Watch What Crappens - BelowDeck: Hard to Swallow

Episode Date: January 29, 2020

Kevin on Below Deck has been a dick all season; so it's appropriate that he heads into the finale presenting a giant cake dick to a bunch of unimpressed guests. Join us as we recap this penultimate episode, which features the usual blend of microaggresions and misogyny! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Nobody sucks it to us like Amy Sokcarellis. Jamie, she has no last namey. Let's go on a bender with Lauren Fender. Sip some scotch with Jessica Trotch. You're the Wyndham beneath our wings. Joe Wyndham. Assy Savoni, she don't take no baloney. You don't touch the Nicki Morgan letters.

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Lisa Wallent. Now that's what I call Wallentainment. Give him hell, Miss Noel. Always ready for Nicole Passa-Ready. Better than Tabooly, if Annie and Julie. Lordess, the Lordess of the Rings. We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva. She's not just a Sheila, she's a Danielle. Etch-O.

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Let's get Racy with Miss Stacy. Shannon out of a cannon Anthony. Incredible edible Matthew sisters and Meena Kuchikuchi Watch what crap Watch what crap Who cares what happens when there's so much that crap ends Poppins What happens? What happens? What happens? I have cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cr I'm Ben Madelker of the Real Housewives of Kitchen Island. There's a new episode.

Oh my goodness, there's a new episode up. So go check that out on YouTube. I'm gonna set YouTube.com as if no one knows where to find YouTube. YouTube.com. What? It knows where to find YouTube YouTube.com On a thing called the intermains If you ever heard of the internet you ever use Google before so yeah go check out the new episode of real housewares and Joining me is a wonderful man who also has a new content up with Rose Pricks bachelor's podcasts Ronnie Karen. What's going on Ronnie? Hi Prick's Bachelors podcast. It's Ronnie Karen. What's going on Ronnie? Hi. Hi. How's it going babes?

It's going great. I'm feeling very refreshed. We had a nice Monday off because there's no real housewives of Atlanta. So we got to relax a little bit. Come in fresh for today's below deck recap. But before we get into that, first and foremost, today is a crap and on demand day, which means you

could look at our beautiful on-shaven faces. Yeah, we're both on-shaven today. I know, I was going to shave and then I was like, I may get coffee instead. So that's at patreon.com slash watch for crap and we also just recorded a bonus episode where we talked about spy games, which is a ridiculous new show on Bravo, so we sort of gave our impressions of that. And then on top of that, we are, once again, hitting the road, this week we have some big shows in Texas. We have on Thursday, we have two shows in Austin, the first one is sold out, but we actually

still have tickets to the late show. Here's what we are recapping for the early show, we will be recapping the latest Vandipump rules episode. And then for the late show, we are doing Real Housewives of New York Classic episodes. Season 5 episode 14 is called Sluddy Island, but you may remember it from the famous moment of, whoa! Take a Zanax! Take a Zanax! Yeah, Mr. Ramona, Shinga's finest moment. Well, one of her finest moments. Yeah, one of them.

Uh, yes, that famous episode where a view of a dress shirt flies down to the Caribbean and it's like you should have put up sign up to say it's congratulations. So that's a great episode. We'll be doing that at the 10 o'clock show. And then on Friday, we have Houston show and we'll be doing Real Housewives of New Jersey. Next week, it's just a week away. I can't believe this Ronnie. Next week, we are going to

Birmingham, Alabama, really technically it's Hoover. Please come out and see us there. We are going to be having a super fun time. And then the very next night, we are going to New Orleans. So excited for that. That's that's going to be amazing and fingers crossed. We'll have some special guests. We have to confirm any of that. But either way, it's going to be a great time next week. And then we're going to round out February with Lawrence fucking Kansas and Omaha Nebraska. It's going to be wonderful. Watch your crap. It's our comfort tickets. Come join us. Don't be afraid to come solo. You'll make friends. Just ask some of the people from this past weekend who made friends.

So there's that. Yeah, like us. Yeah, we're always gonna make friends. Crappens show, okay? Yeah. I'm looking up pictures right now to tell everybody, hey, we're gonna do this real house after New York episode.

And so I've got like hundreds of pictures of Ramona Singer in front of me. I mean, everyone is better than the one before it. She is just what a treasure Ramona Singer is. Seriously. It's funny. If you look up at the screen, you'll see three of them right here on crap and on demand under my chin.

That's such amazing. Pop icon. Pop icon. Pop icon. Pop icon. So, yes. Anyway, let's get into below deck because the season is is

crashing to an end with just crazy male toxicity I know it seemed to have like really crescendoed last week, but it's still at a nice simmer for today. And by the way, my steady pace of misogyny this time, you know, it wasn't like two in your face, it wasn't, it was subtle, it was just the perfect amount. The nice like balance, right? And by the way, below deck, a sailing yacht premieres next Monday, and I'm actually very excited for it. I never thought the added twist of below deck, but just diagonally would be fun. But I'm into it. Like, wow, what would below deck be like on an angle? Yeah. And now we know what it looks like when we live in a world where Adam is a crossover star. Yeah. Adam is anchoring a show. Little good. Oh, do you get it? And I appreciate it. It's a terrifying time we live in.

It is. It really is. Also, if you learn how to surgery, do you see him on the couch behind the house? It's what happened. You learn. I wish I was as lucky as B. Lurick. I'm like, he's looking at his cosmetic. I can't see it. Yeah, he got into the face. Yeah, he got into the face. B. B. Lurick had to get surgery because, well, he broke his toe. I had to take him to the place to get his toenails cut, right? So I made an appointment. And of course, we went out of town.

Didn't, I'm a terrible father. So his nails were too long to disappoint. So he hurt his nail on the blanket and he was bleeding. So I took him to the doctor and they were like, well, his teeth are really gross too Well, we're talking about your terrible parenting. So I was like okay Well, how much is that and they told me but they had to put him under to do it right So I was like well if you're putting him under can you take these big growths off his side because they look like cancerous growth

But they're not cancer. They were tested but the doctor and I'll they wouldn't take them off because it was too dangerous to put the dog under, but I was like, hey, if you're going under, get all done, get a whole house, you know what I mean? So he came back with better teeth, he's, you know, it seems like he himself don't like yourself. He won't keep his cone on, so I'm chasing him around like the cone police because he keeps finding a way to pull off his cone and he's got a new face. I mean he's got the face of a French bulldog now. So it's a

little bit less than six bets. Yeah. This is very exciting. I know that you guys are dying to hear from that but that's where my concentration is today. I keep looking behind here. Let's see. I want to see I can't see him in his I want to see be learned a cone. He doesn't have a coin on he took he takes it off. I'm telling you. How does he take it off? He finds a way. He goes up against a wall and angles himself where he can grab it with his head. He can grab it with one of his paws and he keeps taking it off. And then I started just putting it on tighter because it's like a Velcro thing. And then I started just putting it on tighter because it's like a velcro thing.

