Watch What Crappens - BelowDeckMed: New Faces, Same Honay Eyes

Episode Date: June 2, 2020

Below Deck Med is back, and there's all sorts of new faces on board: there's Kiko the goofy chef, Pete the self-proclaimed "unit," and Lara the Italian thorn in Hannah's side. We're only one episode in, and it already looks like a disaster (but in the best way). What did you think about the season premiere? See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders Cupi from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch what crap is Watch what crap is Who cares what happens when there's so much that crap is What happens

What happens What happens Watch what What happens when there's so what happens Who cares what happens Hello and welcome to Watch For Crapins, a podcast about all that crap we just love to watch on Ye old Bravo, I'm Ben Mandelker of the Real House Rosa Kitchen Island and also the Game Brain podcast. And joining me is a wonderful man who is from the Rose Prick's Bachelor Rose podcast.

It's Ronnie Karen. What's going on Ronnie? What happened? Well, welcome back everyone. We know things are very fraught out there. It's crazy. We hope everyone's staying safe. And we're hoping that we can sort of be like an hour's worth

of escape from the madness in the world. And I know that there's a lot of privilege in saying escape when some people just can't escape it. But if you can, whether, if you can just, you know, I think we all deserve an hour to make fun of people on Bravo. I think that's one thing that cuts across every race, gender, and political divide is that we all deserve to make fun of. Yeah, being able to make fun of dumbasses on Bravo. Yes. And we are being given a whole new crop

because below deck med just started its new season. It is bigger than ever. It is a glossier than ever. I mean, it is shot beautifully. Everything about, I was so excited to have the show back after a blow deck selling. God. Which was basically, I was shocked. I'm not feeling like it. But in my opinion, it was a very low rent version of the real thing.

And I'm glad to have the real thing back. So thank you, real thing. I didn't think it was a low rent version. It's just that the nature of the boat is that it just felt smaller. Even though it was a low-rent version. It's just that the nature of the boat is that it just felt smaller, even though it was taller, it felt smaller. And, you know, I think that was that, like, as a result, it sort of lacked a little bit

of some of the fun stuff that we like on these. But I actually enjoyed Bloedeck selling y'all. I don't know, I say giving it a shot. Oh, I'm glad you enjoyed it. Bloedeck med is back. And one of the things that we love about below deck med is that there's always a nice little cornucopia of accents to do.

And wow, we have even more than we ever had before. This is really, usually it's like a mixture of English and South African accents, maybe with an Australian one. Well, definitely an Australian one for him. And I'm throwing in for good measure. But now we got Italy, we got Brazil. It's just all, there's just to be so much for us to enjoy.

Yeah, you guys are going to have to suffer through a lot of bad accent limitations over the next few months. So sit tight and enjoy the tickets. Get used to it, everyone. Yeah. Just remember, those of you just joining us for the first time the show is built on terrible impersonations So don't expect any perfect

Access to come out here. That's not what we do here If we go on to Reddit and see someone say you know I went to listen to their below deck med coverage and they had the worst impersonations and they thought they were so funny I'm sorry. you've been mistaken. We know we have the worst impersonations. And we do think we're very funny. Yes. I guess we have it just right.

Never mind, we have it just right. Yeah, actually you're right, just change your tone. Okay, fuck her. Yes. You're right, embrace us for that. Don't hate us for that. You don't have to. Yeah. Well, before we get into it, let's do a couple small business shout-outs

You know along with all the other stuff going on in the world We are still under state home orders a lot of the country so we're helping out small businesses and Just shouting out the people really working their butts off there to Just shouting out the people really working their butts off there to hustle baby So this is from Jessica and She is shouting out her good friend Ashley who is a full-time caretaker for her husband who is a disabled veteran She has an Etsy called Christensen's craft. Okay, so it's like the last name Christensen. Christ, like Christ, like Jesus. And then Ensign, ENS, ENS craft.

Christensen's craft. She specializes in tumblers, straw toppers, keychains, and other really cool, custom-isable items. So check out her Etsy. Christensen's craft. And here's another Etsy thing. And by the way, all these Etsy, it's actually so impressive to see how people have like are being resourceful and crafty, etc. and taking

it to Etsy and and and making making lemonade out of lemons, a bowl of lemons of a transplant feels fridge of it, a full of lemons. This is from Tara. Tara, she says, first, I want to say your Patreon is Keping Me, Sane, and Quarantine. Thank you. And her husband always knows when she's listening to us because she's always laughing. Well, thanks, Tara. So she wants to nominate her sister-in-law. I like that. It sounds like the Hunger Games.

I nominate sister-in-law Brittany, for a small business shout-out. So Brittany and Tara are big fans, and they were gonna come to our Asbury Park show, but unfortunately, you know, coronavirus. So Brittany is eight months pregnant in New York City. Gosh, that is a man. New York City is taking it hard right now. So that is a hard place for all this. And she's hustling to make that diaper money.

And if you could share her company, she would die. She would die, okay. Her company is called out of office designs and she sells custom-beated bracelets. They're so trendy and easy to customize to express your own personal stuff. So go to Etsy.com and it's the Etsy shop is called out of office designs.

You can also find Brittany's shop on Instagram, Instagram.com slash out of office designs. Thanks, Hera and Britney. Well, okay. So here we are to below deck season five, below deck mid, specifically season five. My first note is the photography is just a stunner on this. Just so beautiful.

My God. Wow. Yeah. Actually below deck, I think across the board has excellent cinematography. I don't know if that gets recognized on reality TV with reality TV at the Emmys, but it really should be because they they is a beautiful show. I mean, it really, really is. I feel like all the below decks and survivor have the best cinematography of all reality TV. Yeah, just so pretty.

And maybe it's just being stuck in the house so much. And I'm like, wow, like drilling as I watch this. It's gorgeous. They're in Mayorka, Spain, which is actually where, um, why am I blanking on this name? You know, Master P. S.N. Uh, Jeremiah, not Jeremiah. I always want to say Jeremiah, it's not Jeremiah. It's, you know, Kate's K chest ains buddy.

