Watch What Crappens - BelowDeckSailing: Ailing Yacht

Episode Date: March 16, 2021

So much drama on this week's Below Deck: Sailing Yacht. First, Daisy lets everyone know there'll be hell to pay if someone uses a guest head ever again. Then a bunch of a high maintenance people come on board, leading to a very dramatic health scare that may or may not be COVID-19. Yikes! Thank goodness we have Captain Glenn around to give us suggestive hand gestures.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watch What Crapins Add Free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chas, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Hello, and welcome to Watch or Crap Inz, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to watch our crap in the podcast, but all that crap on Bravo that we just love to watch. I'm Ben Mandelker. You can catch me on the Game Brain podcast and also the Real House where there's a kitchen island.

It's a cartoon. Go check it out. Enjoying me is a wonderful person. It's Mr. Ronnie Karen. What's going on Ronnie? What happened? Hi. How are you? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. I'm not gonna lie.

I'm not gonna lie. I just ate a whole bunch of Thai food. And like immediately it's putting me into food coma. So I'm just gonna push through. I'm gonna like wake myself up. Below deck sailing out is gonna wake me up because it was actually a really good episode and really into the season so far.

Before we get into that though, tonight, tonight, tonight, we're going to be on Watch What Happens live with Andy Cohen, also with Ira Madison III and Sasha Morphaw from the Bravo Breakdown, and obviously Ira's from Keep It. So everyone check that out on Bravo. It's so cool. This is our second time being on. It was so cool that we got invited back. We were not banned from the network. So at least the first time we weren't, we'll see what happens to the second. No, but seriously, we had so much fun. So thanks to everyone at Watch Happens Live for bringing us back. And we hope you guys all watch it and enjoy it. So check it out. And there's also an after show that's's gonna be on L. Interneto, so be sure to watch that as well.

Do it, check it out. That was, um, okay. So today is Blodex sailing yacht. Now, Blodex sailing yacht, most improved show, I think of all time. Like literally, of ever, forever. Not only that, but I hated this show. I hated this show's ass, okay? I wanted this show to die.

I would dream about murdering this fucking show. And now I love it. It's hilarious, it's great, the cast is great, Glenn's great. Glenn. Works perfectly. You know, maybe you are just a slow adopter to blow deck spin-offs,

because you also hated the first season of blow deck Mediterranean as well, right? And then the second season, you came around to it. I also hated the first season of below deck Mediterranean as well, right? And then the second season, you came around to it. I also hated the first, well, not the first season, but just at the beginning, the idea of below deck. Just watching. Yeah, me too. Because I'm a service person, and I don't mean militaries, and I don't throw meaning parades or anything, but I'm a waiter, you know, so, or was for a very long time. And so this just always stressed me out, mates on a boat, et cetera. But I love both of those other shows, but this one, just the Jenna Adam of it all.

I mean, who cares? We don't need to go back into that. The point is, great show. It takes, sometimes it takes a season to find your, no pun intended, your sea legs. Because season one of Blow Deck, maybe we also had a whole different captain, so it was a different get down.

And this one also, the first season of Blow Deck selling yacht, I mean, you weren't irrational in your feelings. It was not great. It was not a great cast chemistry, very dull people. I think they got it right. They put a lot of Craven Yadis who missed the cut to be on the real world and it's working out well Yeah, that's working out well. Okay, so here we are now just see you all remember who we're talking about

Natasha Danny calling Sydney Jean-Luc Glenn Daisy and Gary, okay, those names are always written down at the beginning of notes. Yeah, yeah. I still am struggling with my Natasha Natalie issues. So I apologize again if I refer to Natasha as Natalie, I just have leftover amazing race, 20, you know, 20 issues from like the mid-arts. Well, I figured out what the song sounds like at the end, where it goes. Okay, it sounds like that song. What song is that?

That's a great question. What song is that? Oh god, you're never going to name that tune. Wait, do the tune again. Do it again. Okay, I'll do it lower so it right. Do the tune again, do it again. Okay, I'll do it lower, so everybody doesn't freak out on me. Let's take it down and off to the peg.

Yeah, I'm hit it, boys. U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U. Uh-uh. Uh-uh. Okay. Well, someone tell us in the comments if you can guess it because you don't want to mind, but I don't know what it is. Oh, so you don't, oh, I thought, oh, I thought you had the answer. No. Oh, I don't have the answer. I'm just getting closer to figuring out what this song is aping. Three blind mice, three blind mice. That's what it is.

Okay. Let's get into this. So 8 a.m. six hours before the charter, they've just partied their asses off on this, about the crew. And so it's a mess. There's liquor bottles everywhere, trash all over the place, salt,

a lot of salt on the floor. Salt, big salt issues. So everyone's like passed out. The first one to wake up is Natasha. She gets up and she sort of like goes into the kitchen, makes herself some coffee, and then just is like sitting around the crew mess. And then we go over, we sort of see a hallway camp

and we hear a flush in a guest cabin. An important point, that flush later in the episode. But we hear a flush and then we hear Sydney saying, you can't leave me here. Where's my bathing suit? And then Gary goes, we can't leave me here. Where's my bathing suit? And then Gary goes, we can't get out together. We're not, we're not, we're not, we're not.

Here we're my t-shirt. And so she goes out first wearing his t-shirt. And she's like, this is the worst walk of shame ever. I have to act like nothing happened. I mean, good morning Natasha. And Natasha just kind of looks up from her phone and then looks directly into the camera. of shame ever. I have to act like nothing happened. I mean, good morning, Natasha. And Natasha just kind of looks up from her phone and then looks directly into the camera. I'm like, yeah. You saw that, right?

It was a full on office moment. Because then two minutes later, Gary comes out and he's just wrapped in a giant towel, right? And just is like, hey, any like keeps them walking by. And then he goes into his room and Glenn is there and he's awake and Glenn's like, oh good morning. How are you? And he's like oh, we had so many laughs last night. My cheeks were hurting. Oh just good old times laugh Laugh, laugh, laugh, laugh. Yes, also fucked girl. But laugh, laugh, laugh, laugh, laugh

Oh, there's a good bunch of crew on here When we cut to, uh, Zon Luke barfing. Yeah. Lots more barf where that came from. Yeah. And then the other girls in like the room of three, they're talking in days, he's like, Oh, Jay, I was gonna begin the biggest state today.

He is drunk at the whole bottle of, he drank the whole bottle of whiskey himself. And I, he couldn't even count how many petals were in a basket. Well, they're one where they're trying to get was in the biggest state and They're all asking Sidney like hello. What did you do last night? And she's like nothing happened and this is like short the folk You hooked up with Gary just see it. Ali's like did you

just say it. Ali's like, did you? And so then Sidney tells us, she's like, yes, yes, we had sex, we hooked up. And then Daisy's like, I swear to God, I didn't realize there was a vibe between you two. It's like saying there's a basket and it's not full of any pe at all. I had no idea for not 20 Peters. And that tell me with the straight face, it didn't put your hand on his pee. And Ali is just looking totally shocked. And they're like, why are you looking totally shocked? Dom Dom, she's like, well, I didn't realize it.

It was a verb there. I guess it was there. And Daisy's like, well, I noticed that. So then they all start cleaning and they're all giggling. And John Luke still doesn't want to switch rooms, but he knows he's about to be forced into a decision. So then in the kitchen, Natasha is gossiping with Colin. And she's like, Oh, you know that Colin, you know, Colin that Ali and Gary hook

or what's his face Gary and the other lady, I wrote down the names at the beginning of the Shree Cup, hold on. Sydney and Gary, yes, they hooked up. You know that, right? And Colin's, Colin is like, I guess he's like, I don't know, or whatever. And so then Gary is talking to Colin and he's like, yeah, we pretty much cheated. We just cheated. You know, it was just not much just a cheeky little kiss. You know, I shouldn't have did it anyway. I was feeling like a dickhead this morning. It was such a dickhead, you know?

And then he tells us, yeah, we just cuddled. Yeah, she just, she, she, she may have given me a cheeky kiss. B-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b- Natasha and Ali are talking and Natasha's asking her were you surprised that it was Sydney and Ali's like That did surprise me. Yes, it did so am I the only person not surprised by the And Natasha's like yeah, never trust the quiet ones. So it's time for the preference sheet meeting Yes So the primary is doctor Nichols

But doctor Nichols and her husband couldn't make the flight. So instead, her friends are coming. It's Victoria and Ryan from New Jersey and Hannah and Andy are also coming. Um, and they want an endless flow of drinks and they're obsessed with healthy eating, and they want to be surprised by dinner and carries like, oh, so you just want to hide around the corner and go, Baaah! During dinner. surprised by dinner and carries like oh so you just want to hide around the corner go BAH! During dinner.

Hahahaha. Hahahaha. Hahahaha. Hahahaha. Oh Victoria is an integrated nutritionist whatever the fuck that means. And Ryan is a high luxury seller. It's so the beast. buy the stupid piece of jewelry anyone, anyone, uh, sparkles. And then the drama begins. A fucking crew maybe use this

head for full sake when that less gas left the chat or checked check that my head was crying There is an unspoken rule that they're not supposed to use the guest head air there Okay, this really pieces me off. This is like 45 Peters in a basket a new tell me there's only three all the crew All the crew has anyone use the day head in the main salon Radio radio easy-dais. Tell me who did it. And Collins was like, oh, well, I used it last night. So Gary just says on the radio, well, I think it was used last night. Unlike my penis, which was totally innocent,

not being touched at all, all right. And Daisy's like, can we please not use the hat? Please. That was clean and detailed, and now we have to detail it after another crew member. He's like, watch out for Daisy, bro. That was clean and detailed and now we have to detail it after another crew member So then walked out for Daisy bro. She's here for him Right, I'm already starting to brace myself for a season that is going to descend into the brew territory of below deck from two years ago Like I'm already sensing it coming like oh look at that crazy that oh crazy woman look at her crazy

So Daisy's like I mean you can tell you can tell because there was a little freaking boat on the toilet paper oh my god it's gone but maybe next time I'll pee and I'll jukezy how would you like that put a whole bunch of pee in the shape of peta breads can't spit a peta bread without pee canya oh goodness well I've got the bad news for you boss you You better check the guest toilets. It's a damn mess. Shack. Oh! Someone used the guest cabin toilets as well. Yeah, she was like, I have 100% sure.

She's like, well, they're, they're drips on the floor and the bowl is dirty and the toilet paper did not have the little sailboat that you're like, no, sailboat! They're chooked on the sailboat from the toilet paper! Oh, I'm really mad. that you're like no sir but the took down the sir but from the toilet paper oh fucking leave it over this all crew all crew to the mace so everybody has to gather and he seems like so donny detail downstairs and since yesterday it's been used there were drifts on the floor lotion in in it, hell. Who was it? Who was it, ya Peter Steeler? Ha ha. One of your slime bags was gripping on the floor.

Who was gripping on the floor and the guest hand, you never did drip on the floor and the guest said, who took down the sailboat in the toilet paper? And Sydney is just looking away, like so obviously guilty, right? I think there is like, not me. And it's like no one named. No one's gonna admit to it it's like no one named.

No one's gonna admit to it then. And nope, no one is going to admit to it. And Gary's just laughing about it in his diary room. He's like, oh, it looks like someone might have hooked up and not said anything about it. Oh, well... Well obviously if no one's gone to admit to it, there's nothing much I can do, but if you're not gonna

give a shit about my department, we're not gonna give a shit about my department We're not gonna give a shit about your department Let's see how long it takes you to get a oyster Let's see how you feel when you see some pita on your cheek So it's like well make sure it doesn't happen again because it's very disrespectful to the interior, and let's just, you know what, let's end up it in the bud before it becomes a problem. Please let this be the absolute last time.

And then Gary's like, oh, she's on a rent page, a crazy little, a crazy little summer rent page. So then we go to Danny cleaning this toilet that was used. What were they doing with this toilet? Did they poop out a week's worth of poop in the toilet? Because all we see is a disgusting poop water. It's like, did you not even flush the toilet in the kitchen? Come on guys.

Yeah, and Daisy is just so insane. She's a fucking liar. She's a fucking liar. So, Alex, Yeah, and Daisy is just so insensitive. He's a fucking liar. He's a fucking liar. So, Alex, like, you know, we all work together. You know, we can want to talk to each other, you know, whatever. I mean, I'm just playing around. I don't really care about the situation, but I,

but I will mention quite a few times that I was surprised because I thought he was dating with me, but I don't care. I don't care. We'll all say this since you've only said it with your eyes about 10 times so far. He was flirting with all the old day and I don't like to see that. And I was like, I really don't care. What are you waiting for, I'm not crying right? I don't care. So you had fanny flutters, we all know you had fanny flutters. I mean you're a bit of a four-year-old hookin' up with your decade. First day, you know all those fuckin' four-year-olds fuckin' all the time. You know, back where I'm from, you don't hook up until you're six years old. That's what I say. So, Danny calls Gary over.

Well, she's cleaning the S-Ccap and in me passes and she's like Gary let me show you something funny, okay? I'm cleaning this bed and you see where it's dirty there. That's two marks that looks like they could be And he's like no, no, no, we just we just spoke talk shit. No, know, I just passed you. That's all that happened there. That's all, she's like, um, it says cheeky little kiss in the dust. Was that you, bruvs? Um, also you guys clean that fucking guest cabin. I know.

How have there already been guest cabins in there? And there's that much dust that has not been cleaned up from the, it's like a ghost left is hand-printing there. There's so much dust. Either Gary has a lot of dandruff or that was unattended to. So please just wipe that shit down. And she's like, I should be detective

because it's very suspicious that the perp always goes back to the scene. Yeah, and then we get a close up of like the little sailboat fold on the toilet paper, which we seem to go back to like five times a set of episodes. Like, anyone does anything wrong. It's like the sailboat on the toilet paper thinks otherwise. Yeah.