And then he's like, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. That was like, okay, now I'm gonna kill, murder the dog with the, with the cone. Anyway, sorry. So if I'm distracted, it's because I'm on lick patrol.

Well, the good news is that Bueller doesn't seem to be very active at the moment. No, he's pondering. Pure pain. Like his face is mad. Wait, can we see him again? I really want to see Bueller again. Like he's on the pure pain. Like his face is mad. Wait, can we see him again? I really want to see Bueller again.

Like he's staring out the window. He's just a cute ass dog. He's staring out the window. Like there's anyone else that could take me. Anyone. Oh, the plate of clean teeth. The plate. The poor dog.

Okay, so Masajini. That's the point. Yeah, so the point is this. Masajini. So this week on Blow Deck, we pick up again, where we left off from last week, which was the guys being drunk assholes and being disgusting and fighting with Kate

and then Captain Lee having to come downstairs and say, at this hour, I don't want to hear slamming doors and loud voices. As he says in a loud voice and then slams the door. Yeah. And Tana's like, holy shit, not good, Jimmy, quick it, dude. Yeah, and Kate just goes, well, I'll see you later. Good talk.

Good talk. Good talk. But then she doesn't do a good bed crying. Yeah, which is always so weird to see Kate cry. Yeah, it is weird. It's like, yeah, I don't like it. So Riley's like, what's up, Kate? You know, they really hurt my feelings.

They're like so mean to me. They're terrible. She says, well, we all have our breaking points. Riley being comforting is still so, it's like abuse comfort, you know? Yeah, she's like, I imagine her consoling someone just in the most aggressive way. They're there, they're there, got it, they're there.

They're there. She's that girl who like patch you on the back when she's hugging you and you like cough up a chickpea. You know, like a chickpea flies across the room. She's like, can't be hard and have resting bitch face, but she's also vulnerable. I'm like, that's, I know, just felt like, I felt assaulted by Riley's comfort.

I know, it's like an assault, a mean card. You know, it's like,. I know it's like an assault mean card. You know it's like happy birthday stupid. Yeah. So okay it's like if I started my yachting career when this behavior was acceptable, I would not be here right now. It's such an assholes and I'm over it. You know what if they want to make me the bad guy, I can play that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Finally. Seriously. Although she's sort of been low-key threatening that all season. I think it was about like half a season ago that she was like, I'm done being nice to Kevin. I'm done. And then they keep showing shots for being like, Kevin, the gas love your food. Like, hey, you mean her. Can you do it great? So yeah, so it's the next morning.

Oh, by the way, we should say that Riley, her job evaluation or workplace review was about rather have explosive diarrhea than work with these fuckers. Got it. So Captain Lee is like, well, we've had this season has been extremely rough. We've had injuries and then we see a flashback of Brian. My name! As he hits it on the deck. Quitting, Abbie like, I don't know, but we're like,

ugh, cut out for this. And then we've had injuries again. Oh my nose! We had one deck hand fall over in the shower for no good reason. I mean, it's the size of a coffin standing on its end and somehow We managed to fall on the floor. I don't know how that happens, but literally impossible to fall down in the showers, but he did it. He did it and still somehow asked in respect some more. I don't get it. Don't understand it.

Main crew, main crew Salon Salon main crew main crew. And Kate's like, huh? Do you think this is gonna be a rousing pep talk? No So captain leaves like all right What happened last night? I don't give a flying fuck about you know, I don't care if my fuck is flying It's on the ground on a train swimming. I don't care where the fuck it is, because I don't care about it. Anyone who can't get along go downstairs, pack your bags, fuck something while you're flying. Maybe you'll need the fuck. I've got this flying

up in the air. I'm going to get you to get the other high five. And by the way, if your fuck fucks my fuck, that means I will buy association not care about your fuck either, because I already inherently don't care about my fuck that means I will buy association not care about your fuck either because I already inherently don't care about my fuck Guess about my flying fuck that's flying up there not giving a fuck about your fuck I'm like it loud either so be quiet even if you're in the sky with my flying fuck God of fuck you know what happens when my computer goes to sleep and I see a bunch of flying toasters I say look look at all those flying fucks. I don't care about If anyone thinks I won't fucking fire someone in the middle of a flying fuck, you don't

fucking charter me. And an ashton, and an ashton like leans forward and looks at Riley like, see, you thought you were safe, but you're not. Yeah, he looks at Riley like she's gonna stand up and be like, I will not get along with everybody. Got it. And just leave downstairs. like she's gonna stand up and be like, I will not get along with everybody, got it! And just leave downstairs.

He's such a little shithead, even with his side looks in a group meeting, you know? Which didn't mean anything. But no, but it did because remember last episode, she was like, oh, you think that you're gonna fire me? You really think that I mean, you get fired in the last charter, so he was looking now to be like,

see, see, see, show up, Aston. So the captain's like, all right, let's get to work. We've got two and a half days left. Jesus Christ, I can eat a shit sandwich every second every day for two and a half days. And I can, if I can do it, so can you. I ordered a shit sandwich, but I don't give a fuck express and guess what? I hated every fucking second about it. Didn't even care about it.

Still ate the whole thing, had a smile on my face. Okay, get back to work kiddos. We used to have an eye, don't give a flying fuck at my first restaurant. Shit sandwich. Right? Yeah, shit sandwich, neighborhood barn grill. Okay, we got to wear name tags on our lapels and the name tags, and I don't give a fuck what my name is, I just want your order. That's the sort of way to where I am, all on the name tag.

So, Ashton is like dick can't do it. Can't Asela, so dick's Dicks, Dicks, Asela, so and Riley goes and turns her radio off in the in the laundry room. Yeah, I miss that. Yeah, so they basically said they're schedule and it's like who wants to work with Riley. So it's gonna be Brian. And then it's like time for provisions, time for provisions. And we just, they're just bringing stuff on to the boat. And they have these like, like... Least of Ander pump flower crowns. Yeah, flower crowns, but like, they do flower crowns.

