Watch What Crappens - #91: The Brooks Showdown We've Been Waiting For

Episode Date: August 28, 2013

This week on "Watch What Crappens," Ben Mandelker (bsideblog.com) and Matt Whitfield (Yahoo!) break down every moment of the RHOC reunion, from Alexis playing catch to Brooks being one shady bastard. Then it's on to "Miami" for more Lea/Adriana intrigue and finally some fun with "New Jersey," "Eat Drink Love," and even some "Below Deck." Plus, gossip about Taylor Armstrong and reliving some "Gallery Girls" nostalgia. Come on in! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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$1.99. This is really, really a great deal. You're saving like $10 or $12. Go do it. GoDaddy.com. Crappins. Hey, everyone. Welcome to Watch What Crappins, a podcast dedicated to all that crap we love on Bravo.

My name is Matt Whitfield from Yahoo Entertainment, and joining me as always is Ben Mandelker from B-Side Blog. Say hello, Ben. Hello, the world. I like when you use hand signals for all of our deaf podcast listeners. Hello, hello. I probably just cursed them all off by accident. You probably did. That was probably some sign language, rude sign language that we are unaware of. But anyway, thank you for joining us today, everybody. As you will notice, Ronnie Karam from Trash Talk TV is not with us. I believe that he has gone to Texas for a wedding,

which sounds awful. Yeah, I would never do such a thing. has gone to Texas for a wedding, which sounds awful. Yeah, I would never do such a thing. Unless it was a hunky wedding, then I would go. Well, that's completely understandable. Anyway, thank you guys for joining us. We are now video casting this episode right now, but you can also find the podcast later on iTunes and Stitcher. Don't forget to get involved with us on Facebook. We are facebook.com forward slash watch what crap ends. You can find us as a group on Twitter at what crap ends. You can find Ben at B side blog,

and you can find me at life on the M list. And don't forget Ronnie. We'll give him a shout out to, you can find him on Twitter at trash tweet TV. Yes. And he's also on other platforms, but he's not consistent with his, with his names. So we're not even to bother trying to send you to them.

Just go to his Twitter, and you'll be set. So today, without Ronnie here cracking the whip, we're probably going to go a little bit shorter than normal. So those of you stuck in traffic for an hour and a half, you're going to have about a half hour less than normal, because Ben and I are trying to be efficient today. Yeah, and by the way, we say this every single week, so clearly we're going for two about a half hour less than normal because Ben and I are trying to be efficient today. Yeah, and by the way, we say this every single week, so clearly we're going for two and a half hours. Clearly, clearly. It's going to be like – remember back in the day when you would go to the video store and you'd rent one of those VHSs and you'd see that it would be like a double VHS box? Oh, like The Godfather or something like that or Schindler's List?

Like The Godfather or Ben, her or Schindler's List. They always had that double VHS box. And I always thought like, oh, I can't commit. Can't commit. I know. I'm surprised that anyone commits to our podcast, to be honest. Listen, you only have to listen to 15 minutes and that's fine. It's true.

It's true. But apparently people are really invested. Our numbers on Facebook are through the roof. So thank you all for participating there. It's a hell of a lot of fun. And thank you again also for the very nice comments that you leave on iTunes. And for those of you who've never left us an iTunes comment, get your butts over there. We need five stars. And we really like it when you pump up our egos and write really nice things about us because we are sad and pathetic and we really need that

boost of confidence at the end of a really long day. We really do need it. And one way you could also help with that is if you like us on Facebook, because we're at like 1,900 followers. And if we can get to 2,000, that would be awesome. Just for no real reason, just for our own egos. Right. There's not like a present or a prize for any of you. It just, again, I like when my ego is massaged, among other things. I like massages in all forms and varieties.

Sort of like a Mario Singer massage, or maybe a Ramona Singer massage for Mario involving lots of oils and a New York City suite. Actually, that is a massage I would never want, actually. But for our egos. For my ego, yes. I will take any kind of ego massage available. Anyway, before we get into things today, we're obviously going to be talking about Real Housewives of Orange County, the reunion part three, which was explosive. And I know Ronnie is dying because he's not here with us. We'll also touch on Eat, Drink, Love, Real Housewives of Miami, Below Deck.

And I'm still watching some of the Jeff Lewis shows. I think I'm probably alone there. but we will get to all of those. But before that, we should talk a little gossip. Do you have anything you want to bring up? You know, I feel like I had a really good story to share, and I cannot remember it for the life of me. So no gossip on my end. I was reading earlier today that Teresa and Joe Giudice

got into a fight with police over like a $5 bill or something. Did you hear anything about that earlier today? That sounds like a gross exaggeration because clearly, clearly they would get into a fight over a $1 bill. You know, it was probably some tips, you know, it was probably some tips from the,

the pizza parlor that was probably a front for an illegal activity of some sort. Maybe it was the, it was a fight over the valet at the Brownstone or even better at a cafés. If cafés has a valet, we should just go kill ourselves. Because clearly we're in the wrong line of business. And if Lauren Manzo is more successful than the two of us, that is a problem.

Well, she's a businesswoman now. She's a businesswoman. She doesn't have time for Vito or parking her own car. So clearly there is a valet, an egg salad valet. An egg salad valet. Thank you. It's actually like, it's like, it's like Thomas on, on down Abbey. He's, he actually comes with a little, someone comes over to you with a little silver tray and opens a dome and under it is egg salad. You know what, when you, uh, valet your car at a lot of places in Los Angeles, which the other funny thing is you have to valet your car at

ridiculous places like Target and, you know, places that is you have to valet your car at ridiculous places like Target and places that should not have valets. But when you do that, a lot of times you'll get back into your car and you'll have a bottle of water from the Beverly Hills Hotel or something like that. But if you did your valet at cafes, you'd get in and in your cup holder would probably be a little plastic solo cup

filled with egg salad. I don't even think there'd even be a cup. I think it's just loose egg salad in the cup holder. You know, like when you go to Amazon and you want to buy like a cable for cheap, it doesn't even come in packaging. It's just like in the plastic bag. That's what the egg salad is. Just loose discount egg salad, courtesy of Caface. For some reason, I think the phrase loose egg salad is pretty much up there with the other disgusting words that I don't like to use, such as slacks, panties, and moist, or especially panties. She's got some loose egg salad down there.

That is really disgusting. I mean, I'm sure her father will be able to give her an egg salad rejuvenation in addition to her lap band surgery. Have you ever really smelled egg salad? Have you ever thought about what that would smell like if there was loose egg salad in your car? This is probably not going to blow your mind because you know me well enough here, but I have never had egg salad in my life, and I've never had a deviled egg because they terrify me.

Okay, real quickly, egg salad, I don't get it. I think egg salad is really disgusting. Deviled eggs, I've had some recently because they're sort of like new deviled eggs are coming back. They are really good, Matt. I would look into them. Isn't egg salad just deviled eggs chopped up with mayonnaise? I don't know. Maybe someone could highlight that.

I don't know, but I feel like egg salad smells like grossness. It smells like sulfuric feces, whereas deviled eggs taste lovely. So I think there must be some difference. They just look creepy, and I think of dead baby chickens when I look at them. And perhaps we should have Kat O'Dell from Eat, Drink, Love on the podcast to help us discuss the uh the pros and cons of of deviled eggs but i'm thinking that she probably doesn't want to come on uh watch what crap happens after the mean tweets that i sent out uh last go on about her please go on i mean we'll get to eat drink love in a minute here but cat odell is horrifying and the fact that you kind of know

her makes me really gross i mean it doesn't make me gross it makes her gross or you kind of know her makes me really gross. I mean, to say that I know her. It doesn't make me gross. It makes her gross. Or you gross. You know what? It makes everyone gross. And I really don't know her very well at all. But I do know I've been talking to various food bloggers about town.

Because everyone's like, are you watching it? Are you watching it? And I'm like, well, of course I'm watching it. And I was like, is this sort of the way she is? And so I spoke to one food blogger last week, and she was like, here's the thing with Kat O'Dell. She's the sort of girl where you run into her at a food event, and then she pretends like she doesn't know who you are

or doesn't remember who you are, and then does like a faux shy thing the whole rest of the night. And I'm like, you know what? I could see that, and I would hate that. A lot about her does seem faux, and I just can't believe for the life of me that she has any friends because she's horrible. So on Twitter, last week I was watching the show

like in the middle of the night. I think it was catching up. I don't think that I got on board initially with you and Ronnie, but now I'm fully invested. Yes. I tweeted. It was on the night where everybody was posting pictures about the moon looking all crazy in L.A.,

and it was pissing me off because my entire Twitter feed was filled up with moon pictures. And I wrote, dear everyone, I don't care about your incessant moon pics. I only care about my supreme hatred for Kat O'Dell, gaseous star of hashtag eat, drink, love. The funny thing is one of her co-stars who clearly dislikes her retweeted me was it brenda it was let me find here who is this just jess la who is the little the little girl the little munchkin girl on eat drink love who likes to tell everybody that she weighs 100 pounds and is only 5 8 or something like that yeah she had to work hard she had to to work hard to get Harry Morton's approval. She had to work hard. Yeah, so I just found it really

funny that she retweeted me or favorited it or something, but then on Twitter she still does hashtag at Kat underscore Odell for certain things, but maybe she is a frenemy, or she's nice to Kat's face, but behind her back she's talking shit, which I love. I love when cast members really hate each other behind their backs.

Some of these reality stars are also gluttons for punishment let's not forget one year ago when we when we were enjoying the wonder and the splendor of gallery girls wait moment of silence okay okay uh that was like a true moment of silence that was not not even sarcastic. I know, right? I mean, I posted that thing on Facebook this week about the 15 reasons why we missed the show. And, God, it really struck a chord with our diehard fans on Facebook. Let's get to that in a moment. Before we do that, though, a year ago when that was on, we would talk so much about Gallery Girls. And then Maggie from Gallery Girls loved it.

And she started following at least me out maybe you guys too and like tweeting at us and she loved it and even though we talk so much shit you know sometimes people just enjoy being talked about you know what they also love they also love a good ben mandelkirn name drop they do a podcast would not be complete without one of those you know know, and I have so many. I have so many to offer. You do. Now, wait. Your personal memory.

Was Maggie the one who was afraid to walk on broken glass in Brooklyn? Yes. Yes. She also would play with her hair, and she would whine a lot. She was like, I don't want to do this. And she was also the one that would complain about people's hideous apartments, and she lived in that shitty-looking hovel. Yes, absolutely. You know, Gallery Girls,

a year on, we should have done a retrospective. Gallery Girls, one year later, because it really was probably the best Bravo show of the past ten years. I feel like it really was. Of the past ten years would be the history of the network, so just come in. It was the best Bravo show of all time.

