Watch What Crappens - Below Deck Med: Don't Toy With Me

Episode Date: September 14, 2022

Natasha whips a dildo out on the wrong guests this week on Below Deck Med, and Kyle mopes around after losing the love of his life. Also, a lot of orange juice was purchased.  This week's premium Patreon bonus is a trailer breakdown for the new season of Real Housewives of Potomac. Join Patreon at patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cupi from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. I have cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cr Well, hello everybody and welcome to Watch What Corruptes! The podcast for all that crap we love to talk about on EO Braves. I'm Ronnie, that's been over there. Hello, Ben.

Hi Ronnie, how are you? Good, how are you doing your day fresh from the... Emmy stage? Ha ha ha! Fresh from the Emmy stage! And by Emmy stage, I mean far away from the Emmy stage, but yes, I am, I'm surprisingly, I'm doing well. I'm alive. I thought I was gonna be like really, really, like I thought it'd be like hung over

and exhausted from party hopping and living that crazy Emmy lifestyle, but the truth is that we forgot that that's like part of like the Emmy thing. And so we went to the governor's ball that was right after the Emmys But we didn't go to any other part. We didn't go like the HBO party It was a Netflix party because we forgot that that's something you have to you should try to do and so we didn't reach out to anyone that we knew or So we went to the governor's party had fun and went home

But yeah, the Emmys were so fun. They were so fun. It was really cool. So for people who want to know, why the heck were there? My boyfriend, Dominique, he is a governor of the choreography peer group. So as a governor, he goes to the Emm goes to the Emmys because, you know, his pure group is in charge of, you know, among other things, you know, the, I think the nominations and, you know, stuff with the choreography awards that are part of the Emmys. So we got to go. It's so

cool. It's really, really cool. And so that's why we went to Creative Arts ones, and then we got to go to the main show. And it was also really cool to go to one of the big four award shows. It was cool to see how that kind of works, how you get in. I was just fascinated by the logistics of it all, having commercial breaks and things like that. There were so many famous people there, which was very cool. I was mainly armed, like far, I wasn't like really interacting with any of them because if you saw the telecast, like all the nominees and famous people were sitting at tables.

And then everyone else was like in seats. And so we were in the seats. And but then afterwards at the governor's ball, there were people around. The telecast was really fun though because it was cool being in the room for some of the memorable moments. Like, Shirley Ralph, she won an Emmy for Abit Elmentary and you may have seen the videos of it, but she got up there. First of all, she was crying, she was walking up.

And so the energy of just everyone giving her a standing ovation, surely, Ralph, from it's a living among other things. And then she gets up there and she starts singing. And it was such an electric moment. And I actually watched the video back this morning. And it was so cool to see the video, but honestly, in the room, it was so electric.

So I felt very privileged to be able to see some video but honestly like in the room it was so electric so I felt very privileged to be able to like see some moments like that. But honestly the coolest part was this, this governor's ball because we may possibly have a brand new listener, listener to the podcast because the coolest thing ever happened. So I saw Stephen Colbert there, and I used to be an intern on Strangers with Candy 20 years ago, 22 years ago. I was an intern and Steve. That was so crazy. Yeah, I know, that's a weird quirk in my back story.

Or a user, a loser, and a loser. So it was like the year was 2000, and people may not realize that Stephen Coldbear was on that show and I actually interacted with him quite a bit back and back at that time. And so I went up to him and of course he didn't remember me, but I was like, I just wanted to let you know. I was an intern on strangers with candy and he was like, oh my god. He's like, well, he was like, wow, and you're okay. You're doing okay. I was like, yes, I am. And we like talked a little bit. And he and he was, when I tell you people, he was like, oh my God, he's like, well, he was like, wow, and you're okay, you're doing okay. I was like, yes, I am. And we like talked a little bit.

And he was, when I tell you people, he was so friendly. He was like, oh, so what are you doing now? Like he was asking about, he wasn't just doing the celebrity thing of like, oh, that's such a funny thing. Well, you know, so good, thank great seeing you again. He was like, so what are you doing now? And I was like, well, actually, you know, I'm a podcast

and he goes, oh, what's your podcast? I go, it's called Watch for Crappens. He goes, watch what crapens. And he like chuckled. And then he's like, what's it about? And I said, oh, it's like a comedy podcast. And we recap like the real housewives and stuff on Bravo. And he goes, oh, he has, we'll have to take a listen.

So potentially, Stephen Colbert could be listening. Well, hi, potential Steve Colbert, MAGA. No, come back, Stephen. But I don't think he's going to listen, but it was so cool. But then the craziest thing happened with then he goes, hold on a second. Do you mind if we take a picture together? And I was like, that's supposed to be my line, but okay, in my mind, I'm saying that.

I'm like, sure, he goes, I wanna see if Amy and Paul remember you, like Amy Sideras and Paul, I think his name is Paul Tonello, who's also like one of the three of them created that show. So then like I was taking a selfie with Stephen Colbert and it was his idea. And I wanted to be like, could you send that to me?

But then I felt like it's weird to ask a really big celebrity to text you something. So I just am like, I have a selfie with Stephen Colbert out there, it's on his phone. I'll probably never get to see it again, but it was so cool. And I just love the idea that he took interest in watch or crap and even for just that moment So that was like definitely like one of the big highlights for me. Oh, that is cool. I love that

You're gonna he's gonna be cat fishing as you on Raya Could you imagine he's like cat fishing me He's gonna show off pictures of him and be like oh my god god, guess what I'm at, Stephen Colbert, but it's like him. It's like a fishing ass. He's gonna cut himself out and be like, hey, Tamra Barney, am I right? Ha ha ha, down to foot. So yeah, that was definitely a highlight.

There were some other cool things. I mean, I learned that Dom is apparently friends with Ariana DeBose, so we hung out with her for a little bit and like danced with her, which was crazy because I'm like, wow, you want an Oscar. But she was also incredibly, she was so sweet. And she was like, she just felt like a friend, right?

Like, it felt like she could just like hang out and like, you know, so that was cool. And then I walked by Patricia Arquette and I immediately texted you. I was like, Patricia Arquette's behind me because I was like, I know you love medium. I love medium. I love it. Come on, that's Alessand Du Bois. Yeah, the original Alessand Du Bois. Before the psychic was based on Patricia Arquette's portrayal of the future. That's how psychic that show was. Listen, Dubois actually saw beyond Rangoon and said, I want to be like that.

And then I don't know, they were just like those are like my big like cool, fun interactions. And Maylin, May who won Top Chef a few years ago, she was doing some of the hors d'oeuvres. She was making these little fried chicken sliders and they were amazing. And then Sherry Yard, who also tends to show up on Top Chef in various cooking shows, she made these benches that I literally like melt. Like I nearly passed out. They were so good.

So but I did not see Andy Cohen. I thought I would see Andy Cohen, but I didn't see him. So I don't think he's allowed in there. Well, they were so snobby about reality shows. It's so funny because when they show the categories, everyone, you know, like every nominee, there's all these big cheers, especially because like, there's a lot of cheerleaders in the audience, like anything from Apple, everyone from Apple's like, whew! Like they're so loud, and then all of because like there's a lot of cheerleaders in the audience. Like anything from Apple, everyone from Apple's like, woo, they're so loud. And then all of a sudden there's something from Netflix. So all the Netflix people are like, yeah. And then they're

like, okay, now it's time for the competition. Reality competition program. And they have tried it out to people from the Lord of the Rings. And they were so pissed for having to do the Lord of like reality show category. Like the guy, I'm sure if anyone saw it, he'd like was so unenthused about having to present it. And then they're like, from CBS, the amazing race. And it was like, top chef. But then they're like, there's those big girls. You know, oh, by the way, I also really enjoyed being part of the But then they're like, there's those big girls. Raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa like we don't have to, I don't like that dead person. Fuck that dead person. That dead person is getting this.

I know. I was like, oh, so we're giving all these big claps to that person. Well, I'm a clap extra hard for when you show it in. Yeah. I'll wait for the Betty White part. Okay. How many of that comes up? Yeah. Well, they opened with Betty White. I was actually that I thought that I thought that they opened with Betty White and they closed with Sydney Portier, Portier, Portier.

Portier. Portier. Portier. So, I think those are all my highlights, those exciting stuff I saw Lizzo walking near me. And I think that's about it. Yeah. That's so cool.

I'm glad you had a fun night. I really need to start dating better. We start making better for sure. Well, no, well actually Ronnie it really inspired me. It made me be like, Ronnie and I have to become Emmy nominees. I'm not saying that we have to win. I'm just saying like it looks really fun at the table section and I just want to sit at the tables. So let's like get a TV show. If anyone needs like two shiny faces for their shows or need to bubbly writers or just

two people to, I don't know, is there a craft service award we can do? Like just, I want to sit at the tables. It just look like a party. Yeah, hell yeah. Listen, I love a table. If anybody needs somebody for a job that requires a table, I'm good for that. Okay? Do anything at a table.

Just let me sit down. Yeah. Put us at a table with Shirley Ralph or really any sitcom star from the 80s. Like, give us, honestly, they really should do an It's a Living reunion at the Emmys next year. And then we can, we can be, I actually, we can also be seat fillers. I mean, I prefer to be Emmy nominees, but seat fillers would work too

for like seat filling for Angelian, you know? Yeah, and then we can keep turning to each other going, it's a living. Yeah. I don't laugh every time. Well, that's good. I'm glad you had a good time. So everybody, you know, go support Ben, watch the Emmys replay.

