Watch What Crappens - GBBS: Matcha Made In Heaven

Episode Date: November 4, 2020

This week on The Great British Baking Show, the bakers must try their hand at Japanese pastries. The result: some VERY rude matcha haterade, a jiggly sponge, and the wee debut of Dizzy the Shuttlecock. STOP TRYING TO MAKE DIZZY HAPPEN, PETER. Hey guys, did you know that Paul went to Japan once?Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watch What Crapins Add Free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chas, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Hello and welcome to Watch or Crapins, a podcast about all that crap we just love to watch on Netflix or let's just watch, say bra the podcast but all that crap we just love to watch on Netflix or I just want to say bravo but also Netflix. Really anything on TV we're gonna watch these days. I'm Ben Mandelker from the Real House where there's a kitchen island and also the game

brain podcast and joining me is a hilarious wonderful man. The embodiment of Kauai. It's Rhonda Karram. What's going on? Well hello. Did I say that correctly? Kauai Kauai? Kauai? it's Rhonda Karim, what's going on? Well, hello. Did I say that correctly? Kauai, Kauai?

Kauai. I don't know. I don't know. I'm making her. What do you want me to tell you? I don't even know what you're talking about. Well, it was a part of the challenge today because we're talking about Great British Bake Off

and the Japanese Week on the show, which meant that there had to be Japanese delectables on display, including stuff that's kawaii. I hope I'm saying that. Am I just saying a Hawaiian island? But it's the- That's what it sounds like to me, but I don't know. I'll get to- I'll fuck that up once I get to it.

How about that? Okay. We'll move towards that. Okay, but in the meantime, right now, I know it is kawaii. It's spelled just like the island, kawaii. Anyway, but in the meantime right now, I know it is Kauai. It's spelled just like the island Kauai. Anyway, very exciting stuff. The point is this, we are less than a week away from, oh no, we're just, I'm just gonna just like mess up everything. I don't know. I'm deranged. I'm

deranged. I was gonna say that we're less than a week away from our live show, but that's wrong. We're a week the day away. On November 12th, next Thursday, we are doing these serious premier of the real housewives of Salt Lake City, and it's gonna be a live virtual show. Come join us. Well, it doesn't matter where you are in the world, you can come and join in and check us out. This is gonna be fun, because I think this is the first time that we are doing a live show where friends from different cities

can come together and watch us. So we're all gonna be a super fun time. Check it out, go to watchcraftpins.com for all the information. It's gonna be on onlohationlive.com. And I don't know, is there anything else we have to show before we jump into Japanese week? That's it, man. Okay, good, I found some Japanese week

on the British baking show. Now I love some Japanese food in general, but I don't really know anything about Japanese sweets. I've seen some of these sweet bun things that they make, but the only steamed bun, like the only steamed thing I have bread- wise is I think like a white castle burger. Because those are steamed burgers. I remember hearing that when I was young

and that's always stuck in my head. Like yeah, a steamed burger. Yeah. Yeah, I actually don't know very much about Japanese sweets either or Japanese baking. Yeah, because even buns, my familiarity with buns really is more on the Chinese side, with like, bow and things like that, which may be very, very close

to the Japanese side, but yeah, I actually, I'm woefully ignorant on this topic. Yeah, me too, and I thought it was, well, two things. I thought it was really funny that they go from brownies to this, so yeah, it's like quite a quite a step up on the difficulty level. And also this whole challenge is just a reason for Paul Hollywood to say, oh, that was just in Japan. And for him to finally express how much he hates Gerkens. Yeah, it's Gerkens. Also, someone was posting on Facebook and it was cracking me up saying that Paul Hollywood

is obviously standing on something to make him look taller because you never see his feet. And so during this entire episode, I was watching to see if you ever see below his knees and you don't. It's like when people are pregnant on TV and they try and hide behind bookshelves and staff. Or if you're Tom Cruise. Yeah, or Bert Reynolds or whatever.

Do you know that Tom Cruise, so if you go to Paramount Studios, there's like a fake city street. A lot of commercials, a lot of movies are filmed on this fake city street on the back lot. And the city street, it's all these facades of like, you know a city street. And they have these facades of like, you know, a city street. And they have different doorways for different sized actors. So that way, someone like Tom Cruise or like a Ben Stiller, like a short actor can film

in the smaller door. It's that way they look taller. I love that. I love that. That's so funny. I love crazy actors. I love the accommodations we make for them. Okay, I'm looking at short. I'm gonna look up short. Let's see. By the way, I learned this when I went on the Paramount Studios tour.

Okay, so if everyone's wondering like, that's a lie. I'm citing my source. The Paramount Studios tour, any other thing is that Tom Cruise used to everyone on Paramount Studios. and the other thing is that Tom Cruise used to, everyone on Paramount Studios, there's like everyone drives around a little golf carts because the lot is really big. So to get from point A to point B, you need to drive a golf cart. And Tom Cruise, his golf cart,

this is, now this is the scuddle butt that was on the lot. Was that back in the day, he would, he had like, plastic flaps on his golf cart, so you couldn't see him. But it's like, if there's any way to make people realize your Tom Cruise It's to be the one golf cart that has plastic flaps on it. I Just okay, well everybody I've come up with an answer Well, not about the box because I can't find anybody admitting that Paul Halle with Stan's on a box

But his height is five foot seven and that Paul Halle was stands on a box, but his height is five foot seven and Pruse height is five foot eight and a half inches. Oh, yeah He's definitely on a stack of magazines So I always say you know leave shortman alone because all my girlfriends like what are you looking for? Well, he needs to be at least six foot four. I'm like, oh, come on. How about you start with, he has a job and is nice to me. Can we start there and then get to height later?

