Watch What Crappens - Below Deck Med: Line in the Dirt

Episode Date: July 13, 2021

A couple that probably shouldn't wed does anyway on Below Deck Med, and a stew starts a war with the chef when she stands in his pile of dirt. This week's bonus episode is the second part of a two part Big Brother cast breakdown. Find all of our premium bonus episodes at https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensOur Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to watch what crap ends at free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Oh, but people are running around. Kids, what happens when there's so much that happens? Well, hello everybody. Welcome to Water Walk Rock. It's a podcast for all that crap that we just love to talk about. On your props!

I'm Ronnie and guess who's with me? Handsome, tall, gorgeous, smells good, great hair, by adorable shirt. His name has been Mandelker. Hi, Ben. Hi, I'm not sure that I smell so great today or that my hair is so great today, but I appreciate the sentiment anyway. Yeah, don't really with it, you know.

I'm not gonna... In people's heads now. Yes, now that you smell good and now, you know, people are like, you've been smells and this hair's stringy. Yeah, you know what? My hair is amazing and my smells are fantastic. And I'm I'm saying everybody. I'm saying I'm saying. I've been on it for three days.

Good. I am absolutely gobsmacked that I haven't lost 100 pounds. But yeah, it's pretty crazy what eating a few fruits will do to you. I'm like a drug addict over here. Like I'm not craving the fruit. Like it's nothing like that. I mean, I'm still dreaming of dominoes, but like I'm not sleeping all day. Just super weird. I'm like waking up and thinking, I should go outside and then I'm like, well, maybe I should eat a pizza because he wants to go outside. That's a very dangerous thought to start having, you know? So I'm gonna mind fuck, that's where I'm at. Okay, well, let me give you something to unfuck your mind,

something very happy and lovely. I wanna give a shout out to Jenny Agnew, who is a friend of one of our friends, Anna David, who has been on this podcast before, who is a talented writer, and that. And that's a separate subject. But Jenny Agnew listens to Crappens, and on top of that, she just finished her cancer treatment. So congratulations, Jenny.

We hope it's smooth sailing from here on out, I'm not just gonna know, because it's below deck, but congratulations, and congratulations to anyone who is going through that fight in our crap and family. But for right now, we got Jenny Agnews. So congratulations, Jenny.

We're so happy to hear this news. And anyone who's a friend of Anna Davids is a friend of ours. So that was the big shout out. That's the feel good moment for this episode. That's all about fighting about dirt. This is a dust pan fight episode. And as I was watching this, I was like, wow, so basically the producers are just writing a love letter to bend the season.

You know, yeah, I mean, it's sort of surprising that we got this far into, you know, the below deck extended universe without having a dust pan fight. Like, it's like, at last, here it is. We made it. You know, and it's only below deck that can get you excited about this shit too, because you mentioned it, and then I got excited to get to that part.

Because I have things to say. It's like I have things to say about your pilot dirt, sir. Yeah, don't tread on me. Literally don't tread on me. That's what the dirt is saying, Tilexy. So the episode opens up. There was a big cliffhanger about whether or not Kerry is going to marry Clint, the alcoholic Jim Kerry-esque character that's

on this boat. Will she, will she marry a total schmuck or will she actually make a good choice in her life? Spoiler alert. She doesn't take the good choice. So spoiler alert couples like this always end up getting married, you know, like the the divorce is as fun as the marriage because they just like to bitch at each other. Yeah, exactly. And Carrie is she has like the most stereotypical sob of all time because where we start up is her saying, I'm not marrying you tomorrow good. I don't want to marry you Either I don't want to and I'm gonna go tell them right now Because you're a little

And so he stomps out of the room and then you just hear going Like the most stereotypical sob like it's like if you were going to act in class like okay kids This is how you saw you do a three like a down the staircase And then I'd love this because as it goes as as it goes on, you just see him stalking around angrily and her sobbing more. I was just picturing Romona Singer in Morocco when she threw herself in the bed and like put her hands over her head and like mooped her chest a lot like she was sobbing. It sounded like that kind of a sob.

Yeah, like a very diaphragm forward sob. Like where the diaphragm's really working overtime. Don't see he hear me. Why doesn't she see me? I don't know. And Clint goes to his friend, he's like, we're not getting married. Do not go in there, okay? So everybody else, all the staff and stuff

are just going to bed. And Lexi has to work late and she's just bitching to herself, which these clips are becoming my favorite of Lexi, just bitching by herself. She's like, oh, how is Croatia? Oh, great. I saw it through a port hole. Great.

Thanks for asking. Carrying the vacuum up those fucking spiral stairs. And so then, like, go back. I love when those back entitlement. I do too. So then, Clint goes back to his room and we just heard And he goes back in the room and you just hear And and some of the people some of the crew are just sort of gossiping about it

I'm wondering what's going on and then Matt who's sort of just like inherently creepy is like so what they having Group sex, huh? You think they have in group sex? Last week I said that, or two weeks ago, I said that he sounded like Woody Allen. And I'm gonna walk that back cause I think it was just like one scene. He sounded sort of like Woody Allen. But now I'm thinking he's sort of like

Barney Rubble-esque sort of like a dirty, Barney Rubble-la. Yeah, he is kind of a, yep, he's doing, he's doing, he's doing, he's doing, he's doing, he's doing, he's doing, he's doing, he's doing, he's doing, he's doing, he's doing, he's doing, he's doing, he's doing, he's doing, he's doing, he's doing, he's doing, he's doing, he is kind of a, yep, he's with the doofreets. Yeah, you think he does. Hey Fred, you think they'll have in his group sex in here? Huh, Fred? Hey Fred, he's got a little bit of that. Yeah, for sure. I think the biggest thing about him is he always looks like he's been sobbing and also has a cold and also is going to get out of a white van and kidnap children. Like he is just kind of a creepy guy. But then, and also he's also gonna corner you

and tell you about like why the PC boys are the best band of all time. I mean, oh God. Yeah. So the next morning, and by the way, I thought he said, they're thinking they make up sex, Fred. They can then make up sex. They can't make up sex.

That's the best part. That's the best part, Fred. Whoa. Oh, that was bad. Oh, really? Are we gonna keep our texts on during the show now? Actually, no, this was- No, no, guess what? My texts were off.

This was that bullshit where my laptop was like, you have an appointment, and it's so important that we're gonna override your headphones. So that I hate when they do that. I bought the headphones in for a reason laptop. Yeah, that's rude. It's rude. So it's next morning.

Yeah, so it's the next morning, Matthew's making craps. And I'm like, oh my God, I suddenly like Matthew again. Listen, I love a good crape stuffed with some, you know there's like some white, melty cheese in there. What's that called that like like powdery kind of like a Gluggear or a Fontina? Like a ricotta? Don't they put more trashy?

Crème fraiche. Like what's in a bulini? What's in a bulini? It's well a bulini is just like a pancake. Oh no, with cheese. Oh, a crème fraiche. You people would normally put a crème fraiche, a dollop of crème fraiche on a bulini. Right, no, with cheese. Oh, a crumb fresh. People would normally put a crumb fresh, a dollop of crumb fresh on a bleening. Right, no, I'm not thinking bleening.

