Watch What Crappens - PumpRules: Attack of the Wormstache Part One

Episode Date: May 25, 2023

*Also avail as video on Crappens On Demand http://bit.ly/crappensvideo* It's Part One of the Vanderpump Rules Finale, so buckle up. There will be a lot of crying and hopefully galaxy lights. This week's premium bonus is a recap of Below Deck Sailing Yacht. For bonus episodes and video recaps, join Patreon at patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens Tour Dates: https://www.watchwhatcrappens.com/2023-cheater-brand-tour/See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to watch what crap ends at free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. This episode is sponsored by Uber1. We've all used Uber for rides, and I love using UberEats for food delivery. Okay, hello. I mean, I kind of live off of it. But have you ever heard about Uber1? Uber1 is a membership that helps you save on Uber and UberEats. With an Uber-1 membership, you get exclusive member perks, like up to 10% off UberEats and a $0 delivery fee on eligible orders. It just makes sense. I'm always getting Uberes.

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Each finalist is driven by the same dream, to become music's next must listen. But to break through they'll have to dig deep, pushing their vocal, songwriting, and recording chops their absolute limits while keeping their feet and emotions firmly grounded. So who will break through? It's time to find out! Join Kelly, Sarah, and David on a musical journey unlike anything you've ever seen. This is Breakthrough. Listen on Audible or wherever you get your podcasts. Go to audible.com slash breakthrough. Follow along using hashtag BreakthroughXAudible. I'm not a fan of crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a crap, I'm not a Well, hello and welcome to watch what crap and support cast.

For all that crap we love to talk about broken bands on Bravo Tiling. I'm Ronnie, hi everybody, welcome to the show, please welcome my co-host, the hottest, sweetest, never gonna cheat on anybody or he's gonna lose his fucking dick in the process. Ben Mandelker, hi, Ben. Get over here. Hi, Ronnie. How are you? Are you Ben? Oh my god. Happy Vanderpump rules reunion recap day. It's a big one. The toxicity telling it's just lovely. I haven't had this fun with

I haven't had this fun with toxicity since Thanksgiving. I mean, my God. It's a good one. I know, this was a wild, wild hour. This is a wild hour of, I'm sorry, everybody, I did not wow, look at that. You know what, I'm sorry. Whoever's coming from Booth Bay Harbor, Maine, excuse me, that's like CSI over there.

Keepers calling in for some help from Clip. That is my ringtone that is an ode to the long lost TV show 24. Yes. Well, guys, it's a huge day. The reunion began. It was a great watch, a great hour of TV. All of these people, I'm sorry,

they're all terrible people. And I loved watching them all be terrible together. It was just like a melting pot. You know, the people that I'm never on their side, I was on their side this time. It was just so different. It was so fun. It was so unique. And I want to thank James James is coke dealer. Huge shout out. Because listen, I am a coke lover of old times, you know, not these days. He says, I'm cleaned up guys. But you know, I thought used to be one of my hobbies. And I would go back. I'm not apologizing, but I would just like to say, you know how hard it is to get a coke dealer at any time of day.

But James's shows up to the fucking reunion at 730 in the morning. I mean, good job on getting that Coke dealer. So this is a sponsored podcast to that Coke dealer. Thank you very much. Please send us your card. Great. You know what? I am so happy that you have said that because I'm writing this down. You know why? Because you know, I have this, I have my little newsletter I do on this side, you know why? Because, you know, I have this, I have my little newsletter I do on this side. My food newsletter, and this is not actually a plug, but I have my food newsletter, but as long as I am mentioning,

I will plug it's gold and BD fancy. Yes, it is. It's a sub-stack, or it's a sub-stack. It's a sub-stack, too, on the sub-stack. And so the reason why I bring that up is I was thinking about how like this Vanerpump Rules finale reunion has been so huge. The, you know, the, the finale got the series' biggest ratings ever.

4.1 million people watched it. So people were watching it who don't actually watch the show. And I've actually received texts from people who were like, I don't watch the show, but I actually tuned in to watch the finale because I wanted to see what all this was about. So I was like, you know, there's watch parties and everything. So I was thinking, what if I, I've started to write a newsletter about like what you could bring to a Vanderpump Rules reunion watch party potluck.

And so here's what I have so far. For Shina, the Shishu Mai. You know what I'm saying? Right? Let's go. Sand of all, I thought like shushu to peppers. Oh, she's shoe toe peppers. That's actually better. I like that. No, no, no, saying it's better. I've just listened to you say she's doing it.

I start thinking of things. Shushu to peppers. I like actually more than you know. Shushu Ma. You could do shushu shushu and have like a sushi roll named after Shina. I'm a sand ball. I could be in the shape of a corner. Well every time you bring the dishes to the table, you have to yell corner. That is one of the rules. For sand ball, what about, I was thinking like dirty rice because he's dirty. I don't know,

I feel like there's probably, there's probably something more damning, but I'm at dirty rice with him. Ariana, I thought green goddess salad or something like that. Or, you know. Tom, sand of all, you could do a most extras, like a side dish, you know, whatever the extras are. Like the most potato-y-est potatoes ever. Like French fries on baked potatoes or something. Yeah, but I feel like it's not enough of a criticism.

You know? Like a worm, What's a worm-y? You know, like a gummy- something with a gummy worm? Like maybe a gummy worm parfait or something? Yeah. For Ritail, um, baby backstab ribs? That's good. I was like, I like that pun. Yeah. Um, and uh, Lisa Vanderbump, I came up with LPs and Pasta Pesto from Inaigarten. Anyway, the point is this, James, you mentioned James as a Coke dealer. Maybe for James, it's a Coca-Cola cake.

Oh, that's good. That's because there's something like powdery or powdered donut cakes. We are, or pasta, because it's not about the pasta, right? Oh yeah, some kind of pasta. Like not about the, not about the, you know, I know sauce pasta, like a sauce pasta. Not about the coke pasta. I'll workshop it, everyone. You can just do a methamphetamine base sauce

for that pasta, just run with fat. Jim, just bring meth to the party. Just bring, just bring a bag of party. Just bring a bag of Coke. You don't have to be creative. All right, well, before we get into it, we are on tour. We finished up in June. As you guys know, we've been telling you a lot,

but this is gonna be such a fun month for us. So come check us out. We're starting in June. Okay, we're going to six places and that's where we're finishing. So listen up, San Diego, St. Paul, Minnesota, Chicago, Illinois, Columbus, Ohio, Boston, Massachusetts, and the Foxwoods Casino in Connecticut

is gonna be our big finale. It's gonna be our amazing finale night. Also, we are a video podcast now on YouTube. You can find all our videos on YouTube for free. We wanted to add a bunch of stuff. We've been doing Patreon for years. We've been getting a lot of support from you guys over the years on Patreon.

We really appreciate it. You guys let us quit our jobs and do this full time. You know, we will never forget that. And so we're giving back, you know, give back. So now we're putting our videos for free up on YouTube a week after they have aired on the regular feed So if you're on Patreon you get a lot more now and if you're not on Patreon you get a lot more now You know what we're all getting a lot more also it all all the levels at Patreon now include the discord feed

So that's we want to grow that community because that's a great private place for us all to go talk shit So join that thank you for everything you do for us all to go talk shit. So join that. Thank you for everything you do for us over there. I don't wanna do too much because I know we're gonna be here three hours today. Our shows have been getting longer and longer and longer, but before we get into the recap, I do wanna talk about, man, Ariana. You know, I have to say,

Ariana is on the verge of people turning on her. I see it coming because she's really taking every bag that comes her way. Now, let me say my personal opinion on this, you go, you get those fucking bags, girl. I wish I could put a hamburger mask on and be in the caboose of a train with you, just grabbing the bags as he's throwing them to me

and stacking them up. But this girl is not missing a bag. We got an email last week that was like, guys, Ariana has a very important announcement coming on her social media on Monday. What is it going to be? What is she going to say? What is she going to do about Scandinavol? Monday comes the announcement is, I love big razors.

I was like, really bad, seriously? Okay, so then there was that. Then there was the one this week. Oh, Ariana's finally moving out on Tom and it was all over the news. It was everywhere. And then what do we find out? I knew that was fishy because those moving boxes were like file moving boxes. And I was like, what is she move? She wouldn't have file boxes. Like, you can tell she's never moved herself, you know, but then it turns out to be an ad for SoFi.

And she's like, I'm moving out my finances. And I was like, Jesus, you, I've never seen somebody capitalize on pain this well. Part of me is like, that's tacky as shit. And the other part of me is like, you go. Because who knows how long this is gonna last? You make all the damn money you can, and then just disappear into the night.

Is what I feel like she's gonna do. I'm ready for the next teaser. It'll be something like, Ariana attacks Tom Sandeval with perfect breath. Ariana first serves. But she attacks Tom Sandeval. Everything's just like clickbait stuff for her.

Yeah, Ariana's dating twins. Double men twins. It's like, but it is bizarre to see the publicity tour of talking about something so deep and dark. And it's so popular that it's on all of these shows now. And the people are just like she was on the view. And the people on the radio don't watch it, you know, and I watched the view clip

because I was curious and you know it's like you got Joy Bayhara there making like, hey, I don't watch this shit, like what is this shit to you right? Like what a stupid fucking show. So what is it, some guy with a mustache cheated on you. Look what is this? What is this to you, she's like, yeah.

Yeah, he sure did, he cheated on me. And then they're all kind of making jokes with the cheating expense. And you just enjoy Bayhara's out with the cheating expense. And they're just, you just joy Bayhara's out of touch with something. That's not, that's not the right. That's just the right disconnect of people who don't even watch it getting in on it.

And Gary, I'm just sitting there smiling like she's at the end of a beauty piece. Like being asked questions at a beauty patent just like he sure did cheat on me with one of my best friends. But I'd like to thank so far for helping me take those, those dollars I had in my nightstand

and turning them into a college fund for my future embryos. I have to say when Tom Sandevol did that to me, it cut, but not as nicely as a big razor. He was smooth, but not as smooth as my legs nicely as a big razor. Also, like, what am I? It was smooth, but not as smooth as my legs after picking them up in my eye. Thanks, good.

Wow, I saw my way out of that relationship fashionably for Bloomingdale's. Girl, get the bag. Okay, get all cash in. Congratulations. Should you enhance me with the stars? I mean, all these things. I feel like it's funny that you mentioned the view.

I feel like I've seen a lot of things. I don't watch the view, but which is funny because I literally was just about to make fun of Joy Bayhara for doing exactly what I just did. But like, it does make me, I always hate it when people are on shows like that. And Joy Bayhara's like, so I don't watch this show.

I don't watch this. So what is this show? This is like, so you guys are like, you guys are likehar is like, so I don't watch this show, I don't watch this. So what is this show? This is like, so you guys are like, you guys are like bartenders, like I don't watch this show, tell me about, like why are you flaunting? Do you think it makes you special that you don't watch the show that your guest is on?

It's one thing for me to say I don't watch the view, but I don't have Joy Behar sitting next to me. I was like, well, I don't watch your show, but it sounds like you got a scandal going on. Like it's just so rude. Right, I don't expect them to watch everything. You know what I mean? Like, I get it.

Like, I get that you don't watch it. It's just like, you're sitting, you at least know that this woman was cheated on by her partner of nine years with her best friend. Why are you guys? No, hypocritical. I know because here I am making jokes. But again, she's not sitting right in front of me. It's like, oh, to be cheated on you, what? You know, that's a guy you don't want to play monopoly with. Am I right? Am I right?

