Watch What Crappens - Below Deck Adventure: ADVEEENCHAAA!

Episode Date: November 10, 2022

It's only the second episode of Below Deck Adventure but the douchebaggery is already at a ten. New accents, new villains, but most of all...ADVEEENCHAAAA! This week's bonus is a trailer breakdown of RHOM season 5! Join Patreon at patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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day for a big shot the podcast hello everybody welcome to the show yep there's another below deck so you know that's great brahmam you know just a suggestion might want to get your creatives together and I don't know, great things, okay? Come up with some ideas, okay? It's a fucking, kind of, what are you gonna do next? How many boats do we need at the same time

on this damn channel? It's a lot of boats. Also, why is bravo so scared to say below deck Norway? I mean, come on, or below deck Scandinavia. I don't know what, like it's okay. We can handle it. Like you don't have to gusty it up by saying, it's in cha.

I mean, unless they're gonna just make it that, like next season is off in like, you know, some other part of the world with there's lots of it's in cha, but I have a hard time believing. There's any place that's as full of adventure as Norway based on this show Which is really selling us on Norway is the only place where you find this condom adventure I think because someone probably was like us or me and was like another below deck really Why like that this one's different because the people aren't bathing suits

Cuz it's an adventure It's like oh, okay totally different I feel like next year is like the new below deck will be Blue dick me the boat. It's an event John a boat on a river. It's a jump boat. I don't know I mean like they're running out of room um Vassals yeah, chocolate. He'll just be at Disneyland. Yeah, I understand. They are out of the housewives.

You know, it's like how many housewives can you do? They're still pumping them out. I get it. You know, it's like you can all lose housewives. Okay, well, what else do we do? Okay, well, we'll do younger housewives and call it girlfriends. Okay, let's do that. And so I get below deck, you know, but at least change transportation, you know, like some big rigs, you know, big rig.

Well, they've tried, you know what, Ronnie, they have tried and they have failed miserably every time they try to do the below deck thing on land, whether it's appraise ski, or that weird camp getawayaway or some other things. It hasn't really taken off. Although I did personally enjoy that one very strange show. It was a called tour group. Remember it was so bizarre. It was like a lady who was like in a James Bond movie leading a group of people with

like a male model and they would just go from place to place. And there were just like some dysfunctional people and one of them had some sort of food with Brandy Glandville. I really enjoyed that show but that one did not catch on. I guess it just has to be called below deck real housewives but you know keep working on it guys. Keep thinking about things every day. Just think hey what can I do that's not on a boat. Oh or a housewives show. You know actually I don't mind the housewives show. I don't care if it's 24 hours a day of real housewives, like I'm fine with that. But below deck, come on, something else.

I just got, I just got actually a notification that they have announced the new below deck. It's called below deck, canoe. Oh my God, I cannot wait to see that one. What's gonna happen with three people on a canoe? Oh, well that said you know all my complaining decide Super fun show because you know what you do still cast people that are very funny So your ideas department sucks Bravo sucks, okay?

You're casting department however Aces except you know I could do without hey, let's let's find someone who's Probably actively a criminal. Let's just see if we can get someone to murder somebody else on one of these shows I mean this guy Kyle this fucking cowboy what absolute trash what a piece of shit And I don't want to hear you crying about your mom being in prison and everything else. You piece of shit trash, motherfucker, get off, get off of my television. How dare you, Bravo? Also, when is the next episode? Because... Yeah. He's a trash box. He is a box of trash. He's a box of trash that has a cowboy head on and then eats jellyfish. Okay, this is a person I'm sorry for people who are in his

life. I'm sorry for the people. I'm sorry for all the women he's going to impregnate. And I'm sorry for all the people who will receive microaggressions from him. He is garbage. He is the worst part, like he is the worst product of our civilization at this moment. And of course Bravo found them. They found him, you know, and I feel like they went looking for him, you know, probably didn't even audition to be on that show. They probably just found him somewhere,

found him in some food court and convinced him. Yeah, the duck diet is some adventure. Some gum store, because you know, you never have a shot of this video that chomping on his gum. Also actively just blatantly using, like just completely fucked up the entire time. I mean, his eyes are bloodshot.

He's completely drugged out of his mind. Where's Captain Sandy? Where is Mary time law? Okay. Now, I'm not against getting fucked up, obviously. But you're a work, sir, and you're harassing people. You know? Not good.

Yeah, well, it's like this week is sexual harassment. Next week is just toxic masculinity week. So I feel like he's not going to be on the show very long because this new captain Captain Curie, uh he seems like he doesn't he doesn't fuck around. At least that's how he's presenting himself. At least the way he sort of listen, the way he's sabred that bottle, which we will get to, but the way he's sabred it without making such a big to do about it compared to like every other show that's ever been on Bravo. I mean, the guy sort of does have BDE. We'll have to see if that brings through.

There it is. Below Dick Energy. Energy. No, he has BDA. Below Dick, he can jump. Below Dick energy. Now there's an idea for a show. Just not about it, both at all, but people who just have that below dick energy, you know?

Like you can have like the guy who never sees his kid and always cries about it, but also never goes to see his kid. And you could just have all the below dick energy. So you could just have like a cake chesting type, you know, just criticizing something everybody. Maybe that's what they should do. It's like below deck energy department store. And then we're just in the department store.

It's not below deck, but you could still call it below deck because it has below deck energy. You know, I'm glad you said department store because another thing I wanted to talk about is that below deck adventure brings us also a new chiefs to Faye. And Faye is like from South London, and what's great about her is that she's got one of those

kind of like high pitched British schoolmormy voices that you feel like she actually does work in a department store on the management side, you know? Have you checked the mannequins on the second floor? Would you be a dollar and check those for me, please. Thank you. I can definitely see her holding one of those shirt folder devices you know they look like pizza flippers or whatever I could see her with one of those but she's like I shouldn't have to

do this but I will for the team this what being a team leader is you know team leader is so part of the team. So. And I can also see her wearing Victorian dresses. So like I'm also down with her being part of a modern department store or a department store that is like from 18, like 78 where she's like, we have something called an elevator, you know, like it looks like that's the selling point of the store is that they have steel, steel girders, there's actually a six floor.

Do it. You know, she'd be that person in the store who's like, well, we haven't elevated, but I wouldn't know because I didn't use it because I prefer to get me exercise coming up and down the stairs. And you're like, oh, God, there's fucking fake. I'm talking about her fucking walking up the stairs. Congrats, fake.

You know, we're all applauding you. But you know, I have this device on my piece and it tells me how many steps I've taken. Do you know if that works for stairs as well? Do you know when I have that on the watch? I like, shut up, Faye. Okay, I can faye. I can faye.

And you mentioned before that Faye, to you looks like Beverly DeAngelo. To me, she looks like Melanie Griffith and I think that she's actually just like a perfect mixture of the both of them, which I think is great. I think it's a great, that's a good rising tide. Let's all go, it's no pun intended.

I feel like having both a combination of Melanie Griffith and Beverly DeAngelo energy is gonna be really good for her going both. She really does, she really is a perfect combo of that. She's like Mrs. Griswald. She's perfect. Mix mixed with working girl. Yeah, like I can see her pushing around the dumpling cart, but also leading a little road trip.

Or like marrying, you know, some marrying a gas to just becoming really rich, because she could pull off rich, you know? I kind of love that, let's just capture these movies. It's the rest of this really catch. She would be great. Oh my God. She would be great in all of them. I can also honestly see her playing the role of the shop girls that just Julia Roberts

and pretty woman. You know, I can see her that would be like, mmm, sorry, we don't have anything for you. We don't have anything for you here, though. How does it go down the street, too? But that's the thing, girl. He could play those ladies, but she could also play the Julia Roberts, you know. She could. What?

