Watch What Crappens - BelowDeck: Try a Little Tender Mess

Episode Date: November 25, 2020

Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watch What Crapins Add Free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chas, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Hello and welcome to Watcher Crapins, a podcast about all that crap we just love to talk about on ye old bravo. I'm Ben Mantelkerr, also of the Game Brain podcast, check that out if you like board games. Joining me is the hilarious and wonderful Ronnie Karam, what's up Ronnie? Waa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha Well, happy below deck day to you. If you are hearing the calming sounds of water flowing through the background of this podcast,

it is my fault. There is water flowing. I had to air out my room. I'm podcasting with a mask on because a cleaning lady was here and so I'm just airing out the room and so you hear it now, door fountain. So I apologize if that's distracting, but I think it's quite tranquil. It is really quite tranquil. So if I just doze off in the middle of this... I like to pretend like that water, that is the sound of us, that's like we're all on a tender together, right? And we're just going back and forth, which we're going to get. And say that in this episode of Below Deck of fucking Tender. We're on a tender, fetching shot glasses, fetching some tan lotion, all that fun stuff.

And that's just the water swirling around, making tiny little eddies around our ores. Yeah, they'll have the power. You know, the trouble with this show is feeling the stress of just having been in service for so long because when you're a waiter, any kind of service, I think we all have this in common that you have waiter nightmare dreams where you just, I had one the other day and it was so stressful and I haven't waited tables in a while and I just woke up just so sad.

And then I came to this show, it's like you have all these tables and you can't take care of anyone, but the dream just never fucking ends. I mean, it's all my longest, slinging food at people people who hate your guts and like don't give you any respect. I woke up so depressed about it and I was like, I want to get over it. It's just a dream. I just like that right now.

And then I came to watch below deck and then I just it was like that again. It was eight hours of people. Wow. There's a lot of trauma going on with you. There was a lot. I felt very traumatized coming into the show and I feel very traumatized leaving it. So thanks a lot below, Dect. Well, we just love a good trauma on Bravo. In the meantime, before we dive into this,

I wanna give a shout out. So Dominique, my boyfriend, his sister, has just started a new little business called Baked and Rapped for You. You can check them out on Instagram, Baked and Rapped for You, except the U is actually just a U. And she makes all these little kind of like butt cake things and she actually sent us some last week

and they were delicious and I'm not just saying that to be nice to Dom's sister, they were genuinely delicious. So if you are looking for some treats to go with your Thanksgiving meal or just in the holiday season, she is in the DMV area, which is like Maryland, Baltimore DC, that whole area. So go check out their Instagram

and order some sweet little cakes for her. They are a delish. I'm telling you, it certainly will be. Her, the carrot cake, the carrot pineapple was delicious. And I also really enjoyed the zucchini. Those were like my two favorites that she made. Who are I love as a zucchini bread? So, zucchini is like a little overlooked.

And, uh, it shows in wrap for you.com. Well, it's not a dot com. It's just, they're just on Instagram right now. Uh, just, well, they may have a dot com. I could be just being in the garbage. I'm taking more notes on this, on. They may have a dot com. I could be just being in the audience. I'll take you more notes on this, then I do the show. I need to know.

Just look on Instagram and then take it from there. Just message Aaron. So message Aaron from there. Tell her that crap and sent you. Yeah. Okay, cool. I will definitely be doing that to tell her a pre-thank you from me So here we are with little below deck action everybody this episode is season eight episode four and it's entitled do not

Just oh really that's what's called It is which doesn't make sense at first glance, but then you realize that that's what Shane's I Cover thing said Oh, I was like I think they could have used that for like any number of below deck episode names. Okay, I get it Well, I'll tell you who's not being disturbed or who is acting like she's not disturbed Then make a girl under the sushi because that's where we are We're at the sushi dinner with a girl just lying there there you know thinking about her job opportunities as Vicki plays in her ear. Yeah that girl just like lying there going over world history facts in her head to pass her test of uni. Hopefully uni and then Ashling Ashling is crying because she's so tired she's so tired my name is Ashling and I'm crying, I'm crying. I have no clues, I have no wonder we are.

And Fred Jask is like, well, do you want some of mine? Which is so sweet and kind of a little disgusting. It's also disgusting. I mean, I know it's clean, but it's also kind of gross. I don't care how clean it is. Get your ass crack out of my ass crack. My ass crack is from my ass crack, not from my ass crack, and you're ass crack. And Fred Jask is like, crack, not from my ass crack. And you're ass crack.

And Fred's ass is like, well, it breaks my whole heart. She's been making so hard. And she's been threatening the deep end. And now she's calling in front of her bowl. So I mean, she's probably so embarrassed. I know I was embarrassed when I crawled in front of Captain Lee about 10 minutes ago, which I'll do again shortly. I'm sure.

So Eddie is telling everyone, go to bed everybody, we gotta get up early. My head's beating. And he's so stressed out because sunshine, Shane, needs a lot more ironing out. Like you know what, stay on your deck. Don't start using ironing. Okay.

We've got enough problems with ironing on this boat, sir. There's no point in ironing the sunshine because it's just gonna shine the way it wants to, right? So he's like, yeah, my back is killing me from carrying everyone. Huh. So all the guests are drinking, they're having a great time.