Especially now that a year has passed, BuzzFeed, i hate buzzfeed but buzzfeed did um an article which matt was just alluding to what was it like the top 17 things that we miss about gallery girls one year on and it opened so many wounds for me ben like. Like, by wounds, I mean happy wounds. Like, scabs that I wanted to pick and have, like, the oozing, gross characters of that show. And I call them characters because those cannot be real people. But, like, it just brought up

so many things that I miss about that show. And to be honest with you, we are horrible people for not doing a proper one-year retrospective. However, may I put this out there as a suggestion? Last year, we did our first annual Crappie Awards for Watch for Crappins, and I'm thinking that, like how MTV has the Video Vanguard Award for, and Justin just won that, the Michael Jackson Video Vanguard Award. May I suggest that we come up with a Video Vanguard-esque award at the

Crappies this year that um is brought to you by gallery girls yeah i would be totally for that because honestly if you go to that buzzfeed article and the link is on our facebook page um you see there's they put up a bunch of gifs and of course the gifs always have like little subtitles and some of these quotes that have just sort of like i've forgotten about seeing them just written down you just realize the genius of this show and the one problem with the buzzfeed article is that it focuses excessively on angela and angela is very funny but there were so many other brilliant characters on that show that didn't even make

it to the article it's really it makes me sad it brings it brings it brings a botox tear to my eye in which and by that of course i mean there's no tear whatsoever but I can at least act like I'm crying you are the Bruce Jenner of podcasts with the Gretchen Rossi and the Gretchen Rossi the Taylor Armstrong of podcasts oh okay well that is a great segue Ben

and why don't you talk right now so people can see you this is my Taylor Armstrong impersonation okay so there was also um was did it come out this week that taylor armstrong uh got married to that lawyer guy i did not know that that whatsoever actually tell me inform me i feel like i read it somewhere but i really didn't care enough to fully investigate it but i think taylor maybe officially is married or oh no i think she's officially engaged oh to a lawyer man who kind of looks a little bit like uh yolanda's husband david foster he's a little older a little salt and peppery and he loves to wear a white linen pant i thought

you were gonna say he kind of looks like yolanda which which would have been amazing because it would have been it would have meant that she had to have been marrying a magician. Because any man who looks like Yolanda basically looks like he's on the Vegas strip. He basically looks like one of the – Siegfried or Roy, one of them. Preferably not the one eaten by the tiger. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. I mean if you ever think – I never actually thought about that. But Yolanda is – she does actually look exactly like a Vegas entertainer, a male Vegas entertainer.

Beautiful as a woman but very wrong as a man. Do you think that she would arrive on stage in a big, huge glass, amazing see-through refrigerator? That would be her unveiling. She would hand out complimentary lemons to everyone in the audience. Oh my god, what is wrong with us? So Taylor's engaged. You know what? I hate Taylor right now because... What do you mean right now?

Well, I don't hate Taylor as much as everyone else does usually, but I'm hating her right now because I hate this whole thing of, you know, a woman, like her husband in this case, tragically kills himself. And like, give yourself some time. Like, have some alone time. Don't just jump into the next relationship. Vicky Gunvalson and Gretchen Rossi and now Taylor Armstrong.

I hate that. I hate when women jump into the next relationship, and then they wonder why their cycle of whatever it is doesn't break. Do you think that that is a sign of weakness? I mean, this happens to men and women, but people that cannot be single cannot be alone. I just think that, like, guess what? Everyone's going to die eventually, but you need to learn how to be alone at some point. I do think so. I mean, the flip side is you can say you're in a

terrible relationship and then a Prince Charming comes along and takes you out of it. And why would you turn that away? So I get that, too. But sometimes I think I don't have a feeling that this is Prince Charming sweeping Taylor off her feet. I think it's called she still has debt and she needs to marry somebody with money. Yeah, exactly. Well, Prince Charming has a lot of money. Prince Charming has a lot of money. He's not a prince for nothing. He's not like Prince Van Anholt.

He's got money. He can back it up. He can back it up on like Anholt. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. He's got a lot of offshore accounts. Do you think any of this might have to do with the fact that taylor was probably not um i mean i don't know beverly hills uh the real housewives of beverly hills has already been shooting i mean they're probably

even close to wrapping production on the upcoming season but um do you think this was a a play on taylor's part to be more involved this season i don't even know officially if she is a friend of the housewives or if she's a full on cast member this year. I, yeah, I don't know. I wouldn't be surprised if it was a, if it was a publicity stunt,

because now all these housewives have become savvy to the fact that if you have anything approaching an engagement, you're going to get an, a season long arc. And by the way, we all hate, we hate as the viewers, I'm going to say we hate the engagement arcs we hate the

wedding arcs i'm so done with them if we wanted to watch that we'd watch we this is bravo we want to see cattiness no one cares about the fairy tale weddings right show puts on exactly i mean ben makes a very good point here um i haven't even seen the nini spinoff or the tamra spinoff yet and i can already tell you, I don't want to see them. I will, I will watch them for this podcast, but I am not looking forward to them. I think it's completely ridiculous more so than ever. You know, we already know that these shows are fabricated, but these wedding spinoffs are incredibly fake. And I just, you know, I just want to watch dinner parties. I just want to watch fights at dinner parties.

Yeah. Why is there not a Bravo show? That's just solely about catty dinner dinner parties. I just want to watch fights at dinner parties. Yeah, why is there not a Bravo show that's just solely about catty dinner parties? Or just a travel show. How about a show? And Below Deck, I guess, sort of gets it sort of right. Wait, are you suggesting that Below Deck is a travel show? Well, in that they're in a confined space. But if you think about it, the best Housewives episodes are when the cast is stuck together, they can't go anywhere, and they they are traveling and they're stressed out so we need to have a travel

show and or dinner party show and that's that would be good tv right there i think that there should be a show and you know we're probably you know somebody's going to come out with this next week but there should be a dinner party show where inappropriate topics are put into a bowl, and you are locked in the room for five hours with alcohol, and you are forced to talk about the inappropriate topics. It's like drunk history except with reality stars. Drunk, dumb history. Have the reality stars say what happened in the situation. I'm going to pitch that reality show. I'm going to say,

drunk history is where they take an expert, get them really drunk, and have them explain the history and it's acted out. My version is going to be a dumb history version where someone does not know what happened and it gets acted out.

Who? My words. Well, I'm nervous because Bravo very well could greenlight that. Yeah, I would actually watch that. By the way, Steve Miller. Oh, yeah, go ahead. I was going to say just about Below Deck.

I noticed that there was a commercial for a Below Deck reunion. Did you see, however, that it is not a full-on proper reunion? It's going to take place on an episode of Watch What Happens with Andy Cohen. Yeah, no, it's not a full-on reunion. But you know what, though? It's a hell of a lot more than Princesses got. So that's bad news on the Princesses front. It is bad news on the Princesses front.

But for those Below Deck fans out there, you should be happy. I posted this on our Facebook page recently. If you're now watching us live, you can go to our Facebook page and see this. But if you're listening on the podcast a day later, you can go back and check it out. But Bravo just officially renewed Below Deck for a second season today. I'm very excited. The funny thing, though, is for a second, back to what Ben was just mentioning about the reunions. I don't think that Bravo thought that Vanderpump Rules or Below Deck would be hits at all.

I thought that they just thought that they would burn them off. And I feel like the Vanderpump Rules reunion was thrown together very haphazardly at the last second, and they milked it for two episodes. And now Below Deck, which is scoring ratings that are equivalent to Vanderpump Rules, just a little bit below 2 million viewers per episode, now they're throwing the entire cast on Watch What Happens with Andy Cohen. And again, this means a good thing for Below Deck, but when we don't see

the princesses on Watch What Happens, I think that that means no reunion, no next season. At this point. For any of the shows, to be honest. Is it true that they're recasting Below Deck? There's a lot of rumors swirling out there.

You know, I'm fine if they recast some of it except for captain lee captain lee is staying well here's the problem captain lee is boring and just like no no no no captain lee is the best because he is what i love in a reality show a crusty old person who yells at the idiots who are much younger than he is that's the perfect um description for vicky Gunvalson, a crusty old person who yells at the people that are much younger than himself or herself. Yes, and I feel like you were setting up a segue, but I just wanted, before I

honor your segue... No, I actually wasn't planning on it as a segue. I'm not done talking about Below Deck. Oh, okay. No, I was going to say, my favorite thing in reality TV is when old people yell at young people. It was great on Big Brother when we had Jerry and Rennie. And it was great on this little gem of an MTV show called The Girls of Hedster Hall, where they put these bad girl club girls in a British boarding school

and had old, fat British school moms yell at them all day long. It was just the best. It's like what you always want happens, like your dream coming true. And that's what I like about Captain Lee. He makes my dream come true. He is a dream. I think that we would all agree that a few of the crazies on that show, you know, the drunk idiots, they make for good TV. But there are plenty of drunk idiots out in the world that we could, you know, have fill their shoes.

And I know a few of you mentioned this on the Facebook page, and I wholeheartedly agree. If they are going to recast, could they please get some hot dudes? I agree. I think the one who was supposed to be really hot was CJ, and his face looks like it's come straight from the leather factory. I mean, this guy has seen a lot of sunshine in his time. Decent body, but, man, he is— I'm a sun worshiper, and I know that this is all going to go to hell. Oh, wait, it already did go to hell.

But yeah, I could not make it on that show. But we could use some hotter bodies. The other thing is, though. Better hair. That guy, Alex. I know. But the problem is the captain wants all the people to keep their shirts on because that keeps it classy. But I'm like, if this is reality TV, let's just take off the pants too. No, I like the degree to which we see them taking out their

shirts because you never know what's going to happen. You get a little peek here and there. I think that's, I think that's scintillating, but I agree. We need some, we need some better, um, we need, we need some better faces. I think you have, it's good to have some like ugly faces in there too. I think those are always fun because the ugly people are always the most interesting and hilarious. But we could get some better bodies. Although, you know what? I actually did like that Eddie guy. There's something about him I found very attractive.

Wow. Yeah, shocking, right? What ugly people in Bravo history do you find interesting? You just said that the uglier people tend to be the more interesting ones. find interesting? You just said that the uglier people tend to be the more interesting ones, and I'm curious to know who from Bravo's vaults do you find interesting that was maybe not as pretty

as some of their cast members or castmates? Okay. I would say the ones that I've enjoyed who've been less aesthetically blessed. Amy from Gallery Girls. Amazing. The blonde one on Below Deck, the drunk drunkard she's also hilarious

um let's just call her let's just call her amy from gallery girls yeah yeah exactly she is basically amy from gallery girls i don't know if this counts i don't know if mama elsa counts because when they get old enough and they get ugly it doesn't really matter wait are you suggesting that she gets a free pass on that plastic surgery just because she's an old lady? No. Because I think she does. I think she gets a free pass. But she's interesting because she's old, not because she's ugly.

