Watch What Crappens - Below Deck Adventure: GOODBYE, KYLE!

Episode Date: November 17, 2022

The clown on Below Deck Adventure gets the ole heave ho after threatening another crew member, and we're just devastated about it. Also, Kacie changes her accent again, Oriana gets more obnoxious, and Chef Jess almost kills everyone with a rolling pin. This week's bonus is a trailer breakdown of RHOM season 5! Join Patreon at patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music,

or wherever you get your podcasts. I have cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cr Hello and welcome to Watch Your Crappins, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Madelker and joining me today is the one, the only Mr. Ronnie Kerram. Hi Ronnie, how are you? Well hello, Benini. Hi. Are you excited to talk about some below deck adventure today? Adventure!

Adventure! I sure am. I'm excited. I sure am. And I'll tell you before we start, we don't total right now on this bow. That's close for immediate termination. I'm actually, I'm in a weird place today. I'm not going to lie. I don't know how to deal with the idea of an asshole not failing

upwards on Bravo. I don't know how to feel about like someone doing something really heinous with all sorts of like like racially charged undertones to it and like getting fired right away. I'm not getting it spinoff. I'm like, is this am I what has Bravo jumped the shark? I know someone getting fired, but they actually deserve to be fired. Crazy. So weird. I don't even know to do like, should we still do this podcast? I don't know. I don't know.

I mean, shit will be fired by the end of this. Fair fireings on Bravo or here. Okay, we're out of here. Yeah, Captain Kerry, Captain Kerry, just laying this back down. Captain Kerry, I mean, our stern badass of Bravo is Captain Lee and Captain Kerry just made Captain Lee look like, you know, like a frog going up a wheelbarrow in the middle of a

hill storm. If you know what I'm saying, don't know what I'm saying. I look like a dick and a two-two at a tap dance competition when I was 13. God damn it! Captain Kerry just came in and just, I mean, I was shocked. He just came in and did that to Kyle. He was like, he's like, I'm gonna give you a subtle lashing and then a wolf-y. Like your reaction. Yeah, he's a strong little thumb. Strong, strong thumb.

Yeah. So it was amazing. So anyway, before we get into that, just a reminder that you can join us on patreon.com slash watch or crap ins. To get the full crap ins experience, if you support us depending on the level you support us at, you'll get access to our weekly bonus episode, you'll get access to crap ins on demand, which is when we turn our cameras on, you can watch us podcasting, you get access

to our Discord server and many other things. And by the way, big shout out to all our premium and super premium sponsors out there. Hey, of course, make sure you always listen to the end of the show where we give them all their big and much to serve shout outs. So yeah, come join us on Patreon. Our bonus episode last week was real doozy because Ronnie told a really amazing tale about a missing dog and his ring doorbell. And I'm just telling you, listen to it

because it's an amazing story. I'm gonna tell it again on the math, the math podcast. Can you believe that? I can't. Oh, that's the one you're excited. Yeah. That's amazing. On the math.

Because you know, it's very, I don't have a very good memory. So that just happened so I can just dig that one out. But yeah, I'm going to do the math in December. I'm super excited here in Austin. So all in out is like the day and the tickets and all that, but it's going to be at the Paramount here in Austin. So I'm super excited.

So come see it. That's fantastic. The Paramount's like a, that's like the big theater, right? Right there on Congress. Yeah. That's where we played in the state right right there on Congress. Yeah. That's where we played in the state side at the Paramount. Yeah. Well congratulations. I wish I could be there to see it but hopefully everyone who's around there can go and represent the Krapins Army for you right there.

Face timing you from the microphone. Be like, man. Here we go. It's the mouth. But today is below deck adventure. So let's just get right into this. This is called the Norwegian Tussle. I never knew that I didn't know how to spell Norwegian until this title. And I kept spelling it wrong. And I was like, how am I spelling this wrong? How are you still? R-W-I-E-G-I- N Norwegian on W wait a second. I'm a literal idiot. Okay, I'm like, I'm doing it. You know how we had to figure it out.

I was like, I'm going to figure this out. I'm going to just delete it and spell it again. Maybe it's because I didn't capitalize it, you know? Now, I'm just like insanely stupid. Wait, did you add the, did you say you added the eye after the W? I added them eye after the W. Yes. Nor I need. Ronnie, it is a team culture up in Norway.

There's no eye in Norwegian. They're the last part. It's after this. It's a last part. The last part, the point is you put the team first and then you come towards the end. Have you considered telling the story as the part of the moth also? I'm never leaving the moth, I'm just going to show up every day.

Hey guys, you know how to spell Norwegian? I don't. Let me tell you about it. Well, I've definitely learned how to spell things from below deck, but they also, by the way, they have a good number of typos that make it on screen too So you know for all you know, you never know you could have been spelling it right all this time But in this case you weren't but you know you don't know I would say I Appreciate you fumbling all over your damn self. I try and make me feel slightly better

But it's not like I don't know where I'm landing on this. I'm like wait I've learned so many things from the way they spell things, but they often get things wrong. So I shouldn't rely on them. Case closed. Oh, well, I'm an idiot. That's how we're opening. So it's a final day of Charter.

And we're cutting between Captain Kerry talking to Bozen, who for some reason I can't remember that his name is Lewis. Lewis. And Kyle, who is still doing squeegee shots, in who for some reason I can't remember that his name is Lewis. Lewis. Lewis. Kyle who is still doing squeegee shots, squeegee skis. What would you call those concepts? Like a squeegee.

Squeegee. Squeegee. Squeegee. Squeegee. But wouldn't it be a she-na? She-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she-she- Yeah, but it's called a shot ski, right? So you would have a shot and then the thing it's got a shot squeegee. That's what it is. Shot squeegee. Shot squeegee. Shot squeegee. Shot squeegee. I would do the full thing. Okay. I mean, it takes off the shot ski part. The syllables. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But I feel like a paint's a more accurate picture.

Yeah, yeah, but I feel like it paints a more accurate picture. You're choosing accuracy over a Slavic shot Squeeze I can't just squat shot squeeze. It's just like it gets hard. You start. I feel like the more I say shot Squeeze the closer I start saying shot squad. What about me? What about my squeegee? Coming up late at this week. So yeah, so he's doing those stupid shots. And every time they cut to him, he's just more of an ass.

It starts with him like, yes, some shots. And then it cuts to him going, and then it cuts to him being like, Hey, anybody know how to do an air guitar? Anybody know how to do a leg guitar? Air guitar on your leg? It's like an air guitar, but it's on your leg. Woohoo, yeah! I know.

Like then the next time we cut to him, he's just doing like a full on Kenny Chesney impersonation. My red solo cut, you're like, what is happening over there? So Captain Kerry is telling Lewis, he's like, coil, who's been flading with the ghouls in front of the geasts, and or won't have it. And then it cuts to Kyle like squee-ee squee-ee squee-ee squee-ee. Yeah, he's a disaster. By the way, I meant to say Toby Keith, not Kenny Chesney, I apologize to all the country fans who I accused Kenny Chesney of having a song about a red solo

cup. That of course was the luminary vision of Toby Keith, one of the gigamas and favorite musicians. Well, listen, check this is a Southern mirrors are in no, no place to complain today. I think all of us just have to be quiet and take what's coming to us. I self included. No. So, Kerry, uh, so no no we'll get there. No, don't be ridiculous. Don't be ridiculous. So the cat is like on YouTube to keep an old one him very closely

very, very close. Is he faking his accent? Because we've heard a lot of accents on this show. This is definitely the most robin Leechy of all of them. It's like the most crocodile dundee, I would say. Like I think he's like literally about to pull out a machete. He's like next time he does that to anyone say that it's not an off. This is an off. Yeah, I believe it. I wouldn't be shocked at that.

I'm asking if one day he came out and he was like, oh, thanks for having me on what's What's happened? I'm Andy. I love to be here That you have a lot of books on that shelf. Do you know all those off? Did you read all of those books? Wow You know, it's really been an honor first getting to play crocodile dundee and then to come back and be a yacht person But you know, I will say it's hard, you know, because I really enjoyed working with Linda Kuzwowski on Crack it out. But, you know, this new crew, they're good, they're good.

On Crack it out. Yeah, you know, he falls at Crack it out. Don't you hate when people abbreviate the projects they're on? We call it like that. Like, oh, well, I remember it was 1984, I was working on Crack it out. Linda Kuzwowski had just walked into out of a trailer and said, where is she easy knockout?

So the captain tells them to keep an eye on Kyle and so then the guest, the gross one, well, the grossest one is like, yeah, you know, wait, oh no, I wrote guy, I think me and you were that because I didn't know this is name at first. Oh, and for people who are pointing out that we were getting names wrong last week, of course, we are as bullay deck. Okay, it's going to take us two months to get this shit right. Yeah. Well, and on top of that, I'm sorry, of course, we can get everyone's names wrong because Nathan, Kyle looks like a Nathan, because he looks like Nathan from real world Seattle kind of. So Kyle looks like Nathan.

Nathan could be a Kyle. Lewis definitely looks like a Michael and Michael definitely looks like a Lewis. And Carrie, honestly, looks like a Peter and Casey looks like a Carrie. So like it's all a disaster. I Don't know who Peter is. I feel like Lewis looks like a Peter or a like He might do James. He looks like a James. James. Yeah, maybe that's because remember Lewis is too weird from It's not a weird name. It's just for him. I don't know. Why do I expect? He's not a Lewis. He's not a Lewis, right? Underfume made his not he really isn't a Lewis and I think the reason why he looks like a James is because of what we said last week

Which is that he's got pre James Gordon eyes like he's gonna grow into a James Gordon He's got a full James Gordon head to toe. I think coming up coming up on season five of below dick even job Just the post and yelling at the chef about egg yolks Yeah, like they've thrown his little sea monkey pellet into the water and by season five it's gonna grow into James Corden Disaster What a terrible hook. This season on below deck adventure. Welcome to the Uplosion James Corden.

