Watch What Crappens - Below Deck Med: Great Ex-pecations

Episode Date: August 16, 2022

Natasha goes running back to her ex on this week's Below Deck Med, and the twerker returns to the show. Will Zi's pant-tent be able to stay folded? This week's premium bonus is a breakdown of the Real Girlfriends in Paris trailer. Find all of our premium bonuses and video recaps at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cupi from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. I have cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cr Well hello everybody and welcome to watch what happens I'm Ronnie that's been over there. Hi, Bianne. Hi Ronnie. How are you? Good. What's going on with you, baby?

Not much just you know just podcasting with you Enjoying enjoying the day. What's going on with you? Oh My god, I'm just so embroiled in boat drama. Just getting ready to talk some below, Deck Med. Hi everybody, welcome to the show. We're glad to be here. Glad to have you here with us, we're all together. Thanks for everybody who joined us last night on Take a seat over on Spotify. It's our Monday night Spotify live show.

Join us for that if you don't. Super fun. It sets 7 p.m. Pacific. Okay. And what else? Oh, we also brought back our Game of Thrones podcast this week called Winter is crappening. That has its own feed called Winter is crappening. And we're doing the prequel to Game of Thrones House of the Dragon. First episodes up, it's a trailer breakdown, and then we'll be there every week. You know, it's a short gig, right? It's like a 10-week gig at most. Because who knows what the HBO max?

You know, sometimes it's eight. Sometimes it's 10, just never. No, okay. Also, HBO max is gonna be no more soon, because they are joining, no joining up with Discovery plus and I thought wow what a marriage made in heaven your app suck both of your apps suck So hopefully you can find one decent developer in there to give you a decent app. How about that? Okay, let's combine mediocre forces and get one decent app because I actually pay for both of those services and would love to have a decent app

Thank you. That is my PSA today also Listen, I'm all for consolidating apps, but if Joanna Gaines shows up on House of the Dragon We're gonna have an issue. Okay, let's not let's not over across Paul and here. You know what I'm saying She's gonna be like you know what I you know what the Lord told me to do is this house of the dragon ad ship lap We're gonna add ship lap to the kitchen, okay? And freaking what's this phase chip is gonna like knock over the iron through on his like, oh, that was funny on right That was funny. You knocked over in iconic pizza furniture for this series sir

Yeah, he is a bully that fucking guy. He seems like a bully He seems like a mean mean that fucking guy. He seems like a bully. He seems like a mean, mean person that guy. He really does. I mean, that story of him, I saw them on an Oprah interview because they were, they have their own channel or whatever that has to do with Oprah or something. Yeah. Yeah. The Mac. Yeah. And also the movie where frogs fall out of the sky. So there you go. Take that as you will. But yeah, they were in some interview and she's like, yeah, Oprah, you know, I just, we don't even own a TV Oprah.

I was like, shut up, shut up, Joanne. Fuck off, fuck you. And then Chip was like, yeah, and we didn't know what to do. And I said, well, honey, you need to ask the Lord and she was telling me, the Lord's not really telling me what to do, Chip. So I took her out to this field and, you know, we drove way out into the middle of this field, middle of nowhere, and she got out of the car and then I left her there.

She goes, yeah, and by the time he came back, the Lord, they talked to me because I said, Lord, I don't have a TV. Tell me what to do. Visio, the Lord told me, Visio, no, the Lord told her to have her own TV network. I was like, wow, Jesus is really into a shitty ship lap. Who knew? Well, we still don't have a TV, but what we did do is put a hurricane lantern in our bedroom, and we just stare at it for a few hours every night and say, God, I love prime time. I don't know why we're starting with that, but it was fun. And I love it.

I think it does actually kind of go into this because, you know, we always think that Chip is abusive. And there have been a lot of comments on below deck about, like, how could you guys only take Natasha's side? I'm team Dave, isn't that? Listen, I'm not saying that Natasha is correct. Natasha's crazy pants too. And I think Natasha was doing some shitty stuff on this season.

All I'm saying is that guy's a fucking psycho. He's a psycho. That's it. I'm not taking it back. Okay. You see the markings of a psycho abuser all over that guy. And the fact that people are still like,

uh, how could you? If that was a, if that was a woman, you would be treating this totally differently. And no, no, no, no, no, no. That guy's the fucking psycho, and I stand by it. Thank you. Yeah. I mean, isn't something that we've learned

that like the one of the most regressive mindsets is she led him on. Like, that's like not how we're supposed to approach these situations. I mean, but she had, but that being said, she definitely is not innocent in the situation, but like, but it feels like people are sort of forgetting that like two people can be terrible in a situation

and that Dave's, in my mind, Dave's terribleness way outweighs Natasha's terribleness, especially because she probably seems like she has some damage in her past. From taking too many courses. But there is a... It's not too many parties in the house. I'm just taking too many drainage shots in the house. Oh man, so many parties. People come over and that hopscores playing into at least 11, 30 or 12. So we open the episode. This is called Walkie of Shame, by the way, which I think is a funny title. So, um, Davis moving his clothes out of the joint cabin, and um, she's like, well, I think the baby cabin swapped today. It's happening today, man. And Kyle is telling Storm,

oh, she's got to move. Dave's gone, she's, you know, she's not going to move. Dave's going to swap. I don't have a choice in the mirror. Yeah, by the way, this Victorian drama gets taken up a notch this episode because Kyle brings in the classic Victoria drama thing. I have a pain, but I must be strong. I must be strong. Kyle definitely does add consumption. Yes. Yes. Kyle does add consumption into this episode of For sure. Yeah. So Dave and Tasha. So Dave's like, well, I did get most everything out. Do you think also Dave? Did you say something? I actually did. These are yours. Oh, I thought it was something romantic.

No, you can hear me now because there's actually a horse. Take them. She actually says to be fair. She says, I think these are yours. You think there is. It's like a pile of like a dea slip slip on. It's a jockstrap. OK, it's his. It's his.

It's his. So she's like, having to move carbons. It's kind of like a walk of shame. The old time of me wanted to have this secret, was because I didn't want to disrupt the grimoire with all the drama. I just wanted to serve brat blue shots to everyone. And essentially it just made things worse.

And she's like, I'm sure there's not your stave. And he's like, I don't even wear those sneakers. She's like, all right, well, I'll see if anyone needs shoes then. And then she's got like six pairs of tennis. What's that? I do like, why do you have so many? He's just like staring like those are my shoes, but I want her to have them.

Those were the shoes of the old me, the old me with the heart, the beat with love for one true love. Those shoes won't fit my heart anymore. Please be rid of the shoes. The shoes, the shoes, those shoes were made in salvaged tire rubber from a burnt car. Take them with love. Take those bullied shoes out of here.

