Watch What Crappens - Family Karma: We Wish You a Merry Lopa

Episode Date: July 30, 2021

It's the season finale of Family Karma, and we need to level-set this very special episode. Things with Brian are on the fritz with Dr. Mons, and Vishal looks poised to win back Richa, but all we really care about are Reshma and LOOOOPA. Can a basket of French fries bring these women together? Who knows, man?Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watch What Crapins Add Free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chas, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Hello and welcome to Watch or Crap Ins, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to watch. I'm Ben Mandelker, you can also find me on the Game Brain podcast and joining me today, as he does every day, in fact, it's the wonderful and hilarious Ronnie Karam. What's up Ronnie?

Well, hi, Benoony. How you doing, home? I am doing just great. We are here today to talk Family Karma, Season Finale. What's going on with you? I almost spent a busy day of podcasting so far. We did some guest stuff. I went on the pink shade podcast to guest host today with Mary Payne, Mary Payne, and Ben was on that show last week. Last week. So we both got to catch up with Mary. So good check that out. It's called the pink shade podcast, really fun stuff. And then we did a show call, oh my god, I don't want to say the wrong thing. We'd love to see it. We'd love to see it. Yeah. And that was really fun. Emily and Claire,

yeah, and we talked about Emma and my island. What did I say? Emily's at Emma. Oh my god, I'm such a fuck up. I'm so sorry. It's we Emma. I'm so sorry. You just recorded like five hours worth of podcasts to support this episode. I think it was a big deal. Okay. I'm a disaster today. It's a lot of work. They were so fun, so funny. They're both Huff Poe writers, really smart women and do a really great podcast. So go check that out. That should be coming out later this week. So tell them what we talked about. F boy Island on HBO Malay. Yeah, I came out today.

It launched today, but we were fortunate to have advanced screeners for the first three episodes. So we go in it. It's fun. It's a fun show, and it was fun to talk about it with them. So thanks for having us on. Yeah, thanks everybody for having us up It was really fun and they feel good Guy And today is the end of family Carmo on Bravo So we have not been recapping the entire season. We did the first few episodes

Took a break because obviously too many shows on Bravo right now But we are coming back for the season finale. Yeah, and all the people have missed in the past. I think we only skipped three episodes and we missed a lovely proposal with Omrint and Nicholas. We missed Brian. So Brian is now, they've really leaned into this thing about like what's going on with Brian and Mons because Brian lost his job.

And so in the late season here, in the first part of the season, he was saying Q4 a lot, but now his new thing is talking about level setting. So last week, it was basically him saying, Mons, I'm just trying to level set with you. Just trying to level set your expectations. Well, that's why I want to have a level set with you.

So that's pretty much what everyone missed. Yeah, he had a big argument with her last week and I'm totally team Dr. Monica. Totally 100%. I think Brian's fine, but this whole like, I'm only 29. I'm like, what do people want for me? I'm a baby. It's ridiculous. And he's telling her last week, listen, you're stressing me out because you keep talking about Tampa, Tampa, Tampa. Well, yeah, but she was doing that ever since she started dating and you kept leading her on by agreeing with everything she's saying. And now he's like, well, I'm sick of being a yes, man. I'm gonna say what I want now. It's like, yeah, but you've spent six months

Saying yes, so you weren't being honest like everyone's saying, oh, he's being so honest that so we're we're fresh and on Bravo. Well now after he wasn't being honest for so I got very upset and he really didn't even do anything that wrong like on the scale of Bravo. But yeah, and he's fine, you know, but I was definitely team on and I was like run run doctor get the hell away from him because then he's trying to force her into moving there where he doesn't even have a job. Yeah, well, the subtext, I think, with that, with Bali and what's Omali and with some of these other people,

and really with several other shows where we see this happen, the subtext is, so I'm on a TV show and if I leave, I can't be on the TV show anymore. That's really what the conversation's about, right? So the other thing that happened, speaking of Mons, other Mons, Monica, she and Rich went to dinner and for like the first time

in like 15 years, Monica's dad, Raj and her mom, I forget her name, was it Anita or something? They all had a dinner all together. And it worked out well, everyone, so it was good. It was nice. Yeah, they decided the parents decided that they would be there for each other for the sake of their daughter.

Yeah. So, knowing that, we come into the season finale and Chitra and Anisha are just like talking a little bit about Anisha living at home for the past two years and we see some like fun cell phone footage of antics and fun stuff and it's kind of like we survived we did it and now we're friends and I was cracking up because Anisha says yeah so my friends are asking me why I am yelling all the time now. You try not yelling when you're living like this. That's so true.

I'm living around my parents. And so now my way of talking has just changed. It's like, you know, which way do I go? I don't just say, oh, you make a left up there and then a right and then it's home good. I say, well, first, when you pass the billboard for 7- eleven, you turn left, you're watch and you're watch and okay, are you talking on the phone right now, put the phone down and use the speaker, you're going to crash. Yeah, this will when you're when you're around your parents, there's a lot of unnecessary

communication, like, like if you're in two different cars, they'll often be a phone call like Benjamin. Just wanna let you know, the traffic is good on 684. It's like, okay, great, I'm already on the highway, thanks. It's like always like a human, human ways, you know, like there is debris in the road Benjamin up ahead.