Oh, I want all of you to sit down. I'm back to Carpool, karaoke with Gloria Stefan. Egg Yolks only, you stupid, stupid garbage person. So he's talking to Louis. He's saying, keep your eye on Kyle. And Louis is like, it's been said to me before, I need to be stricter, but I'd rather be nice than it absolutely bastard to it for because I didn't enjoy my first spell. It made me almost leave yachting. I need to find a balance. I was like, well, well, rewind. I don't give a shit about your balance.

Okay. Here's what I want to hear on your stories about your hair gel journey because it's intense. And I want to hear what happened on that boat. Yeah. I need to hear. Were you bullied? Oh, mm-hmm. Also, the most James Corden thing that he could say is, oh, I'd rather be nice to people than an absolute bastard to work for. Get me a new omelet. So get me a new omelet. So then let's see, he goes up to Kyle and he's like, what? Go ahead. No, you're right, you're right. I get a little shuffled here because the way I was rewinding, it seemed to kind of shuffle

the scenes. So in the beginning, I'm a little shuffled. It's okay. We're gonna give you some shuffle space. No it was it was weird and also honestly the version that I was watching the screener that I was watching was having some playback issues so sometimes I press play and it actually moved forward. Oh my god. Thank you. And it was happening to me too. That's what I'm talking about. Yeah. And then I would type the scene.

I'm like, wait, but how am I like 13 minutes into this? You know, so I would go back and I learned you have to press the rewind six times. And then it got me back to where I was. That's the magic number for me. How about you? Yeah. It was about that too. But like clearly, it's not that you were shuffled, is that you

were presented shuffled content. So it's not your fault. It's not your fault, Rodney. It's not your fault. I'd rather take the blame for shuffling the content incorrectly than being bastard to those who actually did it. So, yeah, no. So the guests are going to be leaving. So then, then we, well, you skipped over a very important scene. This is what I'm trying to say here, which is that we're now in the galley and Fey walks in and she's like, do you know if we have any stain-remeeting spray? And then Casey's like, I'm not sure. And then there's like a clunk and Casey casts and they turn around and a rolling pin has fallen off of who knows what because we didn't see where the rolling pin came from a where it fell from

But they're like that's good of killed me a rolling pin and like that is so below deck to have a big heavy rolling pin Just dangling from the ceiling on those marble. Yeah, one of those fucking marble ones and then just just fast drives like death by rolling pin. Yeah, something that happens These things happen stupid Americans I'm not American, but you might as well be Facially you are that's all the count Get back to it Beverly Degriface Hello You see syllables matter Beverly Degriface. Hello. You see syllables matter, Beverly Degriface

Joe. No, Beverly, Beverly, Beverly Degriface. Beverly Dange Griffith. Melanie D'Angelo. Much easier. Yeah, there's much easier here. So then Kyle is finally talking to Lewis and Lewis is like, well, I just want you to know the captains not happy. I need you on board. So please keep the captain happy. Be professional as you can. And then Kyle tells us, I don't mean to trouble, but I find it. Once we were stranded on this bus that attract me, saw it took over the bus and I started driving to the random parking lot. I just love being that country boy. Wow crazy. Let's get it. Yee-hee top. Yes, my bad. It's my bad. Yee-hee. Let's get it. What the hell is wrong with this person? Taking off this wrong bus driver too. You're stranded. Doesn't that mean your bus is broken down? Another kind of stranded. Like yeah, exactly. Yeah, where what happened? Where did they get stranded?

Who like what what missing track stars are there? Who do they have to eat to survive? I don't know. I just sounds crazy. I don't understand this. Well, that's just the country boy and me. I'm like, so as being a country boy, I mean like you're like a crazy person. I reject this. I reject this. It's terribly offensive to anybody, especially any Texan watching this,

like now listen, I'm not saying these types aren't around. Okay? Mm-hmm. Like stereotypes exist for a reason. But come on Kyle Kyle do better. I think we also have home goods. You know what I mean? Featuring Luke Serip.

But the thing that's funny is I feel like Kyle is the type that would call someone like me like oh, Jason pussy, CD board doesn't know the real meaning of life. And it's like, well, but you're saying you're a country boy who got stranded and a bus and then decided to do it, doing that with the bus and the parking lot. I was like, wait, why is that a better alternative to me being a pussy city boy? You're both wrong, okay, Kyle and Ben.

You're probably, I'm just saying, I just love when people say things like that. Oh, stupid, city, dweller. You know what I do? I once got, I got wasted and I jerked off in the, I've knocked a plus and I'm real off an edge. Cause that's just the country boy in me. I'm like, wait, that's supposed to be like somehow better than me

being like an abject pussy from the city. Yeah, I feel like he would like, call me the F word, but then also ask for a blowjob drunk at the end of the night. Uh, yes. A hundred percent. Yes. And I would do it because I'm that kind of drunk. It's really hot.

I don't know if it's a good hot day. Yeah, you're just a country boy. That's what you do. You go like skit, skit, skit, vaps. Yeah. So, so then Lewis, what a worst Lewis. I cannot stress enough what a worst this guy is. So he's like, he's like a cityweeler.

He's a what? He's like a cityweller. I know, read a book. Read a book, why don't you go back to reading your books? Hey, I know one thing he's got in his pocket. Bookmark, mark, mark, mark. Enjoy reading your books at a Starbucks. Next to the queers enjoy voting

Enjoy subwise, I don't need to sing which is So Lewis is like that but we mean you I need to pick a lead a cat soon Hmm and draw the obvious choice. I mean, look at you, yeah, look at me. He's like, you need to set a good example, though. And all we need to do is iron out the kinks. Iron out the kinks, what do I look like? It's, hey, the man, hey, the man, hey, the man, see.

I don't do none of those kinks no matter what, anyway. Okay, I like my sexy old fashioned way, with a horse or with a lady. So Lewis is like, you know, I'm just dangling the carrots. That way, Kyle would be a little bit more professional. I'm like Lewis, he does not respond to dangling carrots. It would have to be a jellyfish.

Yeah, he's probably eating carrots. It's probably like damn vegan. I know. By the way, what about Kyle makes him the obvious choice because he like understands what an anchor is. Kyle is actually like, he is the one who has puffed up his own knowledge, but we haven't actually seen that he knows significantly more than everyone else. He just talks like he does. He's like, hey, they don't know what they're doing. Like, it took them 10 minutes to talk about an anchor, but I know how to talk about an anchor in two

minutes. And it's like, that doesn't make you qualified. Right. Because I think Lewis is kind of one of those soft guys who just, I mean, I guess the modern term for it, I'm embarrassed to say it, but he's a beta. Okay, he's like, one of those guys is just waiting for like the popular aggressive person to like him.

You know, and he's gonna do whatever he can to whoever's the most aggressive, or for whoever's most aggressive, to be well liked by like the, you know, the stereotypical man. I don't understand this concept whatsoever, Ronnie. I've never had any life experience like this. He stopped.

Oh. I'm on with this. Why it? I'm unfamiliar. I'm unfamiliar with this concept of being a beta. Um, I love you. The only way you're a beta is that you are fabulous like in your draperies. You're, are you gonna prepare for the baby?

The fish are you going to be a baby fish? Beta fish is spelled differently than beta like beta person. Beta fish. Not in my mind. Hey, did you hear how it spelled Norwegian? Hi. Hi, that's just the country in me. I spelled beta fish with one tea.

Yeah. I'm talking about the Nort YGN. There's no Aughton beta and that one I have spell checked. 13 players, those beta fish. Fabulous, fabulous beta fish. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crap and scum. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life.

But come on, someday's parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful take on parenting. Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brownleur, we will be your resident not-so-expert-experts. Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding, and thinking, oh yeah, I have absolutely been there. We'll talk about what went right and wrong, what would we do differently? And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone. So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the

world, listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. So anyway, this is where Lewis is like, he's like, yeah, it's like I want to hang, I want to take a little carrot to make Kyle more professional and they got like, this is where Kyle is now holding the squeegee, formally used to hold shots, and he's holding it like a rifle, and he's just shooting at imaginary things off the side of the boat. He's pretending to shoot ducks off the side of the boat. You know that game that used to be in the arcade, like Duck Hunter.

Duck Hunter? Whenever it was duck hunt. Oh, yeah, there's like the modern version, but like Deccon does my go. It's like a machine gun. That's stupid dog. Oh. Another one you're talking about is not Deccon.

The one you're talking about is the one where you go. That's the one that's like, I feel like it's a little too aggressive for Dave and Buster's, because everything at Dave and Buster's is like, Mega Man and see the Mario Smash and like, Silly Dis this alien invasion and Kill the duck with this realistic Wow Kill that deer and

Carls the guy in the David investors playing way too hard duck hunt, you know, you're like oh my god calm down It's duck hunt. He's like take it motherfucker. Yeah I'll tell you what game he's not playing at Dave and Busters. Trivia. So, boy. So, um, that's for city people only. With our books and our ivory towers. But is there more trivial pursuit than duck hunt? That's the thing called

that throw moment. That's me doing the music when you miss the duck and the dog laughs at you. And over again. Oh, so yeah, he's playing duck hunt off the side and guys like, yeah, I know my flaws. It's on just me. That's the thing, on just me. I know my flaws is I'm just me that that's the thing I'm just me With this little be this face and Lewis is like well, currently I wouldn't make how to lead the can but yeah, you know dinkle that carrot And it's like he just needs to calm down a little and then girls like y'all ever seen like the tar, you ever seen it? From the people who brought you about Tommy by the who it's now dummy by the what?