So my heart can heal. So now Natasha is talking to Kyle and he's like, how you doing, babe? And she's like, I have to move on, improve to myself and everyone else. How can do this? I like to be a partner, I've looked side down, kick, sharp, don't make much sense, but God does it work. Come on.

But babe, through your darkest times, I'm honestly there for you, unless I realize I have to undermine you to get ahead in life. Okay, babe? You need to prove it for yourself. To your darkest times, your hardest moment, on the flower in the storm, babe, all I want to do is please you, right? I was like, oh God, now it's a game-marchen ivory thing. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha depression on the interview girl. But you love me. I've got your hair bang. It's like, wow, finally these movies are getting a little energy into them. Yeah, I know. Some strange casting. So cleaning, cleaning, cleaning. And now Sandy calls everyone for the preference sheet meeting. So Dave and Natasha have like a moment together. And Dave flips the script and he says, Natasha,

are you okay? What? Are you okay? What? Are you tired? Don't do that to me, Dave. That's what I do to you. I know what you're doing, Dave.

You're not going to let things affect the way we act on the gala, are you, Dave? No, we're awkward. He's like, no, unless it's awkward that my heart skips a beat every time your eyes shift. Did you say something, Dave? I said no, everything will be cool. Dave, you look tired. God, I got a pack. Thank God. So I read everybody. Welcome to Preference Sheet Meeting. This is called Preference Sheet Meeting

because we've got sheets in front of us. Okay. Now it's not just a preference meeting. Now what do I prefer? Hugs. Meeting adjourned. Okay. Now under the Preference Sheet Meeting.

Okay. Christina Rosette is an RA, an RA in the Bay Area. I can't really see it, agent. Real estate agent. That's what I, yeah. That's what my shorthand stands for. Real estate agent. I was gonna say RA sure got a raise.A. in the Bay Area. That can't be real estate agents. Real estate agents. That's what my shorthand stands for. Real estate agents. You're gonna say R.A. sure got a raise. Okay, didn't see that preference coming.

Yeah. She's a, listen, Christina Rosetta is a real estate agent in the Bay Area and she's celebrating her 50th birthday and her friend, perhaps sister, her fellow charter member, Dina. They want to have a dual birthday celebration. And she wants birthday cake delivered by a shirtless deck. And jokes on her, if you know what I'm saying,

who wants lots of hair in their cake. We got plenty of unworked out dead body season. Can't wait to show them to you. Hey, and they also want a studio 54 party with Glitter-Dake, or gosh too bad They didn't come here four years later that would have been so funny them turning 54 for a studio 54 party Oh, well numbers don't work at this time. You know what I'm saying? Not my preference mad about me. Okay, Storm Do you have an internet about that you'd like to share with only the audience and not us?

And he's like, oh, too. I've never been a boss in before, but she feels like she can trust me with this provisional title. I'm freaking out, but I can do it. You can do it, Storm. You can do it. Storm, I heard your inner thoughts. You could possibly do it. Okay. It's possible that you could do it. This is a provisional. You can do it storm. Okay. Oh, they want a cake. It's a day of it's like, well, I can do a sweet here. Vanilla. What vanilla? Vanilla. Three tears. Vanilla. Yeah. If people like vanilla, if vanilla, I can make a vanilla cake.

Ah, people love vanilla. Vanilla. Nofer. No better wafer for me to show my personality than making three tears of vanilla. Do you love vanilla? I love vanilla. I'm vanilla. I'm vanilla. Why can't she see the time vanilla? We can hear you, Dave.

What? Hey, Dave, did you say something? What? No. Been here from both sides now. Oh gosh, couples. I've had two in all of my time boating. I've had two that turned out in a very good way. And the other 20 or so, not good. Dave and Natasha, though, look at them demonstrating professionalism. Dave spinning out of control

mentally over the word vanilla. Natasha, Carrie and a rad six pair shoes for no reasons. You know what? You're both masters of their craft. You know, I have to say having such a bad track record with the couples is sad. But you know, having those two couples turnout, well, I just have to say this. I am honored to have known Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck before they were famous and worked on my boat. That's all guys. So Natasha goes out and starts texting her ex-boyfriend.

Oh my god. Immediately. See this is bullshit here. It's just because it's like move on. Move on. Move on. Move on. Move away. Oh my god So she said

This is a text I know it's been a while. What did it say? Well, it's not been a while. It's been a while. Please don't tell anyone. I'm texting what is this anyone? Oh god, what is it? Hey stop. I know stop. It's been a while. Stop. Okay, we'll talk. Stop. Hey, Han, you don't need to act like it's a telegraph. It's a text message. It's okay. I sent this message on this host today so that you can know... It's like, babe. Just send a text, all right? It's been four moon cycles and stuff heard from you last night.

Do you hope this message finds you well? Babe, it literally just arrived right now. So inside wacky crew staff, Kyle is attacking Natalia in the laundry room. And she's like, Kyle, all this hot on. Jason goes, did she just say, Kyla's Hawaiian? Wow, that's not something you hear a lot

when you're working on Wall Street doing commodities. Am I right? High five. So no one, no one high five, you'd let me hang here. All right. All right. So Natalia gets into her bed and she's with Storm and she's like,

I'm coming to bed. Can I get a footy? A footy? And he's like, how are you ticklish? How can you have foot massages? If you're ticklish, this is crazy. I'm the lead of a yacht now. Hope I can do it.

If I can just make those feet tickle, maybe I can run this boat like the true pro. No, I am deep down. He's like constantly about to break into a song from Newsies. He's like, you know what tomorrow? Or he's like, I have a big day tomorrow. I got to Britain. I'm going on a get on the boat and I'm going to drive the boat.

I was just giving you the build up because he does always seem like he's about to build that. He's like, I've been given a chance, a chance that no one else has been given and today is the day I rise up. But it never, the song never happens. Because I rise up, boys, hey, hey, hey, before we get into song, can you give me that for massage? She gives me her foot. I'm a solid lightly, then I put my hand up and go through her toes and feel the tingles for the bottom of my toes, to my brain and my hair's on fire. And how you talking to that, you...

Can you just close the down a little bit? So then Kyle, then Natasha, so now Kyle has moved in with Natasha now. And so she's in the room, and he's, babe, hey, do you want to hear the waterfall? Babe, she goes, what's the waterfalls? Is it the most romantic place you've ever seen in your life? And then he just starts being very loudly. It's not like we with foals on. So then Jason and Chef are in their cabin together. And so Jason's like, oh, so I put your stuff down there.