I'm thinking the blitz, blitz, blitz. Blitz. Oh, blitz would be more like a ricotta. A ricotta. Yeah, ricotta. Oh, girl, I love you, Katzistelli. Sorry, I didn't remember your name, blitz, but you know what? Hi.

Okay. You know what? Matt is a blitz. Like, I feel like if you were to say, say like what breakfast food is everyone on this boat, I'm not sure who's what, but Matt is definitely a blinst. Well then you're making me like him again, even more. So that's true. Now he's okay by me.

Okay, let's, let's, let's, well, I'll come up with something more to, to unblinst him. Okay, because, well, I don't say he has a sloppy crape. He doesn't know how to fold the crape right, So he does like a square fold, which, you know, I mean, make a better effort. It was like a very Frank Gary crape. It was sort of like ruffled and architectural. It was like, oh, congratulations. You just designed like Frank Gary's new building

because Frank Gary's gonna take a picture of it and just like, wow. I think that was a thing on the Simpsons once where they took some trash and Frank Gary's like, oh, my next building. Oh, yeah, we really needed to update the design of the crate. So glad you're here. So it's Ruffle Crap.

Yeah, Courtney's like, oh, my last crew, I didn't do many cabins, but I want to do service. Because it's not very social doing the laundry. Oh. And they've showed it. This is now, I think, the second or third time we've seen this photo of her on some other boat, where she's like in like a bonnet or something,

wiping the floor. Like, she just came out of some sort of pride and prejudice like cosplay yacht I don't know what it is but she's like I just have to clean the floors before I get my muffins from mother so then we see Malia with the deck crew and they're talking about the fighting couple and she's like yeah they went downstairs because like they were fighting. I mean, the couple that's supposed to get married today, they were fighting. So I mean, I come, Elias, I'll judge you about everyone else's relationship.

Don't forget, we saw your last one. Fucking plus your five. Yeah, let's not forget the fight about a slice cucumber, okay? So, Elias, like talk about being with someone who's yelling at you. You dated Adam, man. Tom, and Tom, Tom and Adam, great. So she's like, I mean,

the fighting is supposed to start once you're married. And then David, there's joking about how she's pessimistic about relationships. And then cast a David who's like, has the hotspour. And he's like, do I need to change that? A-oo, do I need to change it? Oh, do I need to change it? Oh, I like one, Lea. Oh, really?

Really, dude. Please back down, David. David's, I think all the guys have an assignment that they have to be in love with somebody this season. Yeah, I think so. Everyone has a crush. I feel like everyone in the boat is trying to find a crush because later on, the girls are just,

they're even checking out the guys who don't even get to be on the show. Like the proper workers, like the engineers, who are admittedly very hot. That guy is. Oh my god. He's like, oh my god, Martin with an E. Oh, that's his name Martin. No. Martin with an E.

Well, there was Martin and there was another guy. The other guy, we only got to see a silhouette of. But like, hey, don't you like Jitem? They're like, yeah, Jitem's hot. I don't know how that's what it is in my head. Martin, I don't know. So I'm just gonna move forward. So Z is, I'm pondering Martin's now.

I'm like, hmm, which Martin's do I like, and which Martin's don't I like? Could I get a boner for a Martin? Carry on, Ben. You good. So Z is talking about Courtney and he has to question her. So that's happening. Then Lloyd is sleeping and then Tarez. Tarez, you may remember from her most her breakout her breakout quote.

It's a mega. Yeah. I'm amazing. Yeah. Sammy. It's terrible. It's terrible. It's terrible.

It's terrible. It's terrible. I think it's terrible, Sam. Cool. It's a man. It's a man. It's a man. So she really is the worst. She is.

So yeah, Terez. So she, I, all that talk, by the way, what we just did to tell you everyone this, Terez is awakened at the table. That's a guess. But she does do it horribly, right? Yeah. She just like, say, like, with her duck lips, all she just always looks pissed off. So it's super awkward and then we cut to Matthew because a thunderstorm is coming. And Matthew's like, what's the vibe Fred? You know what? My knee just inverted.

I think there's a thunderstorm coming Fred. They can't work. They can't work. They can't do it. So then breakfast is served and people are coming down and stuff and Carrie comes down. This is the bride and she's still kind of mad from last night. So she comes down and Clint is just doing that thing like a little drunk childhood.

He knows he was wrong. He's like, there she is. Look who it is, it's my baby. Yeah, baby. You know what, baby, you should have some food because that will give baby, yeah baby. You know what baby, you should have some food cause that will give you last thing. Yeah, he's like deeply annoying. I also believe he's still drunk.

He's just like, he's weird because he has, he has like that Jim Carrey energy and Jim Carrey is great on screen, but I don't think I want to be with a Jim Carrey persona on a yacht, but it also has like a little of that late 90s Ryan Reynolds energy, too. Do you remember Ryan Reynolds in the late 90s when he was on two guys a girl in a pizza place? I don't need two guys a girl in a pizza place energy on my luxury yacht.

I mean, it's a mania. It's a mania. And so one of the ladies, Katie, is like, Hey, Jana, or whatever, what's her name? Carrie. Hey, Katie and Carrie and Clint. Say I'm in Mike and Jeff. She's like, Hey, are you ready for a day, huh, isn't gonna be fun?

He's like, yeah, well. Cause Carrie still will look at him or speak to him. Yeah, Katie, by the way, is actually the chiefs do. So it was more like, are you ready for today? Cause she won. She was finally finding the way to know here. It's only up. It's up to me.

Get off my ass. So Katie, she's just trying to find it. If there's a wedding, it's still happening. And they're like, they're like, yes. And she's like, well, I was hoping not to do it because, you know, love Conk is all right, but, uh, well. So then, uh, the cake was. All of these two got married and we can do whatever we want. not to do it because you know love conquers all right but oh well so then I'm going to be too get married we can do whatever we want wine because a lot of

super guys it's a mega it's gonna be a mega wedding on a mega so then um guy changed it super so guess guess who's not getting a temp today follow my change It's a super or putting a red cape on it is a super when this boat goes in a Funbo it comes out as a super yeah, but you like to take your vows at the Some set so we do some set vows and she's like you know I was going to hope you Now I wouldn't have to do this But oh yeah, you've already said that so then delivery the cake is here you guys so cake drama coming down the swim platform Yeah, and they totally are hazing Z because they make him first of all

I don't know why they accept this cake at the end of that line of like rickety You know floating are those the things that they call floaties or whatever, or they call nautis, right? It's like why would you accept the cake there on your like unstable, wobbly, fake, pure when you could just accept the cake by the back of the boat and just like grab it onto the deck? So they have, you just see Z with this thing and Mollia is like holding him from behind just if that's gonna help at the moment that he topples into the ocean. So they're just like bringing the cake in. And then Matt, it's like a fucking Matt. He's like, whoa Fred, on my first full day with Gus on the boat,

it's an intense amount of work to have. Wow, but at least I get to order the cake, it makes me feel very anxious. Oh, I'm like, you feel anxious. First of all, everything makes this guy feel anxious. He's a pee- he's a pee-pot, he's anxious. But now he's gonna talk about how all the intense amount of work that he has, that he has, that he watched the first episode of thisot, he's anxious. But now he's gonna talk about how all the intense amount of work that he has,

that he has, did he watch the first episode of this season? Did he see that? Here's my note on that, dope voice. Oh, so did I wrote down. See? Yeah, pretty good. Pretty good voice, it works. All right, it makes me pretty good that great.