So the sorry everyone I apologize. So, um, Tommy, who's, who's, I know. Who's Tommy? Oh, so you can, so you can put an eye in Norwegian, but I can't reverse Tommy is the which makes a portion of sense. I don't need to spell. I'm gonna start Tommy That's a little bit more wizard But then on top of that while he's doing his guitar solo the one that guest goes Hey, do you think you can kick that canopy? There's like a canopy that's like overhead, like it's like nine feet above them. He's like, I'm gonna try, and he tries to kick, he tries to do like a big kick to kick the canopy

that he clearly cannot reach. I'm like, what are you trying to do? What is wrong with you? And Lewis just sees him in size. And cause I just fought my hand with you everybody. I fought my hand with you. So then we go to Mike who's still there somehow. And he's like, me being green and Nathan being green, I'm just like, I'm a little nervous

to dock. You know, I just hope it works out and I don't make mistakes. Okay, well thanks for stopping by Mike. Yeah. It's all I need to hear until the end of this episode. Can't wait for the dead can't who's actually like, oh, can't wait to dock, should be a breeze, do this all the time.

Can't wait for the stalking time, we're doing it. They're also petrified. So then meanwhile, Casey and Ariana are downstairs and they're sort of sorting out their epilets, which are the things on their shoulders, the stripes and everything. And I think that Casey gives Ariana an epilot that's just like a single stripe, those stripes and everything. And I think that like Casey gives Orianna an epilogue that's just like a single stripe, which is below her.

And so Orianna's like, Casey's like, oh, here are your epilogue epilogue epilogue, but in her like fake fucking accent. But my boat contract says I'm supposed to be a second stew and that there were supposed to be some stilts for me. And my epilogue only have one stripe. So there's clearly some miscommunication. Yeah, I've only got like a one stilt on each arm,

which is a problem. That's a problem. Yeah, they only gave me those like little bucket stilts, you know, where it's just like little, little pales with straps, but I- Practice stilts. I'm actually contractually obligated to have full stilts.

Trim or stilts? Full of Renaissance fair stilts. Case, your stilts. Full of Renaissance spares stilts. Case, okay. So Orianna does this thing. Okay, I just don't like her right away, right? Like she's just one of those. I'm like shut up. But here's why I think she does the thing

where she straightens up her head. Like she straightens her neck. I'm like kind of points her chin down and then shakes her head really fast. Like a bird who got a droplet of water on its head, that's how she talks, it makes me crazy. So we're like, okay, so I'm supposed to have two stripes but then this girl with her fake accent,

blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, we have to do a video at least once of a low deck adventure so I can do it because I literally stopped a TV and started doing it, like a little parakeet shaking water off of it's head. I mean, that sounds adorable to be honest. I think that but I totally see what you're saying. We'll do a video next week. How about that?

Okay. Thanks. It'll be an adventure video. A video. A video. A video. A video. Um, uh, I never had a sister. I have a sister in Moul, but I did not grow up with a sister.

And so, but I'm definitely getting sister. I have a sister in Moul, but I did not grow up with a sister. And so, but I'm definitely getting sister vibes from her. I feel like, is she like the typical younger sister or the middle sister who's like very frustrated by things so she runs off to the circus and then complains about everyone around her? Is that what sisters do? Is that what sisters do?

I'm getting like a Diane Chambers vibe from her from Cheers, where she's like working in the same bars everybody else, but she's acting as Snotty, you know? That's the vibe I get from her. Not expecting that, but I love that, especially since she is from the Boston area, I just became rich, so that really works out well. Oh yeah, there you go.

Where everyone forgets your name. So then the captain is telling the boys, you know, telling them to do long, starting to do lines, and make say, I'm not sure if I'm okay, okay, that's enough for me, Mike. Nothing else till the end of the recap. Or I don't steam free. Listen, this takes a higher when you're talking, new crew, new boat, new Marena, new environment, new rolling pin, because the old one fell off, new sheet pan, it burned. New sticks. You found them.

Your walls go back inside, parakeet dead. New letter, new letter I in the word Norwegian. If they don't do that, you'll probably, oh, I look like a clam. I was in the circuit. Go back in the saw up here, kid. I can speak with authority about what looks like a clown. I don't want to hear it's still face. So still face. Also I love that we have two people from circuses in this edition of below deck.

I think that's the first. We've got the still walker, Orianna, and then we've got, yeah, I wanted to be a bull ride. I didn't become of the clan. And then we see a picture of the guy on the rodeo clam. Honestly, we just needed Liam Lachin in the galley or something, but like an I worked in a corn vulture together. We make rodeo carny and rodeo carny and circus. I may be a carny kid, but don't play games with me. One of the best housewives lines of all time.

All time. So the guests were like, wow, that guy used to squeege a shot. That was amazing. That's so creative. Another using that same squeegee to clear the dark. Well, that's effort. Make out with a, make out with Katie. Yeah.

Hey, Pink Casey into a corner,. Make out with KC. Yeah. Hey, Pincasey into a corner. Sick. It's hung down the throne. Yeah. And then there is this weird moment where Nathan, Nathan, and they're all like changed into their whites and everything. And so Nathan is near Faye. And she's like, and he says, Oh, you know, you look really good in your uniform. She's, Oh, it looks at you. With your cold on, you're like Mr. T. Like, like literally looks nothing like Mr. T except that he has a piece of gold jewelry on and he's black. Gold tape, you're lucky Kyle's here, ma'am.

You're lucky Kyle's here. That would have gone over. It's like Barack Obama over here. I'm not, you're not like me. We're crying out loud. The low deck is really like walking through landmines, you know, every single addition. So Kyle watches on annoyed. He's like, oh, look at him talking to her.

Yeah, I think he's so great talking to somebody. So then Oriana is liking up a suitcase with Casey. And she's like, shouldn't the boy's be doing this? So she's in the boy's be doing this. And she's like, you can't do it better. Stop complaining, you've already missed about 12 hours of work, you. So then they're approaching the port. And Carrie comes and he's like,

he's like honking so hard. He's like literally the only boats in this port that's like some robots, there's maybe a tugboat, and he's acting like he's coming into Monte Carlo or he's honking the horns, clear all the yachts out of the way. I'm like, this is a fishing town. You're not even supposed to be here right now. And whether the guest is like,

why is he honking it? The other guest is like, yeah, he said he was gonna practice. So, I guess this is his practice day with the horn. Is it working? It's working. Buh-buh! The working now. It was always working, sir.

It was poor Norwegians. They're like, we're just trying to be cute over here on land and you're ruining it. So, yeah, they're approaching, but as they approach the dock, all of a sudden, huge issue, the power goes out. It's the boat's malfunctioning. So are they just buying all these boats off Craigslist? Where are these boats coming from? I know, ever since Blood Dexailing, they're like, wait a second, it's a matter of we have shitty boats.

That's not the butt crash end of the dock every year. Yeah, I know for crying out loud, it's the every season now, the boat loses power. So because they, if we have to have an engine failure, the deck hands have to kind of do it with the people who are on the dock. So it's like a lot of, a lot of hand-amollonium carries like, I need someone decandal in the bay. Run, run, run, all I need, someone to run, hurry up, all right. So they're like throwing a lot of lines and there's a lot,

there's like throwing and throwing and at one point, like there's like a splash because Nathan threw a line, but it landed in the water, which is the biggest no-no for decans for reasons we're still not fully aware of. I guess we can get time to rush. Well, yeah, but people was like, I'm so embarrassed. I didn't get it to the dock. I'm like, it's fine. Just do it again.

Oh, yeah, no. I was like, I'm so embarrassed. I didn't get it to the dock. I'm like, it's fine, just do it again. Oh, yeah, no. So, yeah, it's this very embarrassing. I'm totally, as someone who can't throw or catch, I totally get it. And every time I see them gearing up to do that rope, I'm like, ooh, you know, it's like if you ever throw keys at me,

I just freeze. I'm like, he kind of hits my boob and just falls to the ground. And then I start sweating because I'm so embarrassed. Yeah, I'm like, why why didn't you even try? Like most people have reflexes. I'm like, I don't have reflexes. I know, I throw my hand up. I do this weird thing like to catch a keys where I turn away,

but I put my hand up, hoping that like it just lands in my palm and I clutch all at once. I can't even like try to juggle. Have you ever tried to learn to juggle? Like I throw something up and then I just freeze and like it's me in the head, like I can't even, I can't even like try to juggle. Have you ever tried to learn to juggle like I throw something up and then I just freeze and like it's me in the head like I can't. I look, juggling, I don't understand how people do it. Yeah, I, yeah, terrible. So the captain's like, yeah, long, it's the longest of the most important thing.

And if somebody doesn't get that long close, I'm long on my crew to get that long across. And then we hear splash and cause like, oh, come on man, don't throw it like that. What the hell's wrong with you? Give me, give me to, and that give to me, Nathan. Just give it to me. God, get out of here, Nathan. And he tells us, Nathan, just don't get it. And Nathan's like, you could have let me do it.

You don't have to rush me like that. And he's like, it is a rush, boo. Okay, we don't have an engine. Okay, boo. Yeah, he's being totally condescending, you know? Like, and just the way he talks about Nathan, he's like, Nathan, just don condescending, you know? And just the way he talks about Nathan, he's like, Nathan, just don't get it. He talks as if Nathan is some derelict

who's not paying attention and doesn't want to pay attention and is doing the bare minimum. And all he does, he just didn't get it. He didn't throw it as far as it needed to be. And he's being just a total asshole. Yeah, he's a monster. He's a monster, this guy. So then Kyle takes the rope and he throws it across

and it makes it. And so the captain's like, good job everybody. Make me proud. When you're right, you'll see the boat of Madonna, of super pop star of the 80s and beyond. Welcome to Life Stars of the Rit and Fimal. So they everyone is the other all-darked and then Captain Carrier tells us that Dawking was the absolute mayhem but it gave me so much faith in my goal, especially Carl. What could possibly go wrong here. So so then this guy

Tony the chief engineer, so we didn't get the whole like this is Tony and this is Ronnie, you know, like they didn't give by the way, I just made you one of the the chief engineers. But I imagine we would have crashed definitely. So that we'd be like't have you tried hitting the engine. That's all you have to be is a broken hit it. I got a good. You're just putting a ring doorbell in the bridge, just telling what to do from New York. But the end here comes up and he's like, wouldn't Martini came loose? And I'm like, oh my god, this is a drama. Yeah, the Martini go get the Martini back. Well, yeah, apparently a thing fell off.