You know, so I'm a big advocate of short guys, but I just love an insecure short man. I love it. I think it's so cute. Cause like who cares? Obviously people do care, but it's such a stupid thing to care about and like you can't do anything about it So you know, I guess bring a box bring your box to work day darling. Yeah

Yeah, bring a box to work day So it is bring a box to work day a bento box Because it's Japanese week and so we have a little skit at the beginning. It's no he's dressed He has like an anime mask on and he's's like, it's Japanese week, and then Matt comes out, he's got a mango on his head, he's like, you said dress like a mango character, and they're like, no, not mango, mango! And it's a rainy day in the tent, and Mark's like, Japanese week, who'd ever thought it'd make it this far? And everyone's kind of nervous about it.

And Marty's like, I don't know if it's unfamiliar to all of us, so it's more of a level playing for you this time, I suppose. Pfft. Pfft. She's so angry. Yeah. Yeah, she's saying like,

she's like, there's a lot that can go wrong. Always, always. It's like being a Viking on the high seas. Everything can go wrong at all times I love it So some other announces Japanese week and Knowles like we're very excited. We want you to make a batch of eight soft steamed bun Usually they're filled with pork or curry, but you can choose whatever you like and that's like no What would you fill your buns with? He's like, human blood?

Hmm, it's a family show. Dog blood? Better. It's Japanese weeks, or it'd be surprised if we didn't get... Hmm, feelings, but we know how these cooks are. They're wonderful! I'm supposed to, the bread must be soft, chewy roll,, but not too chewy and for God's sake, not dry. Here's what you need to have a good Japanese bun. It has to be chewy, not too chewy, it's got to melt in your mouth, and no...

GERKINS! When you bite into it initially, you feel a pull. I was like, okay, calm down there, boner paw. She is. into it initially. You feel a pool. I was like, okay calm down there, boner Paul. Of course the filling matters we want something that's delicious inside, but this is a bun challenge at the end of the day. So Dave is going to make chicken shaped katsu buns, katsu puri, and Paul is like, how long do you steam? Does anybody know how long to steam a bun?

Good luck, steep ins. Enjoy making an undetermined length of time to be steamed buns, idiots. So nozike devs won't be the only animal buns today. Hermine is gonna be making pandas and Laura's gonna make little piggies with sesame seeds for the eyes. And then Pete, this is the episode where Peter says we every five minutes. Yes, we. It's like love saying we in this episode. I know. He's like, well, I'm making some wee buns into wee lambs and the lambs will be the lambs can be wrong the unsire But as you know it's only a wee bit raw and my brother says that if I don't say we 35 more times before the end of the episode

I get no granola bars the entire week So Peter how are you going to infuse flavor? He's like well I'm gonna serve fry airmatics and add to lamb the mix with soy and fish sauce, but how? Well, I'm gonna color it black for the face of the ears and I'm gonna cut it up. We shape Wee the shapes, they look quite cute because of wee And what sort of vegetables will you be using onions wrong? We onions you messed up Stick to a theme god damn it. This was like biting into a bun that doesn't pull

So now the bakers have to prove the buns if you Undoprove them then it'll be bad and if you overprove them it'll be bad kind of like everything else You just have to prove them right. Okay. That's what we've learned you can't if you if you could overprove something Then you wouldn't have to prove them right okay that's what we've learned you can't if you if you could over-prove something then you wouldn't have to say over-prove and Peter's like well it's more than Chinese inspired than Japanese inspired but it's we and then Laura's like the Japanese element is the bun mate but this is more Chinese-lavid pork you know you fry it make it crispy I mean you can't put raw pork well it seemed buns now you know what you can put it in a

pizza I was waiting for you to say buts. Now, you know what you can put it in. A pizza oven. I was waiting for you to say, but no one said it, you know. How many goddamn times do I have to say pizza oven, mate? Laura must have a very dull life because she goes, you can't put Raw Pork Belly into a steam bun. I think it would be absolutely savage to be honest. I'm like, okay, well, yeah, I guess it could be savage. I think other things are a little bit more savage.

Oh, I was. Did you hear that new, did you hear that new morsey album? It's called Raw Pork Belly Nisteem Bun. So savage! Savage! I heard that, Mianna. I heard that for the Fenty show, Savage. Mianna was gonna have a whole bunch of pork belly buns go right down the runway and they're gonna be raw on the inside. Savage!

Yeah, ladies are walking around the streets wearing like raw pork. Unsteamed. So she's making eight little piggies with pork belly sticky sauce and proves like, tell us about it. Well, it sounds like it takes all the boxes to me. Let's talk about how that bun's gonna pull. Paul has a boner over Laura's sticky bun. She's like, well, you know, the pork belly and sticky sauce and there's gonna be some scallion. And he's like, go on, go on. Yes, yes, yes, no

go against. Oh, wow. Yes, yes. Oh, God, let me hold on. I almost fell off my box. Yeah. I would take a step back, but, you know, so he's like super excited. And I like how Prue asks him in such a judgey way like she Proo seems so sweet, you know, but some of the shit she says sounds so shady. She's like hmm. You've practiced Damn, Peru Damn, Peru so Now we have old mark and he's making Indian style curry And he's he gets himself like he gets himself up into a tizzy.

Like I really can't understand what he says because he actually has like a little bit of a speech impediment and he's got an accent and he's also excited. So he starts talking about like how, he's like, well, we tried some jasmine. I was like, the jasmine was wonderful. I was like, I was doing this with jasmine. I was like, what are you trying to do?

