Watch What Crappens - PumpRules: Anti Jaxxers

Episode Date: June 18, 2020

This episode also avail as video on Crappens On Demand http://bit.ly/crappensvideo Jax continues to Jax on the final installment of Vanderpump Rules as we know it. For this week's premium bonus and our video recaps, become a member over at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. **New merch! Isolate and BenRon 2020 Vote Hypocrat designs available at crappensmerch.com **Crappens Live has been postponed until our country is healthy again. Keep up with our live show calendar at at watchwhatcrappens.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music,

or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna laugh, I'm gonna laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I'm gonna laugh, I'm gonna laugh, I'm gonna watch you laugh, I Well hello and welcome to WatchWedCrab and some podcasts for all that crap we'd love to talk about on E.O. Bronx. It's me, Ronnie. Ronnie Caram, hi. And that's been over there, hi, Ben. Hi, how's it going? Good, how are you doing today? Just fabulous. Just fabulous. Well we're here for Evander Prumprulz reunion. Recap it's the final episode of what we know is VanderPump Rules. It will never, ever be like this again. Okay guys. It will never, ever be the same. I mean, who knows if it's even coming back?

I mean, a lot of people are saying, stick a fork in it, it's over. A lot of people are saying it's gonna be fully revamped. Who knows? Who knows what the future has? If I had some of that like spooky slow-mo version of the theme song to play right now, I would. Oh yeah.

Oh yeah. These are the best days of our nights. Walk and slow-mo out of restaurant. Mhmmm. I'm wanting. As Trixi Monaco slowly drowns in a pool. Yes.

Well everybody, here we are with reunion part three. Before we get started, let's shout out some black owned businesses, shall we? First up, I will start. There is Compton Vegan, they're a food delivery service, and their food looks delicious. I'm looking at their Instagram right now. Their Insta is Compton Vegan. Okay. Compton Vegan. Both those words together. Okay. You can also find them at a better plant based future.com. So go check them out Compton

Vegan. Wow. I would order from them, but there is a little too far away. Yeah. Wow, I would order from them, but there it's a little too far away. Yeah, I think that looks a little bit more. This is okay now what you got today. Well one of our one of our all-time favorite listeners, Laura Cummins says, I just want to give you a shout out to a pair of hair geniuses at Salon obsessions in Silver Spring, Maryland. Barry and Kim Connell are amazing.

You keep your edges. there's no wig shifting, and your hair is laid for the gods! Unisex hair at its best. The website is www.salonobsessions.com. So yes, go, go, go there for sure. Get your hair done because, by the way, hair is a major issue right now for some of us during this pandemic.

I think you look adorable, Ben's in a headband, you could see it because we're on crap and it's on demand today. So hi everybody watching. You can see these at patreon.com. Just go to patreon. Look for the on demand section to sign up for that. Ben is wearing a headband today.

His hair is very, very long. I'm very jealous. My hair is long, I was actually gonna try to give it a Brett tendril, because my hair is also very greasy right now because honestly I have not shower today. So my hair is a little greasy and I was like, this is, it's like a, it's almost at like Brett length.

So, I mean, I could try to make a tendril, should I try to make a tendril live on the show here? I'm gonna pull out a piece and drop it down. No, it's not really tendling. It's just really- You're gonna really have to do a twist. Oh, that's really not a good, that's not a good look. Because now it's like, we see that. Yeah, Tendril making is something you have to practice. So you have to watch, you have to watch like a lot of tutorials on YouTube to learn how to groom, like you're supposed to.

I've been watching this lady who tells murder stories. She tells you about murders while she doesn't make up tutorial. It's so good. And she just starts blank-faced. And then she's like, I've been watching this lady who tells murder story she tells you about murder as well. She doesn't make up tutorial It's so good And she just starts blink faced and then she's like well then there was this girl You know she she was so in love with this guy and she collected dolls You might have recognized her from the doll the doll show on TLC and she fell in love with the wrong guy

Let me tell you and then she just you sit there and watch her put on makeup for a good 20 minutes, and she just tells you all about a murder. It is fascinating stuff. Do you ever feel like she's just making up the story? She just go on with it? Oh no, you can Google all that shit. Trust me, I do. Because I'm very late on the fascination with a murder

that everybody's been on for the past decade or so. I mean, I've always raised on that kind of stuff. So I guess I was never that fascinated, but who knew, you just have a lady sitting there putting on makeup and telling it to you in a fun way. I mean, it changed my life. I mean, we've been, I think we've actually been low key on the murder trend for quite a long time.

Someone actually tweeted at us that apparently we had a whole bit about Countess Luan, like Mary angst even Avery from making a murderer back in like episode 300 and something. So I mean, we're that was that's that's like 900 episodes ago on this show. So I mean, we've been on the murder beat for quite a while. Well, speaking of death. Yeah, speaking of death, this entire cast. So speaking of, yeah, I still predict Jack's will murder somebody waiting for that to come true.

Just want to keep that reminder out there in every episode. Also, this speaking of things changing very quickly, this show, I mean, just every week it's something new and crazy. Stasi and those guys, I'll got fired last week. And this week, oh, and then we got a big social shit apology from Vanderpump, Vanderpump, which we'll go into during the show a little bit

because it's like a load of horses. Oh, yeah, I forgot about that. I'm sure you guys have read, but we'll go into that a little bit throughout the show. And then Stasi pulled a Roxy Heart from Chicago and right with things started to go bad. It's like, but I pregnant and everyone feelings about this pregnancy news because on the one hand I'm just so glad that we don't have to watch a pregnancy storyline on this show, but on the other hand I am so furious that we don't get stossy pregnant on the Vanderpump rules only because it would piss Jacks and bring him off so badly because they wanted to be the first ones to have a baby on Vanderpump rules. They've been trying to push that like we just want to off so badly because they wanted to be the first ones to have a baby on Vanderpump Rules.

They've been trying to push that, we just want to start a family because they're rebranding themselves as just like, good Americans, you want a family. And so the fact that like Stasi and Bo beat them to the baby storyline was like, so deeply satisfying to me, just like that. It was anyone that beat them.

I mean, it would have been, the best would have been if honestly it was Tom and Ariana. Not that I want them to have a baby, but like it just would have pissed off Jackson, Britney, so much. Yeah, because Ariana's always had that story of like, people need to stop asking me when I'm gonna have a fucking baby. Yeah, it's a crazy time to not be able to drink. That's for sure. But wow, you know, so things just keep on a change

and now the anti-jax movement. Anti-jaxers. The anti-jaxers are out in full force trying to get rid of jacks, which, oh my god, I hope that happens. Oh, that'd be very exciting. That'd be very exciting. Please get rid of jacks.

Just start over. I think it's actually gonna be a little harder though, because Stasi, like with Stasi and Kristen, all their stuff with Faith, they like talked about it. They were like, it was on her podcast. It was just like full on documented and undeniable. Whereas, now please, please, please correct me if I'm wrong because I just am not fully up on all the stuff. Oh my god.

Like, is there documented stuff? I'm sorry. There's a whole Instagram, like firejacks or cancel jacks or something. I have not been following on this. You can look at all the evidence right there. I mean, it's a lot. Oh, because I know that there was, you know, people, there was the stuff we talked about last week

that there was rumors that Brittany said some racially insensitive at the kind where to put it things about faith but that was just sort of like I'm not saying that she didn't say it but like I That's not like But yeah, Jackson, let me just go through Jackson's Twitter. It's a fucking horror show and a lady from 90 day fiance came out and posted some comments that he had left on her thing. Because he says something like your boyfriend's nose is huge. He needs a nose star or something,

like what you can't say to a person like stupid, jacks idiot. And that was obviously racist, which brings us to our next, that's just one of many, but that is what's bringing us to our next topic, which is Lance Bass. So Lance Bass this week went on his podcast and was like, what, Jacks?

I mean, I mean, we just had what, Jacks. I mean, we knew that he was an asshole, but you know, I called to tell Jacks that I didn't agree with it. And I had seen that 90 day fiancee posted, said, you just can't say that. And he said, what's the big deal with saying people's noses are big? I mean, Jewish people have big noses too. Oh, geez. Oh geez, I didn't know any of this.

I mean, you know. Wow. I've never thought that because it was funny, I'm laughing because it's just such a cluster fuck of Jack. Yeah, that's the thing. Sometimes when someone is such an idiot and you're like, wow, the depths, like, there is a very dark comedy in all this. Like that someone can be such a supreme idiot and so awful.

Like that's actually kind of why we laugh at so many of these shows, because like, how can someone be so terrible? You know also, what I did see as I saw that Lance's husband is named People Call him Turkey, right? Because the last name is like Turkey, or Turkish or some Turk or Turk or people call him Turkey, I think, or maybe like Turkey or Turkish or some Turkey or Turkey or Turkey or people call him Turkey I think or maybe that's a tarzan.

Oh, tarzan? Is it tarzan? Yeah, that's how he was introduced to us. I think they said it's tarzan. His name is tarzan. I don't know. His husband basically tweeted out and was like, listen, we always knew he was an asshole and we were just like really hoping that he wouldn't be an asshole and

And Lance basically said if we're gonna go into business together You have to like not be an asshole. I need to see some real growth And we didn't last didn't even want to officiate the wedding but that jacks and Lisa were begging and begging and begging And since he was already going he's like, okay fine. I'll do it blah blah blah blah blah So that's another another voice He just went on and on because people were giving him shit like why is it okay? You guys were just officiating his wedding and out of savior own ass. You're out there like oh, we don't agree Won't you have a down with jacks? And he's like no, no, we always knew but it we didn't know all this stuff

Which is very at least of hand or pump apology, which is like dear everyone in the world at least of Handepum's apology, which is like, dear everyone in the world, dear poor people. It's me, this is Amanda Pump, sitting on a tiny chandelier, which is inside a bigger chandelier, which is inside an even bigger chandelier. Now listen, it's come to my attention

that people who once worked for me might have done something bad, which I knew nothing about it and had no ideas. Like Lisa, you gave Stasi your lawyers to use against faith. What are you talking about? I'm sure I'll just borrow my lawyers on the way out, darling, for that thing. I know nothing about! Can and I own seven restaurants, where the mail may not be an occasional magic trick, but boom! Oh, I'm replying to you now, but I'm still apologizing.

And here's what I have to say. We have many restaurants with many employees. And there are many, many diverse people there. Some people are white. Some people are a little bit less white and some people have freckles. But the point is this. We have many people of many different colors at our restaurants and what you're seeing is just a fraction of our employees. So what I'm saying is we only want

white people on my show. Pretty right. I mean that's pretty much how I read. Yeah. It was very ridiculous. It was like, well, I only just found out that Jacks is even working in my restaurants. What? Yeah, it was that kind of bullshit apology. So that happened. Not great. Then Lance, you know, a couple days, I don't even know when this interview happened, really. I find out all my news at the best news source Facebook groups, okay He came out and said oh yeah, we've I guess on the same podcast. He said we've gotten rid of jacks

He's no longer part of the company step down, which I'm sure that everybody was really worried about you're just add jacks Or whatever the fun. Yeah, just add Mac businesses. Yeah or whatever the fuck you're saying. Yeah, just add Mac's businesses. Yeah, like, why, everybody was in every pack to go sales. Yeah, but we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales.

But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. But we wasn't in every pack to go sales. comes out on e the next day, e online. And he's like, what? No, I'm still part of the company. I don't know what they're talking about. No, I thought that Jack's used to me. I thought Jack's then said, no, I volunteered to step down because of all the attention. Sorry, I'm trying to fix all my strange Bret Tendrils

that I like summoned by mentioning it. My hair in the back is like fully carrying out. But I thought Jack's then, and Lance Bass was saying something like, we told him he has to go away, and then Jack's, but Jack's take on it was more of like, like a heroic martyr of like, well, with everything going on, I thought I would just step away

because I don't wanna hurt the business at Yada, Yada, Yada, which of course Jack's would give himself that kind of, that kind of edit, if that makes sense. Yes, and no one has asked about beer cheese yet, which is really what I'm trying to know about. The only people who've asked about beer cheese have been us. We are the only two people who asked about the beer cheese, and that was the one question.

When he crashed our show, it's out by Southwest. That was the one question that got him mad. I think I said like, what's going on with the beer cheese? He's like, man, like, why you guys always not trying to get me? People always try to get out. I was like, you said you're making beer cheese and I want to know where the beer cheese is.

He also got mad when we made fun of his hockey. Yeah. Maybe that's what got him mad. Maybe that's what it was, not the beer cheese. Well, the point is this, Jackson's terrible. And by the way, just in case, you know, listen, the end of the rules isn't the only place you have to go to if you want to see a little bit of racism.

You can also go to Blow Deck Med, breaking news from like two hours ago, Peter from Blow Deck Med, you knew that was fire. You knew it. You knew it. He's barely even been in Bravo. He got fired for posting something extraordinarily racist. It's actually horrifying.

I actually, I was like, what did he post? What is idiot post? And I saw it. It actually like, sickened me on his story. So this wasn't even something that was unearthed eight years ago as far as I can tell. It looked like it was something posted to a story. It was so terrible.

It's not even barren repeat. It was a stupid meme that he posted and uh... Just to get to the point. But it's just... Did you see that? And then someone was giving him shit about it on Twitter like, what the fuck dude? Why would you post something like that? And he's like, what? It's a bondage. You know, people of many races are into bondage and it's sexual sexual and trust me I get very sexual with every race.

Oh you fucking pig! It's disgusting. It's just so disgusting. So Bravo basically said we are going to be re-editing the second half of a blow deck med to like minimize his appearance in there. So like on behalf of the editors also, well, mostly the racism is terrible, but then these poor editors now have to like,

fucking work overtime to fix all this shit, though all the storylines are probably gonna mess up because of this dumb ass. And, you know, I'm acting like this is the worst part of this whole thing, but like, fuck you unit, how about that, let's just say that. Yeah, I'm acting like this is the worst part of this whole thing, but like, fuck you, unit. How about that? Let's just say that. Yeah, I'm just disgusting. And there's gonna be a lot of brief flair for sale.

I'll tell you that. They're gonna need a lot of working editors. It's gonna be a lot of brief flair on these shows. Yeah, brief flair. We need that brief flair to come on in. So I think that's like sums up pretty much all the racist and problematic stuff in the Brabo universe for today. God. Unless there's anything else. It actually doesn't even, but you know what? We'll just leave it at there today. Is there more? Are there more people? Oh, because now there's now there's rumors that Brandy from Real House was a Dallas got fired. There's rumors that she got fired. There's rumors that Kelly's gotten fired. She says she doesn't, but we will see.

And then of course, Tamara Barney's like, guess it. I have a helmet. And so we will see and then of course Tamara Barney's like And so we'll see you know, it's it's everybody's on the chopping block at the moment over there It's a it's a blood bath. I mean I got a busy kitchen over there Bravo. I'll tell you that much Yeah, I'll figure out that is fix a Well fix a lot of eggs game. Whoopsies. Well, for now we have, you know, band of controls we've got three band of pump rules, the end of band of pump rules as we know it. So here we are for reunion part three.

Everybody's coming back from peeing at least is doing a makeup and and he's like back from peeing, and Lisa's doing a makeup! And he's like, guys, why is Tom Sandevol not here? We had 20 minutes to pee! Whoa! So, uh, so finally Tom comes back from his pee break. And, um, and, uh, hey, all summer long, Stassi's constant bush to get engaged, almost sent Bo to an early grave.

Get it, cause grave sort of rhymes with engage. If you think about it, there's a long A, grave. He gave himself that proud nod, you know that like proud nod, cock-eyed smile on the nod, like wow, you got the A sound in two words, congratulations. Take a look.

So then we saw a montage of Stasi Nagon Bo for a ring. So really one of the more insufferable Stasi montages we've seen. The best thing about this whole montage was that it's in Zoom format. So we saw so many people's face watching it. And Brittany is just furious. It's hilarious.

Like, all the sudden, Brittany just sitting there like, you know, just so mad, not smiling through all these clips. She mad because Sassy's engagement storyline, like, infringed on her wedding storyline. It's crazy. That way it's crazy, yawn. You know, really got the short shrift was Lala.

Her engagement is like barely acknowledged, except for when she says my fiance but like she's not getting any sort of wedding fiance kind of love from the producers and by the way I say thank you thank you very much. Yeah good you know. So everyone's laughing and I was just like oh my god this is like a cell embarrassing and she's like I will say this she like does her karate chop in the camera I will say this you men or women wanting to get engaged do not make the person wait and do not try to surprise them Okay, I'm like you can karate chop the camera all you want I do not give a fuck about people getting engaged. Okay, stop it. Stop putting it on my television

I'm offended. Yeah, literally do not care. If you are like, if like wanting to get engaged is not a personality, okay? So like, I'm not, I'm like, I don't care if you're like waiting, if you're sitting there waiting for the ring, I'm like, it literally is not, I would rather watch vaginal adjuvenation during an aerial yoga class, while all surrounded by a cryo- Oh for a cryo- Oh for a cryo-jad. Yeah.

Like I literally do not care if the question is not been popped to you yet. Like literally just like tell me when it's happened. I'll be there for the moment. I'm okay if you say I hope we get engaged. I hope it pops the question. And I'm even if you say I hope we get engaged. I hope it pops the question and I'm even I'm even there for you I'm even okay with a storyline that's like Should I stay or leave because what's the point of me putting in if this person's not ready?

But what I don't care about is are you gonna propose are you gonna propose when you propose? Where's my ring? Where's my ring? Where's my ring? propose when you get proposed where's my ring where's my ring where's my ring I literally don't care about any of it. Okay, none of it I don't these are just basic things we all do it's like people who have weak long birthdays You know fuck that fuck you it's like people who are like hey guess what? It's it's quarantine time but my kids graduating from high school So let's all drive around the house for two hours so we can say hi in a fun way that only we're gonna give you your Our germs okay, It's like fuck you. I just want to like pass by with empty-diet coat cans and throw them at the kids like

So then we get like another montage of Stasi and Bo fighting about Getting engaged because like they get the first montage was where's the ring and the second one was are you gonna pop the question and so Andy's asking why Stasi was crying so much that one there was like that one dinner that I we were supposed to care about where they went out to dinner and she thought she didn't get she thought that bow was gonna propose and then he didn't and so she like lost her mind yeah she's like well it's because he had a mic pack in his pocket and it looked just like a ring box. Mic packs do not look like ring boxes, okay? Now you're just seeing things wherever you go.

Yeah, that's just pure lunacy. It's like, then you is rectangular as well. Did you think that was a ring box? Are we just picking any kind of rectangular thing? I went to the supermarket and there was an entire stack of wedding rings. Like those were sardine tins. No, I'm pretty sure they're wedding rings. So then Tom Schwartz is like, oh, so what's sexier? A penis bulge or a ring bulge? It's like, well, Tom, you live at your in Mus Hollywood. You should know that sometimes a ring bulge can be a penis bulge.

Or in Jackson's case, it was. Because he literally kept his ring in his penis, as we saw. So, and he's like, so Christian Carter said that Carter told Bo that he needed to thank you for setting them up. You agree? And she's like, oh my God, no, I don't agree with Carter. Oh, oh, oh.

It's like, he was in every scene after that was you cheering on Carter and being like, yes, Carter, yes. Stop trying to kiss their ass. They don't want to be your friend. Just stop, okay. Exactly. You're pathetic at this point. And Stasi is like, but you were defending him and every interview did up to this moment,

but I do appreciate you saying no right now. So, Kristen's like, oh, I said, was that he was defending me? And like, I don't respect that. And she's like, tries to say something and Lala goes, no, no, just leave it at you, don't support Carter. Just don't, like, you know what Lala? I don't even, I don't even know where I stand

on this stupid issue, but I do know one thing. I don't wanna hear your voice on it. Like, I really don't care what you have to say right now, Lala. I am mad, you know what, Lala? I don't even know where I stand on this stupid issue, but I do know one thing. I don't wanna hear your voice on it. Like, I really don't care what you have to say right now, Lala. I am mad at you. Shut up, lady. I went off about crop tops while she was wearing a crop top dress. Lala, I feel betrayed by you

because you were supposed to be our hero and you've turned into this. Okay, Lala. Lala. We were all rooting for you. So, Annie's like, well, Lisa, you sure had your share of unruly bartenders and defiant waitresses, and by unruly and defiant, I mean, racist.

