Watch What Crappens - #385 Top Chef & Married2Med: Mash Up Marriage

Episode Date: February 7, 2017

Timestamps below! Top Chef played with mashup brunch and it did not end well. Speaking of things that won’t end well, Lisa Nicole puts her marriage on display again in this week’s Married to Medicine and loses pretty hard after pitting up an event against Heavenly’s. It was delightful. Enjoy! Subscribe at http://www.patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens for bonus episodes, ringtones, and live group video chat parties. Also, check out Ronnie’s new TrashTalkTV RHOBH Audiobook podcast at tttv.podbean.com Timestamps: 00 Top Chef 48:30 Married to Medicine See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. To talk to other crapman's listeners about the shows as they air,

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So that's why I sound crazy. But it was such a fun episode. We just left it there. So there you are. Um, we'll have it fixed by God knows when. Hello and welcome to the watch what crap in spot cars. The podcast about all that crap we love to talk about on Ye old bros. I'm Ronnie from the Roseprix Podcast and the real house on Beverly Hills Audiobook

Podcast on IT and I'm here with the gorgeous Ben Mandelgurve, the B B side blog and the pantablander podcast hello Ben hello Ronnie oh yes it's kind oh my god we had Super Bowl day together yesterday yeah it's already like day two of the week time death yeah yesterday was basically like an unrequited podcast for us we we watched the Super Bowl together Ronnie came over which was so lovely of you. And this is thematically appropriate today, at today's episode, because we're talking about Top Chef and Maritim Medicine, because Atlanta was not on last night.

And the reason why it's thematically appropriate is because Ronnie brought over his famous biscuits that we've been talking about for about two weeks now on this show. Yeah, I got to bring my biscuits for some taste. And they were so fucking good. I had to curse because they were so good. I think it's also because Stasi started following us up

to start talking like Stasi now. No, those biscuits were so, so good. I even had, I had one, there's the first thing I ate this morning. I woke up this morning, I'm like, all right, well, I ate all of that shit for the Super Bowl. So this morning, I'm gonna start eating my healthy eating again And the first thing I did was I had a biscuit. Yeah, yes, that's a story would say. Yeah That was nothing like her. Sorry Mikey's Mikey got in there

And been made Some pressure cooker wings, which were delicious. And then some vegan rice crispy thing, which I should have hated because I mean vegan, yeah, not even this just because it's vegan, but I really hate vegan versions of good stuff. Like rice, crispy streets, like it makes me mad, you know, it's like just eat a vegetable.

But you didn't have me mad. It made me extremely happy. It was delicious. Well, here's my policy on vegan food. Okay. Or I should not say my policy. It's more just the way I like to think of vegan food. I think I like my vegan food to be organic, not like organically sourced like it's organic food.

Meaning that the recipe should be an organic recipe, as in this is what the recipe is, and it just happens to be vegan. And not, I don't want to have, I don't like the vegan versions of meatloaf. That's stupid. And I especially hate it, side note, because there's a restaurant here in LA called Real Foods Daily. And it's a vegan restaurant, and it's like a vegan rubin and a vegan meatloaf and a vegan burger.

And it's like, you're making fake versions of all these foods. So don't call yourself real food daily. I hate that. Yeah, I really don't like that restaurant that's by the crunch. What's that called that vegetarian restaurant? Oh, veggie grill. Oh, I hate it because that's the same thing. They're like, it's a wing salad, but it's tofu wings.

You can fuck off with your tofu wings. But they're, but they're um, Santa Fe chicken, you know, chicken with a napotrophy between the K on the end. They are saying that they're Santa Fe chicken sandwich is actually really good. Yeah. If you have to put napotrophy in your chicken, I really play, I don't want to eat that. But that being said, um, that right, the vegan rice crispy treats were in the Licia Silverstone recipe. Oh, you know, that's another trigger. That's something else I should have been extremely angry about.

I know I should have been angry about that too, but it's actually a delicious recipe. My friend Andrea gave me the recipe initially, and it's honestly great. And every time I've cooked, made them, they've been hit. They're so easy to make. I also had a rice crispy treat this morning for breakfast on my healthy breakfast So yeah, I made exam which is but also Michelle Collins was over there last night. Yes, making everybody laugh their asses off. I mean she's so funny And she got on this dominoes kick where she or she's like we're having dominos That's it like it's delicious. It's try it's total trash, but you know, she talks, but she got it

And I was like by I just couldn't wait because I've been, you know, drinking all day. I was just fun. I had to like come sit down at my house in my underwear. But I got here and I ordered dominos. I blame her. I blame her. I feel disgusting today. You should be in our dominos. We have so there's so much dominos left over, but it doesn't work the same with other people. Like I can't sit at your apartment and eat dominoes like I ate dominance. I mean, yeah, I took a large dominoes and basically made like I roll it felt like I just rolled it up and slid it down my throat. I'm pretty much

I feel disgusting. Like there's a whole pizza being reformed in my stomach right now. It's like not even going down. And then I went straight to bed. It's like a night. Oh my god. Well, my fridge is a disaster right now because I've got some leftover wings. My first ever pressure cooker wings, those two not really, really well. I was really happy with those. They really did. They were really good. And then I made that Kentucky beer cheese, which I think we talked about last week. That was delicious. I'm so glad you liked it. And also I have to say that's a perfect friendship because the biscuits really sing with that shit on them.

I mean, I didn't even get on the biscuits. I didn't even try the biscuits with the Kentucky beer cheese. I mean, I'll do that later today. You have to do it. Heat up a biscuit, though, because they're better like slightly warm and then put that beer cheese. I mean, they were just singing in perfect harmony. Yeah, it was super fun. Thank you for coming over. And you know, the best part about our top chef recap days is that we get to talk about food because Ryan and I

really both enjoy cooking food. So that's what I love about these Monday episodes. We always go on a food tangent, but you know, and let us know, by the way, on our Facebook page, what food you guys cooked and had for the Super Bowl. Cause I always am in the mood for, I always like hearing new recipes and, and fun stuff like that, you know? Yeah, I had the materials to make some,

um, boneless, like, popper wings, just basically, little tiny fried chicken with some sauce, but, yeah, Domino's one. So, I got some, I have the, since I sincerity blew it for the day. I guess I'll have those later. Domino's will frequently win. By the way, I did dip your biscuits into that fake garlic sauce that Domino's comes with. Oh, amazing. Oh, the garlic sauce. Yeah, I didn't know they came with, I didn't know Domino's came with that shit. I thought that was Papa

Johns that had all that stuff. Well, well, apparently Domino's does because our pizza came with that garlic shit, and I dipped your biscuit into it, and it was amazing. Oh, no, hey, so a biscuit. I just want to mention to everyone, by the way, that while Ronnie and I are talking, our podcast is being broadcast live on Instagram at this very moment because we started up an official Instagram for Watch for Crappens and it is uncreatively called Watch for Crappens Instagram.com slash Watch for Crappens. So those people who have already started following us, we already have over 500 followers on Instagram, which is really nice considering it's only about 36 hours old. And those people who are already following are watching at this moment and some of them are even

sending little hearts, which is really lovely. And really some hearts. So anyway, everyone go check out that Instagram and Ronnie Wanch, why don't we start talking about some top chef? Yeah, let's get some top chef on Yeah, big episode of top chef today big huge big episode and not because there was some giant pelicans flying around I did like that people kept get Matt getting mad at the birds and it really shows you how fucking aggressive and evil birds are Birds evil. They're they're awful. I mean, there's a hitch movie, of course, which by the way, someone sent me a Ramona singer. Don't I tell you this already? A Ramona singer snapchat where she's oh, yeah, I told you yeah, or she's like, oh my god so many birds This is like look at all the parts. There's so many. It's like a Hitchkikey and something like a good Let's face it. These birds are out of control. They don't even walk normally. They're walking the sky. Okay. Sorry. Sorry. It's not right. Get down from there. Look skywalk it.

Oh, it's crazy. Well, this reminds me when I was a little girl, I went to the forest. I said, look at all the birds and judging persons, they said, hey, don't look at the birds. They're going to pick your rides out into this day. I'm afraid of birds. Okay. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. But pigeons are day class. Say, all right. I'm sorry. Well, you should be afraid of birds because they will kill you. I mean, if you have any food, all those birds were gathering. And I just was hoping so bad they'd attack Casey.

I was hoping that he'd attack Casey so badly. Also, I was just, I wanted to want to shoot right in her food. Well, actually, will you send me that picture of Casey that you took? Because Ben took a really funny picture of his Teabag and she was on with her snarling and it's really good. So yeah, okay So we open up the only rookie left is Silva and Silva gives us his you know like really low key like no energy monologue about how this has changed his life

Yes, I came to a place where I wanted to be and then it fell apart and then they show the fire. And he's like, and now I've learned to express myself. It's like, Oh, yeah. What were you like before? Before he was just like, they're not even talking. He was just pointing the things. You know, Silva, I was very upset atva because the moment he said in the first five minutes the show as the only rookie left up one twice, now I'm basically unstoppable. I'm like, Silva, why did you say that? You just ruined it for yourself.

Why did you say unstoppable? Yeah, unstoppable. Warning, fire and restaurant burning town. So I was warning like how many warnings do you get? You're gone. All he was missing was a cell phone call to his family. But yeah, well, I think if we had heard that he'd had it, a heroin addiction, then we would have known for sure.

It was just going to be over. I feel like he wouldn't even, he'd be like the worst heroin addict because he wouldn't even, you wouldn't even get that moment. Like, you know, he would like, you know, melt it in the spoon and shoot it up. And then his eyes would roll back in his head and he'd just go, wow. That was so good. He's like, are you high? That's you being high? Oh, well, this meant a lot to him, because you know, he's like this saved my life. I'm like, Oh, now's the heroin addiction now comes. He just it happens with him later than most chefs. So Tom comes into the stew room and Casey is so bit you have Tom this whole episode. It's funny. Yeah, he's like, this is our area. We don't come into your area and bother you

Actually, where we sit like yeah, yeah, actually, yeah, you do come into there You do you go in case you go in from the judges and you actually bother them because they would just be sitting there eating meals if they didn't have to judge you So they have to go to a marina and surely is like oh no this mean boat I can't read board at major sea sickness. Last time I held toilet for hours, but oh no, but. I was actually getting scared because of Shirley's motion sickness because once Padma announced, I'm jumping forward a little bit,

but once she announced it was a sudden death, sudden death quickfire and Shirley had motion sickness, I was like, if my precious Shirley gets taken away from us in a sudden death quickfire because she has motion sickness, I am going to be furious. I'm going to flip a table. Well, it wasn't only motion sickness, it was the medicine.

She's like, oh, I do so many medicine. I don't even know what happened and people are talking and say, wow. I'll take Jamie heroin to come to my nerve. Now I'm not the same. I took so much motion sickness, medicine, I got to do on my neck, I'm my face, I'm not good. I see baby bellicain on the ceiling now. Baby bellicains. Surely would have like the wackiest, what was that movie? Where the baby's prankspotting.

Yeah, she's like the wackiest transpotting ever. Yeah, she would. I feel like the baby sees Shirley on the ceiling, not the other way around. We also know this is going to be a problem because Brooke hates vomit. And so, so if Shirley has motion sickness, it's going to make her throw up and that's going to make Brooke throw up. So already, this is going to be a disaster of a shrimp trip. And Tom, by the way, Tom was on the trip too, right? Wasn't he like, they're like, hey, that's me. They're shipping. Yeah, they're shipping. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Some fish. Yeah. Look

at that. Look at that. Highly fish. What's that one? This is shrimp. It was a shrimp. It was like the most uneventful shrimping trip of all time. It really was. It was just waiting for people to bar. And I like when people like Brooke say things like they're the only ones.

So she's like, I hate vomit. Oh, really, Brooke? Because most people love vomit. That's great. I thought Linda Blair seemed like she was really in her element when she got to throw up everywhere. I thought that she was really loving that. Well actually, yeah, that is a good way to vomit.

The extra-sist way when you're just fully enjoying it. That's actually how I imagined Shirley probably vomit. She just opens her mouth like a nutcracker and just just a straight horizontal spew of vomit. And then just a lot of talking after. Or did you see that? I vomited on preacher. That was so crazy. The devil was inside me. My mother said, why did devil trying to jump off the tree? Shirley, you're crazy. You know, we didn't really talk about it last week when we were discussing the quick fire where they had to taste things, blind taste taste test and we're talking about everyone's reactions

We kind of missed Shirley, but Shirley was absolutely ridiculous during that challenge. She Everything she put her mouth she's like, oh, that's a way of this away as you like take a bucket of water And she's just like splashed on her face and like spit it on Padma next next Is that pickle? Oh, pickle. Oh What is that? Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, but probably could. And Padma is waiting Padma. I'm turning it to Tom like Padma. Padma looks me. Padma is waiting on the dock for a quick fire set up. And they're like, Oh, was this going to be about shrimp? Just like guess what? Today's quick fire is about shrimp. Okay, so yeah, I already figured that out.

Shut up, Casey. So John and Casey, John goes for the Limes and Casey wants the lime and she's like, you can't have all the Limes, John. That's so John to just take all the Limes. It really is. And it's really up now. you really don't need that many lines, especially for a quick fire. Yeah. And he's wanting to take all the lines. Anyway, I was just a dumb little thing, but John's really an ass and he's becoming again, I get he's trying or whatever, but he's just becoming more and more every week.

Like, really, you're going to take all the lines now. Yeah. I'm not into him. I'm not into him. Also, I did not like that silver. My dear silver had to open up a can with his $400 knife. I'm my red note. I said, silver's knife, sad face. I was especially because you didn't even survive the episode. I mean, this guy ruined his $400 knife for nothing. I know that's probably all he got paid for the whole show.

He's like, well, I came out even. And no, I'm on Aireland. I'm so mad about my knife. I'm sure with the hand mixer, what do you call those things? Yeah, a hand blender. A hand blender. Yeah. Oh, how do you work? I'm on so many drugs. Oh, how does work this crazy?

For sure, she was in a catatonic funk and she couldn't figure out anything she just made a bunch of brown stuff. It's not me no my happy thing. And Selden had made in the when they were in Alaska on his season he smoked some some clams and pine needles. Yeah is Is that you learn? This is a professional show. Um, it's a super professional show. Yeah, he's mixed. He's mixed. He smoked some clams.

And so now he wants to do it with shrimp. And I really like that he was immediately called out because Sheldon's doing that a lot this season where he's like, well, I did that before and it worked. So I'm doing it again. Like, dude, come on. Yeah, you're on TV. And the worst part is that he actually won the whole challenge with his two hands. He won it with a Tom. Oh, well, you know,

the most original was shielded like, oh, he also, he also handpicked the shrimp. He made sure to get the road, the shrimp with the row in it, but the pretty shrimp. You got two perfect shrimp. So pregnant shrimp. Yeah, we're, I like our monsters. He's like, I want the pregnant ones. And we're like, oh, for a boy, we're horrible people, you know? People are horrible, humanity. So Casey, you know, she's been having assaults

complex recently because she's been getting a lot of notes that her food is under salted. So we know the way this usually works on the issues. You go she made something. It's like it's going to have pineapple, curry, lime, cilantro. I want it to punch him in the face. That's what they give. I'm like, first of all, you didn't even say salt. I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know have pineapple, curry, lime, cilantro. I want it to punch him in the face. That's what they give him.

I'm like, first of all, you didn't even say salt. Yeah. So then when they tasted it, I'm like, mm, it's just a tattoo salty. And she's like, oh, over salted now. Oh, oh, oh, okay. Like, oh, they're the crazy ones. No, you're the crazy one,

because you're not salty, right? Yeah. And I think what they're really basically trying to say is your food is bland and boring. It's just boring. And last week it was crab salad in between two pieces of white bread cut into a circle. Boring. Yeah, okay. They're trying to be nice by saying two little salts. Yeah, and before that it was a spoiled scallop. So, you know, just don't give them attitude. They're

professionals. Yeah, I think he was giving it all over the place. And one point on the boat she told Tom, okay, I'll forgive you now. Like, you think he gives a fuck? He's probably like this said girl is back here again, you know. It's like waiting tables that girl who always leaves because she got a job. Like she booked something, but then she's back. And she's like, bye guys. And every time she leaves, there's a good buy party for her. And then it's like, we'll see, we guys. And every time she leaves, there's a good by-party for her. And then it's like, we'll see.

We'll see you in two months when you're done shooting your one scene in that movie with Brad. She always does a good by-party. Yeah. She pretty much signed on for a top chef just the way she have good by-party is at her restaurant. Yeah. Oh, it's another good by-party for Casey.

Like, well, it's a chance for someone to get me a cake. No one ever remembers my birthday, because you know they don't't with Casey you know. She's like sitting there waiting for someone to do something special. You're like you see Casey's birthday on Facebook and you're like oh god it takes so long to just click this and write HB. People are so really happy because she shut down her wall they're like oh good that means I don't have to write happy birthday on her wall because I'm not going to message her. You know that feeling, right? You know that feeling when it's like a list of today's birthdays. And three of them are like, you can write on their wall.

And there's one person who's like send them a message. I'm like, nope, I'm not sending a message. I hate that because I actually am the sucker who will send the message. I'm like, why can't I write? I didn't even understand what was happening. I was like, am I blocked? Like so many personal, so many reasons

to take it personally start passing through my head. So I also created when someone, I hate when someone has their wall closed, and you know their walls closed, because you tried to write it up before, and then they're birthed their rolls around, and suddenly they've opened up their walls, so they can receive their birthday greetings, like, no, no, no. Yeah, yeah, yeah. As whole. Yeah, if you want my birthday greetings, you're going to get my opinion on politics the rest of the year or nothing at all, you motherfucker. So even though we were saying how Casey was giving the judges attitude and she needs to stop it, the judges themselves were also giving some attitude.

For instance, when John as well tried to overcommitate and he's like, well, I know that Pat and Alexan is spicy. So I made it spicy and Pat knows, hey, whatever his, his post of BJ was. And she's like, did you mean for it to be that spicy? And he's like, yep, she's like, wow. That's my favorite adma turn of phrase. Did you mean it? Did you mean it? And then, then it's usually followed up by a Tom taking two extra bites going hmm walking away. Yeah Thanks. Thanks John. Wow. Well, that was that was a bite

So the top was sheldon really original Wow, and then the least favorites were KC under salted. Oh, I tried to punch you in the face favorites were Casey under salted. I tried to punch you in the face. Surely it was brown and silver fire. So they were in the bottom and Casey was. Yeah I was at full panic mode because having Shirley and silver my two beloveds at the bottom of this sudden death quickfire. I was like if Casey at last one of these two people, I will be furious. Absolutely furious. You can just tell with Casey's personality that she's not going to win top chef. And I don't, I've never been people with terrible personalities who have won. I don't think

she has a terrible personality. But she has one of those personalities where there's such a sadness about Casey. And there's such like an insecurity there and she really wants to be she wants to be like Frazier's brother Niles you know the show Frazier like she loves I think of herself as being very fancy and she knows everything but then she knows like she's poor and she doesn't really fit that and like there's some weird insecurity about Casey that she doesn't ever let herself man man she basically, she wants to be as good as Frazier, but in the end of the day, she's the one who gets the power attached to her head. Yeah, pretty much. And she also

slams a lot of doors when she goes off to ski happens. Okay, see God bless your heart. You can't even a freezer in a freezer fan-fick segment. She secretly pines for her father's caretaker. She's like, I use that pine in one of the whole show. She's like, damn it. And she really, really resents her father's chair. God, I would love a freezer-stab chair in my house.

There should be a top chef challenge based off of the Frazier theme song where you have to make salad and scrambled eggs. So salad and scrambled eggs. I'll say it again. I'm surprised you especially. I mean, especially Beverly Hills wasn't like not only was Frazier an actor, he was a song writer. Where is Ross, by the way?

Where is she? Ross is on something, I think. Really? Perry Gilpin's on something? I saw her recently on something, not, I don't know, but I was like, oh my god, it's Ross. It might have been a whole footh's, actually. Do you know what?

I am still bothered by, I once watched an old episode of Cheers and Ross came on playing a reporter from like the Boston Globe, but she had a different character name. And I was like, this is, there is a rift in the cheers universe because this is Razz. This is not some lady from the Boston Globe played by the same actress. Yeah, Razz was a Method. She was one of those ladies.

He's like, I'm just gonna be exactly myself because otherwise I'll have to act. Well, I hope that's like, Frazer. Uh. I hope that there's some good backstory about like linking the two characters that brought that Perry Gilton played in the cheers universe, like maybe the reporter on Earth something in Boston and had to go like witness protection program and had to go to Seattle and then became Ross. Oh, God. I'm looking at, I was only halfway there in that because I was looking at IMDB.

Okay. And Ross has some, Ross has some sadness in her life, but she is paying her rent. So we'll get to that. What happened to Ross? Well, TV movie, TV movie, TV movie, TV TV, TV, TV, it's like she's basically a hallmarked channel horn, but she was also in Scorpion, the TV series, a few times. Oh, well, she's basically a hallmarked channel horn, but she was also in Scorpion, the

TV series a few times. That's good. That's good, right? That's good. She was in Hashtag Scorpion. She had a five episode arc. A five episode arc in Scorpion, okay, Ross. And something called Mr. Robinson from 2015.

She was principal Taylor for six episodes. Is that with Craig Robinson? I think it was. She was in the Masters of Sex for an episode, which is horrifying, like let's admit it. I don't want I don't need to watch it. I don't know if I want to see Ross on Masters of Sex. Yeah, do it. If you see a size, you know, Ross is hanging on and she still looks great. Okay, we're talking about Ross. Everyone on Instagram is like, what the fuck is going on? Why are we talking about Ross?

Cause they don't know the context. They just all of a sudden hear me say like, surely, surely, surely had another thing about Ross. What? Oh, wait, Emily, Emily Jarenz says I just saw her on a commercial for a horrible homework channel movie. Yeah, that's what I was saying. The homework channel, she's a homework channel. Oh, yeah, I, that's what I was saying. The home mark channel, she's a home mark channel hoe. Yeah, I think that's where I saw her too.

I think I saw it at my mom's house. Cause my mom watches murder movies during the year, but it Christmas, it's all a home mark channel. She's totally gonna be in a holiday movie about Santa Claus, like falling in love with Santa Claus. Cause you know, I did watch a home mark movie where Crystal Bernard falls in love with Santa Claus and Santa Claus is played by Steve Gutenberg.

This is a true story. Oh, God, Crystal Bernard always has the worst taste in man. But that's like the two worst. Like Santa Claus and Steve Gutenberg, it's like the greatest hits I'll roll into one for Crystal. And Steve Gutenberg would do this thing where every time he laughed, he'd go, oh, oh, oh, because he was like Santa Claus and pedestrian form. Was he didn't have, he wasn't, he was like not, you look like Steve Gutenberg,

but he was secretly Santa. And so when he would laugh, he'd go, oh, oh, oh, I was like, well, if someone ever laughed like that, I would just run. Like you, you, you, you can play normal, but you can't change your laugh, Steve. I mean, that's so Steve Gutenberg, though. That's why God would never make Steve Gutenberg, Santa. Like he's just not subtle, you know, it's Gutenberg. Yeah, he walked through the front doors, I've go down the chimney, like, ah, Gutenberg, why

did you do that? Well, everyone's starting their, their fires now. It's almost like they don't want me in their house. Yeah, they don't because you're Steve Gutenberg. It's like, all right, it's Christmas Eve. Everybody started a huge fire in their fireplace. Steve Gutenberg will come in and eat your damn cookies. And Paul love the crystal Bernard.

Really, that's the one you choose. Crystal Bernard probably still has feathered hair. Like we all know it's true. We always probably see you prefer it. And she's probably still saying that Peter hair like we all know it's true. We always probably super feathered and she's probably still saying that Peter satara do it somewhere. Gonna take forever tonight. Oh my god. Speaking of Crystal Bernard, sitting back. Speaking of Crystal Bernard wings on the Pelican. So, yeah, so surely in case you make squid and Silva makes a redfish of some sort. And by the way, Silva's looked absolutely amazing.

What did he make now? He made some sort of redfish. And it was too soft. Oh, he made something with beets, right? Silva loves his beets. He just wants to make everything look bloody, you know? It's like, I did the beef with with beats and now I do fish with beats like Beats is just such a weird thing to attach yourself to personality wise, you know, I know Dr. Dresch had learned something

Maybe he's just saving up. He just really wants beats I got sick of the in ear ear buds but it's a really make my head hurt. So ultimately, Casey's dish was declared the worst. And she lols. She was sent home, but not before crossing her arms and giving the nastyest look at the judges. Like, really, this is how I get sent home. the hot one gets at home on a sudden fire quick, sudden death quick fire. Yeah, she even said really, so she's so mad.

Okay, so let's see here, Chef Chef Chef, I write Chef a lot, I don't know why. I think if I'm confused on top Chef, I just write Chef. Like I'm gonna remember that tomorrow. So the guest judge for this week's episode was the inventor of the crew and out himself, Mr. Dominique and Saul, who showed up. And basically, odd little man.

What is he, he's like a French Peewee Herman mixed with. Like Mr. Mr. Wencespace, the British guy. Mr. I's his face? The British guy. Mr. I want to say Mr. Butz, but that's not his name at all. Uh, who are you taught? What's he from? You know the guy, um, he was the priest in four ways in a funeral, but then he has the, he has like a slapstick thing.

A British being Mr. being. Yeah. Oh, yeah. He's like a Mr. being and Pee we hermen. Yeah.

Like if Mr. being went to culinary school and got civilized Yeah, with the dance The bichiness of like Isaac Misra, he kind of like he's got kind of all those going on He was an odd little dude and I love him because the Krona is actually one of the most amazing inventions of all time I still go to get one I have a place it serves you get a street Wait, which one do you go to where do do you get your cronop from? Tasty donut. Oh, well, you know, I have not had their cronop, but you know, that's like my favorite donut shop, one of my favorite donut shops. It's very, very good. They've gone through a lot of shit historically. They've had to move from another location. You know, they're still holding on.

And this time, everyone was like, I can't believe they're going to move. They're going to go broke after moving from this historic location. But guess what these motherfuckers did? They opened up a cross from the weed store and they didn't even know it. The weed store came later. I mean, how lucky is that to be a cross from a weed store as a donut? How fun is that? I mean, they were gonna talk perfectly. Talk about fate. Congratulations, Tasty Donuts. They do a buttermilk glazed donut. That's like in the shape of a fist and it's delicious. They also do a very strong apple fritter.

Yeah, I don't eat any of those things. I like chocolate croissants. Maybe I like to do a controlled donut. What do those call a Claire not an a Claire. I love an a Claire too, but what are the cream filled lost on the Cream. Oh the long ones. Oh yeah girl. Yes. I love the like a Boston cream. Yeah. And now the cronet. And I still go in there for the cronet. Just what a wonderful invention. I want to try their

cronets. I only had one cronet ever. And it was good, but I didn't think it was like amazing. This is all down good. Of course I've only had it wasted. So I don't know. I will try it. Honestly, I will try that cronot. There's a donut place on Burbank and Vineland that does a shockingly excellent glazed donut. Oh, yeah. Love a donut. So anyway, Tasty donuts, check them out. So the cronot, this guy so talented, I mean, he's kind of creeps me out but I totally fuck them just because of the cronet, this guy so talented, I mean, he's kind of creeps me out, but I totally fuck him just because of the cronet. He probably gets so much cronet ass. You know, he's probably been sweeping the city with cronet ass. He's like, yeah, oh, you don't like that. I don't have muscles. I invented cronet. And it's like, penis is, penis is flying in his face. But he only makes a limited number every day. And I think that's obnoxious. I think you should make as many as possible.

No, girl, you gotta keep them lined up. He learned from Steve Jobs. So, Sassy? The Kronath King. So nothing more southern than a good branch. I'm like, well, that's nice. It's better than teen pregnancy. These, because I could've gone there.

Yeah, so basically, oh, so this is actually a crack me up. So we learned the challenges that they're going to make a brunch, but it's not just any brunch, it's got to be like a mashup brunch in the spirit of the Krona. You know, there's going to mash up like a lunch, a breakfast and a lunch thing to make something unique. And then Tom Chimes and he was like, yeah, like for instance, I used to make a poigrafl. It's poigrafl and a waffle. And I just cracked up. That was fucking disgusting. It's not that it's gross. It just like, it's just the stupidest

name. Poigrafl. He was so proud of it. I'm just a waffle to cause we plan that for weeks crazy. I feel sorry for the goose who lost its liver for that shit. In a waffle, really. You couldn't even do a torsion. You couldn't guarantee an apple for me. I mean, Jesus. I like to make the goose into Luan. Would you believe it?

They put me in a waffle. They didn't even cook me into the waffle. They just cut out the center of the waffle and just put me syrup was poured on me. Can you believe it girls? I mean, I'm right here in front of Tommy Tune and I'm in the shape of the waffle. I mean, how embarrassing. Did you believe it? I mean, here I thought you saw a little bit of cherry jelly, but no. But no, well, the only way to make lemonade from this is to sing for my new album, Dagestino, Battostino.

Say that again. The way I went. The way I'm texting Tom. Tom, are you playing me in a waffle? Question mark. He's telling me this isn't about Tom. It's about Tom. He's putting in a waffle.

Oh, my God. Well, we're, we're kindred spirits and you know, he thinks I'll taste good in a waffle. I probably went. So I dressed Tom. How can you do that? Why don't you do that to yourself? You're just going to let yourself be putting a waffle. Yes, yes, I am best of me. But it's like I read, I didn't want to tell you this. I didn't want to have to be the one to have to take this. But this is what Tom's future is for you. And she holds up a picture of an ego waffle. Oh, you know about this for three days didn't you? Lee, the win.

I didn't want to tell you. You sold this to entire supermarkets. Well, it's a Lego. It's a Lego. Okay, so these mashups, wow. So this, we already know pretty much the beginning of this challenge. It's not going to go well. Nothing they were coming up with even sounded remotely okay. Like it just all sounded terrible. Brooke was the first with her idea and she's like,

yeah, you know, this is really hard because the grown-up wasn't just invented in 10 minutes. Like that was a long road, you know? And I don't know how I'm going to come up with something. And I already did my, my perfect thing last week's challenge. I guarantee the Corona was come up, it was invented in 10 minutes. I guarantee he had croissant dough and he put in, he said, you know, I'm going to put this in a ring and throw it into the deep fryer. Oh, hey, yeah, look what I did. Look what I did. And then Dick started flying in his face and a business was born. So she decided to make a yogurt parfait twist. There's no way you're going to twist a yogurt parfait to being something good. It's yogurt with granola.

Brooke. I mean, there's no chance of that being good. Well, if it's on McDonald's menu, don't make it. of that being good, right? Well, if it's on McDonald's menu, don't make it. The thing is this, Tom actually had, Tom had the best insight, and it was all the way at the end. He was like, liquid nitrogen could have been your friend, and he was actually, he's actually right, because Brooke had this crazy idea that she was going to make yogurt cups as in a cup made of yogurt and put stuff in it.

The only thing is Brooke, have you seen yogurt? Do you know what yogurt is made of yogurt and put stuff in it. The only thing is, brook, have you seen yogurt? Do you know what yogurt is made of? Have you seen a free standing yogurt structure? No. How you gonna make that into a cup? What are you thinking? There's no Lego shaping and top chef just deserts. Like there's no yogurt challenge, you know. You can't even make it into a yogurt volcano, okay? It's just gonna ooze everywhere. What are you thinking, Brooke? You're a smartness.

What is wrong with you? I'm not sure, but I don't like seeing Brooke get complacent. I mean, I figured you can at least, I don't know, take a bagel. Not a load to something. Come on, you're Brooke. A yogurt parfait.

She was mentally exhausted though, because the previous challenge, she made a exhausted though because she, the previous challenge, she made a dish that Tom said was the best breakfast and brunch dish he's ever had in his life. So I mean, she was sort of at a disadvantage that she really can't top that. But she should have just made it again. Why can Sheldon do it? Yeah, exactly. Now, Sheldon I thought was going to go home at first because he told a story about his family and then they cut to him, like unpacking a bag of pre-made waffles. I was like, oh, that's the go-ho combination to him.

Oh, yeah, they know how to trick us now. Yeah, but it turns out he really didn't eat. Sheldon's big idea was he was going to turn the chicken into the waffle and the waffle into the chicken. And by that, I mean, he just ground up the waffles and put it on top. So because I think they were ground up, I didn't really make that much of an impact. And they didn't really, the chicken that looks like a waffle, his looked at least good. Wasn't it just fried chicken made with a waffle crust?

Yeah, I mean, his, I mean, his looked delicious, but his, he basically cooked the chicken in the waffle iron or something like that or he fried it and then he like finished it in the waffle iron. So like that or he fried it and then he finished it in the waffle iron. So it didn't really look like a waffle to me. I thought he was gonna grind up the chicken and make some sort of chicken batter and then put that in the waffle iron. I was just glad he didn't smoke something in pine needles.

I was proud of him because, you know, or like make a stew and then smoke that in the prime needles. Like just combine everything he does over and over again. By the way, I think I'm just going to interject and say I'm going to end the Instagram live thing because they were down to just three viewers. So, yeah, it's kind of weird. Yeah, I'm an end it's everyone on Instagram. Thanks for joining.

Listen to the rest of it on the show. Bye. Sorry. Now we're back. Bye. Bye. Bye. So let's see. So yeah, his didn't sound so good. And then what were the other ones? Silver was going to make. What was he trying to make? Silver had.

Silver was. Silver was also. It was misguided. He was, so his fusion was that he was going to make a frittata, and then under the frittata, surprise was going to be some Arctic char, which to me is like, that's not like a mashup or a combo. That's, that's just like a, oh, there's fish under this. Yeah, it's putting a frittata on top of a fish.

And it also, it probably would have ruined the fish because I bet that frittata would cook the fish a little bit. Well, what would you have made? What would you have made? For breakfast combination. I mean, it's hard. You know, I might have looked into it. I probably would have French toasted something. I probably would have like, I would have done something

with a French toast twists, like, you know, I don't know. I actually don't know. I really don't know. I mean, I like a waffle. I was thinking maybe like a waffle burrito, like, yeah, or a waffle taco. Make really thin, uh, waffles that you could roll around like a chicken burrito.

Or so, I mean, that's not very creative either, but it's more creative than putting a frittata on top of the piece of salmon. What about like a waffle club sandwich? Like three waffles? Okay, we just won. Thank you. Or how about like a, how about a waffle burger?

Or how about, how about a chicken and waffles where the waffles is a sandwich and the chickens? Or how about a waffle? I'm trying to think of other uses of like, buns and stuff. Like, um, how about an onion soup with a waffle crouton? Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, someday's parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful take on parenting.

Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brown-Oller, we will be your resident not-so-expert-expert. Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding, and thinking. Oh yeah, I have absolutely been there. We'll talk about what went right and wrong. What would we do differently? And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone.

So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad free on the Amazon music or Wondery app That's that's getting more into silver territory You probably get a done something with pancakes also by the way I think the waffle burger or something had to work anyway. We went I'm smoking out the door Sorry, I was rolling around slamming door his people are like is he claiming his house?

You're like we won. Yeah, we won. That's it. Thanks. So there's top chef. We'll take $150,000 from Sam Pelagrino, whoever the hell it is. I'm sure there's something that could have been done with oatmeal and probably a million things could have been done with eggs. I'm sure doughnuts, I would have actually done maybe, I may have played with the doughnut in a way. Well, didn't the John say that he was going to do a octopus? John was bullshit. This was bullshit, okay. His fusion is he made a Korean, a Korean octopus hash.

That's not later they were saying hash browns are supposed to be crispy. I'm like, it wasn't a hash brown. the first hash. That's not later. They were saying hash browns are supposed to be crispy. I'm like, it wasn't a hash brown. No, they didn't say hash and they just said the hash was supposed to be crispy. Oh, someone said a hash brown later on. I think it was the guest.

But maybe they were like, he invented the cronets. So he made a mistake. Cookies. But yeah, I don't know. That was a disaster basically for everybody. Silva, especially because his ovens weren't turned on. What happened? It's like he had some oven issues or something and had to turn them into scrambled eggs. Yeah, he had to, yeah, basically. He, that none of his frittatas were cooking fast. It wasn't just, it wasn't cooking. And so he had to scramble them on the stove top. And you know, that was, I think it was just, the problem was was poor conception. It was just a bad idea for a dish.

And then on top of that, technical malfunctions. And on top of that, a bad job at saving it, you know, he couldn't get all his dishes out all at once. And he looked so sad and so adorable. Yeah, he looks like he was coming. And I kind of did too, because I mean, they bring Gale back for every egg challenge. I mean, I don't think so.

Yeah, I mean, Gale, I've never seen somebody get more furious about eggs. Like it gale in here. It's a big challenge. Mm hmm. Well, it was a hat ladies, by the way, which was hilarious. The guys were all hat ladies. Well, I love. I love. Well, I love the judgment.

Well, my favorite part was when John brought out his shitty fusion dish, which was not fusion at all, it was just a scramble basically with octopus in it. He basically was kissing up and like after he presented his food, he as he's walked away, he's like, oh, by the way, I love your hats. And Padma was like, thanks. I need a borderline homeless person telling me about hats. Yeah, it was a disaster. They all pretty much set.

Brooks was basically just nasty. I mean, it looked horrible. And she put peanut butter, like peanut, it was the disaster. She's sitting there. And another feature about this brunch is that it had to be decadent and so Brooke was saying how she's like, she's like, yeah, I think that the yogurt is very decadent in mind.

And Dominic, I think it was Dominic. And so it was like, it's a parfait. Parfays are not decadent. They're inherently delicate. It's like diet food. Like people eat yogurt parfaits on weight watchers. Okay. No. Yeah. And then she'll then honestly, she'll then look the most delicious, but I took issue with the fact that when he presented his, he's like, well, I think that mine's very unique. I'm like, it's fried chicken. It's fried chicken.

It's chicken waffles, which as it crumbles on top. And don't forget what Catherine told us a few weeks ago, Catherine spires who is the food editor for LA weekly. She said that chicken and waffles is like the fastest growing, fast casual concept out there. So it's hardly unique. Yeah, Sheldon, even though it looked delicious,

and then certainly made dumplings, she made hamburger, she made cheeseburger dumplings, basically, she made dumplings with cheeseburgers inside. Which one? Yeah, I was so happy for it, because I like Shirley, but it was like a cheeseburger dumpling one. It was very, very fun to start. That was very fun to start. The only difference is that like they would have wrapped it in wonder bread and called it a dumpling. Yeah, that's a very sad week. Food networks are would be like, all right, your challenge this week is to put cheeseburger into other things. Oh, that's crazy. Cheeseburger. Well, I've never had cheeseburger that's not a cheeseburger. I mean, what are these people smoking? Some of that crazy weed. So I took a pizza slice and I wrapped around a cheeseburger and I called up pizza burger and they're both frozen and

she probably would have won. But she's been like, that's great. That's going on the front of a website for the next five months. So basically they were all a disaster. I don't know how they picked which was the worst disaster. Brooke thought she was going home and had Madma had was railing against that parfait. Padma was furious during judging. Yeah. Padma was so mad. She was like really fighting against that. Okay. She was. I love it. I agree, Padma. Yeah. I thought Brooke was going to go to be honest. I did too. But I ended up being silver, because I guess at least she tried and silver was like,

eh, eggs, eggs and sound. I'm actually going to Brooks restaurant on Sunday. I hate to cheat on our plan, but I have a friend in a from out of town who wants to eat dinner by L.A.X. And so we're gonna go to the triple. Oh, there you go. Yeah, very excited. So let's see, Tom sticks up for Brooke because Silva had shitty eggs, which I

can't believe Gail didn't go off about. I can't tell by chance people people didn't believe in the fog raffle, but here we are. But she did make a point to agree with Padma, which is kind of rare for Gail, you know. Yeah. But she's like, well, I have to agree with Padma because eggs, I mean those eggs. I feel like Gail would, it's not so much that it's rare. It's more that Gail probably agrees with Padma, and Padma's like, oh, no, I've changed my opinion.

Gail. We don't agree. But you just said, yeah, but now that you're into it, it's sort of like not as cool. I don't even know what happened with Silva when he got kicked off. Did he even say anything? He was like, thank you. You know that you and singer he's like, no, but the end monologue thing where they're like, well, I'm mad, but I will keep going on with my life. And you know, keep trying to be the best chef that I can. Did he even have a little video ending? Because I didn't write anything down. I just wrote Burn It Down, which is so rude. But

I was probably too devastated to retain any information at that point. I was probably, I couldn't hear anything through my tears. Oh, poor Silva. Silva.. Well that brings us to the end of Toepshiff. Yes. And now let's make a move on over to Atlanta for Mary to medicine. Yes, because real house was of Atlanta was not on this week because of the Super Bowl. So you know, we're going to go to Mary to medicine instead. Eggs, you know, we're gonna go to Married to Medicine instead. Eggs, you know. Oh, I guess. Oh, I guess you're involved, by the way. What a rough night for Atlanta.

Rough night for Atlanta. Yes, basically, Lisa Marie was the Falcons. Lisa Nicole. Yeah. Lisa Nicole was the Falcons of this episode. Everyone's like, well, she's got, she's got a going for. Everybody's gonna be at hers. And, you got, she's got a going for everybody's going to be at hers. And you know, she's had this trademark for two years and it was like one table. Yeah.

Teach me how to play football with you. So let's see here. This was the big conference off where Lisa Marie, or Lisa Nicole has conference off where Lisa Marie, Lisa Nicole has screwed everybody of the trademarks, the name learn to take a husband who cheats on you back over and over again, possibly even with men. Thank you. I've paid my kids like that is the longest name for a conference ever. Teach me how to have a pregnancy that your husband doesn't want, but how feeble.

Keep us together in the wake of him having in fatalities with other people. Perhaps men. TM. That's a big poster. So we open with my favorite thing of this show, the Jackie cam. I love the Jackie cam. And I love that they're doing it so much. Where Jackie's just driving to work it for in the morning.

And she's like, today at work, I have a, a baby that's going to come out with five centimeters of cute, cute, malosifice around its face. And then at nine a.m. I have another baby coming out. What a day. Like, well, thanks for, thanks for Camon. Yeah. Yeah. And now I shall show you my breasts.

So Quaid is getting opening a birthday gift and it's one Tiffany wine glass. And she's like, hmm, a glass from Tiffany. Well, what a lovely gift. Was it? What a transpired was that I got one glass. And I don't don't know the other one is yeah, let me pretend to be an investigator Mr. Tofie's clerk, where was the last time you saw the other glass that goes with this glass? Man, I'm not sure. Okay, and good question. She tells

I'm glad she opened that herself because she would have blamed her brother for breaking the other glass, you know Yeah, there should have been two who drinks one one glass. It's like the saddest gift to give someone. It's like, you know, Quaggan end up alone anyway, just send her one glass. I'm not buying two. Drinking one with one glass is like, send an elephant, the, the, you're like, okay, man, yeah, I don't need to try on top. I'm already laughing. Um, the, the basic thing was the conference off. I mean, I guess we don't have to go through every moment of this show, but it's pretty obvious in this episode. And listen to a Nicole does lie a lot. She's just like over. She is shady and she's obviously lying. And what

Heavenly is accusing her of because Heavenly so crazy that if Heavenly accused anybody anything, I don't think they would ever be convicted because she sounds crazy. You know, she gets so mad. It's like she's just lying. She's she's exaggerating. But Lisa Nicole really did try. She's like, let's have a name meeting for our conference, which we will do as partners. And then she steered it to get her name, which she already had trademarked. I mean, she's, she's bad. She is shady. Oddly enough, I don't feel like Heavenly is that shady. I believe it or not. I think that, I mean, she's shady in terms of what she says about people. But in terms of business, I don't get that sense.

But at least in Nicole, I do feel like it's a charlatan because she tries to always talk like she is an entrepreneur when she's got this janky ass fashion line. She does these seminars, which I don't even know at the basis for them and I don't know why she's qualified to give them. I think it's just a way for her to basically get some money from some gullible souls. I mean, remember, this is a woman who's in direct sales, okay? She is the woman who would, you know, call up about like vacuum cleaners or whatever, okay? So I just don't trust this bitch. And she's been caught in a million lies. You know, she, shady is, the shady does. You know, she has a shady husband and she looks the other way, which is inherently shady on its own. So she's a disaster. And

everyone knows it, which is why I think everyone decided to go to heavenly's conference and not to Lisa's. And it wasn't only the girls, the audience. I mean, she had one table at hers. And she was saying, well, I don't everybody knows you don't buy billboards and you don't do advertising because you rely on the word of mouth from the community. I'm like the word of mouth is that your husband is cheating with a man. Yeah. And that you keep taking him back. So girl, you need a billboard. I mean, sometimes you got to say billboards are okay again, because if you're relying on your reputation, you will be getting nowhere. And that radio thing she didn't show up for, heavenly ended up using that to go on and say, well, I'm doing,

here's the event. And it's at this place. And she totally screwed herself over. Yeah, exactly. Heavenly went on there. She was able to promote her stuff. And she apparently, Heavenly was using social media. And by the way, PS, Dr. Heavenly's been liking some stuff on our new Instagram account, which is kind of cool. But she went out and she's, she promoted herself. And for Lisa, Lisa, they'll go on to the manure to go out there and say, well, billboards, excuse me. I've got a De La Voice today all of a sudden. But she's like, a De La and the day of Porsche. She's like, no one needs De La Voice anymore. I mean, you know, she's saying she's got a rely on the word of mouth. How do you think that word of mouth starts? Doesn't just come out of thin air. Yeah, stupid. So she ended up screwing herself up or

went to this one. And uh, uh, uh, Lisa Nicole had one table. It was the saddest conference. So let's talk about Lisa Nicole's conference. Yeah, let's throw that. First of all, no one's there. Yeah. Second of all, she has nothing to say. She's just saying, well, going to my conference, learning to be loved by someone made possibly doesn't love you, but who cares? You committed and you have a mortgage together. TM. So she's standing there with Darren looking awkward as all get out. And she opens with she's like, sometimes marriages have problems.

For example, we have had problems in the last year. Like, oh, God, you're going to open with this. Not good. Opening with the husband cheating and you doing nothing about it. Then she separates the men from the women and the man Daring goes off with the man and he's like, now I would like to discuss how the women do your women like actually even care what you think because in my relationship, I just found out I was having a baby and I was like, okay. And basically the men just bitched about the women. Yeah, like there's a pastor who's like, now my wife, she used to be much more, you know, supplicant.

And now she has a million. She's like, my wife used to be submissive. Now she's like, are you wives? Yeah. Darin's like, is she a man? And what? Yeah, I was like, I think since when is Dar Darren qualified to be leading any sort of discussion about anything? Okay, the guy has the worst lives in the world. I mean, he is truly the worst liar we've ever seen on Bravo. And he's both a lead a discussion. He's supposed to be a figurehead of something of anything. It was so good when Lisa Nicole's like, it is very important to be able to trust your

man and then they cut to Darren and the interview being like, I've been married to Lisa Nicole for nine years and I have been faithful five, five, nine years, nine years. Amazing. I mean, it's so crazy. I mean, by's so crazy. By the way, the one good thing to me with Lisa Nicole's event was that she had Carly Stevens talking and Carly Stevens is formerly of the long gone and forgotten, but never forgotten show, Big Richard Lanto, which was such a hilarious show.

I think it was on the style network. It was the only thing I watch on style. Really anything from the only thing I've watched from the E network universe. That show, Big Richard Lanter, so good. So when I saw Carlos Stevens, I got all warm and tingly. Well, the men basically bitched about the women. And we're like, yeah, women are bitches, right? Okay, so that was the men's conference.

Then over at least in the coals, she's just basically complaining to the ladies. And she's got them all sat at one table, which is, I mean, kind of sad, but also hilarious. So they're all around this table. And she's like, you know, let's talk about relationships in general, because I find it horrible when you are friends with women, and they betray you and they act jealous. I'm like, okay. So now you're going to talk about the women that hate you in your relationship conference. Yeah. You are terrible at this.

Terrible. Yeah. Absolutely awful. And I mean, there was just no one there. Mariah showed up. So I mean, when Mariah is the only one in your corner, you know, you got a problem. Yes. And Mariah takes the mic and she's like,

I would just like to say that Lisa Marie, when, when, or Lisa Nicole, when women treat you like this, like her pop-eye eyes twitching, she's like, no one wanted to go to heaven least. They just, like whatever, why are you guys talking about your personal issues? This conference, these ladies paid money to be here and they have to listen to you bitching about your girlfriends. It was pathetic. It was exactly. And the way I was

like, well, what she doesn't understand is that this is act one for these ladies and act two is when they kick you all out the group. And I'm like, well, you deserved it. And they do too. You don't get to just be fucking mean to everybody all the time. And they have to stand there and take it. And you're're still mean and when they kick your ass out the group again I'm gonna laugh yeah you're an asshole. Oh that being said Mariah continues to be hilarious like when she was talking about how she thought happened. He was nicer when she was fatter. She's like every pound she loses. She gets messier and messier. She's like the netty professor. I'm

skinny. I mean I'm like don't bring any school. I'm not a fan of the school. I'm not a fan of the school. I'm not a fan of the school. I'm not a fan of the school. I'm not a fan of the school. I'm not a fan of the school. I'm not a fan of the school. I'm not a fan of the school.

I'm not a fan of the school. I'm not a fan of the school. I'm not a fan of the school. I'm not a fan of the school. I'm not a fan of the school. I'm not a fan of the school. I'm not a fan of the school. She wasn't compared to Norby. That's when she was nice, when she was Norby. I want my heavenly back, like Norby. So meanwhile over at a heavenly conference, it was packed, pretty much the whole cast was there. I mean, because that's the implicit thing, is that the cast is gonna be there

and people are gonna get to come and hop and hop with like pseudo celebrities. So everyone's there, it's fun, everyone's having a good time, they're up on the couch, it's like a 1990s talk show. And everyone's having a great time. My favorite part was one woman got on a mic from the audience asking about what do you do when you're into a guy, but you've got a small penis. And I love Simone, was like that is a superficial penis. And I love Simone was, was like, that is a superficial thing. She's going to have a long road,

long hard road ahead, and a very loose vagina, obviously, in her soon. That with me was amazing. And one of the husbands, or her husband, asked heavenly, he's like, well, you seem very happy in your bedroom. Why don't you tell us what you do? And she's like, I'll say it all the time to my girlfriend.

Get on your knees and pray really hard. Heaven help me. They asked Jackie. Jackie was being hilarious in this. She was like the medical doctor, whatever. Dr. Jackie, what's your thing about sex? And she says, it is very important that a woman knows her body parts,

and she knows her anatomy. Because once she does, she realizes a woman can convulse certain parts of her anatomy to help the man stimulate her properly. And she's like, Jackie, a freak, Jackie, a damn freak. And then someone asked Jackie about A and O and she's like, now, he can be dangerous because you are a muscle and you'll find that you're walking around with a tiny bit of stool in your pants. They're like want.

He's like, I don't want to hear about us still in your pile. So hers was fun. And Lisa Marie is just lame. Basically, it holds, like, God, dare. I'm sorry. It's just going to be, she's Elvis's daughter in my head. It makes us so more interesting. just gonna be, she's Elvis's daughter in my head. It makes us so more interesting. Oh my goodness. So Jackie then went on and used some of heavenly's advice, which is that she had to make it,

she had to take some time out for Curtis and make it look nice. So Jackie went and got some catering and set up some candles and had a romantic little dinner for Curtis and read up poem about, you know, Curtis, I love you and it's an honor to be your wife and to be the main breadwinner in this house by delivering babies and being a doctor and spending a much time doing that to support you. It's an honor. Nothing says this better than the Jackie cam. Now let's watch

2 a.m. She loves that KLS song 3 a.m. internal and she likes the Mashbox 20 song 3 a.m. and I'm learning. So the other the other plot was toria, the, as Lori Ann calls her, Toria, Toria income destroyer. Toria and Eugene having to go to the, the tax guy because they owe so much money to the IRS that they had to go on a budget. And Toria's on that that they have to go justify their budget. I mean, this bitch just got an $8,000 a month home, which is insanity.

And she has to go justify this now to the tax guy. And she's like, lead to a dinner budget. And I thought it was pretty weird, let's go. So he's like, uh, yeah, it's not. Yeah. Well, that's what they were taking off of the one, because Eugene now like to get five cases one every week just for the fun of it, because we like cases,

because we got into mysteries and stuff but I guess it's too much money. It's all for friends. There she goes. Man, I mean, I mean, Eugene, when we go out, we balla. No, we buy bottles, we lobster. I'm like, oh, Toria, God. And Eugene is like, what?

No, we gotta have these. You do that with your friends. Uh, okay. Yeah, I guess you're right. Because I guess I could give up my Porsche. I mean, these two are both driving courses. Come on. And she's like, well, that's very nice of you. You see he said he'll go by his Porsche. She's like, and you will too.

So, uh, uh, well, I have came here with my Porsche. So I can't give it up. At one point, because look, it's logistical. You don't see the drug cause I'm driving around in a non push. No one who talks that poorly should ever be in a portion. It's just not fair. How about you learn English first? So they, they ultimately, do you just call it a toilet? No, I'm surprised no one has called a toilet, toilet.

But so they actually wind up having a housewarming, which I thought was really sweet because they did a barbecue and they're like, we're gonna pay our down and we're not gonna get catering and everything. We're just gonna cook our own food and have a real cookout. I'm like, oh wow, congratulations on doing what everyone else in the country does. But it was nice because they cooked their own food and they had little chapers. And Eugene got really possessive over his chicken because he had clearly spent all this time making this chicken.

And then Toya just went and slathered some random sauce on it. He's like, you saw my chicken. He's got so much. You got to do that. He's got a lot of the sauce thing. I know it didn't, well, I should, what I should have did was not sauce it, but I guess I sauceed it.

So, it's like you don't think that too, man's chicken. She goes, ah, doctored your chicken if you was. And he's like, well, you don't do that. She's like, well, then I'd better stick. And he's like, well, I'll get another nurse from work. She won't do that. She's like, just giving then I'd burst it. And he's like, well, I'll get another nurse from work. She won't do that. She's like, just giving him a look from out. That is not logistical, Gene. So the big thing with this house swarming was it was going to be the

first time that heavenly and at least in a cold would come face to face since their convention off. And it was great. It was a really great thing because Heavenly is so in the right on this one. And you can see this, what I like about it is this was not a made for TV moment. This was Heavenly truly exasperated with this woman, feeling betrayed and annoyed and angry because Lisa Nicole was trying to pull a fast one.

And she basically starts confronting her because I guess she's she I guess she had called Lisa Nicole the devil at one point and Lisa Nicole did not really appreciate that which cracked me up because it's so stupid that she's saying No Lisa Nicole called some under devil But she go heavenly the devil

Yes and so heavenly like Here's the devil my devil Maraz is like I never heard anybody say that's all I'm saying I never heard anybody say devil. That's all I'm saying. I never heard the word devil. She said, well, it's on my own. So, was it you? And she goes, no, I've done nothing to be called a devil.

She goes, well, me to have a high. So we'll just have to ask the horse. And look, here's the horse right here. Maybe we can just ask him out. And then, the joy is like grabbing her and pulling her away. She's like, we ain't even shooting yet. The cast ain't even here yet, girl. Come on, let's dance.

Yeah, that was like the first time anyone's ever been dragged away from a confrontation on the Bravo. No, they just let him go. Yeah, Troy was like, well, I breathe. It's a lot of logistical. So the she takes her upstairs. And then I don't know how you can be friends with Troy and ever expect advice because she never makes any sense.

Heavenly's like, I'm trying to challenge. Well, I can have a conversation with somebody, can't buy. And Toya's like, yeah, you have a conversation. The problem is we need to make sure you have a conversation. Okay, thanks for the advice, Toya. So Heavenly winds up grilling Lisa Nicole and she really gets her like she's really grilling her and Lisa Nicole. None of her story is adding up. First, she's saying, well, you know, I trademarked it two years ago, but no, I was working on this event and it wasn't that and like how come you didn't tell me, well, and Lisa Nicole says, I didn't tell you because I don't have to tell you. And she said,

I don't have to tell my speakers, my plans. And she goes, a speaker, I was like a partner. She goes, no, you weren't. You were just a speaker like everyone else. And she's like, then why you make me pay half? Like, yeah.

I was feeling, I was like, I mean, and everyone was like, even Mariah was like, ooh, least in the goals on trial and the glove is turned to fit, honey. Yeah, but she's like, Miranda makes as much sense as usual because she's like, oh, honey, leasing the cold is on trial and she is quiet and the quad

girl fits like what? Oh, what are you even talking about? You're mixing the metaphor as it didn't make sense in the first place. No, because she is looking guilty. That's the gloveest fitting. Oh, no, I got, she's trying to do an okay thing. I got that. How is that mixing with quad?

Because she's trying to drag her argument with quad using her into the lease and the colon heavenly thing and saying that heavenly is like quad because like quad Heavenly didn't care about Lisa Nicole. She just wanted to use her for all of her contacts. Well, look around were those the contacts that she was trying to use? No one was there. Like, it doesn't even make any sense. All right. More right. She needs to get out. Either way, Lisa Nicole was definitely busted because the fact that she was then referring to Heavenly as a speaker at the event is so insulting.

And if she's the speaker, why is she doing all the legwork with the promotion? Why is she paying for half of it? Really so, so shady. And then Lisa Nicole is like, well, if I come up with an idea, you're damn right, I'm going to trademark it. And it's in Heavens. I'm like, well, why didn't you tell me about it then? If I remember, I mean, it's just the way that Lisa Nicole tried to couch her shadingness into some sort of professional stance was really.

Yeah. I tried to make it sound like heavenly was just another speaker like everyone else. And she failed. I mean, she basically just proved herself to be the biggest ass liar. I mean, the fact that she can be sitting with Mariah and you like Mariah more, I mean, that is huge on this show. Yeah, because Mariah is the worst and she will stab anybody in the back. That is absolutely true. And Lisa Nicole is actually now the worst on the show by far. I know. Yeah, by far. Nicole down. No one by far. Yeah, she's, well, she's been, she's been flirting with being the worst for a while perhaps even midway through last season

But now it's definite like she has definitely solidified her Anti-lead whatever the the opposite of a lead is she's definitely I didn't even find her the worst because she was going up against quad who plays so dirty I mean quad had that queen on the red carpet and she's like, oh, I'm so surprised. You know, claiming to a fuck there. And I mean, Quad was doing such mean things that even if Lisa Nicole was being a bitch,

she just got cheated on. She's probably currently getting cheated on, you know, with other dudes. And I felt for her, but now I don't feel for her at all. Like, she's terrible. And I hope she watched that episode last night with her husband just basically bitching about her again and saying that he never even wanted that kid

in the first place or whatever. I mean, wow. So yeah, I'm still still just big. But he met with me. He really loves me and was a baby. Yeah, she's, she's just, she's terrible. She's actually one of the reasons why marriage medicine, I don't think, is not as good as it used to be.

Well, I can't imagine that she'll stay on much longer because no one will shoot with her. And she's not good TV. That's the thing. Like, Mariah is also pretty despicable, but she's usually good TV. At least Nicole has never been good. Like, the first first her first season

I didn't even understand why she was there and then her second season she just sort of went crazy And then this is I think this is her third season, right? Yeah, this was this was season four. Yeah, she's just really worthless And Simone was great. I mean Simone's always great, but I love how Simone just breaks it down because Lisa Nicole tried to guilt them and she's like, it was beautiful, but the one thing that when it made it better was support for my girlfriend. And Simone goes, now I've told everyone this and I will say it again in front of you and everybody, so there's no confusion. Sounds like she's going to be all nice. Yeah. And she's like, we have never been close. Our friendship is more superficial. We only see each other at events.

And Lisa Nicole goes, well, we went to lunch once. And she's like two years ago. Yeah, I think she's basically we're in the same cast. We're not friends. We're just on the same show together. Yeah. And Lisa Nicole seems to have that relationship with everybody because the only one she's friends with is Mariah. And they're not real friends. They only shoot together to bitch about everybody else, you know, yeah.

So she's going to get what she deserves. I think next season because no one's going to shoot with her now. Yeah, I would like it if they got it at least in the cold because she just she adds a real element of bullshit to this whole show and I think they just need to get rid of her. Yeah, me too. I agree. And on that note, we are out for this lovely show. And I think they just need to get rid of her. Yeah, me too. I agree. And on that note, we are out for this lovely Monday. We are outy. Yep. We will be back tomorrow with a little Veda pump rules. Yeah. Hi, everybody. We'll talk to you soon. Bye. Hey, prime members, you can listen to watch our crap and add free on Amazon music. Download the Amazon music app today. Or you can listen to add free withins ad-free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today.

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