What else would you call them? I don't know. Laureates maybe, I don't know. But Kevin's all the same, it's like... You see? Wait. Laureate. Oh, you know, Laureate. She's gonna, she's get, you know, she was gonna be a charter guest, but she missed her chance. So she wanted to talk about a smarty pants real housewife. Got Laureates. Yeah, Laureates. God, she was coming. Oh, God, she came to see in which barn grill. Every single weekend thought she ran the place guess what she didn't I did

Yeah, you gotta wear a goddamn gown every time you go out Lori it. Yeah Here's here's one thing I know I would never want to hear again for my fucking life I'd like a piniacalata with extra malibu in it courtesy of of Lori at that was her special drink Meanwhile Ronnie is something's happened to Ronnie over. Did you get a trolley horse? Yes, I'm too fat to like cross my legs properly. So I was crossing one of my legs under my butt and then I got a loriat horse, right? It's like a Charlie horse, but it thinks it's too good for, it's too cool for school. All right. Lasting and eat is another crew member going down with a lorry at horse. Okay, so yeah, she's wearing her least savander plant flower crown. Glad we could agree on the title of that kind of crown. LVPFC. Yeah, and um, I'm sure you guys can have his. Oh Kevin's like with the fly around. And he likes to think it's

over there. It's for more out boosting day. So then so then it's not a kid is like sitting on the dock just like smoking a cigarette having some time off and Tanner just walks up to her and goes, Hey, listen, so we'll set a sexy right after the night

after the night out or before we go out again, you know, she's like you know she's like You know what let's just like let it happen organically. He goes yeah, okay. We'll go hold foods on that shit I don't know what that means Like you set it out loud not gonna be the day and he's okay love you Could you imagine even walking up to our coworker even though you've been flirting like could you just imagine just like Hey, so let's set a sex date. Hey when the week in the fuck So Brian goes up to Riley, you know

Brian brew is another one who's just totally fake like Kevin. Yeah, sometimes he says stop being such an asshole Okay, but for the most part he actually you know He's much meaner behind her back. And I think Brian is the same way. It's like Brian's so big and tough whenever Riley's not there. And he's just with his bruise. But then whenever it's with her, he's like, you seem okay today, everything going all right. Like, yeah, I just support this as always. Good to see you. I came with caught. Yeah. And he's like, um, we're actually

not really okay. Okay. So now what are you going count on Riley to help you out with your your girlfriend? I wonder if Riley still wants to have sex with Brian because in the beginning when she first showed up She's like, I have a fuck him all night long get Courtney Addy here Cuz there's one like a down on him, but now she's just like you. I hope that she still doesn't like him because You know, I agree. I think that Brian is he plays the nice guy thing but he's still he's a dick too and it's always stuck with me when he said in the very beginning that his problem in relationships is that he would always go out and get wasted and lose his temper and stuff and that he had a really really bad temper and he wasn't proud of how he treated women in the past

and that and that and it's so thinly veiled. Yeah, it really is. I almost wonder if he's a sort of person who goes after the nice girl or has like the nice guy relationships to prove to himself that he is a nice guy. Sort of like Jacks, you know, last season on Vandipar Rool's does all like the sweet cute things to like prove to himself he is the nice guy. But there's still like real work that needs to be done. Who knows? But either way, Brian and Gortonier are still in a really bad place because last episode she stood up for Kate and he's like, you stand up for the wrong people. So, Gortony basically, her issue is that she doesn't like that Brian takes anything that does not agree with as a disloyal, as a disloyal overture. Everything

is a disloyalty. And Courtney is like, I'm allowed to have opinions that are different from him. And I don't know why I wouldn't be able to, you know? Yeah. I'm just like, I'm allowed to have thoughts. So thanks. So Kevin is talking to Kate and he's like, okay, you better. Oh, I wasn't laughing the interior. I'm just like, yeah, well, obviously like you're loud now. I guess. Yeah, of course we could not send it to Gale. Like, oh, got one, Kevin. Kevin shut up. I know. Seriously. Just cook something. Yeah. And then Courtney comes by eating some chocolate and cake. Is are you eating shit? She goes, um, it's chocolate. You imagine Courtney was actually just like eating feces. She's like, Oh,

well, awkward. We started off this episode with the pep talk about shit sandwiches. So So, come on kids, you can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, someday, parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful take on parenting. Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Browneau, we will be your resident not so expert experts.

Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding, and thinking. Oh yeah, I have absolutely been there. We'll talk about what went right and wrong. What would we do differently? And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone. So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to,

I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. So Courtney is talking to Brian and she's like, um, so you want to talk and he's like, music or Wendry app. Yeah, exactly and because and well he said he goes well, I told you what you did I told you exactly what you did used it up for Kate as if there's anything like wrong with that You know so she goes so she says yeah, I was crying you walk right past me goes Oh, so it's my float again, so it's like this whole victim complex, you know It's like yeah, it kind of is your fault. Okay, if it you know, it is possible that things can be your fault multiple times Especially if you do bone-headed things multiple times Brian

Yeah, he's like you know loyalty is a big thing in my life Everyone I grew up came from a broken home. So only loyalty was to each other I'm like, well sorry about your parents getting divorced You know someone asshole. He's like in the goonies or something. What is this? Like all you like he just is a lot for a kid. He's basically a cabbage. He's like my parents were divorced. And so therefore I only had my friends and loyalty was what kept us going. You know, not to discount the pain and that that comes along with having parents that divorce. But I mean, he's making it sound like he was, you know, left out in Ireland with a bunch of kids and they had to band together or else be killed off

by some dark force. Yeah, he's very orphanani right now. Like, okay, sorry about that. Still can't just be an asshole to people. Yeah, exactly. So he's like, I can't be nice guy, or little detoying, brew. Like, I'm done with this brew.

I'm sick of it, I'm headed, brew. I was like, you look so tough with your fucking bloody nose that you got from falling down and to stand up shower stupid so then yeah so then Courtney goes upstairs and she starts crying so Kevin starts hugging your and stuff and then Kevin and Brian goes over to Tanner. He starts bitching about Courtney and I feel like such an idiot. I feel like such an idiot.

You know, like, you know, he starts basically bitching about the situation. And in case now, like comforting Courtney and everything and Brian tells us, or he tells the brews, he goes, it's always you did this and you did this. It's never anything that she did. I'm like, what did she do? Tell me what she did What did she do? Well, who who gets mad at you for something that they did? You know what I mean? Like then why did you just get a Charlie horse?

You know the one you got a Charlie horse Of course, he's getting mad at you for stuff that you did and not that she did and only make sense So Courtney's like to her. Yeah, Courtney. Yeah, but Courtney, you know It's also like the curse of the hot guys. She should have dumped this guy a long time ago But he's like an ugly guy who doesn't work out would not get this far Sorry to say it because I know Courtney's always saying like whatever. I don't just check up with guys because they're hot Well, you're staying with them because he's hot because there was them like great conversation or anything that you were having at that dinner

that you were forced to go on. You know, get rid of him. It's the point. Get rid of him. Yeah, it makes me sad to see that like, you know, the beginning, she was like, I don't care. This guy, whatever, who cares? Who cares? Who cares? And now she's sort of fallen for him and that that she's like made to cry because of this douchebag that she seemed like she didn't even care about.

It was like, no. So then he goes, he goes, every time we talk, I have something like that. She runs and tells Kate, I'm like, well, what are you doing? Who are you telling right now? Tanner and Ashton. Yep. And like, why would he be so shocked

that she goes and runs and tells Kate? Kate's her friend. Kate is literally her friend. The whole fight is that she defended her friend. And now you're surprised that she would then go and talk to her friend about this issue they came up when she was trying to defend her friend. Yes. Also, these boys are the biggest tattletails.

Every single thing they do, they're like, who's brewed did you hear? So Kate's like, oh my god. This is the last charter and everyone is cracking. Cut to court and going, Simone, you're wearing the wrong skirt. Simone's like, oh, I'm jingling! Simone, you're wearing a curate cup for your skirts. Oh, really? Simone, you're wearing a skirt steak.

Seriously, get it together. So, yeah, so now they're lined up for the guests. And Kate's like to Captain Leach goes, have you ever wanted to throw up and smile at the same time? Yeah, second, second day into eating shit sandwiches every goddamn second. Think that's easy to keep down? Yeah, it's called laureate walking into the restaurant asking for one of her pinnacle out of this. It's laureate. Always describing yourself as the as the noble one. Yeah, laureate always trying to tell me how to make a proper onion peel just the way they do it at Apple bees, whatever that means. You're

on your own field way, I make them lower cat. So this new group of girls come in. Dun, dun, dun, dun. They're really party. It's like a typical party of girls. Yeah. It's like so, Jamel, uh, Hill, I believe for last time, it's, they're not wool girls. That's not the typical like, they're like hey, yeah, this is hey girls. Hey, hey girls. We're hey girls So Jamel Joe as a Jamel Hill. I've got to look it up. I think it's a male Hill, right? So she is like I don't know I don't know the last name. I think it's Jamel Hill. I've got to look it up I'm they write down first names, okay?

It's all they know so fast. So she's a sports cast, former sportscaster for me, SPN. So it's like a big celebrity charter and everything. So everyone's like all excited. And so we get like the boat tour, it's not all usual stuff. The boat tour, the boat leaving the dock, all that fun stuff. And they're gonna have a big 90s party

because Jamel just got engaged. And her friends like, here's the balloon thing. So have fun with that. And Kate friends like, here's a balloon thing. So how far with that? And Kate tells us that she loves the 90s because I would get a Scotch's and smoke a lot of pot. Is that so? Hi. I literally cannot imagine KHS in the Scotch show.

Scotch like the Mike Bostones. It was, it was, it was, it's, it's like a variation of punk that's been informed by reggae. It's, it's like Mube's half the soundtrack to Clueless. It had like a very big moment from like 95 to 97 at most. I mean, it's always been around and it's still around But it's like songs are like Like horn sections and like like horn sections and like boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom I'm sure there are some scot scot covers of patty lapone I guarantee there are But you know I'm gonna look it up. It's like Like never had to knock on wood remember that song

It's also my version of New Orleans. He's like, it's in the Barbara genre. It's like a little, a little innocent car beat. It's Ben's cartooning when he's mad at an old lady for changing lane to that. I wish my, I wish my Subaru had as much authority as that. My Subaru is like, Subaru had as much authority as that my super is like The worst All right, dammit. So here we go back to this show

So Kevin is in the kitchen and he's like, oh, let's do a good. It's like on a on a globe Stay and then we're gonna be chicken ball party chocolate base and Courtney goes word Did you just say word? And Courtney goes, word. And he's like, did you just say word? She's like, as in, I don't have words for how simple this food is. Seafood towers. Why not? Why not seafood tower?

So Ryan and Ashton are eating in the crew mess and Riley just gets food and passes them and Ashton's like, did she just take a feed to a room, shine? Quadrishine. Oh, I mean, they're snickering and I mean, it is so obnoxious. I mean, here's like a person who feels so uncomfortable around you that she has to eat her food in her room. It's almost like a high school,

the dorks that have to, you know, eat their lunch on the toilet in the bathroom. I just, it just disgusts me. I'm disgusted. I am disgusted. Gust, they just disgust me. I'm disgusted. I am disgusted. Gust is right, man. I'm turning into a stossie right now. I'm, how dare you.

How dare you make her eat in her bedroom? How dare you? It's my fucking birthday. It's my fucking yacht. So Simone is chatting with the guests, and they love that she's from Johannesburg and Jamal starts talking about how she was in Johannesburg working for 30 days and Simone's like, this woman is kick-offs!

She's kick-offs! This woman, she's totally kick-offs. And, um, uh, yeah, so now there's like, now it's lunchtime and there's food that's coming through and, um, everyone's, everyone likes the soup, everyone's really into the soup and, um, and Kate tells Kevin, she's like in the kitchen and she tells Kevin that she wants to know what all the elements are of the meal, even if she's not always in the galley, she just wants to know what the elements are. And he's like, what's your north around, we do? You're like daddy, not around, but I have a lot of opinions about my life and my food.

Daddy, yeah. Because he has plates or something, and he's like, I don't need these Courtney knives what I need. He's like, yeah, but you're gonna have to understand that there are times where I'm not in the galley because I'm actually working in other places, but I still need to know what's going on. And he's like,

Gumbang, daddy! I spoke, I spoke to Daddy, I miss you. But the thing is this just last episode, he was complaining that like when they had to serve dinner inside and then she couldn't access the pictures to do table side soup pouring. And he's like, Kaya no, he seems to be a little bit behind. She's just not with it. I'm like, she is literally asking you to tell her what's going on and you don't want to tell her.

So I mean, seriously? Seriously. So the girls are asking Kate when it says, could you give us an idea like what's going on the rest of the day and Kate's like Eating just king dinner at 8 30 and Jamal's like actually we prefer a nine and she tells her friends She's like I'm not here for someone to tell me what time I'm eating okay. They set their schedule to us Not the other way around and I was like oh good we go. Someone's gonna try and start some fights. And you're starting it with the wrong person, because it's like the end and Kate literally does not care. Literally just like that. Maybe very famous, but she's like, you have fun with your paid

appearance on TV. Miss Fainty's person. I'm glad you really stood up for that extra 30 minutes. Okay, great. Yeah. Oh, really got me on time. Yeah. Mailed it, TV lady. So then we have like a montage. Some of the ladies are Jetsky and Kevin Slesing-Unions.

And then we see all the women after their water toys and everything, they're now hanging out and Kate's just serving drinks and stuff. That's like awkward and silent. And she just just, Kate has the most Kate face on. Like, I'm just gonna be very quiet. I'm gonna put a glass on here. A glass on here and if someone speaks to me, I will probably just leave the boat right away. That's like pouring. And so Jamal's like, there's some interesting service issues.

One of her friends is like, well, that's a nice way to put it. Yeah. And she's like, it's just a coolness. Like interact with us. What the hell? Like, okay, Nager Waiters, not entertaining enough. Listen, I hate a waiter that leans on your table

and says, how are we doing? Now, I guess who is that kind of waiter? I was for very long time. And I was always so jealous of waiters like Kate, who were just like, here's your food. And I will still get 20%. Meanwhile, I'm back to like tap dancing doing wings. That's the sort of service we had to give it shit sandwich USA just spin off of

Fuck town neighborhood barn grill fly and fucks buying grill. All right, fly and fucks barn grill So now Jamela is very much she's very much like she's she thinks that she's gone on to Kate's nerves so So when Kate comes in she's like, oh, that's okay, we got anyone else anything in here? Yeah, maybe 30 more minutes before another cocktail. I just want to be on your schedule, you know, you have 30 more minutes. So Jamal's like, can I ask you something? You're not going to cut me out right?

If I ask you something, no, and what kind of way is that to ask somebody something? Like, you're going shopping in a store. Like, you're not going touss me out if I ask you where to find pants bigger than a waist size 38 are you? I'm like no yeah yeah get get like no no no I won't cuss you out to your face so yeah she's like we're not getting on your nerves are we and cake us no I'm so sorry you feel that way. And her voice is so high. It is in the like most classic, K-Chestane is annoyed right now, voice.

Yeah, she's like, well, it's just like this energy. And I was like, well, how did I get on her nerves? Cause it's like this energy you're giving me. And Kate goes, I feel like I'm in the twilight zone because she acts just like Dean. And then we get a clip of Dean being like god can't you're being such a bitch Yeah, which by the way was so it still bothers me that clip because it's so condescending It's because it's the same thing. It's like smile smile your girl smile

So she's like um you're in Thailand on a yacht. Look elsewhere for satisfaction besides my face Because I'm giving you resting bitch face right. Wasn't Dean the one she made the penis pillow for to yeah full circle guys. It is really full circle full cock circle. Yeah. So then let's see later on. Oh no. So they're still talking right and kids like, no sorry. Feel that way. Anything I can bring you. And she's like, well, I feel like that's a set up. We'll be able to power out. How do you, how do we make this so that you win?

Let's just, let me do whatever I, here's your free tear of me Sue. Okay. That's what I like. I like when her friend goes, hit her again with a nice nasty's Kate. Her friend is like, yeah, I get her. Kate.

And says, Jamal, it's like, I'm about to get on your nurse and cake us. Challenge accepted. Yeah, it can be arranged very easily. So then Kate, of course, goes into the galley and it's like, I'm really starting to bitching about Jamal, or maybe it's in her room, but she's basically bitching to her Riley. And she's like, I'm sorry, that woman's a fucker. I mean, she's full of shit. I mean, she takes's basically pitching to Riley. And she's like, I'm sorry that woman's a fucker. I mean, she's full of shit. I mean, she takes me out in front of all her friends and says, am I getting her nerves?

Well, you know what? You weren't until now. And now, guess what? My voice is going to be too active to hire when I'm around you. And Riley, it's like, um, are you sure that she wasn't just saying, are we being too demanding and kick us? Maybe, but she's still a cut fit miss. So dang girl. I somehow missed that. I missed that. demanding and cake as maybe but she's still a cut fit miss.

Dang girl. Did I miss that? I missed I think I was just already like under my head under a pillow because when cake gets mad it gets very scary. Gyriding. Yeah. So the girls are talking and one of them's like, you know, I've asked for hair before but a guy's never bought me hair. Another girl's like, um, you don't ask for hair. You idiot. You ask for money and then let it land where it may. Yeah.

How do you ask for hair? Ask for the money. Then you buy what you want for the money. Exactly. So then I came into its nighttime and Kate has now put on some glasses for evening service and Tanner walks by and is like, Hey, what's up? You sexy librarian. Hey, what's up, you sexy librarian? Hey.

She just gets. Thanks. I'm locked up. So Kevin is still trying to be really charming with his Kevin the musical thing. Can't with you, FF. So now he's wrapping snapper in a banana leaf. Mm-hmm. Things gonna make it ploy.

It's gonna be my man. It's gonna be mine, man. It's gonna be peanut butter and chocolate poise, just how I learned from Daddy before he left me, because I disappointed him so much. I'm sorry, Daddy. So let's see, they're getting decorated for this dinner and Kate is now telling Courtney that she hates Dramal and Simone's like, I like, I like to before, but now that she's getting on a cake skin. I love her. Yeah, Simone's having a great childhood. She's so happy. She's almost learned how to make ice coffee too. This song I didn't put grenadine in it. So, so now it's dinner time. And yeah,

Kevin's like plating some sort of mango. He's like, oh my fucking god, Mr. Mango, get on the plight. Just projecting all those childish issues onto the mango. Yeah, and the girls are playing never have I ever. Oh geez. Which by the way, I could actually, if I never had to see never have I ever played on Bravo again I'd be happy with that. I can do. Do you not like yourself? Do not like yourself. Fueler, stop licking. Stop licking. Look at that guilty face. Don't you? Mr. Mango, get on the plate, Mr. Mango, get better grades, Mr. Mango, do you better and rugby, mr. Mango do better and rugby mr. Mango. Please daddy mr. Mango Look at the face feelers giving us right now

Fueller that good you daddy. This is really like honestly like This is why crap is on demand is is really a must It's a must because if you can't sit here and see Bueller poking his little head into the frame right now He is sitting there looking at us. He's so cute. But he looks like I'm gonna sleep, but also have a guilty face. He's like, I'm gonna stare everyone. He's basically looking at the audience and saying it's because of you that I can't spend more time with Ronny. It's because of you. So Kate is like, you know, normally I wouldn't be thrilled about having a party for a guest at Saroud, but this one's all about shoving Dixon her face.

So I'm all for it. Yes. I am that cocky. That's a lot of a lot of penis puns this episode, by the way, a lot. Yeah, she's just whipping out all her puns today. Whippin' out something. So now Riley am I out? Yes, I am. So now Riley. Yeah. Yes.

Even you go on the spirit of it, Dutty. So then up meanwhile upstairs, Riley and Brian are inflating balloons because there's going to be another party in that. There's like that was the sky lounge. God, I always feel like sky lounge parties are so sad. I always get I always feel bad when people have parties up there. I just it's it's just it reminds me reminds me of being in a friend's Dan in high school.

Yes, that is what it is. Debbie Gibson or something and dancing around and eating pizza. Yeah, like when you're driving something really fun. Yeah, it does. But it's like when you're at a cabin with your friends and you've been there for days. And then someone's like tonight at 7 party in the living room. Yeah, like we've already been there for days, and then someone's like tonight at 7 party in the living room. Yeah, like we've already been together for days. Because it's like if you're, it's weird. It sort of goes back to that thing like,

let's make it organic, because if you're with a bunch of friends in a cabin and you start playing music and you get drunk and you start dancing, it's the most fun. But if there's okay, dance party in the living room at 830, it's like, it's basically like scheduling sex. Bueller is shoving his face into the cushion right now. I know. Yeah. Now he's like completely over.