Oh, yeah, the Bata. The Bata. Why am I blanking on his name? He's so loved. That's where he lives. He lives there with his man. Yeah. And so I was like, Josiah. So it's like, wow, this is so cruel to be doing a below deck med right there in Jaziah's backyard. It is not on the cast. Yeah, that's what the hell people. But here we are. We open with a one of those bravo things where it's like, here's the drama leader in the season. Rewind rewind rewind rewind. And we start with the captain and she's telling

someone it's been brought to my attention that you bought brat drugs on board don't don't don't now here's my question before we even start doesn't everybody bring drugs on board like where the hell you gonna stop and buy drugs in the middle of the ocean I mean where are you supposed to bring it of course you bring them all yeah when you're gonna send them in the mail to yourself on a boat? And then it cuts the Hannah going, oh I'm going to fucking punch the beach in a second. So good to see Hannah's in the top form.

Meal us back and she's the boss in. She's like, we have a female, we have a female boss in a female, whatever, and a female captain. You better respect that mister Yeah, well, yeah, welcome and then Sandy's like you know what Hannah? I could have fired you a long time ago. I could have fired you last year the year before but honestly

You gave me a hug and I thought that's a nice hug. Wow. She's a hugger So I kept you around but you know now, officially, I don't care. I don't care anymore, Hannah. Oh, you want to take a nap? Okay, all right, I'll take a nap. We can do a nap, we can do a nap. That's okay. And you know what to prove that I'm real tough this year? I don't fucking care, Hannah.

I don't fucking care. I was like, whoa, I don't know who you think you are, lady, but you better end that with a hug and a pat on the head. Okay. Yeah, big time. So then we go on to the yacht, and it's all quiet. are lady, but you better end that with a hug and a pat on the head. Okay. Yeah. Big time. So then we go on to the yacht and it's all quiet. And we just see Sandy.

She's got a stack of papers and she's just sort of like doing that thing where you hold them vertically and you sort of like line them up on the table. Like, okay, just me captain Sandy on a quiet yet. Just organizing papers. God, I love this fresh scent of organized papers. Yeah. I knew you were going to love that. Sandy just Santa of organized peepers. Yeah, I knew you were gonna love that Sandy just like What do you call that? It's yeah, where you it's not stacking up like where you bang them on the table to make sure that they're all straight with each other It's this thing right here. Can you hear that? Yeah?

Look at me. I'll tag me with my papers You know what I want I want five star white glove paper taging. That's what I want on this charter, okay? And then it's quiet and wind blowing. And then we see Hannah coming down the walk already the best trick she's ever is going to be my best cease never out God damn my flip flop my fucking flip flop, honey. Honey am I seriously working on a boat called the Wellington? That's a boat that's named after a piece of steak and pastry.

Am I really doing this, Hannah? Well, lovely to be here for a steak and a pastry. It's me, Hannah. She's like Mallorca. Is a stunning. The waters are second to none, Hannah. And Sandy is like, you know what? I brought Hannah back because I truly believe Hannah wants to do a good job. The waters are second to none, huh, I? And Sandy is like, you know what?

I brought Hannah back because I truly believe Hannah wants to do a good job. I mean, I don't know if she will do a good job, because first I can tell she's made a table table setting out of a out of a doily and some silverware, but she wants to do a good job. And that's what matters. You know, I had a wester doing a good job. I'm just looking at her right now, fucking with a flip flop idiot. So I guess that dream's dead. I mean, she brought, she wants to doing a good job. I'm just looking at her right now fucking with a flip flop idiot So I guess that dream's dead. I mean she brought it. She wants to be a good job But then again, she is wearing flip flops I don't know I don't know I just tapped these papers on the desk right there and oh yeah, look at them all flush all Flush and the producer asked Hannah. Do you even speak Spanish Hannah and she's like me?

I only would speak enough Spanish to say no And the producer asked Hannah, do you even speak Spanish? Hannah and she's like, meh. I don't even speak enough Spanish to say, meh. To know just just for future reference. Uh, to know. Doesn't know. So they hug and they're all happy for each other. And, uh, you know, uh, Sandy shows her that two of the new, uh, stews that are going to be on board. There's going gonna be Lara.

Lara Flumiani, she is Italian and she has done six seasons on Butts already. And then there's a girl named Jessica Moore. I feel like that's a really bad name to be here for your stew. If your last name is Moore. It's like I just want more out of you, Jessica. Come on, you have to do more, more. It's in your name.

More, get more, yeah. Yeah, you're already being ordered around all day without being named more, you know? It's like being named super sized and working at McDonald's. Yeah. So the captain's like, well, this one, Jessica Moore. This one's multiple. She doesn't have as much experience.

She's multiple, huh? I think she's also made of clay, which is nice. Yeah. So listen, Hannah, this season season I went the finest service. I want white glove White glove Hannah and table setting God being God being a gosh I'm just you know what I'm just I'm gonna try and get there. I'm just it's hard for me to get there Oh my god Sandy is still on the table setting kick. Oh God You know, I have forgotten about that for last season, how like the last

three episodes she suddenly became obsessed with table settings. I would not let it go and just became a monster about it. And I'm like, she's still on it. She is still on it. Yes, her whole thing with Hannah last year is table settings. Like everything was going great. She was getting along with Hannah great and then table setting. It just it was a nightmare. The great table setting war of 2019. So Hannah tells us yadding it. She's like yadding is not a career for me, but on passionate about doing my job. Well listen, who wants that employee? I know. I don't give a shit about this job, but I'm gonna do a good job anyway. So basically she's saying that Captain Sandy was right when she said, listen, I can see from your eyes and your shitty, shitty table scapes that

you're not passionate about this. And how do you say that? Anyway, it's not really careerfully, it's more of like a... to me it's almost like Uber, but like you never get to get off the clock. You know what I'm saying? Just doing something else. She's like, come to me this till I get knocked up. And I listen, that's like me and eating.

