Watch What Crappens - Dwell Hello: Mother Knows Best In Kentucky

Episode Date: December 3, 2021

We're traveling to Covington, KY for this recap of House Hunters season 190, episode 6:  "Mother Knows Best In Kentucky"See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to watch what crap ends at free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off, voice only. Launching during pride, Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. to Dwell Hello. I'm Ben, that's Ronnie. Hey Ronnie, what's up? Wahabian. Hi. So welcome to Dwell Hello. If you're new to it, this is our show

where we recap house hunters and things from the house hunters extended universe. And we do it every Friday. This is our second season of doing Dwell Hello. The first season is available exclusively on Stitcher Premium. So if you want to hear the first season where we have some really fun episodes, sign up for Stitcher Premium. So if you want to hear the first season, whether we have some really fun episodes, sign up for Stitcher Premium and then just do a search in our podcast feed and you'll

find it. But today, today on Duel Hello, we have a very special episode that one of you guys requested and we are open to all sorts of House Hunters episodes, House Hunters, House Hunters International, House Hunters Small House, Tiny House, whatever it is. Just hit us up on Instagram and we love getting suggestions because there's so many of you shows and we'll cover them. But today, today's episode is called Mother Nose Best in Kentucky. And if you're looking for it, you can find it on YouTube TV

and it's season 190, episode six, Mother, Nose, Best, and Kentucky. Yes. And let's see, this is like a little mom and then a lady who just loves her statement necklaces. Yes. This is the story of a woman in her statement necklaces. Yes, the mom reminds me of sadness in the movie Inside Out.

Remember that, like the little blue sadness, like if the little blue sadness emotion in Inside Out actually had like, you know, blonde hair and like, you know, non-blue skin, it would be the mom. I'm not saying the mom is sadness. I'm just saying the mom seems to have styled herself after the mom. I'm not saying the mom is sadness. I'm just saying the mom seems to style herself after the sadness. I don't know that because I got that movie downloaded to watch what we were traveling around a couple years ago. And I never watched it because everyone's like, you're going to cry. So like every movie I have left on the iPad is movies that will make me cry. So I haven't watched yet. But she reminds me of somebody from

the television show, The Leftovers, whoever seen that, the lady that they stoned. Oh, God. Oh, my God. And it's like such a dark storyline, right? And I'm like, oh, my God, who this woman is, and it's just killing me. So it's funny that you call her sadness. And I think that she's a woman that got stoned.

Could you please just Google sadness inside out? Just that image. Okay, just Google sadness or do the image search. So, and you will see Shannon, the mom. Oh my gosh, it is her, it's like the child version of her. How cute. It's like Shannon, you encompass sadness. Stylusically, you are stylus.

That's how it's like. Stylusically, you are sadness. The character. And are stylistically. You are stylistically, you are sadness, the character. And she does look kind of like a cartoon because she has like little frowny face eyebrows, which are real weird there, and they're much smaller than her eyes. So she's got normal eyes, but then she's got, it looks like she put thumbs

above her eyeballs or above her eyes and then drew with a marker like around her thumbs little eyebrows. Well, that's really cute. She is, but she also, I think the thing is she there's something about her that kind of like speaks of Nancy Grace as well. Like there's something there's like she has a like a like a Nancy Grace quality and I think maybe it's from the eyebrows, you know, like there's just sort of like that sense that like if you gave Shannon a TV show, she would probably rant about someone, you know, oh She seems so sweet to me. Oh my God. Are you sure you can handle this?

But of course that's a sudden matter. She's so undermining. She is so undermining the entire episode. I said, oh, this is so darling for someone who actually has a husband, but unfortunately She is she is very much someone who actually has a husband, but unfortunately, I don't have that. She is. She's very much. She is undermining. And I love her. But she's so undermining that. I mean, that's what I love about her.

And it starts with them in the car. Well, we're seeing, you know, things are upcoming in the episode, but they're in the car. And she's like, Mom, you just missed that turn. I was like, oh, I was trying to drive to a street with more hope on it. But you're right. Let's go back to that sad one, honey. I guess sometimes I get distracted by all your godly with more hope on it. Then you're right, let's go back to that sad woman. I guess sometimes I get distracted by all your gaudy jewelry you hang on that turkey neck of yours.