You know what? I'm drawing a blank, but I will say – I will go jump over to MTV, and I'll say the entire cast of Sorority Life, seasons one through three, were always the ugliest girls, and they were hilarious to watch because they have so many insecurities you know and so they take it out season two of sorority life tv gold tv gold oh my goodness especially because it like dovetailed with season one of fraternity life oh yeah oh oh ready here's this matt someone from my high school was on fraternity life season one he went to sydney buffalo mike rice oh well i'm sure he wasn't in the same frat that you and i were in which shocker to those of you listening and are watching right now ben and i were both frat boys gasp yep and we were in the same frat yep we were both together um you weren't supposed to you weren't supposed to reveal that on the podcast but yes Secret handshake, oh wait I don't know it anymore

I remember it but I'm not going to show it because there are some secrets that are meant to be kept Anyway, so sorority girls had a bunch of ugly girls and remember when that one girl slapped, remember that girl Sylvia slapped the other girl? Oh yes

Great times BuzzFeed should really do a list about the amazingness of sorority life Remember that girl Sylvia, Sloppy Other Girl? Oh, yes. This is great. Great, great times. BuzzFeed should really do a list about the amazingness of sorority life and fraternity life on MTV. Well, you know what? Here's some insider scoop. Those shows would probably still be around if those idiots at Santa Cruz didn't kill an 80-year-old koi fish and create a national debacle. Stern, I know. Do you remember that?

And that's, you know, it's too much liability for MTV, and they already had a hard enough time dealing with the college campuses. So that killed the show, which is too bad, because that was another gem. Sorority life, fraternity life, Girls of Hetzel Hall, Gallery Girls, and probably soon-to-be princesses, these are all gems, people. These are forgotten, hidden gems. Nothing is bad. I know we're totally sidetracking here i know somebody posted this for our short podcast um what was the uh the show with ally hill figure oh it's like rich girls right that one that was the best that was the best show ever really i did not i did not i did not feel gem like about that one. Didn't give me

gemmy feelings. You are wrong. You are wrong. But now we're thinking about gem in the holograms and we should probably get to the real housewives of orange County because the other night we had the third installment of the reunion and as expected, it was explosive. Um, I'm sure a lot of you that are watching, um, our podcast right now and watch the show have many opinions. Thank you for sharing them on our Facebook page. But Ben, what are your main takeaways? Wow. That Brooks is such a scumbag. I didn't even realize how much of a scumbag he was.

Actually, my big takeaway was this. I really need to know what goes on in the Bellino household. I want to know how quirkiness is hey catch this do you remember that i can't before we even get into the brooks and vicky we have to talk about alexis let's yeah let's talk about everybody and then we'll end with vicky and brooks but um alexis bolino saying that fun times with her husband uh um revolve around playing catch with a good and plenty. Andy Cohen, who we're not the biggest fan of, but Andy Cohen almost lost his shit. He thought it was the funniest thing ever.

And I agree. I had the distinct pleasure of watching the show last night with our friend Michelle Collins, who is possibly the funniest woman alive. And to see Alexis Bellino... Funnier than Alexis Bellino? I should say intentionally funny and seeing alexis bolino say certain things and then hearing michelle's reactions was just like i was like

in heaven especially when when alexis said you know last you know jim always does all these great things but they all get left on the chopping room floor they do they do because they have a chopping room in their mansion that they can't afford they they have a little abattoir you know where they uh take care of some veal um but then i love when she's like you know people don't realize you know jim is like really fun and spontaneous like so he's like here catch this i'm like what did she say did she describe him as quirky she actually said quirky like he Yeah, she said quirky. He's like fun and quirky. I just like that her example of him being quirky is basically him treating her sort of like a dog.

Right. I mean, he was telling her to fetch candies that probably rolled off his gut when he was watching TV. They all have little bits of hair trapped on them, sort of stuck. Yeah, five-second rule. Don't worry about it. Yeah, yeah. It's the Bellino five seconds. That was, to me, one of the funniest moments of the reunion.

And then? We started off the show, though, with I think we talked about Heather and her husband's marital woes airing on TV, which, I mean, to be honest with you, I felt like that was one of the most staged arcs for the entire season, which, you know, that's a bold statement coming out of Orange County where everything feels staged.

But when Heather's marital problems feel staged, you know, I just, I don't buy it. I don't buy her. And I don't really fucking care about them. You know, her whole little clip package just sort of underscored the fact that she is so dour and humorless. I mean, just, Terry's a good guy.

And the fact that when they brought up the onion ring situation, and she's like that. She can't let it go. She's like, she's like, look, you know, like I, you know, I was doing a lot and why he couldn't be like, you know what? I'll have onion rings next week. How about Borgo the other way?

Be like, all right, so put an onion ring in there. She wasn't doing a lot. She was dealing with the caterer. She could have just told the caterer, you know what? Okay, add some onion rings. That's all she had to do. Right. She's making it sound like she was slaving away in the kitchen.

And the reality is she has a staff of 5 000 people yeah um and by the way whoever submitted the question to bravo and i don't even know how people do submit questions for how great was well they make it up clearly but it was a great question so why don't you tell everybody the question that was like why won't you let the man uh have an onion ring when he's probably when he's the one paying for the party in the first place well ben um they have a really strong partnership and she brings fabulosity to his life while he brings home the money that was pretty much her response yeah and no and then she was like well they have a partnership she's like i bought the lot and and terry bought the building of you know for their house it It's a partnership.

She's like, she's like, I pay for things just as much as he does. And that's just so it's just so insulting to say that he's the sole provider. She's like, I had a very successful I had a very successful television career before I ever met before I ever met Terry. I'm like, what? What was this? Your big band career? Was this your your stand up comedy career? Was this your singing career? What was this? Your stint on the the quickly uh the swiftly um uh uh canceled jenny mccarthy program really really is she gonna really hang her hat on this shit because she's not getting anywhere with anybody with this i mean and the fact that her career like that was kind of promising so long ago like i'm sorry but we don't know your

career we don't recognize you from tv you are now officially a reality tv trash bag so just commit yeah i mean last time i checked i i feel like your starring turn in this failed cbs sitcom that's life never quite made it to syndication i'm sorry i don't know if that starring turn was enough to really build the chateau in orange county i mean heather dubrow is not even famous enough to be asked to join the Sharknado sequel. I mean, Tara Reid has top billing over Heather Dubrow. So just know your role, honey. Just figure it out and accept it.

Well, I mean, why would she ever do Sharknado when she's practically a cast member of Malibu Country? You know, the soon-to-be Emmy-nominated Malibu Country. Right. You're forgetting that Sharknado is more popular than Reba McIntyre. So that was funny. It's always fun to get a dose of Heather being self-serving and self-important. Well, let's get on to the main the main well no no before we get to vicky brianna and all that craziness let's talk tamra for a second so um andy pretty much had to promote um her upcoming wedding special so we talked about that briefly and we found out that um tammy sue v who then became tamra bar, is now officially Tamara Judge, which we did know.

And we also found out that Eddie has not been making love to his bicycle as much, and he's been busy riding Tamara, which made me throw up in my mouth a little. Yeah, you saw what just happened to me right here. I just nearly threw up in my mouth. It's like my lungs seized up. First of all, I want Eddie to shave his beard. I understand that right now I've got a little bit of scruff going on here, and that's pure laziness.

I don't actually think this looks good, okay? Are you calling me lazy? Yours looks good because yours can fill in. I get like a giant depth thing. But Eddie cannot grow a full beard properly, and it looks hideous. Why he has that beard on, and I'm not talking about Tamara, ha-ha, is beyond me. Second of of all when she's like oh now i'm tamra judge i'm so glad to get rid of the barney why didn't you get rid of it beforehand

you know you can do that tamra just a little little thing that annoyed me and also the thing of tamra being called tamra judge i just would never want to use the word judge and tamra in the same phrase let alone the same name and that really especially really, especially when she's listed alphabetically, and she's going to be referred to as Judge Tamara, that makes me very scared. As much as I hate Tamara, and she's probably my least favorite housewife in history,

Judge Tamara, I could see her taking over when Judge Judy finally retires. I would watch that. I would love to watch Judge Tamara, actually. She would just probably kick everyone out of her courtroom. Out of my courtroom! She'd just take them by their chair.

Enough! Enough! And then under her... What do judges wear? What is that thing called? That cape? I believe it's called a robe. She could wear a cape. She could wear a cape left, in fact. She could wear a cape lit and a... That's not what she would wear. She would probably wear a sports bra and a cape lit.

I was going to say, with a cut fitness, big C, a CF on the back. Yeah, she wouldn't be on the bench. She'd actually be on some strange Pilates machine doing some weird lengthening thing while she hears the cases. And then she starts to – and actually she'd take every case and make it about her. while she hears the cases. And actually, she'd take every case and make it about her. So, like, you know, like, Your Honor, I came here because my neighbor's dog chewed up the tire

of my car. She's like, well, it reminds me of a car that I had. It was a car that I lost my virginity in, and then I subsequently tried to commit suicide. It was a very difficult time for me. I am found guilty. You are a terrible person. Clearly, Tamara would have a lot of cases

that involved uh dog leashes being thrown at her which she accuses but um i'm just gonna put this out there she deserves to have many many a leash thrown at her head because she is horrible um i she could have anything thrown at her really as long as it's not life-threatening that's true that's true um so tamra kind of was boring this episode. I mean, it really wasn't about her. It was really about how pathetic Vicki Gunvalson is, which I have to say, by the end of this episode, I mean, it's really strange because, you know, we don't have, you know, a lot of family issues on some of the programs that are true and meaningful. I mean, with Jersey, obviously that cuts really deep,

but I felt like last night on the reunion part three, Vicky stood up and was like walking off the stage because this was hitting a little too close to home for her, which means I loved it even more. And literally hitting too close to home. Brianna revealed that she was the daughter of, she suffered abuse as a child. But what does that mean? Is that with her true biological father, Vicky's first husband? I cannot imagine that would be Don. I don't think it's Don, but you know what, though?

I mean, it just shows why she likes this Ryan asshole. This guy is clearly going to beat up Brianna. I'm sorry, I know that might sound libelous, but he clearly will. He's a hothead. He's crazy. He's nuts. And on top of that, throw in some PTSD. This is not going to be a good situation for her. But you know why she's drawn to him? Because that's what she

knows. Sorry. It doesn't take a genius just to see how that worked out. You know, I am getting to the point where I can no longer defend Brianna. I have loved her from the get-go. I love that she's part of this show. I don't want her to go anywhere because clearly she makes for good TV, and the mother-daughter dynamic is just fucked up and amazing.

But I will say I had a serious problem with her on the reunion. You know, I like that she attacks Brooks, and we'll get there in a second. I have a serious problem with her defending her husband with regards to the situation with Lydia's mother. You guys know that I'm not Lydia's biggest fan by any means, but I love Lydia's mother, and I think that the way he acted was repulsive. the producers of the reunion didn't put Ryan on enough of a blast because I really wanted them to replay the tapes again and again, showing that Ryan truly was out of line with regards to Lydia's mom and who cares? Okay. Maybe this woman put her feet up on Vicki's couch. Maybe she put some mud there. Guess what? Lydia can write you a check for a cleaning crew to come in and wipe down your sofa and, you know, have your carpets cleaned. If it really is that bad, the way the way he acted was disgusting i'm still not over it but i have a serious problem with brianna not saying you know what i'm sorry she needed to apologize on behalf of her husband i don't give

a shit that he is in afghanistan i appreciate i appreciate what our military does for us that does not excuse him from acting like an asshole and for her not apologizing i agree 100 matt i think that um for her the night of the party to defend her husband they sort of mentioned this on the reunion you know i kind of get that i still think it was wrong but now that there's been some time she that's passed she can look at the tape she should she should have been more contrite and instead her response was ever since i was a little girl you're not allowed to have anything out of place in my mother's house at all and the fact that she started to go on that path and start to say well he was defending the house

as if this house were something special and again as we've mentioned i don't think any house that has a caliente sign and lots of rooster art is worth defending. Not special. Not special. I think that actually Lydia's mom probably improved it by getting red wine stains and mud on the couch, okay? I think pretty much anything from Ashley Furniture, which we can all safely assume is where her furnishings came from, could use a little red wine and mud to improve them. Or Jennifer convertibles. Yes. Yes, exactly. Or Jennifer convertibles.

Yes, exactly. But the point is this, though. For her to defend Ryan like that and to say, well, to cast him in a light as if he was almost being heroic. Like he, being the gentleman that he is, was defending his mother-in-law's house. You know, like he was protecting these furnishings from the mud. He was just doing what he had to do, and he was stressed. It was extremely repulsive to me. To me, it showed someone who is making excuses, and they all sort of said that, but it was awful. It was actually an entire night of those women making excuses for their husbands or men, and it was sad.

You made a good point there. You were suggesting that, you know, a lot of time has gone past and clearly Brianna has watched these episodes air. And so she should be able to process that and then apologize. And the funny thing is she's kind of a hypocrite, shocker, because all she wants is Vicky to listen to the recording of Brooks and Ryan's conversation and process that and really move forward and figure out how she wants to deal with it but brianna can't even watch the show and realize that her husband was an awful asshole and also brianna had a real bitchy moment too when when i think i forget

what the question was but something like you know in retrospect what do you think and she goes well all i know is that I was up late at night with a bucket of water, scrubbing out red wine and mud from that couch. And that was a real bitchy statement. And I got to tell you right now, do you have, you have to admit Ben that like, don't you think that like her fan fans of Brianna just probably are like done? Like, I feel like she lost them all last night. Yeah. Especially because we all know you don't get red wine out with water. Sorry.

I mean, that's just basic knowledge, Brianna. You're never going to keep a man with those sort of housekeeping skills. And I love that. Didn't somebody ask her, like, well, are you still living there? Yeah, she is. Of course she is. And I like that Lydia stood up and was like, wait a second, okay? Like, I respected when you said I don't want to talk about ryan because he's overseas and stresses me out she's like i respected that but then all of a sudden it's not okay like you're allowed you're allowed to talk about my mother and

then i was like i wasn't saying it was your mother i wasn't saying it was your mother it was like once again it was returned to the vicky school of like strict interpretation like you you there's no you're not allowed to to imply that it was anyone else she didn't say it was your mother actually more more the laurie waring i'm sorry it was the laurie waring no no no you know you're all do that you're correct there because the sad thing for me is i can't believe that i'm like saying the sad thing because we're talking about the housewives what is wrong with me um what i'm getting at is um when i was watching the show, I really just saw Brianna becoming Vicky. And I always thought that she had her head on her shoulders screwed on properly, that she probably had enough influence from Don, who I loved, and from her brother, who seems like a normal person, to not go down Vicky's

crazy path. And she is clearly a product of living in that house with Vicky for so long. She's still there. And I think that she sees Vicky's behavior now as acceptable. She doesn't approve of Vicky's relationship with Brooks, but everything else horrible about Vicky, Brianna has inherited. Absolutely. So let's talk about Brooks. So they were talking about Brooks. Brianna was talking about all the vile things that Brooks had said, and Vicky was getting mad. Brooks makes a grand entrance that was like some, like, it reminded me of the Cosby show. Someone just comes waltzing down the staircase out of nowhere. I know.

Didn't you want them to do, like, that routine that the Cosby family did, where they're all, like, lip syncing? Yeah, I know. I want to see some sort of dance and, you know, get some music going on there. With some broody getting all, wah! Let's get some Tempest Bledsoe up in the mix. Actually, that's another good reality show. Put the former cast members of the Cosby show, put them all in a house, and see how they are now.

See how they all exist. Except Eldon. He was so boring. Yeah, put him in there. You never know. You never know what might come out. He might be the craziest of all. And especially now that Raven-Symoné's a lesbian, that can make for some real interesting things. I want them to cast Raven-Symoné on the Real House of Atlanta. That would be amazing.

Is that where she's living these days? Who cares? Who cares? She's blasting down there. Fly her in. She's a raven. She can fly in herself. I know.

That's so raven. So raven. So I love how Brooks had this entrance that was right out of an 80s sitcom. Out of an 80s sitcom and he joins. I thought it was very like Falcon crest. Like I'm going to, I'm going to saunter down a staircase. It was a little nurse Nan also nurse Nan from soap dish,

which I think we referenced last week. We love soap dish on this podcast. For those of you just tuning in right now, we love soap dish. Yeah. If ever you are like, when is the next podcast going to be just watch soap dish? this podcast. For those of you just tuning in right now, we love soap dish. Yeah. If ever you are like, Oh, when is the next podcast going to be just watch soap dish? It's going to,

it's pretty much the same thing. Um, yeah. So he had this big, elegant entrance. All that was missing was a ball gown, quite frankly. And,

um, and then he's like, and Andy's like, Oh, were you listening to all this? He's like, no, I wasn't listening at all.

I was like, shut up Brooks. You, of course you're listening. Like what else would you be doing applying more just for men highlights to your hair he was probably um like texting some 19 year old strippers and eating some crawfish yeah the crawfish sounds so good right now um so anyway he comes down and then he has this slick politician apology sort of thing right where he's sort of like i just want to say

that brianna you uh you may have seen an email in 2007 that said that i told my your mother that i loved her and i understand that was very difficult for you to read. And Brianna's like, no, that wasn't the problem at all. She's like, the problem is that you left a nasty voicemail on my husband's phone. And Brooke's like, there's nothing I've said that I'm not sorry for. And then she's like, well, what about saying that you want my husband to beat me? He's like, well, I'm sorry for that. I'm sorry for that. I mean, it's just like so slick and gross and awful he is he

is repulsive i do um the women uh vicky's cast member or cast mates on the show were repulsed like you could see tamra like inching away from him on the couch um and they would just you know point the camera at gretchen and at heather and they were shocked. And Lydia actually was so upset that she teared up and had to walk off the stage. Yeah. What I don't understand, I don't understand. He kept on saying, well, that voicemail was taken out of context or whatever.

Like, in what context is it acceptable, even drunk, like, to say, you need to start beating your wife. That's what you need to start doing. I start beating your wife that's what you need to start doing i don't know how that works i don't know how that unless it's like a unless it's like a really good joke like a like not not a really good joke but like it's a real like you guys are just joking back and forth the way we joke you know but i don't think bricks was doing that no i actually think that he um i don't know he's just he's the way we joke about how how men should beat their lives you know that's like hilarious right oh well we've said a hell of a lot worse than that

on this podcast feel free to go back to our 90s 90 previous episodes and you will hear lots of horrible things yeah exactly so here's here's one of the other things like Brianna mentioned that this voicemail exists on Ryan's phone and you know Vicky reminds me a lot of many mothers out there who need to sweep things under the rugs when um you know things get too real and Vicky is still for the life of her she's defending Brooks and she's so concerned about him getting vilified on the show as if that hasn't been happening for the past two seasons. And she won't listen to the voicemail because – and I think Heather made a good point, surprisingly. Yes, she did. It sounds like Vicky can't listen to that voicemail because then that will really have to solidify the need to remove Brooks from her life.

And she's so pathetic that she needs a man in her life. She probably doesn't – she's not capable of getting rid of brooks even though he made such nasty um you know claims and suggestions towards her own daughter how can you how could you how could you choose anybody over your own flesh and blood i don't i don't i don't understand like i Like, if I were dating someone and they said that about my daughter, I would just – you just can't do that. You absolutely cannot stand that relationship. I mean – and he is such a scumbag, and you can see the hate in his eyes. I'm sorry. And you could see –

He wanted to leap over to the other couch and punch Brianna's face in. Oh, my goodness. Oh, he was doing everything. He did not – he was – to his credit, he was doing everything and he did not he was to his credit he kept his cool because he knew he had to but he want oh man you could tell he wanted to yell he wanted to tell all those women to get back into the kitchen and he was more than happy to uh just to step out of that situation and be like peace out vicky yeah but instead of saying, peace out, Vicky, and Brianna, I want to punch you, he goes, yeah, I'm willing to walk away. I'm willing to let the love of my life go for the sake of their family. To make him seem like he's some sort of hero.

Brianna's not a hero, Vicky's not a hero. And to be honest with you, you know, Brianna kept saying, you know, at the end of the episode that, you know, that's my mom. I still love her. I still support her. If my mother chose a horrible boyfriend who suggested that I be beaten by my husband over me, if I were Brianna, I would not have a relationship with Vicky. And I understand that that would mean she'd have to move out of Cotto da Casa and a cushy lifestyle. But I'm sorry, I would rather eat ramen noodles and live in a shitty apartment

than have a mother who disrespected me that openly and disgustingly. Yeah, you know, before this voicemail came around, I was one of many people, I think, who were like, you know what, Brianna? Like, Brooke sucks, but get over it it's your mom's life like you have to like you have to lighten up but then once you hear this voicemail

to hear what he had said about changes everything changes everything i mean brianna still has been ruined by ryan don't get me wrong brianna is totally ruined and over and done and now falls in the category with everyone else as being hopeless and dumb. But now I'm on her side about the Brooks thing, that's for sure. And I actually agreed with Heather on another point, which was that she told Vicky, you can fall in love with anyone, but you've got to make sure that that person is appropriate for you. And obviously Brooks is not. And it is shocking how Vicky comes to his defense and then doesn't understand that she hasn't broken her own cycle

of being with guys who treat her bad and she's in an abusive situation. Okay, but here's the thing. I mean, again, we're not part of the inner workings of these relationships. It seems that she and Don had an open relationship, but Don, I don't think ever Don came across as like a horrible husband. Um, I think that Don checked out because Vicky was a workaholic and all he wanted to do was go on vacation with Vicky, but she needs to sell insurance the entire time when clearly they could afford to go on vacation and just hang out. So I don't like her saying that I've had like

all these bad men in my life. The thing is with, for me, it's like, she's a 51 year old woman and she is so pathetic. And I just, I feel bad for her, but I'm also just like, when you're that pathetic, I don't even know, like, I don't even know what to do, Ben. I don't even know how to feel. I'm just like, it's just gross. Well, that's how you should feel gross because that's what these women really are. They're just gross, gross old ladies doing awful things to themselves and their children. That's what it should be renamed. The real gross old ladies doing nasty things to themselves and their children of Orange County.