Big mistake. He's that made me cough. I coughed on my own stupidity. So here we are, a low-deck adventure. We did not cover this last week, because generally we have a rule, one below deck at a time, to keep our own sanity, even though Bravo does not care. They generally we have a rule one below deck at a time to keep

our own sanity, even though Bravo does not care. They do not have that rule, obviously, we do. But then we watch the show and, wow, how can you not? I mean, Beverly DeAngelo and working girl, and the same person. We're in Beverly Griffith. Beverly Griffith, Melody DeAngelo. We'll also let's not forget that last week. We were also. Beverly Griffith, Melanie DiAngelo. We'll also let's not forget that last week. We were also appreciating the end of real girlfriend, some Paris. We wanted to give that space. Now that that has moved on, we've had North to Norway.

That shows you the way we are. We're back energy, Paris. The end. It's just all on a baton. Congratulations. You just got to get the fan. 345. Okay.

You're welcome. I would be into below deck baton mood. Like I'm not going to lie. It's pretty simple show that. So last week was the first episode of this and it was, you know, just so it was a good one to skip, I think, because it was mostly just the, oh my god, this bed is filthy. But it's very spastic. It's so filthy. And you know, people unpacking and stuff like that, the new chef, Jess, who does yoga in the kitchen, you know, always listen, I love his chef with their head on the, on the kitchen floor.

I mean, that sounds sanitary. She seems pretty good for the most part. There was her, all the the cast of characters is pretty good. Of course, you know that the Cowboys get crashed his car into the side of the building. You know? Yeah, he's terrible. I like Jess because she looks like she just got out of a movie she hated and now it just wants to go to sleep. She hated it. I don't want to even talk about it. Um, Jess and then let's see. There's Cowboy who is what a dumbass. He's like, I mean, I'm a cowboy. Look, it says right here on my arm. And he lifts his arm and it says Cowboy. Yeah, very on the nose. Although it's not on his nose.

But yeah, it's like, as soon as he did that. That's my really lost respect room. I just I can't I can't deal with big. Obvious. I hate it. It's like I love my arm. Food addict. You know, like you need that. I don't need you know, you know, your job is not to label yourself.

Okay, it's my job to label you. That's right way my joy. You know, yeah, exactly. I don't give yourself just a simple, simple cowboy. You're on the yacht. So, sir, you might mean your cows. Yeah. Rears your land.

I want the cast of you to get stuck in a room with this guy. Okay. We'll see who's a cowboy. That's, that's right. There's also Nathan, who is up in the Caribbean, and he seems cool. He seems nice. He's cute. And he automatically, like I automatically just like him because he has been on the receiving end of Kyle being obnoxious, so I'm already staying away from Nathan. But then, so like really anyone, like I'm probably gonna take up for anyone that Kyle's a dick too, so Nathan's the first one. And then there's also, there's another guy named Mike and there's a boaston named Lewis, and the thing that's hard for me is that Lewis looks like a Mike and Mike looks

like a Lewis to me Well, I you know, it was hard for me to remember Lewis's name For sure because he just doesn't seem like a Lewis. He seems like what's the kid who played Alex be Keaton on this show? Michael Kid Michael. They pop oh Eddie. Yeah, he's kind of like a starter Eddie You know that you have to put together yourself Back in the day. Or an off brand like an Amazon rip off Eddie, like you go to Amazon to buy an Eddie and it comes in and it's like not that it's very like I'm just here to please dad. You know, he's got that energy going on and then like really thirsty hair and not thirsty

because it's not moisturized because it is. I mean, it's got a lot of product in it. But just like, poor guy, I just feel bad for him when I see his hair because he just wants people to like him so bad. You know, it makes me not like... But he's like very common British. Yeah, but he's very much like, oh my god, don't hate me. Or Iqbro, you know, he's one of those. He's like, it's just stuff with stuff with my right bro no they beat you up if you weren't there must you know what I mean especially the cowboy cowboy wouldn't be talking to you he'd be making fun of you and

putting bricks through your windshield yeah the one thing with Lewis is that he does have like those and I'm not just saying this because it's British actually I probably am but he kind of has like a James Gordon squint and that makes me not trust him very much. He's got a pre, he's got, I can see him turning into James Gordon. Not talent wise, but it looks wise. He's got those legs like you. I can see him ending up on the James Gordon, a gene inside of the gene pool.

On that spectrum. Yeah, he's going on that path. Yeah. And then Mike, Mike, Mike is his whole thing is that he worked, he's worked on commercial path. Yeah. And then Mike, Mike, his whole thing is that he worked on commercial vessels. So he's like, been on barges, and now he's working on a boat. So that says, there's not really much about Mike so far. He's sort of like, he's sort of like, odd looking, kind of like a little creature, like a little woodland creature that came on board, you know, and put on pants. He's like a woodland creature. And his act, like I could see him kind of crouching

in a tree, you know, like a tree branch looking down at me. I could see that. There's probably a lot of acorns in his bed, right? Like you know, if you go into a state like, like, what are all these acorns, these go up and I can't come in peace. I'm creature, you know. So there's, yeah, he's kind of boring.

I get creepy vibes from him too. He's got some creepy I vibes. Hold on. Report power loss by texting outage. Oh Jesus, don't you start with me, electric company, okay? I can text this. I've had enough of you today, Texas. Okay. This is an election day. I'm already pissed off. I don't need a text from the power grid. Sorry, back to the activists. You know, power grid is, I feel like a four-letter word in Texas to this. So then we have our stews. We have Orianna. And Orianna, I still don't have the right words to describe her, but she's from like Newton mass juices or something like that. And I think that her parents are in academia, or at least one of them is, which I'd like,

because you just know how disappointed they are in her. And like you just can feel it and everything that she's doing, you can sort of see is both a rebellion and also a, like, she's seeking out approval of them being like, see, I chose not to go to Wells, Leigh and I'm on on a boat and I'm being creative instead while I'm throwing up in my bed. And you know her parents like it would stay in Boston. You would have had mild food and you wouldn't be. It's a very privileged girl's rebellion. I think you're right.

Yes, like her rebellion is like, look, I'm made, you know, I'm not called Jesus. It's like she's not out doing like heroin and you know, dropping children all over the world and you know, whatever. She's just a maid. And then her, one of her first rebellions was, I'm gonna be a stilt walker. It's like, oh my God, really?

Wow, that was it. You know, your mom's at home crying in the bathroom. That's what's like, honey, that's gonna be worse, okay honey? It could be much, much worse. The mom's like, so have you reconsider joining Model UN? No, I'm doing stills, mother. Yes, but, you know, I heard that Wellesley really likes people who went to Model UN. Stills! You know, I heard that Wellesley really likes people who went to model you in. I'll never be a model mother, but I'll be taller than all of them.

So, she does that. Also, we find out that the other stew, Casey, used to work under Orianna, and some other both that they worked on, and Orianna was like the chiefs do, and Casey was the second stew. And so now Orianna is all bitter, that she's like been demoted basically, and has to work with Casey. And Casey is another piece of work, who she's like, I was born in Seattle, but then I moved to somewhere, Costa Rica, and now I have an accent on every fifth ward. Yeah. She's one of those. And now I have an accent on every fifth ward.

Yeah, she's one of those. It's like a very specific Bravo type. But like, she definitely has that random oxen that comes out of nowhere. And you're like, but I'm from Seattle. It's like, what? And apparently she doesn't, she never really listens. She was like a mannequin stew for Rihanna. So there's like a disaster. Yeah, they hate each other.