And so he put it back on and he put some thread fastener something he fixed it. He basically fixed the piece that fell off of the yacht. That cost the entire yacht to stop working. So, um, yeah, he fixed it like a shower head. He's like, I just put some of that screw tape on there. I was like, yes, engineer. So then it's goodbye time. And the guests like, hey, thanks for everything, dudes. This was like, the best guy I wish we could be having a drink right now. I'm

going to drink him a hand with Kyle. God damn it. I love you. Kyle. And like, comps, Kyle's like another. Yeah, he gets a great man. Yeah. Yeah, he gives Kyle a very long kiss on the cheek. And then Captain Kerry says that guy at a primer, he's like, well, you know, it's Hold Forrest because you're a favorite child of guess. And he goes, huh, try to number one. Get it. I get it. I guess, yes, yes, sir.

Yes, that's the point. That was the point. You're just in good dad joke on the dad. So they leave. And then Orianna, we just, you know, everyone starts cleaning and getting ready for the tip, meaning whatever. And he's just got story on that.

And she's like, yeah, I'm pretty nervous to sleep because like, I don't want my stomach to start hurting. It's like, oh, this fucking lady, the whole time she's going to be doing this, the whole freaking season I guarantee you she's one of those. Yeah, she will be. And then Kyle is like, God, so now Kyle is talking to Lewis. So here's another reason why I really don't like Kyle because he is such an underminer. Like he always is running to authority to complain about Nathan. And so if I even hear about Kyle being mad that Nathan went to the captain about any of this stuff I'm gonna be like sir You're the one who have actually been Tattling on Nathan for the past two episodes and so he says he's like God

Nathan is such an attitude person bro and Lewis is like attitude. I think he's just nervous It's like no, it's an insecurity and he definitely didn't make it that he even lied when we lost it I mean I took and I was like bro give it to me But he was like bitching at me for mean, I took and I was like, bro, give it to me, but he was like, bitch, you know, at me for taking it from him. And I'm like, bro, we don't have any engines. Just drop her ego, bro. Yeah. I'm Lewis is like, well, who can't use to it? He's like, well, he will, but for fuck's sacks, man, for fuck's sacks. Yeah. Under mine. So then we go to a meeting and Kyle, who's, you know, clearly troubled. He's like, champagne. Yeah, champagne. So then

they all get their little cheers in. And they're sick. They're sick. They're poor for Kyle and they give him the glass. Oh, I got the big head. Huh? It's my personality perfectly. It just cuts, it just cuts to Jess and Nathan glaring at him just like this piece of trash rolling pin should have fallen on his head Well, no, I never accused the rolling pin of having decent aim The captain's like right first child. I appreciate the food with limited supplies shift now boasting I lost my engine But everyone did their job perfectly there for that one and for you had a stressful interior Fantastic job there. I know there's been some issues on the boat some people saw this is their vacation This is a guest vacation not yours. I was like that's it

That's all you're gonna say after After that harassment and the cave, I need more sir. Yeah. And so then he tells us, all right, now it's time to let's take off the training wheels. The first shot is down. We're gonna take off the training wheels. You get to use the excuse to knee-crew on the boat one time. Okay.

So now everyone look at the big brick on the table. It's a nice table, right? Huh? Well guess what is $20,000? Yeah, go at it all right So my favorite part of the show claiming dance music Yeah Some people wiping things down and then Nathan and Microtocking and Nathan's like So what's the life like man and Mike's like, so what's the love life like, man?

And Mike's like, last time I had a relationship with him in high school, I really enjoy being single. Like, why not, am I right? And he's like, well, you ever heard the saying, I belong to the streets. I belong to the streets. Mike, what? The bus to tea down there.

The bus to tea I gave them. Ha ha ha ha ha. Do do do do do do do do not that show. Now that show. There is no I in team but there is me. So so they are all getting ready. They're getting dressed up for dinner and phase like put on a whole black outfit.

So call us. Fine my God girl. I wish I was dead because you're coming to my funeral. Shit! I'm like, well, I know you were trying to give a compliment, but you realize that you're saying, God, you're so hot

that when I'm dead, I hope you come to my funeral where I won't be able to look at you because I'll be dead. But I guess other people will be able to look at you and then that people will be like, wow, he knew a hot person. Don't try to make sense of Kyle. I mean, he's just dumb as a can of ear.

And he's like, you're gonna come to my office also the day that he gets fired, which I thought was funny. Well, the episode where he gets fired. So he's like, oh, look, shit's all in white. We got the message about the world here. Yeah, I don't know if I want to see him or go to heaven. Some jasses like, well, I know one thing we can agree on. We want you both to die right now. So then they go out and they're walking around to the marina. They're like, oh my god,

isn't it so pretty? And someone's like, didn't it remind you of Hogwarts? Lewis ain't that your school? Let me remind you a Hogwarts Lewis ain't that your school. Lewis, yeah, I am. Lewis is like, I don't know what you're talking about. I want an omelet with all your plays. So then, that should be a huffle puff. Don't freak it this. The sorting hat is here and it sorted me out in all yoke omelet. It's time for commercial.

It's time for a crapence commercial. So then we get a shot of something very weird, the captain on the phone with his significant other. Does not happen very often on this show. I know. I'm like, what happened to your child in Florida or the Philippines? I know. At first I was like, wow, he's really got a grown up child, but it's the same.

And Gunul and he's like, oh, I've been seeing my girlfriend, Gunul for about a year. We worked together a quarter a few years ago. She was chiefs too. And she quit after a few months because she didn't like our around a boat. Yeah, to be there, a few years later, a few years later after we got divorced, we reconnected and of course the reconnection had nothing to do with the divorce, nothing at all, and eventually she opened up and she helped me be a better person in and that's pretty special. She'll make me a beta piece in. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Yeah. So reading between the lines,

you cheated on your first boat. So she left and then you finally got it up to get a divorce and called her. That's what I'm hearing. That's how I kind of understand the scandal-ridden world. So I'm always hearing scandal and everything. But he's like, she makes me a bit of person. Guess what? Sounds exhausting. I know. How about you just come as a good person, everybody? That's what I always say. So not the HGTV of relationships. It's not the my lottery dream home of relationships. Yeah, come on. The lottery when you want to spend. Come on, spend more of that money.

You're fine. I always see $1200,000. I found a house for $5 million. You should do it. Your family can help. My mom recently announced that she really likes him. I was like, Mom, what do you like that guy? She's, no, he's very sweet to them.

Because you know, you can see some of them that, you know, like they don't know what to do with their money and he's, you know, they're sweet to them. You know, and I'm like, what are you talking about, mom? He wants them to spend all their money on the house and lose everything. Yeah, he wants them to go over every time and they're not even cute houses.

So then we're at the restaurant with everybody and as they walk towards the restaurant, they see like yachts with tables set out and he's like, oh, why is so cool. They got restaurants on boats and shit. Do you know what you work on? Do you know? Are you aware that you were basically working on a floating restaurant with beds? So so they they they go inside to this bar and Kyle's wearing like his sunglasses inside and They're in there and they're just like talking to him and asking like if you can ride a mechanical bull He's like, yeah, I can ride a mechanical bull. Yeah, cuz I used to be a rodeo clown

I have my own barrel and everything I can write a mechanical bull. Yeah, because I used to be a rodeo clown. I had my own barrel and everything. I had to distract the bull. And, you know, and then his, his sob story, my mom was a professional barrel racer, traveling rodeo to rodeo, riding on horses and one horse. She got some lady accused her of stealing it. And that was a long trial and he and out of jail

for some lady's white lie. That causes to have a lot of problems and may be in a loan. It was too tough. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait,

wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, It was her. It was her. It's not a white light. Your mother stole a horse. Okay. What sort of de Kenzie and stories are you trying to weave here? Just a little boy in his own barrel. He literally has his own barrel. I got my own barrel. Is a little boy in his own barrel and his mom has a horse and they

get some mishavish. I'm accuses his mom of stealing a horse. I based on the way Kyle turned out, I'm going to side with the lady. The lady who accused his mom of stealing the horse. Yeah, you're like, I don't even know who this lady is,, I'm going to side with the lady, the lady who accused his mom of stealing the horse. Yeah, you're like, I don't even know who this lady is, but I'm on her side. Here's what I think happened, reading between the lines. I think Kyle stole this lady's horse.

And then the mom's like, how would you get that horse? And he's like, I just wanted it a barrel, a barrel contest. And she was like, give me that horse. We're returning that horse. And then the lady sent the police over and the mom was on it about to return it. And then she got arrested. She wouldn't ever admit that Kyle was really the one who stole it in the first place. Wow. The mother, that's like, that's real dedication. I think that's I think there's actually probably, there's probably some truth to that. That's very sad story.

Yeah, it's a soundstree, so everybody spread it. So Kyle is like, hey guys, yeah, look, I got a picture on my phone, I got a picture on my phone. It's me, two years old. And they show him as a little kid. He's, you know, of course adorable, because he's two. And he's like, what is he like sitting on a saddle or something?