You will not see me. I'm telling you this right now, you will absolutely not see me. Look for the white guy in the text. You'll see. He'll be back. Oh, I definitely, like, I went through like an emotional journey. I've like, I've like, every picture I took last night, I went through an emotional journey. I've, I've, like, every picture I took last night,

I looked like a crazy person, and finally I had to, like, Dom had to coach me. He was like, Ben, like, your head forward. Okay, now chin down. It was like, I forgot how to take a picture. I have my photos, we're just like bonkers. It's crazy what being indoors and away from people for so long will do for your ability to take a photo.

Yeah, I've never really known how to do that, you know, never. I still don't know. I actually noticed your pictures. I thought you looked really like nice and you had a good stance in one of your, I was like, my stance, man. Thank you. Well, it had to be, it had to be like coaxed out of me. It was like one of those anti-M segments where they're like, she's just not getting it. Like, I just see she's too much into her head, but then the photo that they put up during judging looks great, you know?

In the sense that they finally, after like, you know, all these shots, they finally were able to get one decent shot out. So that was my little AT&T moment. I had like one shot that made it look like I was shooting like that all night long, but I wasn't. This was like, we're rooting for you. We're all rooting for you.

All right. Well, let's get into it because you're not the only one living the classy life. Okay. Some people are on a yacht. Mm-hmm. I mean, nominated below deck med in fact. Yes. Mm-hmm. I mean, nominated a low-deck med, in fact. Yes, the day I see you, look, look how close you are. Look how close.

So this is below-deck mediterranean episode 7, 10, finding the groove. Mm-hmm. Yeah, it's, why is it, oh yeah, because it's a disco party, that's right. So, you know, we're picking up the show after the big romantic high points of Kyle racing into Frank's arm and being,

I love you, you call, I love you Frank, I love you Frank. And I was hoping we'd see the like what happened next, but it's just the morning is the next morning. It's all in the past now. Yep, it's all over and we start with my favorite thing, Captain Sandy's looking at her computer, her wind computer screen going 27 knots. That concerns me.

Wind wind Sandy, wind wind Sandy, come in, wind, stop fucking with me today, okay? I'm not in the mood for this, I cannot take it all right. I was just like this share only Ralph just yesterday Wind wind sandy now listen You don't know this because I haven't taught you yet We're going a little harsh for the spoke. Okay, so what I need you to do is bring it down a little bit

Because I want everyone to have a good time. Okay, you're doing great, wind, doing great. And Kyle, across the road, it's like, I'm crying by Jack. I'm fucking tuned back to him, right now, and be riding that boy like a pony. Right, buddy. You guys acting like Frank just went off to the Great War or something like that,

or he's like in Cold Mountain standing at the window with a candle Waiting for Frank to come back to the yacht. Although I guess the truth is that in gay like in gay time zones like not times I hate timelines 25 days apart is the equivalent of like 45 years. So that is hard. Yeah, in gay years. I mean they made it to olden to golden pond years They were like on a canoe out in the middle of the fucking pond. Yeah fighting with each other How could that treat shame fond of that way Bye-bye I love you bye God I wish I could ride her like a pony.

This is a fashion online song, Golden Pond. I've never seen on Golden Pond, but I remember seeing commercials for it when they would show it on the local, local, remember growing up, we would actually show movies during the week, and I'm ever seeing lots of commercials for it. And so my experience with that movie is just from those commercials. And I feel like this works. I feel like I just assumed that's the dialogue in the movie. Yeah, I was a little baby when that came out, but I remember watching it on TV once

with my mom and she was just like, oh my god, this is so mean. And my father, it was like mommy issue. It was like daddy issues or something, this is so mean. And my father, it was like mommy issue, it was like daddy issues or something, starting Jane fondat. And I was like, I don't get this and my mom's being really weird right now. But I was stuck, you know? So let's see.

So Storm is cutting Z's hair, Courtney and Jason are washing the deck. And she's like, Twint, twint, twint, twint, twint, twint, twint. He's like, God, if you're so bullied, like I don't even get it. Why don't you trick around me like, Trin, Trin, Trin, Trin, Trin, Trin. He's like, God, if you're so bullied, like, I don't even get it. But if she trick around me, like, I don't get it.

Yeah, it's like not my humor. I'm working on commodities. So now there's a preference sheet meeting and it's gonna be, the guests are gonna be Lisa Moore and her daughter, Shelby, and their favorite cuisines, elevated Californians.

So Sandy's like, Huh! What's elevated Californian? Is Sandy's like, what's elevated California? Is that just food that's on a little platform? And it's like, no, it's, you know, it's tacos, sushi, you know, foods that are in the shape of California, add a lot of smog into the room that you serve it into, that kind of thing. Tacos are elevated California. The fuck kick him off. Why is nobody saying anything to this guy? He literally names two culturally specific foods to other areas, tacos and sushi.

I mean, obviously we have a ton of that here in Los Angeles, the very least. I mean, the joke about California cuisine is that you kind of can't describe it. It's just sort of like this generic term you throw on to things so you don't really know how to describe it. So you just say California. And I mean, it's like rustic simple. Farm to table. Yeah, it's like a vegetable that's you know, fresh ingredients. Yeah, it always looks like, do you have people working back there? Did you just throw some shit on the bottom?

You know, they're like, it's rustic, it's rustic, sir. So I guess elevated California would be like unrestic, solid, and so. And I think that like, I think it's like, I think the farm to table thing is really big in California, but I mean, that's not specific to California, but there's definitely in Northern California, there's a big farm to table movement and, or there always has been like, napa.

And, but like, I don't know, I just, it's not possible. Well, first of all, it's a ridiculous, it's a ridiculous request to have elevated California, but it's also ridiculous to say it's Takas. That's right. And I was kind of infuriated by both sides. Why was I infuriated? I don't know, because it shows on a Monday and you're going to get infuriated people when you have a show on a Monday night. Okay. No one likes

it. But yeah, I was kind of infuriated watching it too because talkos that's ridiculous. Okay. Be as a waiter. You'd never want to wait on someone with a name more. Okay? Never. Because people generally live up to their names and I hate demanding customers. You know, it's already hate those people. So then storm is like, and in the morning, they requested yoga, but they didn't request it from someone who's never been a bossin before, which really has me worried. I'm really going to work on that today.

It's my journey. Yeah. Storm is like really all about being a boss and in a way that's a little annoying. He's like, now at the time, there's a level of consequences and achievements and everything that comes between. I mean, I really enjoy the pressure. I need to trust people. I mean, if something goes wrong, it'll be on me. I mean, I'm a person. I'm essentially the most important person in all of the Mediterranean right now. I'm a person. I'm a person. Yeah, congratulations on your

your rays or whatever, but we're not making a documentary about you. You know what I mean? It's like those cameras are not all here for your life story to show and they got Oscars or whatever whatever whatever they're not shackled in. Okay. All right, this is not endurance. Ficturing Olympic music playing behind him. He's like, the moment, happy game, a potent, changed my route forever. And every time they got to him today, it was cracking me up by the end. By like the fifth time they did it, I was like, okay, they're just, they're just pranking this board. I know.

It's like, he's really vying for not pranking this board. I know, it's like, she's really vying for not just an Emmy award. He wants the governor's award. He wants the special one, which by the way last night was given to Gina Davis. So I was like, I really feel proud. Like I'm like so happy that I came to the Gina Davis Emmy. Is, you know?

But the governor's award is like, congratulations. It's me, Governor Newsom. You can turn your air conditioner to 75 for two hours, one week night of your choice. Hugs, everybody. Hugs all around. Would you like a taco? It's elevated us, please. By the way, at the Governor's Ball thing, the biggest lines were for sushi. And I would say for tacos, that the reason why there wasn't a huge line for tacos is that there was like literally 10 different taco stations. So maybe Dave is on to something

Well carbs too, you know, you were at an industry event That's true. So They also want beach they want to beach setups this time and a 70s party So this sounds like a bunch of hell basically for everybody and the captain's like whoa a 70s party. So this sounds like a bunch of hell basically for everybody. And the captain's like, whoa, a 70s party, that's cool. Have I told you about the time the pirates and I rack came up to my boat in the 70s? That was nuts. That was crazy. You know, I ended up doing the Mickey Mouse, the entire Mickey Mouse disco album, you know, disco duck. Remember that one? Did that was the dumb? I mean, that was a good time. Told you, nobody, you know, disco duck. Remember that one? Did that with sedan? I mean, that was a good time. Told the new buddy, you know, everyone has their good moments.

Hey, and guess what? They also want to have a guy's and dolly party. If you're wondering why they say dolly instead of dolls, it's because they want to dress up like their favorite celebrities, Guy Fieri and dolly Parton, which is both a celebration of gay life and a hate crime at the same time. Yeah, I just wanna hate these people, even though I love Dolly. Everyone loves Dolly, but the guy for the area of it is, that's a tough pill to swallow. It's the top chef network, okay? It's time for commercial. It's time for a crowd. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life.

