Watch What Crappens - GBBS: Uncage My Tart

Episode Date: October 28, 2020

Great British Baking Show brings us baking week and cages some tarts before crumbling one of our favorites. This week's bonus focuses on HBO's The Vow. Find it at https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens**We designed lots of new face masks for Bravo lovers available at crappensmerch.com A portion of sales go to MedShare!Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cupi from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, I've been so happy, Well, hello, and welcome to Watch What Corrupt and the podcast for all that crap we just love to talk about on Yelpass!

It's me, Ronnie, and that's been over there. Hi, Ben. Hey, Ronnie. Hi. Everybody, we have a big announcement. Well, I'm a sex shoes. But also, we're doing a live show. It's our first live show in quite a while, and we're doing it a little bit differently

this time. We are using live show software which is super fancy. We're going to be doing it on a website called On Location so you can find it at on location live. On location live. And we'll have links up on our website that you can find to buy tickets. You have links up. Yeah. There are already links up so you can go buy your tickets and all that good stuff. And and that's gonna be on November 12th It's gonna be 9 p.m. Eastern time and 6 p.m. Pacific time and Kiswet we're gonna recap the very first episode ever a real housewives of Salt Lake City

Yeah, this is really exciting for us. This is like a like like We've been this is like our, our, like, it's funny because the very first show that we had to cancel for the pandemic was our Salt Lake City show. It was like a week away. And then everyone was like, Tom Hanks, Tom Hanks, that's COVID. And then the world shut down. So it's funny that our first, like, big, proper virtual live show is covering the real house I have Salt Lake City. So it's going to be really cool and you don't have to be a Patreon member to participate in the show. You just can get your ticket and then you can just like sit

down in front of your computer and watch, but you can also chat with other audience members. You can chat with us. And if you are a crap and it's on demand, crap and it's on demand Patreon supporter, you get $5 off. Just go to patreon.com and slash watch will crap and the details will be there for how to do that. But yeah, we're super excited to do this. I'm like really, I'm I'm I'm excited first of all just for Salt Lake City for real house of Salt Lake City and I'm also excited to be able to do it in this format. So it's gonna be awesome. Yeah, so go get your

tickets. As usual, we're doing a couple videos a week on crap and it's on demand as well on Patreon. Bonus episodes are over there. And I think that's it for announcements, right, Ben? Yeah, yeah. You know what? I've got one more announcement. It's past three week.

It's past three week. Otherwise known as every day at my house. I was proud of myself because I did not order Cresson's after watching this episode which is normally my style like if I see something if I hear pizza I order pizza If I see a croissant I will order a croissant luckily there were no croissants on today's show which I couldn't believe Yeah, I didn't order a croissant only because I had already ordered a croissant earlier in the day. And that is not a joke. I already had my croissant to the day. So I just, you know, I played it cool. Well, Laura would explain hashtag exciting because Laura loves saying hashtag in this episode.

Okay. That's my big note for Laura this episode. Everything she's like, hashtag pastry mate. All right. Hashtag pastry. It's what I've made. Hashtag. Hashtag pizza oven mate hashtag. Yeah. She's really into hashtag this week. I think she saw it on a pillow somewhere and wherever they're staying. And she's just obsessed with it. So hello, guess what? It's pastry week. You excited, Noel? And he's like, a drug one of those that Yeah, and then it's then he's about to eat the pastry and there's a voice that's like, No, don't teach me. And it's wacky. Yeah. One noise, don't eat me. So Noel is in a red flower shirt today. Just have to, I just have to point it out.

Every time I see one of his crazy shirts, so I can remind myself what to buy next time I'm shopping for my middle age retirement. He's like a one man Pinterest for you. He is. Yeah. And Matt, I don't remember what Matt was wearing. I actually did not write it down. I was like, you know what? I think I'm going to let Ronnie handle this one this week.

Whatever the, you know, whatever the English version of Costco is. You know, he's just like a plaid shirt from the discount store kind of a guy. I think it's called Basil Co over there. Is it? Basil? No, I just made that up. I just took a, I took a very British name and just sat in Co to it. Basil Co. The Bakus faced the perils of pastry week, taking on the most intricate challenges of a cent, making architecture edible, but the wrong kind of flaky can see the best of plans

come crashing down. Oh, I get that. That's like a play on words there. Do you want to come slaky? Do you want to come slaky? Yeah, I didn't know that the first time, but when you said it, I realized. Suddenly I see. Yeah, so we open up and no one is more excited about Page 3 week than Linda.

Oh! It's Page 3 week! This is the week I was waiting to get to make Page 3. Our Smolms can make Page 3. And her mean is also very excited. So I was just like, I'm looking forward to pastry week. You know, bread week, I said, wasn't my week. And cake week wasn't my week.

And just any other week of the week of the year, it's just not my week, but pastry week. This is my week. This is my week. Now, someone told us online that you pronounce Hermine Hermine, which I appreciate that. Appreciate the note, but they call her her mean.

So yeah, they call her mean. Yeah. So I mean, I just don't know, but in case there's a controversy, hmm, there's a weird controversy. A thoroughly plot controversy. And Peter is like, well, I can't believe it's halfway. It's halfway really crept up on us. I mean, bizarre that we're already getting this far.

So bizarre. I mean, who would have thought I've already made it through four weeks of my brother berating me every single night in the tent? And Mark tells us, no one wants to soak it bottom. And Laura's like, well, they want more refinement for me. So I want to show them that I can do hashtag at the gate mate, all right?

So this week, you know what I've decided to do? I've decided to cart out my pizza up and I'm'm cook everything in there, and then put it on a doily. That's refinement, hash check refinement. So for the signature challenge, Paul and Peru would like you to make the Cornish dish, the pasties. Yes, eight identical pasties with any filling and a decorative finish. And no says that if he made pasties, there'd be the shape of Paul Hollywood's powerful buttocks. Yeah, he's very into some harassment of Paul

this week, which I love. It's just one long stream of sexual harassment of Paul. What's I'm into? He pulls it off. Yeah, so Prue starts, well, first of all, we first of all have Old Mark, Mark with a C, who is, I guess he's from Cornwall. So he's like, well, why did they have to say it's a Cornish national dish just to give me more pressure? Oh, goodness, goodness, I've got that tasty pressure,

pressure. And Priya is kind of smarty. She's like, most of our challenges are pure baking challenges, but this is cooking too. Well, cooking, disgusting monsters. You don't fucking monsters. Probably use onions. Trash. Trash. Paul said, well, you don't want it to be too dry. Outside has to be thin butter and crispy,

but inside you get a filling. I'm like, yeah, that's usually where Phil pastries work, Paul. And Peru is like very much about crimping. She's like, it doesn't have to be a corner's pasty shape. It can be any shape you like, but we want crimping. We want lots and lots of crimping. I must see crimping.