And Lewis is like, oh, well, that's fascinating. I want to go square dancing in Texas. Take me to the dirtiest bar with your mates and I'll say, I'll have Rose. He he he. Again, really supporting our James Gordon theory, really, really supporting it. So then, Orianna, Orianna's been talking about Lewis,

because she's sort of eyeing him, but she tells us, you know, Lewis is generally not my type at all. He's almost tall. What? What? What? Which, I like that characterization

of someone who's almost tall. It's like, it's almost tall. But I do like British accent. No. And so the waiter, by the way, is hilarious. He's so good. He's like, welcome. Welcome.

Would you like to look over the specials? Or would you like me to tell you? We have halibut, halibut. It's very good. And it's gluten- for your chefy chef. You want some halibut gluten free? I loved him. Yeah, he was like a young Tim Curry.

You know, like a young Tim Curry, if Tim Curry's career went towards being like a waiter, or Tim Curry, if you were like on the progressive commercials, you know? Yeah, I loved him. Talk about commanding a table. And they always tell you, you know, you have to know how to command the table is a waiter. That's how to do it. He's like, hello, he is what we'd like,

what you'd like to hear it or what you'd like to read it. He's like, yes. And he was all excited. He had a whole spiel in Colorado. He's like, well, we do have a whole machine. And then he's like, I'll have some risky got we're ski He's like, yes, it's fine. I'm gonna do a whole thing with Co-ordinated service of pouring the gin on it once, but that's fine So then they start asking Casey where she's from and Casey's like on from sea at Oom and Mike's like I thought she said you were British or something. She goes, no, no, I didn't say I was British. Yeah, you said she was British because she has the British accent.

He's like, no, I didn't. I said, is she British, but she is British, right? Is she British? Somebody asked her right now. Ask the waiter if he can get me inside of is she British? Just point out the asker. And she's like, well, I don't really consider myself American, but my family relocated to Costa Rica.

And we've been there for 10 years. And I also have my Finnish citizenship. And Kyle's like, and I had you finish your citizenship. I didn't know something that could be started in the for-I thought you just have it. No, it's my Finnish citizenship. So it's over, you're not a citizen anymore. Are you just like an alien anywhere?

It's Finnish. I'm from Finland Finland. Okay, so that's a place where you bought fish She's like my father was born in Finland and my mother is Mexican and Dutch I'm like a true Matt about I kind of dig up though because I don't want people to just categorize me as a typical Mara-Card. You know, I'm a nomad and I don't know where I'm from. You don't know where I'm from. And so that's like how it goes. And so, Orianna's like, well, I hired her on my boat.

So I hired her. And, you know, having a fake accent, you didn't have three years ago. It's kind of sketchy. Okay. That's a little bit. Yeah. Yeah. Orianna is going off on KC and her confessionals,

being like, yeah, that's sketchy. She's sketchy, whatever this is. And then it cuts to her, cheers. And you're gonna be like, cheers, love you, love you, like she's so fake. Yeah. And so then there, you know, cheers to team Mercury and Kyle's like, Mazel tov, Shabbat Shalom, Ha, Shabbat Shalom, La Ha, Saba, La Ha, La Ha, whatever.

Woo, yeah, that's what I say. Ha, Shalom and La Ha vibes. You know what I'm saying? Whiskey, yeah. And everyone just looks at him like, not now. So then Lewis sneezes in his shirt, like he does that thing where you like, put the shirt over your nose and sneeze onto your chest

and he goes, what's he's going on with me? I'm a luchick to land. Anyway, and Orianna, who you know is allergic to everything. He's like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, I don't really have to climb. Yeah, and I'm on stilts anyway, so it's not like you have to climb me. I can't wait to descend on him like an escalator to the subway. So, Orianna's like, she's like,

I've never been like, oh, that guy's cute. Like, let me get him. I like, I would like to learn that. I would like to know how to do that. It's like, well, you could stop by trying to stick your head under his shirt where he just sneezed and giggling. So the chef's like, oh, it's so nice to have someone cook me a meal for a change.

And now Kyle is onto gigantic martinis. And she's like, oh my God, the seventh dirty martini for this one, he's like, should be my 17. Yeah. Falls all over. He spills it all over the table. Yeah, and Nathan just sees this and Nathan's like, um, he basically says, oh, I'm not feeling well. I'm gonna go back to the yacht. So he he goes back. But he's like, you know, Kyle is shown that he can be super aggressive. So I'm not hanging out for this drunk cowboy to start brawling. I'm out of here.

So he is smart. He sees where this is going and he's like, whatever. I'm going back back to the yacht. Yeah, I mean, he's like, he's treating me like this sober. He's going to totally be looking for me in a couple of seconds, you know, he's trying to make sure that's exactly right. Yep. So Kyle's like, well, I like to start my whole does my absolutely fucking

nobody. Am I like very classy? Very Texas. I'm like, God, just hated. I feel my property values going down like every five minutes on a show. So then they just had to go to a bar called milk. So they walk over and call, call goes, what up milk about to take, about to make this place absolutely lactose intolerant.

I'm like, what does that mean? You're going to like be so awful that everyone's gonna leave because they can no longer tolerate being in milk. He's such an idiot. Oh, everybody's mortified, you know? Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, lady, lady with the tray, lady with the tray, hey, whatever shots they want. Alright, just make a patrone.

Okay, girly though, girly patrone shots. Okay, hey y'all, look, guys, some shots. That's for y'all, I'm not gonna test. I'm glad we came together to make it work. It's not what you're giving. It's what you make of it. And if you can't come in her, come come on. I just felt so bad for Jess because Jess already, like her eyelids are already like, so they're like at an extreme, disdain level. Like there's a thing with eyelids when they get, but

eyelids reach a certain part of the, part of the eyeball. They're in the prime, disdain zone. And like, you could just tell she's like, I don't know what to do. My eyelids are already exactly what they need to be. I cannot put them anywhere else right now. Oh, and face like, well, maybe it's a nice, but never mind. Never mind. So, Mike's like, this is awesome. Hey, is this how you guys, you know, who do yardings? Is this how you guys live all the time?

I mean, you guys kill it because on Cruises, we don't get a day off for four months at a time. Yeah, and Lewis is like, well, I once went three and a half months without the break, or a proper omelet, any who, which really helps build up your charter stamina. And Ariana's like, you're what? Your charter stamina.

Year what? Charter stamina. Oh my stomach. Oh, oh my stomach. Oh, so Lewis is telling us, is this how American girls work? They just pretend they don't know what you're saying and then double over in pain.

And then Kyle is now talking to Casey and he's like, you're beautiful. I love to let your lip gloss tonight. Do your, hey, do your parents support you at these parts yourself? Cause I support myself. Oh, sometimes, no all that tone. You know, cause I don't wanna fucking come from

Monica girl, you know what I'm saying? I wanna have a good time. That's why I need you. I need a sort of girl that after she sees a horse and a fence, she said, let's take it. And we get on it right under the sun so who cares what happens next? Is that right?

He's so gross. Like, yeah, I need you in my life. I need you. And she's, well, that's not gonna happen. And he just like kisses her neck. And he's like, okay, now the shot then. Well, good thing the Vikings did a good job taking the girls right here

because the girls here out of this world, right? good job taking the girls right here, because the girls here out of this world, right? Look at this, look at this, all these girls. So then he starts just going around and victimizing table after table. I'm just exporting horrific American stereotypes to these poor Norwegian ladies. He's like a sampler dessert tray of disease, you know, just going from table to table. Like would you like it leaking scabby or just a cough until you bleed and die like Nicole Kidman at the end of New Longbruse?

I know, like really just terrible. So like when you first started talking to Casey, he goes, yeah, you look real pretty to my lack your lip gloss. You've been reapplying. What? What? I didn't hear the reapplying part. That's really funny. I don't.

Wow. You've been reapplying. Wow. That's a great line. You've been reapplying. You've been reapplying. You're really staying on top of that lipstick. That lip-blows game, maybe. So then Chef, Chef Jess and Faye go outside to have a SIGGI and Jess is like, oh, you know, the thing is yarding

is tough. And you've got to have thick skin in yarding. Also thick bones, because you really never know when a... A long slab of marble is going to come down, not human. That reminds me, I've scotch taped my cast iron skillet onto the ceiling to see her long and land. Stay there. So just be careful in the galley tomorrow. Never know. And face like, oh yeah, my skin is so thick.

I can tell your tap is out, are are you and she tells us a little bit about herself and she's like well the thing is it it all starts with love the wrong kind of love I was in a toxic relationship my needed to escape so I've been I got into a plane and I went to Hong Kong and I went to New Zealand Thailand Dubai I've been rich I've been. And then I joined the Boating Industry. And I'm so confident moving into my future. Yeah, and I think... I think it's me. I'm sorry, go ahead.

No, no, you go. You go. I was just so excited by that backstory. And then they showed her as a like a stewardess in the 90s or something like with big red lipstick and chelkes like a different person really. her as a like a stewardess in the 90s or something like with big red lipstick and chelkes like a different person really, but she's like a model like, here I am about to give you a tight coke on the nail paint. Take that mother. Um, so Kyle is doing his, and Lewis is telling, oh, so Kyle's hitting on ladies at the bar and he's at a table with two cute ladies. And Lewis is like, Kyle is hitting, you know, he's a gentle giant from Texas.

They're like, oh. It's like, oh, we've heard of this place. So Kyle's like, hey, you want to come for a swim? You want to come for a swim? You want to do a swim? Hi, hi, and now he has like dip in his mouth, somehow he found dip because he has like in his lip, you know, and he's like, Hi, what's your Instagram? Follow me. Follow me. Yeah, yeah, follow me. Like, my Instagram has letters that you won't understand, like, oh, with slashing it. I don't understand that. Exactly.