That should be Vicky's opening line in the opening credits next season. I'm just a gross old woman who's horrible to myself and my children, but I'm still here, damn it. Yeah. I'm not only gross to myself. I'm gross to my children, too. Do you think that... Okay, well now, I mean, did they say that we're going to get a lost footage episode next week, or are we done? Yeah, we are. Okay, so we're going to get lost footage next week, and we'll probably briefly touch on that, but O.C., overall, how did you feel about

the season? I still love these women. Great season. Great season. I've always loved OC, to be honest. This season had that intangible it factor where you cared about everything. It was nice to see OC back hitting its stride again after a few seasons that were not so great. Do you think that we're giving OC a little bit more credit than we should just because Jersey is so awful right now or not? I feel like I would still be high on the OC horse regardless of the counter programming or the other housewives.

Absolutely. Absolutely. And by the way, before we move on to Miami, we have to also talk about actually one of my favorite moments of the episode which is vicky through the through this all she manages to have a beautifully past aggressive moment when she talks about like slade and she's like you know like i understand gretchen now you know the world just hates slade everyone in the world just hates slade so much get another digging on gretchen while you can she's like well i don't know if the whole world hates Slade so much. Get another dig in on Gretchen while you can.

She's like, well, I don't know if the whole world hates him. And she's like, no, no, the world just hates him, just despises him. But you stood by him, so that was really good. By the way, Vicky's right, too, by the way. Everyone hates Slade. Yeah, but Gretchen is – I'm tired of Gretchen being the punching bag. Vicky is the worst. She just is the worst. Yeah.

You know what I love about this show? Just when you think you know who the worst is, it always changes. They flip the script. Do you think that Vicky will be back next season? I love that she gets back. Yes, of course. I'm done. I'm done.

I'm done. But I think that Vicky, at the end of the day, is obsessed with the fact that she is the first housewife and the lasting housewife from the first franchise. And I don't think she's ever going to let that go. No. Oh, yeah, absolutely. Plus, she's got to sell a bunch of those bloody piggies. So we're going to be seeing a lot of Vicky next year with a lot of bloody piggy swag all over her shirts and stuff, sort of like the BLK brand. Why don't we move on to Miami?

Yeah, let's talk Miami brand um why don't we move on to miami yeah let's talk miami because i really don't know i there's nothing i want to say about jersey except that it sucks yeah well we'll talk about jersey after miami but um uh so miami was another good episode i mean miami is so much better than people realize it's i know you guys if you're listening to our podcast right now or watching this videocast, please start paying attention to Miami if you're not paying attention. The ratings are not great. I am already concerned about

a fourth season here, but this show is fun. The characters are great, and it's so much better than Jersey that pulls in more than double the ratings. I don't understand why you'd pick Jersey over Miami. I don't get it. I think actually Bravo should have cast

like a new character this season. It should have been like a real, real Latina girl. Like they need to get that Latina audience in there, you know, to boost the ratings. Like that girl, Melissa from Real World Miami. Yeah, exactly. That would have been perfect. That fought with Dan and opened that envelope

and then Dan got so mad and then it was like freak out. Yeah, and then he masturbated in a theater and then there was Flora and she was big like hooker. And then there was Sarah, that lesbian on the skateboard. Or what about Yvette from Big Brother season six? She lives in Miami. Pretty much. I mean, if Bo made it on last season, why couldn't Yvette have made it on there also? Very good point. Or Gloria Estefan.

Obviously. Now, why don't they cast Gloria Estefan? What's wrong with Bravo? Don't they realize they've got the perfect housewife just sitting there? She's not doing anything. The rhythm has gotten her, okay? And she needs to be saved from the rhythm. From Wondery, this is Black History For for Real I'm Francesca Ramsey and I'm Consciously

what do most people think about when they hear the words Black History Rosa Parks Reconstruction MLK February Black History Month exactly exactly there are so many stories of Black history that we just are not really talking about or thinking about, especially outside of February. And we are about to flip the script on all of that. Because on this show, you're going to hear a little less. In August 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue. And a little bit more. She is a heroine to some. As a fighter for Black rights, She is a villain to others.

Follow Black History for Real on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. Listen everywhere on February 5th, or you can listen early and ad-free on Wondery Plus starting January 29th. Join Wondery Plus on the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Black is beautiful. Academy is a new scripted podcast that follows Ava Richards, played by HBO's Industries' Myhala Herald, a brilliant scholarship student who has to quickly adapt to her newfound eat-or-be-eaten world. Ava's ambitions take hold and her small-town values break

in hopes of becoming the first scholarship student to make The List, Bishop Gray's all-coveted academic top ten, curated by the headmaster himself. But after realizing she has no chance at The List on Bishop Grey's all-coveted academic top 10, curated by the headmaster himself. But after realizing she has no chance at The List on her own, she reluctantly accepts an invitation to a secret underground society that pulls the strings on campus life and academic success. If she bends to their will, she'll have everything she's ever dreamed of. But at what cost? Academy takes you into the world of a cutthroat private school where power, money, and sex collide in a game of life and death. Follow Academy on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of Academy early and ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus. I would, you know what I would, you know how quickly I would call her?

1, 2, 3, 4, come on, baby. Get her on. Tell her that you love her. Whatever. I'm mixing up my 1, 2, 3, 4 songs. So we started up again with the Adriana and Leah fight. That was essentially the entire episode. And I feel like that's actually going to be the entire season. We started there.

How did you feel that Leah was coming off this episode? And I feel like that's actually going to be the entire season. We started there. Yes. How did you feel that Leah was coming off this episode? Do you think she was still coming off better than Adriana? You know, I was wavering there a little bit towards the end of the episode. Here's the thing. Like, clearly they were good friends. And I understand that Leah felt stabbed in the back. But at a certain point, you have to let it go.

Like Adriana has made a lot of mistakes in her life and she's probably horrible. I mean, they're probably all horrible, even though we know in real life, Leah is awesome. But, um,

you know, maybe Leah just needs to be a little bit okay with it and realize, okay, fine. She's not going to be my best friend, but I can afford to have helped her in the past. Yeah.

I don't know. I'm going to say this. I also think that, in a weird way, I kind of understand a little bit of what Adriana is saying. Yes, there is the paperwork, but she didn't have the wedding. Yes, okay. I mean, I understood. I feel adriana came off like a little better this

episode or it's not so much that adriana came off a little bit better it's more like leah came off a little worse yes for a part of a part of the episode you know because you do start you know they were they start saying things like you know with leah you know they just were trashing her a little bit you know but. But then towards the end of the episode, the producers were like, now that we've started to make you doubt Leah a little bit, let's just like turn it around and remind you why Leah is actually 100% in the right. Right. And we'll pull out the documents. Yeah. They did an amazing montage starting from season one all the way through the past season of moments when leah was talking to adriana about like oh

when you get married or like how long is this engagement gonna last you know and and adrian was like ha ha well we have to do this we have to go find this and you realize that adriana i'm sorry adriana is full-on lying she's married she went to the courthouse twice wants to get the license wants to get it notarized and as i, every week, I'm sure she clicked the box on her tax returns. She was married. She may not have felt married, but you can't – how do you have your best friend say these things about like, why did I get engaged? And not say things like, well, we're technically married, but we just want to wait to get the salary. I think the answer is when you are crazy and you are a liar, you become a crazy liar who ends up believing your own crazy lies. It snowballs and the untruths become truths.

Exactly. And Adriana only – of that interaction with Leah, she only hears certain things. Adriana only of that interaction with Leah, she only hears certain things. And then she reports back to her women and says, well, well, well, yeah, she says she's she says, like, I did all this for you. I did all this for you. I did like you're not up to my standards, you know, and then the women just think that's what happened. But when you look at the tape, it actually was not like that at all. Leah was like, listen, I want to know what's up because I paid, you know, I paid for this or I got this money together for you. And it was under the pretense that you were single and struggling when in fact you were married and you had someone who could have been a financial

backer for you, you know? And I'm by no means like a huge Mary Saul fan, but I do think that out of this group of women, you know, in addition to Leah, she's somebody who probably does have some you know common sense and business sense and for the life of me i know that she has bad blood and bad history with leah but i don't like to see her aligning herself with adriana who is clearly a crazy liar like mary saul should know better even though she doesn't like leah i agree a hundred percent and as far as alexia i'm still my opinion on alexia has been in flux for a while the first season she was like the nice she was just nice and then the second season she was crazy and attacking karen sierra all the time and this season i'm starting to think you know what i don't know about this alexia i think she

might not be that bright and just the proof is in the pudding look at her older son I'm sorry. I know they went through a trauma of Poor Frankie and his accident, but that kid that kid is a fuck-up I'm sorry Peter the Peter the older son is a total fuck-up, and I don't think it's purely because the trauma He was but in season one he was a fuck-up Maybe part of it is because his dad is a drug lord who went to jail for four years That could have been part of it, but I don't know i question some of alexia's judgments yeah um when you bring a drug lord into the mix i think that that can you know the lines get a little blurry yeah um and also oh my goodness that that song we've heard a lot of bad songs come out of this uh realwives world on Bravo, but Peter's rap song, Ode to His Brother,

not good. What do you think Daniel Staub's daughter would have to say about that? You know, that's a great question, because clearly that little girl would be like, we are sisters. Actually, it would be more like, we are brothers, and we'll fight to the end.

We are brothers, and we'll be your friend. We are brothers, we are brothers, we'll fight to the end we are brothers and be your friend we are brothers we are brothers we are brothers a little flourish for you guys um that was beautiful it's much better than peter's song well yeah but really what isn't

so miley cyrus at the vmas was uh was better than that. Yeah. At least Miley Cyrus does not have a big musical note tattooed on her tricep. She has a lot of bad tattoos, but she does not have that. She does not have that. Or her mother's name fully spelled out with a bouquet of roses. With a bouquet of roses.

Which she believes is unconsciously a reference to his last name, Rosario, the roses. I don't know. There's a lot of weird things going on with that family, and I don't know if they're going to be resolved anytime soon. No, but I think that you made a good point there. I don't know. We want to like her, but she's not doing us any favors. She's not doing herself any favors by trying to get us on board with her crazy, dumbass kid and the way that she's backing up the wrong people, I think, the people that are in the wrong this season. I want to like her, and I feel bad for her, but she's not doing it the right way.

Why did she build her son a recording studio okay that really bothered me because her son is acting out like he punched a homeless guy in the nuts and put it on youtube he's an idiot okay so now he announces that he wants to be a musician so she builds him a recording studio horrible people get rewarded all the time this is why he's messed up he's a spoiled brat I mean, remember he was going out like until 4 in the morning, going to clubs when he was still in high school? I mean, this is the problem here, Alexia. This is someone who needs to be reined in.

And if he wants to record music, he should do what everyone else does, which is start in your garage or whatever or do something on a laptop or go to a recording studio. But don't have one built for you because you know in six months he's going to be moving on to something else else like selling puka shells on the boardwalk um i kind of want to do that i know he's living the life let me tell you something i'm purely jealous of this kid peter okay he and i'm also furious because he's so hot and he's destroyed he's he's gone just like he's just thrown it all away he's just gotten chubby and grown stupid hair and getting bad tattoos.

It makes me furious. He had it all. He had it all. Except for brains. Except for brains. But what's your take on these divisions? Let's talk about this and how we're barely into this season, but it's clearly like this team of girls versus this team of girls.

You know, honestly, I really am team Leah because, and it's not just because we've met her or talked with her, I think she's in the right. I think she has a right to be annoyed. And she said, look, if Adriana came to me and said, look, this is what happened, I was in this state, this is what it was, then she would have been fine. But the fact that

Adriana came in and went on the defense slash the attack I can honestly I see why Leah's frustrated because Adriana then is going and talking a lot of shit about Leah and you know I don't I also don't trust Marisol and Alexia

I feel like they gossip about stuff they don't know about you know I hear you I mean Joanna sucks too she really does suck but I don't know about you know now I hear you I mean Joanna sucks too she really does suck but I don't know she doesn't seem to be as sucky this year so then what's your table you mentioned everybody but Lisa Hochstein so what's your take on Lisa you know Lisa sort of like a non-entity, a non-entity with boobs, okay? She just sort of floats around.

She's a quote-unquote peacemaker. That could not have been more of a producer setup. I know, right? She invites both sets of women to the same place and doesn't tell them. Of course, the producers were told to do that. I mean, it's so obvious. She's like, whatever.

I still don't understand why. She needs to eat more. She needs to eat more. Sorry, Lydia. to do that i mean it's so obvious uh she's like whatever i still don't understand why she should she needs to eat more she needs to eat more sorry are you body shaming her just like slating body shaming her i'm telling her to eat a cheeseburger and maybe if she did that she could have a baby sorry that's my that's my like old jewish grandmother medical wisdom for you right there eat the hamburger eat the hamburger and then you'll have a baby. That was a terrible accent. I'm sorry. Is that why I'm not pregnant because I'm a vegetarian?

I think so. I think that's probably why. Note to self. Maybe I should work on that. Yeah, I think you should. Yeah, Lisa, and also her whole thing with her conversation with Lenny when she's like, I can't sleep. Like, you can't sleep because there's a cameraman at the foot of your bed.

That's why you can't sleep. Don't act like that. And you also can't sleep because the person lying in the bed next to you looks like a disfigured, wax-melted human being. You know what? Listen. Maybe if she ate a hamburger, she would sleep. Has she ever heard of food coma? Just eat a hamburger and you'll sleep through everything, including your own pregnancy.

God, hamburgers would make her life so much better. Let me tell you something. Hamburgers can fix a lot of things, okay? A lot, a lot of things. I kind of miss hamburgers. Maybe if Leah had given Adriana a hamburger, she would have disarmed her and they could have had a more pleasant conversation. That's where Leah went wrong. She did not offer a hamburger.

Yeah. Matt is not on board with this. I don't know. He's a vegetarian. The more I think about it, the more I think that if this is going to be what the entire season is about, maybe we shouldn't be telling people to tune into Miami because now that I'm really reflecting back on this past episode, I'm like – I'm kind of over the storyline and this division of the women. I want to see them interacting more. I don't want to see a group of three versus a group of three the entire time. I need them all to get together, and clearly we're going to get plenty of times where they bring them together for parties.

But I don't know, Ben. I just – No i just no no i like it i like the storyline i feel like you know what i like about it it's a feud that feels organic this is like a real fight we know for a fact this is a real issue between these two women and when there's like a real issue like that that separates two women that usually makes a great through line for a season as opposed to like oh you stole my donkey booty video idea you know like that's not like a real through line that was that was a fabricated through line well where do you see the rest of the season going i mean this is clearly in my opinion going to be something that lasts until the bitter end i mean this could even go into next season if they have one. But what else do you want from this season? I mean, I really want, as much as I hate Joanna, I want to see more fighting with her involved.

I want to see Joanna get drunk. I want to see less of her being aroused by Maria Sharapova's grunts. She needs, yeah, she needs more alcohol in her system to make the season better. I'm just going to say it. I prefer her when she is a dangerous alcoholic. We need to see more people getting thrown into pools. We need to see more slapping.

We need to see Romaine Lettuce shirtless. What about Mr. Kramer, Thomas Kramer? Well, we obviously need to see Thomas Kramer. By the way, did you see the ghost in my apartment is back? My door just opened up on its own. Did you see that? Do you need to check behind it to make sure that you're not the secret star of insidious 3 and you don't know it oh that would be a terrible term of events for this podcast i'm possessed guys terrible best that's

where ronnie went i was possessed and i killed him by the way paula jones on facebook says ben is mixing up his songs this This is why we need Ronnie. Paula, you've never spoken true words. Paula will just tell you like it is. Yeah, she'll tell you like it is. She tells it. She's like our own Leah Black. How fun is that?

Emmy McAdams-Burbano says, I was bitching about Miami after the first episode, but I'm satisfied now. I hate how they are forcing nice group on me, but I i can tell it's a ticking time mom and i love it i i agree with her like krupa is so crazy that she's only going to be able to hide that under 40 pounds of makeup for only a few more weeks i mean the beast is within and it's not going to be able to be held back yes um paula jones also says alexis husband was scarface so that's that's fun to know and um apparently there's something going on with uh katherine edmunds husband and they're all lisa pierce is calling for a divorce so there's some some side some side drama is happening what what are you talking about i don't think it's a i don't think

it's a true call for divorce but um it's very fascinating it's much more interesting than what's going on in new jersey these days that's for sure okay do you have anything else to say about miami before we move on to jersey no i i don't have anything let's talk about i want to know what you think about mama elsa well i think it's very sad i mean i hope that she has a recovery because uh she actually usually has a really good perspective on things. Not only is she funny, but she actually does seem to be aware of things. There is some wisdom hiding behind that mask of flesh. There certainly is.

There certainly is under that baseball mitt. So let's go to – speaking of places full of wisdom, let's go to New Jersey and their trip to Arizona. Glamorous, because those people are not allowed to leave the country anymore after the chaos that they stirred up in the Dominican Republic a few years ago. Oh, my goodness. I think one of my favorite images from this week's episode was them arriving at whatever airport it was in Arizona and Joe Giudice stepping out of the airport in a velour jumpsuit with a white with a white wife beater underneath I mean he could not he could not have looked any more like an Italian guido than he did at that moment slash mafioso um he's repulsive and I only expect him I think that that's actually his uniform it's either that or like an ugly

bathing suit with with him shirtless so I will I will gladly take him in a wife beater and a velour track suit over him shirtless at the beach. Yes. Question. What type of vacation does Caroline Manzo actually like? Because every single year she complains. They go to Italy on a beautiful cruise liner and there's walking. This is not my type of vacation. They go to Dominican Republic. This is not my type of vacation. They go camping. this is not my type of vacation they go to dominican republic this is not my type of vacation they go camping this is not my type of vacation now

they're in beautiful arizona this is not my type of vacation what the hell is wrong with this woman is it just an egg salad factory to have a good time is it just dawning on you that she is a miserable miserable woman with zero um she has nothing left in her heart except love for her dumb children. And her husband hates her and really her siblings hate her. Her friends hate her. I mean why does she even bother to leave her house? She should just lock herself in her house and play throw the ham with herself because her family loves to throw ham on each other yes i think her version of a good vacation is walking three feet down the hall

to her son's apartment and saying hello she's like now this is a vacation this is now this is scenery right here these two boys not so much lauren but these two boys right here this is scenery this is better than any grand canyon um yeah she sucks i mean i really i i've hated her since last season and nothing is gonna turn that ship around so the gang they all go to this like new age spa in the middle of the arizona wilderness where they are immediately loud and obnoxious and offending all the hippies. Melissa comes down with... Wait, wait. Do you think that those hippies were paid to be there? Like, are those extras and production assistants in the background?

Let me... No. I'm going to say no, because let me tell you something. 11 years ago, I went to the... What was it? What's the name of the... Like, that crazy... The Biodome. I went to the Biodome.

I took a tour of the Biodome. What? You know the Biodome? Are you a Scientologist? You know, if I was going to be one, the Biodome turned me the other way. But I'm not sure that our tour guide was not a Scientologist

or something else. We went on this tour, and we had this tour guide who was really wonderful. And afterwards, we said, well, thanks thanks for giving this tour of the biodome and everything and she's like it's great thank you and she's like you know and i really believe that you know we're we're approaching the age of aquarius and at that point our souls will leave our body and go up to space and it'll be a wonderful time i was just like huh i just quietly backed away from the biodome and i realized people like that live in arizona and it's true so everything you saw at this resort i believe so you pretty much just talked a lot of shit about arizona right there

or at least the biodome which is in arizona for those of you who don't know the only the only biodome that we care about uh stars polyshore yeah about to say for those of you who are not up on your mid-90s nature experiments the biodome was a project that was built in Arizona um so anyway so wait wait Melissa gets sick Melissa gets sick she has a sore throat which sucks and but she she is not thick enough to be able to because she's been guzzling too much of her husband yeah too much of tarzan um but she certainly is well enough to once again suggest that teresa's behind all these rumors about her being stripper which i mean she's right she's right but shut up already you're trying to be healing you know um so i don't know so they a medium comes in and reads them and at first they're all laughing but then richie starts to cry and that was actually

don't say that that was a nice moment when richie was crying it's the first time we've seen him be emotional like that i thought it was actually very nice for him to say, to talk about his father who died 10 years ago, he'd spent, you know, 15 years every day with him. And that it was so hard for him that he's not been able to watch his wedding video for the past 10 years. Uh,

I thought that was actually a very, um, a very true moment. That's a poignant moment, but that doesn't, um, excuse him from being, from being addicted being a disgusting.