I was like, what? We're all for the enlightenment, huh? I was like, hmm, I'm like, I was doing this with Jasmine and the day, I was trying to do it a bit of it, I was like, when I was, what, we're all for the delight, but I don't know, I'm not just saying, I was like, mmm, I'm like, what? He says, you know, my children like to eat this. And so we, I'm calling it the hmm, because I feed it to them, and we all bite into it at the table, and then we all go, hmm, so these are my, hmm,

dollar steamed buns, because we said, hmm. So these are my, hmm, Dolls theme buns. Cause we said, hmm, do you get it? And please like, hmm, things that's making you go. Hmm, doll. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, Now, young mark, he's making a vegetarian filling. It's gonna be burger buns with beef min a little girkin. Aren't they those little mini pickles? They're mini pickles, but they're sweeter. So if you don't like that sweetness, especially because there's girkins and cornichons which are pretty much the same things.

But when I'm- Cornichon are real salty. Well, they're kind of the same, but girkins are definitely like when I bought girkins, because I was like, they're the same, but when I buy girkins, they're like super sweet and the Cornishons are a little bit they're just a little kathas and more balanced. Oh cold as soon if you will. So they're both Matt, blah blah who are we talking about? Mark and Ladi are both doing little burgers. They're they're making the shapes of a burger so they're going to try and make it look like a little burger

and um so no's like well I'm being so funny right now with Mark. Gurg and Gurg and Gurg and can't make a Gurg and maybe murder a Gurg and spit its blood all over the wall. Just please don't heat. Please. I love how he really leans into his eating disorder and this. Yeah. It's like, well, I love looking at food, but eating is disgusting. I know. Well, he's wearing very, very tight jeans this episode. So I think that he's like really feeling, he's like, this finally, this disorder is bang off.

I can get to my dark jeans. Yeah. So Ladi is doing a burger also. And so there's like some banter behind it. Like Mark's like, bigger off, Lotti. It's a burger off, you bigger off. And I mean that I'm not having played with banter behind them, like marks like, bigger off, naughty, it's a burger off, you burger off, and I mean that, I'm not having play with banter with you,

I mean, you actually go burger off your stupid face, stupid person from a tiny desk. And Lali's like, well, our burgers are pretty similar. So if he gets Paul's handshake, I'll be really happy for him. Promise. So she's doing a cheeseburger in her steamed buns and adding some spiralized chips. And Pru's like, oh, might be a few chip eaters in this group.

Oh, chips. But Ladi is also adding gherkins to her as a Pru's like, oh, look at little box man. He hates gherkins. In contrast to baking, which rises, steaming raises moisture levels. So you have to be more careful. And David, Dave, of course, is like, well, I need to thicken the sauce so it's more of a pace and the steam reintroduces liquid because that's how steam works, learned it in Mexico.

I learned it while I was waiting for my tacos in Mexico. Basically how you cook a tamale, if you will. You may have heard of something called fajitas, those steam also. Well, they're really sizzling, but the sizzling creates steam. You see steam is water that's evaporated. Yeah, learn that in Mexico too. And the Armenian is making chicken pandabas. Yeah.

And it's going to happen. Heres have shittake mushrooms and chicken and fresh chili. And Paul's like, well, how are you feeling about Japanese weak homie? And because you are one of the most consistent bakers thus far. Consistently stupid. I'm on a box. Yeah.

You're one of the most consistently not on a box people in this competition, Maryine. She's like, thanks. It's like it's new learning journey, but for my research, I found Japanese speaking has French influence and Japanese French speaking French. I didn't understand what she's talking about. She said that Japanese baking had French influence and so she's hoping to draw on her knowledge of French participatory for this challenge. And Bruges goes, we'll have to see if that works.

Spoilers noted both, because this is Japanese cooking. I'd hate to be rude, but did you practice? I hate to be rude, but you do know that Japan is not the home of the Eclare, right? So then halfway through, be careful how it works. You don't want to look silly on TV. And those are all coming out of the proving drawer and everyone's assembling their buns. And Lottie has to remember to do a gurg and free bun for a poll otherwise it could be a disaster.

And then we learn also that the feelings have to be centralized in the bun, because if it's Tunio at the top or the bottom, it could split the bun, which is really a phrase that's used a lot in gay sex. So there's that too. Yeah. I had to say it. I had to say it.

It was too easy. So Ladi and Mark are messing about, do you know? So, well, I have to be precise, but Mark's not doing chips, so I've got that up on him. He's like, did they ask for chips? Oh, he doesn't want chips, Mark.

He doing steam chips in. Yeah, I'm doing steam chips, mate. Yeah, good one. He's like, well, one of them's going home because they're two friends. Like, they're having too much fun. They're gonna be like, get rid of one of the happy ones. Yeah, exactly.

And Peter, meanwhile, he's like, well, it turns out that I made a, I made a wee mistake because I think I made a wee bit too little batter because I've run out of mixture in the seven buns. So brother will not be happy with me. He will not be happy at all. Just got to his brother like his face up against the tent, just like cans clawing at it like So then we go to Laura making her little piggy eyes and Marcus wrapping his steamed buddy Steam buns to make it look like a hamburger patties in there and everybody gets our steam bowls out and The narrator whoever it is. It's like what's the lit is on the steamer. It needs to be airtight

The bakers won't discover how successful they are until they come out. Don't, don't, don't, 10 minutes long. Aladdin's like, well that's good because I've got 9 minutes left on my big. That's right. These thin buns are brought to you by the letter S as in Sodonic. This is like, you know, cakes are boring. They're like, say that's the camera. Cakes are boring. Enough with the cake. Just go ahead and say it loud.

And then Mark is just spiraling. Young Mark, he's like, well, patience is a virtue, but I always lifted him practice and now I'm a bit worried because I lifted him in practice. So I don't know how long my cooking time is based on me lifting it. I'm like, Mark, what are you talking about? And then we see them start to open them. And some of them come out just humongous, you know, Laura's come out really big. And they look okay at first, but then they start looking like molding, like they're molding or something.

Yeah, they're, yeah, some are just like really enormous and some are bulging because of that issue where the filling was too close to the top of the bottom. And, and a lot ofadi is not happy with her. She's like, mocks are better than mine. Live it. Live it. So I'm so angry making such beautiful little buns. Yeah. Commissions. Here comes one right now. Celebrity beef. You never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court.

I'm Matt Bellasife. And I'm Sydney Battle. And we're the host of WonderZnew Podcast, Disantel. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud. From the buildup, why it happened, and the repercussions. What deserve session with these feuds say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selina Gomez and Justin and Haley Beaver, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selina talking about her laminated eyebrows.

It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up any time soon, despite both Selina and the Beaver's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the amazon music or wonder yeah judging time so crew comes over to him mean and she gets them her chicken bun and crews like well you need bigger eyes for the

panda so sad for the panda unfortunately you didn't practice panda eyes did you want to practice her normal laugh baby she's just laughing like like you stupid, stupid lady does this look like panda eyes to you? Oh dear And pause like it's not panda-ish. It's not But I love it the bread is so soft, but a little chewy and the filling is just delicious Oh, yes full of flavor and the bun the shaping could have been better But look at the shape of this bun. I mean really. I mean, but of flavor and the bun, the shaping could have been better, but look at the shape of the spun. I mean, really, I mean, but the flavor is very good. So there we go onto Mark and Paul's non-gurkin bun.

He did not have sesame seeds on it, that's how it was delineated and Paul's like, but I wanted to say that to him, you see it. So Prussac, where has good flavor? The burger is quite dry though. But I guess I would say this is pretty terrible, but it has nice flavour. It's like we have the taste of score, the bun is good, slightly chewy, not pulling smooth top, simple, highly effective, no one's pulling me, you're dead in the water. Alright, now let's go onto Laura, too much filling in your dough. These pigs look like they've been at the star way too long

If you know what I'm saying taste lovely bit dry taste beautiful I don't know what else to say. I'm gonna step off my box I'm in Mark with the sea mark with the seas Now the steamed buns Now, the sting burns. No. Well, they just look lovely. If we were looking for oversized buns that are ridiculous, they look lovely. Yes, they were spending a little too much time with the steamer. They're so big. Paul, you should try that before the next episode. You wouldn't have to stand in one spot so often, darling.

He goes, they're too big. Just angry. He has a real resentment about things that are too big. Yeah, he's our man. He's like, I hate these soul buns. He's like, they're too big. She goes, well, I don't mind them being too big, but then he can, I'm greedy. Woo.

So then Dave's chicken shaped chicken buns. They'll both love the addition of the color. Very neat. Bold, well-shaped, shiny, smooth, not a techy toe. Good job, Dave. Dave's just like, boop. Dave always looks so afraid that they're going to hit him. Yeah, he really does.

He's just gonna get that red in the face, and that nervous woodland creature eyeball thing, where he's like, am I okay? Is it okay? Yeah. Love the chicken, the bun is lovely. We could've had more feeling, more curry, but very, very good.

Nice, look at this arch. Look at this arch. This is delicious. my only gripe is it's coming through But thank you for making a short button. Thank you Next time maybe do without the tiniest and breras So now we got a Peter sheep Which were really cute there was like it was like a seven white sheep and one black sheep, which was adorable which were really cute. There was like, it was like a seven white sheep and one black sheep, which was adorable. Um, but he apparently had some sort of air pockets that had shrunken and then they shrunk back in because the air pockets and it caused some sort of creasing or something like that because

it's not taught around the meat. Look, it's pulled away. It's pulled away! There's more meat than dough here, which this is a baking show. Alright? None of us have more meat than dough. Alright, get it right. You're gonna be on this gas. So then up to Latte, and the hers look really cute because they look like little burgers because she decorated them that way. They look like they have lettuce and stuff and prunes like bacon, cheese, burger, relish, bun, tent, lady, man, grass, hand, foot, it's like prunes, stop, I'm sorry. relish bun tent lady man

grass hand foot's like proves that sorry I was just saying burger things now latte it looks good but here's the problem now it has to taste good

latte do you practice and I was like well it's like a dry burger spot on if you like dry burgers. She's like, well, it went in rows. So it must be very difficult to do the steaming. Yeah.

And they compliment her on her bun. They said it's beautiful how it wraps around the filling, but Paul's like, yeah, dry burger. And then Lottie's like, well, he said mama's dry, but if you didn't it with the relish, then it wouldn't have been as dry. It's just get us here to his face Peter looks suicidal by the way, well he watches anybody else get a compliment He gets so pale So now is the technical challenge hello bakers

Today's challenge has been set by the lovely poo All right, when you read this recipe, do not panic. There's nothing you know that you haven't done before, except for the entire recipe. Good luck! Yeah. Um, so, no, it's like she says, don't panic. That definitely means panic, hmm? Matcha crepe cake stacked one on top of the other, layered with strawberries and white chocolate in our screen, topped with edible flowers,

Cinderella slippers, butterflies and rainbows. Go. And Dave's like a match a crepe cake. I haven't even heard of that. Not even heard of making a cake out of crepes. Is that like taking a bunch of tortillas and stacking them and then forced them on them?

That's crazy, even for Mexico. So Paul and Pru are eating their sample versions and they look crazy. They're like a big green kind of broccoli shape. It looks like a beret. It looks like a beret made out of Kermit the Frog. Yeah, it does. And matcha tea, whatever, it's just bright green.

And she's like, oh, matcha always cuts sweet mess. She's like, well, I see a few things going wrong here. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, where do you think the beggars are going to go wrong with this? Because I can see a few things. Consistency being number one. OK, go tell it, and I'm going to laugh every time you say about where they're going to mess up.

But I would be a terrible fly they turned it. All right, welcome to the plane, everybody. Get your goddamn seatbelts on you idiots. Now, a lot of things could go wrong today. All right. You might feel the plane everybody get your goddamn seatbelts on you idiots now a lot of things could go wrong today All right, you might feel the plane shaking that means you could be dead soon So you can see something fall out the top make sure you're damn make sure there's one on you before your child Because really who needs to save children the disgusting little creatures alright don't die if you need me Don't think I'm not tinkable

All right, and just be prepared for when you ask me for a cocktail I'm gonna stare at you for a second too long and then shake my head as I pour it. Lady without his seat belt I'd just like to say one word to you. Dry your dry. Enjoy these dry peanuts. I'm gonna throw down onto your trays if I resent every single fiber of your being. So Matt goes to check on her mean and she's like, well you know, matcha as a drink is good,

it has antioxidants and he's like, I hate antioxidants. I'm very antioxidant. Yeah. And Laura, she's like, I actually hate matcha. I mean, why don't you just eat grass? I mean, why does God even provide something edible that you can't even put into a pizza oven? All right, it's stupid So they're going through you trying to figure out what the hell these recipes are telling them to do. Laura's flinging butter around Yeah, they're melting chocolate and stuff and Peter is

Peter is like they have to make a Swiss meringue and Peter is like, they have to make a Swiss meringue and Peter is like, well you're supposed to heat up your eggs in sugar over banhmarie whilst what while whisking that so the sugar's all dissolved and the eggs are getting nice and frothy and oh did I get that right brother? Did I get that right? He's gluten free, he's very angry right now. Oh so they're all making their crepes and freaking out because these are very difficult and they've only got enough batter to make them exactly right. And so Peter's like, uh oh, it's fellow bros, so he's going to become a small pancake. Oh, God, I'm going to die. His crate falls apart and he says like the way he curses is exactly how you'd expect

Peter to curse. He goes, crums. And, and no, is just trying to get people to flip their crepe with the pan because they're all like Take picking it up with their fingers and flopping it over and he's like do you want to you want to flip it? Flip it. You want to flip it like no, I can't I mustn't I mustn't flip it flip it Hey, you've got to do it with one man hand man come on It's how they do it in Mexico, Dave. It's how they do it.

It's like, fine, fine, Mexico. So who's next here? Laura's like, Laura's running low, because she's made her stay thick. But only half an hour left, better do the filling. So now strawberry layers, and then they have to like, get all this shit into the bowl. I'm as scary as hard to watch it. I'm as scary. It's hard to watch it.

I was stressed out. It was very intense because all those crepes were sort of questionable and they again a lot of them were running out of batter and then they yeah, then they they had to put it into the bowls and and then they put it in the bowls and then they have to put in the freezer to set and then they have to turn it out and when they put it in the bowls, it's a remove the the paper that they lifted it into and then they got to turn it out. And when they put it in the bowl, it's to remove the paper that they left it into and then they got to dust it with matchup powder. And you think that the hardest part would be over. Once they finally turn it out and put it out,

you think that'd be the hardest part. But apparently the hardest part was trying to understand what a crescent of fruit was. Cause the directions say, put a crescent of fruit on top. And everyone's like, what's a crescent of fruit? What does that mean?

Yeah, even I knew that one. Yeah, Dave was like, what's a crescent of fruit? What does that mean? Yeah, even I knew that one. Yeah, Dave was like yeah, Dave is just like he's like, I don't know what a crescent is So I'm gonna go for seasons How do you not know what a crescent is there? Laura's dropping fruit everywhere and flinging better and Now it's time for the blind taste testing. They were expecting an exquisite crepe cake. What did they get? So they start with Mark with the K and...

It's like not perfectly folded. The strawberries too thick. They need to be really thin or they get wet and slimy. Yeah. His was all janky because when we saw that the model one that pruned forward, They need to be really thin or they get wet and slimy. His was all janky because when we saw the model one, that prune, Paul, we're eating it was like very clean, very clean lines, it was kind of beautiful.

And then marks, marks like an animal was hiding under their carpet. Just sort of like lumpy and folds and everything. And it's like, oh, that's not good. Yeah. And then Dave just starts gulping in terror as they go over his. It's not really a blind taste test if you're over there.

Like, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. Paul's like, well, there's a lot going on here. It looks like a fiesta of some sort. Wonder who did this one. Okay, and by the way, we did ask for a semi-circle. You idiot. Easiest part of the whole damn challenge. Hmm, and for you it's like not well decorated. I'm out of witty things to say. I have this to say this sucks.

How do you say this sucks in Spanish? This is a Saki To. And her mean has made a full circle of flowers and Loddy's next and Paul's like, well, this is a bit needed, but too much coconut. I mean, let's celebrate the matcha, not coconut. You might as well throw a bunch of gikens on this stupid thing. But it's really good delicious. Yeah, and she and the layers were all great. And then Peter is next and Paul's like, well I quite like this one. Very nice flavors. Oh, when I eat it, I taste fear.

Who is this? Peter, is that you? Why are you trembling? I feel a gluten ghost hanging over me, threatening to stab me with a toothpick if I don't love this one. Now, just a reminder, we did ask for a crescent of fruit and this one has the word we spelled out in strawberries. So they get to Laura and they're like, oh it's so small and thin, hardly any layers

to quake us so thick and it's just too chewy. And Laura's looking at them like, fucking kill you in your sleep, mate I'll tell you what I'll tell you what's chewy my attitude after I'm submitted to matcha matcha matcha Yeah, and then mark with the sea To thick layers buddy SARS Um, tooth-thick layers, buddy. Sars. Yeah. So now we, the, the order in from last to first, last is Laura, then Mark,

young Mark, I'm sorry, old Mark, then young Mark or Prugos. It's just very ugly at the side. Add that in there for fun. And then it's her mean Dave Lottie and first place goes to Peter. It's a model. It's Hermine, Dave, Lottie, and first place goes to Peter. It's a model. It's a model. Uh-huh. And Pete's like, absolutely chast.

Yeah. It's like I'm going to steep a lot easier tonight, especially knowing that my brother won't kill me. And Laura's like, well, somebody's going to come back coming last, don't they mate? All right. And then things don't go well. I've always got the pizza up, and all right.

Yeah. So next up, who will be saying say an aura? And Matt's like, Paul, I know you've been dying to say this. So here's another chance. You were in Japan. He's like, yes, yes, I wasn't Japan. You know, and I'm just surprised how decenties things were because you know I've had them Japanese style before. So I've had them actually in Japan. So Laura is at the bottom and Hermine is in the middle and and Mark with the K is in the middle and he said they could float up or down depending on how many of those steam buns they've had. I'll tell you one thing that also floats up or down.

My box, it has a little elevator. But you know, I was reading the old Facebook, my only news source, and people were saying they don't like Mark and that he's an asshole. I'm not saying what? What did we miss? Because usually we love to call people an asshole on this show. So I don't know what we miss, but I guess there's people that don't like him. He literally spends the entire season just laughing in the corner like

He just does that the entire time. Yeah, and when he's talking it's like in a it's in the sweet little sort of semi Irish accent Oh, so now it's your favorite thing the kawaii cake Kawaii cake is old things cute and charming all right, so all things cute and charming, alright? So they are the flavors, the type of sponge and the decoration take inspiration from Japanese cuisine and pause like, think animation, think cartoon. Think about my most recent visit to Japan, which was recently.

Hahahaha. Um, I need it to be highly decorated, quite vibrant. Meet. And a world traveler. Like me. Anyone? Any questions about my trip to Japan? Would anyone like to see my science-y-d from Gwen Stefani when she was in her Harajuku

girl phase because I was part of that, emotionally? So the judges go over to Mark with a K first and he's gonna make an avocado cake decorated with little emojis Which sounds cute and then one of them's gonna have the seed like it's pregnant with a little avocado baby Yeah, it's cute and and so They're like okay, I'm pretty like well getting in touch with your feminine side But by making little cute avocado babies, you're so silly. I'm pretty like, well, getting in touch with your feminine side, but by making little cute avocado babies, you're so silly

I'm wasted. I had a good amount of whiskey in between challenges And Mark with the sea is Wanting to make a toasted soybean cake which just sounds delicious. Yeah, and he's using matcha and rose water So yeah, baby this one he'll call hmm Yeah, and he's using matcha and rose water So Yeah, baby this one he'll call hmm stall for question mark And David's doing yoke short for yokehama a Japanese city

Yes Mexico The first time I visited yokehama was when I was in Mexico and I was at a taco stand waiting and I said I wish I went to Yokohama but I was really in Mexico. So Mark is making his border terrier, Hamish. Hamish. Of course he has a border terrier named Hamish and it's gonna be Levin Swiss meringue buttercream with a honey and tahini sponge and ginger and soybean powder And paus like how's it going to look like a dog? It looks ridiculous

And then over with Pete He's like, oh, you know the texture is gonna be like a kitchen sponge and Laura's is a chiffon sponge. It does have the potential to collapse like my dreams today mate. And Laura's like, I'm making a cotton jiggle cake into a toast stool. Oh cotton jiggle cake, that's exactly what I

pockhole hole Hollywood every episode. Get over here, you cotton jiggle cake, the box is ready for you. You know the reason it's called a jiggle cake It's because it's like a souffle pru. I fucking know god damn it. Get this woman out of here. I'm trying to work Well last time I was in Japan. I didn't have to have an education from some old dingbat about jiggle cakes. I just ate them and Lotties like yatta gamble and then hers is gonna be called into the Japanese woods.

And then let's see. Got to love a Sanhaim reference in the middle of all this madness. Yeah. Into the woods, into the woods, into the woods, into the woods, into the woods, into the woods, into the woods. Oh, shut up. Into the woods, into the woods. So her meme is closer to home. She's, she's like, well, there's a Japanese garden

when I have lunch because it's quite peaceful, so I'm gonna make that. Yeah, that was her thing. Was that she works in your garden. And then I love the challenges. Like, okay, make something really cute. It has to be super, super cute and cheerful. And she's making this dark, moody cake

with a decorative gase. I'm like, okay, that's, I guess cute for someone. Yeah, she makes a really dark themed one. So time to get the cakes into the oven, sponges in the oven, guys. So now they start working on their fillings. And this is where we learn about Peter's very, very strange idea for this challenge that

he like really dives into and is like very, very excited about it, perhaps more than anyone else. I think so he is, he's making a cake called Dizzy the Shuttlecock and the way he talks about it, you would think that Dizzy the Shuttlecock is like a beloved cartoon that has like captivated British audiences for 50 years. He's like, oh, Dizzy the Shuttlecock. Yes, yes, it's Dizzy the Shuttlecock. It's gonna look really, really cute. It's gonna look like a little anthropomorphic Shuttlecock that has a little bit of a hit on the head with a racket. So we're seeing stars and has a wee bump on his head, his little wee head, his little wee bump, his little Shuttlecock. That's got hurt, it's a stupid little shuttlecock. Alright, you're making me a little uncomfortable, so let's calm you down by talking about hobbies.

You teach badminton dear to children. Maybe you can teach my daughter, she's too. How young can you teach badminton? She's like shuttlecock's. You know where shuttlecock's only used left wing of the goose, the shuttlecock's shuttlecock. Alright, now listen, this is fantasy land with you today. I mean, look at you. Shuttlecock, you coach toddlers to play badminton. I think I'm right in love with you, actually. Oh, really? You know who I'm in love with?

Dizzy, the shuttlecock. He's such a stupid little shuttlecock. You know, I taught a wee boy who is three-how to play badminton. It was wonderful. I kept waiting to tell him about Dizzy, the shuttlecock. Now, by the way, Dizzy, the Shuttlecock, he got hit in the head with a racket. So he's seeing stars as a bump on his head. What the hell sort of Shuttlecock are you? That's your job, Shuttlecock.

You were supposed to get hit by the, hit on that with a racket. You're supposed to thrive in that environment. He's Dizzy, the Shuttlecock, man. Yay, don't tell him who he is. He's a Dizzy Shuttlecock. So then Laura is Don't tell him who he is. He's a dizzy Shuttlecock. So then Laura is gonna do an upside down pineapple cake, which I think we've already done,

but she's like, but it's gonna be upside down pineapple cake. So the pineapple is gonna be upside down. All right, do you get it? See, what, okay, let me put it to you this way. Have you ever taken a pizza oven? I'm put it upside down. Of course you have, because it's ridiculous. So this is a ridiculous challenge

and I'm doing it in March. I fucking hate the shit. So I'm out, it's like yesterday was challenging for you, wasn't it? She's like, oh, you know, in my head, I'm already going home. And he's like, oh no, I'm feeling so positive about it. Really, did you see the shuttlecock person?

I'm really just lighting up. All right, I'm gonna be fine. So halfway through, and her means, like, something's coming out that staggy, and then Laura, she pulls some sponges out of the oven, and she's like, well, this one's halfway collapsed, so, well, it's okay. It's a backup, and then she just like,

no, this is Paul just staring at her. Like, it took me five minutes to get onto this box, so I'm not getting off at any time soon. Until someone comes to move this box, I'm standing here staring at you like this. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm So now they're doing the decorative stuff, and Mark's just cracking up at himself about his avocados. And the other Mark is making bones for his little dog. He's like, I'm making bones because Hermes is a naughty boy. I made these bones, and then the thing is that he ate the bones. And I was like, well, I think it's because they're in the shape of bones. Well, that's why I called them, um, bones like, hmm, he ate the bones.

And Ladi is doing a cherry blossom tree mold type thing. And then Matt goes over to check on Hermine and he's like, have you been to Japan? No. Would you like to go? Because Paul said he'll take the winner to Japan. No, would you like to go because Paul said he'll take the win into Japan? Really? Really? One hour left. So now Peter is stacking his cake and and Nol is He's taking a cake and Nol is trying to sorry Dave is trying to do some sort of spiral thing He's like filling in something with a spiral and Nol's just like just pestering him and Dave is trying to do some sort of spiral thing. He's like filling in something with a spiral and no one's just like, just pestering him and Dave is getting so mad.

It was like really gratifying to see. He's like, you gotta mess up my spiral. And Laura is crying, which I didn't like Laura crying. I don't like that. Okay, it's up crying. Cause she's messing up her fondant. Yeah, she's having a really nervous about her fondant going up on top of her pineapple. Yeah, is that what it looks neat? Like no, it's a suppressor. Like I can't

but the presser is like, come on, just keep going. You can do this. I believe in you. Your dough, which made their sauce and cheese on top about to go into a pizza oven. I feel better. I can finish this now. Thanks, mate. Thanks, mate. Thank you. So yeah, so she's really nervous. The pressure's getting to her. There's 10 minutes left. Marcus dressing.

Hermine is abandoning her adorable gaysha for her super cute gaysha in a dark sky cake. And Laura's just like, oh, wait, I don I can't even remember what this pineapple supposed to look like I mean what's a pineapple supposed to look like a pineapple. I don't even know anymore. I Know you've got her struggling to make a damn pineapple and then they start judging with Peter who's like Oh, right just wait you while I get fireworks to go off on top of shuttlecock It's the most amazing creature. I always it's Explaining look Shuttlecock is flying around the room He's so into it and he's like so happy with himself

He's like well, I think I've captured a certain dizzyness in his eyes look that's what his name is Dizzy Cuz he's dizzy all the time. He's a stupid little shuttlecock. They got dizzy. I want silly silly silly shock He's dizzy cuz he got a wee bump on his head and pause like we bump great And I'm pretty it's like it's funny because it's cute and slightly mad Just like you while we're talking to that invisible person who wants to kill you It's my brother It is my brother and I shall perfect the gluten-free shuttlecock before I return home. Well, well, Peter, congratulations. You seem all sweet and innocent, but now you can say you made me eat cock on this show.

Who's like that, it's a bit chewy, needs more punch. And not for me, for me it's just not the right taste and Peter's like Thank you It's it's not the right taste and also I hate the entire concept of it You're stupid and you should be ashamed of it a shuttlecock for crying out loud It's a great British bake off not like the way wide world of spolt you really get out of my face No poor Peter went from like the happiest person in the world so just like sobbing in the corner He's gonna go to sleep tonight and have like nightmares of

dizzy the shuttle coxing. You fell to me. Now you fell two of us. So Dave, Dave's cake, his match at a cake. It's a cute little doggy cake. And I was like, well, the creases are let down. Much like your jeans, though, I said it, you just got burned. Mm.

The last day, it looks like terrified. He's like, oh, oh, oh, oh. And Prue surprised the rosewater and matcha. Oh, I said the rosewater and matcha was marked earlier, but it was Dave, that's why I said the hum doll. Either way. Still reserved the right for calling it the hum doll. Cheapy-y-y-y-y-y-y-y. It still works. It turns out well. The point is it turns out well.

Yeah, decent. I love them paws like decent job. So then Lottie is into the Japanese woods, into the Japanese woods. Mushroom thing. It's a cake with a sponge, a sponge with a cake. It's a toe. It's a toe stool. sponge with a cake, it's a toe to toe to all the others, and wobbly, it's a little top heavy, it's a little sweet, it's a little bit slow, it's like, argony! And jimin prus like, it jiggles, because it jiggles, because it's, we get it, we get it, it's alright, prus Jesus! Well, I thought they had to be more, but that's stunning.