And so Lewis is sitting on people too. So he brings this lady back to the table and he's like, come join us. And she's like, I'm from the island and he's like, oh, this is my first time here. You're the first Norwegian I've talked to. And Oriana's like, well, I'm kind of jealous. I mean, she's not that hot. I'm not really in the mood to watch these guys and check out locals. So I'm out, a bye.

And for you, it's like, have reads. You can't win. Oh, how rude. Just just basically like doing full house lines. So cut it out. So they're all heading back to the boat now and Kays there like Kyle is of course being wasted and he has all these he's just trying to he has these girls and Kaysie is like Or I'm sorry, but no, I got it mixed up Kaysie and Orianna have gone back to the boat Kyle's left the bar

And Kaysie and Orianna are in their in their room. They're talking about Kyle and Kaysie's like He's got a lot of issues doesn't he and Orianna are in their room, and they're talking about Kyle. And Casey's like, he's got a lot of issues, doesn't he? And Oriana's like, I fucking love him. I'm like, why would you love Kyle? This guy's a disaster. She's so weird. And she's like, yeah, I mean, he's not like harmful. He's just like young.

And Casey's like, I can see him getting like super fucked up. He's like a loose cannon. So then back at the bar, Mike's like, uh oh, Kyle's got one more drink left and I think he's done. And Kyle's like, oh yeah, I don't know what, but I'm swimming in something. I don't know what it's gonna be,

but it's gonna be something. If there's water in there, I'm gonna swim in it. That's for damn sure. I'm about to swim in something, yee yee motherfuckers. I don't understand drunk people who like to do this. It's like storm on below deck med this week also.

People who get drunk are like, yeah, I'm gonna jump in that water. Why, why, why do you wanna do this to yourself right now? This is ridiculous. So Lewis is like, well, no, I'm not jumping in the water. It's rather dangerous, but Kyle's now, because now they're at like the, on the pier.

And so Kyle's now taking his shirt off because he's gonna dive in. In this water, but Kyle's now, because now they're on the pier, and so Kyle's now taking his shirt off because he's gonna dive in. In this water, that's like 50 degrees, by the way, the water's freezing. Yeah, and they take Lewis's lady back to the boat, so she's gonna come, and the other ones that Kyle was talking to were kind of holding back,

that they followed them to the boat, I think just to see the TV show or whatever, but they just kind of hold back and giggle, because this guy's out of it, you know. And so Lewis is like, don't do it. A person I don't think it's a good idea to jump in. He's like, fine, I'm going to bed, yeah, I'm going to go to bed, I'm going to get on fucking tinter. So he goes into his room, we're Nathan is sleeping and he gets completely naked and lies back on his bed and starts like shooting nude pics of himself for online and Nathan's like, oh Jesus Christ, let me sleep.

He's literally taking dick pics like he's stretched back. It's like right there and the flash is going off. It's like, is he sending those pics to the Norwegian girls? Like what is he doing? And he's just like fully just doesn't care that like Nathan is he sending those pics to the Norwegian girls? Like, what is he doing? And he just like fully just doesn't care that like Nathan is up above him. It's crazy. Yeah. Wow.

So then the next day Nathan goes into the bathroom and he's like, oh my god again, this guy again, because you know, he's left a poopy in the toilet or something. Yeah. So Kyle's like, what up bro? Because he's like hung over or waking up and Nathan's like, bro, let me tell you this before, like, you keep leaving piss in the toilet and he goes, I know bro, he's like morning,

like always flush the toilet though, always flush the toilet. And Nathan says, I don't want to go into the bathroom, look at your poop and it's like inside the toilet, like leaves piss inside the toilet. Like this is nasty. So Kyle's like, the toilet, it like leaves piss inside the toilet. Like this is nasty. So Kyle's like, bro, you trying to tussle bro, don't speak to me like that in the morning bro.

Talk to me, Nassau, don't talk to me at all. Come in here and settle some shit. If not, stay out there. Keep your mouth shut. Yeah, I want to hurt you're pretty little face, bro. All right, you want to come in here and tussle bro, you better keep your mouth shut. And he's in the bathroom, you know, saying all this stuff to Nathan.

And it's like, don't talk to me like that bro. And he's like, oh yeah, I want a tussle. Come here please bitch. Jesus. Yeah, it was like, it was very uncomfortable to watch because like we've definitely seen, we've seen like, you know, guys on below deck start getting all aggressive with each other. We've seen guys start to fight or whatever.

They get drunk and they brawl or they get moody. We've seen that before, but this was definitely had a vibe that made me really uncomfortable because not only was it a really nasty kind of sending vibe but like there is just this feeling with Kyle that he just seems to be really racist trash. It seems like that's what he seems like. A person of color is asking to do something and he has a really aggressive reaction against it and honestly everything before about like oh you know Nathan's the kind of person is bitching all the time that it like that he reads that into Nathan when Nathan's not showing signs of that like that is the whole point of why we why we say these

things and why this guy is such a piece of shit trash garbage human being. Yeah, yeah he's terrible. So Casey's like I Think the guys are like thought a and orionist as well It's just a bunch of like single like a warning eyes trying to like find out who they are. I mean come on and Kyle is saying yeah, you know Well, I think from the start Nathan has just been trying to antagonize me and you know being from Texas It's just like it teaches you when the odds are against you, you just fight and cowboy up. Like, don't blame us for that.

You know, you're just a fucking asshole and you'd be in trouble for that shit in Texas too. Fuck. That's right. And honestly, like Nathan has not been antagonizing you because it, but again, the fact that you are perceiving what he does as antagonizing says everything. And also, what are you saying when the odds are against you? You literally are the one with most

experience who it's like on a track to be promoted by Lewis and you're saying the odds are again what odds are against you? What odds are against you? You have to flush the toilet. That's not God. Yeah, that's like literally it. You poor fucking guy. You poor stealing fucking poor fucking guy. So he's like, hey, he just got cowboy, flush the toilet. The cowboy's the flush too. Our real cowboy flushes the toilet. We flush our toilets in Texas people, okay?

So then the chef is like, man, I'm going to leave him some boat provisioning. So if you need me, call me if there's an avalanche of I'm going to leave for some boat provisioning, so if you need me call me if there's an avalanche of marble dough flatness, just give me a ring, I'll be right back. You know, I taught myself how to cook. Yes, of course I did, I'm fabulous, can't you tell? I did a three month intensive in Ireland. I said, if I can learn how to cook in Ireland, I can cook anywhere, and whenever I tell people that, they're like, Ireland, you learned how to cook potatoes, and I'm like, no, you idiot. But of course, that is mainly what I did cook.

Yes, it is true. But I learned. Now, that's not to say that I don't cook a mean potato. I cook a very good potato and I can also do a jig. Well, doing it too. But that's not the point. I've also learned how to cook many things like haddock and salmon and mainly potatoes, but still.

I learned feeding people is my love language, you know, sprinkle some goodness on it. So she goes shopping in town and Kyle is talking to Kate. Oh God. Okay. So Casey's in the laundry room and Kyle comes in like, Hey, morning, morning, how you feeling? And she's like, um, are you hungry? La and he's like, yeah, I am 23. I'm not ever hungover.

All right, baby Well, you had a lot to drink and so I'd be worried and and so he's like oh you put in your walls up now Because I always have it walls up Yeah, the walls have always been up. Where are you acting like she's been all over you dude? You don't have something going on with this girl, okay? Yeah. So she's like, yeah, I always have my walls out. And he goes, yeah, I know, women and their walls. Women don't understand a good thing when it comes to them. Or comes on them.

So Nathan is like, everyone's been in. When you had a Billed Ruse, there'd be fucking apartment conflicts. It's around me. There've been signing walls put at. It's like that old Kathy Dennis song, G Jim any walls. Yeah, that's right. I know the song So Nathan is like so Nathan's basically like he doesn't want to be upset and so he wants to squash it And so he feels like but he knows that if you talk to Lewis Lewis can be like, oh, it's okay. Don't worry about it

I don't know And he says Lewis, Lewis can be like, oh, it's okay. Don't worry about it. That another. And he says Lewis and Kyle, it seems like he's an ass sucker to him, which I liked. I like the idea of an ass sucker, not just a kiss or a black house, actually sucking Lewis's ass. So he's going to figure out what to do. Yeah. So then it cuts the crowd going this cow this towel is dry them and Campbell's try So then fake calls an interior meeting and in the meantime Kyle is talking to Lewis and he's like

Hey, you don't even need sunglasses in Norway, bro, and Lucy's like well, I need them I need them on my face. He's oh, yeah, I want a lot of things on my face, bro, and they have sunglasses Of course I'm talking about a chemical peel. They have just a lot of wealth of stupidity from this person. I mean, he's a font of stupidity. Truly. She's. So, um, uh, oh, hey, hey, my mom just texted me, BGDubs.

This is not about a celebrity who died. My mom said the Senate just passed a landmark bill, Dems plus 12 Republicans to safeguard same sex marriage. Well, how, how do you do the, thanks mom. Unfortunately, that's not really what that bill does. It doesn't, it still make it legal. God, plus not get into this.