I'd like to call this toilet paper sailboat to the stand. So then Gary is now dealing with JL, because JL drives Gary nuts. He's like, quick question. Did you use the doodle bag up there, which they have so many crazy terms on this boat. Doodle bag, stupid face donkey dick little 20 to it. So then it was time for provisions and Sydney's like wow look JL two bottles this time for ya He's a barst everywhere. Yeah, and then Daisy accidentally ordered 10k or 10 kilograms of carrots And then Daisy accidentally ordered 10k or 10 kilograms of carrots. And the doctor's like, what the fuck is she going to feed an island?

Bunnies? What is happening? Dun dun dun. There's no ice cubes in the gist. Ice. Dun dun dun dun. So now the guests are arriving amidst this ice cube meltdown and No, but intended and so

Yes, they're walking on the dock and one lady is like don't be too impressed because we see this all the time So if you're too impressed you're a peasant, right? Okay, I Daze he's like they're not the primary so this could be a nightmare of the primary usually keeps the secondary players in line. Let's see how it goes It's like hi. Hi. My name's Hannah. This is Andy Andy just was just got done, um, you know French kissing strangers in the town square Okay, great. Oh, and your names are and everyone's like introducing themselves and The late one of ladies is like there's not gonna be a pop quiz later is there Well, well, let's go look for some wind guys

So that we get the tour and look at Glenn bringing on luggage. I mean Let's make some mention. Okay. He really, and he even gives a little men's joke. He brings up this one bag and he goes, this one here's the one with the gold bars in it. It's like, oh, Glenn. You're a dorkal man. And these guys are already hilarious. Like, one of the guys is like, oh, we are spending

all night in the hot tub, bitch. And Daisy turns around and she's like, so are ya couples then. She asks it in that way's like, so are your couples then? She asks it in that way, like, you poor things. And he goes, oh no, our husband stayed home, honey. And they all start cracking up. Yeah. So it's like one couple and then a girl and a gay guy.

And the girl and the gay guy, I think their husband stayed home. In case anyone was really concerned about this layout. So I actually didn't know. So there you go. I thought that guy was kind of me into his boyfriend. Yeah, no, no, because I went back, I actually went back like three times to try to figure it out.

I was like, what exactly are they all, not with their spouses or some with their spouses? So that's what I deduced. So, there you go. So then Gary, it was like detective. Did you deduce this when you saw how the toilet paper was folded in the guest head The perpetrator always goes back to the crime So so now Gary is helping shock oysters cuz his town is famous for shock oysters so go figure So you know congrats. Yeah, I'm already liking how his weird back story is filling out like I came from a town

room and known for shocking oysters and I had a few cheeky kisses with a shed and then I decided to get on the boat. And then he basically just slurps down all the way to the south. I know. Every time they cut back to Gary he's slurping down another oyster. And he's moving Sid tonight and Sid needs like I'm'm at night now and he's like yeah yeah I think it'll be better if we just switch it up she's like this is cuz I fucked you right like her eyes are saying like this is cuz of the fuck you right and Gary's like yeah it's just been a little tonight

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three jackets, three my jackets steamed if you can steam them. Yes, and I would love a cocktail with dried elderflower. And I don't know if it's possible to maybe catch a grouper and then grind it up and put it in the cocktail as a garnish. I would love that. Thank you so much. Yeah, I was done with them at dried elderflower. How about some go fuck yourself, okay?

How about that? How about we're in a time of, even if we weren't in a time of COVID, dried fucking elderflower. Shut up. Yeah. Face. Okay. Also, like I'm over elderflower. Okay. I never I never really understood what made it special. I don't like, you know, like when people put elderflower

in a champagne like that. It's over. It's over. Flour is had a stay and I can't believe someone with that much bow talks and fillers is asking for something with elder in the title Okay, and dried So So guess what the ice machine is still broken but Collins working on it and There's oysters and then Daisy's bringing up some tartar to the to the guests and everything so it's just sort of like the usual

you know Opening afternoon. I was just thinking we read through the notes on this show. We start to show off like this show is so funny. This is going to be the best episode we're like, and then elderflower. And then guess what guys? The ice machine is still broken. This just is still broken.

And now Khan has taken it out of its housing. I don't even know what could do that. I don't know what could come out of its housing. I guess I take a turtle out of its shell. Can that happen? Ridiculous. So Natasha, Daisy is being really short with Natasha. Cause Natasha's like, we can start carrying the plates up.

And Daisy's like, well, not nearly to give me a second to grab a tray. And Natasha goes, really? Yeah. It's just like the weirdest fight. These two are the weirdest fights. They have a weird chemistry. And then Natasha tells us, well, I did, you know,

the first starter was fine, but I know there's a problem with me and Daisy and guess what? I don't give a fuck because I'm here to work. And like, Daisy's trying to figure out what's in the tar tar. She's like, before I can go up, I have to know what is this kind of leaf. What type of leaf is this? And Natasha's like, it's like a cussure leaf or whatever it's called. She's like, oh, go to the car, leave. No, it's a cussure leaf. Okay, here's your tar tar with Essence of Anya in edge. Go enjoy. Yeah, and it's called enjoy. What?