So then let's see, I'm a single Pringle. Oh, that's Alex P. Keaton, the second Lewis. He's still, I still can't remember his name. Okay, so that's basically the first episode. We met everybody. Let's get into this current episode. Episode number two, I hope, it's Niduncha! So because they're taking a yacht into a fjord it's like it's the fjords go really deep really quickly just like me

and this podcast too let's be honest we go deep crap so there's, you came for the crap ends, you stayed. For the sake of the mint. Yeah, we're welcome to our fjord. You're about to get fjorded. But so like long story short, anchoring is tricky. It's a tricky thing to anchor in a fjord. And so Captain Kerry tells Nathan, FYI, on night shift, this is way up to look up where I'm going to tell you all this, and then you tell Kyle, and he may act like he knows what

Light knows is already, but you have to really push through and tell him everything. So last week, Nathan was trying to tell Kyle and Kyle, like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I know, I know, yeah, you don't have to tell me this. I just kept it the part that I don't know yeah it's just being a real dick. And he's like but I'm supposed to tell you I'm supposed to tell you how to do he's like oh 10 years shut up shut up haven't you stopped talking okay haven't let's talk more walking you know he's a real prick and so that's where we open this week so he's like so what are you saying we just do the lines every two hours and he's like no we open this week. So he's like, so what are you saying? We just do the lines every two hours and he's like,

no, we do the lines every hour, all right? And I'll show you what he wants me to show you. And he's like, get it out as fast as possible, man. Get to it, bro. Yeah. And he's like, no, I'm not gonna say a bunch of shit. Don't rush me. I gotta take my time because yeah,

but other people don't learn that way. I hate when people do that. Oh, that's not the way I learn, okay? Well, based on any of your behavior and your tattoo, I'm not sure you've learned shit, so don't tell me about how you learn. Gum, chomp, gump. So Nathan's like, just watch me and he's like,

mate, this is my thousandth time doing this. This ain't my first rodeo. I'm a cowboy. Rain more. You're not a cowboy just because you're from Texas. You're just a hick, okay? So cut the shit, sir. Right.

So Nathan's like, I know that Kyle has more experience than me. I'm really not gonna, I can't, like honestly, my brain is not able to do like a Caribbean accent today. So I'm just going British. So I know that Kyle has more experience than me, but dude, you don't need to be a dick about it. It's like, this is Kyle, he has to be dick about everything.

I'm just telling you this right now. After one episode, I know he has to be a dick about every single thing in his life. So you know how to read that? Yes or no. Do you know how to read that? What I'm pointing at you right now? He's like, ah, oh, dude. And he's like, ah, I heard you. And he's like, okay, we'll just watch it

and go, or what? Or what? So, you know, you're never gonna win that one, right? So finally, he just leaves him there. I was really hoping the boat was just gonna explode because it was not fair to like have this much of a build up and then have it turn out okay. It was not okay for me.

Right. So, and then meanwhile, down on the galley, Jess just is on fire. There's a full fire. And she's just like, stupid, stupid, fire. Being a ship, you have to have practices that bring you back to center and calm you down, find and calm in the chaos. People are coming on the yacht with fivestar experience and they gallify or not. I have to deliver.

It's like, just I know you're doing a tree pose right now, but your leg is fully inflamed. You're a new balance. It's on fire, babe. You know. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crap and scum. Celebrity beef. You never know if you're just going to end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter

or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife. And I'm Sydney Battle. And we're the host of Wonder E's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the build-up, why it happened, and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feud say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between why it happened and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feuds say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud.

But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or W Yeah. I'm there, so... Like, also another issue with this boat is that the stew pantry is not connected to the galley, so anytime the chef needs the stews, she can't just be like, okay, it's ready. She has to call down to them and so far, Faye is like not very good with her headpiece,

her, I mean, her, her walkie-talkie, because her, your piece keeps popping out and let's be honest, you can just can tell that Faye doesn't know how to use a walkie-talkie. You know, she's probably asked so many people, I'm sorry, then this part, this is the walkie talkie. No, that's a cucumber. Oh, oh, you know, it might mistake, it might mistake. That's not explain why don't you have it? She's such a cool person who doesn't use her earbud because like she looks cuter without it and then gets mad that everybody gets mad at her.

Like, really? Sorry, I didn't use my radio, then. Yeah, user radio, you dumb dumb, you're on a boat. So the drunk asshole of the group is like, well, who is dinner? This is definitely the latest time I've ever eaten dinner. And one of the other ladies is like, yeah, it's very European.

It's very European. So then the food is finally delivered and it's a steak and like one broccoli, so that was funny. It's like here's your steak and your broccoli. You'll one crispy broccoli. I know. Joy that. I know and they just love it and they're one guy keeps on saying, best chef I've ever had, best chef, I ever had. So and then they're all like playing around and stuff and then they ask what time they want to have breakfast and the guys like, uh, 7 a.m. They're all just like, what the hell? It's 1 a.m.

Who eats breakfast? That's a good fit at 1 a.m. They're shopping at least 48 more hours before they'll hungry again. So everyone goes to bed. So then the next morning, the chef is in the kitchen doing like lifts, you know, on her hands and knees during my class. And she's like, well, they say that the way that you start your day is the way that your day goes.

So I tried to meditate at the start of every day. There's a lot of energy, output, output, output, and I have to be on the whole time. Look at me on. You know, some people have resting bitch face. I have resting jazz hands face. Look at my face. Just look at it. Look at this energy just glowing off of my face. What about what about my eyelids being halfway down my eyes? Doesn't say I'm so excited right now. So she tells us that You know she meditates first thing she does in the morning. She meditates. She has lemon water and then she has coffee All right, because the way you start your day is the way it goes. I hope that that's not true because it explains a lot about my days. Yeah, yeah, I have a very inauspicious starts to my days that that does actually explain a lot.

You know, I'm having a cold pizza, you know, the cold pizza and pouring up kind of a day. What can I tell you? Hey, you know what though, I did make Chris B. Edge pancakes today after all that below deck my discussion. And I don't remember the last time I ever made pancakes on a weekday, especially right before a podcast. So maybe this means good things are going

to happen today. Who knows for me at least. So Kyle, meanwhile now Kyle, Michael's coming in to relieve Kyle in the wheelhouse. So Kyle has to give him the information. He's just like, okay, I'm going to do it the easy way because I'm doing five minutes in sped it, like the 30 minutes that he was taking when he taught me stupid things. Okay, that's the radar, that's the wheel, that's the window, those are fjords, that's water,

don't crash. Okay, good. Kamui out. That's water don't crash Cowboy out so then Lewis is with Captain Kerry and Carey it's like I want to give you plan night anchor 9.45. Hey to anchor fruit. Vincha Then go to show I had to play on the beach Just didn't end that one The say adventure every other word.

Okay. So every two words, all right, it's a, it's a six, six, six hundred o'clock. I don't know how to do maritime law. It's six hundred o'clock in two hours. We look and be at the quarter past adventure. Okay, moving on. So, um, so now phase with Jess and she's like, so yesterday was Napkin's chit-chow,

I didn't mean that you was a chit-chow, you was the one that felt you was not a chit-chow at all, but everything else was a chit-chow, particularly everything around you, all the food and the food coming out, but you were fine, you were not a chit-chow at all. I think not the same mistake, Kim, and you just trust me. Feel comfortable. And hopefully

we can move forward from there. And Jess is just standing behind her, looking at her, like, God damn, piece of crap. Did you start your morning by watching the dog take a crap on the sidewalk? Because that's about what level of your work is there. You just piece of just south London trash. Did you have any of your coffee? Do you see or are determined to be friends, but they kind of already hate each other? And it's so funny, because you know they had that discussion right when they came on about like,

you know, I just want us, you know, we're two women in the industry and we just need to get along. And this is, you know, they have, you know, they did two women in the industry and we just need to get along and this is, you know, they have, you know, they did, because they're looking at each other like, I'm really trying to stick to this whole women empowerment thing, but I also want you dead.

Very, very sad. Just hit her. And it kind of hates her too, because just calls her out in a very calm way, you know. She's like, well, if we have radios, we need to listen to the radios because otherwise I've got food down there. There's no one who can hear me because I'm in a basement down. It'd be nice if someone listened to that. I'm sorry, I'm talking to you from down here because

really I need to have my ankles in the air. Well, I'm terribly sorry that I missed your call for food. It's just that, unfortunately, with your busy voice, I thought you were one of the deck hands spotting a well shark in the middle of the field or something. I just tuned it out. Apologize. So she's the chef is like, well, I think that you haven't had real coffee yet or something. She's like, three coffees. What are you talking about? And the chef just laughs like this.