All right, bottom bunk. He's like, did I take your cover? Did you say something? Oh my God, I'm never letting him out of my sight. I'm afraid I've already become a nuisance to you. I apologize So he is and Jason's like listen now that we're roomies just mind your business Stay clean don't use act deodorizers. Don't say deodorant also just call them deodorizers Okay, and yeah, I guess it turns out I have a little bit of an OCD which stands for obsessive commodities disorder. Yeah

Well a trader who's against acts weird. I know I know I didn't make it I'm illustrious. Yeah, I'm kidding. So the next day Natalia Natalia Natasha Natalia Nali and Natasha this isn't in sandy talking but I wanted to try and do it My voice turns out it's a tongue twister. Okay, not my preference. Not about me. Someone else want to do this line great Much more fragile voice is calling you this morning What do you want to do for decor? Today I'd like to do all the things I dreamt of doing with day if they don't never have the chance to do flowers, champagne,

wedding veil, a little baby crib on the side, maybe a heart chair, something. I'd like to make the table look like the garden. We'd take walks in around the perimeter of every spring there. In the hotel, you're like, I've got it. Not a cold. It's like, all right, let's do not a cold. Can they wear the hats? Can they wear the hats?

People love hats. They love when I get wacky hats. How are they going to do a nautical theme on a boat? So now it's 8 a.m. and the day. I know you're really spoiling those guests. I know. The next time you do a theme, they're gonna be like, where's the set for this one? I mean.

So for TAR, the theme is table and chairs. So Storm's walking around being like mad at the boat. He's like, want to bang out that las. Bang it out. It's rock, provisionals here, a provisional. We're gonna get the ribs ready. We're gonna leave this dock. We're gonna go out on the high season and see what we got because it's time to leave. It's time to leave the dock. And if I say one thing I'm gonna say Hey storm could you just get that line out of the water So Natalia and Kyle and tell you say this girl who's joining this new girl She trash and he's like I'm gonna tell a storm single in looking I

Tires like I'm like whoa you barely just got a foot massage Crazy eyes. I mean this girl definitely has crazy eyes. You've got to watch out for this one So I know you said that but I just wanted to say one. So I'm not bitch. I know you said that but I just wanted to say it. I'm gonna be that bitch babe. Roll up the partition babe. My love is like exo exo babe. I love when people make predictions like this. Well, she could be the coolest person ever, or she could be the worst person ever. It's gonna go one way of a vibe. Yes, because that's you covered everyone. Yeah, so we see a blonde walking up the dock, and everyone's like, no, not Malia, no, not Malia. And we see a walking closer, and we hear hello Hi, oh hi, it's so good to see you

This is it you see me on TV before it's me cool me Right I'm Captain Sam T nice to me. We've met before Have we? Oh, right all right. We'll go flap your butt cheeks up against that window. It needs to be desalted, all right? It's time for commercial. It's time for a crappin' school. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards

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Yes Courtney is back and I was like oh my god, it's Courtney and then I was like wait, it's Courtney And so she's like well, I used to go on bits and I used to be known as the wild one the crazy one and last season It was just so intense and I was constantly inside and trusted But so I worked as a deque after last season she's always like cracking herself up so again I was so daylight so when I left lady Michelle I went to the Bahamas and I did the last part of the season it's a deque and I'm so excited to come back with super nervous

I'm getting some ready to twerk Super nervous. I'm given some ready to twerk. Susie and Courtney hug and Sandy's like, Oh, God, I love these was like, yes, Courtney, that's how you, that's how you come back on the boat. Not like Reagan over there who's like, yeah, I've got five you can get for me. I'd love to leave the boat, someone gets my bag for them. Suddenly there's just like the lights drop and there's a spot on the storm. He's like, they don't want me to get the bags.

They don't want me to get them anything at all. Mm-hmm. Okay, storm, I'm gonna need you out on the air deck. Can get that spotlight off. I mean, he's got to do some work So he's like she brings some good twerk to the team. Oh She's come to visit me since we finished and I've grown even fond of her and the producers like said you have lingering feelings for her And he's like No he's just like said you have lingering feelings for her and he's like no see i okay

it's like wait Natasha what are you doing? i just sought potential for another Victorian romance but we're in the doodham unrequited love and such i'll go back to my real i used to try track with the girl named Victoria, skinny little butt, but she could really shake it. Never mind, never mind. So then Tarsha comes in today and says, Oh, oh, uh, uh, yeah, yeah, sure. Sure. They're recurring motif on this season's these two knuckleheads, getting themselves coffee and tea.

Like, my day is out of that with me tripping over a cup of coffee. They would lift it my door. That's what I've been through. Remember that episode? She was done with me completely done with me, but then she brought me coffee. Is something brewing? This coffee is delicious. What did you say, Adev? Nothing. Oh, look off, lethargy. So Natalia is giving Courtney a tour and she's like, said, basically, it's a lot, okay? There's Natasha and then Cholia a Chol-ya, alright? So, Acha and Nax and she goes, alright, so you're... Naaah! On Naaah!

Alright, that's Acha, on Naaah! God, don't listen to you. God, she's hot and steeping. I'm gonna kill her in a sleep for everyone's in love with that. Howdy, friendly guy over here and you know who I am? I'm that bitch. Okay, boy, what is that? Alright, everybody gather, gather one and all. It's time for deck crew, deck crew, deck crew meeting, deck crew. Alright, we're here for a deck crew meeting, alright? I don't know why the orchestra crapped out again, but they did. So welcome to the crew, twerker. For this charter, I did print a new big schedule. All right. In the evening, we do try to help out interior. You know what that's like already, don't you twerky? So if you see things lying around, pick it up.

All right, just pick it up. That's what I've got to say. If you see things on the ground, pick them up. Thank you. I'm going to be giving classes soon. I love this big, high-level, original speeches. But, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but Well, I'm a very intense person as evidenced by me telling people that if you see something pick it up, I have an large heart. Literally! I was in Sri Lanka in 2013 and I was surfing and I felt this crazy drop in my heart and couldn't breathe properly and I was suffering from a condition called atrial fibrillation. Anyway, they had to stop and start my heart and I was dead for two minutes. No one's around. I've

I've seen deaths. I've loaded in the eyes. I've been on the tape. No one's here. Okay, alright. People ask me what I saw when I died and I can say this. I saw a tunnel. There was a light at the end, but there were napkins on the floor, so I picked them up and by the time I picked them up, the tunnel had closed and I was back in the goddamn bed. So now everything I'm going to do, I'm going to overdo it. So hey, do you see that on the ground? Pick it out. It's a floor board. Pick it up anyway. See? He literally says, everything I'm going do I'm gonna over do and the next line of some saying grab a microfiber clean the tray Whoa, I could have said paper towel, but I'm over doing it microfiber it is

Everything happens for a reason get the microfiber This deck is wet. It's very wet. Today, we use microfibers. It wasn't until I was almost dead that I realized I didn't want clean windows. I wanted really clean windows. So, now that they're cleaning with the microfibers, et cetera. And Courtney is nervous because it's like her, it's like she's proving herself, I guess. And now it's provisions, provisions. And I have to say, first of all, poor Courtney is already windexing a

table. Okay, she's like, I did not come back for this shit. So she's like, well, you know what I really need to do is I really need to learn to do anchor. I'd love to learn how to do anchor and Zika's. It's all Gucci. Oh, don't start that shit. Okay. That's over there. That chapter is close back. More like it's all microfiber. Okay. Get to wiping.