So Anchor's down, everybody, and Sandy's like, oh my God, this is 25 mats of gales of windy wind. You know what, I don't like that. Okay, this is a, maths of gales of windy wind. You know what? I don't like that. This is a Hannah wind blowing through here. I don't like it. The old Hannah wind. This is the money I'd wind coming through here.

Right. And then Carrie and Clint are like, they go into their room and cares like, Clint, will you come here? And he's like, I love you. I mean, we're still getting married, right? Please. And then we get Lloyd being wacky and doing, I'm here and he's like, I love you. I mean, we're still getting married, right? I'm so, ugh, please. And then we get Lloyd being wacky and doing,

I don't know, wrapping or something. I'm not sure what he's doing. Yeah, and then it's doing like a dance song. He's like, we need girls in here, we need girls in here. Yeah, something like that. Yeah. So then Perez is like, Oh, hang on, I've been pinning down,

I've got my hot top and cut it down. Yeah, hot top. Let's get rid of her. Yeah, please. Like, why are you bringing first gum into this? Oh, we don't need this right now. OK, we do not need this. Oh my god, I saw a feathery on her day.

And I was like, oh my god, it was like, fur scum, like fur scum. She wouldn't say, run for it, stront, she'd be like, run for it, run! Run! Like, it's a marathon, a marathon. A marathon, for it.

Oh. So then, um, Hey, uh, Captain Sandy to the interior, I'm on moral now. So then um, hey, uh, captain Sandy to the interior chef department everyone. Uh, 25 knots of wind. I don't know if you heard about that honey eyes wind. Uh, you're gonna feel it. You're gonna feel it. Let's get our captain Glenn on and move this boat around. Okay, you're feeling it. You're ready. And so then everything starts to bumble around and everything and Matt's like, my cake! And, but everything's fine. And then he's like, you know, I'm as ready as I can

be to do a wedding alone, Fred. But you know what? This is gonna be a lot. Cause when you think a wedding, you think elaborate, right? It's a lot of pressure to do on your own, Fred. I picked the wrong day to come back. I shouldn't have come back today doing the wedding all by myself. You literally are not doing anything different.

You're serving three courses, like you know only would serve three courses. Get over yourself. Literally get over yourself. Also with all that like, all that like sloshing in like, oh my god, look at the, it's windy and the water's sloshing out of the hot tub and the cake is might fall over and

then almost sounds like oh good it's calm now okay yeah we're right past that's fun okay good I think great that was okay so um so then Sandy is like hey Malia okay Malian Katie guess what this weather it's when I don't think we're not gonna be able to do the shore no shore no fireworks you have to tell the shore. No shore, no fireworks. You have to tell the guests that, yeah, tell them you have to do your food on the boat, okay? Now here's the important thing. I'm the preacher and I need time to practice.

I'm so nervous to officiate. I do a lot of public speaking now, okay? But that's mostly women empowerment on both type speeches, you know? But my palms are sweating. I mean, I don't know if I'm gonna be steps speeches, you know, but my palms are sweating. I mean, I Don't know if I'm gonna be able to do this. I don't know if I do you believe in yourself enough to believe in me doing The oh god, I can't do this. I can't do it. What the hell calm down. You're gonna read it off your damn my phone anyway Yeah, literally from like wedding vows.com or or what if what she officiate, officiate whatever. So so now we see Malia

bossing around Z and she's like you know I just love having someone who's green you know it's just so fun to teach them when I have time so he's teaching Z Z is learning Z is learning and but he's actually one of, I'm actually so happy to see like a good learner because I'm, it's, we've had a lot of trauma of the people who don't know what the hell they're doing, but they act like they do know what they're doing. I like that Z is just like, he just wants to learn and just smiling and is just so sweet and lovely as opposed to like literally I think it's been on the show. Totally got this, totally got this. And they like throw the line over a gas or something.

Yeah, it is. Yes. So Katie is like, she has to go break the news to the gas. So she's like, guys, I expect this in the wedding has to be here on the boat. You know, sometimes I've usually say yes in my job, but sometimes I have to say, no, are we okay with that, ladies? And Teresa's just like, she's already right. Like way after here. And she doesn't say

anything, but you know in her head, she's like, yeah, she's going to go screaming, making it into a a pillow and her friend actually turns to her. Her friend turns her and goes, okay, so then we'll just have to take deep breaths and be cool, right, to res. Oh my god, yeah. It's om-ne-geh-geh. Um, so let's see. The deck crew are putting together decorations together and they're, you

know, ugly as ugly as hell. And Malia is asking them how long they've all been single. And David's like, oh, you're in a house. I've been drinking a year and a half. And he is like, basically my whole life, I've been single actually. Like, he's like, I'm only 13, so. And then David is, David's like, yeah I had a girlfriend on a boat who cheated and cheated on me with someone else on the boat. Yeah so we did like a two to three month, months aboard with him in her like, you know, nice guys finished last.

We know with my work, my personal life and all this shit, my girlfriend's here I was too nice and so she felt she could do anything to get away with it and then said then she cheated on me and was like, do you you but you still want to be with me, right? And I was like absolutely fucking not right right? Nice guys finish last I was like absolutely fucking not. Thank you very much for the good talk. What do you like some tea? Wait, and then of course I gave her a back massage because I'm in how could I not do that she was stressed out One hour to the wedding

So Katie is telling us, I was in wedding management and it was my dream which is old because I don't really want to get married myself. Well, Jack, we fell in love like I thought I made a soul mate, but I'm really glad we didn't get married. As much as I love Jack, he can be

fucking not me. But he got my face on his arms. That's the same thing, right? It's big commitment. There's something goofy about Katie. I can't wait. I really got her. Katie's out. She's gonna go. She's, she's, she's gonna break, which is gonna be amazing. Also, when she was talking about being in wedding management to show evidence of this, they put up a picture of her with basically Mario singer. Like it

wasn't Mario singer, but it was like Australia's answer to Mario singer. I was like, is that Mario singer? So then Singer? So then Matt is, he's trying to figure out if he's gonna be making orders for the shore and Lexi's like, you're preparing food on board. You hear me, you hear me? He's like, no. Yeah, preparing food on board. So then Courtney has some stiff nips,

because it's chili and Tarez is in the mirror putting her earrings on and getting ready for this wedding. She's wearing red to a wedding, which gross Terez. And she's putting her earrings on, she's like, oh my god, I love her. These earrings are perfect for a meyat, a meyat. So, um, now I'm going to practice. I'm going to practice practice practice. I gotta practice my vows. Okay, carry Drunk guy Clint Clint you guys have expressed commitment in the love promise You just made the keep and cherish love a loving cherish promises of wheels of change and love section 237 A of the charter of gosh ding it time, look, get out of my brain!