I'm obsessed with crimping. Just please make it crumping. Just please. I'd love to see Peru crumping her. She comes in just like a clown just crumping. I want the best pasties I've ever had with crimping. All right, you two calm down over there. Why does proof things that she's going to get the best pasties she's ever had right now? Well, where did she get that notion? I don't know. Do you remember the head cake challenge? Come on now, prove real real backer expectations. Remember the brownies? Remember the brownies?

Never forget the brownies. So the judges go to Laura first. Hello, Laura, I'm making a mess again. I see so much for refinement. It's like, geez, have you put sleeping beauty down yet? What the hell, man? He's like the evil queen of the forest. I wish he was a queen. I? He's like the evil queen of the forest. I wish he was a queen. I really don't like that he's a straight guy. It feels unfair. Yeah, I agree.

It seems like he should be like a leather daddy. Yeah, like a really judgey leather daddy, where you're like, okay, he's mean to me, but I've also seen him sit on the traffic cone. So I can be forgetful. Yeah, exactly. That's exactly right. So Laura making a mess I have a pizza oven mate so she's gonna make a cheese and onion traditional pasty and all is like well Paul just said to me not 30 seconds ago that he likes a cheese and onion pasty and he hates pizza ovens and women named Laura so good luck.

Thanks mate, hashtag thanks mate. Laughty is making a rough puff and so our peer to a Linda as well. They are really reimagining the traditional pasty. I'm like, ooo, they really live on the edge with their rough puff pasty. I love a rough puff. So then we go to Linda. Chuck your metacy streaks and butter in your post. Yeah. It's like Linda you're you're just me wearing dirt in your what's going on?

Linda's just rubbing better all over her face. I could crazy lady. Linda do you realize that you've incorporated rubber bands into your dough? I really? I wasn't aware. Linda, do you realize that you've incorporated rubber bands into your dough? Oh really? I wasn't aware. Oh, you know what? Some moms were always resourceful. Mark, Mark and Dave are making a sturdy short crust,

but her mind's creating a pastry all her own. And she's like, it's the best of both worlds. Not quite a crisp, not quite a short, it's the best in both worlds. Yeah, it's like Hannah Montana. Right? It's the Hannah Montana of Pump pastry. So she's doing something with preserved lemons, raisins, lamb, chickpea, chickpea,

tahini, it looks delicious. Yeah, she's doing a Moroccan style. And she's like sounds delicious, long as the pastry doesn't fall to mate. I'm in your head now. You just got prude. You just been prude. The prude. So Mark. Prude. So then young Mark, with a K, is he's doing like an alugobi with basically cauliflower up in your Indian style. And prugos up to him and is like, last week's star bake, how do you feel today? Like a failure because that's what you'll be.

You just got prune. He's like, well, nerves, nerves, I've still got nerves today. And she's like, that's the thing. Stop Aka means mapping. Like geez, were you making out with Paul before this? He's running off on you. I know. She was just like savage day.

What do you have to prove yourself every single time? Can't spell proof without proof. You just got proved. So now it's time to work on fillings and Linda's like oh that's gorgeous! That's absolutely gorgeous Linda you're smelling your shoe yes I like that it sounds quite bit and Ladi's like I'm making a turd in the whole pasty, turd in the whole less because it's not gonna be a whole. Wah! She's so angry at her own work.

But it's gonna be a mashed potato, fennel gravy and sausage, and brew is still on her, she's on a rorge, like, oh, rotty! I'm not totally convinced by this. Of course I'm talking about your makeup, it's awful. Also, this could be a really stodgy paste yet. Can't have a stodgy paste yet or a lotty. I have hope if not faith.

It's like, wow, wait a minute, poor sitcom while you're at it. So like, well, I'm gonna take that with me home probably because she hates it, hate for all women. I like also the proof goes, a lotty you are always original, which is the British way of saying you're a freak of nature, get out of my tent. Yeah, so noles like halfway through and Matt, you know, basically everyone's rush.

I had to rush right down every single little thing they said, but Matt's like, where does the time go? Where does all the time go? And noles like into a small bum bag, Paul Hollywood wears, that's what time goes, kids. Time after time. So Peter is making fish pasties and in a very British, like this is, I love how British this show is.

He's like, well, I'm gonna be making pasties in the shape of a haddock. I'm gonna make many, many hadocks and they're going to all be filled with haddock. They're getting hadocks shaped pasties in the shape of haddock filled with haddock. Yeah. And rice filled with rice and haddock. And Nore was like, well, do you think, do you, do you ever think slightly of going to the finals? And he's like, well, I don't want to be murdered at night, but my creepy brother, so hopefully finals will make it Hopefully I'll make it to finals, my brother is too

Reformed. You just see like a shadow behind him. Don't fuck up the heart, ex too big. My brother says I can have extra vanilla bars tonight if I don't fuck up the cat. Oh, did I say fuck? So no girls to check on Linda and she's like oh they're gonna be in the shape of a Samo sir we've been going we've been to go in a few times I've have walks in walks in walks how you should walk quite away in the morning just to get these Samo's isn't gonna go in me are you saying these lovely walking shoes that I got in India they're in the shape of macros and I just walk and walk and walk and walk And then one day I realized they actually weren't just two macros just rotting on my feet.

Oh, it was a lovely time. So she's doing spicy Indian pasties with chicken, coriander, and potato. And she's like, I'm going to attempt to put a combo symbol on there, come on! Yeah, by the way, I like that she's like, I'm making my pasties in the shape of some of this. You're just making you're making some osu

Well, so is that the only difference then in a pasty and a samosa because to be known, I'm like the pastries different a little different. I mean probably a lot. I mean, I don't know what the pastries in a samosa Don't mind me, but I'm just saying like because in America a pasty is something you put on your nipple So you can show your boobs, but then you don't get in trouble with the law That's that's a samosa also you can put a samosa on your nipples That's true. Well, I mean in my house I have you know the Madonna's cone bra was inspired by two samosas that she once strapped on her boobs I like this make it my make it my statement

Yes, make it my statement. So Dave is taking inspiration from his travels, and this week he hates Mexico, don't know what Mexico has done to him, but Mexico is now out in Dave's world. Yeah, Dave is like, yes, I'm making a pasty that's been inspired by Asia Mexico called Thailand. It's Thai based chicken with sweet chili dipping sauce and taco seasoning. Because I love Mexico, I can't not mess up. This is inspired from enchiladas I had in Thailand. They're like, no Dave, did you mean Mexico?

They're not at all tamale guacamole and chili con queso pasties. Dave, that's Mexico. Poor for the whole Necesito aqua pasties, all right. That's Mexico, Dave. In Thailand, they have the most remarkable thing. They take avocados and they mash them up with some onions and some garlic and you eat them with these special little Thai chips called tortillas. Like Dave, you're talking about Mexico again.

Can't wait to serve you my jumping bean pasties, like Dave. Okay, so now they're doing rolling out, rolling out, making little shapes to make them fancy. 45 minutes left and the bakers must be careful to manage every second. The more time spent building the pasties, the less time they'll have in the oven. So enjoy having a little bit less time in the oven, bad pasty. So, so Mark, uh, old Mark is making cornish fish pasties, uh, with mung fish, some fire and a sparracus. And Paul is like, so Mark, you're from Cornwall, so no pressure or anything, but how many pleats are you doing? Huh?

And Mark's like, I don't know as many as I can. Well, there's a set number. There's a set Cornwall number. The laws of Cornwall say that there's a set number pleats. Are you going to do it? I'm not going to tell you. I'm not going to tell you. Yeah.

I mean, wow, they've really got it down over there. A certain number of little crimps that you have to put in there. Yeah, like who is in charge of that in Cornwall? Like who is in the official office of Cornwall pasties? You know, it's like the Earl of Cornwall or some shit that they have. Like he's probably got his own goddamn castle that's been passed down from century to century because he numbered pleats on a fucking pasty. It's probably jewels from the ideas of London. She's like, well, one of my honors is that

being marriage, the oral sandwich, I also am in charge of the official record of how many crimps go into a Cornish pasty. So, it's a lot of pressure. Uh, so it's up to the baker on how many crimps and Linda's like no mine some emcee star low crimps for me if you got a problem with it talk to going crimp it easy so I'm like, why are you not doing crimps you're supposed to have crimps Laura I'm Linda come on Linda come on Linda I'm no tell sir because she's doing a butter wash on her and no tell sir I like to imagine when Paul has a bath

that's in butter, that's how he gets that nice bronze look. I feel like Paul likes to imagine that too to be honest. Yeah, and he does have like a rotisserie chicken tan, you know. So Ladi is like, well I know this is supposed to be nice and neat, but Vikings are messy bastards and if they don't like it, produce head'll be on a steak warning future judges not to fuck with my eyeliner. Got it? Always original that Latte, always original. So her, yeah, Latte's are all melting and Peter's adding nice little scales to his fish. The other thing is that Linda said that she was going to be sure her whole plan was to do a Yinen Yang on her pasties.

And she had to use even C in the drawing, this whole like, this whole like ornate thing and everything. And then she just cut to her and she's just like throwing the Nigelis seeds all over them. Like no, definitely no karma signed this time around. Yeah, and they tell her that they look like some Moses instead of pasties,

but to me they look like Sfika, which is a Greek lebonyese, you know Arabic thing basically. Yeah, but you know old delicious. You can put bread on anything like I discovered Recently just eating toast. I think because I've been watching so many British shows because I watch this one and I watched line of duty Which is like a British cop show and I'm like toast. You know what sounds good suddenly toast British cop show. And I'm like toast. You know what sounds good suddenly toast. I'm not really a toast eater, but lately I've been like toast and making a little tea. I mean, you guys are gonna wrap off on me. I know I've actually been making toast as well. It's weird because I've been I've been buying loaves of bread and like fancy bread. And then I just like toast it and dip it in olive oil or put it on like delicious. It's like one of the simplest meals ever

And I just freaking love it. So thank you. Thank you for fathers. Thank you. So Lottie. Oh, no, I'm still on Lottie. So Linda. Yeah, Linda's just like starts dropping seeds everywhere Which if you if you've ever had ants in your house is a terrifying look for something to eat Mm-hmm. Yeah, and then we go to hers are still raw little and Mark, everyone's freaking out because they're trying to get their quick times right. Basically. Yeah. And I just like, well, I've got them at 250. It's like a pizza oven in there.

And Linda just gets a boner. Laura Laura. Don't you dare. Don't you dare talk about the pizza oven. Is someone doing some pizza oven fanfic over there, mate? I'm hashtag aroused, all right? I knew a pizza oven. I worked with a pizza oven. And you, ma'am, oh no, pizza oven.

So lotty's are just leaking. And they don't, I don't see any cramps. They just look like balls of dough. They look delicious. They look like, I just want to stuff about five of them in my face, but I don't see any crimping, which I know will be an issue. And then they cut the Dave and he goes, this is a toy sweet chili dipping sauce. Make sure to up Dave.

Okay, congratulations. You made a condom in it. All right. I don't want to hear it. You abandoned Mexico. Yeah, after what you did in Mexico today, I was if they haven't been. Now, Dave, who's waiting for tacos now, Dave? So then Linda's, Linda's are like, she's like a full on disaster. And she has now cranked up her, she's cranked up her oven.

And so there's like, it's like five, four, three, and she opens up her oven. It's just like smoke coming out. It's like the most linda thing you would expect. You know, just a big smokey oven. Oh, for Linda. And then Lottie starts putting her little toadless, whole list toadless things into little toads that her cousin made, which is like so cute. And also charming and theory. It looked like she was putting them on like piles of dung. I looked like it was like a big pile of shit and she was putting pasties on them.

I know, she had to use them cause her cousin made them. I felt for her. I felt for her at that moment. And Mark with the seas like rustic is good, right? That's what we always say. Good old colony. So now it's time for judging and Mark old Mark is up first,

Mark with the sea and he and of course is like, no, Mark, you do have to wait for corn while on you. So no pressure whatsoever. How many please? How many please? Cornish fish pasties, polls like you're lacking on pleats. How many pleats were I supposed to do? About 21. So you're about seven short. You failure to cornwall.

He's like, and as I usually say to prove at the end of a night, bone dry, and you have cream as well, more cream, chew dry, dry, dry, dry, dry chew dry, dry dry dry dry dry dry. Dry rives with dialen per miss. This should die. It's too dry. And now Peter's, um, which look very good. And they're like, oh, it looks like a real fish.

Did you hear that brother? They said it looks like a real fish. Do I get micro nulla? But yet to more challenges, Peter, to more to a granola time. I'm proves like I was worried. It would be, Peter. Two more to a granola time. And proves like I was worried it would be starchy, but it is a bit dry. I'm also like, well, you've got rice on pastry.

Dry, dry. And then it's Lottie's turn and they're all messy, but Paul likes the color. And proves like, well, I think it's very witchy. It's a very witchy thing. You said, make a pastry in you made some sort of round dough ball and stuck it on a piece of clay that looks like a turd I'm very witchy. So she does a click click noise. Quick click. Nice. I don't know you I wrote quick quick nice, nice from Peru and Paul's like, well, the mashed potato works.

