doing is they're opening those shelves up and they are putting clothes in shelves. even if it's for like two days, they are doing it. Like, they just, they love to put things away. And so, like, there are some people that just, they just love to do that.

And God bless them. But I just am like, it's too much work. The bag. I just spent 10 hours getting here. The bag is going in the corner. These days, I used to not even put the bag on the little bag rack. Now I do do that. I'm starting to realize the value in having the bag a little bit higher up.

It's like, it's almost like a buffet. It's like, ooh, what do we have in here today? What's in the bag today? But everything on that. Oh, baby buffet. It's like, wow, I could wear this cheap-ass shirt with holes in it or this cheap-ass shirt with holes and stains on it. I like to pretend that when my bag is on the little bag stool and it's opened up,

that it's just like a 1920s waitress and a speakeasy. Be like, what do you want cigarettes? Want some hooch? I'm like, I'll just take my socks, please. So Jen's saying, oh my God, this one may need help. I mean, she's not even out of the bathroom yet, and I guarantee you, she's standing there with three hats on her head and shit all over my counter. So Shannon comes in, and she's like, I've got Diet Coke for you.

She's like, this is not going to, you cannot bribe me with the Diet Coke, Shannon. You cannot bribe me. I'm very upset, Shannon. You could do that with me. I'd be like, well. Thank you so much for the Diet Coke. Thank you so much. Thank you so much.

She's such a kind of person. Really. You do put the ass in Aspartame, but you know what? you're an ass that I love. Thank you so much. She asked us, why didn't this situation with Heather just go straight to the source?

Why didn't it? It did. She said last night at dinner. Heather, I was very hurt that you took the room and we didn't even get to discuss it. And Heather said, Really?

Well, if you wanted the room, you need to communicate by saying, let's have a rock and paper scissors. Or let's pull straws. Or let's have an Alfredo toss. Whoever tosses Alfredo. out the furthest wins. What's that game that you play with the things that you bash and cut and cut Alfredo with?

Rock paper scissors. Why don't we play that? So the ladies all meet up in the main suite and Shannon comes in in a wacky scooter. It's a jazzy. It's a jazzy. That's right. It's me. Shannon Bador.

Here's how the horn sounds. It's funny because my new next-door neighbor is DJ Jazzy Jeff. So it sort of makes sense if you think about it. No, no one. Alfredo, where hell are you? Could someone get Alfredo to Las Vegas as soon as possible? Thank you. So this is a wacky, oh, there you go.

What took you so long, Alfredo? Come on. This is a wacky, uh, Vicki and Shannon. you know, Vicki's limping, so she's going to get a scooter now. Watch out. But Shannon comes in and she's being so wacky on it that she runs over Vicky. Just. It was actually kind of gratifying.

It was gratifying. The audience thanks you. The audience did. Because Shannon on a jazzy is not what anyway. Especially after her brain's been fried by elevator radiation. So she just should not be on any sort of thing that has wheels in a, steering wheel. So Vick is like,

out, after that, I mean, there's bigger reasons for her not to be in a moving vehicle than that, but I'll just say,

you with that one. The house without a face would like a word. Yeah, exactly. And so Vicky's like, what is Shannon thinking? Her heart is there,

but she definitely wants to help me, but come on, you almost killed me. So Shannon's like, um, Jen, can I borrow my purse today? Because I bought it,

I brought it for today, for Grand Canyon going. And I just, I've never worn it before. And so it turns out that as part of this switcheroo, Shannon's going to let Jen use one of her bags for the day or something like that. But almost immediately, Shannon's like, yeah, that bag that you took, I actually wanted to wear that today. So can I have a back?

Thanks. My grand canyon outfit requires the green bag. I don't, I don't have another bag that's going to work with my Grand Canyon outfit. Her Grand Canyon outfit is like, it's like funeral, sun funeral. You know, it's like a sunny day funeral. Sunny day funeral, sun funeral. So Jen's like, this is just so typical that she already needs to borrow it. Oh my God, oh my God. So they go, they go out and Vicki's on her scooter and everyone's like, oh my God, watch our Vicki!

And Vicki's like, I'm going to be black and blue up to my anus after this. So now they head into the cars to head to the Grand Canyon for a two-hour drive. And Emily is asking, she's like, so how's Carmela in your room, Tamara? And Tamara's like, well, I went to get talked to last night and she was really outfazzled because the daughter's sick. Oh, no. That was he flashbacks of last night and Carmela's daughter has the flu. Literally, so stupid. Like, oh my God, honey, I'm sending an IV for you at noon.

Please call me and let me know you're okay. She's like 15, okay? She's calling sick because you're away and you can't stop her ass from not going to school. Give me a break. Like, oh, Carla, I mean, Carmela, she's just so distraught. Her child has a cold. And we now cut to the other car where Carmel is like calling her daughter. and just like, how are you?

And then Carmela's like, well, she has the flu guys. And Gina's like, oh, my God, how old is she? Like, who's? And then she's like, who's staying with her? And Carmela's like, well, her older sister's taking care of her. And then Danny is staying too. I probably owe him big time for this. Well, it shouldn't be a big deal that he's taken care of your kid.

Right. She's like, well, to him, I don't think it is. But I definitely feel grateful. Faith. She's still not feeling well. Well, which makes me feel very uncomfortable because Danny's not the caretaker. I mean, yeah, he'll help with rides or something, but I'm the parent. It's me.

It's me who should be there letting the IV person in. I know. Danny, Danny can step up. I'm going to say this right now. If he's your boyfriend, he is the parent right now, and he can step up and he can bring her soup and Theraflu and whatever she needs. And he does not need to be out big time. Doesn't Danny live with them all? He's like part of the household and he cheated on you.

So, yeah, Danny. Danny can be taking care of the kids. Danny can be doing the oil changes outside. Okay? Danny can be pulling weeds in the back. The hell, he doesn't have to. Danny can do a lot of things. Okay, yeah. So Gina's like, I mean, but when you're like a step parent, you fall in love with your stepkids.

Like, you know what you mean? You just do for them like you do for your own kids. That's why I'm always putting up shower curtains in the middle of their rooms. Okay? I just treat them like they're my own. Well, when I filed for divorce at the time, time the kids were three, four, five, and six. So it was quite a few years, basically. Very consecutive.