So Linda says, Kentucky resident Kendall is ready to buy her first home, and she's enlisted the help of her mother. And Kendall's got a long list of wants, but her mom thinks a house is too much for her to handle because Kendall has never been able to shoulder responsibility her entire life. Her mother just can't turn off that worry switch.

And talk about not turning off the switches, this little idiot won't turn them off either. Guess what her electricity bill is going to be. You know what global warming is going to be? If she's in charge of turning off the lights at night, it's not going to be dead soon. I'm going to tell you that much right now. Well, I have a worry switch, but my daughter has an idiot switch, and unfortunately it has never turned off. Never turned off.

Never turned off. So she's a very conservative blonde lady, little smart glasses and a little blonde bob, and she's wearing a black and white jacket, but it's like shaped. Like there's different shapes on it. It's very like, it's very geometric. It's very geometric.

Yes, this is like her geometric art. She probably like runs like their Covington Kentucky Museum of Contemporary Art. She's like, I'm very connected to the art world. Yeah, they do have that bit of snottiness to them. Yeah, both of them. So, because she's like a total spoil, Brat, you can tell. And she's very sweet in this episode of The Rock.

I actually love him, but I would hang out with him on a heartbeat. Me too. I think I have. I think she's that familiar to me, you know? But she seems like, yeah, she's been raised with some money or something. I feel like she's been raised with, like,

definitely an overbearing mother. And she's kind of like, she seems like a little sort of, stunted in, not stunted, that's so rude. Not stunted, but she seems like she's sort of spinning in her wheels, like, because her mom has like put oil below the wheel, so the wheel can't go forward. I read a lot into Kendall. We all just blame our mothers, don't wait the end of the day.

Let's get into it. Here we are, you know that we're in Covington, Kentucky, because House Hunter says Chosen to Put Music from the Backwaters of Mid-Batie Movies in it. It's like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I mean, I like, I like, I mean, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, ribbon wreath But the ribbon wreath is made of chevrons so I'm already like my eyebrows like what's going on here? So she so she knocks on the door and then she opens it up because so I see the doors unlocked again So mom you have to go through the first door to even get to that one. Oh, you mean the first unlocked door to go through the first door to even get to that one. How, you mean the first unbocked door?

Well, didn't this find. So Candle is a daughter, and she's wearing a terribly bright purple top and horrid non-fitting statement, necklace. Listen, make a statement. Say, my necklace fits, okay? Your necklace, the statement starts down at your rib lines. That's not, and it looks like a big gold mustache smiling. Just, she needs some work.

She might as well have just been selling cigarettes from a tray at that point, you know, so Kendall's like She's said the mom walks in and she goes so have some tea or coffee, huh? Like like a real hostess would have ready for their mother who did everything for them this is And Kendall's like well, I think that we're probably closer than most mothers and daughters If she calls me or text me and if I don't answer in 10 minutes, she's probably going to call the police department. Okay.

And Shannon's like, well, I do watch too much, date line, and I'm always afraid that you're somewhere being hurt, abducted. You know, that's true, but they'll probably just bring you right back if they're abducted. Let's be honest. I do call the police, and I'll tell them, Lord, please make sure that kid mapper has a sandwich, because she will eat everything be honest. I do call the police and I'll tell them Lord, please make sure that

kid mapper has a sandwich because she will eat everything in the glove box. I'm telling you right now. I call the police because I want at least someone to look for my daughter. Definitely not happen on the apps. So Kendall's like, God have ducted mom. Yeah, they bring her back. But so then the mom goes into the fridge and opens it. She's you only have cramery in here Are you kidding? What do you eat out every single night? Just well, sometimes they get it delivered Well, you can't be doing that if you're purchasing a home or trying to meet a man or try to really anything in life candle So like sadness delivery every day, Kendall

Handle. So, like, sadness delivery every day, Kindle. Now, I know I look like sadness. It doesn't mean you have to eat it every day. And Kindle tells us, I live in a one bedroom. Just me and my dog, Lola, and I've acquired some things. Her mom's like, clothing. That is what she's talking about. Clothing, not.

Lots of clothing. It's definitely not man, if that's what you're a wandering. This is it. She kind of looks like, I just want a house with a yard. You know, she's sort of like, just a house with a yard would be lovely. Well, taking care of a yard is so much work. I mean, you mow in the grass.

Do you know about mowin? You ever heard that word? M-O-W that too long of a word for you, Kendall. And Kendall just wants the yard for her dog because anyone who buys a house has a dog. It's like, I don't have to walk that fucker anymore. I mean, that's how I was. I was like, just a yard and make it big enough so he can poop and I'll never know about it.

Like, I want a mile long yard. Okay. I don't care how far away from the city I have to live. I don't want to see the poop. I don't want to even know that he's pooping. Yeah. So Kendall's like, well, mother, do you cut your own grass? Yes. Well, no, I don't cut my own grass. So Kendall's like, well, mother, do you cut your own grass?

Yes. Well, no, I don't cut my own grass. I do hire someone, you know. I don't know if you know what it's like to have a man come to your house and do things for you, but it is possible. Well, then why could my hire someone? Oh, honey, has there ever been a man ran to you that had run? Come on.

If you were in a condo, you wouldn't have to worry about that. So my wish list is condo. And she's like, I don't want a condo. I've lived in apartments. I want an older home with some character. I want another bedroom. Maybe I have a three bedroom, even, and make the third bedroom a closet.

At this point, Shannon's eyebrows basically do a high five to each other because they're so arched, they're essentially just like touching. It's like, mm, mm. Oh, I guess I suppose this is probably my fault too, that you've always lived in apartments, okay? Oh, it's my fault. So Kendall's like, you know, I'm a shopaholic. I'll admit that and you know,

I would, I really would love is a huge master closet, you know, and I want to pay for something in the 200, 200 range. Where the fuck are you people living that you're finding a three bedroom and a 200, for $200,000. I will be moving to Covington Kentucky. I was thinking the same thing. I was like, it looks kind of cute. Should I move to Covington Kentucky?

I mean, look at this. I mean, I never leave the house anyway. Does it really matter where I live. So the mom's like, well, because of her passion for shopping, I'm thinking she could find something suitable in the 150 range. I mean, that better fits her financial said delivery situation.

Okay. I mean, this woman is not giving up her cashew chicken. I'll tell you that much. And please, I just want to emphasize that I don't do air quotes with my fingers. I just use my eyebrows. So please be sure that you heard the emphasis on passion because that was sarcasm because she has no passions in life. So that kind of right now the way the market is, you're going to have to be ready to go.

I mean, right away, you see something, you buy that thing because I know because every time I see something, I look online and then it's gone three hours later. And she has, Candle has a coffee mug with like a flowery edge to it. I was like, oh, God, she's one of those. So I'm gonna get a flower. I'm gonna get a coffee cup that's like literally shaped like a flower at the zipper.

Come on. Well, you know, Candle, I thought you'd be okay with seeing that places that you were interested in are now suddenly pending. I mean, that is the word I like to use with the Euro-Mantic future. Oh my God, everything's already taken. It's like Cattillian all over again, isn't it, mate? Also, I think this is with the moment when I'm honest when I truly noticed what Shannon was wearing because you were mentioning there's like geometric things. The funny part about Shannon is she's so mean to her daughter in this cheery way and her sweater has all these little polka dots on it.

Like, look at me, I am cheery. I am a cheery, cheery, happy woman who wants nothing but happiness for her daughter. And if she does get abducted, please commit to it, because I can't have another return to Sanda. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. So she's like, well, honey, you know that I'm just giving opinions. You know, I offered those freely. She's like, you do mother, very freely.

Ha, ha, ha, ha. So first up is in Ludlow, Kentucky. And this one's 209. And mom's like, well, that's your price range 209. And she's like, well, 209, mother, I said a little bit above you. And this is a little bit above too. Oh, are you talking about the kind of man you like, like a Coventon 2? Coventon 2.

You're going to get a Covenant 2 with zero nines. Is that what you're telling me? Well, Marna, you better be a Covenant 3 if you want to get a Covenant 2. And the real estate lady just wants her picture on a bus bench. So I like, I think, I think she's just walking around dressed in the bus bench uniform until someone puts her on the damn bus bench. I wrote down Christine Ray, the realtor Christine Ray, definitely auditioned for American Idol at some point. She's like, but I'm not her mom, Shannon won't send me around the 150 mark, but I'm confident the values there.