Can you believe it? And Peru's like, well, I said it wouldn't work. I was wrong. I would like an ounce to you. And Mark, I would like you to announce this to Cornwall as well. I was wrong. Mark, as a ambassador to Cornwall, I just want to say this was not stagy at all. Not stagy, my fears are staginess. So we get to Dave and Dave's like, well, I've made Thai basil chicken enchiladas. Like, no, poor. No.

Oh, I really like that you put chilies on top and you're on top of your paces. It's very, very obvious, a very obvious classic Dave thing. There's chilies and sides. We put a chili on the outside. Where'd he go Dave? Flavours okay. Dry, they're dry. Rye strides things out.

You've lost a flavor of the chicken. I mean, it's all right. It just doesn't wow me. Have I said dry yet? Hold on. I've got something in my- Huh? Dry!

It was dry. No, I'd like to try it with that sauce now what do you call that sauce salsa I think it's a totally sauce man it's not even food, Dave, come on, Dave. Haha. Oh. It's time for commercial. It's time for a- Celebrity beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife. And I'm Sydney Battle.

And we're the host of Wonder Woman's new podcast, Disantel. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity view. from the build-up, why it happened, and the repercussions. What deserve session with these feuds say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber. A seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows, it snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud.

But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wonder Yeah. Crapins commercial. So Mark with the K has his Indian peneer.

So Prius like, do you know that that's what a pasty should look like? Big, soft, tender, to get a room, Prujee. I know. Oh, it's firm enough, but if not to hurl over a hedge to hold into your hand, I can print. Pru, why are you throwing your pasties over the hedge? What do you have against Wilson? Taste beautiful, nice kick of heat, texture spot on, gorgeous, can't even say dry, which sort of pisses me off, hate you, love your food. It's heaven, it's absolute heaven, but we shall not be shaking your hand because you're a very small person who sits at a large desk. Oh no, the other way around, large person, small desk, disgusting.

And Matt shakes his hand. He's like, well done. You realize that this is a completely valueless handshake, don't you? So then her mean, her mean, she just needed a few more minutes with her pastry just to get the color that they wanted, but the filling is their nice fat pasties. And Paul is like, fillings beautiful, beautiful. That's lovely pasties. That's a lovely pasties. I'm going to stare at you and not shake your hand. Ha, you got pulled. It got you. And so they, they, it got over it. And then Linda spicy Indian pasties.

You did read the stuff about crimping didn't you, Linda dear? Why do you have lipstick all over your face? Oh yeah, I crimped something. I took a fork and I found a Mac world. It was a live Mac when I just mashed it with a fork until it was all crimped something I took a fork and I found a macros a live macron I just mashed it with a fork when she was all crimped up. It's like no the pastry not the macro Linda Why with the macros Linda why do you have a fork sticking out of your temple darling?

Oh, I was crimping myself crimping the service for to do No crimped the pastry. Oh, I did crimp the pastry. Oh, no, I just really asked, I crimped my cheekbone. Hmm, so perhaps like so basically a samosa you made. A bit broken up, perhaps longer in the oven, perhaps more well thought out, perhaps read the instructions, perhaps crimped. Maybe! And it's like stenciling didn't work but the flavor is delicious poor Paul Linda Linda stop trying to bite off your own pinky darling come on Linda come back Linda come back okay Linda stop chasing that duck around come back onto the tent so then Laura but Paul does say well done he'll like the taste of it. Yeah

Then Laura proper tasty pasties is what she's made mate and he's like nice color beautiful glow little crimping Yeah, I like the fact that they're nice and fat. I like that quite a bit. Mmm Heaven flaky pastry holding together. I could gobble it all up But I was in the middle but not wet. Tastes like 40 to me, darling. Very well done. So Paul's like spot on and you know, well done Laura. And she's like, to impress Paul with pastry and proof with filling. Double whammy there. Hitch-tag, double whammy, all right? Yeah. So and Hermine is happy Atlenders like well, I knew the flavors were gonna be good. I knew that I could smell them So you know I could smell those flavors. Oh wait, I wasn't smelling those flavors at all

I'm gonna have a stack some macrillum minonstrels Okay, now they could practice that one, right? But now is the technical challenge, and it's not practiced. And Pru has set up this challenge, and she just tells them, it's all about refinement. The inside must be as perfect as the outside, unlike Paul, who's sad and dead on the in, but gorgeously dender on the out. He's like an overcooked potato. So they have to make three raspberry and three

salted caramel a-clares. So they start getting down to business and we go over to Paul and Pru who are sitting at their little table and Paul's like, a-clares is a technical challenge. Personally, I think it's a good one. More. And Pru's like, well, most people think they Claire is very easy, but then again, these people couldn't make brownies. So I mean, this is not as well, bitch, figuring out called fusion for them. Yeah, I've actually made these.

I haven't made the long ones about what do you call them? And you just make the little dot, like the little circles, little balls. Oh, yeah. It's like the same circles, little balls. Yeah. It's like the same thing, but balls. It starts with the piece. It's shoe pastry and it's preferable. Yeah. So my God, I used to make those.

I had a preferable moment back in my baking year when I got a kitchen aid. God those things are good. And they're amazing to mess up because they take some practice, but God messing those things up You just get to sit there and eat your messed up ones You messed up for fitter roles Yeah So Basley Proost says like, well, they seem very easy But if you want really high-end and elegant special ones, go to a different show. Otherwise, we'll just watch this challenge

Yeah, so they get their janky instructions, you know, it's like, turn on oven. The end. Thank you for coming. I know. The first thing is that to make a shoe pastry. Now, you would think that they've all memorized how to make a shoe pastry because every year they have to make a shoe pastry for a pastry week. Like, it's just part of what they do.

And Linda sees the interactions and it goes, just make a shoe. I'm not talking about a walking shoe or shoe like the pastry. Yeah. Laura's got Laura's like got flip flops in the pot. She's just staring around. So, so Linda's like, well, it's been a long time since I've made shoe pastry. So I'm not entirely sure that I've done this correctly, but I'm trying to like Linda your bowl is upside down. You're not doing it correctly. So no goes to mark first work with the sea. And he's like, well,

look at that. A lot of writing those instructions. You know, she writes books. Can you tell? Yeah. And then they're all just like making those shoe pageries. And one thing that they're doing then they're all just like making those shoe pastries and one thing that they're doing is they're holding your spoon up and if the batter like starts to ooze off the spoon into a V-shape then they know that their shoe pastry is where it's supposed to be. Which was cool for me. I don't know why, I like the things.

I like what they get thrown into letters. I want to make these now because I just had that memory of making these and they were so good. I think I'm going to go to the grocery store the second this is done. Really? Yeah, I mean, that's not sound good. I mean, I used to love a Claire's when I was younger. Like, I love them so much.