Get out of my brain. Oh man, that's pretty beautiful. Yeah, I have to say, that was pretty beautiful, right? And Martin is there and he goes, eh, it's okay. See, it's so hot. Yeah, it's so hot. That's how you know someone's really hot because they just literally don't care what anyone else

has to say, that's hot perplage. Totally hot. So, because they know everyone's still gonna be friends with them. So then, it's two minutes before the wedding and Kierry's getting into her dress. And Clint is, he's in a suit, and he's in a suit, and he's on the deck and he goes, life, life!

I'm like, okay, you know what? Throw yourself off of this boat. I cannot deal with you anymore. This rainbow, thank you Lord! Reimel Reimel! What? Like, he is wasted. He is wasted. Enjoy this. Carry. So now everyone's lining up. The women that Bridesmaids are dressed literally in a shade of pepperoni.

Like it's like they look like they could be toppings for pizza. Not a good look, I think, But, you know, a standard flex for a bride, I guess, to make her bride's maids look terrible. Yeah, and the captain's on nervous. And so everybody's getting ready to do this. And Z, of course, like, I'd love to get married, have a couple of babies he's running around and we get everybody's V1 marriage. And Lloyd is like, marriage is terrifying. I mean, even dating, you know, are not to be with him with with my goofiness, but it takes weeks, months, sometimes years. They take it a long time. I've dated. And David's like, you know, I'm a 29 year guy. I love kids. I love dogs. You

know, I'm just looking for anyone who's not going to be a major hassle. I mean, listen, just anything that walks, you know, I'll be happy with it. You can cheat on me. I'll say I'll mind, but I really don't mind. I just am happy to have someone I can call my own. I'll get your breakfast, I'll get your lunch, I'll get your dinner. I'll build you a house. I'll give you all my money. Nice guys finish last, just like here's to us. Okay, this is like, oh my god, we made this happen. We did it. I mean, it's shitty weather. The bride and groom are arguing, but we did it. Thank nothing can go

wrong. Bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum a few times. I wasn't as good as when, um, what's her face fell down the stairs on, uh, below deck selling yacht. What's that face? You mean the only person with morals here in this reunion? Yeah, they're passing with morals. And when she went down that staircase, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. That was great. Yeah. Good, good time for staircases. But she's okay. Don't everyone worry. She was okay. Yeah. But she's okay. Don't ever one word. She was okay. Yeah, so let's see.

Courtney stuck down with the bride, Carrie. And I mean, you can't exactly ask the woman like, so your guy is so cheap that he's using an already paid for yacht to get married to you and he's a drunk. And actually, you've got a little throw upon your wedding dress. You can't say any of that. So she's like drunk and actually you've got a little throw up on your wedding dress. You can't say any of that. So she's like,

wow, you look amazing. I hope you have a wonderful life. Oh, she's sitting out here, is that? Yeah, she does not know what to say. She's like, have you ever been on the prod and prejudice crews? So fun. So now it's the wedding time.

So Carrie starts coming up the stairs. And Clint is like doing wasted gym carry faces to her as she like approaches. He's like his eyebrows are up and he's like squinty eyed and like his tongue is practically sticking out. And he's just like the biggest douchebag you can imagine out of wedding. And he's wasted and he's trying to pretend he's crying

you know like squeezing his eyes really tight. So the captain, like, wow, lucky girl. Your man smells like T'Kiva during your bath. Have fun with that. So the captain is like, by the way, it's just like, you know what, the stereotype in every wedding is that there's always the best man who gets wasted and gives a terrible speech.

It's like, what would happen if that best man actually got married? And here it is, It's Clint. Yes. So the captain's like guys I have to confess Did I brought drugs on board just kidding that was Hannah. We took care of that. Get off my ass America. Okay, it's over Okay, so this is the first time I've ever done this and it's the first time you've done this. So guess what we're in the same boat Literally, she didn't even say pun intended. I can believe it. I know. So she reads out her vows and she doesn't do any of the stuff she planned before. She's just like, do you marry her? Do you marry him? Great. You know,

that's great. You know, you're both a gale. Okay. If I, if I had a name, you're kind of with your both gales, you know what? And two gals make a padma. So have a good life. I was oddly annoyed by the fact that when she said, Clint, will you take Carrie to be your lawfully wedded wife? He says, I will. And then when she says, Carrie, will you take Clint to be your lawfully wedded husband?

She goes, I do. I'm like, you know, you guys aren't even on the same page. You're either both got to be I wills or both I do, but no, I will and I do. I do not accept it. This is this marriage, as deemed by maritime law is invalid Your grammar is not compatible Please leave it's more like just the syntax. I want like correlating syntax. I want parallel syntax

I don't want someone if I But you know the thing is also if someone says I will Even if I thought it's probably be I do I probably would say I will also just to match them. And so then I also wonder, was she saying I do just to kind of be like, fuck him, I told him it's I do, so I'm still going to do it to prove it, which means that they're already having a fight with their vows. Well, yeah, because he's actually doing it right, because if the question is, will you take her and the question is, yes, I will, not I do. It's like, Carrie's, you know, a peronace over over there but she's the one who's fucking all of this up she did actually fuck it up I do right I agree because it was like her wedding she's like

it was her big day she's probably actually mad at Sandy she's like I told Sandy that the phrase should be do you take this man and I'm just gonna stick to it because I've always dreamed of being able to say I do so I'm gonna say I do and fuck it fuck them both yeah and now who looks stupid? Everyone. Okay. Everyone. We're all in the same boat, you know? Haven't done it before. Hey, Karee and Clint. I now pronounce you Husband and wife. You may kiss the bride. He goes Did she say Clinton Carrie Yokel? Did she say Clinton carry Yokel? Yeah, yoder or something.

Yoder, yoder. Clinton carry Yokels? Would you like to be married? Okay, you will, you do whatever. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crapence commercial. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, someday's parenting is unbearable.

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So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts, you can listen ad free on the Amazon music or Wondery app. So then we're going to get some bacon, blue cheese, pinwheels, some sesame tuna, wasabi, mayo, like wow, that sounds like delicious food to make out to after. Yeah, like a Caesar salad, a Caesar salad lollipop. So then, so now there's a huge rainbow,

and now Clint is crying into his hands. Jesus! Jesus, Jesus, thank you. Thank you, thank you. This guy is always did. Welcome to the rest of your life, Carrie. Well, she doesn't seem much about her. I mean, she's definitely more

Tixer she's probably a fixer, you know, this is probably like a like a reinterpretation of leaving Las Vegas, right? Yeah, leaving Croatia So then let's see there Lexi's kind of bossy we see because she's like, um, do you want to focus on Decorations and all take see because she's like, um, do you want to focus on decorations and all take tables? Katie, Katie's like, whatever. Fine. And then we got a mat and he's like, wow. You know Captain Sandy, that was your first sweating. Good job. Maybe you could do my wedding one day. And she's like, oh, you're getting married. He's only if I find two girls, I want a thruple. And she's getting married, he's only if I find two girls, I want a thrupple and she's like, that's funny.