Yeah, so then we see Anisha, she walks, we they're at home. And Anisha walks into the living room with this enormous coffee mug. I mean, it looked like she stole it off of the teacups ride. It does me world. I put coffee in it. So she's walking around with it. And her mom, Cheetah is in bed because she broke her foot. And so now, Chera's just basically bossing

on each of your around asking her for like a million things over text. Yes. And that's what mom's do. That's why whenever you're around your mom and she says, hey, are you busy tomorrow? Always say yes. I mean, as far as my parents know,

I work 27 hours a day, okay? Because I'm always busy. I just say busy. Because otherwise, it turns into three days of this. Text, text, text, text. Just like, it's happening on the show. And then go to the dry cleaner. And then go from the dry cleaner to get me some ice cream. And then go from here to there.

No, you will not control me like this. Yeah, and then this gives the producers an opportunity to do their favorite thing on this show, which is to fill the screen up with little text messages. They'd like to do that every other episode. They're like, look at this, look at this, Auntie. She loves texting, and then we do the whole, we get the text messages everywhere. Are you there? Are you there? Can you get me that? Can you get me that?

Where are you? And we find out in this episode that Anisha has another power move. One of her power moves we see this episode is that giant teacup. And I know that she's walking around feeling powerful, like look at me, I have more teeth than anybody else. But it really just says you need more comfort than anybody else, right? Like I feel like you're just insecure. Like you just need the most comforting tea.

And then her other power move is she does voice messages instead of texts and that's just a shitty thing to do I don't like it. It's very annoying because um if I send a text saying I'll be five minutes late you could look at that and you processed it in one second But when someone needs a voice memo or a voice message like that. Well, this is how it comes out Hey, um, just letting you know, first of all, I just drove by a crazy sign. You should see it when she were here. Anyway, I'm driving and I just want to let you know

I'm gonna, hold on, there's almost got to a car accident. Okay, I'm fine. I'm just like, oh my God, just get the points. It's like they're forcing your time, and it's just so obnoxious, and they always start like this. Hey, I was gonna text this, but it's too long to text.

Okay, then that's your first fucking problem. You need to get your shit together, and you need to abridge what you're gonna tell me because I have other things going on in my life than you. All right. And there's always a quip at the beginning. Like I feel like everyone leaves a voice note, always feels like they need to warm up the set.

Like always have to be like, so I just put a glass in the dishwasher and I was like, this dishwasher is clean. And I'm like, fuck my life. Anyway, I would be five minutes late. You're like, I don't need the, I don't need the first part. I'm also a fan of on another level.

It's like, okay, you can't text, I get it. Your fingers are just too fucking precious to text something out. Okay, fine. I'm gonna accept that premise. But the fact that you can take the time to monologue, but you can't take the time to actually call me and listen to my side of it.

Go to house with you. And on top of that, if there's actually important information, it's really easy to forget, to keep the message. So then, all of a sudden you go back, like, ugh, the stupid monologue. What was that thing she said? And then you go, and it's gone.

So you're like, oh, god, can you, like, can you reset this? And they sent you a new one. And now there's a new quip about like, so I was putting in my shoes and I'm like, why do I still have these shoes? These are from the 90s, am I right? Oh, and by the way, you were looking for that phone number.

Here it is. Seven one eight eight eight two two five five. It's like, what? You're like, uh, I had to, why do you say it so quickly, but you told us story about your shoes so slowly. Okay, so, um, Anisha frustration aside, um, basically she's ready to get the hell out of there away from her mom, right? And so the mom's like, well, thankfully, I had no an arranged marriage because this is a lot of thinking.

You know, this is very different. This generation has a lot more hoops to jump through. Yeah, exactly. So then we go over to Bro Poker Knight and the guys are all in someone's basement and they're playing poker. And there's like a giant, I think they're at the, I think they're at Dylan in Shantas because it's a giant picture like cut out of Dylan's head on like a stick and it's supposed

to be a substitute for the fact that he doesn't have a creepy sculpture and so they're all like laughing at him. V-Shall pretends to hump it and everything and they're just like, they're just doing this typical thing where they're playing poker and they're like oh, I got a straight like straight And there's no gay well. There's a royal flush. Ha ha ha ha. You know the usual stuff Yeah, um, and then they're they're growing out at poker. They're like bro bro poker poker. Oh, what are you bluffing? Bob hey give me your bluff. Hey, that's a rat. What's this tell what's this? Self and then someone wins with a maze high. I mean, that's so typical

I so like by the way, I liked Omra when he got his cards because yes, Dylan's like, you're supposed to have like a poker face. Like, that's not a poker face. Or he was crying, I don't know. But like, I loved Omra's total dedication to not having a poker face at all. Yeah.

Well, on our culture, poker faces sung. So to be fair, it's pretty dramatic anyway. So Omra and Vishal announced that they're having a party. So to be fair, it's pretty dramatic anyway. So they, Amara and Vishal announced that they're having a party. So like a big end of the season party But it's basically to introduce their new business which is underwear men's underwear. Yeah, underwear dance party specifically So they're gonna be having like a winter wonderland party where everyone has to show up in white's blues and grays and Then Amara starts talking about how he and Nicholas won't adopt a kid and it'd be kind of fun be having like a Winter Wonderland party. We're gonna have to show up in white's blues and grays. And then Umar starts talking about how he and Nicholas want to adopt a kid and it'd be kind of fun

to have like a baby Bjorn type thing, et cetera. So we're just talking about that, you know, boring shit. And then Brian, he starts talking about Mons and he's like, yeah, so, you know, with Mons, I just wanted a level set, you know, because like she wants all these things and like, you know, just wanted a level set. I mean, what's the point of being on two different levels

if they're not set? No, I'm saying guys. What is the point? Yeah. I'm like, well, bro, you know, she does have expectations and don't say, I mean, she has an ex self spreadsheet. Okay. And this also says, yeah, I mean, she wants to be three miles pregnant right now.

He's like, I'm 29. I'm a baby. Come on. I need to level set your expectations of how old I am, which is that my weird 29. Oh Brian. Um, so then... Like I get it, he shouldn't be forced to get married if he doesn't want to. Just be honest with somebody. Yeah, I just thought I guess he is being honest, but then when he is honest, then I'm still mad at him

for that. I mean, basically, I'm like Brian's boyfriend. I'm gonna be mad at you no matter what you do. So choose right or wrong, really doesn't matter because you're gonna get that Brian. So then we go over to a place called Chef Agvienz and Dom is sitting there and Rushmush shows up, you know, Rushmush is like, how's it going, man? How's it going? That's a going man and then we see

And Dorma's like, oh, you know, I've been fucking busy goddamn cock face, you know busy shit shit Had the girls over for cock night fuck fuck. You know, she's like a trash like a trash mouth which I love I love that yeah and she's saying so the what we missed in the last episode was that Lopa came over there was like an awkward thing with Lopa and Chitra because Lopa also had Chitra and and Darmus just trying to get them all together and Lopa said that Rashma didn't even call her on Diwali so Dharma really wants to smooth things over because they're gonna be a family and them all together. And Loppa said that Rashma didn't even call her on DeVali. So, um, Dharma really wants to smooth things over because they're going to be a family and families they're never going to survive if they don't have, if they don't get over this. So Loppa,

Loppa enters. And by the way, I love Loppa's new interview look. She has sort of like this black sequence. She kind of like a cabaret singer is down, you know, and a nice sort of shorter haircut. I think she looks slamming in it. I love that look for Lopah. So Darma's like, well, I was just telling her about having you fucking over. And I said, shit, we don't see that cock often. So we do, we do meet for fuck brunch or cock sucking whatever, but I haven't, you know, hung out with her, hung out with her.

And so the producer's like, well, you did know that Derma hung out with Lopa and you don't have a problem with that, right? And Reshma is like, um, well, man, I didn't think there was a problem. I have no idea what could even be wrong with Lopa because all I see is love and love for Lopa and complete respect. I have no idea why anybody's man. She's like one of those people who's just trying so hard to be positive

that she's gonna just go into a mall and start stabbing people when they. She is, because she, I mean, she has no accountability for her role in this feud. She's like, I have no problem with Loppa man. Like, what's the problem man? The official one. So, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, uh, so, Reshma, so, Reshma then sits down and I, and this is important to me because I noticed this before it was, it was brought up and turned on Lopa.

Is that Reshma sits down and then she starts speaking only to Darmah. She does not even face Lopa and she's like, because they, they ask of, uh, they're ordering water and Loppa says no ice. So then Rush goes, oh, I can't have cold it on, man. I make a joke that if you throw me in frozen water, I die right away. I'm like, that's, that's what the body does. If you throw it in frozen water, it dies. Okay.

Yeah, everyone dies right away. I was like, there's no joke in that. She's like, I have this joke that if you throw me into volcano, I'll die. Look, I'm dying from it. I'm gonna go into volcano. That's like, I have this joke that if you like throw me into volcano, I'll die. Look, I'm dying for me to volcano. That's like my joke. You know why? Because my teeth are very sensitive, man. Okay. I'm, uh, she's like, uh, twig. Oh, yeah, she's the Titanic. Yeah, I'm glad I wasn't there. Everyone is glad they weren't there. It's not like you specifically would have died of the Titanic, but everyone else was fine.

It's like everyone everyone did not do well there. Okay. I have this joke at this joke, okay? If you try my Yeah, so Lupa's like this is a family matter anyway. Like what is this bullshit, right? So the waiter comes and I just love watching these people order. They order like I want to order a salad french fries cheese. Yeah. Say it. Be close on the french fry this episode. The french fry vass get out of the world. It was a potato, it was a potato episode for sure. And so Lopez like this sweet and spicy shrimp is very good. I've seen the reviews which someone would know if they've ever called to see if I'm not dead. Oh, I love that!

Well, maybe if Reshma would look at me, she would see these wonderful shrimp that were well reviewed on, on yet, but alas, she has not because she has a petal of love, not my greatest singer, but it will work. So there's a group of guys in the bar area and they're being really loud. And Loppa is saying, oh you see how loud those men are? Well I remember the time there were only three of them and no females. They're looking for females. So Darmin's like, you need to fucking join them! Go fucking join the facts! Come on! Go get it up the ass motherfucker! Go beat it! Come on!

So Loppa is like, no, no, like this is the age when I need to be picked up. Ah! Loppa needs to be picked up sad Loppa. So then Dharma asks, they're talking in Hindi with each other. And so, she's, Dharma tells R Reshma. She's like, you speak Hindi too, don't you? She goes, of course I do. I just don't understand Hindi negativity. That's, I don't speak. So not really sure what anyone is saying. Thank God this isn't the Titanic. Yeah, because basically, Reshma is not engaging in the playful banter. That's happening, right? So then, um, giant fries arrive, big close up on the fries, a lot of attention on the

fries. And there's like some awkwardness about like, will like, cause Lopez like, oh, you have to try the potato. Ah, low potato. And then, right, low potato. Low potato. And reshmas like, well, I'll have this little bit here, man. I'll have this bit in the corner and it's like, ooh she won't fully commit to the potato, you know? Yeah, so Lopa, no one else is gonna start this, so Lopa does. She's like, you know Rashma I was thinking, you love your son, I love my daughter. My son is my baby. And darma is like, oh, yes, and fucking vice

are fucking first, right? Because I know that Rashma loves your cocksucking daughter. And you love Vishal that pussy of a man, right? And then we see a clip of the wedding or the engagement party where Lop is like, he's a moron. That guy is a moron. My favorite, it totally reminds me of my grandmother. So, um, so Lopez like, all right, all right. Tell me, Rishma, what are you happy with me? I'm out. What? What has Lopad done to make you mad? She goes, oh, I'm not unhappy with you, man.

I mean, you think I'm unhappy, man? Just because I won't look you in the eye, man. Just because I want to say hello to you, ever, man. Just because I won't say happy to Vali, man. I'm not unhappy with you, man. I mean, you think I'm unhappy, man? Just because I won't look you in the eye, man Just because I want to say hello to you ever, man Just because I won't say happy to valley, man. I'm not bad to you, man And now they're both doing it because Lopa will they're both only speaking to Dharma Which is super weird because they're talking like they're talking to the group But they won't look at each other at all and Lopa's like I don't get this, you know, and So rest was like, you know, everyone has problems in their life, man.

And Lopez was like, that's a lie! You get upset, small things about Vishal. There's small things you get upset. And she's like, quite of course, as a mother, it hurts to hear your child being called Names and small things. Like idiot. Yes, you know, that was one of them. You know, you get so upset about stupid small things, but you know, it's little things

He's a pussy has no penis no future Probably will drive a car into a tree. I don't know scared of scared of alligator and water Stupid small things, you know, I don't know you have to get over small things And she's like well, I think fissured needs to become more mature and he's a little bit baby You know and our boys are baby. They're all a little baby and term is like oh My fucking boy doesn't know how the fuck to shit. Let me tell you that much Talk about the fucking baby look at my fucking mother fuck us on right Here comes one right now.

Celebrity beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasai. And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the host of Wonder e's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the build-up, why it happened, and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feud say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and

Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It's snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this esteemed jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wondering Out.

So, uh, uh, Reshman's like, When? When, man, which parents would like to hear their kid call stupid and foolish, man? Huh? I would, Lopah! Ha, ha, ha, ha, it's fun.

Be sure. Yeah. So then, Reshman will tell us. Well, I refuse to put negative stuff in my mind, man. I do yoga, I do Tony Robbins. I don't subject myself to things that will mess me up. So love is like, listen, I want to be cordial. I may not like you, but you do and you don't like me, but we have to be cordial.

And Rational is, oh, well, notice when you talked, when you're talking, you talked to Dharma. You know, you know, you know, I'm that man, you know, I don't like when people don't make eye contact in cold water. I do not like that. Okay. When I am, when I'm in the middle of a forest fire, and I'm thinking, wow, this could kill me me I like people to make eye contact with me at the same time month and armad's like oh yes I was just saying you should fucking look at her and restaurant's like yes you see now I'm talking to her about you and I'm

not looking at you and that does not make sense to me so eye contact is important that's I contact her as important. That's number one, and Moopa just goes, oh, I can't believe it. I can't believe it. Lopa, whatever Lopa talks, she always talks, like she has a little piece of character in the back of her mouth, that for some reason, or like, or like, or be fat or something, that just not grizzled, that has not quite, she has not quite masticated down yet.

And at that moment, it looked like she choked on that grizzled, like, oh, yeah, she just kind of lost her mind, and I'm not gonna be most easy people to talk to Now look talk to this french fry and tell me how it feels Like you are not the easiest person to talk to what are you talking about? It's like you have literally built a picket fence out of french fries on the table right now I'm put it between you and Loppa. You're not easy to get to talk with, okay? So rest was like well because it's well, people think I'm a funny person. And she's like, well, I think that about myself too. So why don't you call and then we can go to coffee?

Just, oh, well, now that I know, I can just call. Did you hear I'm here? Did you know I'm here? What about calling me? You made no effort to call me. Oh, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. God, the robot! You just got your robot, ha. So, fresh music, I do make an effort, man. I say messages, I never hear back, man. So, like, I don't know, did your phone fall into a frozen lake because that would kill me a cat, and it would leave me to the end, I would die.

I don't know if it was me. If you really want to move forward, you have to stop bringing up the past. It's now, it's forward. Okay? If you were any kind of bird, I need you to be a Robin. A Tony Robbins. Okay?

I need you to please stop bringing up the past, okay? Because let me tell you something. If this were Titanic, I would be right. It's like literally the most past you could bring up. I just want to say that near far wherever you are, okay, that's enough of the Titanic. Like if this were the Lucettinia, oh my god, I'd be dead. So so Rashma base is like, Hey man, let's make a pact that would be a team and we'll give each other support, even though you called my son a pussy and a moron, which he is, but that's from the same mom.

And Lopez is like, okay, well, you know, when Risha is upset, to me, that's my world. And she's like, listen, I have to tell you this. I like you, Lopap. I like who you are, man. I like your insides. And look at Risha. Look whose daughter she is, the values

are there. I don't know how backhanded that was, but you know she's making an effort. And Darma is like, you know what, there's a lot of motherfucking love around here, okay? So here's a lot of love in both of you two pussy faces, okay? So let the love motherfucking spew, okay? Okay, so then we go over to Anisha and Dylan and She's like, I am the CEO of VoiceNowToney. Yeah, scream Yeah, and Dylan's like, yeah, she just doesn't like chronic overseas That is a very accurate depiction of his laugh so so then Dharma text cheats rise like guess what the mother fucking lunch went well with those two holes

So and he says over it and she she's like, Mom, I'm over your foot being broken. She goes, I don't care if you're over it or under it. That matter matters to me. It's like, you did this to yourself, mother. And she goes, yes, well, nobody pushed me. If that's what you're saying. So, and this tells her that they're going to have an end of year party, basically. Winter, Winter, and party.

And she's really looking forward to it, and she's just like, me too. She's like, you're not invited. So now they're gonna have competing parties. Competing parties, only one of the parties we actually wanna watch, the Auntie Party, hello. And by the way, Amazon just did a notification on my phone that is so Auntie.

It just, all of a sudden my phone lit up and said, here's an item that you might like, Oxford Good Grip's nylon slotted spoon, is an item that you might like based on your recent searches. Thanks, Amazon, for telling me about the slotted spoon. Like, Anisha, do you want a slotted spoon? Anisha, Anisha, you want a slotted spoon, Anisha? I mean, it really has just a lot of fun.

But it's so unbranded. But I just bought a slotted spoon, so I'm like, Amazon, don't you understand? I just bought one. Why would I want another one? I already have one, Amazon. I know. I think they're like, well, Ben, you just bought a discount Amazon version slotted spoon.

Would you like to try the XL? Yeah, so you can... I know. The things I bought in the Oxo slotted spoon, I really like I put time and effort into it. So I don't know why Amazon, this is why it's auntie because it's basically saying like so I saw you bought an Amaz I saw you bought a slotted spoon, but it was not of the quality that we like so your father and I were just want Just know if you like to buy a proper slotted spoon now

I'm so worried he's not buying the right slotted spoon so much pressure Hey, man. I have no problem with that slotted spoon. I don't have a problem with one So glad I don't have any problem with one. So glad I don't have a slotted spoon on the Titanic. That's why I thank they're trying to bail the water on the slotted spoon, son. So then we see people going about their business and the text wars begin between mother and daughter

inviting everyone to their competing parties. And then we see Dylan on a date with a pretty cute guy. And he's like, oh my God, I'm so single, I can donate blood again. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Hold on, I'm gonna get text. And Anisha is trying to voice text him,

or voice note him when she knows he's on a date. Ah, that Anisha. So, and poor Dylan, this is like, he has this cute date and clearly just totally cut out of the show. It just gets this one flash of a moment. So then, so now Richard and Vishal, or Vishal, sorry, I always say Vishal, as I've said before,

because I've got a friend named Vishal, but his name is Vishal. So Vishal is like driving and- No, I think it's- Are you sure? They call him Vishal. No, Vishal. No, I think it's are you sure they call him for sure? No, I think you got it backwards. I think you call him V-Shal on accident But you know somebody named V-Shal and this guy's name is for sure Gosh darn it. I'm just a couple of them V from now on and whatever I

Know this is for sure my friend and my reality TV show friend I don't know which is which anymore. V-Shal, or V-Shal. No, yeah, you're right. You're right. This is V-Shal. Yeah. That was really embarrassing for a moment there. Dude, we just all find out that the V-Shal, you know, is a gripe, they're friends. V-Shal, by the way, V-Shal's wife texted me to say that she was, she encountered Lisa Rina

at Starbucks last week and her that she was, she encountered Lisa Rina at Starbucks last week and her hair, she recognized her by her hair. Did I say this on the podcast already? That's why she keeps that hair. Yep. So, that's the news. Yeah. That's the news, man.

That's grind to save. So, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Some people say I'm funny. Just kidding. So then we go to Vishal and Risha, who's in a cat head band for some reason. Not really sure why. I'll tell you why, because this scene was filmed.

This was a Halloween scene scene because there was a pumpkin and hay out at the place that they go to. And they're trying to just like wedged into the middle of like a Christmas episode. I don't understand it. Okay, that makes sense. So basically he's saying, you know, you want me to make all this effort.

So now I'm gonna have a whole week of making an effort and see if I can win you back. Yeah, and so he's like, so, Richard, I know our parents had a good conversation and my mom saying she wants to try again with Auntie Loppa. So you know, and I just, I've stopped caring about what Auntie Loppa thinks about me and here's a flashback to show that. She has a flashback of Lopus saying, be a grown man! Oh, so she has a list of things that he needs to do. She wants a place to live, and she wants him to have his own place,

not be with his parents. She wants him to take his work seriously, and she wants to spend more quality time together. So the first thing is they go to the alligator park because he is crushing on Gator Boy Chris, who he follows on Instagram. And then we see pictures of Gator Boy Chris, who's just like muscular and short-list

and under water with alligators. And then V-Shall is like, yeah, he's really great. I'm, yeah, I'm, I follow him on IG. And then like Chris has to like, he takes off his shirt to get into the water. And V-Shallal's just staring at him and smiling. He is.

He's like, can we get a selfie? So funny. Richie, get your man. Get your man. Yeah, every red flag, Richie just laughs at. Every red flag to us, she loves about him. So you guys do you. So they do this alligator swimming thing

and it's really weird. I don't know why anybody feels the need to do you. So they do this alligator swimming thing and it's really weird. I don't know why anybody feels the need to do this. I don't I don't want to. First of all, I don't want to be swimming in basically like alligator poop water because that's what I saw. I saw this is water that an alligator just spent every like this. It's a small. It's like a kitty pool. So the percentage of alligator poop to water is pretty high and I don't want to get in that. Okay, I could just sit from the sides and look at the alligator.

Yeah, and you know it's like alligators, it's like they just ate a child and that's the poop. You know what I hate about alligators is that they are so scary and vicious, they're literally dinosaurs. Like you look at them as like this is a dinosaur and yet they make the most adorable stuffed animals and I just feel like that's so misleading.

Like why do you make such a, like if you are so vicious and terrible, why are you so cutely and stuffed animal form? I don't like that. Yeah, also like they make cute noises. They're like, oh, it sounds like cat purring. He's like, grrr, that, that thing, like I just, in general,

resent it when vicious animals turn out to be very cute and cartoon and stuff to animal form. Like a shark will do that too. Bears are obviously famous for it. But like, Gators, I just feel like, I just feel so misled by their cartoon versions, you know? Well, also I'm starting to just feel like everything is alive because, you know, Well, also I'm starting to just feel like everything is a lie because, you know,

I've said this many times, you follow one animal group on Facebook and suddenly you have every animal group in your feed and so now I'm seeing all these animals and they make all of these terrible, dangerous animals look great. They're like, look, someone's swimming with the shark. Hey, he's petting the shark. And then now this guy on Instagram with a fucking petting alligator is like, this is not good, you know, kids have the internet, okay?

Many people are gonna die because they saw someone go on a date and pet a alligator. And then you have like something like nature as metal on Instagram where they'll show an armadillo like pulling out an AK-47 and killing a duck and you're like, oh my god, I never knew an armadillo could be so vicious. So now we're all like heating the benign animals and you're like, oh my god, I never knew an armadillo could be so vicious. So now we're all hating the benign animals and we're thinking the evil animals or the scary animals are gentle and our whole world is fucked up. Now wonder where in this place that we are as a country

because we're all backwards with our animal fears. Yeah, so we're like, hey, let's just, you know who we should invite to our wedding? A shark. I love him. What a sweet guy. Like everybody's just, you know who we should invite to our wedding? A shark. I love him. What a sweet guy. Like everybody's just murdered. Okay, so the soul is scared, but he doesn't anyway, and acts like a badass.

And Richard just gets to make fun of him with the hot Greg guy or whatever. So then let's see, all the aunties get interviewed together, which is super cute, seeing all the ladies in one little interview room. Yeah, and the producer's like, who has the most fun? The aunties get interviewed together, which is super cute, single the ladies in one little interview room. Yeah. And the producers like, who has the most fun? The aunties are the kids.

The aunties like the aunties. So then we have Auntie Party. And everyone's showing up. And because Chitra is hosting it and she even invited Lopa. She says, well, you know, she's going to be part of this community in one way or another. So you know, you have to believe that I invited Loppa out of the goodness of my heart, which is her way of saying I didn't want to invite this fucking woman here, but I had to because I know I'm gonna be seeing her every day Yes, and so one of the aunties asks Dharama if Dr. Monica's gonna be there for Christmas and she's like, I don't fucking know fuck

I don't and then the producer asks if it's hard to watch Brian struggle and she's like, Yes, a little bit, but thank God I have my husband to fuck. So then they catch you a scene of her with her husband and she's like, You know, Brian wears his fucking card on his cock sleeve and he just needs some damn time, you know, the boy at his age. This is when they make a career I trust him, but there's so much fucking got cockpresser I mean, doesn't that motherfucker bitch realize it's cute for I mean, for crying out loud for crying for fuck's sake, what fuck's sake? I mean, how many times does he has to level the fucking set?

What is level set? What is it? So then my console's her and she just, you know, she just wants Brian to be happy. You know, he can just stay with me and say, I know, the motherfucking house, okay? She can stay on a fucking house and it's fucking shit bedroom. And you know, I can save fucking money. So it's fucking Monica, you know? I love that Family Karma is the most innocent show on Bravo

and we're making the most rancid recap of the week. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. OK, so then we go to the kids party. And they're setting up and talking about how they're going to get the underwear models out here. And they're going to get the underwear models out here and They're starting their underwear dance party business which turns out is go-go boy Go-go boy underwear right? Yeah, that's basically what it is

They they don't really get real models. They get go-go go-go boy models Which means they have great bodies, but there's it's they're just start writhing around and one actually falls off the stage at that I guess that's not right now. That's a little bit later. Yeah, but I mean, just in general, I guess it says something about the bars that I go to, but I just don't see like a huge market for go-go boys looking for fresh underwear. Because to me, it just looks like it's coming off anyway. You know they just wear that same damn thing every day. Yeah. Also, I want to point out that after all that talk about the dress code of supposed to be blues and solvers and grays and whites, that they totally violated it. Nicholas is

wearing maroon. Never seen maroon snow before. Nicholas. And I think that is V-Shall wearing black. I don't know. I was a little upset by that violation. Yeah. This whole party was kind of last last minute. And also, it's tricking me like you're saying, Oh, so with it's like a Christmas party, but then it's also my underwear part. You don't get to just spring that on me. Okay. Yeah. I need to be worn. So I know to be two hours late. Yeah. I think that like also this show, some of some of these shows on Bravo are kind of, um, they're falling into a trap and Roni is falling into this trap the biggest, which is that it's COVID, so they're obviously, you can't really have a lot of people at these shoots, so

when they try to do a party scene, it feels kind of flat and sad, because there's only like seven people there, and then you're like, oh, this is kind of lame. And Roni has been really leaning into the parties and so it's really, I think that's contributed to why the show has felt a little, like, did not, does not have a pulse for some people, where it shows like Beverly Hills, they're just going to each other's houses, right? So it's just a group going from one house to another house to another house, so you don't have that flatness, you know? And family karma is kind of falling into that. They keep having these parties and you're like, you're

like, oh, this is kind of adorable and sad. And coincidentally, it's the second sads male stripper party of the week, right? Because it just happened on real house. It's not to New York. It was like the saddest stripper party ever. And this is right up there, you know, to get to those in a week is special. So, you should show us up and talk about how all the aunties wanted to come. And then we cut to the anti party and they're frat, who's fanning themselves? Sean and Dylan's mom. Oh, Calpna. Calpna, yeah.

It has a hot flash. And Loppa's like, that's a menopause, baby. Yeah. And Cheat was like, you know, I didn't even know, and I came to this country. That's a menopause baby. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha to start to you like she thought she was dying she thought she was bleeding to that no one told her like what the hell people Come on It's scary so then Yeah, it is it would be very it's very scary so then Anisha back at the other party is like so I went on a date and

Then Chitra's like oh Anisha went on a date. And then the aunt, the aunties are like, with who? And G-TRA goes, a guy. Yeah. Um, so then, uh, let's see, the kids back with the kids, they're all taking shots and Nisha spills some on herself. And then, uh, they're talking about the date, yeah. And then the kids, she's showing pictures. And Omnit's like, did he send dick pics? And why did the aunties, they have the food, but then they have like 20 dominoes boxes stacked up. Did you notice that? I didn't notice that.

Unfortunately. It was weird. I'm not sure what's going on there, but there were like 20 dominoes boxes on the counter. And it just, you know, made me hungry. Obviously, this is our last day of the week. And you know what I do on the last day of the week. You better, you better, you better.

You better fire up that Domino's order thing. So then the big thing at this party, I mean, we're going to be like, oh, an Anisha one on day. The big thing is that Monica, Dr. Mons, isn't there. And so Brian's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, we had to level set her calendar and she's actually on call, so she can't make it. And Anisha's like, hmm, yeah, yeah, you know, we had to level set her calendar and she's actually on call so she can't make it and it's just like

Hmm, I don't buy that Dr. Monica isn't is on call. I don't buy that. I'm like Well, a maybe she just doesn't feel like going back to Miami for like the fifth time this week And also there is a global pandemic and some doctors are actually needed right now Yeah, go figure so then Bali shows up and like a crazy like Liza Manelli sued from the 80s. It was a weird choice. So she shows up and she's like, wow, Jennifer, I'm here because I am not me on day. I'm not on day. So then Monica and Rish show up and Anisha is like, oh, Rish, you look like Saks with Avon you Drake now.

And which is funny. Also, she's built her shot all over him. You know that Monica just hates this woman, right? It's her, right? Right. But now, wasn't you put on our Instagram a clip of them having a spat on, Watch Your Happens Live? Oh, yeah. OK.

So I was watching Watch Your Happens live and they had some of the kids on there. And it was fine. It was really innocent, of course. I guess they did this in lieu of a reunion. Anisha seems a little, you know, she's too much. Anisha and Bali are a little too much for me. Not at this point. I just had to say personal opinion injected. But Andy's like, well, let's talk about it. She's well, I guess so because there's not an episode 10. And he's

like, well, here we are now. You know, like she's showing up to work and complaining about, I don't know, I was getting a bad vibe from her. So he asked, at some point somebody asked, did the problem with you to start with the whole Anisha joking that you were sleeping in Brian's hotel room last season? And Anisha said, yeah, I think that is where it started. And Monica's like waving her finger. She is, no, on, that's not when it started. So, and he's like, okay, well, according to you, when did it start? And she said, there was just some real weird energy with Anisha. And I think one of the problems stemmed from me being so close with her mother,

because, you know, she was really close with Chitra. And so then Anisha just flies off the hand told she's like, what? How could you say that? Being jealous? Why would I be jealous? I mean, you're saying that I'm jealous? My mother loves me and I love her. So why would you say that?

She's like, well, I didn't say jealous. And then he's like, yeah, actually, if we rewind it, you didn't say jealous. Which she didn't say jealous. Which she didn't say jealous, but then Anisha just gets really pissed. And so they talk about other stuff, but they keep coming back to this, of course. And she's like, you know, I just,

I don't know why you would do that. Why would you do that here? I mean, say something like that to me. I mean, it's odd. Just, but I think it's odd too. She's like, yeah, it's, you know what? You're odd. And everyone's like, oh, and the audience is like, oh my God. She said, odd, she called her odd.

Not the other word. Right. And Monica said, well, you know, I think maybe it's a little awkwardness with me because you look at me as this traditional Indian girl and you're not, and I think that that bothers you about me. Well, she said that in season one, and he just said all this stuff already, but in each is acting like it's the most offensive thing, and that she just said basically that her mother doesn't love her. That's how this whole thing was playing out.

And then of course, Bali jumps in. And then they slut shame Monica. And they're like, well, I mean, I don't know how you're saying you're this traditional Indian girl when you're sleeping with your boyfriend. And it just, they went low and, you know, taking the temperature on L-internet. Everyone seems to be on Anisha's side. I'm not. I mean, I like Anisha better on the show, but I think they went really low with Monica.

I mean, she was asked a question. She answered it. It's not like you guys like each other anyway, but I don't know. I'm too Monica personally, but I know that I'm just one of like two percent of people. But it was it was pretty interesting, you know, I'll probably get a season three. I think they will get a season three because people really love this show, me included, and this season had some really powerful moments. So I think it'll definitely get a third season. I mean, that's amazing. It got a second season to be honest.

Yeah. So yeah, we'll see where it goes, but it was funny to have a little family carma drama. I mean, just what they get so offended about is nothing on any other show, you know? It's true, it is nothing. But then, what's cool about it is that in the world of family karma, like we understand the stakes.

So we understand when someone says, you're odd in the world of family karma, like we get, like, oh God, oh God, it just called her odd because in family karma, no one does that, no one says that. Like that's why when Loppa and Reshma sit down and they're like bristling towards each other and Reshma's like, I just feel like you don't talk to me that much, Mon. It's like, you know, help because in family karma, it's like, this is this qualifies as huge tension. And so we adapt to those stakes and then we we respond to them Yeah, it was pretty interesting, but I still remember last season too well

And I thought that Anisha and Bali were being really shitty Tamanica Amanica and he's just like I sorry Bali's like well, you know, I'm always like I was always there for you Like I'm always there for you. What are'm always there for you. Cause what are you talking about? You were never there for me. You know, you were never my girlfriend. You were teaming up with Anisha to come against me. Which is true. I mean, from last season, as I recall it,

that is what happened. And Bolly's like, well yeah, but if you're like, well, I mean, girlfriend with some money, you have to share with them. Which was the last season fight that they wanted her to admit that she was either sleeping with Brian or that she wanted Brian and she didn't. She was saying she doesn't want Brian and she wasn't sleeping with Brian and they're

like just being honest. And that was like the big fight last year. So basically they're still fighting about last year's fight. But I'm still team Monica even though she's a humorless little smot. I'm still on her side of this one Well either way, so on back to the show So there so now we have we go back over the aunties and the aunties are talking about You know babies and stuff and Lavina wants you know, they're talking about like, oh, the new trend is to have a baby but not be married.

And then, Thomas is like, yeah, and that and mother fucking circus, am I right? Mother fuckers, right? And LaVina thinks that, um, Bolly should carry Nicholas's baby, Nicholas and Amrit's baby. And they're talking about how they want the kids and Lopus like, well, I'm not raising any one's kid. I'll tell you that. And Kaufman's like, Oh, don't worry. Rest from us here to do a 24 seven. And they all start cracking up except for Lopa, of course. Yeah. So back to the kids party. There's gift bags. And then in one of the gift bags is an anal stimulator. So Molly has some like funny stuff

Talking about how she you know because two years ago she said anal is only for special occasions But now it's not for special occasions and we learned that she had an anal stimulator upper butt at kelpna's birthday And that omali can control it like remotely and was like I guess activating it during that birthday party Which is fun for her butt. And it's exciting. And then, Bali is talking that she's like, I am gonna move to Kentucky. I'm going to, I'm gonna move to Kentucky.

At some point, I'm going to, which means no, she wants to be there for season three of the show. Yes, she's like, I don't know. And then she just checks her wine so then Alicia is talking to Dylan about the ring and he's like oh my god. Let me see her hand Oh my god, you need an upgrade if you're gonna get a ring back if you're gonna put a ring back You need an upgrade and Vissal is getting everybody ready to show the underwear off and now it's time to see the new stripper underwear.

Yeah, as the go-go dancers come out, one falls off the stage and like, ah! But it's all fun and happiness and writhing and lap dancing. And then over, we cut over to the aunties also dancing. And Lopa busts out some moves. She's like doing kind of like, I don't remember specifically what they are,

but in my mind, it was like dancing like a chicken and then like a goldfish. She was sort of just like taking on the animal kingdom. I'm in Dharma's dancing round with a glass on her head and she breaks it false to the floor. So then the party's over, but not the episode. It's time for a wrap up of the Vishal and Risha storyline. So he's gotten his own apartment, everybody. And he's also a hire, so he basically, like the apartment is like surprise number three, right? Because number one was swimming with Gator's number two was starting a business. Number three is this getting an apartment and asking her to move in when she's in town.

And so he also gets a Mariatru band for the occasion because his dad has said earlier in the season that, you know, Marriottu band, like in Mexico, when he was living in Mexico anytime someone would propose a Marriottu band would come out or something like that. That was the vague outline of the story. So Richard arrives and he's Charles, like, so what do you think? What do you think? What do you think? It's fine, it's nice. It's like, well, you got an apartment.

Wow. Congratulations. She's so romantic. And he basically, they start talking about the house. He got her a gift and it's a book. Because for every year they've been together, every anniversary, he got her a gift and it's a book because for every year they've been together, every anniversary he gives her a picture book of their like greatest memories and stuff. And it looks like they have a great time together. He's like, remember last

year when we were like writing elephants together? This sounds great to me. What is wrong with you two? So meanwhile, he had told the Mariatru band, who the Mariatru band is hiding in the bathroom, the master bathroom, beyond suite. And he had told them that he's gonna say, Chee-ni, which is his like dog's name, he's like, so I'm gonna say Chee-ni, when I say Chee-ni, you guys come out. So we cut to them in the Mariatru band,

and they're like, wait, what's the word, Jesus? Chee-zi-its? Chee-chi-chins? Chee-z-chins? Chee-z-chins? wait, what's the word? Jesus, cheesy it's, cheesy it's, cheesy, cheesy, cheesy, cheesy, cheesy, cheesy, like what is this? So they come out, he gives them the code word and they come out and Risha just starts cracking up. She's like, serious. Wow.

And so she's like, all right, just give me the ring. Just give it to me, okay. He's like, but I'm not gonna force you. You can wear it around your neck if you want. She's like, no, just give it to me. For Christ sake, you're such a weirdo. How can I not marry someone this weird? Yeah, she's like, and you can pull a marry

out you band out of the back of the bathroom. I have to say yes at that point. So, that's how it ends. And so according to them, on to watch what happens, they're still together. And Brian broke up with Dr. Monica and February. Oh, sad. I guess they had a level set.

So that was it for the episode. Thank you all for listening. Hope you all have a wonderful and safe weekend. And we'll be back on Monday with a whole new week of Watch What Crappens. And don't forget, you can check out our bonus episode, which was a Crarapins on Demand episode, where we recapped my unorthodox life. So check that out and we'll be back on the next one. Bye! Watch What Crapins would like to thank its premium sponsors.

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