I'm gonna make prefered roles. I'm not gonna make a Claire's. They're better as balls. I don't like the whole thing to have to try and figure out how to stuff. I like the little balls. Yeah, okay, I support that. I like the little balls. Yeah. Okay. I support that.

I support you making something. I think what you should do is you should make that the preferred a roll tower. I forget what it's called. But you know, it's a very fancy. Yeah. I said it was stolen later by the Macroll. The Macroll. Yeah.

Exactly. Okay. So let's see. Other time. So there's no instructions for the oven. Uh, so they're just kind of guessing it, basically. And now they have to make their custard to go on the inside as fitting. Yeah, and, uh, yeah, because they got them at, and they're just like stirring and Peter is like,

I'm stirring to make sure it's not lumpy. My brother hates lumpy crampat. He says, if I make a lumpy crampat, he's gonna beat me over the hand with a twig. Well, three hours straight straight I can't have that Well his abusive brother in our imagination really helps him because his of course look perfect And then Noel goes over to Dave and he's like Dave you left handed or right hand left handed You know a left handed person is never won this before right? Nor someone who's worn a yellow shirt like you are today so good luck, good luck Dave. Dave, I'm so glad we found some

personality for you. Left-handed. There you go. So, uh, Ladi is like, well I don't know what I'm supposed to be doing. Just finding new ways to make scrambled eggs, I suppose. And Linda's over there acting like me when I'm fully in the eating disorder mode. Just like, no, I don't want to eat all of these. I'll pull water on them so I don't have to eat them because she doesn't much. She had failures as her first go round. So she's just like putting water on them and I'm like, current me, present day me is like, no! You want that in the morning! It's so true. And then Mark, Mark with a C, old Mark, his, his, his shoe pastry was janky. But unlike Linda, he's just like, fuck it. I'm going with it because his a Claire is just like the fleet. And so they bit the, they look like clown shoes. And he's like, what have I'm going for it? I don't care. So he's just, okay, fine.

And Matt tells him, is it harder to cook on television? Would you want to go on other shows like naked attraction? I will go on to naked attraction because my body is my business. So Linda starting her shoe again and her mean, now they're making caramel because, you know, one has to be caramel, one has to be raspberry. And so a lot of them are working on their caramels, but Linda is still working on her second batch of a Clairs. And the second batch is also failing terribly.

Yeah. And she's, the show is way more abusive than they show because Linda has like a big wrist gash, did you notice it? Every week she has some sort of bandage on. I know, but this week looked like self-harm. I was like, guys, stop be nicer to Linda, okay? For Christ's sake. So her skill aren't working and Matt's like,

do you want me to go to the Supermarket and just buy some for you? And then Peter is all positive. He's like, Oh, I mean, my comfort save now. Oh, I love gluten. And then I've just passed this right by his face. I'm sorry. I'll never cook again. I'm sorry, brother. So yeah. So everyone's doing like they're making their feelings and stuff. Linda is still working, she's, now she's on batch number three of her shoe pastry, which is really not a good sign that you're on batch number three.

And everyone's working on their feelings and their toppings. I know, but it's also so sexy that somebody can just whip out three shoe pastries. She's in that amount of time. And then Dave is dead to me. You know, I know that you don't like Dave. I've really had no problem with Dave. He looks like he's trying so hard, but he's dead to me. You know, I know that you don't like Dave. I've really had no problem with Dave. He looks like he's trying so hard,

but he's dead to me now because they're making feelings and Dave's like, I've made the raspberry yogurt instead of raspberry. I've got what? Dead to me. Yeah. And he's so proud. He's like, I thought rather than doing cremptistory,

I'll do a raspberry yogurt to go inside. So here it goes. I'm like, wait a go Dave, you've revolutionized A Clare's that have been around for how many hundreds of years, and you're the one who figured out a new filling for it. No, it's not going to work Dave, don't do it, Raspberry. Yeah, do you think that? Yeah, no one thinks of a Clare as in things.

Oh, I hope my probiotics are in balance, so I can do great. Okay, it's a Clare Dave. It's literally pastry week. You should be making a Creme Pat. This is a technical challenge. Do what they tell you to do. Yeah. And, um, piping,

how they have to do piping. And Loddy's like, not my finest. And Linda's third time comes out of the oven and she's only got five minutes left. And then Mark. So Mark has his flat-aid clear. This is his clown shoes and he's trying to, he's trying to fill them, which is also very sad. And then for me, what was very gratifying was after Dave

thought he could game the system with his Raspberry yogurt, when he tries to then insert it into his, the yogurt just goes everywhere. I was like, huh, that's to get Dave for your Raspberry yogurt hack. Yeah, let's all bar fee. So poor Linda just has to, you know, just stuff stuff on top. I don't even think she tries fill it.

She basically makes sure it's more or less. Yeah, they look just as like batons, dolly batons and dipping sauces. Yeah. And second on what I've can and then look great. Portland, well, for Portland. She's really struggling. So now it's time for judging. And first up is Dave who has, you know, color, but hmm. Raspberry. This one's empty and that one's running completely liquid. I guess I was proof saying that but she's in person in Paul in my mind. Yeah, it's like no, I'll explain it though.

And then Lotties are neat and they're all the same size and they're set pretty well. And Paul's like split consistency wrong. It's like whoops. A set of OGs. So then Linda's turn and Paul's like, oh, it's a dip one. I mean, just throws it down. That's terrible. I know. It's just so. Was it dry? Was it stodgy? No, it was just terrible, all around, terrible. And then her mean is next and pretty like some because it's nice and fat. And I was like, well, the Claire's baked well. Well, for an ordinary person at least.

And then Laura is up. Laura, I don't know why I said it like I'm from Long Island. Laura is up next, okay? And hers are very skinny, but they look neat enough. You know, it looked like a pizza oven, I'm not trying to be fancy for once. Pulse, the textures are all wrong. And Mark C. Pru says his look like a caterpillar and a lot's wrong and the cream had scrambled. The pastry is underbaked.

But otherwise it's delicious. I feel like these people are being mean to my friends and by my friends I don't mean the contestants. I mean the carbs Like how could you talk to a carb like that even at its worst? It's still a sweet piece of bread with I agree Like come on I agree is finding your hearts So then they get to young mark and who's like, okay, I'm cheering up because these are more less. Okay This is look wonderful. I'm gonna what could go wrong. They're the perfect shape the perfect size. They don't look like they're soldier in the midget

Oh, that's a go to that damn tea. It's empty. It's empty. There's nothing in there Dreams are dead. Thank you, son. So worst of best Linda's last Then mark with the sea then Laura then Dave then Lottie then Mark then Heming, then Laura, then Dave, then Lottie, then Mark, then Hemine, and then Peter of course. Hmm, Peter, and then Prue goes, my only quarrel is that there was just a little bit of fat. My only quarrel, I was like, that's so British to say that. I know, she's like, let me read from Ronnie's yearbook right now to say, a little bit fat

but lovely. Well done. Ronny's yearbook right now to say a little bit fat but lovely well done And Peter's like that's the first time I've won the technical so take it off the bucket list Shut up Peter. I'll tell you when you go to take anything off the bucket list brother Not bucket list yet bitch How about you take this one off the bucket list being an annoying fart. So Linda's like, well, that's disgusting, but tomorrow is another

day. She's losing her mind at this point, by the way, she's just like a crazy old lady laughing at our jokes, talking like walking in circles on the sidewalk. Yeah. So then, oh, they have this like after show that people were telling us to watch and I didn't watch it, but I looked it up because people said there's an after show. So anyway, I looked it up and Linda so she just looks so pretty or hairs all done. She's got her makeup on. I'm just glad Linda wins everything just by staying hot. You go, girl. Stay hot, Linda. Stay hot like that oven that destroyed several batches of shoe pastry for you.

So the show's stopper challenge is a caged tart. It's like the one night, the one day I decided to protest. Caged tart. How dare they say that about you. So then, yeah, they have to make a sweet-tart contained within the latest pastry cage must be self-supporting and highly decorative. So this is kind of a random thing, right? Like I make a tarte, but then also put a cage on top of it.

Is that a thing that people do? I want to say that's ridiculous. And then then you know, someone's going to be like, well, actually, in the court of King Louis the 14th, it was a commonplace thing to put a chart in a cage and it was called a ball on a law. And if it weren't for that, an important piece of pastry history, then America, Roads Pierre would still be alive. So, so, uh,

Noelle is like, do you know who invented the cage? Todd was actually Nicholas Cage. And what does he say? I, I, I didn't commit it. Yeah, at some point he said, okay, so I looked it up online. This is from Reality Titbit, which is funny instead of Didbit. It's like Reality Titbit. So who did invent the cage chart? Was it actually Nicholas Cage? We've done some research to find out.

Did Nicholas Cage invent the cage chart? Nicholas is a 56 year old American actor and filmmaker. He starred in films blah, blah, blah. According to Nole, okay, guys, just tell me the answer. Do you make more money by making me read five paragraphs? Seriously. So according to JoePastry.com, Tarts in general come from the medieval pie making tradition and are in fact a kind of flat open face fight. New that.

Short Cress came in a common use about 200 years after prize in 1550, but the Caged Tart is just one section of the circle of Tarts. The name of the exact50, but the Caged Tart is just one section of the circle of tarts. The name of the exact person who invented the Caged Tarts is unknown. Well, thanks for wasting my whole fucking day really, tit-bits.

Oh, God. And then their next article is, does Matt Lucas have alopecia? Okay, you know what I did this to myself. You did it. Is he is Matt Lucas and Elbino. Okay, you know what I did this to myself. You did it. Is he is Matt Lucas and Albino? Is Albino okay to say, I never know these days,

I wanna make sure I'm being respectful. No, no, no. I'm just curious. I don't obviously there's no issue with it. My brain is curious about things. I have thought for every- Your brain is a cage tart. It's just a box of the cage tart.

It's a box of the cage tart. I'm a cage tart. I'm a cage tart. You know everything. I'm like a tart in the shape of a taco under the looves pyramid. I'm a Thai cage tart in Mexico, not to land. So, Matt's like must be self-supporting and highly decorative and tastes seper. And then Linda's like, the sun is shining and I'm smiling. I am at the moment until we're dishing it up, which I'll probably be suicidal.

But for now, I'm doing crazy. Nothing could go wrong. Nothing could go wrong whatsoever. I'm just gonna make a cage at a pastry. Pretty sure, but we should be Asian. I change my voice for her every single time. I just have like this, I have like this, like a collection of strange British voices that I just give to everyone. Like I really, there's no rhyme or reason that I need my voice for her every single time. I just have like this, I have like this like a collection of strange British voices that I just give to everyone. Like I really, there's no rhyme or reason that any of my British accents. Sometimes I just, it's sometimes someone speaks like this.

And sometimes, sometimes, sometimes, I'm just going to do what I'm going to come to my mind face. Okay. I just envision you reading Harry Potter to yourself years at a time. I thought I would be better at them after, so much love Island UK, but it turns out I'm not. Oh, so Paul's like, well, it can't be too solid. Gotta be structurally sound. Has to be lashy with very crispy bass. Lots of feeling beautiful top. Don't fuck off. Short walk to town and must be not too close to the road. So they're free to use whatever pastry they choose, but each dough has a different job to do. So let's see them get to work.

Peter's making a hazelnut pastry and Dave's like, I'm making a French Mexican sweet Thai pastry I can't pronounce. And then Pri was talking about the tart and she's saying, well it has to be absolutely lacious. The kind of tart you just want to eat a huge amount of, but you shouldn't because it's very rich, you don't want to be naughty, not at all. I'd have quite acquired with someone but too much tart. Not at all. I'd have quite a quarrel with someone. It's too much tart. So Ladi is using three kinds of pastry and she's gonna do like a pyramid apple tree tart and then Paul is like, well I question if it will be a tart without sides. I looked up the definition of tart. I looked up the definition of tart and it says it's a flat pastry pole stupid

Yeah I called a sideless tart there. How about that Paul? But she's not the only one in to try and goals these days Dave is making his cage inspired by the Yes, it's inspired by the Louvre But he's going back to his favorite thing, Mangle and Lime, because didn't you say that a few weeks ago? My favorite flavor, sort of my signature flavor, is Mangle and Lime. My invented Mangle and Lime. It's like, of course. They love Mangle on this show.

There must be Mangle and C. There's Mangle in every show so far. I have been thinking about Mangle because actually, all this talk about Thailand, you know, it was exactly a year ago that I went to Thailand. I topped on a plane and went to Thailand for that wedding. Remember when I went I can't believe it's already been a year since then and when I was in Thailand all I did was eat mango and sticky rice and that's really I woke up this morning saying I want mango and sticky rice. So basically David's triggered me and I'm angry. I'm in goal. So Linda is making her tart case and she's like just not trying just trying not to

stretch it. Then Mark is Mark with the case like all making it crispy bottom. I also by the way just want to go back to Dave one second because when Dave Dave is his plan for his cage to look like the Louvre, he's gonna like glue it together with Caramel and Bruce, he's gonna go, well, that's going to be very difficult. Well, good luck. Steve, good luck, idiot. And then Dave tells Laura, he's like, Laura, I just love it when you beat the butter.