Oh, oh, god. She's like this made every time she lets out a laugh. Like I can't believe I'm a little bit like, I don't know if she was judging her like, oh, this is your energy. This is you with energy, god help us. Or if she was like, what, this is your energy. This is you with energy. God help us. Or if she was like, what a sick fucking person. Three coffees by six in the morning. Oh my God. There was just

like judgment on every syllable that she uttered. Yeah. So meanwhile, Ariana, her stomach is still bad because she had bad. I can't. I'm already calling it hate her. Hate her. First charter. She's like, well, I work really, really hard, which is why I'm the best. And that's why I was chiefs to. She had Casey Sats. Oh, I had chicken salad. I can't work.

So she spends the whole first charter not working. Everyone else say that chicken salad, they were fine. I'm not buying this chicken salad. I think you're a little, I think your stomach is reacting to you not being in charge stilts. Yeah, I, you can already tell that her dad is getting just like totally made fun of at the faculty lounge at Tulsa University

or wherever he teaches, you know? So, so she's like, on my old boots, when someone was sick, they were generally faking it to get out of work. But I'm scared that Faith thought I was faking it in some way, but I wasn't, I wasn't thinking it at all. And she says, yeah, she does, like, work. She thinks I'm faking it, so I need to show her that's not the case. I was like, what, now you're gonna be extra sick to show her that it wasn't just a flute. I wasn't just sick that one day.

I'm sick every day. She only takes a little shot of Dre now. Gets back on the floor. Yeah. She's going to munch out on herself just so nobody thinks she's faking it. Yeah. So now there's breakfast orders and everyone wants eggs. And then Jess is like, everyone, everyone especially Americans like their eggs completely different

The poached fried scrambled omelette stupid dumb dumb eggs. That's a popular one with Americans and you don't want to screw The eggs first thing in the morning because it puts a bad taste in their mouth Sort of like when your chief stew doesn't deliver hot sticks to guests when they are ready for them any who I remember I had an owner and she liked eggs over easing just had to happen perfect and there could be no brown giving that me as for years because you feel very tested by Nanook lock in the morning Very very test she's like squeezing like all her silver wear and her hands crushing it You don't want to start anyone with a runny yolk day. Have you ever been someone who's having a runny yolk day?

Not on my watch. So everyone's like, wow, these eggs are good. Like this poor lady. I love that she's the kind of, because she does have that look of stress like on those British detective shows, you know, how the lady detectives are just always like so harried, you know, it's like, and then you find 100 pack stories and they're so depressing.

And it's like the point of the show, you know, a capy valley for anyone who watches those. So she's got that kind of demeanor about her, but then to find out her trauma is just having someone insisting on proper eggs kills me. I'm I'm telling you there's there's a streak of James Gordon about this show. There's a streak of it. I don't think I've got damn moron. I love James. He says like, well, you know, I thought I was a fine person, but then I realize I realize something I'm not and I'd like to thank you all for bringing that to my attention. Okay.

Yeah, thanks James. So everyone's happy breakfast and there are 10 minutes from angering, angering for adventure and phase telling everyone, she's like, hello everyone. So today you will be going caveings. Is that okay with everyone? You'll be climbing into a little cave and seeing some sexual harassment on display. Please, please, please raise your hand if you have any objections now. No, okay.

Well, of course, there's one lady's like, oh my god, I'm so scared. How am I going to cave? What am I going to do? I can't cave. You're on below deck. It means child. So suck it up, lady. I don't want to You're on below dick. It means child. So suck it up, lady. I don't want to hear it from you.

So Kyle's been on the platform to cowboy and the guests are starting to go out on the kayaks or whatever. And he's just like, okay, get on out there. All right. Go ahead. Food Tiger. Woohoo. Yee-hee. Oh.

And so they're going out and then, uh, bored Nathan, it's like, wait a minute. Do they have, do they have festons? They need to have festons. But why don't they, hey, come back here to get your festons. He's like, stop yelling then, stupid! Yeah, I mean, the what, we see the water temperature is 55 degrees, which is actually very cold.

Like, if you're gonna fall on that, that's gonna be, that's gonna be rough. If you're going to fall on that, that's going to be rough. They definitely need to have their best. He's like, there's one guy on a paddle board and he's like, hey, can you paddle back? He's like, can you paddle back and we'll give you a vest? And he's like, hey, hey, hey, you can just take it to him. You know what? Ninth and Hats just shut up and listen, instead of always having something to say. At which point, I'm like, all right, I am definitely picking up on some microaggressions. I don't know if that's just my liberal old self. I think I was like.

I was like, there's straight up aggression. There's nothing micro about this. Like he doesn't hide it at all. He's like, oh yeah, y'all know who's really in charge here. Right, a boom problem solved. Yeah, but I definitely felt like, I think I am getting the sense that Kyle is not comfortable with someone who's not only lower them

than him or as he proceeds on the chain, but also someone who is a person of color, barking orders. Like this is, I'm definitely getting that vibe, and I'm not happy about it. Yeah, this guy's a real piece of shit. And so he's like so, so Lewis is like, so it's going great today. He's in tit bro and he's like, well, we're doing this.

I'm just cahack and shit. And he's like, well, and this water would probably be advisable unless you don't think so. In which case, I'll be on your side. Just tell me what side to be on. He's like, well, it's like ripin' and shit. And you know what, that dude over there, and he's to pop down. And he's like, who? He's like Nathan. He's like,in' and shit. And you know what, that dude over there, Henny's to pop down.

And he's like, who? And he's like Nathan. He's like, freaking out, yelling. Ves, ves, ves. You know what, I'm down here. I'm a trained lifeguard, okay? Hey, look, there's jellyfish. Oh, God, son.

Ah! Ah! If you're such a trained lifeguard, why are you starting a jellyfish and set up the people out there in the freezing cold water? And so the Lewis makes a joke because he gets, oh catch it. Or maybe he says catch it.

But either way, the boat like Lewis is like, well, not gonna, I don't think he should catch it because of what it would be draining out your hands. You'll just be trying not to get sung because it's a jellyfish and you don't need to catch it right now because now those kind don't sting. So he goes, he's heaps up the jellyfish and then Lewis laughs and goes, he cheats and then he goes, okay. He swallows the jellyfish. What the hell?

What? Why? Oh, it was horrible. I was joking. Who would eat a jellyfish? Wow. that guy. So then Orianna is freezing the sheet to remember. She's like spring sheets.

And Casey just walks fast and she says, Hey, me and me help. And she says, Casey, I'm good down here though. Okay, I'm good though. So. Yeah. And Casey does the classic blow deck thing where she leaves the room and then flares her eyes about. Okay, I'm good now. So yeah, in case like it's odd, she case he does the classic blow deck thing where she leaves the room and then

flares her eyes at the camera like this bitch am I right? Catch me all season. So then, so now Lewis pulls over Nathan and he's like, Hey, hello, that good to see you. Um, I how did you were shouting at the guests about live rafts? You were out of control and maniac and being totally unprofessional, anything like that? No, I didn't shout at them directly. I told them it's best they turn around.

And those were like, well, Kyle felt it was a bit, like a little bit like you were overriding him because he was trying to run things. And you were trying to say stuff to him and like, yeah, biggie. Like, why are you, it is no biggie. Why are you even saying this to Nathan? Yeah, I'm just not thinking about where you talking shit like a little gossip. Like, well, he's really mad at you. So, I mean, just saying, okay, go back to your day. Just know that that guy hates you now. So, and he tells us, well, my way of leadership may not be the best. I mean, that's be honest. I try to avoid conflict

or natural hair of any kind. A previous crew member had an intervention with me and told me, please stop being the devil's advocate. I'm just such a good person. No, you're a jellyfish, okay? And how are you even in a position of power over anybody? People like this make me crazy. Like I'm just too nice. No, you're a worse, okay? And your aggression is being weak, you know? You can just always say, it's just me just trying to be nice. No, letting some hic run like that all over your bow, acting like trash and treating people like trash, that's your fault, dude. I hate that little smiley like, no, my fault. I'm just a nice person. No, you're not you're enabling assholes. You're worse

I I mean, I think I like Lewis more than you do, but I did agree that I did not think it was necessary to like indulge Kyle's toxic masculinity small penis, you know catboy Bullshit by then going to Nathan and being like, hey, don't like Kyle was trying to do something, like don't try to like override him. Like there was, that was like unnecessary. You like, you at what, what Nathan should have done, I mean, Lewis, what's got to have such British names.

Nathan Lewis, they, you should have just been like, okay Kyle, like settle down, he was just trying to help but whatever so He should be like back on board I'm be sending people out on a kayak in 50 degree water. Yeah without their life jackets Yeah, that's what a leader does. They're not just like well whatever you want Well, if you want to know that's not how it works You have to wear your fucking life fest. You can't get on the toy. Okay. I know that and I'm just a few wherever show I'm not trained. Do on a toy. Okay, I know that. And I'm just a few were of a show.

I'm not trained. Do your goddamn job. Oh, yes. Yeah, no, I agree. Louis should have come down hard on that too. So the guests come back and board, and this is what they say. Well, let's get our adventure clothes on. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, So then the stews, Faye Orianna and Casey are talking.

And they say, girls, I love this. Yesterday was a sheet show. Casey stepped it up because he, Orianna, but poorly. Okay. And I know that you're gonna love this execution, Casey, because you did everything because chicken salad over there couldn't work. You are gonna get to go caving. How does that sound?

With an actual caveman. Actually, that sounds for you. I love that she told she like gave that look to Orianna with like a cringe face like, I love that turn of phrase because you know, obviously she meant like you were, you know, like you were ill but you were poorly like it literally means like you existed poorly yesterday you as a human We're doing a poor job of having a presence You with the cases like oh my god. Yes, anything that has to do with like haw Hawks or Stalls. And so, face like, a Hawks or a exhaleration or beauty last chance. Adventure. Close. You're very, very close.

Adventure. Adventure, yes, it's Adventure. You may go. So now Lewis is talking to Nathan and Kyle about this adventure. And he goes, does anyone have a problem with claustrophobia? And Nathan's like, not me, not me. Like, I'm ready. I'm like caveman and like eats his chest,

like as a joke, like caveman. And then Kyle tells us, Nathan seeks a lot of attention. It's so cringy. It's not even funny. You just ate a jellyfish. You just ate a jellyfish, okay? Sir.

And then his example of this is the Guest are all high-fiving. And they're like, oh, I thought you were trying to high-fives me. Oh, he's like cringey. That is embarrassing. That is just embarrassing. So now the guests leave to go on this adventure.

And the Caribbean meets like Armageddon it's just like the most like It's like they're on like a they're on like a tender going to like a tiny like Up here next to a cute little house And Casey goes I've never done anything like way before before. And I'm like super stoked because nowhere else in the world has the beauty and adventure. Like again, are you using your radio now? Yes, I'm using the radio now.

I just want you to do it one more time. Adventure. Come on, Casey. Let's go on the adventure. Yes, adventure. Carry on. So nothing says adventure like Runa. Hello, I'm welcome to joy. My name is Runa and I will take you to a little cave. A little tiny baby cave. Baby was it gave? It's like Runa, why are you making

kind of your own cave? Sorry, I get excited sometimes. So they all get dressed in their cave equipment or whatever, their repalers or whatever, adventures clothing and the maintenance. Like yeah, normally it's jet skis, a wakeboarding or something like that, but nothing like this. This is the first time I've ever been with guests

that haven't all their clothes. And thank God, because if you're gonna cast any show that needs to wear clothes, is this crew? So now they are hiking or as I like to call it And then they're going up then they're now they're going down into a cave and There's like there's like carabiner's music of rope, but there's also candles in the cave's like romantic. And they're all going down there while everyone else back at on the boat is cleaning. And then Jess, she's like, I've made a home, I'm going to make homemade hot chocolate for when the guests come back. Stupid.

Yeah. So I was drinking fresh cookies out of the oven, you know, how they say fresh cookies, hot chocolate. Do you think they'd like that? Faith, I guess. And she goes, well, what's the vibe for the birthday tonight? What's the vibe? Vegas. Cake. This is gonna kill her.

It's time for commercial. It's time for a crap and it's commercial. So we go back to gaming and You know it's getting darker and darker and the cab was like I think I just pulled McKinney You just ate a jellyfish fucking Yeah, that might have something to do with it and then there And then one lady goes oh, isn't it nice to not be a mom?

Because Nathan's doing it for us. And Nathan has like a little backpack. He's like, anyone I got water, I got gum, I got mentos, whatever you need, I got it. He's like, has all this snacks for them. So they just like love it. And then, and then he gets like a little, oh, now we get a little bit of a blow deck backstory.

So he's like, mom's a powerful man. Like, if anyone can be perfect at it. And then I think of, I think of anyone who can be perfect at things and I think of like my mom, because she's like the best. She's just a girl actually. Like that's the least dark story we've ever heard of this show. I'm like, I was waiting for the part about your childhood

and for a lot of day, or having to drive your sister when you were three years old, like where's that? I think this is the first person who's ever been on the show with her, like, give us your gritty backstory. And he's like, I'm happy and I love my mom. I'm like, all right, well, you're already cast. Okay. Let's go with that.

So the cow, then we get the cowboys. Now this is the real one. He's like, growing up, my mom was always in and out of prison. We were always poor, and we didn't get it on the chance to go on vacation anywhere. And every day I look at myself where I am, and I pretty much got here on my own. So I'm pretty proud of that one.

Oh, never mind, I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm sad. God, this Norwegian air is making my stomachs all tingling and burning on the inside. It's almost like I'm getting stung by something. So there's more caving. So Kasey and Nathan are like sitting by a candle and these guests are like real instigators. They're like, oh, you guys should look like you'll be your couple because this happens on below deck.

This happens actually all the time where guests are always trying to make stews like there's always like a stew in a deck And they're always trying to like get them together as a couple So now they're really trying to instigate it like oh you guys would be a couple. Oh, is this your first day? Oh you guys on your first day? I go home. I like go for a kiss go for a kiss a lot of candle for us Here we are having our first adventure together. And at least like, oh my god, you guys are hooking up. And the husband's like, yeah, they're having a moment. Kids, you guys should make out, make out. And Casey tells us, yeah, I'm all for good

banter. Like, you know, when I said, come on. And then he said, adventure. You know, that was fun. But if it starts crossing the line, my please don't keep going. So the guys are chanting, kisser, kisser. And so he tries to and she kind of moves her face so he gives her like a big kiss on the cheek and hugs her close.

They're romantic little fire going. Yeah, yikes. And yeah, it's just, it's not great. And then she's basically like yeah There'll be situations where guests will have these moments and then says that basically You know, you have to deal with those situations in a professional manner and Kyle did not deal with it well So then wait this I love this because now they're heading back to the boat and now the music is up loud the music is extra against it And they even have like this chorus like a

And it is like so like monumental and huge and big and then just got suggest just making a chocolate cake and putting raspberry on top You got it like you got to like get the right music for a chocolate cake and putting raspberries on top. It's like, oh! You gotta like, you gotta like, you gotta like get the right music for a chocolate cake. I think you guys maybe overshot that one. I don't really really did. She's like, hands, raspberry, and blue, berry. Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don, don, don't, don, don, don, don, don, don't, don, don't, don't, don, don't, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, And Orianna's like, oh my God, they're having their 40th birthday on a boat. I mean, I hope I'm on a yacht from my 40th.

I want to make it. So I have 13 years, so I need to make it. So I want to be rich. I want to be with someone rich or make it only for the count. That's been done. Okay, go back to Stilts. Okay, go back to Stilts. Okay. Go back to Stilts.

Okay. Go back to Stilts. Her mom was like, well, honey, maybe if you'd taken that scholarship to Wells, you would have been well on your way, but not now, unfortunately. Yeah. The Accrescent related market. All right, Stilts. So, the guests get back and they're handling them all towels and they're setting the table

and all that. And they get their hot chocolate and cookies. And of course, because they're these guests. Oh my gosh, there are booze in my hot chocolate. So only way we're having that. We're party animals. Yeah, and one of them I was like a little upset with because she came back and was like,

what an excursion? I'm like, man, this is not called a politic excursion. I think you're gonna have to try that one again. What? Sorry, go ahead. Sorry. Excuse me. I was about to say some very important Ronnie.

What an adventure. Okay, that's a good one. I'm a lady, I think, who's like terrified. She's like, caving. How am I gonna go caving on this excursion? You don't belong here, okay? You can't, here, okay? You can't Cave and you can't say Adventure, Go Home.

That's my advice to you. So then in the mess, Cacy is talking to the weirdo Mike. And she's like, so you've just been on a yacht before, right? And he's like, well, I've been on a boat, but not a yacht. But I do like this because they gave me super short shorts. Like these. Yeah, look at my legs. And she's like, oh my God, I thought you were from the UK or something because you're like Harry Potter-ish.

And he's like, I am not from the UK, but I'm too stupid. I have report off. Oh my God. Can I talk to anybody on this fucking boat? Yeah. And he goes, she uncrumpets, she uncrumpets, look at me and my short shorts.

Do I look like a Brit and Lewis goes, yeah, lucky you. And my goes, look at me. I don't know what he's saying. Look at me. Look at, did you say look at me? He like can't understand a British accent.

I'm last up taking maps. So then, Fay is on her radio, which I'm proud of her for having. And she's like tonight is the birthday party. We've got to be on Folt's night. The birthday party. Okay. So then the chef is saying, well, they said they wanted to stay on the birthday night. So I'm taking that and no way has to offer. I'm going to make magic. What's the opener? And broccoli. Don't get it. There will be one piece of broccoli on every plate. So they are the guests are like sitting at the table and they're like joking about what's the 50th birthday gonna be like and then one lady goes How do you have a party in outer space? You know the guy goes you just

Plan it. I'm like oh so Faye is calling for Casey to come help Because it's time for service right. They've got to do service for the basement up so she's time for service, right? They've got to do service for the basement up. So she's calling for Casey, and Casey's radio is blaring really loud. And she's like, sorry guys, I'm quite sorry, she's like,

cause my radio's so loud. Hey, let me give you some Vortas. Would anybody like some Vortas? So the chef is starting to go crazy, right? She's like, timing, timing, timing, food is hot, let's roll people. All right, when I call you, it doesn't mean 10 minutes from now, it means right now. Alright, that's a runny, yoke days.

Damn, maybe one of them. And then, and she's gonna be serving up octopus, so she's like, getting octopus right. There's a fucking mission. You want it to be crispy on the outside, soft on the inside. You don't want to taste the cat's eye. It is a delicate process. It requires concentration and focus and love and taste like chicken. Not that Americans. So they love it, of course. And then, favoring some champagne and they ask the captain to

savor the champagne because the captain comes. And I like that the captain won't eat with the gas He just shows up for like a drink at the end But I like this captain so far. Yeah, so he shows up and they're like we use Sabre this and he's like Oh, I've crossed the Atlantic or that one summer we pirates. I've fenced with an entire submarine crew underwater I think I can save or a bottle of fucking champagne underwater. I think I can save a rebottle of fucking champagne. Boom! He literally says he's been struck by lightning. I don't know if he meant his boat or himself, but he really has one-up captain sand. They're all ready. Catacombs, he's like, well, I mean, I did outrun some parts. Yeah, well, did you get when poirots and also get struck by lightning. No, no, it's not. You just got carried. So then

the drunk is like, hey man, say some words, captain, he has released the cracking. Also, if it does it loses. Hey, let me, let me leave you with this is a ge- let me leave you with this suggestion a geodabra. Let me leave you with this suggestion have something to drink God damn morons these people have children fucking way so Mike and Lewis bring in the toys while the cowboy sleeps and Nathan's on break and the chef's like okay interior interior ready for service and

Casey's like um you guys were missing some forks Girls girls can I play just and hear me on the radio? Where do we have forks? I'm talking on the radio. Am I talking to myself? God, I feel like you're a bunch of misshapen eggs, right? Now just torturing me. Is anyone there? Eggs with a touch of charm. So basically while there's like Casey and what's earth base are and Fay are like figuring

out this like fork situation, Jess is calling for help and they're not hearing Jess calling for help. So finally, Bay comes and she's like, hi, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I've arrived. I'm here. And just is like, well, you haven't radioed me about service. Have you cleared nothing? And they get, oh, I cleared, sorry, I did clear. Just, okay, well, I'm one person down here and I have no eyes. You're cooking blind. Well, why didn't you say so? You know, we have so many amenities for you here. Hold my hand. and I will lead you to the bathroom.

It is a metaphor you idiot. Oh, I'm a little stuck in a basement while you're up there dense around with folks. Can you please let me know what's going on? And she's like, more communication. Coffee, communication. Okay, I guess I would be giving you communication. And she's like, all right, food, heat, I've got steaks run called, food is ready, we can

go, go now and face like, they're busy right now. They can't really take the sick right now. Very, very busy. She's like, well, tell them to be down in two minutes. I will not have this. And she's like, well, you know, I have all kinds of chefs. Grampish chefs, happy chefs, salty chefs, cereal killer chefs, cereal loving chefs, all kinds of chefs, grandpa chefs, happy chefs, Sony chefs, cereal killer chefs, cereal loving chefs, all kinds of chefs. I mean, she's a good chef, but I'm not here to argue with you,

girl, do your job and get on with it. You do your job. Get the bottom floor. You're the one missing for exclusive. By the way, I love her. I don't know why I'm yelling at face so much. It's like my favorite thing about it. I don't know why I'm yelling at face so much. He's like my favorite thing about that. You just rolled out, I don't know why I'm yelling at her, but... Same. I love face. So then they serve all these steaks and everything and everything's okay.

And she goes, Okay, all good in the hood. Which is I think the second time she said that might be like her thing that she does. Oh good, it's the hood. I think she's just... So older and so she hears things like that and things that she's been current, you know

I feel like she's a one calm type person, you know What is this a chocolate cake with raspberries and blueberries? This is the bomb so it's gone Okay, well I'm done some LT 5000 catch me my bunk So they all like it or whatever. And the chef is just tapping her tongs and grueling in the kitchen. And Lewis and Orianna are talking now because he's like trying to flirt with her,

but he's terrible at it. And she's in laundry. And he's like, oh, look at you in blacks. I haven't seen you because in black yet. She says, oh, you weren't awake last time. We were in blacks. And he's like, no, I guess not. But they look good. She's like, oh, God, Lewis reminds me of a sweet innocent English puppy. I mean, at least he's not a douchebag like most yoddies. But he could use some stilting. I'm not really wrong.

They too. I mean, listen, I'm not opposed to dating a short guy because when you're on still, they're all short. I'm on time, I write everyone you get over that real quickly. I'll just answer for my second question. So, I'm off to bed then. I'm just like, okay. Bye. Bye, good night Romeo.

Mm-hmm. And I was just like, well, I know you're American, but you definitely just had a very British exit. That whole standing and staring and then saying, up to bed. So it's Brits. So they, they're, they're upstairs. Everyone's toasting to love your bodies because they're sore.

And then they, they, they sometimes live at the birthday cake, so they bring the cake to the table. And Carrie tells does this anecdote. He goes, my 40th birthday was also on a yacht, but I was very keen. And fake guys. There you go, okay. Great. I know, first stories are a little odd.

You may have a separate story too, but phase like, just, just, phase, just, they're ready for the cake now. And just is like, all right, bringing up the cake. So she does, and then Vegas. Well, I've delivered, hopefully, perfect communication. I hope you're happy, Jess.

I was like, yeah, that's like what are you doing? Yeah. What are you supposed to do? Yeah, that's exactly what you're supposed to do. You weirdo. And honestly, okay, so I really like Jess too. But for as much as she's like, this is supposed to be pop star service, which is what I have.