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We'll talk about what went right and wrong. What would we do differently? And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone. So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. I've been scum-er-shul So now um... Courtney and Zeerana docked

and she has like a box she's like, just to make you feel sick right now imagining a scallop right now uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh's like, hey, scallops creatures are fish. He's like, you work in the kitchen. Jason's like, I, I, I'm a, I'm a starfish. You see, no, that doesn't, it's not, it's supposed to be scallop, Jason. Good try. Bullied. So then, Tosh and Dave, she is trimming a pineapple in the galley very oddly. She's like,

standing really close to Dave to trim her pine. I don't know, I don't think I've ever described somebody as trimming a pineapple oddly, but this was it. If ever the time with there is this, she's just like really slowly. I don't know what shape she's making those leaves. And, you know, of course, Dave is like, she loves me. Look at this. She loves, she's trimming a pineapple. The love of my life.

Prickly on the outside, but once you get in there, it's so sweet. Did you say something, Dave? Something bad. Well, she's probably trimming it oddly because she's trying to convince Dave that it's actually a potato. Like, oh, what you doing to that pineapple? It's a potato, Dave. What you're seeing? I see a pineapple. I try a Dave, you see a pineapple again.

This gaslighting him into just inconsequential things. Inconsequential beliefs. Tonight, I'm serving some mashed potatoes. This is just like a whole bunch of pineapple chopped up. Damn it. I knew it. I knew it. So Natasha's, she tells him, I used to do this with three girls, I used to work with, I

said three things for great for Thor and the Marne. What are the things that you're grateful for Dave? Kyle passes by in here, which I just love the shot of him because you know he's got all of the inside thoughts and you need to be set out loud for this. And the chef is like, well, I'm grateful for cake glaze. That's one thing. Love cake glaze. Yes, love cake glaze. Um, thank for for more cake. My man to Lynn, I love my man to Lynn. And he's like, it really paid off not going out with the crew because they feel like shit. And I feel like, look at me, Stahls, Roses, Sunshine, no hangover guilt.

And he's like, I'm grateful that I got six hours of sleep last night. I'm like, it's better than three days. Oh! And now she's got like some weird, Fort Mance with Dave again. But it all started back up with the Pineapple

and awkward Pine pineapple trimming. Yeah, because he says, I'm grateful for my my effective stew or something like that or the stews and she's like, Yes, such a fever days. Yeah, fever. What was that? Did you say something, dude? So, so the captain's like, okay, the guests are gonna board on anchor due to weather. Okay, so there's gonna be wind. I don't know if I told you about today on the screen in my in my screen room, but you know, there's gonna be 27 knots. Okay, so we're gonna have a window to get out to sea and I don't want to be stuck at the rock. Okay, that was a lot of yacht sling.

Everybody catch that. There's a window and anchor and a rock. Make it happen. And then meanwhile Natasha's phone and it's like two messages, three messages, four messages. Her messages are just like piling up. And then provisions arrive. It's time for provisions. And the cows like, all right, you don't want to wash. I'm going to need you to make some slow moves today. Okay, nothing too fast, because I'm hungover and not sick. Oh, 25 days, I see my family. And Natasha has just ordered too much of every drink. She's like obsessed with having enough to drink. So they can't fit all the drinks in places. They're like trying to put them under the couches and shit because she can't stop ordering drinks. And Natalia's pissed. She's like, all the kind of person that you get what you need, you just don't add, add, add. I like what do you need. And

then you add more. Who does that? Touch is the worst professional. It's not hard to say this fog bottle is on shoes. Right? You need five bottles. One for the fridge upstairs, one for the fridge under the couch, one for the fridge in the sink, and I was like, okay, Natalia, like I got it, but rapid it. We're having it. I'm bored with all your fridges. Why could deliver glass of orange juice to every piece in Australia and still make too much? I'm like, okay.

So, then Courtney is like, oh, just so you know, we got a heaps and heaps of the Coca-Cola, just so everyone knows, and Natalia is like, oh, just so you know, we got we got heaps and heaps of the Coca-Cola just so everyone knows and Natalia's like, well, Tross May, I've tried to size something. I've already tried to set up deliveries to free on. She's for all of Australia. Has it worked yet? Tross May, I've tried everything. Court me is organizing the outdoor fridge and she's off busy in Natalia's like, oh no! Like this is what sets Natalia over the edge. I love it. Too much gap. So then the captain's like, okay. Yeah. So the captain's like, okay, I'll crew, I'll crew. Get ready for departure. Storm, storm, single up your line, storm, storm. Here we go.

Big test. Don't fuck it up, storm. Storm's like, this is my moment. This is my moment. Hey crew, you want to see something fun? Okay, watch listen to this? Hey, I'll so it's time for us to get out of here because there's storms coming You hear that everyone storms like What is this about me being a person am I about to be fired? Oh God love just riling him up just by seeing storm instead of weather It's so much fun so much fun to do this. Okay, I'm gonna rile up Dave now for fun. Okay, all crew, all crew, is it safe to swing? That'll be good. That'll be good.

Let's see if Natalia answers that one. So they're leaving, they're leaving Malta where they're leaving Voleta and Jason pulls up a line and then he spits, and it's just like, ew. Yeah, I just think that's a side, yeah, gross. Like wait, there's some fish that's gonna have to have your spit now.

You know, some poor plankton or jellyfish, that's gonna be like, and you know, it's always like, when something unlucky happens, like five unlucky things happen at one time. So it's gonna be some fish with like a straw stuck up his nose. And then he's going to, you know, be caught up in those plastic rings

from the Diet Coke's like everything bad that can happen. And he's going to be covered in oil slicks. That fish, you mean? Yeah. And that fish is going to be the one that comes in the office and everyone's like, Oh, God, what is it now? It's like, Hey, guys, that's over a rough weekend. Like, why? Why? Why is that fish such a Debbie downer?

I was like, you guys, a fish is limping. It's got plastic rings around its neck, a straw stuck up its nose, and oils like all over it. Can we give the fish a break? The fish falls down the stairs. So like, oh God, of course you did, Frank, of course you did. They're like, listen, just don't tell Linda about lunch because I just can't have her energy today.

Like she was such a downer. Like you say, how's it going? And she says tired. It's like, I can't with Linda. So they go through the doubt. That's just making him attitude for a monthish. That's spout. Hey guys, how's your weekend? I got spout on actually. Oh God, Linda. So don't worry I'm still hashtag blessed. That kind of fucking hate month fish.

What happened here? Bow silence, Linda. You know, Linda puts up that poster with the kittens, but she has such a bad attitude. Do in mind if I put this, put this, this rigotony in the fridge, Linda, it's got so much garlic. So, hey, guys, it's got a new wash your own dishes signed for the kitchen. It's meant nice. Love the font. When Linda comes over to your desk, ask a question, she's eating an apple very loudly. So I was thinking about our accounts. Do you have the receipts? Linda, could you eat your apple before you come to me?

Linda just wants everyone to know she's eating something healthy today. Well, I have to eat this because my diet has been messed up because apparently I had just a too much oil slick when I got near the surface. Linda, why are you making a show of eating your apple when we all heard you unwrapping a milky way into your bestus man? That's not what you heard. Those were my meds from having a Coca-Cola ring around my neck for too long. We don't the sad bunk fish. The sad bunk fish in the office. Okay, so they're very important line storms like Jason, make sure you hit the stainless all this stuff we polish is now not

polished because now we're going to go big people up at anchor. You know what I mean? So guess a not arriving the regular way they're arriving by tender. You know what I mean? So guess a not arriving the regular way they're arriving by Tinder. You understand Jason, right? He's like, you're such a scallop in the morning. What have you been talking about? See everyone hates me. Everyone hates me. The time for scallop banter is over. So we also forgot to mention, you know, when they got through the dolphins, we have an inspirational moment from Zee who himself has inspired. He's like, obviously, seeing friends succeed is always super inspirational,

and you see other people doing things, and you want to be at that standard. So I want to get a promotion or so, because I did dishes when I grew up. So it's really inspiring to do dishes one day, and then you could have a job another day. It's my story. I Like that. They're like here's the Z's jealous bitter moment. He's like, hello strong so much. I'm glad to see you succeed I thought I could erase one day. That bitch. Okay, put it in. I know Z what a bitch. We're gonna give you the feeling of it Zero such a nasty bitch We're gonna give you the feeling of it. Zero such a nasty bitch. So then storm and sandy, storm storm sandy storm storm sandy, come to the bridge, please

come to the bridge. So she is storm. Hi, hi storm. I'm gonna talk to you in this voice. I'm getting fired. Where in the middle of my documentary? No, no, you're not getting fired, okay? This is just how I talk when I want people to understand they could kill us without the

knowledge that I've got about to come out three, two, one. Okay, we're going to drop two anchors. You're going to be okay with that. You know, back in the day, I used to call this anchor sanctuary, which we love. So I'm gonna drop one and then come out, undo shackles, okay? And it's gonna be a V. And in case you weren't sure about the V, I'll do it with my hand, look at that, it's a V. I guess I sort of make a Y when I do this,

because I have my body, but you get the point, we're gonna do a V with the anchors. And then, so the pros are, we won't drift and hit some rocks. The cons are, the wind can blow and and tank the anchor and we all die. So it's a little tricky. Yeah, you might kill everybody this episode. How do you feel about that?