So then, uh, yes, the Nataasha is the Natasha is, she's like walking around. And she's like, interior, interior, interior, interior is looking fab. See what I do there? I use interior as a prop and arm, and then I turned it into a regular now. And Teria is looking fab. And then Natalia goes, well, I wish I could say the same thing for coil, not your coil. So then Natalia is doing a table and Courtney's house. She's like, you want help me do the table, new slut. And she's like, sure, I'll help you.

So she's helping her. I think Courtney just keeps putting stuff on the table. I'm going, yes. Yes. Yes. He keeps putting stuff on the table and going, yes. Yes. Uh oh. I'm looking at the weather and these swells are not good.

I mean, why do they even call them swells? You're at the exact opposite, if you know what I'm saying. They should call them, no. You know, thanks for joining me for Captain Sandy's serenity computer screen time. Okay, we've got a charter board today. Now, for the layperson, they don't know the minutes I turned that corner. The swells are massive. Okay, only pros get that.

So it's not fun for anyone. So I can't leave the dock, which sucks. Now, here's what I can do. I can say, that's swell. What I mean, that sucks. Nobody's, the layperson's not going to get that. I'll tell you that right now. Yeah.

You know, they wanted to call them the socks, but it scared too many people and they used whirlpools. So we just call them swells, and said it was a branding effort that I think ultimately failed. I rate everybody changing to your white. So everybody's changing. And Kyle and Natasha and their in their cabin and Kyle's like, bye, my tighti-th-bive! It's Courtney, she's going to try to twerk a little bit. She still thinks that means shaking her knee, poor thing. So anyway, good share her. Well, you know, as most people call it, their cat is rubbing their butt up against the wild, trying to scratch it, okay? You know, one man's twerk is another man's treasure idling late night answer.

What can I tell you? Okay, but that's, that's Courtney. If, if you need anything picked up, drop it on the floor. She'll pick it up with her butt cheeks. Okay. So the guest start, the guest approach and Sandy is like, okay, everyone watch this.

See if you can figure out what I'm doing here. Welcome to your home away from home Because it's called home Welcome to your mortar yard home away from land mass home Land home so they go on they go on a boat the women come on and they go on a boat tour and everything and sand and they do the whole tour And then Sandy has to address them and she goes hey, so you guys ever heard of the socks? I mean the swells So if the weather and the seas and the swells dissipate I'm off the dock like like that. You see that? It's like be witched. I go this. And guess what? We're in the

middle of the ocean. Now we're back. Now in the ocean. Now we're back. Well, that was fast, right? Hey, you see this rocking? Well, it's 10 fold out there. Okay. In here, it's a little Johnny cashed. Turned it on, ring of fire. Out there is full on Elf is bumped, grained, and filed on the ground. Rock. Okay. So the plan for now is to stay on the dock is what I'm telling you. I want to, ladies, because are you kidding? I, I, you are kidding me. Oh, I'm sorry.

You have to stay in luxury accommodations while you tour a beautiful city that's not run over by tourists. I'm so sorry, lady. I mean, I get it, you know, you're paid to be on a, but if you're not actually, you know, on the sea, you're just kind of in a motor home, you know? And it's like, if I'm just gonna be here,

put me up in a fucking hotel, okay? I don't wanna say on the motor. If you're out on the sea, it's like, ooh, luxury, you know, none of the fish get to be on this. But you can't fight with Johnny Damon and his wife if you're out sea. That's how you gotta be at a dock. That his wife if you're out and see. That's true. You've got to be at a dock.

This is true, sir. That is true. So, um, Sanjit's like, yeah, well, you know, I know you're upset by this choice, but, you know, when you go out there, you'd be really seasick, okay? So I want to challenge my crew to entertaining you. How do you feel about an adventure off the boat? Okay, we're gonna put one of you guys in a straight jacket and push you off the edge

and you gotta get up before you drown. Has that sound everyone, huh? Now this is my challenging them. I'm gonna challenge them. They have to entertain, now listen. It's been quite a challenge for them to entertain America, but they're gonna entertain you. One of them found a stuff taco last week.

So who knows where this is gonna lead? This actually reminds me, I mentioned just gonna read part of it. Because it cracked me up. Like this is so Captain Sandy is running this hotel. Okay, it goes, greetings Benjamin Mandelker. In celebration of our inner reality, I'm gonna read this hotel. I'm gonna read this hotel. I'm gonna read this hotel.

I'm gonna read this hotel. I'm gonna read this hotel. I'm gonna read this hotel. I'm gonna read this hotel. I'm gonna read this hotel. I'm gonna read this hotel. I'm gonna read this hotel. I'm gonna read this hotel. I'm gonna read this hotel. I'm gonna read this hotel. I'm gonna read this is so Captain Sandy is running this hotel,

okay, it goes greetings Benjamin Mandelker. In celebration of our innovative culture, we will be undergoing a scheduled maintenance project that overlaps with the dates of your stay, during the schedule maintenance all water outlets will be temporarily shut off. I'm like, wait, this is in celebration of our innovative culture.

And let me say in celebration of our innovative culture. And let me say it's in celebration of our innovative culture. We're turning off the water faucets for renovation. This is a celebration. You guys, I'm like, it's time that we stop everything. We stop showering and we just celebrate the a loft hotel of Orlando with this innovative decision. Why is a loft always a disaster? Because that one time we sat in an a loft and it was like construction. You know, we had no idea there was it was in an area that had construction, but it was like this huge

building across the street. So all night like I was like, ba-broom-broom-broom-broom-broom-broom-broom. And then, Traff, it was crazy. And I was like, you guys, it's just, because they're built like these big cement lofts, where everything's just reverberating up the walls. And I was like, guys, this noise is crazy. You need to warn people and they're like, oh no, we didn't tell you.