That's a funny, that's funny. What a funny thing. And then he goes, to me, non-monogamy is normal. I'm a share bear. I'm like, nice branding, you're cheating ass. You're a share bear, you're a cheater. That's what you're saying right now. Because you didn't say Polly.

He didn't say Polly. He said non-monogamy, which does not. I don't think that's the same as Polly. I think he just wants more people to fill in when he's like, you know, had it with doing the rest of the work for the day, you know? He was like, it was so good. Yeah, what are you skinning here? I, you know what, I'm sorry, I'm sorry I want to be in this marriage, but I can't do it anymore, I'm anxious. I think I hurt my knee, I think I gotta get out of here. Okay, luckily I've got someone else to fill in from you.

I gotta get out of here, I'm sorry. Oh, just some skiddle bite. I'm bella. So Katie tells the guest, did you guys see the rainbow? And Carrie's like a psychic told my mother that my grandfather would show up at my wedding as a rainbow.

And she's like, Oh my God, that's gonna make me cry because there was a rainbow here. When my grandfather, the pest, way, there was a moth in the room. And now every time I see a moth, I know that my grandfather's there. I was like, wait, you're taking down the romance of this scene, Katie. Yeah. Like, you know, it's one thing when Durinda said a red balloon or even a quarter, like a nice, but a moth, I mean, or the range of, I mean, there were two rainbows,

one at the beginning and one at the end of the wedding. That's something, but like every time you turn on the lights outside in the dark, like really. I mean, this is Tany West. She was like, she's like, well, she's Tany West, she said, every time my anxiety is really bad a mouth will fly a bar me. I'm like Are you having anxiety at night while you're sitting at a porch? I mean? I did you luck yourself out did the sliding door did the sliding glass door lock itself and you're nervous that you can't get in

What's going on with you Katie? What like what are the odds that one of the most ubiquitous insects? Whatever you know grace grace you with its presence while you're going through something. Like, it's like a moth. It's like just the least poetic version of this that we've seen. Like, actually it's got a butterfly, you know? I know, these are butterfly.

Like, like, like, like, try to have some whimsy. Like, even it's like, oh, I see a bluebird or there's a cloud in the sky or like the ice cream truck goes by maybe a bit like a moth. It's like every time I'm having anxiety sometimes I see an oil slick. I know it's my grandpa. Yeah, we're monsters. So then your monster gets a call from Tom and bed and he's like wait, can I also say wait? I'm sorry And then in response to the rainbow thing you know what to rest does she starts crying us The rainbows only the only one to get a good yelp review from to res

It's rainbow The rainbows only the only one to get a good yelp review from Terez So Malia's in bed and she gets a call from Tommy's like I miss you. I just wanted to talk has the new crew Has a new crew what if they don't what the potatoes have they throw them in the trash if they have to better Tell me right now because I would not be made to look like a good family to eat on the phone while you're on the bed. I don't know potatoes, it's a big. I'm a... am I meant? Am I meant? Are you saying that I'm meant to cut this... this cucumber all by myself on this y'all?

I'm here alone on this y'all, my liya. And you didn't even come and join me on this y'all. So you can slice this cucumber. All right, just a cucumber slice of that. I went to school, I went to... I studied under gracious, I said under... Under the... God, Gordon Ramsay. And now I'm here, I'm meant to slice a cucumber, great chest. I said under under under the god Gordon Ramsay

And now I'm here. I'm meant to slice a cucumber a cucumber I'm gonna throw it in the beama. I'm done with this So she's like yeah, it's really weird to talk to him like I'm pretty raw I just I want to still talk to him like normal, but like I fucking hate him at the same time Just plenty of fish in the sea, especially ones that don't talk to other fishes I feel like actually a lot of the fish cheat. Sorry, sorry to say that. Yeah, I think fish, I think fish cheat. I saw a video on Facebook of a horse. What do you call them? A sea horse giving birth. Oh my God. You know, I almost wrote a complaint letter.

Are you going to get the point horse point? I'm gonna be carrying this. This is a lot of babies just flying out of you. You know, there's a yeah. No, no, no, no, no, when those sea horses, that's what you call a big old hippocampine, you know, like vomit of babies right there. That's a lot of babies. Like get out into the world, all of you. Multiply.

Yeah, seahorse is get credit because I think it's like the dads that raise their little babies or something or like, or there's something with a dad. Maybe the dad gets pregnant. I don't know what it is. But of course, it's like, oh wow, congratulations. One fish dad is responsible out of literally all the fish in the sea. There's like one fish jet that's responsible. So like, give the reward. Like, look at the seahorse. It actually cares about its babies. I was like, oh, so now, let me tell you something. Fish patriarch is a real thing, okay?

Real thing. I will say that seahorse are the shyest of fish because to have that many, there's gotta be millions of seahorse. After seeing that seahorse give birth, there have to be gazillion of them. Why aren't they like everywhere? Why aren't they every Disney movie? They die. They die. That's why they have so many babies because there's so many predators out there.

There's like, so to be efficient to see must be like so hard because like there's predators everywhere and they're like from above, from below, from they're like in the sand. It's like everywhere you go, it's like, am I going to be in a lot today? Is today the day, am I going to be in a lot of life? My octopus teacher, one of the most harrowing films of 2020, everybody. Fucking pajamas sharks. Forever.

So, let's see. So then the captain is checking with Matt and the captain cues Cutes making these comments, but she doesn't even know that she's making a joke She's like oh hey, Matt. So you're doing okay. I mean you got your feed-out to you, huh? Thank you. It's the guy who like couldn't walk last So then Lexi is setting the table and Katie's like oh Lexi Well, we need to do the what the water glies has to go on top of the main knife like this And it's a triangle makes a little triangle Lexi's like oh, that's so funny because each chiefs do always has something different Like I was taught you put it here and here and here and Katie's like you know what?

It's a busy die. I don't really need this conflict. I'm like Listen Lexi is no not great, but I I don't really need this conflict. I'm like, listen, Lexi is not great, but I would hardly say that this is conflict. This was, well, I mean, it's, she was talking back a little bit in that she was, it's have saying, okay, cool. She was kind of giving excuse, but this is, I feel like this is a lot more conflict to come.

Yeah, the last war. Yeah, the great glass war. So, so the guys are doing more shots. And of course, we've got somebody ordering millions of espresso shots and. X and X. Or espresso. X, press so, shots.

Don't forget, there's an X in there on Blow Deck. And so then, Katie and Lexi, I'm sorry, Courtney and Lexi go on break, but Katie hasn't been on break all day because she's like the cheats doing, she has to be there. So she's doing that. And then we see Matt, he goes into the freezer to get the cake and then he hear,

he like, first of all, he bops himself, which is like an ongoing issue with him. He doesn't seem to have spatial awareness with his body and low overhangs. And then, and then he's like, oh fuck, oh god, the wedding cake, I dropped the wedding cake, this is a fucking disaster. And then they pull it out and it's like, totally fine,

except for like a little bit of frosting on the cardboard. Yeah, it's like where it hits the side of the box and you just have to take a knife and like, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm. And so, we cut to the guys just to hear this. Like this big huge burp, which I'm sure was Cassie Clint. And then back to Matt and he's like, okay, I'm about to plate the scallops friend. I'm about to plate the scallops.