He's like guilt face over pretenders like I want to go to a party. Yeah. So the ladies enjoy their meal. We're on. And there's the chocolate peanut butter pies a big hit daddy. So the ladies enjoy their meal more on it. And the chocolate peanut butter pie is a big hit daddy. Yeah, he cheated a and now they have to go get dressed for the nine days party. And of course, I love everybody's different version

of what the nineties are, you know? Yeah. Like some girls, it's a crazy party shiny outfit. And Courtney's like, look, I'm wearing mom jeans. Yeah. I love the 90s. I mean, space curls, some gachi. I mean, I wouldn't really know, excessive, but I love it. I also, for some reason, took a lot of joy out of, um, there was a balloon that Riley

was trying to blow up. And then something happened, something went dreadfully wrong and it deflated all in her face. And I'd never been more terrified for a balloon. something happened, something went dreadfully wrong and it deflated all in her face and she I'd never been more terrified for a balloon. I was like, oh, you don't just deflate in Riley's face like that. Who else was blowing up a balloon? She was facing it. Was it Tanner Brian? Brian. They're just staring at each other and it just cuts back to each of their faces staring at each other deadpan while they blow up these balloons hating each other's guts. Yeah, pretty much. So yeah, so they're having their 90s bachelor at party and everything. And then Jamel is like, hey guys, guys, guys, guys, guys, guys, since Kate is here, I just want to pause everything and do a quick two minute rant about Kate. Is that okay?

I don't, don't do this, Jamel. Jamel, now Jamel Hill, she has tangled with the president of the United States actually That's why she's a former ESPN commentator because she she tweeted some stuff about Trump and the guy became a whole thing And he was calling a real fire. Yeah, the whole thing. I was trying to remember. I was like, why do I know Jamel Hill? It was a whole thing where she will look at that. I'm automatically back on her side. You see how it goes? She's a lot of more white supremacists and And then she basically got in trouble and then she had to be like those are my views not ESPN's views and then Sarah Huckabee Sanders and Trump were like she should be fired and then it was a whole thing because it's like wow

If you can't say things about the presidents of first amendment violation in violation, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then I think she did it again. And either way, oh, wow. How quickly we go from being someone who just plays, never have I ever to like being a hero. That being said, that being said, it's one thing to tangle the president of America. It's another to tangle the KHS day in. And I'll tell you one thing. It's gonna be much harder to do the latter. Yeah, so I was looking for something huge,

but it was, K, it's like, oh my God, now she's just looking for reasons to be mad at me. We got to commercial. And then we come back and she's like, just wanted to say sorry, K, because I think earlier you got the wrong impression of us and I judge you prematurely and I'm sorry I was like what the hell kind of show is this get off the boat? This is the pen ultimate episode lady

Yeah, I mean, I Jamel I never would have thought Jamel Hill would be so um Like in need of Validation from Kate, you know, that's what this whole episode's been like do you like me Kate? Do you like me Kate? I'm sorry. Did I say something that made me, Kate? Do you like me, Kate? I'm sorry. Did I say something that made you mad, Kate? I'm sorry. Well, basically Kate puts it perfectly, right?

She's like, I love an apology. You know, I get called a bitch, but a bitch recognizes a bitch. And so I think there's a little respect happening. It's true. It's true. So then they do a toast for being toast to keep, for not being a bitch back to a bitch. And someone like that, I wrote down a,

I wrote down toast to keep for not being a bitch back to a bitch and then Jamel for being one. I think is that what they said? I'm just saying not being a bitch. They all cheer. That's what I wrote. Yeah. Yeah.

So Courtney's like, cheer, apologize and cake is yes, dramatically. And then downstairs Kate is like, I mean, I've talked so much to you about you, but it's fine. It's fine. She just sort of say behind her back like whoops. Yeah. And then everybody's going to bed. And one of the guests takes a humongous bowl of food to bed with her. Yes So I'll be in here for the next four to now. I'm paid for this. I am eating tonight So the next morning morning couch. Oh, so all the girls are like lying on a couch and Jamal is still sleeping Yeah, and I'm gonna wake her up because they're terrified

Yeah, exactly still sleeping. Yeah. And I'm gonna wake her up because they're terrified. Yeah. Exactly. And then so now the brews are talking and Brian's like, less for day brew. And Tanner goes, he's basically like, yeah, I'm hoping I can still bang kickly the tonight. You know what I'm saying? I'm like, please, please make a stop. I'm not kidding. So Ashton and Riley are talking and well, they're working and Ashton goes all right You want you to drop the hook and she is Okay, today start walking she's like, um, you want me to never mind. What never mind? What They're like in a very...

lame version of Remains of the Day, you know? It's just like... I'm sorry, oh, you know, Remains of the Day was an entire movie of Emma Thompson and Anthony Hopkins accidentally about to say things and then not. I'm just gonna say, yes, I mean, yes, nothing. Oh, okay, I'm sorry, I have to go here, yes, okay. Sorry. Except there's more romantic than sorry. I should go here. Yes. Okay. Sorry. Except there's more romantic than this every Emma Thompson movie ever

I just can't remember that movie had a scene where they're like, oh look. There's a bird like that like they opened up a Fireplace and birds flew out of it and they're like, oh birds were using that look at that metaphors I couldn't make it through her mains of the day. I'm sorry. That was just that was too hard for me. I tried. I like Riley, the Riley of me. Cause this is funny. I look at the park of every time you tell Riley like, okay, Riley, open the window. Should we?

Okay. I'm going to open the window. Do you want me to do it like a quarter of the way? Cause that's how we're supposed to do it, right? And so she does it every single time she has something to say after, which in her mind maybe is just like, okay, I'm going to follow it up with. I'm covering my pants. Whatever, you know, who knows, but she does it every time.

So watching her catch herself and being like, never mind. I like I was like, I think in that now, you know, I like the idea of Riley's of the day. I like the idea of her being in a British drama a quaint merchant ivory drama I was like, you know she encounters Anthony Hopkins and he's like, oh, I'm so sorry. What was that? What was that? Why are you looking away? Why are you looking? Why are you bringing that over there? I just said I'm sorry. You should be sorry fucking Anthony Hopkins motherfucker. You want to fucking piece of me? You old sack of raisins, shit. Hey, there's some pages pigeons in that fireplace you can get them out of there, huh? No fine

Well have fun opening up that fireplace later and watch the pigeons fly out. Okay have fun. I Don't know if that actually happened of the pigeons flew out, but in my mind pigeons flew out of a fire I didn't make it through it. Sorry. I can't go back and watch it already and then like Talk about it now. Still haven't watched it. Don't regret it. Fuck that stupid boring movie, okay? Movies born. You know what the remains of the day are called those hours that you wait Just you can go to sleep again. Okay, it's rude the remains of the day. You are making an enemy out of my mother That's what I'm saying. I've never heard my mom So so excitedly about a movie like remains of the day to this day

That's older people love those movies because there is remains of the day There was Howard's end remember there like oh There was that big merchant ivory thing there was Howard's end. There was remains of the day There was another one and then there were the ones that were like trying to be merchandise every like Lorenzo's oil, you know, but that That wishes. I mean, look, I had to consider that one either, but at least I need that Merchandivory was class year. Yeah, Lorenzo oil Get a blotter. Yeah, I don't need to move you about something fattening, okay? Okay, so Courtney is eating in the kitchen.

Kevin's like, we're broke. And she says, it's a muffin. Duh, you made it. Remember? So he's make muffins because he's made muffins because he wants to make a big long spiral cake, like a little Debbie spiral cake. What do you, those calls it? And you roll them out like a roulette.

Okay. Like, like, like, it's like a Swiss? And you roll them out? Like a roulette. OK. Like a Swiss roll. It's like a jelly, a roulette. Well, a roulette actually may be, well, I don't know. A roulette may be more of like a meat thing when you roll meat and some, but like a jelly roll or a Swiss roll is when you roll it up with cream inside.

I think. So he's going to put that muffin on top of that to make a penis. Yes. How are we at 47 minutes? My God, it's because I keep talking about you, or that's why I scroll through this. I'm like, nothing is nothing is happening, but we're like an hour into this. And I remember. Hey, remember that movie I'm prom to.

I'm going to kill you. Chopin. It's about you. Davis and Hugh Grant and Chopin was in love Remember that? So anyway, so Kevin, yeah, so basically So now we have a new controversy So there's gonna be a beach picnic And Kevin wants to wrap all the food in the saran wrap And Kate does not want to have saran wrap because it's annoying

So she wants to put the food in the tubs And she's like, why the food in the tubs and She's like, um, why don't we do tubs not Suran rap and he thinks it's because she thinks it's not good for the environment Which is also true and he's like daddy. I mean we're killing plants. We're thinking the planet faster than just my Suran rap on things daddy And she's like, um, it's not about the planet. It's about me which goes for any scenario by the way any scenario planet. It's about me, which goes for any scenario, by the way. Any scenario. I think I've actually said that 20 times at least in my life. It's not about the planet. It's about me, right?

The original original band of up rules tagline. It's not about the planet. So she's, she's like, uh, it's about me because I'll be standing on hot sand and trying to serve 9 million things. Okay. So you want me to serve guests in this crockery? Is that what you're saying? And he's like a pirate. I don't understand, right? You've got to be sick about it, okay?

And she knows just how to get him. She goes, okay, so is this a cast role you're making? You want to serve it in a cast role dish? You're making a cast role just totally like undercutting his food. And she's, and he's getting so mad. I mean, I'm the one who's lifting it. I'm the one that's carrying it. But if this is what you want, a simple cast or role, you know, we can maybe call up some people in Iowa. Maybe they have some, you know, ideas of how you

can make it. I don't know. Little cast role. Don't pursue anyone. That would be great. Sound good to you, Kev. So she tells us, well, I have a gift of creative revenge. I only use when I am very angry. And congratulations, Kevin. You've made me very angry. You call me a dick over casserole dishes. So Riley is like, I haven't taken a break all charter. It national like every single day on this charter. I've had to do it on her terms.

Like, no, actually everybody gets a break every few hours So don't know how you're gonna deal with that but good luck, HR but then but then Ashton and Brian are gonna go handle the beach picked things so Tanner and Raleigh are gonna hang back so he tells Details Riley that she's gonna hang back. She's okay. Whatever. I'm good with whatever get paid to take a break all charter Fine. Oh was that was that What is oh, we I just realized was that directed towards Tanner that Tanner gets paid to take a break all charter I thought it was her saying that she's mad that she doesn't

She always has to keep working. Oh, yeah, that's what I thought she was saying to So Larry's like so many layers of just vandacity. You know, it's like who's Matt? Who's more mad that they didn't get a break? Yeah. So Kevin tells Simone, he's like, so much drama with the crew. I mean, just happily we didn't get our toes. It's the guess.

And she's like, honestly, Kate, it's the worst human being I've ever met. You know what I like? She's like, she's the worst person I've ever had to work with. She is the worst boss. She never gives me opportunities to say Simone, you're wearing a blender as a hat. Yeah. And he's like, uh, on other boats I worked with, I've worked on,

you get along with the chief scene, you make an effort to let each other shine, but she doesn't have that back. Oh, it's really sad actually really didn't you tattle tail on her on day one like I remember her Tattle telling on you as a revenge tattle tails so I'm like you complaining about her and her entire interior crew the first fucking chance you got We're in true the one Just last night who asked Tanner if Kate was being too much of a bitch for tattle to put it in her We're not. We're not. We're not. We're not. We're not. We're not.

We're not. We're not. We're not. We're not. We're not. We're not. We're not. We're not.

We're not. We're not. We're not. We're not. We're not. We're not. We're not. We're not.

We're not. We're not. We're not. We're not. We're not. We're not. We're not. Then winds up getting bitten by a colony of ants He's getting up the tent And then they just set up they just continue setting it up under a tree full of red ants and as it's like it'd be fun They'll stay in the tree. They'll fuck any idiots are you and how did those ants not attack everybody? I was waiting for an ant attack this episode didn't deliver on a few. I know the ants actually ants really do not deliver I mean also by the way Ant you know what ants love

Pick-nicks they'd love a pick-nick and you set up a picnic under fire ant headquarters Yeah, carrying like a whole you know picnic basket That just shows what assholes these guys are down, but even the fire ants were like you know what fuck it We're not going out there. We don't have to spend our time with them. Even the fire ants feel victimized by these guys. They're all saying, got it to each other. So much of Riley ants. Got it, got it, got it, got it, got it, got it, got it, got it.

So like a whole long line of got it, it's walking away from camp. So who made this knot? walking away from camp. So who made this not? So the ladies love this. Kate set up masseuses for them all. And one of the ladies goes, God, this is, it's hard to choose, which is the best meal. But I think this is my favorite one.

And Kate's like, great. Kevin will be so happy to hear that. And fortunately, no, it's a really telling. Yeah, I'll be sure to tell Kevin that you love his casserole. So then up in the up in the galley, Tanner's like, eggs are pretty gross. And Kevin goes, yeah, yeah, but they're pretty cool too. Yeah, Tanner standing there gaping with his, he's gaping and then he yawns like right

over the eggs that are being mixed, which is just so gross. It's like a tenor spittle. Yeah, it's just really because you know that their spittle just falling into that egg batter. Yeah. So yeah, so so Kevin is like making his, his making his penis cake, he's made, he's rolling it up and everything. He's really struggling and stuff.

And then the guests come back onto the boat. And, uh, and then there guests come back onto the boat and And then there's still continued coldness between Courtney and Brian and they're like they're sitting together and Courtney is like, I'm brand I watched your shirt. So it's hanging the laundry room But do know that it is not I earned because I still do not understand how to do that and on top of that I hate it anyway So enjoy your wrinkly shirt. Did I think it is like thank you? Oh My hand I'm on those how Michael Brian you Just stick your fork into your knee by accident. Yes, I did why I thought it was a pork chop

So Kevin is like a guy on a dinner And she's like I um, say it. Say what you need me to do. You want me to spatula chocolate all over your huge car. Say it. But. So it's with the cast rolls done. Oh, no, you're not making a cast roll.

Not sexual, not sexual. Oh, big boy. Yeah, make me a terrible meal in a glass. It's, yeah, it doesn't never the same ring to it really does it Should I tell the guests that you'll be making a seven layer dip? Is that what you would want me doing? No, okay? So let's see Raviole and Wagyu Stug and then his huge dick So the captain puts on his finest blue floral shirt

He's probably a little bit more than you're all yeah, it's classic That's a classic captain late the blue floral. I was either the blue floral or the orange and vermillion one by said blue floral today So lots of small talk over this over this dinner while Kevin is working on a gigantic chocolate cock It's like it looks cake very real hair. What is that pink hair? It's like it looks cake very real hair. What is that pink hair? They were bothering me like up into that point. I was like, you know what? This is I mean, it's a peanut. This is actually a really good penis cake Like it really looks like a penis and they put little balls But then you put it looked like actual

Fabric or yarn and it was not like it. You know, like this should have been like a cotton candy moment or Spun sugar, maybe spun sugar to make the pubes. But honestly, why are you giving these ladies an unshaved and ungroomed penis cake? Uh, really, really gross. Um, I wasn't sure what that hair was, but it was disgusting. Yeah. So, the cake is almost done and Kevin, Kevin's like, I'm going to make the best goat man cake. I can't.

Cork, Cork cake. And then Jamal. Jamal's eyes are closing. And she's like, I got to go to bed. And her friends like, can you get through dessert? And she's like, no. And K. This is perfect.

Kevin put a lot of effort into this cake. And Jamal's going to bed. And he's been addicted to me all season. And yeah, maybe I did act like a like a bitch because what I am a bitch I just been hiding it But neither welcome the bitch and there's no going back So what is this whole controversy? I don't get it Contra well, I don't know what the controversy is but basically how is she being a bitch that Jamal went to bed before the cake came out?

I don't think anyone was saying that well, I think that she's based I don't think anyone's saying she's a bitch because Jamal went to bed, but I think that basically The thing is the penis cake was made for Jamal because she's getting married and so that was the whole point of it and since she's going to bed It's then just a way to avoid Kevin not to bring out the cake until I don't think Kate was under any obligation The cake was being made and and Jamel did technically say that she's taking a nap But either way Captain Lee is so be it over at the table the guests are asking Captain Lee some questions about retiring

And they're having like a serious conversation and he's there He's saying things like you know, I'd like to do something that where I can help take care of kids And I've been doing a lot of work for charity and, you know, doing something useful with your life will keep you alive a lot longer. And that's why the most meaningful thing you can do. And then like, penis just like Kevin brings in a penis with a sparkler sticking out of the tip, which actually kind of grossed me out. And when the little ladies is like, wow, we were having such a grown up conversation and then a dick. So thanks for that. And he's just really awkward. Kevin's like, uh, uh,

Mr. Mal, Mr. Mal, penis for daddy, penis for daddy. And Kate says, She's such a bitch. Captain Lee looks at those penis and goes, I'm not taking it, but. Wow, that brings us to the end. To the end of the big fight of the season, of the end of the season is Kate not warning Kevin that a guest went to bed. I know, it brings a penis cake outside.

Oh wow, well, I'm excited to see what happens in this, in the finale next week and I'm really excited for the reunion which apparently is happening. We had like an actual actual confirmation about that. What's happening? Yeah, reunion's happening. Okay, good. For sure. I think everyone's talking about it.

I mean, Leslie Jones was on Jimmy Fallon talking about it. Everyone is buzzing about the season in a way where like pitch forks are out. And like we need to hear this is Andy Cohen's moment. And I'm sure he will. Did you see him? Did you see him on Instagram live with Tamara last night? No, I did not. What happened?

He was doing an Instagram live Keeps doing this touching his face like this like his hand is over his backwards Tamara videoed in you know where it says someone would like to join and it was Tamara and camera videoed in, you know where it says someone would like to join and it was Tamra and she's like, whatever, it just got fired by Andy Cohen. So been a great day for me. And he says, this is the second time recently that I remember him saying this. He's like, well, it did make you very, very rich. That kind of thing is bad to say. But anyway, it's somewhere flooding around there. If you guys haven't watched it.

I mean, it's pretty standard boring Andy, but on Instagram. But I'm actually a little surprised. If it's true that Tamer was fired, I'm a little surprised that she was fired because, I mean, we all can't stand her, but she's kind of a great villain. I just don't, I don't, I don't, I'm just surprised that they would get rid of a, like a, a top-tier villain. I have, I always imagine, get rid of the people that are forgettable that aren't interesting and people like, oh, she was so toxic. I think that she was driven a normal level of toxicity. Oh, I thought, I was happy, I was happy to see her back as a villain for us all to get angry at.

Like, that was, I was, I'm a little shocked. Oh, she's sex. I'm glad she's gone. But she I think it was over many because she said probably she said, yeah, I he said you're very expensive. She's oh, yeah, I am very expensive. That's why he fired me. So she made it sound like she was asking for she was trying to hold out and contract negotiations and they finally were like, nope. And they offered her a painting. According to Dave Quinn over at people, actually according to her, talking to Dave Quinn, she said that she was offered three episodes to tie it up and then said no, fuck you.

Yeah, although I'm glad to see Tamer gone hater. But Emily and I mean, a lift Kelly says she'll be fun. But like Emily and I mean, I love Cali. So she'll be fun, but like Emily and who else? Well, I'll chat and... I mean, there's just seems like an odd, it just seems like an odd group to be left with. I think... Yeah, I guess they're probably the producers also,

you know, the Trace Amiga's thing, you know, it's, maybe the producers were getting sick of the same Trace Amiga stuff, but I don't know. I think a great show needs a great villain. I'm sorry. And even as the testable as Tamer is, she makes a great villain. And she had not really been in villain form for a few years. And she finally was back in villain form.

So we will see, we will see. I mean, now it's on Kelly and Shannon shoulders and they are more than capable they are to my favorite housewives of all time but I know what you're saying it's fingers crossed that they can make this work because we'll find out we will find it. I don't even know Gina's rehired yet I haven't heard. Anyway the point is Bale Deck is over, okay? So thank you guys for joining us.

We'll see some of you in Austin this week. Otherwise, go get your tickets over at watchupcrapins.com for the rest of all. To them. And Vanderpump rules will be up Thursday night after we record it. So just a day later than usual. And if anyone asks, feel free to let people know. Spread the word. Yeah. And we'll talk to, uh, in Austin. Bye. Bye. and add free with Wondry Plus and Apple Podcasts.

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