Watch What Crappens - Below Deck Sailing Yacht: The Throuple of Helleville

Episode Date: July 11, 2023

*Also avail as video on Crappens On Demand http://bit.ly/crappensvideo* Below Deck Sailing Yacht treats us to a vile, garbage packed throuple for our last charter and we couldn't be more grossed out. Can one man's statement necklaces and Blanche Devareaux caftans save this mess? Probably not, but we're not gonna barf in the sink about it. This week's bonus is a Train Snaps episode from Boston and you can find all bonuses and videos by joining Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

I've been watching you cryin' Watch what you cryin' Kids, what happens when they're so Why, if that man's so froncious You cryin' Watch what you cryin' Kids, what happens when they're so much That's that man's

Wow, hello and welcome to WaterwhatCRAPANCE The podcast for all that crap we love to talk about! On ye, oh, props! Hi, everybody, I'm Ronnie. Please welcome the gorgeous and talented Ben to the show. Ben? Hi, how's it going? Pretty good.

Um, you know, this is a very rough below deck episode. Okay. Yeah. A very upsetting gay episode of below deck, you know? Yeah. And I feel like last episode of below deck sailing, they weren't, they like threatened us with some bad gays, and then they turned out to be lovely gays. And then they were like, that was just your own way. The threat was really this week. Yes, we saw good gaze.

Now we see evil gaze. It's a good reminder that gaze are not monoliths. Yeah, we come in all shapes and sizes and turbulence. There's bad of everything. Okay. And there's your, you got your peanut M&Ms, which are your good gaze. And then you've got your,

um, coaching coffee M&Ms. Okay. but you're your good gaze. And then you've got your co-op in that coffee, M&Ms, okay? That nobody understands. Nobody really gets why you're doing this M&Ms, but you can cut the shit now. Okay, those kind of gaze. And that's the kind of gaze we get today, okay? I'm gonna tell you this. Get a good job because if you have a good job,

you can get any sort of shit you want. I mean, that little guy really had to hop boyfriend. I mean, brought himself a nice hop boyfriend for his thropple. I mean, it's a lot been continue with the intro. I didn't even enjoy this show. Yeah. Well, no, we're going to be talking simple, dexaling today.

Our this is Bravo put on two episodes on Monday night. So this is the first of the two episodes. The second one is the finale. I guess it's all to gear up for the Bravo premiere of Blow Deck Down Under next week. So I guess maybe that's why they rush it. Maybe they want it to debut this next week's Blow Deck along with Roni.

It's like a premiere week next week. So anyway, yeah, we had this episode, which by the way, I just wanna piggyback off something you're saying, which is that a lot of people reminded us that the gays from the last charter, they have been on below deck before. There was, I think it was last season or a season before regular below deck.

There was a similar preference sheet situation where Chef Rachel saw, and was like, fuck this! And walked where Chef Rachel saw and was like, fuck this! And walked off the boat and was like, I'm not doing this. And I was like, I remember that moment. I remember that those people turned out to be perfectly lovely and fine. And I was even gonna mention that on the podcast. But apparently it's actually made, it's like the same actual charter guests. I'm not sure, but so if any of this seems familiar from last time, that's why.

So we had a lot of people message us about that. Before we dive into that though, come join us on patreon.com.sachewatchworkrapins. You get early access to all our videos because we are doing crap is on demand. And if you support on the crap is on demand level, you get access to early access to our videos. You can see us right now recording before they go onto YouTube a week later. And you also get access to early access to our videos. You can see us right now recording

before they go onto YouTube a week later. And you also get access to things like our weekly bonus episode. This week's bonus episode, we are going to be partaking in Amazon Prime Day and we are going to be scouring for great deals and we're gonna record the entire experience as one of our favorite things to do.

I personally am in the market for a butterkeeper and hopefully I can find one that I like. So keep it in your mouth for that. Huge things coming. Okay, dudes. Yeah, here we go. Let's get into it. Okay. So we ended the last one with this completely bonkers and cringey and discussed the moment of Gary coming up to Mads and being like, is it that time of the month for you? You just just out of interest and she's like, why? He's like, because I think you could have the common decency to tell me not to go down on the U of U world your time and the month.

Oh my god. It's just like so inappropriate, so deeply inappropriate. Like, and such a deep like HR violation. And he's like, well, I've got to speak in such a deep like H.R. violation. And he's like, well, I've got to speak to Alex because I think that's pretty gross. We're in this business. And then he tells us, he goes, I'm mad at Alex. I mean, how does he find out that she's on a period

when I'm the one licking her vagina? I was like, you are terrible. I mean, he gets even worse. I mean, like within the same minute, he gets worse, you know, it's like next week, Gary even goes lower. Here's like, I think I have a right to new and she's like, I think in freaking no, which finally, thank you because people have mocked me all week for not, both of us really, for not knowing how periods work and all of that stuff, but that was my

one question that nobody answered this entire two weeks that we've been gone from the show, which was, wouldn't you fucking know? I mean, I haven't really been down there, but wouldn't you know? Nobody answered me, finally mad, answered me out of her own mouth, which is, wouldn't you fucking know? And so Gary was like, oh, was Alex getting freaky with her to find out you know just how how would he know? Well gee god forbid you've never heard somebody say oh my god. I'm on my period. Uh-oh my period's about to start It's amazing. I mean from people. I'm a period Yeah, it's amazing what you can learn from people by just ask them questions like how's it going? What's going on with your life right now, you know, instead of just like trying to endlessly flirt with them and be like, where do you do like me? Do you not like me?

Blah, blah, blah. So, um, yeah, so Alex is like God, Colin and Gary are the largest gospel conversations I have with people. When I'm like, Hey, how's it going? You on your period today? What's that been? This was something you were really saying. Like, yeah, you know, just ask people about themselves. How are you? Has your period? It's around now, right? We're friends. Well, but you know, if you just talk to people, you might find that information naturally. I'm just teasing.

Ron, are you on your period? Always. Mentally always. So Alex says basically saying how Gary and Connor, the biggest gossip queens in history, is like, I literally can't tell them anything. And he's like, yeah, I mean like, like, professional Gary. Well, now that is accurate. Won't be a secret for more than five minutes at professional gear.

And look, why does Chase get, why is Chase now a full-fledged cartoon character? Like, he can't just even say his sentence without panamining the whole sentence. Have you noticed that in his talking? Yes. By the end, he's just acting out the whole thing, you know? He's just acting like a big brother

contested in the confessional. He's like, so what I have to do in this competition is hold on to the rope, not so easy even for someone. I'm, you know what? This competition's so hard, I'm out at sea. So then Gary and Colin are in the wheelhouse and Gary's like, I hate this now it look like immediate. And Colin's like, what's going on?

Well, clearly, I just had to ask a brew. I feel like a puss brew. He's like, what? Why do you feel like a puss? Because not even all their periods, brew, I got mad about the periods. He's not even on. That's why you feel like an ass.

God, you're so fucking helpless, dude. And this is the perfect thing is happening, Segary. And I'm actually loving watching it unfroke. Because it's what we called his first season. We're like this is this guy's you know Carol from Real House Wise in New York her first some her first season she said These are a lesson. I'm in my 50s. I've got five good summers left and we still make fun of that Because like what a ridiculous thing to say like you're just a carton of milk just waiting to rot but ridiculous thing to say, like you're just a carton of milk, just waiting to rot. But, and Gary's first season, I was like,

this is that guy who's just right at that age where his hotness is about to turn. Like he's about to turn it, he's milk that's about to turn into cheese, and he's about to start learning really quick that the tables turn, you know? And nobody wants your ranted ass. And I'm loving watching all of his charm,

just completely wash away. And you know what, he doesn't even come to his hair. He doesn't even make any effort because he does not know it's going away, you know? Yeah, he is clinging on to something that is fleeting away from him. So then Con, I go, why would Alex say that about the period,

if it wasn't true, and he goes, oh, because he's going to be in trouble. And then Collins, I go, I was like, well, how would that even come up in conversation, like they're shocked. So the Mads goes, me, elsewhere, Mads, like, oh, I think I realize why Alex said that, because he was laying on me last night.