So, this year was your turn to manage the managers themselves. So, then we see a montage of Max and Danica, etc. And, uh, Andy's like, Lisa, I'm sure you wouldn't continue to employ Max and Danica if they weren't good at their jobs So what makes them good managers? The first of all Andy, I just want to say I only just found out we had managers and if I'd realized this I wouldn't find them a long time ago. I had no idea there was a thing called sexual harassment and it blew my mind when I heard him out of Andy. I want to assure every dog in the world.

I will not let one of my managers try and stick his dinky inside of you. Thank you and me. Well, I thought Danico was the name of our new Blender. I thought it was a brand name so when they said, Danico's acting up, I said, get a new Blender. We can't go another night without our pureed beets soup. And then she, uh, but for real guys, she's like, what the thing that makes Max special is that he puts in so many hours. Now, would I prefer that he wasn't banging the staff of course But with Danica the thing is she needs to grow up and soft and up she just gets so black and white

And then she just gets it wrong over there, you know, I mean You're yelling at Danica max is the one fucking everybody in your restaurant and cause a girl. How is that okay? Yeah, it is you don't have a central HR unit there, but Mm-hmm. No, it's totally fucked up because first of all when she's like well He's the reason why he's such a good manager is because he puts in so many hours And he's also a great bartender who can step in whenever wow. I I wonder, like, uh, those rare skills in LA, oh, is Max the only one who is capable of putting in hours and mixing a drink? It just feels like such a cop out. She's with the staff, loves him. Okay, I'll give a little bit of that, but unfortunately, it seemed like the staff is, like, also sleep to them. And by the staff sleep to them, it's more like he sleeps to the staff. And when she's like, now do I wish he wouldn't sleep with the staff?

Yes. I'm like, you are the boss. You say do not sleep with the staff. It's as simple as that. You write a memo and say, there shall be no sleeping with the staff. These are your employees. And you are opening us up to liabilities

by sleeping with the staff. Let alone the fact that it's also just like fucked up. I mean, that is basically sexual harassment. Even, well, that's even with two consenting adults, it's just, it's fucked up because that's a workplace and it always ends badly. Yeah, and then this show, it's a little weirder because everybody fucks each other on this show. That's what the show is about, but they're not working with each other. Now, I guess you could make the argument that Peter is hooked up with people before or whatever, but... I mean, the thing is this. It's sort of a, it's sort of also an unfair question in a weird

way. It asks Lisa because basically Max is there, not because he's a great man or he's there because he's a character on the show and he's a sweetest with everyone. And so it's basically a soap opera, right? And so, but so now Lisa has to pretend because he's a character on the show and he's a teacher with everyone. And so it's basically a soap opera, right? And so now Lisa has to pretend like there's a real administrative reason why he's there, which is like, you know she probably is like, because he's, people find him good looking

and then he sleeps with people and creates drama. Like that's really what the answer is. Yeah, but she's like getting on him. She's like getting on him and, you know, okay, the reason is like getting on him. She's like getting on him. And, you know, okay, the reason is, like, he causes drama and he's supposed to do that. But then it's a problem with Danica, you know, like she attacks.

Totally. Every time it's a problem with the guy, she attacks the woman, you know, and we're used to seeing that sadly enough for men all the time. Yeah. But when it's the woman, it's like, come on Lisa, like every single time you're gonna take the guys side,

every single time this whole Fucking well episode Yeah, no exactly. I mean the issue with Danica is that she she messed up in order with that table one time And she pushed Brett Willis she put her hands on Brett Willis and Basically, she said that that Brett and Lisa Vannapur had bots for each other So that's really the problem for Lisa. Well, yeah, that's where she goes next. She's like, because Rickel sticks up first. She's like, yeah, but Danica's also the best manager in the world. She knows table numbers.

And Lisa's like, well, listen, I think she's been downright rude. And look, I hate to make this personal, but I do have a personal issue when she's going on national Television saying I'm having an affair with bread now that pisses me off You're the one joking about fucking Brett in every episode that you see him You're the one you think that the joke that he's so hot and you want to fuck Brett and he wants to fuck you What are you even talking about? So then we see the clip of Danica doing this on the after show and she did not say that they were

funny. She did not say they were having a fair. She said like she's grossed out by the fact that they were trying to do this like mother, son kind of thing because they're both hot and they both probably fantasize about each other, which is a very different thing. It's actually sort of like a cheeky comment, a sort of cheeky comment that Lisa Vanderbilt makes,

left and right about everyone and everything under the sun. But it clearly hit a nerve, by the way, because Lisa has never been this bothered by her bias. She's like, I have children, I have a husband, I have Boofy, Sloofy, Jiki, Diamonds, Rosé, Hinky, Pinky, Cotton, Corn, Melissa, Ball ballerina raccoons were very hurt by what you've ever been to me. I also have Richard Sin. That is a reference to someone who is not why too is sort of on the show a little bit once every three seasons.

So Kristen's like, oh, I'm down to go. Oh, you're lucky that you have a job because all I did was tell one manager to suck it in. Oh. Oh. Oh! Oh! Oh! By the way, I'm just like imagining right now. I just had this like vision of Pandora watching Danica's interview and being like, Mommy, are you having an affair with Brett Mommy?

Mommy! Just like in a little cloak, a little lantern coming into the room with a lantern through the fog. Mommy, I had something to have their money Pandora she's like yeah, all I did was tell one manager to suck a dick and then jacks is based You know jacks is trying to pipe in like I got married And then because like um Lisa, I'm like sorry like that a minute you but like obviously I know that you're not like fucking brat But like sorry if that came out the wrong way, I guess. Um, also my nose my nose holes are completely collapsing during the course of this

Uh, because someone told me Well, it definitely came out the wrong way or nose holes are like this by this point that we are They're like completely collapsed, okay? This is why people start injecting things. How are you even breathing right now? The structural integrity of our nostrils has come under review. So, so Lisa's, Lisa's like, well it definitely came out the wrong way. Thank you very much.

I've been married for 37 years. I have two children. Well, one really, another, that's a bus boy, who I took under my wing. And then there's also said Dreck who is my child at one point But anyway, I don't need to hear that I have Oofy, sploofy, jiggy, wiggy, diamonds, rosé Teddy melon cap, oh wait, she betrayed me It's time for commercial. It's time for-

Celebrity Beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife. And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the host of Wonder E's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity few, from the buildup, why it happened, and the repercussions. What deserve session with these feuds say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin

and Haley Bieber. A seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows? It's snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wonder-Yap.

All right, crap ends commercial. Watch what crap ends would like to think it's premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King. Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney. She's not just a Sheila, she's a Daniela. Itch-o-s. Let's rent some errands with Emily Erions. Aaron McNickles, she don't miss no trickle-us.

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Let's give them a kisser, it's Austin and Marissa! Somebody get us ten C's of Betsy MD! We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva! Oops, she did it again! It's Brittany Montana! Simple as rocket science, it's Dana Eazy! We will, we will, Joanna Rockland, you! Again, it's Brittany Montana. Simplest rocket science, it's Dana Eazy. We will, we will, Joanna Rockland you. The incredible edible Matthewsisters.

The Windom beneath our wings, it's Joe Windom. Let's go on a bender with Lauren Fender. She's Ferrelio, it's Lindsay Ferrelio. Give him hell, Miss Noel. It's a frog's ass water tie, it's Rosen Sadie. Shannon, out of a cannon Anthony. Let's get racing with Miss Stacy. Let's take off with Tamla playing She ain't no shrinking violet coup d'art. We love you guys. So So then Andy's like max is banning someone from talking shit

Something that a general general manager should really be focused on. And Max is like, no, I can agree that was a really reactive moment. And I handled it incorrectly. And I apologize to Lisa and Tom. And to make it up to them, I had sex with three more waitresses just to show how invested I am in the business. Yeah, he answers in such a guy from Vanderpump rules way. He's like, well, I apologize Lisa and Tom.

But like, I just felt back sad because I didn't know why you didn't like me. All of a sudden, you're always hooking me up with your friends. I was like, who? What exit sign are you looking at right now? There's literally nobody in your house, dude. Who's following me? He's just looking around. He's looking around like.

He's just, yeah. Yeah, that's why he was mad at Danica. He's like, you know what, you were like hooking me up with your friends. I just felt, I felt backstabbed. Brett and Max do a really good job of just painting themselves as these poor guys who've just been the victim of women.

Cause Danica's like, um, yeah, no, I'm like, I'm like annoyed because what happens is you fuck these girls and then I'm working with them And then they are like complaining the entire time and like it's like annoying, you know And he's like, um, but I still talk to them this to this day Well, I mean not so much talk to them, but we like follow each other on Instagram Which is like the same as talking so I don't see your point Yeah, she's like

Well, yeah, she says all that and he's like well, that that's not true. And like, you're the one who like hooks me up with girls and then like, you get mad at me. And like, it's like you go into the bar and then getting me a shot and be like, Brett, you want a shot and then I take the shot and then you call me an alcoholic because I took the shot. I was like, guess what?