Three, four, five, six. Yeah. They were, they were almost a dance beat. Um, chance like, oh, so when did you, when did you actually file? She says, oh, well, we were in the business together and we kept on just kind of kicking it down the road and their dad is, you know, he's a great quarterback, but business is not his thing. So I manage a portfolio and it's a lot of. lot. And Gina's like, but you're raising four children. She's like, yeah, and I quit my job to raise

them so we could live out his career. Yeah, she's going on and trying to open up to the ladies. I'm bored, frankly, but, you know, I mean, she's new, but I'm like, yeah, I need more than this. And then I don't know what I wanted her to say. But if you're like, I had kids at three, four, five, six, I want you to say, like, when's a tap dancer loves tap. Tap. One is already robbed a liquor store. You know, I need something. You're new, you know. So the tap dancing one, by the way, was the one who robbed the liquor store.

That's why I didn't get away with it. For Christ, say, get it together. You're going to rob a liquor store and tap shoes. Am I right? But, you know, still we persist. Still we persist. And Vicki is hating this. She's just staring ahead.

It's like, this woman does not make sense with anything she says. I mean, there's just something wrong with here. There's something wrong here. I don't know why nobody else is saying it. Why is nobody I see yet? And so then the other car, Tamara's like, Can you explain to me what business come out is going to do with you, Jen? And Jen's like, I really can't.

I don't have a real estate's, I don't have a real estate license. And I'm not an interior designer. I don't have a developer's license. I barely know how to open a door. The other day, I got very confused by a stool. I was like, what is this drum? And then I was drumming on it. And then I got kicked out of the coffee shop.

It's a lot of things I'm just not capable of doing. so I don't really know what I'm supposed to do with her. When she told me, I feel like it's putting the cart before the horse. You know what I mean? I think you need to establish a foundation and a friendship first before you throw out business ventures to people. I mean, what the hell? This woman gave me a $3,000 purse.

Burn her at the stake. I'm so sick of nice people. I'm sorry, but are we not supposed to be putting carts before the horses? How else is the horse going to push the cart? No? No? Are we supposed to buy horses if we can't put them in cards? So how is a horse supposed to go grocery shopping if it can't go behind the cart to push it down the aisle?

Well, yeah, what if she tries you? And she's like, okay, you work for me now. You got to pick up my dry cleaning and my coffee. That'd be hilarious. She's like, okay, well, I'll do it for 20 grand. I mean, that's a pretty good offer, right? And she's like, yeah, that's a lot. I mean, that's not a lot for a year.

I mean, the year of drag cleaning, no, it's not a lot, maybe. Tamara. I just love this version of Tamara that you have in the back. Yeah, it's not that much. She's not a lot, but it's guys. I don't know. It's not really, I'm just imagining this like little Tamara and Gremlin in the back of the car trying to figure out, like, if not $20,000 is a good deal to get coffee for someone.

Yeah, baby. I don't know. How many figure about it? I love, baby. it's time for a commercial it's time for a crap and's commercial in the other car shanna's like oh look at the Grand Canyon it is so big Vicki's like that's what she said so um now back to the other car Jen's like this is a dumb question they're like we know Jen yeah Jen you don't have to leave that part in we it's assumed if it's coming from you

and God bless her it really is a dumb question And so it is dumb. Guys, how did the Grand Canyon get out in the middle of nowhere? Like, who found this? How do you even, how do you even think to go looking for this? You're at a casino and you just say, wow, I think I'm going to go look for a big hole in the ground until you find it. I mean, why were people, what were people even doing out here? And she was totally serious.

She was totally serious. I mean, I have, for sure, thought about what it must have been like to be someone who stumbled upon the Grand Canyon for the first time. be like, holy shit, you know? Like, that must have been amazing. But it's also hilarious that she's like, who found this? How did it get here? Why is it here? Magnets.

How do they work? Just like, her brain's going to explode by the end of this trip. There's just so much for her to consider. It was so funny. And she goes, yeah, like, why do we even know it's here? Like, that's crazy. Someone actually drove out here to find it. And Emily's like, what explorer?

found the Grand Canyon? Well, I assumed when they created the 13 colonies and we all started expanding West, they just found it. Yes, of course. 13, what? What's that? What? Who has 13 colon? It's like, yes, of course. No one started exploring and ravaging this continent until America was founded first. Once America was found, we're like, okay, for those, who are wondering the European explorer of course you know native people found it way earlier but for those who are wondering to know want to know the answer to this precise question it is Garcia Lopez de Cardenas who reached the South Rim in

1540 which was earlier than the colonies and I'll bet if you look it up it took him four and a half fucking hours to get there thank you a very long time actually i don't know when the 13 colonies were officially like came to be yet those were 1607 well the first colony was 1607 but then the rest were much later because they all had to get to who cares the point well actually i do care this is all actually more interesting than what's actually happening on the show let me tell you let me tell you when like came into this world August 25th, 1975. Before that, nothing was happening, as far as I was concerned.

The Grand Canyon didn't exist until you came here, Ronnie. That's it. Nothing is really there until you see it. Jen is like, so Emily's theory is that once the 13 colonies were all, once we're all established, then that's when the gumption's, the gumption of America just headed west, and then they found the Grand Canyon. And Jim was like, so you were just in your horse and buggy? Yes, people took a horse and buggy like the ones you see in Central Park. They just took it all the way out to Arizona until they fell into a hole.

She just doesn't get it at all. But there's not even a freeway by here. I mean, what's a horse and buggy? Why would they do that? Yeah. And they're like, wow, look at that big hole. Let's go around it. And there goes, don't hang left.

There's a big ditch. Sorry, that was just my test. Next to Alfredo. There's a joke. There is a big ditch on the right. He's gonna crash into it. It'll be hilarious. Yeah, who found the Grand Canyon?

What are you stupid? So Heather's like, I'm not Magellan. I can barely get to 7-Eleven. Heather, you have never been to a 7-Eleven. Cut it out. I know. I'm pretending that she's been to a 7-Eleven is as crazy as Jen not understanding.

I'm not understanding anything about discovering things. Yeah, Heather, I'm not even sure she knows what a 7-Eleven is. That's where you go when you hire seven new servants at 11 a.m., correct? So the ladies arrive at the Grand Canyon's Skywalk entrance, and they put on some booties because they don't want to scratch up the skywalk, which is really nice until they get on their hands and knees with all their rings and then start dragging their jewelry across it. First thing I thought of.