I thought I was sure. I'm pretty sure the mom was nowhere. I'm pretty sure the mom was nowhere. From what I've read about that. She also says, God, I love that million dollar renovation show on HGTV. Yeah, but it's nice. Don't drag me into politics. And you, yeah, I read that bill was something like it they word it that way, but it still makes it legal for states to Outlaw it completely if they want to and I don't know I'll read more I apologize

I thought I was happy. I felt like I was bringing an antidote all this Kyle discussion I was like well guess what and I felt like I was bringing some some light into this But all I did was really bring politics and no one wants to play it. Nobody wants that especially from us because we don't really know. You know I'm like I think this is I think I'm supposed to be mad about this but I'm not really sure yet. Wait down now I just read this. Turkeys can now run for president what about oh wait no I'm sorry that was an

article about how to defrost a turkey. By the way Ronnie off topic that this is actually really bothering me I'm having a friends giving on Saturday and I bought a butterball turkey a frozen one on Monday and it is still a rock hard and I needed to be thought by Friday so I can start putting the salt on it and stuff is it going to be do you think it's gonna be defrosted by Friday? I'm really concerned. Just take it out of the fridge on Thursday night. Is that okay? Is that safe to do? I don't know. I figure you could call the bad off it. All right, I'm just a yeeey kind of

bad. Anyway, this has been five minutes of misinformation with Ben and Ryan. People are exploding their turkeys and fryers and like sending gay marriages in Alabama. I married one male turkey to another male turkey and broken frozen in an oil fry. So anyway, it's a fade meeting. We're meeting the fade. So the level of this charter was pretty easy because of the guests and you know admittedly there were a few rolling pins that fell out of nowhere but you know that's okay but it's not going to be like that going forward going forward we anticipate hair style and skillets and perhaps a cutting board so please help it at all time girls.

And we need to step up the professionism here, Gels. And Ariana's like, okay, well, sure. I'm still trying to figure out what to do and what to prioritize. And I'm, I mean, like, for example, the laundry suit needs to stay down there in the laundry as opposed to like running up and down to help with service kind of a thing. Because that might be something to talk about.

Like she's coming with this weird like, ha, ha, wow. Teacher's pet kind of energy, but like, I'll say. to talk about. Like she's coming with this weird, like, oh wow. Teacher's pet kind of energy. But like, I'll say. Yeah, yeah. Teacher's pet, but also like I can also be a better teacher than like the pet is actually the better teacher energy too. Right, like I'm the pet that I'm going to take your job.

And so face like, well, yeah, but you're going to have to come up and down, aren't you? From the laundry, you know, that's just how it works. And cases like, yeah, like that's how I've always done that. And things like, I don't know why Ariana has sit in here, a sit in herself. And she's like, second stew. I've been stewed long enough to know that every trick

and the book, and I thought it was pretty clear when I gave single stripe epilets that her and Casey are equal until proven different. All right, well, I have a question then. So like, if I'm downstairs doing laundry, but I'm on my stilts and my sort of upstairs too, because it's like, I can be pretty tall. And Oriana is like, well, okay, well, thank you for keeping us on our toes. Thanks. So that's a key. To being faster and more efficient is being more organized. At the end of the day, I would split up zone out crack on. Carry on, then.

You see, you see, you're hurry on it just like trying to add that all up in your head. Like what? Zoot, but zone out crack on. Carry on, then. I feel like, Faye at any moment is going to say, Now let's do our lessons. Doremi fa solatid. I feel like she's going to start teaching the medicine like basic songs.

The hair is paradise, this is dance, that's music. Ooh, Ronin can fell on the hill. Just kill all of the fan trap children, all of the one trap children with the rolling pin. For sure. I think their name should have been not done trap, but one shot your trap. I'm trying to cook here. The one's flat children. One stupid. It's not even a play on words, it's just how I feel.

So they do like one of those fist pile things. Do you see what we're doing, putting our hands on top of each other, it's disgusting, but all right, do what you're going to do. Okay, well, we did that now. Someone please go downstairs, come upstairs, please. Sorry, Rihanna. please go downstairs, come upstairs please. Sorry, Raya Ma. So now it's time for provisions, provisions on top of the provisions that Jess is already doing. And by the way, I would have liked more time with Jess and her like little basket going to local Norwegian supermarket. It's like, give me 30 minutes of that. I will just be there. So then Mike, the decans are getting provisions out of like a container That's like on the side of the street and Mike's like this is where working on container ships comes in handy

And they're like great story Mike come on grab the Martin Hellies. I've got a better one I just farted and learned God dang it So now Nathan is going he asked to talk with Captain Kerry and he goes up there and he says, you know, I've been issued my roommate and this morning the floor was a disaster. The bathroom is always a disaster and I let him know and I said, hey bro Kyle, you're pissing the toilet again. And from there he just started saying like, you want a rumble, come in the bathroom, do you want to fight me, do you want to fight me?

So Kerry's shaking his head like, or in New Itch, or you want to fight me, do you want to fight me? So, carry shaking his head, like, or, and knew it, or, you know what? Rule of thumb, or as I say, rule of may, I could tell something was a Roy. And Nathan's like, yeah, you know, if there's a possibility that I could like, switch with somebody else, that would be cool. Because if somebody can just like, switch to that moment with me, like, to that conclusion, like we're gonna fight, you know, he's like, I can't be around that. So just switch me if you could. And he's like, well, I'm glad you kind of me.

I want to allow anyone to be threatened by another crew member. Ah, oh, all right, I'm gonna deal with this swiftly. Thank you for coming to talk to me. Now that's a dark adventure, but it's an adventure role to say. And I appreciate you leading us on it. Oh, it is already planning on writing up the coil. I'm on his inappropriate behavior and for the guests and the official adventure logbook of problems.

But I'm not going to tolerate bullies. And I'm not going to tolerate anyone who makes someone feel uncomfortable. And I'm not going tolerate anyone who makes someone feel uncomfortable and I'm not gonna tolerate any sexual harassment and you know what else I won't tolerate a lack of adventure which we're having on this episode because of coil yeah I was um doubting the captain at this point yeah I was like okay but you haven't written him up for the inappropriate with the behavior with the guest you haven't talked to him about the Casey stuff I'm right now I'm thinking this is just all talk. Say no.

We've been down this path before. Frankly, I don't know you, sir. Okay, I just don't know you yet. So then Kyle is watching someone on a path, some lady on a paddle board and a bikini. He's like, God, damn, these girls are gorgeous. Can you imagine if we did the Charter Thorn or Norwegian girls? Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, or Regent Girls. Oh, yeah, you can just go on to a fairy nearby.

So then face downstairs, face like drop towels. We need to put drop towels down, everyone. Drop towels. Repeat after me. When you see a towel, make sure it's a drop towel okay Ariana Yachton so Casey's like okay and then Ariana's like I used to be Casey's boss I gave her her first job in Yachting I know her weaknesses and who she is as a person and I don't want baby think Casey's better than me

well don't forget Ariana the day, you are you are poorly, you are very poorly. So now, Kerry summons Lewis, and he's like, well, today, Nathan was really upset because Horus was threatening him in the voilings. And I feel like he's a threat to the safety of the creed man bears. And Lewis is like, yes, I'm upset about it. I was going to save him. He is the most experienced and I wanted him to be lead deck-and. And I measured him, he has to behave more professionally. It's his to lose.

He's consistently crossing the line. I am so upset. Well, he is the right to defend himself. Are you sure? Because he does have a squeegee rifle. He's the squad. Not that way. All right. Well, he is the right to defend himself. Are you sure? Because he does have a squeegee rifle. He's not that way. All right. He's got the right to defend himself with words,

but these accusations are ground for instant this missile. And Lewis flinches because he's like, I'm like, I was confrontation. Confrontation ahead. So, um, Lewis tells us, well, he's definitely not the picture of perfect, picture perfect crew member, is he? And then it cuts the car. Don't perfect. Yeah. A good one.

But Kyle is experienced enough that I could, I could learn something from him, like how to swallow a jellyfish hole. And I need him on deck. I hope this conversation goes well with Kerry. I hope Kyle can turn this around. Like why is Lewis like such a believer in Kyle? I don't I just don't understand this. I think it's what honestly I do think it's what you said before that I think that Lewis is like he is it is that beta alpha thing going on And I think that he just wants to be a sidekick to someone

Yeah, it's like oh my god don't make me fire the The madman man. He's what do you think of me? So he's like, the captain wants to talk to you. So it's like a really long walk to the bridge in silence. And all you can hear is Kyle smacking gum. So the captain sits down with Kyle and he's like, my all of a complex from a crew about you behave. Yeah. And Kyle's like, uh, huh. And he just goes, uh, he makes like an egg sound, but his eyes like widen all the way. And like he knows he's fucked. Yeah, he does.

And carries like, apparently there was an altercation between you and Nathan this morning in the cabin. He can't tell the side of your story. And so Kyle's like, Yeah, well, my side of the story is I woke up. And the first thing I heard is you need to flush the piss out of the toilet. And then I said things like, well, I guess I probably shouldn't have said them. He's like, what, what did you say? Yeah, and he goes, and he's like,

it's like, well, you want a tussle or anything like that. You know, I said, you want a tussle and cares like, well, you know, that's threatening the Havya. Don't you? Because right, right, right, right. Yeah. That's not acceptable. Your honesty means a lot. And further, I believe what you have, I believe you have what it takes to be a great

decant. I was like, oh my God, this motherfucker is going to let it go. I'm going to be a great dick can't. And I was like, Oh my God, this motherfucker is going to let it go. I want to give you the option of resigning clean no worries. And there will be no evidence of this in the official loan books. What you look to do that? Because I'd like it to go that way. And I was like, Okay, a yes, applause. Thank you. Yes. I couldn't believe it. Be fuck that. I'm not putting in a logbooks fire him. Now he's now you're leaving him to go do this shit to other people on another boat. Get rid of him. Yeah. Well, I just was. I was so impressed that he got fired right at that moment and that and that carry did it in such a way where he made Kyle feel like he had some sort of agency. Like it was such a slick way to be like, not saying, sorry, we can't have you here anymore.