Our gift to you is the most amazing sound app. You download it on your phone and it just you'll never sleep without it again. I was like, that's your gift to me. A free fucking app from the app store that you guys didn't even make to drown out the sound. Oh my. Ronnie, it sounds like you forgot to celebrate their innovative culture. I'm sorry. We celebrate the innovative culture. I'm sorry. We celebrate innovation.

Crazy. Okay. Well, guess what? In celebration of our innovative culture, we're not moving this. Yeah. Okay. But we do have buckets for you to puke in. That's part of our innovation. So, but I was kind of that gastrite that I just complained about. I'm like, are you kidding me? Like they can help it, you know. Okay, so Courtney is asking the plan for the day and Storm's like, well, you know, it's a bit different today because we can't go out.

So hands-on interior all day long. And she's like, great. Glad I switched to deck. And then it cuts to Natasha texting and texting and texting. And I didn't mean that word. Why can't put that word in there? So Dave is removing film from a picture in Tasha's. Oh yeah, because Natasha is making a picture of cocktails. And like she's just like done something with the blender so it's like foamy on the top and Dave's like hold on I can remove the film. What you said Dave did you say something Dave?

No I said nothing. What you feel with that spoon Dave? He's like getting the muck off the tube shoot out. Oh Dave, thanks Dave. Thanks a lot, you really helped, Dave. And he's like, I get tired. Do that make your tired, Dave. You can't keep going like this spoon enough.

Scum from the top of juice, Dave. You can wear yourself thin. So Dave has just spuned my awful juice, which leads him to this monologue. My whole life has been fighting. LAUGHTER Cars on fire, bullies on the street. But when I went to the Alps, I met nicer people and I got a lot of qualities from them.

So I'm going to keep that gratitude and the support that I got there and I'm going to give gratitude and support everyone on board. Thank you. It's like, well, thanks for getting the juice, the fucking pulp off the juice. I mean, Jesus. I know. There, while you're trying to ski on the kitchen counters. Yes, I took that quality from the nice people of the helps. Hang 10, bro. What you say?

So then Courtney starts helping Natasha and she's like, yes, see if you can help down in the master cabin, you know, clean the cabins. And Courtney is just hating this, you know. So then Jason is offering to help Dave and Dave's like, sure, I've already done the fruit poop not that anyone seemed to notice. Yes, I could choose your help and for that I give you gratitude my brother. Here are some ski goggles from the kind people of the Alps. I'm just like, oh my god, the thing's going on in his head.

He has to be like a chef and then you throw in the issues of like Natasha. I can't even fathom how difficult that is. I would jump off the boat. I would jump off the boat. Wow. I mean, peace and quiet for him must be a rare commodity. So, uh, so Courtney and Natalia, it's so stupid. This was come to me, maybe, tons of commodity or just wedging the word commodity.

Mm-hmm. So, uh, Courtney and Natalia are unpacking guest-luckish together. And yeah, Courtney is, she's bummed. She's bummed to be there. And then Mule upstairs, Kyle is taking drink orders and now Natasha is making cocktails, but Kyle's teeth are starting to really ache a lot. So he's like, I'm gonna go down, bye, because my teeth are like a babe. So Courtney is like, all right, so why don't you give me some gossip? You know, tell me the hot goss and Natalia is like, well, David talks have major vibes. That's a negative one and with the positive couple, the positive relationship means storm. So it's bang.

And she goes, we did a footy, we did a footy, you better back off my mouth bitch. I love that Natalia has elevator her in-storm to like positive relationship on board. Like you guys have had a foot massage and you kiss the club. I just love also how she's like so happy to advertise themselves as the possible. So there's like the sh- you know the shitty couple on board, but then there's like the super awesome one like I would say America's hearts but neither of us are Americans so I guess we're like global sweet hearts I guess I know would you really well on the beat anyway we're like the most popular ever so you're welcome. So Kyle is talking to the guest like he normally

does. How do you like him? A teen aides bab babes, dirty, feels the don'tcha. How do you feel about sir being sir by semi-news, semi-worked out mostly men? Hmm, yeah. I'm gay as hell, babe. Wish I'd come on out of the closet onto one of those. I'll clear that right now. You want nibbling your drinker, don't ya? Question girls, who here wants a block chat chances out of a red glaze on a vanilla

cake raise your hands. Yeah we love man yeah we're girls right a girls trap. So then the captain now let's join captain Sammy looking at her computer screen, she's like, oh my God, there's waves. That's big. That's huge. It's a huge one. These swells are big. These are big swells. Big.

Wow. God. It sounds almost like I'm doing a commercial for a big backstory. Like, whoa, check out these big swells, but it swells. Oh, that would have been good for Captain Glenn. I got to tell him. Black Friday, big swells. So, what for? Why Friday, big swells. So, wha- wha- wha- why day, big swells?

It's time for commercial. It's time for a crap and commercial. So, um, the chef is like, well, the preference sheet asked for Maltese food, but I've never made traditional Maltese food, so instead I took classic French and mixed with random maltees food. Oh, my life I've been fighting. Fighting, fighting, reading a recipe online and having to cook it.

So I've decided to make French food and just add olives. So everybody's wearing their captain hats, hats for a lunchtime. Yeah. And Natasha's like, all right. Now what we're gonna know you this for you to shepherd on them. Shepherd on them around the town, all right Storm? All right Storm. And Natalia's like, you bet, watch a goddamn ant Storm. If you want to keep more than you got their moms, tell you that.

Let me tell you something Storm. If you dare even go to Pop-O-Lite Village and come back with all of them, you won't be here for me anymore. I'll say that much. So that's like a golf cart tour. They're gonna do a golf cart tour. And then Dave is working on like a fish dish

called Maggie, the spelled meager. And that's exciting. And so then meanwhile, like someone's talking, I think it's like Natalia's talking to Natasha or Kyle or something. But Natasha is texting furiously. She's like, On second, this is quite urgent. I've got a message from my suitor.

We have to walk around the garden together. She's disturbed. Like what the hell? Okay, like, yeah, I can't be disturbed. like this girl's like oh my god I feel like tied down in my relationships. I'm gonna go have this like crazy fun relationship with this hottest fuck chef, you know, but then he turned out to be crazy. Okay, like I'm with you so far Okay, but the fact that you cannot go five seconds without immediately

cannot go five seconds without immediately embroiling yourself in another insane drama. That is of your making. Like, come on. That is, that is. And I think that there's like a part of her that, like, this is me putting on my pop psychology hat. But like, a part of her that's like, feels bad about what happened with Dave.

And so then she's, she sort of just feels like a shitty person. And I think that like, she's going back to the X for to be like basically to be like, you know, you're a good person, right? Like I kind of feel like she's going back not because she wants the X, but because she feels shitty about herself.