So they're walking around the skywalk. They're being ridiculous. Like, oh, no, I'm going to fall over. Oh, wow. And then, Shannon's like, I'm going to burp. I am going to burphe. I'm like, Shannon, you are as far away from electromagnetic radiation right now. You're dangling over the Grand Canyon.

in you're safe, except for the fact that you're not a precarious structure. But who cares? Do not look down. Do not look down. So Tamara's showing them how to do it and they lay on their stomach and, you know, crawl on the floor and stuff. And Vick is like, oh, my God. Blah, blah.

Shannon's pretending like she's ice skating or something. She's like clutching the wall and unsteady, you know. It's not, it's not, I have to say, it's, it's, she's not building her case for coming back next season. I'll tell you that much. I love Shannon, but this stick has got to go. Yeah, you, this is definitely a time where I think people were hoping that a couple of screws would pop out of that overhang thing. Like, you want to be scared, be really scared.

I want to see like some final destination shit. You know, where it's like, wow, she's like hanging off and just like hanging by, you know, a thread of Vicky's scooter. We're going to need Shannon to find a man soon. because that's when she stops pretending to be wacky and fun. And then she just gets consumed with her own insecurities about her relationship. And that's much more fun to watch. Well, I don't know whose idea was to put all these accident prone women on a glass bridge over the Grand Canyon. Jeez.

And they're like, wow, woohoo, wow, woohoo, wow, being wacky, wacky, wacky, wacky. And Carmela is doing the typical, like, Kyle Richards track of like, like, I'm just terrified. I can't look down. I cried on a Disneyland ride, like a virtual one that you ride in the air, but you feel like you're really in the air. And my kids were like, Mom, this is embarrassing. I had Ivy's brought in for all nine of us.

And then the staff who like works like the ticket booth at this place, Bravo's like here, bring this boat champagne out. They're like, uh, okay. And they walk out like, like, here's some champagne. Like, oh, wow, this is great, bitch. I feel like this, like, this like luxe experience. while there's like tourists everywhere and um jen saying oh my god if the champagne would have come out before maybe we would have been running on the platform but we'll take it we'll take it now please i'm

like yeah that's why the champagne doesn't come out before okay unless we watch the first housewife fall into the grand canyon yeah exactly it's like the the most dangerous place to be drunken hanging over the grand canyon and as we do on housewives trips we get two options so people can split up and go do stuff. You can go ziplining or you can do a cultural experience. Please let Vicki not do the cultural experience. Yeah, seriously. She has a, yeah, she luckily has a allergic reaction to anything cultural.

So she immediately goes to ziplining and Heather goes, I'll do the cultural. So they're going to split up. Some are going to do ziplining. Some will do cultural. And Shannon's saying, I feel empowered that I stood on that bridge. Please, not only should you feel empowered, I want you to stand in your power, Shannon. You seem like a new woman. Zipliders, let's go.

I've ziplied a lot before. Mexico, Costa Rica, stepping out of the comfort zone, zip lighting over the Grand Canyon. I mean, it's just so much fun. I think I could do it. I can do it. I can do it. So they go up to the ziplining place, and Emily's like, Is there a saloon we can stop by first?

I did a shot or something. What are we going to do? Hey, hey, who do you have to know to whip it up around here, Wes? Oh, gosh, Vicki. You're not even remembering your saying. You're saying is who do you got to whip it up with to get a woo-hoo around here? It's been stuck in my brain melting it for weeks. And you're fucking it up.

Come on. Seriously. So they have to climb the seven-foot structure, seven-flight structure. Imagine, wow, seven feet. There's a lot of feet to go up. Seven flights to get to climb up the structure and then they're going to zip line across what seems to be a field that's alongside the Grand Canyon or near the Grand Canyon, but not actually over the Grand Canyon, which makes sense. It looks scary to me. Big.

Looks too big to zip line over. But they're just doing a zip line, something another. And then we actually have to, they actually use it as a cliffhanger for the commercial break. Like, will they be able to do their zip lining? It's always bad when the zip lining has to be the teaser. to get you through the commercials. Yeah. The ziplining actually was scary to me because the way you do it as you hold on to a thing,

I guess you're sat on like a little swing of some kind, right? Or is that the harness that you're kind of sitting? You're like in a harness. You're supposed to hold a thing. I was bringing up groceries the other day. I'm so weak. I was like, oh, my God, it's too heavy. I needed to kind of, it was two grocery bags, by the way.

I had to stand there for a minute and, like, drop them and then resume. I don't think I have the arm strength to hang on to these things. I would fall off. No, I mean, if you, if you would, you would still go. You still go. It's not like if you let go of that thing, you fall down to the ground. You're in their harness, but I think. Well, that I know.

But you still don't want to just let go of the handles and you're, you're doing it like this, you know, on your back. I don't know. It didn't look fun to me. I don't, I don't understand why people do this. They did it, and it was wacky. So Emily and Jen go first. And then we go to the cultural, and they do fine. They're alive.

And then we go to the cultural experience with Heather, Carmilla, Tamara, and Gina. And there's a guy who's like, welcome to the Wallapai Nation on the reservation that we've been here since time began. Okay. Could you speed it up? We don't have all day. Great culture. Speaking of reservations. more quickly.

Speaking of reservations, we are expected at Nobu tonight. Are you interested in working at my house? Let me ask you something. You've been here since the beginning of time. Does that mean you know how to use a broom? Are you familiar with Richard Marks? Just wondering. We have tribal members come out and perform our traditional song and dance.

Oh, great! Do we get to choose? I do whatever I want, whenever I want, with whoever I want to. That was a song I performed, written by Richard Marks. Thank you very. Do that one. Oh, since we're performing, would you mind if I joined in? I did just take a performance class at the Groundlings last year, just to brush up on my musical theater. musical theater experience that i got at syracuse university i wasn't anything goes i don't know if you saw that but uh sure okay you'll just move out of the way and i'll take center stage thank you very

much well we are going to be telling a traditional story yes and now that's called improv go on go on we are the birds this is our final resting place And birds rest in beds, which I am in because I am a bird. And? And I am bringing macaroni and cheese to this dinner party. And what about you? This is our home. And this is the best day of the year because it is mother's birthday.

And we got her crazy gifts, and... I don't think you... you understand that this is a sacred ritual and you're seeing seen wipe the scene wipe the scene i didn't like that i didn't like that you need to learn a little yes and okay there there was my culture to you you're welcome you're welcome you're welcome they're just not used to dealing with famous people well we did recently have a very beautiful moment with the actress wendy mellick quiet my turn my turn still speaking still me

So over at the zip line, now Vicki is, doesn't want to do it anymore. She sees her life flashing before her eyes. Oh my God. Do I tell Michael I love it by four grandkids and I tell them I love that by daughter, my son-in-law, code of insurance? Who's going to buy code of insurance? I need to call all of my loved ones. Yes, Vicki, you called all of your loved ones. They were sent to voicemail.

Yeah. Okay. Just move on with your life. Okay. Michael's like, it's all you were. it's not going to happen again for four years. Stop calling me. So basically, Vicky and Shannon decide not to do it.

So they head over to the others. They meet up with everyone else. And Shaan's like, God, I wish I wasn't such a went. Maybe if I had all my facilities about me and hadn't been fried by an elevator, even though it was minimal exposure. It was just enough to make it not safe for me to zip line. I'm sorry, girls. Yeah, so they just go down and meet them,

and they're still wearing their harness. everything. Emily's like, why are you still wearing your harnesses? Well, they didn't come to take them from us. So, well, we just stole harnesses from a native reservation. I guess we missed the cultural part, huh? Yeah, well, you know, that's okay. I mean, we are our own culture.

If you think about it, Housewives culture, isn't that a lot? Is that nice? Americans have been stealing from the natives since the beginning of time. Since the beginning of time. I saw it on the front, so. Chase me. Yeah. Wow.

We, yeah, and then we do also see, like, Tamara's crying over the cultural experience, by the way. She's like, because it's a piss for the song about the birds. It makes me want to cry. And Gina's like, aw, are you getting emotional right now? That's, like, so sweet. Like, I'm, like, really happy that you're doing so well. Like, I've seen such a difference this year, Like, I could tell in everything you're doing and you're communicating, you're just feeling better.

I said, yeah, I just got nothing to go. Yeah, it's like crazy, Tamara. Like, we've been to, like, two dinners where you've opened your mouth and black smoke didn't come out and start choking children. I'm just, like, so proud to be your friend. So proud. So then we see Emily and Jen. walking around the Grand Canyon and Emily's like, you know what I was thinking?

I feel like maybe you should say something to Shannon just about the tantrums and the behavior and the meltdowns. Go do it, Jen's like, okay, thank you very much. I will absolutely do that. Yes, thank you. Got something completely natural for you to do. Get upset about the rooms and we're sucking air.

Please do anything. So Jen's like, 100, 1 million, Thousand percent. Heather's right. Okay. You know, this is just really upsetting. Shannon is definitely directing her energy in the wrong place. You look crazy because you just don't address the realness of whatever your problem is.

You did already. But keep milking this. I mean, I guess you guys don't have anything else. So go ahead. I'll go along with it. Vicky and, um, Vicki and, um, Vicki and, um, I'm humiliated that I did the zip line.

Okay. Oh, you're still. going to just steal those harnesses? What are you doing? Well, nobody took it off us. So you know what? I'm taking it. Well, we're talking about you. You know, you came, you came up from my perspective. I kind of feel badly about Jen. Poor Jen about the room. We were talking about it. It was really rough on Jen. So you guys fight about the room again. Come on. Well, you know what? What angered me is that Heather always cares about the room. And you know that she, you know that she does. And she walked in and she sat in a bed and I go, oh, is this your room? And

goes, well, I took my shoes off, so yeah, it is. And Jen's going to be in the primary, so you take this room here. And I thought, don't tell me what I'm doing, Missy. And the way I expressed that is that I looked at her and I gulped. And I said, oh, okay. And I think I was pretty clear when I said that. Yeah, I said, okay, I will be in that room dying from electromagnetic waves coming off an elevator. I was so furious.

If you hear me shriveling into nothing, that's why Heather and George. your room. I was absolutely furious. I was living. I could barely control my emotions, which is why I then walked my Heather's room and I said, oh, you look very pretty today. And then I walked back to my bed and I felt great that I got that off my chest. You know what she did? She peed out of the bed. That's what she did. Heather. She just peed out of bed. Vicki, you're someone who's like literally peed on beds on this show. Just say anything else, you know? How they did not throw clips in here of Vicki pissing all over beds is It was kind of a miracle.

I don't know how that wasn't in here. Yeah, seriously. So, Shannon's like, what I care about is Heather's whole era. It's Heather's way. Okay? So, well,

then that's what you should have said at dinner. Well, I thought I did say that. You're saying that it didn't come across that way? No, I think what you said was, oh, I remember now. It was,

could you please pass the bread? I think that says it all, right? No? Well, it really didn't come across that way. Well, I was hoping that I would say, Oh, Heather, you look so nice. It's so niceing you up here from heaven after I've died from electromagnetic elevator waves. I thought that would convey the point, but apparently not.

You know, this is a real wake-up call for me. I need to be honest with Heather. Lord knows, she's honest with everybody else here. It's also a wake-up call for me because I've heard nothing but ringing ever since I was close to that elevator. Wow. Well, I've had issues with Heather, and it's not easy. you've got to have your points ready. You've got to have some protein first, maybe do some calisthenics.

You've got to get some feathers on your sleeve. I mean, I've got that. I think people avoid it sometimes because they just don't have it in them. They're just tired. You're just too tired of fighter. It is a good point how Heather is because there is no winning with Heather. And I love it. It's so fucking funny to me.

So Shannon's like, I'm getting meltdown about it now, guys. Now you're going to be very meltdown. about it. No more meltdown, Shannon. Jeez, just talk to her. Well, you know, I, I prided myself on the fact that I didn't demand the best room like Heather does all the time. Me, Shannon, but I could have been a diva and I wasn't. Shannon, you just cried all night about fake electromagnetic waves until somebody gave you your way. You're like 30 times worse than Heather. At least Heather's just like, this is my room. Get out. Yeah. Yeah, I feel like Shannon has had a fit over rooms before. So Shannon says, I'm just, Jen, I'm just going to talk to her now.

Okay, is that all right? Because they're back at the hotel now. So she's going to go say something. Jen goes, oh, okay, you want me to step out? Oh, yeah, no, it's fine. You can step out if you want or not. It's okay, but you could go. Get out of here.

