Watch What Crappens - OC Finale, Drunk Ramona, and Jersey Feuds

Episode Date: June 28, 2012

OC Finale, Drunk Ramona, and Jersey FeudsSee acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

From Wondery and Audible comes Class of 88, a new podcast hosted by Will Smith. Before 1988, a lot of people didn't take hip-hop seriously. But hip-hop today touches everything from film to fashion to sports. So what changed? Follow Class of 88 wherever you get your podcasts. Ladies and gentlemen, this is the Countess speaking. We have arrived. Hey everybody, welcome to Watch What Crap Ends, a podcast dedicated to all things Bravo. My name is Matt Whitfield from Yahoo TV. And joining me today are my trusty sidekicks who are always ready to dish all the dirt.

Say hello, boys. Hi. Hi, everybody. For those of you who don't know, that is Ben Mandelker and Ronnie Karam. And today we are going to be talking about The Real Housewives of Orange County. We had an explosive season finale along with The Real Housewives of Orange County. We had an explosive season finale along with the Real Housewives of New York City

and the Real Housewives of New Jersey. And for all of you fans out there and listeners, we have so much to talk about, Housewives related this week. If we don't get to anything that you want us to discuss, please feel free to tweet us at what... What is it? I fucked that up.

It's what crappens. Can you edit that? It's okay. You're allowed to. Now it's not getting edited. You have to edit that. Now I feel like a dork. No, no.

You're not a dork. It's okay. You're allowed to have a little stumble on a podcast. Pat Sajak would be so ashamed of me. He would be so drunk right now that he wouldn't even know that he did. Anywho, well, let's start off with some gossip before we go into the OC finale because I know we have a lot to discuss. I have a huge amount of gossip, okay? And all my gossip comes from people who work on production.

It does not come from the internet, okay? Wait, so this is insidery. This is insidery. Okay, the first piece of gossip has nothing to do with the housewives. It's just a small item, which is that Around the World in 80 Plates is supposed to be coming back for a second season. So there's that. Pause. That is a big piece of shit, and nobody is watching it.

The ratings are in the toilet, and the show kind of just – I'm sorry. Cat Cora is not a TV star. Well, I think they're going to tweak it. I think they're going to tweak it, and they should because it's just – it's not working. And I love traveling shows. You know what they need to do to tweak any show on Bravo? And I know you're going to agree with me. More Gail Simmons.

Oh, yeah. Do we know if Top Chef Just chef uh just desserts is coming back yeah it's supposed to come back in the fall probably i mean it never got canceled and the ratings the ratings were fine last season thank god i was a little scared i was actually thinking about that last night i was like you know what if top chef just desserts doesn't come back i might cry seriously yeah that'll be back i wonder when real housewives of miami is coming back because i see those bitches tweeting all over the place. I'm sure that's going to be on soon.

You know, they keep tweeting and then it's like the show has been off the air for well over a year. I don't really think it's going to happen. I just don't. Oh, they're taping it. No, I know they're taping, but I don't know that the tape is ever going to see the light of day. Well, I think it is because they've published – well, they've published published a lot of stories i mean there's been a lot of gossip stories about how trashy it is this year so sounds like i'm open for it i i i enjoyed that horrific reunion that they had um and you know i don't know did you guys watch the bravo's top 20 reunion special moments

it was fabulous it was but i have to talk about one thing real quickly. And I'm getting into this reunion thing because I just mentioned the Miami thing. Andy Cohen put in a clip around 15 or 14. It was like a clip from the first season of New Jersey Reunion where he was like, what a crazy moment when I outed myself on TV. I'm like, first of all, everyone knew you were gay. Second of all, this clip is so unremarkable. And third of all, this is just basically feeding your ego right now. You think that everyone

who saw that reunion was like, oh my god, remember that moment when Andy Cohen admitted that he was gay? No one cared. That guy came out of the womb sucking his own dick. Give me a break. If you guys keep talking more shit about Andy Cohen on this podcast, how am i ever gonna win that thing to get behind the bar on watch what happens because i applied i applied

let me tell you you'll get in but let me tell you something andy cohen the placenta looked like a rainbow okay he's been super good for a long time okay no offense to you andy khan but like that was ky that moment did not deserve. If the two of you applied to get behind the bar on his show, you just got eliminated. I'm sorry. Oh, he's got a good sense of humor, though. He's funny. I'm sure he's chuckling along.

We're just saying that he's gay. Big deal. We're saying that he's super gay and that everyone knew. Okay, that's all we're saying. Okay, so do you want to hear some more gossip? Yes, clearly. I'm going to hear the insidery stuff. Okay, now this is all my gossip has to do with the real housewives of orange county which is convenient because that's the next thing we're going to talk about yay um first thing oh actually this is one item that did not come from production this is an item that was like by the

way you sound like kathy griffin when you go on your tangents and like where the hell are we going with this? Reel it in. Reel it in. I don't know. I thought there was a rule in improv that you don't be nasty to people, okay? Really? I would never do improv if that was the truth. Here's an item that we never talked about, but I think

we should have, which is that Alexis had to go to the hospital recently to get stitches. Did you guys hear about this? Because she sat on a wine glass. Who? Alexis Bellino sat on a wine glass and had to get stitches. Well, you know that she never goes to get surgery for the real thing, so she's probably got butt rejuvenation or something for dinner. Yeah, exactly.

Who sits on a wine glass, though? I mean, I guess she does. I mean, look, everybody has their fetish. I don't judge you probably have a water closet yeah i do with wine glasses that i sit on um okay so now here's that here's what i learned from production everyone on the production of real houses of orange county apparently refer to jim bellino as the chin which i which i appreciate i like that everyone calls him that okay um the other thing i learned is that Gretchen and Slade are apparently a lot more rocky than we are seeing on TV.

And that their relationship is actually not in a good place. Well, don't you think that has something to do with the fact that Bravo is clearly pushing her to dump his ass? Probably. I mean, at the end of the day, she's going to pick the show and fame and Gretchen Christine Butte over Slade. I mean, that's just the way it is. Well, and then the other thing is that, I mean, she does want to get married, but she's not going to take on his debt. So that's probably like a true stress. I really would like to see that play out in the next season because, look, she's a moron, don't get me wrong.

But I do think it would be fun to see her date somebody her own age, not a dying grandpa or a dirty slade. Yes, that's true. Although now that he's a radio DJ, that kind of makes him sexy, right? He's a 92.3, a remote venturer. Oh, no. Is that a radio DJ? No. That's all male wigs.

That's terrible. Yeah, and let's talk about a medium that's doing really, really well right now. Guys, he's on a Ventura radio station. He's on a Ventura radio station. Terrestrial radio. He's on a Ventura radio station. That's so impressive. Well, can I give you some gossip that is completely unproven? It's TVGasm comment thread gossip. Sure.

Someone on there said that that whole fight with Alexis in wherever they were. Costa Rica. Cabo. Costa Rica. Costa Rica, which as we all know is a city in Mexico. were. Costa Rica. Cabo. Costa Rica. Which as we all know is a city in Mexico. In Mexico, yeah. So that whole fight that they got into Alexis where they were telling her off about being pretentious, that was actually telling

Alexis off for being pretentious and mean to the people backstage. Like apparently she's very cruel and talks down to everybody who works on the show and that's why everybody was jumping on it and saying you you know you sound like an asshole okay well guess what that changes everything because in the past in the past few weeks i've actually been a little dare i say team alexis because i don't like them ganging up on her

but if she's being a bitch to the pas and the cameramen and the boom dudes i want them to give her hell maybe that's why she's no longer with fox 5 san diego maybe she was just too much of a terror for dr booty yes bimbo terrorist um the other piece of gossip that i have is that uh also the people on production they i think they believe that brooks is a crook as well uh because they say the rumor is that he not only is like someone who's leeching off of vicky but he's actually uh he actually went back and studied old episodes and has like studied her and like apparently the things that like if you go back on old episodes he's at he's totally playing her like a fiddle which we sort of already knew but he he literally is saying things verbatim of what she wants to hear.

And he's doing that because he studied her. Is that kind of like how Vicky would say probably in past seasons? Like, I just want Don to stand up for me. And then he'll whisper into her ear like, well, I always stand up for my lady. Yeah, that's actually exactly what it is. Gross. You know what? He is such a great, I mean, it is so obvious.

And the fact that Vicky is willing to, like, fuck up her relationship with her children for him is crazy. But anyway, at that, I mean, are we done with the gossip? Should we just move right into this finale? Yeah, that's out of control. That's all the gossip that I had. Okay, let me just start with a question. Now, does anybody throw a finale better than Orange County? Those parties are always ridiculous. a finale better than Orange County. Those parties are always ridiculous. They are, those bitches know to bring their A game on those final episodes.