So her name, yeah, Christine Ray. So she has very serious banker eyes. She's like has very wide, blanky eyes and also a terrible statement necklace with little black beads. So Covington is a big place for terrible statement. So they walk into this house and Shannon goes, oh, I'm going to say something that I have never said about candle. Oh, it's really cute in here. God. And Kindle is like, I love this old tree. And it has a porch. You can sit there. I mean, that's what porches. The, my favorite thing on these shows, when they're like, wow, it's a bathroom. I could use the restroom in here or take a shower.

All the, all the obvious functionality. So they love it's cute. It actually is a cute house. It's really cute. Yes. And it's got high ceilings It's lots of charm and I mean it has sort of a weird thing with like this Like a chimney kind of like right in the middle and the room to go around the chimney But I think it's like very cool in the way that people There's like a space that's being used strangely like there's a random refrigerator in it But like I could totally see that it's like a cute little cozy library area sort of behind the living room I was like, oh, oh, I am already very sold on this house.

Yeah, I think it's a really cute house too, and it's old. You know, it's from 1883. Christine's like, it's been here a hundred years, but man, you made me great. So I mean, that's way more than a hundred years, right? It's a hundred years also. Yeah, thank you, because I was like, wait, that math doesn't work, but I don't really know math, so I'll just leave that to bit. But it's also like back then, you know, just guessing based on the houses we see from back then, they have like one outfit, because there's never a closet.

And I think they pooped outside, because the bathrooms are never anything, you know? Well, at a hundred and thirty-six years old, I mean, that might have been before a toilets. I don't know. So, it's also like... We should know that. I'm going to put into Google, when were toilets invented? Well, while you look that up, I will say that. 1596.

Well, I mean, we're way off. 1596. Like modern toilets. Can we not get like the like the ridiculous like well Vincent Gablooby in the The Tuscan region of Italy came up with the world's first toilet. We put a wooden plank on top of a hole. I don't want that. So I want like modern toilets. So

Anyway, they're going to this house, which is very poorly decorated at the moment because there's like this shitty dark leather sofa. It was clearly like being used as a bachelor pad. And there's like a dining room. The dining room is really cute, like a nice side dining room. And then the kitchen, the kitchen was big.

Like it was the first floor I thought was like a really strong first floor. Yeah, I was pretty good, but it was, you know, it's one of those you walk through all the rooms, you know, because there's like separate rooms for everything. And yeah, some bachelor did make one room a game room with a fridge and it was kind of weird. And you can't really just say make it a huge kitchen and knock down a wall, because things don't really work. You can knock down the whole house. Yeah, but that one you got you want. And then Christy even Christy is like piling onto kind of all because oh, here, this is a this is a very open kitchen for all the cooking

you do inside joke with you Shannon right? Cash or chicken over here. But you know, this kitchen, it's close to your backyard, which is really good and which I don't really know why that would be good But it is apparently to Christine and so they go back there and it's a tiny backyard And there's just like a couple patches of grass and the mom's like well that's perfect because there's not too much grass for this idiot to try and figure out Let me tell you something about Kendall She knows a thing or two about grass. If you catch my drift, why do you think it's all that come out chicken coming her way? So Candle's like, well, there's not exactly a view back here. And they have to park in the back alley. It's one of those places where

everybody parks behind. And the mom's like, well, that could be an issue, especially if she comes in late at night line, late line, late line, late line. Do you see where I'm going with this? Christine? Oh, we're going to murder my daughter. Do you see where I'm going with this? Christine, what time is it? I'm murdering my daughter. Christine, I take that back. Coming in late at night implies some sort of social life. She'll be fine. So they have to go up a really steep ass stairway

to get upstairs. Yeah. And Kendall's like, oh my God, I feel like I'm hiking. Yeah, it looked like the very annoying staircase. But upstairs, the bedrooms are all really big. And whoever lived there earlier already converted one of the rooms into a big walk-in closet. And Shannon's like, oh, well, look at you.

Your dream has come true. A walk-in closet for all the quote-unquote clothes or whatever it is you call them that you collect all of the years instead of putting them towards a career. Well, but finally, in spaceman has moved up to the second floor. Congratulations, Cantal. You found it.

And there's a laundry room right by the primary room, which is good because, you know, she doesn't have to walk up and down to Deval Laundry. Yes. And the clouds, it's her nothing, right? And there's only one bathroom on the second floor and a kind of sex Yeah, that's true too. So then Shannon's like, hmm, okay, so now we've seen the the steepy McStaircase house So what was the cost of this again and Kendall is like well, I said I could do a little over 200 mother And that's a little over 200 and Shannon's eyebrows are just like okay

We're just gonna arch these eyebrows until you understand how I feel about this. Yeah, she was well, this house is darling. For someone he's not a complete loser face. Okay, for Camtel, this would be too much to take care of. You think she's gonna walk up those stairs? No, this girl's gonna buy a $200,000 house and sleep on the floor of the living room every night

while she falls asleep to some sap and movie on Netflix with popcorn hanging out of mouth. All right, that's not what we need. Why don't you even need a living room in us and a room next to living room? She has no friends. Her best friend is a soda stream named Samuel. So, Christine's like, guys, not gonna last.

She's so like real steady, this Christine. Guys, this market's nuts, nothing's gonna last. Better do it right now. So then I will walk out of your store right away, man. Yeah, so then Shannon, who's just been like, those tips are treacherous. Now all of a sudden puts on her like sweet, sweet, Shannon, motherly things where she goes,

you know what, I would just love to see her in a condo. One thing I'd like to see before I die is my daughter looking at a condo. She doesn't have to take it. I just want to do that for a sweet mother. You know, she wanted to take care of a yard. I think it might be safer. Would you just mind if we look? Would you make your mother? Please, please, just for me. I mean, is the closest and wording to what I've always dreamt for you that never turned out. Please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please love that we started this by being like, oh my god, I would be friends with Kendall. What a cool girl.

I love her. And she's so freak-couple. She's like stupid, loser with no boyfriend. Well, we're just saying that's what her mom thinks of her. Not us. We know that she is. I know. I'm not gonna let all of her down in the best possible way.

Yeah, we're just trashing poor Kendall. Commissars, here comes one right now. But even Kendall is surprised by the condo that she does see, and then they're driving, and there's a ring. And Kendall's like, oh my god, this is Christina on the phone. The mom's like, oh, how Christina, it did you get your bus, Banshee yet? How do you consider the voice? It's a good show too. So, so Christine's like, I found a condo.

It's only 175. Get over here now. This is going quick. I'm telling you right now. They're real they're dying. They're so tears just trying so hard to convince them that like coming to this now this huge bustling metropolis right. So kind of like oh my god okay we were on our way to Hobby Lobby mom has gifted

But we will be there. We'll do it now. I wrote literally almost the same thing I because Kendall because Kendall goes can we go now? Yeah, we can go now I was like we'll just have to cancel our trip to the Joanne Fabric's Expo You're gonna have to cancel our reservation chick Chick-fil-A. All right, let's get over there. Hey, hey, Candle. Hey, sweetie. Do you think you can tell your friend no one that you're gonna have to cancel on your nothing? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, start working on that RSV please invite me someplace anybody anywhere I don't really care where. Hold on let me get the address this condo so I can call the criminals to abduct you maybe one of them

will take you this time. Oh so Kendall's like oh my god she said it's a condo I don't know mom she's like mom it is just weird as gypsy rose le shit. She's like, just for mom. Okay, for now, for now, honey, come on. And so they get there in Christina is like, okay, you've got visitor parking over there. You've got your own assigned space and you have a garage. Well, that is a lot going on for someone really with just a postal person is a friend.

But you know what? No, what's gonna complain about extras. The good thing is that Samuel the soda stream doesn't even need a car, because it's not a real person. I don't even think trick or treaters are gonna be coming up here, but whatever. Let's see.

Do you mind if we just turn her visitor parking and her assigned spot into some sort of community garden? I don't think they're going to be used. So, um, they go up and Candle's like, um, is this parking lot the only place to take the dog out? She's, oh yeah, but you know what, there's a park up the street and you're right on the river. Oh wow, sounds great coming home at two in the morning on the water, having to walk your dog up. Doesn't sound creepy at all. Yeah, I love the mom is like perfectly happy for Kendall

to go to some nearby park in the middle of the night, but like God forbid, she parks next to her cute home. So the place is built in 1991, in case you couldn't tell by the strange colors that are happening all over, it's like purples and then white reds and greens. Oh God, the hallway is the Monica's apartment from Friends Purple.

Yeah. This is not good. This is a place they built back then to be like lofty, like friends and then they got the color like friends. And they put copper piping all over the walls as decorations. So bad. A loft, you know.

Kendall walks through the front door. She goes, oh, the door looks pretty old Oh, that's it honey door. That's what I should call you door old door Christine's like might need a little work she's like I know, but she really is trying the apartment. Oh, right What is this copper here? Well, Christine goes, I think they were trying to use it as an artistic design. Shannon's like, Oh, it's not see that someone in this room had some ambition at some point. This little idiot will be wearing that around her neck, give her about five minutes in here. It's screw gun. So they go out onto the patio and you can see the river.

And the mom's like, Well, my, this will look amazing. Right now it looks a little. Yeah, it kind of like terrifying. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick.

Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick.

Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. T Chris is like, well, there is an H.O.A. Oh, God. Someone's got a hoe for a daughter. That's good news, you know? Who is she? Does she live on this floor? Will she influence my child? No, H.O.A. It's for landscape, in snow, and property maintenance. Do they also include a makeover in there? I'm just wondering. 400 bucks should get you a decent haircut,

at least, Christine. Come on. So they take a tour. And by the way, it's 400 bucks, H-O-A. It's crazy. No, bam. Are you crazy on a way? Yeah, no way.

Actually, I think that view is actually a really good view. And I actually think at night, it's probably awesome. But then everything else about this place is awful. Like it's so bad, this condo. It's really old and outdated. There's gross carpet, tiny bathroom, tiny kitchen, and Kendall's like, okay, so I see that there's white shelving, but there's no cabinet doors on the cabinets.

Because people just with regular cabinets were like, let's have, let's have open cabinet. You don't do those with actual, with actual cabinets. You don't just take off the door. It's still got all the metal on the side. You know, where you screw the door up. Yeah. Yeah. And Christina's like, well, the doors are not here anymore, but that's something you could add if you wanted to. Well, I think the opposite is there is if you wanted to. I mean, let's see, let's see Candle do anything that she's ever wanted to.

I hate when something like is so glaring like that, one of the homes like there's no cabinet doors. Oh, you can add, yeah, no shit, Christine, okay. The fact is I should get a discount because this don't have like functional cabinets, okay? Yeah, so Candle's like, well, I mean, I don't use the kitchen. However, I would like to have a decent kitchen. That would be not too much, right? So they go with the laundry. The all the laundry.

The things around us, but they sometimes just don't pan out, darling. I should know. You know what I would like to be updated once in a while? You're Google cow. But you know what? I can't do lots of like flowers. They grow fast and they die young, honey. So then there's like a there is a fireplace, but it's like a very big bulky fireplace that seems to take up a lot of a lot of the footprint in the living room. And then they go upstairs for what is technically the master suite because it's actually a

lofted master, which is like even less appealing, although she's kind of like, so there's no privacy for who you can't do who's coming over you to be proud from. You think some see which is going to come out of that river and start looking in here. There's literally nobody to look in here, candle. So so shaman's like, well, the views are probably even better up here than downstairs. I love this. It's a condo.

It's a condo. Oh, he's a candle. Don't you love how the walls, the same color as your sweater, just like a floating head over here. It's good with at least weight, just to make it disappear into the painting. And candles like, I mean, this does does this carpet in the bathroom, mother. Well, you know what? It's one way to get your feet clean, okay?

Cause I know you don't like bending all the way down there. You just get your feet wet. And when you get out, just rub them a little on the carpet, okay? It'll be in improvement. So, so Candle's like, definitely feels like it needs major updates and chance like, is she even considering how much work there is in an old historical home? I mean, things break down constantly. I mean, this is all cosmetic. Nothing a sledgehammer on a wall, a new kitchen and some paint can't take care

of, take care of, gosh, I wish it were that simple for candle. You know what, Christine, this place really to just make it decent. All I ask is it has like a nice 30 second or 30 minute free session at an old time. Hey, Candle, why don't you and this content go to Ulta and see who looks better afterwards? Hmm. So there is a huge closet and the mom's like, can't make the view, Candle. Oh, shut up. Okay, because that's not even a view. It doesn't count because it's in a lofted bedroom

where the wall, you know, that's covering the lofts, you don't fall off the rail wall or whatever covers the view. You can't see that from bed. So you can see it while you walk into bed, but no, this place sucks. Yeah, it sucks in so many different ways. So she finds a new house that's updated except for one area that's Linda teasing the next house.

Yeah, they're headed to let low. This place is for $200,000 and the mom's like, oh my god, have door lane. It's a yellow door and Kendall said, and there's a porch. It's a place you can sit. We know you can sit on porch congratulations. Although I'm a little uncomfortable with that radical yellow door. I mean wait, are we Los Angeles or something like that? Goodness. So they walk in and it's all nice hardwood floors and they're all original floors and it's 99 year old house. This place is adorbed. I love this place. Me too. So cute.

And, um, Christine's like, well, guys, it's 200 and unfortunately for you, these go quickly. Oh my God. Anything other to it just flies off the market. Hold on. Hold on. Somebody hold this wood up while I nail it into the front door because people are going to be beating it down, trying to get in here. into the front door because people are gonna be beaten and tried to get in here.

Just really, really trying to sell it. So there's like a fireplace and there's kind of love that there's high baseboards and there's a nice sized dining room and there's like a kitchen that has subway tile but there's a bathroom in the kitchen which I don't really see an issue with. I mean, I understand what the issue could be with, but I think that as a house hunter's drawback,

I don't think it's the worst. It's not great and Christine is so funny because Kendall's like, well, the bathroom off the kitchen, there's not much space in here. And the mom's like, yeah, off the kitchen, that is awkward and Christine goes, yeah, well, you know what? I thought you might make an

exception. Cause look, it's right by the backyard, which is good for entertaining. And you'll have that quick access to the bathroom. Oh, good candles that would you make your shitty enchiladas or whatever you call them when people get the run, they can get right to the bathroom quickly. So now people won't smell the poop. they're eating. They'll smell it while you're cooking, okay? It's great, it's a great tradeoff, Edmith. So then, yeah, Christine sells that

bathroom access to the outside very hard because she says it a few times, like, and this way you can get that bathroom super quickly. As if it takes like 10 more minutes to get to the bathroom anywhere else in the house. I know and the backyard the backyard is literally the easiest place to go to the bathroom for free without a bathroom and it has a great backyard by the way it's a super cute backyard and uh kind of like Lola will love it she can spend her golden years out here. Oh, darling, darling, darling, darling. That dog's an outlast to you is keeping that kung-pow chicken.

Yeah. Yeah, you know, she wants yard space, but I don't think she understands mowing is involved. Also, you know, what the whole reason I wanted her to get a dog was to actually go out and see people. How is she gonna find a man in her backyard? How? And then, so then they go down to the basement,

which is an unfinished basement, and that's where the laundry is. And it's like, oh my God, I might have to do laundry in a basement, an unfinished basement. I'm like, welcome to like 95% of houses. Yeah, that's us, though, if your bedroom's too up, like having to walk down, listen, I'm lazy like Kendall, I don't want to do that shit either.

And it's like creaky and creepy down there. If you're a woman living alone, having to go down to the dark basement, like, I don't like it. And she says it's creepy and it's scary at night. And then they go upstairs to, none of these places have a primary room, the older homes. They just have a bigger room. And they're like little tiny closets again. And Christine's like, but these war robes stay. Oh, really? Thanks, Christine.

They're like target $20. I know. Those were full IKEA ones. She's trying to say, like, these watch robes are 200 years old. Like, no, I still see that it says a pure gun at for my Kia. Hold on, let me just say it in this window. We're quick. I'm sorry. Time to meet Dan the door for these wardrobes. Okay, I'm now going to pass some of them on before you. I'll let you know cause these wardrobes are going to go fast. Hurry up. I have to say when Christine showed

them the regular closets and she's like, now these closets in the master are not that grand and she opens the door and it wasets in the master are not that grand. And she opens the door and it was literally like a wall. It was like opening a door to a wall. I was like, there's no closet there. That's not even just like, oh, it's not a walk-in. It's like, that's not a put your hand in it. There's no room for anything in that.

I know, that's like one of those little ironing cupboards, you know, where like the iron board could like flip down. Yes, it was. It was like, I like a very small Murphy bed. So then the second bedroom is kind of the same and then there's a main bathroom and but it's the only full bathroom in the house and it's on the second floor and she's like,

oh, that if I have people stay with me, we'd have to share. Oh, you, you are fun, people stay with me. I'm sorry, what would you say? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Oh, hurry up, hurry up, gotta do today. So Candle's like, oh my God, I knew it was gonna be fast, but so the mom and Candle have this discussion, you know, the ending house hunter's discussion. And Candle's like, I mean, that lady is really putting pressure on me.

I don't wanna decide that fast. So, but you got to, I mean, this is Kentucky. People are moving here and throws, Candle. Yeah, and then Linda's like if Kendall doesn't make a decision fast she may lose out on the house as she's seen in the hot Covington market could you hear my sarcasm? So number one the historic mom's like well, it was. That was a large house for people with, you know, let's call that the ambition house. I think that's above what should be comfortable

for you. By the way, I love that you always dress so comfortably. Listen, comfortable is great for a style, but I don't know if it's great for a home. And Candle's like, well, it's got a big closet, the laundry's upstairs, and it has a perfect size backyard, enough grass for Lola, and enough to manage, and that's, I don't know, only $200,000 in nine dollars. And she's like, well, let's go on to house number two. I mean, got that condo. I mean, that really matched your personality. What are you talking about, mother? That needed so much updating and it was just tacky. Exactly.

Copper just hanging off of it for no reason. But the views incredible, mom. Well, that third one though, that yellow door. Oh, the yellow, that vulgar yellow door on the third one. Yeah, oh the yellow that that vulgar yellow jaw on the third one Yeah And that's you know the kitchen's great, but that bathroom. It's right off the kitchen It's so awkward and you know It's only got one full bath and laundry's in the basement. It's gonna be scary

I'm gonna be pooping in the kitchen. I'm never gonna be able to do my laundry thing dong. I've chosen that one Yeah, because Shannon's like, yeah. She's like, yeah, take a day. So, but that is the one that she chooses. And so Shannon walks in. She's like, the door's unlocked again. She's like, well, mother, I knew you were coming. Okay. I warned all the neighbors that a devil was coming

to the down the street. And the mom comes over with a covered dish, just like covered in tin foil. And Kendall's like, um, is this an oven dish or a microwave dish? She goes, microwave, not with the foil on it. Kendall cheeses. So Kendall tells us she picked a single family with a yellow door and she'd loved it. You know, it was listed at 1799. So I got it when in full ask and I got it that same day.

Which shows you that Christine's a goddamn liar because of people were beating down the door. You would have hired her over to get that house. That's exactly right. You know, so I can, she's like, you know, laundry isn't great. You know, I have to do two flights of stairs every time But we're getting it done and mom Thank you for helping me and she's well glad I could and glad you asked and of course by you asked I said

Hey, I need to help you and you said okay fine. I'll do that if you buy me kung-pang but chicken and so I did it You want me to help you with this mortgage? you're going to take me, you little brat. Okay, mother. So then Kendall starts choking up. She's like, mom's always been supportive of my decisions. Well, not really that support. She actually doesn't like any of my decisions, but she's taught me to be independent. Well, more like dependent on her.

And to follow on what I believe in or what she believes in, it's just been so great. Having her, well, it's been actually pretty terrible. Having her through this process. But God, I'm glad I have a mother. Oh, honey, we can get here and we can play some UNO together. Don't worry, it's a fun game. Sad lifestyle. Oh.

And then it ends with Shannon, the mom saying, this is great. I'm proud of you. That's like her emotional moment and she just her lips are pierced and she's like barely, barely putting a smile on her face. Their eyes are just so angry. I know because you know in her head it's like this overgrown grass in the backyard. The snakes are going to be hiding in and Kendall's going to fall down the basement steps trying to do laundry and get attacked by someone from date line.

Oh, and it's got I love that this house is such a not view of anything. I love looking at the not river in your house, Candle. That's not even in Covington. Oh, well, there we go. So thanks for suggesting this episode, guys. If you have a favorite episode, you want to suggest just go to Instagram and comment on one of these house centers posts.

We read them all. So it's at what, watch what crap is on Instagram and at what crap is on Twitter. And if you like this, you know, subscribe. All that good stuff. And we love you guys. We'll talk to you next time. Bye, everyone.

Bye. Celebrity Beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasive. And I'm Sydney Battle. And we're the host of Wonder E's new podcast, Disantel. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud from the buildup, why it happened,

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