God, I love teaching people. Teachable, mom, man. Hey, what letter is the anchor going to make? Oh, be. Oh, God. We have some more work. We might lose some people. Go ahead and try it. Go ahead and try. Try the B anchor. Here's a good way to remember. You know, you're, you know, your buddy Z. Okay's the shape we're making, huh? He says storms like, CZ, Fond your bearings,

you wake them, wake me up with the bell, Traces. It's like, God, he's so good at his job, look at him, go. He's like seeing the master and commander theme song. Bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum. Although that may have been pirate, the Caribbean, either way, it's some sort of seafaring movie soundtrack. So, Storm's like, we need to be very vigilant. If the wind increases, one shackle has to come up. One shackle Z, one shackle Z. So, are you saying I have to use my skill set of pulling a dish out of the dishwasher

but apply it to a shackle? Yes, that is exactly right, bring the shackle up. Two shackles in. Okay, okay, poor dinker, got it exactly right. Bring the shackle up. Two shackles in. Okay, okay, poor dinker. Got it. Starbird anchor. Got it. Does it look like a V? Got it. Okay, now drag the hug anchor. That was just a test. Get in here. Coming for one. Yeah, man. So then Jason, you see Jason doing some polishing and then Storm gives us more of his like mindset. He's like, when I was just a deckhand,

I had the mentality of trying to be the best man on my team. It was just my upbringing. I was brought up in a very competitive environment. When I was four years old, I listed in my first drag race. It was very scary, but I did it as a competitive driving environment. And it makes me, makes it trickier to trust people, but at the same time, that's what you learn. When you learn to be a person, you learn to be a person in a competitive environment.

I just want to be a good person, a person who drives cars fast and drives cars fast for mother. That's how I need to be, a good person. I'm going to be the best person I possibly can be, I'm going to make a big I'm gonna make a big So storms like getting your whites and Natasha is doing her last round hump day hump day, okay? Oh, no, that's the chef This chef's like all right everybody get you and I want to see a positive attitude today Hump day hump dates all down here from here, it's all down here from here sunshine. And it's like, you're like, he's positive, that irritates me bad, it would try to be sad. Well, I fell in love all over again over an old lady trimmed pineapple mate. Yeah, the strange potato. So then, now Storm is going down to deck and he sees Jason's polishing work and it's like shoddy at best.

And he's like, what's going on here? NBC Jason. Now the Reagan's gone. Jason's getting the Reagan edit, which is basically now he's eating a taco or as I call it elevated California cuisine. And he's eating it correctly because we learned off that Netflix show, Salt Fat, Acid Heat. I think that was the show that you eat tacos

when you move your head sideways, not the taco. Okay. Excuse me, I believe that was a lesson learned by Emmy Award nominee Pat Malakshmi on her show Taze the Nation. When she went to El Paso and tried a taco and said, oh, he's got to move your head to the side. Am I right? Poor Gale, she just puts her head at the bottom.

It doesn't mind what uses dribbled down her chin all the way onto her dress. Actually, it improves her fashions. Gale just lifts her entire head up and looks at the sky, like she's being fed by Mama bird and just drops the taco down. Really? It's quite fascinating. She treats the tortilla more like a funnel right to her mouth.

Put that gullet back and aim that tortilla right at the gullet and job is done. There's a reason she's called the Galbic disposal. So Jason is my part. the so uh... jason is not but he is getting the evil at it and it's so funny that they're trying so hard to give him a anna they just cut the hanna fairie standing out on the boat smoking a minute just not even on this season well hanna's relying on on your perspective to know what's going on i just saw an article on cheat sheet where hanna's like i didn't watch Blodick made,

I'll just listen to watch what crap is. And if Ronnie says he doesn't like someone, then I don't like someone. That's how life should be lived right there. So, Storm's like, why would you just do 50% of the job? I'm not a 50% kind of the job, kind of person. I have trained for this job since I was a two year old baby.

Jason, Jason, I've got a thousand, a thousand things to ask you. And if I ask you to do polishing, you need to take notice because nothing up here is polished. Look at this, and Jason's like, nothing's polished because I haven't got to it, dude, okay? He says it like duh. Like Storm asked him to do it so long ago, but he's like, yeah, of course it's not polished

because I just didn't do it. He's like, he kind of like takes the accusation and then owns it and turns it into an excuse. Like, not all this is done. This is a complete shit show. It's like, yeah, it's a shit show because I haven't done anything to it. So whaticho. It's like, yeah, it's a shicho because I haven't done anything to it. So what else? It's like, oh, okay.

So Courtney is like, chase and just doesn't know the way Yarding has meant to go. And he's like 35. I understand because it's like taking him so long to learn everything else. I understand why it's taking longer than 35 years. Like learn how to not be dick, but we'll see. Maybe this is the year. Oh, she's going to be an asshole, right? I thought, I mean, I know that you're not a big Jason fan, but I think she's an asshole. And I think she was an asshole the last time she was on the show too, you know, fools everybody with her like twerky little giggle, but I'm not. I'm not. You're not nice. Okay. How about you be nice to somebody?

Why don't you go tell Jason he looks like a scallop in the morning. And let's see how far that gets you. You know, I mean, she is such a scallop. See, that's how you do it, Jason. That's how you do it. So now I create the FJF deck. Okay, F deck. So the guests are approaching on tender. So now I've created the F-Dec, okay, F-Dec.

So the guests are approaching on Tinder. But first they have to get to the Tinder and they are, like, they're so excited. Oh, Missa, how do I even walk on these rocks? They're just like making all sorts of funny jokes. Like, ma, I'm just getting on the boot already. This group of guests is just a basic like That's the sound effect through the rest of the episode. Yeah, so all right crew to after crew to after and Everybody's just trying to get them on right and Natasha's getting more and more texts with some music turned sad

And it's just like, bloop, bloop, bloop, bloop, bloop. And she tells us, the hardest thought of being in a long distance relationship on boat says, you just don't have enough time to keep in touch with people. People have things going on that comes where like, baby's being born, grass being cut, mold's being, moles being attended, families, shopping

Sears together. My grandpa was a yachty. He was a yachty back in the day on the Queen's boat. And he actually wasn't there when Middad was born. Middads are twins. He was there for the first twin to be born, but he had to leave before Middad came out. That's a little time you have. had to leave before my dad came out. That's a little time you have. It worked six months on, six months off for the queen. And he was one of the two orangey-fifty green-makers who ever saved on the yard. At one time he got off the boat and he went to a store. He was called Hatzerass and he bought a hat. The store closed shortly thereafter, making him one of the 130 people who ever went to hats aras. And then he brought that hat onto the boat, making him one of the one people who ever wore hats, the hats are us on the rope, but Daniel. And then the

queen said, I like that hat, but I hate it on you. And so we threw it off the boat. And now there's a fish wearing the hat, the hat, the hat, so us. What's the point of my monologue again? I'm just gonna let it go. I mean, listen, Natasha, I believe you can do anything except the math. Okay. I know. She can do that. She can do the jellyfish. Just stories that go. The story changed direction 10 times. I could learn a hundred percent to work on the Queen's boat. But of course, I never worked on the Queen's boat, but of course I never worked on the Queen's boat, but of course Now she's past I have to bring her down for a second. I wish I could let's have a drink in memory of the Queen. I call it

Banana banana monkey penis Why are you making a shot out of potatoes? It's banana monkey penis day All right. All right. I Didn't know you could have a peel of potato so easily That's right because what I'm peeling is definitely a potato and I'm a man of death. It's time for commercial It's time for a crap and commercial So they line up to welcome all the guests they'd line up the stairs this time because I have to do it differently. And the guests are on the tender going, we are driving. We are driving.

So they're always more. I'm telling you people live up to their names. So they're always more I'm telling you people live up to their names So they love they love a cheer that describes Their motion we are on a train on a train So they arrive and they shake their hands and they're like we are shaking shake shake And the captain's like wow what a way to arrive on the yacht, right? Big, little boat, big boat. Hi, hi, little boat, meet big boat. Okay, welcome, you guys are gonna be taking a gigantic boat out,

just kidding, that was Captain Humor. Okay, so Natasha's gonna show you around motor yacht home, okay? Doesn't that have a ring to it, everybody? I'll be on the hug screen, coming when they need, coming if anybody needs to, a virtual hug or to know what kind of wind we've got right now. Okay. And ladies, before you go on your tour, I have something from the galley. Unfortunately, we didn't have any tropical fruit this, this trip, but I do have them nice variety of potatoes. You can enjoy.

Damn, you're serving pineapple. And Kyle has this, Kyle has this like low grade hatred for them because they're not gay. It's so fun because he just had like the best gay cruise ever. And now it's like you take him from the gay abiza cruise and then you put him on a carnival cruise. You know, like a carnival family cruise

and he just hates it. And he gives them their wine, you know, because they've poured wine for them. And he's like, oh, look at you all nice now, but you're going to be really messy later. But he's got like this mean streak to it and I loved it. It's like, yeah. Yeah. Well, because he got a taste of the other side, you know, like, because not only did he have the gaze, not only did he fall in love, but for a moment he got to feel like what it was like to be like, I don't want to say a power gay, but a gay with disposable income that goes on yachts because he was like in the group and he was hanging out with the group and now he's back to serving and not only just only just serving, he's serving a bunch of woohoo's, and he's like,

I hate life. And you know what, understandably, understandably. Now, where are they talking about Twilight? Because I know the latest is like, I mean, I got lightheaded watching Twilight, so, and then another one says, yeah, but I get lighthearted for a different reason watching Twilight, and they another one says, oh yeah, well, I get like, hearted for a different reason watching Twilight.