So Heather's like, okay, I'm sensing you have something to say to me. So, yes, Heather, when you came into the room, I said, is this your room? which was my way of saying, I want this room. And you go, yeah, because I took my shoes off. And it bothered me because what you don't understand is it has nothing to do with the rooms. It was that the decision was made. And I feel like I wasn't talked about it. To me, no one talked to me about it.

And that's what bothered me. Mm-hmm. Okay. Listen, I hear what you're saying. But I don't 100% agree with you. You have a voice. And if it bothered you, And if you felt that way, you should have told me we're playing rock, paper, scissors.

But I don't like to hurt people's feelings, and I would like to remind everybody. I don't have someone that I just, I feel like really low this last week. And last week, and there's an altercation or I don't feel good. I don't have somebody to come home and talk to about it. I mean, sure, I could always open up a brick of Philadelphia cream cheese and pour my heart and soul out to it, but it doesn't ever say anything back to me. I don't have a partner to bounce shit off of. That's it.

That's it. I'm allowed. Oh, I understand, Shannon. You're alone. You know, you remind me of those dog stores they used to have in the mall. You'd walk in, you'd see pets. They'd be in cages. It'd be so sad.

Nobody would pet them. Little homely ones. You'd walk by. Kids wanted to buy the cute ones. The homely ones just sat there. And you thought they're probably going to be taken away and turned into hot dog meat at some point and you would think, oh, and then you'd get the cute animal. And that that poor little, that poor little gerbil never had the chance, did it? What were we talking about?

Are you hungry? I have a carrot in my purse. Are you equating me to a puppy mill? Well, I'm just saying, those, those things never fought me for a room. You know, and if they had a feeling, they would tell me, Shannon, I'm sorry you're dying alone. That said, I got the bigger room because I was there first. So if you don't like it, you need to say something. Heather's trying to be understanding because Shannon's whipping out the, I'm single. And Heather's trying to be nice, but she can't. She's literally just staring at her with her black eyes, rolling her eyes.

Good God. Yeah. Now we have to listen to the Shannon is single thing. Oh, God. I think this is the best apology that I'm going to get from Heather, and I just wish Heather would just say, you know what? Yeah, I contributed too. I was maybe inconsiderate. Heather does not care. She's like, I'm going to get dressed.

And when I get dressed, I'm going to swirl around a lot because I have so much room in my room. I really put the idea of room in the bedroom. Know what I'm saying? Okay, if anyone needs me, I'm just doing whirling dervishes over there. Bye. Commercials. Here comes one right now. Now we go to the casino. the ladies are walking in the gamble and Vicki's doing her scooter thing before we watch her run up more stairs, which I think she's already run upstairs in this one.

And Shannon wants to play Blackjack. Because when I win, I get to go, which is different than woo-hoo because Vicky has woo-hoo, but I have, it's very different. And so they're gambling and Heather wins at Rulette. And Tim was like, why did the rich keep getting richer? She's like, I'm not a big gambler.

But I kind of wish that my numbers would come up a little bit more than I'd like to Brouswood, bitch. Heather's numbers aren't even coming up. They're just rolling the ball. And then Heather's going, Put my chips on the winning number, Alfredo. I won. I won.

If you wanted your number to come up, we could have played rock paper scissors. So, uh, Jen, Carmela is talking about how she had so much fun today. And Jen says, you know, by the way, some of the girls were saying that they felt like it was odd that you're building a business team before working on friendships. Carmela's like, oh, so we're just not going to support each other? Is that what, was that what we're going to do? We're not supporting friends, like women supporting women.

That's where we're not going to do. Oh, no, we support each other. We support you. We support you. Don't worry about it. We support you. And then the other ladies come up. And Emily's like, it's awful.

loud over here. I hope something's being stirred up because this episode really sucks. And Carmela's like, well, listen, I mean, it should be a happy thing, not a contentious thing. I'm still not sure what we're upset about here. And Heather's like, what happened? Did Shannon start crying about a room again? John's like, well, I just asked Carmela, you know, talking about the business thing, you know, because people thought it was weird, right? I mean, Emily thought it was weird. Remember, Emily, when you said that freakazoid, Carmela, just giving you money in a business and you're an idiot and you don't deserve anything? It was something like that.

I did say it. It was weird. Well, we have a new friendship, and she wants to try something new, and I want to support her in that. Yeah, so what, like, be an employee, be an apartment, like, what is it? Like, get a job. And Emily's like, well, the way you put it like that, that makes sense to me.

But when you told me about it at your house, you were like, oh, I'll just like have her help and then throw her 20 grand. So then Shannon's like, well, I just, I got my fellow's Rancho Santa Fe. I feel so bad, sweetie. I feel like you're defending yourself for your generosity and your kindness.

And unfortunately, as we see what happened with the hotel rooms, generosity is just often not reciprocated in this group. So I feel so bad for you, sweetie, my fellow Rancho, Rancho. You shouldn't have to defend your generosity and kindness the same way that Heather doesn't have to defend not having generosity and kindness.

Do you think, these people just don't understand? These people just don't understand. understand the Rancho Santa Rancho way of life. Please tune them out for your own set. Please. Rancho to Rancho, sister. Well, it's just a lot of red flags. We're just wondering about stuff.

Well, who's wondering, though? Yeah, I'm wondering. It's a red flag. That's what I'm saying. It's red flag. And Carmela's like, well, I've never in my life done something I thought was nice and had it picked apart to this degree. I'm so sorry, dear.

Oh, I'm so sorry, my little almost cucka manga. We could have been Rancho Cucamanga. But Rancho Santa Fe. That's what makes this special. That's just, it's, you know, there's another world where we could have been San Juan Capistranos together. But I'm glad that we're ranchos. I'm glad we're ranchos. Okay, well, you're a new friend.

You're a new friend. And I like you as a person. Okay. I like you as a slutty person, at least. You know, which is the type of person I normally don't like. But you're a person. You're breathing. And I like things that are breathing.

So, listen, I don't like all these adodes, though. Do you live in Orange, Yes or no? Do you live in Orange County? Well, I live in Rancho Santa Fe, and I have a second home in Orange County. Okay, and you left your kids in San Diego? That's bizarre to be. Who would leave their children? Who would leave their children?

People have different living situations. And Carmel is like, I always put my children first. That's below the bell. I understand. But like, then why are you in Orange County then? Like, why? I just like, because I have a job. Like, it doesn't make sense.