So she wants to do something that makes her feel like better. I don't know, this might be a problematic day. So seeking approval. She's just kind of seeking approval or whatever. I mean, I'm looking at it as her realising like, oh my God, I dumped a good guy for a crazy person. Now I have to get the good guy back immediately. You know, but yeah, it's like, that relationship is going bad also, right? Like, then she said that relationship was pretty much over by the time they cheated, but now she's like,

I realized what I missed. She said that he cheated, right? She said that he cheated and she said, it doesn't make it right to cheat back on somebody just because they cheated. I'm like, yeah, it does. Because I remember being like, yes, it does. If they cheated, then yes, you immediately go fucking cheat.

That's your pass. So I've never really understood that logic, but now she's gonna like bend over backwards apologizing to him, which makes me wonder if he cheated in the first place because she's, I don't know, whatever it is, she does not need to be in two seconds. Doing it like going this furious. Yeah. The urgency with which she's doing it is what's actually the strangest part. Ultimately, that's the strangest part. It's like, girl, you're working around charter.

You don't need to have this talk with your ex right now. Maybe you realize, oh shit, I messed up a good thing, so you want to get back. But it doesn't have to happen right now, which is why I feel like it's coming. It might be motivated by a fresh feelings of guilt that are really hard to deal with in terms of like the day in situation. Doesn't matter. Yeah, either way it's crazy. Stop it. So, the everybody really likes lunch and cows like, look what may, serving large, serving trees, cleaning large, cleaning trees, my butt cracks sweating. Where's the chiefs to actually? What the hell is going on? I'm doing service alone, it's pissing me off bad.

Literally, I'm up and down the entire time. I've literally been asking for help this entire time. On. Emmeywall Natasha's just texting her ex. I want to speak to the unperson. I cannot talk to your properly over text. I've sent Mr. Jordan here to go fetch her. Oh my gosh, because I just start now back to dare.

And he texts back, can't wait to see her babe. Which so now you're gonna bring him on the show? Are you fucking nuts, lady? Geez. Okay, so then Kyle is still having teeth problems. And he's like, I'm a god. That was helping me with my teeth. Fuck this is literally getting out of control.

Bye. Yeah. Yeah this is literally getting out of control. Bye. Yeah. He's getting mad because he's doing all this work and it's he's hurt. So then Storm now tells the women that they could be going on a city tour at six o'clock and Sandy is like, hey, is there a plan?

And Storm's like, well, we're organizing these golf cats to take them into town. And Sydney goes, awesome, so sad. That is such a sad thing to say. Awesome, so sad. God, I love that banana. So Kyle's disoriented. He's like, I'm so bad.

I'm going to fuck up surveys. Can I be a hasky pient tonight? And then Tali's like, sure, I'll do so. You know, she'd love to go do service for a night. So she just wants to go out from that table and do armualty. But she'll end up in the most positive couple on the boat. All right, let's pretend it's gambling night because that's when I really knocked it out the park, or I? So Natali was like, yeah, I'll do that no problem.

You're looking a bit what? So Kyle's like, I'm very sorry, but the job must get on. I'm not going to fuck up on service. Can I be in house? Oh, yeah, you already said that I say this. I'll just stop talking because I'm that bitch. So then we get the golf cart tour and Z has a golf monologue where he's like wow this takes me back to the golf course I've been playing golf since I was 70 years old golf requires huge amounts of practice yawting is like muscle memory So let's hope this season I can handle a tenor like a golf car

It's like a good else you know's more pain, you know what I mean? I feel like everyone else has more painful monologues and Z's like left golfing. I know. It reminds me of the time when I was on a golf course and I swung and I did feel about it. I came one under pause, pretty good time. It's like, hmm Z you need more torture with your with your golfing stories So um now Sandy is really happy because storm has made a schedule and he's printed it out It was not written on a cocktail nap and he's like wow storm did his schedule. He's got his anchor watches It's very good actually there. I say it dear. I see it Awesome toss. Awesome toss.

All right, storm storm to the bridge. Awesome toss, awesome toss, Sandy. Awesome toss, awesome toss, Sandy to the bridge. Okay, now listen, tomorrow morning, the weather gets better. So, well, actually through the night, well, you know, what are we gonna do in the middle of the night?

Say, hey ladies, that's why weather's great. So, we'll let them sleep, but then, at 7 a.m. we're throwing in our lines. I just want to make sure you understand what lines are, right? It's like, sure do. God, you're amazing. You're an amazing risotto. Amazing risotto.

God, I just a reminder, tomorrow the weather is going to be like a little gay child's life. It gets better. It gets better. It gets better tomorrow. So, amazing jam. God, you're amazing jam. Yeah, amazing. Wonderful reduction.

Wonderful reduction. So, now this group, they're on their golf cart tour, all around like Valetta or wherever, or like a fort. It looks so fun. I think this is like, I think this is 10 times more fun than going on the stupid sea map. Sea map. I think it's going to be on tour of the whole town that she and his kid was supposed

to be named after. That's pretty amazing. So to go, there's like a garden, it's all nice. And we see Valetta, the smallest cap balloon, all of Europe. Valetta's like, thanks for building an addition. We're trying to zone pop by land into our city for crying out loud, give us a more square footage. So then Tasha runs down the deck so that she can make a call where I guess she think she's not being heard. Of course she's being recorded, right? So she's crying and carrying on. She's like, I saw her to call your cry. I never

was no excuse that I cheated on you with the sheer fun, I'm just a liar, the cheat. And I can't live with this. I love you to places. I'm struggling. I don't deserve you. I just don't. I'm undeserving butter. I'm undeserving butter. This is Natasha's equivalent of running through the rain

across the hillside to admit her love for someone. This is like, what's her face? Like on the hill's incense and sensibility, like running in the rain and then getting a fever. And then it's like, is she gonna be okay? Has the fever broken yet? We're not sure. We're just gonna be strong.

Kate, Kate, what's her face? Is it Kate? When's that? It's in the back. It's in the back. It's Kate, what's her face? Is it Kate? When's that? It's a cat. It's a cat. It's Kate, when's that? It's not. She's not allowed to win a beer.

She's not allowed to win a beer. She's not. Won a beer. Won a beer. So everybody is driving back and one of the, they're on the golf carts and one of the ladies is like, What do you do with that thing? Do you touch it? Oh my god, it's a horn.

And it was a Ben horn. That was Ben's pass. If anyone is wondering what Ben sounds like angry and tragic, that's it. Oh my god, the fucking cut me off. I'm like, I'm angry, but I'm not courageous enough to make a scene. I'm like I'm angry, but I'm not courageous enough to make a scene And now that I've got Subaru it's like So the Subaru one is a real high pitch. It's like you must you must be blowing a kazoo or something so So back to Natasha and Dave I believe I think that's where we are where she's still talking to him and she's like She's like, she's like, I don't deserve, yeah, I don't, you know, and then she tells us, my ex is telling me to don't

beat yourself up. I forgive you. We can make this work. Cut it makes me feel like, why am I not fighting for this? Why am I not sending in a brat neon green shot called the Sad West, what am I doing? Sideways, broader, valid. So Natalia is getting an pink sparkle dress and the captain's like, oh my God, that dress is beautiful. And Storm's like, you look pretty sexy in that dress. I'm provisional, wife, yeah.

And she's like, I'm doing a casino, not tonight. I'm a bit from my community manager and senior vision come together. I mean, I'd love to see the guest reaction. I put holes in cards and then I put strings through the holes and then I hung them up. And when I see one of this lady say, oh my god, is that a string in a card? I'm dying.

Then I'll be dead on the floor. All right. LAUGHTER That's a lullaby Broadway. Sora had to sing that one on the floor. Alright. That's a lullaby Broadway. Sora had to sing that when I put on the sequence. So now, so now Natasha is in a room with Kyle. Like, it's Kyle by the way, in the middle of this, they got to Kyle, poor Kyle.

One of my least favorite things to watch on TV or movies is like, too strong. I hate it in real life. I hate when I have it. It's horrible. But it's always about like, I remember seeing Castaway and like in the opening scene when Tom Hanks is at like a lovely little dinner. And in the dinner, he's like, oh, oh, sorry.

Just a little two thing. I was like, that fucking tooth is gonna be the worst thing that happens in this movie. I know it. And of course, there's like this terrible tooth extraction scene in that movie. So seeing Kyle, like he's like sticking a towel into his mouth, he's the terrible tooth extraction scene in that movie. So seeing Kyle, he's sticking a towel into his mouth. He's like, so I was like, oh no.

So now he's really in pain. I felt so bad for him. He's just like moaning. And he's like, oh, Natasha is still so distracted with her actions. He's like, I know you're in pain and you need a friend to be there for you, the way you are there for me. What have I got to know you from my ex? I got to examine it.

It's an eggplant but then a pumpkin which I really don't understand. What does that mean? And he's like, oh my God, are you looking to rectify things with him, babe? And she says, well, he wants to sort things out. And he's that of the straight version of you. Never met anyone that you can make me laugh like that. And he's like, oh my God is it the chief pain or the pain of the singer with someone like me who is not me that's making me hurt right now. It's just say something Kyle. Now babe out by a dead. Oh hi, car. You know, there's something about Almond's tooth that go into the situation. Dave, who, man, who's awful, man, we realize I still love Max. We're

both very similar people. We both love the party. Our house just constant, constant parties. I mean, look at me. One big party. I know. This was so funny about it. She doesn't really seem like that. I guess we've seen glimpses of that when they go out and drink and she's like, yeah, just want to have fun, not be suffocated. But it's hard to envision that as her normal self, you know, but I also love that her definition of real love. She's like, Yacht's missing with both that to party. Yeah, I know. We had great. We had great house part. Yeah, that's real love right there. Um,

people would come in all night long and we'd sit on exofer and play cards quietly. The party would never end. I've never had a better bolder dash part now. So, Kyle is like, well, I don't think running back to him is your best option, babe. And she's like, but I'll do you run away from problems a lot. You know, well, I won't bore you with this. She's like, oh, right, good night. you with this, she's like, oh, well, I've got a good night. The two cameras over his head, like Jesus shut up, lady. So the guests are back. And they get some, they get some welcome drinks, which is like what that fruit concoction or that whatever it was that she's making that picture. But we don't actually find out what the concoction was. I was like, so ready to cringe for a show. I was just like, all right, here we have some straw berries

served with, with, with, I figured it was like watermelons something. Strawberries with a bit of pop rocks turned over upside down into a Snickers bar, blended with cream cheese. Enjoy, ladies. That's a mess. Oh, so there's a four layer shiny cake being made. Dave loves the shiny cake.

He loves the shiny, wobbly cake. Shiny red cake. Now the first time I did it, I was like, that's pretty cool. He did a mirror glaze or whatever. But now I'm like, man, need more than a shiny red glaze on a white sponge, okay? Yes, because we have watched the great British bake off.

Yeah. So then Natasha's like, all right, who am I gonna steer to be the third to do with this tonight? And quartz, like, oh, you can still me. And she's like, well, we're a man down. And then she's like, well, I don't want to do housekeeping. She's like, but you do housekeeping because you know, whatever the news already. And she's like, the thing is, I need two people in service.

All right. And that's just here, on the both here, I run this, this department. And the title is like, well, I don't want to go into the house keeping. And she's like tough tits. I love it. But it's just funny because she says, which is trying to delegate and she's like, I don't want to go into house keeping. And she's like, okay, you're going to go into house keeping.

It's like, so yeah, and yeah, Natalia's really mad. Because basically she wants to see everyone come up and be like, oh my god, you hungry streamers, you know? Yeah, to see her creation. And so she goes bitching the Kyle and she's like, I can't fucking deal right now, right babe. He's like, what the? His tooth is like his face is all blown up and

she's like I just said this big strapper cancer alright and I'm is a cleaning caddy alright now I've got to clean the fucking room and he's like well you should be on service because you're allowed outspoken bitch that's what we need. I just think it's funny this guy is like a massive page he's like I am so what a terrible but not. Could there ever be a knot? I said, but it's not. I put up streamers and now I can't even get to see them.

Look at the streamers. Could anyone have it with the me right now? Carl, he's like, oh, oh, oh, oh. Well, that's kind of the worst part of being sick or having something wrong with you, right? Cause it's supposed to be about you and people call you under the guys of it being about you but it's never about you.

It's like, and you have to answer because they're being nice, right? So it's like, oh hi, how you feeling today? I'm not really very good, but I appreciate you checking on me. Well, your father, let me just tell you. I mean, that fucking idiot. I know it's not nice to call him a fucking idiot, but I mean, do you know which button the garage door is?

We've had the same fucking garage door for eight years Eddie, okay, it's the middle one. That's the one it is, but he hits the other one and then he comes home and says why is the garage door open? I mean really, really, really? Oh my god, all of this because I'm sick. I have to listen otherwise I would have just said no to your call and waited for a text, you know? I would have just said no to your call and waited for a text, you know. Well, meanwhile upstairs in the galley, Dave is telling us a little bit about how he works. He goes, with everything happening with Tosh, it's been so difficult. That's why I'm glad I have the galley. It clears my mind completely. I've got nothing to think about, but getting the job done.

And also, how I can fit an open horn into this very small room. Vehicle. Something else I learned for the very nice people of the ups. So, Courtney is putting on a little sequin dress now and Storm's like, oh yeah, good looking, good looking girl. And it's like, God, I hate paint. It's my worst nightmare. It's a girly girl. And she tells us, you know, like, I'm a dickhand. I don't want to be in a pink sparkly dress my first night. Okay. Well, you know, there you go. There you go. So the guests, they guest the town dinner and they're like, wow, this day, core, wow, wow.

And then Natalia is downstairs cleaning up the floor. So if he sees a representation of my day, then I don't know what else is. Kyle's like in the other room. If Monti's meant hurting,. I just puke on her head So they get some lobster tail suit with Nioh key for dinner and it's sous vide lobster tail Which I've still I cannot get behind sous vide. I don't care what anybody says. It tastes like Jello That's it. Why did and why does lobster tail need to be sous vide? I don't know But it seems like lobster in less. It's. Unless you put a stick of butter in that bag

before you put it in the water, I have no desire to try that. Gross. So now the guys are getting into their stripper outfits. And before that happens, Dave presents this three-tier cake shirtless, which I don't know, I just feel like with, I just don't want,

like, if you're gonna be short-listened serving me a shiny cake, you need to be like old school chippendales, like shiny smooth chest. Oh, no, no, I don't want hairy, I don't want hair, I don't want chest hair near my cake, I'm sorry. Now listen, David is psycho, and I don't want him near my cake because of that, but God damn, the man is, I mean, no and I don't want him near my cake because of that but god damn the man is I mean I mean from straight on he's very hot and his body is here. Oh, yeah, he's so cute

Let's hear him as with a guy co-lizard. I'm sorry, but hot Not nice. I should make fun of the way people look. They can't help it, especially if they were raised around car fires. He's hot. So, now, that doesn't mean I want to be served by any shirtless man, but you know, a hot shirtless man. Yeah, I'll take it.

I'll take it. I'm not saying that, like, chest hair is not hot. I'm just saying, if you're serving shiny cake, if chest hairs come off, they're not gonna bounce off, they're gonna stick in. They're gonna like from the- You know what I'm saying, it's from the collagen, okay?

Just don't eat sticky cake because there's shit flying all over the place. Have you seen a sick video where they show you like how COVID spreads or whatever? It's like animated, where at any time somebody talks all the little spit little things come out of their mouths, I mean, you're fucked, okay. It's going to stick on the cake at least to make it hot. I will take your

hair over COVID bubbles. I'll take it. Yes. But the hair I can see. I can see the hair. I'm not. And it's less dangerous than the COVID bubbles. You see, you're making my point. That's probably true. It's probably true. So either way, then a ZN storm come out in their stripper uniforms. So storm is dressed like a fireman, but ZI I can't tell really. He's sort of like dressed like a lad and kind of, I didn't know what Z was dressed like. Well, hey, they didn't put him in the stuff taco. So I call it a win. Yeah.

So then the cake is served. Dave goes to bed. And then the ladies are wasted now. So one of them was like, are we going to Jebusin? What's happening? We know what got to Jebusin. I love that. I want to say that.

I want to go out and get drunk tonight just so I can say, who wants to go to Jebusin? OK, let's go jibbuzin. So they get him a hot tub and he's like, oh yeah, this is actually really good for your muscles. Okay, this is good for your muscle sitting in a positive, of everybody else's germs. Who's good for him? And then it's like late at night, the guests are going to sleep and Natasha's cleaning and cleaning and cleaning and then she texts her.

Now no longer says ex-boyfriend, now it says boyfriend. That was that quickly. The title already changed. I love you. I love you now. Numbering. That's a question for you later. I just remembered.

I'm trying to do this thing where if I think of things I write them down, write in the moment so that I can remember it later. When it's important, but I still interrupted a recap for it anyway. Isn't that fun? Lessons are still learned in this house. I like hearing your methodology, okay?

I like it. Thanks. So, second day of charter, morning, captain, storm storm captain, storm storm captain, storm, you're ready. Okay. Looks like the weather is working with us. This is called helpful wind. Okay. This is called teamwork wind. All right. So listen, here's what we need location distances, location distances, location distances. Okay. You want to say that fast three times or Natasha Natasha Natalia fast three times

Just one of them. I need you to have some vocal practice Locations, distances locations distances tom to get the boat off the dock because we're gonna do locations Distances locations distances locations locations Locations and distances no, it's not gonna start. Okay, cool. Here storm. Okay, and then we give it don't don't So he's like all right Your own bow you bring the spring in get it up as a sap chasing when the boat is clear dolphin say clear swing Coordinates like oh my god. I'm glad to live a similar similar to my last boat Blah blah blah.

Okay, so now it's time to take off. Storm distances. Five me, starboard, ten me, starboard. Storm? My fiber. Storm. I'm here again. Storms.

Fibres. The warm. A distance. Storm. Hey, Storm, can you stop doing your storm? I mean, sorry, I'm sorry. I'm doing your your your location distances Yeah, you changed the story That's that now, okay, and also I'm gonna need you to press your mic and then talk, okay?

So can I swing Jason? I can't okay storm are we ready? Natalia Natalia Natalia Natasha Natalia Natalia Natasha All right. Storm, I'm only getting part of this because you're not pressing your mic and then talking. So I'm only hearing certain things, but I think you're still doing distances. So I don't get that.

Okay. I don't hear you storm. I need you to press the mic and then talk storm. Storm, I sense that you're trying to segue into a musical number, but right now we're heading right into a dolphin. Just please give me, just literally give me any number. I don't care what it is, just some number. Whatever I do, I'm not gonna hit that boom. The dolphin. He hits the dolphin. Like, plump. Like it's just like a full on. Well, at least they didn't have that jackass who was like,

you hit it. About last. No, what? You're going to hit it, you ran into it. You hit the dolphin and I'm wearing a burrow. That was funny. Yeah, you know, poor storm. It's like he's been so nervous.

He finally got to do it and he didn't know how to work his radio suddenly. I mean, what the hell? Oh God, these dolphins. It's gonna be all season long with them. We've already had them twice. Sandy, the first time was the first time Sandy had claimed she'd ever hit anything. And now it's twice in one season. You know, she's so pissed.

Oh man. Well, that brings us to the end of below deck Mediterranean. Thank you everybody for being here. We'll be back every day forever. Okay, we're never leaving. Thanks so much for being here. If you want our videos and bonus episodes and all that, that's patreon.com-watchwhat-crabins and go join winteristin' and go subscribe to that if you like Game of Thrones. And we will talk to you next time. We love you guys! Bye everyone! Watch what crap ends with like to think it's premium sponsors!

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