Watch What Crappens - Married2Med: Sister Friend Retrial Retreat

Episode Date: October 15, 2019

This episode is available in video form on Patreon as part of Crappens On Demand Jackie planned a Sister Friend Revival Retreat, and no one retreated. Quad and Mariah got to yell a lot though! As far as we could tell, no one brought the coke. BOOOOOOO. For this week's upcoming premium bonus Airport Snaps, where we mock passers by at the Atlanta airport food court, become a member over at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. ***New Limited Edition Shirts! "Shannon Bowldor" merch available at crappensmerch.com! **Crappens Live is coming to Atlanta (early and late show), Chapel Hill, Richmond, Tampa, Ft Lauderdale, Indianapolis, Chicago (early and late show), NYC, St Louis, Philadelphia, Denver, Seattle, Los Angeles (The Crappies), Detroit, Columbus, Austin (late show added!) and Houston! Find ticket links at watchwhatcrappens.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watch What Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chas, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch what crap ends would like to think it's premium sponsors. The Bay Area Betches! Betches!

Making the Slayer Taylor! Aaron McNickalis! She don't miss no trickle-ists. Hot dang! It's Jessica Dang! Lisa Walland. Now that's what I call Wall Entertainment. Hava Niggila Weber!

Sarah Greenwood only uses her power for good. He makes us squee, it's Richie D. Jamie, she has no last name. Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney. You don't touch the Nicki Morgan letters. Sip some scotch with Jessica Trotch. Higher than Iris, it's Lauren Perez. Ain't no thing like Allison King.

Megan Berg, you can't have a burger without the bird. Just saying, okay. Christy Wauberty-Dowardy. Kelly Barlow, when she goes Barlow, we go high low. Hannah, God, I love that banana. Anderson, and our super premium Patreon subscribers. Mina Kuchikuchi. She ain't no shrinking violet kuchar. Let's get

Racy with Miss Stacy. Shannon out of a cannon Anthony. Incredible edible Matthew sisters. Give them hell Miss Noel. Kelly Stump. The Stump Master. Always ready for Nicole pass already. One day your Rachel's in. In the next day your out. No one can do it like Andrea do it. Yes, we can with how Lee Carolyn and Ann Nancy sees into Sisto We love you guys Happy is my best son, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my best son, happy is my best son, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy is my friend, happy Money carom and as usual here I am with the gorgeous and talented Mr. Ben Mantleker up the beach side bog the band to Blinta and guess what else the real housewives of kitchen aren't that whoo it's a cartoon about the housewives the housewives but they made out of the tentals can you believe that what you find that on YouTube hi band hi how's it going

good Monday morning I know I've got an Atlanta hangover. I like woke up today hungover I didn't drink last night. I'm just I have a Atlanta hangover because we had such an amazing weekend Yeah, we really did and we are gonna just keep on traveling because why not we don't care if there's one of you We're five million of you that says we're just gonna keep doing them. We'd love doing those shows So thank you for giving us such a great time. And next up, this week, we are going to Chapel Hill where we're going to be doing Real Housewives of Orange County. And then in Richmond, Virginia on Friday, we're going to be doing the Real Housewives of Dallas.

And then we're going to Tampa, Fort Lauderdale, Indianapolis, Chicago, Chicago, NYC, NYC, St. Louis, Philadelphia, Philadelphia, Denver, Seattle, Crapies and LA 2020 crappy awards, then Detroit, Columbus, two shows in Austin, Texas, and Houston, Texas. May I make some very quick notes? The first New York show is now officially officially sold out. The second show has literally five tickets left. So definitely, I'm going to say you'll really want to get tickets to that show. We can't say why. And then the first awesome show is sold out. And tomorrow we have a big announcement. We are announcing three new cities. One of them, I could not be more excited for it. It's going to be amazing, but we can't say it now. Okay, I'm sorry, sorry, you'll more excited for it, it's gonna be amazing, but we can't say it now, okay? I'm sorry, sorry, you'll just have to wait for tomorrow's

below deck recap. Okay. Also, why don't you tell people about merch? Oh my God, the merch is awesome. We have a Shannon Bulldoer design, which is basically Shannon Bedor with a bowl on her head, which I mean, who doesn't want that? I can't wait for mine to come in.

And then we also have, if life gives you talkers, make talkers salads in honor of Cameron Westcott, and we also have a DORK and a TWAP! Look, so it's really awesome, it's great. You just go to watchacrapins.com for merch, and also for tickets. Everything you could ever possibly want is there. That's our hub. That's also where you find links to all our Patreon stuff. For instance, did you know that this recap is on crap and on demand, which means you could be watching us. If you're watching us, you could see that Ron and I are

plaid twins today. I know we keep wearing the same shirt lately. It's weird. It's weird, but I like it. Do you know what my plaid period is? I'm going through PMS, plaid, menstrual system, but that doesn't even close to what PMS stands for. The point is this, go to www.wattrocraftens.com for everything you could possibly want, and your life will be better and more fulfilled. Yes, we've got wrappons on demand today and tomorrow, which are not our normal on-demand recaps,

we're doing Merri to Medicine, and below that tomorrow, well, so these should be fun videos. So let's get to it, shall we? Married to Medicine. Married to Medicine, I have to thank one of our listeners sent me a link on Twitter. Basically, basically a Twitter link that allowed me to see the Twitterers of those two painting strippers.

Thank you, thank you. If you wanna see what those guys look like, it's not safe for work. It's not safe for work, but if you want to, you know, scroll away your phone into a private space and look, think it's at exotic paintings. It's apparently, it's like a, like a troop.

It's, it's several naked troubadours who pose. And by the way, when you see the videos on there, what we saw in marriage medicine was tame. They don't normally just walk around naked. Okay, so what, when I'm not saying that when that stripper picked up, heavenly, like she should be like, okay, with that because it is still like sort of violationy. But when you see what they normally do to women, whoa, whoa, hey, so go watch that and enjoy it. Thank you. Wow, we should just do that instead of watching this whole episode.

I know. We're going to miss the opportunity when we're in Atlanta. We could have had a paint and sip with exotic, exotic paintings. So this episode is basically another rehash of every single fight that has been going on this season because no one really knows how to deal with the fight. So they just keep having them over and then over and then over and then over. And then they go, sorry.

And then like, yeah, we're all sisters now. Okay. It's like the bull arrow, right? You do like a variation over and over again, but each time we just becaue it was more and more intense and somehow at the end you're like, that was wonderful. Yeah, it's well, I think it's like anti-smoking cessation, like my papa when he quit smoking

He did at old school where they put you in this little room and then they just make you smoke multiple smacks of smacks packs of cigarettes at one time until you're totally disgusted with it and you leave their feeling sick and you're so disgusted by cigarettes and maybe that's what they're doing They're just gonna keep throwing them in vans and letting them go out each other until they're sick of it and they come out nice. But guess what? Doesn't work. By the way, speaking of smoking, Ronnie had a near-death experience yesterday on the way back from the airport when we're taking our Uber from LAX to home from Atlanta. Roni almost died. You almost died. The Uber almost. We all almost died. You almost died. The Uber almost, we all almost died. You almost died, but in the most beautifully scented way possible.

Yeah, so we're driving along and it's really sad in California right now because there's fires and people are losing their homes. And we never know when we're flying back into these fires, what it's going to look like. One time it looked like Armageddon when they were here by the, by the freeway stuff. Yeah, when we came back here, we didn't, we saw a lot of smog and smoke and stuff, but we didn't see actual fires, which was, you know, thank God, but we were driving in and I, we got on the freeway and I said, God, isn't that so sad? You smell the fire.

Then was like, no, I don't think that's fire. Well, no, first I was like, I do, but it's like, you know, it's so funny because this forest fire kind of like, it smells sort of nice. It smells sort of It smells like smores like yeah, it smells like roasted marshmallows Like this is like you know as like as like forest fires go this one smells really good like why why does this one smells so good You know Ben's on yelp like rating the fire high, you know, he's like wow This is what a delicious smelling forest fire Well, this is what a delicious smelling forest fire. Thanks.

So we kept driving and we were like, well, wait, is that burnt marshmallow? I said, who's roasting marshmallows? Like, what's happening? And then I felt like the sun was on my leg a little too much and I was like, oh, that's normal, but I'm not in the sun. This like, is not in the sun. Oh my god, I'm on fire. I'm on fire. I'm on fire!

It's a huge story. I mean, it was like burning fire, it wasn't, it was dark fire, it wasn't like flame fire. Yeah. But it started to hurt and I was like, oh Jesus, it's because I had this stupid little vape thing in my pocket and I guess, you know, these are just big long batteries

and I use them to quit smoking like I quit smoking so now I just have these And the I guess it was pressed hard down in my pocket So it thought it was being pushed so the battery was just on on on cooking cooking cooking and it started cooking the oils in the thing Oh my god, I was more It was smoking. Yeah, smoking it was like on fire God, I was more It was smoking. Yeah, it was smoking. It was like on fire And that Uber driver stayed very calm. I don't know if he just wasn't listening to us if he just didn't know what was going on But he was in a Zen state. He didn't care. He did not care. Yeah, I was like sir I'm so sorry. I didn't hurt your car. I had nothing to stay in. I didn't know a lot.

And he just kept driving. So man, I'm thinking God that was on, on Ben, how I was said, Builer's Uber. Yeah. He was on Builer's Uber rating, not mine. No, you were the one who called that Uber. Damn it, I better check it. No, he was fine.

He was totally cool. When I said goodbye to him, he was like very, very chill. So I don't think he minded. Yes, because I was happy. Plus, by the way, it smelled delicious. It was like, as near death experiences go, that was one of the most beautifully scented ones ever, ever, ever, ever. But you know what, Ronnie, that was almost a medical emergency. Yeah. Well, hey, I still have my attempt to burn anything. That was my attempt at a a segue. Wow, did you burn your leg? Do you need any medicine, Ronnie?

I might need a pink to tick, man, to feel better. Oh, no. Well, that's one thing those guys don't have to worry about because they don't have any pockets. Yeah. Yeah, so anyway, marriage, a medicine. By the way, did you yet, we have not discussed this. Have you noticed that in the opening credits

for this season, Contestas in the Center? I didn't notice that until tonight, but that is my first note. I said, Chrome is in the center. What the fuck had it? I just noticed that. How did that happen? It's almost like, is it like one of those things

where like everyone had to vote on who they want to be in the center and And then everyone split the votes. So therefore contest our rows to the top. You know? Yeah, I'm not really sure how that happened, but I was pretty snobged. Yeah. And like Mariah's all the way like last. I was like, this doesn't make sense. And I think they're also using the composite images from previous seasons,

opening credits. So they all look a little different. And I think they stretch them a little bit. So that way they have sort of have the same height or whatever so they all look like out of proportion. You know when you take a picture of someone on TV but your camera is at a weird angle so their heads are really big but their bodies are small. There's a lot of weird stuff going on.

There's layers that open in credits. Yeah, they really are. So she ended up in the middle and then that song just still keeps killing me how that's like doctor this doctor Dr. Jackie dr. Simone dr. Contessa And Mariah has like a three part off key harmony at the end and I was like okay because she's officially the craziest It's like their inner voices are their new Destiny's child backup singers, you know? It's like they told, that was probably like the 45th cut

of that opening credit and they keep telling the announcer, okay, all we want you to do is say their names, but the spirit of the show just gets into it. It's like, okay, I got it this time. Dr. Jackie, Dr. Simone, Dr. Heavenly. Oh, Contessa. Qua! Ha!

Qua! And then the Mariah one gets three. I was cracking up at Mariah's three-part non-harmony because it's just so Mariah, you know, it's so loony tunes. And then Mariah came out full-force loony tunes from Yeah. And then Mariah came out full force loony tunes for Mariah today. Yeah, we got it like, you know, it always takes about five episodes before Mariah starts to dig up her grudge from five years ago.

Yeah. So she's been trying, but she has not gone on her full rampage like she did today. And it was hilarious, especially because thank you, Botox. I mean, Botox does such a good things for us. Like Mariah looks so pretty pretty but nothing on that face moves except her well obviously her mouth but then her eyes so when she cries she just can go like this and it looks like she's got like a hair in her eye because nothing

else is moving like she got shampoo in her eye. It's like Yeah, Like she's doing that deep guttural crime, but it's just like she's got shampoo in her eye Yeah, today was like a very exciting episode because they went to Savannah which by the way Savannah I apologize to Savannah not because this cast went there but because Savannah like They deserved a better southern charm. They really did and I I don't know they can re, I hope they're able to reboot it with like a proper cast. I mean, I liked the people on that cast, but just was not like what that show needed,

right? So I apologize to Savannah, because seeing this here, I was like, Savannah deserved better. Also loved that this week we got to see a quad bust out her. I'm a talent all spokeswoman wig that was really good to you know which one was that it was like a short blonde wig which is like let me tell you about pain I think more I think quad actually does a lot of those poses that she could be in those headache commercials like when the ladies just like this, because Quatt does this, just pose a lot with just her fingers on her temples. She is both the example and an answer.

Yeah. Because she sometimes looks like she is like suffering and needs the Tylenol. And sometimes she looks like she's walking in front of like a diagram of like the human body with like pain going to their head, you know. Oh yeah. Okay, it's gonna be one of those episodes.

So, so we start though, where we see lots of stuff going on around Atlanta, and we see contestors at home with Scott, and he's based, she's, she's getting ready for the Savannah trip and she's like, are you gonna be okay with the kids? Well, I'm gone. He's like, back like something's different. All pissy still. Yeah, that's going great over at that house. He's like, are you gonna be okay with the kids while I'm gone? He's like, back like something's different.

All pissy still. Yeah, it's going great over at that house. Yeah, great work. Then Troy is packing and she's like, oh jeez, I don't even have hatels up at those. I can't even fight the other way. And he's like, well, at least this is Jackie's trip and you won't be looking at a bunch of penises.

Yeah, she's really going through it with her handle this life. And then, then we land on heavenly in her weird upstairs closet situation. Yeah, I'm set piece. Heavenly will only suit in her closet. We know that. She loves that closet. Yeah, and I'm like, is it a closet or is it like a hallway that she put racks up in? I don't get it.

It feels like oddly non-confined. Yeah, I don't get it. It feels like oddly like non confined. Yeah, I want that they're making it a closet slash like she said kind of thing. Yeah, because later a duck or daddy tries to watch TV in there and say, that's my ring. Yeah, it's a big big daddy dilemma. So she's like trying to pick out a white dress for this trip. And a Laura's like, that's not cute, mommy, which I'm like, wow, I'm happy that a Laura's really at that phase where she's just like, shame.

I guess she's actually always been in that phase. I'm like, she came out of that. She came out of the womb at that phase. She came out going like, where? Yeah, wow. She's gonna be like, wow, really? With that hospital apron, really? Wow.

But like, unlike maybe Brandi's get on Dallas We actually always seem to like really believe a Laura. We're like yeah. Yeah, Laura's got it right Yeah, Laura's on it So a Laura let's see so Heavenly's like well, I mean daddy have to talk and she's like why are you pretending like I want to be here? Like I don't have anything else to do. I'm gonna leave anyway mother. Go downstairs. So now daddy is daddy's time to confront heavenly about the penis and painting party. And he's like well I hear you guys had some kind of dance expo or something. Yes, it was a dance expo. Oh, okay.