Yeah. From being disgusting and an asshole to his wife. Yeah. I loved I loved Rosie's whatever. It was just like my father with the gentlest angel you ever met. He was the most gentle angel you ever met. She I mean, I don't even know how to describe her. I mean, like bullet bullet in a china shop doesn't do it then kathy's like oh that must be my father because he never responded on his death though but i told him this this and this and he never responded he didn't respond the way i wanted to it's been 10 years but now i realize

he hears me i'm like okay kathy you just pretty much brought everything to that psychic reading yeah like you will be conned by every psychic from here on out well did you believe like the psychic was legit or was the the psychic sitting in the back room watching the Bravo DVDs before they all walked in? She's like, I'm getting a sense that two of you have a fight. One of you once flipped over a table and called someone a prostitution whore. I don't know where I got that sense from. I don't know where I got that sense from.

I don't know. I don't, I don't know where that came to me from. Doesn't, I feel like being a, being a psychic for a reality star who's had four seasons under their belt is a really easy job. Yeah.

I think that that is the dream gig. If you get paid well, because you really don't have to do any research, but watch TV. Yeah, exactly. Um, um, so then after um the psychic then they went and they took a hike and they looked at cacti and then they got to a little place where a woman with like a bunsen burner had them burn up pieces

of paper that had like emotions on them where they said i am giving up uh worry and doubt and fear and then but not stripping but not stripping not not stripping never um and and uh i'm surprised the first thing they didn't give up was their dignity but then again they probably gave that up a long time ago i was gonna say shame and dignity left us years ago yeah those are those are those are burned those were lost in hurricane sandy if they even were still there. Those were washed away with the Jersey Shore off into the Atlantic. So there was some crying, and then Jacqueline and Teresa hugged, and everything seemed okay. And then Teresa said that she didn't want to make things better.

She didn't want to have bad karma, because if you have bad karma it's gonna come back to get either you or your children and then jackson's like what does she mean by that i didn't think it was a dig i actually did not think it was a dig i think it wasn't i don't think it was a dig i think that jacklyn um you know she's incredibly sensitive and i get that she's incredibly sensitive right now but i actually for the first time don't believe believe that Teresa was trying to jab at her. But that's the first time, and the only time. Yeah. By the way, I just want to say that on Facebook,

Danette... What are they saying? What are they saying? She says, I love this show, but I couldn't watch it without hearing Ronnie talk about their slightly wide-set faces. The hairlines and the faces were really bad this week yeah yeah um so that's basically

new jersey in a nutshell what about um no we gotta we gotta talk about theresa and joe here for a second i think somebody posted this on facebook actually um who posted that oh yeah derrick posted this um oh wait by the way that comment that i read i was reading from the wrong thread that comment was from it was Below Deck, but it sort of seems to apply to all the Bravo shows. They all have white faces. They really do on Below Deck, though. But Derek made a point on the Facebook page, which I do believe is true. And you know how cyclical these shows are and the villains and the heroes.

Not that there's really ever a hero on any Bravo show. We don't need another hero. We don't. Cue the music. But is Juicy Joe getting a favorable edit by Bravo this season? Because Derek believes it, and I kind of believe it too now that I think about it. Derek Hazelton? Yeah, I mean, they're kind of like letting him get away with being a bit of like a funny goofball, like to soften up the blow.

I mean, I don't know i think he is getting a slightly more favorable edit because he hasn't called his wife a cunt yet uh behind her back but or on camera or on camera but i think i think actually they're trying to um i don't know i get the sense they're trying to bring some different dimensions to his character but all you have to do is look at him in that velour tracksuit to realize that joji I don't know. I get the sense they're trying to bring some different dimensions to his character. But all you have to do is look at him in that velour tracksuit to realize that Joji Dice is just Joji Dice. And you just have to take him in in all his glory and that's the man right there. He's like a big old jello

mold of a man. Yeah, there's no real dimension when you're the shape of a ball. Yeah. There's no real dimension. Just a lot of texture. And it all feels like crushed velvet. He's very soft. And he can do a mean high kick, that's for sure. Oddly flexible.

Oddly flexible. He's like the Kool-Aid guy. I'm surprised he doesn't burst through more walls. I'm sure he does in that house. That's how he he demolishes homes. He just runs through like the Kool-Aid guy. That's his construction business. What's the Kool-Aid guy?

Is his name Joe Kool-Aid? Is that the name of the Kool-Aid? What's the name of the Kool-Aid pitcher? You know the guy. The Kool-Aid guy. By the way, and what a rude mascot, okay? Crashing through someone's drywall. Who's going to fix that?

Dan Conner. Dan Dan the drywall man dan connor okay i like there's a lot of pop culture going on right here in this circle i know pop culture happening if you guys aren't um up up to par on your roseanne trivia you suck if you're not up to par with your roseanne or your roseanne or your your kool-aid trivia then this is all lost on you, and I'm sorry to say that. Imagine Dan Connors, the Kool-Aid guy, and Jojo Dice all trapped in the biodome together. Now that's a show I would watch. I

am Team John Goodman. I'm Team Biodome and fat people. Fat people in biodomes. That's what I want. I want them to eat each other in the biodome. Next. Next, speaking about eating, why don't we talk about eat, drink, love.

Ben, I feel like a lot of times on this podcast, we get into a new show, and I'm always there going, oh, you guys, this is a piece of shit but i love it please start watching and you guys are always hesitating and before you know we are all obsessed with gallery girls or below deck or vanderpump rules or wait a second wait a second i think ronnie and i were obsessed with gallery girls you know why actually you you never resisted gallery girls ron and i remember we never i never put up a fight you never did what. What happened was Ryan and I watched it together, I think. You were supposed to come over, and then you didn't come over. There was something that happened.

Ryan and I watched it together, and we're like, oh, Matt. And you cheated on me? You cheated on me like Vicky and Dom? And then I left a hostile voicemail and said that someone should beat you up. I said, beat you up. And by the way, I'm i'm sorry for that matt i'm sorry i was drunk it's okay i'm into it i'm totally into it yeah i can tell i can sort of tell pearls clutching so go on with your bad self about your um look i didn't think that i was

even gonna watch eat drink club i thought it was gonna be one of those shows where we'd get on the bus where we'd get on the podcast and you and Ronnie would talk about it and I would pretend to have watched it and then just like faked my way through the entire thing. But I really like it. I like it because I hate everybody. Yeah, you know, I love shows where you can hate everyone. But isn't that the key to success for bravo if you get me

to hate if you get me to hate everybody i'm not talking about like a reality competition show like top chef because that's just like a little bit classy um and an emmy award winner but i'm talking about like the rest of the crap on the on this show or on this channel it's kind of like if i hate the cast i'm in oh absolutely i i love a hateable cast, but they've got to be the right type of hate. They've got to be the sort of hate you can sort of get behind. Right, like Stassi. Like hatred for Stassi is epic, which makes for an amazing television show. So, yeah, I'm on board with this show.

I thought this episode was actually the weakest one so far. We had Weyland. Which is not saying a lot. Not saying a lot. Weyland, you know, here's the thing with Weyland. I go back and forth. You know, she's beautiful, I think, first of all. I think she's gorgeous, too.

She's gorgeous. She seems bright. But she has a little bit of this Sarah Jessica Parker-ness about her that's annoying. Yeah, she's Sarah Jessica Parker meets Kelly Wurstler. I don't know if anybody's met with Kelly Wurstler, but they kind of are. Judge on Top Design Season 1, a former Bravo gem. See, where's Ronnie? I'm sure this would all fly over his head, but hopefully Bravo Fanatics understand the Kelly Wurstler reference.

But Kelly Wurstler meets Sarah Jessica Parker with kind of – Meet Kate Hudson a little. Yeah, and the annoying bits of Kate Hudson. There's like something about her that's very rom-com-y in the worst way. First of all, I can't stand how her laughing and her crying is almost indistinguishable. You can't really tell what she's doing at any given time. She just sort of has this flirty, not really aloofness, but she's a little too cool for school.

And she's like, well, I'm like, do I break my no-chef rule? Maybe I will. I don't know. All these guys keep on coming over here you know and she pulls out her wedding dress by the way that wedding dress hideous i'm sorry okay i am not one of these gays who knows his wedding dresses i think almost all wedding dresses look nice that one was bad she should not be crying over that thing she should be returning it to the david's bridal where she found it that is being rude to david's bridal or davis bridal or whatever it's called um it just

looked really cheap it was and it had like like you could see that was like it was sort of like they had weird panels in the in the in the torso area in the midriff it was like it was it looked like it was trying to be sort of edgy, but it wasn't. It just looked terrible. And I say, Waylon, I say it's a good thing you didn't have to use that wedding dress because it would have looked wrong. And you should get one that fits you because you're a beautiful woman that's appropriate for you. It was the Brooks of wedding dresses, and you need something. You need the George. I would have liked to see um chanel from princesses

tried on because she never met a wedding dress she didn't love to try on oh yeah oh she would go down to like there's like in echo park there's like this store that sells real cheap wedding dresses that are like our borderline quinceanera dresses and perhaps interchangeable and she'll be like this is beautiful i want to put this on right now. Coco Chanel found her wedding dress. I've stunned Matt into silence, by the way. I love a quinceanera dress. That's all I'll say.

There should be a Bravo reality show called Quinceanera Dresses. Yeah. There should be a Bravo show about someone who harvests quinces and has a daughter who's going through quinceanera. It could be called, and her name could be Sarah. Quince for Sarah's quinceanera. That sounds like a really bad Lifetime show starring Sarah Rue. Oh, well, you know, she is just supposed to be the best, according to Heather.

The best. Oh, well, you know, she is just supposed to be the best, according to Heather. The best. So I would also – I would watch, by the way, any show that has to do with the Consigniera on Bravo because, you know, it would be hilarious. I don't even know what to say anymore. I'm here. Wait, Bueller's not here, but Bueller, yes. But we are barely here. So this is, by the way, our short podcast.

We're doing great with our time. Great. So eat, drink, love. So Waylon is Waylon. Brenda is so bitter. Wait, wait, wait. Have you had a phone nut? Did we discuss if you had a phone nut?

Yes, I have. So what's your take on donut? Okay. Merry fuck kill. Donut, phone nut, crow nut. on donut okay marry fuck kill donut phone nut cronut um marry donut fuck cronut kill phone nut by the way i'm not gonna lie i think that's the funniest thing i've ever said good for you matt um i would have to say honestly like uh i i mean i i marry a donut because donuts are just a classic.

They're great. They're so great. Cronut, I had one recently. It was delicious. I loved it. But I didn't see the – One and done. One and done.

One and done. One and done. I only need to have one. Fonut, I had, and I thought it was truly nothing special. I wouldn't kick it out of bed necessarily, but if I had to kill one of them, it would have to be Fonut. I love that you committed to your answers there. I really do appreciate that. Oh, I have very, very strong opinions about the Fonut. Very strong.

Which is that it's solidly okay. Which is not a good thing. It's just like the show itself. So then we have... So let's see, the little girl um jess she did nothing right she did nothing this episode well did i even ask you did you um have you ever eaten at fuku burger i haven't but i once went to an event where fuku burger catered and they put gave these like little sliders and they were not they're only okay but but i would i don't judge the the restaurant that That's just they had bad catering.