Look, no, you don't. You look so annoyed. You know, he's like, oh, that's Laura beating the butter. Yeah, you don't. You look so annoyed. You know, he's like, oh, there's Laura beating the butter again. How am I supposed to concentrate on my Kessadilla? My Kessadilla cookie taco with her over there beating the butter like that. Did that counter's personality and me making that joke about butter? Did that? I'm left handed to and I like Mexico. So the judges go check with Laura and she's making key lime inspired by by botanical theme or making the Kent garden taught with Italian meringue and a dimmed lattice with pastry,

snails and hashtag butterflies. Mmm. I love Kilaan pie. It's probably one of my most favorite things Kilaan pie. It's just a great flavor. I just love Kilaan pie. I love it so much. Yeah, yeah, it's KeeLime.

It's like Paul subscribes to like KeeLime Playboy. Just like, yeah, make it KeeLime, yeah. Yeah, pornhead.com slash KeeLime. I'm a Limeer. That's for guys who are really into Limes. That's for guys who are really into lines. Oh. Um, so let's see, Peter, I certainly did not make a pastry cage but fool this challenge.

I've never heard of a pastry cage. What pastry cage? I've never practiced it in my life. That's because you belong in a metal cage. So get back in there, Peter, when you're done. So Ladi is doing something with chocolate with, well, I don't know what I wrote. I can't read this line, so Ben, it's up to you. I don't know what that line was either, but I can say that Hermine is making a lemon tart

and she's, I wrote down she's making a pastry cage. Well, of course, she's making a pastry cage because that's the challenge. I don't know why I felt like writing that. Hey, guys, Hermine's doing something different from everyone else. She's making a cage out of pastry. And she's also doing something for Paul because she's making a tangy lemon lime meringue. Hmm. And Prusa says, oh, her mean, you had such a great day yesterday. Can you do it again? No pressure, but I'm going to get into your head a little bit. Do you think you can get it? Do it again and not fail. You can't fail. Don't fail, I mean. Don't fail. You just got pruned. So I'm hoping I keep saying bread week isn't mine, biscuit week isn't mine, because what?

This is my week. Oh really, when I've brought over a fail panel, just in case things start getting a little wonky darling. And then we go over to Linda who is putting yellow and red strands of dough on a bowl. And it just already looks like a failure. It already looks like that dough is gonna break before anything has happened. I think it looks really pretty, but yeah, I was like, mmm, I need a plan for this.

Take a cut. Yeah, I'm like, this is not gonna work. And Lottie is cutting from stencils and Mark's making little circles. And Mark has a lattice color. And yeah, Linda is just like, I'm going to break some hair. If hair was still on a bone. I found some mud outside by the by the tent.

And I put it in here and I give it some food coloring. And then I stress the mud into straps. And I put the straps on the bowl. I think it's going to be delicious. And Peter's doing just kind of wavy lines all over a bowl as his mold, which is crazy. It's not structurally saved, but guess what? It's modern art. So, uh, Hermione is making hearts and David's making little rhomboy things. And that would take a moment. And Matt goes over to Lauren.

He's like, who would you put Nikkei if you could put anyone here Nikkei? And she's like, how many paid it would be cute, wouldn't it? I'm afraid you'd feed him. She probably has thought about that a lot actually. I just want to feed Peter cheese and a cage. Yeah.

So, um, Matt and all, it's halfway through. And they have pizza paddles and they're like bouncing an apple from paddle to paddle and then no breaks his paddle. So then Mark and Matt, Mark with the sea is talking to Matt and Matt's like, what has gone wrong so far? And he's like, well, I'm making a message in a bottle. So the cage is going to be a bottle. And then there's going to be pear and ginger cream.

And then there's going to be pear. And then under that, there will be pear with pear on it. My daughter Loughner, she's Mark with the K. He's like, it's going to be a bottle cage with lots of pear. He he he. Ha, do you know how many pairs you can fit under a tiny desk? I do.

And for you it's like, what is this? What's in that vicious business? So now they're working on flavors and Lottie's doing something with popcorn in her crumb pat and Linda's mixing together sugar and evaporated milk, which sounds I Like that sounds delicious. I can already imagine what that's going to be. She's making a gypsy top. It's coffee and brandy, sponge topped with rose water and flavoured pastry down and noles are excited because he used to have gypsy charts when he was a kid and he hasn't had one since. So big, big prospects for gypsy charts.

And now for Mark with the C. He's like, I'm also banking on favorite bank with my Blackberry Apple Pie. Yeah. My favorite porting in the whole wide world is Blackberry and Apple Pie. I was like, okay, Mark, settle down. Relax. So they're getting their cages out of the oven now

and they have to cool their cages. And now we get to see them try and take their cages off, I guess. And now they have to cook their tarts. Oh, so they're cooking their tarts while the cages are cooling and they're making tarts. And a lot of the tarts, Dave's honestly, as much as I hate on Dave, his tarts looked amazing. It was so beautiful.

And a lot of the tarts looked very, very pretty. Most of them did, not all of them. Yeah, I thought they looked really good too, but I was concentrating mostly on the cage. Yeah, because now is when they start taking the cages off. I really wanted to make sure to stop the podcast and let everyone know that charts were being baked. So half an hour left and Matt's over there putting Linda's crazy lattice strands on his head. It's like a circumstance. And everyone's getting those cages out. Never was stressing.

And first one, the break apart is Mark's bottle, Mark with the K's bottle. And he did that risky, he did a risky dough. Remember, he was, uh, constantly bit of a risk to rough puff for the cage, but I'm going to do it. But that cage wasn't going to work anyway because I was also a very solid design with only like little holes Cut out and they said that there shouldn't be a super solid design So he was he was doomed no matter what I hate to break it everyone. Yeah, I'm here for the truth You just got banned you just got banned. Yeah, and Linda's like, I'm not going to get this off of the bowl. And hers starts to break marks breaks. But Laura and Pete drum roll, they do theirs.

There's come out great. Amazing. Yeah. Laura's looked amazing. And actually, Lottie's I thought was really cool. Yeah. And her man, her mean is gluing together different squares together, like different rain rectangles together to be a square cage. And then Linda keeps putting hers back in the freezer, but not looking good because they've only got 15 minutes. Yeah. And young Mark, he has his broken cage. He just sort of like piles on top of his tart, but the thing is the way the cage looks

and the way it is sitting there on it, it kind of just made his entire thing look like a carcass. It just looked like flesh and bones. Like there should be some crows flying in and picking at it. Yeah, and then Linda's is just a mess. She's like, it's a shame, isn't it? Linda's, it's a shame, isn't it? Cage taught.