Because at 14 years old, one year older than my grandson. son, does no way my daughter would leave that child. No way, no way. And I was like, whoa. Also, let's just remember who's saying this here. Vicky, the mother of the year, who when she was dating Brooks and Brianna said, wow, Brooks said, Brooks told my husband to beat me. And then he asked me if he could show me his girth Brooks. And Vicki stood up for Brooks and stayed with Brooks after this. So can we not, can we not get into what a wonderful mother Vicki is? Yeah, can we not? Also, wild that like, Vicki's like one of those kids is already 13. That's crazy.

Um, so then of course, Heather goes, Vicky, that's no, we are not doing children. No, no, no, no, not children. Heather starts yelling at Vicky like she's a dog that got into the trash. No, no, no, no, no, no, Vicky. Tell me what to do. You can't tell me what to do. Just move on. Do not talk to me that way.

I'm telling you, 14, 50, 60. I'm with my kids. I'm with my kids. I know. When they were that age, I was always with them. Yeah, and neither one of them will even come see you or spend time with you, Vicki. Okay? Maybe less of that.

Yeah. No kids. No kids. So Carmel is like, my children know who their mom is. Stand down. Don't talk to me that one. Do not talk to me that way. Are we going to...

So everybody agrees. Oh, go ahead. We have to now, like, move Heather to the front lines of some conflict. But stand down. She's also, like, auditioning for, like, you know, House the Dragon season four or something. Like, she's going to be... Both lips that she makes, like, stand down. I'm very angry, Heather, right now.

I'm Chip clipping your face. Stand down. Oh, God. I don't. She just, it's just disciplining Vicky. So she's, this has gone too far. How Carmela chooses the parent is none of Vicki's business. We can shame her for so many other things instead, not this one. You cannot criticize someone as a mother ever.

Unless it's your own, of course. Fuck her. Yeah. Well, I did say as a mother. I did say as a mother. Well, I know who I am as a mom, and I don't need to defend that. That's one place in life. I'm motherfucking solid. Thank you. And Vicki's like, why is everybody just drinking Carmela's Kool-Aid?

Why? Like, maybe Carmela gave everybody a vibrator. Maybe that's why they're excited about her. Weird. Weird. That's crazy. That's crazy. Good one.

Cresi Town. So then Carmel's like, fuck that bitch. Fuck that bitch in her scooter. And so. I love that. Fuck that bitch. Fuck her scooter. So now, it's a new day.

Emily's Face-Taming with Shane. asking how the kids are. Luke is at school. And then they just talk about Annabelle. Emily's like, is Luke at school because he keeps texting me? And she's like, well, don't text him back.

Gee, Shane. Yeah, you send Annabel grilled cheese when I'm trying to make her eggs. And then you send her a grilled cheese sandwich. Well, I feel bad I'm not there. I get gilded into things. So I call her DoorDash. Well, then buy it for her when you're here.

What's the excuse then? He says she does at the same time. I love that Shane's sitting there making eggs. And Emily's like, fuck your dad's eggs. We're calling DoorDash. I know. Seriously. So where Shannon, Heather and Jen Sweet and Gina shows up, she's like, I got up early and I'm still riding a high from the club.

Because I went to the club last night. And Gina showed them how to like fist pump and everything. And it was a great time had by all. Yeah. Shannon tries to show us her fist bump. I'm saying, oh, God, my underarm, she's, oh, God, my underarm just shook. Did I look fat? Oh, God, just cut that part.

So when we go to Carmela's and Gina's like, oh, we save out here, Carmella, we save. That was so awkward last night. It was awful. How are you feeling? She's like, I feel awful. I mean, the narrative, it was just so far from the truth. I mean, you don't know me. But then to say I left my kids, my kids are everything to me.

I live for my kids. Fascinating. So Gina's like, Gina's like, Vicki told us not to engage against no Carmela the entire time. We were in the car and the way to the Grand Canyon. And like, that was like such a missed opportunity to you to get to no Carmela and what she's like not about,

on what she's about, you know? But I'm sorry, I meant to say, Vicki chose to not engage, not she told us not to engage. So Vig, Carmela's like, if anything, I show my kid what's like to hustle and to work. which I see her doing every single time she asks if she can skip school, you know? And why can you win but no one else can?

Am I right? Yeah, and Jen's like, it's almost like a mentality of like, is it insecurity? I don't even know. I don't even know. She's like, everybody's up here and we're all down here. It's the Housewives classic line.

So now we go to Vicky and Tamara, and Tamara's like, Hey, what happened? That's not with you, Vick. There's just so much yavin. It's the cream, man. Yeah, then you were mom shaming Carmela and calling her a bad mom? I mean, bad, Vicky.

Because so funny. Don't you that, Vicky. It's so good, Vicky. I admit, I know she's a good mom. She's freaking out because she's away from the kids. She's been in college. She's been wanting to go home. Because, like, well, of course, I mean, I appreciate, like, that she's a good mom.

But, like, I'm looking from the outside in, and I feel like Carmella is, like, buying her way into all this. Like, I'll employ you. I'll give you a vibrator. A Chanel purse. Did you not employ Lori wearing? for like several years at your insurance agency. Like people do things for people.

Yeah, but that was before Lori was a housewife, wasn't it? Wasn't Lori a real housewife in season two? Season one, didn't she just work for Vicky? And then she's just a friend of? I think so. But I don't know. I watched it so long ago. It's a 20th year anniversary.

So who knows. But I think she was someone who worked for Vicky and then became a real housewife because she was kind of popular. But I don't know. I think she was, I think she was originally, the original cast was Vicki, Gina, Joe, Lori, Kimberly Bryant. So she was probably. My facts are just off today. Poor Lori is still on her way to Las Vegas or on the way to the Grand Canyon.

I know. I know. Your brain's just a little tired from all that driving. It's just done a lot of driving. But then I remember when the second year, when Vicky was all. pissed because Lori was like all full of herself now. And Vicky was the one and gave her the opportunity in the first place. And then Lori met George.

Yeah. Biggie and Rico. Rich rich. A lot of money. Yeah. Okay. So Vicki's like, you know, I take it slow with new people because not everybody's truthful. You're one of the biggest liars on this show, Vicki.

You are one of the biggest proven liars, like one of the lowest of all of the liars on this show with your cancer scamming ass. So he's like, I've been through it with boyfriends. I believed everything they'd tell me in reality when it wasn't, when I would bring paperwork to reunions that were talking about my boyfriend's cancer and it was just gobbledygook and Lorham I'mgum over and over again. I fell for it. I fell for it.

You helped him. You did. She's a liar, Vicky. I know, she is. Kill a lot of cancer. So Carmelah. Carmella's like, you know, she's like, well, I guess it softens the blow a little bit that I'm not the only person that Vicky has targeted, but there needs to be like a level of accountability taken and you're a grown-ass woman fucking act like it. So everyone gets ready because guess what today's going to be?

A scavenger hunt organized by Heather DeRoe. So it's going to be extra, extra fun. So everyone get ready because if you thought the fun and game, were done for the episode because normally there's fun and games in only one part of an episode. You're in luck. We're getting fun and games in a second part of the episode because there's nothing really going on. Yeah. So let's see. Scavenger Hunt. They go to downtown, Las Vegas. And they talk about how wacky this is going to be. They do Fremont Street and all that stuff. And Heather is so fun. I've even made you all beauty sashes that say funny names like Vicky the Verminator or, you know,

Titty Tamara or Gina, the poor one. So cute. Emily, snuffle up, I guess. It's a compliment. So, why is my sasha size eight? really aren't my feelings. Elizabeth Bender designed that one. It's not my fault. So they do this scavenger hunt. I'm sure it was super amusing for them.

You know, we do fun things like hire an Alfredo, or put an Alfredo in a private bus that goes directly to my house, or hire another Alfredo, things like that. Yeah, it was a white. wacky scavenger hunt and they also have zip lining on Freeman Street, a Fremont Street. So Shannon and Vicky decide they have not just had one, that one wacky zip lighting scene isn't enough.

They're going to do another zip lining scene. And it's going to be 10 times the wacky. Yeah, they're really going to do it this time. So they do, there's their, their zip lining. And this is after Vicky crashes her scooter into like a display in some Choshky shop, by the way.

So they do it. And they land and they get to, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they're not sure if there was a winner of the scavenger hunt. This is the second scavenger hunt we've seen in a week on Bravo, by the way. It's, I don't know if it's great TV. Um, but for some reason, here's what I'd love. Afterwards, Juni goes, guys, okay, because I feel like we hit the jackpot. I've got one more trick up my sleeve. I organized us a ride home. So you're thinking, oh, oh. normally on a real housewife show you're thinking it'll be some helicopter or something lux. But for Gina, she got them an oversized shopping cart that they have to crawl into and ride back to Caesar's Palace. I'm not sure what the point of this vehicle is. It doesn't do anything differently than a double-decker bus or any sprinter van. It's just something shaped like a shopping cart. Well, finally I understand how they fit a horse in a cart, so that's good.

I probably did learn something this episode. Of course, Gina would be the one who could only afford a vehicle that doesn't have all its walls. Yeah, Gina. She's like, all right, ladies, sit down. This is all right. This isn't moving. It's just a tiger that you put a nickel into, and it's vibrating me. Well, after we're done going to the moon on this special speech, ship, we're going to get into Kotzil.

I mean, poor Heather. You can just imagine how they'll be like, oh, Cartzilla, this seems like fun. I often ride a Cartzilla to Sevens of Eleven's. Okay, great. I love this. I'm a joiner. Can we stop by the $30 store? I want to get something poor.

Excuse me. Does this Cartzilla have another floor? Is there a dining room? room where there may be some more d'urves laid out for us. No. Oh, okay. Now we go to Caesars. Everybody gets ready to go out and have fun.

And Carmela facetimes Danny. And her kid has a towel wrapped around her head because she's sick, guys. She's not sick, by the way. Anybody who has ever helped raise a child or been a child and knows faking sick, this one is faking sick. She's like, oh, I've got a towel on my head, mom. Can I go to school at noon? tomorrow because I'm basically sick still.

She's like, okay, fine. I love you. We'll go to the mall. Well, why would you go to the mall if you're basically sick? If you're basically sick, you're staying in bed. Man. That's right. That doesn't make sense.

You don't go, you don't avoid school because you're sick and then go to a public place instead. Yeah, to get everybody else sick. It's not even about that. It's just like if you don't have the stamina to go to school, then you don't have the stamina to go to the mall. Okay. You're staying home and you're watching three o'clock high on VHS. So we wind up now. You're going to watch another world in days of our lives in Santa Barbara.

Like every poor sick child should be forced to do. Yeah, you're going to watch daytime television. That was always the worst part. When you stayed home sick, you're like, yes, I get to stay home sick. And then all the TV actually sucks so much. You're like, oh, it's like Donahue. I stayed sick all the time just so I could watch all those shows. I mean, I know I leaned from Days of Our Lives back in those days.

And Lisa Rina, I used to actually watch that in live time, guys. Also, I refused to go to PE, which I've told you a million times. And that was right before Lynch. So I would walk over to my grandma's house and watch Days of Our Lives in another world for those two hours. So I was huge on daytime TV. I fucking loved it. So I was like, I had to know what happens with Marlena. I would watch daytime TV, but I would really just flip through the channels waiting for like a shirtless guy to show up.

I was like, is that one, is that one, shirtless no is that one shirtless no actually this one day shirtless yet no yeah what you do it's like when you go when you go shopping and you go to the underwear section just to see guys in their tight underwear just gotta get guys on your tied underwear yeah um and then i play that no of course so uh let's go to no boo last dinner in Vegas so they all go they all show up and vicky tells carmela like i owe you in a sincere apology um and she's like you know i didn't mean to come off so strong. You've been through hurt. I've been through hurt. Your hurt is a little faker than my hurt, but that's okay. I don't trust a lot of people in my life. And it takes a lot,

you know, and I verify and trust. I trust and verify. That's what I do. Yeah, I hate people like this who are like, you know, it just takes a lot. Like, you really have to work for my friendship. Yeah. Good luck with that. I don't, I don't need to do that. Just go away. Like, be nice or fucking go away work to be Vicky's friend. Who gives a fuck of your Vicki's friend? Get the fuck out of here, cancer scammer. So back at the table, they're like, uh-oh, what's going on of this? Should we say if she looks scared?

Because Tamara was standing up there too. And they're like, Tamara, get away from the table. We need to talk to you. Because they wanted them to have a private conversation. And then Vicky just keeps going on and on with this. It's not a bad apology. But then she tells us, she's like, yeah, basically the girls are making me apologize to this girl.