And they all start cracking up. But isn't that what the first one was saying? It's very confusing. I wasn't sure. I feel like it was something about like blood, like maybe you saw. I don't know. I felt like there was something important

that was missing to understand what this joke was. I just wrote it down and it was like, I will declare that this happened and I'm gonna move on. So they're unpacking and Kyle hates it. I just wrote it down and it was like I will declare that this happened and I'm gonna move on So I'm packing and Kyle hates it. He's like babe. She's got like five centuries worth of clothes in here's ridiculous babe And the girls like oh my god. You look hot as fuck woman. Just oh my god. I'm gonna come you look beautiful Oh my god, I'm gonna come. You look beautiful. Oh my god. Oh my god, I'm gonna come now.

I'm gonna come. I'm coming right now. We talked about Twilight, I already came twice. Ah! They are, by the way, talking exactly the same as the guys. I just wanna point that out. I know, they're us. They're us on a...

They're us. So Kyle's like, oh my god, these girls are the sisterhood of the tripling paint spa Gilmurcules on crack or swear So Sandy is Santa Sandy brings Courtney and the into the real house and she's like, hey guys, you want to see something really cool? There I say hot See how I have a view with the anchors It's because I dropped one port and the other one starboard. Yeah, that's a lot. I just take it in

Yeah, isn't it funny that it's a V but it's in the shape of a penis and nuts It's not funny. It's a jelly thing. It really goes to show you. You know God has a scent of humor with anchors At least hey, do you think any of these guests are actually illiterate people talking in V and such? Oh, so Kyle and Talia are talking. He's like, how you feel, Bob? I was like, I want to throw mine. I was sorry, that night. I'm only asking you so you can ask me how I feel, Bob.

Come on, I'm just like, how do you feel? And he says, I'm just trying to feel what's sub-drained. Why am I sub-drained? And Tali was like, well, hey, Folly, is triple-debo heaps of basic, simple, nice things, not 20 fucking cook-tale. Welcome drinks for your gay friends. And then we see shots of Natasha's crazy shots. Shots shots shots.

Yeah, girls like well, she is putting in a provisional debate because someone needs to take over that provisional. There's some one needs to take it over because I'm over it. This provisional is ridiculous. I've never seen so much Coca-Cola in my life. I mean, we've got all the cheese for an entire country. What is everybody taking that red fl Flint stand vitamins at one time tonight? Yeah.

This just in everyone in Australia, just got kidney stains from drinking too much vitamin C. From all the oranges, we've had to send him from this bit. Hmm. Uh, well, you know what, somebody take over the professions. And I would say something, but I don't want to get into the bed books not saying something could make things worse so I'm not going

to do it I'm just going to set him be really upset about Coca-coda that's it so I'm going to do and he's like I'm with you, God I wish I had love babe, we were talking about bag. I'm lonely. I'm lonely I miss Frank Smoy. I mean, honestly, you could take away everything. And as long as you keep that smile, I'll never feel so at him and so comforted. And so it peace coil, you got to stop talking about that. I'm long, long about provisions.

Okay, so I've got to, I've got a quiz for you. It's a multiple choice question. So the ladies take shots. Do what sound do they make? A, the sound of chorus, honking, honking, B, the sounds of birds chirping, or C. Woo! Woo! It's tough. I'm gonna go with woo. You're right. Oh my god. And then the girls are like, like, do you guys have like a beer bomb? Can we do like a beer bomb from the top down to the bottom and it's

just like, I don't have a beer bomb. Even though I love the partner, but one has a friend named Stephen and his beak and bald and beautiful and he's here to party, they're like, okay, cool, that sounds fun. Now, in my mind, I'm like, I've always thought every time they're brought out the dildo, I always feel like they're pushing it. I'm like, I just always think it's crazy

for like the staff to bring out the dildo unless it's like as far. I just think it's crazy. But now it's like the thing is, if the dildo was going to be brought out, Kyle has to be the one who has to like lay the groundwork. He's like, I got something really great like that you can drink from. You got to see it. Okay, then you'll be a real man. But when I, but when like Natasha pitches it for later, you know, it's not going to go right. Yeah. She just does. And also he doesn't really have what it takes to pull it off either because he hates them. Like he visibly hates them. He hates them. So he's not going to sell it. Yeah. Right. It could be like the comedy gay. He's like, girl, she's going to have fun sexy, time on. Sure. Listen to you. Woo in. I need love it. They become like, girl, you're gonna have a fun sexy time on. So listen to you wooing, I need love it. They become like,

oh, are you straighter gay? And then he could be like, oh, guys, how cool, friend. You know, they have to have that kind of relationship, but you can't even have him do it this episode. Like you can't have the gay that hates you, come out and be like, wanna drink out of a dick.

I mean, no. It's not gonna work. Well, actually, the truth is the way you, I mean, also Natasha kind of hyped it Yeah, that's not going to work. Well, actually, the truth is the way you, I mean, also, Natasha kind of hyped it up because she said his name is Steven. And so that's like, you know, now you put expectations on it because Kyle would have been like, you can go, well, I don't have a, I don't have a, but we do have, I don't have a bee ball, but I do have a deal day. You want to drink

it. A deal day with Halei areas. And they'd're like, woo, but the fact that they've waited all day for whatever Stephen is, and then they find out it's a build out like it's not gonna work out so well. Uh, she said, it's a secret thing. How does some people get that? Should I bring them soon? And the mom's like, where are we going to sit? Where are we going to sit for lunch? And what time is lunch? What time is lunch? And where are we going to sit? That's what I need to know. And say, Well, we can do it whenever you want. I just need to know what time. Could you just tell me what time we're gonna sit?

Okay, and where are we gonna sit? What time and where? Where are we gonna sit? Is anybody gonna tell me? I'm the mom, I need to know what time we're gonna sit. So then they are, there's a jet ski, because you know, Courtney's story continues, gonna put a Jetsky in the water,

and the lady's like, it's going in the water. The Jetsky is going in the water. Err, err, err, err, err, err, Jetsky in the water. Watt, watt, watt, what, herr. So one of the ladies sees Kyle. He's bringing out drinks, and she says, could we take a shot with Steven and Kyle just rolls his eyes and he's like, oh, okay, I'll get Steven for you. And he's all upset

because he's like, I'm not doing this for straight girls. I'm not doing this for straight girls. For Gaby Ball. So then the girl is like, well, yeah, cause I actually have, have there been an all female charter yet? I just don't remember. I know that there was, there was a gay charter to start and then there was like a charter

where there was like the rich brats. And then I think there was just the gays that there may have been another one in there, but I don't think there, I don't think there's been an all female charter yet. I don't know. But I feel like whenever there's been a guy around, he lights up and now that it's all women,

he's much more dower, but I reserve the right to walk this back if there's already been an all female charter this season. So this girl, this girl's talking at that month. Yeah, there was. There was that month. Yeah, there was. There was. Yeah, because I think I remember him being fun with a group of girls. But anyway, they like moms.

Yeah, wasn't it? I don't like that. I don't like that. I don't like that. I have very happy questions about this show because I, I was like, my brain is a DVR for the show. I don't remember what happened last week, really. Yeah, I rescind, I rescind my theory. It wasn't good in the first place.

And it just got worse as I talked to that. So the girl. So one girl's like, do you guys want to hear something tragic? My botox appointment is for two days after we get back. Like, oh, you know what the tragedy is in that, but we'll empathize with you. Yeah. And the girls like, yeah, but we'll empathize with you. Yeah. And now the girls like, yeah, you know, it's also really tragic. I came talking about watching Twilight upstairs.

I'm so embarrassed now. I did in the galley, by the way, in the galley, Dave is like, so I'm going to be serving some bruschetta's because I really want to show off my skills. I'm like, you're going to chop up some tomatoes and garlic and put it on some bread. You go. You go. Yeah, and he goes, yeah, I'm really going to show off my creativity because LA food is deconstructed, simple food, and I can deconstruct it, but I'd rather construct it. I'm an artist. I'm like, okay, let me tell you what avocado is not. Avocado toast is not just for cubes, not cubes, but what do you call it when you cut an avocado into four?

Slice. It's not a fourth. It's not like a chunk of avocado. You have to mash it up. It takes something. He just like puts a quarter of an avocado on a piece of toast in sense of that. This guy also like you have Google?

L.A. style food is not necessarily deconstructed fresh food. I think that's maybe in the 80s or the 90s. I don't know where this came from. And he's like, deconstructed food is when you don't have time to set it in an actual mold, which is also not what deconstructed food is. I just feel like his perception of deconstructed food and of Los Angeles food is so wacky. Well, it's so funny that we're Americans talking about this, right? Like, oh my god, their idea of our food is so crazy when Americans take every other culture's food and just completely

craicify it, you know, appropriate it and like and just let it was like $1.00 down. Yeah. So let's see. So, uh, whole avocado is on toast instead of mashed. He's got a weird idea of a life.