That's gonna be the name of her cookbook. It's a shame, isn't it? Here are 122 recipes that are specifically made for you to mess up. And then when you serve them, you say, it's a shame, isn't it? Let me go and say it and share a punt with your hubby. So, judging time, let's see here. Who do we start with? We start with Dave, chocolate mango and lime tart, gorgeous Dave. I like the look of the mango

Dave, not heavy-handed at all. Yes, your tart does look a little bit like an end-gettings baby picture, but for the most part, well done with Circle, Dave. Well done. Oh, the flavor's absolutely lovely. Now, what would you call this tart open taco open taco with mango on it? I don't think that's really appropriate, but okay. But I was like, all right, you've made quite an impact. Dave, like, well, someone came back and a good mood. Someone just pulled one off during break. Someone, I'm not going to call everyone try. Someone must have visited porn up.com slash Limes.

Kill him. Someone must have visited pornup.com slash lines. KILLIUM. So, Mark, old Mark is up next. Kate looks good. Todd looks good. Prew is. Well, it's a lovely and rich chocolate, but this base is way too big. Way too big. It's only about that base, that base, that base, but this is too much. Um, so Mark, highly, highly mediocre. This is about as mediocre as McIntrana. There I said it. I've said it. Um, and Mark looks like he's about to start sobbing. He looks

like scared. He's like, there's a monster in the house. It's like, hmm, um, and Paul's like, well, I would like to see the chocolate to the edge because this base looks awkward and you've got this big chocolate circle on top. I don't know what you're doing here, Mark, with the sea. Find a K mark. Find a K. I mean, would you believe it? He had chocolate that did not go all the way to the edge of his tart. I mean, this is just a travesty and everyone in Cornwall should be embarrassed to have you as a resident. So her mean is next with her lime confit lemon meringue. And Prugas, well I think it looks beautiful. I think it's really clever design. I think

you manage to get it to work and then Paul touches it and it all collapses and she goes until Paul Hollywood managed to wreck it. And she's even made some macaron that she's put on top, but she didn't really get extra credit for, but hello, Pete. Yeah, well, the base, they felt the base could have been thinner. And the crew was all of a sudden like, well, you don't know what it was, you know, it was a big, Paul Hollywood, big cage, big daddy cage that's almost as if this cage has just got off of a swing of some sort and inside is the most delicate tart. Overall, though, spot on. I had the perfect color on it and uh,

Poo loves the key lime flavor and pause like, well I love it. Get that feeling in the back of your cheeks and I'm not going to say which kind of cheeks I'm talking about. Hey, oh, hey, okay, lime. So then Linda's Gypsy Tart pause like,

what happened? Oh my god. And Linda's like like it's usually less what today stayed on the bow. I guess that's what I get for wearing the ball as a hat who has the day, don't I? But they love the flavor. And Paul's like, well, you know, it's a bit thick. It could have been thinner. Love the flavor. It's quite frustrating, quite frustrating. You know, the way it looks just isn't good, Linda. It just isn't good. Yeah. And so she takes it away. She looks like she's about to cry, which is sad because she's usually, and she's usually so happy and go lucky. And then Ladi comes up with her apple tree tart. And the cage is really cool. It's like,

it's really thin and delicate. And it's like a pyramid. It's like, it's really thin and delicate. And it's like a pyramid. It looks amazing. And Paul's like, well, I still question if it's a tart, if it doesn't have sides. It's like I was telling my, I just wrote an op-ed actually in the national times. And I said, can a tart really be a tart

if it doesn't have sides? And I don't think so. I took a stand. Well, you know, I have to say about this tart. It's much like Paul today after he heard the words key lime. It's very sploochy. But it tastes beautiful. It tastes beautiful. It does look like a right mess though. Yes. So then Peter prude likes the randomness, like the way the randomness of the swirls of the cage. And Peter, I don't know, did you notice Peter's face? He looked like he was about to faint. It was like, he knew he's like right before he walked up there, it's like he got a call from his

brother and saying, my gun is aimed at your face. If you get bad feedback. Yeah, he did. You look terrified. He's like looking for the exit signs on both sides of the tent. Like, oh my God, this is it. I'm going to die today. It's like he snuck a bomb into his tart or something. And he knows like everything has to go perfectly. And he has like five seconds to get out of there

before it explodes. Yeah. So, I was like, looks like it's made out of bread, which actually is a compliment Lovely are the tots delicious but to smile on your face partly because the back of your cheeks are going have I said that yet? Do you ever just have some lime and get a full blown erection anyone anyone? So then Mark's broken bottle Paul just looks at him like, I'm like, you just look at him like he's gonna devour him.

And he's like, so the cage didn't work, it's like not compared to what you achieved, not Mark. The pairs don't even look appetizing Mark with the K. Did we make a mistake calling you star, beggar Mark? It's not a good one. The pie-upings are regular. The poach-pairs don't look appetizing. It's stupid. It's just a stupid, stupid tart in a non-cage. So Linda's like, yeah, by three weeks, it was supposed to be my week. It's a shame really. Yeah, it's a shame really. So now they deliver it. And they're talking about how the cages were astonishing. The cages were astonishing.

Well, you know, aside from linders and Marx and then there was that other one that just was like a pile of crumbs. I mean, okay, it was mostly crappy, but it was better than Browne's. And Linda, Paul Linda, but I think in spite of her exploding cage, Hermione must be in line for Star Baker. It's like exploding, Paul's the one who crushed it. You've her alone. I think even though Paul, you just destroyed Hermione's beautiful cage with your indelicate

manhands, I think she has to be in line for Starbaker. Paul really likes Dave's cage and knows like, but what about sweet Peter? I mean, come on, guys, it's got to be at least up there. Yeah, but in the end though, then they all start, they'd start talking about the people on the bottom and saying, well, Linda has to be at the bottom and Linda and Mark are at the bottom. Was there another person at the bottom or just the two? I think it's just Linda and Mark C. Yeah. So now it's time to announce the results. So the star baker is Laura. Hashtag Laura mate. Hashtag pizza oven, hashtag live, hashtag blessed. Hashtag pizza blessed.

And the loser is Linda. No. I know. At the top of the episode, I did start to think like, wow, Linda, because last week Linda did pretty well. And so I thought, you know, maybe Linda is like coming alive. She's, she's, she's like, I think that like Linda's just hitting her stride, which of course, as soon as I thought that, I should have known I had cursed her. Oh, Linda, but she's a good

sport about it. And last, you know, laughs it off. She's like, I've been like a child at Disneyland. What about her likes of my life? And, uh, proves like, yeah, she's a good baker who had a terrible we just embarrassing awful Terrible you know the worst part was when the worst part was when she put those Mickey Mouse ears on her tart And we said no, you're not actually a Disneyland And Laura of course is so And it ends up going hashtag win in it. Yep. Laura.

So that was it. I guess next week they said it's Japanese week. So that will be interesting. I don't even know what that's going to be like, but it'll be very fascinating. And I feel like there will be some intriguing disasters. Yes, so we will see you next week. For Tick-A-Store, live show on November 12th,

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