So I'm doing it. Like, I don't get it, but whatever. I'll do it. They're all making me do it. So. Yeah. So it's just as insincere as we could have imagined, right? So she's like, I just want all those ladies stop yapping in my ears.

I'll apologize. And then let's see where it goes. She goes, well, I'm embarrassed that I would make you feel that way. And I've got to make it up to you. And I'm sorry. So Vicki, who's so concerned about people being fake, is the one who's actually being the fakes right now. Yeah. So then we go to dinner.

everybody's eating and Vicky announces that she apologized and Carmel is like, thank you because I really do love my kids, you know. And then also I recognize in this guy's Danny. He's being, he's just trying so hard. He's just doing such a good job. He's taking the care of the kids and he's making a steak the way I do so they don't miss my steak. I mean, it's just so sweet. Like, oh my God, that's so nice. And she's like, maybe I do need to soften. You know, infidelity it hardens you with a person you love being vulnerable should be a beautiful thing and i look at it like the enemy because i can't protect myself if i'm vulnerable i'm like ditch him sorry ditching find someone else who'll not cheat on you and won't tell little white lies all over the place

well do you think you if you soften you're doing it for him because if i if you know if you softened you're doing it for yourself you know i had to do that with shane because i was so pissed as Shane and i had so much resentment and we wouldn't talk for weeks and it was bad and then he was overwhelmed with kids and all this stuff and then i made the first move you know what i mean now look how happy we are yeah the previews are like i can't stand shane i'm leaving shane fuck shame Camilla's like, it's just hard to make the first move. Like, yeah, it is. Because I'm probably like you.

I would call myself a hard ass too, because I'm always intense. I've always been like that. You know me. Emily, quote unquote, orders door toash her daughter. Intense Emily. But I do know that Shane would like it if I showed more gratitude and initiated more things. And I need to do that more. Yeah.

Are you going to do Taco Tuesday? And they're like, what's that? Well, it's Tuesday and I've got a taco in my purse. That's a syringe. Shut up. It's my lifestyle. Isn't she supposed to be doing like movie night or something after Wifswap? Wasn't it like the deal?

Like, the family gets together and watches a movie together. We eat at the same table. Well, Tamara had Maked Tuesday with Eddie. So I thought that's what they were talking about. I don't remember what Emily's was on Wiveswomen. remember either. All I do know is that I don't think that like the off the grid lady from Idaho was much of a help for poor Angie. That didn't work out so well, her advice. So Eddie is, uh, we see like Eddie a flashback to Tamara's naked Tuesday or whatever. And we see Eddie saying,

hey, all our kids are gone. Maybe our new hobby is walking around the house naked and seeing what happens. Like a Tuesday, bitch. Yeah. So basically Tamara's like, I'm not in the mood. I'm not the only thing in the world right now, guys. I don't know. I don't want to do testosterone palettes, but, you know, I guess I got to break out the laundry. You're some sexy. It's really hard in my age.

I don't want to do it. I think the secret is you have to schedule it. So Shank goes, so you're saying, so do you just say tonight? No, no, no. I set up an ICAL, and I have an alarm. And it says, do me at 8. PM, thank you. Then I put an apple in his mouth and say, good boy, Alfredo, now go away.

Did I say too much? Or, you know, and Shannon's like, what do you do? Just say, tonight? We're doing it tonight? Well, sometimes Terry will say, hey, honey, it's been a minute. And I go, yeah. Or I'll say it to him. Or then when we're having sex, I say, Terry, it's been a minute.

And then he climbs off me and walk. It's way dejected. I don't make plans for sex because it probably should like would get canceled because I'm like so busy. Like if I planned to have Tuesday at like four o'clock and I'm not hung by four, then like what's the point of planning it? Right? Like how about Tuesday at 9 p.m instead of 4 p.m.? She's like, I always initiate. He will never deny me, but I'm always initiating sex.

And there's like, we know. We know. Stand down. Sorry, that's what I say to Terry when he tries to go off the schedule. But if you're not taking care of your bad, somebody else will. And my mama taught me. My mama taught me that. And, you know, my work's really hard, really long, and he's getting older.

And so now I just have to say, take off your pants. Just take them off. We're going to do it. Who do I got to rub it up with the woo-hoo? I don't know. You guys are the same, right? It's going to be our T-shirt soon. Then we fuck.

We fuck really hard. They're like, okay. All right. So then Tamara they say, Shannon, hey, hey, pleasure with yourself, because we all know you're so alone. and just stand about it and I'm pulling shit and got nobody nobody so it's dark and alone and Shannon's where are you too depressed to masturbation and what's going on with people I'm good I'm good I'm good I do not masturbate especially especially here being so close to an elevator it's just not it's just I don't I would not like to

talk about this thank you yeah you got to put yourself that day because not you know not everybody hates alcoholic, you know, sometimes people like them. They even have meetings where they all go up. It's usually like singles meetings. You should probably go there and be like, hi, my name is Shannon. I'm desperate. I hear they have chips. Can I tell you something, though?

Shannon, after knowing you for so many years, you have never been with anyone that deserves you. They just can't drink up as much as you, ever. You have not found the love of your life, and you have not met the person. yet, and you're such a special person, and you deserve all of that. The only thing I worry about for you is that you always go, I'm okay by myself, and I'm doing this. See, look at me being a good friend.

I will stay in my room. Thank you in advance. You know, I am okay. I just love being alone. I love it. I love going to get dogs, ice cream cones, like that, dropping them, having them fall all over the street. That's real fine. But, you know, I am starting to, you know, it's like the other day, I said, I don't have anybody to go home to. Like, if I'm going to need to complain about you guys, there's nobody to listen to me. So I am starting to feel lonely.

Well, you deserve to have a person to come home to bitch about all of this. Unfortunately, you can't afford an Alfredo. So, you know, find a Terry. I was kind of thinking, what about that twin from the Hogan's family, not Jason Bateman, the, other one. He's probably single. Should we get him for you? I don't even understand that proposition. But the girls are right. It's time for me to start dating. There have been quite a few occasions recently where I came home. And I'm talking to the dogs. I need to get out there. So they're like, like, yeah, Tamara, you got a, you got to date again. Okay. Get out there. Yeah. Like, go ahead,

Shannon. Shannon. Tammer's like, just say, I'm open to the universe. Bring me a penis. Instead of a martini. Maybe it'll work like that. We've been in Vegas for too long. We got to go home. Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. See you next week, America. And that is it for Real Housewives of Olmonds County.

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