Oh wait, we mixed apart. Okay, so Lexi, okay, so Matt sees Lexi and he's like, okay, I got scallops. Okay, so just tell me, just tell me when to see it So I can fire the scallops and she's like, oh, you can fire it after just sat Yeah, he says I need to know when it's exactly Three when they're exactly three minutes away and she's like, yeah, you can fire up the scallops And so then yeah, then we have this like burp and so Matt like makes these scallops and He's like, all right Fred. I got Matt like makes these scallops and he's like,

all right Fred, I got the scallops ready to go. And Katie's like, I'm easy tohigge, not everyone's at the table. He's like, I'm not a tiger, I'm a share bear. What's going on here? What the fuck, Fred? What the fuck? It's kind of spitting out.

And we see the gaster like, yeah, the gaster like, oh, you know, let's eat everybody. We should sit down and Tara is like I'll be there in five First I have to check in on my pet sheep So So then so then so Mack goes up to Katie's like no Lexi's Lexi said that you guys were already ready already okay And she goes alright to I'm going favorite. I'm always the comms of me because I actually know okay And he's like yeah, well she said you guys are doing the water so then Katie goes up to one fire one one fire She said the friend she said you guys are doing the water. So then Katie goes up to water one fire water one fire. She said the Fred. She said it It was like dear Fred water one fire

So Katie tells Lexi Don't tell him like let me do it basically and she's like um, I literally Only told him we're doing waters. Okay, and I remember this well because my talent as Miss Bahamas was remembering things, okay? And I don't want to talk about the fact that I was Miss Bahamas, but I was Miss Bahamas. But then we got to her just saying a couple minutes ago. Oh, she just sat them at the table. You can fire it up. Yeah, so then she goes over to Magos. Did you not hear me when I said I have to pour waters and wines? But she said fire, you said fire friend, I mean listen, it's okay this time, but next time fire means fire friend. Yeah, and then Lexi goes, I find it difficult when the chain of command is not to the T and like not respectful.

Like that's not gonna fly with me. I'm like, okay, I'm sorry that it's not gonna fly with you, person who works for someone. Like, like, you're not the boss here. Like you are, like, it's not the, it's not their job to make you feel better about you doing your job. Or I guess it would be helpful, maybe in certain leadership positions. But the point is this, she is, like, she is like very entitled. She's like, I guess I'm only seeing Croatia through a portal. I'm like, yeah, because your job is to be on top, not to be on touring Croatia. So Matt tells the stews in their little stew area. He's like, listen, I'm not going to fire the first course from now on until everyone is seated. Okay? And they're like, oh, God, fine. Okay. Yeah, don't care. They're like literally don't care. It's like, he's punishing them.

Like, guess what? Here's the new rule. No one gets the food until they're all sitting down. Courtney's like, Courtney gives a look like, I don't know, Courtney hates him. I feel like Courtney despises him after the first episode. Yeah. And Katie is like, okay, so she takes the meal up.

And the first course is local seed scallop, not foreign, local, okay? Right here, possibly under this boat, very, very local. Okay, we are in the sea. We found a way to get the local seed scallop on Celeryac puree, on Celeryac's disease puree. In Celeryac disease. And topped with a truffle popcorn and clinkos truffle popcorn Thank you

This is the most prominent trouble Me My mother told me That when my grandmother is singing about me We're getting a trouble popcorn So then Malia puts Zian and her watch and then he's like all stressed He's like nervous about it and and Malia takes a photo of him in the in the chair And it is like the most adorable photo. Like it's so cute.

And then he sends it to his brothers, he's like, hey, look at me. I guess he's not like a watch. I guess he's not like a watch. Like the first person in the history of below deck to be excited about this. So Malia just goes right down and fixes a cake in two seconds. She's like, that was super hard. And, and I'll decorate this for a while, I guess. Since you're not even going to decorate the

fucking cake. You bought from a store, Matt. I know. Like, congratulations on getting married. Here is your wedding cake that was decorated by the post. So then, um, Lexi and Matt, so she comes in and she's like, um, can we get the chops like as fast as possible? Cause they're like, they're like this. They're like this. That's what they're literally snapping up there. Okay, literally. It's like West Side Story out there.

Okay. Can we get the chops? Like West Side Story. So, um, so then, uh, he, they bring up a rack of New Zealand lamb on Ratatouille and they serve it and Terezgas, um, I don't eat pets. I'm like, well, it's not like cats. Get them out of my face. I don't eat pets. Can you not eat cats? I'm not a cat. I'm like, so do you just have a sheep that you, you have, I'm sorry, do you have a sheep that you have as a pet? Like, do you bring it in like a, like, how do you just have a sheep that you? I'm sorry, do you have a sheep that you have as a pet? Like, do you bring it in like, how do you get it to the vet?

Like, do you go on walks with your sheep? Like, what's the deal? Yeah, I feel like Lam is pretty standard, man. Yeah. Give me a jaw ball. Give me something that's not a pet. I'm getting pets. Okay, I don't eat pets.

Okay, don't you know what's a famous pet? That's because Mary out of the lamp. Okay, it's not Mary out of the little gorilla. Okay, it's not about about lambs of bad. Okay, Mary out of the lamp. Okay, most prominent land I listen to my life. Her preference sheet it didn't say that she didn't meet pets. So I'm not really sure what to do with that. she didn't eat pit so I'm not really sure what to do with it. So she's like um will you be able to just eat the ratatouille? She's just um the mouse from the Disney movie because I'm pretty sure even though he was independent he ended up as a pet I'm pretty sure. I don't eat animals and Disney movies. I do not let all you remember that, do you? Okay, I did not eat Ryan, I did eat.

What's next, Dory? He's bringing me fucking Dory's head on his bike. You're gonna ask him to eat that, right? Oh, you're gonna bring me some, you're gonna bring me some bugs, like, literally, all the bugs live, not a bug staff.

Oh, what a nightmare of you being cheese. So Katie goes down and she's like, well, she doesn't eat land. Can she have red or two? I mean, listen, don't take it personally. She's just wasted me person. And then we see Teraz. She gets throughout a two and she just throws the plate on the table. Yeah, and the bills.

I don't need food that could have had a pet on it. So then Matt downstairs is just sweeping away. He's just like cleaning up the galley and everything. So Lixie comes stomping in and she's, because people want more lamb. Everyone wants lamb. Everyone loves the lamb except for Terez. So Lixie comes stomping in and she's like, she said you can play some extra lamb.