We got to let you go. He was just like, so I'm going to give you the option to leave. OK, we invite you to get out of here. And this is really like in a way, it wasn't passive aggressive, but it kind of felt passive aggressive. It sort of had a width of it. I'm going to give you the option to resign, which is like such a nice way

of saying you're fired. The discussion isn't even if you're fired. You're fired. What do you like to do you like to do this part? Yeah, I'm doing you this favor. I just thought it was so savage. I loved it. I mean, I agree with you. Like, it should have been written up, but I just, I was so savage. I loved it. I mean, I agree with you. It should have been written up. But I was just so impressed that he just nipped in the blood. It's like, nope, not on my boat. Yeah, and he's like, well, he tells us threats of violence. That goes on your record. And someone asked why you're fired. I'm going to tell him it could seriously

hinder any chances of you getting a job. But he made a mistake and he told the truth. And this one mistake shouldn't affect the rest of his career. Yeah, well unfortunately, um, it's on TV. So maybe that's a few. I wonder if you would still feel that way if he actually saw all this stuff because you know, sometimes I have to remind myself the captain doesn't really see this, you know, so he doesn't see the microaggressions and then the straight-up aggression aggressions and he doesn't see the extent of the, you know, like, kissing in the, trying to kiss somebody when they don't want it in a cave from front of the guest or just his

general how he acts around the guests or when he's out, you know. Yeah, also, maybe there was a part of Kerry that was like, well, I'm not going to write in the logbook, but it's all on camera. So like, the record is out there. So it's like, I'll just leave it. I'm not gonna go nuts on this. But then he's like, all right, well, Lewis will take you down to your room

and they'll be a car waiting to take you to a hair tail tomorrow. Then we're gonna fly you home and then on that flight, we're gonna offer you some complimentary food and just when you're about, oh, you did, we're gonna take it away from you and then we're gonna spill a cocktail on your lamp a little bit. And then when you land in New York, we're probably just gonna throw an egg at your head, so enjoy.

So goodbye. And guys like, well, no worries, no worries. I have a good one, I guess. He walks out like completely shell shot. And he tells us, I'm super fun. I feel like the captain should have had like a three-strike roll or something, you know? I was one altercation with a bunkmate, because I didn't flush from a picture whatever no

That's that you even see it like that. I wish you could bring you back in and fucking fire you proper And then he goes I mean if it's yellow it's mellow and I'm always stuck to that rule It's like okay, so really? You are on a yacht You're not walking on the Appalachian Trail, okay? We're crying out loud, okay? It's mellow. Good.

That rule does not apply when you're living with people on a luxury yacht and you're cramped quarters and you gotta keep things nice, okay? So, he's like, I've always kept to that rule, but you know what, you create fate. So after all these trials and tribulations up comes the conclusion that I may be the source of the problem, but then again, I was just being myself. So I can't be mad at that. Like, no, you should be mad at that,

because you are being yourself and you don't see it as any reason to change. So, be a better self, be a better self. Be a better self. I'm just being myself. Yes, and yourself needs to be better Sure Yes

Exactly people just always say that is if that's like the you know, I don't know. Did you ever wind up seeing bros? With Billy Eichner No, there's a movie called bros I was like what do you talk? No, but that was like the whole vibe of that movie was Billy Eichner being like, I just need to be myself. It's like, I'm just being myself. Why can't it?

It's like, your self is terrible in this movie. It'll be a better person, you know? And I just don't understand what people are, people love saying, I'm just being myself. I think it's good to be authentic to yourself, but also know that like you are probably flawed, me included, and so just like being steadfastly behind being yourself is sometimes not always a good thing. If I was only myself, I would have been in prison years ago. Okay. Sometimes yourself needs to be curbed.

So, if I were being myself, you know, like I would I would have a I'll be full on quasi motor by now. Okay, because myself wants to have a hunchback and I'm fighting it. I'm fighting it goddamn it. So everybody is kind of watching him go. No one really knows what to say and Lewis a little gossip is like, say, can you guess what's going on? And she's like, uh, he's leaving. Yeah, there's a problem, a problem with him in Nathan. And Lewis, Lewis is on my nerves too. My God. Yeah. Yeah. Like that's what you're going to do. Go around and make it sound like, oh, we got in a fight with Nathan.

So now he's gone. No, he's an unprofessional fucking asshole and he got fired. Yeah. Exactly. I was like really rooting for Lewis in the beginning. I felt like, oh, this is nice. It's going to be a guy who is not going to be a dickhead and who's going to like lead calmly. But I do feel like he's kind of a snake. I don't think that he should have even mentioned that Nathan was part of this because by the way, Nathan did not ask for this guy to be fired.

Nathan just asked to have a room change which is actually a very um I feel like a very rational and and like normal requests when you're having an issue and so I hate that Lewis is saying this stuff because I feel like he's poisoning the well against Nathan yeah so um Kyle just kind of passes people without saying buy or whatever. And Lewis is like, well, I'm upset about Kyle's quote-unquote resignation. And I don't want to go into the second chapter with the man down. If he came to me, we could have sorted things out at a little easier. No, if he came to you, it would have happened like the first time you had a talk to Kyle, which was you being like, I'm going to give you a raise. Just behave yourself. I'm about to make you the boss of the whole fucking boat, Lewis.

You've already proved yourself useless in that department. So he did the absolute right thing and not going to you because he knew you were weak and would do nothing and we're had your head up, the alpha's ass. Yeah. Exactly. So then Jess walks up to Faye and goes, hello sunshine. That was facetious. You're the opposite of sunshine.

You're stormy cloud. You're sad weather right now. You're a hailstorm. Anyway, that I had this moment. Oh, is something actually happening here? Yeah, Kyle is leaving. Oh, in the toilet. So like, do not pass go, do not collect $200 kind of leaving. Juck, yes. I think he was getting a bit leery last night. Now I'm putting two and two together. And it's like, well, did something happen with Lewis and Kyle? Maybe Kyle came home and got a little rowdy or something? Or did something?

And she said, yeah. What do you think got a little rowdy implies you idiot? So, well, in yawning, there are youngsters that come in guns are blazing and they have too much to drink and then face plant. I often find it to be quite hilarious to be fair, but I've been told by the producers that this is a sad moment. So here I am, my sad. She's not giving any of that.

I love it. She's not even going to play that game. So Lewis comes up to them and Jess is like, so Kyle's leaving us and goes, yeah, Kyle's leaving now. And she's like, so he cooked his goose the first night. We'll have just be friendly and say goodbye. It's like, yes, of course, you're going to be a man down. Is this wise? Well, it's not my decision. Please just go a bit farewell. Well, I did know he's going to be for a good time not a long time who's gonna teach us all how to line dance Again that sarcasm. I don't care about that American style of moving your feet

Laundancing ridiculous She's just like a mocking She doesn't give a fuck. I love her. You know, honestly, I feel like when I see her, I feel like she does look sort of like a version of Kate Chastain and I feel like she carries Kate's energy too. So I'm just like so happy that like that lined up like that.

So funny. So Lewis is now going to tell Orianna. He's like, well, did you hear what happened? Well, he's gone. He's leaving. So when you see him, say goodbye. What? What are you, his mom?

What the fuck? Yeah. Well, I knew it was, why do we have to say goodbye? Why does everyone have to say goodbye to Kyle? Yes. Let him go. So then, Kyle's like packing an Orianna goes to his room. He's like, I hear you're heading out.

Sorry, I couldn't get to know you more, God, you really never saw me with doubles stilts on my arms. Geez. You never really got to see me move with loop music. Oh, it's such a great experience. So then, the mic is like, oh, you're leaving. I mean, I don't think I can do this without you.

Not gonna lie. I mean, you were a real help. I mean, kind of a jackass, but, but, it's weird. It's not, I'm not for everybody. He's like, yeah, he bothered me with the ego, but like, have a one man less going into the second charter? Not good, especially when the ones that are here

have only worked on your own cruises, don, don, don, don. So then Jess is like, oh, well, I guess I should say this to your face. So I don't look like such an awesome on television. But cowboy, we're sad that you're not going to be here to teach us to line times. Thank you so much for entertaining us and being a laugh a minute. It's like, oh, Ouch. I just kick him and then that's on the way out, baby. I'm going to go into town and see if there's anyone who can show me how to stack pebbles and equally useless hobby. So then cars like, where's in reals and reals been fine?

It's been real, it's been fun. It hasn't been real fun. Loose is like, I still don't know what you're talking about. God damn it, I'm in love with you. Good luck to you, mate. Well, for a kid from Texas to even make this far to Norway, I mean, I've never had a stable lifestyle pun intended because my mom did a silverish from a stable, but always moving around and stuff, like going to keep to find the odds, to keep doing what I'm gonna do. I'm going out of my head high, my cowboy high and high,

and wherever the wind blows, that's where I'm going. Rockstar lifestyle, even though I said I'm a cowboy, and my cowboy or my rocker, which one am I? I don't know, and you'll never know. How you like that? Yeah, look at me, just proving everybody wrong. Rockstar lifestyle goes on the side of the road, bus, bus, bus, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, ye, goes on the side of the road, bus bus bus, yee yee, yee, yee, yee, yee, yee, yee, yee, yee, yee, yee, yee, yee, yee, yee, yee, yee, yee, yee,

look okay, just go away. And I love his, I'm gonna keep defining the odds, first of all. I'm gonna keep defining the odds and previewing people wrong. I was like, you just got fired on like your second day. What are you defining, sir? Go. I know. You're lucky they didn't have you on a fucking donkey going up the side of a mountain like that kid who got fired by Captain Danny. I think it was the I think it was Danny on the first blow,

deck man, they put him on that. Oh, my God. I'm so like Santorini or something, so bizarre. You have to climb that mountain. And then I saw that guy at a Mendocino farm. I thought, wow, what a journey this guy's been on. Oh my God. Anyway, wow, funny, funny times.

Thanks everyone for listening. We're gonna be back tomorrow with some real housewives of Salt Lake City. So stay tuned for that. And we'll catch you on the next one. Bye everyone. And bye. Watch what crap ends with like to think it's premium sponsors.

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