What? What? Um, so Gary is, they're dropping lines. Time to drop some lines, guys. And people are throwing up lines to them from the dock. And Gary catches his Bajal desert, Portion Luke. And then the gay is like, oh my god, that's such a hot picture. You know what?

Look at this picture, I look super hot and I'm keeping it. Yeah, it's a lot of footage of him taking photos. And they are gonna be doing dinner at 8 and Danny's gonna be leading dinner service. So that way Daisy can teach Ali how did you turn down in less than five hours? And get your fins ready girl cause it's sink or swim tan.

Ali's like, oh, I didn't bring my fins. Is that a problem? SILDRAMA big cell, dumb, dumb. All right, let me explain to you like this. The whole tale is covered in TEDLARX, which means it sticks to itself, okay? And then what we need to do is we need to spray below the donkey. Okay, there's a rope that goes up.

You have to bring the rope through the donkey dick and you have to spray it through because the whole mast is only being held on by a rope. And if the rope is off, the sail could just go, do you know what a sail is? Here, let me damage, I'm gonna turn to my side. This is what a sail is. You know what I'm gonna pick up a sail boat

is a triangle, the triangle is the sail. Do you know what a seal is here. Let me damage. I'm gonna turn to my side. This is what a seal is You know what I picked the seal book is a triangle the triangle is the seal You know what a triangle is okay? You got your shapes okay squares and triangles This is the one you want the finger okay, this finger that I'm holding up. That's a rope Okay, then I'm gonna make a circle with my other hand, okay? Then you're gonna bring that rope through that circle do it again Oh my god, I'm my fingers fucking the whole You're gonna bring that rope through that circle. Do it again. Oh my god, my finger's fucking the hole. That's hilarious.

You guys getting this funny stuff. So Gary has to climb up this mast and he has to like over, he's sort of like helping the sail on for all because the Kevlar sticking to itself and everything. And Glenn is like, oh, you know what you maybe should do is maybe you should strap yourself onto something because you're sort of standing up high and you could fall and die or something like that but I'm not going to insist too hard because I'm very very nice man.

I got it I got it. And then of course he almost falls pissed off. Yeah he gets startled. He's ever, ever, ever. Oh my god that was amazing. I'm taking a picture of that. Oh my god it looks so hot in this picture with this guy I'm a sang right now. That was amazing. I'm taking a picture of that. Oh my God, I look so hot in this picture with this guy. I'm a sang right now. That was amazing.

And then there's more sailing nonsense where Gary says, Oh, the boat rope is broken on the left. I'm like, what? The boat rope is broken on the left. The boat rope is broken on the left. I don't know what language you're speaking now. Yeah, I don't know, but it works out. So then Gary is sitting with Sid. They're just kind of sitting there. I don't know, but it works out. So then Gary is sitting with Sid. They're

just kind of sitting there, I don't know, taking a break or checking the sales, who knows? But they're sitting together and it's kind of awkward and Gary's like, I'm going to be able to predict, I mean, it's not that I'm not attracted to, but you never know when I'll go where you, you never want to go there with your department, but my dick is strong with him. Brian. Well, that's your fault, sir. So don't say you're in a predicament as if you passively were put into a situation. So then Daisy is coming in for drink orders and Ryan is like, I don't know, surprise, I just, oh, I hate that. I don't know.

How do I, how do I surprise someone? What do I do? So then he's like, I'm that. Oh no. How do I, how do I, how do I surprise someone? What do I do? So then, he's like, I'm gay, so make me something fruity, okay? Garnish it with sparkles. And he's like, okay, so I like to give him garnish with diamonds, chopped with the mermaid's spire and smoked volcano from Nania. Doesn't exist, so he's getting a cure royal.

Yeah, so she makes me a cure royal with strawberry cure, which sounds disgusting to me. And then she serves it to him and she's like what do you think and he goes? Fire You probably bought tickets the fire festival and you know it you know he did And grunts like keep him I am the lazy sheet. Hey, who are you calling the lazy sheet? I meant literally the sheet. All right, you're good. He in your own bedroom now. He was stay away from the head. So now Gary sends Sydney down to sort of take a rest before

her night shift. And she's like, I expect a coffee, which I'm like, this is bad news for Gary. This is bad because it's not that she expects a coffee. She's expecting a gesture right now. You can tell, she's basically saying like, if he brings me a coffee, then I know where we stand. Like if he doesn't bring me a coffee, I also know where we stand. I mean, I mean, he's just, he's being rude, you know?

He's doing that typical guy thing, were you banging in the next day, they're like so awkward about it, they're like, oh's being rude, you know? He's doing that typical guy thing, where you bang and then the next day, they're like so awkward about it. They're like, oh, we don't even know each other. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J- Tom to listen to this just answer it It took me a minute which is like Ollie do you have do you have small bin bugs? It's like what's a bin bog I have to think about it for rock It's a trash bag, all right So they're like get on the radio so he gets on and cares like meet me into rage and he goes, well, I actually have a coffee on your coffee can we?

Can you believe that? Like, I'm always impressed every season of below deck any franchise that they find these people who would say their boss, hold on a second. I got some coffee on at the moment. So they get the tender out. And then the lady with a lady gay, wait, lady gay, what do you call it? Okay, the lady with her gay friend is like, said she like John Luke and he's like, yes! Yes, kid. So Gary and John Luke bring an attender and everything and then Daisy and Ali walk into the galley and knock over a box of lobster carcasses.

And there's like lobster shells and this weird black substance all over the floor. I was like, dark matter. It was so grown. I don't know what it is. And I read a whole book about lobsters last year. And I feel like I know so much about lobsters now.

But that's one thing I do not know about the strange black goo on that floor. And so they're like looking at this goo and then it cuts to a hanna up on the, up on the deck going, oh, there's so many beautiful sides out here aren't there. Why is it block? Why is it block? I mean, it's like, oh, trauma. So, um, Jean-Luc is like, okay, we're gonna set up the naughty boys. In the case like, oh my God, it's set down.

So, it's now like, dinner's gonna be at eight. And Gary wants JL to do something with the ropes. Like tie them around a post or something. You got to coil the rope. Coil the rope, what I'm chatting. Daisy is my department. So, so JL is like, half doing it, call her out what I'm cha Daisy is my department so So jail is like Half doing it, but there's like one of the the ladies the charter ladies is like on a like a paddle board

And he just keeps standing and staring at her so Gary gets all passive aggressive and he like grabs her up It's okay. Oh do it. Oh do it. You just do what you're gonna do Yeah, there's loads of times of ask you to do something, you just stand around like that. He's like, I cannot be micromanaged. Do not do it, okay. Well, there's the line is wrong, you know? Well, I was told not to drag the lines across the teeth.

Well, then that's the same size, and then we're gonna have to sweep everything around. Do you have to do it, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, gonna be like, oh, man, man. Yeah, we're gonna swap cabins right now. I'm gonna be a bit of a bit of a bit of a bit of a bit. I think, falls into the water off her paddleboard. And then we start seeing Jean-Luc move cabins. And Jean-Luc tells us this is what he says. He goes, well, it really wears me down about moving into the cabin with Captain Glenn. Is that Gary forced me to?

It's bullshit. Like, A, he's your boss. B, you complained about not getting sleep because you don't fit into your bed, so you bathed the ass for it, so I don't want to hear it. Yeah, and then Gary's in with Natasha while she's cooking. And he's like, I'll need to change a dick crew already. She's like, two or one.

And he's like, I'm not answering that. Well, what the hell? That you're going to have to fire a seed because you fuck said. Come on, you're the one being awkward not her exactly so then They change into their blacks and we're talking about the donkey dick thing again And go and it's like you gotta get the head off you gotta get the head of the top rope through the donkey dick It's like your zipper you can't have your dick in your zipper You gotta get your zipper before you you know,'m going to put my finger through this hole again. It's really funny. Anybody want to pull my finger while

it's fucking the hole? Come on. So now it's dinner service and Natasha's happy because she likes working with Danny as opposed to Daisy. And the foods coming out and all looks delicious, the guests are loving it. And downstairs, meanwhile Daisy is showing Ali how to do a turn down. And Ali is clearly not listening. She's like sitting at some desk and just like nodding her head and clearly not retaining anything that Daisy is showing her. Yeah. She just keeps her mouth kind of open at all times while she looks around it so funny. And Daisy's like, well, so with the bids, make sure you tuck the solids in here, not sure you should be using stuff on the ground. It just used some water, you're listening to me right? And now

he's like, Hi, I'm a dive master. Dive masters, you know, I see sharks and sharks float with the fins down big smiles with millions of teeth. I mean, if I can breathe underwater, I definitely like can make a bed. So you're not listening to a goddamn thing I'm talking about, are you been bogg? Do you know what it is when I said you're gonna sink or swim? I didn't say I wanted to hear about the time your went and saw, Shirk. I didn't, what I didn't mean literally put on some fins, okay? I don't care.

Sinking or swimming has nothing to do with your actual experience with swimming. So lobster tails. They're getting their lobster tail and clarified. Transition wise. Lobster tails. So lobster tails, lobster tail and clarified butter and rolled zucchini So Glenn is just watching Gary just work so hard and he's like not all first mates can maintain Sales and work so hard with a hangover like Gary I am

Blast you should see what he does with the broken zipper. Oh, man It's like I always say you got to undo the zipper all the way before you zip it back I already told you that you know how his zipper works? Okay, okay. Oh my god. Do you know what I love? You know, I love Lobster without a shell. I mean I love it like I didn't even have to work for this lobster tail There's no I just no shell. There's nothing. I love this is a sparkle lobster tail. All right great job And I love this is a sparkle lobster tail alright? Great job, Badge! A sparkle lobster, sparkle tail.

So now Sydney is awake and Gary's giving her the overnight list and she's like, Gary has been like all work and no flirt all day and I'm not really sure what's going on. I'm like, well what's going on is you guys slept together and now he's realizing how he was so completely unprofessional by it. So he's trying to course him right by not flirting and he's feeling awkward about it and that's pretty much what's happening here. He's basically ghosting you, but since he can't leave, he's just pretending you're a ghost.

Basically. Reverse ghosting, yeah. Reverse ghost. So Gary's like, you know, I can give you all a passion fruit. I don't know why he's giving. No, he's giving not all he's giving out. He it's it's it's contrasted. Ali Ali. Ali. Thank you. Flirty with Ali offering her passion fruit and flirting with her, but then being like all business with Sydney. So so lobster tails. Lobster tails. Am I right? So now J.L. gets

it. So Jean-Luc gets into his bunk with Glenn, and then we see Gary getting into his bunk. Are we sort of get a comparing contrast because with Gary and Colin, the conversation is like, oh, you know, I'm waking up in the hard on every single day. My penis is on. You know, we've talked on this show a lot about how so many of these guys seem to be getting a porn on movies. Yeah. Isn't that, you know, we've talked on this show a lot about how so many of these guys seem to be getting a porno movies. Yeah. Isn't just totally the beginning of a porno. Yes.

Or if like, dude, I'm so rough going to bed with a hat on. Wouldn't mind giving a rally kiss. Too bad she's not here. Wish I could break this. I can help you out with that, Seila. Then, but then meanwhile, J.L. like, Jean- like Jean-Luc. He's there with Glenn and he's the conversations like I hope I don't wake you up in the morning. Oh, that's okay Cool. Yeah

And he's so nervous. He's like sneaking into the he has to go to the top bunk to get past Glenn and it's not even a regular bunk where it's equal. Glenn has like a big, like basically a full-size mattress, right? So it sticks out more. He's six foot nine. He's like trying to sneak around Glenn. He's like, oh, just getting up into the, oh, but don't wake you up. Yeah, that's gonna suck. So meanwhile with the guest, Andy, one of the guests, he feels really tired and he's gonna, he's just gonna go to sleep early and they're like, oh, why's Andy gonna sleep early? So he goes into bed and he's like, God, I feel like,

Andy's like, ah, he's gonna, yeah, he totally shut down. And then Andy's immediately snoring, they just show the guest's cabin door is like's like, so now is the next morning. And so Andy and Hannah are a couple. So Hannah comes upstairs with no mask on and goes up to Daisy and goes, yeah, so Andy's not feeling well. I think he may have a fever.

I'm like, what if your man has a fever and you're sharing a bed with him, Why are you not wearing a mask when you emerge from that room to tell the staff? Like what like what rock are you living under? COVID-patrol It's true. It's true. It's true. Right? It's because she does get all up in it. She's like, come here. Can I whisper this right into your ear? Can I get some spittle right into your ear? Okay now, first, first, how is, okay, I got something to tell you.

The first, how is my breath this morning? I want to make sure it smells good. Does that smell good? What about you? You think it smells good? Okay, good, so now I can proceed. My husband has a big fever. Um, and you know, he said after dinner that he just started to not feel okay. And this is like, oh, speak to the captain, get your face out of my face. You dumb hit user.

And so she's like, one more thing about Andy, he is not allowed to yours the guest head. He has lost guest head privileges. So Glenn's like, oh Jesus, you know, obviously we're all thinking it's COVID. So Daisy comes and takes Hannah's temperature and she's like, you need to stay in the cabin. What's your luck? Great feast. They're trying to be nice and you know, and her defense, Hannah's pretty nice about it. She's not a demon. She actually looked a little scared. Like the gay is a total diva about it. She actually, I felt like she looked a little scared,

understandably. And so then Glenda's busy like, he's like, okay, I'm gonna call Kelly, the medical officer. So he calls Kelly and Kelly's like, okay, I'm sending Dr. Laura. In which case, I just was like imagining Dr. Laura just showing up on the boat. Like, okay, let me tell you guys something about you.

Okay. Yeah. If they can stand up to extremely conservative judgment, then they can stay. So, so basically, they have to, they're gonna have to retest all, they retest all four of the guests, okay? And in the meantime, they have to stay in their cabins

until they get the test results. And they are, you know, Colin says that, you know, we take so many COVID tests and we're in quarantine. I don't know how it's possible, but you know, if he has coronavirus, then we're all fucked, right? So Kelly, you know, Kelly and Dr. Laura show up. Dr. Laura is like, um, smells like single people not married, sleeping together. Hope you enjoy your baby morons. I have brought

someone from my medical practice, Dr. Tucker Carlson. Do you have any thoughts on this? Dr. Tucker Carlson. Uh, do you have any thoughts on this? Well, this yacht is ridiculous. This is... This is clearly some mainstream media created yacht. This isn't a yacht. We all know. This is mainstream media lies.

This is a dinghy. I'm no psychic, so I don't know who has COVID yet, but I can guarantee you this. Biden will not answer questions truthfully. Add a news press conference. There I said it. Eping! Hi, Dr. O'Reilly. Do you have any thoughts on what this patient

may be going through? It's a lie. It's a lie. Finally, a cast that a show that Bill O'Reilly can get back on, because it's all about sexual harassment. Yeah, exactly. So anyway, so Dr. Laura, I can't say her name without laughing, but Dr. Laura, Dr. Laura, I feel like people who are doctors named Laura don't even call themselves that anymore. You know, they're like, you could just call me Dr. Smith. I'm changing

my name to Dr. Phyllis. You can call me Dr. Phil for short. Damn it. Yes. Poor Laura. Sorry everybody out there if you're a Dr. Laura. That's got to suck. It's like for a lady's name to Karen. You know, it just sucks right now. Yeah. You'll get it'll be okay. So Dr. Laura shuts up and Andy is like coughing. He's got a fever and he's coughing and uh, Daisy is like, this is going to be the biggest fuck up in the entire world if he tests positive This so this would be like serving 20 pages and realizing you only served far So the doctors come to the gay's room and they're like Give you test. Oh my god. It's Andy. Are you serious?

He is just being the ghost first. He is the ghost first. He is the ghost first. He is being the worst. He is being truly the worst. And so Glenn has to tell them like, listen, you know, we're gonna go back to the doc and you're you guys can go into a hotel and to quarantine and Ryan is like, I have been quarantined already for over a week.

I've had enough of this. It's really expensive to sit in a box, okay? So let's make our way back. I'm like, well, why are you yelling at like, why are you acting like you chose to go back the dog? Like, you know, I was the manager of COVID. You get the manager of COVID on the phone right now. What is he supposed to do?

This someone has a fever and is coughing in the middle of a pandemic on a boat. Like this is the most, this is the most proper thing you should be doing, right? The most prudent thing you should be doing. And he is like, I have been sitting in a box in Croatia. You're still in Croatia. So beautiful Croatia.

And you've spent a day on a yacht like relax. Yeah. And so Daisy is bringing, coming to their doors and bringing them coffees and stuff and she's like, what's your like, any coffee or anything to eat to your own bathroom to take the heat and which you can do, probably not go anywhere else, alright? And she leaves stuff for them and he goes, these fucking guys. These, my God, they're helping you're helping you serving you during a health crisis. These fucking guys Yeah, he's an asshole. Yeah, so Sidney is like we are shocked. It's

Allie and then and then so they finally Doc back in the port and so Glenn goes down to like the finally a doc back in the port and so Glenn goes down to like the quarantine quarters and he's like so if you guys want to put those masks on we're ready for you and Ryan's like so pissed. Oh well look I'm so really sorry for the incaronovenience anyone anyone just trying to make light here come on guys take it take a breath. This is depressing. Yeah, this is awful. So they like walk off. It's just funny, cause they're like all walking off the boat. And by large, everyone's very understanding, except for Ryan, and they're walking off.

And it's just funny, cause you see the entire crew just nodding and smiling like, oh, so sorry. Get the fuck off our boat, peace by. Yeah. Maa. And so that brings us to the end, so we don't know. Does Andy have corona? I don't know does Andy have corona?

I don't know. I mean it gosh I mean you forget that you can just get regular sick and that is something that can happen I bet he's the only has strep throat. I bet that's what's gonna. I guess my guess my guess is on strep throat I don't know. I have no guesses for that, but it'll sure be interesting to say yeah for real is real. I mean, that's like some real life shit that was happening there. It was pretty scary, to be honest. We're joking, but that's scary. That's very, very scary. So we'll see you next week.

In the meantime, watch what happens live tonight, everyone. Check us out. And we'll be back tomorrow with the real housewives of Dallas, which will be super fun. So we'll talk to you on the next one. And bye everybody! Bye! Watch what crap ends with like to think it's premium sponsors! Ain't no thing like Alice and King!

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