Where is Foodie Burger in L.A.? I feel like I've seen the bar. It's on Cahuenga. So is it on Cahuenga, like near the Arclight and between Stout? But that's also where Umami Burger is, right? Or is it up the street? No, it's up the street. It's in between Selma and Hollywood.

I would totally go in there. Is that like right near Velvet Margarita? Yeah would totally go in there. Is that like up from, is that like right near like Velvet Margarita? Yeah, it's right there. So, Umami Burger and Stout are both like within spitting distance. So, how many, you know, it's kind of like stupid LA a few years ago

was like everybody has to open up a cupcake shop and everybody has to put tuna tartare on their appetizer menu and it's now like there are too many burger places in Los Angeles. There are, but you know what though? I actually welcome it.

I feel like a burger place is more useful than a cupcake place because a burger place you can get a full meal. There are times you just really want a burger. I'm sorry, by the way, I'm not on board with umami necessarily. I think umami sucks. I think umami is good. I don't think it's great. I would never wait in board with umami necessarily. I think umami sucks. I think umami is good. I don't think it's great.

I would never wait in line for umami. I feel like it's too rich. I always leave feeling a little sick. Stout burger is probably my favorite, actually. Really? Stout is delicious. And everyone should go to Stout. If they're in that area, go to Stout.

Although I haven't been to Fuku Burger. I don't eat meat, so I just judge these places on their french fries. Stout has good veggie burgers by the way um and so anyway let's see so there's nothing brenda okay so brenda is still pining after the former fatty uh top chef guy chris carey who is he worthy of um lusting after i don't think so i don't think so much better wait wait wait do you like brenda because some people on our facebook page you like brenda because some people on our facebook page really like brenda and i see her as kind of pathetic i do like her i feel like i would have a hard time being friends with her because she's a little bitchy like when she went

to the show and tell a thing i was like did you notice that everything here is cold well how about you bring a fucking hot thing then brenda okay like just be happy they're getting free food from a private chef okay slash you just said that you like her i know but i'm saying i don't like her attitude i i don't have a hard time being friends with her but as a character on the show i actually like her because i do feel like she she kind of speaks the truth she is a little too bitter though she needs to change that although she needs to get laid she needs to get laid she needs to let go of chris she needs to let chris go realize that's not happening and go get it on with somebody else. But you know what, though?

So my friend Whitney is the one. Whitney Houston. My friend Whitney Houston has a message from the grave. She says, don't be mean. Don't be mean to Brenda. No, my friend Whitney is the one who was Brenda's friend, who they had that whole conversation scene. And Whitney is like a mensch. She's great.

We really like Whitney. So I kind of, I feel like I also trust her judgment. I haven't actually spoken to Whitney about like how Brenda is as a person, but I feel like Whitney, if, you know, if, if Whitney's down with Brenda, I could be down with Brenda too. I'm still not sold on Brenda. I'm certainly sold with her over Nina. By the way, that show and tell, I, I'm sorry. It was ridiculous Nina by the way that show and tell I'm sorry it was ridiculous

that I hate stuff like that would you ever go to a show and tell like that and what would you show um no I would not go to that okay good um what would you show my penis um would you what did you think about

Kat she shared like she shared like a little book and everyone's like oh so boring so stupid i'm like i thought it was fine she gave a little book what else is she supposed to bring like she's supposed to bring like a piece of art she's supposed to bring a matisse in there she was bringing some latisse for her eyebrows it's for eyelashes not eyebrows sorry right now right now brook shields and and Claire Danes are shaking their head. They're clutching their pearls with their beautiful eyelashes. I hate Kat, dude. I hate her.

She's pretty bad. She's pretty awful. Pretty awful. And now, what do you think about this mixologist that's suddenly coming into the mix here? No pun intended. By the way, Derek Hazleton says, Brenda is sarcastic. Love her. I don't know that Derek sounds like that.

Well, I gave him that voice. And Emmy says, please tell me there is a homeless person at the cupcake stand by your house. Then tell me about it on AO. Matt's hobo who stalks him for his pink berry. There are homeless people everywhere. There's a homeless person in the other room. In that bathroom, there's a homeless person. This city is just crawling are homeless people everywhere there's a homeless person like in the other room there's someone in that bathroom there's a homeless person like this city's just crawling with homeless people there's a homeless ghost that just opened the door behind ben yeah this ghost is like i have no house to haunt like get out of this house this isn't your house to haunt go home that shelter you know all the homeless people in la this is gonna sound awful but like

if i were a homeless person in la i would totally totally be homeless on little Santa Monica Boulevard. And I know that we're driving Jets crazy right now on Facebook. She's like, you guys sound like the Californians. But if I were going to be homeless, I'd be homeless on little Santa Monica Boulevard, right by sprinkles cupcakes, where they have a sprinkles cupcakes vending machine outside. That is the place to get it hooked up homeless people for all those homeless people that are listening to this podcast right now i'm telling you little santa monica boulevard outside of sprinkles be there i mean if i if you were a homeless person outside of there i would give you a free cupcake yeah i would even let you pick the flavor unless you picked red velvet because i think red velvet's gross and nobody should eat it not even it's not even starving people um we cannot continue this podcast any further if you like red say if you

are going to say such nasty insensitive mean things about the red velvet flavor i don't know if i can continue with this because you are basically saying you're un-american um you are basically saying you're an al-qaeda by saying you don't like Red Velvet. I refuse. And I'm sure that Brenda would not approve. I'm sure that Kat would not approve. I'm sure Derek Hazleton would not approve. I'm sure that Lisa Kears would not approve.

I'm sure Emi Burbano would not approve. Emi, could you please tell us, is it Burbano or Burbano? I can't, every single week I have to do this. Tell me. Emi says, I knew Ben was going to say his penis. She's a smart one. She's a smart one, that Emmy. She is.

She is. Is there anything left to say about Emmy? Can we talk about Emmy some more? Eat, drink, love. Keep talking about it for a second while I look up the ratings because that will determine if this show is going to last. So it's moving to Thursday nights. Oh, let's talk about that.

That's not normally a good thing. Yeah, that's strange to me that that's going out to Thursday, because nothing else is going to be on Thursday, is there? What night does it normally air on? Sunday, after Jersey, which is a very strange pairing. If this is a wine pairing, that's like giving a glass of red wine with a McDonald's cheeseburger, which, by the way, is a meal I would totally enjoy. Did you see that photo of Beyonce the other day?

She likes to eat In-N-Out burger while drinking champagne. Good for her. Good for her. I like anything with champagne. I love me some fast food. Okay, I'm looking at the ratings right now. Jersey pulled in 2.38 million viewers on Sunday night, and I'm still scrolling down, and I'm still scrolling down, and I'm still scrolling down, and I'm seriously still scrolling down.

All right, well, I'm not going to. Oh, my God, Ben. Is it terrible? 0.5 million viewers. Whoa. And it aired right after The Real Housewives of New Jersey, and Jersey pulled in 2.4 million viewers. Guess what? Eat, drink, love. We can enjoy it for the next few weeks, but it is getting less ratings than Misadvised and – Gal Girls?

Gal Girls. Princesses? Gal Girls and Princesses both did like 700,000 but this is DOA. Well, first of all, Bravo they're idiots because they should have paired this with Top Chef Masters. Okay, like that's the audience

at this show. I think they're trying to go for Caddy. But why not put it with Top Chef? Because these women, the tone of the show is sort of like urban, sophisticated. You can't put that after new jersey what are they thinking it's like you know what like when you put marriage medicine after atlanta guess what it's a natural perfect but when you put vanderpump rules after beverly hills natural fit um long island princesses after um princess long island after jersey should have been a natural fit

but you know it wasn't quite as natural but ashley was so disgusting that people smashed their television sets and i don't blame them exactly but this this show it's not long for this world and uh it's not nearly as good as gallery girls maybe we should just stop talking about it yeah maybe we should i don't know i'm gonna keep watching it let us know on our Facebook page if we should keep talking about Eat, Drink, Love, or if Ben and I are the only two people in the world watching this show, because sometimes I feel like that is the case. By the way, Paula Jones has weighed in with this statement. The only good cupcake is a chocolate cupcake.

Then in all caps, not red velvet. Well then, Paula Jones, I bid you adieu wow I am going to kick you off the Facebook page just kidding you can stay uh let's wrap this up we're just babbling about cupcakes at this point this is okay well why don't you um tell everybody about where they can find us and stuff because you're better at that than I am. Okay. You can find this podcast. Our Facebook page is facebook.com forward slash Watch What Crappens. You really should join. We're not just saying that. We have a lot of people

who engage in it, who write comments. You heard some of them tonight on the podcast. It's really fun. Add it. If you don't like it, then just hide it on your feed and visit it when you want. The podcast Twitter is What crappens you can find matt at life on the m list on twitter instagram vine you can find i don't i don't find

anymore i'm done oh he's done with the vines just only on instagram and uh twitter find me on twitter instagram vine and everywhere else at b-side blog and that includes my site b-side blog.com ronnie has trash tweet tv on uh on twitter and then he's like some other trash tweet trash talk tv with tv i don't know i don't know that's that's gonna be his challenge he's gotta we gotta sort that out follow us on all our platforms and um subscribe to our youtube channel youtube.com forward slash the tv click if you're wondering why it's called the TV click, don't question it. We're telling you where to go. Just go click subscribe.

And that way you can watch this podcast instead of just listening to it. Is that it? Is that all? Again, I'm going to pimp out the iTunes page. We would love another five-star review from you guys. You can do it once a week and you should. You should make it a daily habit. Or a weekly habit, excuse me.

If you are watching this podcast right now, thank you for watching this videocast. Don't forget to also download the podcast tomorrow. Listen to it on Stitcher. Download it on iTunes. Find it on Ben's site, B-Side Blog. Subscribe to it on SoundCloud.

People, we are everywhere. And make sure you, if you watch it on YouTube, why don't you just embed it on your Facebook page and let your friends know too. How about that? How about that? Alright. Thanks, everyone. Bye. Okay, bye. That was an abrupt ending.

Bye. So long, everyone. Thank you for listening. Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye. so long everyone thank you for listening goodbye goodbye Thomas show network have launched a new youtube channel called wait for it it's got interviews with comedians like reggie watts todd glass liza slicinger slicing driving friends with her for

10 years one of the funniest people out there and i still have a hard time with the last name liza our very own owen benjamin that's me takes you on a musical journey down internet rabbit holes and much more you don't have to wait any longer. Just go to youtube.com slash waitforitcomedy. There's no need to wait for it anymore. Because it's here. And it's funny. And I love you. A few days ago,

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Hashtag savings. Geico. 15 minutes could save you 15% or more on car insurance. Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watch What Crappens ad-free on Amazon Music. Download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen ad-free with Wondery Plus in Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondery.com slash survey.