It's like, where are you making, you know, and then Arianna just has to sit there and smile through it. Yeah. And you knew that I had like a serve root to even say that because you know that Arianna is now the new ambassador for Monopoly by Hasbro for crying out loud. ambassador for monopoly by Hasbro for crying out loud. Hi, I'm Ariana. And I'm monopolizing on this situation with Ariana monopoly available now at your local toy store. So good for her, you know, get that money. So here we go into this reunion. Just warning people, this is extremely chaotic, there's gonna be a lot of screaming and a lot of talking to each other.

In other words, it's just like an episode of Watch What Happens Anyway. So, I guarantee I'm gonna get lost many times in these notes, because there's so much happening and there's so much repetition, it will be very easy to think that we're farther ahead than we are behind. It's just gonna be like a

It's like an escape room of a reunion, you know There's no there's no opening drawers looking for clues girl. We've got a full month of this there is no Fucking escape so buckle in okay, so we start with Andy doing a What well we've get we get like don't don't, don't, don't, you know, the black screen, the dramatic music. And then we hear Andy saying, I'll let this go from a one nice stand to a full relationship between the two of you. I'm sorry.

Is that your first question? How about this? How did you go from a peppy twink with a dream to a leathery Phillips hue, move colored washed up, otter and two years, sand of all? I mean, Jesus Christ. Is this what shaving your entire face does to you? Because I'm out. You know, I started shaving my entire face when I saw him doing it on TV because he looks

so young and adorable. Now, look at him. What the hell? You look like something Keith Richards fucking shat out. How did you go from being so cute and young to this? It's literally- It's literally- it's fucking shat out. How did you go from being so cute and young to this? It's literally- It's literally-

Making Iggy Pop look like a viable oil of Ola candidate, okay? Like, it's like, hi, I'm Iggy Pop. For skincare. You look like a pre-cut belt. You know what, like a belt before it's been through the oiling process. Like what in the leather factory happened to you? The California raisins are like,

dude, have you thought about Moisturizer? Yeah. And so they've been loving these movie preview sound effects on Bravo. Their favorite one is the... Yeah, like the inception one. Mm-hmm. But today they're using a lot of that really high pitched.

Hmm. Yeah. It's from horror movies. It's like kind of that under the sea dong. Under the sea dong. I like that. Also, they told their post-production department, listen, try to make this look as much like a movie as possible.

So go crazy with the titles and the Kairan because this is going to be your moment to make it seem like a movie. So we get on screen after Andy asks that question, goes, the scandal, all written in big white letters. And then it's like Andy asking Tom, like, are you in love? And Tom's like, oh. And then we get like the whole trailer like coming up scandal that changed everything the reunion that I'm Covers the whole story and then it got to Ariana crying and she's like I can't

think of two words people I can't you can't do not watch Bravo do you have you heard of Hitler or Stalin they're definitely I mean they're I'm they're pretty bad these two are pretty bad but she's like there's no two worst people and then we see her coming in and her yellow jumpsuit and I know it says something like fuck boys but it's like I hope all boys die in a fire something that. And she's talking to Katie. She's like, I don't see anything good coming for either. Those fucking rats.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Fast and furious.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Cheating. Mm-hmm. Um, Petrae. Oh. I'm surprised they didn't do the fast and the furious Tyrant because like

the NBC Comcast, like they love a Tyrant. You know, I'm surprised Vin Diesel didn't sit down and be like, yeah, my thoughts are what happened with this controversy. You might have seen something fast and the furious, put a bowl of Cheetos in front of Gaia then watch you go. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Scandival. More like Scandival's gone, because Gal ate it. Ha ha ha ha. Okay, don't get all pissed off, everybody. Those are running top chef jokes.

Enjoy our top chef recap coming out on Memorial Day. Yeah. Ha ha ha. So, yeah, so Ariana's outfit does not say anything about fuck boys, but I think I did catch the word Ciempere in CMA on it. I don't know. I'm getting married in the end. So, yeah, so then Andy's like tonight a reunion that may be more explosive and dramatic

than anything you see in the show's 10-year history. I dropped my Q cards. I dropped all my cards. It's explosive. That is the biggest moment of the reunion. When Andy literally throws his hands up in the air and goes, My cards! My cards! My cards!

My cards! They show it on the trailer for this reunion. They show that moment, but it looks like he's being tongue in cheek. But thenek, but then like actually you see he's like kind of having a little tantrum He looks like he's gonna start crying. It is so fucking funny And it's funny that they don't even cut away from it or cut it out like everyone just keeps fighting and they show and be going on the ground Getting his own cards also It's going like, God. Also, lazy security team or in most non-existent security of all time,

I literally, I literally, I literally, I literally, I think those were security. I think those were pretty serious. I know that's like, I think I was not security. Like no one jumped in the helps.

Andy, do you think Andy made a request that if there's could be a fight that he's gonna be the one to break it up? Like I wonder if he really, if he, it would make sense if he asked that to be like, guys, it'll make for great TV. Remember the time that Theresa pushed me down in the chair 10 years ago? Wow. You know what I don't know. I feel like he's too small for that.

I feel like he should, I feel like he doesn't want to be in that situation. You know what I mean? I think Andy likes being in this situation where he seated next to everybody because I feel like shorter, shorter men specifically. There's such a thing especially on Bravo of like I'll only date him if he's like six but four which explains the Southern charm cast. Okay. So I think that Andy prefers being seated next to people

which is always why he's first on the set. He's always sitting. You know, you very rarely see him walk into the set. He's always sitting down next to every. He's called like a Tom Cruise thing. So no, I don't think you would purposely jump in between taller people than him. But what we know.

And actually his real, his favorite posture is actually not even to sit. It's to slide his head all the way down to the top of the chair and put his feet out and start texting. Yes. That's the... He's all the way down there. So one day earlier Avenue six studios and Andy is sitting down with Tom and it's in a reunion first

Oh, sorry. He doesn't even say this it just says it on screen But I'll say it in Andy voice in a reunion first Andy sat down separately with the principles of the scandal to hear their sides of the story. So then, he's talking to Raquel first, I think. So he's like, oh no, it says what is the truth and then it cuts his sand of all in the trailer with Raquel and he's like, they're making the sound to be pathological liars. I know, even though we're not.

Yeah, we're dolphins. Wait, that was a lie, sorry. I hate ice cream socials. Yeah, that sucks. That was a lie too. What are we doing? Don't, don't, don't. Don't.

Where is the trash? So we see it, like Tom sitting down in front of Andy and Andy's like, hey Tom! Andy, how you doing? I'm okay. Oh god, his despondent, like, I'm depressed, I'm in a clad of all sweater, I'm gonna stare at the ground a lot and like, look like I'm about to cry. It's like no one's falling for it. Sanimal, okay. So then, and then it's like for Tom Sandivall, it was one final chance to come clean before

the next final chance to come clean. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crap and it's come. If you're hiring, you know what it's like to deal with economic uncertainty. And now more than ever, it's really important to hire the right people faster and more efficiently because you gotta keep the overall cost down. And thankfully, there's a hiring partner who's focused on you and your needs, and that is Zip Recruiter.

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Again, that zippercruder.com slash C-R-A-P-P-E-N-S. Zippercruder, the smartest way to hire. I'm going to say something scandalous, Ronny. Go on. Plants are meat. And not only are they meat, they're delicious, especially if they're from impossible foods. They taste like beef.

Exactly. Impossible is making meat history this summer. Yeah, they are. Summer of Impossible. I am so excited to be spending time cooking my summer foods, all that good stuff, and guess what? We can use impossible sausages, impossible brats. I mean, it's going to be a great summer for impossible foods. Impossible beef is made from plants and 19 grams of protein per serving, and it's better

for the planet. And it's meat. Plant meat. Correct. So if you're looking for something to grab for your grill, grab some impossible beef. Summer of Impossible. Start making meat history today, just head over to the meat aisle at your local grocery store, grab some impossible beef or patties and get grilling. So Andy's like, can I not feel the most aided man on television right now? And he's like, airbie. So then we cut to Ariana's interview, her one-on-one. And she's like, I'm much better now, Andy. Now that I've learned that all I really need for good hair is a hot oil treatment

from. I was going to say VH1. What is a hot oil treatment? V05. VH1 presents V05 by Ariana. Listen, all I know is in retrospect I'm standing head and shoulders above Tom, which is why I prefer I know is in retrospect, I'm standing head and shoulders above Tom, which is why I prefer head and shoulders. It's a collab. Head and shoulders, ex Arianna. So let's see. So then he's talking to Raquel. And Raquel's like in this blazer, like Raquel's at the people's court today.

I don't know where Raquel thinks she's doing. Like she's like, I'm not behind on my, she's at the People's Court. Like I'm not behind on my rent. I'm in a laser, you know? She looks like she's about to present that aboard meeting. She's like, here are the stats for last year, last quarter's fiscal revenue. It's like, Rick Kell, you just put up a picture of Garfield.

Oh no. He's like, how do you feel about seeing everyone in a group setting? And she's like, how do you feel about seeing everyone in a group setting? And she's like, pie chart. I'm sorry, I really don't know what that means. Could you be more specific? Copy machine, stapler, phone with cords, and then please hold.

I'm just like, all right, can we get this? Can we get this girl into something? That would be great. It's somewhat give Rikkel the Uline catalog. Come on now. So, and then it says, for Rikkel, it was a chance to explain how it all happened, dot, dot, dot, but more on that later. I was like, well, that wasn't cinematic to say, but more on that later.

Why do you have to even say that? Come on now, people. Yeah. So then we go back to Ariana and, or Ariana. And Andy is like, have you seen or spoken to Raquel? Since the skat of all. And she's like, it took her like a whole 48 hours to text me. And then we see the text and Ariana texted her,

you are dead to me. And Raquel texted back, Ariana, I don't know what to say right now. Besides, I really fucked up and I'm so, so, so sorry. And then Ariana wrote back, shit the fuck up, you fucking rat. Just and then I blocked her. I was burned by a rekelle, but wait, no one thing I'm not burned by. My black and decker iron.

Okay. Ariana. I would like to also thank the Bravo Gods, because I made a very specific request, either at the end of last season or the beginning of this season. I did not ask for her to get cheated on, but I did say something needs to happen to Ariana to activate this pissed off side of Ariana,

because I've missed it. Because on the show, you know, we'll talk about this as we go into the recap. There's such a, there's like all these accusations that she curates everything to make it look perfect. And, A, I don't know that that's really the worst thing to do. I think that's probably a smart thing to do if you're on TV, is to not look like an idiot. But there's a lot of accusations of that, and I think it's worked.

I mean, she does look like kind of the saint of this show, you know? And we've always said, it's like the nicest person on this show. It's almost weird that there's someone this normal and nice on the show. But my favorite part was when she got really pissed off in her first season and her, I'm prettier than you and I'm smarter than you. So get the fuck over it. Whatever that was. I've missed that. Yeah. Well, she angered, you know? And I love seeing, I'm sorry that we had to take this road to get there, but I love seeing it back. I love it too, because she's actually so good at it.

And I feel like Ariana's like Candy Burris, which is they just sort of, they float along, they do their thing. But then like, if you come for them, you better watch out, because they actually can react and people don't realize that. And like for much of Ariana's time on this show, she was having to react to the witches of WeHo. But then over the past, during the adulting phase of this show, she hasn't had to do it as much. And she just sort of been like, they're almost on the sidelines, just sort of like been nice and sharing her struggles

or whatever, but she hasn't really had to like, clap back at anyone in a very long time. So people have forgotten that she can clap back quite well. And this reunion was a great return to form. It really was. And it was, you know, the whole thing when she was sitting down with Tom and that had only been like what two days, I guess, then it took them to get the cameras back up two or three days. But after the scandal, the scandal happened on TMZ, I love that she was the one to call because we found out one of these interviews that she was the one to call because we found out one of these interviews that she was the one to call producers and say, this happened, we need to get it on camera,

which I find I love. Okay. And then the other is when she told Tom, you know how we talk about like how the power of being a real housewife or a Bravo star, whatever, goes to their heads and makes them all crazy. And it hasn't really done that to her, which I think has always been cool, but you just saw it affect her in that moment

because she saw the reaction across the country when it happened and how it was all over the news and how we all just rallied around to her right away. And when she told Tom, did you really think you were gonna be able to cheat on me and get away with it? It was like it was like kind of that Super hero moment or that like that Avengers moment like did you think you were gonna gonna

Way with us and then everyone just starts turning to dust and like flying away. She has yeah She's been masterful in this and I you know I think it was really smart of her to tell the producers bring the cameras not because it helped elevate this story and made it even more of a media splash. It was her way of saying, Tom is like a narcissist and he's gonna try to spin this as if this were my fault.

And I want this to be recorded. I want people to see this. And I think that was really good for not just obviously the show, but I think it's really good for her legacy because these days on the internet everything gets, he starts going out there doing how we Mandel interviews and says, well, everyone's like, she just like didn't want

to have sex with me anymore. And people kept dying in her life and it was such a bummer, like I'm stupid, I hate her. And then all of a sudden people would be like, I don't know, I kind of am with Sandeball, but like people see this and they realize like, he is garbage, he is full garbage. And she controlled the narrative.

And I know the best way to control a narrative is to write things down with Microsoft Word, ex-Ariana. Uh-uh, uh-uh. Let AI narrate it for you. That's the power of IBM. So Andy's like, so he's talking sand of all again. He's like, looking back, when did you realize you had feelings for rock hell? That's how he says rock hell. He's like, rock hell. And sand of all is like, honestly, Randy? Ah. Through our last year in the beginning of the year, I started to see if she really was, Randy.

He's like, so when did you guys first hook up? When did you see your boobies? Are they real or fake? Okay, if I'm gonna show you three pair of boobies and you guys, which bear is wrong, Klaus? Randy, this is not what you're laughing at. All right. We'll do it. All right. We're my cords. Those hotter Julie Chen, Rick

Owl or Ariana. So Tom's like, um, so like like we had sex like that first not at the Mondrian and like that the very next see you next Tuesday they were filming and like we weren't a part of it but like then like a bunch of us went out to the Abby and it was that night and Andy's They were filming and like we weren't a part of it but like then like a bunch of us went out to the ambie and it was that night.

And Andy's like, you had sex that night. He's like, yeah, yeah, I did. Okay, cool. And you have any videos of that by any chance? Just for my own personal collection. So then we cut back to Ariana's interview. And he's like, did you suspect anything at all? And she's like, no.

And he says, you vehemently stood up for Tom. And she's like, I would just like guard me vehemently stands up for my home by giving it the best protection possible. And so we see clips of her standing up for Tom Sandevol, which sucks. And she's like, but look, like as a loyal partner, if he gives me an answer, I give him the benefit of the doubt. That's how it works.

You know, that is how it should work. It's an anti-S Tom. He's like, so when you're all glamping for a Kells, Rack Kells birthday, at that point, would you two together? And he's like, no, no, we had that like first time and then like we worked together at all until we were together.

Which we took a break. We took a break. Yeah, which is the break. Yeah, it's the only reason I'm correcting it is because that's a phrase you use when you're dating somebody. I know. You took a break.

You don't use that after a one-mile stand. You use that when you're dating somebody. You fucking... That's not so funny. It's like, no, we were, no, it was just a one-time thing until we made it a second and third and just became a thing. We took a break after that one-time reading.

So he's like, so what did it pick back up? And he's like, oh, and he's like such a bad liar. He starts doing that like squint thing. Where is like looking around the room? And he's like, a bad liar. He like starts doing that like squint thing. Where is like looking around the room? And he's like, I remember being a little after the life is beautiful party after we wrapped. Which of course is because he wanted to wait

till after the season so that he wouldn't have to put it on camera. And that's important to point out because he's such a fucking hypocrite about this later. So, um, Andy's like, but before Bravo Con, and he's like, you have that concert, and I was standing in the front. And then we see a clip of this concert with Andy standing in the front doing his signature headbop, but his also confused face, looking at Tom Sandebal, rock guy. He's like, okay, cool. It's a child art orchestra was not expecting that. Okay.

Wow. I could have been just listening to John Mayer jam out, but this is cool. Kind of. That is like, you know, when you're standing there on stage, I mean, I was there, okay? And like, when you're standing there on stage, and like, you see your girlfriend and your missions

nice to each other, like, what are you thinking? And like, did it get you off? And he's like, I was like, no, no. No, no. Really? No boner at all? Not at all? No, Andy. Did you get a half-ie? No, Andy. I did not get a boner, bro. What about what I lifted up my shirt and showed you my nips?

Well, dude, that was actually like... Oh, the hardest part for me. I'm boner bro. What about what I lifted up my shirt and showed you my nips? Well, dude, that was actually like, the hardest part for me. Oh, disgusting, bro. You shouldn't do that to me, bro. Just gotta be honest, gotta have me right now. He's like, Go! Hey, do you know any grateful debt by any chance?

Cause that would really, really complete this fantasy for me like JC Casey Jones anything So then he is talking to Ariana and he's like so do you ever think wow how did I miss this one guys so Glaringly obvious and all the footage we've just shown and she's like um More so with her than him, because like, we all know men are trash, like no offense, but like, cool.

But your girlfriends, like I trust my girlfriends. So they have someone so ingratiated in my life and be my friend, like, how can I have someone that's that close to me and have time to cook dinner? I don't, which is why I use Hello Fresh. Haha. I, but I can't imagine doing this to one of my girlfriends and you're like, well, the big question on everyone's mind is, how did things come to you cheating on your girlfriend of nine years and one of your closest friends?

And Sandra Paul's like, well, Ariana and I kept our relationship pretty private over the years. And we had issues. And I felt like I was like our gay BFF, who doesn't listen to Beyoncé, which I guess I don't know. Maybe that disqualifies me from that analogy. But we put on a front when we were filming. And I even talked to our showrunner about it.

Look, there's footage of me. Can you please play that footage? Please. I mean, we speak up of him. And it it. Look, there's footage of me. Can you please play that footage, please? I mean, we speak up of him and it's off camera, but we hear him talking and he's like, yeah, well, I feel guilty because people put themselves out there and it's important for us to talk about this shit

and not just pretend like it's all amazing. Oh, really? Oh, so you were doing this already after you were fucking Rikkel. So you were telling the producers you wanted to, so Ariana, you wanted to show the world what a bitch Ariana was and how much your relationship was in trouble. So you'd have an excuse for doing all this bullshit

that you're doing and it's not a fucking excuse. You fucking lose her. Exactly. What do you know, I'm saying transparent. How stupid do you think the world is? You know, come on. We're not all cast of Vanderpump rules.

Yeah, like you're literally acting like, you're literally cheated on Ariana, and then you're saying you wanna put all this shit out there, like, he's a lunatic. So Tom's like, Yeah, for like, for us not like these issues and keep them from people, like I didn't think it was fair

out of the rest of the cast. You know what's also not fair? Cheating on your girlfriend. With her best friend. So your whole affair, you kept from the cast in the cast. You know what's also not fair? Cheating on your girlfriend. With her best friend. Your whole affair you kept from the cast and the show. So I deem your lame and consequential argument and valid, sir. It's invalid.

So Andy's like, where are their elements of your relationship that you were hiding or not sharing? And Ariane was like, I felt like I always showed everything. Like from my point of view, he's framing it now as like something else. Like he just has to and he's like,

that's pretty, he will throw anything at the wall right now and hope it will stick because he's the one who's to tell me. I mean, he coached me on this the same way that he's coaching Rikkel. I mean, it's almost like he could be working for Zip Recruiter and giving great advice to people who are looking for jobs. Zip Recruiter by Ariana. What do you think he's doing, Rikkel? And she goes, oh, he's saying, you gotta get your story straight, I'm giving great advice to people who are looking for jobs. Ziffer Cruder by Ariana.

What do you think is Daling Raquel? And she goes, oh, he's saying, you got to get your story straight. We got to get our lives right. Because if they don't have matching answers and he goes, oh, you've moved from Tears Danger, I see. She goes, yeah, but the indifference is becoming strong in me. And I love that that's her star wars thing, like the indifference is strong. So I like that's her superpower, like just not to give a fuck.

The indifference. I would love that. I would point this out. I have to point this out. You're saying that you showed everything, but that Tom coached you to make sure that you guys had the correct lies. And then you admit later in the show that there are things like Miami Girl and stuff like that that you kind of went with Tom and lied about to protect image. So you were guilty of doing the Tom,

let's pretend everything was perfect when it's not. And I don't know that that's necessarily bad. I just feel like as a recap, we should point that out. Because you're saying when sentence, like I showed everything from my point of view, he taught me how to lie real good. I was like, hmm.

But I guess maybe what it sounds like, as she's saying, everything in my life, I was like, I think she was maybe, yeah, I agree. It seemed like she was complicit at least in Tom creating manufacturing his moments. I think where it gets fucked up is that Tom is the one who clearly is like, these are our stories. What you got to say, this is how we have to be. And she's like, fine, if you need this, fine, you know? He's acting like the problem is he's acting like,

he's always wanted to show everything when he's always the one who's lying and not wanting to show everything, right? Yeah, exactly. Um, also it doesn't matter. And I think she makes this point later and I think she makes a really good point later when she yells at Andy.

And she's like, that's not the point though. The point isn't, what if we shone? What have I lied about in the past? What is none and none and none? None of that matter. It's the fact that he fucking cheated on me with one of my best friends. That's the point.

It's like, there's no justification for it, you know? And so everybody in this whole reunion is trying to, well, sand-evolve, fan-der-pop, Andy. It's like, but why? Why would you cheat on her? And then he gets to come out with this whole defense on why Vanderpomp, Andy, it's like, but why? Why would you cheat on her? And then he gets to come out with this whole defense on why he would do it, where it's like, you don't get to do that.

Mm-hmm. And like, also, isn't this such a great counterpoint to like Brittany, you know, like looking at like Brittany and Jack's the way she handled, the way she reacted to Jack's cheating on her with faith, you know, and like, but I really love him deep down inside her with faith, you know, and like, but I really love him deep down inside, but like, you know, he did wrong, but like I know he's good.

And I love Ariana being like, fuck, no, this is, this is terrible. And doesn't matter anything in a really ship like this was wrong. So well, it's not an exact comparison only because if faith wasn't friends with anybody, right? So yeah, and certainly not best friends with Brittany. So, I guess that would have, I guess that's like the main thing here is that it was a bad, as we're told many times, I wasn't your best friend. How? I guess the thing is, I guess the thing is it's more like we're seeing Ariana not

fall for all the, all the, all the employees and all the like, uh, I'm a work in progress and it was my fault. And I guess I was acting out and yada yada yada. All that stuff, like she doesn't fall for any of it. And we actually, this is like, she's just like, no, she just rejects it wholesale and she refuses to let him change the narrative, the convenient narrative. She stays like, she just stays on message, right? And like, she stays on message. And she has said in an interview that she did earlier in the week, there've been literally so many.

Like, I don't know if it was the New York Times or the Penny St. It was one of the two or something. L.A. Times. Yeah, but she was saying that he had been yelling at her the whole time about the affair, like blaming her and yelling at her. And this is how she knows, this is why she's like,

fuck this guy, then the minute the camera turns on, he starts crying and acting like, but I didn't want to hurt you. And so she's like, fuck this guy, you know, fuck this guy. Okay, so then what do we do? We got to Ariana and she and her getting ready in the mirror now telling each other,

they look amazing. And she was like, I'm, thank you. Like I've probably lost five pounds in the past two weeks. I'm, yeah. Yeah, now it's the day of the reunion. And Ariana's like, same. I lost five pounds too.

Thanks to the neutral system. So James is, meanwhile James is doing his hair. He's doing his hair spray the neutral system. So James is, meanwhile James is doing his hair. He's doing his hair spraying everything and the cast is like fuck out of that hair. You know what? Today, I should have worn my save the earth shirt today instead of yesterday, because that Paul Frank monkey could have taught us all something today. James, what are you doing? Can't we spring your hair like that? And James is a fire hazard. I can't tell what he's

had done to his face, but it's obviously something. Right? Really? Tell what he's had done. I know. I think his face. I mean, that doesn't look like there's no filters or anything. You think you think there's stuff? Yes. There's definitely. He looks more like a, he looks more like action figure James than like, you know, little kid weird face James. Maybe he's not, I'm worried. He got a little bigger, you know? He did get bigger, but there's something different. That's right.

And the only reason I'm pointing it out is because I love how vain he's become. I just think it's hilarious. Like every time they show James, he's puckering in the mirror and squinting his eyes like he's in a modeling. He's like, hmm. I mean, he has never really looked this good.

So, you know, he's earned his vanity, but it is hilarious. He really has, he's never really looked this good. So, you know, he's earned his vanity, but it is hilarious. He really has, he's very aware of how good he's looking these days. So, feel it, feel it James. Feel it James. It's just the, the pucker and pout. I know, it's a pucker and sensual ridiculous. It's such a, used to be a website on the show by Miss Katie Maloney.

You know, it's almost like he has a divine addiction to himself Sorry, I talked about bubbles and bingles and beads darling. It's time for commercial It's time. Hi, I'm Michael Patrick King host of the official Max companion podcast and just like that the writers room Each episode members of the writers room and I unpacked moments from season 2, sharing juicy details you can only hear from us. Stream and just like that season 2 starting June 22nd on Max, and listen to end just like that, the writers room on Max, or wherever you get your podcasts. So, um, then we go to Schwartz. Schwartz is the first one out on stage and Andy does a story. And he's like, Schwartz, I've got a story on Instagram, I want to do with me.

All right, here's my question to you. Were you silent? Or were you silenced? And you're like, ah, well, as usual, I won't commit to anything, so I'll just say the answer is both. What a fucked up situation, Andy. Andy's like, yeah, okay, cool. Listen, I wasn't really answering, listening to what you were saying. I was just trying to just make a cool selfie. So then- It was the important thing.

I just want to show that, you know, I want to show some solidarity with Katie by getting Bob Ballaband frames, but this time they're in the same pattern as her arm tattoo. It's like really, are you wearing leopard print Bob Ballabands right now to show solidarity with Katie? Leopard Ballabands. Did you get the new leopard Ballabands? They look amazing. Run a print ballabands out now, lens crafters.

Lala's out next. Lala looks like amazing. Oh my god, this is Lala just like dropped it in this. And he's like, wow. And then James comes out and he's like, oh, oh, James, looking good too. Wow, everyone looks great today. It's like everyone got you to done. He's like, wow, everybody looks so good,. Wow, everyone looks great today. It's like everyone got you to don.

He's like, wow, everybody looks so good, not you, Katie. It's like he doesn't say anything to Katie when she comes out in her ancient Greek funeral toga. You know, he's just like, let's that one slide by. Feet. Feet. Okay. It was more of a tunic than a toga,

but either way, I feel like the time period was appropriate. Tunic toga. Okay. It definitely spoke of antiquities. Like, morning during... It was like a very sexy, like, what happened on the way, uh, funny thing happened on the way to the forum outfit, you know.

A mournful thing happened on the way to the forum. Very not funny thing happened on the way to the forum. A very convenient narrative happened on the way to the floor. So Vanderpump's like, oh, look at me. I feel like I'm dressed like a gladiator. Speaking of, yeah, yeah, she says that. She walks out and she deals like a pfft, like with her hand, because I might need it.

I'm ready to sort stuff out. I love each and every one of you. Now don't forget, the truth is coming out today. And the truth is men are right and women are incorrect. They think it's magic. Ariana comes out, uh, basically wearing seat belts, like red seat belts across her body. And Lologa's, ooh, you be hitting different today, girl. He's like,

I'm still waiting for some kind of association to come out against Lolog. I can't believe nobody has said anything yet, but could you please stop it? It's fucking embarrassing. She's like, girl, you better step up the curb with care. I'm like, no Lologa, please stop. So then LVP is like, oh, Ariana, that's a revenge.

Stress if I ever saw it. Oh, we just like best girlfriends. And Andy's like, wow, she's just like Princess Doc. Still too soon. Can we not? Can we not? Too soon. Too soon.

Too soon. Show. Yeah, by the way, I just have to say there was an article out last week. It was like Harry Prince Harry and Meghan Markle they were chased by Papa Rotsie, but they got to where they were safely. I was like, okay guys We don't have to keep on capitalizing off the princess-die stuff. Okay. Yeah, can we just stop? I was it's uncomfortable. I don't like it. So then sand of all of course, is the last one to come to the stage, and he gets the star entrance because they're like, Here he comes, Here he comes, he's coming,

walking, walking, walking past the bathroom, walking past Cameron number three, walking past Cameron number two, and hitting the carpet, give him light, give him light, give him light, Here he comes, Here he comes, Mustache and coming, Mustacheache incoming. Can we get the mouth pain to read? The mouth pain to bring her. They start coming on and like putting mouth all over his face. Yeah. And then it goes, well, he looks like shit. Mama says, I hate sense.

And I loved it because it was so soap dish when Celeste Talbot wins the daytime Emmy at the beginning and it cuts to her co-stars and they go, they're clapping, but smiling and they're like, itch, hagg. I hate her so much. Oh, that was a good Kathy Moriardi, Ronnie. Of course, you know I've got that in my blood. Okay, so count down. Three, two, one.

Here we go, the biggest toy. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no Pomp Rool season 10 reunion joined by Lisa Vanderpump and the gang minus Raquel Levis who is not legally allowed to be in the same room so we found you're a little wagon and put her in the parking lot and then let's go check on Raquel everybody let's check on her there's a trailer and here's Raquel in a trailer which I hope is the place that she will be watching Vanderpump rules from for the rest of her life. I just hope it's somewhere in Arizona. Also, for people who are watching us on video, happy to announce that Rikelle is also watching us on video.

She is on close circuit right now just watching this be- We have filed a restraining order against her, so she is monoled within a hundred feet of us. I love the caption too, below the trailer. It's like trailer, Rikels trailer, a hundred yards away from Sheena. And it's in like a corner of the parking lot. It just looks like, it looks like you should hear like, no, no, no, you know, like you better learn you better learn learn a song Because singing outside nickel machines is probably the only job you're gonna be able to get for a while babe

I feel like France is me dormant is gonna come by and ask for like knock on the door and ask for sugar or something and Check in to see if they're gonna be working at you somebody this summer Is that no manly sleep in cars and shit? Yeah, for some reason I like reference no madland like every week these days and I don't know why. Well, that's probably that's probably what she's working herself into is a no madland moment. I know and I say good riddance by I cannot imagine Raquel working in an Amazon fulfillment center like by the way if if anyone gets the wrong package just blame Raquel because she'd

just be very confused putting things in boxes. This is why no one can get a raise. They're like, it would be like Jeff Bezos' excuse to never give anybody a raise. He's like, really? They want a raise. Show them the camera footage we have of that Rakel girl, please. Sorry, I'm all sitting all over workers rights for a little rekeld joke. I'm just kidding everybody.

Okay, so then we go to, then we go to, uh, back to Andy. He's like, we'll be joining us later, but Lisa, how are you feeling? Lisa, I'm just so glad to be here. I normally don't like reunions, but this one is much needed. Because at this one, I protect two ball sacks that bring a lot of income into my restaurant after losing two in the past few years. So let's just keep it. Let's keep our hearts open to who really matters here. For mentaling, bless you men. Thank you for all of the ribs you've donated to create us

women. Am I right? I This reunion is a jock strap. I am a cup and they are the testicles. I shall protect. Wow, you know, I love me some LVP. I love her, but wow, you talk about missing the mark lady. You really needed to have a good sit down with yourself before you walked in here. It's this whole protecting your investment thing over saying the right thing was really stupid of you. I got the sense she was trying to be like,

wise and unbiased and see it from both sides, but I think that she wound up coming off or just wound up saying things that just were like, big missteps for Lisa Vanderpump. Like it was like, oh Lisa, no, you don't have to do this. You don't have to defend this. What were you talking about this?

I would like to just add, because I was reading this on Reddit and I thought it was a really good comment. It's why someone named the smart girl. Okay, and she's defending Lisa because people were really coming for Lisa last night after this. And she said, LVP defended Lala and her escort work. LVP defended Stasi and her racist shit on the show. LVP defended Shino when people attacked her over how she handled Shia's addiction. LVP defended her when it came to Eddie cheating. LVP defended her when it came to Eddie cheating.

LVP defended Katie when she was called out for being a bully. The only one LVP never defended was Kristen. Now I think this is a great point. LVP does come in and she stands up for the wrong person. Every season. It's not just this time. I will say this time is the most drastic because you have more of a responsibility because you're making even more money off of this prick.

And by excusing this or trying to help minimize the backlash for him and by proxy yourself is just a very bad luck. It's a very bad luck. I think that's the whoever said that Smart Girl, that you are a smart girl, is a smart girl or smart one? It's the underscored smart, underscored girl. The smart girl, you're correct. I think what this shows is that Lisa's basically just a public defender for this cast.

You see it? You see it? They come into court. They're just assigned to her. She's like, all right, what's the case here? Okay, let's see what I can do. I'll try to do my best. You know, she's got like a,

she's dancing the equivalent of the public defender who has like the brown suit and like the tie. That's like a little askew. He's like, your honor. Uh, I would like to make a motion to excuse this temporary insanity. It's like, that's what she is right now. She is.

I think that's such a good comparison. So, I think I'll just hear to protect the poor. Well, at least the poorer than me forever, forever more. All right, who have we got here? All right, which part spray turn do we have loaded up next, darling? As someone who was bullied off her very own show, I just can't see people be railroaded into oblivion. So, um, and he's like,

Ariana, how are you feeling tonight? And she's like, well, as goes, I could be feeling, I guess. I mean, I got a great night's sleep on my cast for mattress. And that's never happened. I'm usually very nervous for reunions. And SantaVal, is this your first time seeing the group since news broke and he's like, ah, yes, Andy. And he's like, how are you feeling? And he's like, ah, Andy, I'm just all over the place to be honest. I really wish I had my clay devolves sweater right now to make me feel better.

And then it just cuts to James Buckering into the camera like squinting and like, oh, look at me down it and so Andy's like she's you this is your first reunion that you're oh no no shorts this is your first reunion not see the next decade how does that feel and shorts goes oh oh yeah I mean I guess it is whoa now that you say it that is strange I mean, I guess it is. Whoa, now that you say it, that is strange. James just turns the law like us. It didn't even cross his mind, did it? Law like cracks up loudly. So shorts is like, yeah, it's kinda sad,

but I'm okay, we put a lot of work into our post-divorced relationship. Kitty is like, I don't agree with that. What the hell are you talking about? It's more like you keep on emailing me and I keep hitting block, block, could he's like, uh, I don't agree with that. What the hell are you talking about? It's more like, you keep on emailing me and I keep hitting block, block, block. How do you keep on getting through my filters? Yeah. And, um, he's like, well, no one cares about you guys anymore. Your storyline was stupid and mostly made up. So, James, now that all the ladies are mad at sandable and

surest, does that mean that you are the number one guy in the group? That's funny. That's a Gal golf act to a long time ago. Remember that jack? That was that that's the funny stuff. My cards. And James is like well it's not that hard to compete when I'm working with Schwartz and a clown. And he goes okay great Katie great to see you love the tunic. Hi L. Yeah, I'm not gonna ask you question Katie. Hi, Lala. What's house ocean? He doesn't ask you a question. Yes, he sits here and asks me I'm telling you it's real. It's real. This isn't us being shady. This is not being like local anti-key this is Andy Literally is like hey Katie nice anyway. Lala. What's going hey Lala, how I heard you got some new Lee Press on nails. Tell me about your cuticles.

Sorry, Kate, he got nothing for you. So funny. So he's like, who's with ocean, your mom? She know, congratulations on the wedding. She know, are you in Brock in the wedding phase? Is the honeymoon phase still? And she's like, yeah, Annie, okay, kind of off all the first Harry Ostrani. And send her, like, yeah, any of them. Okay, kind of all fault one for his higher yester and I and

send a book goes, um, what? I told him he has to keep the hair long to be on the show. I don't know. It's all furious. Oh my god. That haircut they show Brock with that haircut. Good. God, that man is gorgeous.

I love that man. I have to say, I have to say I like to him with longer hair more. I'm not someone who's normally a long hair person, but I really like him. Brock's long hair. God, I love that man. But I was happy to have him. But I was happy to have babies with you

and you not pay for them, darling. Get over here. Get out of my dreams and into my car, so. Yeah. Speaking of ocean. Billy Ocean. So Andy's like, well, obviously the most burning thing on everyone's mind today is who has better boobs?

Kelly Cuoco or Katy Bologna? And then we see Ali being the one to break the news. I saw people. I saw Tom Sandeval dancing with Raquel at the abbey and I was like, that's weird. And then Ken coming into the kitchen and going, I can't believe that Tom Sand of all had Raquel over when Ariana's away. And then I first went to the heart tom and then she slept in the guest room.

So personally, all right, obviously, I was just off going on, I was going to knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock her, go knock it, I'm gonna knock it, Spock out, Spock out! Anyway, gotta go check on the horses. And then, that as they dive into the segment, it cuts to her tell watching, and she literally looks like she's settling into watch full house on DJI F.

Her head, her chin's in her fists, just watching like, oh, my favorite show is on. Yeah, she really does have like grease on that. Yeah, slumber party night. Slumber party, tween energy. Yeah. And you're like, sand of all before we dive in, is there anything you want to say to Ariana

or the group at large? And sand of all is like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, I just want to see the Ariana or the group at large and Santa was like I just Together man, isn't the Oscars fuck you doing You're not a victim. You're not a victim shut the fuck up You shut up like you're not so bad like I said For Christ's what's the tears about let us be let us be okay I'm not a victim. Yeah. We're waiting for change under the freeway.

We're waiting for the break. If I be one of the cool. Fowah, wah, wah, wah, wah. What do you call her? Luckily, stupid. Just that whole side of the room just turns into an audience and just starts booing him. Yeah, booing him and talking over each other and just like completely mocking him. And it is the best that I've ever seen.

It's hilarious. Sandy's like Tom, you have the floor. So he's like, um, I just want to say that I, she everyone. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, like she did not deserve this and like nobody deserves to have it happen. Ariana's like, nothing happened, you did it. I was like, oh, yes, Ariana, right up against making such good points. And then he's like, I'm sorry, but like I did the one thing I said I wouldn't do, and I did it. In the worst way. Well, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, that I'm trying. So now I'm gonna go to despondent PTSD victim. You know, like this has been so traumatized. So he's actually like,

I did it in the worst way possible. I apologize. And James's like, hmm, nah, that didn't hit for me. How about you, Loller? And she's like, I didn't even listen to that shit. So Andy's like, well, what have the conversations been like between you and Tom Ariana and Ariana's like, well, what have the conversations been like between you and Tom, Ariana and Ariana's like, well, he's been, he's victim blame me a hundred percent of the way.

So I don't believe anything that came out of his mouth. I just think he's full of shit and he can fuck off. So Tom, you still are both of you, are you still living in the house? You own together and Tom's like on and off. Yeah. And Ariana rose her eyes. Like, what does that even mean? And he's like, Lala, when you broke up with Randall, you moved.

Do you think it's healthy for them to be in the same home? And she's like, no. Santafas is Randolph. Give it 10 years. He is Randall Emmenitz. He's Randall Emmett's. He's Randall Emmett's. No, Randall is a fucking outwardly racist predator that we've seen.

Like, there's a whole documentary about the sexual harassment and sexual abuse and racism and all that other shit. He's a slime ball piece of shit. You were kind of fine with when he still had money and you were with him back then. This whole rewriting of history like, oh my god, I can't believe I didn't know of this about Randall.

This is crazy. You had everyone sign ND, ND A's he was such a piece of shit. Randall, so please. Randall, we saw that one coming. It's like so blatantly obvious, right? And like, well, I have to just get that out there now, because I don't want to be a hater of the whole recap, because frankly, Lala's so good in this episode, and I think this is like her reunion.

I mean, I think this is like kind of her season in a way. Her and James are killing it. They're getting their revenge on people who, you know, they're getting a revenge on a cast who's been shitty to them. And like, it's finally their turn to be this way, so I kind of get it. But I just want to point out that all of this that Tom has done does not excuse everything that YouTube have done. Like the audience doesn't just completely forget.

And so stop acting like you're the biggest fucking victims in the room. I also felt like this was her subtle way of being like, excuse me, I'm in a scandals too. So anyone wanna like, you know, like address the fact that I'm in a scandal is like, this is not the only scandal happening. No, she's sort of like elevating herself up into it. So, you're absolutely right.

And she gave an interview earlier this week where she was saying, she feels a little disappointed in the audience because the audience is having this reaction for Ariana but nobody had that reaction towards her. And I was like, yeah, because Ariana was it knowingly dating someone like Randall. Like a pig. Like it was a surprise pig. Not a... And then holding the pig.

Right. And then holding like the private plane over people and just like acting all holier than now because of the power they were getting from this obvious trash human being that they were sucking dry. You know what I mean? Plus Lala's whole career on Vannapump rules has been her storyline being upstage by someone else having just a bigger version

of her storyline. I thought of you saying that while I watch it. So I was like, this is Ben's Lala theory coming into play yet again, coming true. Every single time, like, good, bad, anything that happens with her, like engagement, pregnancies, deaths, cheated on. Someone just always has it just a little bit bigger

and she just always is just ever. And it was double. It was double this year for her because it starts, she got the Randall thing first, but then by the time they were shooting Katie left Schwartz, yeah, she had already been stood up once this season and then she got stood up the ultimate way by the reunion Yeah, so ultimately Lala says that like she's like yeah, it's crazy because Randall like I couldn't like she was never around And then once I said I want to leave him I couldn't get him out of the fucking house.

And that's like what a narcissist does. And everyone needs to be warned about sand of all because he is that person. And he is a dangerous human being. So Lisa's like, oh, it was the bear. Wait, hello, clocking in, but Lisa, Lisa van der Bump DA, or not DA, public, not DA, but whatever the,

whatever the, Objection, objection, all right, least of them, the public council for the poor here, all right? Yeah. Dangerous, that is a character assassination, that should not be allowed leading the jury, darling. Lala's like, well, I didn't ask for anyone's opinion because, well, you have my opinion. Just like you have magic. And so

lullaby. Well, that's great. I reject it. I reject your opinion. Well, good for you for doing that because Lisa Vanderpump is full of shit with this. Now, I do think saying dangerous. Okay, first of all, a couple of things. Randall Emmett was suddenly all the time home because he was in the news all over the place after cheating on you Because that was also the same time that he was broke He owed people all these months this money. He was being sued by all these people the all the sexual allegations started coming out He'd literally could not leave the house. That's why he was there. Is he a narcissist?

Fuck yes. He's a trash human being an anarchist is Tom sandable the same I don't think so. Still fucking terrible though. So I'll give you that. I think it's probably a, I think Sandibault's probably a narcissist. I think it's an art. And I think also there is an element of him taking advantage of Raquel because I don't know what's going on with Raquel,

but she seems like a lot like some kind of, there's something going on where either she's lost, she's got addiction issues, she's completely goalable, she's completely gullible, she's completely in a depression hole, whatever the hell's going on, this creepy older man, yeah, I don't think it's necessarily safe either. I don't know where I am on this,

I'm all over the place on this. I don't feel like Tom Sandevol's as predatory as Randall Emmett, and Randall Emmett's also in a position of greater power, and he's able to really do a lot of terrible things to people, not to terrible people. So, I guess, but you could still say that Sandival is dangerous in the fact that he can still fuck with people's emotions and that's a dangerous thing to do. Either way, I think it was based. The compelling thing about her argument and putting these things together and making the comparison is that it puts us

in the situation of being like, well, wait a minute, if you say anything about this, you're somehow defending Sandival. Which I'm not gonna do. That cuts a total sand of all. Which, I'm not going to do. That cuts a total piece of shit. So she's actually very smart to smooth that she's making. Like conflating the two men is actually very smart for Lala because it makes it like you can't question anything coming out of your her mouth

or you're standing up for one of these pieces of shit. And I'm not about to do that. So why don't I just shut the fuck up? Well, I think that, and I'm assuming is actually at least a van der Pum, not to be an apologist, but I think that least of van der Pum is like, whoa, Randall Emmett is like, like deep scum of the earth in like many different dimensions.

And Tom Sandevol is scum of the earth in only, in a few different dimensions, but not as many as Randall Emmett. So it's not a fear of comparison. I think that's what she's trying to do. But honestly, I think this is one of those moments where Lisa should have just like, just let it go. Like this, because now you look really bad, you look like you're really comparison, I think that's what she's trying to do. But honestly, I think this is one of those moments where Lisa should have just let it go. Because now you look really bad.

You look like you're really defending Sandevol, who's really indefensible. So. And you've put yourself in the absolute wrong place. Like she got trapped in this, right? Because there's no right way to say, you can't say that he's, you can't say that about somebody. Because Tom's so in the wrong,

standing up for him in any way is just not gonna work for you. And it also put her in the bad place of now the cast can say, fuck you to Lisa, who's like the boss. And her credibility is diminishing. Ruined. Ruined, the whole role in the show. I agree.

And I think this is just not the, this is not the forum to try to argue, sort of philosophical ideas of what makes someone dangerous. You know, when you're arguing with Lala on a reunion, like it's just never gonna work out. So Lisa should have just like dropped it and let them say it and let them all get it off their chest

and have their moment because that's really what needs to be, needs to happen. It's for people just to yell at sand of all and like let off the steam. But I understand, because I even fell into the trap just right here on the podcast, talking about something that's already happened.

Oh, there you go. I fell into the same hole. I was like, hey, a minute. Let's talk about who's worse. Sand of all are Emmett. You know, they both trash his trash. I'm trash his trash. At the end of the day, they're both in the trash bucket.

So while they're both at the fucking curb, waiting to be picked up. Yes. So Lala's basically like, you know, he's like, he's like sleeping next to his life partner. Like that's, if he can do that, like that's, there's something wrong with him and at least is like, but a lot of people have done that before

and they're not dangerous people and Lala's like, they aren't dangerous, ah, sand of all, it's like Lala, if you're going to judge my character, They're not dangerous people and not like they are dangerous Santa was like Lala if you're going to judge my character you need to get in line You know and she's like oh you shut the box apps you shut the box apps and Santa was like yeah Get in the back of the line all right and I'll be piece of yelling comb down and she says I'm not gonna come stance And she goes we're here for 10 hours for God's sake, darling. Please don't talk like this. Oh, darling, it's a long time.

Ken is there waiting, you cannot do this to him. So Andy's like, Arianna, you start off the year by saying how you and Sandeval were not spending quality time together. Do you think that's what caused this divide? And she's like, no, I think he caused the divide in the relationship because he was fucking other people. Okay. Then she tries again.

LVB tries again. What are you doing later? She's like, I did not like this at all. She goes, oh, well, other people is very different than Rukkel. And Ariana's like, oh, don't worry, it's not just Rukkel. And then we see the clip of Sheena being like, flowers, Miami girl, the first time you chewed up.

And he's like, there was one other time. Which also he had his trademarked lying eyes in that. So God knows how many times it really was. And Ariana's like, that fucker is that fault because he's the one who made all these choices. And Andy's like, sandable, what do you think caused the demise? And he's like, well, like slowly over time, like our communication or connection slowly dissipated. And Andy's like, well, had he discussed those things with you. And Ariana's like, well, of course, over time, we've had, it's not like we don't have conversations, you know, and so Andy's like,

but Tom said you had been intimate in years and we're kind of glorified roommates at certain point. This is what I loved because this was pissing me off too. I'm like, what are these questions? What is, what do you think caused these problems? What do you mean these problems? He fucked where Kelly, he fucked his girlfriend's best friend. What do you mean, mean these problems? He fucked her, he fucked his girlfriend's best friend. What do you mean, what caused it?

He fucked her, who cares what? He made a bad choice. Like why are you trying to make it some relationship thing that somebody else is responsible for? It doesn't matter. It's their relationship sucked and she didn't touch him for years. It's not the point, you know?

And so I like that area on it was like, that's not true, we have an intimate. Also having intimacy issues does not excuse literally any fucking thing you work on it or you break up so going through the into now to our relationship is fucking pointless and James goes yeah it's pointless stupid pointless and she goes yeah it's victim blaming and sorts is like guys guys we're all in agreement here there's zero justification for this and she's's like, where are the reunion though? Is supposed to be like therapy.

And Ariana's like, it is not like therapy. Talk space. Now that's therapy. And you can do it in your own time. From even your car. Mm. So, uh, Sarin is, and he's like, okay, okay, I just wasn't,

I'm just trying to get at what the state is of your relationship. And, Ariana's like, well, the state of our relationship is this, what you're seeing right here. And he's like, well, so did the rest of the group sense that there were significant issues in the relationship? And Shina finally gets to talk. She's like, um, like, not until like more recently, and like, Lola and I had a conversation with me saying like, she really thought something was like

going on between like, him or her calendar, like after that, like I sat down with like, Ariana and like from the sounds of it, like, everything seemed great. And like, had been like, everything, but like very smooth and like normal. And like, they had been like, very intimate in the month, month, and their communication was better. And they're like in a very good place in their eyes, believe they were like listening to good as gold every single day. So I think everything was God. I love that once you said, um, they were so intimate that month. It's just Rikael pops up on the screen like, they were like, wait a minute, this isn't

what Tom told me. I can't believe it. Would Tom lie to a paralegal? I have a blazer now. Okay. I have a blazer now. Okay, so that conversation would law happen after filming it wrapped and yes it was in January. So Andy is like, so once you start your relationship with Raquel, why not come clean to Ariana? And your friends, and your friends, she know who I am, Tom, do you know who I am? I'm just, yeah, you're James mother fucking Kennedy. And he goes, oh, who I am, Tom. Do you know who I am? I go, yeah, you're James' mother fucking Kennedy.

And he goes, oh, what is that to you? And I hope LVB goes, James darling. All right, listen, call it. I think Ariane is a little more important right now. All right, what was this? What is this, James? What have you done to your face, Buzz Light here? What's going on over?

James is just like, oh really? You hurt me. You were like a bro, bro. Yeah, Ariane's like, yeah James is just like oh really? You hurt me. You were like a bro bro. Yeah, Ariane's like yeah, there were like brothers and sandals like we were like brothers I told you like once a month dude and while I was like yeah, and let's not forget Raka was his fjansisk. And she was like I'm hello, I read how it was like my best festival. I was not first of all that era, I was like, I'm raising. And James says, oh wow, not my brother, not my brother.

Oh yeah, you paid for half his engagements. What are you talking about? And Santa was like, I know, bro. And James says, you've been a big bro to me. He says, well, that is what you call me yet. Okay, Tom, really? It's so rude. It's not so fucking rude.

You paid for that. You paid thousands of dollars for that thing and then you go act like you weren't his big bro. Yeah, that's. Tom is just so gross. But by the way though, I have to say, like as entertaining as James was, he was kind of annoying me because I did feel like

this was a moment for Ariana and Tom and James kept kind of like budding in. Like he was the one who was most like hurt by this whole situation. And like yes, he was hurt. But it kind of bothered me that I felt like he was not letting Ariana have moments with like, there were moments where it was for her to answer a question

or for her to express herself. And James would button and be like, yeah, what about me? What about me? I was hit too. Well, in this instance, she jumped in like, well, he considered him a brother. Like she, I think she's having that whole team behind her,

just being like, fuck you. You know, like every time they booed, she booed along with them. I think, I mean, I think she's actually like, let's, we're teaming, you know, we're teaming right now and it's good. But it was annoying me too, because James and Lala are both, I mean, the second this whole thing happened,

they were in every comment section of every article that was posted on Instagram, being like, oh, that pig, bleb bleb bleb, making it all about themselves, you know, and trying to like center themselves, you know, and like, he's making sand of all songs and all of his shows that are being put out all over the internet. And she's making every podcast about him

and every like, send it to Darryl. Like they're both capitalizing so hard, which is their show, they're allowed to. But it's just like you guys are going so hard, you won't shut up. It's not even your plot line. And you've both done, you've both been such shit people. Like, I mean, it's weird seeing people cheer James on to this degree when James is still

at heart an abusive piece of shit and we can't forget that. You know what I mean? James is still like the calling girls fat sluts and, you know, God knows what he put Rick L through before any of this even happened. So that's what kind of makes this show uncomfortable in general, doesn't it? It's like whenever you're rooting for somebody, it's like, they're usually trash.

I mean, nine times a half turn, you're gonna be rooting for trash on this show. But that being said, I don't actually mind so much them capitalizing off of it as much as I just, James getting so angry, James being the one getting into a fight or whatever. I don't know, I kind of felt like, I was like, that's kind a fight or whatever. I don't know, I kind of felt like, I was like, that's kind of Ariana's place.

I don't know, you can be an angry, you can be annoyed, but I felt like, James, James is his rage. I mean, let's admit, I mean, he was co-cooked. Let's be honest, so it was also co-craged. But I just kind of felt like he was upstaging Ariana in a way that I was like, no, let's have Ariana be the one who takes the lead with the crazy rage.

And I do think that Ariana liked them having her back like that. It was like, yeah, it's all of us against you. And not in a bad way as in like, you've heard all of us and now we're coming for you. So I think she definitely liked that. But I just know, I don't know. There were just times where I felt like James,

like, could you be quiet for a second because I want to hear Arianna has to say Yeah, so he's like well It just goes to show what a bad friend you are you opportunist and sound of it's like opportunist You fuck Christian to get on the show five days after we broke up Which I mean I was like point he has to think about running like that point I was like point he has to think about Ronnie like that point. So it's a point. But I also get James's point of like I was 21.

Like how long are you gonna hold shit against me? I was 21 years old and you're 40. And Santa Bob goes, and you use my condoms. And then James is like charging him like he's gonna fight him. And Santa Bob's like, get him out of my face. And then Andy's in between them like. And Rick tells you know, reaching up like guys, it And then Andy's in between them, like, and Rick Hell's, you know, reaching up. Like, guys, it's like, Andy's in the Rose parade,

like trying to mediate a fight between Garfield and Mickey Mouse floats. You know, it's like, come on guys, we're all, we're all, we're all, we're all, we're all. It's like, it's chaos. And he's like pulling James away. James is like, definitely like, cooked out. He's like, his maroon suit's like flying all over the place.

And then like Andy drops his card. This is what the card moment happens. And then we're telling the trailer goes, oh no. And he's like, my cards. My cards. And he's like trying to find his cards just genuinely upset, right? And sound of like, I stood up for you. And James is like, to find his car just genuinely upset, right?

And sound of a like I stood up for you. And James is like, oh fuck you. I don't want you to stand up for me pussy. You're a clown Yeah, well, I want to guess everybody for you dude. Is that can you know what your band sucks dick? You're nothing. I've played for cascade You back stabbing ho So then, Santa Claus is- Because I'm a back-stopping ho. Oh, no. And Santa Claus gets my face again, and I will f*** you up. So then James is up and out of the seat again, charging.

So this time, he's like, oh, f*** you up, bitch. Oh, f*** you up, bitch. So now, Lisa and And you're both up trying to pull people away. I mean, Lisa is standing up trying to pull people I mean where was Peter by the way this hello Peter you're supposed to be off to the side ready to jump in hello I've got a Peter's trying to have his own moment online being like we too Vanderpump doesn't want me to succeed Everybody else but me. Oh, what if I open my own restaurant? What should it be called multiple choice? Mike Peter Stop like even on even when I just started pony cafe. Everything's just starters. No. And

everybody wears ponytails. Like what? The way there's all wear ponytails. Starters and ponies. That's what did James say here? Because then they get pulled apart and James said that I weigh more ripped than you bro. That's the best part. And then Andy goes, actually, you won't. You stay in your fucking chair. Stay in the chair, James. And James says, I'm gonna go pee, you pussy bitch. You're a worm with a mustache.

I wouldn't want James to miss his mid-morning rail. I mean, he's probably been sitting here for like an hour. So God forbid, you know. So he walked him off then he turns around and goes, you ugly fucking worm. And he also did this pan did thing by the way, when Andy was like, just stand your chick

as boy, he said it first, I said it first. And then Santaval goes, Santaval goes. What you call yourself an artist? You have the same haircut for nine years. And goes oh, yeah, it works for me, bro I love that that's like that is sand of all's like measurement of an art of artistry is like how many time do you change your hair? Sanable is like objection as Council for the pool. I would like object to the use of the Lisa Rina argument. Thank you

Sense and of all tries again to have a sick burn. He goes James P's on a fire hydrant like a dog And then like that's the dogs like fire hydrant because the dog the dog what did this on it? What does this mean? Did you get that? I didn't get this one. I think he was trying to say something about like, like that James thinks that like he's the only one who could have Raquel. Like James is all upset because

Sandivall had sex with Raquel, but it kind of got lost in the bad delivery of the sick burn. Well, yeah, it's not a sick burning, there's pretty gross one. I was like, so then Lala's like, sand evolves, sand evolves, listen. We've all bucks, ups, all right? And he goes, I get that, I get that.

And then he goes, just, she just, so stop bringing up stuff from 500 years ago. This is your life partners, okay? And he goes, what does this have to do with James Kennedy? And she's like, cause you brought up questions from like 500 years ago. This is your life partners, okay? And he goes, what does this have to do with James Kennedy? And she's like, because you brought up Christians from like 500 years ago. That's why, okay? Step up the carbs and you get your act together, broth. Yeah, that was supposed to be your whites, okay? This was supposed to be your life partners, okay? And you've done fucked up, okay? You've done fucked up. You'd stop? No, she doesn't say you.? And you've done fucked up, okay? You've done fucked up.

You stopped, no, she doesn't say you, she goes, you done fucked up. Sorry. Baby boy, I'm like, oh, no. I'm like, literally every time. I'm like, Bravo, haven't you gotten in enough trouble? Like you don't have anybody on set saying like, oh, long, long, could we stop appropriating

a appropriation and- That's really hard to do in Finland. A appropriation, AA, appropriation. Anyway, Andy's like, sand of all, okay, well, I asked, to be fair, I asked, and sand of all, once you start your relationship with Rickel, why did you not come clean to Ariana right then? Is just that the words come just clean,

is just a little scary, that concept. And let me while a producer is calming down James, I'm like, all right, James, just remember, use your words, not your fists. And James goes, tell him, he can't beat my ass, I can beat his ass, you better tell him that. And so he comes back and, and he's like, James, do me a favor.

Oh yeah, I'll be calling to Tweedle D and Tweedle Dick over there. And Swartz goes, uh, am I Tweedle D? And Katie's like, okay, just say whatever you want. Just stay in your seat. And James is like, right, ugly fuck. He's like, uh, excuse me. Did you just call me an ugly fuck? He's like, no, Andy, you're handsome.

You're handsome and you're ripped like me. He's the ugly fucking one. Oh, and he's like, okay, let's see, and you see it. Oh, you'll be in your dressing room. You won't be on stage, young man. And he goes, oh, for a time out, who gave me a bottom spank by Lisa Vendor Bob? Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr I'll start laughing. I was like, well, Lisa really lost. They really take him that steering wheel away from Lisa this year. You're like, no. James is like, yeah, oh, I got a spank ultimate lunch time.

I spank for home. I spank for home. All right, all right. Come down. But you're gonna spank me with this little four-year-old cookie-coc. So what are you gonna do? So they're cracking up and he's like, all right. So scams, let me try this again. Sandelo, why wouldn't you come clean to Ariana? And he's like, Andy, obviously I was scared to because like obviously, she's going through a lot of the time and I didn't want to add anything to that. And Andy's like, well, this $6 million question, when did

sand of all confide in you shorts? And here we go, someone please pull out a wooden board and get a piano tinklin' because shorts is about to tap dance. Hit it, bro! Oh, well, so like starting in July, he'd been confiding in me that he wasn't happy and then all this shit and around that time, like after guys, he confided in me,

but he also confided in Raquel and I was like, wow, confiding in Raquel, like that's pretty intimate. And then I think around that time, I think was there like an Avengers movie or an Ant-Man that came out, so I went and saw a movie. And then like I went and I ordered from Panda Express. Oh, it was Orange Chicken Time. No, it says to me chicken.

Oh, it's a limited time menu item. It was so good, but then afterwards, I was like, really, it's your high trade. It's a, I had to go to 7-Eleven and get myself some water, smart water. Does it make smart decisions? What was the question again? It's like nice job there, buddy.

Sorry, I was like, by the way, when Charlotte's body was an even fucking cold, and then we see the clip of her finding out that her dog had to be put down in Vegas and crying, and Schwartz was like, yeah, but I didn't know that in the moment. I mean, he said he confided in her. Can you guess?

Um, Mike confided in her. Do you mean he put his penis inside of her? Sick burn, sick burn. You can try that Katie sickburn at something about her. It's a jalapeno on white bright sound, which. So, no crusts. So Katie's busy shorts is doing this whole song and dance about whatever.

And Katie's like, can you just say when you told you that you were fucking, can you just say it? I can get down to it. And he's like, oh, I think it was late. It was late August Yeah, cuz I met up with Tom and he broke it down for me and Santa was like It's kind of furious eyes. He's like Late August after the wedding that's when you told me he's like

So mad cuz shorts is totally going off script now listen, you have to put fear into shorts He's gonna follow the person who scares him the most and it's Katie. We all know it's Katie Don't try and get into a mean war with Katie. She will scare the shit out of anybody before Sam is Lala's like, oh, did you guys not put your timelines together? And then we see a clip of Andy with Tom, you know, flashback to yesterday. And he's like, so what did you tell Schwartz? And Santa was like, I would say lie eyes, lie eyes, mid to late January, Andy.

And then cut back. And Arianna is like, huh, I know you had to coach the rattle day yesterday. So you didn't get to coach this one. Oh, I think that's a, that's a recal in the trailer doing the raspberry thing, which is wow. God, this episode of Step by Step is really taking a dark turn. So then we go to the Mexico kiss. And he asks in Mexico, when you kissed Recal and shorts, he says, did you not, did you not think of... What did he say? He said, he has something about kissing Raquel.

Mm-hmm. I don't know. He said, like, did you know? Did you not know? No, did you not know? I wrote, did you not know what I spelled no NL? Really? And he's over here.

And he's like, you know, there's a moment in one of the later episodes and you say to him, I have this gut feeling that she kind of has a crush on someone else. Like, were you talking about that situation and Schwartz goes, yeah, honestly, yeah. I think it like subconsciously is why I brought it up. I was like, you're such a dick. You brought you, I mean, like, it's weird that I'm saying you're a dick for blowing up your friend's spot for being a dick, but you are being a dick to your best friend.

You're basically trying out his affair on camera, which is like, a lot of fucking with them. He's like fucking with them, right? He's fucking with them saying, dude, I mean, I think it's just obvious. I think he's thinking it's just obvious and this is gonna fuck them up and he's, he Tom me to do something about it.

I think that he's being like, dude, hello. Do something because you're about to fucking ruin our whole business, you know. So then, sorry, Ariana's like grossed out. Ariana's looks. I mean, so she's like, every time it cussed her, she's giving some other kind of dirty look. And she's like, listen you guysaster she's giving some other kind of dirty luck. And shorts is like listen you guys.

I'm not an idiot, okay? And Lisa goes, oh, you know, I mean, it's like Nick Lane saying I'm not talented with lightery. You know what I'm saying? So shorts, shorts says that they got drunk in a hot tub, and that's when Sandival told them in the hot tub that they had a one-night stand. And you know that, then Sandival said all the typical things, like, oh my god, what have I done?

I made such a huge mistake, like the whole spiel. And then she goes, um, excuse me, what's this like more after glamping and shorts like it was before. And then we get the glamping flashback of shorts saying, Raquel has a type, men that are taken, ah. So he's like, yeah, there was no doubt about that when the conversation happened.

You know, and then during the fall, they spent an inappropriate amount of time together, which of course is because they were done filming so they were just being brazen at this point, thinking they got away with it. All they had to do was just get through the reunion. Obviously, no one's going to call them out, right? So then Andy is like, Tom, why were you encouraging Schwartz to make out with Raquel after you had sex? Was it a decoy? And he's like absolutely not when that happened that could never happen again in shorts like I don't know I mean I don't know bro And Lisa van der prom's like it's my

Carb darling. It's first To encourage your best friend to make out with someone you just slept with that is what are called with someone you just slept with, that is what I call ratings gold. Everyone takes that out. It's a table without flowers on top. What a horror show. How could you darling?

So, and then Katie has a good theory. She's like, it was a great way to distract away from the affair. I mean, it wasn't a good, we're all saying that. We're all saying that. But like, it was at that time when it was being filmed, I'm glad she said that. So Andy is like, sand of all, you said you started cheating on Ariana

because things have been so bad in your relationship, but my amy girl was early in your relationship. So how do you explain that? If you, basically here's a new plate, if you'd like to put some fresh bowl, should on it be my guest. Oh, I don't know. I just like not felt single in my years. And so I wanted that feeling

again before I got serious. So I cheated on area on early. So I didn't have to cheat on her later. Like it's called being prepared in a relationship. I mean, you're welcome, Ariana. You don't get to do that. Like just, oh, you don't, you didn't get, you haven't felt single in five years. Just wanted to have a taste of it. That that. Like just, oh, you didn't get, you haven't felt single in five years, just wanted to have a taste of it. That's not how that, well, it could be how it works, if that's how your relationship is set up, but that is a piss poor excuse for cheating.

Like, oh, what was Tom? He hadn't felt what it was like to be single in five years. Yeah, that's the key relationship. Yeah, but also, he had a relationship. Well, I know that Chris and his dad, I don't know if he said this, but Chris and said that they cheated on each other all the time and that their relationship was a mess.

So, no, it wasn't your first time feeling single, because you'd been cheating the whole time you were with Chris, Ed. Yeah, so Andy asked Ariana about Miami girl, like why were you willing to forgive him about that? And she says at that time, they weren't really exclusive, or it wasn't as serious,

and she saw the rest of her life with Tom and she just wanted everyone to see the best in him and because that's what she saw at the time. And then Santa was like, yeah, and during that time, Kristen was like on a rampage and I was like, no one cares about Kristen, okay? We're not talking about Kristen. Yeah, but then he is a guy loser, you fucking loser.

Bisc, bisc. Just to point out, again, I thought we weren't allowed to bring up the history books from eight years ago. I thought that everything from eight years ago was completely irrelevant, James. So you're kind of going back on your own argument, but okay, it's still fun. I'd still love that you're yelling at the sound of all, but why is it not okay for him to go back to history, but it's okay for you to go back to history? That is true. It's just hypocrisy, but I'm on their side, obviously.

Me too, but you know, you gotta point it out. So it's a point, it's good to point it out. Well listen, we're keeping score in a very important super bowl of our lives, all right? How to put it up there on the board, go ahead. So Santa Claus, like, listen, dude, like we just were not like, look, because Lala says, see, it just proofs that you haven't changed. And Santa Claus, like, look, we're not like, look, because Lala says, see, it just proves that you haven't changed.

And Santa Claus was like, I wasn't like, with Miami Girl, like, we're not like best friends or something like that. And Lala got Lala's, okay, so when you're not that serious, you don't fuck the best friends, but when you are committed, then we fuck the best friends. Got it. Got it. Yeah. So, Ariana's laughing. She's like, yeah, there you go.

And Sandevolg is a furious glare. He's like, I'm trying to cry furiously, but I'm also confused. I hope this is reading to everybody in home. So then Andy is like, we're back. Oh, by the way, just because we just went to a commercial break, I just wanted to announce. So I have a friend here in Austin, one of my little besties over here, who knows this girl that was supposedly hooking up with Sandival here in Texas in Austin, because Sandival

came and played beauty Texas a couple of weeks ago and was seen around with this blonde girl. And everyone's like, oh my god, it's this new blonde. And it's this new girlfriend. He's totally of a Requel. So this is what this girl posted yesterday on her social. She went dark the minute this, I'm sorry I'm putting on so much lip gloss, by the way, working on my lip exfoliation,

and I'm talking a lot today. Oh wow. So she posted on her and staff are going dark since this all happened. She said, anxiety tip, if you hang out with a famous person, be prepared that someone will likely take your picture, sell it to the tabloids, but your face on blast. I'm assuming you just didn't spell check that.

Tell everyone you're dating and give you the worst anxiety you've ever experienced. Thank you to my closest friends for being there and checking on me right now. PS, I'm not dating Tom. PSS, find better hobbies. You find a better fucking hobby. You're the one hanging out with Matthew Tom all over fucking town. Don't get mad at us. Weirdo. Yeah. I love when people make statements to be like, stop talking about this as they put out a statement on social media. Sorry, I know famous people. Sorry.

Sorry, I know terrible people. So Andy's like, well, it's easy to forget that before sand of all on Rikkel's affair, this group was dealing with three seismic breakups. Lala and Randall, which I'm putting first on the list of that way by the time we get to the end and let's you'll forget about it. Sorry, Lala, James and Rquel, and Katie in Schwartz!

Katie, after 12 years being with Schwartz, oh by the way, sorry James and Lala, I'm not going to ask you about your breakups. Katie, after 12 years being with Schwartz, what was it that made you realize it was the end of the road? Was it when we showed footage of him swimming in a river right before your nuptials? And she's like, well stepping outside of my life for a moment and realizing I wasn't happy and that he prioritized everyone else over me. Like that was like the end for me and shorts was fine. By necessity.

Okay. In the moment like, sorry, okay, sorry. I'll let you talk. I'll let you talk. It's like, thanks for thanks for being a, I love. Never mind. I can't make an articulate comment right now. I have nothing that I'm holding back. I just know I can't form my words properly,

so I'm just gonna move on. I was like, but it was Necessa, it was the bar. And she goes, um, it was parties, it was strangers in the room. I mean, listen, it was everybody, Andy. He prioritized literally everybody over me, and I had to make a choice that I didn't want to make. So then Swartz comes in with his big victim pitch

for the day. He's like, well, you know, it wasn't like a huge surprise because the intimacy was dwindling, but it was like the worst moment of my life because I was almost losing my father. My brother had cancer. I was running out of money. I mean, I was really in it. I was almost losing my father, my brother had cancer, I was running out of money. I mean, I was really in it.

I mean, that being said, I would never expect Katie to put her feelings on hold and just stay with me out of pity, which, you know, this was also like, I'm a huge victim man and I can't believe she would do this to me. But he's also like, excuse me, she did leave me at like the worst moment of my fucking life. Okay. But no. But no. Sitting here crying about it, except that you are sitting here crying about it. Right. So you just invalidated your own, the man is the one who deserves the sympathy. Well, he's doing that to build a short thing of like, yeah, no, who's just a terrible time for me. And oh, things were terrible in my life, but no, no, she should have done it. Like, I wouldn't want her to stab me out of pity,

just because, you know, my dad almost died and ran out of money and there's crocodiles from the Nile and Florida now that are eating people, but no, no, no, no, no, but it was good. She left me at a terrible time, but I don't hold that against her. She just has to live with that. But it's fine. It's fine. So Andy gets into the, you had an agreement not to hook up with anyone in the friend group, which he didn't hook up with anyone in the friend group, but whatever. And Katie is like, yeah, I mean, you went to the listen, I set that boundary blah, blah, blah. We've heard this before, right? And then Schwartz is like, that was reasonable. But for the record,

if she had done that, I wouldn't care. It's just like a little rich like you were having sex and hooking up with people when we were still living together. You didn't think that hurt me? Okay, sure, Tom. If that's gonna be your argument, I could see that. Katie leaves you at the hardest time in your life. Okay? That's when she decides to drop the bomb that she's leaving.

Then she starts fucking dudes in your marital home while you're still there. Okay, Tom, did that hurt your feelings? I get it, Tom. That's an argument that you make at the time and say, I'm not going to agree to not dating our friend group. You're hurting my feelings and I'm going to date where the fuck I want to. You don't get to pull that out a year later and become some victim. You were the one who agreed to it in the first place

and you were the one who fucked it up. And you know how fucking pissed off I am that you're making me stand up for Katie right now. I'm very rarely in this position that you, sir, are not the victim here. Okay. You're time to complain about being a victim was while this was all happening. Not after you were publicly taunting Katie on national TV and being an asshole and publicly humiliating her in Mexico and all the other shit you did.

Not the time, sir, and I hate you for making me make that argument. Thank you, the defense rests for the public defender of people I'd normally would not be defending. The law firm of Karim and Vandipump. The law firm of I don't like you, but I'm defending you anyway because God damn it, I'm making minimum wage doing it.

Yeah, he made a deal that he couldn't keep up with. You know, like it's not about whether or not, like it was a reasonable deal. The point is that he still said he would do it and then he didn't do it. So Katie's basically like, yeah, I stop with people, was it anyone you know? Anyone you know?

No, I don't think so. So she was like, you could have had sex with someone too, just not in the group. So shorts is like, you could have had sex with someone too, just not in the group. So shorts is like, oh, the friend code is murky. And Katie's like, okay, don't think you can have that opinion since you were chatting on, like you were cheating on me while we were together. I don't think you can say that

because you were cheating on me. And then the proof of this is a clip from 2014 where she is like, or where she, where Katie's saying, she said you were making out with someone and he goes, and that's not bullshit. Okay, but again, this clip is from 2014. So are we allowed to pull out the history books or not? Because this is another eight year old clip.

So you guys kinda need to get that argument together because you're making me crazy over here. I'm totally down with that, like I'm down with the Tom's, don't get to pull out the history book But everyone else does because I just think that's more fun It might not be balanced, but it's just more fun. It's more fun that every time they try to go But they think I could build like don't go into the past Something like I'm super furious about I just think it's funny, because this cast is so foolish.

They're all so foolish. You know, they're all such fucking hypocrites about it. It's like every time they say something to defend themselves, like, you can't bring up the past, and then they bring up the past in every single argument. So short as basically, like, well, just so you know, like if the roles were reversed, you know, and I started dating and hooking up with people,

you know, while you were living under the same roof. Like, and then six months later, you like, you like, kiss Peter in Mexico. Like, do you think that like, I would have a like to stand on to be upset with you for that? And she's like, you know, Katie is sort of like, you good, so Katie's like, oh, he has a point. So she's like, you're not the victim of this.

Okay, quiet. She goes darling, I'm telling you, you don't have a leg on to stand on in this. And he's like, I'm just saying there's a double standard. No, there's not. And also, I'm so sick of you too. Your relationship was toxic, your marriage was stupid. You never should have been together.

I'm so fucking sick of both of your negative, whiny little asses. I'm sick of watching you on this show. And this plot line was made up in stupid anyway. Shorts didn't even barely do anything with Raquel. And we all know that now. We all know what was really going on. Why do we have to talk about it?

Just FF darling. FF. And he's like, so say, Andy Vo, what do you think about this? And Ariana's like, well, he thinks it's perfectly appropriate to fuck one of my closest girlfriends. So I think it's a silly question to ask him. He said, I was like, no, I don't think it's appropriate. And then Arianna's like, well, you did it a lot.

So it's like, but it doesn't mean I thought that what I did was appropriate. It's just like, you know, like, you were nice to me, Arianna. So shorts is like, I'm sorry, I hurt your feelings. I'm sorry, I did it. Like, but somehow that kiss was liberating. So like wow.

I'm so sorry, but oh my God, I never felt better. Wow, I'm really sorry I hurt your feelings, but I feel like when the little mermaid got her legs and she was able to talk and marry the prince at the end, this is amazing. So, Lala's like, how sick do you felt that way? And her, and her like the whole time was like, fucking your best friend. Like, this is like sick right now. And Santa was like, it was a one night stand before became a multiple night stand, okay?

Like, so it's a lot different than an ongoing thing which it did become so like, shut up. And Vanderpump's like, it's a lot different than an ongoing thing which it did become so like shut up And Vanderpump's like it doesn't matter. It changed the whole relationship and then your best friend is making out with her There's something strange about that all right. I'm not gonna let that one. That is weird and then he's like can I make a point about something? You're a group of cheaters James you slept with Chris and oh mate yeah in in my early 20s he's a 40 year old man And he's based like excuse me. I'm trying to read you off or fill up here James you slept with christen while she and Sandevol were filled together Ariana you cheated with sand of all while Tom was with christen and shorts you made out with literally everyone when you were married with Katie and James

Allala you had sex with each other despite being relations with other people when you were married with Katie and James Allala, you had sex with each other, despite being in relations with other people. No one in this group has clean hands, except for Katie and the Savannah bomb, but honestly, who really knows? So I mean, look, you're all prepared to come after Santa Vaughan Rekel,

but how was that not hypocritical? Seriously. And I think he already knows the answer. Like, we all know the answer, which Lala says, but she's like, none of us was fucking our best friends, man, that's what it is. Which I think Andy note, I think Andy was just like, I just wanted to remind people

of how amazing this show really is. It's very rich with this tree. Please go rewatch on P-Dog. I also, you know, it's kind of amazing. Why did it not come up, or maybe it will come up? Why did Andy never say something like, hey, sand of all, Kristen, there was a time when Kristen was you in the situation.

Kristen slept with Jacks. I mean, it wasn't an ongoing thing, but she slept with Jacks twice, and Jacks was your best buddy, and that was so hurtful to you. How did you not reflect on how this could be so hurtful to Ariana? Yeah, model.

What do you think? Yeah, he was also a fucking like a zillion other people. So those three, those remains, like they're all, none of them have a leg to stand on because they've all been standing up for each other for years and years. It's like a pirate ship at this point.

Yeah, you really, so. And it is like the honor among thieves kind of thing because you see what happens when they're really backed into the corner and start turning against each other. Like Tom suddenly starts turning against Jack's for being a cheater. When Tom knows that he was also a cheater the whole time. And then you've got Schwartz in this,

like refusing to go along with Sandivall anymore and giving up his timeline because now he's really in trouble. You know, it's like, no honor among thieves, darling. That's where the saying comes from. Sweetie! Sweetie! All right, where are we? God, this is long. It's so long. It's ridiculous. Well, It's so long. I'm very nervous because the cleaning lady is here today. I know I'm so sorry everyone. That is the cleaning lady vacuuming that is not the sound of Tom Tandoval railing someone upstairs. But I'm very nervous that she's going to try to walk in here during this. That's not the sound of James in the bathroom right now.

Taking a significant break up all the back of me. Coming up. Coke. Alright guys, we took the vacuum lady as a sign. This will be a two-part recap. The next part will be up very shortly. Thanks for being with us. See you soon. Watch what crap ends. Would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King. Ashley Siboneone she don't take no baloney Dana C Dana, dude she's not just a Sheila. She's a Daniella itchles Aaron McNeilis she don't miss no trickleus Jamie she has no less Mamie

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You can listen ad free on the Amazon Music or Wonder e app. Celebrity beef, you never know if you're just going to end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife and I'm Sydney Battle and we're the hosts of Wonder E's new podcast Disantel. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud from the buildup, why it happened, and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feuds say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows.

It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood, how much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wonder Ya.