Watch What Crappens - Married2MedLA: Is There a Doctor in the House?

Episode Date: July 14, 2020

Married to Medicine LA wraps up its second season with a Christmas party that has everyone wondering if Jazmin's husband will ever surface? It's a question that has us on the edge of our seats. Plus, Josh Altman makes a special appearance, and Britten reclaims her bed. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders Cupi from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch what crap is Watch what crap is Who cares what happens when there's so much that crap is What happens

What Guess what happens Hello and welcome to WatcherCrapins, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to watch. I'm Ben Mandelker of the Real House where there's a kitchen island and also the Game Brain podcast. Joining me is the wonderful and hilarious Ronnie Carram from the Rose Prick's Bachelor Rose podcast. What's up, Ronnie?

Well, how's your weekend? So good. Sad to see it go. Bye weekend. Bye. Bye, Wicked. Bye, Wicked. I spent sleeping on you.

Yeah, I spent most of my weekend sleeping and really suffering from allergies, but like fully convinced the entire time I was coronavirus, like just fully convinced. So that was a real fun emotional roller coaster for me. But, you know, it's good. It makes you realize what you love, you know? Like this could be my last inch of lotta.

Yeah. That's- It's true, I did, I did call my mom. I was like, hi be my last inch allada. Yeah. That's what I need to call my mother. It's true, I did, I did call my mom. I was like, hi, just calling to say hi, but I didn't, but I didn't actually say to my mom that I was afraid that I had coronavirus because then it would be a disaster.

Yeah, well, we have very different parents. My mom would just be like, so wait, it's just, it's just like a cold. Come on out and have a drink. Just a flu. I of course then spend a lot of my time internally shaming. People I saw on Instagram, for gathering in large groups indoors without masks.

Don't do that, we're a mask. If you go to crappensmourch.com, you can get a mask. You can get a crappens mask. We have, you look great by the way, in honor of Carlito, and we also have BeMast. Don't be all like unmasked and own it baby.

All sorts of fun bravo themed masks for you to wear during these challenging times. So go to crappensmersho.com to get those. And also because it is, there are challenging times for our economy. We want to give some shout-outs to some small businesses that our listeners have. Ronnie, do you want to start us off? Well, sir, man, first we're going to start with cofertility.com.

That is their web address, cofertility.com. You can also find them at cofertility. I'm guessing on Instagram, Twitter. I don't know, give them a try, okay? This is a platform that offers answers and resources for everything fertility related, as well as provide a community for anyone trying to conceive. CoFertility strives to alleviate the stress of trying to get pregnant and de-stigmatize infertility.

So go check her out and you can find an interview she had with Sheena about her fertility journey over at cofertility.com. Awesome. Here's one from Jenna who is from Newport, Rhode Island, as recently featured on Real House House of New York. And in fact, when Jenna sent us this email, it was back when those Newport episodes were airing. So Jenna took us a little while this probably would have seen much cooler back when Newport was airing but either way so Jenna actually works at the Newport Historical Society and she is the manager and buyer for the museum shop over there and she just wants everyone to know that they have an online museum shop for anyone who is interested in

Exploring and learning about Newport history. You might find some really interesting cool gifts there So they and they've been around by the way since 1854, but they are not the Newport mansion So don't get them confused people. So the link is HTTPS, you know how URL starts. It's NewportHistory.org, NewportHistory.org, and they have some really awesome stuff, including they've got a Scrimshot Knife Kit. Whoa, and they ship everything for free, and in fact she created a promo code for our listeners,

and the promo code is Bravo. So 20% off at NewportHistory.org and get yourself some cool Newport theme stuff, maybe like a gag gift for your Roni themed party where you pretend you're going to Newport and you're gonna throw a ravioliate at your best friend at a restaurant. So that's pretty cool.

Thanks, Jenna. All right, and here we are on Married to Medicine Los Angeles Day. Wow, so this is the season finale. Married to Medicine, LA. So it's exciting. So it's exciting. Finale kind of ends the same way that the last one did.

Are we ever going to see the husband? Or are we ever going to see your husband? Wow, great mystery. Great mystery is the unknown. Who is Jasmine's husband? Why won't he appear on cameras? Is it because he is a professional? And he has clients who need to feel like he has good judgment

and that by associate, when he associates publicly with his his own wife his clients may lose faith in his very judgments perhaps perhaps his name is gatson johnson he's hot as fuck okay that's because I just had to look him up because you know who is he what what's the mystery I have I can't even believe he's on the Google. I can't believe he showed up to the Google party, sir. He's, he's just trying to like get a picture. I was just trying to like get a picture. Something is a rye with him. Well, I think he's wearing manspinks

in that second picture. Do you see the second one in images? There's like, That's something weird there. His face looks like a, I feel like he's like a deep fake. Like something is odd. You're talking about the one where it's like something weird there his face looks like a I feel like he's like a deep fake like something is odd You're talking about the one where it's like you see his torso and like Yeah, I'm gonna come around his yeah, and I don't know I think maybe she's pulling his t-shirt even tighter there to make it look flatter

She would do that, you know like try and make you look even thinner in a picture Yeah, he looks like a deep fake do you think he's not a deep fake. I'm just joking, but like he, he definitely looks like he has, he may be his best client. Just, oh, you mean the most reliable client. Something is, uh, he's a plastic surgeon, I believe. Oh, maybe not. Oh, he's a, oh, wait, he's not. I don't think he is. He's a, he's He's a plastic surgeon, I believe. Oh, maybe not. Oh, wait, he's not. I don't think he is.

He's a plastic surgeon. He's a psych doctor, I think. I think he's a psychiatrist. Okay, I don't know what I'm talking about. That's just the way I go. I think he's super cute. I'm very surprised. And then there's one of him in the ocean

with a stupid Kyle Richard's hat with his arm spread. Like, hey, look, it's me in the ocean. Look, it's just me, guys. It's just me. Why are you taking a picture?, it's me in the ocean. Look, it's just me guys, it's just me. Why are you taking a picture? It's just me in the ocean. That's definitely a better picture. That's his best look right there. But I don't know, like, there's something,

something is like a rire in his photos, and I'm not totally, I can't fully co-sign his hotness just yet. I need to get more empirical data. And maybe if he came downstairs, I would appreciate that. Well, you know, he's very tired. He has to work very early in the morning. Okay. And then there's another one I looked up his name, Gadson Johnson. So I think he's real because they have one holding a baby and nobody's that good at Photoshop. We're

just going to be holding a baby. You know, that's very difficult. That's that advanced skills that I don't think Jasmine has in Photoshop. I feel like if you're gonna spend all that effort to look good, why are you so scared of social media in photos? Maybe he's like, maybe he's like a psychiatrist who like works with, like with prisoners and things like that.

Cause I know that actually, like, you know, if you work with prisoners, et cetera, you really do have to keep your life extremely private, otherwise people might find you. And might just like talking bullshit today, I kind of feel like I'm talking bullshit. I've got coronavirus of the mouth. I don't know, I always do it.

I was like, wow, what movie did this come from? I mean, based on I was like, wow, what movie did this come from? I mean, based on... That's what kind of movie. Based on the Lifetime Movie Channel, I feel like if you work with a psych ward of a prison, okay, actually, I can base this off of an Uber passenger I once had, because as many people know, I was driving Uber, from in this podcast, saved me from Uber, But I once had a nurse who worked in a psych ward for like 20 years and she said, she was like, yeah, we always have to keep the lights dim because the lights are too bright, then the patients become overstimulated and they act up and that it out of the,

she'll show all the stories and I've got to write her letters and everything and how she really had to, like, everyone has sort of like keep their private life, private, et cetera. So I'm just gonna base, I'm gonna base everything on this guy on a fleeting conversation I had five or six years ago. Hey, it sounds good to me. This comes from a more educated place than me. So we open with Dr. Britton in a Mou Mou decorating your Christmas tree and I've just really want a Mou Mou. Why don't guys get to work?

I mean, I guess we do do to like nobody's stopping me from wearing a Mou Mou, but I can't just walk outside in the Mou Mou. I mean, I guess I should. Yeah, but guys get to walk outside in so many terrible clothing and like so many terrible choices choices and still get away with it. You know, so like, I think it's okay. I just got rid of my crocs. So in crocs and cargo shorts and oversized shirts with like, you know, the Tasmanian devil on it, like, guys really, you know, like if we,

like, we really can't complain that we, oh, no, we, why can't we have a moon moon? You know, we have so much, we have so much that we get to wear. Yeah. Well, you know, there's nobody is as discriminated against in today's society than the straight white male band. Oh, I don't know.

I don't know if you have social media, but I've heard it and it's pretty sad. So you're right. You're right. Um, so anyway, it's Christmas and this is the last episode. So everybody is required to say in every scene at least one time, God, I'm lucky to have this group of girlfriends. I know.

I'm just like, I've written, it's like, this is my first Christmas away from Florida. Thank God I have these girlfriends. So, God, I have this. It really is a sisterhood. It really is a sisterhood. No idea what Leah does for a living, but thank God is a sisterhood. It really is a sisterhood. No idea what Leah does for living, but thank God for this sisterhood. Also, I'd like to point out that while Britain decorates the tree with her kids, of course,

Mack won't help. He just stands there and just stares. This guy has like really a terrible personality, and I really hope that people acknowledge that. I love Mack. I think he's just very tired. Mack is my favorite kind of band. He's hot and exhausted. I just like him just laying there being hot.

I don't need anything from you. Everything Belieger's him. He just sits there like really, really. Like I feel like he is just beleaguered and judgy over every single thing. And he's going to complain about how to... I love Belieger to be. He just beleaguered and judgy over every single thing. And you know, he's gonna complain about how to- I'm thinking about beleaguered. He is beleaguered. And you know what, he's gonna complain about that tree.

I don't think I've ever heard that word set out loud. I've read it in books, but I think I've ever. I'm thinking about beleaguered. It sounds weird, but I say it now. But he is beleaguered. Mac is beleaguered. Because you know he's gonna to complain about that tree. He's going to be like, oh god, I hate this tree.

Then you should have helped decorate it when you had the chance, Mac. He was like, usually I just stand here and you guys do it. That's what he said in the scene. He's like, I don't usually even have to do this. I just watch you guys do it. I don't know. I I am I'm a respectful dissenter on the Mac front. That's what I have to say. I love my Mac computer. I'm not so into Mac. The husband, the the the Britain husband. Okay,

you're allowed. So then a monies over her place and she is talking to her patient who I believe we just saw a few weeks ago, right? This is the same lady with the voices in her head Yeah, who has been taking her medication and now now is in a blonde wig and like a power puff girls Like I don't know what medication she's taking but it sounds amazing and pass them over I loved I loved what that medication did for her like I don't know what you call it, self-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff-suff So then Dr. Kendra is taking Christmas pictures because she wants to be one of those families that you know send either fucking obnoxious Which I know there's some in our audience and I'm so sorry. I'm not talking about you But other people who send those fucking obnoxious Christmas photo, you know the worst thing about that my sister does that

Which of course are my nieces and I love them And I get it and stuff and they're really cute when I get them. But then my sister's like, well where's the one from a few years ago that one's really cute. What do you think I have a filing cabinet for one of your matching outfits at Christmas? I do. Okay.

I feel guilty. I don't know what to do with cards because I, like sometimes I like, I want to throw them out, but then I always feel really guilty. So I have actually been kind of, I have this like folder of cards and I'm like, sometimes I like, I want to throw them out, but then I always feel really guilty. So I have actually been kind of, I have this like folder of cards and I'm like, but it feels ridiculous to hold on to all these cards,

but then I feel like it's rude to throw them out. So I don't, I would like to know what people do with their various cards they receive from very, like birthdays. My mom just threw that shit right in the trash, like right in front of you. So big, oh, thanks. And then throw it in the trash. So that's kind of how we were raised when I became an adult. I was

like, I'm saving every card because it's so rude when she would just throw them in the trash, right? And so I would save them. And then when you're always moving somewhere, you know, I used to move all the time. And so I was moving. And I got up to, it's like memory box. I had a memory box. And there were cards in there. And I was reading the cards and I was like, how fucking pathetic is this? Someone loved me once. Feels great. I've never saved a card again. Don't even bother. Okay. That's good to know. I'll say the really good ones. So then we go over to Jasmine's house and she has this enormous tree that's like Rockefeller Plaza size. Like goes up like three stories and it's all decorated. It's all beautifully, beautifully decorated.

Like perfectly done and everything. And we see Jasmine on this ladder putting an ornament on and she's like, this is like yoga. I'm like, okay, you did not decorate this tree. You're putting one ornament on for the cameras. Don't try to bamboozle us, lady. Okay, this is like yoga. And she's like, of course, stretching extra far. Her under boob is coming out.

She's like, oh, I'm like, you know what? You're only putting one ornament on, put it on a little lower where you can reach it. I know you wanna show us your under boob right now. Okay, man. I'm really only watching the show to watch her get fat because you know it's coming one day. Nobody that obsessed doesn't get fat.

Okay, so have fun with that. Also, she's really dumb, so did you notice? They show her reaching up on her under boob and then she comes down to ladder and they show the whole tree and she's put an ornament on the wall. Like she... No, I did not notice that.

I did not. I swear to you, I swear to you there's just one moly ornament hanging from the wall like she held it into the into the upper wall develop it wall so Sunni comes over and they squill at each other a lot that Hey, why did you give me such a tired squeal? Because I'm tired, girl. Oh, oh, oh. Oh. So she's like, girl, I'm going to be having a Jasmine thing. I'm going to be having this amazing holiday party.

And I want to do an eggnog bar, but a j-nog bar, I'm going to be having a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, I'm going to be having a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, I'm going to be having a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but a j-nog bar, but called like Baynog, and you change it to J-Nog. You just fully just switched out an entire word and called it a J-Nog bar.

And by the way, fast forward to the fact that this entire party is branded with her, whatever her brand is, L-S. L-S. L-S. L-S-T. L-S-T. L-S-T.

I was at lifestyle, I was at luxury style. Whatever it is. It's like look style or something. Looks, it's like, whatever whatever the point is that there's L.S. Everywhere so then if you're gonna do something stupid with your egg nog bar shouldn't be called like an L.S. No like why the J. Jay no I think it's called Jack no

Oh Jack no Oh, that makes a little bit more sense But it does it still doesn't make sense. Jeg Dog. Jeg Dog is his best. It's just a typo. I feel it sounds like it's one of my typos. Well, it sounds like it's one of my typos.

Even when she's talking, it's like you're reading a text from somebody who's just completely fucked it up and you just have to string it all together. She is a typo of a human being. And then Soxanique looks very worried because I think all the audience was like, oh, Jasmine's making eggnog. It's gonna be just like a thin, like, bone broth with a clove in it, you know? And she's like, is it gonna be real eggnog?

She's like, yeah, yeah, will, I will. I was like, oh, of course it will. Because she has a messed up relationship with food, so she's gonna wanna watch other people eat, drink the fat and then drink while she drinks nothing Yes, like those people who watch the eating videos. Yeah, that was a house-wise plot line once when a girl had a Eating disorder she was watching all the YouTube videos of girls eating pizza That was that was Rina's daughter was talking about that and I believe and and it's fun fun fact This has nothing to do with anything, but our friend Amanda, our sweet, sweet Amanda sent me a message, an urgent message

saying that Delilah has been dating Eyal from love Island season four. And if you know love Island, I mean, I'm only like five episodes into season four, but Y'all is already like, you know, Y'all is already very Y'all, so that's some fun gossip. Oh, there you go. Y'all. Y'all. Y'all. Y'all.

It's actually Y'all. It's a big point because his name is A'all and the girl he's coupled up with, he keeps going, A'all. And he's like, no, it's A'all. You don't even know how to say my name. Yes, I do, it's like no, it's no, it's a all you don't even know how to say in my name. Yes, I do it's Grit show Um, so um, she needs because like is your husband gonna be at this party and then we get a clip

Jasmine just always ignoring or making applies for her husband Yeah, nice montage of that and uh and she and Jasmine's like, do I wish my husband could make it to this party? Absolutely. I mean, he's a busy man. He just doesn't want to be on camera. Okay, let's just let's just put it out there. He doesn't want to be on camera because there's like Robert Janiro's under his car and he can't be seen in public.

Yeah, the party is literally at your house. It's not too busy. So like walk down the stairs. So they sit on the stairs for a deep emotional, oh my God, this is totally like a sisterhood talk because it's a season finale. And Jazz is like, oh I've been hearing you talk about this real estate market

and I know that you're gonna jump into something you can already do So I got something for you. You know, I've got connections Yeah, and it's a phone number for Josh Altman. Oh, I mean who would have thought that Jasmine would be able to broker this connection Jasmine who is featured on World of Wonders, Maritime Medicine Los Angeles, could get a connection for Shanique to meet the star of World of Wonders, Million Dollar Listing Los Angeles. How did that happen? I can't believe it.

This world is so small. I'm a college she's connected. Commercials, here comes one right now. Celebrity beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the host of Wonder E's new podcast, Disantel. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the build-up, why it happened,

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We love you guys! So they showed, so she starts talking about Josh Altman and she's like, Josh is the go-to guy for luxury real estate and then we see a picture of Josh and we see a pull quote where it says Josh Altman is one of the most successful real estate agents in the Beverly Hills and Howdhills luxury housing market. But the thing is it's not like from the New York Times, it's from Josh's own website. So they put up Josh's website where of course he's both about himself and then they pull

a quote from it as if like see its proof because Josh said so Watch what crap is the best show that has a title that sounds like watch what happens With the Academy Award winner Ronnie Carrom and Bass rubber driver and cartoon draw and Oscar award winner Mr. Ben Mandelcar With special appearances from Academy Award winner Brenda Fricker Thank you But you're my daughter Josh Altman, here's the story Brenda Blethin, not Brenda Fricker

Brenda Fricker, one for my last left foot, Brenda Blethin said I'm sorry, you made a terrible mistake. Yeah. And bread the blood and said, I give home, they got one fine. It's your left one which you might have been more helpful. If it was your right one, probably I'm just saying. Yeah. Here's what's crazy about Josh ottman. That is true. That is the reason that you just said.

And I know because I like to pretend, I like to daydream a lot, you know, I'm in all day vision border. I find it very easy to like dream of things and actually doing things. So I'm always on zillow or realtor.com on the apps just scrolling through pretending I'm rich, looking at, you know, $50 million homes in LA. And he sells all of them. It's all about the Josh Altman. I believe it. I'm not saying that I believe that Josh Altman's

as a top realtor, especially since he's been on TV. I just think it's funny that the proof that the show wanted to put forward, like, whoa, look at this Josh Altman, was a pull quote from his own site. Like that's not how you legitimize something. Like, it should be from time magazines or varieties like hot realtors of 2020, something like that. I just thought it was funny that they just went

to his website or it's just him, you know. I mean, it's not even bravoTV.com. Like, come on guys. Yeah, seriously. So, Dr. Amani's house, tiny sad tree. Okay, here we are with tiny sad. I just found out I'm getting divorced tree and Adrice is She's like how are you doing Adrice and he's like well this week everything really erupted into chaos

Xboxes are being taken away. Okay. Now there's a plot line. I want to follow. Yeah. What the hell happened this week? What happened to you? What happened to you? Why aren't we taking away his Xbox like during a very tough time in his life? This is when he needs that Xbox. Well, it's not him keep his because she's like, but you're good though. Yeah. So something has gone on in the world of injuries where everybody got their Xbox is taken away. And I need to know what to do.

I bet it was a dumb challenge that people were doing like the tide pod challenge something like that Idris if you're listening to this which you probably shouldn't be but if you are I am proud of you for not engaging and whatever We think happened because you got to keep your Xbox clearly. So thank you. You're a good kid. So Paula my favorite comes over. Hello. How are you? Merry Christmas. I brought the holiday spirit with me. I just love. She's just so cool.

At the holidays, this is a time when we reflect on the things that we have done. Merry Christmas to all. And to all good night. And I'm on his like, yeah, growing up Christmas was a big deal, but Santa class scared me. I was like, who's this white man coming down my chimney? Yeah, we're all sleeping. So Paul is like Idris. Did you give your mom your list for Christmas?

Has he been naughty or nice? I would love somebody. And she's like, how was your trip? Why don't you tell me about your trip to Palm Springs? And Amani's like, well, the first night we did a gift exchange. And she's like, oh, so she tells you the story about the penis or whatever. And the mom's like, wow, not only did I never have this conversation with my mother, I could never and my son. I wore my grandson. Yeah, oh yeah,

yeah, her son. Yeah. So she's like, so what's happening with Phil? And so they started talking about how they been packing up Phil's stuff and someone's going to take it. It's her and Eidrys is just like sitting there listening to it all and so Paul's like, Eidrys, you've been listening intently to us how you feel. So he's so cute. He's like, he's like, it's a lot of emotions and I just like, like, what? It's like, well, normally this wouldn't happen. You know, like, they're gone and you have to process it on your own. You know, because he's saying that like, normally that parents leave and then the kids start having to deal with it.

But, you know, but it's not, he's happy because he has, you know, his mom and his grandma to talk about it, talk him through it and everything, which is so sweet. I mean, it's so, you know, I feel so bad for this kid, you know, or any kid who has to go through this, it's probably so hard, but he seems like at this stage, he has a good handle on it, like, oh, well, I'm so proud of you. You survived without me with the baby. Wow. So by the way, I took that job, signed the contract. What the hell? Yeah.

I get like deciding, OK, I'm going to do this, whether you want me to or not. But I can't you say, hey, I've decided I'm going to side that contract. I went to Palm Springs, then I came back, and the morning I got back, I side it. say, hey, I've decided I'm gonna side that contract, you know, like, yeah. I went to Palm Springs, then I came back and the morning I got back, I sighed it. Sorry, second. I know. I thought that the whole thing in Palm Springs was they were like, uh, you have to like, loop your husband in on these big life decisions, you know, and she's like,

uh-huh. And then she's like, by the way, I, uh, I signed that contract and, uh, it's actually gonna be in the different countries. So I'll, I'll see you never. Bye. Yeah, she didn't listen to that advice, but he takes it really well. He's like, well, you know, I'm proud of you. So you do, you know, you do you and that's going to help you be a better mother here at home. And she's like, hey, and so that ended up really well. So then Shaniq goes to lunch at a place on Robertson.

And Josh Hoffman shows up, and of course, he's wearing all black. He's looking as like expensive, but skeezy as possible, just like black blazer, black tie, black shirt, and all that stuff. And so Shiniik is like, hey, anyway, where do you some check-knog? I'm sure Jazz expressed why we're meeting. He's like, not really, actually, I have actually no idea what I'm doing. I don't even know who Jazzman is to be fair.

Is she work at World of Wonders? Is she the production assistant over there? I don't even know. Why don't I know why I'm here? She's someone with a big house. Okay, well, that's important enough for me. All right, what do you need? What do you need from here?

Yeah, so she's like, well, I'm looking again at a real estate and I've been working in property management and she's like, Well, I'm looking again at a real estate, and I've been working in property management, and everything's like, well, you know that, property management has nothing to do with real estate, right? I'm rich, I don't even know your name. Who are you? Are you the waitress? Should you be sitting at this table with me?

Is that a little off the protocol? What's going on here? It's like, you have a license, and she's like, for seven years, and she's like, oh, God, seven years, and you've never sold real estate, listen, there's thousands of real estate people thousands trying to climb up to the top And the people on the top that show them up and the splitting them out because you go against me kid You're gonna lose you're gonna lose kid. Yeah down crazy pants. Yeah, just Yeah, he's like listen Lizzo, this is what you got to do.

You got to find a team, find a micro market, you got to know every house and that market. I don't try to know everything from Malibu to Malibu to Pasadena. Like the music was like, is this what's qualifying? It was like a moment right now. You can't just do Malibu to downtown. Oh, gotta leave soon, I gotta be in La Jolla.

So show my next house. Yeah, exactly. Exactly, gotta be in the woods. He's like the one type of people, the one type I can tell you, there's one type of person that fails. The one that thinks they can do it as a part-time job. And she's like,

um, that's me. it is a part-time job and she's like, um, that's me. She's like, I know I do PowerPoint and she's like, but the good news is my husband's a doctor and he knows a lot of other doctors, so I could help them. He's like, oh, that's a great idea. That's a great idea. At that point, Josh was like, this woman is a lost case

and she will never make any impact. So I'm just gonna support her strange little dreams and get my free coffee and leave. Yeah, he's like like the attitude kid. Yeah. So next up, Written and her kid had the discussion of you can't sleep in mommy's bed anymore. Yeah, they're finally kicking my knee out of the bed and so. I think she calls her daughter, Humty.

Did you catch that? I did not catch that. The kids like the toothpaste tastes bad and she said it changes with your mood, huh? I'm sorry. I was one of the kids named Hunter. No, there's one named Miney and what's the other one's named? Unfortunately, I did not commit their names to memory. Despite that super fascinating scene that took place in a color of me mine a few weeks ago. So all I know is that Mione likes to stay in the bed. And so Mione is finally getting kicked out, and Mack is very excited.

And there's a lot of scenes that like Manny, like running back into the bed, and running back to his bedroom, and just being like sort of like a little imp, sort of like the way I was until I was about, you know, 14. And so, just the kids going back and forth, and finally, finally the kids like in his room, and Britain and Mac are in their bed, talking about how like, you know, this is good,

because Manny really needs to grow up a bit, and they cut to Manny in his little bed, and and like the lights are off and he's just sitting in the bed and it's like one of those Sarah McLaughlin, you know, adopt this like sad dog commercials that's on late at night. I was like, in the arms of the angel. It's like poor mining. he was, I was like, why? And he was just so scared. He's just so sad on the sister's stop bunk. He's terrified. So then Leah is at the store and Kendra comes by and tries to show us some gigantic earrings. And then they talk about, guess what?

This is the only plot today. Today's show. Hey, are they going gonna meet Dr. J? Dr. J. They're wondering if he's gonna be there, I mean, cause obviously it's a holiday party. That's at his house. I mean, how do you not appear at your own holiday party?

You know, it maybe is not even real. I was more distracted by the woman who working at the store who was wearing some sort of like strange orange brown, like it was like a little top, big polka dot is an orange brown top with like a big white dots and she was wearing it over like a top, like little spaghetti straps, but she was wearing it over like a black turtleneck.

It was so strange. So they're just trying to figure out who this guy is. Nobody knows, okay, but I hope we get another season about it. Yeah, I'd be great. We can't wait to find out. Yeah. So then back at Britain's, she and Mac wake up and they're like, wow, we actually held hands and fell asleep together. Yeah. Like happy for you, don't care. Okay, so next Amani's house, she's, it's like a beginning of the episode thing. Like, what are they doing at their house? what are they doing at their house?

What are they doing at their house? So, Monty's just getting a Dreece taking care of her babies to get ready for this holiday. She calls Paula. She calls Paula. She's like, so do you want me to drop a Dreece over there? You guys want to get him? Paula's like, you can bring him, please.

It's like I have to try. I'm just imagining what it must be like for a Dries to be like. It's like you get spend the night at grandma's house. I just imagine going to Paula's house and like it's like, there's just like a clock like. And just like just like giant bookcases and like maybe a fireplace. Is there a Dries sitting on a brown leather couch like, okay? Would you like to do a puzzle?

It's called you. We were just thinking about sitting down and listening to some Bivaldi all four seasons. Is that intrigue? Idris? So we go over to the mansion and Jasmine's holiday party is she's running around going, go do this, do that. Oh my gosh, did anybody get that word of men off the wall? Sorry, that was a mistake. And Jasmine's like, I'm an expert in throwing big, extravagant parties.

Well, no, you're an expert in hiring a party planner and then bossing the party planner around. It's a big difference. She has a step-and-repeat of her business after a holiday party. It's tacky. And also, congratulations, you opened up a business. Maybe let's work on that logo. It doesn't have to be just something that you mocked up on Microsoft Word, like maybe

a higher-agraphic designer, because that logo is shit. It is a terrible logo. it doesn't have to be just something that you mocked up on Microsoft Word, like maybe higher graphic designer because that logo is shit, it is a terrible logo, it is so terrible. I just stepped and repeated your own business. Why, who does that? Who does that? Yeah, well, the ice-loos was also branded, the ice-loos also said LS.

We just shined in the LS, that wide why it's turning I can't stand it. I love you're going after her curting it's terrible. It's terrible. It's bleakering me. And I just like this scene because I knew Kyle Richards was at home being super furious that somebody had my sculpture.

And then you know, we get a we get clips on all these extravagant parties that Jasmine likes to have. And she does us Marilyn Monroe thing the way she talks and it's a diary room session. It's girls too much. And she seems very sad. She seems very sad and really, you know, I have to say also this house. I've always hated this house, but really this episode we've spent a lot of time in it. And this is a this is a terrible house.

I'm sorry, it is so tacky, it's so tacky on the outside, and you come in, and okay, it's got let's cool open atrium and everything. But you can, it actually, for as big as it looks on the outside, I have to say it films very small. Like it actually feels small on the inside, and then when they go out in the back, the pool is essentially like a plus size hot tub is like a tiny little pool up against like a cliff

So there's like no backyard and this tacky house It everything and a bad step-and-repeat. It's all a failure for me What really gets me is to valve it on the walls come on, because the second that anybody walks into your home, the first thing they do, we do, because of course I would too, is you walk in there and you touch the fucking valve at wall, of course you do, and you don't know what those people were eating in their car, if there anything like me, it starts with when and it ends with these, okay?

Someone was eating some Wendy shit in their car, and they just wiped it all over your walls, and it's your own fault. Yeah, I agree. I think everything is wrong with this house and it's funny because Jasmine is like, she hired a security so that we know it can go upstairs and she, because, and partially because she was really pissed last year that she got so many disparaging remarks about her house. Well, I'm like, well, guess what? You have a terrible house and you know

what? Those remarks were nothing compared to how the rest of us all feel about it. Because Dr. Monty is right, it is like a drug-jewelder's house. But she was joking, and the fact that you couldn't see that was a joke is ridiculous. But I'm not joking, it's a terrible house. Well, I just like it because it's very big, and I'm very tacky like that. Like, wow, a big house, I love it.

It looks like something that like Carmella Carmella soprano would like want to buy Napkins on the wall my kind of house because you know I got sludge marks all over my walls, you know, it looks like somebody died They were bleeding oil So I'm like wow that's such a good idea like some Viva paper towels on the wall She has a security guard come to guard it, but you didn't guard it from like, what did you just find the choir that asks the least questions? Like, to your Craigslist, I need a choir to come to perform at my house, but you are not

allowed to ask any questions of anybody you see in the house, because they were upstairs. I think that basically the security guard was there to make sure no one went upstairs and saw the choir. Right, that's what I think in retrospect. And although it's sort of funny that there's a whole choir up there, you couldn't even hear them, that they had to sit there quietly for like three hours. Yeah, it was like a Yolanda Foster situation where she kept the five the five tenors down on the basement. Yeah. Ladies and gentlemen, Andrea Bocelli. It's like, no, it's just it's three tenors down there. Yeah, I think she got the security guard to keep the girls out. And of course, they needed them.

They needed that security guard because, of course, they did try to go up there. Yes. So then we get... Oh, this is my other favorite thing about her, Jasmine. She's really dumb and so she tries to look smart by half closing one of her eyes and raising her eyebrow. You know that look? Like, thinking of like a cartoon character.

I'm thinking very deeply. She makes that when she's trying to be serious and I think it's so cute. Maybe her blood sugar is low. She better check it. So Shani can robber her driving to the party and drive them by all these holiday lights. And he's saying how he wants to move to an area with like a lot of where everyone has their holiday lights up and then he wants to be at the one house that doesn't have them on.

And Shani gets like, stop that. So then she's like telling him about meeting with Josh and basically like Josh's big advice was that she's gonna have to work hard. Who do thought that's great advice? Yeah, so then we let's see some people start arriving and there's like a whole line of models watching Alliance models LS on the uns models LS on beyond models. L.S. Ampios. L.S. Ampios. That's the walk-in-lot step in the same outfits, really weird. Yeah, they are all just like, she's basically hired a bunch of models to sort of fill out her party, which is also, that's something that happens a lot in Los Angeles, but for some reason it just felt even more ridiculous here. And so, yeah, so this party's starting.

And so, Leon Kendra, the first to arrive. And they're like, oh my god, this house is gorgeous. It's gorgeous. And Leon's like, there's velvet on the walls, but it's been done in taste. It's done in taste. I was like, really? I'm not sure about that.

But. And they see the security guy and they're like, really? So then Britain arrives, wearing to reek clips. Yep. Big old to reek clips. Britain looks like she's already ready to go to sleep. I think we discussed this last week or maybe two weeks ago.

How Britain very often has that look of someone who's like trying to stay awake and listen to you or like she bit. Britain has the look, I think of every mom who is trying to watch what's on TV, but is falling asleep while she does it. And then you try to change the channel. No, no, I'm watching that. I'm watching that. It's like, mom, you're's falling asleep while she does it. And then you try to change the channel. No, no, I'm watching that.

I'm watching that. I was like, mom, you're falling asleep. I'm watching it. And it's like, with somebody, and you've had a really good time, you've been laughing, and then they start getting tired. And then they, everything you say, they're just kind of squinting at you like, just squinted not. Disgusted.

It's like the things. You're like, why do you hate me now? We were just having so much fun. Why do you hate me now? I know, like, we were just having so much fun. Why do you hate me now? I remember once we went to a bowling alley and a girl started doing that. I'm like, how are you like falling asleep at a bowling alley, right? We're like active. We're standing up and rolling bowls down an alley. Why are you giving me like the mom- mom watching Jeopardy face?

Why are you doing that? So, Leah's walking around the party like, oh God, well, that's strange. I mean, it's strange she has arm security. It's. You have a party at your house and you're not here I mean where are you at your own party? Where are you? This is all straight. That's a lot of straight. Who cares? Just eat the free food Seriously another thing about the LS logo by the way is that It's basically a rip off of the SLS logo. Did you notice that she just took off one of the S's and just made it LS Mm-hmm. What's that LS like the SLS logo. Did you notice that? She just took off one of the S's and just made it LS. What's the SLS?

Like the SLS hotel? No. Most it's a looking to. I don't know. Well, there's that too. She made it look like a holly she took the she you know what she did? She took the little the little rays off the holiday in logo and just a circle. That's what she did. Oh, so Jazz is upstairs getting makeup on her boobs and Monty comes in and she's all in the bad mood, you know?

Because she's money. Yeah. She's like, I'll take a dirty botty, that's what I wanted dirty botty, and she's like, oh, lighten up. Policeman. She's fantastic, though. Of course, and Policeman clearly said something

to her when she dropped off each reason. She's like, have fun at your party being irresponsible as always. So everybody comes and squeals at her and the now turn. She's like, it's hard to be seagulled during the holiday season, but we'll see who was recovered to my life after that. Because even if Brad Pitt came up today and say say chill, Brad Pitt, you know, chill, but thank God this is like a sisterhood.

I know. Thank God for the sisterhood. The sisterhood where we don't really know one of the sisters husbands, but it's a sisterhood. We sure everything. So then Jasmine finally comes downstairs and she's basically wearing like a tennis tennis skirt. It is like, she is, I mean, I mean, it is, listen, I'm not slutshaming or anything like that, but I just think it was like very funny that she spent all that time to get ready for basically just putting on a bathing suit with like some fringe. Yeah, she comes bopping down the stairs. She's like, we have entertainment.

And this is one of those people who tries to just do everything at their party instead of just like having a good time. It's like she has a lady in a blow up ball, you know, in a tiny pooling, in a tiny pool. So it doesn't, it doesn't have like a dramatic effect. It's one thing we have like that big pool and you see someone in a ball and it's like, whoa, but this is like a tiny pool with a ball in it and a lady dress like Santa Mrs. Claus I

Don't think the ladies done a lot of bubble work Just say that Bubble bubble if you will see like the little new to the job She looked new to so many things gravity. I don't know. She was and she came with like her mom That was my favorite part like her mom Pam was like to the side I'd be like okay, okay, okay Lindsay getting that ball. I'm gonna just like rolling you right into that water. There you go Pam and Lindsay Gosh, she was just like on her knees just like yeah, it was really bad. She looked like she was fixing a sink

I think she looks like she just dropped her puzzle pieces on the right She was looking for a contact in that ball She's kind of sitting there like oh am I done picking up pieces yet? But you know there's one under the carpet somewhere, you know, yeah, she's looked horrified Okay, so then Lee is like I I'm gonna get in the ball. I was like, this is so wacky. And she gets in the ball and they start rolling her in and then Jasmine comes up and like pushes the ball in the pool and she falls back in the ball and hits her head on the back of the pool. And then she fills around for a while and then she's kind of mad

that Jasmine, when she finds out it was Jasmine, he did it, she gets mad. Yeah, well, it is, it was kind of scary. I mean, it was like her head like hit that, and that's dangerous. That was really scary. I was, I was actually like very anxious about all of that. It gave me memories of when Taylor Armstrong's gay pushed Ken Todd into the pool. And I'm like, he is old, that's dangerous.

Oh, yeah. I'm like such a, I'm like such a school marm on these shows. I'm like he is old that's dangerous. I'm like such a schoolmarmony shows. I'm like don't do that. Where are longer ads? Don't push people. Fix your kerning. So let's see. She now, Monty's talking about being vulnerable. Yeah, well, Monty's talking about she's saying she's like thanking the girls for being there for her for the past few months And Britney again is doing the like no, I'm listening. I'm not falling asleep. I'm listening. I'm just gonna smile and Not and squint at you. I'm totally listening and they're like let's get a money later She will get laid be because I think that she is She is going to when she is like ready

She is going to have an amazing dating life Well, or like like being that like she She is like a prize and I think that she is going to have the she should have The crem de la crem de choose from that's what I'm trying to say I'm trying to empower her okay everyone just I won't come down so Leah falls in the pool and then guess what Jasmine has another surprise you guys okay it's for Ryan Kerry whoa I don't even know what the point of this was was what it was supposed to trick people is it supposed to be entertaining that it's a Mariah Carey imitation it was so bizarre so basically

um Mariah Carey impersonator shows up and on the chirona just says not Mariah Carey in all caps and it's not like it would have made sense that this woman did like a performance or lip sync which maybe it was there and got edited out. But like as far as we can tell, she just sort of like walked up and was like, hi, I'm a Ray Carey. And everyone was like, okay. And everyone was like, that's not Mario. That's not even close to Mariah.

Yeah, it was weird. She just like stopped on Hollywood Boulevard and just like picked up somebody, you know. Yeah, so then, um, and then she just leaves. Yeah. So then Britain and Shanique meet up in the kitchen with their husbands and talk about how much their advice has helped each other and how they're a sisterhood.

Yeah. They're a sisterhood and then Robert shows them. They're talking about how now that mine is out of the bed, they can start getting their freak on and how then Robert shows us a paddle. He likes to hit Shanique with and everything else like I'm bored. I'm bored. I'm as bored as Mac right now, because Mac looks really bored. And we haven't even talked about his best, but he gets a pass because it's a Christmas party. Well, he gets a pass because also Hobart comes in and some weird fucking racing jacket.

I think he came off of his shift. I'm gonna give him that. Um, so anyway, um, the guy, let's see, the guy. Hobart, Hobart shows up and he's like, he's like, whoa, this is a nice place. I mean, I've heard about Beverly Hills as a little boy, but I've never actually seen anything like this. I'm like, Hobart, you've been living in Baldwin Hills. If you're not taking the 20-minute drive over to Beverly Hills, come on, Hobart, you've been living in Baldwin Hills. Have you not taken the 20-minute drive over to Beverly Hills? Come on, Hobart. So Kendra is talking to the girls and she's like, come on, Dr. J's right upstairs. And then we see a clip of Jasmine going,

he's upstairs, but he's asleep. He's very, very busy. And they're like, why the hell? Monty's like, that bad does not what a fuck with us. Let me tell you that, like, that bad does not what a fuck with us. Let me tell you that, Matt. That bad does not what a fuck with us. And Leah's like, sir, do you secure the house? What exactly are you doing here?

He's like, oh, secure the house. And Monty's like, is he Norman Bates? Is he like with the corpse, dressed like his dead mom? Like, what's going on up there? Yeah, and Ken just trying, they're trying to get by by him and she's like, can I take a picture just from that balcony? Just from that balcony? He's like, no, no, no. And then Jasmine's sister comes over and is like, no, no, you have to leave. You can't go up there. So they all get shoot away. And they're like, oh, okay. All right. I'm about to for that plot line. That huge plot line. That huge plot line.

Well, there's a little button that they go outside and they start calling out to Dr. J from outside. Like, didn't they make it look on the previews? Like, he actually came out on the balcony. Or they made it look like a shadow was moving in the room or something like he was going to come out and get pissed off. They did. Unfortunately, it never happened because he was doing something, I guess.

I don't know. Well, I guess we'll have to wait for season three for this long running. This is sort of like, we'll be ever going to see Maris on, Maris on, on Frazier, no. No. He's basically the Maris, is a Maris or Marist. I think it's Maris. He's basically the Maris of Frazier So that's that's a nice feather he can put in his cap when he when people talk about him and He'd be people like hey isn't your wife on that show and bravo. He's like yeah, I'm the Maris I'm the Maris of the show. Yeah So then Jasmine introduces the choir the the singers of souls, so they come out and start singing and guess what Britain's thinking about you guys is gonna be shocking to everybody. Sisterhood.

Sisterhood. And a money, by the way. She's like, you know what, I'm feeling lighter and freer. And you know, this really helps cement this group as a bunch of sisters. Sisters were sisters. I love that she thinks sisterhood makes her feel better. You just had a martini, okay? That's what made your sisterhood with gray goose, okay? Seriously. And Kendra's like, you know,

how many mothers can you talk to her also physicians? Like, you know what? Sounds like you found yourself a sisterhood. know how many mothers can you talk to her also physicians? Like, you know what? Sounds like you found yourself a sisterhood. Wait, hold on. There's one more. Jasmine. She's like, you know, it's not common to be in a friend group that's so powerful and motivational. I'm helping moving forward. We can continue to uplift each other like sisters and sisters. And that was the end to a... Well the last thing, the wire is singing and then the music on the TV show starts playing like it tries to accompany the choir and it's off for a solid two minutes.

It can never... It can never get in rhythm with the choir. And I think that pretty much sums it up. That sums up so much. And that concludes a very, very dramatic and interesting season of marriage and medicine, Los Angeles. Oh, wow.

Yeah, we'll always remember this season. God, I'm never gonna forget it. Well, thank Jesus, real housewives of Potomac comes back in a couple of weeks. That is what I'm here for. I know. I know. I'm going to one day. We will be back still in the Monday slot, but we will have the Shaws of Sunset reunion

for the next two Mondays and then after that is Potomac. I'm so excited. I'm actually very excited for the Shaws reunions because I am like really ready to see Reza eat some shit, which you probably probably won't do but I'm hoping it will happen. Oh he always gets out of everything. He will. Yeah he will for sure. It'll be fun talking like him for a little while. I know it'll be fun or talking like Mike. Raza like what are you doing right now Mike? I'm gonna write Raza right now. This is crazy. This is crazy what you said. Well we will be back tomorrow as usual on every day

this week. Thanks so much for being with us, you guys. Go get your masks. Let's pour you small businesses, set for it, set for a kite. Talk to you later. Bye. Bye. Hey, prime members. You can listen to WatcherCrapins' ad free on Amazon Music.

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