And we see the flashback of the previous episode when Alex like sits on her or something, and she's like, stop, I'm bloated, I'm on my period. And he goes, oh, and she goes, just kidding. Which was really, I guess Alex didn't hear the just kidding part. I think actually none of us heard the just kidding part. No, we heard it.

It's just you don't know if she really is or not. Mads is just one of those people that talks like that. Like, I have a friend who's like, it's she'll say, yeah, no. She says that a lot. So you're like, yes or no though. You'll be like, so how was work today? She'll go, yeah, no, no, no, I don't fucking know.

Will you tell me what you're saying? Yeah, but I mean, like, you know, like, I mean, just kidding, but like, you know, not really. Yeah. Like, where you say, no, you know, like, I mean, just kidding, but like, you know, not really. Yeah. Like, what do you say? Yeah, no. Mad talks like that. But first of all, that conversation was even grosser

because Alex was like, you're bloated. He's like, oh, yeah, because I'm on my period, just kidding. So who knows? Who knows? Exactly. Yeah, no. I don't know how much time on it. Yeah, no.

Yeah, no. I saw like a meme, some stupid meme, that was like, isn't it funny? And I was like, yeah, no means no, but no, yeah, means yeah. So that's what I think of that meme. So Gary is like, well, I won't even be able to show my face anymore. And then it's like time for provisions. So that means they're firing up the Southern charm music against like, it's so weird.

It's like all those times on southern charm we've seen people bringing groceries, which is like never. Like why is it consistent on the provisions part? It's like, uh-oh, shrimp delivery. Bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap,

bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom. And then I guess one of the things that was requested were where Reese's Puffs cereal and Chase goes, oh Reese's Puffs, and Daisy's Daisy just goes, for the gas, for the gas, don't even fucking touch up. I just like that she's for two. This is for like the young thrupple member, the boyfriend, of course. Yeah, this for NICE.

Go and go to Parsnip was. We'll get to him. That threat. So the guests are arriving by tender at one o'clock, captain Sandy moved on one park. So they start getting fired up and Gary and Mads are in the mess and cares like, I'm soon. Bearist. I didn't even want to show my face to you because I was soon. Bearist so embarrassed. I didn't even want to show my face to you because I was so embarrassed for asking you that. I couldn't believe I asked you that. She's like, sir, that's not an apology.

One more charter, one more charter, and I'm done with all of that. Can't wait to hook up with them again. Like you're really getting difficult for me to root for, Mads. I mean, come on, Jesus Christ. It's like someone in two leg casts that just keeps running into traffic. You're like, it's just you not see. It's exactly like that.

Have you learned your lesson? I get off on it, run me over, bro. So Alex and Colin are talking outside and Alex is like, I get off on it, run me over, bro. So Alex and Colin are talking outside and Alex is like, yo, Colin, thanks for making the math period thing an issue, dude, Jesus Christ. But like I forgive you and Colin is like, I didn't do anything wrong. Yes, you fucking did, you little gossip.

Got the crap. And you're all you're doing is pushing Gary to go crazy so he won't focus on you. It's not gonna work, sir. Yeah. And so then, Matt's like, I'm over everyone this morning. So she tells Daisy and Daisy's like,

I, I mean, shulk. Now, I kind of felt like what I wanted here from Daisy was, he is not allowed to ask questions like that of my stews, and I'm gonna talk to him right now and tell him that that was totally inappropriate. But instead she's just like, I mean, to go to Hensys, like she doesn't really do anything about it,

and I thought that was like she a big failure on Daisy's part. I do too, but I also think that the lines are just so blurred on this show specifically. Below deck is always bad with matters of HR, always. Especially with male, showvinism and sexual harassment at the very least, okay. But this one really crosses the line because Gary's ahead of department constantly fucking the people lower in the hierarchy. So it's really hard to see. Like there's no there are no lines drawn on this show. So I don't know how you suddenly start

drawing lines, but it would have been nice to see you try, you know, you don't make a perfect line your first time, but you know, practice makes perfect start, baby steps, baby, baby draws, you know. So um, so then Alex is telling Colin, he's kind of breaking the column that if you had just put in any sort of effort, he would have totally had mads. And Colin's like, you reckon it's game on, and he's like, maybe.

So then meanwhile, Gary's, I just don't cut his lunch then. Colin, you're literally a sandwich knife right now. What are you talking about cutting his lunch? You're cutting his lunch. Stop accusing everybody else of cutting lunch. You're just like a lunch lady fight over there. Stop it.

So Gary, meanwhile, here's a retaliation. He's gonna put Alex on the leaps so he doesn't have to look at him. And he's like, I'm very happy not seeing Alex all the fucking day. And like, you can concentrate on his dramas. I didn't like watch. Blah blah blah. So then, which is like, stupid because he shouldn't be on the night watch

because he's also really bad at night watch, by the way. So meanwhile, the suits are trying to figure out where the throttle will go downstairs. And Dave, he's trying to explain the throttle to Lucy and Lucy seems very confused by the entire concept. Yeah. She's like, but where are they gonna sleep then? The twin cabins.

But they're all couples then. No, apparently they're married, couple and they've got a boyfriend. The twin cabins. But they're all couples then. No apparently they're married a couple and they've got a boyfriend. She's like so basically they get bored of each other then. Oh god. Like we see. If one member of the Threpple Falls out at bed at night or that stays it's either still a threpple. So wait if you tell me they've got one window that comes up between each of them. So the bed has to fit three glass windows in there for them not to fall out of the bed, man. That's not how it works.

So now Chase tells Alex that Gary's pissed at him. So Alex's like, what? So he goes up to Gary and he's like, yo, are we square? Are we good? And Gary's like, oh, you're talking to me. Well, no, I don't know why the fuck you want to go to his drama. I'm like, you are the one who walked up to a lady on the boat and said, are you on your period?

Because I don't understand why you're on your period and not telling me because I'm liking your vagina. Like, you are the one who caused the drama. And Colin is also the one who ran the challenge. But to Colin, Gary. Now Alex is the one for causing drama for even saying it in the first place to call in who he knows is just gonna run to Gary to say something. You know, they're all fucking drama queens.

So Alex is like, what did I do, bro? And Gary is like, what do you say to Colin? Like that time of the month thing to get the reaction out of me. I was like, none of that was said to you. And Gary was, oh, but then I have to go, I said, oh, and I look like a fucking idiot. You know what I asked, I'm like, well, you know what, if you were really concerned that about the situation, you didn't have to like,

chase her down when she was sitting there on a staircase in front of someone else and say all this stuff. It was really, really concerning to you. If you were concerned about your health, that you may have like, I guess, you know, like, like, like, like, turbo-lod, then you, like, maybe pull her, like, if ever at all, you pull her aside and ask her privately where she can't be, like,

potentially humiliated on camera. You know what should concern you? Sun damage. Okay. Get on that. So he's like, yeah, and I had to go ask her because I look like an idiot. I like the Alex's. Like, uh, actually, no, you didn't have to go ask her. He's like, what, why would she tell you that then? Because I went to ask him, she said no. And he goes, dude, I didn't do any of this. Are you, are you hearing yourself?

Like, I didn't come to you with this. What, why are you blaming me? And he tells us that was an incredibly disrespectful and immature way to deal with this. Like, even thinking about it, I can only come three times in a row. It's sad. He goes, I said, you look bloated and she said,

yeah, it's because of my period. And like, that's all the conversation that happened. And like, there was nothing about you to try to start drama. And he was like, blah, blah, blah. And he was like, storms away, like, shut up. So I mean, like, is Gary upset that, I've seen him almost like, Gary is more upset that like, Alex knew. So I mean, like, is Gary upset that,

I've seems almost like Gary is more upset that like Alex knew something that he didn't, which is also ridiculous. I'm just getting that he's mad that he thinks Alex purposely spread it around that Mads was on her period to make Gary mad so he would look stupid by confronting Mads. Like babe, Alex can barely mop.

You know what I mean? Like he's not thinking that far ahead. God bless him. He's gorgeous, seems very nice, but Alex is not gonna be like, he's not a chest kind of a person. You know? No, no.

So Alex like this just shows Gary's leadership style, dysfunctional as fuck, it's toxic as fuck, it's like a mess. So the anchors go down, naughty boy's go out, the toys go out and everything, and because the gays are gonna come via water taxi or via tender because as soon as they arrive, they wanna get right into the water toys, so all that stuff is happening. Lucy Smiths are armpits and I get really jealous of her because she goes, I smell like chicken nuggets.

I would love that kind of a smell. I've always liked that. If there was a genie that came out, I don't know if it would be chicken nuggets, but like fresh french fries, you know, or like fresh cookies. I wish that's what my smell tasted like or fresh. Fresh cookies now. Could you imagine? Mmm.

It's okay. It's so popular. So Daisy and Colin are in the engine room flirting, you know, and she's like hanging on him from the back. It's like, I hope you don't talk about anything. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I hope you don't talk about anything about me to the guys. And he's like, I don't.

Why? I'm actually in shock over a really inappropriate thing that we said to Mads. And I don't know why you would say that. So fucking crudely disrespectfully. It's super fucked up. And I'm going to talk about it in every scene and not ever say a thing to him about it. Yeah, seriously, and can't go, well don't worry, I'll have been told. They haven't asked me anything, I haven't told them anything about us. So now the Gary and Chase go on a tender to get the guests.

And now we got our first glimpse of the gaze. So first we have Grant and Todd, who are like the primaries and Grant is like, he is he's wearing a shirt and it's like just fully open. And he has of course, like, worked out and everything. So he has his torso is out there, but he is put on an enormous statement necklace hanging from his neck with his open shirt. And he's definitely like, he's coming on with a look. A dude. Yeah, this is definitely a Countess Louie on fan. Yes.

And he's like, okay, let's find our hot Dakond. And Chase is like, oh my God, it's like a fitness convention. I'm a dick, my big dick. Okay. Also, a lot of comments on Chase's big weiner. That weiner didn't look right. So I'm not really sure if it was safe. If he was stuffing, the winner doesn't start where it was starting and it doesn't end

where it was ending. None of it made any sense. No one's penis starts all the way to the right of their pelvic bone. You know what I mean? You know what? There's only one way to settle this. Only one way to settle this. We're going to need a full nude chase.

I'm sorry. You're just going to way to settle this. Only one way to settle this. We're gonna need a full nude chase. I'm sorry, you're just gonna have to do that. So I thought it was, by the way, this guy shows up. And when he says, like, let's find a hot deck hand and then we see the throttle behind them. They don't get names, they're just called the throttle. And then it just says the throttle. And then that's when Chase goes, wow, it's like a fitness convention.

And then Grant, the guy with the open shirt, grabs, like he grabs both of like, he grabs like Gary and Chase's shirts. And he tugs at them and he's like, you guys shirts will be off next. I'm like, just everyone on this show, everyone is just like just totally inappropriate at all times, I guess.

Yes. It's time for commercial, it's time for a crapence commercial. So then Lucy and Lucy, this is off me saying, well Chase, you gotta send us a new pick. No, no. Well listen, we're meant to, you know, we're still pigs. I could think of the day. We can say whatever we want, but at the end of the day, we're still men. And we have to suffer the consequences.

So, so Lucy is still confused. She's like, so wait, the screw in each other then. Matt is like, oh, or do you think like they take turns with a boyfriend? Well, I couldn't do it. Happy luck, get the fuck off my husband then. Yeah, it doesn't make sense. Like, why would you get married and then,

then you got a boyfriend? I don't understand. What don't you fucking understand? First of all, man, you're basically with a petri dish who's been with literally every person who's ever walked within six feet of him. Yes, okay. You know better than me think, well, what it's like. And you're already in kind of a. Yes. Okay. You know better than any one, what it's like.

And you're already in kind of a throttle on this boat. If you're already this comfortable in this like quasi-thruple that you're in, you'll be fine in the future. I think you'll understand these guys much, much sooner than you think. Yeah, exactly. So now we get some names on the throttle. There's Nick, who's the boyfriend,

and then there's Randy and Brad, or Husband. And Brad is like a little pocket gay. And as soon as you see him, you can already tell what the dynamic of this relationship is. Brad has the money, right? Brad is the one paying the bills, right? And then Nick is the hot young one, who they need to bring in,

because Randy was once the hot young one who like they need to bring in because Randy was once the hot one and now Randy is now just like leaching off of Brad. And so now like Brad is dissatisfied with traps so he has to bring in Nick. So like right off the bat you can just sort of tell this is what the dynamic is and that's exactly what it is. That's exactly what the dynamic is as it as it reveals itself over the course of the episode. Randy is a vile. He is a fucking vile. He is disgusting.

Oh my God. So, I know it's like, you can just tell what Randy's entire backstory is too. That's the best part. I feel like Randy is basically, I feel like he comes from like a conservative family in Pennsylvania who,

and they talk about Christmas a lot like oh did you hear Mother grandma Beth her favorite ornament. We lost it. Oh really? We lost grandma Beth's ornament. Oh found it found it Okay, thank God. It's oh thank God. It's still October. We have plenty of time to find it It's not my business. I'm laughing I don't know why I'm doing that talk. Yeah. This is an accent. He's terrible. So then we...

He's obsessed with grandma Beth. And there are Christmas plans. Oh, I really wanted his mother to be on board, but it's not his mother. It's Todd's mother. So there's a nice couple. There's Todd and Grant. They're the nice couple. I mean, Grant was the kind of sexual harassy one at the beginning with the statement necklace,

but they turned out to be lovely, right? Right. The throttle is horrible, right? The throttle is horrible. Todd's mother is Deborah, and she's a mother of one of the nice ones. So the captain welcomes them, and she's like, and a capitan!

And I was like, okay, you know, I'll forgive for that. But then they go on the tour and Todd's like, so what do you think, mom? And she goes, every mother deserves a gay son. I was like, oh my God, I would never take this woman anywhere. This woman's gonna be terrible. She's terrible, right?

Did you hate that, bro? I liked that, bro, actually. At first I thought she was gonna be terrible, but I actually liked her. You know, especially because when you have Randy there, everyone just sort of seems perfectly fine, right? Like, Randy made a great sense to me. Yeah, until Randy acted up,

I really hated Debra. And then I was like, hmm, at least, well, we'll get to it. I don't want to. Just giving spoilers. So the, the Thrupal gets the Master's Suite because that way they all fit as they say. And they're walking around. And of course, Randy is like, what's the thread count for these sheets? Because of course, it's going to be the guest. You know, it's never the, it's always,

we always say it's never the primaries. It's always like the guests of the primaries. And in this case, it's the guest who's also the husband to the Sugar Daddy guy here. So of course, he's complaining about the thread sheets, thread counts. So then Gary sees Mads in the kitchen, she's unpacking groceries and he's like, ooh, I'm double toe. And she just ignores somebody's like, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, so then Lucy is talking to the guys and she's like,

are you guys late night? He's like, we're sun risers, not late nighters. So what's that then? Is that somewhere sexual kind of thing? He's like, no, no, it's just a, just a play on, is it just a different take on thing? Up on that, it's all the sunrise. Oh, I see.

Also, Grant says the things that says the phrase, one of the phrases I really never like to hear which is we brought our own circuit music. I was like no. Circuit music is the worst. I'm wonderful. I don't know which one it is because we have a few things to press. Is that okay?

I'm like sure. Okay. We left it on the bed. And then that's all we hear for that. So then water toys and then we see mads go into the room and find the pile of stuff to press and it's bigger than mads. It is enormous.

It is like, it looks like she's robbing a dry cleaner. She has just like, like, stacks and stacks and stacks. So she really does look like an egg carrying a watermelon, you know, so it looks crazy. How is it that these guys who wear virtually nothing this entire trip have so much stuff that has to be pressed? Because that fucking grant, the statement necklace is like blanche Dubois.

Is that, is it blanche Dubois is Tennessee Williams or is that called? Yes, more girls blanche. More both. Blanche Devorow. Okay, he girl's blanche? We're both. Oh, that was never a row. Okay, he dresses like blanche devorote. He's like a speedo, but then he always has like a blanche devorote robe.

Yes, yeah, he's definitely into golden girls fashion. So then Lucy turns the day, she goes, this is gonna be a bad one. And she goes, yeah, it's gonna be a bad one. So meanwhile downstairs during the water sports, so Debra's on this float. She's trying to get on. She's trying to get on.

You know, corn float, right? And that is like, it's tied to the naughty boy. So it doesn't float away. So Alex takes her phone so it doesn't fall in the water. And he goes into sort of like the little garage, the garage to go stow it away so it'll be safe. And while he's doing that, Randy unties Debra from the naughty boy. And he's like, there you go.

He's like, go have fun, whatever. He's just like unties her. And she's like, I think you need to cut me loose, and then you need to come rescue me. So they do, they cut her loose, and then she just starts floating away. She just floats away, She's like, ah, Alex has to hop on a seat.

He has to get a sea bob and he has to go and like a rescue around the sea bob. And Daisy goes up to Randi goes, did you untie her? He's like, yeah, I'm trying to help, trying to help Todd get his inheritance sooner. I mean, she's 72. There's not much left. So then Alex has to tow her back and then tips her over again. So funny. So then after the after the toy is Colin and Chase are in bed and Colin's like, so you hear about this whole Gary and Chase debacle, the whole period, I think I fucking call in, my God, he's such a little goss. And then Chase is like, it's so dumb, dude.

Oh, sorry, I pushed my mic. Gary asked me this morning, he's like, do you wanna be on the day shift? Cause like, he didn't wanna have to see Alex. Yeah, and Colin's like, he's gonna put not Alex on night to punish him, is that what's happening he's gonna put not Alex on nights to to punish him Is that what's happening and Chase goes yeah because he didn't want to see him you know and so Chase is like

I'm sure Gary feels really embarrassed, but I don't feel bad for the guy the immature way he deals with conflict is exactly What got him into this mess and you can't let it consume your work life like the way Gary does. And he's like, yeah, I mean, I don't know if I'd ever hook up with a girl after she hooked up with Gary. Colin's like, on doing it. Chase goes, yeah, I don't know man,

I think he should probably go see a doctor. Right. So then Randy orders a double martini, which, what the fuck is that? What's the rush? What's a double martini, which... What the fuck is that? What's the rush? What's a double martini? And listen, I'm a martini queen. You know, I love a martini.

But like, what is the rush? There's no closing artini. What the fuck are you doing? Why don't you just order heroin? Just order heroin already. You fucking addict, my god. So, and he's just like staring at her, like pouring the drink.

Cause I just like, without look, like, oh,'s just like staring at her, like pouring the drink. It's just like, with that look, like, oh, grandma, that's not here to pass judge mommy now. So, he's just doing that and like, he's getting another shot and day's he's like, these guests are drinking like what? Like what her is running out of the ocean. Okay, I just want nice normal guests for once. So, it's just like more booze, more shots,

more Randy getting wasted. And Randy burps and then he stops. He'd like burps and almost barfs, but then stops himself and looks up the stairs and he's like, I can do this. Yeah. So then there's like some, oh an awkward moment in the crew mess because like Gary's sitting at the table and Alex is sitting next to him and Mads walks up because scooch and then Alex steps up. So she can take a spot because I said scooch, I met moving and then Gary's like, but I can't scooch in. And she's like, oh, sorry. And so concludes scooch theater. Mad refuses to scooch with Gary. Don't, don't, don't. So then Daisy delivers shots and Randy goes,

well, you took forever. And the little guy is like, honey, she's busy. He's like doing what? That's his wizard job. I was like, fucking die. Just throw him off the boat. Why aren't you ending it like this? Why is this?

Okay, you know what, it's not gay pride anymore. I guess that's why. I guess that's what Bravo did. You know, they were like, it's gay pride. Here's some good gays. Gay pride's over. And here's how we're givin'. Here's how we're.

You have the bad ones. You're the bad ones. I hate this guy. He's so terrible. He's not because he's gay, because he's just a vile fucking human being. He is. And his eyebrows are sort of like, he's such a dick that like his eyebrows have actually been like are like now formed into asshole. Like you know when you're making like a, you're an Nintendo

me or something like that or an avatar in a video game and you can do all sorts of funky things with your eyebrows and like, you know, one thing is like a super angry eyebrow, but no one ever does that. But his eyebrows, because he's so angry all the time, are naturally in that state where they like, they're, they go up on the outside and like, in down on the inside. He's just, I think, came of age where that was the eyebrow thing. Listen, I'm still in eyebrow regrowth mode and I'm old and I'm still trying to get those back. He looks like he just never got out of that stage where it was the plucking of the high

arch that we were doing back then. He's just angry, angry lady. So the cheers quares and so Daisy goes downstairs after this guy is like, she's like, for hours, she has a staff, she can hurry up. She's like, they're psychopaths. So now Randy has wasted and he's like talking to Todd. He's the primary and he's like,

you know what, you've always been sincere though. And then he just like, as he's talking, he has his glasses, that's the loose-yle-bluth. Whereas he's talking, he just sloshes half his drink out of his glass onto the table. And I was like, um, Rande, you just spilled half a drink on me. Yeah. And someone's like, um, do you need some more olive juice? And he's like, hey, it's a little, uh-huh. Wants off. So, um, R Randy goes down and crashes on his bed. And now it's time to sail, which I love that the captain is just like, fuck that guy.

Let's just bang him all around. Let's roll him off the bed. And then of course, Lucy Burns herself on the iron, because it's Lucy, you know. So it is selling time. And then the statement necklace gay just goes, yo. Yeah. So, so Todd and Grant Grant statement necklace gay, they're lying on the deck. They're watching the sailing. They're excited for this. But meanwhile, the thruple is downstairs in their room fighting because Randy's passed out and they went to tent him

So Nick is there and he's Nick is the young boyfriend like the hot young boyfriend and he's like, hey, I got you water It really goes fuck you Fuck you get off of me because I'm trying to help you from falling and breaking your damn neck I mean goes, oh yeah, whatever. He's g bed, Randy, right now. Let's leave him alone. Second. Hearts, fucking rental. Get the fuck outta here. In a minute.

So, yeah, Nick is like, Randy, get back in bed. Get back in bed. I'm ready to say, please leave me alone. Right now, leave me alone. So then, Grant and Todd are cuddling on the deck and they start getting frisky and grants like, oh my god, get out of here. The captain is right there looking at us. I know it's kind of hot. Let's do it like right in front of the captain. Sobba, let's go to our room. Come on. Let's go to our room.

Which by the way, there's probably the one captain who wouldn't mind. You know, we've learned a lot about that this captain the season. Listen, I've been on this, I spent eight years in his boat with Sierra and then the other guy. I watch them have sex everywhere, so this is like nothing. Yeah. Page it. Page it in Sierra.

Yeah. But it'd been funnier if I remembered his name before he's here attacking. So that was fun five minutes of sailing. Now they're putting the sailing things away, the sails, and Alex and Matt are talking and he's like, wow, I wish I had style. She goes, I like your style. It's like a simple and clean and hot. Oh, stop it.

You get me a fired up. Yeah, that's so hot, that like ironing room certification. Yeah. So then, so now there's like, and then it's like a moment of awkwardness between Alex and Gary where they like talk, but then there's a lot of silence afterwards because Gary's still mad at Alex. And meanwhile, Randy is still fighting in his room.

And he says, you leave me on the goddamn floor, pass the fuck out and you couldn't even put me on the fucking bed. You can apologize, I'm pissed. And it's like, oh, okay, pal, I'm sorry that you got so drunk that I tried to take care of you. Sorry, we're out. I know I'm sorry that you left me on the fucking floor, Nick.

Wait, we have to imagine, did Randy roll off the bed? Is that what happened? Like why? Cause he saw him pass on, he knew he was on the bed. And he ran up on the floor. Because Nick came in to help him and then he told Nick to leave him alone, so Nick left him alone.

And he got flung off the bed cause they were sailing. And I just only hope that this is what really happened. Yeah, and yeah, because he woke up on the floor passed out. So it's like, what do you want the guy to do? You made him leave, you know? So, so he's like, yeah, let me on the fucking floor and go, well, I couldn't wake you. I couldn't do shit. And Brad's like, he's allowed to have his own life when you're twung.

Okay, no, no, you're a guest of fucking mind. That's what Randy's saying. And he's a guest of ours, it is a guest of our- Fuck you, fuck you. I would have taken care of him. Nick's like, I did. I was holding you. And you were flopping around the whole room.

Flopping around the room. I'm mad. He's sitting outside the door with all this press stuff and they're just listening to this and Randy's like, you weren't, don't you want to even win me? He's like, yeah, because you were fighting me, so I left. No, yeah, Brad's a witness and there's fucking still water on the ceiling. You're like, what? Brad'm Brad, Brad's the little one, he goes, you threw a whole glass at him. Because, so go fuck yourself for throwing a glass

of water at me and getting it on the ceiling. Lucy's listening, I'm like, what are they arguing about? They have a whole boyfriend over there. You got two more friends, why are you all going to bat? No, so they give the press close to Grant and they're just listening to this fighting and Lucy's like, if this is an example of being in a trouble, gave me the fuck away from that on.

So wait, can we just like recap? So as far as we can tell, Randy got wasted, passed out on the bed. They went sailing. Randy flopped off the bed because he was passed out. He wound up on the floor and he got really mad that he felt like people just let him on the bed. They went sailing. Randy flopped off the bed because he was passed out. He wound up on the floor and he got really mad that he felt like people just let him on the floor. So then when Nick came to help him out, Randy threw a glass of water at him, right? He told him to leave and I think Nick wouldn't leave. And so he threw the glass of water at the ceiling and then they finally just left him. So then he flopped all over

the room and ended up waking up on the floor. That's why they were saying there's still water on the ceiling. Like, you can still see it up there from the last time you fucking threw it. Well, my theory is that he didn't throw the glass of water at the ceiling, but the water got on the ceiling via the throw. And the only way that you can get water on the ceiling is that normally when people throw water, it's like that, it's an underhanded thrust like this. But if you throw the water like this,

if you throw it overhand, you know, then the water's gonna cascade out of the glass and hit the ceiling. So that means Randy threw the glass like, ah, like a real angry swish at it, which is just like a funny imagery. Like I just really wish we had cameras for this moment. So Lucy is in the mess telling Daisy in the captain everything going on.

And then they're fat and that one of them's supposed to be a boss friend but there's two of them, but then there's a third one. I'm not really sure what we're supposed to call a thruple. Well then they got an effect because there's one of them, but it's not one of those spins. It's one of the other ones. It's a thruple. But then they started yelling at each other. Thruple. So, Glenn's like, was there anyone getting eggro?

Okay, because you know what? Like, if someone gets egggro, let me know immediately. Immediately if anyone gets aggro. So we're just saying aggro a lot. He's like, can I take any aggro's? So then the master cap in, I'd like to take just cute cutting to the master cap and it goes master cabin. The thruffle.

The thruffle. Every single time it goes master cabin. The Thrupple. Every single time goes Master Cabin. The Thrupple. So Randy is, I'm miserable. Oh, I'm gonna throw up. So now we're approaching dinner now. So now at the gaze we're heading to dinner. And Brad is like, if you get mad and make a public scene,

then what happens? And Randy's like, I don't give a shit. Because this is still behind closed doors. And Brad's like, baby, it's not worth it. It's not worth it. So now Brad is like pleading with Randy. So we're getting more of like their paradigmic, which is that like Randy goes off the,

like goes crazy. And Brad is like powerless to do anything about it. It's not worth it, baby. He goes, oh, it is. He goes, please, baby, please. So Randy storms into the hallways, like she's like stumbling. And Lucy, Lucy's been listening this whole time, but she pretends to be picking something up like off the corner of the wall. She's like, oh, she like flanzers up against

the ball. So like, can't even say me, I'm here so funny. This guy is so so wasted. He's like, I'm gonna tell somebody that I know who or why but they're gonna get it It's time for commercial. It's time for a crap and commercial So now it's the dinner table and the grant and his boyfriend and the mom are there and Grant in another statement necklace and Debra goes so you guys call them the truffle? Stop what you're calling them? Todd's like, mother, it's the truffle. And she goes, well, it makes no sense whatsoever.

And so Randy gets to ride the table and goes, and so it begins. And so then Nick joins, and Nick and Brad are walking to the table, but they're like basically debating who has to sit next to Randy. Nick's like, well he's down already, so you're gonna have to sit first, please.

I can't sit next to him. And Alicia's here. Alicia still works for him. Yeah, she is here. Yeah, so she's like, I don't fucking guess it's not ideal but I've put a lot of work into this and you're gonna enjoy this

whether you like it or not. I'm gonna serve you nice, dishful of positivity and no drama. I was like, get out. You're fired again. I know. Collins, like, Shiflashia did it better. So, uh, Deborah's like, so, hey everyone,

did everyone see my unicorn ride today? And then the guys are like joking that they missed it. And they're like, well, Randy on tide or in letter loose, and really goes because she wanted it. It's terrible. So, Alicia serves avocado mousse with caviar and toasted bread. And then Nick, the boy friend. The boy friend.

The boy friend. The boy friend. That's so funny because I like, can't spell caviar, but I lived to you that Okay, I don't mean to be I mean you're in the 40s. It's not a lead-ass Yeah, caviar's not a hard word. I'm sorry. It's like not a hard word six letters Like the ditsy blonde been both thing like I'm sure worked for you for obviously is still working for you I mean you're on a paid cruise, but you know, at some point you have to just drop that. Yeah, you can't be you can't be on TV bragging about how you don't know how to spell

caviar as you read it. No, it's not a bad book. It's not good. Yeah, good. It's not as cute fucking stupid people when they're old. Yeah, yeah, it's also not cute to be proudly stupid, you know, like if you're young, it's like, oh my god, it's like a cute, it's also not cute to be proud of these stupid, you know, like if you're young, it's like, oh my god, it's like a cute, it's like naive when you're old, it's just stupid. Yeah, yeah, it's just bad. It's bad. Like this is a permanent record of your stupidity. Like, don't mean into it. But it's also a permanent record of you being with these two. So I don't really know how you're ever going to recover from. Make this one work because literally nobody else is good.

Your stock price just went way down hurts. They're gonna have a very stupid murder mystery at some point. Like at some point, Randy's gonna die. And it's gonna be very obvious that it was Nick who did it and that Brad paid for it. Like it's just like very obvious. And they're all too stupid to do it like cleanly.

And there no one's gonna get away with it. Yeah. So Lucy and Mads are doing the master. And Lucy's like, oh my God, It's just very obvious, and they're all too stupid to do it cleanly, and there's no one's going to get away with it. Yeah. So Lucy and Mads are doing the master, and Lucy's like, oh my god, Mads, they're going sick in the sink, that's what the smell is. I mean, come on, you guys, you fucking pigs. He barfed in the sink, and you guys just left it there for them to clean up. That is so more, like people who aren't even embarrassed, you know, like zero fucking

shame, disgusting. And the thing is the toilet is right there. Okay, like you could have just gone one extra foot and opened up the lid and puked in the toilet, but you did it in the sink. And then you also got ready for dinner and like you washed up whatever, but the sink looked like, like how did that happen?

How did you know that? I'm ready for dinner like that. Yeah, they just ignored it. Like someone else will do it. So now the next plates are being delivered and Randy lights a smoke right at the table. And I was like, wow, even as someone who smoked forever, I don't even I just kind of like a trashy look. Yeah, it's true. And it's like who does that?

On a yacht like they don't know and is allowed to do that. How are they letting Randy get away with all of this? He's just like trash. It's just so gross. He's just like lonely trash. Garbage and we'll probably get honestly we'll probably get a message from him being like you guys don't understand and actually you Fuck you. Fuck you save yourself the typing you are absolute fucking understand. And actually you guys, fuck you, fuck you, save yourself to typing. You are absolute fucking trash. Okay. You're only okay. People in apology, you owe the world in politics. You owe humanity in a politics.

You owe a crap up Beth in apology. So, so then, Stake and Parsnaps come out next, and then Nick, the dumb one, he goes, what's a parsnap? And so Brad, the dumb one, he goes, oh, what's a parsnip? And so Brad, the little one is like, he just sort of sighs, like, he's exhausted by this question. Like, he has to answer these sort of dumb questions

all the time and he's like mortified. He knows his mom is watching. And he's like, mother doesn't approve of you and you're just not helping the case right now asking about parsnips. He goes, it's basically a mix between, and then Nick goes, a potato and parsley, like, now, okay. Why don't you look at what's on your plate

and tell me what part of that looks like parsley, okay? Okay. Tell me, tell me what part of that white root vegetable in front of you looks anything like parsley. But yeah, parsley at least makes sense because it's part of the word, right? Parsley. So parsley, okay. But what's the nip then?

What's the snip? It's like the nip-daw parsley root. If you said parsley root, I mean, it does sort of look like a parsley root. I'll give him that. But he wasn't thinking about parsley roots. He probably doesn't realize that parsley has roots. So he thinks it's just like,

it just like grows magically on flat earth. I'm so mad about the parsing situation I can't partially has roots. So you think it's just like, it just like grows magically on flat earth. I'm so mad about the parsnip situation I can't even tell you. I'm so mad about the caviar. Like I hate these people. The caviar in parsnip combo is so, it's just like so lethal and toxic. It's just like they're just like so bad.

And then Brad is exasperating, goes, just think potato. I'm like, no, that's wrong too. Parsif is just like a white carrot. Yeah, the disinformation. Zoo. So Daisy is now looking at the barf, because Lucy is freaking out.

She's like, can you believe that I can't do it, I can't. Daisy's like, I'm flabbergasted that these people are over four to years. Really, you dated Gary. So, then, Graham's boyfriend Todd is like, last night this woman was judging the gimp on the street. I was like,

oh my God, these people. I was like, Todd, you're doing so well. All you have to do is not say a single thing and let the, let the thrupple just be terrible. I know, I was like, just a couple's mice and I got to this part,

the swipe pause because I was like, wait, I just said Todd was like, that's how couples mice, and I got to this part, that's why I paused, because I was like, wait, I just said Todd was mice, 10 minutes ago. No, it's like, yeah, they were judging the gimp in the street. Like there was, like I don't know what that was,

I don't even know the context, but I already know that this is not- The mom was being evil with the thruple, and the mom was being evil on the street, and she was being a bitch with the- Someone who, you know, like like disabled and so I'm not even sure if disabled is the proper term that we use anymore, but at least I have the awareness not to call someone like GIMP and then make fun of her.

And she's like yeah well we were just people watching and then Brad the tiny one's like I'm yeah we were doing people commenting right That's what it was. And it goes, yeah, because the amount of people, I mean, it is amazing how many people don't have mirrors in their house. I was like, oh, God, I hate you too now. I hate all of you. I know, I was like, that's right. I forgot, Deb said this.

Also, by the way, this applies to your entire group. Have you guys seen how you guys look? So it's a bit... Exactly. And then Brad actually goes, yeah, well, the backstory is it was a very large people and very tiny clothes. I mean, never expect for an others around them. Am I right? Mike, a look at your fucking husband. Yes. Is wearing a child's shirt. He's wearing a child's

small. Yeah, there is like some industrial strength trying to get those buttons latched up. Okay, and you're going to talk about this. And Grant, who is the one wearing the ridiculous statement necklace and being the one who I thought I was gonna be making fun of the most, is actually, he is actually the voice of Fresno all this and he's like, well, I don't give a shit if they're happy then whatever, mind your own business. So now Randy gets, this makes Randy mad.

I wrote, yes, Randy is mad that he's different. He's different necklace. Yep, what you say? I wrote, yes, Randy is mad that he's dangerous. He's dangerous. He's dangerous. Yeah, what did you say? I wrote, yeah, it's Grant. Team statement necklace. Randy is in, Randy is like, no, we get to fat shame people. He's like, but at the same time though, you would not fuck them.

And Grant goes, well, that is nothing, nothing to do with them being themselves. I was like, what a piece of shit Randy is. Like shaming people for like not being hot enough to fuck. Like you can only talk to people that are hot enough to fuck. No one would fuck any of you. They're still being nice to you.

I'm just so gross. Sorry, bro. So, grants like, yeah, that has nothing to do with them being themselves. I mean, it does. It does. It has nothing to do with what you're saying. So, what an act.

Like, change from smoking all over him and. I agree. Why are you ending the season like this? Like I get like horrible people are sometimes fun. This is not fun. Okay. Horrible people are supposed to be fun. Yes.

Oh, I thought this was deeply fun. I thought this was really fun. Oh, yeah. I was like, oh my god, look at these awful, awful people. I was like, I can't wait to turn them apart. So Grant is like, well, they could do whatever they want without me, it's not about me. And then so now Randy is upset that Grant will not

like pass judgment along with him against people who are not like hot enough to fuck. And Brad is like, well, sorry, you got pressed about something that has nothing to do with you. And Randy was like, I'm sick of your opinion. Oh, he excels really loud. I can don't ever try me again, bitch. Jay throws his arm over the mom and points in his face.

And don't try me again. And Grant's like, you barked at me and my other fucker. And he's like, you turned it into something that wasn't even a thing. And the mom's like, well, how about those mints? I was like, oh, you shut up, Debra, I think. Matilda, monster. You shut up.

That's what I started. And now Brad is very happy to like say, have fighting words, because now he's like, now he's like, has Randy as a shield. Like, his Randy will beat him up. I can say whatever I want. So they're both this, I was like, Brad, I was rooting for you.

You're stuck in a toxic relationship. I was like, oh no, your piece is shit too. You and out, and you're making fun of someone in the street who like, I don't know, isn't walking the way you want them to walk. And now you're gonna cover behind your boy friend and go after the guy who actually has some common sense in the situation.

Yeah, and he's also one of those who goes up and fights right beside his man until he wants to be a victim. And then he's like, oh my god, he's so mean. Oh my god, he's so mean. Oh my god, you know, so mean. So Todd takes Grant and Todd brings because Grant's getting really mad. So Todd takes Grant downstairs to their room

and they're just so cool off into talk. And Grant's like, interesting people and Randy's like, and you just say, what? Interesting what? Interesting what? And so, George, you're a very interesting man. And he goes, say it out loud, you piece of shit. He just did, you idiot.

So Randy's like, yeah, fuck him. Talk and do better. Talk and do better. And he ashes a cigarette out on the plate. Otter garbage. So the drama music is the couple goes downstairs. And Randy's like, I'm gonna go talk to that man, but I was like, not me.

And he goes, I am letting out. And for that's like, oh my god, please just let him out. I don't want to be part of this. But you are. And you were just cheering him on. You were just cheering him on. Yeah, you were just cheering him on. You were just cheering him on. Yeah, you were just cheering him on and getting him even more riled up. And now you're just happy that you don't have to deal

with it anymore. And now you're also not doing anything to stop your reachful husband, you're just cowering. You're like, oh my god, what do I do? So now Randy goes, Randy shoves the rest of us to bubble out of the booth. He's like, get out of the way. They're like tumble out of the booth.

And then he goes storming downstairs. And Randy just walks into their room. And Randy's like, you guys have to realize. And Randy's like, um, you can't just come into a room, dude. Like, get out of my room. Get out of my room. And then Todd loses his shit. Todd goes berserk.

He walks out of the room and he points down the hall and he's like, get out of this room, get out, get out of this room or get off this boat. This is unbelievable. Also, this is unbelievable. Yeah, these guys are the main ones. Obviously, they don't know these other three, right? I don't think they know this is trouble. I think the low deck paired them up because they do that sometimes with people where they're

like, oh my God, we're a group of friends. But then you find out later that they were never a group of friends, it's just random people who said they'd come on the show so they were like, oh, they're gay, some they're gay. So let's put them all together. Yeah, didn't work out. Yeah, it's hard to like get off the boat. And so now Glenn shows up and he's like,

and he's like, is this how you wanna talk? Is this how you wanna act? And Glenn's like, okay, well, you know what? I'm telling you, the first moment I see anyone getting aggro, it's my favorite word, aggro, they will be off the boat. Okay, keep that in mind. Okay, and the second moment I see someone aggro, you'll not only be off the boat,

but I'm gonna have the girls from season one sing that song on guitar. Yeah, we still like out of our rounds. You don't want to go to that place. You don't want to have to listen to her song. And we're on these like, we're not even out. And he's like oh, yeah, keep it in mind when you talk to your friends But we aren't even finally we just want to talk. He's like let me make it clear He's like there's nothing to be clear about dude. You're getting at work with me

You know you were this far from getting away all line here it comes. Don't think it didn't, don't think it didn't, don't laugh. Laugh and trees. And he's like, no. Straight white girl doing singer songwriters, trying to have jassy boy song. This is ruined. That girl has just like all she wanted with the sound like an Apple commercial,

where it's like they hire like some 13 year old French girl to sing a song like to toybox music. Oh I hate I hate jazzy voice on a singer-songwriter. I'm how I'm tired when I think about yo had I want to sing like this. So basically Randy gets told, right? And he's like, this is ridiculous. And then Ray opens his door. And he goes, Yeah, it's ridiculous. It's ridiculous.

I tried to have a normal conversation with him after I barged into his room on the announcement and welcome. So whatever, that's. And then Daisy comes down. I was surprised at this. She comes down and she's like, well, maybe that's best to leave until the morning

when everyone's calmed down. How about that? And we're in this like, absolutely, absolutely. Thank you. Now I'm gonna go wipe my ass with all the towels that you have to clean in the morning. Okay. Bye.

So then Brad upstairs is like, if Randy gets rubbed the wrong way, then you're fucked. You're really fucked. So he's like clearly. And Deborah puts her hand, the mom puts her hand on his shoulder and she's like, no honey, no. And then Lucy's like, I've dealt with not Clevve, seems like this. This woman wanted to get into the VIP part and I wouldn't let her because she wasn't in that section and she punched me. And then I fell down the stairs and rolled out into the street where I was hit by a taxi,

which I rolled over the hood of and was flown into the air. Then I dropped right at the edge of a woodshipper. Almost lost me here that day. Ah, now that I think about it, no one actually ever punched me. I just walked me face into a pipe. Oh, well. So the couple is in the room and Todd's like, I'm going to go down. It's all right.

Just let it go. And then Deb is, she's hugging Brad up on the deck. And she's like, honey, you deserve so much better. And Brad's whispering, because if we get divorced, he's going to take me for everything I have. And she goes, you didn't get a prenup. She goes, no, she's, what the fuck were you thinking? I'm just like, I know.

I hope he does take you for whatever you're worth. You little fucking rats. No, you know. You're just as bad. take you for whatever you're worth. You little fucking rats. No, you know. You're just as bad. You both suck. You're terrible. I'm not buying your victim act either. You were just being really mean five seconds ago.

Yeah, exactly. They can go down together in a pit of misery. Yeah. So I hope you have fun going down together. So well, I guess they do technically go down there. They do go down together. So, Chase is like, I feel like I can help because I'm in a security guard for a look at these methods.

So, me and Walt Daisy and Gary are talking about relationship stuff. So, you're talking about the morning drama, you know, Gary's completely like, I look stirring up, you blem blem blem. And he's just like, well, I look stirring up to you, blah, blah, blah. And he's just like, well, I still don't understand what do you want from Mads? You either want to be with her, or you don't want to be with her. And he's like, well, I need to take some time off

and get my mind off of fucking work for once. You're blah, blah, blah, blah. And then he like sort of slapstates his thigh and grabs it, but like way too high up. I was like this guy Terrible The master okay, so now we're in the thruple the master back the thruple, you know, yeah, we get the title master Gavin the thruple so Randy's like I want I want to go home breath like them

Why can you stop drinking that and next like yeah and. And then maybe I'll feel better in the morning. Braddy is fucking both. So then Nick goes, go ahead and sleep, you messy motherfucker. And Chase is literally standing right outside their door, like a bodyguard. And then he waits for them to finally shut up and then walks off. So in the morning, Grant comes out and his blanched devorow, you know, poncho, nightgown thing, you know, flails up. And Alex tells Chase, yeah, I mean, I don't see any him as to anything today. Chase is like, I'm sure I did.

And there's like, you know, Grant and Todd are upstairs for breakfast or they're getting ready for breakfast and stuff. They're just like lying out there. They're saying they're open to a breakfast experience on the deck. And Chase and Mads are bantering and Chase is like, I dare you to hit on the guy you actually lock.

And Mads goes, I do it. I do it on him every day, cause I'm a hoe. Which is like, in Chase goes, your politician is what you are. And Alex passes by and goes, that's even worse than a hoe. Huh. Ha.

Ha. Ha. So then Daisy sends maps to the beach. And it's kind of hilarious because she's sending him with Alex and then breakfast delivery and blah, blah. So they have to lead like an exercise. They have to do exercise with the guests on the beach,

which what? What kind of job is this? But you guys don't have to do this. It was supposed to be a group activity without the guests, but obviously the Thrupple TM they slept in because they got wasted and they were fighting all night. So while that group goes off to do their morning cow settings on the beach, the Thrupple is talking in the guest room again, like high drama in this room.

So now Nick is like, guys, if we can't enjoy ourselves here in Sardinia, then why the fuck are we together? existential crisis, it's the throbble So then the couple is ordering tequila punch for the pitch and they're going they're leaving They're going on the tender right and then Nick and Randy are like, um, how are we supposed to even approach the others? I mean, it's like, uh, let's just let's just look shit happens. We'll just move forward. So Lucy goes into the master cabin and she's like, Oh my God, the sink is fucked and the toilet is not moving at all.

I can't. I can't. And then she just starts melting down. She's like, I may be made, I may have to clean toilets. Spass would never have to flush the toilet From grown ass men, fuckin' groans These gays do to Lucy what gravity was not able to do. Destroy her.

So Lucy. Gravity's tried. Gravity's tried. So Lucy facetimes her dad. She's like crying She's like this people are animals. I'm not even joking dad and dad has no patience for his like oh For fuck sake as full days Lucy get through it. It's about the animals that I will I don't blame her. I'm totally on her side But I think it's so funny that the dad is so used to picking up calls from a hysterical Lucy.

He's on a bike with a bike helmet on when he answers the phone. He's like, all right. You're all right. And he's like always answering it to see if it's an ambulance calling or if it's a hospital or something calling to tell him, you know, Lucy's falling down a volcano hole

or something. It's like, he's like, you got, you got Saturday, Sunday, Monday. Okay, he got, you got sat at a Sunday Monday. Okay, don't break now. You fragile little little girl. And she's like, I don't even flash the toilet, dad. Is that what everyone else is dealing with it? It's not just you. Yeah, please don't let it get you. It's not worth it. It's like, all right, what a game then. Oh, good. then, over on the beach for the workouts,

I felt bad for Mads because they're like, hey, Mads, can we use you as like a plank? And she's like stuck in plank position for like 15 minutes. And they're like lifting up her legs and they're like having her stand there and they're jumping over her. You just know, she's like, guys, I think my core is about to get out.

Can we stop this, please? It's just so weird. This whole workout is really weird and grants like oh my god nice tight core mods and Alex goes yeah, thanks for the sick pump man's because he's working out with them So the next day go swimming and then Gary and Colin are doing sales stuff and talking and Colin's like he's at the beach then Alex and man's like, he said the beach then. Alex and means. He's like, who? Alex and meads. So what's on your mind? You don't see me normal perky self? Is it because meads is with Alex and they might make a little boom chick a boom boom.

It was, well, you know, I don't know. Maybe it's like the end of the season. You know, I'm just like, I'm really tired of everyone telling me how I should feel. I'm like, what is Gary talking about now? How people tell him how we should feel. Now he's going to be the sensitive soul who's tired of too much external input, because he's like going through things.

People aren't telling you how you should feel. They're telling you what is proper decorum on a boat when you're in a management position. In Collins, I actually don't know. I was too sure it's not because mates and Gary are on the beach right now, possibly making little babies named Mallex Mancellix or

Alex or Romantic name B's extremely I'm tired of people telling me how I feel He's like he's telling you that because everyone you daisy daisy keeps asking me if I like Mets And I say no I guess but I don't know what's so concerning to her Like what difference does it make if I like meds or not? Concentrate on you and your life. That's a cut this guy's so he's such a Under minor in asshole. Yes, he's such an under minor. He really he's trying to make he's trying to make Daisy seem like Obsessed with whether or not Gary is telling Gary. he's telling Gary, he's telling Colin like,

yeah, my feelings are her and then obviously Daisy's in love with me and, right, you know, still waiting for him. He's waiting for him to advance frustrating. He is a real piece of shit. He is like a psychopath. So now the beach people all come back and Todd and Grant are back on the boat

and Randy just goes up to Grant goes, Paul G's always very rude, and they just hug, and Grant's like, thanks, I needed that. I really appreciate that. I was like, oh, fuck you guys, all of you. Don't take him back as a friend. When they're leaving, they hate him. So when they're leaving the beach, they go,

hey, are we gonna go soon? And Alex has, he's been in a conversation with Manson and goes, yeah, you have a good sense of style. Yeah, okay. Okay, I'll let him know. They're still talking about their style style. So fucking funny. It's like hours later. So now Daisy checks him with Colin. She's like, hi, Adon. And Colin's like, well, I had an interesting chat with Gary. She's just wanted about what. And she goes, well, He's very confused because he keep asking him if he likes Maddenaw and he's like, why is she asking me and why is she

so interested in Scott Me thinking of it as well. This is like, well he is my friend. The other day asked him why he was upset and I asked him why he was upset and I didn't go up to him and randomly be like, oh, so hard, you're like, my eyes didn't come from the eye, you don't know, I looked upset at that's why I asked him. Well, that's not what he made it sound like. And he's like, my defense mechanism's to kick in a bit. I don't feel like Gary's just gonna step

us hard and let us be together. You don't? Really? You don't? And you didn't foresee this being a problem. And Daisy didn't either. And Daisy still doesn't think, like, Daisy still doesn't see that it's weird to be with Gary,

like asking about his feelings and what he's got from us. This whole throttle is so weird. And also, none of you have any real chemistry. Do you think? What do you think? Yeah, I like Daisy in Colin, but I have to say, you know, I'm a progressive person.

I don't, I know, like if someone wants to be in a throttle, I really don't care, like as long as everyone's happy. But I would say that this episode is really not doing great advocacy work on behalf of Threpples, whether it is the gay Threpple or the straight Threpple. They're both really showing this much. It's like friendship. It's hard in a three, because it's like roommate situations

that other two can always gang up on them. And it's just always never going to work out. It's not a triangle. It needs to be like four or five. You know, then when I can get into it, you can get different teams going. It's never been more terrible. It needs to be like four or five. Yeah. Then when I can get into it, you can get different teams going. But one person is always gonna need someone else

to talk to against the other two. Yeah, this is bad. So now there's like some more stuff that just is happening on the boat, just like things. And then we come back to Colin and Daisy, but now they're in a different room and they're still talking. And Colin is saying like, you know,

Gary, he's desperate for a relationship. And then we cut to Madison and she's like, I can keep on a good smile and smile a lot of shit, but there's a point where I can't keep smiling anymore. And then it cuts back to Daisy and she's saying, like, you know, I really couldn't care about Gary in a lot of his relationships. Had I was only trying to help him as a friend.

And Colin's like, well, the way Twissings is just confusing. Gary, have you, Colin, have you watched this show? You've been on it. This is your third year on the show. Gary and Daisy have had a thing this whole time. Like, why is this so surprising to Colin? I'm, I'm very confused and I'm not getting his whole, I'm not buying his whole, I'm just as sensitive.

God, getting my feelings hurt by all of this. I don't buy it. I think it's kind of buying. I don't buy it. I think it's a drama queen, but I think it's just a drama queen. And he's doing it on purpose. So, yeah, something to like be a victim about for future dates. I don't know. I don't feel like he has a future date victimization going on, but I do feel like he has a drama queen. I feel like he's both things. He's a drama queen. And I do think that he's like confused. And I don't know why he's confused. He shouldn't be confused, but I do think like he is a drama queen. I feel like he's both things. He's a drama queen. And I do think that he's like confused. And I don't know why he's confused. He shouldn't be confused.

But I do think that it's a sincere confusion. So Daisy, he's a fancy guy. Off goal, no answers, he only guesses. Well, just have to see how this pans out because Daisy says, hey, that's respectful to her, Georgia, and you're the person I want to be with. Gary, I'm in calling. He says, he is disrespectful to our job. And you're the person I want to be with Gary. I mean, Colin.

Listen, I've been Colin Gary. I mean, Gary Colin. God, I'm talking about. Oh, look, they left a box here. I do mind Garying this to the front. I mean, carrying it to the front. This is why I think they have no chemistry and they don't belong together.

And some people will argue the opposite that this is proof that they have no chemistry and they don't belong together. And some people argue the opposite that this is proof that they do have chemistry and belong together. But here's my theory. They're like laying on the bed, but her foot is on his shoulder. Yeah. She's so comfortable. And I get to some people like, oh my god, that's so cute. They're already so comfortable to get. No. If you're already that comfortable together, you guys aren't even dating yet. You know what I mean? You can't be that comfortable. You're going to be wiping boogers on each other before you're even married. You can't do that.

By the way, I have a very important question. I have put my hand on my shoulder to show what it looked like for Daisy to put her foot on con shoulder. Why does my hand look like it's coming from a dead corpse? It does. It's something with your legs. It's terrifying. Well, why do I have Kyle Richards' hands except they make sure a lot of them.

I have a corpse hand. Ah, that's a zombie pulling me down. Okay, so this means we're in the end. It's your lighting. I'm telling you, I don't know what it is about your lighting. But I have everything else. The lighting is normal. Look, my hand is normal here, but it becomes a corpse here.

But it's normal here, but it's a corpse here. It's normal here, corpse here. It's the bend, it's all in the bend. I like that. I have like a Jesus halo on me. I don't really know that it's a corpse. Your sunset is beautiful. It isn't it?

The sun's setting right behind me, but it's like in the center of my head. So it looks like it's wonderful. I'm like bald Jesus. I'm like a fungal fester was the son of God. It's beautiful. I put up a sailboat video not realizing that people would be walking around throughout the all of it.

And so I've been trying to like fast forward back and forth to get the people out of it the entire episode, which has been fun, because I want to be distracting. So it's a cliffhanger, which is basically Daisy saying, like if Gary, if Gary can't be friends with me without stirring shit, then I don't want to be his friend. So, right. Right, right, right. Yeah, exactly.

I'm the colonist. I was even. Yeah, colonist just filler. You know, this is the gate. This is the Gaze story, okay? Sorry. It just is love him or hate him You this is the gate the Gary and Daisy love story Collins just like that guy who spent a season You know in the in the spanners

So now we have one episode left with the season many questions have to be asked which is 2 days in column have a future what's gonna happen with Gary and Mads? Will Brad and Nick push Randy overboard and then act like it was a drunk and accident? Who knows? Well, anybody like Colin or Chase, even though he keeps walking around telling everybody it's got a huge dick.

No, probably still won't. My guess is no. Like even a dick can't win that personality. Okay. Sorry. Well, everyone, I guess I should say. Everyone, thank you so much for being here. I won't make a bend do it.

It's not his turn to do it. And I feel bad to keep making it. Just keep pushing that responsibility. But everybody, we love you. Thank you for being here. You want to watch these videos. They're up on YouTube a week after. If you want to watch them the day they're posted,

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