Pivoty cooked eggs and octopus that's technically cooked as well. And as she serves up these two chocolate cakes that, they're kind of big saley. Let's be honest. I mean, I'm happy for them because after enduring weeks of Dave's Miracles, I'm below deck met. I'm like, this is a masterpiece. But let's be honest, this is not, I would say, a five star cake. Well, you know, I'm like it because it had berries on it.

So we all know the real reason. Well, there were being people towards Jess, okay? Well, the berries were also kind of like, it was like a nice cake, I'm sure it's delicious. It's actually really delicious. But I'm just saying, come on, we need to, like, let's bring the cake to work. Yeah, let's do this, Chef. I'm going to give shit to Dave.

I've got to give shit to Jeff. Yeah, I just think it must be Chef. So, like, I don't do this. I'm a savory chef, you know? But you're on a yacht. Yeah. You're going to have to do dessert every day. I was some kind, you know. So let's see, the captain comes up to join and the drunk guy is like, hey, captain, and

puts out his hand, the captain just sits down. He's like, you're going to just leave me hanging like that. Yeah. And so, and then meanwhile meanwhile up in the wheelhouse So Nathan and Kyler up there at like Nathan was like on anchor watch or whatever so Kyler has taken over and Nathan's like So you're gonna be up into the sun and it call goes till five o'clock So whenever the sun rises them in the suns out all day Like it's like a big disc Nathan just like yeah also we forgot to mention Nathan just keeps coming in and pooping and then leaving the poop in the toilet.

I'm leaving. I mean this guy's just such an asshole, right? So the captain is like sell it till so that the adventure. And the drunk guys like, well, you know, all of the staff, you know, the crew was great. All three of them just asked Casey. And I'm like, uh-oh. What? That's crazy.

And then one guy's like, yeah, like Kyle, you got to slow down Kyle. That's what we're gonna say. Right. And then the girls, I can't. Casey had to put up with it. So, Kerry's like, he's like just barely masking his rage. Like his eyes are like squinting,

and he's like turning red, and he has like this weird smile on his face. He's like, what do you mean? If I look strange, just the fact that I was struck by a lot and I'm not over to come with rage or anything like that, I'm your pal, tell me everything.

No one's gonna get in trouble. He's a shale friend. He's like well he was Trying to make out with her you were the same guy who was chanting kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss Yeah, you know, no, Kyle is the biggest asshole here, but still you these fucking got douchebags, you know So the lay one of the ladies is like guys come on and he's like or hot man We go to talk very serious yes and they're like uh oh he's mad they're absolutely and then there's like one guy don't worry about it.

Yeah shut up like that guy was like fake David Brianna's like stop all of a sudden you're gonna cover no and then the girl was like yeah it's just silly jokes. So then Keri's like I'm trying to keep my game face on, but inside, I'm on fire. It's a fire adventure on the inside. Never in my career in Yarding have I had to deal with crew acting inappropriately in front of guests. And now, or will get to the bottom of it. Don't, don't, don't.

So he calls Jess, oh no, so the chef is talking to Jess and Casey, I'm just gonna I want to tell you a joke. Okay, how do you call a cat? By its name. Okay, Fay, can you like give her a little right now. I mean, she's vague. No, you say, here kitty, kitty, kitty, here kitty, now how do you call a death cat? It's a bit too much for me. And you're like, hello, right now. Talk about the communication. It came on the bits wrong there, what was your thing? I was cracking up and face like, the fuck's fakes. It's not good.

So then Lewis and Michael are talking, and they're in their room going to bed. And Mike's like, I didn't even shower today, bro. He's like, you know, that's in the contract. What is? Crew showers once a day. He's like, am I fired? Well, it depends because I can see the other side of that is that one

doesn't always have to shower. Oh, you're doing the devil's ad if you get thing again. Oh, Colin, I am. So it's best time bedtime and these guest are playing charades upstairs. So that's where they're at. And Jess and Fay are talking and Fay's like, well, I just tried to put on my eye masks and look at my cell phone at the same time. That really works. So, but the best thing is now I understand you're played as a chef without a doubt. So are you saying you were having trouble with that communication. Don't damage, just leave me alone. You're kitty, kitty, here!

Why does anyone bring 100 gift cards onto this boat in the first place? We have a Shepard County, a cat's that count here. I mean, this is ridiculous. So then Rick is telling Casey, who is Rick? That's what I told you. He's like, hey guys, she's calling Casey Megow. Dude, shut up. Yeah, after he saw that they were gonna get into trouble,

he'd then just try to do it again. And so finally they go to sleep. But Casey is like, she's like working and Kyle comes from behind. He pulls the leak. He does like that From behind hug and she's like um Hey, uh, you're cold. You're a cold and he goes yeah, well guess what? I know people might think I'm a pig so I'm gonna say something that gay people will like

I grew up watching the golden girls probably I probably put probably put Casey as a blanch, you know, a little slitty one, like that fun and get loose, a real whore, a real fucking whore, my as well, Tiff the Blooders. You do not deserve to watch Golden Girls. I know. I felt like all the Golden Girls just rolled over in their graves, like every single one of them

at the same time, just like turned off every TV in America. Like if this person's gonna watch it, none of you are gonna watch it. How do you like that? Lange may have been a slut, but she was a slut on her own terms. Not because some guy crawled up from behind and was like, well, you're easy, I'm gonna have you.

Yeah, just what a fucking pig. Like trying to make it all sweet with the golden girl. He's like, that girl's a slut, so I'm gonna try and get some off of her. God, this guy's a fucking pig. Also, this is where I was like this. He's a real fan. Two shit face to even be on camera,

and I don't know why they're letting him film. Because if this were any other show, they'd be like, sir, your eyes are blazing red and teary, and you're, what are you, met the out? Like, what is this guy doing? And how is nobody stopping it? This is the thing with these shows that kind of pisses me off,

because it seems like they do this on purpose at this point, you know, and it's gross. I like it. So, yeah, sorry, what? Now, as you can say that, you know, if Casey is Blanche, what Nathan Pales realizes that he is like the disgusting character actor, who's on for one

episode and at the end of the episode, Blanche slammed the door in his face in the audience claps. Yes. Like Blanche's Empowering Moment and Faith, the one who sheltered her scutters. So yes. So then it's the morning and Orianna's in the galley and she's like, oh hi, orange shoes, oh hi, how are you? I'm talking to orange shoes isn't

that hilarious and chef jess is like just I please die slowly could you please just put a rag of your head and then let me slowly pull that orange juice down your throat I'm gonna orange juice can't say. Oh, you're hilarious. Knock, knock. Who's there? Orange juice. Orange juice what? Orange juice doesn't talk be quiet. So then the guys are working, the deck guys are working and the ink is lifting, the ink is lifting. And Lewis is like, nothing, we need you to inflate defenders if you feel like it. If you don't, please just let me know and I'll send a card to someone else and request their presence on the defenders. And Nathan's like, Lewis, for me, he's a very soft gentleman.

Like, can you do this for me? Can you do that for me? And some boasts walk around really happy to demand because I'm a high position. And I love the fact that he works with us. I was like, oh, I was, I thought he was starting off as an insult and then he brought it into a testimony. I was like, okay. So the cat was back in that. Kaisi Kaisi Kiri. Kaisi Kaisi Kiri.

Come to the bridge. I was like, um, hi. They shouldn't call it the wheelhouse. They should call it the doghouse because when you're going to the bridge, you're about to be thrown over a bridge. Okay, I'm really trying here. I'm a fun person. All right, Keri. Before we get back to our adventure, the guests made some comments about yesterday's adventure and possibly something happening on adventure.

It's only adventure that was inappropriate. K to talk about that. She's like, um, yeah, there was a little bit of flirting going on. Who was flirting? Did they get struck by lightning yet? And, well, it was Kyle. With who? Um, with me, obviously, because obviously you've called me up here. That's right. You passed the first test. Congratulations. Well, that's not acceptable. Were you uncomfortable, Kai? See? She's like, well, I mean, I took it, you know, and the guests were like, egg and kai'a'a'an.