Okay, so Shelby is filming the food. She's like, oh my god, let's go homies. You guys, look, it's avocado toast. Get it? There's an avocado on a piece of toast. This is fucking or I just came right now He nailed up scale L.A. She I cannot wait to tell my Botoxologist when I get home Nailed it nailed it. He held the assignment. So then storm is telling Tasha that She needs he needs somebody to do two trips

because they're going to do this beach setup thing, right? And so they start getting together for that. And so in the galley, Tasha goes into the galley and the chef's like, what are you doing in here? She goes, I need to put something on, just to that, bring my guess. So she starts putting on a deep friend and goes, well I don't wanna get my hopes up. I don't wanna get my hopes up why you're in here. Oh, Dave, what are you thinking? You're not gonna get a hold. You won't help, Dave.

It's not what you want. Oh, Dave! And if she runs, dude, I'm gonna go so this really long hug. I thought that he got a package and it was only an apron and I thought it was going to be something more exciting. It makes more sense that she was putting on an apron. So he's like, it feels like a new start.

He's putting on an apron and such. But I feel like it can be better. But I feel like it can be better. I feel very quickly. I felt very quickly and there's always a little hope that she'll run away from a boyfriend and look will be here with a big potato. So there's always that option. Hold me holding a big, prickly potato

that smells fragrant. Dave, I don't love your idea of avocado toast and you've scared me a little this season with your psycho behavior, but you know, even psychos deserve proper love. I mean, not for yourself, you know, even psychos deserve proper love. I mean, not more for yourself, you know what I mean? Maybe she'll finally get sick of that guy that she ran back to after breaking my heart and then I can just be here waiting like, crap, you know, come on,

Dave, get some confidence. Yeah, let's find you a new lady, okay, because this is not working. So then, then back to women eating whatever's on this test, I want to cast out. And then someone goes, it's like some sort of onion and caramelized brachetta. It's like, yeah, it's tomato, it's brachetta, it's tomato. Onion. Garlic.

So, yeah, now they're pulling stuff for the beach picnic and they're going to go through and set it up. And they're going to try to set up in one trip. So storm, storm is like, well, you know, there's something about setting up a picnic that makes me feel philosophically and poetic about my team. You know, I have a great team and at the same time, I can't expect people to move me because then everyone will die. And then if everyone dies, I have no team.

And then I have to do it myself. And then suddenly, I'm three years old again, driving a Volvo to school. While my mom works at the drugstore, I can't go back to that place. I can't. I just can't expect everyone to be as good as me. That'd be like, this is too much. Okay, Storm, calm the fuck down. I mean, he's sitting there planning this beach trip. Like, all right, see, here's what we're gonna do. Look at this

beach paper or I'm gonna make a chalk. You're gonna be here. You're gonna be here with the chair. I'm gonna be here with the chair. Then we'll see each other across. We're gonna say, what do we mean? We get together. It's chairs. We're gonna up for, we're gonna put them on the beach. Then the tent. It's like calm down. It's tenting some folding chairs on some beach. I know. Oh, now. Exactly. I mean, well, the women are still having lunch. And one goes, um, is this a meatball?

And the other one's like, it's a falafel. She's, oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Oh. So now Tos and Kyle, um, they go, she's like, I don't check on Brett Kyle. And he says, they go, she's like, I don't you can't break Kyle. And he says, well, can't we go to get no babe? I don't know how to be alone when I'm hurting. What's the point going on, break, when your heart's already broken, if you know I'm sighing? 25 days, let's see, sweet, sweet, frank,

and that amazing smile. I love that he always fits on his little silk pajamas before he takes it now. I know. I feel like he is fits on his little silk pajamas before he takes him out. I know. I feel like he is definitely the type of gay who like if you if you like knocked on his door and like and he has just woken up bad, he's in a very small silk kimono. Yeah. Yeah. With like three under his eyes. He's a character. So he's a real character this guy. So he's hilarious. Tasha Natalia are in the decorating box, you know, it's like, how many times you guys

gonna, you know, ponder the stuff taco, but I'm there. And Natasha is like, oh God, the 70s. I wish I was in the 70s because then you could really part have fun, not get annoying text messages on your phone from a guy who cheated on you and then you cheated on back and then broke up with the guy you cheated on and went and got back together with him before regretting it because it's the phone. The phone won't stop dinging. The phone is the problem. The phone is the problem. I love the 70s. I loved a better and a dance. And a disco ball.

Can't you hear it in my voice? How much I love disco? So then Z and Storm are telling up their picnic site. Very slowly and they're having issues and Z is like, at the moment, things feel very disjointed. You know, I hope that storm soon learns to delegate. It's like, drawing up when the dishwasher will be broken

and after, do it by hand and mom would be like, do the bows first, I'd be like, I want to do the plates first, but it's mom's all I had to listen. So I'll do the bows first, which is weird. It's weird, different order. That's how I feel right now. I mean, just chuckles.

So, um, storm is just going crazy. I don't know what his deal is, but he's like throwing chairs the blanket, the blanket is on me, a chair, chairs, I'm full of chairs, I'm going to do with the chair, a lot. He's like, Jesus Christ, man, we're putting up some chairs. So then, um, Jesus Christ, man, we're putting up some chairs. So then back at the boat, some girl named Aurora. Okay, so the ladies are all talking neck. Oh my God. Tell us like about you guys went to college together. When you tell us about Rachel in college, she says, okay, well, one time in college, Rachel was partying so hard, but then she needed to throw up. So then she like found a bucket, and then she continued partying. It was awesome, but then later we found out the bucket. It was my purse, but it was so funny. I couldn't afford to get a new driver's license for a while. A throw-up has an acid to it kind of ate through the friend of my driver's

license and made it look like I was missing an eye and so it was like really hard for me to get into bars that we had a really good time. I got a story about Rachel also like one time we went to the food hall at FSU and I was like I dare to get a second order of mozzarella sticks. So she like went up and she got a second order of mozzarella sticks and like she totally ate them. I was like, oh my god, you got a second order of mozzarella sticks. It was a whole layer. I think later that night she like threw up in your purse. It was so funny because it was like not just regular throw up. It was like double mozzarella-y, throw up. Oh, I was hilarious. Rachel is crazy. So then Tasha's like, that parties hilarious. God,

you really have to party. Well or was it in the 70s? Okay, so you're gonna go to the beach and have some cocktails think girls and Back on the beach. He is spelling home in rocks It's such a random arts and crafts moment. It's a philosophical quandary because when you're on the beach, it says you're home, but you aren't home because home is only the modiata, and yet that's not her, neither. Something to think about. What is home is where the rocks are to spell home. One time, guys, one time a Rachel once spelled home with her vomit.

She's crazy. It was in my purse. She threw up in so many little purses and we arrange all the purses with vomit in them to spot home. It was great. For Aurora, I just have to carry a garbage bag around for a purse. Just farting with, just farting with this fucking disaster, Rachel. So the guest can only dendering come over to the beach.

And Storm carries one of the guests over his shoulder. And she's like, A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A Fireman told five by fireman told so then I'm a friend of these girls you know so funny is that all of these girls and Kyle But this is like my group of friends and I'm really Kyle, you know I know like you know like we would all hang out together and have like the best time Kyle included that's how we do it we hurt the ones love. So Dave is making tapas and he's like, I love going to San Sebastian having tapas there. You can put so much passion into one dish and it doesn't take that long since you're not prepping as much. So there's more time for Miracleize.

I'd rather do 15 courses than one by one by one. As long as they're all served at the same time, really what I'm looking for tonight is hamburgers next to rotuna on a very, very large dish. Wait, this guy, here he is saying, like, I love tapas. I love that you could put so much passion into one small plate. I'd rather have 15 small plates in a row than one big thing. And then last week he's like, I mean, why don't we just do around the world and we'll just put it all out on the table. Yeah, you see he's confusing. So, uh, Tosh and Z are making s'mores on the beach and no offense, but she's doing it wrong. Okay, she gets these huge marshmallows, huge, she's

like, because we get to baby best. And then she put some on a graham cracker and then she gets a little blow torch thing, like a brulee torch or whatever you call them. And she torches the outside of it. And storms like, but don't have to be melted. She's like, this is right. This is the right way to do it.

And I was just waiting to see the gas like, oh my God, and you guys Rachel just barfed when she tried eating that. This literally looks like the time Rachel made a barf sandwich. I mean, because they basically make like marshmallow chip, which is, and yeah, it's like, and it's not even graham crackers. I think it's just like this gets, because can you even get graham crackers in Europe? it's just like this gets, because I can even get Graham crackers in Europe. I don't know, Europeans, let us know. But yeah, it definitely is all wrong.

And you see that they give one to one girl, and we don't hear a response. We just see her face like, oh, okay, I guess that, woohoo. Yeah, this is not getting a little, I'll tell you that, man. And this is not cool. Where's the guy who put that piece of avocado on the toast? And that was art. This is part. This is part. That was art.

So then Natalia is talking Jason for perhaps the first time all season. She's like, hey, we're looking at you, Jason. You know, you seem like a sort of guy who likes to enjoy a flower party. You're a mommy and from like, ski BD. That guy is shaky. You sort of look like him. He's like, wow, that was bullying. He's like, yeah, I don't know if I was just bullied or... I don't know why he's cool. I've totally dated the guy when she's like,

he broke up with me after we met 11 minutes. So it still breaks my heart every day. I can't trust anybody And then after he walked away from me. He said I would have gone away with it to you. I was like well He didn't even wait a while for me to take off my mask Very short relationship Right right So then the captain's like okay guys just finished the latest season of those are god what an ending right didn't really approve of it what's going on here on

the boat is it almost dark got that Jason Bateman sure makes to time fly he's oh god yeah tomorrow i've got a whole marathon of hogan's family i'm so excited but hey we got to we got to keep this going. Okay, it's getting dark. Okay, listen, they're still on short. That is not okay. They're on short.

And I'm not talking about the day in a short classic in Bum Springs, I don't want to go to that too. All right, storm storm, Sandy, storm storm, Sandy. It's getting dark. We need you on board. Do you copy? Could you please press the mic and then talk storm storm storm storm

Sandy this is like Kelly clerks and follow up album to the since you've been gone album it's getting kind of dark come on we need you to come back in storm storm Sandy storm storm Sandy did Laura Dirt deserve to die I mean not Lord Dirt what's the other one Laura what's your face Jason Bates maintenance Laura on OZAR did she deserve to die yes or no okay storm storm standing this is like revenge season two it's getting kind of dark come on in gotta bring it in storm storm standing wow that's through revenge opening okay storm can you me? I will not be ignored on a revenge opening Yes, storm storm Sandy Guess what just found out that the rest of this episode is gonna be directed by Christopher Nolan so it's getting kind of dark

And now we're up actually upside down and going through it just the hallway. So that's there's that And they're out of range so storm doesn't hear any of this so the captain's like um shaggy. Hey shaggy Could you go go on the tender and go tell storm? I am very very upset go get him you go get him you say you better be home before dark mister or I'll tell you what you are not getting a hug before dinner. You tell them just in that tone and then say just kidding hugs and then give them a hug. Okay, go do it. It's very important. You know what? It's never a great idea to have guests on the shore after dark because guess what? We don't have lights. This is a fun fact. There's no such thing as flashlights in Malta. So secondly,

something could kick up and now we're in the pitch black. Okay. So Storm should like always stay in touch with me, especially because I got to tell him how osar again did. Okay. God. What, what a nail bite. Are you have my right? The Baba Dukes coming. Okay, to see that Jason. Okay. So Jason goes over on the tender. He's like, hey, chapter Sanley, once you guys back on the boat, okay, got it? Got it? Okay, bye.

And he just leaves. And strums like, all right, I'll need to work on time management for sure, but you're not the owner of the boat, dude. All right, don't shoot over like your Brad Pitt and your own Malta. All right, because that's not how it works. Bro. Brad, the Brad Pitt thing was a little prep. It's like, whoa, man, don't bring me into this.

Okay. I know he's like, I've already had a rough week with Angelina stuff. Okay. Leave me alone. So the captain's like, oh, shack it. you're back, get up here. Okay. Did you say the Boba Duke is coming? No, I forgot that part. And what does he think? Does he think that Laura, what's your face should have deserved to die at the end of Ozark? I forgot that part. Did you go, boom, boom. No, I would do it. You know, damn it. Wow, wow. So now, now the storm is bringing all the women back in the dark. And they're like, whoa, it's dark. Spooky swimming.

This is not ideal at all. Rachel just puke done a monkfish. You guys see that? Oh, God. Linda, what happened to you today? Oh, I got puke done on my girl in my purse. Oh, terrible. A little fish versus all barfed.

Well, Linda, you could have cleaned it up before you came into the office. I didn't have time. I watched your brook. I guess I'll be doing my own purse in the office. My office kitchen. Hey, does anyone mind if I leave for lunch, a little earlier, I got to get a, got to go to DJ Max get a replacement for this, this person's pooped on by a human.

Oh, God. So everybody gets ready for this 70s party and the captain's like, storm, I want to quickchad in the morning storm. Are you going to get fired? Nobody knows. He'll know in the morning. Have a good sleep, everybody. So she leaves and then everybody else gets ready for the 70s party. storm. Are you going to get fired? Nobody knows. You're knowing the morning. Have a good sleep everybody. Bye.

So she leaves and then everybody else gets ready for the 70s party. And the chef puts on a wig and he's like, yeah, I've got all these surfed-y'd-mates. Now, I'm always jealous of the hair because I had hair, but it went, you know, I tried growing it back, but it was just like little fingers on the front of my head, you know, so I've always wanted to flick my hair and finger it it back get out of the water and just throw my hair back like I was like he really thinks that Notoshes and love with him again. When has the chef ever acted like this? It's like that's a new girl

Feeling good I've seen feeling good. Meanwhile Kyle gets into a wig, his favorite thing, and he's like, you know what, I'm constantly thinking a bit Frank, and I'm trying to make him seem like I'm having the best time of my life, but I'm thinking a bit Frank. I'm like, okay, Frank did not die.

You can text him. It's like he's acting like Frank has evaporated into thin air. You've known Frank two days, sorry. Okay? So, food's wetty, food's wetty. Sorry, Diana Jenkins is on the show. Oh, you need a new food, Wendy?

Yeah, I am, then. So, the chef is like, food's wetty. Please check the plates for hair because, you know, we're wearing wigs. We should go ahead and have people walk around with shit like this on their head. This is actually disgusting, but I'm in love, so I'll let it pass. All right. All right, ladies, this first dish of... Dave, why don't you put on a wig, Dave? I'm wearing a wig right now, actually. No, no, you're not, Dave. You should put one on, Dave.

My God, you're right. I retire, Dave. Don't hold it. Still bold. Did you say something, Dave? Wow. Dave comes out with three weeks on his head. Hey, Dave, why is that potato wearing a wink? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Go bear maybe listen today. Let's make lots of pie happy jokes. This is an hour and 15 minutes in and makes zero. Well, there was 20 minutes doing with your lives. There was 20 minutes of talking about the ms. So stupid. Okay. Those were 20 minutes where Stephen Colbert thought this was a possibly normal podcast.

And now he's like, wow, don't talk to strangers at parties. Okay, so they get their sushi, their deconstructed sushi. Okay, so you don't have to fucking roll it. What are you doing? What are you doing? He just gives them a seafood of seafood sheet and then some sushi on the side. What the fuck? I didn't even notice that.

What I did notice that he served something. He goes, I call it God enough pickled vegetables. God is a pickled vegetable. It's not a pickled vegetable. Oh my God, this is fucking my face right now. This is art. This is fuck my face, art. But I'd like that he says he's going to eat calls it something as if there's some sort of artistry or like poeticism or like widdicism,

with witness about the name. So I played a pickled vegetables and instead of saying like, I've served you some pickled vegetables, like no, I call it God in the pickled vegetables. Like he did, it could have been like, it wasn't like a plan that we're eating or anything. And he's like, and then he goes, and here's some watermelon broth,

which sort of goes against the theme of God and a pickled vegetable's butt. You know, here it is. It's like a garden, watered with vinegar. Like, mmm, delicious. Fuck my face, carrot. So then the cat, he's talking about how the last charter was tough,

but now everybody's everything's great and everyone's doing fine. He's getting along with Tosh and guests are happy and it's just so important to be friends with the interior. God, he just loves the interior. He respects him so much. They have to work so hard. And how do they do it? Oh my God. I mean just so much to do he could he just respects it. So did they secretly fuck I have a feeling I'm calling it that they started up again and they're hiding it better the last time. I think he's just like I think he's just leaning into the hair thing. He just feels like he's got like a renewed vigor. So by the way you you you were totally went past an important part of Z's character building, which is Storm and Z in the wheelhouse looking at the anchor radar.

And, you know, it looks like scribbles, and so one of them is like, I think Storm says, he looks like a grade zero drawing of a bunny, and Z's like, I draw like that. I draw stick people's too. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Well, I wasn't attacking you, mate. I didn't take it that way. I'm happy for your success. Oh So then they talk about the bread because they get some bread served to them and the mom's like oh my god

You know here we are sitting in these dining room chairs at 8 o'clock p.m. God, I just feel so good about knowing all that because I'm a mom. And this bread is delicious. It's told me it's like the bread I used to make for you, Shelby, right? Shelby's like, yeah, mom, just like this, just like this. God. What a fucking lunatic, am I right friends? Shelby language. I can hear you. So then, you know, there's some twerking because like, well, first of all,

it's hallia and court near twerking. And now the girls wanna party. They're ready for their 70s parties. There's a lot of woohoo. And then it's like dancing and like, yes! Yes, yes, yes! Woohoo! And Kyle's like, these people make me cringe. I'm like, they're the exact same people as last week. Yeah, you just don't want to stick your penis in any of them, okay?

Yeah. So he's telling Dave, oh, I just don't think they're like Steven's type. You know, she wants to put it, Steven. I mean, these are a bunch of 11 year old girls stuck in 22 year old bodies. I'm a god. I hope my boyfriend texted me I know I'm like just go to the wheel Um, so I was like this is not a toy. They know better. They better know Steven's a deal dude. It's been sucked by thought I mean, Thor, Thor, this is the worst thing you can do because I can profile a person and two point

two seconds and know that it will love my life. And this time I did and I'm like, you should not be doing this with a bunch of non-francs. I love his talent. It's like profiling who's a dildo person and who's not a dildo person. I know. It's a very specific kind of CBS show. Yeah. All I can know in 2.2 seconds if you can spend 12 years with someone they're going to leave you for a woman. So she's like, yeah, I'm gonna do Steven. He's like, don't do it. I'm telling you, don't do it. She's like, I don't think, she's like, they're gonna love it. They're gonna love it. So she fills up this syringe thing with tequila.

And so she comes outside and she's like, girls, this is saving. And then she whips out the dildo and they're like, ah, ah, oh my god. Is there a line? It's rich, it's rich of the pukes, which is not even puking. Oh, I thought he was a pirate. They are so grossed out. They are so uncomfortable. He grossed out. I was cracking up. And then the girl who didn't get her Botox in the boat, the who made her Botox appointment to me is so funny because she's trying to make it better for Tosh. And the other girls like, no, stop it, Donna. Or whatever. Oh no, stop it, Rachel. They're like, stop. And she's, Tosh goes goes anyone want to try and they stare

Blakely at her and she's like you take the salty tip you lick it and Shelby's like oh my god. This is like so bad. We thought Stephen was like a nice pirate or something I'm Rachel's like come on guys. Let's just do it. Let's just do it guys like Rachel's out. No Rachel Quiet Aurora. I want to be I want to do it a while. No Rachel you've done too much Like the best part was that there was a commercial break it like when the when when when Natasha brings out the dildo The girls are like and it was commercial so I'm like, okay It's you one of those things we come back from commercial and they're gonna be like But that no they are just like...

They go to bed! They go to bed! Oh my god, I was cracking up. That is so golden. They literally went from, wow! See, we're going to bed. I'm just... And Kar was like told,

that, told, I knew it was going to be painful. That was almost as painful as that deal though up your ass. All right. It was terrible. Babe. Oh goodness. So, um, so then, uh, yes, adjacent is asking Kyle how how tonight was and cause it was boring. All right. Like, torch wanted to take it to stay even. asking Kyle how how tonight was and Kyle said it was boring or I like Tosh wanted to take it to save in and she did it and it was a complete fail and I say don't I suggest you don't do this from the beginning I mean honestly it's so

difficult for me because you know I just came from the biggest high of the lace charter and then with all these immature tweets the the immature in fact you know what that's a new word, image ill girl called image ill, okay and it tweets, I don't like them and Jason's like, yeah, my thing has nothing to do with yours but I'll say it like it does because like all the decans are like, they're just like sensitive, they're so sensitive, they're like not open to my jokes and like, I'm like, I'm like, look, I'm like, I'm like, I don't know what the word I wrote is in my notes, but I'm doing that word, and like with certain people, and I'm just like not 100 percent of myself.

Yeah, I feel like I'm like playing a role, you know, like I'm Jason, but here, like I'm just a guy who doesn't really like polish, you know what I mean? And that's the role I'm playing. Because the people I get along with outside, the people I get along with are not outside working with me, but like the things I know how to randomly do, like sewing, juggling, those are things that I've learned. Those are things I've learned because I actually enjoy those things.

And I just haven't been able to find common ground with people. I get really, really hard to find a juggling sower. You know what I mean? It's just like shocking that you go on to the yacht to work. And there's not one person who knows how to juggle three bolts of yarn. It's like what's even the point? Like Courtney likes to twerk. I'm like, what? Do that with three oranges flying in the air? You know what I mean? So then Storm gets into bed with Talia and really nothing happens.

It's just her trying to get gospel. I wonder what's happening with Tosh and the ship. He's obsessed with it. He's like, he's in love with her. Don't you think he finally realizes what she's done? You know what I'm saying? He's like, all right, I'm going to go now. So crowd takes off his wig and the mirror and goes, the bitch is big.

Rowsed on the ground. Okay, so now it's day two and there's yoga. Everybody gets to do their paddle board yoga stuff or whatever it is. And so everybody's getting up and Tasha wakes up to a nice breakfast of nine new messages from our crazy ass boyfriend. So and you know, like we see how Natasha makes people crazy on purpose. And I and, you know, like we see how Natasha makes people crazy on purpose, and I'm wondering if she's texting him like, I'm in need of help, SOS, please come, please come, if they don't get the money, they'll chop off my head. And then just doesn't finish.

And he's like, I'm worried about you, I'm worried. I don't know why it's so worried, it's feeling annoying. Listen, I just was pretending I was in the 70s and there's no such thing as cell phones. So I couldn't text them back with real indolusion. So I mean, basically she loves, I think she loves like the love bombing attention at first. But then when it gets to be too much, she's like, whoa, and then she like backs off and then they do it even harder. And then she's like, whoa, so this case, she leaves

a voice text for her sister. And she's like, Ah, squish. Can you just message and tell him to stop sending me NASA messages like I'm working here, everyone to out under the sun. I can't do with any more of these messages, squish. I hope you understand, squish. Thanks so much much squish. And by the way, I did get your text message, but I don't like being called squish. So I'll try to take that under consideration, squish. Baaah. So of course, as was the intention, Natalia heard this. And so she's like, hey, squish! She says, my boyfriend, she's what? Your boyfriend? Just, uh, yeah, my boyfriend.

And so Tali is like, oh my god, Dave, boyfriend, Dave, boyfriend, orange juice, orange juice, orange juice. You know what? They probably opened up their mailbox and they had like 37 columns of orange juice. At this point, she has so many boyfriends, you could probably mail one to every single person. And so many lefties. So now the ladies are leaving on the tender to go to their yoga stuff. And the captain is finally time for the meeting with Storm. So she's like, Storm Storm, captain Storm Storm, captain come up here to get be headed in the just kiddin. Okay.

Hi, welcome. You're here. Okay. So listen, and I'm'm gonna talk in this voice because this is the teaching voice, you know what I'm a teacher. So I don't expect you to know this, okay? You can't get out of radio range, okay? Remember that, don't get out of radio range. When you are stuck listening to Amazon radio, you'll see what I mean. It's painful. How many times are you expected to listen to Amazon radio, you'll see what I mean. It's painful.

How many times are you expected to listen to Megan Trainor in one hour? Don't get out of radio range, okay? Because I like to keep a line of sight on my team just in case. I like to say, hey, where's that furry guy with a mustache but no hair on top? Oh, there he is. You know, that's fun for me. The minute the sun goes down, they need to be back. Okay, they're like the opposite of vampires. They're, they're just basics. Okay. Basic, suck your blood. Okay. They're like, you know, Anna Kendrick in Twilight. They're just sort of there.

Maybe we'll have a great future afterwards and other movies, but for right now, she's just sort of there. That's what they are. Now, Anna Kendrick, that's someone who deserved to die at the end of Ozark. Am I right? Okay, glad we had this talk.

Hey, you ever been to Forks by the way? Never mind. Do your job. So Storm's like, well, I'm so not used to being the best and I'm so used to being on a team but the both of you can rely on me so much to do whatever I need to do. So I just need to learn how to do a gate because if I don't delegate, then I'll just be doing too much then they're going to maybe what I do, then they're going to do too much and we'll be doing too much and we're going to set up too many picnics and I'll be out late to have tonight. And next thing you know, we'll be driving down the highway at the age of four and a half,

just trying to get to Mum's job so I can bring her lunch and oh, it's gonna be a disaster. Wow, this was a really fascinating delegation episode for Storm. Yeah. Like the writers room, like we really need a storm learning to delegate episode. Just make sure he's ready to go with about 16 monologues about it. Okay, let's go. We can do this everybody. Stay within radio range everybody.

So the ladies are at yoga doing yoga on paddle boards and Sandy's like, hey, the wind's picking up a little bit. You know what? I guess it didn't hear the stern lecture. I gave it when I said, let's drop it down from 27 Nats. Okay. Apparently it did NAT get the memo. See what I did there. So anyway, let's bring up the starboard anchor. Okay, let's bring that up. Okay. Or, or maybe even the poor anchor. Which one? Yeah. You know what? You know what? It's crossing around. It's crossed. It's crossing around. I can just tell. Okay, let's get down. You know what, Storm? You just learned to delegate. Would you like to lose a leg? Okay, jump in the water and just

go untangle that. It's going to be fun. Let's see if you can do it. New guy. Hey, Storm, do you mind delegating your arm to David Jones Locker? So, so Storm has to jump in the water and untangle this, which we all know from watching Bulladec for years and years, that this is very, very dangerous. It's almost killed one of the people on the boat. That guy who lived and then became a hero and then came back the next season and became a total douchebag. Well, that was a different thing. That was just where like, he put his foot into like, in the ropes, and then he got dragged.

But there was Wes. There was Wes Vanderpump, and he had to undo it. But the whole thing is that the moment that the anchor is loose, it's going to plummet down. So you have to be clear of it when that happens, otherwise you're fucked. So Sandy says, we're fucked. And so now Storm goes underwater, and then he's like, we see Storm cam and he's like,

near the anchor and then he does something and then the anchor lets loose and then there's like chaos and what happened, it storms your vibe. Is he alive? Is he coming to be replaced? Will he be the first Bravo celebrity to die during the show? We'll find out next week. Yeah, thanks guys. Yeah, they made it look like Storm just got killed and faded to

black. So there we go. All right, everybody, thank you for joining us for this, insane episode of watching. Thanks. Thanks. Thanks, Steven Colbert for making it through the 90 minutes. Look forward to being guest on your show. If you know Patricia Arquette, just tell her to give us a shot. All right, everybody.

Thank you so much for being here. We will be back tomorrow with a little real girlfriend in Pauly and then Beverly Hills on Southern Charm, of course. Go check out our bonus episodes, our videos, and also our other podcast Winter is Crapening, which is our Game of Thrones show. We sure love you guys, we'll talk to you next time. Bye. Bye. Watch what crap ends with like to think it's premium sponsors.

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