If you were an alcoholic and you took the shot that somebody offered you, you're still an alcoholic. Like, you're not magically not an alcoholic for that shot. Yeah Exactly, it's called use some judgment like you can have standards for yourself You can say you know that this is probably not a good idea for me to sleep with this girl because there are a million girls in Los Angeles a million outside of Sir and the whole Vanderpump empire and I think you know who's been standing up for Jackson's whole time So I guess we shouldn't really be surprised by this answer. She goes um

Danica do you have a problem because like I think that you want to fuck Max and that's all I hear from you right now is it you want to fuck I'm like Oh to be fair. I also hear a bird version of Morris's sem Seminole hit, the more you ignore me. Co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co-co- Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, Kaka kaka kaka kaka kaka kaka kaka kaka kaka kaka kaka kaka kaka kaka kaka kaka Hey, no poster Makaka Makaka A little bit of kaka on the side A little bit of kaka on my mind A little bit of kaka

Is everyone still listening to me? Kaka on number five So the dogs are barking, of course, because it's Jackson Brittney. He were just morons and don't know how to put their dogs in a bathroom like everybody else, okay? Yeah, and so Jackson's like, you guys chill and Bob goes, guys, why don't you just lock the dogs in a room and Brittney's like, WAKE IT HERE YOU! Oh god, they are like, this was actually the thing that may have pissed me off the most about them over the over all three episodes was their Indignant like behavior attitude over the handling the dogs because clearly they've all been told to get

To like to put their take care of their dogs and the fact that they won't and that they are like now mad other people I'm like this represents everything wrong with them. So Brittany's like, yeah, we can hear you and Jack says It's just gonna happen when you have dogs. It's just gonna happen. Like, put your dogs in a cage, in a room, anywhere in a basement, not in the car, but somewhere. Yeah, and check, they're a commitment. They are a commitment. It's like if you start to McDonald's monopoly board,

you just have to get a supersize every day. What are you gonna do? Just let your, let your board die. Well, well and then Brittany goes I don't understand what this much goes well the equipment is going bad the equipment's going bad what I don't know and sausage like well listen we do have dogs okay and we're supposed to get a babysitter it's like well there's also a pandemic going on and I don't want my dog and people laughing and trying to like like, yeah, people just don't want dogs in their houses.

Oh, please. I feel like Jack's the first person. I bet if you go through Jack's social media, I'm sure he has tweets about, let's open up this country. Let's open up this country. He'd be the first one to use an excuse to go and find, did he actually have a tweet that was like, oh, after he was trying to be all BLM for like two days or whatever he's doing, he had a tweet that was like, He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. He did. I'd love to fight about your dogs some more, but I'd really love to pivot to slush a machine now Okay, cuz that's really fun. All right, let's watch this music video James. You're no stranger to terrible YouTube

YouTube Produced music videos, so what do you think about that? He's like um well honestly and I thought it was pretty wrong She and it was pretty wrong. She and me. I don't know. It was a bit much, I didn't. You know, I really needed, Andy. I really needed more blue paint being thrown on her face. OK. How about just like big streams of paint, just falling on her body?

That's how you do a music video, Andy. I know James fucking James over there shooting music videos with Lala. That's going to tell us what's going to happen. It's too much. So Andy's like, um, and Brett, you said that she invited you. Let's go with the Shishu too again, because that was that was a fun discussion.

And he's like, okay, I get it. That was dramatic, but it's what I actually meant to say was, and she cut some off and she's like, but you don't know what I mean, I'm gonna get some. Because if you don't want to do something, you should explain it. Are guys stopping such a bastard corner? No, probably, admittedly, probably not the best tactic to take. I think one thing that we're learning is that we're not blaming the quote unquote victims. Right. We're not saying you should have spoken up as much as a victim.

I'm not even gonna say that like, I'm not saying that bread is a victim, but I'm just saying that, I'm not saying that Brett is a victim, but I'm just saying that's not Sheena's correct take. I think Sheena should just, I think she should just lean in to the fact that Brett is too big, because he is fully two-faced. And Jack's is like, he's like, I came downstairs and I heard something

about a blowjob that like, she offered a blowjob and he said, no, I was like, who does that? Who does that? I mean, whenever I go, whenever I go to Orange Theory, I mean like who does that who does that I mean whenever I go whenever I go to orange theory I mean like I I know I mean I never get blow jobs at the gym never ever ever so anyway go on next question Yeah, because Jackson's thing is that he never watches the show which is such a lie because you know that he watches that shit like 20 times in episode

Yeah, or 20 but he watches every episode 20 times so anyway, she was like Yeah, or 20 up but he watches every episode 20 times. So anyway, she was like It was a joke, okay? Lala makes those jokes like what she's really gonna give a blowjob for a Range Rover. Yes Yes, she's given so many fucking blowjob. She's in a mansion right now in the hills. Yes Yes, he really gave a blowjob for a Range Rover that wasn't a joke. This is not a good argument Yeah, this is do you see where she is broadcasting from? Okay, do you see it? Okay, this is not the argument you want to use Lala as a corroborating witness in, okay, she never.

Yeah, never, never try to emulate Lala's behavior. Okay, let's have about that, you know? She's like, well, so I was just like trying to be funny. I'm thinking like, how am I going to pay you? Blow jobs or money, okay? Like a girlfriend status or money, or like, I don't know, like maybe we'll get married sometime because we sort of have a connection or money.

You know, something like that. But Sina, you did like bread, and you thought that was a possibility you could get to get on. She's like, wow, I mean, look, I'm just saying that we like clipped right away. I like sure, they all like, and then we see a clip of Sina starting to cry where she's like,

but Vanderbomb, I don't want to need him. I really don't, I don't need the proof. I just like, I mean, like sure, he's nice. And everything I really like, I's like, but matter, I don't want to make him. I really don't I'm telling you the truth Like I just I mean like sure he's nice and everything I really like him like he's great I'm not a horse of the stable like I adopted a horse and like named a brat I'm like seriously like I don't like She's like you know, I generally just like wanted him to be like a friend and like I'm like a floating person when I'm single And like anyone who knows me knows that and like I'm also like very good at comedy And so like like one of my favorite bits is to be like, um do you want a blowjob or

Chippin your money for something which is like a classic comedy bit so like it's just like a lot It's just like a lot right now and breath's just like Yeah, she know oh Yeah, the camera winking at himself and Andy asks Charlie. He's like so Charlie You would just turned off so quickly on your date with bread well that about and she's like and Jacks goes oh cuz he doesn't belong to sugar daddy dot com that's why you're the one who's friends blah blah you're the one who's like rumored to literally have been a horror jacks like give me a break I like are you seriously gonna come after somebody yeah and so

Charlie's basically like I just felt like weird because like, the whole shit, I knew about the Shina situation. She knows like one of the few people who was like nice to me. So like, when I like went on that day with Brad, I'm just like, it's too much. So I just like took myself out of that situation. Yeah, and he starts shit talking Shina. Like that's what Brett did on that day.

All he wanted to do was like try and get Shina in trouble. He always does that. So Brett's like, well, this is what, and then the line of Brett saying, this is why I can't have friends that are girls, because you guys like you just take this, you take things to another level. Okay. You know, I realize that Brett shares a lot of mental DNA with Carl from Summer House. Like that, like that, very like trying to frame himself as this nice guy who's just being honest And sort of like the victim to these crazy women who toy with his heart and emotions when he just is trying to bear his soul to them

You know, he's like trying to get people like he flirts with people to try and get them to like him And then he acts like they're crazy for like he's ass-living them basically as he's trying to make crazy with that Yes, that is that is an he's ass-living them basically. As you're trying to make them crazy with that. Yes, that is an amazing term, ass-living. So Charlie and Charlie go, you can just go home and write in your diary then, whatever. I mean, Charlie is amazing. So then, so where are she and Brett now?

Well, until I saw the last three episodes, he said, and I quote, I'm gonna be so far up your ass, you're not the reason to apologize, that you're gonna be so happy, like when I take back everything I said, so I'm just sort of like sitting here still waiting, like I don't know,

do I have to give him like a blowjob or something for him to say that, that was a joke. That was a joke. So he laughs, he's like, ha ha ha, he laughs in a way like, oh, Sina, you're so foolish, but then he goes, ha ha ha, yes, I did say that because in the moment, I felt that, but you know, like it doesn't,

just because I'm not saying that now, it doesn't mean that I felt that way in the moment, and Mala just goes clowns, all clowns. All, all, all, all. She's not necessarily wrong, but the fact that she indeed herself looks like a circus clown at this moment doesn't help. But she like, just because of the fillers,

it's not trying to, not trying to genetic shame her, just the fillers. She has clown fillers. If clowns were, if clowns were to get fillers, if clowns were to get fillers, they would look like that. They're getting bigger by the second. I'm telling you, they're growing during this reunion. By the end, she's gonna have like two clown feet.

You know those like big red feet. She's gonna be sending red balloons to all these people in the cast and one should be careful so imagine where's like you look down on a storm gutter and there's Lala hey she's you just to ruin your life with a new endo like change this whole movie really it really does so um Brett is like oh she you know okay I'm sorry for making you think that I wanted something, even when I made it as clear as possible to anyone who would listen that I didn't. Which is not a point of this, Brett. It's not how bad he's still, he's making every article like, I'm sorry you're so in love with me, okay? Yeah, I'm sorry that I misled you, even though any idiot could tell I was being perfectly clear and not misleading you.

I'm like, so you're not apologizing. And you're framing yourself to somehow be this guy who's so valiant and noble, who people can't help but like misunderstand. When you did say to her, you were gonna apologize left and right, and now you're walking it back, but somehow just saying like, you're walking it back, but somehow

Just saying like it's like sorry I'm apologizing for misleading and not apologizing for being dishonest Yes, and she's like but yours the thing I want you to apologize for is you're saying one thing to my face And then behind my back you're saying all this other stuff and he's like oh, okay Well look, I'm sorry if I gave you the wrong impression and you lived to only fuck me, okay? I'm sorry that I'm that hot. I'm sorry you were so dick-matized, you know? And he also says, you're so defensive about it, which is like major ass lighting right there.

Yeah, so Ariana, who's still the drunk queen on a bar with a martini, you know, like hosting Kelly about. I really love this episode of that. So I've lived that life. She's like, oh really? Well listen, it's not sorry for the wrong impression. Say sorry for saying one thing to her face You know like hosting carry on tear the sex I've lived that life. She's like oh really well listen It's not sorry for the wrong impression say sorry for say one thing to her face and it's something else behind her back And he's like, but I don't believe I did that are you on it? She is all right, then you're not gonna apologize

And that's that all right Yeah Bam Ariana I apologize I apologize that she and Miss led you to believe that I was being too faced. So, you know, even though I clearly wasn't being that way. Yeah. So then we ask Ariana about her depression and she's like, I'm going to therapy but yeah, still sucks, depression sucks. And then it cuts to Kristen's face and she's doing

prayer hands over. Yes, I noticed that too. She's like supporting her hand over, she's putting her chin over her hand emoji, pray hand emoji. Seriously? She's like, I'm feeling for your depression. Also, hashtag blessed, okay? Actually, the real news here is that I caught a fly between my hands and I'm just waiting for the right moment to let it free so you guys can all see it as a moment of my blossoming personality. And, click all the flies free. So next up, Andy is like, wow, Britain jacks might have had a fairy tale wedding. But when they came home,

she realized Jack's left all his fairy tale persona back at Virsales. You heard that right. Virsales. Ouch. Ouch, wow, that's an embarrassing name for a castle. I'll just mention it in Burr Sales. You got married in a fake castle with a mispronounce name.

So, what do we do from here? In the clips of Jack's just being a fucking monster, rage-texing everybody, you know, Slush Amy Kristen for having a sex video and trying to bring that on camera when he's the Innocent one is like how could you try and make me look bad on camera? I mean just hypocrite HIPAAKRIT shot after hypocrite shot of jacks basically. Yeah, we get the shot that was my favorite of Britney's through the season because I've just wanted her to admit this

This entire time when she said while I'm married and no one he was that person so now I have to deal with it That's right. You fucking do and I hope you just listen to that clip over and over, because the feeling sorry if you ain't gonna happen. Sister. Yeah. And during this entire montage of Jack's just being terrible, you know, Brittany is trying to, there's like, she's just laughing like, oh crazy, look at all those antics of Jack's. Well, America's sweet birth couple. Well, well, look at them. Wow, oh my goodness, gracious.

You're cool guy. You're cool guy. You're cool guy. So she's like, and then the clip of him being like, you know my brain, it's like sprained. Like I've got a sprained brain. Okay, like I have mental problems. Like you can't be mean to people with mental problems.

Like how am I supposed to stay with my wife when I'm just going crazy? Well, I'm just going crazy. Well, I'm just going crazy. And it comes back and bring it goes, shoo! Woo! Shoo! And Andy goes,

Jack, you seem to spiral at the end of every summer. And he's like, well, I'm good now, I'm good now. You know, the downfall at the end of the summer, is Andy, it's just because, you know, like I'm incredibly working on myself, Andy. And he's like, yeah, how are you working on yourself? And he goes, well, you know, like, I work on it, you know, like, Wings help and Coke and random holes in the general vicinity of the gym.

That, you know, things help. I'm working on it. Yeah. Yeah. Just trying to be a better person. That's all. Just trying to be a better person, which is like, so like, big, like, unspecific, just try to be a better person, which is so big, like, unspecific, just easy,

retort to throw at someone to deflect away. And Ariana's like, um, can we move on to a different subject so we don't spend the last 45 minutes to this reunion on this stupid thing? And Britney's like, don't play with me! Yeah, don't play with me!

Seriously, seriously! Even though Jack, and then of course, the other thing that happens a lot is that Brittany will start saying something and then Jacks like jumps on, so she'll be like, don't be rude. Yeah, don't be rude. Don't be rude.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, don't be rude. Don't be rude. Yeah, there that's a terrible couple at a kid sports game. There's always that terrible couple who's like booing the other team. I'm like, you can't pop stuff up, yeah, you can pop that up. No, they're the couple where like the rules don't apply

to them, which is why their dogs were out where everyone else in the cast. This cast has like a million dogs. By the way, in case you didn't notice, Lisa Vanderpump literally has like the entire population of Idaho's dogs in her living room. And she even she found ways, well, she's rich, so she could still more pretty easily.

I mean, somewhere, what's Rosio is like in the basement with a sea of dogs, just trying to keep them all quiet. But the point is this, everyone found a way to keep their dogs quiet, except for them, right? It's like, oh, well, we just can't. You know, the rules don't apply to them and it's probably Jack's leading that charge

and then Brittany just is like a blind defender to his bad behavior, despite what she says. There's a lot of sugar in my beef dogs, I love it. I am so trickered. No, because I get really triggered by sanctimonious dog owners. I'm sorry everyone, but we all know it doesn't mean that dogs are bad,

it doesn't mean that dog owners are bad. I'm saying sanctimonious dog owners. The ones who are like, well, I know my dog is good, so it doesn't have to be out of leash. I know my dog would never do this. It's not a problem. I've told the story many times, many, many times, that one time I went to a dinner party and the sky was talking about his dog. And I just asked theoretically, like, because I was curious if your dog ever attacked someone, what would, what would happen? He was, well, my dog would never attack anyone. I was like, no, I'm just saying like theoretically, what would you have to do? And he goes, was well my dog would never attack anyone I was like no I'm just saying like theoretically what would you have to do and he goes well my dog wouldn't attack anyone

So it's not even an issue is like well what sort of dog do goes he goes half pit bull half wolf and I was like you know I'm done. I'm done. I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna deal with this So that's what they they remind me of that like that of Of people who think the rules don't apply to them and then get mad at everyone else For being like annoyed at them. Well, it makes you feel better. People like that get a lot better when they have children.

Children? Oh, well, that's true. I mean, we all know that children fix everything. Yeah, they fix everything, guys. Yeah. Look at my parents. They're just thrilled to be alive and together. So anyway, Arianna's like, yeah, this is the same shit.

I'm carrying on. It's just in a different place today. I'm just swirling up, you know, Martini in my mind. This is just the same shit as every other reunion. Like, oh, work in progress, work in progress. Blah, blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah. And then we get some good brieflyer here.

I don't know, whichever editor did this? If free, if this was your parting gift to Van Opom for Rules, God bless, because then we get a montage of every single Van Opom for Rules reunion of Jack's declaring that he's a work in progress. Every single one, so good. And Jack's is so mad with that clip, is shown. He's like, well, look, I'm gonna be a work in progress

to rest my life, all right? Like, what do you want? I'm a work in progress, okay? Cause I'm not perfect. And Tom's like, well, look, I'm gonna be a working progress to rest her my life, all right? Like, what do you want? I'm a working progress, okay? Cause I'm not perfect. And Tom's like, yeah, well, but you literally contradict yourself. I'd like to show you how much in this trumpet cell, I was like, Tom, put down the trumpet.

God. I will tell you how much you contradict yourself right after I'm done going to bathroom by. So, Jackson's like listen I was around with you guys didn't get along I mean come on come on Tom your friends would come to my house from St. Louis and stay with me because you guys didn't get along and he's like well it's like not true he's like yeah a crystal vouch for me you know the one I called the compulsive liar in the clip we just watched show me my witness she's my character witness you

know the one that I's about having sex with me for months and months and months? Seriously. She'll vouch for me. Seriously, then Ariana gets out of her chair and she's like, Jack's father, Jack's father,

Jack's father, she starts talking to the Dan. She's like, I'm drunk, I don't care. Jack's father, fuck you, fuck you, you're cool, Rickale, fuck you. Yeah, so you, you're cool, Rickale, fuck you.

Yeah, so you wanna have a real conversation because you're acting like a child, congrats, good for you. Oh, suddenly, I am like so angry right now. Like, I am just like at level 14 out of 10, pretty much cause the dog shit. So when Britney starts talking about, she's like, you're acting like a child, you're acting like a child. I'll tell you who's acting like a child your husband at all times

Okay, and I don't care when she says I know I have to take up my husband, but I yell in my scenes. I'm like The mount I don't believe it. I do not believe it I believe you do some token yelling so we can say that you yell But I do the way that Brittany yells at the other people, but really gives a pass to Jacks. I just, nope, nope, nope. Yeah, I don't care if you yell at him behind the scenes. Who cares?

I don't, he's an asshole period. The fact that you tied yourself to that is you did this yourself. Daddy issues. So then Tom is like, you say you wanna be be a matter of person, but then you start tweeting and tweeting. All these fucking lies, lies, lies.

And everybody's cracking up because Jackson's no like the stand on in this, you know? And Ariana's still like, you still want the last topic of the reunion to be around Jackson. He's like, oh, because you two are so awesome. You're just so, you're so perfect. You never made me so perfect. You're so perfect. You're just so all you're so perfect. You never made me so perfect

You're so perfect. You're so perfect And Ariana goes I'm garbage and she starts yelling in the camera and clapping at them She's like I'm a garbage person. That's why I'm on this show It's kind of the one of the most brutally honest moments in the history of Bravo. Yeah So you want to talk about how I'm garbage or do you want to talk about yourself being garbage? That's fine, but I don't want to hear this hero shit, you know, and he's like oh, well this wasn't about you area I got married I'm very now So awful. So, uh, hey, Jacks, why were you so pissed

at Max's beach cleanup day? And Jacks, like, you know what? I just, Andy, I woke up and I just wasn't, I was just like in a bad mood and I just didn't feel like driving to Malibu when there are three parks right here that are full of trash, full of trash. I'm like, just say you didn't want to go, which is actually, he does ultimately say that I will give a Reluctant props to jacks. He's like basically I didn't want to go which I think is totally fair

But um, but he's like but there's trash it look 25 cars to save the world I mean these parks are full of trash. I'm like, okay, don't act like you have some alternate environmental cause to go along with it You didn't want to go you want to stay home and jerk off and play with Kingsley. Yeah, stuff like that. Everybody's giving him shit about that. Like, come on, Jackson Britt. He's like, what, he's saying the truth. And Chris, you guys don't say it's for the environment.

I mean, give me a break. And Britt goes, well, I went and I had a good time to love fan depth, blah, blah, blah. And she starts like going off on them, but Jackson doesn't let her. He's like, it wasn't about him. It wasn't even about Max. Look, I apologize.

This time I apologize like five hours after it happened, which is like a record for me to like give a fake apology out. I mean, you see, it takes like until the reunion. So you're welcome. You're welcome. And then they cut to footage of like five hours afterwards and just him rage texting everyone again. Like, fine, don't come to my party.

You're all disinvited. You're all disinvited. You're all disinvited Did they even get into did they even get did there even even touch on the rival parties pool parties? I don't think it did no Oh, yeah, yeah, it did it in a couple weeks ago. Yeah, oh, I can't even remember and did they even oh, and it talked a little bit about that Police prank, but yeah anyway, so jacks jacks. This is so jacks He's like listen listen. I, I mean, come on. I'm very good at apologizing. I'm always apologizing.

Like I'm really good at it. And Andy's like, oh, I don't think you're really good at apologizing because I've seen you apologize over and over again. It reunites and not mean it. And he goes, well, I meant it this time. The way you think about it. And he just gives Andy that evil.

Like I'm gonna spank you if you don't put down the god Them box of 3d pebbles in the store and he said no Andy Yeah, and Jackson's like I'm an Andy I mean that haven't you just like apologize to people and just like not meant it just to get by and he's like Not really well, isn't that Jack summed up in one small question. I mean there you go everybody He's like, but Jack's changed. Yeah, and how could he say, well, this apology I really meant. And then say, haven't you ever just apologized just so you can move on? Okay, so yeah. So he's like, come on, Andy, I don't believe that. And then Brittany's like, you know,

points, things guy. I don't know what I wrote there. I don't know that. He's cool. That means. When in doubt, just say, he's a cool guy. He's cool guy. You know what, Andy?

I know right now he looks like them like to apologize, but maybe put some sunglasses on you. You're real cool. Okay. So Andy has one of his best questions of all time because Britney, is it to realize you'll have to apologize for Jackson's behavior for the rest of your life And she's like yeah, it's hard listen you can't unsolver the first free-done a free-dope I am He's already a soggy free-dope, and he's gonna be tough and Jackson's like listen

Why are you pitching holding me to be the rest of my life? I mean, come on, no one's perfect. No one's perfect. He loves doing that deflection. By the way, it doesn't even make sense. Why are you pitching holding me to be the rest of my life? Ha, ha, ha. I don't think that's the proper use of pitching holes. And I'm also afraid of all the pigeons

whose holes you're gonna try to find. So Andy's like, listen, I'm not trying to be an asshole, but this is our eighth reunion and it's the same conversation with just some different people. I mean, like, I don't even have to ask if anyone's had a boob job anymore because it's just the same shit over and over again. Yeah.

And Jackson's like, well, you know, we're a tight group, baby. And Ariana goes, yeah, right. And Brittany's like, listen, we just gotta own up for stuffi, shouldn't it text you? Just own up to it, Jax. And Ariana's like, I'm a working progress. I'm a working progress. Yeah, we're working progress.

We're working progress. Here's to the ladies who launch. Yeah. Jax is like, I thought I was doing better, okay? Like, of course, I'm gonna have some bad days. And then Stasi tries to explain like, I thought I was doing better, okay? Like, of course I'm gonna have some bad days. And then Stasi tries to explain like, you are instilling fear in us, and Brittany is making us scared of her

failing, so we can't even say anything to Brittany. And we have to be honest with you, okay? And Jackson's like, well, when it comes from you, it's fine. And Arianna's like, oh, when it comes from St, it's fine. And the area was like, oh, when it comes from Stasi, it's fine, but anyone else. Yeah. Exactly. And by the way, this is another example.

Why would anyone be friends with us couple at this point? Because he operates on a, his whole MO is, if you say anything against me, let them, we're not like I'm like, like, rain of terror is going to come from me. And then with her, if you say anything against me, like I'm like, rain of terror is gonna come from me. And then with her, if you say anything against Jacks, it's gonna be a whole sob story thing. Like I'm all over her friends.

So you can't like, the point is this, you really shouldn't be in a situation with two friends where there are hard truths to say, like that you can't say. Like have a be friends with two friends where there are hard truths to say like that that you can't say. Like how about these friends and two? How about the manipulation and they do it over and over again and the rest of this reunion, which is hilarious. And I love that she spelled it out so clearly.

And then literally like in the next five minutes, Brittany like turns her head to cry and then turns her out. Yes. You guys are meaning to me. It's fine. Literally. But how about you be friends with people had to cry and then it turns out that you guys remain to me. Literally. But how about you be friends with people that you don't even have to bother saying, like saying hard truths to, right? Like how about you just be friends with two people who are like nice and cool who you don't have to worry about like how they're gonna

take your kind criticism, right? Like we're here with them, I guess. But then the other part of that is like if you have to be friends because you're on TV with them, I guess. But then the other part of that is like, if you have to be friends, because you're on TV, okay, I get that. But don't stamp up for him in every fucking turn. You know, like this whole reunion was them like, you can't talk like that, Charlie. How dare you speak to Jacks that way. How dare you. But then they try and like act like they're taking a strong stance later when they're not and they never do. You know, it's just so hypocritical. No, I agree.

So what was Ariana's reaction to Jack saying he has mental problems? And he's like, well, he obviously does. He goes up and down, up and down. I mean, it's like, it's not a fucking lie. So please, let me hear what you have to say. Please. And she's, Ariana's like, so please let me let me hear what you have to say please and she's area on it's like well he probably does have issues and like my best advice to him is like find a therapist because that's what you do okay and sand balls like yeah do something about it bro and and he's

like well listen uh la la I heard that Rand recommended a good double fried chicken sandwich. Did you tell me where that is? Holy good ass. I heard that Rand found a great therapist named Colonel Sanders. And Mama was like, Andy, he didn't just recommend it. He actually paid for that snuff. And so, Lala, I'm having trouble hearing your lips are so big. It looks like you're just a little girl in a well at this point Could you pull this back a little bit?

Lala All right those balloons around your lips have now her take flight and you were actually hovering near a ceiling fan We want to make sure you're safe, so come on down want to make sure you're safe. So come on down. She's like, yeah, he didn't just rock Amanda Annie. He paired for that. So Sean and Jackson even show up and Jackson, you know, you're my boy, Jackson. You know, you're my boy. Yeah. Oh, by the way, there's also talk that Randall stopped following Jackson Instagram. I don't know if it's. Well, Lala, this is typical Lala too, you know, Lala comes and acts so nice, but all we've seen of Lala is she will be friends

with the most popular person. You know, the second these people got in trouble, she totally ditched everybody. It was like, I'm calling Faith, you know, when the rumor was that she pulled a knife on Faith and was saying that she was hiding all this stuff around her house to see if Faith was gonna steal it and all of this stuff, but when all this shit went down, she immediately, you

know, called faith and then stopped being friends with everybody. It's just so lala, you know, she does it. She's done it all season. That was her thing with James. It's like, she made up with James and that she couldn't be nice to James because the girls wouldn't let her. So she had to like, just James again, you know. Yeah, and I also feel like if it had been someone else who had like, oh, by the way, for people who were not didn't actually watch the show, what happened was that Randall found a really good therapist allegedly and set up, not only set up an appointment for Jackson, but also paid for it

and then Jackson show up. Now, and then Lala's just like, you know, you're my boy, you're my boy and I love you so much, but it's like other people, what I hate is that like she was really rude to someone like Ariana all season long who has always been Ariana and and Tom have really been in Lala's corner for like years when people, other people weren't. And, but now she has put her, she's now like put her not faith, but she's, she's really gotten behind the Jacks horse and and

For what look he said asshole like you did something really nice Randall did something really really nice Believe it or not, but what they have to be like for fucking jacks is therapy. He's the highest paid one They should have to but the point is this it's like what like her like her judgment is terrible her, like her judgment is terrible. Yeah. The judgment is terrible. So she, um, sand of all, it's like, yeah, because he doesn't want to do shit about it. That's why he doesn't care. And Jack's like, what is this to pick on Jack's session?

Well, yeah, classic. Yeah. And then Brittany, I mean, just so stossy told them they were doing. And then Brittany is like, I guess our friends don't even love us. Be quiet over there. Big, gold, Betty. Okay? You're fucking you're done Your friends spent like 45,000 dollars on your 10 event wedding, okay? I think they like you

And I was like it's my mom jacks My Mima's nice, but like it's my Mima's like cocaine me mom gonna take you home We're not gonna go shopping. No, I guess this is the last time I'm gonna see How long I'm gonna even live during all of this oh my god, yeah, I guess our friends don't even love us What part of Randall buying a therapy session for jacks is not showing love to you? Come on. Don't let me take up for Randall. Yeah. So, so that's like, so Lollis like, Britain, yeah, Lollis like, Britain Jacks, you guys are our people. I ride or dive, and Brittany like, puts up like a hair wall. She like looks away.

It's like, yeah. I don't know. It's like if you, if fantastic Sam's models were 3D, you know those pictures when you go get your hair cut of the cheap place, it's just like bad highlights and there's like to the side, you know. And she won't show her face. And she's like, Hey, come on man, ain't chowning me, man.

And she's like, I'm just trying not to cry y'all because I'm like nothing to y'all I've done nothing to y'all guy Oh god, it's so uh Santaval Santaval starts now getting mad um because because Jack's is saying that everyone's making everyone's making digs at me This is what everyone does. They're just making digs at me like dude No, no, it's always at the you know at the end of the scene at the end of the At the end of the season it's always day every day of Jack's taking. Oh, man. Like we just want to help you do Jackson's yeah, I'm not even talking about you Tom. I'm talking about like everyone else and here he on the go

Oh, it's not you Tom. You're just insignificant. Okay, it's not you Tom. You're just a bad friend. Okay. It's not you Tom You just stop Tom, alright So then Brittany does this whole thing she's like at the end of the day That's my husband. I'm always gonna take up for him and no one notices that they do the same shit sometimes. I'm like you know what I I think you want us to feel like you're, you're some noble cause. You created that noble cause for yourself. It's like me finding a piece of shit on the street and then someone comes to clean it up and saying,

listen, no, no, you can't clear away that shit because this is my shit. I have to take up for it. I have to take up for it. It's like, Ben, take up for a different cause. Not that piece of shit in the street. And also stop shitting in the street, Ben. How about that? Yeah. But it's like, you guys do all the same things too. I mean, it's like a bacon calling a pork ride to pig, Andy.

Okay, just not further in, Andy. And Ariana's like, God, a therapy. Just gotta... This is what I'm in therapy. I'm a garbage person. I'm a garbage person a person for garbage I'll do what the garbage wants me to do you want to hear the crocacol version of that because I've got one Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, What your dirty I said not back kind of therapy not back kind of therapy. So Brittany's like well I do want to get better and I work on it all the time like it's like a piano class You know like maybe if I just keep practicing It's like I'm always yelling at him and I'm gonna go's I hate that for you. I hate So then Jack's like oh come on like who are Tom and Ariana anyway?

Like who cares what Tom and Ariana think? So Tom Schwartz of all people is a little bit of a voice of reason. He's like, no, Jack's, no, this is a good thing. Ah, it's a good thing like the time I brought Skittles for Baba. You know? So like, you've talked about having mental health issues. And we're saying, just be more proactive instead of of saying instead of doing the same thing over and over again I'm expecting the same results be proactive. I mean, I don't know what proactive really means, but I hear it's really cool

It means I'm pro actors. You know, I always really like actors You know what I do my when I have problems is I just start taking a walk on the beach and then don't remember what happened for the next 12 hours Works every time right papa At which point now Tom has like three beans at a burst. Like, their entire room is just like bloody, like, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss, pss Jack's cuz I don't even need any help. I don't even need me. Yeah, I need an help. I just have mental issues Okay, well you pick up my mental issues. I don't need any help guys. I just need help Such immediate so everyone's yelling at each other and that segment ends and then Andy's like okay No one get up and then everybody just gets up

Yeah, so Jack's like I feel like Andy always has something against me. I don't know what it is It's like oh oh, the narcissist, the narcissist complex, rears his head yet again. And Andy goes, oh, me. Yeah, he's like, I'm not against you.

He's like, Andy, yeah, I got thick skin, but it's wearing down over the years, Andy. Yeah, it's called too much microdermabrasion from Groupon, Jackson. Okay, you look like a piece of chicken that's being wrapped up to go, okay? Like, stop, stop with that. So Andy's like the remnants of chicken that's being wrapped up to go, okay? Like stop, stop

with that. So I'm like the remnants of Cuckaroo. I'm sorry, what'd you say? I see the remnants of Cuckaroo. Yeah. So Andy's like, my job is to call people out, Jacks. And he's like, but I'm the best I've ever been. I'm the best I've ever been. And then what I have three bad days, three bad days, come on. I love how we can't keep a story straight, because like his, the story leading up to the wedding is that he's a changed man and everything is great and so he's like, I'm the best ever been, this is the best of me, this is the best of jacks, but then his story after the wedding was, I'm losing my mind, I can't think I want hurt people, I don't know what I'm doing, I don't know, I'm unraveling.

So which one is it, Jacks, which one, is this the best of you or is this the, like, I need help, I need help, I'm unraveling so which which one is it Jack's which one is this the best of you or is this the like I need help I need help I'm a work in progress. Yeah, Andy tells him But I think the problem is is that you don't watch the show Jack's okay cuz there's a disconnect cuz you don't see what we're seeing And I'm responding to shit that you're the happening on the show I you know what am I supposed to do and he's like oh well if I slip up just a little bit It's all we talk about and he's like, oh, well, if I slip up just a little bit, it's all we talk about. And he's like, we're watch the show. Okay.

Yeah. And he's like, did you see what happened to Stasian Kristen last week? Okay, it's not just you. Okay, we grill all of you sort of, well, you fired the girls, but not you. But yeah, he'll get his. But that's my boy, I'm saying that like, Jack's acts like

he's the only one who gets shit on the show. No, you all get a lot of shit. So stop acting like this. I'm coming to this, like, Jackson's already been fired. There is no fucking way Jackson's coming back to this show. He will be fired, right? I think he will be.

I think at this point, because the, the, the, the, I think that momentum online is getting pretty strong. I mean, who knows if the show's even coming back? Who knows? So Andy's like, Oh, yeah. They'll just revamp.

They'll just have all new people. Revander, pump it. So Andy's like, yeah. You got a lot, you do. You got a lot, shit. He's like, this is the worst reunion ever. I'm working progress. Working progress.

So then we have oddly enough, as it starts to come into the, as we come towards the final stretch, we go to some smaller story things, so we have, now we talk about Shina getting that psychic for Dana for her birthday, when Dana was not emotionally prepared for it at all. And she's like, well, as a lot of other people on this show have been on Hollywood, maybe I'm having that experience. Film for me was so incredible and I really found out that my grandma loved crop tops too

and that was amazing. And so I feel like it's sort of selfish in that moment like for me because I was just assuming that because I had a really amazing experience that also Dana would have an amazing experience too and we could maybe share an emotional crop top together. You know what I'm saying? And I like that Dana actually said

because my problem with this whole thing was like, she was trying to be nice. Like she's still Shina and it was stupid, but insensitive, but I think that she was coming from a good place. And I didn't like that Dana kind of turned it, you know, and kept using it against her. But I liked this, well, first of all, Dana's crying, which when people cry, like I'm such a big sucker for that, but also, you know, her mom passed away. And I'm just the whole thing so fucking sad, you know, but I like that she said, like of all, Dana's crying, which when people cry, like, I'm such a big sucker for that. But also, you know, her mom has to, and I'm just the whole thing so fucking sad, you know?

But I like that she said, like, look, honestly, I know she meant it in a good way, but it just really put me on the spot, because I've still really hurt my mom dying, and like, I've had to take care of myself my whole life, because my dad and I, as a relationship, didn't work out. So I've been, like, on my own, you know, and like, people think I'm a bitch,

because I have a rusty bitch face, but it's like active bitch face. Like, it like on my own, you know and like people think I'm a bitch cuz I have resting bitch face But it's like active bitch face like it's all the time, you know like it's it sucks You know it's like it's being tough is like my only option at which point these spanner I was like oh oh oh dear do I hear something at the door is that the little delicate wrap of a other of a broken little delicate rap of a other broken bird yeah you are your pretend season is buddy come here I'd like you to meet the rest of your family

jiggy swiggy spluffy fluffy diamond truce a cone and carton come on in darling bandy meet your new sister I'd last you finally have a sibling. What about me, mom? Oh, yes max two yes So it's a sad segment and yeah, and then of course jack tries to hijack it He's like I don't know if anyone can see me crying over here, but I'm crying too Listen, this isn't only the season I got married, but also I lost both my parents like within the span of five minutes or Yeah, I lost both my parents and lost both my parents

No, you well you lost one of your parents, which is tragic But you then I stout the other one that was disgusting. He is a disgusting monster of a human being my god disgusting. He is a disgusting monster of a human being. My God. And Kristen, I like Kristen going, uh, wish we could hug you. I wish like, because if we could hug you, we would all be around you in like one big circle. Uh, and it would look like this. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, my parents at the same time. You know, it was car accident. Unfortunately, Dodge Challenger. Don't know if any of you heard of that, but a fallen insurance claim on that.

But you guys, you don't understand the pain, guys, no one else understands. And he's like, well, I'm curious, if talking to people about this makes you regret all this stuff with your mom, Jacks. And Jacks, are you losing time with your mom right now? Don't you realize that, basically? Yeah, Jacks. And Jacks, are you losing time with your mom right now? Don't you realize that basically? Yeah, Jacks is like, yeah, especially now with the virus.

Like, I have no idea how my mom is. Like she could be dead in the pantry for all of it. Like Jacks, are people not allowed to talk on the phone or email or text her? He's acting like she's often an igloo up in the Arctic Circle. Like she up and abandoned them and they're like, where's mom?

I wonder what's happening with mom. She's exactly where you left her. Like don't act like, how's my mom doing? I don't know. I mean, it's just a shame that I stopped talking to her. Like no, you created this situation, Jacks. Yeah, you stopped talking to her. Then you went on national TV and trashed her ass.

God, I still want to, that will always be one of the great mysteries to me on this show the one of the great Cooled cases that I hope we find out about one day is what happened there because I just don't I've never believed that he's just like She didn't tell me about my dad being as sick as he was that just doesn't sound right because he was an Interviews before that saying like his dad was at stage a high stage stage. Or it's just none of it really worked out. I want to know what the real fight is, because I think it was about money or some shit, that he didn't get what he wanted and stormed out of there. And obviously I don't know, but I want to know.

I want to know. I think it's probably a lot of projected guilt. I would not be surprised if it's a situation. I mean, I'm sure she's not great either, by the way. She did rear this monster, you know? Yeah, but she is mortified by it because when we saw her on the show, like she was like, oh, God, Jacks, you know?

Yeah. At least it's like, aren't you embarrassed? And she's like, yes. But that big said, I would not be a surprise if he was like, if he called her and was like, should I come visit dad and he should probably like, if you want to, you can, or whatever, not at all. I wouldn't be surprised if like, she did not, if she did not say, you must come right now,

let's say. And then he didn't go. And so now he feels really guilty that he didn't go and he's not blaming her. And it's like, you can't blame your mom for that necessarily. I just feel like there's, it's not the story that Jack's telling us. I feel like there's another perspective. I want to know the real one. So, and he's like, well that was fun.

Let's switch gears, all right? Ariana, how did you feel when you saw it? Was Lala talking shit about your house? And not Stasi, after all of that. And that was, thank God he asked that. I'm thank God. I'm like, that's all I needed. But I did meet that question answered so I'm glad

yeah yeah yeah sauce like um I have a bone to fucking pick with everyone in this situation Shina how could you be so messy I guess that's on brand for you also um and she was like well I direct crotted the wrong person and I swear you chimed in but I'm so sorry Stasi and like Brett's like hey I just want to apologize for misleading Sheena into giving me the wrong quote like even though I told her what the right quote was But she's just like in love with me so I apologize for making her fall in love with me and miss Chris. I'm married And Stasi's like yeah, well you can say I'm Regina George. That's true And you can say that I'm bad credit Stasi because that's been true as well But to say it so easily it's like you're just like waiting to get it out like I like you

What is it how many years is it gonna take for you to understand that I like you? Okay Stasi's ongoing desire for Ariana's approval is the gift that keeps on giving or was the gift that kept on giving oops So Ariana is like she's's like, you know what? I lost it. I sound, I sounded like a psycho. I get it. But also garbage person. That's what I am. Oh my God. Bitch person. Give me a G. Give me an A. Don't give me any more letters because I just want to say But she's you know, still Lala doesn't get put on the spot about it. Yeah, she doesn't. That really bothered me. Yeah, so yeah, bothered me too.

But then we go to Sheena sending a group text to everybody, like a ranch joke about marrying ranch to set up Bo or whatever. And Jack's like, what does it say? What does it say? And they're like, you can't look at this because you refuse to group chat. So fuck you, you don't get to know what it is. Yeah. And so now we start talking about the Dana, Max and Brett trying to go,

I was like, are we really ending this reunion on this note? Maybe they thought, they would end on this note because they're gonna pivot towards them next season. I don't know, but two out of three of the triangular gone. So it's so tight. Hey. Yeah. So why does Max feel like he has a say

and who Dana hooks up with? And Max's like, well well at the time like bread And I were like inseparable like he was becoming the sand of all to my shorts. I'm like oh, man You willingly give yourself shorts. That's sad That is sad and it's also really try hard to be like where the next time and Tom like no, you're not Fire fired yeah, this is you burn west only would No, you're not. Mm-hmm. Um, fire fired. Yeah, this is a new burn. This is a new burn.

Fire fired fired. But Max, you didn't even seem to be fully into the relationship anyway. And Tanaqa is like, and the way that you talked about her, like, oh, if I fuck her, would you be mad? Like, if I fuck her, if I fuck her, like, honey, this is dual partnership. So if she chooses to have sex with you, okay, that's what it's all about. Okay, that's what it's all about.

My nostrils have... They're inverted now. Okay, they have inverted So yeah, Brett's like well listen I was just I had to consider my bros feelings alright and he's like I think Max and Brett should day and Lisa says cheers to that Well and Brett's like Brett's like, you know, I asked Max. I asked Max and she was like, yeah, but you weren't direct. That was the thing, you weren't direct, which is so true. Like, and that's Brett's whole thing is that he never,

he always acts like he's being super honest, because he's actually never upfront with how he feels or what he thinks or what he says. So, so there. I know I'm so sorry. I'm like totally bowing out of this section. I think it's just such crap This is all such a lie and Dana basically breath the and he asked about Brett and Dana's relationship and Brett's like

Well, we were together, but then I realized like, you know She was just a little too enemy Andy. I mean, it was moving a little fast. It's going to look too fast I didn't really need to shoot with her anymore, you know, so Dana's like that's bullshit I dumped you because you said that and it was ridiculous like we were seeing each other like a couple of times a week And then I was like want to go to a movie and then you were like well, this is moving too fast. So I dumped you Yeah, it goes so I was being honest with you. I was being honest. Oh shut up You weren't being honest because if you had been honest all along, then you wouldn't have made her... If you had been honest all along,

she would have known exactly the sort of pace that you would have allegedly wanted to be at and probably would not have even bothered, but you wanted to get some action, so you stopped with her a few times and then when she wanted to see a movie instead of sleeping with you, that's what it's going too fast, too fast. Lane. So then we get to the finale party where Danica got in a fight and got kicked out and over a thirsty little Sina twin. And everybody's basically sharing her on except Van her pump of course who has nothing to say about anything else that just happened is just when it comes back

to Danica. She's like, but I can't afford someone on the floor as explosive as you are. We're going to have to talk about that going forward, Missy. Yeah, she's like, when you're in hospitality, Danica, you're really going to check yourself because I cannot have a loose cannon on the floor I'm like, did you not see Lala last season who cursed out poor Raquel called her the seaword and like honestly if If they were still maintaining the rules that Lala did not have a sugar daddy was not living in the hills You would be a hostess again this season. Come on. And I wish they would have asked Annika about getting kicked out of the season premiere

party because she got kicked out of that too. Didn't she? Didn't she? I think she did. I think there were police there. Was it her that got kicked out? Oh, yeah. I think I heard about that.

I think she got arrested or something at the season premiere party. So I don't know. I'm not sure if that happens. So don't sue me. Okay. It's just stuff I read on the internet. Okay, so then we move on to James' apology to Fatman, Fatman, Fatman, Fatman, Fatman, Fatman. You're with the Fatman.

Here's a big Fatman, he's a Fatman with a fat face and a fat body because he's a Fatman, yeah, good. I just love that they're like, James, that's what your apology clip. Fat man, fat man, fat man, fat man, he's a fat man. That's why. So how's your relationship with Randall Bin?

He's like, it's been really great. I mean, ever since I apologize to that fat man, he's been really treating me like a skinny man. I've been really wonderful. I don't see any evidence of him being a fat man anymore, except physically, you know what I'm saying? I don't call him fat man anymore, Andy. Now I just call him man.

Ah. And he really pushed Lala back into my life. So I really have to be thankful for that. And Lala's like, I thought it was just like amazing, just as who James growth. And my fiance is just like the most amazing man I've ever met in my life. Oh, I don't know. I've what a waste of space. Jesus Christ.

So, final words, Christin, do you miss your friendship? Does anybody still care? And then Christin pulls her like, oh, of I wish I could have shared my house with them? Yes, do I wish I could have shown them that time that I got some peanut butter and it was crunching said a creamy and I was like oh yes and Crit Katie's just so bored Katie has not this is like the best reunion episode with Katie never saying one thing This is like my favorite thing not one damn word came out of Katie's saying one thing. This is like my favorite thing, not one damn word came out of Katie's. It's wonderful.

It's wonderful. It's wonderful. So then Vanderpump gives a speech about how we've been through so much in the world as a country and she really wants people to have the same cohesion we had going into this. I have to say I only recently found out that there was a pandemic no one told me but now that I know I will say it's unacceptable and we have to spend our time appreciating each other. Yeah, and Jack's like yeah, I'm good with how things are I don't do whatever I'm good with how things are and Brittany's like well personally I think if Jackson Tom hung out together they'd be good but the hadn't talk this whole time and he's just all here so I'm going I was like it's all here say what are you even watching the good wife and quarantine I know I've been watching Perry Mason so she's like and then she and Jack's

have this like quiet moment where she's like she's like don't get so angry at me Jack so I'm gonna say I guess well don't contradict me and throw these people don't contradict me which is that fucked up bullshit we've been talking about for like three seasons now about how like, Jack's circling the wagons around their relationship, which is totally a manipulative thing to keep like the woman under his thumb, like in control, it's just like, to me it's a sign of terrible, terrible things. So Lisa's like, she's like, what I want to see from all these people is a concerted effort for all of them to put it all back together. This is not good. We all have to come

together as a terrible team of people who do problematic things all the time, but still somehow have a job at my restaurants. Yes. I just want to get back to failing upwards. Can we do that, please? So then Andy brings on all the men, well some of the men. He brings on a pop-up. This is Peter's moment to come back, right? This is when he comes on stage with his little shots, you know, and they do that, but they didn't even ask

Peter to make a Zoom square. Yeah, Peter's so lame. So basically we see all the guys and Andy's like, Randall for years, you were reluctant to be on the show. She wouldn't even say your name. She just talked about tossing some guy's salad. That's pretty much it. So what do you have to say about that?

Now that we've got a face of that beautiful toss salad image, what do you say about that? Well, I was petrified for years to come onto the show, but then once the divorce was finally through and I years to come onto the show, you know, but then, you know, once the divorce was finally through and I got rid of a few of the mistresses, then I was like, okay, I can do this, all right? So I came on here and you know what, the end of the day, these are a family and I just wanted to support you and everyone made it fun and easy.

Plus, production offered me two fried chicken patties per day. They don't, instead of per diem, it was more perchickenium and I couldn't turn that down. So then we see Brock still hot and all I hear, says a lot of dumb things but he's just hot. And then she's like, well they're like, well, hey, does a big and quarantine with Sheena make you just digger even more? I was like, oh man, I've leaned a little and all I think she's a good piece. And you go on and say such good friends that at the end of it like you all love each other, she has a big heart and I'm Australian and did you do? Thank you. And then she knows like, Kessie, did you notice that Kessie and he kisses her, but like keeps looking at

the camera. He's like, did not notice that. Like he does. I want to just second the camera time there. God forbid. I just want to take this moment on television to announce that tomorrow we will be having blueberries in the pancakes. I thought these strawberries! Blueberries, blueberries it is, blueberries in the pancakes tomorrow. And that's pretty much it. Britain is like, I love you guys even though we just screamed at each other. Mmm.

Mmm. And Andy goes, wow, well, I can't wait to see you all in person soon. And Stasya gets, thank you Andy, which was sort of a hilarious bit of irony there. Well, there we go. It's over. So guess the next episode. It's over. What the hell is going to happen now on Vander Poemperous? Who knows? Who knows? Big question marks.

But in the meantime, I'll tell you what's happening next in the world of Watchcraft Ins. Selling Sunset is going to be, I believe that's our next happening next in the world of watch crap ends selling Sunset It's gonna be I believe that's our next episode right? Next episode of selling Sunset that will be our fifth episode of the week So we'll be back after that next week and of course we'll have a bonus up this week and all that good stuff too So go check it out go check out our other shows Go to my watch video on sunset season two episode two. I sure was imagine.

Yes, and that will also be a video. We're going to record that right after this. So that will also be a video available on crap and it's on to man. Guess what? Love what? What? I said, it's great, right? Everyone have a be safe and we'll talk to you in the next episode.

Bye. next episode. Bye! Hey, prime members, you can listen to Watcher Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey. free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey.