Watch What Crappens - #72: One Last Twirl For 'Atlanta'; Also, 'Medicine' Fallout and Random Babbling

Episode Date: April 25, 2013

On this bonus episode of Watch What Crappens, Ben Mandelker (bsideblog.com), Ronnie Karam (TVgasm.com), and Matt Whitfield (Yahoo!) share their bleary-eyed, drunken thoughts on the third installment of "The Real Housewives of Atlanta" reunion. Then the three tackle "Married To Medicine" before finally losing all sense of sanity, resulting in a lengthy discussion of "The Facts of Life" and other sundry topics. We can't vouch for the quality, but we can state that late night recording sessions do result in strange podcasts... See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

From Wondery and Audible comes Class of 88, a new podcast hosted by Will Smith. Before 1988, a lot of people didn't take hip-hop seriously. But hip-hop today touches everything from film to fashion to sports. So what changed? Follow Class of 88 wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, you know what, Matt? Getting a good shape can be a real pain in the ass. Tell me about it, Ronnie.

Searching through 50 different brands and models, ugh, and then trying to match new blades to old handles? Forget about it. Yeah, I'm paying for BS features where your razor doubles as, like, a flashlight or a toothpick. Who wants to pay 20 bucks for some new razors? want to pay 20 bucks, join our society of smarter men. Go to dollarshaveclub.com forward slash Bravo to get high quality razors delivered to your door for just a couple bucks a month. They've made it really simple, Ronnie. High quality razors, 100% guaranteed, sent on schedule, so you never have to think about it again. Every month you get a new pack and every week you change your blade. It is that simple. So go to dollarshaveclub.com to get your shave on and to save some money while you're doing it. Yeah, and next time you think you're looking for

a dirty, rusty razor, remember, there's a better way, and it could be right at your door. Go to dollarshaveclub.com forward slash bravo. Get those razors to your door. Ding dong. Who's there? Is it Barry's or is it Razor's? Either way, I'm going to feel like a king today. It's dollarshaveclub.com forward slash bravo. Get your shave on. Hi everyone, welcome to Watch What Crap Is, a weekly podcast about all that fun crap on Bravo that we love. I'm Ben Mandelker from bsideblog.com. You can find me on Twitter and Instagram at bsideblog. And joining me, as always,

are Matt Whitfield from Yahoo. Hi, Matt. Hey, Ben. You sound extra gay tonight. I did it for you. I did it for you. Thank you. Thank you.

Love it. Hey, girl. Hey. No, you're at lifeonthemlist on Twitter and also on Instagram. And also joining us, as always, is Ronnie Karam from tvgasm.com. Hi, Ronnie.

Hello. Hello. Hi. Ronnie can be found at tvgasm on Twitter. And I always forget, what's your Instagram handle again? My Instagram is Ronnie Karam. Okay.

Have you been posting any selfies, Ronnie? I've been waiting on some selfies on your Instagram. No, I put a selfie on our Facebook today. Not a fan of the selfies because in my head, you should see how cute I am on my head. Like, I have such good self-confidence. In my head, I'm adorable. Selfies, it's kind of like it takes a hammer to my image. I don't like that.

They can be rough. They can be rough. I like being adorable. I thought you looked adorable ronnie you looked adorable oh man ed ross your selfie on ross so i like to call it a rossi um oh my god gretchen rossi so oh my god gretchen rossi so anyway um you can uh come to our facebook, facebook.com forward slash watch what crap happens. It's highly entertaining. A lot of people post a lot of things, a lot of links and gossip and photos. Funny photos are always going up.

It's really, really worth it to go to our Facebook page. This is actually sort of like a quote-unquote part two almost of our previous podcast where we started. Previously, we talked about Real Housewives of Orange County and some Bravo gossip. If you're looking for that from the latest episode, go to the last podcast. Today, we're going to talk about Married to Medicine and the Real Housewives of Atlanta reunion. Oh, my God, you guys. What a week of Bravo as usual. Also, it's late at night and we've been drinking.

Yeah. Which makes it extra good. Extra good. We've already been pretty nutty so far. Or extra sloppy. And you know what? If you feel that it was fun, leave us a comment on our iTunes page in the comments section. We have a full solid five out of five stars.

Yeah. And if you think it's terrible, don't leave a comment at all and don't ruin our credit score. We're not even on iTunes. Yes, Slade, you dumbass. You can't even figure out how to vote. Yeah. So, you know,

I'm a little worried that my margarita buzz may be wearing off. Do you need to go make a quickie second? Do you have some Coke, sweetie? No, but I think what I might do is maybe, should I grab a beer? Should I grab beer from the fridge? Should I grab one too? Should we all grab something? Everyone

at home, go grab something. I'm going to grab an This is like Andy on Watch What Happens. We have to have like a secret word. Alright, Ronnie, keep talking while we go get drinks. I have nothing to say. There is nothing for me to say. I already have a drink. I'm not going to talk.

I'm just going to be quiet. Okay, I'm walking away, so you have to keep talking. No. That's some bullshit. Okay, I know what I can do. I can read you stuff that you've posted on Facebook. Madge posted a picture of Heather from Dr. I'm talking.

How dare you? From Dr. I'm talking. How dare you? Posted a picture of Heather from her husband's website of her all airbrushed and rabbit-toothed. That's pretty funny. So thank you, Madge. Michael posted some, is the Real Housewives of New Jersey bra staged? Yes. Except for the people bleeding out of their eyes part, which apparently happened.

So that probably wasn't staged. Yeah. Kelly posted, the dead eyes on Kroy's painting will haunt my dreams tonight. Oh, yeah. That was from the – Kim unveiled a painting of Kroy on Don't Be Tired for the Party tonight. And he's dead-eyed? Were his eyes just dollar signs? Well, it happens to folks from montana to be fair his eyes were dead

he did have dead eyes but then he also had dead eyes in the painting too so yeah that's true i was gonna say he does kind of have dead eyes in real life i think it looks like he's falling asleep well i think that's how you that's the only way you can be if you marry kim zolciak is to just sort of let your soul go away. Kim's got a dead voice. Her voice is dead. It never moves. She does have a dead voice. I'm cracking open a beer.

Me too. What flavor are you drinking? I'm drinking Beck's. Bud Light over here. Oh my god, you're in the can. I'm a fancy bottle girl. Here I go. Listen.

Not a flavor. Listen, I was a frat boy, and I know you were too. In fact, we're in the same frat. We were in the same frat. Hello. I just said that. So In fact, we're in the same frat. We were in the same frat. Hello. I just said that. So I had to get in touch with my frat roots with some Bud Light. You guys, is it true that in frats, guys just blow each other all the time?

I'm going to tell you this. Here's an insider secret. I know some of you fans out here don't like listening to our personal lives, but too bad. Half the people in my frat were closeted homos, and nobody was out, and it was such a shame because it would have been such an amazing party. We also had some gay guys in our frat, but no one was – same thing. But I don't think it would have been – it would not have been an amazing party. It would not have been an amazing party. Most men that are on crew teams like a BJ.

Just saying. Well, I'm sure. That's what I'm saying so did they did they get them because they were in a frat or no i never experienced or witnessed anything would it be weird if i joined a frat like now at my age uh there's a movie about that you could be the headmaster of like yeah that's right at like sigma new on um the u.s campus you could be like the house dad the daddy yeah the house daddy okay the house you're a frat daddy but the house daddy okay i'll take that frat daddy hey it's your daddy lights out oh wait was that your was that your

candy burris impersonation rather run the candy factory big That's my big scary hairy daddy bear accent. Hey boy, the lights need to be out. Now let's play a game. Listen. Our flats were not on the bayou, okay? Are you wearing... We were not on the bayou and we

were not wearing harnesses because clearly there's a harness. It's more like crank up the Dave Matthews bra. You got some Crisco a la chicken. Crash into me. That sounded nothing like it. You destroyed the legacy of Dave Matthews. Let's talk about some

dumbass Bravo shows. So we're on Real Housewives of Atlanta. Okay. These all kind of blend in together. And no, not just because it's hour two and I'm drinking. Because they're all the same. What happened in three hours on this show? Why do we need three hours of it?

Well, the third hour of the Real Housewives of Atlanta reunion featured the men. That was like the big thing to happen. And as we briefly mentioned in the previous episode, obviously this is a week before portia was served with her divorce papers by her gay husband cordell so he did not show up to back up his wife but all the other men's is showed up and started getting a little sassy and you know

what my i personally enjoyed watching apollo because he put on a bow tie and he was like i'm educated and so like everything he said was like no I'm educated. And so, like, everything he said was like, no, now see, indubitably when you were talking to me, I, I, and that, therefore, and thus forth, at that time, before we forewent with those conclusions about what the texting was, you were

not talking to me in thus manner such as. Phaedra is turning him into an amazing lawyer. She really is. And you know what? I would be more than happy to him into an amazing lawyer. She really is. And you know what? I would be more than happy to have Apollo as my lawyer. Oh, you say I'm a criminal? I'm an educated criminal.

That's a big difference. Okay, buddy. Yeah. Good for you, buddy. Yeah, I really – I thoroughly enjoy it. And you know what? The sad thing is even though he was clearly putting on airs, he did still sound more educated than Peter. Okay.

Speaking of Peter, Ronnie, can you just take the next 30 seconds to talk about Peter being high and how red his eyes were? What you talking about? He did that to you. What? Shut up. Okay. You're like Sanford and Son right now basically. And you can't be talking to a woman like that and on national tv and then ganging

up with all the guys and being drunk and high while your wife is showing off her boobs on that he did he's peter did have some good points though which is that when they're talking when kenya was talking about walter he's gay or walter's a groupie and he's like this is a man that you quoted all season long all season long you quoted okay this is a man that you courted all season long. All season long you courted. Okay? This is a man that you brought into the agency. Oh, my God. Like, the first two.

That is fucked up. By the way. What's fucked up? That's the way his voice sounds. That is, I don't care. It's fucked up. That's the way his voice sounds. He sounds like he's talking through a pillow.

I think that Kenya's answer is to everything. You know, people say, oh, she's so crazy. No, she's crazy. When he's like, you can't just call him. You can't come on the TV and call a man gay. And she's like, well, that was actually not a criticism because it's not bad to be gay. So I didn't mean anything bad by it because it's not bad to be gay. It was actually a clever response.

I thought that was actually a clever response i thought that was actually a clever clever response to yeah i mean because peter was right i mean it's like everyone was right like you know you brought this guy out that being said i do actually think kenya's right i think i think walter is gay i do think he has a toupee and uh he's he's he's the worst yeah you could tell he's gay when he was going off with the guys. Like, yeah, I'd hit that. Yeah, they got to be really young for me. Like, yeah, I'd like him to be like 11. Like, shut up.

You could tell he was gay when he went fishing in a pair of $400 Gucci white high tops. Or when he, like, went right over to Cordell and was like, yeah, let's talk about women vagina parts and such. Don't you love putting your penis in a vagina? Isn't that the funny women are so crazy it's kind of like when ryan seacrest bumped into my friend cory and started asking him about where he worked out oh i'm just saying allegedly oh reals i like ryan seacrest i do too but where's julianne huff now we're not criticizing him because it's not critical to say that because it's not critical to say that it's not really a big deal. I like gay people.

Yeah, I like gay people too. You know, like Walter. Cordell. So Walter's a pathetic cocksucker. I mean, I'm not saying he's pathetic because he's a cocksucker. I'm just saying he's a pathetic cocksucker. But listen, we're not

trying to slander him. We're saying that he actually really enjoys taking a piece of chicken and sucking on it. Yeah. He's a cocksucker. Yeah. He likes to suck face with cocks. Roosters!

Roosters from TJ Maxx. From TJ Maxx's that are previously distressed. He into tj maxx and he finds a decorative rooster and he sucks on it and then he gives it to gretchen rossi and she puts it in her kitchen yeah so i'm sorry that you had to make it something dark and dirty but i He sucks cocks. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, so they all attack Kenya, which I love because Kenya is such a liar. And then I love that she's like, well, if you don't like me, Apollo, maybe you should stop texting me then. Maybe you should stop texting me then. That was her fan.

And then she hands her phone over to Andy, who's looking at these texts and he's like there's nothing sexual in these texts you know the text would probably like go away leave me alone like oh you were looking hot on wendy williams and he wrote back thank you that's not a sexual advance it's like it probably was something like apollo is now your instagram friend stop it oh my god why are you always texting me with alerts from facebook yeah he's apollo's following me look twitter told me so right here well of course kenya's like seminal moment of the reunion was at one point she basically couldn't she had no more defenses she had nothing no more bullshit to spew so she

just stood up and twirled and did her stupid thing and then she continued to sing her song like you say i'm this i say i'm fabulous for like the next five minutes she's batshit crazy yeah she at first she wasn't even she was just kind of rocking back and forth muttering it to herself it was really you know it wasn't okay yeah i also like i also like they talked about her, how she wants to have a baby. Like, they were questioning whether or not her relationship was real. And then people trying to be nice were like, you know, she wants a baby, you know. And she gonna get it.

And Kenny's like, thank you. I'm like, no, you're 42 and you're proving yourself to be totally crazy on national TV. There's no baby for you, whether it's real or adopted. Not real real but like social services will never allow it yeah it's not happening ever yeah she's pretty crazy um the other really fun part was i got to on the last podcast but that was porsche going off on that rant what the hell was she talking about it was like a su Sugarbaker rant. You know, it's like. What was she doing?

She was like, she was just going crazy. I thought it was actually, I enjoyed it, to be honest. I mean, it was funny, but it was sort of like a nice, I thought like, I felt like it was an honest moment, you know? I feel like if she could have just remembered what she was talking about, she could have been okay. But she gets, she gets like a a couple minutes in and she's like, and I'm a woman and he told me that I said kitchen.

And he said, I know. I know I'm not perfect. I can't be perfect 265 days a year. I know. I know I'm not highly better than Beth, but I try. I try. That's the best I can do. I can try.

Lord knows I love Harpo. Lord knows I do. Lord knows I love pillows. I got so many throw pillows. I design my own pillows. I love pillows. I never said I was a pillow designer, but I love them. That's the best I can do is

love my pillow like the woman that I am. She was fucking ridiculous. And she needs to stop acting like being a housewife and sitting around and doing nothing while your husband goes out and earns money is like the smartest choice you could ever make. I'm a hero. I don't have a job. And I just sit at home and do what my husband tells me to. Well, I love that when she says, I sit at home. I don't have a job.

I do nothing. But guess what? I want more. Oh, really? No shit, Sherlock. You're just sitting on a couch all day and you want more? Congratulations for having a basic level of aspiration. I'm sorry to bust up this party between the two of you.

But I actually love that she started to defend herself for the first time and I actually started to gain a modicum of respect for her because she was not going to let these bitches walk all over her well no I think she actually handled herself very well over all three reunion episodes you know especially remember when she took down Kenya last week or the week

before about the Miss you know universe pageant that lady that she referenced or whatever she did her homework yeah yeah yeah and i like that she was like and i want to learn from y'all because y'all my elders and i want to know like really you what are you going to learn from these bitches? Name one of these bitches that can teach you a thing. Yeah. Well, Phaedra can teach her how to be an entrepreneur. Candy can teach her how to masturbate.

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Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!, a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a- a And that's – NeNe can teach her to pull out hair. Cynthia can teach her how to run a thriving business. And how to host a pageant. Oh, man. Well, that girl I think will be back. The end of the show, which we can skip back. I'm not trying to end it.

But the end of it was NeNe saying, well saying well you know we still need a new housewife and andy said well are we gonna get rid of one or just bring a new one on she said i think one can go and i'll talk about it with you in your office what the hell and you know that that's true she probably wants phaedra off you know because she hates phaedra right now no candy nose well by the way i loved loved also when I don't remember what brought it on, but it was clearly something with Apollo and Kenya. They're going back and forth

and then it just cuts to Phaedra and goes, and that's why I called you a whore. Poor Phaedra. And he said, so everybody, was it a good season? How about for you, Phaedra? No, not really. Not really. No, not

really. Phaedra looked so massively uncomfortable during the entire reunion. She was like leaning, like she was about to roll right off that couch. She just wanted to get right out of there. Yeah, she had that slanted sour face the whole time. And you know who looked the most

uncomfortable was Todd, Candy's boy. But he's there for her, for his man, or his woman, or whatever. God, I wish I was still a grip. You know what, though? I felt bad for him because he clearly does not want to be on this show. But that being said, he had the best answers for anything the entire reunion you know when he said he said something like i've got to be there for my woman and she's like oh look how smooth he is i was like yeah you right candy she did well yeah they all

did they all did pretty well but that was what was kind of boring about it there was three hours of no one really losing it i mean kenya was crazy and porsche was crazy in her own little way but you know if nini's gonna just sit up there and pretend that she wrote the constitution i don't know what's what this show has left well i actually was massively entertained by all three episodes but it's one of those things where it's highly entertaining and then the show ended and i could barely remember what had just happened maybe it was because it was over simulation or maybe it just was generic craziness i don't know what it was i'm not saying we complain that they fight all that's all they do you know sometimes it gets old and i'm not saying that it necessarily has to be fighting but just something

it's like on a season where not really much happened. Like, hey, you remember that time where – I can't even think of an example. Like, hey, remember that time you had a beauty pageant and you charged like 1,000 people $100 to walk in a high school gym? Remember that? Let's talk about that. I guess you have to have something happen to the last three hours of a reunion. Yikes. Yeah. Yeah.

Why didn't Andy ask Portia about her saying that there are 265 days in the year? Why did Andy not – they had like a little clip montage of her stupid things. He never asks the right questions, whether it's on Watch What Happens or it's on the reunions. He never says the right things or asks the right things. That's true. That's true. Yeah. I'm bored with – let's move on.

Yeah, let's move to Marriage and Medicine because that show is so fun. Yeah, that show was really fun. And I love that they started right where we left off with Ray. I don't believe what happened at my home. When I saw my lamp falling on the floor, I knew I had to invoice someone via PayPal. If you're going to say invoice, you best invoke the best invoicer around. I'm going to tear it down. When I saw there was a fight, i just thought it was funny i love

interesting people but i'm gonna invoice them later how fun is that oh oh yeah so who sent who a paypal i was actually confused yeah wait no i was confused in that point because mariah claimed that carrie sent her a paypal invoice for the broken shit around the pool. But then Carrie said that Mariah went on to PayPal and took $1,200 out of her account. I don't know what was going on, but PayPal certainly was getting used quite a bit. You know what? She just went on PayPal and was like, I want a refund. I didn't know you could do that.

I didn't know that either she went home after causing a fight that broke up the entire party to go home and take your money back on paypal is pretty well the fact that this was all arranged over paypal was hilarious too i don't know why but it just was why are you paying paypal your money and why are they acting like twelve hundred dollars is like enough to buy a mall no one no no wonder why they got a sheet cake because they probably bought it off of groupon i have arranged i have i have personally put together this entire party over groupon and i have never been more horrified than when a sheet cake showed up absolutely not i will not have this at duncan's party those

plastic plates don't clean themselves i cleaned every plastic plate that came off of the groupon i took the plastic off of my furniture for this party and for this to happen is unacceptable so you guys where do you think mariah like mariah do you think she really doesn't get it or she's just playing tough she doesn't get it she actually does not get it and i will tell you why look at her fucked up scary mother from the previous episode when the fight went down if she came from that scary um predator's loins like you can just see where the scariness began yeah that woman really does have like a vile air about her yeah no she's i i feel bad saying this because you know we've only seen a little bit of her and it's as she's been portrayed on reality tv

but i feel like it's safe for me to say that mariah's mother is a terrible person right you are in a safe space right can we say she's a terrible person with a bad weave file yeah she looks she's got nothing but darkness in her she's horrible yeah she's she's a she's she's a rough woman she's a rough woman with rough values. Well, isn't this a lovely evening? Who said it's lovely? What's that? This ain't a nice party.

Why didn't you say my daughter was lovely? It's like, whoa. That being said, Toya's no angel in this either. Yes, she is. No, she's more of an angel than Mariah, which is shocking because I used to hate Toya, but now I like her a little bit more. But the truth is that when the mom was saying, like, why can't you say that my daughter's house is nice? Toya was like, I'm not going to say something that was already said. I'm not going to say it.

It's already been said. Why don't you just, like, say, no, Mariah's house was nice, too. Like, why not? Why can't you say? Why should you have to cave into a scary monster bitch? Why can't you say... Because why should you have to cave into a scary monster bitch? It's called, if you're going to, like, quote-unquote, be part of this doctor's wives community, it's like, learn to be a little genteel. And if someone is being tacky, you rise above it and say, oh, yeah, Mariah's house was lovely, too.

No, you've been doing so many Carrie impersonations that you're starting to take on her bullshit. Doing Carrie impersonations is a private struggle that I've had for 20 years. I don't appreciate you making light of my Carrie impersonation struggles. I had to go to a clinic to learn how to do a Carrie impersonation.

And I'm not even sure if I'm doing it correctly because I'm not even sure that Carrie's accent is real in the first place I wish that you would do Carrie Bradshaw instead I can't help but wonder what that would be like Carrie Bradshaw monologues as Carrie I couldn't

as I was throwing the party I couldn't help but wondering were these bitches fighting over my I don't know will Mr. Big ever come back to me my Manolo Blahnik I don't know. I can't. I have to stop. My Manolo Blahnik. I couldn't help. Were the bitches ruining the party or had the party ruined the bitches?

Perfect. Thank you. I recovered. I recovered. So Latoya... I mean, Toya. Okay. Didn't Toya throw a glass at that bitch's head before they started fighting? No, her hair got twirled.

It was honestly, I've seen this fight a few times now. It's kind of hard to see who cast the first stone in terms of physicality. Because it started off in this weird, as Matcha said, this weird hair twirling place. Like one, I think Mariah twirled the hair, but then Toya twirled the hair back, and then it sort of got to a shoving. It wasn't like it went from zero and then someone punched.

It was an escalation of strange gestures. She came up to Mariah and she started twirling her, she started playing with her hair, like lifting her weave and putting it back down on her chest again, over and over again. It was some aggressive weave. Who's under there? Who's under your weave?

And she was like, why is your mama, we need to talk. Why is your mama coming up to me? Why is your mama saying these things? And then Mariah started flipping her weave back at her. So they were both flipping each other's hair. Yeah. And then. That's what Matt and I always do.

And then Toya threw a drink at mariah and mariah hit her in the face with the purse wait no no but there was there was a before the drink mariah did take a swing before all of that though we have to talk about the fact that you cannot deny that mariah showed up to this party four hours late drunk as a fucking skunk out of the back of that limousine and when she thought that toya was you know toya i think wanted to say like yeah your mom was being showed up to this party four hours late, drunk as a fucking skunk out of the back of that limousine. And when she thought that Toya was, you know, Toya, I think, wanted to say, like, yeah, your mom was being rude to me.

Mariah took it as, you're fighting with my mom, and now I'm going to beat your ass up. Of course. And to get to later in the episode, when the doc, like, Dr. Simone and Dr. Jackie, a.k.a. the two smart women, decided to sort of, like, sit Toya down, they were sort of like of like um you realize that was not the time to do that you know and you didn't have to you know toyah kept on saying well you know if someone swings at me i gotta swing back like that's just what

i'm gonna do i'm sorry that's how i do if we were at a party at the abbey and your mom came up to me ben and was being rude by saying that I didn't compliment your condo down the block and she got up in my grill and then I bumped into you at the Abbey, I would, you know, address it with you and then if you tried to flip my hair, then I would throw a drink on you and then you could hit me with your wallet. Well, I wouldn't have to

flip your hair because you use that wonderful shaving system that you advertise at the top of the podcast. But on top of that, no, the point is this no sense didn't you didn't didn't wasn't there a shaving uh ad didn't we do a shaving ad i don't shave my head well fine i'm not gonna i'm not gonna pursue this line of questioning any further i don't want to learn anymore listen i'm i'm twirling your weave right now no what i'm what i'm what i'm trying to say is somebody please make us a graphic that says i am twirling your weave right now

honestly what i'm trying to say is that uh toya kept on saying this thing like well mariah like pushed me or whatever it was self-defense and i think what dr simone was really trying to get at but toya was a little too dumb to realize, is that it shouldn't have even been in a position, gotten to the point where they were having this one-on-one. Toya should not have even talked about the mom at that time and place. Talk about the next day, whatever. Like, that was not the proper time

for Toya to even broach the subject. Let's have them talk about it over a nice ladies' game of mahjong. Yeah. When the hell are these bitches gonna have like a nice sit down let's go to rosa mexicana i'm like we can talk about that besides when carrie has a sit down at her pool to drink tea because i can't even do her voice but her mother said something about tea my mother always said that when you have to get things out you just drink a lot of tea and i always tell duncan that when you have to get things out, you just drink a lot of tea. And I always tell Duncan that I'm going to get tea. I'm going to tell Duncan that I'm going to get a lot of tea for his fake heart.

And that way he won't have a heart attack again. She's an anorexic. What a diuretic that is. I know. Karen Carpenter had a way with food and I followed her for years. She knows. A way with food. She has the her for years. She knows. A way with food. She has the best dieting tips of all time.

Yeah, so Toya is ghetto, and I think Toya threw a drink first. I blame her. But then you had the mom hitting the head, and then my favorite thing about all of this is that the one who came out trying to look all classy was Miss quad honey oh quad can i can i say something uh controversial i actually think of mariah and toya and quad i think quad actually is the classiest oddly enough quad is classier than mariah i'm not gonna fight you on that yeah i think i think quad is actually memory is so bad i mean it's so bad absolutely not absolutely no absolutely no oh my god quad no i do i mean you shouldn't act like that when you're

at a party oh really quad hello you had to like be uninvited and then re-invited. She's ridiculous. I think it was probably because... I think Carrie only uninvited her because Carrie's ridiculous. Quad was starting up at that previous party for sure, but I don't think she was starting up in necessarily a getaway. She was starting up in a tacky way, and there is a difference. Just because no one got hit

yeah either way that's the only difference at this point that's the only thing separating any i i like i like quad and i like that she has the balls to touch one of those creepy um human uh figures at the museum you know that's like muscle real muscle and bone i was trying to eat dinner while that scene aired it was not good but that being that being said when they were sort of like um sort of recapping the fight and quad's husband was like uh he's like well i think i hear a fight i think i hear a fight and they both start to crack up i started to laugh too i thought that was such a funny moment with the two of them laughing in their little like interview anyone no hello i like that like that pinhead um mike tyson guy because he's he just makes me laugh every time i think how was

that guy a doctor because he's like yeah baby i can't wait till we have a baby baby yeah they all have both that's like the thing she says are all the home are all of the straight with quotes around it african-american men and atlanta homosexuals i'm just asking i would like to know furthermore is this like are they all so uncreative that when they try to make themselves look smart they all put on bow ties like from apollo who's not a doctor but he put up a bow tie for the Atlanta reunion, to Quad's husband, to Mariah's husband. In all the interviews, they had little bow ties on. I was like, it's a little on the nose. Yeah, it's like when a girl wears glasses.

They're like, oh my god, she's so serious. Absolutely not. Absolutely not. Our babies are dogs, honey. We're gonna rock and roll tonight so i my favorite thing actually beyond because the fighting was pretty much over at this point but my favorite thing and i was actually super surprised but i

love the doctors i love both of them especially dr simone dr simone in the beginning simone is the shit by the way playing basketball in those stilettos with oh i die yeah and i loved when she was talking about her little she's this adorable 10 year old son who she's asking about like does he have a girlfriend or whatever and then she tells us she's like you know it's okay if he has a girlfriend she's like but i want to know who the little bitch is i was like oh she's hilarious and she's smart and the only problem is that overbite you know not even a problem not even a problem yeah let her let her why are you guys making me be like so mean tonight like you're supposed to be the mean ones too oh my god we get enough in listen matt all night matt we already made fun of a nine-year-old and a five-year-old so

just give it a rest okay you have you're you're stuck making fun of the doctor that's yours you get the doctor yeah you took on ariana looks when i really just don't like the person and i've i've just talked about their personality already so much. Yeah. I like to talk about people's looks when I feel like being super shallow and acting like a total asshole. Yeah. But I liked her. I mean, I like that she kept saying over and over that medicine comes before her family because that's going to be used in so many fights.

Yeah. And I love it. And I love that she's just so open about it she's like yeah i love my family but you know this comes first so there you have it no i i truly enjoy dr simone i think she is she seems very bright very very funny um very sharp and she and Dr. Jackie have the proper perspective on all these ridiculous fights. I mean, you can really see the difference between people who are educated and people who are not. And it really comes through on this show. And also people who like to act like they're educated, a.k.a. Carrie, but are still not educated at all. Oh, yeah.

Carrie's the girl who learned to read off bathroom stalls. Like, that was her education, like in a truck stop. Stop it. Shut up, Carrie. I never learned how to go to school. So therefore, when I was getting banged in the stall at the truck stop, I took it upon myself to read all the graffiti and all the scrolls on the stall. And I learned many things. I can still remember phone numbers for years.

I never learned, if I wanted to have a good time, that I should go to Zachary's house. But I always remember Zachary. I know more people willing to have a good time than any of you combined. I have seen so many toilet stalls that I almost

became a plumber. My Irish slash British slash Australian heritage. That is non-distinct. I'm just going to keep on talking if you guys don't interrupt me. I was cut off. Matt, were you?

I'm here, but Ben's audio sounds correct. Oh, my God. My audio cut off. That sucks. Don't worry. I literally said nothing funny. I was just yammering away in a Carrie accent. I was like, where is everyone?

I was saying, I know more people who are willing to have a good time than any of you combined. Yeah, I heard that. I laughed and then I started yammering away. And then I sort of started to get lost in my own joke. But then no one was saying anything, so I had to find some way out of it. Oh, my God. We're back. Stupid Technology, S with this podcast once again

listen it's 12 45 we've been drinking these things happen yeah um well there was there were some other really funny things that happened i just can't remember any of it let's see toya she burned mariah's uh little dress thing for her kid. Oh, that was not dramatic at all. Let's see. Mariah didn't really... Mariah was not apologetic whatsoever. I will say this. For as ghetto as Toya is, and she definitely is ghetto,

I thought that her apology to Carrie was very contrite. And I think she said what you should say during an apology, which is, how can I make this better? Wait, what is wrong with you, Ben? The way she went about that apology was I brought up blank check, just tell me how much

to fill in. Well, I thought that was for the damages. I wasn't thinking it was for... I thought that was like... Did I give her too much credit? My friend, I will give you as much money as I have. I have came here today to give you a check.

And I was going to write a check to the drug bazaar, but then I'd rather put the money towards you and our friendship. Why can none of these people get the proper tensing down? I have came here so many times to learn about proper tensing. Carrie just gets what she wants. It's total groveling.

And she's like, you are a wonderful person, and I forgive you. We are moving forward. We are moving forward. I'm telling Duncan. I'm telling Duncan. Duncan. We're moving forward. Duncan, we're moving forward. We are moving forward. I'm telling Duncan. I'm telling Duncan. Duncan. We're moving forward. Duncan, we're moving forward. Toya.

Should we really become the new spokesperson for Dunkin' Donuts? Dunkin' Donuts? I'm going to get a donut for Duncan and call it a Dunkin' Dunkin' Donuts. And it will be Dunkin'. Duncan, why are you dunking your Dunkin' Donuts? Duncan, are you done dunking your Donuts?

I'm turning into the godfather. You turned into Arnold Schwarzenegger or something. When Toya looked at me and her face looked like death, I knew that Duncan and I had found a new friend. I will just talk in Carrie voice for as long as possible. What else happened on this stupid ass i wish i could remember well so so i mean you know dr simone and dr jackie tried to confront toya basically tried to tell her um she shouldn't have let it escalate and then um dr jackie tried to

talk to mariah and and dr jackie is one of the one again one of the few moments of reason in any reality show who's and said you know is it possible that when toya was talking about your daughter in the barber shop that she actually didn't mean any harm she thought it was something that she could talk about is it possible the remote chance and i was like no i don't think so remote chance and i was like no i don't think so yeah those those people are all stupid and then we have to watch them in the discount lingerie store trying on lingerie oh god god but man i sure loved watching them i like that lady who chooses work over her children i think that's a really good move and i like the other doctor who was making her sister-in-law do all of her meal preparations for her guests.

Who was that lady? I don't know, but she looked lovely. It was her husband's sister. Yeah, it was her sister-in-law. I thought it was the sequel to The Help. Oh, snap. I never saw that movie, so I can't even make that reference.

If she heard that, she'd make you a piece of pie. A nice, good piece of pie. She would burn some bacon for me like she'd make you a piece of pie. Nice, good piece of pie. You would be kicked to the curb. She would burn some bacon for me like she did the other day on the show. You would be kicked to the curb much like Simone wants to do to her nephew. Yeah, that was funny. She's like, no, she done burned my bacon now. By the way, I'd like to say that Dr. Simone's nephew, I think he's adorable.

By the way, I'd like to say that Dr. Simone's nephew, I think he's adorable. From Wondery, this is Black History For Real. I'm Francesca Ramsey. And I'm Conscious Lee. What do most people think about when they hear the words Black History? Rosa Parks, Reconstruction, MLK, February, Black History Month. Exactly, exactly. There are so many stories of black history that we just are not really talking about or thinking about,

especially outside of February. And we are about to flip the script on all of that. Because on this show, you're going to hear a little less. In August 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue. And a little bit more. She is a heroine to some. As a fighter for black rights, she is a villain to others. Follow Black History for Real on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. Listen everywhere on February 5th, or you can listen early and ad-free on Wondery Plus starting January 29th.

Join Wondery Plus on the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Black is beautiful. Academy is a new scripted podcast that follows Ava Richards. Join Wondery Plus on the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. small-town values break in hopes of becoming the first scholarship student to make The List, Bishop Gray's all-coveted academic top 10, curated by the headmaster himself. But after realizing she has no chance at The List on her own, she reluctantly accepts an invitation to a secret underground society that pulls the strings on campus life and academic success. If she bends to their will, she'll have everything she's ever dreamed of. But at what cost? Academy takes you into the world of a cutthroat private school where power, money, and sex collide in a game of life and death. Follow Academy on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts.

You can binge all episodes of Academy early and ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus. Oh, surprise, surprise. No, he really is. He really is. He's adorable. Circle high schools in your car. He's in college. He's in college.

Bears, like for a second. I'm just saying. Did you just say bears as short for barely? Yeah, it's late. Oh, I was wondering what that was. I'm going to shorten all my words now. That's what I do just saying. Did you just say bears as short for barely? Yeah, it's late. Oh, I was wondering what that was about. I'm going to shorten all my words now. That's what I do. Bears.

I like that. I'm just going to sip from my Bud Light in the meantime. Is that what you're drinking? Do you not remember the beginning of the podcast where I discussed drinking Bud Light? Oh, yeah. You need to have another power hour. I don't think I was invited to the last one. You said every... Well, the last one you were not invited to.

That is correct, because I was merely hosting the... The power hour was here, but it was actually not my power hour. Oh, really? Whose power hour was it? And that's not an excuse not to invite me. Well, I wasn't in control of the list. Yeah, that's some bullshit.

Actually, you know what? I think you were invited. I think both of you were invited, so never mind. No, I've never not come. No. This is really fascinating for the listeners listening to our logistics. I will go back on Facebook, and I will look to see who was invited, who was not invited. Either way, I have a huge amount of beer.

This was in February. So I have a lot of beer that I'm still working through. Well, this has been fascinating. Yeah, it's been real fascinating. You know what sucks? There were like some things I really wanted to talk about with marriage medicine and I never – I just can't remember them because I just have not taken them. OK. Well, I have a few other things.

Please. can't remember them because i i just have not taken okay well i have a few other things so what do you think of when when mariah showed up um at the very and you know the final five minutes to jackie's office and then it cuts to her confessional like here we go the principal call me to the office yes that totally is what it is i mean my god why does everybody have to answer to her she's like now listen here this is not how ladies act in medicine yeah i love that it's only in medicine like right everywhere it's like a it's like a chinese fortune cookie instead of in bed you have to end the sentence within medicine you know when we talked about this show a few weeks ago with anna david she brought up this great point which is like this sort of this antiquated notion these wives of doctors have to act in a certain way as if they're like the wives of statesmen

or lords at Downton Abbey. I don't understand what this whole thing is. Well, if you're going to be a wife, a wife, it's an important role for a doctor. I have never heard of that ever. Maybe because I'm not in the medical community, but am I

crazy? No. No, they're fucking ridiculous. But I love that the Jackie doesn't even want to hang out with these women. It's like, she's being forced to hang out with them to be on this TV show. And so she's just going to lecture everybody the whole time. I think Jackie was, I think Jackie was sold a classy show and that's not what this is turning out to be.

Well, I think eventually she's going to, she's going to probably get into it with somebody. I just sense it. Like she's going she's gonna she's gonna probably get into it with somebody i just sense it like she's gonna lose her decorum and finally get into it with somebody no i think she's gonna leave the show as soon as she can because it's honestly a show about ghetto bitches and she is educated and smart and uh articulate so she needs to go yeah but she's obviously desperate for fame why else would she work out so much? That's true, too. She's so shallow.

Yeah, totally. It's not doing us any good. It's weird, because she's an actual professional, so she really can't afford to be a crazy hot mess on TV. As opposed to these quote-unquote professionals that we see on all the

other shows. Cookbook authors and whatnot. Have we reached that point of the night where we're not in sense? I'm trying to think about other things. Mariah is sitting on a blanket with her husband. That was the best part.

That was my favorite part, where she's like, listen, honey, I am sorry. But I'll tell you what, I'm even sorry I didn't really kick that bitch's ass the way I wanted to. Right? She is such a mess. Yeah, and I liked her in the beginning of the season. But now I liked her, and I thought Toya her in the beginning of the season but now i thought i liked her and i thought toya was the the most ghetto of them all but now uh now i actually sort of like toya a little bit but not that much she's still really ghetto i like toya well i like her i like carrie

because carrie's so ridiculous i'm liking them all now just because i'm getting to know them which is the danger of all these shows you they just everything becomes normal you get desensitized to terrible personalities and it's like oh i know her i've watched her for three hours so i know everything about her love her i mean even stupid tamra if she if she got hit by a car or something i'd be sad i i just love with marriage medicine the token five minutes that they throw at some of the doctor's professional lives so you see um you know uh dr simone delivering a baby and talking about the joys and of of medicine and how rewarding it is and you see her being a professional and then you cut to the next scene adds back to the same old shit carrie talking to toya asking for groveling. You know, it's like this weird... And then trying on lingerie.

I'm going to try on some lingerie. I just think it's such a weird juxtaposition of, like, these random moments from, like, some other show, like, from, like, Discovery Network, where they talk about the virtues of medicine and being a doctor and go back to the trashy shit.

Yeah, and I actually, shockingly, like the doctor parts, and I want to see more of them. Yeah, and I actually shockingly like the Doctor parts, and I want to see more of them. And it's not really anything you get together with your friends and gossip about, but it was fun to watch and semi-heartwarming until she said my family too many times, and I was like, enough, we get it. You have a working uterus.

Congratulations, you've changed the world.'t tell that to dr jackie oh close faux business yeah well maybe not where is this season gonna go though i mean i'm clearly way too invested the ratings are doing well but like what is going to happen i mean they keep asking in the next few episodes like mariah do you think you can put this behind you and move forward as a classy lady and have some manners when you're around Toya? But it's like, no. We know she can't be classy. So who's going to fight? Are Jackie and Simone going to get lured into the bullshit even more?

It's someone every week. Every week it will just be some random stupid fight. Well, first of all, I mean I'm wondering how long this season season will be do you think it's going to be like 13 episodes or nine episodes i think the ratings are six no no the ratings are so good right now they are scraping the floor trying to throw together two or three more i'm not even kidding but but either way the the arc is going to be more like oh my god now Mariah and Toya are in the same pet store. And now Mariah and Toya, that's what the arc will be. Because if you think about some of the most successful Real Housewives seasons, they've had some sort of a blowout in the first third of the season.

And then the rest of the season is sort of like dealing with it and how it impacts all the people. Look at Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. like dealing with it and how it impacts all the people look at real housewives of beverly hills um the first season you had the fight in new york between camille and kyle and the entire rest of season was was the fallout from that so this season could work real housewives of beverly hills i mean these women i mean they started fighting in the first five seconds of the show and every week it's been something different god bless this yeah, God bless their little working hearts. I mean, they're really tap dancing still. They're trying their best to put on a good show.

So, you know. It's worked. Toria and Mariah will probably make up next week and then gang up on Carrie. And then, you know, who knows? I hope the doctors keep it classy just because their whole above-it-all attitude is the best thing about the show for me. Yeah. You know, um,

um, Carrie, there's one scene where Carrie was talking with a friend. That was the T scene that we, we talked about earlier. So the girl who clearly was a cast, but is dying to be a friend of, well,

the funny thing was this friend of was entirely too classy for the show. I was like, Oh, you poor thing. You'll never be seen again. You are providing an example of a smart, sophisticated African-American lady. You will not be on reality TV much longer. Bravo will do away with you.

Oh, bravs. Well, we'll see how well this show keeps doing because I think one of the reasons it's been doing so well is because it's after Atlanta. Do you think it's hooked everybody? I think so. Of course. Because the media shit was this fight, and now everyone is totally hooked in. Yeah.

So I'm kind of excited to see this marriage one because they've shown the preview so many times. It looks so good. The first newlyweds thing? Yeah, at first I thought I'm not going to watch that. Now that I've seen it, it's like a Katy Perry song. Every time I hear one, I'm like,

this fucking piece of shit. I hear it three more times and I'm like, that's brilliant. It hypnotizes me. I'll watch it if you guys watch it yeah hell yeah i'm gonna watch it i'm so people in love crying and staying with each other because they're afraid they're not going to be able to find anybody else well and one couple is like creepy plastic ballroom dancers i'm in yeah and the gay guy i pay more i'll watch it a few episodes but there's no guarantees i'm a little afraid it's going to be a little generic in the realm of la shrinks oh don't let me start la shrinks that lady was on with tamra and i felt so bad for her because she was so awkward and you've got tamra like screaming and drunk and yelling and like giving satan signs because she's so happy to be evil and then the shrink from la

shrinks was just like i believe in being thankful and grateful every day that's that's my best advice to anybody and so you could hear you know when when you're in a show or something and there's silence and you can hear the buzzing of the lights. Yeah. You mean like this podcast? Yes. At that point, yes, of this podcast. Like when I'm doing my Karen impersonation? Your what impersonation?

Like when I'm doing my Karen impersonation too long. And no one's saying anything, so I just keep talking? No, that's not even you. That's just me and Matt, like, staring at a wall. I know you do. Staring at a wall? Yeah, or just, like, you know, you can't think of something to say, so you're just like, oh, well, I just think, well, Matt will say something now. Here's the problem.

When we start podcasting at, like, 11 o'clock at night and there's alcohol involved i i don't know i just there's no guarantees yeah it's no guarantees yeah we go from like yeah like crash that's why the that's why the first podcast the last episode was like insane mania and we're just like making all these weird like Lydia impersonations of her on a rollercoaster and then half of this podcast has been devoted to us saying

what else maybe we should start with Married to Medicine next time I would love that because I actually I really really enjoy it i'm in i'm in well also one of you guys usually takes notes i can't i didn't do it this i didn't do it this week i normally do but then i feel like i am the head mistress like whether you want to call me you're the dr jackie whether you call me the dr jackie or the mrs garrett i just

like i'm the evil taskmaster. And sometimes I just want to have fun, too. Since when was Mrs. Garrett the evil taskmaster? Okay, fine. Aunt Bev. Oh, my God. Is that Cloris Leachman's name? Yes.

I just always thought of her as Cloris Leachman. Yeah, me too, actually. I never knew what her character's name was. I actually felt bad for Cloris Leachman because I didn't really know who she was at that time. I just knew her from Facts of Life, and I hated her for not being Mrs. Garrett. And then I didn't discover until I was an adult what a wonderful human being Cloris Leachman is.

I liked her. What was the name of their store on that show? Edna's Edibles? No, no, no. That burned down, and it became something like merchandise. What? It was a candy shop. It was a merchant what it was a candy shop it was something that had a name it was there was lots of like neon inflatable palm trees yeah i'm looking it up um god i miss the fucking 80s in 1987 88 was the best time ever really uh mckay

what was his name mckenzie whatever what was austin Austin Mackenzie? Mackenzie Austin? Andy, he played Andy I'm looking it up I hated in the 80s how you had to like Tighten your pant cuffs and roll them up Because I'm knock kneed and that's like The worst look but if you didn't do it Everyone's like why isn't he Tightening his pant cuffs and rolling them up

It's called pegging your jeans Hello Pegging your jeans. Hello. By the way, the gift shop, it was a gift shop. Give us a clue. Don't just release the crack and give me a clue.

Okay. I don't know how to give a clue. I just have to tell you what the gift shop is. Was it a gift shop or was it a candy shop? It was a gift shop that the girls ran together. You guys want to know what it was called? The letter, just tell me the letter it starts with. Oh. I don't know.

We'll have to do the whole answer but you don't know the first letter. Yeah, the gift shop was called Over Our Heads. Oh no. That's terrible. That's worse than Cousin Jerry. I also remember the episode when Natalie had sex with Snake, was it? Snake, her boyfriend.

She was the first to lose her virginity. And before the episode aired, there was, like, a special message that was, like, the contents of this episode are, like, adult nature, and parental guidance is suggested. Was that like she had sex with Snake? Very special episode. I was like, oh, that's cute. Do you remember the best episode where they came back from a horror movie, and I want to say Joe was

having terrible nightmares. Yes, that was scary. Everybody was getting murdered, and George Clooney was in that episode, and he was hanging up in the closet and Blair died. Blair was like a doll. Yeah, her hair got big. Her hair got huge, right? And Natalie died because she got strangled by a pair of

fuzzy dice. It was so stupid, but I was terrified when I was seven. I was so scared of that episode. Do you remember the episode? Were you scared when you were 24? Oh my god. I'm like, yeah yeah i hang out with the robot from uh small wonder vicky you and vicky yeah did harriet come over in the window and edie mcclure wait i wouldn't be surprised if edie mcclure lives in one of our buildings

she probably does she's my landlady actually mrs pool is my landlady, actually. Mrs. Poole is my landlady. No. Do you remember the Facts of Life episode when they are in Santa Monica or something, and they leave the hot tub on the second floor on, and then they walk in, and the ceiling collapses, and it's like, to be continued. And I was like, oh my god. The ceiling caved in. How are they going to get out of this mess? Oh my god.

90s, I mean 80s TV. Hot tub over on is a struggle that I have dealt with ever since I was a child. It's a private struggle. But it is something I have dealt with. Oh, Kerry. I'll give you a check. Just forgive me. How much do you want?

I would prefer if you PayPal'd it. I am going to invoice you for the cost of Facts of Life seasons 1 through 4 that I have purchased on DVDs that you have destroyed in the party like them she would like some travelers checks facts of life seasons one through four were a gift to duncan it is his favorite show okay um so have we i think we've reached great i think

we've reached the natural end considering we've actually moved on to an entirely different show from several decades ago watch what crap ends and the facts of life watch what's of life well you know our a lot of our users do want us to talk about other shows you know what you got you know what by the way you guys should both come on to banter with ben and lisa if you guys want to come on that. I would love a formal invitation written and sent to me in the mail with an extra stamp on it. I'm sending a formal invitation. If you guys both would like to come on to the show

this week, we tape on Thursdays. What time? We're flexible. What topics? Usually the afternoon. The topics are pretty much anything. It's a very open format. Last week we talked about Tyler Perry's Temptation. Did you guys go see it without me?

I saw it last... Oh, I'm sorry, Matt. I saw it last Wednesday. I would go. I don't have Tennis League on Wednesday nights anymore. I would love to go. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry you didn't get to go because Tyler Perry's Temptation was the laugh out loud comedy of the year. I am going to nomout-loud comedy of the year.

I am going to nominate it for all of the Razzie Awards when I get my ballot. When it comes out on video, I'm going to have a Temptation viewing party because it was so awful. So, so bad, but perfectly bad. Can we spoil it? Can we spoil the end for Ronnie? Because I read all about it. How dare you, sir? Well, I'm going to say this, though.

I had no idea about the big twist when I saw it, so, and neither did anyone I was watching it with, so when that twist came, it was, we all laughed out loud. Just tell Ronnie the twist. It's hilarious. Wait, are we allowed to do that? What if people haven't seen Temptation? Turn off, okay. If they haven't seen it,

if they haven't seen it yet, that's... You have five seconds to turn off the podcast before I spoil Temptation. Okay, we're only going to talk about it for 20 seconds. So turn it off now. Okay. Okay, the big twist that made us all laugh was that it turns out that they all have HIV. Are you kidding me?

Well, what happens is the hot guy, the social media guy, turns out he has HIV and he gave it to Brandy, but he also gave it to Journey Smollett. And basically at the end of the movie, because she cheated, she winds up alone, miserable, and with HIV. And dying with HIV. And the only person who didn't get it is her, like the good guy. Her virtuous husband. That she cheated on. That she should have stayed with anyway because he's super hot.

his husband that she cheated on that she should have stayed with anyway because he's super hot but this also kind of did happen in four colored girls another tyler perry movie because janet jackson had an undercover brother husband who slept around and got hiv and then i think he gave it to her too so like tyler perry what are you trying to say boo i i actually heard about that and it's actually as much as i'm saying it's a really funny thing uh it's actually really fucked up the messages that this movie sends please don't watch temptation and try to take anything away from it because it's not give tyler perry any money okay since we talked about this exhaustively on banter with ben and lisa you guys can all go and download that podcast and listen to that but in the meantime i say we wrap this one up oh my god it's after's after 1 o'clock. I have to go watch more

Bravo. Yeah, I dropped the mic an hour ago. Yeah. Alright, well, everyone, thanks for listening. Matt is at Life on the M-List. Ronnie is at TVGaz and I'm at B-Side Blog. This is all on Twitter, of course. You can follow this show on Twitter at

WhatCrapHands, but more importantly, follow us on Facebook at Facebook.com forward slash WatchWhatCrapPins. Lots and lots and lots of funny stuff on there. We are not joking. This is serious. We are serious. And people, even if you are listening and streaming this on Stitcher, it would really benefit us if you would also download it as a podcast from iTunes. New episodes will go live tomorrow being Wednesday. If you are listening to this now on Stitcher, go download it and a podcast from iTunes. New episodes will go live tomorrow being Wednesday.

If you are listening to this now on Stitcher, go download it and leave us comments. There was only two new comments left on the page last week, and it really hurts my heart deeply. And if you're not listening to it on Stitcher, you should listen to it on Stitcher. That way we can get a higher ranking. We're like number 44. You should really be listening to it on Stitcher while you're downloading it on your iPod, and then you can listen to it a second time on the drive home in the traffic. And then putting money in our PayPal

accounts, just to be nice. Yeah, stream it on Stitcher, and put it on YouTube. And remember her to remember your code word is Bravo for Oh my god. Sherry's Berries and Shave, okay?

The lady from Sherry's Berries called Ronnie a pig. It was hilarious. I don't know why she did that. She didn't mean to. What I was saying is that Roddy had the extra berries and she thought I said Ronnie and then she called him a pig on the conference call. Yeah, we said something like, yeah, Roddy keeps

eating ours instead of sending them to us. And she's like, yeah, Roddy keeps eating ours instead of sending them to us. And she's like, yeah, Roddy's a pig. I was like, whoa. But we're still shilling. We're still shilling. And we were on a conference call with that other guy who was like a strange straight man who was like, what the fuck with these three queens and their berries? Honestly, our conference call with Sherry's berries, that was a strange moment in my life. That was a really funny one.

And Matt. That took up in episode 72. You totally have corporate meeting mentality. Yes, you're great. Say something in a meeting so that people know that you're paying attention. That makes me crazy in meetings. And sure enough, I'm like, okay, I'm ready for this shit to be over. And we're all texting back and forth that we just want this to be over.

And then Matt's like, well, so let me get this straight. You're going to send us a copy and an email of exactly what you'd like because we'd love that you've given us this opportunity. And she's like, I would love to. Just make sure that pig Ronnie reads it properly. Make sure Ronnie

doesn't eat the copy. I put my skill set to use.erry's i thought matt was great because because no one else wanted to say anything and matt chimed in perfectly um and i hope they don't pull the ads actually i was wearing a headset you know like the time life lady because that's what i wear when i'm at work and i'm on those corporate calls and i was just like i flipped open my book to page 36 and i read the script i just inserted sherryry's Berries in the blank. Listen, we like Sherry's Berries and we're happy to advertise and you guys should all – when you guys go to berries.com, enter and watch. That way we get credit because if you just go to berries.com and buy your strawberries without saying watch, we don't get credit and they're going to pull.

You have to give us the credit. Otherwise, this will be all for nothing. We're going to lose our advertiser our advertiser who calls funny a pig we wouldn't want to dare lose her because those conference calls are pure fucking gold and actually when i got off that call my co-worker says to me was like number one what the fuck was that and number two she goes was that for sherry's berries i ordered them for my mom for christmas and she loves them no they're supposed to be great they're great i mean like we're joking about because we had a sales rep who was just like crazy they are go-getters i'm telling you they're like okay

we need to have a conference call okay guys here's what sherry's berries for 10 minutes they're berries and they're from a company called sherry's and they basically they take their berries and they cover them in chocolate you guys they're amazing and you know they're and our competitors i tried i tried our competitors and they suck but you know what don't mention that don't mention that we won't we only want to talk about the good things well and then i said yeah we're very familiar with this they've been running ads all on logo and bravo for the past few months and then she went back into the spiel like i had not just said we know what the fuck you're talking about. I know. I was like, am I supposed to buy some Sherry's

berries? Would you shut up? She's like, well, you know how wonderful they are, because you sell them. They are a product that you guys are familiar with, because we sent them to you, right, guys? You've all had them. We have not received a single Sherry's berry. I have not received a berry! I have not received a single

berry drizzled in white chocolate. To though To be fair though they have sent them But they sent them to the Sideshow Network So we haven't received them yet That's okay I'm totally fine with that And I'm happy to have them as advertisers But those were some crazy Conference calls Yeah that was just a corporate disaster

Okay by the way This all is staying in the podcast. Do not cut any of the past. I think so. I think it's hilarious. They're cool. Actually, I will say this. They are cool, and Sherry's Barriers are cool. They're down with it. They like this stuff. We've given them so much airtime now. Yeah, we've said Sherry's Barriers.

They have more airtime than Married to Medicine. More than the shaving one. What was the shaving one again? Well, at least the Sherry's Barriers. Dollar Shave Club? Real. It wasn't fake. That was, those were some real characters. So you like the berries?

We know you like them, guys. We know. We can tell how much. She was forcing me to like the berries. You know, I actually felt bad for her because, you know, she's had to do this spiel about 10 different times over the course of that day. So she has this, like, perky thing. Yeah, she's, like, picking a scowl. And you know she wants to, when she gets that phone call So she has this like perky. Yes. She's like picking us.

I didn't know who she wants to, when she gets that phone call, she's like someone to get me a fucking cigarette. No kidding. And then she's got to deal with the ass and I'm not talking about Matt, but the other guy who was on the phone was like, well, I just like to take this time to say thank you so much for advertising.

Who was that guy? I don't know, but I thought he was on her team and then I realized he was another blog. I was like, you've got to be kidding. Well, there were two of them plus him, right? What? Yeah. Yeah, there was like two corporate people and then there was the kiss ass who just kept

anytime there was a lull in the conversation, he'd be like, well, let me take this opportunity to say I love Sherry's Berries. I appreciate getting to advertise for you guys. What the hell are you, accepting an Oscar? Shut the fuck up. Get off the stage.

Oh, my God. That was such an amazing conference call. So, everyone, if you guys want to hear more of these stories of our corporate conference calls, go to berries.com. And please put in the code word WATCH. Don't put in anything else. You have please put in the code word watch don't put in anything else you have to put in the code word otherwise we don't get credit if we get if we sell a lot of these berries then we get to be wealthy is anybody else sad though about me not being the voice of that gay sex toy um website because that was hilarious well now you're the voice of dollar shave club yeah oh i am pretty much pretty much same same uh same areas of the body yeah exactly more or less i think they were like they were

this copy was all about like don't you hate those rusty razors and i'm like trust i hate a rusty razor when you're manscaping you don't want a rusty razor up there that's what they wanted you to talk right there that's being real right there where you're like hey ronnie you know what sucks having stubble on your balls you know it sucks slicing your penis open on the rusty razor well yeah because then you have one do you have guys one of those sticks when you shave like if you nick yourself, and it's called a septic stick? Oh, no. But I remember... It's like a big, salty stick, and it's white, and then it seals the blood. Yeah.

I don't have one, but I know about those. What is wrong with you, Matt? What is wrong with you? Are you using a machete on yourself? I take my shaving very seriously. Yeah. How did they shave their balls before they had razors? I don't think they shaved their balls.

They didn't. You ever see porn from the 70s? Oh my God. I thought President Bush was in office. If that's what banter with Ben and Lisa is like, count me the fuck out. It is. Love you, XOXO.

I feel like we just had a a sample of panther with ben and lisa without lisa because we've been talking for 10 minutes about nothing pertaining to bravo whatsoever everybody quit right now right no one's still anybody's still listening you know the only person listening right now is tammy i think once they heard us all drop the mic in 10 minutes into the second podcast they're like okay time to finish who do you think is listening right now is Tammy. I think once they heard us all drop the mic and 10 minutes into the second podcast, they were like, okay, time to finish. Who do you think is listening right now? I would say Michael Cook. Eddie McGee.

Eddie McGee. Only if they have it playing while they're trying to sleep. I think Nicole Johan. Nicole is definitely, Tammy is definitely listening. You said Michael Cook, right? Michael Cook, for sure. i think our two friends jose and abigail whatever the ones who took pictures with andy uh they're listening um jesus um who

secretly is the cutest thing on the he is the cutest thing ever he he's he's a an adorable young man he's like is he over 18? I don't know. If he is, it doesn't matter because I've already got my eyes on Dr. Simone's nephew, as you remember. Oh, gross. You're such a perv. Wait, he's got like a whole beard. People can grow beards when they're like five or 15. No kidding.

It's because of all the hormones in milk. He's in college. That's why there's so many gay people. He is in college or was in college. Either way, he's legal. He dropped out of college to be a friend of the house or the friend of the married to medicine folk. You know who I think is also listening? I think Taylor Hawken and Jutes Holtzman, I think.

By the way, if I were straight, she would be my wife. I'm not even kidding you. I love her. I love her. I bet Honey Bunny is listening. A.K.A. Dee Johnson. No. No? I think they all quit.

Lauren is listening. Lauren Manzo?zo you guys this is like when you're teenagers and you're talking on the phone you're like bye it's like we're doing a three-way call it's like a three-way call in 1994 and we're all painting our nails right now like laying on a bear skin rug talking on a lips phone what are you doing what are you watching i'll watch it too i feel like OMG. You know how this is listening. Aqua Blue Princess. I'm also obsessed with her. She's one of our faves.

Oh god. The worst part is that people are going to like this part the most. They're going to be like, can you please stop talking about Bravo and start talking about this? Well, another hour was like, what happened? What are we talking about? These shows suck.

I hate these shows. You guys, I have social studies tomorrow. OMG, I forgot to mention Yummy Wasabi. I started following her. Oh, I love her. Okay, so I'm obsessed with her too, so I started following her on Instagram, and she wrote me this note about, like, you just made

my life, and I'm like, I am a stupid podcaster. But sure, I'm glad I made your life. And I'm like, I am a stupid podcaster. But, sure, I'm glad I made your life. No, I like her Instagram feed. Everyone follow Yummy Wasabi on Instagram. Yummy Wasabi is kind of awesome. Not going to lie. Christine, what up?

Okay, let's end this. And that Jesus Robert Garza. What's up, boo? He's cute. He's cute. And he's, like, all sweaty in his recent photo. Yeah, I saw that. That was, like, sweaty in his recent photo. Yeah. I saw that. That was like, that was strange.

That was a strange choice. He likes to do, um, he likes tanning bed, not gonna lie. Um, and he likes to post photos of himself getting out of a tanning bed, all moist.

Yeah. This one was, uh, this one was, it was a provocative image. He is our pal that went to see Andy. I want to say in Chicago and then told Andy to be that he better listen to our podcast,

which makes him the best listener ever. Yeah. Well well i'm trying to find him now on the old twitter he's there he's there don't worry don't worry he will make his presence known especially now oh damn he has way more followers than me that is inappropriate how many followers does he have 716 what yes he's bigger than i am too how many followers do you have on there? I don't know. I've got like 5200 or something. Wow. That's really good. No, on Twitter. I'm talking about Instagram. Oh, well, that's the thing.

If you take pictures of yourself, especially if they're shirtless, you're going to get like a thousand followers right there. Oh, well, then I should have lost this tank top before I posted the recent selfie. Oh, on that note, why don't we wrap this one up? Oh, I love that my body makes you ill. It does.

No, you look really good. I saw Matt in the party the other day. Haven't you seen Tyler Perry's Temptation? You're tempting me, Matt, and you're going to give me HIV as a result. That's how this podcast ended. We just all die on the air. Wait, who was the one? Ronnie, were you the one that posted something on the Facebook page this week that was like something that was like there was sexual

tension between me and ben who posted that on facebook no one of the listeners did they said something about the sexual tension and i said yeah they should just bone already like i commented on it but i didn't i didn't start it yeah i think you also hit the like button i didn't even see that yeah because that's my because my body makes you ill. Sexual tension is out of control. That's so like a love letter in a gay couple. I'm sending you some... You're disgusting.

Let's get married. Matt, I'm going to send you some Shari's Berries to profess my love to you. You just want to fatten me up so I can repulse you more. I saw Matt the other day at Target. It was so weird seeing you in real life. That was kind of weird, wasn't it? Kind of. And were you wearing sunglasses? Yes. You were,

right? Is it weird that I wear them inside? Yes. Wait, you wear sunglasses inside Target? It was a sunny Saturday afternoon and I will say this. Who do you think you are? Faye Dunaway? Look, bitch, they are prescription and I didn't have. Who do you think you are? Faye Dunaway? Look, bitch. They are prescription and I didn't have my real prescription glasses on.

Okay, that's what I was going to say because I was thinking, well, maybe he's wearing those glasses that when it's really bright, they get darker. No, I don't have creepy glasses that tint. Those are fucking Ray-Bans, but they are prescription

and I didn't have my regular glasses. What was so weird about it is when I saw you, I hugged you. You did like a triple take. Like, I thought you were like, who am I talking to? I didn't recognize you at first, yeah. So, well, you know, once we were talking, I did.

But, you know, it was just out of context. I wasn't expecting to see you in real life. I then felt really bad. And then later at night, I was like, was he wearing sunglasses? I didn't even notice it at the time. It wasn't until later, I was like, is my memory fucking with me?

When you walked away, I felt bad because I did this unintentionally. But you were buying a fan because it was hot. And I looked at that. And then I looked at everything else in your cart. And I was judging you based on what you were purchasing. Oh, I know. You totally sized my cart up. Right.

Like, normally I would look somebody up and down. But then I totally scanned your cart. Like, what is he buying? You totally did. And I walked away. away and i was like that is so mad just you probably knew how much that shit cost me to get out of there too oh my god 39.55 did you have the wait did you have the tranny checkout lady no you know what i did see her again there are two of them there are two trainees by the way people who are listening from elsewhere there are tranny checkout ladies at our target yeah but they're really nice one though has scary why wouldn't they be it's like a rescue center have you watched drag race okay yeah that's true but one of them has scary jagged fingernails and

i don't like a jagged fingernail um you know matt Matt, by the way, I was catching up on my Mad Men from this season. I watched the first episode, and there appears to be a new character who looks just like you. What? On Mad Men Now? On Mad Men Now, he's, like, one of the new, like, copywriters at Don Draper's agency. He works with—I forget't i i forget their characters names like the jewish guy in the office oh like the super nice guy did you just say that i look jewish no i said you you look like the guy who works with the jewish guy i'll i'll bring up a yes i'll i'll take a picture but this it's it's it's okay it's mad men it's okay it's very it's very prestigious

yeah i'm kind of nervous right now you're gonna go to the end you know what you know what forget i brought it up i feel like i'm gonna make you mad has he only been in this season uh yeah i've only watched the first episode of the season so i don't know about the so is he the guy who's waiting in the waiting room and like sending a funeral no no that's the guy from happy endings no this guy he's just like he's like a little side character oh just like i am on this and he's not the guy that hired last year the young guy who lives with his dad and right right no this guy is now working with that guy oh i think that matt kind of looks like that guy the jewishy guy kind of i don't know i don't see it i don't i don't i don't know what the character's name is so it's making me a little crazy for the record for everyone

listening at home i've tried to end this podcast about five times already is it ken is it ken cosgrove or pete campbell or harry crane listen no offense but you are not ken cosgrove ken cosgrove ken cosgrove is like tall and blonde i'm not james walk from happy endings i'm not john slattery and i'm definitely not elizabeth moss i'm uh you know what you are it's elizabeth moss i am the elizabeth moss of this podcast no No, no, no. I'm Betty. Betty? I love bitchy Betty now. Yeah, I'm like Betty now.

Not the Grace Kelly Betty, but the one who's like coming unhinged. Guys, guys, I really like that we're talking about this because it shows that we watch classy TV also. Yeah, you guys, you see, we're smart. High art and low art. There is no room for the anything in between. No. What do you guys you see we're smart high art and low art there is no room for the anything in between no what do you guys think of the new facebook hated it the new facebook what's the difference would you tell me because everybody's on facebook like oh my god the new facebook oh my god it looks the same to me by the way i actually i do want to apologize well i don't have to apologize but for the people who come to our page and leave comments,

Facebook has this annoying thing now on pages where they try to prioritize comments. So if a comment has a bunch of likes or they think it's a relevant comment, it goes to the top of the list. So if you write a new comment— That's true. I hate that that it's so it's so annoying because you can't see the latest you have to like go and dig through and to look at like it goes this one's from three hours ago this one's from 45 minutes ago this one's from two days ago it drives me nuts we don't know how to fix it i'm sorry oh so that's maybe that's what people are talking about it doesn't look that different to me but now i see what you're talking about and that's not cool yeah it's a really really annoying feature like you can't

just see what you can't see what the newest comments are since you last logged in you have to like look through and read through all the comments over and over and over again and try to remember which ones are new fuck this dude ken cosgrove on madman is hot he's a tall blonde when he's cute man yeah he's like eating he's like eating a bowl of matzo ball soup it's like he's all cracker he's like filled to the core with cracker do you think that i look like harry crane from no i'm telling you harry crane's an established character i will find the character i will put it on our facebook page and you can all write comments out of order. You must put it on our Facebook page.

Alright, I gotta find it now, then. He doesn't even have a name, this character. Mad Men. So I'm not famous? I can't watch Mad Men week to week. I have to save that shit up and watch it all at one time. It's not Ted Chow? No, not him.

I'm telling you, Matt, I don't know what his character is. He doesn't even have a name, this character. Mad Men. So I'm not famous? I can't watch Mad Men week to week. I have to save that shit up and watch it all at one time. It's not Ted Chowgashaw. No, not him.

I'm telling you, Matt, I don't know what his character's name is. He's had like three lines. All right. I'm pulling the plug Matt, I don't know what his character's name is. He's had like three lines. All right. I'm pulling the plug on this podcast. This is terrible. We're now browsing the internet and comparing notes. Enough.

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