I think it's just friendly on his side, and I was professional about it. It's like, well, that's not okay. And you shouldn't be put in that position. And we have standards on this vessel, okay? Like, what? Are you on the right show? Who cast you?

Thank God. Okay, then I started getting a little less pissed off at bravo I felt like now bravo is like okay, we're still gonna cast extremely problematic possibly dangerous people But we'll have somebody to call them out on their properly Yeah, listen we have standards on this vessel and it starts with having people who can swallow jellyfish on command. Okay? Listen, the guests want us to be part of their fun, but there's a line, call across the line, and a woman shouldn't be putting a position that's uncomfortable when doing stuff in front of people who get to struggle a lot in their own ways that makes it more

uncomfortable, and they're more likely to tolerate it because they don't want to make a scene. It's a horrible place to put someone almost as horrible as being in front of a bunch of small requirements and knowing you've got to run them, suck it, kept standing. Thank God someone understands this properly. And thank you for explaining it to the audience. I know it.

Okay. I know, I actually was, I was like, I was like, this guy is kind of great. I love that he was like very like, fuck this. I don't like this happening on my boat. I was very happy. So she's like, well she goes or anything I could do to help the situation He's like I'll take care of that. So then the guests are like oh my god. I don't want to leave Oh my god, so then

They're saying oh my god if you guys every time 40 is after front of the boat Like no, but I guess we need to before we leave 40 is after front of the boat. Like, no, but I guess we need to before we leave. But it's my party animals. So then Casey is asking Ariana if she needs help with glasses. And she's like, no, she says, do you want to help me do some glasses? And Ariana's like, I shouldn't be helping Casey.

Casey should be helping me because I was her boss. And I was hired to be second still, I think. I mean, I think I was. I might really share your in laundry all day, ma'am. So no, you weren't. Yeah. I mean, me and all the boat is like speeding through this fjord back to wherever they have to go.

They're poor and this lady goes, did the anchors come up already? Because I didn't hear them. No, they're just like driving pulling an anchor across the bottom of this view right now. And then it has to be up for us to move. You know, you ever heard about the definition of anchor? Yeah. So then the music is like, someone goes like warp speed cap and again, the music is like, dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun And here's a platter of bacon and a platter of eggs, bannodex, enjoy everyone. You know, it's a new show and you guys have to share each other's music

but below deck sailing was not the way because this is the sail music. You know, whenever they put up the sail, they're doing something. They're not just carrying up bacon. You don't have to put something to that music. I know. I mean, I understand they something. They're not just carrying up bacon. You don't have to put something to that music. I know. I mean, I understand they're trying to convey all the adventure of being on Blodic Adventure, but then when you like settle in on trays of ex-bentidics, it just doesn't quite like land

that like extreme vibe that they're going for. So then Oriana is looking around for 40s or something fun for them to do since they don't have 40s. So she's like, um, if anyone from the deck crew is free, could you meet me in the galley please? And she tells us, this is what you have to be good at. Finding out what the guests want and making it happen. I was in the circus. I was a stilt walker. That's pretty much what landed me here. Like what? I need more.

Her parents are never going out in public again. They will never be seen in Cambridge again. They're like, hey, Hans, you still want to go to that lecture tonight down at MIT? No, unfortunately, our daughter just admitted she went to the circus, so I think you should probably- They're literally protesting us at that lecture, okay? We cannot go. We have to burn all of your tweed blazers with shoulder- with elbow patches. Okay, we're just moving to a different

bar of the country. So, Orianna is now asking everyone, oh my god, guys, is there any deck stuff we can use to do a shot ski? And meanwhile, the guests are served all this breakfast, but there's no plates. And so they're like, uh, this, because Oriana's been looking for shotski materials instead of playing plates out on the table. And, you know, I mean, if there's someone who should be able to spin their plates and find a shot ski, it's the girl from the circus.

And we're right. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. She's gonna serve the plates on her to toes. Like literally like the plates that had come down on her toe, like search a soul, like, so phase, like,

we're a start with a five star five star service and people are paying thousands of dollars for amazing service. We don't have plates, I'm a nail. So, she's like mortified because she has to pull out the plates. So they're in the galley and it's like, I'm girls, I need to heal by behalf of food out there with my plates. And in case he's like, uh, I have a locked it.

I'm sorry, like, I mean, I don't know. I was like doing stuff and I forgot. Sorry. And Orianna goes, um, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. The chef just goes, oh, everyone's sorry. And then, and then the producers are asking, say, what, has she ever heard of like a shot ski?

A ski shot. But what do you really have to do? What is it, shots on a ski? Are you shooting someone with a ski on? Is that a Olympic event? Is that a thing? I don't know. I don't understand this thing.

And then she asked the producer, see what they are. It's a thing. Yeah, I've never been skiing. So I don't know. I don't know what they are? It's a thing. Yeah, I've never been skin No, I don't know what she's perplexed and horrified So then she still doesn't understand it by the end of like this interview They just happened to older. She's like goes home that day. She's like a shot and the ski a shot and a ski so let's see

A shot and a ski. So let's see, um, uh, the guests are talking and they're like, wow, that Kyle's sure fun, huh? He would probably be one of your best friends when you're 22. Would you still be friends with him now? And he's like, oh, that would probably be inappropriate. I'm 40. So. So then Kyle is like, um, I'm making the shot ski with a squeegee,

because I'm a pretty innovative person. Okay. Squeegee shot is one of my best. I mean, I'm not going to lie. It was a pretty decent workaround, but I'm not going to allow Kyle to call himself an innovative person. Okay, because you got cowboy tattooed on your arm. I mean, it's like, let's see. What was my creepy shot that I ever did

Oh, I once did a booty jig and went down the top of girl back and go straight into your mouth But don't worry. There's a peculiar there to protect it. So it's okay Unfortunately the girl had shot herself. So it was peep on the bikini So I guess it was pretty unhealthy, but it did kind of cure the jellyfish. I Gulped a few minutes later. So it comes up with a squeegee on. Shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, shove, so inappropriate behavior. Or, saying devil's advocate, you want to seem to me, perhaps, about some pretty good behavior. No, no time for that right now, okay? Carl's been flutin' with girls in front of the guests, and there's a time in a place for that. And I already can tell you're trying to devil's advocate me about that, that there is no time in a place,

but I'm telling you, there's a time in and a place and I don't want it. He's like, I need to keep him high out on that one. That struck one three times and you're a terrible boulder and also fired. Three times and you actually think you're the best. You're right. I'm looking to pay for them. Very sorry. Devils advocate. Devils advocate.

I would argue you're a good boulder. Just saying. Three strikes argue you're a good bowler. Just saying. Three strikes in your return. Do we happen to have a spare deck hand around? Two stonework on boats. Actually, just to play Devils advocate, I have seen quite an extra auto boat with some pretty smart vehicles on them. So then we just cut the cow going, so some life on the guest on the crew out. So goodbye. Good ridden. Get rid of him. We got a rough run of Kyle's this year. Goodness. Can we get a Kyle break for crying out loud? It's been so severe that it knocked Kyle from summer house to the top of the pack. I know. God from somewhere else has never looked better. By the way, I don't think

we mentioned this, but Coil for Blue Dick Med. He got engaged, not Frank, and there's a photo of him. I think we talked about him getting engaged, but there's now been a photo of him during the engagement, and a proposal. And it's the most Kyle photo that you can imagine. Him just like weeping. Like, oh, like not Frank, not Frank, I love you, I love you, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, deck. Thank you so much for being with us. We will be back every day. It's always and we'll be back with this next week. Thanks for everything. Talk to y'all later. Bye! Bye. Watch what crap ends with like to think it's premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King. Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney. Dana C. Dana Duh. She's not just a Sheila. She's a Daniella. Itchles. Aaron McNickalus. She don't miss no trickle-less.

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