I mean, they really, Tamara, especially, you know, she, I mean, she is a cold hearted wench who is very, who has at times can be one of the most vile people on the planet,

but she really knows how to bring the entertainment. I, you know, I have to give her respect because as a seasoned veteran at this point, these women go into the finales in Orange County going, if there is any doubt in anybody's mind about me

coming back for the next season, let me solidify my spot in that cast. Oh, yeah. Tamara Barney is a horrible, horrible human being and I loved how at the beginning of this season she was playing it all nice. Like, oh, I'm going to be nice to Gretchen. I'm going to be nice to everybody because I'm a different person now.

And I've really changed and blah, blah, blah, blah. And I said way back then, of course the C word is going to come rolling back out. She cannot help it. And you get a couple of drinks into her. Yeah. And her eyes just turn into little slits, and she gets those mean, thin lips. Her hair gets extra white trashy.

She just gets vile. Oh, yeah. She just gets vile. That whole fight with Brooks, oh, my God. That was just sick. Do we think that Tamara truly gave Vicky the evil eye, or was she just rolling her eyes at the mere mention of Alexis? Because it could have been that, too. She's rolling her eyes at Vicky the evil eye or was she just rolling her eyes at the mere mention of Alexis because it could have been that too look I think she's rolling her eyes

at Vicky and Brooks I think she was giving the evil eye to Brooks because when she gets like that she'll fight about if the mailman brought her mail she'd be like you son of a bitch bringing flat things to me who do you think you are you calling me

flat chested because I got my boobs taken out you son of a bitch? Oh, Tammy Sue. There's also an implication that if she's given the evil eye that she has eyes that are not necessarily evil. And I'm sorry. I think she always has evil eyes. They're red and they got little flames in them. They're scary.

They do. Well, this is the second season that that evil eye has come back because last year was the fight about the evil eye baseball cap. How hilarious was that that they then cut to Gretchen in a confessional going like, the evil eye symbol just really sets her off. Those are fighting words. Yeah,

well, she was being ridiculous and Vicky and her were giving each other dirty looks all night long and Vicky was yelling at her from across the party when she was being nice to Gretchen. Oh, come on, Tamara! Really? Really, Tamara? And by the way,

Vicky had this novel idea to go up to Tamara, and she was going to try to put some brown feces on her nose or something. And it's like, you know what? If Tamara had tried to do that to Vicky, Vicky would have flipped her shit, you know? And Brooks probably would have said something. Would have had a lot of opinions about it, I'm sure. Brooks, by the way, I don't think – it was not his place to – he started up with Tamara.

He really did. I mean he wasn't just like – he didn't just tell her to stop. He was like, oh, you want to go there? All of a sudden this guy grew a pair of balls. Maybe because Vicky bought the car. Well, it's also because Vicky is bitching about Tamara all year long and saying all this stuff like, oh, Tamara's being so mean to me, this and that. So he's ready to go. He's ready to jump.

And also he has to solidify his next season too. Yeah, he does. He definitely – he needs to get – I liked how Brooks was just like drunk in the middle of the party asking for Jim Bellino. What was that about? He was like, oh, where's Jim? I really like that Jim Bellino. Is Jim Bellino coming by? I mean was he drunk or is that that his new $15,000 teeth?

Maybe he's still a little high from the Novocaine or something. Well, Jim Bellino is probably the only one more hated than he is at the moment. Yeah, I'm going to be honest with you. After watching last night's, I don't hate Jim and Alexis nearly as much as I used to. Ew, really? Gross. Why? I'm always hating them.

No, I mean, look, I hate everybody on the show. Let me just preface this with I hate everybody except for Brianna and Gina Kehoe. Everybody else is horrible. So I don't know. You know, I do think that Jim really just did want to sit down with Heather's husband to talk about the fact that he called Alexis phony, which she is. But, you know, I think that he was, you know, in his right mind to stand up and walk away when Tamara came over. And it's not about Tamara is bringing the truth and he's running away from it. It's called Tamara stirs the pot and she's a fucking monster. And I wouldn't want to deal with her.

Yes, but also his own wife was the one who made him go over there. Well, and on top of that, I actually – I think it's okay. He wanted to speak to Terry mano a mano is what they say, although that doesn't make sense. That means hand to hand. But he wanted to speak to Terry and then all these people came over. So I understood Jim's frustration and he should have just said, hey, you know what? Let's just do this alone. Let's just have a good time tonight.

But instead, he stormed off, and he left his wife at the party. That's the problem. That's the part of it. Oh, after saying, oh, what, you're wearing the pants of the family? That misogynistic fucking asshole. Okay, that was disgusting. That's like, he left. He was going to drive off.

He wasn't going to say to his wife, like, hey, I got to go. He just bolted right on out of there, and she comes running out. She's like, babe, babe, as if he could hear her when she's like you know he's already you know what the funny thing is like had she not you know run into the middle of the road he would have left her behind in the dust yeah with no problems and he would have blamed her for it so he would have been like well you know you made me come to this party no no he didn't i don't think that she made him come to the party. First of all, I think producers made him come to the party. Yeah, but he would have blamed the producers.

He would have been like, because the stupid show that you're doing, I was forced to go. Well, look, you have to admit, I think he's trying to please his wife who clearly wants to be on TV. I don't think that he wants

anything to do with it. Oh, come on. Okay, here's the deal. He's doing nothing to his wife. I could be kind of on that side if Jim Bellino didn't have his own fucking blog giving his opinion

about every episode and how much of an asshole everyone is. That guy is too much of a pussy to show up and do it on TV because he knows he'll lose every single time. By him calling everybody an asshole, is he really wrong? No. No, but he's not doing it

to their face. Like any of these backstabbing bitches do? Yes, they do. Didn't you see last night? Tamara always brings the truth. Here's the thing. What I loved was the way how at the end of the episode when they give like the recaps of what they're doing now, it says Alexis is no longer with Fox 5. Then there's a pause and it goes, she and Jim are opening a trampoline park.

Okay. I have to be completely honest right now. That was amazing. Nothing on TV makes me happier than those freeze frames with those two bullet points per. I mean, it is the best part of the season to me. And what also shows you where the produce what the producers think, because if the producers like them, then they get like a generally nice thing. If the producers think they're fucking idiots, they get the trampoline park. OK, yeah.

OK, well, let's get back to broken necks soon. Yeah. Okay, well, let's get back. Home of 10,000 broken necks soon. We need to get back to Vicky and Tamara and the fight because it's spun out of control. And I just want to get your, like, honestly, I just really want Ronnie to recreate Vicky screaming at Tamara in the hallway. Well, I just love that whole escalation of the fight because, as always happens on these shows, one person is in the other person's face. And the other person is like, what is this? What are you doing? Why are you yelling at me?

I'm not going to fight with you. And one person is normally significantly more drunk. Yes. I'm not going to fight with you. We're friends. What are you doing? And then all of a sudden she stands up and it's like greases up her hair, takes out her earrings, and she's like

What are you talking about? Is there nothing more terrifying when Vicky points a finger in your face and screams? I mean, my god. It's terrifying. But this one was special because unlike the other times when she screamed and pointed a finger, this time she had a granny fur on, which made it

especially downy. All she was missing was a purse to hit Tamara. A shell purse from the Sofia Petrillo. But you know what, though? We have to thank our lucky stars because the two times that Vicky has exploded this season and has yelled like that, she's been in some weird outfit.

Because last time, her hair was all done up like the 80s. That is true. This has been a great experience for her. Poor Vicky. She really does need to get past her super religious roots and just meet a gay person who will tell her. Well, I don't know that that's – That's where we come in. There was a lot of gays warming up in that party that were trying to get on camera and just step off, boys.

They were trying so hard hard but none of them could you know here's the if you're very gay on orange county you need to you need to like start some shit you need to throw a glass of champagne at this at the driveway or something like that you know that's how you get on tv you don't get on tv if you're gay and in orange county you're probably going to get killed so get the hell out of there yeah that's all i'm going to say i uh anyway okay what you're going on oh i wanted to talk about the end of bogate because i thought that was effing hysterical poor sarah when sarah finally got kicked out of the party and she's kind of half crying outside going what is this world come to that was the most amazing moment of the season. It really was.

That was her Rodney King moment. I loved it. Who was that other whore that was with her? Oh, I don't know. There's sort of like this generic pool of blondes that appear at these things. But I thought Sarah could not have been more wonderfully dramatic at that moment. Is this what the world has come to? Kicking people out for a piece of cake?

Yes, actually. That was pretty funny, though. I mean, you know, it goes from Heather telling her off, okay, and then Heather still telling her off, and Heather still telling her off. Commercial break. Heather still telling her off. And then Heather's like, oh, no.

Oh, no. Hey, everybody, come in here. Can I get the entire cast in here? Cast call. Cast call. 15 minutes till show time. Going to give a show speech. All right, everybody tell her off. And then how tragic was it that Slade was trying to make his last push for the season and is like, no, I'm going to stand up for my new best friends, Heather and Terry, and escort her out?

Well, he knows where the money is. He knows who he's got to cozy up to. friends heather and terry and escort her out well he knows where the money is you know he knows who he's got to cozy up to here's my question is this do you think slay would have been a more effective uh bouncer if he wasn't wearing a black turtleneck i think that the turtleneck throws the whole thing i think people didn't take him seriously they thought he was like a poet of some sort and they thought he wasn't going to beat them up yeah there's some weird fashion in orange county he was wearing a turtleneck and jim was wearing a vest don't get me started on that. That vest was the gayest thing I have ever seen, and I'm talking about gay late 90s.

And Alexis running out into the street in that little hooker rabbit fur. Like, what are you guys doing in the morning? And what about Gretchen's cheap feathers in her hair that kept getting stuck in Tamara's lip gloss? Heather, I mean, Gretchen looked like she was in the El Pas musical um version of oklahoma best little four house in texas or that yeah they're like just go to michael's grab some

feathers for 25 cents a piece and glue them all over those bitches and send them out um how cheap was that nasty ass bracelet she gave tamra oh, this is what this symbolizes. This part is because I like hearts. This part is because you like black. And this part is... Could you have a more shallow fucking bracelet? Let me tell you... I got it at the mall because I know you like malls.

Can I just say this? You know, we already discussed earlier and all season long how much, you know, Tamara is the most vile human being on the face of the earth every time that woman cries no tears come out of her fucking eyes because she's a faker well she's got evil eye that's why she's got bad she's a faker just dries up the evil eye cry well she's also got so much botox that her ducts are dried out i mean can't haven't you

noticed that her nose can't even move whenever she smiles? Like the very middle part of her nose crinkles up, but nothing else moves. It's the creepiest fucking thing. Let's be honest. When she cries, the tears come out of her elbows. Okay, everything's in the wrong place. She's like, why is my big toe leaking? I'm just crying.

And she cries at the drop of a hat now. Okay, like she goes to McDonald's, she orders a Happy Meal, and she talks about how happy the Happy Meal made her and she starts to cry. Okay. She's out of control. She is out of control. I will give you – Why is Vicky being mean to me? This is not how I wanted it to be.

Screaming and yelling at her boyfriend and calling her a wuss and being controlled. Do you not remember any of that? By the way, what was up with Eddie? Okay. Here's this guy, this stupid guy Brooks is starting up with your fiancé, and Eddie's just sitting there. What sort of man is that? He's like sitting there pigging out too. He's like popping back popcorn like he's watching a game.

He knows who he's dealing with. I love these crazy bitches. Well, look, he's trying – I mean, clearly he's not in love with Tamara. He's in love with being on camera. Well, he's not sure if he was in love with being on camera, he would have made it. He would have like flipped that table and like punched Brooks, which would I think he was taken aback by Vicky's psycho hyena screams. Well, that's I don't know. There are other people who would have been a lot more aggressive.

OK. I don't know. There are other people who would have been a lot more aggressive. I mean I often wonder about that, him personally. But also I wonder about heterosexuality in general. Like when he's in the car with Tamara and she's – one minute she's all romantic and sweet. But then you see the real Tamara where she's like, well, then you know what Alexis said. I mean Alexis is just fake and everyone hates her. And she's just a fake idiot. I'm going to tell her. And if that means that I have to tell her, then I'm going to tell her. I mean I don't she's just a fake idiot. I'm going to tell her. And if that means that I have to tell

her, then I'm going to tell her. I mean, I don't care if it hurts her feelings. I'm all about the truth. And just her vile personality spilling out. And the man just stands there and looks at her like, oh, that's a woman for you. I mean, is it really? Because these shows have made

me more secure in my homosexuality than any. That's true. Then you just have to watch the A-list New York to have it reset the other way. No kidding. No kidding. I come out of that begging for vagines. Now, I have to say.

Yuck. I have to say. So when Vicky then went out, she threatened to leave. She and Brooke storm out and everything. And then there's this whole talk. And then Brianna goes out there and yada, yada, yada. And Heather says, I want you to stay. I'm going to do a toast, et cetera.

So she finally brings – she finally gets Vicky back in for this toast. Heather gives like a nice stupid toast about the brownies and – And then Vicky trumps her. Yeah, then all of a sudden Vicky goes, and I'd like to give a toast to say I'm sorry for storming out. But I love Brooks and you're either in or you're out. What? That was totally inappropriate. I'd like to give a toast for you never being able to have a party

that isn't about me. Cheers! Yeah, I don't think that sat too well with Heather. I mean, after Bogate, now can anybody else steal her thunder? Yes, Vicky. If Heather stays on this show, which I think she probably – I think she saved herself with Bo-Gate. She is going to – I don't think her and Vicky are going to get along very well.

Here's the thing. Oh, hell no. I thought Heather really proved her mettle when she was going after Sarah. So Heather is pretty calm. But when you finally rattled her enough, she is vicious with her put-downs. She attacks. I know, but I know. I mean, no, she she's like she's clearly way

smarter than everybody else so her her you know her put downs are you know up there with the countesses which is saying a lot but i just really wanted her to go hey bitch i'm gonna kick you out and like brought over i mean there was bodyguards standing in the foyer why didn't they just drag her out by her hair the most awkward bodyguards you see the way they like came into frame and like froze and then quietly stepped backwards? Yeah, but I wanted her to be physically removed from the house, not by Slade. No, but I liked Heather's way of doing it because the way Heather attacks, it's a little different than Luanne. Luanne attacks with cold, waspy condescension.

The way Heather attacks is she just sort of like, she just attacks you with words and takes you down and acts like a mom. And then by the end, you're just like a little puddle of crying mess. You're like Sarah there wondering where the world has come to because you've been totally taken down by this crazy woman who gets her way no matter what happens. Okay. Well, let's talk – I mean who do you think is coming back from the cast? What kind of changes are you expecting? I mean obviously we saw everybody's little write-ups at the end, but the freeze frames, Vicky and Brooke seem to be on again, off again, on again, off again. But, like, who's coming back?

Where are the alliances? What are we to expect for next season? I believe that they start shooting typically in August, so we'll see. I guess that Alexis will be the only one out and replaced. You think, I don't think Alexis will be replaced. You think so? Well,

who's she going to shoot with? She has nobody there. I mean, she doesn't have Gretchen. She does Vicky. I mean, what? She's going to hang out with Vicky.

I mean, that's never going to happen. I mean, everybody's been talking about that this year, but I just don't see that being able to like sustain itself for 18 episodes. Yeah. What a friendship with Vicky? Yeah, I don't see the two of them hanging out at all. Vicky's only being friends... Vicky's

only talking to her to make Tamara mad. I mean, you can see it in her face. She has no desire to say anything. What do you say to Alexis? She's a fucking moron. Okay, so you think Alexis is gone. Ben and I think... Ben and I are probably a little bit more on the fence right there. I don't think anyone's gone. I don know why anyone's i think i think everyone's there i think okay well do you think that there's any additions i mean do you think i mean i don't

think sarah is rich enough to become a cast member um and you guys know in my dream of dreams gina kehoe returns to um you know saddle up with vicky and become i think that that's a huge possibility please jesus listen to me. Please. The thing is that they've never brought back someone. That's the only thing. But why not bring back Gina? She's from the original franchise, the original cast. It would only be

coming full circle, Ben. I would like it. I would like it. And they might as well, because that bitch ain't leaving. I mean, she will find... That girl has a good sense for an Evite. That's for sure. She sniffs it out like a bloodhound. I would also like Lynn Curtin to come back.

I mean if you ask me, a few seasons ago they had the season when Lynn's family basically fell apart. That was a great season. And when one of her daughters became a hooker. Yeah, yeah. I mean there's nothing better than watching that. And quite frankly, they took Lynn out of the equation. And I have to say, the Housewives has not been nearly as strong, of Orange County, has not been as strong since they took out Lynn.

I'm just saying. Okay, well, I think Lynn coming back would be great. I mean, nobody's going to— I don't want to get rid of Gretchen. I think Gretchen is done. I'm sick of Gretchen. I think Gretchen needs to lose Slade, and then she can stay. I'm sick of Gretchen.

I think Gretchen needs to lose Slade and then she can stay. From Wondery, this is Black History For Real. I'm Francesca Ramsey. And I'm Conscious Lee. What do most people think about when they hear the words Black History? Rosa Parks, Reconstruction, MLK, February, Black History Month. Exactly, exactly. There are so many stories of black history that we just are not really talking about or thinking about, especially outside of February.

And we are about to flip the script on all of that. Because on this show, you're going to hear a little less. In August 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue. And a little bit more. She is a heroine to some. As a fighter for black rights, she is a villain to others. Follow Black History for Real on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. Listen everywhere on February 5th, or you can listen early and ad-free on Wondery Plus starting January 29th.