It was 900 ladies from all across Texas who came to, you know, compete in aerobics. Yeah, it was 900 ladies who came to paint pictures and also learn how to do a routine to Gloria. So my mother came in third. Thank you, El Paso Civic Center. Did she really? She did a dance expo. Oh, yeah. My my mom was an aerobic star I've never told you when you did tell me that I know she participated in dance expos oh hell yeah there were like

stadiums of people she would like lead that yeah like the main lady of the out-passo team wow that's I just I love your backstory it just always is it just gets richer and richer and richer every episode. And I'm like, my backstory is like, my parents got me Hestrox when I was in Marhanaca. Like not interesting. Oh, boom. So yeah, my mom was a stop, which is why she said,

diva, she'll still walk into a restaurant. Like, do you know who I am? They're like, yes, ma'am. We loved your aerobics DVDs Or would we we'd love to aerobics beta maxes back in the day. I mean very Ramona singer very Yes, I was heard that was her life. Yeah, and my mother often does say you know support other women So daddy's like I heard you a little dance and have them like oh Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.. Okay.. Okay. Okay.. Okay to lubricate you. It tries out your vocal chords. Well, the temporarily there's liquid rushing over them. I can do low. I can do the low heavenly. You know what you go to her low register? I was taking a pack. Nobody knew that there. I'm turning into Chelsea. No. Yeah. And he goes, yeah, but nobody walked in and then left again. She's like, how could we do that, daddy? It was about the party, daddy. He was like, I thought it was in poor taste. And then he, and then he's like, but I heard that somebody picked you up. And she goes, oh, I didn't get a chance to tell you about it.

I'm sorry, everyone. I'm just like torture, torture hearing this heavily, but when the vocals pull out dual, when the instrument, I didn't get a chance to tell you about it because you know, you get home so late and you know, you're so tired and we have sex and we go to sleep. So I really don't have time to tell you nothing, which is her way of saying like, don't remember how we have sex every night. So you better not complain. Okay.

You better. And she's also, she also made him look like such a man that he has sex every 9 he did smile a little when she said that he's like okay you know like you made me look like more of a man on TV after emasculating me so he's like well it's just that you always have these things like it's okay and I don't want another man touching my wife it was a joke it was a little boy he was 20 years old and I said little boy I've got a son you're right I've got a son you're right little boy and they got to get away from me you walk right away from me and then it like cuts the flashback

of her going let me see let me see let me see let me see let me see let me see little boy come here come here little boy she's opening the door of a white van suddenly like come here little boy I got some candy in here little boy she's dropping little andes candies on the ground to leading to the white van but then she's also eating them there's only wrappers so no one ever follows uh so daddy's like you you know what? Just stop talking. I'm going to watch TV up here. She's like, wait a minute. This is my room. So now he's like taking ownership to get her back.

He's going to watch her TV. And then she also says, she's like, daddy, I only have eyes for you. And the men's penis is where little. So like, don't you worry. And like I said, you can go to ad exotic paintings to see if she was telling the truth. She's not.

Jackie's new house. Whoa. So guess what? Jackie has a mission today. You guys are going to be surprised. She's like, I hope they're on time because I will leave them. I'm hoping that the girls will understand my whole mission for this trip is revival. Oh gosh. And the way she's going to start the revival is by serving everyone

muffins, but then cutting them in half to make sure no one eats a lot. Yeah. And then saving them later for eating muffins. Yeah. Exactly. You can be lecturing people about diabetes and then serving them muffins at your parties. Like you need to play in Jackie Yeah, like just don't serve the muffins in the first place Jackie. Yeah, so Yeah, I bet Curtis bought them. You know what? I know what I'm gonna say I bet she did not get the muffins But then Curtis brought them in he's like here I thought the leads might like this and she's like fuck well, I'm not gonna throw out muffins But I guess I'll cut them in half. So I'm blooming on Curtis,

because that's my right as a podcaster. Yeah, Curtis is a fault for everything. Yeah. So Jackie's like, we had funny Toys party. However, there are loose ends. She tells Curtis, it's like doing CPR and he's like, yeah, but that doesn't work if the person's like, already dead, Jackie.

It's like, oh, yes, it'll work. We're gonna get healed muffins biscuits So she can all call them fat. So then heavenly comes first and Curtis answers the door and she's like Hello, Curtis. What's your wife? How's your wife doing? How's your wife Curtis? How's your wife? I would never talk to a man And let's see what's about his wife because that's an appropriate Curtis Yeah, and he's like oh, she's in there cooking. She's like oh, daddy Cook cooking Jackie cooking. No, she doesn't cook. She just like delivers babies. She doesn't cook so Pretend to be a real wife now and then Mariah raps next and she's like good morning Which I know is I know that's like a slang,

but I also feel like it's also the way that Mariah like rev, I think that like, it in just while heavenly is going. Thank you for the great slourd. Well, she's saying grace. I mean, she says grace on everything. Sounds fair, everything. That's Lord. Thank you for the great slourd.

So Mariah is like, I love your beautiful home. And Jack is like, well, things seem better with Mariah. And I since I apologize, but you know Mariah. She's like that tricky patient where things can take turns for the worst in a split second. A baby's coming out. You've got the legs and it's coming. It's coming. And then it's mother jumps out of the vagina and starts hitting you over the head with

the purse. Is that Candace and Dorothy? Candace and Dorothy, or you? That's Mama. That's Mama's. Oh, Mama. That's Mama, traffic out of the womb. Mama, leave it. No, Bravo.

I like that Bravo is developing a tradition of purse smack and moms. You know, now they just need to have like Ruth Busy on here and then we'll be set So Jackie Jack C. Solce here so Jackie makes Curtis go get him and C. Solce just basically there to go I want you dad you guys to know that eight and eight and told us and We're gonna be doing a sip and see while you're gone too. Yeah. Yeah. And Simone's like, our husbands know that they're not gonna have a sip and paint or a or uh... Clinton color nothing

nothing she's definitely she's definitely taking the sexy out of it yeah our husbands are boring okay they won't be having a gashin goose nothing like that

nothing like that a fallopian and stencil like that doesn't even alliterate a spray and Jay Uterus and what are I know I'm like it so turns out that a lot of parts of female anatomy do not alliterate well with art art over and ceramics see can't do it. So let's see so they're like why why Mariah? Let's see and think. Jack is like come on Mariah.

Why did you tell Aiden? You know he's going to tell the other guys why and Mariah is like did you tell Aiden? You know he's gonna tell the other guys, why? And Mariah is like, I didn't do anything. I said a selfie. I said a selfie. You sent a photo to Aiden and he told Aiden all about it. This is why she's in such a smith later in the episode because Jackie puts Mariah on the spot.

Jackie puts Mariah on blast. And that's how Mariah works. She's put on blast. She feels a certain sort of way and then it just builds up inside of her. It's almost like Jackie turned on the oven and it was pre-eating for most of the episode. And then finally, it's like, now the oven timer is like feet,

now the oven's beeping and saying, I'm ready. I'm ready and I'm gonna be mad about something. Yeah, and that's something is Mariah. So she's like, what, I just sent a selfie and then They show that pick with the strippers huge tongue that comes down to like my belly button just crazy Yeah, and then Heavenly's like yeah, I didn't even know until Damon came home and got pissed off about it That's not cool. I'm right. I said you ain't gonna put this on me. You ain't gonna put this on me

You're gonna put it on me like it was't gonna put it on me. Like it was you, it was literally you, and everybody does it with you. Yeah. So then everyone else arrives, and it's like more chatter and stuff. And then they hop onto this bus to go to Savannah, which is gonna be a four hour drive. So Jackie is excited because she's already proposing the idea that there's gonna be some girl code, and they're going to have girl code and they're going to learn about girl code and

that's going to be the big crux of these. My girl code is girlfriend code. Oh, I'm sorry, you're right. You're a girlfriend code. You need to be able to trademark it, okay? So now she's got a girl friend code. For the book. Yeah.

Yeah. And Heavenly walks on the bus and of course it's like, thank Jesus. So they can. And Heavenly walks on the bus and of course it's like thank Jesus All four tires are inflated praise Lord praise Lord so Jack explains to the trip to them She's like so the sister friend revival retreat with seafood and gaze is all about the girlfriends We have to have good girlfriend codes on seafood gaze like the like mollusks basically have good girlfriend codes on seafood gays like the like mollusks basically the mollusks have wonderful codes okay dolphins girlfriend dolphins have wonderful codes with each other okay everybody this trip there'll be lots of muscles the

kind of coming shells toya and Mariah tells us I don't know how Aiden got the picture accident but why were you worried if you were spread eagle what is Mariah tells us I don't know how Aiden got the picture accident, but why were you worried if you were spread Eagle? What is Mariah talking about she doesn't know how like it's an accident? How do you accidentally take a photo of a stripper and send it to your husband? I just like that we get to do this on video today because Mariah Mariah's moves when she talks are so funny She does do this and she's like well, and then she kind of shakes her. She always does a little shimmy. She's like, yeah. And when she has like, and when she's gonna like really be shady, she sort of like turns the she does like almost like a three quarter turn and then leans in and she goes, what she really needs to do is focus on that dress. Ting, Ting, Ting.

And Toria's like, well, it's not like, it's not like anybody touched nobody's penis. Does anybody touch any penis is in here? And someone says, Heavenly did. Heavenly is like, I'm in touch with their penis. That penis was waxed off. That doesn't turn me on. I was if any of that, that little boy picked me up. I was like, put me down, put me down, put me down.

And Toria goes, you would have fed it. He could pick you up. You it, he could pick you up. You were proud he could pick you up. And they all started cracking up. So then they all applaud. Then this like this random fight that happens, like a two second fight, where they all applaud Toya for moving into her new home.

And Heavenly goes, I love when Black people are doing great things. And Toya goes, really? Thank you, Phil, Sunsia, wishes, thank you. That's our second house. The first one we own, too. I'm like black, when black people are doing great things. And Tory goes, really? Thank you, Phil, Sanzilla. Wishes, thank you. That's our second house. The first one we own to you. I'm like, why is Tory getting mad at Heavenly, like saying something nice, right?

But then they just start to fight. Oh, God. Well, first of all, Torya said, she says, Torya moved into a new home and Torya goes, mm-hmm. I moved in the 9,000 square feet. 9,000 square feet. Thank you. It was so fucking obnoxious, mm-hmm. I moved in the 9,000 square feet. 9,000 square feet. Thank you.

It was so fucking obnoxious, Toya. And that's, yeah, heavenly. It's like, I love them. Black people do great things. It's like, oh, thanks for being sincere. And Toya, you don't own your first house still. And if you do, that's crazy. What they do with their first house, they kept it and rented it. I mean, listen, the Barbie Malibu dream home, whatever it is, does not really count as real estate. Yeah, because wasn't this one rented or are they talking about the one they moved out before? Did they just maybe rent that one and then now this is their fourth

house. They had the house that they started with, then they moved into the giant house that like, I think a basketball player used to live in there, they lived there and that's when they incurred all the debts, then they moved into the other house that was close to the sidewalk and now they're in this house. So I don't know which one, I don't think they ever owned. The big house, I don't think they ever owned. I thought they rented that one. So maybe they owned the very, very, very first house.

I'm not sure. Well, just as someone who's watched a lot of housewives and seen a lot of people get in trouble with the tax people, do not list your assets on national television where it can be used against you in the court of law later Okay, I'm just gonna be that one so that she's she's like, don't be jealous heavenly Heavily's like, jealous, what are we jealous? I make three thousand more money than you do and everyone's mortified and puppy But he says people with real money don't talk about money because wealth with prayers and money jingle jingle jingles Yeah, I didn't have a list like my house is almost paid for and toy goes it should be don't talk about money because wealth with prayers and money jingle jingle jingles. Yeah.

And then having these like my house is almost paid for and toy goes, it should be. It's only worth 50,000 dollars. So gross. Find about money, but also hilarious. So I love. I just don't understand why they're so mad. I, you know, that's what was funny to me is that they were like, they were just like, they were so mad. And even the show was like, eh, it's not worth it because me is that they were like they were just like they were so mad and even the show was like

It's not worth it because then it just sort of like cuts away And then it's like okay three hours to Savannah and it's like Buffy talking about taxes with with Contessa And it's like two hours away and Simone doing a lap dance and then they're like party party party party Then one hour away and they're all like on their phones and someone is like, do you feel any swelling on the left side? Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, someday, parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest

and insightful take on parenting. Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brown-Oller, we will be your resident not-so-expert experts. Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding, and thinking. Oh yeah, I have absolutely been there. We'll talk about what went right and wrong. What would we do differently? And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll

feel less alone. So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad free on the Amazon music or If you want to be the referee. So they go to this house called the 1890 house. Buffie's like, it's old as hell. Looks like Amityville horror over here. I know. And Toyo's like, kind of reminds me of heavenlies.

It's historic. It's old. But this one has character. Oh, I'm surprised you didn't write down the way she said character. She said, but this one has character. Key. Key.

Key of it. I was just so happy that she could say historic or even do it. I was like, wow, that's a lot of syllables for Toya. Actually, there's a book, Toya announced that she's written a book for children called Sleepyhead, Please Go To Bed. And I tried to get it on Amazon, but they don't have a sample section. You can't read a sample section of it So whatever we would have been reading that today Got about how much does it cost maybe we'll maybe

I'm not giving it to you $18 I you know what we'll see maybe maybe we'll maybe I'll buy a copy of it and we can read out a live show Sleep and have please go to bed. Yeah, leave me at go to bed. Before you go to bed, put handles on my doors. Thank you, sleepyhead. The drug can sound like a man's eight hours of sleep tonight. Otherwise, I'll take you away in an ambulance. Just think of heaven. Heaven will have sidewalks.

Lots of lots of sidewalks. Well, you should have been there. It was a good sleeping hour ago. And I was sleepyhead this morning. So go to bed, sleep me at the end. So Gina, the house host, welcome to them. It gives them all bourbon. And then they start laughing at that.

I'm like, huh? It's just the house host on all these things. It's already like, hi, I'm Gina. Welcome to bourbon. It's our dream. We might have ghosts here because the lamp fell over one time and no one knows how. I told an earthquake bitch. I know we live in Los Angeles. I know we know how it happened.

I'm so angry at her. I think it's because also she reminds me of Cameron Mannheim. Oh my god, I loved Cameron Mannheim. I know, but I love that. I love being shooting on some of these cases. Yeah, I know that's what it is. I'm not angry at camera manheim But I like I feel her rage towards people she prosecutes or defends or whatever so then I'm like I'm angry at that lamp case dismissed Cam dismissed Okay, so you know all she did was offer bourbon and talk about a lamp and I'm mad at her Color a bitch. I know because because that was kind of the lame

disco story ever, you know? It was like, you should know, a Bravo cast is coming to a house in Savannah. Everyone's gonna wanna talk about how it's haunted. Have you not learned yet, Gina? I know, I mean, I also feel bad for that. She basically also outed that ghost as just being her clumsy ass ghost.

Like, most ghosts are like scary and try to kill you. And this one's just like walking around, knocking over lambs byacks and like, fuck. Yeah. Oh, well, just a very unrefined ghost lives here. Okay, everyone enjoy your sleep. I think that most ghosts are actually like that. I think that most ghosts are just like,

I don't think they're out to kill us. I think they're just like walking around, listening in on conversations, gossiping afterwards, and then they like knocks them over. It's like toy story, you know? When we're not looking, they're all chattering and having fun, and then they like knocks something over. It's like toy story. You know, when we're not looking, they're all chattering and having fun. And then if they do something wrong,

they're like, oh no, Buzz had to like go back to an inanimate state, but he's in the middle of the room. And now the humans can be like, how did this get here, you know? Yeah, they just get caught. Maybe it was lamp story. Lamp story. Lampy.

Ghost story. The real story. Lampy. Ghost story. The real ghost story out probably be really boring. It's like, well, life sucked and this sucks now, so. Just someone who has. Guess I'll play a PlayStation. A bored ghost who just likes to fuck with Gina a little bit. Well, I guess Gina's doing a tour tomorrow, so I should knock her for a lamp.

You know what I'm going to do? I'm going gonna take all the top sheets off the bed and this house. That's what I'm talking about. Yeah, they didn't even notice that that was the work of a ghost. Uh, so Contessa is praying and she's like, I went to college in New Orleans and I know the ghost infested house feels like. And I'm gonna be constipated because I'm not closing any doors even the bathroom. I don't know that I think Ghost famously walked through walls

Yeah, like listen, I'm not a huge horror movie fan, but I have seen Casper Like once maybe and I'm pretty sure Casper's whole thing is that he walks through walls, right? I don't think a ghost who wants to kill you is going to sit outside the bathroom waiting until you food. Well, this goes, this goes my, this goes seems like a pretty polite ghost. Yeah, it's like, I'm hate it. I want to bother you while you were in the bathroom, but I knocked over a lamp. Hey, when you're done in there, you might need to go on to Amazon because I knocked over the lamp and I'm not sure it's, I I may have broken the light bulb so just be really careful because there's a perfect glass down there. So Jackie breaks them all up into

teams and she actually puts them with because I have to share rooms and she breaks them up into people that actually like each other. Shocking. Yeah which is crazy. So Jackie is gonna be with Kintessa anduffy is going to be with Simone, right? And Quad is going to be with Heavenly, and then Mariah is going to be with Toya. Mm-hmm. And so let the room chasing begin. Jackie says, you can choose whatever room you'd like.

Just please leave the third floor for me. I'm like, only Jackie would request the third floor, like three flights of stairs. Yeah, exactly. So they go running for rooms, and I don't know if you noticed this, Petoya and Buffie go up, like they just like go charging for the rooms,

and Toya just slams Buffie into Gina. She's just like, like full on, like it is like a side-tack, and she's like, boom, and I mean Buffie goes plowing into Gina. You know, Gina's like, well, as long as as I have a moment I might as well put this lamp back I'll put it right here on the edge of oh god. It's on the floor. It goes again Yeah, they're like oh my god the ghost got the lamp again. It's curious about

So quads like don't do that. I'm not gonna do that let those ladies run for the rooms I'm not gonna do that. Let those ladies run for the rooms. I will not run for room. Instead, I'm gonna stay here and tell you about chronic pain that you can fix with Tylenol. Oh, Adam Fahd, Dr. S'Recommended. But not Dr. Gregory. Dr. Gregory is Dr. No. 5. he never recommends what's good for you. They're looking at their rooms and quiet as telling Heavenly, Do we share the same restroom? And Heavenly's like, Oh Lord, this bed is too soft for my back Lord. It's too soft for my back Lord.

It's not for the soft mattress. So then Mariah, I mean, while it wants to cover up the mirrors, because she heard that's how ghosts, the ghosts, like mirrors are like the portals or whatever. So she threw, they like threw like a towel over, toya throws like a towel, I think, over like a mirror, which sort of partially, like I think it's like, I don't know, it seems like there's a lot of mirror still exposed. I feel like the ghost will probably just like have to duck,

you know, and come through. So I think it'll, I'm absolutely just looks up from under the towel. Like, you know, let me in or we're gonna have to just wait in here. Yeah. And Toyota's like, oh, the candles on the side bow, because the candle I tilted over and more like,

oh, Buffy and Simone. So this is where we find out, Simone goes, here's the thing, Buffy. This bed doesn't have a top sheet. And Buffy's like, da da, brought seats! Yeah.

You travel with sheets and she goes, it's practical. Listen, Simone, I don't want to hear you but a whole other house have a shorter commute okay she spent like twenty dollars a target yeah so they all have to dress in white and they get in the van to go to their revival dinner and Jack is like this is a revival you go in and you check out people in the tent meeting and quad like oh our revival meeting that was a thing in the south you go in you S play out you get on the ground and you release what Satan is left inside of you

I'm like why do you do that when you open up the dishwasher? I know quad quad you do that when you open like the the sour curtain it's like I'm glad you do that when you open like the the sour curd. It's like Fritz world pub dishwasher what you have for me today Walk has some residue Comet why have you failed me today? Ehh! Some of these people need to stretch down to the floor with their arms and ask God to rebuke the demon that's within. Orrick vacuum cleaner, please suck up that just!

Ehh! No, I'm tried, I've gone over that fleck-fived omelette. Do not take it. Why? So then they go to the revival house restaurant and it's, it's got, when wall is done in canes. Yes, I know that also walking canes and one wall is done with shoe stretchers. It's like this. Oh, I just don telling quite a story.

I don't think I'd even know what a shoe stretcher would look like. I know that it's from things that go in shoes and then there's like a screw thing and you turn it and it's slowly stretches out the shoes. I know this because I took a can't take feet. Okay. Wouldn't it be funny if shoe stretchers were actually just like tiny little gurneys that would like you just put a shoe on it and I take it off to the shoe hospital Yeah, but then people keep falling very bad because they've only got one shoe on a gurney

It's very marriage medicine shoe medicine So yeah, so they have a bunch of walking kins walking sticks on the wall, which I noticed uh, which was kind of cool But I also felt like that like at some point I was really hoping that I got women were just like taking off the wall and just start fencing with them. So they say grace, they have all this food that looks absolutely amazing. And I'm gonna try the Mac and Remnie Lord. Yeah. God's like,

now made Jesus Christ your waiter. So I don't know if that's really appropriate, but okay. Yeah, God's like, listen, I'm sort of like dealing with some chaos in the Middle East, but I'm really happy you're having the Mac and cheese. I really am. Thanks. Thanks for the update. Lord, I'd love some more breadsticks. Thank you, Lord. Lord, I'm just gonna have some, I'm just gonna move my chair a little bit to get close to my food. Thank you, pray for Lord. I got close to the table. He's like, uh, thanks. Or she. Or she. Thanks.

So anyway, they're sitting at the table and then there's like silence because it's awkward. And then Contessa gets a text from Scott. So Scott is going to be going out of town for three days, for his 50th birthday. He's going to do a boys trip. And he like just went and got the ticket and already booked it and it's going to do it.

And so Contessa's actually showing it to Toya, who I guess this is her way of building bridges with her. So she's all mad, because she's like, you didn't even talk to me. So I gave it my whole Nashville program because obviously it was too hard not having both parents. And then the moment I do, he just goes off, right?

Which I actually, I do understand. I understand that in his mind, he's thinking, well, I haven't had a moment to myself. So now I finally have a moment to myself so now I finally kind of a moment to myself But I understand her point which is like oh, so now you're just are gonna. I'm like the babysitter again Well, he's she's like well, he's he can do that. I just want him to tell me he's gonna do it and to it's like No, no, you're acting like at one On one side you're saying that him lived his best life.

But then on the other hand, you're saying like how dare he and she's like, no, I just want him to let me do it too. I'm like, you're at a party right now with your girlfriends out of town. Yeah. And Tori is like, well, be a dude. You'd have a deal that if we got something going on that we have to agree that we can have something go it on. And she's like, yes, that's it. And Jackie goes, you know, you're actually being very passive aggressive right now,

which is the music. And then the music, and it was so funny is that when Jackie says that, there was like really not no music, and the music goes, dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun. Like, oh, here comes the fight. Like dun dun dun dun dun.

And Contesa goes, yeah. And then the music just goes away. I was like, wait, what was that? Yeah, she agrees, because it's so obvious, and I'm so, so one thing I like about these people, like they tell each other, it's like yeah, you're just being passive aggressive. She's like, okay.

I think that Kadesa had a right to be annoyed, but I think they were right and it's like, okay, you have a right to be annoyed, but you also have to like, you have to focus on like, do you want to be this way or that way? Like channel your annoyance into a productive way, not into pacifagression, even though I love watching people be passive aggressive on TV. Yeah.

So Jackie says, part of the sister friend revival, gay, shrimp and cocktails is it's Savannah old southern charm and it's like, oh, that's so rude. That's so rude to bring that up. It's a slam. It's a time to hit reset buttons, because we've messed up a lot. And so I want to write the girlfriend code. Why are we friends?

I'm like, just write casting on a big poster board and stick it up somewhere. Yeah, just write you on TV. Yeah. That's a girlfriend code. But no, Jackie's gone to Hobby Lobby and gotten scrolls and shit. even taking the time to like burn The edges of the scrolls so they look like you know, you're all gonna get lost. Oh, let's see

Yeah, I look like she's about to put some scrolls into a cap and sand is gonna come in yell at them all But what about the table you spend all this time Dr. Jackie making these scrolls? I want a nice table for this revival So let's see so Mariah is already bad. She's already like, here's the thing Jackie, we do this year after year after year and it feels like smoke mirrors to me. Leave it to Mariah to be the like the voice of reason in this situation. And then we see like a flashback, which is very generous because it only shows the lemon squeeze, a forgiveness ceremony,

a pajama party. That's only three. This is season seven. We know there are at least four other ritual that that Jackie put together. That didn't even make it into the montage. And two out of three involved Mariah being a dick at these things. So when they're trying to do like Mariah ruining all of them, you know, and my favorite one was, Jackie, I read an article, and you were comparing me to Harpies. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. I had forgotten about that. So many moments in this show, and they're really giving us

the best out of this episode. They really were. And so, and then Mariah makes a weird, weird thing. She goes, how many resets can you do some tapes I think you just need to eject and throw away Well, she says that because quad goes this is a reset moment because we're human Which doesn't really make it sounds nice, but doesn't really make any sense But you also don't reset tapes you rewind them, you know, you know, basically they

Lots of metaphors is going back and forth here that just don't really mix, but it's fine. So, so, Jackie's like, we're gonna write down the girlfriend code and have only goes, Jesus Christ, Lauren, she has squirrels again. They're all gonna think of arts and crafts. And then Jackie hands out her little squirrel to quad and she goes, this is for your one girlfriend code one singular is when scroll gonna be enough for you quad

I'm very offended I'm in a hard lot and I've worked at many scrolls many scrolls because no one can tell me how many scrolls have and it is my route to have as many as I want and I will tell you when I feel comfortable about how many scrolls I have chosen. Now, girlfriend code number one. Unrolling the scroll. You're not getting...

Let's press it over apparently. My girlfriend code is I need a riot, rider diet chick. You're not going to be the girl who says leave your husband, but if I I need a rider, rider diet chick. You're not gonna be the girl who says, leave your husband, but if I do need to go, you'll be, beep, beep, beep, beep, out there backing up that truck. Yeah. Okay.

So you're the girl who wants to listen to, you're everyone to listen to how your husband's a bastard and his cheating on you, but they're not allowed to give you the good advice, which is to leave. But then finally, when you're done, we're supposed to all get up in the middle of the day and help you live.

Sorry. Do you normally have your girlfriend? I've been that girlfriend too many times. Yeah, the writer die thing is like, the writer die thing is like a little nebulous, right? Because that's also very subjective, because one person thinks they're being writer die by saying one thing and then the other person, you know, people also like they abuse right or die. We sit on these shows all the time. Like you're supposed to be my right or die.

I can't believe you didn't buy me a ticket to, you know, Shazam, you're supposed to be my right or die. People like people abuse right or die. So I think it's the bad character I'm with. So the next one is, she's like, oh well first she tells us, since I went through the stuff the Curtis and I went through I I know what a good girlfriend looks like smells like tastes like Like what the hell Jackie so then girlfriend code number two Open this girl and she goes don't lie on yourself or others and then it's a

Then we get a clip of Quad telling Toya, well at least I don't just go around saying that Eugene and Toya were driving around drunk and hit somebody and then left the scene. And then he's like, wait a minute, so now you're just lying, we just make stuff up. Exactly.

And then Heavenly is mad about this rule because she's, you know, because they're everyone's saying like don't tell lies and heaven's like Well, it was a lie when Simone say that I that she told me something in confidence and it wasn't in confidence at all So that was a lie. That was a lie. That was like daddy said it was a lie to it And like just no one picks up the bait. No one's like we're not gonna fight about this She just is like muddle again in the corner and they're like we're just gonna move forward and then we get more like lips Heavenly telling Mariah you say you're at retreat on my house, but I want to see the retreat on my husband in the corner and they're like, we're just gonna move forward. And then we get more like clips of heavenly telling Mirat,

you say you're at retreat on my house, but I want to see the retreat on my husband. And then we get the clip of Lisa Marie and quad having lunch outside of that strip mall. And y'all just yelling at each other. And it ends with Lisa Marie throwing water in her face and going, what about you? That's being relationship. There really have been so many wonderful moments over the seasons. I've said it before, I'm really enjoying this season.

This has probably been my favorite one along. I like last season too, but it feels like the show is a little tighter for me this season because it's focusing really on the women and not the relationships. And so it's really good, but I had been sort of down on the show for a few years, but looking back with all these clips, I'm like, man, even though I was down on the show, it really has some really funny moments.

Yeah, their clips are great. So then the next thing is, oh, well, Heavenly is like, well, sometimes people straight up lie, like, oh, well, never mind straight up lie like, oh well, never mind the heavenly thing, you and everything. But the Mariah though is getting mad because Mariah starts sitting there. Yeah, sorry. She's sitting in the corner.

She's also getting drunk. So she's sitting there in the corner muttering sort of like an old lady at a bar. Well, she's like, well, you know, people talk about lying about what about assumptions, you know, like, you know, what about like, you know, like Jackie, Jackie assumed that like when she said that thing about me doing drugs on her podcast, that was an assumption that I was on drugs. I was not just muddering about that. I'm like, how about the assumption that that's what happened on the podcast? Because that's not what happened.

Jackie asked if it was right for a quad to say that you were on drugs. That was what it was. It wasn't, wasn't Jackie on the podcast saying, well, I heard that Mariah is shooting up in a back alley. Yeah. So her rule is, if you're bold enough to make statements, you should do research behind it. For instance, you never said quads said that quads said those things. The way you said it it it became Jackie's thing saying it and that's why I was mad and Jackie's like, okay, good point Yes, the point is that you've got to do your research and you have to be big enough to apologize as I have Right Mariah Mariah's like

Mariah's like well, we're never women enough to say this is wrong. And I don't even know why I didn't question such foolishness. It's like Mariah, shut up with your victim ass. You started some of the most vile disgusting rumors and not people on this. So I can't with you. I know the worst. And every year she gets kicked off, then she comes back. Then she gets kicked off, then she comes back.

And every time she gets another chance, she does something like this and just wrecks herself. I know, she's ridiculous. Well, because she's like very bad about taking personal accountability and she's really good at holding grudges and that's just like her thing. So then we go to code number three, which is clearly written by Quatt because even though Jackie was like, you're only allowed to have one rule. Quatt's like, Fad, I will only have one rule, but I will make it as long as possible.

So this is her rule, what she wrote down on her scroll. Defend your girlfriend's privacy and know that her personal business is not owed to you. But if or when she comes to you, our responsibility is to support her with love and never judge. And she's like the entire time. She's like nodding like yes. Yes, I wrote that. Thank you everyone. Yes. And then she finally, and then at the end she goes, I wrote that. It's like everyone's like, yeah. We know. We know. And she says, if I, for example, if I say, say toria give me that fork That's one thing, but then I could say toria may I please see that fork Do you see the difference there and they're just all staring at her?

Tor is like I should be able to say something without a preconceived ocean like quad is your divorce vital yet And quads like are you in quad about my business? Because if you remember go code number three, which was just stated Let a woman have a privacy until even when what transpires is that she wants to say something You give her the fork and then she will share with you a part of her privacy But I would like to tell you we have come to an agreement and we have decided to rap and everyone's like thank God She's like we share you share congrats girl. Do you still mean that flock? So then we get to

These are all He's like I'm not perfect and sometimes I need help because I'm just not perfect And I make the states and I just need support from other women just need support and so she's Please accept my success her rule is her rule is accept me for who I am I'm flawed. I'm gonna screw up, but my heart is clear. Please, they also accept my success. I never said I was the best mother in the world, but give me some credit for trying.

Who? And Tori is like, oh, Buffy wrote that one, obviously. So Buffy's crying, and she's like, it's real. It's real, guys. I had to cut women out of my life, because I struggled to share the good, the bad, and the very good. Success sucks sometimes. It's very lonely.

Sometimes it's hard. It's hard when you just reach those top tiers of success that having an accounting firm can bring you. It's hard to tell people I'm killing it. I thought like five tax returns for people today. I'm killing it and people just don't respect that you have never been shaded in Tumble Indigate shades you So she's like yeah, a Torious laughing Torious laughing at her and she's like, okay girl That may be why you haven't got girlfriends because you say that they're at the top We're at the top and they're at the bottom like who who says that? By the way, my house is 9,000 square feet. I also own another one. That's all.

That's all. What you should have did was say, my name is Buffy and girl code number five is I hate myself. So then, and then this is clearly having lose. I think it's having lose. It might be some owns, but it's code number five. Don't disrespect a husband, especially in the wife's presence. Family is off limits, which of course will never be followed. Yeah. And then we get a clip of Simone being mad at heavenly sharing personal business that she talked about all season on camera last year. And then your husband's as big as a bitch.

And then heavenly, I can tell you a lot of people that slept with them and oh yeah Heavenly I can tell you a lot of people that slept with them and you want me to bring rest So now Jackie now they ought to like candles and is a lot of like you let her light and you let her light and you let her Lie and oh toya you just lit a walking stick on fire. You're gonna have to put that out Okay, they're all on fire. All right. We're just gonna walk out of this restaurant and pretend like nothing happened and it is burned down Great. Toya officially lighted a cane on the wall on fire and we're all gonna die. Sorry, South Sorry, she's like girlfriend code number six. Stop burning down restaurants. We've got this for next time guys. Thank you. Girlfriend code number seven. If Toya's near flame, please have a fire extinguisher near me.

So all the ladies leave except for Quad and Toya. They're still sitting there talking to each other. Wait, can I just say before that that heavenly says the funniest thing to Jackie? She goes, Jackie, I just want to thank you I thought this could be some BS but I was very helpful and Jackie's like well thank you now we have good girlfriend codes we can hold each other accountable to you I'm gonna take all these scrolls and rewrite them onto a longer scroll so we'll have a bigger scroll and a longer scroll everyone's like who cares we'll have only goes thank the Oh, sorry that we're gonna say yes. She goes thank the Lord and then quad Gus But I would say personal accountability to I would insist on personal accountability to they're like okay quad

Thanks, thanks for trying to get back to your town all commercial So Mariah's like this white is good. Can we take it? Oh And then you were saying by quad and yeah, so that Mariah is walking out and she's telling us she's so over the fake Phony stuff because none of the girls have even asked her the truth about cocaine and once again They're letting their letting quad slide with her slander So quad and toy are still at the table. And Toya is like, so this thing about Bariah, she is really hurt. She's really hurt.

And Quad's like, she hurt me profusely over the years. She has hurt me profusely. This sort of hurt that not even Tylenol can get rid of. Even though it is recommended by four out of five non-griggery doctors and then we see uh... mariah saying you know the accusation that mariah was saying she slept with her sister's husband didn't yet didn't mariah also accused quad of being on drugs at one point in

the show uh... probably well that's that that's the funny thing is that mariah is mad that quad said that she was on drugs which Well, that's the funny thing is that Mariah is mad that Quad said that she was on drugs, which admittedly that's a pretty bold accusation to make. But Mariah acts like it just sort of came out of the vacuum. Oh, your camera went away. Oh, I know. I was just yeah. I wanted to make sure that everything is okay. But Mariah says these things as if like it quads us them in a vacuum. When Mariah is the one who accused Quad of having a relationship with a drug dealer

and then accused Quad of having sex with her sister's husband. So it's not like, I mean, I don't even remember who said what first, it almost doesn't matter, but the point is you guys both said pretty, like made harsh accusations against each other. So like, it's not coming out of nowhere. So Toya's like, but drugs, drugs really? And she's like, I'm telling you the gods on this truth. I saw it with my own eyes profusely and profoundly.

And Torya is like, well, I'd be with her to the drug clinic. And she goes, okay. And Torya goes, they take, they take tests for five to 10 years back. And it's like cut to lease of antropome. Yeah. Well, Toya basically took, they went to like get a drug test and Toya brought a camera and they took like a whole lock of hair from Mariah's head. And apparently the testing on it said that

and there was no drugs over the past five or 10 years. And so, Toya's like, so glad. I mean, what do you say about that? And Quad just gets a very serious look on her face and she goes, it's inconclusive. She's like, like, the DA. Yeah, well, maybe that's what it was. Maybe the test came up in conclusive or something, which is never really brief. It's just inconclusive.

And she's like, inconclusive or something which is never really brief, it's just inconclusive. And she's like, inconclusive. I say one thing and I'm so awful. No one checked her on what she said about me, profusely. And Toria is like, I don't believe this at all. Okay. All those two do is trash each other's life, you know, and they've got so much dirt on each other. And it's just ugly, you know. And Toria is like, well, why can't we be cordial at least? And she's like, we are cordial and this is what she does. See someone not being cordial. Come on. I mean, Quad has a point there.

She really does. But that being said, Quad and Mariah and especially Mariah, I mean, I'm jumping out of slightly, but they complain so much that like no one has like, do they say these things and no one has my back. And it's like, no one has your back because no one wants to get involved anymore because this has been going on since season two and everyone's sick of it

and they know that the moment they have your back, they get dragged into some stupid bullshit fight about something. Yeah, hilarious. And there is turn on them for no reason and they totally deal with it and move on. Yeah, so the van homes silence for a little while. And Buffy's like, oh, this is a rumble, huh? Are we there? Van homes. I went for a little while and buffies like Huh? Are we there?

Hello Oh, I'm back. I see you what happened I don't know Sorry, I had a really a really stirring rant about I had a, sorry, I had a really, a really stirring rant about Quadim, right? But it's not worth going to. No, I heard you. It's just I talked after. Yeah, I just talked after and it was like, I wasn't even here. Well, sorry, crap is on demand. That's just how life rolls on the internet.

It certainly is. Okay. So they're writing back and toy has falling asleep with the glass of wine in her hand. And Buffy's like, I love that she can sleep like that and not drop that wine. That is hilarious. So they're all kind of laughing, you know. And they're like fun. It's nice a nice vibe in the van, I would say. And then Mariah starts her fate crying thing where she's like, let me ask you one question.

Okay. I was saying don't say anything Mariah. Don't say anything Mariah, but I have a huge issue and everyone's like oh God and having the ghost She's just kind of laughing and so then some riots like somebody Lie it on me and the group knew it. And Quaggot goes, oh, you're playing the victim.

That's what you're doing. You're playing the victim, tell it OPM. And then Mariah is like, Mariah now, that just escalates into like a fight right away. Yeah, Mariah is like, I'm talking and she's, and I'm talking as well. And she's like, I'm talking to you. Don't be a victim. I did not lie. I saw what I saw. She let me finish my statement.

You said you thought me do drugs and she and Heavenly goes, I believe her. I believe her too. Yeah. Yeah. So it was basically like, listen, you had a radic behavior and you were breaking glasses, so we go back to last year when Mariah was being a crazy face in Sicribian and like broken glass was about rage to like shank someone. So that's why I think that seemed completely on drugs.

Yes, and that too. That too. Like she's acting crazy and they're like, dude, you're on camera acting like that. So what are people supposed to think? And Mariah says, I never saw your husband do anything, okay? And Evan Lee's like, well, then why did you say you had receipts? Why did you say you had receipts? And she's like, I would never make up anything.

She did, and you can do it. So now they're all bringing these fights into one thing. Yeah, I was actually barely able to follow what was happening Especially because Mariah acting like I never said anything about your husband and then but there was the flashback of the Comment about the receipts it was just like all a mess Yeah, so that she's mad that Jackie apologized but nobody's making quad apologize to her and now heavily still say

Still mad that Mariah said that daddy cheated and never had even had receipts Yeah, and she's like you're longer my husband bitch you crazy So and then Jackie is like we just left the restaurant the girl codes are not even dry Yeah, it's like we never even wrote them. I'm like really Jackie the season seven what did you expect would happen? So Mariah's like you sit here and let this girl And contest is like oh fuck this I'm out of here Like she's gonna stop the bus. She's like this is ridiculous and then Toya tells heavenly your ghetto and

Heavenly's like your mama ghetto So having like and then and heavenly's like, your mama ghetto! So heavenly. And then Torias like, actually, I would buy a dibeddie called a baba-baba-gett. I wouldn't even mind people saying baba-baba. My baba's nickname was birds. Her high school's nickname was like, bird, like murder high, because it was called like

murder high or something like that. The school's name was murder high. They're called murder, murder high or something like that. The school's name was murder high, but they call it murder high. It gives you an idea. My mom's murder people basically. So, yeah, so, because so I was trying to like calm down heavily. So I was basically saying to heavenly,

why are you yelling? This was between Quattam Ryan, you inserted yourself into this and now you're mad. You should shut up and that's when that's when happenedly was like, and that's when they started fighting. And she's like, you'll get out, you inserted yourself into this and now you're mad, you should shut up and that's when that's when Happily was like, and that's when they started fighting and she's like, you'll get out, you'll get out. So then, so now they're just like fighting,

they're all squabbling and then they get to the Airbnb and they can't find the keys, they're out there on the stoop, just all bickering and fighting. Some of them are like mortified. I think it was like Buffy, it was like, please just let us in so we can shut these women up before we all get like thrown in jail

So then they finally get back inside and quad and Mariah stuck there just going Wabla-blah, they're bitching at each other. Well because that's by and Mariah's like okay Bye. What was she saying? Bye? She said bye perlene and then whatever that was and then quad goes let it go drugging All right, I thought she said Geraldine. I was like, oh my god That's so funny that quad said Geraldine, but then I went on to close captioning to see exactly what she said And she said let it go druggy so then

So uh so quad like goes there they'll go inside and quad quad goes up stage, she's like go on up those stairs and let's drop it. Let's drop it. You don't want it. The ghost is like, oh god, I was just about to drop a lamp, but I'm just thinking of the sleep. The host is so scared. It's actually like putting lamps on tables.

It's like, okay, just take all of them everybody. Oh, they help us. Yeah. So the upstairs and Aiden immediately calls Aiden and does her only eye-squirting sob, Mariah. And she's like, they're just gonna let us say lies about me here after you. These women hate me.

And she's like, why'd she bring that up again? She's like, I brought it up because it's over. And he's like, God damn it. He gets so mad. I don't know if he just hangs up and jumps in the car to drive down here. I would not be surprised. But I thought it was interesting, actually,

because I think that we actually may have gone to the crux of what makes Maria so crazy all these seasons. Cause she basically says, you know what, like anytime I say anything about Quad, like no one believes it, people question me, I have to have conversations, but Quad says one thing about me

and everyone just automatically believes it. So that's I think the kernel of her frustration that's probably been happening since season two is that she feels like no one ever believes it or ever gives it the benefit of the doubt. That being said, Maria has done a lot of her frustration that's probably been happening since season two, as that she feels like no one ever believes her or ever gives it the benefit of the doubt. That being said, Mariah has done a lot of things that would lead people to do that. There's usually a reason why people do that. So it's not like, oh, life is a share.

I think people believe what she says about Quad. I think people probably believe the stuff that she said that Quad does. I think that people are just like, that's not of our business. You know what I mean? So what if Quad slept with your sister's husband a long time ago, what are we supposed to fight about with quad for, you know?

Exactly. And if you did drugs one time, what are we supposed to do? Like get all of your ass about doing coke? Like it's not that huge of a deal. I understand you have kids and your, your husband's a doctor and that's a very different thing, but they're acting ridiculous. Yeah, and Mariah is basically sobbing

and saying that no one stood up for her. And that's how she feels, but the reason why no one's standing up for her is because everyone is sick of getting them off in these stupid fights. And because she keeps bringing up fights every two seconds, even after Jackie is like, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, how many times you have to say it?

I mean, she's like pulling an Eileen Davidson where it's like, okay, we're okay. And then the next party, I'm still upset. Well, now, let many times you have to say it? I mean, she's like pulling an Eileen Davidson, where it's like, okay, we're okay. And then the next party, I'm still upset. Well, now, let me tell you again, I'm really, really sorry. Okay. Well, you know, I'm still really upset about this. It's like, oh my. Well, the thing is this, you know how the women

were standing up from Araya, is that they weren't spending this season gossiping about that she might have a drug problem. They weren't talking about it, because they honestly have not really spent any time or effort talking about it, which maybe because A, they don't care, but B, maybe they also are like, we are not going to drag her through this. Like, maybe that's their way of standing up for you. And in fact, really the only one who has really been bringing it up has been you admittedly Dr. Jackie brought it up by

Sort of indirectly by asking on our podcast if it was right for a quad to say that But it was Mariah who made us think about it and the only reason why we're talking about it right now It's because Mariah made us think about it in the beginning of the season and then it was squashed and Mariah brought it back up again So if you don't want to be associated with drugs Just let it die, I'll buy it. Just talking about it. My God. So then all the girls are talking in their separate rooms

and heavenly's like, I'm right there, I for you, I'm sticking up for you. And Jackie's like, I've tried with Mariah. Like, I don't even know what else to do. I thought we were fine, and now I'm in trouble again. It's like, what the hell? And then Mariah's having a fit on the phone and Aiden hangs up and so Toya takes her for a walk and she's just going on and on and on

and Toya's like do you want to pray I mean God must be up there tonight like what the fuck is going on down there you guys I brought a make it past calling me can I get through one episode of Matlock up here for fuck's sake? I know, he's like, he's like, listen, I mean, you guys already pulled your favor for the night. Okay, I came and watched Heavenly Eat the Mac and Cheese. All right. Too late. Too late. Too late. The end.

So, that is the end of Mary Demedison, everybody. Woo-woo! So, you guys were back tomorrow with Below Deck deck med and we have a big announcement for new shows tomorrow We've got three new live shows. We're announcing tomorrow one of which is really big So we'll be announcing that so stay tuned to our show or our social media Okay, go to watch crapens.com to find the links to all our Instagram et cetera et cetera And merch and we're on cameo all that good stuff we love you guys bye everyone Hey prime members you can listen to watch our crap and add free on Amazon music download the Amazon music app today

Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or, you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey.