Watch What Crappens - #3560 RHONY S16E4 Part One: I Bid You Adieu

Episode Date: September 30, 2026

This is part one of a two-part recapErin tries to have a moment on Real Housewives of New York, but Hailey swiftly chops her down! Meanwhile, Carole invites the women to a charity auction, and Martha Stewart feeds a child. We’re back on tour Oct 3! Get our In the Mix tickets for your city at watchwhatcrappens.com. To watch this recap on video, listen to our bonus episodes, sign up for our free weekly newsletter and get ad free listening, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. Find bonus episodes at patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens and follow us on Instagram @watchwhatcrappens @ronniekaram @benmandelker Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello and welcome to watch watch crapins, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me today in a bright yellow shirt that will set the tone for the very rest of this year. It's Ronnie Karam. Hi, Ronnie. How's it going? How dare you come from my yellow shirt when it traumatized me when I was one year's old? Yes. It's a very bright shirt. You know, it's one of those things that on the internet, it was like, oh, that could be cute. And then in real life, it's like, well, holy.

So what am I an exclamation on Batman? As she would say on this show, am I on Adam West's Batman? Boom. Bam. That's right. We're talking about Roney today, which is very exciting. Can't wait to dive into that. Also, very importantly, we are starting our tour.

this weekend on Saturday we're going to Kansas City and recapping the real housewives of salt lake city the one that's going to be airing tonight and then on sunday sunday sunday sunday we will be in chicago and we're going to be recapping the real housewives of orange county and it's funny i was thinking to myself why have there not been more cast trips to chicago there've been so many cast trips to really every city i mean even milwaukee got a cast trip why are we not getting anything from Chicago. I think the only thing we actually got was Vicky herself going to Chicago in like season four or something of Orange County. So justice for Chicago. And you know what? We can all complain about it together. Tickets are at watch what crappins.com. We can't wait to see

you all this weekend. Come celebrate the kickoff of the In the Mix Tour, which will also be leading up to our 15 year anniversary. So go check that out later in the month, later in October, which starts tomorrow, which is crazy. We've got a show in Minneapolis. and in Detroit. And then we have a whole slate of cities, tons and tons of cities that we're going to. Culminating in New York City, the grand finale will be at the Golden Crappies in February.

So make sure you do not miss out. The tickets are selling very nicely. Thank you, everyone who bought a ticket. And we will see you on the road. That is the spiel. We're really excited. I'm so excited to go back up front of an audience. Me too.

I can't wait. I'm really excited. It's, you know, I've got to work myself up to it. I'm walking around the counter of the kitchen, and then I'm walking around the counter and the table. And then tomorrow I'm going to walk maybe around the counter and the table and maybe the couch until I can. Just remember what it's like.

Yeah, I have to remember to pack the tablecloth, the famous tablecloth into my luggage. I'm really scared I won't because I'm flying back tonight, back to L.A. And then I'm going to be in L.A. for about 24 hours and flying off to Kansas City. And so as I transfer to like a smaller bag, I'm like, please don't forget the tablecloth.

So we'll see. I transfer to a smaller bag. Well, I've had this giant bag. I know. We're going to reboot the bag. I've been this enormous bag for three weeks. I've been living out of a bag for three weeks. And I am really excited to just get to a non-checked bag.

But I'm excited for you because I know that bag changing is like a, is a good part of your year. You love a new bag changing and organizing all the cords in each little specific pocket. Oh my goodness, you don't even know. My backpack has been doing, well, you're right, because I am going to also change my backpack. I've had my big deal traveling around for three weeks backpack, and I'm going to go to my svelte little weekend trip backpack. And I'm really excited. You're actually so right about that. I'm like, ooh, what goes in what pocket?

Yeah, I know. I love it. I can't wait for you to show me. Because you're like, look at this, and then this zipper opens all the way up, and then it comes out, and then this board goes in this thing. It will happen. I have just one question for coffee companies. Why does coffee go so fast? I literally just made this.

And look, it's already one inch. It's done. Well, you, I feel like I drink coffee fast if it's anything but black. If it's black coffee, I sip it all day long. But the moment I have any sort of dairy or sugar in it, it's gone in a second. It's probably because it tastes better. That's basically a huge chocolate milk with a couple shots of decaffe in it. Yeah, I'll tell you what's not going fast is our introduction.

So today we are talking. And also we're doing a little bit early today, so I just crawled out of bed. And I'm like, what's the deal with coffee? Coffee. Ronnie and I did not have our customary pre-show banter. We usually sign on and just sort of like shoot the shit for like five minutes. We'll gossip or we'll be like, did you read about this? And I was like, I've got a plane to catch Ronnie.

We're starting. But you know what, though? Life finds a way. It sure does. Banter finds a way. Okay, let's get into it. are here to hear about Real Housewives of New York City, not my coffee levels, which is now depleted. But Real Housewives of New York, 16, Episode 4, Gloves Off!

The Gala! Yeah, I was not here last week, to recap the show. You know, I love making a statement. And, God, the way I have hated, hated, hated the errone reboot has been so pure. And so it's like I've got a clean vision for it. You know, sometimes I'm like, I don't like this, but I think people, like, no, I've always hated the reboot. And let me tell you something, people.

I think that right now, Roney is actually the best real housewives that's on Bravo right now. Can you believe it? Can you, I can't even believe these words coming out of my mouth. And it's not a disrespect to the other two. I think that Roney is really good right now. What do you think? Well, I don't think it's better than Salt Lake City. I do think it's better than Noste this year.

but I think they're doing a great job. And I was laughing my ass off at this episode. I love that Jessel is triggering the world. I feel like the audience is like, oh, I'm just so offended. I think she's absolutely hilarious. Absolutely. I'm liking all of them, actually. I do owe an apology to the audience because I kept saying cedar last week.

I just kept reading it as cedar. Yes, of course I know better. Cedar is that a sater? Over and over. Yes. And apparently, Brian Moreland was saying cedar. Sater, and I kept saying Cedar, I don't know why, guys. I went to Hebrew school with my little best friend David Bowman back in the day.

I don't know why I would do. Cedar. It was not a microaggression. It was just aggressively stupid, I guess. It was a Mata aggression. Mata aggression. Yeah. I don't know what it was, but sorry Sater lovers.

Don't worry, as the resident Jew on the podcast, I'll be here to correct you every time you say Cedar. I have to say that... I will say 10 more times today. Yeah. I do think this show... I mean, it's unfair to compare this to Salt Lake City. Salt Lake City's only had two episodes, and one of them was a very, very serious and sad one. And I haven't watched this week's Salt Lake City yet.

So it's really not fair to say it. But it's also fun to make a big splashy statement, and I will always do that if I can. But I do think that Roney is, like, hilarious. And I think it's... Like, I find myself cracking up. I find myself, like, really... excited to see what these people are doing. I think they've sort of gotten back to the, what's, to making a show that's focused

on funny moments and camp and the post-production seems focused on pulling out those moments. And the tone is no longer like, look at how fabulous we are. We are fashion. We are New York City in 2025. We are everything. It's like not doing that. And I think it's, it had the totally right pivot. And I think Lori from Salt Lake City was moved over to it.

is that what I've seen her name on the credits, and I heard that she's moved over there. I don't know if she was, Lori Gordon, I don't know if she was there previously. And her expertise, I believe, is showing. She's guiding the show brilliantly. Yeah, you know, they could go a little further with getting rid of some of the original.

Sye is still not really doing it for me, but there are so many other people who are. Yeah. I think the show has taken more of a fun tone, and Sye is still keeping it in a very like every I'm gonna have a super dramatic scene about horrible things and I'm like we've already heard this a and B it's not that it's not sad but everyone else is having so much fun I mean even Aaron is is flooding her house that was fun that was fun of her to flood it for fans of Aaron you know to see her house

get flooded so I don't know that's my that's my only real complaint is like I need more fun side I actually have no problem with sigh I actually have no problem with sigh I I thought she really improved last season, and I'm totally fine with her. She does not bother me whatsoever. And I think Erin is still a drip, but I love that the show is now being upfront about that and acknowledging it.

And then that's actually the dialogue around Aaron is that she's a bore, because I think previously, the show was trying to be like, isn't she fabulous? Isn't she just so cutting and witty and hilarious? And now the show is like, yeah, you're, you're you're a big womp-womp Aaron and so that's like really good that really works and that makes Aaron more of a villain and now I think that Aaron has actually like Aaron now has the lane that she has always needed so Aaron's working well in her lane strangely enough I think Haley I had some reservations about Haley initially I'm no longer have the reservations I'm happy I'm a happy man and the fact that we've actually gotten so much Martha Stewart I thought we were just going to get her that one time and that was going to be it and Martha Stewart oh my God She is so funny. I was obsessed with this entire Martha Stewart scene today. But anyway, maybe we should just get into it and people encounter this.

What is that a child? What is your child needs? So hello child, you need something? What is that your daughter? Oh, it's your son. Well, whose mistake is that? Mine or yours really? Okay, you want food, water?

Give her somebody of your water. Give her some of that water. Just hand it down to her. She treated that child like a passing dog. She was like she did she literally made that noise went Hello hello how we get a hot water can we get a pop cup for this daughter son please thank you I literally rewound it to make sure there wasn't a dog off camera that I couldn't see and I was like no they actually she was actually calling out to the child when she was like I was like what brilliant all right so we open at daisy's Passover Seder which is where we left off last

time because Aaron heard that she was called Jam and she came in with one of her prepared reads that she worked in. Yes. She worked on in the car multiple times and you could tell how she read it because she's like, well, you called me Jam? I would rather be called Jam than be the woman that broke up a marriage with eight children. Wow. You should have written yourself a shorter line.

because that was incredibly awkward getting that out. I know. And then of course, you know, Haley, of course, takes the bait.

Well, it's not really take the bait, but it is sort of taking the bait because Haley is like, first of all, huh, ha, ha, ha, ha,

and they're like, why are you breathing like that? You're supposed to come back with me with an insult is supposed to be a scene. And Haley's like, oh, oh, ha, ha,

this is fucking bullshit again. It's not true. And it's extraordinarily hurtful. And Aaron has pushed me too far at this point don't fuck with me and she's got i think she got like fresh um fresh lips before she came into the season because she doesn't know how to work them right yet and it's so funny to watch her because she's got like fresh botox and fresh lips so nothing moves on

her except her lips and then spit starts coming out of her lips when she doesn't know it and like hanging off her mouth i don't know if you noticed that during i did see this like i saw oh oh no there was like a spit web that was there i think we talked about it in the trailer when we did trailer trash. We analyzed that she had like that. Saliva, the saliva stalactites happening. Yeah. Oh, yeah. So that's what's happening now. And she's like, at 22, I got accused of homewrecking Haley. That's what they call me everywhere, homerick and Haley. And it wasn't true. And it's unfortunate you've never been through something like that where the whole world

is placing a judgment and placing a false narrative on something that never happened. because it changes you and it does something to you. Ah, wah. I have no doubt that Haley went through a monstrous time in her 20s because of this scandal. But I think what's funny to me is that, like, I only have wisps of a memory of her in the tabloids. Like, I remember John 8 plus 8, like, that was a peak thing of the late 2000s. I remember when they broke up.

But, like, she sort of is talking as if this is Monica. Lewinsky level and honestly yeah I just don't remember her like that I remember she was a rant I remember it was a thing but she's like I lost my entire 20s to it I was like was this like a 10 year scandal that happened like I just don't remember it that way yeah but I guess what's when it's all the magazines and stuff ragging on you wherever you go it it gets you I mean I can understand the trauma I just don't understand how you're ever so young and so stupid because I talk about all on this show how young and stupid I was all the time. And usually I'm referring to like two weeks ago.

But how are you ever young and dumb enough to date somebody with eight children when you're 22? I mean, that's just crazy. That's like whether or not he was on TV or famous, he's still that lump. He's still that lump on a log. And wear those tie-dye shirts. He has got eight children.

Oh. Yeah, yeah, definitely not. Well, I mean, we are finding out that then this is the coercion of her mother, which is what this is gonna pivot to the rest of the season i imagine but even then i mean you can you can still i don't know you can figure out a way so yeah i mean i have no doubt that the trauma of being you know hounded by the tabloids definitely haunted her through the 20 her through her 20s but it is funny because she is

sort of carrying on like this was a thing that like hung in pop culture for years and years and years and years and years and I'm like I feel like I'm pretty good remembering these sort of things and I I yeah this is Brad Pitt leaving Jennifer Aniston for Angelina Jolie this is no Brad Pitt just watching the pit I mean it's just like it was like a thing that happened like 20 years ago so but the so I guess what's funny about it to me is that like I appreciate that she's sharing the trauma that she felt but there's sort of an element that she's almost elevating the scandal back into the spotlight and like, oh my God, it was a terrible time, a terrible time for me. Remember, remember when I was in the tabloids? It was a terrible time. It was a terrible time.

Yeah, like, please don't speak to me about it. It's the most dramatic thing I ever happen. By the way, did I show you this magazine cover on TikTok? It was, I mean, everywhere. It's homewrecking Haley's summer. I mean, everybody's doing it. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappin's commercial. Jessel, who clearly doesn't know what she's talking about, but wants to be on Haley's side because she's against Aaron. Jussel's like, oh, I actually heard this story, I believe. And thank you for sharing that with me because, no, no, Aaron, you're a fucking piece of shit. She's like, why would you come from me, you call me boring?

Why would you call me boring, though? But you call me too, but you call me boring. And she's got those wide eyes when Aaron is just like, I'm correct about it. out something. Oh my gosh, you got called jam. And you know, to be fair, Haley's trauma is, you know, having an affair with a guy with eight children. And Aaron's trauma is being called jam. So, you know what? It's a trauma. It's a trauma off. I mean, I won't lie. I went to a diner yesterday and they had the stack of jams. And I thought of Aaron. And I'm not even trying to be funny. Like, not like, oh, is that funny? I was literally like, oh, yeah, the jams like Aaron. And that's

gonna stick i have to say i think that's gonna stick because i'm never gonna look at strawberry jams those that little stack of jams again without being like oh yeah this is the stack of boring people right here it was a great metaphor by haley so then erin's with that i could do without it but of course everyone did use the jam so errand's yeah erin says like why would you why would you come for me and call me boring why it's because you're boring and you demand a lot of it's not that you demand a lot of attention but people have to shoot scenes with you and they have to go to your house and like use up their wine and talk to you and you're boring so that's why she complains about it and haley why do people call it damp outside it's damp outside you know it's just that's that's exactly right that's the next level you're you're like damp outside it's just just like getting damping why would they call me boring i don't know erin maybe you should rewind three seasons and watch them like the rest of us the question is is in here apparently boring why would you call me boring because you just asked that question so Haley is like you took a situation that took me as a young girl that fucking

ruined my life she's like first of all it's all out there it's not true you post about it no I don't and then like you said just was like no she doesn't just knows no idea what's happening she's just happy for an ally and I just want to say because I forgot to come back to this you started to say it in the intro we said the other day I do not understand the people clutching their pearls about Jessel these days. Like, like everyone who clutches their pearls about Jessel, just remember you're basically aligning with Aaron right now. Because like Jessel is so funny and like she is so cringy.

And that is the point. She's supposed to be cringy. Like this is what we have been missing. Rony is about cringy tone deaf moments. Jessel is doing what she's supposed to be doing. And that is being ridiculous. Yeah. Well, you have talked I'm not every day. Like, you're like, look at this magazine cover. I'm on the cover and this magazine color. I'm looking at this. And she's like, what are you?

What are you? And then she looks right at the camera. She goes, no, I don't. Spit. The spit's making a star on her face. And Daisy's like, uh-huh, a TikTok. She goes, a tip-top from the summer. And then they correct her.

They're like, a tip-top. And Jess is like, no, it's a TikTok. TikTok. So Aaron, you're showing all the magazine covers that she were on. You didn't die. I looked at your TikTok. And so we see Aaron and she's like, oh, here it is. Look, and it all has to be blurred out.

But we see that there's some sort of video showing cover after cover. And everyone's like, every magazine cover. That's like, well, that's because she's allowed to talk about her magazine cover. But you just shamed her for that. It's not like you just brought it up. I'm sure if you asked her questions like, hey, tell us about that time. She would have talked with you about it. But you actually shamed her and called her a homewrecker.

So, of course she's going to have a reaction. Well, yeah, that's what Aaron does. She'll take one little thing and then twist it. So she's like, why are you mad at me? It's out there. She's mad at you because you're calling her a dumb homewrecking sled. That's why. Yeah.

As someone who was offended by Jam, surely you would understand. Yes, exactly. With this. Exactly. And Haley's like, I mean, I came for you. Jam on the fucking table. And Aaron's like, is that nice? That's nice. That's supposed to be nice.

See, your point is so good. Like, why is Aaron shocked that Haley is offended when Aaron herself is furious about being equated to smuckers? Yeah. At least I'm not slut, Jam. At least I didn't steal the bagels family. She's like, no, fuck you, Aaron. Fuck you. Jam.

That's nice to say. Jam, this is how we talk. You make up shit. What did I make up? You make shit up. And that one, Jessel over there. You know, you make stuff up about her, and I see how she moves with, I see how you move with this group. I see how you move with this group.

I don't know that you know me very well, but I'm a you are fighter. So if you say I move shady, I'm going to say you move shady. That's how it goes. So you are, you are. You are a lying ass snake of a bitch, and you're a garden snake, and I'm a fucking mongoose. So watch your fucking back, and I'm not the one to fuck with. Cut to all the women at the table, quietly looking on their phone. What is mongoose?

Siri, what is a mongoose? What is a mongoose, and why would people compare themselves to one? It's not the most flattering... It's not the most flattering comparison, porn to me. Is a mongoose just some sort of goose that's from the Caribbean? Hey, mong, goose. So, uh... Aaron, now they're like...

It's a reggae. Is it a reggae goose? So Haley is furious. She's like, I quit, I quit. I'm going. At this point, her, like, her saliva web is really going strong in the corner of her mouth. So she starts to get up. And then Haley is, he's like, Erin, you're a weak-ass bitch, and you come after lying about everybody, and you come after people. She's like, I don't lie about anything. This is all out. Yes, you do, because it doesn't matter, because you're always going to play the victim. And I was like, thank God. Thank God someone is saying this. I've been waiting two years and a half

years for this. And then Aaron's thing is a U.R. Like, she'll give a U-R fight. And then her other thing is just making a question of the last thing you said. Which is where she does now. I'm the victim. I'm playing the victim. How am I playing the victim? I'm a victim.

And Daisy's like, stop, guys. Stop. I spent so much money on the food. But you came for me. We didn't even eat, guys. I worked so hard on this food. So Haley sits back down. I think Carol's like, Um, I think what she's saying is that they're not comparable.

Being told you're boring and then being told you broke up in marriage with eight kids, it's just not the same. Aaron is not able to really process that. So Haley just decides. She just, she has a storm off. She pulls the mic off. She goes out the front door. She goes down the sidewalk. Society goes to go follow her little high, high waters, her pants.

I don't know why I thought that was so funny. But she's like, I'm walking down the street. She's in little little high waters storming down the street. Doesn't know where to go, by the way. And I love Erica, who's been like, Erica is sort of like a non-entity, but I actually like her. And she's like, yeah, this is why I like waspy holidays, because everyone just suppresses their emotions,

which I thought was funny. So then Sygos and Chies down Haley, and she's like, So, Haley, Haley, you know what? You stood up for yourself. That's what you need to do. You need to stand out for yourself sometimes. Good for you. Get back in the ring. Go call a boring more. That was fun. We all loved it. And Aaron Mee-Wall's like, well, I didn't think it was going to go that way. I mean, it's her claim to fame. I thought it would be good.

And Carol's like, yeah, but it's not the same. Who cares if she called you boring? I mean, who cares? But I mean, it's out there, Carol. Yeah, but you're not going to get any sympathy for me. of course I feel about that she's upset and this darn it because Haley was talking shit about me behind my bag with friends and all I heard was these rumblings and people like chit-chatting and snickering at me and saying oh look there's a jam that was hurtful what is this fun is this not hurtful and I had I known about it I would have gotten over it but if you're going to be sneaky

I'm not down with that uh yeah she said that because you were walking around the party saying she got her nose broken by a dildo or by a boob while she was being dildoed and then told her girlfriend that so it's not like you didn't do anything yeah exactly started it you're being very indelicate with with gossip with gossip or like she told you something privately and then you went told the girl like that she came with okay you could have messed up her booty that's not good so sigh is like hey haley come on no one knows your story you gotta tell people and haley's like i've been fighting my whole life and it never happened. I never was a home record. I know, but you have to understand Haley for a very long time.

All we had was the media side. We never had your side. And no one knew on that side of your stories. You gotta get out there, you don't tell people. You know, Haley is suffering from a little PTSD, so to bring it up, it really negatively affects her. Aaron was wrong for that. Yeah, I'm gonna be honest when I met you, I thought you're a crazy bitch, but I love you now, Because you're a crazy bitch. So there, let's go eat together. Come on. But that's someone who ruined my life.

They took my 20s. Where's my 20s? They're dead. Come on. No one. I don't let anybody ruin your shit. Okay, that's up to you. Come on, free food.

What are you talking about? I know you got a bad time in the 20s, but Mazzar bowl soup. Come on now. So you're about to go eat some free food with zero salt. Okay? Zero salt. There's no salt. on this food come in don't you want to enjoy your saitor at 1 p.m. in the afternoon come on so they go inside

and uh daisy's like oh my god i have anxiety and just is like are you okay can i help with anything i'm a good person and daisy's like no it's just that i worked so hard to make this i was like did you work so hard i feel like last week wasn't the footage of like someone else making all this food for you it might just miss remembering that ronnie yeah Yeah, it was someone who works for her making the food. And now she's got the driver back there serving the food. So Daisy's like, well, I'm serving muscle ball soup. The Tudor loves it.

Like, whoa, it's uncomfortable. Well, I love a bowl in my mouth, which I don't believe for a second. And Daisy's like, yeah, you're going to have some really good balls in your mouth, baby. So now they're all sat, except for Haley. Haley sits down for a second, but Aaron's just still staring at her like, jam, this is nice. This is nice. You call me, Jam? And so Haley is like, I'm going to the bathroom.

Now I'm very uncomfortable. And Sigh's like, do you want a sponge? You want one of my sponges for your makeup? She's like, is my makeup bad? And someone else is like, no, it looks fine. She's like, take a sponge. Just take this whole bag. Please.

Just take the whole bag, please. The entire bag is a sponge. You need all, everything that's in this bag, you need it. Just go in the bag. there and just do something so then just so gives her bag and daisy's like oh my god dale dale come in here dale and dad dale we find out is her driver and her server and everything he does everything so disappointing i mean who else was hoping it was just going to be tinsley's mom be like hello i've been waiting to be summoned that's the deal i want to see

Dale Cooper It's not her name Dale Cooper Wait what was her name Dale No Dale Cooper is from something Yeah Dale Cooper I think is a porn star

Who is Dale? What was her last name? Dale Mercer Dale Mercer I'm just here to remind everybody On this fabulous Sater That Tinsley is still a mess All right

Can I put that on my tip top? That would be funny I'm gonna do a tip top Of all the magazine covers Haley, that my daughter is no longer on. How about that? Isn't this sad? Look at this us weekly. No more Tinsley. She's happy somewhere. Poor thing. Oh, bless her heart. So then we have this like Dale moment where he does everything and it's like funny. And then and then the Monsal bowl soup comes out and Carol's like, Daisy, this soup is just a tiny bit of salt. Just a little bit of salt. I was like, man, that must be some bland soup. if even Carol's like, it needs a little bit of seasoning. I actually remember it being sigh, who's like, this needs salts.

And everybody looked at her like, you got it, that you guys were supposed to be French. Like, but it does. It needs a little bit of salt. What you can do? Well, either way, now it's just like awkward, sitting around the table and everything. And Jessel announces that this is her first time

eating Monsabal soup. And she's like, yeah, I don't really get the Monsabal soup. soup thing. It's gray and then the ball of meat is gray and it's just like not very appealing to me. The producer's like it's not meat. Oh, I thought it was a meatball. I wasn't

eating a meatball. No, no Jessel. She's like, oh, oh, that kind of changes it a bit in my head then. She never asks what it is. So she's still going to just be eating some gray things. She doesn't really know. Motsabal soup is amazing. I think that

that's the best. It's, in I speaking to you're just trying to make up your excitedly hearing by saying that's like the best thing about the religion is the matzabal soup is that too much? I mean I think it's definitely up there

I think I think it's good. It's good. Motsabal soup is like one of our greatest culinary offerings for sure. I think so too. You know how Christians go around like I'm a Christian, my family's Christian and so we would literally go around door to door as kids or up to people at bars as

my mom would, even when she was still drunk and say, yeah, yeah, you need to meet my friend. Jesus Christ. But anyway, as part of Christianity is walking up to people inebriated and then trying to know they need Jesus. But anyway, if Jews did that, I think that you guys should do it with Matsubal soup. Maybe while a Barberst-Ris-Sand album is playing at the same time, just give them a devil whammy. We give them everything. I'm trying to think of everyone else. We could have a we could show Jurassic Park at the same time be like look look what you can do

I think matzabal soup is the best of the chicken soups I'm not gonna lie I I mean there's not a huge every culture has a chicken soup but I mean matzabal soup is like it's basically just chicken soup but you have a matzabal on there right you've got the ball it's like just it's a nice like well seasoned well here's the thing if the matzabal was not made properly, I can understand why Jessa was not into it. Because if it's not seasoned, it's just like dough. But if you season it properly, it's delicious. Motsubal is amazing.

It's built a religion. So they talk about Motsubal soup for a little while. And Aaron is just still sitting there giving those eyes while Haley cries like, oh, really? But you call me jam? And that's nice. You call me jam? And Haley is like, ugh.

I'm so upset. I'm crying out of my mouth. That is smittle. Wipe that off of your mouth. Wipe it off of your mouth. So then Carol, as long as things are uncomfortable, Carol decides she's going to, you know, clear the air. She's like, Jess, oh, I just want to clear the air because that branch on Sunday,

I will say I left the brunch a little bit early. And I'm struggling with the love story series, obviously. and Carolyn was a real person and a best friend and a cousin and it was a very, very painful summer. And so here's the thing. Carolyn was not an aesthetic. And the Carolyn Beset summer. Oh, so chic. I love Carolyn Beset summer.

Yeah. So it's not a good thing. No, it's a great thing. I agree. I just wish it could have Carolyn Beset all the time. I was wondering, I saw it, I wrote a letter to McDonald's. I said, why don't you have a Carolyn Bessette happy meal? Get the children started with fashion early.

Am I right? You know, the other night I was watching Jeopardy, I mean, it really is everywhere. And they said pantaloons. And I said, was Carolyn Bessette a bitch? That's what I said at home on my couch. And I got it correct. It was a correct answer. She's like, no, it's very offensive, you know.

When I think about her, I don't think about her clothes. I don't think about her aesthetic. It never even occurred to me. that she had one. That's how close we are. She could have been wearing a Ziploc bag with her boobies hanging down and a paper sack as a skirt. And I wouldn't have thought if that as an aesthetic, I would have thought, there's my best friend, famous person and American princess, Carolyn Beset. Do you understand what I'm saying? Well, God, she was wearing a Ziploc bag. She wouldn't have been famous, would she? That would have been hideous.

Oh, God, thank God, she didn't have you helping her with the clothes, Carol. Lord. Did you ever ask Carolyn what her life was like before she married into a family curse? Did she was, did things go well for her before then? Did you ever ask her that? Um, I don't really like this line of questioning. I just meant that you looked chic. That's all. When you were having one of your best friend walks with Carolyn Bessette, your best friends, did you ever happen to stop in the middle of the street and it started raining frogs on your head? No, that is it. That's a, that's it.

biblical curse. Well, I mean, Motser balls, are right? It's a biblical day. Let's just get on with it. Commercials. Here comes one right now. You know, and make these mozzarella balls better. Carolyn Bessert, could we get some Carolyn

beset motser balls around here? I just, I hope I didn't defend you, which is the whole point. Yes, you offended her. And she's like, well, I'm not offending. And, you know, when I think about her, I just, I don't, I just don't, I just don't, think of an aesthetic. She goes, well, all I meant was that you look chic, that's all. So rest to me. Good Lord, sorry for trying to make a compliment.

By the way, Ronnie, congrats to you and Brian Moyland, who elisted it a full on response from Carolyn Radzwell on our Instagram last week after you guys did your recap. It was really funny too. Wow, you guys are really equal opportunity, bitches. Dillity as charged. Carol's like, well, I know. It's just that, you know, I don't want to think about it, you know, as I re-release a book about it and write more blogs about it. I just wanted to clear it with you because I feel like I have a little resentment.

And I don't want the resentment to grow, you know, into something else because I feel like, you know, I feel like it was more think bat vibes than anything. And Jess was like, oh, dingbat. vibes. I mean, let's be fair, she's wearing exactly what Carolyn Bissette would wear. And then we see a clip of Carol walking through the house, just like Carolyn Bessette ringing the doorbell. She's like, ding-dong, I've got a love story to tell you. I called Jocelyn a dingbat because I thought it was actually one of the nicer things I could

have said. There's a certain charm about being a dingbat, and there's no charm in being an idiot and being and sensitive and thoughtless and someone who's never trained for a marathon. So yeah, dingbat vibes. Can I just say in the vein of this, don't ever talk about the Kennedy curse in front of me again. And Jessel's just looking at her like, uh, all right. It's painful, Jessel. Yeah, she lost her husband, you know, Jassel.

I know what happened. I know what happened. I've seen the TV show. Oh, yeah, she knows because she watched it. Yes, I watched the show. Did you watch it to the end? No, not yet, actually. No, no, I haven't.

But then she says like, no, but she goes like, I haven't. But don't, like, she starts to say, don't, don't spoil it. She starts to be like, but don't, don't say. Which is crazy. And Carol was like, I mean, you know how it ends. Okay. Is it that they live happily ever after in the Upper East Side? Does she invent gap?

Does she invent the gap? Fine, I won't talk about the Kennedy curse, even though they're literally about to destroy the Kennedy Center. I mean, how far does this curse go? I just got a headline popped up on my phone. They're dismantling the Kennedy Center. Oh, isn't that nice? I guess that's not linked to anything. That's funny.

So everybody's now looking uncomfortable. What do you think about this whole Carol thing? I get how you wouldn't want to talk about it, but it's a national TV show right now. It's really popular, and that's it. Like, what are you going to do? People are going to talk about it. You literally got back to this show, brought back to this show,

because of all of this stuff being brought back up, and the Epstein Files, you know? I think, I mean, look, I thought it was hilarious. It was so cringy when she brought it up. But the truth is, on a human level, Jessel was being incredibly insensitive. I mean, this was, like, this was her best friend, and she's prattling on about, like, was she a bitch in real life? Oh, my God, what do you think about, like this?

She's sort of treating it like this fun little fat. It's like, no, but there's a real person behind it. And then when she starts talking about the Kennedy curse, let's not forget, Carol's husband was a Kennedy and died. And so it's really, it's not, I understand Carol being like, fuck this. bitch okay um so i think that like if a normal person had brought it up and asked in a way that was more like how do you feel about this how is this affecting you like they actually weren't just like mining it for like cheap gossip or like isn't this crazy then i'm sure carol would be happy to

talk about it but like jessel was going about it in like literally the most superficial idiotic way which is what i thought was hilarious but i fully fully get white Carol was absolutely livid. Yeah, I get it. I guess I'm just kind of insensitive because, like, if somebody told me, oh, my best friend was George Washington, I'd be like, oh, my God, were his wooden teeth disgusting? Okay, whose teeth are better? George Washington's or Shep from Southern Charm.

They'd be like, oh, my God, that was my friend. How dare you? I don't know, but you're friends with George Washington. So I have to ask. Yeah. So maybe I'm just an insensitive, Craig. But I think that there's like a way to approach it where you say hey like you know Seeing that now everyone is fascinated by your dear friend and everyone wants to like emulate her like is this in a weird way

Sort of a lovely tribute to her legacy that people are remembering her all these years later and that she continues to have a profound effect on society Like that could be like actually yeah it's real not really nice but but not like what do you think about Calvin beset? It's so chic I love to look I let the streamline look. It's just wonderful. I love it. But you know what? It's going to be out before you know it. Isn't that sad? And then everyone will forget about Carolyn Beset. So amazing that you've got a friend that's, you know, going to be fashionable for a minute and then going to be out of fashion again.

And unfortunately, she's dead, so she can't change her fashion. So she's just going to be left in the unfashionable past. All right, could you pass the jam? Hey! Is that nice? Is this nice? So everyone's uncomfortable. Haley's still like crying and spittling down her chin. And everyone else is moving on. But Haley will not move on.

And she's like, after Aaron emotionally annihilated me, like I just don't feel like talking. So like thumbs up to Daisy for great food, but thumbs down to Aaron for erring. I mean, Haley is in the corner. Like she's actually like sniffling the whole rest of the Seder. She looks like she herself. was assaulted with all 10 plagues and had the red sea collapse on her i mean she's just she's looks like she's gone through it so everyone's like bodyman of the kennedy curse she is she is the burning bush at this point so um wait is that sacrilegious so then haley

the burning bridge oh is that one the bush oh the burning god it was god that's why i said is it Yeah, that's one God told. Didn't God tell, was it Moses? He told somebody to sacrifice their own son. He's like, should I do it? The Bush told me to do it. No, that's, that's, that's, that's a whole different timeline. That's like the prequel to Joseph and the Amazing Time to Call her Dreamcoat.

Oh. No, the thing was that like people had to kill. It's a whole thing. The point is that Haley looks like she's being the story to pass over herself. Moses i'm looking it up god spoke to moses from the burning bush in exodus to call him to lead the israelites out of slavery in egypt oh yeah there you're right what burning bush i literally the thing with passover is you go through the story every single year so you never forget it so let me tell you something when it comes to burning bush knowledge i'm on top of it

sacrifice a son okay that's abraham i'm telling you what burning bush what burning bush said to sacrifice his son. God tells Abraham to offer his son Isaac. Abraham, I told you, it was Abraham. But then an angel stops him right before he did it. Yeah, the story of sacrificing a son involves a regular thicket or a bush where a ram was caught, not a burning bush. God, bushes have so much work in the Bible. One's burning, one's catching a ram. Very busy. Watch out for the bushes. So now they're talking about the house that they're having the satyr in and someone makes a joke that there's no popcorn ceilings and Carol's like,

Jessel, did you, you called it this a popcorn ceiling? And Daisy's like, no, you were making fun of my apartment. She's like, no, I mean, I thought, I thought we, I wasn't that we were making fun of your apartment. I just thought like, I thought we were laughing together. Like, look at how shitty your apartment is. And we both would laugh with a shared acknowledgement that you live in a dump. No, but I feel like it was very judgy. Well, I honestly thought we were laughing together.

Remember? And Erica's like, yeah, I did too. I mean, we were laughing together. It's popcorn ceilings. Come on. Jeez. God, was there a Walmart upstairs? We should just all go try and get discount, you know, Celsius. I mean, what the hell is pretty tacky. I mean, it was funny. Yeah, like, I don't think we were laughing at you. We were laughing with you in your apartment facing you. We were laughing facing you. Laughing.

You are being serious and we were laughing in your direction, but not at you, just surrounding you with the sound of laughter so that at some point you would feel shame and adjust your ceilings. So Aaron's like, no. You walked into her house and you said popcorn. Oh, shut up, Aaron. You weren't even there. All right?

You weren't even there. Stop inserting yourself. Oh, this is nice. This is nice. So Daisy's like, Thank you. I just feel like everything was judgy. It was very, very judgy. I'm like, you work for Martha Stewart.

She's judging you every five seconds on this show, okay? You're used to it. So I's like, Martha Stewart has 100% said something about those popcorn ceilings. 100% probably 20 times. Like, oh, I just still got the popcorn ceilings, huh? Yeah, we're going to fix that.

It's kind of ridiculous. Come on. Let's get it together. You know who's sitting underneath a popcorn ceiling right now? This guy in my hotel room. big popcorn ceiling situation here. Also, I feel like, I mean, I know popcorn ceilings aren't popular and like, okay,

we don't want popcorn ceilings, but people also go way too nuts about them. Like, quite frankly, we're not really looking at them that much. I think we can all survive. Oh, really? You didn't walk into your hotel room and go, oh, popcorn ceilings. I did not. I don't believe you.

No, it's true. I never, I don't really have a popcorn ceiling issue, to be honest. Like, I prefer not to have them, but I don't ever I don't, I don't just lit up with popcorn ceilings. I don't. You know why? Because we once covered, I think when the first dwell helloes we ever did

was this episode where there was this couple that went to Destin, Florida and this woman walks in and goes, Fred, look what I see, popcorn ceilings. And I don't know. I think I just decided I did not want to be that woman ever because she was awful. You didn't want to be that lady from the home show. Yeah, there's

well, there was also that lady who was like, oh, I want a wall without orange peel. And I had never even heard that term of the texture on the walls, like the orange peel texture. And every home they went into, she was like, here we are. Another home with home peel texture. I said I don't want home peel texture. The lady, every house is going to have a texture on the wall.

That's it. That's just how houses are. It's like, no, you failed here. So anyway, they started talking about this popcorn ceiling and everything. And now, you know, Jess was like, Erin, stop inserting. And Daisy's feeling very judged.

So, Si's like, do you feel like you're being judged because we all live differently? Like our apartments look differently? Is that what it is? And she's like, no, I mean, I just like it's annoying. Like I don't care. But you do care. You do care. And there's something that that about it that's bothering you.

I think that you're bothered by the judgment about your popcorn ceiling. What is it about the popcorn ceiling that's bothering you so much? It seems like Si was coming, it seemed like Si was going to be standing up for Daisy. Like, are you judging the popcorn ceiling? None and not. But it wasn't. It was Sy coming for Daisy, which I thought was funny. She's like, oh, yeah, you got a problem with got popcorn ceilings? People mentioning your popcorn ceilings? Wow, that's weird, Daisy. And everyone's kind of confused. And Erica's like, oh, my God, should we just fix the popcorn ceiling? I mean, should we go and fucking scrape it and fix it? Like, what do you guys

want from us? Yeah, it's a good point that she brought up. And so then, I think Cy at this point was like a little drunk and she was just trying to say way into her own shit. So. So Erica's like, I mean, I'll do it myself. I mean, I am in better shape than everyone here. And Daisy's like, I mean, Jessel's like, does everyone have popcorn ceilings in the building? It was just you.

Are you just like the eyesore of the entire building? It's like, no, nobody else has popcorn ceilings. So then why do you have popcorn ceiling? Listen, we're just trying to help. It's neither Jessel or Erica. Erica won me over in this too, because Erica was right with Jessel, and they weren't going to backed out. It's like, what? It's popcorn ceilings.

You want me to get rid of them for you? Because they're disgusting. Okay? We could do this. We could fix it for you. Like, why aren't you just paying someone $100 to scrape that shit off? And Daisy's like, you know what? Because we've lived there for 25 years.

Eugene's been there. I mean, we paid like $300 in rent. And then they're like, what? And so it turns out it's a rent-stabilized apartment. And then everyone's like, oh, my God. Well, rent stabilized is different than rent controlled. Rent stabilized still goes up. So is it rent stabilized or rent controlled?

And I don't think it was $300 because that's crazy. And only it was $300. And their rent does not go up. I actually found this out that Daisy's rent does not go up at all because she has popcorn ceilings. So therefore, no one wants. They're just leaving them to keep the rent low. It's always detracting from the value. Congratulations.

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