He's like, okay Fred, but watch that pile of dirt right there. That very small pile of dirt, because it's literally like the size of like a receipt, you know, it Fred, but watch that pile of dirt right there. That very small pile of dirt. Because it's literally like the size of like a receipt, you know, it's like a tiny little pile of dirt. Yeah, check what plate the lamb please. And he's like, well, grab a plate. Dirt, dirt. She brings a plate. He's like, you're stepping in my dirt. You're stepping in my pile. I'm in my dirt pile. Get out of my dirt pile. Dirt pile. Don't worry about it. Don't worry about it. And then she's just like picking up the lamb lollipops and shoving them down her face She's two of them. It's shocking. She just eats it

Like just eat the energy tells him thing which is really weird. Why wouldn't he say something? I know well it cuz she's like don't worry about the fucking dirt right now is not the time And then she steps on the pile again and goes, can you please not step on that? Fred, I just swept the dirt pile. Don't worry about it, I will sweep it up. Okay, just focus on putting the lamp on the plate and then he's very loosie. Cause like, you can't talk to me like that.

Like you're the boss, I'm in charge. Never again, never again, get out. She's like, whatever, non-beauty pageant winner. Yeah, so she brings up the lamb and Matt's so mad. He's like, the fucking girl in my right there. Am I right? So they're like, hey, great lamb. We want some more lamb.

Get us some more. Yeah, lamb. Give us some pets. Yeah, bring us some lamb on leashes. All right, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And of course, he doesn't have any more lamb.

I mean, it's not like she ate all the lamb But like he could have provided at least two more pieces So he is pass. He's like she just ate everything. I mean, you don't touch until you're sure the guests are done and Lexi's like I'm so sorry, but we add a lamb. I don't eat This is the most prominent pet I've ever petted? Okay. Oh geez. So now, um, me and Wallyl Z is like really nervous about his first talking.

The next day, just while everyone knows that's where Z's had that. And then Clint makes a toast. He's like, I just want to say how thankful and grateful I am. I'm sitting here. I got a beautiful wife My stomach is full of pets and I'm just I'm so happy I'm basically burping my pets smart over here Don't tell the SESPCA, okay, all right. I have a class action lawsuit against my stomach. So Matt has the staff take up the cake or he comes up he follows the cake up but he's like I didn't want to be part of the cake service because I didn't want him to ask

him about the cake you know because then I'd have to say yeah I bought it but you know what I just did a multi-course service I mean I can buy a cake. Now you fucking can't you suck you need to get out of here sir. Yeah. You're not can buy a cake. Now you fucking can't you suck. You need to get out of here, sir. Yeah. You're not just buy a cake. It's part of the show. Stressing you out with cakes is part of it. Yeah, we've seen many below deck chefs pull off the cake, okay? You're cheating. Um, cheating, cheater, cheater, cheater brand. So then um, he gets out of there and then they're eating the cake and then Clint and Carrie do that like annoyingly cliche thing where they just shove cake into each other's face and it's and finally Katie is like like, hey I wish shoving cake into someone's face romantic. I'd be say pissed, especially if it's my wedding day and my makeup is looking bomb.

I agree. Yeah. So then Matthew sees Lexi and he's like, listen, it's not that big of a deal, but you know what? I'm trying to be nice. And you know what? The one time I say something, the champion argument. She's like, um, I get it, but do not tell me to get out of somewhere. Okay, because I never tell you to get out of our area. Yeah. She says, I get that you don't want anyone in your dirt, which is like hilariously passive aggressive, but also rude. Um, uh, his problem is that he shouldn't have had to explain himself because he laid down the law. He drew the line and then he kind of retreated. So now she's gonna, now she knows she can push, right? So like, you should have like not worried about if he was being too mean. Even though he's

even though what he was saying was like, I mean, I would be afraid to say something like that because I'm like afraid of confrontation. But like, I feel like once you do that, you don't, you don't then like, equivocate, you know, you're just like, I'm the boss, right? Yeah, I think she's totally wrong, but here's my thing. Why is the dirt pile right there? Okay. Why is that the dirt? And you leave it right in front of the serve it, like you play all the food and you leave a dirt pile that you put there there why would you do that and it's like some why doing a drill service like yeah like all you have to do is move it a foot over why would you put all the dirt right in front of the lamb chops and then go don't step in the dirt

don't step in the dirt it's and it was it was serious move your fucking dirt pile okay and it said I need dirt pile dirt pile of tiny little guys acting like he's just like you know swept up the Sahara It's like a tiny little thumb sized quump of dirt, sir Yeah, I don't know why he was sweeping the dirt. It was the time it was a tiny amount of dirt It was not like it was truly like making a mountain out of Mulholl Like that was and it would be an apt description for this but that being said I mean Lexi is also,

she is really, like, she is, she's like, she definitely thinks that she's a guest, I feel like. So, so Matt's like, why was it an issue? Not to stand in the pile, I just swooped, she was, I don't know, I'm tired. So, you know, I offered up to clean it up. So it's, this little dirt was not a big deal.

And she's like, I can't believe how upset he is over the dirt, which admittedly, I also can't believe how upset he is, but I think it's more upset over her just being like, yeah, with that right. I'm like, you're dirt. I'll deal with you in a minute. While she's like sitting there eating his lollipops. Yeah, that was really bad. You like pop. Stepping in his dirt and eating the food without asking. So then we get bedtime.

And there's like a heart towel on the bed, which is, you know, I guess nice, because it's romantic, but it's also the best. It's also also the least effort that I've ever like make two swans kissing. I'm going to play with him about this whole thing. I think it's his Teresa's on board. And I'm like, yeah. Yeah. I'm going to play about this whole thing. I think it's because Teresa's on board. And I'm like, yeah, we need better towel.

It's amazing. So best part of a cruise is the amazing towel art. Yeah. So yeah, then David lets out a big part. And it smells like eggs. So now it's the next morning. And it's the final day of charter. And it's going to be a docking and Katie offers.

She makes like a date to have some tea with Lloyd later so he's really happy because he's gonna try to win her over with his accent. And now it's time for the first big docking and this docking drama has a little extra sizzle because we have dolphin drama, not real dolphins, just boobies that are called dolphins, which means we get a lot of, I can't see the dolphin, I can't see the dolphin. There's a dolphin coming up, I can't see the dolphin, we're close to the dolphin,

look out for the dolphin, the dolphin! Now a dolphin, that sounds delicious! You know what Florida, I forget what fish it is, but like it's called dolphin on the menu. Of course in Florida. It's better than Mahi. They literally call it dolphin. And I remember looking at the menu, being like what they sort of dolphin in Florida and it was just like another term for like tuna or something. I got to look it up.

But I was like that's bonkers. Oh Florida, just because they can, you know, just got the tourists. So yeah, so it's a bunch of dolphin dolphins are big concrete, you know, buoys out of water, which, you know, seems like a silly mistake to me to make big concrete buoys that boats have to navigate between. But you know know whatever you guys run your ocean how you run it okay so then Malia is like oh my god captain sathy not being able to see the dolphin it's worrisome it's worrisome they're

gonna hit the dolphin there's wind there's wind in the dolphin there's a lot of dolphin drama with those buoys. I got caught up in it. I'm not gonna lie. I was like, she's gonna hit the dolphin. But you know, I feel like the entire time, you just know everyone's thinking, yeah, I can't be as bad as Captain Glendo.