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Gretchen was good when they all hated her, when Vicky and Tamara hated her, but now she's just not. Tamara is not going to be able to sustain a friendship with her. Tamara is the evil devil monster whore, so it's like, you know, she and Gretchen are clearly going to rub each other the wrong way at some point.

Next season will all be about Tamara and Vicky going at it. Gretchen will be an ally. Gretchen's going to be so boring. Nothing but boring. It's going to be nothing but her and Slade fighting. It's going to all be about Tamara and Vicky going at it. Gretchen will be an ally. Gretchen is going to be so boring. Nothing but boring. It's going to be nothing but her and Slade fighting. It's going to be the worst ever. Do you think that there is any possibility that they would up Brianna to real housewife just because she's fighting so much with Vicky and it makes for great TV and she is also a newlywed? No.

Well, she's also a housewife. That's true. She's not interesting enough on her own. That is a lie. I love her. Look at her. She went to Vegas and had the most boring Vegas trip ever documented on reality TV. I mean, seriously. That's true. I have to say that the Orange County women

have really upped their game in the past couple of weeks. I think that we look at it from a different perspective because we enjoy making fun of them. But their show sucks. It's not fun. They don't do anything. The best thing about this show is listening to the terrible English.

Alexis makes me laugh every time because she can't talk. And Gretchen learning the word however. However. However. However. Cracks me up. Things like that make me laugh laugh but i don't think this is a very good one i mean that's kind of a good point because at least like the new york cast has like real events to go to whereas in the oc it's just like unless somebody's having a party at like a bunco party on their back deck like what the the hell are they doing? Listen, the truth is this.

Orange County is just a boring place, okay? I'm just going to say it, okay? So if you put a TV show there, the TV show ultimately will be boring. Yeah, like where are they going to go, the opening of the new Buca di Peppa? Like just get on with these bitches. They're going to go to Costa Mesa, to the mall there. I was going to say like a red carpet opening at Chico's Costa Mesa. Yeah, which I, by the way, I would go to. I a red carpet opening at Chico's Costa Mesa. Yeah.

Which, by the way, I would go to. I would totally go to that. Well, have we finished with this show? We've got lots of Housewives this week. I feel tapped. Oh, wait. One last question about Orange County. After all this with the cake, did anyone ever see anyone eat the cake? Did anyone actually eat it and enjoy it?

Yes. Take a guess who ate it. Vicky? Vicky? Vicky. Fucking Vicky, who's just naturally never going to be as thin as anybody else because God hates her. Like sitting there, she's like eating the cake. This is delicious.

Oh, I never thought I'd be treated like that by a good friend. I never thought a good friend would do that to me. Just cameras on. Have some respect. If Brooks really – if she and Brooks really do break up or if they're no longer together right now, you know she's 472 pounds. Oh, yeah. No, they're together. And you also know, by the way, that Brooks totally took a doggie bag home from that party with like half the cake in it.

He's brought it back in like me. I keep those disposable Tupperware things that you can buy in the grocery store. I keep those in my trunk. Oh, my God. I am learning way too much. I like the way you work, Ronnie. I'm moving to the OC, baby. Steal some cake. Steal some fondant bows.

Give a collection. You're a fondant bows. You have a collection. You're a fondant bow smuggler. I love it. What is the world coming to? Oh, my God. At least, like, aren't you, like, so excited they gave her a close-up for that line? It was awesome. And you were all off that fake nose.

What's funny about Sarah is that she's one of those young old people where sometimes she she looks like she's 28 or 31, and sometimes she looks like she's 55. I love that when people are like that. I'm so fascinated. I can't stop looking at them. Yeah, Sarah, you can tell with her lips sometimes they get that old lady look. But whoever she's seeing, she's got the best plastic surgeon on the show. She looks, I think, very good. Either that or she's really young and doing a lot of meth, is possible too well it is the oc yeah what else is there to do

meth and the mahal custom is south coast plaza well i'm sure oh my god i'm sure okay sounds like saturday we could clearly talk about an hour so should we move to new york or should we move to jersey um in life i would prefer to move to New York or should we move to Jersey? In life, I would prefer to move to New York over moving to New Jersey. But in terms of talking about these shows, I'm fine with either one. Take it away, Matt. Okay, let's talk about New York briefly because I think Jersey was

way juicier this week. So New York pretty much was just all about a party for Sonya for some magazine that nobody reads because nobody reads magazines anymore. I'll tell you who reads that magazine, OK? The only people who read that magazine are those housewives because every season one of them winds up on the cover of it. And I don't think anyone reads it.

What's it called? Social Life Magazine or something like that? I think they read Social Life Magazine and I think they read Hamptons Weekly because Kelly Killoran-Ben Simone is on the cover every summer. Because it's always the same girl. The editor-in-chief of Social Life Magazine, she always shows up on camera. She did it this year. She did it when Bethany was on the cover every summer. Because it's always the same girl. You know, the editor-in-chief of Socialite magazine, she always shows up on camera. This year she did when Bethany was on the cover and everything. So, yeah.

Clearly there's a deal there. But anyway, the point was that Ramona is clearly still upset that she wasn't invited by Heather to go to London for – You were invited to London? I wasn't invited to London. Maybe she just forgot to invite me to London. Maybe if we have lunch together and I'm nice to her, then she'll think to invite me to London. Surely she'll invite me to London. Maybe I just need to invite me to London. Maybe if we have lunch together and I'm nice to her, then she'll think to invite me to London.

Surely she'll invite me to London. Maybe I just need to run into her in the street. Maybe. It's like, oh my God, that fucking woman. Okay, so honestly, did anything else happen the entire episode besides her eyes bugging out? Well, first of all, okay, here's one thing that happened. Sonia is quietly turning into Mrs. Havisham, okay?

She's sitting there in her bed with her little tray of, like, chocolate drink, and she has her little intern dotavisham, okay? She's sitting there in her bed with her little tray of chocolate drink, and she has her little intern doting over her, okay? Don't you love that she thinks that's a diet drink when clearly it was semi-sweet chocolate chips from the freezer melted into a mason jar? I know, I was like, oh, I'm gonna do that.

Meanwhile, also... It's a health drink. It's a health drink. I mean, could there be anything more high-low culture than that moment of watching this woman who was a former Morgan and here she is reading the posts and drinking a weird chocolate drink while some like woman is like doting on her and like the roof is caving in from Hurricane Irene. I know. You see like pan across one of the rooms. Don't you just feel like there are like dirty stacks of newspapers and like mouse

droppings everywhere everywhere everywhere and you know she actually mentioned hurricane irene again this week i think i think she was saying like oh you know the divorce the divorce and the dead and the movie deal in hurricane irene i'm like let's just stop stop with hurricane irene okay the other things are fine but you have to stop having ownership over hurricane irene okay there are houses that blew away in vermont okay covered bridges that were 200 years old that were swept into rivers and you have a leak that's there because as matt has mentioned many times there's five blackberries clogged in your toilet it has nothing to do with hurricane irene there are five blackberries in the toilet and she can't afford to get a roofer and pay him $80 to clean the fucking gutters. That's why she's turning into Mrs. Havisham. She's going to sit in that bed forever.

I find Sonya to be so phony. Like, this whole thing, this whole character thing she's doing, I just think it's so sad. It's totally sad. Oh, please, let's read the post, because that's the only way I know what my friends are doing. You know, I just have to read about them in the newspaper,

because I don't know how to check my voice. It's like, shut up. It's fairly obvious. Everybody saw what Bethany did and how she made her empire and I just think that Sonya's trying to create this Sonya in the City brand and character and guess what? That

ship has sailed. It's not going to happen. Sail to Best Buy because I'm going to get myself a Sonya toaster oven, okay? Know what I'm saying? You know that. I really thought you were going to get myself a Sonia toaster oven. You know what I'm saying? I really thought you were going to say that it was sailing to Quag. I thought you were going to go there. That's just nasty, Matt.

I would never say that. It's just one of those places that was cool and then just wasn't cool. Just like Cindy Barshop. Cindy Barshop was never cool. She is the Quag toaster oven of the Real Housewives. Now here's what I like about the Sonya angle on this episode. It wasn't just that Sonya has this weird thing going on in her bedroom.

But I'm kind of loving Luann's stealth campaign to turn Sonya against Ramona. I mean Luann is so unsubtle. She's like, no, I've noticed you and Ramona are like, does she always tell you what to do? And you like that? You're fine with that? You're fine with her saying that? Because it seems sort of rude to me,

but you're fine with that? That's strange. I mean, your face... You seem totally controlled. Yeah, let's get a salad. Yeah. So would Ramona let you eat salad if you wanted salad? Or she probably wouldn't let you, would she?

What do you feel about that? Feel like you're in prison? You know, it's funny because whenever you mention salad, Ramona gets so mad at you. And then she whispers into your ear and you look so uncomfortable. And, I mean, I just wouldn't want you to feel uncomfortable. That was pretty good when she said she comes up behind you and whispers in your ear and you make this look. And Sonya made a look like Jesus Luan. And Luan's like, yes, that look right there.

She's like, oh, my God, did you see that? Luan is really a very clunky manipulator. But God bless her because I love watching her. I love watching her at work, you know? She's just – yeah, she's not subtle at all. She's getting worse as the years go on. Come on, ladies. Let's meet for lunch, ladies.

Oh, wonderful to see you. Ramona blackmailed me. Okay, I'm off to meet Jacques. Have a nice lunch. She is a paranoid mess and I love it. She really doesn't like to waste time. She really wants to get this manipulated. She wants to turn everyone on as soon as possible without saying,

Hey, everyone, can we just turn on her? She's just going to do it like, She's like, Okay, I'm tuning down. I'm talking to you. Let's get this going. Okay, Ramona's bad because of X, Y, and Z. Later. Exactly. The sad thing is that Sonya is the pawn here. It's like, Oh, really? Are we fighting over that?

Sonya has no idea what's going on, okay? She thinks she's in some castle in the middle of Italy. All right. She really – I mean, my god. I mean, if she is so well-connected with all these royals, can one of them hook her up? I mean, seriously. By the way – I don't think she's well-connected.

I mean, I think once you're divorced, once they leave you, you're done. You're shunned. You're out. She's connected to the Kansas City Royals. I think she can't afford season tickets to the Yankees, so she goes to the Kansas City Royals. I was going to say, I think she might have done the catcher from the 1984 team. She's like, I go out there, I get some barbecue, I see some boys. It's great.

I love it. Well, we did see her last year or two years ago. She does like to wear a sexy softball uniform. Yeah, exactly. Oh, God. God bless her. She just smells like musty. I don't even want to think about it.

Change the subject. I don't even want to know what her Lady Toaster smells like. I think it smells like a mixture of um talcum powder and horseradish sauce on chocolate because you know she scratches down there guys those are all wonderful things why are you giving them you know that that's a leaky tote it smells like sardines and best sauce and we and we were calling were calling Jim Bellino the misogynist. Listen, it smells like Italian breadcrumbs. And three-day-old kale.

Three-day-old kale. Let's be honest. It really smells like pork shoulder with rutabaga. I think it smells like wet nickels. And when you're done, when you're trying to get olives out of the jar and you spill the juice on the counter

and you smell it the next day. I think it smells kind of like peach yogurt that may have expired with a dash of pomfron. I think it smells like dog food when you accidentally get it wet. Yeah. Mixed with onion that you can't get out of the bottom of your sink. I think it kind of smells sort of like a springtime medley salad in a box thing.

Mixed with – perhaps mixed with like a little bit of cardboard and a little bit of – you know, sometimes like a little bit of like balloon. You know the way balloon smells? Okay. Like I have Diet Coke coming out of my nose. Oh, you know what it smells like? It smells like Diet Coke coming out of Matt's nose. Diet Coke coming out of Matt's nose. I don't know.

Okay. So speaking of stinky vagina, what do you guys think about Ramona not being able to go to London? What do you think about that? I think it's a little – well, here's the thing. I mean I think it's a little mean. I do – if you're going to invite Luann – What is wrong with you, Ben? Okay.

If you're going to invite everyone but not Ramona, it's a little callous. But if Heather is willing to accept that and she seems actually like she's going to stand behind it, that's fine. That's why it's good because Heather is willing to just be like, yeah, I don't like you. I don't think we're friends. You're not fucking invited. Yeah. I mean it is kind of amazing watching Ramona squirm and try to passive-aggressively show how inclusive that she is as well. Yeah, how fun would that trip be?

I think it's totally cunty because in the real world, it's not just a trip to London. It's a two-week shooting spree. So by not inviting her, she's cutting her out of shooting on purpose. She's trying to push her out. It's like the new girl comes in and tries to push out the reigning queen. Bitch, you better watch it. It is. You better watch it. The reigning queen is countess Luann not Ramona

well she only got an invite because Heather decided to play it safe yeah well now here's my question though here's my question about Heather is she phony or is she real because you could say that she's keeping it real because she's not giving a disingenuous invitation to Ramona

but then you could say she's being but then you could say she's keeping it real because she's not giving a disingenuous invitation to Ramona, but then you could say she's being fake by being so friendly to Ramona. You know, although their drinks were fake. They're all fake to each other and they all give, like, doubly bullshit kisses. I actually like the fact, I mean, Heather's voice makes

me want to kill myself, but I do like the fact that she's just like not having ramona's a bullshit but you know well i think it's fake because she's pretending like she's even paying for this goddamn trip in the first place when you know that that's not true it's a bravo trip they have to take one every season so for her to be a bitch to somebody is just not even though ramona is one of the most aggravating people on the face of the earth don't but don't i don't believe that this is going to be like the big trip of the season it's a weekend it's a weekend trip well it's still it's still it's you know everyone's going

to be shooting together except ramona it's true there's something about heather um when uh there's something about her phoniness like you know we agree they are everyone's fake everyone is fake but there's something about hers that comes off as particularly obnoxious to me like you know there's some sides of heather that are that are cool but when she's being fake she is so extraordinarily fake and she can just become very mean very quickly uh it really is a turnoff for me like awesome when she was having drinks with ramona she got pretty she sort of was like everything was fun and nice. And then all of a sudden, Ramona was like, well, we're new friends, new acquaintances.

And she's like, are we? It's like, oh, okay. That was awesome. That was amazing. Well, Heather just wants to do that whole smiley I'm your friend thing because she doesn't think it's worth her time to fight with somebody yeah which i think is right but you know in a way that's looking down on somebody if ramona's telling you if she's making all this effort you know and you're just smiling to her face because you don't think it's like even worth your time to fight with her that's cunty you know okay okay call me crazy and don't queue up the carly ray jepsen but maybe if i were heather i would still be pissed and I would have a hard time letting it go that I came over to your house and you were a fucking bitch to me and told me that I talk too much when you really don't even know me. I would not be able to let that go and I would be like, fine, fuck you.

I don't want to be your friend. Yeah, I agree. But Ramona would go to Michelle Obama and be like, oh my god. Hi, Michelle. I know black people. I love black people. Do you grow vegetables? Because that's disgusting.

Do you know that those are grown in poop? So basically you're married to a president and you're eating poop every day. I mean, that's disgusting. How could you do that? Oh my god, I love your house. She doesn't know. She's a fucking retard. And remember, this is the same woman who went up to the then governor of New York, David Patterson, who's blind, and started talking to

him about how she sort of has vision problems. Okay? Don't forget that. As soon as Heather talks about her son's kidney or liver disability, Avery was born with an umbilical cord around her neck. She is the queen of stupidity, so you're right.

I don't believe... I think that it was rude what Ramona said to Heather, for sure. It was, but I mean, I don't believe for one second that Heather did not watch every single episode of this show before she came on it. Right. I honestly don't think that Carol would

have bothered. I think Carol was just like, fine, I'll show up, whatever, but Heather studied... Heather studied those tapes. Yeah, I'll be on the TV. Oh, TV. Oh, look how colorful and look how flat I look on the TV. Oh, TV. Oh, look how colorful. Look how flat I look on the TV. Oh, wow.

Look at us in London. I feel like we're like the 1%. Let's go find a protest and feel real. Oh, one person's protest is another person's post office. Like, what the fuck is she even talking about? You notice that every scene that she's in without the other women is like beautifully art directed. I swear to God she has a team of like 40 people there that are like, no, use this cashmere tank top. No, sling your vintage Nikon camera this way over your shoulder. Like what the fuck?

Well, you know, she did work for Diane Sawyer and Peter Jennings, so she may have just picked up a few things. Did she mention that, by the way, that she used to work for Peter Jennings and Diane Sawyer? No, not at all. What did she do for them exactly? Well, she used to work for Peter Jennings and Diane Sawyer. And it was crazy. She'd go to Afghanistan and stuff. But that's all on account of the fact that she used to work for Peter Jennings and Diane Sawyer.

I haven't seen a protest like this since I was in Afghanistan. Shut up! I felt more scared on the Upper East Side with the 1%ers than I have at these protests. You're comparing the fucking Occupy Wall Street dorks with Kandahar. Well, that was...

She did actually have a... She had a few funny lines. She's sort of getting there. She had some funny lines about how Luann always is name-dropping random royalty in Europe whenever she's around Carol. Oh, I like Carol. Don't get me wrong. I'm making fun of her, but I like her. She's my favorite too. And she looked great, by the way, at the party with her hair pulled back and everything.

She looked fantastic. She's beautiful. I just think it's – No, her mouth her mouth is fucked up come on well also she got her teeth before they were perfected i'm telling you anybody who got those uh porcelain teeth put in before like five years ago god bless them because i know they've come such a long way you know those things are like a foot out of her mouth i know it really does mess up that upper lip yeah but it makes her look like she's one of the 99 percenters now so it's okay that is true um wait i wanted yeah her oh sorry go ahead no i

was just uh i was just gonna make a point about the uh the london trip but if you're gonna talk about carol since we're talking about carol go oh i i was gonna talk about her um gay slave oh yeah she's like everyone's gotta have that whatever his name is well i love that she wouldn't just admit that like that's what the deal was there. But she's like, yeah, he's my little gossipy bitch that does neighborhood watching. Whenever I snap my fingers, he licks my boots. And then she has this weird thing. She's like, yeah, we like to just sit on the stoop and talk about things.

I'm like, bullshit. Oh, like she's fucking Marla Gibbs and it's 227. My ass. Yeah, exactly. Like she sits on a stoop. Look at Marla Gibbs and it's 227. Yeah, exactly. Like she sits on a stoop, you know.

We're on the milk crates talking about Jackay, please. She's getting her hair braided up. Hey, Mary, what you doing down there, Mary? Mary. Oh, Mary. Mary. Oh, Mary. Hey, Mary, that girl used to be on the news, Mary. Was that Pearl or was that song? That was amazing, Pearl. Hey, Mary, that girl used to be on the news, Mary. Was that Pearl or was that song?

That was amazing, Pearl. That was Pearl. Oh, my God. You're Pearl and you are hanging out the window. Oh, my God. Hey, what's that 99% about, Mary? What about Lesta? What about Lesta?

That's a lot. 99% of people is mad. That's a lot of people, Mary. Mary. Oh, Mary. I can't be doing those portraits. I got to meet Mario Singer up on the upper

east side. I got to look pretty for Mary. Hashtag 227. So clearly Luann is Sandra uh carol is pearl who's the most boring one the most boring one is rose so rose is aviva and ramona ramona's brenda she's always getting into trouble oh brenda jenkins brenda jenkins by the way i love this analogy and i will cherish this podcast because we brought you into it finally took 22 episodes but we got what what the hell else happened on new york i felt it was like boring and nothing happened there was a lot that happened so first of all the other the other stuff that happened was that ramona got wasted at

this party and it was the first time we saw crazy drunk Ramona all season. That's true. That was great. She was a mess and then she got mad at Sonia for going on this trip and Ramona's feelings. I didn't really understand Ramona's point. She was just drunk at that point. She was a sloppy mess and Mario regulated her in the bathroom.

Her point was that her stupid bimbo friend is standing there like, oh, you didn't get invited? Well, I don't get invited everywhere, Ramona. What's the big deal? Do you invite me everywhere? I don't get it. And that's not the point.

She's getting cut out of shooting. And Sonya's like, well, who gives a shit, bitch? I'm going with the popular girls. The other thing, this is the point I was going to maybe bring up before, was that Heather had a leg to stand on when she was saying how we all went to brunch. We had such a fun time. I thought, you know what? I'm going to London. Why don't we all go to London?

That makes total sense. You guys went to brunch. It was fun. But then you invite Luann, and then it's not – you don't have that excuse anymore. Now it's really like you've invited everyone but Ramona. It's bitchy. I'm sorry. You know what would be really funny?

If she then invited Kelly Killer and Ben Simone and Cindy Barshop. And Mario and Avery. And the entire staff of Truth, Faith, Jewelry. Or True Renewal. She can invite the cast of The A-List, New York. Oh, by the way, at Sonya's party, did you notice that little red-headed queen from A-List, New York? Yes, that little hair. The horrible queen.

The hairdressing wannabe bitch. Oh, God. He's horrible. TJ was, like, mugging for the camera. The horrible queen. The hairdressing wannabe bitch. TJ. Oh, God. He's horrible. TJ was like mugging for the camera. Fucking horrible human being. Like whenever there was a fight, he's standing right behind it and looking, staring straight into the camera. Like, bitch, really? I have this thing where I think I mentally block out anyone who's on the A-list in New York.

Well, sidebar, but according to Riken's latest tweets, the show got canceled even after they had started filming. So toodles, TJ. Whoops. Bye. Well, isn't Logo not gay anymore? I heard that they were shifting away from gay. Makes sense. Yeah, they might want to change their name from Logo.

Well, no, they're trying to do things that are gay-friendly programming like Bravo, but it's not necessarily explicitly like rainbow-colored flags, that kind of thing i'm embarrassed to ask this but why would they have to change her name from logo what does logo mean yeah i don't think that it just sounds well maybe it sounds gay okay great matt oh i thought maybe it was like a gay thing well i'm assuming the l and g have something to do with a lesbian and gay but i could be wrong just being narrow-minded and oh but I could be wrong. Just being narrow-minded. Oh, Matt. Very good.

I just don't see things. I don't see subtle things. You could be a housewife. Yeah. Why don't we move on to New Jersey? Wait, wait, wait. Did anything happen to one-legged, peg-legged Aviva? Yeah, she went into an elevator

and nearly had a heart attack. Oh, she's ridiculous. That woman has no fucking interest in so she just makes shit up. Oh, I have such phobias. Really like Kyle on Beverly Hills last year because I really don't need to see that. She can't go on a free fabulous trip to London

because her husband won't hold her hand on the airplane. She doesn't want to be trapped in machinery. What can you say? You can't fight with that. If someone doesn't want to be trapped in machinery, you can't put them in a machine. Okay, good point. You don't know how many conveyor belts there might be in London. Yeah, do you know how hard it is for her to get to the security checkpoints when she has to put her bags on the belt?

I was going to say, imagine her at baggage. Her at baggage claim must be a fucking nightmare. She has a hard enough time going to the supermarket and checking out, okay? She can't get near. She cannot get near the TSA. Oh, please. It's like she goes into a supermarket. There's too many germs there. She'd have to wear her fucking gas

mask and take a Cipro. She walks in in something looking like the Michelin Man. It's her protective gear. Then she stays away from the conveyor belt, gets her hummus, and leaves. With all of her children who have mixed up names because she changes them every five minutes. God, I really like that Aviva. That woman really struggles to be interesting.

She does. We should make t-shirts that say that. That is just like the best. That's a Luann type of put down. You know what, though? I feel like there's more. A lot of work. I think we're going to get something out of Aviva.

Don't you worry. Look, she married a man slut, okay? This guy who slept with everyone. She married a man slut, and we did see in the season preview that she calls Ramona and Sonia white trash bitches. So we know the goods are yet to come. Yeah. Well, she's already stirring the pot, so she's doing a pretty good job already. Yeah, she's fine.

She's quiet, but she's getting things going. She's mixing things up. Good for her. Agreed. I'll back down. Okay, Jersey. We've been talking a long time, but we've got to talk about Jersey. Yeah.

Oh, my God. Teresa. Where do we start? Jesus Christ. I love that Teresa has absolutely zero self-awareness. Yeah. And she thinks that everyone else is as stupid as she is. Oh, so you lost your two friends, so now you're going to call your family the very –

and it's like the second she walks out of there, she's like, hi, Kat, can we have lunch? Come on. My question is this. So, you know, later in the episode, after the fight, which I'm sure we'll talk about very shortly, Melissa, she confronts Melissa about what she talked with

Danielle, and Melissa owns up to it. Melissa was very upfront and said, I did it. I was in a bad place. I was angry at you. I was hormonal. I did it. And Teresa accepted her apology. Do you think Teresa would have accepted that apology if she hadn't already lost her friends? Hell no. Hell no. She would have yelled at Melissa.

I think that she would have because, no, I think she would have done exactly what she did, which is not really accept it because she kept saying, I'm sorry, and then Teresa's like, well, you did it, though. You did it. She's like, yeah, well, I'm sorry, but you did it. But you did it. You know, she has that, like, Tourette's where everyone's

against her. Yeah. And I think that she still would have done that, but that never happens on these shows. No one just says, I'm sorry. No. You know? It's hard to say I'm sorry. So we wouldn't know. Sorry seems to be the hardest word. I like that version of it.

Is that like a song from the 70s or something? Kind of. Well, there's also a Chicago song. It's hard for me to say I'm sorry. Oh, I know that. I love that. That was my Peter Cetera right there. Well, there was a tweet that came out the other night by Melissa Gorga that said something like, oh, well, I never got my apology.

It's like, oh, shut up, Melissa Gorga. I actually only think I like Melissa Gorga. What about Kathy? Oh, and Kathy. But Kathy has been – I haven't had enough Kathy in the past few episodes. I've got to be real. Let me tell you something. This is all you need to know about Kathy from this last episode.

We saw her like gardening. Okay. And she had like a little straw hat on and she had a garden trial and she was in her, in her little bushes. And to me, I was like, Kathy has done her part for this episode.

I am happy. She's gardening. And then she met Teresa and had a veggie wrap. And she listened to Teresa babble like a psychopath and then she questioned Teresa's motives and then she was gone. I need more. I always need more. Don't get me wrong. I'm sorry. You know what I don't need more of?

On display parties because guess what? The single didn't take off. It's not tardy for the party. It's not even a chic c'est la vie, if you will. So like, stop it already. Stop it. I love Midget Joe's tirade against mean people

on the internet. When she's like, Hey, read it for me, babe. I don't want to read it. Read it to me. That song sucks. You're a robot. And he's like, who does that? Robot. Oh, sorry, guys. I couldn't sit there

anymore, you guys. I can't just sit down. I feel like I'm in jail. For the listeners, Ronnie has a mobile microphone thing, and when he gets up from his chair, he turns into a robot. Sorry. But he's in a good mood sitting in his chair, like a good little boy. It's still happening, though, right? No, you sound good now. Okay. I forgot what I was going on about. Now I'm mad about robot voice.

No, now I'm mad that I'm sitting here. Your arms are crossed. You're mad. Yes, I am. I'm furious. You know what? On display. Oh, wait.

I have something to say about that dumb bitch, Melissa Gorga. Okay, listen. You guys, she's talking to Ryan Seacrest, okay? And he's like, hey, Melissa, so why do you feel like you're on display? Which is, I love that Ryan Seacrest makes like $80 kajillion a year for coming up with brilliant lines like that. And he's like, hey, Melissa, so why do you feel so on display? And she's like, well, you know, when you come into a new family, sometimes, really? So you're going to bring up your fight with Teresa on the Ryan Seacrest show?

And you came into this family years ago. Please shut up and stop acting so nice when all you do is use that witch to make money. Like you can hate Teresa all you want, but she's paying your bills, bitch. Well, not anymore. I mean I don't know about you guys, but you say that On Display didn't take off, but I think it's going to be a huge hit in Romania. Well, yes. Clearly, I mean, she's going to probably go on tour with Asa from Shaws of Sunset, and I mean, that would be an amazing double bill in Romania. Walking down the road. Tarantulas.

I would pay money to see that, to be honest. I'm not even lying. I would love to see the Tarantulas on display double feature. Oh, my God. I would pay all the money I have. Can we talk about Joe? Well, don't say anything mean on the internet because Midget Joe will be very upset about it. Speaking of Midget Joe, why, Ben, do you need to tweet photos of him flexing shirtless? Like it made me vomit.

Because it was funny. You kind of like it. I think you want to hit those muscles. He's cute. I never said I'd never. I've been totally upfront. I've always thought he was cute. He is 4'2", people, and he's bald.

That's fine. I'm bald. Thank you very much. Yeah, but you shaved your head. He tries to grow a chia pet. Look, I agree. Well, that's true. He does use that spray on hair.

Yeah. His hair does look sort of like bad macaroni, but I think that he is still very cute. I like Joe Gorga, and I think he's a good guy. I think Joe Gorga's hot. Yeah, for sure. I think he's hot. And I really – I think that he's got a big one because I've kind of tried to make out the outline of his wiener when they keep showing it. Yeah, and you know what?

Quite frankly, if he had a small one, he'd be a lot more of an asshole, and he's like totally cool and confident. Yeah, that guy – and also a short guy, you could toss him around a little bit. I can't handle how like all these like muscly dudes like him and Juicy Joe, like they think that they're all like muscly, but they all look like they have – Wait a second. They all look like they have pillowy boobs. OK. First of all, Joe Gorga is muscly but they all look like they have wait a second they all look like they have pillowy boobs okay first of all joe gorga is muscly you see those things on his body those are muscles okay now joe actually i mean joe judice is muscular too but he's let it all go to fat i mean it really looks like he looks like a big beanbag and i don't like he's got a lot of muscle he's just got a lot of fat too yeah i just don't like that that pillowy man breast he literally

looks like a pig and i'm not trying to be mean, but he literally has – his body looks like a pig's body. It's a very poor sign quality. And I would like to talk about his thoughts on therapy. I feel like every week we're getting a little bit of a deeper insight into his backstory. A few weeks ago he told a story about how, hey, one time me and my friend, we took out our penises and we're looking at our penises. And now he's like, yeah, you know, I once went to a therapist. You know, I got in some trouble and went and I saw all these dodos and I realized I didn't need therapy. It was the school just wasn't right for me.

That's all. Well, yeah, I mean it was – Clearly he has – We get to hear all that entire story, but it sounds like he probably murdered two nuns and set a school on fire. Well, he probably had some sort of illicit affair with another boy in the back of the school, and they wanted to call him in for therapy, and he decided just to do it. Well, here's the real question. That family is so anti-therapy.

Gia is going to need more therapy than anybody has ever had in their entire life, and he's going to be like, no, sorry, our family doesn't do that. Yeah, it's going to be rough. It's going to be rough. I mean, Gia is going gonna be at the spearmint rhino in about six weeks and it will be coyote ugly oh we're all i um i don't worry about gia because she seems like a total fame horner to me i think that already like she's already caused a lot of stupid drama for camera time i think she she's another Teresa waiting to happen. Maybe she'll get a summer

internship at Posh. She can only dream. That's a tough one to get. I hear Lauren Manzo's trying to get that one too. Oh, Lauren Manzo. Are we going to go there? Let's go there. Let's talk Lauren. I fucking hate her. Well, first of all, we have to give a little backstory to people

who've never listened. Matt just lost a lot of weight and he's thin now. So he has a natural hatred for anybody who eats. And she likes to eat. That's kind of true. And I mean when they did order that pizza two weeks ago, I almost smashed my face through the TV. Me too. And I'm not even on your crazy diet.

I wanted to eat it. God, I'm going to have pizza tonight. I've decided. Oh, I hate you. Stop talking. Ronnie, do you want to get pizza because I'm getting pizza after this podcast. No, I'm going to have pizza tonight. I've decided I have my dinner. Oh, I hate you. Stop talking. Ronnie, do you want to get pizza? Because I'm getting pizza after this podcast. No, I'm still eating protein, too. I just don't lose weight.

I hate both of you guys. Okay, well, how do we feel about this? Lauren Manzo is, she's gotten the lap band, so she gets to be a lazy dieter, which means she is a cheater and just a spoiled rich bitch. Yes. Well, lap band is...

I think that lap band would be hard to have. Don't you guys? I don't think anybody having elective surgery is necessarily a smart move. Yeah, I agree. Did you see the pictures of her, though? Did you see her... She's definitely lost weight.

You showed pictures to me about six weeks ago and I was like, oh, you go on with your bad self. You're looking a lot better better maybe you're down to like a size 10 and then to find out that she has had had the lap band i'm kind of like that's cheating you know why i think there are other people out there that have gotten lap in and i'm fine with people getting lap band that is not an issue my issue is with this whole fucking season has been dedicated to lauren manzo's dumb ass blubber and i don't care well here's my thing about it's that there's almost like this quiet pact with the

audience that we were going to go on this journey with her and it's gonna be tough but she was gonna do it and she was gonna and we were gonna deal with the emotions power walks with jacqueline and drink black and drink black water she'll make it happen she's gonna make it happen and then it's like nope she could not make it happen but maybe's going to make it happen. And then it's like, nope, she could not make it happen. But maybe that's because her mom was calling her chubba wubs. But I don't know. That's just me thinking. Okay.

Well, speaking of that, I kind of hate Caroline. Discuss. I don't hate Caroline, but she is. Caroline is fucking horrible. And I love that they're really highlighting what a C-word she is this year. She's like, oh, well, I told Teresa I don't want to be friends with her. You know, I don't want to be in the middle of that fight. And then so someone walks away and she's talking to two random extras.

Oh, well, look at Teresa. Her family only wants the best for her. She's horrible. She's a horrible person. Like the woman cannot say anything if it's not negative or mean about Teresa. And I'm also – at this point, I'm convinced that she did some fucked up shit to Dina. Yeah. Oh, you mean that Caroline did something to Dina?

Don't you know the rumor of why they're fighting? I know the rumor, but I feel like she's probably just horrible to her all the time. I don't know. I mean, look, I... They're both... Between Caroline and Teresa, they're both acting like idiots at this moment. Caroline's gotta drop it, but I have

to say, I still have to be... I just can never be on Teresa's side, ever. Like, as much as Caroline's gotta contain it a little bit, but... but you know the thing is also friend divorces are messy and it's hard to just suddenly just be quiet and just move on as if nothing's happened you do have to vent a lot you know no that's true and i mean poor jacklyn i mean i don't know that she's gonna be able to handle this clearly she couldn't even show up to the last season's you know reunion this was just so devastating for her. Whatever.

Jacqueline had a good line, though. Jacqueline had a good line was when something about like that Teresa's coming will be due for like billions of dollars. She goes, well, she's going to need it for the $11 million of debt she's in. Yeah, that was like the only good dig she's gotten in, what, five seasons? Hey, you know. Jacqueline's just such a fucking idiot. She tells Teresa, I need to keep my distance between you and your family. And then she sees her the very next day and is like, why isn't Teresa looking at me? Why isn't Teresa talking to me?

Should I go talk to Teresa? What should I say to Teresa? You just told her you didn't want to ever talk to her again. You know what? Because she felt bad. And she's the type of girl that she felt bad and she doesn't want it on her that the friendship has gone bad. So she wanted to orchestrate a thing where Teresa is a bitch to her. and so then she'd be like well fine she's a bitch so our friendship is over right she just wants to be able to wash her hands of it and put the blame all on theresa

which the majority of it does belong there but she needs to like she needs to like lock that up so she can move on hey you know who else does that ashley we just got to the core of it it just got real do you know what? Watching this entire episode, the only thing I could think is, god damn, do I want Danielle Staub to walk into that room. Me too. Oh, god. I have a feeling she'll be showing up at the reunion, don't you? I just have a feeling that we have to cross that bridge.

I agree. I agree that Danielle Staub has to come back into the – everything is perfect. You know what? It would be the biggest disaster. that danielle sob has to come back into the everything is perfect you know what if she is disaster if she shows up on the same episode as dina i mean my head might explode it would be too delicious like if danielle sob shows up everyone would be running around with a chicken like a chicken with their heads cut off because it you know it's very easy to have like team team uh teresa versus team everyone else but then when you have like a third person that everyone hates

and it's like no one knows who to ally with. No one knows what to do. It's chaos. They're going to throw a chair. They're going to throw some tomato sauce. They're going to throw some black water. I'm team Teresa, so whatever. Okay, Ronnie.

Enough. Enough of you. I'm staying with team Teresa. Anyone who can say ingredients isn't coming has my love forever i will never ever and who has a cookbook yes anyone who doesn't know how to cook but has a cookbook a best-selling is my hero yeah i just got a text yay i'm number one on the new york times best selling so so where do we see this going? Like, is the rest of this season, which, you know, we're more than halfway through,

do we just think it's going to be about Jacqueline and Teresa going at it like cats for the next few weeks? Like, what else is there to do? Yeah, that sounds like a lot. Well, now she has to be friends with Melissa for a couple weeks, so that can blow up, because we know that that blows up

at the Posh fashion show. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's going to be amazing. Oh, I forgot about that. And Melissa is sending tweets like that Teresa is still an asshole. So apparently it didn't really work out with anybody. There's not even – why even wonder where it's going to go? Because it always goes into a great place. I'm not even concerned.

There's so much – these people are all so bonkers, and they have so many weird issues. You just sit back and let the cards fall. You know what? I'm not concerned. I'm not concerned for jersey to be honest because it's it really has been a strong season oc went out on a bang and we still have two at least two episodes of reunion special which are guaranteed to be amazing um the only fear i have is for for new york to be honest with you because i will also say this the ratings haveed. It is only now pulling in half of what Jersey pulls in. Oof.

Well, it's pretty terrible. I mean, it's not very good this year. You know, it'll be interesting. They made a big mistake by getting rid of too many people. They did. I think that it would have been okay if they got new people all, but having Ramona and Luann pulling the same crap when you've got all these fresh faces. I mean, I was, I feel weird saying fresh faces about that cast, but you know what I mean?

I mean, I think we can all agree that, you know, Cindy Barshop going away, not that big of a loss. Maybe even KKB, a.k.a. Kelly Ben Simone, Kelly Killaren Ben Simone leaving, not a problem. But no crazy Alex and Simon and no Jill and Ginger. I mean that is a serious problem, and the ratings are tanking as a result. Yeah. Yeah. Well, maybe Jill's boycott is working. Maybe it is.

And you know what? As much as we love Carol – What? You guys are crazy. As much as we love Carol, the new women are not – they're not good enough yet. Not yet. Not yet. Okay.

So we are – we're running out of time, so let's get to some Twitter questions. Okay. So Pazampogna asks – You didn't butcher that at all. Well, it's P-A-Z-A-M-P-O-G-N-A. So Pazampogna. So ethnic. God, all these ethnics.

He asks, we sort of addressed this already, but he said, who, if any of the OC, you would cut from the cast now that it's done, save for the reunion? So I said Gretchen I would cut. Ronnie, you're sticking with Alexis, right? Well, I think she's hilarious, but I think if someone gets cut, it's going to be Alexis, yeah. And I think it should be Heather. But who would you cut, Ronnie? Oh, who would I cut?

Yeah. I would cut – I can't do that. I think I would cut Gretchen because I just can't stand her fake Slade craziness. Yeah. All right. So two for Gretchen, one for Heather. All right. The other question I have comes from a woman named Elizabeth.

She actually emailed me. Is that her Twitter handle? No. She's the Elizabeth of Twitter. No. She actually emailed this because she's not on Twitter or whatever. But she sent out actually a lengthy email. But I'll just choose one of her questions, which was basically, is it me or does Vicky look like a blow-up doll when she leaves her mouth agape? I just think Vicky looks like she's blown up in general this season. And that's why, you know, I think wearing that fur coat for the past three episodes has made her look a little extra big. Makes her look like an ostrich, let's be honest. Well, like a chunky ostrich. She looks like a blow-up doll that was left in the sun and is starting to get melted.

Starting to smell like Sonia's toaster oven. Oh, stop! Dead people in frog juice. Formaldehyde and Swiss cheese. What's another one? Is that it? That's all I got.

That's all I got. I only solicited questions like two hours before the podcast. We can make one up. Yeah, let's make one up. Bueller wants to know when everyone else on this podcast will be as handsome as Rondal. Already happened. BBW Raven wants to know,

hey, when can we listen, how can we listen to Watcher Crappens? Well, you can subscribe on iTunes and you can listen on the Sideshow Network. You can come, you can go to TVgasm, you can come to B-Side Blog and

you can follow us on Twitter. I'm at B-Side Blog. Ronnie is at TVgas on Twitter. I'm at B-Side Blog. Ronnie is at TVgasm. Oh, I'm at TVgasm. Yeah. And Matt is at Life on the M-List. Oh, yes. And I want to say, are you finishing up now?

Yeah. Because I want to say something real quick. A couple weeks ago I said if you came to look at a video on TVgasm, I would leave you ringers. I did not do that. I'm a horrible person because I couldn't figure out, I could not figure out how to upload them correctly, but they're up there right now.

I just put up a video recap of the entire season seven of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. So go check that out. And in the post at TVgasm, there are also, I think three or four ringers, one of which is leave Alexis

alone so come download some ringers yeah sounds good and for all of our listeners out there I don't think that we've you know figured out when we're going to do our next episode I know that next week is 4th of July on Wednesday so we kind of have to look at the schedule to see what shows are actually

going to be airing in the coming week but thank you guys all for listening and tweeting us your questions. And thank you to the Sideshow Network for making this happen. And I'd like to thank Academy. And also, we— They like me. They really like me. I'm not saying who, but we have been in some early discussions,

and we might have a housewife on the podcast very soon. So everyone, stay tuned for that. Wait, wait, wait. You have to tease them. You have to tease them a little bit more. Okay. What should I tease them with? It's my mom. Spoiler alert. That that person might be, let's say,

disgruntled. A disgruntled housewife. Someone who has a lot of things to say and I'm sure a lot of people might be interested to hear what she has to say and i'm sure a lot of people are could be interested to hear what they have to what she has to say no i'm saying wow wow no i'm saying i'm saying it's a real deal housewife it's not like it's not like this is not like someone it's not like dana wilkie no it's not like dana wilkie it's not like the uh the lesbian from orange county last season

this is not even it's not even Deshawn from season one of Atlanta. Don't even go there. This is someone who has some clout, okay? Hey, I forgot about Fernanda. Wasn't she going to be on this year? I think Tamara decided that she didn't want her lady parts tickled by another lady, and she was exiled. Besides, she was attracted to the smell of Sonia's toaster oven more. Okay.

exiled. Besides, she was attracted to the smell of Sonia's toaster oven more. Okay. All for tuning in. It's been another great episode, and once we figure out when we're going to tape again, which will probably be this time next week, we'd love for you to tune in, download, check us out on iTunes, follow us on

Twitter, all that jazz. So Ben, Ronnie, it's been great. It's been long. Peace out. All right. Bye, everyone. Burnt popcorn and pickle juice. Hey, Prime members. You can listen to Watch What Crappens ad-free on Amazon Music. Download the Amazon Music app today.

Or you can listen ad-free with Wondery Plus in Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondery.com.