Okay now. I don't know that either is going to get either one of us knocked up, but okay. So then we met, we meet the chef, his name's Kiko. And he's like, and he was my full name. He's like, I'm from something like that. I'm like, whoa, what? He has like this ability to say words so quickly in such a staccato way. And the reason why I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is because I'm here is um, kick. It's like, good job. I'm going to be watching you, Kiko. I'm watching you, fresh or frozen. Okay. You know, you know, you

may have heard of Wendy's. She, she's a great, great, great, great yacht chef and always fresh never frozen. And I want, I want you to, I want you to aspire to be like her okay okay like Wendy the original firemer's market Wendy she knew what was going on okay so we see the new by the new galley is huge it has like an island in it it's like compared to like a season of below deck sailing yacht where the galley was saying dude. It feels like we're just like it just feels like we should just be wearing silk robes and yeah. I'm not like sure. The deck sailing was like well my family had this about and then we hired this dude and I started fucking

him when I was like 16 and then out here we are just putting up the sales hope it sticks together. That's what it's like welcome to our luxury yacht! I will say that one thing that was really terrible about Bapalot Dexilling yacht was having to listen to Georgia, Platt or Qatar, and sing a stupid song every episode. I was like, I love you like I do, I love you like I do I love you like I do I'm a singer song writer strumstrow Oh, I never underestimate the power to fail like Adam. Oh my god to make a shit

Oh, who thought that was a good idea. Hey, but Adam. There's a sparkling personality to anchor in new cell or never Yeah, exactly fricking Adam. He's like man I found these wild flowers in a gutter and you didn't react to them the way I wanted you to. I'm so mad, why do you have to ruin our sex? The fact that you had sex with another man in your path, fucking disgust me to my cords, disgust me to my cords! And then, like, get out of here, fam guy.

And-and, Jenna, I'd be like, uh be like Gil I just really feel like Well, I guess I'm just like I can't be affectionate with my boyfriend and the like alley anymore I just can't be like that anymore. So that's what you're saying. Apparently we can't touch each other anymore We can't touch no no Jenna you can't because you're on the clock. Okay You know, I don't really feel comfortable like working about where like emotion is like discouraged or like affection is like it discurs because like a lot's just not like how I work cuz love is like a love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and love and Oh God, I'm glad we didn't cover that show. Okay, so Hannah meets Kiko. She's like, hello. She has them around basically.

And then she sees Mila. And she's like, oh, there's a big difference between Mila and Mila. Oh, sorry. I had Mila written down because Captain was like, well, thank God Mila's not here. You know Kiko, I'm not sure if he knows the difference between fresh or frozen yet. He just keeps saying Kiks, which I'm not really sure what that is. But I do know that I'm still terrified if he knows the difference between fresh or frozen yet He just keeps saying keeks which I'm not really sure what that is But I do know that I'm still terrified of Mila. How about that? So Mollia is back and now she's a bowson and she's like, you know what?

I don't want to get into fights this year. I don't want to get into boatman says I just want to do my job So we meet we see that there's a guy named Peter who's coming on board who is who is ultimately becomes the lead deckhand. And so he's just he will be awful. And then Hannah and Malia run into each other in the hallway. And Hannah's like, well, well, well, I haven't seen you. And he is, honey, little honey, you go, well, you lead deckhand lead deck. oh Okay, basin all right all right Yeah, and Hannah, you know you know immediately that Hannah is just miserable because Hannah can't hide it because you can read her Squint like she gets that angry squint when she sees me that like her eyes are really open

But she's squinting them still and then she she grabs at her necklace. She starts twirling the necklace around. Yeah, that necklace is like the equivalent of like, holy back bro, holy back bro. Yeah, Hannah never will be a poker player for sure. She's like, well, I kind of thought I'd never see her again in my life. So, yay. Yay?

Yeah. So they're like, ball stitches, yeah, girl, but it's super really awkward. Emily is like, yeah, I liked her at first. And then all the guys fell in love with me. And basically, dot, dot, dot, dot. I was like, wow, there's a lot of that dot, dot, dot, dot, yeah. Yeah, exactly. So now this guy Pete comes on board. And he's basically like a cheesier version of Bobby. Exactly. So now this guy Pete comes on board and he's basically like a cheesier version of Bobby And he comes on he's got these huge Oakley's on and they play like rock music for him like And he goes the unit has arrived

Yes, you look at him and you know like it can't be worse than those sunglasses and the gigantic white plethora family pack He wearing, right? Like it can't, it can't get worse and then he's like, yeah, the unit is wet! Oh boy! What is the unit? Is that like vaguely looking like Roy Scheider? Is that what qualifies to be a unit? What is this? What are we talking about? I'm assuming his pain, but I'll be the judge of that. Mr. Unit. his pain but I'll be the judge of that mr. unit so Hannah sees him and she's like wow there's some sunglasses and he's like hey the unit he's like thank you I thought about wearing them behind my head like I fury but you know the unit does his own thing he's like the guy he's like the guy

from long Island he was obsessed with his mommy on this year's below deck and that he's always trying to make like little get Tanna. Jimmie Cricket. He's really trying to make the unit happen. Yeah, he really is. So Hannah's like, just get American tattooed across your forehead and let's be done with it. I'll be really disappointed of Hannah and the unit wind up making out because I feel like Hannah often won't be like, well, he ate that piss and then like in two episodes.

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So Alex meets Alex's another guy is from Boston. Yeah, and he's he meets Kiko is like what's up string bean? Look at awesome and here from Boston. I love the paths. I love Tom Brady. I love I love Chowda and I love I Love I love I love chowda and I love I love Mockets. I love a lot of them. I love a market. I love she is I love Celtics I love and then We get a little clip of Mollia meeting Pete She's like well, welcome to the boat. You know, now looking at your resume, I haven't capped into boat like you have. And he goes, I'm sure you won't

have a problem with some pointers. Yeah. Yeah. Like every, every second those guys on screen is disgusting. He's awful, awful. So then we meet the, we don't meet Lara, who comes on board and Lara's worked on 45 yachts, so she has a lot of experience, but then she tells Hannah, yes, so it was once a chief as to, and Hannah's, what are you, what are you finding a part of gold? Lara, Lara, Lara, Sabinia, Famitalia. That's how she sounds like. La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la Because that's how she sounds like to me. I'm like a 45 yards, ah! From the opposite! Don't do that! No!

So Hannah's like, so are so here that you're hoping to move up to Chief Stew. She's like, I already work as Chief Stew. So it's not moving up really. And then it's like, oh, gold, we're doing this again. And then we get clips of Bugsie. When I was cheap, Steve, I didn't even know what she's doing. I have to say that you are a terrible change to so on to Bugsie. So then this guy Rob shows up and he is like very

serious and he's serious and surprisingly he's actually British too and he is like very serious. And he's serious and surprisingly, he's actually British too. And he is, he's like, so he shows up. And then Jessica Moore, the third stew arrives and she's like, she's like, yeah, I've worked on four yachts. And I guess as evidence of her working for different yacht, they show all these selfies with her doing duck face on yachts. I've taken selfies on so many yachts so I'm ready to work. Yeah I love her because she's she reminds me of this stripper that used to be my best friend. I mean I just

loved this girl and this girl has the same exact personality. She's like yeah um I'm Jessica I've had a lot of jobs. I sold cars of Zwayress, I was a dishwasher, a bingo collar, a nanny, a real estate agent, an ecotician, a nail technician, oh, and a hoot is girl. Ah! Like enjoy that service y'all are about to get. Yeah, it's like so, you're terrible at everything you do. Like what are you, 25?

How many jobs have you been fucking fired for? I know. That's exactly what I was thinking. And I was so ready to hate her after she said that, but then I actually round up really liking her a lot. I really like her too. Yeah. So then Alex, so just Alex and Jessica run

into each other on the deck and they're like, oh, you fucking kidding me? Oh my god, bro. Oh my god, we worked together last boat. Oh my god, she's like an older sister. She's like an older sister. She's sort of like a Rob Brankowski, to my Tom Brady, you know what I'm saying?

She's like, yeah, I've had a rather good little family unit going on through someone's unit. Oh yeah! And then meanwhile, they're loading the boat up with stuff and they're like the boat up with stuff and they're like getting the provisions on and then Pete is like checking out Lara from like downstairs, he goes,

yeah, I'm ready to beat that Italian stallion. Yeah. He does this like nose breathing. You know how people are mouth-free, there's- At that. He does like, yeah, he does mouth breathing, but it's like nose breathing. I don't how it's just it's like exclusively through his nose. He's like, no, he does. He actually

has a little bit of polypounds don't in him because you know when polypounds don't tell you jokes. Show is like queues up her punch line by doing like a, yeah, like it's like a puff of air. He has surprising polypounds on qualities too. Yeah, he's's like a puff of air That's a yeah, he has surprising Paula Poundstone qualities to him. Yeah, he's so gross and at one point he's working with Alex Pete right we're talking about Pete right yeah, yeah, so Pete is with Alex at one point and Alex is so who's boasting? And he goes Malia and he goes Malia. Yeah, I'm like girls being in charge and goes, yeah, tell me what to do. So now it's time for the staff meeting. The charter's gonna be tomorrow and this is the longest boat that Captain Tanty has ever used. It's 185 feet and she's like, listen, I have a high bar and a high standard. And let's just say I've been hardened by my terrible last crew, which was run by a terrible, terrible leads do.

I'm not going to say what her name was, but let's just say she's on this boat and giving me bug eyes right now, looking ferociously at me, making a terrible, terrible table scape. Let's just say when you're faced with people who are insubordinate with people who have no motivation, it makes you a better leader. Table skates, that's what I'm saying, table skates.

This isn't either bring it home or you take it home. I don't even know what that means, but it's a play on the words bring and take. Yeah, I didn't make much sense. So she's like, your main cool is to impress me. If not, someone gets fired. God, bitch. You know what, I can't go there. Still can't go there.

Okay. And then Kiko goes, Captain makes it. He goes, Captain makes me scary. For Kiko. I love Kiko. And she's like, okay, now here's the engineers with non rhyming names who are never gonna see a game David Warren and whatever the other non rhyming. Okay, go away.

Go away, not bringing it home or taking it home or whatever I just said. So then Malia has a meeting with the Deccans. She makes Pete officially the lead Deccan and Pete is like he's like bragging about himself in this really cheesy way. He's like, I got my 23 and me test back week and blew that shit out of the water. I'm a hundred percent unit. I don't even, you think you're being hilarious but no one knows what you're talking about. It doesn't make sense.

If you're trying to be the situation because that that that that's oh that was like 10 years ago He's trying really hard to be the situation and guess what you're not 25 either So I don't know who you think you're kidding Larry from three's company, but you're not 25. Yeah, yeah Yeah, exactly So moly it goes well look here's what I will say to you. Please come to me first And then you have Pete. You know what you'd like trying to. So she sees what's coming already. Yeah.

So then Hannah has a stew meeting and she's like, this season, we're going to focus on table to call. And we're going to try that on every charter, everyone gets a fork. Every single person gets a fork, OK? I have been studying a lot of Pinterest about chiefs doing for this career that I don't give to fucks about one thing people like Time to tensils. I don't know why but we're gonna try it out, right? Spoons

There's something I want to explore and I think it's something that all I guess should have especially when you serve soup something I want to explore and I think it's something that all I guess should have, especially when we say soup. She says be creative as you can be and Laura like stabs herself in the heart and she's really honoured, you're supposed to do that when I leave the room, honoured. And Laura's like, I don't think that she has a good sense of humour. She seems quite a tete as well. So then Malia is, you know, going through the wash-jead with the guys and Pete's like, got the hose, oh Wilks, it's not working!

And then Boston's like, yeah, this what she said, eh? Yeah. And then she's like, so, you guys get girlfriends, whatever, and Pete's like, yeah, well, I don't mean to be cliche, but guess what, I'm the macho dude on Blue Deck who has an eight and a half year old kid from a one night stand. That's right. I'm filling that role. And I'm, uh, I'm 27. I'm 27. Don't let all the sun damage fool you. I'm 27. Please stop looking at me that way. I really am 27. Yes, it's true. He goes, you know, it's what happens when you know someone for a week and a sad to have a child with them I like to call it young dumb and foolish shit. Oh, I think it was full of young dumb and full of come

Gross maybe it was it was bored. I didn't even think of that. I went back I'm actually makes it wittier than I thought so good job beat. Yeah, no, I went back and it was like it wittier than I thought. So good job, Pete. Yeah, no, I went back and it was like then in a beep. So it's just such an odd stereotype for this show that they always have to have a guy who's got a kid that he's left at home. Yeah, I know. Why do we always, because that means we have to sit there and watch them face time and be like, you know, like, teary-eyed and say, you know, I'm doing this all for my kid, you know, like, I just, I've grown a lot since then. I've grown a lot and I just miss my kid sometimes. You know what? If you miss your kid, then go be with your kid. Go home. Go home. That's the guy that did for my kid was leave. Yeah. Great.

Okay. So then Hannah, um, also, by the way, don't say your young dumb and full of come to your female boss. I'll don't see that either. Oh God, that's like the least of this guy's problems. Jesus, we go through this. Oh my God, this pig. So Hannah is showing Giggly session. Oh, she's showing Giggly Jess. Jess is like, okay, I'll get it. She's like wrong cabinet. Yeah, she's showing her rid of Jess something.

And then Pete helps Malia with a chair and he goes, no, no, no, this way sweetheart. I'm like, oh, gross. And Malia is like laughing to us, but she doesn't say anything to him yet. She's like sweetheart. What? Oh, God, it should have been if man, if Riley, if Riley were the bow sun, that would have been amazing. And not your sweetheart. Okay, get it. Got it. Yeah, she would have already started this vote on fire for sure. Oh God, I miss Riley already. So, preference sheet meeting.

Yeah. I made everyone our primary. His name is Chris Harris. He sort of is like, he's like the Joe Rogan. You always want Joe Rogan to grow into after news radio. Okay, so he owns a lot of tech firms and nightclubs and his sister Jessica's coming to celebrate her birthday. So there's that. That's funny. He's basically like what Joe Rogan would be if we didn't know that Joe Rogan

was like really smart with the like the biggest podcast in the world. It's like what you'd think he would be if you had watched. Right. Suddenly season all those years. Yeah. Well, news, radio, I used to have the biggest crush on Joe Rogan and during news radio and I think he was so hot and You know Chris Chris sort of stepped in there. I feel like Chris picked up the tour to the Joe Rogan torch for me So Water toys we get to water toys because of Malia season

She's like, oh god They like to play with their water toys and the captain's like yeah as soon as I want the drop as soon as I drop the anchor I want those water toys out every time the anchor drops you got that you got that non-table skate lady got it Lara Lara Hannah Lara Hannah not quite as good as Jim Jim Hannah Biddle D it'll do Lara did you see the beer came come up for that with? Did you see that beer? And so Lara is like, Ah, one moment. So she comes up, she comes upstairs to where Hannah is

and so she starts heading upstairs and then, and meanwhile, it's like crosscut with just like some more like male condescension towards Malia with Pete going, you know, the responsibility comes when you're running a vessel That's the hard part of who asked when you run a vessel like no one asked you unit so quiet down Yeah, so the unit so Laura goes up to see Hannah and Hannah sitting there swiping on her phone going fuck my life

And there is like where's the beer? Where's the beer and Hannah goes it didn't come she is I didn't see it. That's just why I'm coming up. It's like, uh, would you look to radio? She goes about what about the beer? Well, you asked me something. She goes, I said, here's the beer. Come no, no, you said did you see the beer? Come and see you. We deliver it. So I thought you saw it and I wanted me to come up to look at it also. So we can be like, look at that. There's the beer. There's a beer on the floor. Isn't that what you call me? That's it the beer

She goes it's a sentence you can read it in both ways and Hannah just gives her that open-eyed squint Like are you fucking kid? Are you fucking me right now? She goes for okay. Yeah, she's like okay. I'm always like I am always calm Sometimes people think I'm acting superior because I'm calm No, I mean does my calmness mean I am superior. Yes, but that's not where I sounds the superior So she's like hello? Other small people anyone saw the beer in the last delivery anyone see the beer and I want to see the beer looks amazing

and Pete answers the radio he's like Laura my love it's on the aftek you're such a big you're so fucking disgusting and this show better not be another season of pure misogyny because I can't okay I I know it's like the most girl power season so far and this is how you're you better be bringing this fucking ass on to be shut down right away. I hope so. I can't take it. And Hannah just does her most Hannah I flare that she can't she's like I didn't know how much I can bulge my eyes right now, but I'll show us. I'll give it a shot. Here we go. Oh, I flare. So then cleaning cleaning cleaning washing washing cleaning is cleaning time and so Moliya tells Pete Just one thing Pete my expectation is when I need you to take over all that you know and he's like Yeah, no problem sugar tits so

And it's like all right ladies. It's how about you knock off nail and we'll finish tomorrow at seven Diddy I am and so she sends them all to sleep and then Sandy walks through and sees like things not ready yet She's like, things not ready yet. She's like, seriously? Seriously, that's also, that's also low key one of Sandy's little things. She does like a minor Kristen Doty, seriously? When she sees something, like something a random out of place. Like everything could be terrible,

but then she sees like a bag of cheetos and she's like, oh, now this isn't, this is not play upstairs. This isn't play upstairs. Yeah. So Lara is teaching Jess how to fold blankets because Jess sees like a pretty simple fold. And she's like, Oh my God, how do you do that? So she teaches her. I was always making notes. I was like, I'm going to do this. I'm going

to put a towel on my own bed and make it look like a star. Yeah. Oh, is it a sand dollar? I don't know. It was a circle of the folds, whatever it was. So just takes Rob out and they go have a cigarette together. Rob's like the real tall, almost dead one. He looks like he's in extra in Game of Thrones or he just has that like Nordic face, you know. Yeah, he could be like a wildling or he could also be like in hotel Transylvania. I'm not sure.

He could be like one of those like Frankenstein butlers, you know? So he's just like tall and morose and he has a little mustache and apparently he used to be a model but he's been now working in yachting for two years and he goes, there's more to love than what you look like. I'm like, that's the exact thing that a model would say, okay? Yeah. Gaze you didn't tell, a gaze you couldn't tell model. You have everything easy handed to you, right? Like everything is just handed over. If you look, if you're pretty, everything

is easier. Sorry. Yeah. And also, I'm not sure how much of a model he was because he's like all monol and she's like, all monol. And she's like, well, show me some pictures then. So he website his phone, and he just shows a picture. Like, it looks like it was taken out a regular phone of him just kind of standing in a street with a man bun. So I was a little confused.

And he's like, yeah, you know, all needed to step back in a valleyway. Well, it was log, you know? Now, you know, I'm yawning. She goes, you're actually quite good looking at photos. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha I think he's a real model because he has real model attitude, which is that he's like going to be moody and quiet to show that he's deeper than what people would think. When it's actually the most obvious thing that you would do if you were a mom. Yeah, when you substitute intelligence with just exhaustion. So then Laura and Pete are having like the worst flirting session of all time and she's like Have you ever had a giant little woman and he's he's like no can I please?

Oh, you might wind up in a dicked you know Like you don't bite your lip that's hot. Oh I'm gonna bite my lip. Oh, yes, I'm a lip. Oh, yes, I'm bleeding from my lip I know you like that. I'm tired of blood And cut to just going, if we had babies, they'd have blue eyes. Yeah, babies, we could have baby, they'd have blue eyes. Then we cut to Malia talking to Hannah

because they're sharing a room. Because earlier Hannah was like, well, I was going to put you with the chef, but I thought you'd have a penis. Yeah. So they're sharing a room instead. And Hannah's like, well, honey, I saw on social that you have a boyfriend. Yeah. So he's that, well, I saw him safe to all that you have for poor friend.

So he's that Kevin for ya. Yeah, Malia has a hot boyfriend who's British, which is really, I think they've been dating for a year, I don't know, but Hannah's also got a boyfriend. She's like, I went in here to Australia and I met someone and I'll see a future with him and hopefully he'll rescue me from this career that I'm totally passionate about. Please knock me up so I can get out of here. Thank you very much. So, Mulea is like, well, oh god, it's all girls.

So, girl power, this is going to be great. I do have one that might be a problem, the Pete. And Hannah's like, for me, it's the Italian. She's still looking around for the B. So next morning, 6.49 PM, I really hate the sound of alarms going off on TV. I do too. It just makes me so moody because I think of my phone alarm because I saw the same basic one, you know.

I know. It's like, you know, it's that thing where like, you could be in like a crowded room. And if you're in a restaurant, sometimes restaurants have alarms that go off. And like if a restaurant has the same alarm sound as your alarm, no matter how loud it is in that restaurant, you just hear that alarm. So, so everyone's, it's like last minute cleaning, keep going, it's cooking. And everyone's getting dressed. And then Rob goes, you know,

I was really forgetful. And William goes, really? Cause I thought they were supposed to be, and he goes, who? Who? Who? Like, God, locked right into that one, I guess. Because have you heard the rumor about being a butter?

I don't wanna spread it. Do you hear the one about the vacuum cleaner? It sucks I'll crew I'll crew to the dock I will crew to the duck got some douche bags Waking down the duck walking down the dock. All right. Here we go. It's Joe Rogan. Not quite Chris it's Joe Rogan, not quite. It's Chris. So, and here we are.

I don't know, I guess Fanny Pax are just back now because this one of the friends of the guy has like a big man purse Fanny Pax thing. It's like one of the shoulders lung Fanny Pax. Oh. Well, they are in Europe. Things are different there. Oh, so yes. So first different there. So, yeah.

So, first try, let's go. So, it's the boat tour. So, we get to see this boat and everything, and we get to see all the rooms. It's kind of funny, because the boat is so much larger than normal, longer than normal, but the rooms don't feel that much bigger. I kind of expected the rooms to be bigger and roomier, but they actually didn't feel that way to me. So, um, three stars in Yelp for me. I kind of expected the rooms to be bigger and room year, but they actually didn't feel that way to me so

Three stars and Yelp for me. I think this is gorgeous. It's a full five for me I think it's beautifully done beautifully furnished the bedrooms are just so nice. I love the headboards. It's not tacky Yeah, no, it's nice. It's it's beautiful. I just it's not it doesn't have sales on it I mean there was one but I get them all mixed up, but I feel like they're I feel like last season was nicer Even though it was smaller it was nicer. I don't know Hmm fight fight fight fight back to fight it's a fight. I'll tell you who doesn't like this boat Sandy because the wing station is inside. Oh God. It's hard to take off because I can't see shit right now Okay, gotta take it and I'll bring it and otherwise you're gonna bring it hard to take off because I can't see shit right now. Okay, got a ticket and I'll bring it And otherwise you're gonna bring it home to take it home. You know what I'm saying? God

Yeah, so she has to hang out to see where they're going and So Malia's like really more in charge than ever, right? Like she's more dependent on the boss in and so Malia is freaking out because Alex is dropping the wrong line. So I dropped a spring light. This spring light Alex is the wrong line. Oh Jesus. Yes, typical, typical, you know, docking, undocking drama. Docking drama. Yeah, exactly. So, but then, anyway, everything's fine as usual. And so Laura, Laura Hannah, Laura, Laura Hannah, can you pull for lunch plays? Kiko will be making a moukiku. He's making moukaka, moukaka, I think it's how you say Mekeka? No, there is. So this is especially this episode. It's just like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no I think so. And then his friends like make mine a space you'd like.

Alright. He's like, um, okay. I'm gonna go try and make some really mom spicy drinks. We're gonna see how that works out. Yeah. And then Laura is talking to Kiko. And she's like, so you have a boyfriend? Oh, yes, of course you do.

I am single. Yeah. I... I never once. Yeah. I... I never once got dumped. So I don't know the feeling. It's like a switch. If a man doesn't treat me like, right? I forget about him. I'm lucky. Does anyone see the beer?

Beer? Anyone? See the beer? So then, Malia, it's like, Pete, now you left the post before you're supposed to leave. We don't do that. And now it's confirmed. So gross. So then he's changing with Rob, the model, they're changing their shirts and goes, oh yes, see that dead bod coming out. I thought that was Alex. I thought that was Alex announcing that his dead bod was going to come out. It was just like a lot of bodies and shadows. So it was sort of like maybe

it's hard to tell. I thought it was Alex. I don't know. It's a lot. So then we go to Hannah and Jess are in the galley and Jess is making those spicy margaritas. And he was like, well, honey, did you ask them how they like this, awesome margaritas? And she's like, I told them I'd figure it out. And she goes, cool.

Do you know how to figure it out? She's like, that was step one. And step two is figuring out 45 what was that oh, I used to be a bingo caller sometimes if I just yell at 45 it works They didn't even have a letter of text to it so you do read that wrong as well Am I okay? She just starts pouring she just starts pouring tequila and then it goes all right, Hamini shots and she goes eight seconds. So it's two shots as shot is four seconds right? This is your logic. I'm not really sure. I'm just

asking and Jess is like. And then she brings the Margar out and he goes, whoa, you have a heavy ass pour. She's like, thank you. S37, there's no ass in Bingo. So, Moli, it's time to drop the anchor. Drop the anchor. Drop the anchor. So the anchor is dropped. And then Lara is doing the table scapes,

because Hannah basically gave that job to Lara. You know, she's like, you're doing the table scapes, sorry, you could yield that all you... Delegated. So Lara's trying to fancy it up, and Hannah's there also, she's needing your buy in there, she's like, I want to put out some seashells. Have you seen the seashells?

Anyway, because he's too simple, it's too simple! And it's like, I came all the same time as you, and I know seen the seashells? Either way, because he's too simple. It's too simple. And it's like, all right, Han-Ai, I came on the same time as you all know about the seashells as much as you do. Han-Ai. So Han-Ai's already just hates this one, man. And the guests are seated now for lunch, and they're just like sitting there waiting, and they're getting really hungry.

And Han-Ai goes down to Tau-Kiko, that the guests are ready when he is. And then he tells us some of his backstory. He's like, I worked on the built ones for the godsend of Putin. So I thought he's going to be very, very picky, right? But he loved my food and he even shook my hand. And I don't know another plate that could represent more my country like Mokeka. Mokeka. Mokeka. another plate that could represent more my country like Moqueca. I'm gonna get it.

Moqueca, the favorite favorites do of Putin's Godson. I love that backstory. Out of a show with tons of back stories, that's one of my favorite. Like this is gonna work, cause some guy who said that he was Putin's grandson, said he liked it. Was there like a big business or like some sort of like,

some sort of crazy parent trap mistake where Milla got sent to Belodak and Kiko got sent to Putin's boat? Like, what happened there? Shouldn't have been the other way around. Like, Kiko's like, all right, I am ready to show up here for I'm here for a below deck bed! Like, uh, sorry, you are on Puton Gods on boat. Okay!

I'm off with Puton Gods and it's like, all I want is natural. Why do I have to ask over and over for natural? And I want the natural the way they're supposed to be, which is cold with shredded cheese that's unmelted and chopped canned tomatoes on top. How hard is that to ask? Kiko. Yeah, so the guests are getting all pissed off that they're sitting there waiting. And what are the friends? They're like, why isn't the food here yet? And Malia meanwhiles with the guys getting putting out the water toys and they're checking a ski do and Pete goes, I checked it sweetheart. Yeah. Oh. Every time. Every time. She goes,

so you checked it, so you turned on the engine and he goes, no. And again, she tells us but not him. Don't call me sweetheart. Are you fucking kidding me? What the hell? I can't wait till she finally claps back at him. I think she's being just being nice, but she shouldn't even have to be nice, but she's being nice, and I'm ready for her to put him in his place. So now Jess and Kiko are like, they're like the guests are hungry,

and Kiko is like finishing up his stew, and then Jess is down there, and Sam is Hannah, and the galley, and then Jess is like, oh my God, so you're a chef? Like, when did you start cooking? He's like, oh well, I started in Sanca-Garini, and I was a kid and then I liked this and then I liked food. I always liked food a lot.

And Hannah is just like watching him chatter along and just staring at the plates and her eyes are just bulging and she's like, oh, no, no, no, no air, on air. He's like, I learned from the cleaner. I say, let me talk like it together. And Hannah's like, I'm gonna kill you both, on air. And she's like, could we get this together? Cause I want to go play on water toys. And he's like, sorry Hannah.

So Hannah brings it up, she's do that so then so funny this guy is so nice And so Hannah brings it up sick all right honna as he is your launch it's some Mokoko Mokoko it's soup it's soup he'll see you soon Hannah actually does a much better job at presenting her dishes this year so far at least Because she used to be like where there's some slope on a plate and I think you have it with mustard. Okay, I'll be downstairs on the telly. But this year she's like, lunch is mo- from Mochaika. World sea bass was shrimp in coconut milk. Yes, I'm making an effort. You can tell because I'm playing

with my necklace. Please enjoy this dead fish and melted vegetable broth. There we go. All right. And these guests are trying to be difficult, at least the main guy. He's one of those who's gonna try and be difficult because it's something they've never had. So they look at it like it's gross, for some all. But then when they eat it, the girls are like, well, it's good.

And the main guy's like, look, I was hungry. I eat the butthole from a skull right now. Charming. So then feel free. Don't let us stop you. Yeah, exactly. So yeah, one of them is like, didn't really like it very much because the fish was, it was too soft.

It wasn't firm, which is something gooey. gooey gooey gooey. So they were so he sort of sends it back, but, but Sandy tries it's like, this is, this is delicious. I don't know. This is delicious to me, you know? So the guests start swimming in everything and they're like on like that raft sort of float pontoon thing and Pete starts telling the main guy, starts telling Chris about how he's,

Chris asked him how long they've been yawning for and Pete's like, yeah well, I started at 15 and and then I had to finish high school. Stupid. And then I moved down to Miami and here I am. And I've been yachting ever since. I mean, this is crazy. In New York, I didn't realize we're on an island. I had to open up my Google maps and say, whoa, we're on an island.

Wait a second. We're not even in America anymore. Isn't that crazy? And Chris is like, uh, you should've stayed in high school. So then how does with Laura? And she's like, all right, nasty, huh? Now, you're early, so you'll be doing cabins. And she goes, so we start with her, this charter should be doing service. And she's like, yeah, because I understood that the one day each we switch.

And she's like, oh, yeah, that doesn't work with the way the days are structured, right? Yeah, and then Hannah gives us this Like excuse for why she's playing favorite. She's like, you know what? I need someone who's gonna be back in me up and supporting me and but potentially reading out bingo numbers Okay, and not someone who's gonna be giving me attitude okay? And then we see Jess just taking selfies on the boat. Like clearly not gonna be any help to Hannah. What's up?

Standing right at the window of the galley, and she's going, Hannah! We're trying to take a picture with Hannah and herself from outside the boat. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Clearly Hannah is punishing Lara for the beer situation. Yeah, well Lara's 2D, okay? Lara's like coming on there and throwing all kinds of attitude. So Hannah's like, fuck you. Loidy.

All right. So then Lara's talking to Hannah. We get like some clips of like the, look at the, the cruise on jet skis, huh? Mm-hmm. Yeah, it's like fun stuff. And then it's a Laura's like, Hannah, you know, when you told me that I should go to bed at midnight 30,

I'd wake up at 8.30, but it's different for bingo-caller girl. What's going on with that? And it's like, oh, no, it's like, you told me you wanted a row tight, honey. So that's why I had to wake up with an A or a, and then we see a flashback of Lauren never saying that she wants it a rotate. Yeah. And she's like, yes, but you said this charter. I never got told I was getting up at 630 and going to bed at 10 or 30. And Hannah's like, I just told you, I bulged. She's like, Oh, okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. And Hannah goes, now you know, now you know,

I'm gonna walk off where I'm going, doesn't really matter. I just have to walk off after I say that, boy. Yeah, and Laura's like, ah, yeah, try that again, bitch. So then I was like, service, all sorts of service. I just spat on my computer every one. I hope everyone appreciates that. That's what I do for this podcast.

When I say a service, I spit on my laptop. And so they're just like, there's a little Laura and Jess are like taking selfies together and bonding about how on the past post they were on, they could just do whatever they wanted to, but clearly not on this one. Yeah, and then guess what, Jess is like,

wanna take a selfie? Of course. So then the guests are napping and Hannah's talking to Jess about decorations and she's like, this is all we've got, Hannah. And she's like, yeah, it's pretty basic. Want me to wake up atal, yes, you can blame her because I can do that.

She's like, not yet, honey, I'll save that for later. Yeah. And so it's said then Laura's like setting the table and and Pete and Alex are just like spying on her and so gross. They're like fist bump and then Pete goes total unit. Yeah. He's like it's looking hot up there. Yeah. And he goes Alex is a total fucking unit. The Laura's mine. You still haven't defined for us what unit means are we talking about like piece of furniture like is this what's what's happening here? I mean it doesn't it's not like I'm the unit. He's like you're unit bro. He's like yeah

he's he's unit. She's unit. Yeah, unit. He's gonna say unit a lot. Yeah, he just found a word that he just brought onto the boat and it's just gonna try to force it on everyone. Yeah, so then the boys are folding up a slide and one of them's like, we're on a roll. They're like, that's a bad joke. They're making little piles of rocks on the tables and starfish shapes and Kiko's cooking and he's like, I describe myself as a love chef. I'm rustic. I'm here, I'm like, here's real food. Eat it.

It's food with love. Yeah. Oh, hi. Arastic. So then Hannah sends Laura downstairs to do the cabins. And Laura just hates it. She's like, you know, I feel like a third, too. After seven years, you have things that you prefer to do and things you but don't prefer to do and I don't really enjoy doing cabs anymore

You don't I like to go up to the deck and see a zabia here is the me here can I see the beer? I thought you're gonna show me the beer no no So she goes to Hannah she's do we have shammies for the shower? And Hannah's like, could you use microfiber? Just to dry at the shower? She's like, yeah, or a blade, one of those blades. And she's like, okay. Yeah, she's like, please. All angry at the suggestion of using microfiber or blade.

So then Hannah's all, Hannah, by by the way is having a great time in the gallery because Kiko is like so sweet and so nice and apparently is making delicious food and she's like it's amazing how helpful I can be when a chef isn't yelling at me isn't that funny. Sandy are you around here to say this? Look at me being helpful. Anyone? No? Yeah give him time. anyone? No? Yeah, give him time. So the guests are at the table and then let's see, the first dish is Truffle Resulta with filet mignon. And everyone really likes it except for the primary. Yeah, it shows them all partying, like having fun enjoying their food and then it keeps getting to Laura like cleaning toilets and So they're making a new steak. And meanwhile, Lara comes upstairs and she's like, I'm starving. Can I have a dinner? I'm starving. And like, yes, all right, go have some dinner. Get a more rice, Shammy girl.

And the captain tries the steak. She's like, well, this is actually delicious in Madre, at all. Which is my, so she keeps validating the chef. By the way, I also wanna point out that this guy was wearing an under armor shirt, like a collarless under armor, like a shiny t-shirt, and complaining about the steak. I'm like, I don't know. I mean, listen, everyone's entitled to complain about steak, but if you're gonna work,

don't wear an under armor shirt. I'm like, yeah, while you're eating your steak. I mean, come on, you can do better. Be better. Uh, so he likes to steak better now. Speaking of better, he's like, to can do better. Be better. So he likes to stick better now, speaking of better. He's like, to stick did better. And she's like, good job, OK, great. And then the girls who the whole time, the guest,

the sister who's worth it is, and her friend, keep making comments the whole time. They're like, yeah, we just love meat. Oh, yeah, I hope there's a lot of meat, because we love meat. And one of the one of them is like yeah When they serve dessert she's like two things I'm looking for chocolate and rich So Laura's downstairs having the longest dinner. She just sitting there just taking her time eating her food and

It's like Laura Laura Hannah Laura And it's like Laura, Laura Hino, Laura, Laura Hino, Laura, Laura Hino, and she of course, it's like another ritual on Blotac is the stew who can't figure out her radio. And she's like, what is this? How do I do this? She's like, is she calling me? I'm on two.

My can is on the wrong stage. So Hannah's like, how long does it take us to do it is to eat. So she goes to find her and she's like, Laura, if you could, can help just clean the main deck off? That would be great! And Laura's like, who the fine? Yeah, she doesn't acknowledge Hannah, she just goes upstairs.

So Hannah hates that, and so Hannah follows Laura upstairs to the table. She's Lera, Hone, Antihone, well, I'll ask you something. If you could just acknowledge me, that would be amazing. Yes, I'm doing it, I'm doing it, I'm doing it. I'm not taking the table, that's a good one, that's a good one. I'm just like, no honey, if I say something, say okay. And she goes, I don't have time. She's like, you don't have time to say okay to your chief, Steve.

She's like, no. If you're mean to me, I'm mean to your chief stew. She's like no. If he or me into me, I'll be into your back. I would start showing a little respect if I were you. Full on Hannah Oz, honey R is the whole hour. There are going to be a disaster together. I can see like a full on disaster. Yeah, so much fun. Yeah. And that's that. Yeah.

Well, thanks everyone for listening. And that's basically it. Go check out those small businesses, help them out during these crazy harsh times. Stay safe. Okay, we'll see you guys later. Bye. Bye. you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you You Hey, prime members, you can listen to Watcher Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today.

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