That's stunning. It's really good. It's amazing. I mean, last time I had a sponge like that, do you know where I was? If you want to take a guess where I was, what I had a sponge like that? Mexico! No, try again. It was sometimes very special and very relevant to the challenge.

I was in. I bought it. Alright, Dave, you get a second guess. Go ahead. Mexico. God damn it, it was Japan. I was actually. I called it. All right Dave, you get a second guess. Go ahead. Mexico. God damn it, it was Japan. I was actually in Japan. All right.

That's right everyone. Everyone just like, sit there, let's soak in for a moment that I've actually been to Japan. Yeah, just think about that. Mm-hmm. Great. I feel like I should get a stamp on my passport every time I take a bite of one of these things.

Sometimes when I listen to that song I'm telling Japanese I say I've already been to Japan news. So then there means strawberry cherry blossom cake and it is very pretty. I think the cake is really really very, it is my cute at all, you know, it's like a dark piece of art. Yeah I'm pretty like well this is charming but it ain't cute. And Paul's like well it's of art. Yeah, I'm pretty like, well this is charming, but it ain't cute. And pause like, well it's quite menacing, you know. The tree is sort of stumpy. Oh, that's what I always say about you, Paul.

A little box, man. Fondont thick but a green thick shame. Not enough country that I was just in-ness. Hmm. So then mark with the sea, Hamish the dog. Fantastic trouble, eating dogs delicious. And I was like, well, you can see the character. So let's have a look inside. And Mark now looks like he's about to cry.

And he's like, um, um, Tahini. Hmm, she's like, this is a surprise. I like it. I like it. Tahini and roasted soybean. You spoil us so much. And then we go on to Laura with her pineapple, which looks really cute because it's an upside down pineapple-esque thing. And pause. Well that's very cute for a stupid looking pineapple. That's not quite right. Which could look more like a pineapple instead of a marshmallow on top of a green thing. But, you know, you can only do so much, especially if you haven't been to Japan, like I have.

Luzaa! So then Mark with the K avocado babies. And Paul's like, well, I mean, they're a bit cute. I guess a bit scruffy. Oh, it's witty and charming, but guess what? You also asked to taste good. Have I said that yet today? Have I said that? It has to taste good too. So it's a very tight sponge, very dry. The avocado oil hasn't kept it smooth, you know? And Mark said, well try the cake at the bottom. I think it'll be a little better in the bottom. I think it'll be better. He's like, no, actually, it's probably worse. It's cruel to say it's inevitable, but it's getting that way. I sure wouldn't send this to someone

in Japan. And Prud just takes a little baby and eats the head off. She's like, the baby is delicious, but it's less than 1% of the whole lot. So less than 1% that's the same percentage of people in this town who've been to Japan. And Mark's like, oh, he's the word inedible. That's not good is it? No, no. At which point I was like, I think, I think, yeah, I think the tribute to Mark is a tribute to his departure. So now we're going to deliberations and Matt, Matt's like, I think the tribute to Mark is a tribute to his departure. So, now we're going to deliberations and Matt's like, this is the first week I've been in the tent in every single showstopper, was a wow and progoes to look at. But it has to taste good too.

So Mark with a C in Dave are in line for Star Baker. And Paul says a lot regarding a lot is he's like, he's like, I've never in the Leven series tasted a sponge like that. I'm really glad I didn't give her a handshake because that was one of the most remarkable cakes of all time. No handshake though. No handshake. But Mark with a K and I was like, yes, and Laura, she was in trouble.

Cry cry. Why in trouble cry cry why why cry cry I said you know it would make you feel better Never eat anything works for me. Yeah, I like to prove talking about Mark's cake. She goes well I thought the idea was quirky and funny and very kawaii but the cake was awful So who's in the bottom now? It's Mark with the K Laura and Hermine. Yeah, it's also Paul's 100th episode. Well, you must have wonderful legs having to get up and down that box for a hundred episodes. By this time you've got a ass like a basketball for good reason good for you Next week star baker challenge will be making a cake that looks like pause ass It must be firm round and incomparable. I like to open this bottle of bubbly for Paul

Or as we like to call him the man who never misses a leg day So we now it's time to go back to the tent and it's time to announce who the star baker is. And no surprise here. Of course, it's Lottie because she blew Paul's mind with her amazing, what was it called? Cotton Jigglypuff. Whatever. It's the Japanese woods.

No, but the sponge was like a con-jiggly sponge puff. It's like a cherry blossom cotton candy sponge bloody, bluely, bluely, blue. I don't know if I forgot. Jiggly, the word jiggly was no. No, why are jiggles? Yes, for you.

So leaving us is someone who always has a smile, someone who I've bonded with, someone who likes sitting at a very tiny desk when he's at home and letting giant dogs drag him around box. The big leaving us is Mark El. Oh poor guy. Any cries? She's like, well, when you know you know don't you? Happy tears I made it. I made it to week six. Maze and puncher friends push me to make what I would never back before I couldn't I couldn't have asked for anything more except for perhaps a dog that's a little bit more controlled Brilliant from start to finish brilliant and proves like It doesn't matter how talented you are. One bad cake and you're out. Ha ha ha.

Yeah, and she's like, poor Mark. That disaster of a showstopper, true disaster that should haunt him for decades to come. I actually thought Laura would be going home today and gosh, I wanted to send her home with a stupid pizza oven. But she really did a wonderful showstopper. So let's just dwell on Mark. The failure that is Mark. What a terrible terrible mistake he made

Mark did you practice? I've been to Japan And that brings us to the end of the great British biking show next week, we don't know what next week is going to be. So I guess that's going to be a big surprise for the intent. Well, I guess we're going to find out. Yeah. Thank you all for listening. We are back tomorrow with some real housewives of Orange County.

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