Poor Captain Glend, he's never gonna live down that moment. So then they did great, of course. Great job, Malia. Wow, you did great. Whoa, and you know what, Z even did a great job on the Heaving Line. Melia. Wow, you did great. Whoa. And you know what, Z even did a great job on the Heavinglines. Whoa, that is, you know what, that was me giving you a chance, giving him a chance. You know what, pay it forward. That's what I actually say.

So then we see the married guy Clint, who's now wearing his hubby hat. I didn't even notice that. I'm like mad. I'm mad that you noticed that because I never I could have I almost went through life not not knowing that you were that hat So then Everyone's like hi, five in and the captain's just glad that Matt made it through without leaving again She's like, you know what they know he's got the attitudes there. I'm not gonna jinx it I'm not gonna jinx it and then it's time for a Teresa speech. I I'm not gonna jinx it and then it's time for a Teresa speech. I Do want to let you guys know that we're in the hospitality business

We own three different TGI Franings and we're thinking about launching a new concept called Megaya. Dog, dog, dog. Megaya. Megaya. Dog, dog. Dog, dog.

Megaya, dog. It's me. Dog. And the food is what we look forward to the most. The less it's pets. Dog. Dog. Dog dot dot dot not pets. And Matt you made it happen so good for you Matt. Katie you had your girls on point because unlike Matt, you didn't kill any pets.

So she had some big water cash and the captain's like, wow, we got, we got tipped. Do they say how much it was? I didn't read it down. $25,000. Yeah. Wow. That's good, right?

That's amazing. The most prominent tip I've ever seen in my life. So they're all congratulating each other and getting ready to go out. And the captain's like, wow, Katie, you were incredible. I just wanted to say, it's so nice to have a chief Stu who's not snorting Harold and up your marijuana pen veins, okay?

Thanks. Thanks for that. Also, I just want to say that when they were getting changed for the tip meeting, Mac goes, dude, what a great first charter. I'm like, maybe for you, because you skipped the first day of it while everyone else struggled,

and they nearly, like, their entire tip was in peril because of it, maybe for you. Yeah, and he tells them, guys, you know what? You want the sofa portion of my tip. No, they just serve your whole fucking tip. You should give your whole tip, first of all. And they're just like, well, we're not going to do that. And they're like, well, you can buy a shot, so ha ha ha ha.

So it starts off nice, like a little joke. Like you can buy some shots. Yeah. So now they're going out. It's nighttime. They're getting into vans. And Matt goes, you know what, Fred? Before I came on here, I was like, I hope there's

Kiwi's on board. And I hope the stew is nice. And I got the two in one combo, huh? And she's like, it's raw, that's raw, you still want me to drink this So it was basically like me dating to a used now, right? That's how we like it, that's how we like it Shabba So then so then everyone sits down at the table and So then um so then everyone sits down at the table and um

You know the girls ask if everyone if everyone of the guys are straight and Lloyd is like They know me and two other guys did contemporary dance and school and lots of leap in and I used to get called gay for doing it But then they found out I would spent our weekends with 30 girls and we're like the jokes on you brother And then I spent the rest of my weekend standing on top of the desk in a car dealership having people throw books at me until I can smile And David gets a couple of shots in a minute. He's just like all teeth out at moly. He's a crap Moly, I looks beautiful. It's a new dynamic being attracted to someone who's my boss And then that's like hey guys, I'm gonna buy a ramp. Okay, I'm gonna buy a ramp for his case. Yeah, and then Katie's, they start giving him shit. They're like, oh, remember when we didn't get a break,

remember that, remember that. And he's like, yeah, yeah, you know, he's like, no, I get it, but I can't change what happened. And I feel bad, obviously, I feel bad. Yeah, but he's getting visibly annoyed, you know, because they won't let up. They're like, ah, that's one shot. You still owe us a day's worth of shot,

because we did your work, we deserve. Yeah, they're just basically, they're basically just like giving him the business and he thought he could do like one round and everything would be okay, but they're still giving it to him as they deserve to. And now he's can turn himself into the victim all over again Yeah, so they talk about who's dating who's right so the guys

Is this for the guys go outside so the guys are outside and the girls are talking about the guys and Lexi's like Do you know who I find attractive the girls because the guys looks wise? They're nice They're really nice. Yeah, I'm not great. And meanwhile, basically the girls are like eyeing Jake, the engineer, and Martin. But Jake has a girlfriend.

And then, and Courtney, by the way, makes a joke about dad. She starts calling Z Daddy, which I think is the funniest thing ever. I love Courtney. I think she's so funny. And I just love that she's calling. She's just like, happy birthday, daddy. So then someone asks Matt if he's like a trisexual and he goes,

no, I'm a vibe sexual. I'm like, oh, you know that you'd be one of those people that's on HBR real sex, you know, where she's like always some creepy person doing some weird... Yeah, that's never happened. You want to see fucking never. Yeah, never. Yeah. And Courtney's like, ew, he's like a creepy uncle. I mean, he really does give me creepy uncle vibes But you know like an uncle that can give you like a Thumbnail toot you know Yeah, she's like well, you know, even a crazy uncle even a creepy uncle could give you a little bit of a you know And a map by the way is like hey, I had a circle joke with me and two girls once.

I'm like, thanks for sharing, Matt, really, really. Oh God, I just blocked him out, I think, I think, yeah, I'm getting you back for saying that Clint was wearing a hat that said, hubby, now I'm getting your brain stuck with images that you don't need. Okay, so Z gives a speech about how he's so glad to be with them, if he can't be with family on his birthday

And the other calling him daddy and stuff Like happy about the dad and he loves it because he has such a crush on Courtney so every time she calls him daddy He's like totally choosing out and he's like wow you're so positive like it really would change my whole day You know it changes your whole day if you can start start you day with someone positive and like she's like Yeah, that's not me. I start the day and I'm like fuck off He's like well, uh, and I'd be like you can say fuck off in this two pantry But not the galley sort of like a call back you know and yeah He was like mad at me you guys he was mad at me

Yeah, cuz I swapped the pilot dirt and then she wouldn't move out the dirt and like she goes I'm a shh I'm like plate the pork chops like that's all I need from you right now, okay? She's laughing and he's getting so mad And she's like I'm not disrespectful unless someone is being disrespectful to me and I'm not gonna back down So Matt's like you know, it's funny because we're living and working with people we wouldn't even speak to in normal circumstances and she's like, so you wouldn't speak to me in normal circumstances, you wouldn't speak to me. She's like, that's not true. BOOSHIT! And you're not a person I'd speak to. Da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da Yeah, what does that mean? How could you say that?

Wow, so there was below tech Mediterranean everybody Yeah, yeah, and the lessons be learned don't serve to res Pat's okay guys don't serve that people least of anterpups started this on Bravo and Teres is just carrying that flame Okay, she's carrying it. Taking it. Taking it all the way All right everybody. Thank you so much for being here. We will be back tomorrow with a little real high as well as a Beavilyls and we'll talk later. Okay, or New York tomorrow. New York tomorrow. Oh, yeah, New York then Beverly Hills Talk later, okay? Or New York tomorrow, New York tomorrow. Oh yeah, New York then Beverly Hills.

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