And then afterwards, Dax, I think it's Dax, maybe it's Max, hard to tell, but one of them goes on to like one of the Dax and starts face-timing his mom. He's like, mom, we're eating sushi off this like naked woman. And she's like, are you wasted Max? Max, are you wasted? You're wasted, aren't you? Yeah, he's like, there's a motorized surfboard, mom.

And then we just see James trying to hit on the girls, but he doesn't know how and he's super awkward. And he just is kind of swinging his arms like he's holding traffic cones and putting them you know like three feet apart Yeah, he's worth doing like around it's a weird arm swing. It's like in karate kid too when mr. Miyagi had that little toy That would like and swing the balls back and forth. He was like doing that with his arms almost like a toddler who's bored I mean like I don't want to be here anymore Yeah, he's like So a girl is sitting with dax or max. I don't wanna be here anymore. Yeah, he's like, ah!

So a girl is sitting with Dax or Max, I don't know which one, I guess Dax. Yeah, and she's like, how's that going? And he's like, good. Everyone's just taking the sets really seriously at the moment. He's like, and then Dax goes, why is a good looking guy like you

working on a yacht like this? I was like, oh my God, is this turning into like my favorite porn? I'm already like very, very into this episode. It's a good guy like you doing here to fix my cable in the middle of the ocean. Do you know who you look like? Tom Hardy, yeah. And then, he's, Daxie's friend Chaska.

And it's like, friend Esca, that guy right there is the hottest guy here. The girl's like, I think I'm worried about my boyfriend. And he doesn't stop. He's like, yeah. So like out of all the guys, French Esca, is that your favorite? Cause he's Tom Hardy.

Hot, you're hot, bitch. And she's like, they're all my favorite. And the girlfriend's just so uncomfortable. She's like, I'm going downstairs. So then, Francesca's like upcleaning something and James's like, don't worry about that. I can finish doing that for you. She's like, no, no, no, this is my job.

She's like, no, no, I'm gonna wash, wash, wash, wash, wash, wash, wash. Watch out for my ass, I got a great ass. And then he puts his ass out in front of her and she's like, oh, yes, your tomb holiday is. And he's like smiles like he just nailed it like yeah got the flirting game down Mildy So then friend Jessica goes goes downstairs and is like getting ready for bed and starts talking to Rachel about James being such a funny character He's always prodding all the time and she's like, yeah, I've learned that people that do that. Ha ha They have sort of figured out way of not working. They just chat instead.

Yeah. Well, James needs to focus more on the job and listen to Tom Hall the ease and listen to me. But she's like so happy that she's being afforded with by the traffic. Yeah, the young sexually harassing traffic comb guy. And let's not all blame her, you know? I make fun of him a lot, but if he was ever like,

why are you know when thing are love? Or love when a man, I love when a man raises his arms to wave and the underarms jigger like an aunties. I would be like, Oh my God, I love you, Alma! Well, he sort of has a gay for a pay vibe about him, right? Like, I would not be surprised

if he showed up in gay porn. Like, I'm just doing what I want for a job. I mean, yeah, sure, you know, I have to, you know, like, I would not be surprised if he showed up in Gaporn. I'm just doing what I want for a job. I mean, yeah, sure. I have to, I have to blow 10 guys right now, but I get to go to a beather. What's the finger up me bum? Yeah, he's got two very, very solid signs of Gapher Pay,

his eyebrows. Those are definitely Gapher Pay eyebrows. And we're going to do anything for a holiday? Literally do a huge amount of manual labor just to say he was in the Caribbean. I know. I know. It would have been cheaper if you just to work somewhere for two months and keep that money and then actually go on a vacation.

I know. Like, stack another cone. So now it's the morning and Ashling feels so much better. She still needs new underwear, we'll make up a face creams, but she has a can-do attitude. I've never seen somebody on Bravo so worried about not having underwear.

Like this is the network of housewives, okay? Like you're probably the only person who has underwear in the first place to even lose. And then we get a, oh, sorry. I just want to say, I feel like Ashling is a sort of person who, like in high school, if there's some sort of group project, she shows up with a bunch of poster board and markers, right? Like she's that girl, which is by the way, not an insult at all. That's like, it's sort of like, she has that like plucky resourcefulness about her.

Yeah, but she's also like a cheerleader. But then she cries when you don't use her poster board. She's not just wanted to help the team. Yeah. Oh, well, we can use those other markers if you think they're better. Oh. And then it's not about my markers.

There was a lot of my markers. About the team's markers. She's like, this has been a long day. She's like really, really helpful in spirit. spirit but like an execution you're sort of like I like your markers. It's just not really the markers. We were like I actually got some with sparkle in them, you know And now I have to spend time Consoling you and you're the one who brought shitty markers Then we get a cute little line from Rachel. Rachel's just like a one liner.

They just cut back to her to say one little thing every five minutes. And she's like, oh, God, this looks good, but a moment of the lips forever on the hips. And then we just see Elizabeth trying to open up a fridge and she just can't do it. She's like, I know what there's a way to do this. Oh, whatever. And then Eddie goes on to the deck. And if this deck is a mess, it's a frickin' Jackson Pollock painting here, and Jackson Pollock, he's into art.

So we know what he's like. He's like art sunshine. Am I right, everyone? All right. It's an ed Harris painting out here, dad. Hey, are these onions on the wall? Oh, geez, I'm completely disappointed in James. Yeah, I was like, this is why it has to be done at night.

This is why. This is why. And then there's like a double rainbow and everyone's like, ooh, double rainbow. And Eddie goes, oh, you know what? That means right? And Francesca goes, are you going to have a good die? Right? He goes, oh, it know what that means, right? And Francesca goes, what are you going to do if he had a good die, right? He goes, oh, it means absolutely shit, nothing. Like, ooh, good, double rainbow, like, no butting. Who Eddie? You're so talkative.

And one of the girls is just walking around complaining. She's like, oh my God, it's so hard to sleep on a boat. Could you stop making the boat ride? It was's so hard to sleep on a boat. Could you stop making the boat ride? It was like so hard to sleep. Yeah, she's having a hard time. The girls did not have an easy day today. They were really struggling with the motion sickness and the food situation.

So we now have just got cleaning and cleaning and cleaning and cleaning and cleaning. And Francesca and Ashling are planning a picnic and Shane is gulping out of like a big container of like a Spacho maybe. Straight from the juice, straight from the freaking Vitamix thing or the Ninja Mix thing, Shane.

Yeah. And then we get like a baby cam shot of James in bed. Like, you have a baby and you have those little cameras on their crimps you can see what they're doing. and he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like,

he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, He's like a big gigantic baby. He is. So now they're taking breakfast orders. And this time they have learned to make suggestions. Francesca is like, well, you can have anything you like, but Rachel suggests lobster Benedict. So would you like to have a lobster Benedict? Yes. Yes. Yes. And they'll go from like, okay, you're learning. You're learning.

So of course, James needs help with the anchor. Um, so of course James needs help with the anchor. M-m-m-m-m-m-m. Um, so Eddie calls James for that anchor. He's like, could you help me with the anchor? Get down here and help me with the anchor giant baby man. He's like, oh get that in me own time. Yeah, and then Eddie's like really mad about that. The deck, how it's messy.

He's like, he's like, the bridge deck after was a fucking disaster this morning, and he's like, what was wrong with it? What was wrong with it? Did you look under the table? No. Well, that's your job. Nothing was clean there. Yeah, it was inexcusable, and this needs to be done every single time! Yeah, and he's like, oh, it just broke up. Give me a break. So then, the dudes are just fist-bumping, because they got mimosas. They're like, Whoa, bro, mimosas, yeah, bro, mimosas. And then food is served. Food is served to one of the guy guys.

That looks money. When was this shot? They say a lot of things in this. So how many years ago was this shot? Because one of the girls goes, Yeah, that's like a bomb dot call. I know. I was like, ooh, I'm gonna be outy 5,000

So then Eddie Eddie does something that's so annoying. He has like hope or so around the guests is that he wants to be like cool camp counselor So he's like, hey, how are all doing? Okay, I'm really stoked on this anchorage as you can see it is beautiful We are right along a gorgeous stretch of BH and Jetski's are going to happen. Jekuzzi, you can use it right now if you want. Yeah, I'm a cool, I'm a cool guy. He's trying to be like cool older uncle or cool older cousin or whatever. It's like, it's like Anne Borelle voice, you know, like cool camp counselor, except he hasn't started saying we yet when he means you. Yeah.

So then Elizabeth comes out with Rachel to serve and the girl's still like when is he gonna stop swing? I can't with the swing Mm-hmm, and so Rachel's like how about the Mexican food, all right Mexican food sound good Mexican foods great We're gonna do some guacamole with Tahane and then we're gonna have for dinner We're gonna have a barbecue surf and turf. Oh my god. They're gonna love it They're gonna be eating while they're in the hot tub nothing says college kid like yeah, I'm in the jacuzzi dinner Yeah, she's like really excited about this plan so

So now Captain Lee calls up Fran and Francesca and Eddie and he basically tells them that for this picnic today He wants everything in one run for the setup which is so which is adorable what an adorable request to make that will clearly not be you know come to fruition Francesca literally laughed in his face she's like okay okay captain so then Eddie, all right, who wants to do a water ski, water toy duties, jet ski, is he? Is he? You want to do jet ski duties?

And she's like, I've never been given the opportunities. No one really ever believed in me. But now here I am being offered the opportunity to do a jet ski. Now I've let my negativity fester. And if it fester's, it's gonna be an emotional season for me! Like putting out a fucking jet ski. Put out a good jet ski, okay, calm down.

Alright, calm down. So I guess, the other one, I think it's jet ski, is Captain Lee's coffee is a little too sweet. So that's something to think about. And the girl's like, it's choppy as fuck on the jet ski and they're just like going around and captain leaves watching and he's like a bunch of goddamn children that's gonna leave a mark she just fell off a little child in the water. So Rachel is... Rachel's just talking about going to the beach she's's like, yeah, going to the beach is awesome. Cause like you guys set up everything

and then I come with food and I'm like, tada tada tada tada. And then Francesca's like Elizabeth, Elizabeth Elizabeth. Could you please make a sunscreen basket and I say make a sunscreen basket. I mean, make a basket and put it on the tender. Thank you very much. I'm sure that will work out just great thank you. So Elizabeth is checking on the kids in the hot tub and one of them goes um is it possible

for the chef to make us some mac and cheese balls? No no it's not fucking possible no one just can whip up mac and cheese balls ma'amam. You have to make the mac and cheese first, and then you have to like, it's a lot. You gotta chill it. Then you gotta make the breading, then you gotta deep fry it. No, no. And on top of that, Rachel doesn't even have macaroni,

so there's that. So Elizabeth, then friend Jessica's like, oh, Elizabeth, when you get a request like that, could you run that three me two? Thank you very much. So now Elizabeth starts telling us about her insecurity. It's just like, you know what? You know, the way I was given two stripes,

it makes me wonder about like, you know, it makes me doubt the way Francesca does things, you know? And it was just a flashback of Francesca saying, you're second stew for the moment. Just don't miss out the captain's uniform. Yeah after which she went and took an app So I'm not gonna really feel for Elizabeth. No, and she's like yeah, I feel like I'm walking on eggshells It's a Yeah, so now

There's more prep work and more drinking in the hot tub and then Elizabeth We just just like all the stuff happening on the boat and then we just cut to Elizabeth like in some random corners is going Okay This job makes you like so tired and then in the hot tub one of the guys like I will never get Attached to on my ass. They're like you already have a tattoo on your ass stupid. He's like oh, yeah A left fantasy football once. Yeah, wow. Come on, shoes.

Here comes one right now. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, someday, parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful take on parenting. Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brown-Oller, we will be your resident

not-so-expert experts. Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding, and thinking, oh yeah, I have absolutely been there. We'll talk about what went right and wrong. What would we do differently? And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone.

So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. you can listen ad free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. So then then begins the then begins the one girl getting very hungry. I am literally starving. Like we have not eaten since like eight thirty in the morning. Like I'm starving. Yeah. And then her friend friends like we're really hungry like what in the world are they even doing down here starving? Oh my god, I can feel like it's fine in my stomach. I'm dying I'm gonna wait that I'm a ghost like what you're looking at right here as a ghost I'm not even a real person anymore. Okay, I've come back to land to warn you that heaven is scary because it's no food up there

and I'm starving. I'm a starving ghost. At least give me some souls to feed on, Jesus, I'm starting to. Da-da. So it's like two o'clock and there's still setting up and because like can we come down? Can we come down there? They're like very soon, like can we come down can we come down there the like very soon very soon not yet

So Eddie's like oh the guests are hungry and that's not gonna like that. We're way behind We look like amateurs that it's not good Starving Starving I'm so hungry It's like the orchestral move of the next 20 minutes Derving Derving I'm at movement. Okay, so actually I mean it's like

So ashing is like alright if you guys want to come on down The one with that the underwear moisturizer keep coming keep coming. Yeah, and then But and meanwhile Captain Lee's watching this whole thing, and he's like, he's like getting really mad, and he's like, Eddie, okay, take double traffic back. Come on, hurry up, hurry up. So of course, Eddie is that person who then takes it on everyone else's, you guys need to set up those chairs

right now, as if everyone else isn't already rushing Eddie, like calm the hell down. I'm still thinking. They get... They're mean! They get everyone to the beach and starving girls like... Oh my god, I'm stuck. You know what? I knew some fucking shots or something. I'm so excited to eat like holy shit. I'm so hungry.

You have any hours? Thank god for Instagram because that always buys them time with guests on the beach. Oh my God, they're taking some instas. Yeah, so they're doing that and you got the leads watching the binoculars going, and Elizabeth's like, the picture of Muggerita that's why I don't know sorry all right Ashling Ashling Ashling could you get the pictures in the agaradas from the galley fridge the one you know that fridge that it Elizabeth still hasn't been able to figure out I mean I it's pretty simple has a door you pull it like every other fridge but she's got two stripes how about that anyway could you get that for us please. I'm really hungry can I sit down?

Stummy! Rachel serves while Eddie goes back to get this margarita stuff so Rachel starts serving and she's super excited you know she's like Kessadilla Tani! Like you're gonna go for her whole menu and then the margaritas arrive and we cut to lazy ass day and like, I'm out of the hub in the water, so bad. Yeah, and so they have the margaritas head over, captain leaves like those jugs better be full by the time they get there. Yeah, that was just a joke. I know it's a tough time right now, but I'm still making jokes. So now he's like, I'm starving.

Oh, now I'm starving for sunscreen. I'm hot. You have sunscreen. And of course, Elizabeth did not pack that sunscreen basket. That Francesca asked for a long time ago. As the second stew, it needs to be ingrained in you. I can't think for this second and third stew. I don't want to hear where, where, when you come out of the womb.

I want to hear cleaning windows. for this second and they do. I don't wanna hear where, where have you come out of the room? I wanna hear, he he he he he, to cleaning windows or on. Ha ha ha ha. Ash, ash, ash, ash, ash, ash, Elizabeth, I was like, what you're accident of my doing right now? Ash, ash, ash, Elizabeth,

could you get some short glasses into Kila and definitely it's like, seriously, seriously. So yet another tender, but they get their shot glasses and they all do some shots. And Rachel comes up to Elizabeth who's just fucked up majorly twice in a row. And she's like, what are you doing? And Elizabeth's like, breathing for a second.

Thanks, thanks, I'm glad you're breathing. So now the kids want to go back. So it's the seventh tender trip and Captain Leasper one and this is seven trips So they come back and then James is hosing down people's feet and everything and Ashlyn can go on a break and Is he in Shane or are Pulling taking down the tent at the picnic and he's getting poked by metal things on the tent and as he goes That was one of the most painful things

I've ever experienced. Actually, no. I've been paralyzed once from the shoulder down and I couldn't move. It's like, oh, so it's between the time you got pinched by a thing out of tent and then... Well, the time was. The time was.

We're fully paralyzed. Totally the same. Yeah. And it's like, really? Were you using Deodorant with aluminum in it? She's like, well, it's like really did you were using deodorant with aluminum in it She's like well, it's like from a shoulder stand. I couldn't move I was in Croatian hospital for months What happened was my immune system got attacked and then my immune system didn't feel good so a detect manoeuvre system

And it was basically auto immune disease and so I had to relate to walk from that But you know well, I'll just I don't like feeling that equate. Full and Gasey prognore. Can we do this in just a quick finish this interview in just a moment? That's like, by the way, one of my biggest fears, I've been having many fears by getting Guillaume Barra syndrome is like that really terrifies me. I hope that never happens to me. Not God would. Oh, that's a good ignorance is bliss, guys. Ignorance is bliss. When you don't know what anything is, you can't be afraid of it. That's true.

That's true. So now Eddie is sitting down for the first time all day. He hasn't even had time to take a piss and Eddie, Eddie, Lee, Eddie, Lee. God damn it. Wheelhouse. So Eddie goes up to the wheelhouse and comes like, well, today was an unusual day.

Really sweet coffee. Shit went haywire. Girl fell on her face and ocean. That was pretty good. Got admitted. All right. Well, the interior crew seems like an old man's diaper after a jealous party at a roller coaster park. So what do you have to say about that? You're like, well, there was a lack of communication and Francesco is taking a large role with the responsibility and she seems pretty stressed. Also, I did a pretty sweet camp counselor thing this morning where I was like, we have this awesome anchorage and you're gonna go to the jacuzzi's, we have a great time and relay races afterwards. Yeah, and then when I got back on the tender with everybody, they said, how are you doing, Eddie? And I said, just try not to wreck the fucking boat, brah! I'm not a fucking boat brah bra So

Yeah, these these like I'm not sure that the issues going on here have to do with the crew getting to know each other I mean how am I how hard is it to put something in a basket a goddamn basket? Am I right they know bad are they're just not doing it, but trust me They will mandatory basket training tomorrow five baskets lined up like, God damn basket, am I right? They know better and they're just not doing it, but trust me, they will. Mandatory basket training tomorrow. Five baskets lined up. They want us to open them and close them for 25 minutes straight.

Hello, cut to the guests in the hot tub. And one of them has a rubber duckie on a fork. And he's like, guys, meet the rubber duckie. It's Cassie's a rubber duckie. Cross the hard Cassie. It's like, God, don't bully the poor rubber duck. It's Kathy's the rubber duck. Cross-eyed Kathy. It's like, God, don't bully the poor rubber duck. I know, but I did like that they named it appropriately. Kathy. I like that there was a duck named Kathy. And we know we're in trouble with plot points because whenever a below deck is feeling boring, which let's face it, they do an interior fridge shot.

Listen guys, the season is kind of tanking so far, can we please get a camera inside the refrigerator? Yeah, okay. It's like a sunny decommershaw. You know, where's the purple stuff? So, Izzy is hanging out with James and she's like, oh, I could use something stiff right now. And then he makes some sort of joke about like, you know, boners or whatever.

And she's like, show the hint. Yeah, is that a hint? And she's just, shut up. You can keep your stiff in the bottom bunk and poke Francesca in the back, but he's like, actually, I'd love to do that. Oh, so I kind of think you'd poke anything with it. You're just like that.

You want to poke anything. He's like, that's nonsense. Would you poke sunshine? And he's like, man, feel bad afterwards. I'd probably pop his hip out of place. I'm telling you, there's a gay for gay for pay vibe. And I'm totally into it. Yeah. We're just gay for play, you know? Yeah. Yeah. So girls downstairs at the table, they're like, you know what? We wanted do tonight, Francesca. We are Elizabeth. We have really wanted to like get dressed up and like look at it, sit

at a table. She's like, wow, guys, sit down. That's great. Yeah, this is a dare to dream. But no one tells Rachel and so she still has her barbecue fantasy going on. So she's barbecuing and she's trying to ask questions. No one's answering them and she finds out that they're not planning to eat her barbecue in the pool as she like thought all the fun kids wanted to do. So now she has to change it all and she's like really mad because no one told her and now she has to go down the kitchen and restage everything and heat things up and she's like there's now a communication and this is fucked Yeah, she's like

Intercutting between her getting like super mad and then getting more mad and then getting more mad after one of the girls coming out of the bathroom going So So then the crew's getting to blacks and Eddie pulls Izzy to the side. He's like, he's like, Izzy I really like that you told me you were unsure today about the Jetskies like that's awesome You're honest and you should know that you should be more confident, okay? Because you're great. I mean Well, I mean look we got James and we got Shane here So like it doesn't take much to be great on this crew, but you're doing it. Okay. You're doing it We got Shane here so like it doesn't take much to be great on this crew, but you're doing it. Okay, you're doing it

Yeah, you've got the biggest license of any other tech can I mean come on have some confident She's like well, I just need to basically get into my groove because when I get in my groove I still move slowly, but what I do is I'll move slowly slowly And he's like well just let your confidence guys y'all right now let's high five and she's like Yeah, very slow. She's like the biggest wet noodle high five ever. He's like that was a terrible high five So now it's time for prepping and cleaning and prepping and cleaning and James socks get wet Mm-hmm Jello shots cleaning That deck better respond with today James under that table He's like chill out thanks mom

Yeah, and then they serve the food it's some roasted broccoli with some baked apple and pie met People the kids love it. They think this awesome the best loves to ever the taking photos and everything and it's just like It's a great night for all sorts of people who this the one kids like this the best lobster ever, they're taking photos and everything. And it's just like, it's a great night for all sorts of people. This one kid's like, this is the best day ever. And around midnight, the kids are finishing dinner. And then, like they go to sleep at 1 a.m. And there's just more cleaning. And James is cleaning under the table and dreaming.

And Francesca's cleaning. It's 1.30 in the morning. And Francesca's tired. And now it's the morning, time for some muffins and the biggest villain on this show, the juicer. So Ashley is messing up the juice. She's like, oh, I don't have any underwear. So what time is breakfast? What time is the after party? When are we going to eat? When are we going to party, the guest? And then Shane is trying to lift something out of a hole. It's like a cable, it's like a rope. He's like pulling up a rope and it's like,

heavy, and then Eddie pops out of like the hole. He's like, come on, strong guy. And he yanks it up. And he's like, you need to eat some more. We need his boy. And I was like, ew, please don't ever do that again. I don't like that. I didn't like the all sorts of that. It's also so kind of sending. He's such a prick. Fuck off. James told them fuck off. And Shane told them. Yeah. And then James is like, do how do I wake myself up? Slap the space. He's like, hey, that hurt. Yeah, stupid. So, so then it's breakfast and everyone's doing duck confi with waffles and, um, and Eddie tells James that he appreciates his effort last night for cleaning under the table for once and then it girl goes, is this a cum-quat? Another girl goes, it might be, which I don't know why that was so amusing.

Um, so what, oh, appreciate the effort bra But I'm dying Sorry, I choked oh, I thought that was Rachel others that there's a About like Yeah, I'm still alive Unfortunately, I'm still here. So then bye everybody Leave leave now children. Yes, and so he's like guys thanks max. I was like thanks guys like this is so fun Like that girl was starving and like really good like rocking. I'm so starving The only thing that was like less than ideal was the time to take it to get to the beach because that we really wanted to go on the beach

And also I caught ducks jerking off to Tom Holland or videos not really sure if that's anyone's fault But that wasn't fun. But otherwise we had fun. So thanks guys. Thanks mr. Lee. Yeah So they all do some cleaning and then they go down time for the tip meeting Captain Lee's like well Charter 2 is in the books. We didn't do as well as some. Everybody needs to step up their game because Francesca and Eddie are carrying most of the heavy workload. So if people don't start stepping up to the plate, we will make changes and it starts

with baskets. How do you open them? How do you close them? What do you put inside them? Seminar 3 PM today. Be there or be square like a basket. Get the job done and you'll be replaced, proactive, not reactive, festive, not rastive. All right, guys, now they left us a grand a piece and I think we dodged a bullet with that one, honestly.

And that's like a bad tip. That's a good tip to them, right? That's a really bad tip. I'm sure they'll be bad. I sure they'll be bad. I sure's like a bad tip. That's a good recipe. But I mean, did anyone really think the kids were gonna tip? Well, they don't even know what I didn't even understand good tipping until I was probably, you know, 27 or so. Well, if they're parents, it's not the kids, it's the parents. Like if their parents can afford to send them on a yacht, they can afford to tip. Yeah, you know, that's true too. She's raised your children America. So yeah, James is like, that's a shit tip.

They've got money spread around a little bit. Well, anyone have something to say to me? Cause now's the time to bitch and complain. Anyone I'm open. Look at me. Look how open and and receiving I look right now. Look at it. Look at it. Look at it. Look at it. Okay, it's over now. I know. Speaking goodbye. Rachel, are you sure? I see your lips sort of like it looks like you're mouthing something, but you're not seeing anything. Are you? Yeah, there's now you're frowning and now you're you're crying and frowning. Are you sure there's nothing in your mind? Now's the time to say it, Rachel. Okay, you're now you're squeezing the table. Very hard. Rachel. Rachel, oh, there's a

little ball of poop that just rolled over me Rachel did this come out of you Come on Rachel anything to say at all Rachel She is gonna kill Francesca and she's like but I'm gonna get rid of the benefit of it out because she is my eyes and ears And I don't want to burn that bridge just yet So big news. Ashlings seat cases here. So uh, that means she finally has clean on the way, uh, and clean clothes. And she's reunited with her face creams and a fake tan on shampoo, but the fake tan on shampoo, going everywhere, it's positively mad.

And then Shane starts wrapping the eddy, he's He's like, hey, just let it be. Hey, it's just you and me. And he's like, just shut up. That's terrible. Do chain stop, stop with your callie. Okay. You are no callie, sir. Just cut it out. He is no callie. That is for sure. But Eddie is a dick. And so it it annoys Eddie and so I fully support his artistic expression right now. So he goes into bitch to Francesca and they bitch about how their staff sucks basically. He complains about Shane sucking and she complains about Elizabeth sucking and he's like, oh my god, I would lose my mind doing your job and she just laughs. And then your job and she just laughs. And then dressing. I wrote dressing discovery. That was a very important plot point. Grab that got that down. They were going through a bunch of things like

this is blue cheese dressing. Or right now let's look over here. This looks like a bowl of somaic. All right. Yeah, we forget that out. So now they're going out and they're all dressed up and they're making funny faces in the van, doing a whole thing, and then they get to the restaurant. And I don't know if you noticed this. I never knew, this is, I think it will not be written in a lot of textbooks, but it should be. Apparently, before she passed away,

Ruth Bader Ginsburg was also a waitress at this restaurant in Antigua. Did you know that? I was so surprised. I didn't even notice that. I had no idea that Ruth Bader Ginsburg was a waitress in the Caribbean. That was an amazing discovery. She's taking your order and you're like, do you want help?

Let me just help you Ruth. Just please last a little longer Ruth. Please, I'll deliver all of your tables. You're like, I think I would like a Caesar salad She's like I just sent She writes like I'm all the sudden like your menu choice is like written up in some some journal by Ruth Baerken's bird about why I was a terrible choice Yeah, I'm like eight pages somewhat in asshole. You were as a guy like this. Yeah, I'm like eight pages on what an asshole you were as a guest. So is he because I'm calm and Rachel's like, what's a NERPEL? And she's like, NEPLAS, I have cold

NEPLAS. And Rachel's like, oh, this cast doesn't really like each other. She just kind of looks around like, why do I have to sit next to the cold NERPEL girl? I know. So I feel like Rachel can't stand any of them to be honest. I feel like she's like who are these people? So um Uh, James is like oh feel like we're the youngest people here in this restaurant, but for years for years and actually it's like Wait a second. How old are you? She's like 26. She's like oh, I'm 24 and then we get like a little insight into Ashling, which is I've always had a little bit of a volume of level of maturity Like okay great great Let's do seem older yeah, I was kind of an odd story thing

We got to give the girl something she got her underwear back. Yeah, so Shane's like guys Have you heard this riddle? Okay, let me do it for you. A god walks into a bar and says nice, haaaaaaah! And then does like a circle around his head. He's like nice, haaaaaaah! I didn't get it. Tips is haaaaaaah! Thank god.

I was haaaaaaah! You know, I didn't get it. No one got it. They all just stared at him like, what the fuck dude? And Ashlings like, well, for a lady who's wearing underwear currently, I can say with confidence, he's on a different level. Plus, it's a little hot.

So then they go to the bar and there's a sign that says, hippies use this door. Hey, sunshine, that's you. And then Shane's like talking to Eddie about like breaks, like he wants to know that different, he wants like learn these bell breaks or whatever. Breaks or breaks or who knows what. He wants to do anchor watch.

So he's asking like the pinch, the clunch, the blah, blah, blah. And then he's like, wow, here you go sunshine. Sit on my lap. Let me teach you a lesson, all right? So he starts talking about all the kinds of breaks and James, like, it's work outside work. I mean, listen, I could show you drinking games on the boat. You know, we can't just mix everything together like this, all right? I mean, she's all have so much fun that we will get waking up by the captain's horn. And Francesca's like the door and he's like the horn.

And as she is like, what was that? The corn, corn. Does the captain have corn? Do we have to clear the corn out of the captain's quarters? Horn. So then he turns to Rachel and he's like, has anyone complimented your leather pumps yet? Or can I be the first?

And she's like, what? Has anyone complimented your leather pumps yet? Or may I be the first and she's like, wha? Has anyone complimented your leather pumps yet? Or may I be the first? She's like, ramp, ramps of dyes, level. One can understand me to not. Poor James. I think that James really thought he was just going to be like getting wasted every single time that night off and this crew probably because of Eddie, they just like have one drink and time that a night off. And this crew, probably because of Eddie, they just like have one drink and they go back home again. Yeah.

This crew is not built for these after party scenes. Yeah, after the charter party scenes. So back at the boat, Elizabeth is talking to James. She's making some food in the mess. And she's like, do you want to eat something? And he's like, well, I found it hard to relate to everyone. You know, I mean, no one here has fun. I I mean what's the point? What am I even doing here? I'm not here to have a stressful work in fire, man

I'm here on the holiday. I packed all my bags have the best holiday memories. We just said scotch of work Fuck all this fuck it off. I'm gonna fuck it off. I don't want maybe I could take it for a few weeks But I don't want on our could take it for a few weeks but I don't want to. And then he tells us his sob story. He's like my dad forced me to go to uni and I didn't enjoy it. I didn't like being myself and being fake. So after two weeks of uni I'll quit and I feel the same way now. It's depressing.

I don't know if I can stew it out. MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM So now it's the morning and James is on the phone with his mom and she's like, oh I'm so happy to hear from you What's going on are you right James? He's like, yeah, yeah mom I'm all right now I'm just I'm just one of them days. I need my mom to support me because I'm very delicate mom Oh I'm just making some crotted cream to put on his trumpet and afterwards I'm going to what Lizby's talk from Wembley's stadium about the fifth term West needs to have been taking a trend and credited to for disruption James. Actually it was so funny because

they had to bleep out half of what the mom said. So's like, how you doing, mom? Say, oh, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, how about you darling? He's like, I'm just fed up. Everyone's taking everything so seriously. Love your mom. Gotta go. Yeah, yeah. Bye, mom. When he tells us, mom loves the fact that I'm in yachting. She goes out with her friends and she says, must son Scott a path now. He's got a path. He's not putting cones in a path anymore. He's actually on the path, girls. So now he decides she's gonna stay.

His mom basically is Brenda Blathen from Secret and Lys. Like we joke about it a few weeks ago, but his mom is that like, Oh James, he's saving the world. He sees everything, the how. She just goes to town says that at the pub. He's not just a traffic controller, he's the traffic now. He's gone to all the places. He's so many important people. He says when he comes back, he's gonna have a big gift for mum. It's a baby. So James decided after that really inspiring conversation with his mum, he's gonna stay on the boat.

And so she's like, oh, weren't you saying you were gonna leave right? He's like, well, I was quite fed up because people just take it seriously. And is he's like, it's your commat, commat, mess shoes. Yeah, he's like, maybe. And then she's like, well, I'm not gonna let you give up. I'm not gonna let you pull the plug to early, bro. You're in it. Yeah. And then we get a scene of a little bit trying to figure out how to iron the captain's pants again she still

can't do it and Rachel comes in saying what are you ironing pants this is more exciting than enchiladas with Tahani okay I'm gonna show you how to do it I was an ROTC okay these are called railroad tracks, okay? Now adjust, adjust, don't apply pressure, work it through softly, let the fabric move under you and look, can you feel the fabric? Yes, probably, yes, sir, yes, you're doing it for me and boom! That until I just became a kiss of fucking teahot! Yeah, knock it out! Uh, Edel is just like, yeah, she was so nice. She taught me how to iron pants. It was just like, I felt like she's my soul system now.

Nothing like a rewind to iron to bring two people together. So then Shane and James, Shane's like, I'm thinking of an app. So he just leaves. He just takes it out. He thinks everything's done. Yeah, he tells us physically. I'm drained like a six Down sorry a six-hand a deck hand get six hours of sleep and that's like my healthy for me Because you work like 16 hours a day and then you get like nine hours of sleep and then that's

28 no way you get you work 28 no way you get you work 19 hours and then you sleep for 16 at way That's the math is hard. I'm like oh my god. Please don't let me sit here Why and watch this fucking shame trying to math? I know exactly So you finally works it out and decide that he's only getting six hours asleep That's not enough. So he goes taking that and it's like 12 15 like right in the middle day He's napping so Eddie walks into his room and just sees Shane napping and just there, so you just can't even believe this. He's like, I find you're taking a nap,

all over what else is working? Why is he sleeping? You're gonna pay the price now. Oh yeah, you're gonna pay the price now. Except he's not, he doesn't even wake him up. I know. You know, I mean, his mask does say do not disturb, and I thought, what a stupid sleeping mask.

Like, that's dumb, but it worked. Yeah. He was like, he knows rules. Well, I did do not disturb, so. It's like, damn it, I want to wake him up to express my authority, but same time, I do love following a rule. Damn it, it says do not disturb, I can't, I can't obey.

He better get down here in a mask that says, yell at me right now, because he's gonna get it. He's gonna get it. He's gonna get me right now. And that brings us to the end of a below dick, everybody. We are back tomorrow with the great British Bake-Off, the semi-finals, of stuff is happening. And then Thursday, it's Thanksgiving.

So we have have, we have all the good stuff coming later this week. We got Orange County and Salt Lake City. So we will see you there, everyone. Have a great day and happy cooking. Bye. Bye. Watch what crap ends. Would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alison King. Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney. Dana C. Dana Duh. She's not just a Sheila. She's a Daniella. Itch-Els. Let's rent some errands with Emily Eryns.

Aaron McNickles, she don't miss no trickle-less. Hava Nagila Weber. Jamie, she has no less name-y. Sip some scotch with Jessica Trotch. Jess saying, okay, higher than Hyra's. She's Lauren Perez. Megan Berg, you can't have a burger without the burger. You don't touch the Nicki Morgan lettuce.

Wednesday, your Rachel's in, the next day, you're out. He makes a squee, Ritchie D. There ain't no problem that Sarah Solvia can't solve you. The Bay Area Beaches, Beaches. And our super premium sponsors. Nancy, Season Desisto. Let's rev our pistons for Amanda and Kristen. Better than tabooly, it's Annie and Julie.

Let's give them a kiss, it's Austin and Marissa. Somebody get us 10 C C's of Betsy MD. We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva, Erica, 500 days of summers. We will, we will, Joanna Rockland, you. The incredible edible Matthewsisters. Let's go on a bender with Lauren Fender. No one makes us feel well like Megan Capciwell.

Mina Kutikuchi. Give him hell, Miss Noel. Sarah Greenwood, she only uses her power for good. And have a meal without the Emily sides! Shannon, out of a can in Anthony! Let's get Racy with Miss Daisy! Let's take off with Tamla Plane. She ain't no shrinking Violet Coo-Tar!

We love you guys! Hey Prime members, you can listen to WatcherCrapins' ad free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey.