Watch What Crappens - PumpRules: Axes of Evil

Episode Date: April 9, 2020

We will be recapping all seven parts of Netflix' Tiger King on our Patreon feed, and will have video recaps available for six of those episodes on Crappens On Demand! The Witches of Weho put another axe in Kristen's back this week on Vanderpump Rules, but we all beg for one to the face when we find out we have to sit through Schwartz and Katie getting married AGAIN. Get the Dollar Tree tea towels ready! For the entire season of Netflix' Tiger King recaps with Crappens On Demand videos for epis 2-7, become a member over at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. **New merch! Isolate and BenRon 2020 Vote Hypocrat designs available at crappensmerch.com **Crappens Live has been postponed until our country is healthy again. Keep up with our live show calendar at at watchwhatcrappens.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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You're gonna cry. You're gonna cry. You're gonna cry. You're gonna cry. You're gonna cry. a bachelor podcast you're about to start recapping. Listen to your heart next week and here I am with the gorgeous Ben Mantelker of the Game Brain podcast and Real Housewives of Kitchen Island. So, cartoon on YouTube. You can watch and subscribe to and stuff. Hi, Ben. Hey, what's going on? Not much, how are you? I've got great news for you. Whoa, really? What's that? We get to watch Tom and Katie get married again soon. Oh

My god, it's you know what during these tough times. I'm so glad that something is going right Yeah, yeah, the emotional abuse Everybody welcome to the show today. It is Vanderpomp rules day real quick. We're doing the entire season we are doing. We are doing the entire season of Tiger King. Most of those are on video as well as just audio. And you can find the video recaps and the audio recaps over on crap and on demand and Patreon and all that stuff. So go sign up for that. Also, we're going to do a live show. We were supposed to have live shows next week, but obviously America still the world is still stuck in. So, so are we. So we're going to do live shows next week but obviously America still the world is still stuck in so so were we so we're gonna do a show next

week you guys had asked for sometimes that we're easier for East Coast people to make it so we're gonna do it on an actual show night of Friday night well so sweet this Friday and it's gonna be at 6 p.m. Pacific and 9 p.m. Eastern time and we are going to be recapping Real Housewives of New York City. You can find that on our crap and it's on demand. We'll do a pre-show first on Instagram. No, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. What did I say? New York. New York City. Yeah, Beverly Hills. The premiere of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Thank you. And yeah, we'll do a little pre-show thing on Instagram at 6 and then we'll go on Patreon at 630.

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Yeah. Good of pounce. That's that. Are you ready to move on with this recap, Ben? Now Bernie's out of the way now can be Ben Ron only been finally finally our moment Yeah, good pounce and that's that are you ready to move on with this recap ban? Well in the words of Trixie Monaco who debuted her new song at the top of this band of pop rules episode Here's what I have to say about that 5 4 3 2 1 5 4 3 2 1 It's a countdown. She even put that in there. 5 4 3 2 1. It's a countdown. No, she's, Trixie is just doing numbers now. Not even any lyrics. She's just counting. Well, actually, she's actually done counting. She used to say three, two, one, hey, but now she's added five and four to the mix. Yeah, it's a big long countdown.

This is sort of like her Bohemian rhapsody. It's not just three numbers. It's five. She's going to pull a Bob Dylan and just release like a 30 minute single of like 30 minutes, 29 minutes, 39 seconds. She probably will and there will be some hipsters and silver like it will actually buy and be like, dude, you gotta listen to this shit. It's crazy. It's just a woman singing the minutes. Farne Lee Bob Dylan tweeted at me. It's like congratulations, Trixie. Um, so the show opens up over in Venice at the world famous Venice skate park, which

is truly famous. It's like the birthplace of competitive skating, I think, something like that. I don't know. But it's like a whole big thing. And it's basically Max and Tom, Tom Sandevol and Jacks. And I think Tom, Tom and Tom Schwartz, I don't know Tom Sandevol and Jacks. And I think Tom and Tom Schwartz, I don't know if Sandevol was there, I don't remember. No, not Sandevol.

Yeah, but basically the bro and everything. And Max decided he wanted to learn how to skateboard and Tom Schwartz, he used to be a big skateboarder when he was a kid, so he's gonna try to do it. And within a second max wipes out and shorts, bashes in his knee and has to limp off, of course. Yeah, this is one of those episodes you're just reading for people to fall and get hurt.

And that was fun, you know? Shorts like back in 96, I was kick, I was kick flip and stairs every day. Okay, glad you could find another useless fucking hobby shorts. Yeah, is anybody else surprised to see shorts out there like trying to learn how to skateboard like get a job, get a job. Exactly. Like fracturing his kneecap in the process, you know,

and of course, it's like, I'm a pro. I'm a pro. And Max is screaming out mighty ducks. You know and Jackson's like I'm a pro I'm a pro And Max is screaming out mighty ducks mighty ducks a lot cuz you know Amelia West of Es and stuff and Jack actually has a point though by the way cuz he's like listen This skate park is for people who are like professional skateboarders or like former professional skateboardipboarders like it's honestly not where you go to learn how to skateboard. That's true.

I mean, there's like no reason for those guys to be there. Well, hey, I'm just thankful they're not getting their vagina's wax. They're going to an axe throwing, you know, thing. So I have to hand it to them for not doing either of those things today. I'm like, some people I know. Hmm. true. You said that in a way that made it sound like I just went axe throwing and got my vagina wax.

I did not do the bit of it. Okay. Just want the audience to know I've done. I've never done easier with those things in my life. You've never gotten your vagina wax? You don't know what you're missing. Never. It stinks so good, Ben.

I'm sure. So, basically, they have to talk about this Katie situation, right? You know it's bad when Jack's has to bring it up. Jack's the most abusive person on Bravo. Other than Reza, I would say, he has to be like, so did you talk to Katie? And Shorts is like, yeah, that was kind of intense. And both like, yeah. I mean, you know, if you guys want to fight like that at home, I guess,

that's okay, but you're in public. Yeah, bra. And and and shorts is saying how like, you know, the reason why he snapped at Bo last episode was that like, Bo caught him off guard. And he's like, and it's okay. I like being challenged. I really do.

I really do mainly because I really don't have any opinions until until I get drunk enough and I can access that reservoir of repressed emotions and let them out. But honestly, I like being challenged. It's okay. It's okay. I was just, you know, I was just tired and drunk and the way she reacted to me, the way she did, I was utterly disgusted and shouldn't have acted the way I did by reacting to her totally disgusting, ridiculous response to a hilarious joke. I shouldn't have acted that way, I'm sorry, Baba. Yeah, he totally whips out his baby voice

for this whole episode, which is his psychology voice. It's like his abusive and then, oh, Baba, oh. And he even goes into different ranges as we go throughout the episode. To the point where he's getting like, she numb up at voice going on, where he's like, Baba, Baba, Baba. And you notice that he doesn't take any responsibility episode to the point where he's getting like she numb up it voice going on where he's like bb

bb bb and you notice he doesn't take any responsibility when he says that he goes I was just tired and drunk and the way she reacted the way she did I was just disgusted and shouldn't have acted that way so he's just he's saying yes I shouldn't have acted that way but he's still saying yeah but she reacted in a way that I didn't approve of and I was disgusted I'm like well that's the issue is that and I was disgusted. I'm like, well That's the issue is that you're being so obnoxious, right? Like it's not that you were tired and drunk like you were tired

Well for you the ish for Tom short the issue is that he was tired and drunk and for the like, you know He finally said what he really felt for once, you know But he was still obnoxious. Yeah, I'm jackson I don't know if I you're making sense I just can't like Katie's such an asshole. Like you can't say anything bad about Kate. I can't say anything bad about Katie because she was totally right and Tom's a prick, but I also I'm not going to the mat for Katie. So I'm just like, I'm not going to have your moment. I'm not going

to the mat for Katie. No, I know. I'm not saying you are. I'm just saying I'm not going to get dragged into being nice to Katie. No, no, it's more about being mean to Tom Schwartz. Yeah, well, he's more about, yeah, it's more about like, I'm the second tired of his like cute little boy act. And like, no, just because you said that and a cute little boy tone doesn't mean I didn't hear what you were saying with your words

and you took no responsibility there. And don't think that like your little boy, aw, shucks thing is gonna work right now. Yeah, well, congrats. You've got another hour of it. Because it's this entire episode. So, Jackson's like, these girls, you know, they're just inedible.

These girls are inedible. Like it would have been fine if there was no girls there. Yeah, this is how it happens, by the way. This is how terrible things happen in our society. When guys are challenged, and then they don't know how to deal with it, and then they realize the real problem is the women in the first place. This is where it all goes wrong, okay? We're seeing those leads of it happening right here at the Venice Gate Park.

No, what's really wrong with this world is that when you have a problem with somebody, you try to eat them, okay? You can't just go around eating people. We've gotta stop this in this country. That's bad. That's just shows you how bad Jack says that he would actually try to eat someone and I'm still mad at something else.

I know. So you still need drugs like a sandwich for you to be more comfortable. So, Danica, Arianna and James and Brett and Veckele, Dana, oh my God, just writing dad names at this point. They're all at an axe rowing place Yeah, they're there. There's a guy named Bryce who's like the hatchet master which like if you saw him If I ever saw that guy walking down the street I'd be like don't know who you are

But I can just sense that you work with hatchets. I just get that vibe He does he looks like he just came down from like a smoky hill and Yeah, yeah, it like works for his paw and he's got like a math habit, but he also still has to go to work every day. So it's like he keeps it under control, you know. Yeah. And but he's since he's in Los Angeles, he also obvi enough does voiceovers for commercials and you're like, how that guy get voice that happened. Like I smoke a lot of cigarettes in the Appalachian mountains. Yeah, he just like fell into voice over work. He's one of those people.

It's like, oh God, the hillbilly came down and just fell into fucking voice overs. Yeah, but then he always talks about it. You're like, oh, so how long have you been working at this hatchet throwing place? Like, well, only for a little bit. But now that my voice over career is taking off, I'm hoping to wrap things up in the next year or so. I'm like, what do you my voice over career is taking off, I'm hoping to wrap things up in the next year or so. I'm like, what do you have voice over career? He's like, guys, there's people behind you can we expedia this along?

Don't like, wait a minute, you are the expedia guy, aren't you? Well, you got me, here's not a graph. Sound your axe, I'll throw it. He's like, don't do nothing stupid. He's like, yep, you're an axe guy. Definitely don't like nothing stupid. I was like, yep, you're an X guy. Definitely talk like an X guy. So, Arianna's like, Danica, would you say you have an axe to grind?

I take comedy very seriously, okay? So your pun better be good. The guy's like, I love an X-Pen. Let's share a can of corn later. So, so, Raquel actually manages just hit the target first unbelievably and she's like I had no idea then I would axi the everyone's expectations. I'm a. Expectations are expectations. How are you? Expectations. I'm a bad axe bitch. Oh, it's the thing is, Rick Kow can't really pull that off because she would say,

axiot expectations. She would, you know. I was like, oh, that was on purpose. Well, that was cute, but also for me. Yeah. And then also, more tragically, Brett is like talking to Dana and he's like, yeah, you know what, we're in an ax-dorn spot and I'm wearing ax.

Dana goes, you sure. I don't know. Yeah. She's like so. Never admit that on camera, by the way, that you're wearing ax. Okay, everyone, don't ever admit that on national TV. Well, just to go toe to toe,

I'm wearing an old-spice deodorant today. You're welcome. Well, that's all right at least. Like for some reason I find it more pleasant if you were to say, hey Ben, I was just clearing out my old spices from the cabinet and guess what? I'm wearing old spice. I'm like, okay, but Axe, like Axe body spray,

that is some like Jersey Shore Shit. Yeah, well later, later, nevermind. Okay, so Brett's like, yeah, acts. So Dana's like, are you coming in my birthday? Amazing, uh, amazing. Uh, Kristen and Katie might come, so, just let you know, it's like, who cares? Why are we having another birthday?

How about we go a fucking minute without somebody having a celebration about something, okay? Seriously, Dana's like, How about that? Go for a bike ride. So Dana's like, yeah, how about that? Go for a bike ride. So, Dan is like, yeah, bring that big dick energy, bring that BDE. He's like, yeah, yeah, totally, totally. He's like, hey, by the way, you know what?

I don't know if it's the haze of acts by his spray around my nostrils right now, but I was thinking that we should hang out outside of work. I feel like I don't see you outside of like parties or something like that. So, I don't know. I feel like reaching up the see you outside of parties or something like that. So I don't know. I feel like reaching up the hair and getting some lunch sometime. He's like, listen, you're publicly humiliated

every second of the show by Max, who's a slime ball. And there's no way I'm fucking shina again to get work. So let's try and make something happen here. Okay, please. I got really love to take you out somewhere where I could look soulfully into your eyes and think about what I'm going to say about myself next. We do that.

And Dan is like, oh my God, he's totally easy to talk to. Like it's not forced at all. Like yes it is. Okay, yes it is forced and it's painful fast-forward through the, although I did love the bread. Someone got this gif and put it on our Facebook, which is so funny. Brett's like sipping a drink and kind of half winking at her and then rolling his shoulder at the same time. It's like a slow shitting drink. I didn't do the gif, I thought what would happen. I thought what would happen. I was like, please stop.

It is like, you know what, I'm just like afraid that she is going to get weird in breakfast. She's not allowed to get weird about that. She's not allowed. Like, okay, sir. You know what, she is going to get weird in breakfast. She's not allowed to get weird about that. She's not allowed. Like, okay, sir. You know what? She is allowed to get weird about it because you went over to her house to have her world famous angeladas. You played scatigores, then you guys boned and all spare after love and boning.

That's what happened. Okay, she's allowed to get into her feelings. Let's, she, she, she, have her feelings. And then Dana picks up on that. And so she's like, well, Max doesn't get to feel bad for the rest of the. Yeah, Max doesn't get a vote. Max doesn't get a vote. That's like her new thing. She's like, I mean, you think she's the governor of Georgia. Max doesn't get a vote.

So then Charlie did it was a topical human. No, okay. Remember that guy won Georgia because he was also controlling the election boards. Remember that? No. Any who was fun. It was great. It was a great moment. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I was trying to figure out what this means. Carla. I would just be a toddler. And yeah, I know, but I was trying to figure out my own word. I'm all over here. Okay. Because you tried to be mean because you mixed up Charlie with Carla from Cheers for a moment

And I think that's where things went wrong. You like how to re-approlman vision. She does she does give off kind of a Carla vibe Maybe in like 20 years when she's way better. She's the Carla origin story. She's like She's like the wicked for Carla. Yes, back when Carla smiled. Like throughout this, we're going to learn why Carla stopped smiling, you know. When Carla, like, became hardened because someone was mean to some, to a lion on the cage at school. I have a feeling it has nothing to do with nipple tape and all the cops. The cake, I'll tell you that the cake thing that happened in the end of the episode was forming.

This is why Carla became Carla, okay. Yeah, she's never gonna ever trust a Shelley long time. Dang it. Yeah. By the way, off topic, which I know everyone's really excited about. I watched Passion. Did you ever see Passion, the musical?

Yes, I sure did. I saw it on Broadway. I am so fascinated to know what you think about that. Well, that was a shit. That means I was such a hunk of shit. And when I saw it, they were changing it every day. They were doing rewrites of it, like literally every day. They would do a different version of it.

So God knows what version I saw, but it was one of the worst things I've ever sat through. Because it was pretty bad. And the entire time I was like, oh God, I hope Romney has seen this because I feel like he has some distinct opinions about this, especially Vaska and her, you know, well, it's on YouTube, everyone. We watched a copy of it on YouTube to go watch it at your own peril, but it's also hilarious. That could go on our list after cats of something to watch and make fun of.

Okay, so we're getting to see people pretend to wait tables today and Charlie's up first. She's like, um, honestly, I would just do the cobbler and the chocolate cake, honestly, like if you ask me and the customer is like, well, what about the cheesecake though? She goes, oh, well, I'm serious about my cheesecake, so I go to the cheesecake factory. Yeah, I'm just a picky person. It's really good, too, but I'm just like a picky person. So I go to the cheesecake factory for that.

You know, it's hard to get a reservation. Yeah, I like that. I also, by the way, fuck that lady, because she wanted the cheesecake all along. So I was even asking Charlie, you know? That was one of those things where it's like, can you tell me about these three other things that I'm thinking about getting,

but I know I want the cheesecake just so I know. Because that's what that question's all about, right? Well, when people ask you questions like that, they're not asking you for your actual opinion. You know what I mean? Like the lady who's able to spend $30 on an entree is not really caring what Charlie thinks. She's asking for her approval. That's it. Yeah. No one cares what Charlie thinks

about cheesecake. Okay, Charlie. She just looks like a choice. When I do it, I'm looking for nonverbal things. Okay. I'm like, I'm like the mentalist of dessert questions, because I generally always will go for your own. Let me put on a very tight vest. All right, I'm ready to order this to say it. Yeah, because usually, like, when I ask the waiter, well, sometimes it's like, I'm just usually looking to see their reaction, right? Because if they say, oh, that's really good, I don't get that that often, but that's really good. I'm like, okay, it's not good. Because they always have to say it's good, almost always. But, yeah, that's why I'm like, okay, it's not good because they always have to say it's good almost always, but Yeah, that's why I'm like always trying to read between the lines and like CSI waiter opinion Well, let me tell you what they're really thinking I hate you

Okay, and that's if they're even focusing on your face most of them aren't even gonna see you or remember Wouldn't be able to pick you out of the line up later You could shoot somebody in the head right in front of them and they would not notice you later Okay, now I know this doesn't make me sound like the best waiter and guess what? A material waiter. Okay. So anyway, Charlie is like, yeah, cheesecake factory. So then Vanderpump sees, get more, get more, you're so handsome.

Yeah. And he gives her a hug because she just got back from her mom's funeral and basically all Lisa has to say about that is, well, it's very sad, but I'm British, so I'm gonna bring myself together anyway. Magic show, let's see, let's see, let's see. So they, they, they summon over Danica, cause the Guillermo's like, so Danica had the two tables,

we give managers, you know, two tables, and we, she had two tables, and she, she messed them up and one of charging $200 by mistake we had to call, and Lisa's like, that is horrible that's could happen max max at the child at the child yes you can you send Danica to us please thank you this is your one moment on screen for the season I know poor max is just standing by the table waiting for some kind of raise or acknowledgement that he's like privileged in some ways.

Like, please am I still a fleet runner? Okay. All right. I'll be right back. Max, don't take this the wrong way, but you're now max number two on the show. James's brother, Titi has taken over his number one. Yeah, Faith, how can I help you? So Danica's like, um, you bonnet, Matt. and she's like, yes, I heard you screwed up two tables

And then you had to call and say hello. It's me. I boomed up. I boomed up your tables, darling And Danica's like, yeah, you know what? I take this job very seriously I take it as seriously as Charlie takes cheesecake and Arianna takes a stanch comedy That's how it seriously I take this. And it was an honest mistake. And I just had a really stressed out day. And I know that's not no excuse. But it's not an excuse. That is not an excuse.

I know I shouldn't be bringing my problems into the restaurant. But if I may offer up an excuse, I did make an honest mistake and it was really stressed out. You have brought your problems before though. Having you. And then we see a clip of her telling down which we never saw on the show right And we saw this what we never saw on the show, but we saw this we keep see Well, I think we've seen this flashback at least definitely ones at least two or three times I love it at least the thing you put your hands on

red I have to suspend you and she's like, um, there's like ruins my life She's like and there was also an attitude problem you went to Tom Tom and you were rude to Richardson Richardson who has worked with me for so many years and never gives it room I can't wait to see that sitcom Richardson never gets it wrong. Son is LinkedIn. And Danica's like, I was confused. So listen, your attitude, listen to me, it's like, I do not have an attitude. I swear, I don't have an attitude. So Lisa's like, Danica's ambition is to be in the restaurant trade. She's in a management position. I don't have an attitude. So Lisa's like, Danica's ambition is to be in the restaurant trade. She's in a management position.

I don't know why she said that, but she just said that. It's like all of a sudden like, hey, just in case I forgot who Danica is in the middle of the scene, this is her backstory. And the car's with Danica going, I do not have a fucking attitude problem. Bullshit. I don't even get ruff around the edges.

I've checked all her wings and they seem to be working and have a problem with that. They need to be broken in some way. Yeah. So, please now go stand inside of that Rolls Royce you see out there. That's right, Ken. Back it up, back it up. And Broken Bird. Alright, so we'll drag Broken Danica back in here, darling.

She's reired. Okay, I hear that you have to breathe into a breathalyze at a such a car. Perhaps you were drinking because you felt alone in this world. Your parents have abandoned you on some form. You feel like people don't connect with you. You have a void that needs to be filled, anything like that, please. No, please. Now I just pardon it too hard one night damn it she's a perfectly fine bird so over at Bubba and Bubba's house um shorts is like Bubba he's like limping around he's

like Bubba I got over his horse at this keeper oh look I'm falling for me. Bobo, oh, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, Bobo, my very own life in front of all my friends. Nothing we haven't dealt with. Nothing we haven't sailed. And then she goes, yeah, but Baba, we haven't sailed that for a long time and it really rocked me. It rocked me to my core. And he's like,

I just was overreacting to your overreacting. You know, you were so overreactionist and then I overreacted because you were disgusting. Which I don't mean sexually I just mean it like gross for giant night you're for giant is disgusting. That's not I really made your thoughts at point I've reacted to it being your fault. Yeah, he's like I still don't don't thought about a by your reaction. So he's not a apologetic at all, you know, and she and she's basically like it just seemed kind of insensitive

in these times, reliving it, and he goes, don't be a social justice warrior. I'm like, you know what, fuck you dude. Like, that is like, I hate when people just like, say that as a blanket reproach. Like, I don't have to hear what you have to say. I'm just gonna call you a social justice warrior. Please.

He's like, what do you want a trophy to, snowflake? Listen, Katie, I was just trying to red pill you, okay? Listen, it was a harmless prank. And after the dust that settled, you were still sulking and scowling. Well, you know what, like, sometimes that happens with pranks if they don't go off-rider, you don't know your audience, et cetera.

And it's like, don't take it personally that she didn't think the joke was funny. If anything, you should have been like, I don't know, I think I would have like maybe like hugged her or something like that. But like, sorry, it was just a joke. It didn't mean to make you feel sad, right? Then why are you getting mad at her?

Because she didn't laugh at your joke. That's for us to do. Also, she's like, I was soaking because you were telling me off in front of our friends. So, and he's like, no, no, no, no, no, bubble. This scared me, bubble. I thought it was self-intelating immature because he put so much time in,

it's like he's over topping this baby voice shit. So he's like, bubble bubble. Bubble bubble. Bubble bubble. Bubble bubble. Bubble bubble. Bubble bubble. Bubble bubble.

Bubble bubble. Bubble bubble. You know, like sucking up. What's wrong with him? I feel like they put on like a new version of Joseph and the amazing Technicolor DreamCode, okay? Like a Randall spent a few thousand dollars voluntarily, okay, for the stupid prank.

This was not something that was like five years in the making, you know, with like, this is not the opening ceremony, the Olympics, okay? And like why, it doesn't matter how much money they put into it. Why, and why is that more important than your wife's feelings? Yeah. I mean, yeah. So she's like, well, I just wanted him to apologize for speaking to me that way.

Like, he's a pin, entitled to his wrong opinion. And, but she's just like, you didn't help the mood, okay? A lot of people weren't happy with you. Sure It's a lot of people which is such a Katie thing like it wasn't just me everyone's mad at you And he's like, but I know I'm super disappointed in myself like I was super turned off by you Like not in this sexual way more than like a limp dick never gonna get hard for you again kind of away You know, but I don't like being mean spirited I love you mama. I love you mama. Yeah mean-spirited. Oh, I love you, Pema. I love you, Bama.

Yeah. I really love you. I really, really love you. I really love you. I really love you. He's like, I just, I don't know why I got so mad. I don't know. I don't know why I did that.

It's like, because you got drunk and you don't express your true feelings and you hide behind a veneer of being in this awesucks, it is that little boy when you're evil. Yeah. So she's like, well, okay, anyway, now that you've groveled for a while, let's just get over and remind everybody that we're a great couple. Remember that engagement, that elaborate engagement that you gave me? Boney's some advice. So I'm going to go totally give him advice. My first piece of advice is threaten him with a timeline. And maybe tie a ring to a string. Yeah. Give her that.

It's time for commercial. It's time for a crappy celebrity beef. You never know if you're just going to end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife. And I'm Sydney Battle. And we're the host of Wonder Woman's new podcast, Disantel. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud from the buildup, why it happened, and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feud say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle

between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums?

Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. Those are my plans. So then we go over to Villa Blanca and Stassian Katie march in like their royalty and Which I guess they sort of are in that restaurant which is sad and then Then Kristen joins to they first are like Stassian Katie like They're talking about who knows what and then Kristen sits down and they just like clam up and it's cold and there's awkwardness And the reason why the three of them are there is because they have to plan a witches of we hope party

Which is this wine that they are now reluct because they have to plan a Witches of WeHo party, which is this wine that they are now reluctantly all bound to. And I don't know why they would go to Villa Blanca to plan it except for the fact that that's where the Prouchers said they had to be so that Lisa could drop by and ruin everyone's plans with Kristen. Also, I think this is their plan because Katie, you know, Katie Lazy's. She's like, look, I mean, the location can be whatever. We'll just have a lot of pink roses. I'm just like oh so basically here Yeah, it's just like looking around she's like you know what I'd like Everything to be white with some pink roses and overpriced giant tubular pasta. Okay

Let's have some sticky toffee pudding there and some tuna tartar. That'd be great. Now is anybody going to try and guess why I'm wearing a short, short jumper that's brown with white coconuts? Anybody want to try and guess? Okay. I'll just let it pass. Yeah. So Stasi talking about how she realizes that in business, she wants to be dictator and not in democracy, which is probably a good thing to, a realization to come to at this early point in her life. And so they're just sitting there and then almost on her here. Ah, troubles here.

And it's Lisa Vanderpump standing with her friend Alaina, who also happens to be the wife of none other than... My strode Nikolaine. I would like you to meet Alaina Alain, None other than... My strong nickelane! I would like you to meet a lana-alane, also known as... the lady who holds my dog for me. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha thought that you'd be here. Anyway, have a great time at Vegas doing something very, very important that I'm sure you're all invited to you. Goodbye. And then the music's like, uh, Chris is like, oh, Vegas, I have no idea what she's talking about. And then we find out, Stass is like, yeah, at least it didn't necessarily spill the tea about them getting married again at Vegas, but regardless, Oxity for realsies.

Sorry, I got a mouthful of ice coffee on that one. Delicious. Delicious, I needed to. That was a roughly Savannah problem impersonation for me. I drive my throat out real quick. Kristen's face, I mean my god, she's like having regular jerks, like shoulder jerks, face jerks,

and then she's having internal face jerks. We're like, when she gets jerking over to the other side of her, like one of her eyes just pops out, just to spring holding my eye in and it's like, dang, it goes there. It's like poor Kristen. You know what she looks like? You know that little, that old thing of like, let's go out to the movies, let's go out to the movie. There's like a popcorn and a soda and a hot dog like walking together saying, let's go

out to the movies. You know that, You know that little cartoon thing? Yeah. She looks like she's the hot dog at the front of the line and then like the hot dog turns around to be like, let's do it one more time guys and she realizes the popcorn and the soda and everything else is nowhere to be found. And she's just a hot dog walking alone singing a song to herself and her and her fellow concession refreshments have abandoned her. It's a poor Christian. She's the, she's the hot dog walking alone in the, because she does have that, you know, because the hot dog has that confidence, right?

The hot dog is like, yeah, I'm tall. I got a bun. I've got like an accessory. I'm walking. I'm running this parade right now. Yeah, let's go out to the movies. Seriously, let's go out to the movies and have some, some fun. Seriously, seriously, and then all of a sudden,

it's just a hot dog. The other snacks are like, ew, pig parts and sodium nitrates are so out right now. Let's leave it. Ew, we are staying home and watching something on Netflix. So, Kacita's something, some restaurant.

They made it. Kacita's alcampo, we're. Oh, we're duh. Remember? Yeah. Remember, we were trying to have a live show there way back Del Campo. Oh, duh. Remember? Yeah. Remember? We were trying to have a live show there, way back in the day. Oh, yeah. Why would they go all the way over there?

I guess they live over there. But yeah, casita de campo. They got lost. Didn't they got lost on the way to mixology 101? So Dana meets up with Brett. And she's like, can we order a cocktail? Because those are vegan. Thanks for bringing me to this fucking place.

At least there's one thing you can eat. You strange praying mantis, man. So, yeah, so they're hanging out. And Brett's like, yo, I'm a bruise before hose guy. So I told Max that we're hanging out. And I already know, just from knowing you for like like two months that you have a great head on your shoulders And that's not easy to find out here. I'm like, okay, this is so page not stop saying that because you don't really know that and Second of all stop talking about how like it's not easy to find out here

Not LA when you've been here for three months and you've hanged out you've done nothing but hung out in the Dushiest corners of the city. And I love that he's like, you have a great head on your shoulders. Yeah, and she's also really hot. I'm like, yeah. I'm like, yeah. You just walk up to any girl.

Wow, you look like you're in tell. Are sense of doku you're doing on the train. Would you like to get buried? You seem to have a good eye for numbers, all right? It's just like very coral for him to do that. Like, yeah, I can really tell you. Yeah, so you got a great head on your shoulders. Yeah, great.

By the way, you look great. But you look great by the way. So Dana's like, uh-huh. Well, I feel like you look in depth, you look for depth in people, which is cool, but you also love the like YouTube insta model, like with long black hair and a coke bottle body. But you know what, it's just like, I just want somebody's capable of understanding me. Oh, okay.

Yeah, you know what, it's gonna be really hard to find somebody who can swim the depths of your workout videos on YouTube. Yes, like what is there to understand? Is it like met our ex nutrition? really hard to find somebody who can swim the depths of your workout videos on YouTube. Yes. What is there to understand? Is it like met our ex nutrition? Got it. Okay.

What's next? Herbal life. Got it. Herbal life. So, yeah. But Brett says he's trying to, you know, because she basically calls him out on the fact that he just loves skanky Instagram models. And he's like, no, it's not that they're my type,

but I do like something to handle. Okay, I do like something to handle. I hate when guys say that, as if like, like you can't handle like, like Instagram models are the only type of people that you can quote unquote handle. Is that what, I think he's saying like a butt, right? Like quote them quote handle. Is that what is he? I think he's saying like a butt, right?

Like a big old butt. Is that what you're saying? Yeah, because she's saying curvy and he's like, yeah, that's something I can handle. Yeah, you get like if you got a hit, you can. I don't actually, I don't even know why I'm getting on to, I'm taking myself off this soapbox. This is such a stupid soapbox to stand on to. I'm like, I just started stepping on to it.

I'm like, I actually don't mind if guys like curvy ladies, I just started stepping on it. I hate it with guys like curvy ladies. I'm like, I actually don't mind if guys like curvy ladies. I just think I get mad. I'm just like mad at real curvy. It's just like when you say like, I need a little something to hold, like to handle. You're still talking about a twig. You're just talking about a twig with the butt pads now.

So please do you pray. That doesn't give you any added depth. Okay. So then he says something, he starts talking about his his ex girlfriend again because that's like all he talks about And he's like, you know, if she was driving I was shotgun like I had to take a back seat but like literally the back seat because literally a children can't sit in the front seat What is he saying?

He I couldn't I honestly couldn't tell if he was being figurative or literal because he said like how he, he was, you know, he needed someone who could understand him and in his last relationship but just didn't work out because she put him second. Like he was in the back seat of the relationship and not in the back seat like,

oh cool, he's being show for an uber to round. He was in the back seat like, because that's where kids go because kids can't go in the front seat So I think he was trying to make a joke But I kind of also envisioned him sitting in like a little like kitty chair in the back seat with a juice box Yeah, cuz he keeps saying literally and then he is like if she was driving I was shotgun. So that means he was in the front seat, right? I'm just not sure he knows how to use words

So maybe we should just like not take it out face value. Yeah, well at least he's not a woman and an edible woman, like Jackson said. So then Dana starts talking about her mom because they have the same birthday and her mom passed away. And so her birthday is really hard for her. And she's crying and stuff. And he's like, sorry you had to go through all that.

Let me help you by showing you this makeup that can really help with that cat eyeliner. Okay. You ever made that with a seahorse before? So do you want me to sit behind you while my ex-girlfriend explains how to properly put on fake eyelashes? Cause I will.

Do you want me to ask you when we're gonna be there? Are we there yet? Do I have to say that over a few times. So back over at Villa Blanca, Lisa's at her table with Alena. And she basically summons Stasi over like the waiter goes to Stasi and it's like, you've been summoned to Lisa's table. So Stasi goes over there thinking that she's in trouble.

But really just Lisa wants to gossip. And she's like, so seriously, what's happening with Belle? When you're gonna get that ring, girlfriend. She's like, at first we were just like, whenever this stupid fucking horror show of a white trash wedding is over, we'll do it. But then the wedding ended and he should have been fucking proposing

to me that motherfucking day with fuck. Yeah, at least it's like, I would get a time and done it at that little fucker in two weeks. Just you wait, just you wait, Enrique Strass, like, I'll start saying just you wait. That makes sense. Oh, just you wait, Henry Higgins. Just you wait, Stassi Higgins would have made more sense than Enrique Stassi. Just you wait. I've been singing my fair lady.

Damn it's because you were watching that Broadway HD. Did you sign up for it yet? I signed up for the free trial thing, but then I never watched it because I was like, but I've already seen all these show. I like the ones I want to see, except I haven't seen kinky boots. So I need to sign up just to watch that. I haven't seen that. Have you?

Dom watched that. I only got to see a few scenes because I think we're podcasting. Oh But yeah, no, I didn't I was watching homeland and oh, Sarc Oh, I heard O's arc season three is amazing. Have an even sorry the first O's arc the musical is really good Yeah, I was okay, but I figured out stupid Lord, you know, I don't like Laura Lenny, she makes me crazy. And I figured out why. And it's because she acts by repeating words

and that's how she comes across like she's being real and it makes me crazy. She'll be like, so what you're saying is that we should take, take the car car down to the, what I'm saying. That's her way of sounding natural and it makes me fucking crazy but I still sat through that hold-down season that sounds like that old well I'm not gonna go down by the way big news some groceries were just delivered I have to I have to text Dominique

to go get them from the door hold on once everyone would be a breath I know we're really focused in this recap anyway. We're like, Hey, so what'd you watch on Broadway HD? You know what I like? Tone nails. I've always really liked them. I just had to take them to get the, you know, they don't, sometimes they don't ring the doorbell. So just have to like, let them know that there's groceries on the other side of the door. Okay. Sorry. There's like, you know, this is this is what this is, you know,

groceries have arrived. Anyway, back to back to this show. So, you know, they're just like talking and then Lisa's like, you know, she's saying like, Oh, I heard that you and I heard this in digital dissension with Miss Dooh, D.H.A. and sausage like, um, yeah. So Kristen doesn't know about Katie and Tom getting married again in Vegas, eh, at least she's-

OOOOOOOH! OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH Yeah, she's not invited. Did I put my 14-EAT-O-N-O-L-E-N-I catch me while I fainted in the end? I catch me, catch me a-L-E-N-I! She's like, if you don't tell her what's happening in Vegas, she would be seriously peered! And Stasica's, um, who cares? Yeah, I've never seen just this. Who cares? She like comes from Minnesota all of a sudden So then Rip of Karrade rip of courageous rip of gorgeous rip off of gorgeous. Oh Baby

That's the next song, but it's like a ripoff. It's like, we're going for tacos. It's like, OK, Trixi, don't just do a gorgeous. What's up, brittacos? You actually started singing a Tina Turner song. I don't know if you realize that, but you actually started singing one of Tina's songs off of the private dancer album.

You can be exact. She's going to sing the song. as you got to show some respect. Not the tune that you just did. Oh, so Gorgeous ripped off Tina. There you go. What's Gorgeous? It's Gorgeous like a... And she's gorgeous!

But who sings the Gorgeous song? that is like very close to you got to show some Respect you got a Latina what's on it. What's gorgeous? Maybe you're gorgeous Seven by what's the space runa Mars sounds very Bruno Marsy baby bird your gorgeous wait what's his face? Runomars. It sounds very runomarsy. Baby birds are gorgeous. Wait, baby birds are gorgeous.

I don't know you guys. Geez, don't put me on the spot. It's just a song right here. Maybe those aren't even lyrics to it. I'm not very good. This is gonna be a 20 hour recap. Baby, runomars is gonna be solved by the time we're done with this.

Well, good. You said that like it's a bad thing. We're all gonna have going back to school issues. Well, good. You said that like it's a bad thing. We're all gonna have going back to school issues. God forbid the occupier ourselves with this stupid recap until a coronavirus is fixed. Happy Passover, by the way, to everyone tonight. Sorry, I was just thinking to the sound called baby. I know you're looking it up. I know you're looking it up. Okay, let's just forget it. Someone's going to know what I mean and tell us in the comments. Okay. At the very least, everyone can listen to respect, like, or like, you've got to show some respect by Tina Turner, not to be confused with respect by Rita, of course, which we all know how that

goes. So, Bo is getting advice. He's at the casting office right now. And you know, because he's talking casting with the lady. And he's like, what about her? She looks amazing. She's got a great rest now.

Okay, thanks for coming in here casting lady. I'm going to have a private meeting now. I know. That was actually, I think, his boss maybe. I think I thought I saw it said her boss, but she basically was like, I'm getting out of here. No, no, no, no. So Tom Schwartz and Katie come in and Tom is like,

Oh, cool. We're in a casting office. Hey, my name is Tom Schwartz and I'm auditioning for the role of asshole boyfriend and asshole friend. And Katie is like, yeah, you could throw asshole Huzz band in there too. He's like, oh, yeah, I forgot. I love the. I love the Katie just like but to slide that he's also me do his girlfriend So both like did you notice that bow is talking like sand of all during the scene? I mean, I he's talking much worse during the scene. He's like I was afraid of you if you parked outside my house You guys would see us fighting because we've been fighting too. So like oh my gosh So why are you talking like Schwartz stop it. So he's planning his engagement to Stasi and he wants help from Katie and Schwartz and he says this because he thinks that the only ones that can keep the secret I mean Katie I believe

the Schwartz I feel like Schwartz is it's like pretty much known that he's gonna tell everyone, right? And he'll be like, oh, sorry. I thought I could just tell this one person, but then they told everyone, sorry. So one then Katie runs right to Stasi right after this scene. And it's like, oh my god, both said you guys got in a fight. Yeah, that's true, too. So I don't basically get rings from his aunt and his dad which is not fair and

that doesn't count you better figure out a way to go buy some fucking rings. I don't know who you think you're marrying but Stasi doesn't need some hand me downs. Well she probably loves hand me downs because they come from dead people. You better tie like 20 K to one of them. Well, they're from Tiffany, I think either way, they are used. They are used. You better try some fucking many to that and weren't they right now? Well, either way, Bo has a great idea. He's like, you know, Stasi loves Graveyard and, um, you know,

she was saying that she really wants to go look for mausoleums after I forget what it was that happened, but something happened. Oh, after her grandma died. She wants to go look for mausoleums. So he's got this whole plan that they're going to go look for mausoleums. He's going to plant the ring box there and he's like, oh, what's that?

Or he's going to make her look distract her, then he'll get down on the knee. He's going to have a whole like full on, you know, nightmare before Christmas basically engagement. Yeah I'm gonna hide it inside of a dead person and then she's gonna have to put her hand down the dead person's throat and like go blah blah for you string all for you string and then it gives us this this load he's like I want to marry Stasi because she's the most important person in my life we laugh she's charming I don't want to live a day without her I want to think about her before I got her bad. I want to think about her when I wake up in the morning

Love death taxes and Stasi. It's like okay. He's a he's a official. He's a fucking murderer What is wrong with this person who talks like this? Well, you know, I did have to say I did think it was very sweet that he was like, we can just look at each other and eat mac and cheese. I was like, that's kind of goals right there. Not really. It's fucking good. Look at somebody and eat mac and cheese. What the hell? I do that with half the population. I'm not giving them a used ring over it. Oh, I like to use a ring point. I like how that's like really bothering you. It does bother me. This girl is waited forever. She dated Jacks. Okay. That's true. Stasi's got her issues, but she deserves more than a rent. And then you're not even going

to get her all the rings. He's like, which one should I give her out of these? Pick, pick your top two. It's like, oh, wow, she doesn't even get all the used rings. Maybe they can like melt them down into a brand new ring. I don't know. Maybe I listen. A beret. Maybe let me let me use the beret. Let me change your perspective of this.

Would you rather bow give Stasi some used rings? Or would you rather another scene with Kyle Chan or Bo tries to figure out a free ring to give Stasi Kyle Chan. I mean Kyle Chan. Wow. You got to see it. Stasi has had to sit through everybody else's free rings from Kyle Chan. You know, she should get a free ring too. She's earned her goddamn free ring from Kyle Chan. That's true. That is actually true. I mean, at least I'd be able to take that back later. You know, and hock it for something. No, I think that's Dossie likes not having a free ring

from Kyle Chan. It's like the equivalent of having a house in Valley Village at this point, right? Because everyone has the house in Valley Village, but she got a house in the hills. So now she's gonna have a non-chan ring, which I think is actually more important to her. Yeah, but she could take the Chan ring

and sell it, you know, pon it, know upon it pocket get whatever and get you know get a good you know uh... good security system for that new house i don't know pay for those new stairs are putting in the ticket the t that they have a whole tiki issue in their house i feel like yeah uh... you don't marry for money but you you know

you should marry with money. But there should be, maybe not solely for money, but yeah, I don't know, thinking effort over there. So basically Katie has no advice. Why would you ask Katie anything? So then we got a Kristen's house in Valleyville. Well, she's actually, Kristen's driving in her car. It's like, now we're seeing the movie Hot Dog.

It's now trying to find the rest of his little parade. And it's Kristen's driving, so she calls up Sheena and she's like, um, seriously? So I like Winterville Blanca with the bitches of WeHo. Do you hear that bitches of WeHo? It's a wordplay. And Lisa was there and she said something about going to Vegas and Katie and Stasi knew what she was talking about.

And like, I don't know. And I almost drove out the road because my shoulder hit my stealing grill. Sorry Oh I mean I introduced Tom and Katie and they're also like my best friends for decades so like So like, I don't know, like, is this like a cacal moment, a maraposa moment, or a seriously moment? I don't even know anymore. This is super hateful Katie.

It's just a bitch. And she's like, wow, I wasn't invited in, or I made what the hell? John, I think that just seems very vinyl. Oh, yeah. She's like, yeah. It is, by the way, it is totally obnoxious. Because even if you are feuding with Kristen

and you can't stand her, if you're still saying things like, I love you, it is Toby obnoxious, because even if you are feuding with Kristen and you can't stand her, if you're still saying things like, I love you, but I just need space, that's fine. But a wedding, even if it is a stupid, second time biggest wedding, like invite your fucking friend that you claim that you love. It's ridiculous. Yeah, they suck. But you know, it's Katie. So every year, it's like, who's Katie gonna try and oust from the group? Yeah. So, so sir Back in the game back in the game. So then guess what the special of the night is how many times is Sheila is she She now had to say this in her life. She's like well, how well the fish of the day today is a pan fried or pan cooked Chewli and sea bass

Like it has like it must be just like a fancy boss. Right? Yeah. Like it has like it must be just. Just put it on the menu. No kidding. Do they just get it? Do they know somebody in the sea bass business?

Like what the fuck? Just is it just like the Heather Locklear of the menu where end introducing Heather Locklear or guest star or the Heather Locklear when she's been on the cast for that long? Is it like the Marlow Hampton of Sir? Just put Roasted Chalancey Bass, Pan Roasted Chalancey been on the cast for that long. Is it like the Marlow Hampton of Sir just just put Roasted Chalancey bass pan roast of Chalancey bass on the menu and his points every night. And every night. So the British shows up. Yeah, she's wearing

the Sir uniform. She's like, Hi, Miss Mai. And she really is. She really is doing that laugh. And so Peter, she's basically coming back to work at Sir. And she's saying like, oh well, I say I never want to be in a situation where not contributing to the finances anymore. So I'm taking back up at work at Sir again, because I put in half for the house and half of the car and half for the checks mix that we got yesterday So I got started earning my money's and stuff So then Sina is talking to Dana at the bar and Dana's like hey, how are you? She's like I don't feel like I'm out of four times Jackson because I've been getting my body But I think for freezing eggs and it's like I'm a few days away from my retrieval and then they have me on new guys And it's stuck in me, it really hurts.

She's like, well, would you wanna go home? She's like, nah, it's okay. Yeah. So, the day is like, yeah, so I just wanna let you know, cause I'm trying to be really transparent, that, you know, I went out to lunch with Brett and I felt a connection. So, just letting you know, and she was like,

yeah, we're just friends, yeah, just friends. Like, totally not, like, concerned about this as well. Like, we're just friends, we're just friends. We're just friends, we're just like best friends, like best friends who like, maybe in the future, we'll fall in love, but like, for now, we're not falling in love, we're sort of like already in love,

but we're friends, we're friends. Yeah, we're just friends. I just pre-ordered time a new Magic Keyboard for his iPad. It was like $400 on Amazon. So, just friends. And she's like, yeah, we're just friends iPad. It was like $400 on Amazon. So just friends. And she's like, yeah, we're just friends. In fact, I named the penguin after him, just friends. Cause I got him a penguin.

And she's like, yeah, but you've also said that you might conceive children with him in the future or something along those lines. Like, oh, well, I say that to everyone. It's just a little shut up. You know, I just say that to everyone, shut up. Cause everyone's like, oh my god, when you guys gonna be together, I'm like, friends, a little shut up. You know, I just say that time. We're all shut up about it. Because everyone's like, oh my god, we need guys gonna be together.

I'm like, friends, we're such friends. I'm so excited. And it's like, so I just don't want to step on any toes. Like, so this develops into something you don't care. No, I don't care. I don't care at all. I don't care. And then Gina goes, basically, Dan,

I going out with Brat. To get, to get, is give, Dan is going out with Brat to give Max a big fuck you. And they just like shows what sort of person she is. I mean, not that I've ever done that, every single season, but, you know, runner. She's like, okay, you're sure,

because I don't want issues. Like, no, God. I was like, okay, so is this my edible mojito? What? I missed that part. I think I missed that. I thought you were gonna be all over that. You know what, I think I missed that. I thought you were going to be all over that. You know what?

I think I was still laughing at what Brittany was trying to remember the table numbers. And Peter was like, okay, so we're just going to go over the table numbers. What table is this? One, he goes wrong. He goes, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, Oh So then Lala and Dean I come over to Tom and Ariana's house for girl day by the Girl Sexy lady let's talk about this swimsuit. They all get into Ariana's swimsuit and swimsuits and they're all like they go out to the pool up back to hang girls time and Really honest there she goes well, this was nice until that one fly showed up

Swimsuit she is oh my god. I love a high-waisted line on a swimsuit. I mean guys hate them. Here's what guys think right? Wow Thank you, thank you, Dana. So, um, yeah. So then they, they start talking about tasting their own vaginas, you know, and Lala's like, yeah, I want to know what brand does tasting. I'm like, if you really want to know what brand does tasting, you better just go to Popeyes and see what they're sold out of. I know. No kidding. What do you think you your pussy's tasting? I would worry more about that. Your pussy is probably sick of having double helping some fried chicken. I'll tell you that. I know exactly. The Mala got every great chef's every great chef taste their food. So there's that.

So there's that. Chef, insert Chef Jojo, if you must. No, I'll just let that go. So, Dana's like, yeah, oh, so they're talking about how she went out with Brett. And Dana's like, yeah, well, he's a perfect specimen. But, you know, because of backside blinders on, but yesterday I was like, hmm, interested, interested. And so, Ariana's like, so did you invite him to your birthday party like are we still talking why are we sitting on the ground why do I insist on having fucking pool furniture that you're sitting on the ground it's like I never lose sir oh god la la are you still asking that fly if it's tasted its own vagina it's

not gonna answer you so um uh yes I was like so does does so they're asking if Max was invited. Aaron is like, so Max is Max is like with Tom right now and apparently he like doesn't know that he's invited and Dan is like, oh, what a frickin martyr So then we cut over to Max who is being a martyr and And he's like, yeah, so basically Dana didn't invite me to her party. I mean, she just saying she invited me to make me look up, but she didn't actually invite me. I'm like, isn't saying that she invited you the same as inviting you?

Isn't that possible? So for a moment, I actually have to say I was on Dana's side, but then it goes back to Dana. And she's like, my birthday isn't open invitation. Did I text Max and invite him personally? No, but he knows he's invited. I'm like, okay, actually, you know what, bitch, you did not invite him. Yeah. And why would you leave him out? Screw that guy. Learn from Katie. So then, Dohenny, Stassian Bose, lovely dinner. You know, I have to applaud Bo because he really has mastered the art of of a blanched dev roe hair.

His he has got full on like season two golden girls, room a clown hand blanched a roe hair going and it works for him. It's got like this nice like fluffy, it's like that mile that blanch would have, you know. Yeah. And Stasie's really mastered that look like that she's just been mile that Blanche would have, you know? Yeah. And Stasi's really mastered that look, um, like that she's just been toy that papered and every dress she wears. Like this one is like a strap that goes from one arm over the other one. And kind of ties her in to the dress.

And then there's like another cut out strap thing below it. She's like, um, I fully can't lift my arm. So. Oh. I'm just I'm trying to remember the visual of that dress. It's like cutouts, but also it's also like shoulder list, but also with the shoulder, but then also, I know it's crazy. Clearly both of us were less interested in the scene and more interested in focusing on some random detail.

Like I was focused on Brett's hair. I'm on Bo's hair and you were focused on Stasi's strap and we were like, let's look at these things instead of hearing what they're talking about because the truth is they weren't really talking about anything very interesting. Yeah, I'm really fucking sick of weddings. I'm sick of it.

Like what do I just have to see? You watch every single person on this show get married. I'm over it. Do a different show. Okay, and either different show Well, it's also I don't One thing that may be worse than weddings is watching scenes of people like same things like what I'm really I'm married What do I have married? I like that's not that interesting. But Stasi's mad basically at bow because Because bow after that big fight with the prank, Bo had texted Katie to say, hey, Stasi and I got into a fight also about getting engaged that night or some stupid fight. And he texted Katie that to make Tom and Katie feel better

about the fact that they weren't the only couple that got into a fight. So I was like, that's not your job. I barely even really know what your job is anyway, but I know that that's not it. Yeah, she's like, and I hate being vulnerable. So you think I like my friends asking about me being vulnerable. You think I like that? Yeah. And he's like, Papa, I'm not trying to hurt you. And this blah. And this is now his short voice is over the top and I can no longer pay attention to the scene. So you just finished it and tell me when it went. Okay. So basically what happened is that like Bo, Bo, Bo, Bo has been saying that he needs more

time, needs more time acting as if he's having like, he's like scared of marriage, but the truth is that he is really eager to, he just has this plan in place. And he's just trying to like, stave her off, but the more he tries to stave her off, the more crazy she gets. And he's like, I don't know what's more important, my mental health, or surprising her for an engagement. And he's like, mm, surprising her.

But then Mewaostos is getting mad. And she's like, because what all she wants to do is give an ultimatum. That's like, that would be her dream. Like, she probably just masturbates the idea of giving an ultimatum, because she is give an ultimatum. That's like, that would be her dream. She probably just masturbates the idea of giving an ultimatum because she probably gives an ultimatum to like literally everyone in her life and she's being really good about not giving him an ultimatum because she just doesn't want to be that person. So instead she's just like suffering and just like in this moment of not knowing when it's going to happen and so she's going nuts and she runs off to the bathroom and she's bad. Well, she's going through a very rough thing, you know, it's really hard

when you're like, but I'm richer and I'm famous. Why am I going to beg you? Exactly. It's a conundrum. So then, rock and roll. She's like, how can I work in a, how dare you into this conversation tonight? I don't know how to do it. I'm just gonna go to bathroom. It's my fucking maza-liam. Yeah, she hasn't been able to say it's my fucking birthday this season either. So she's going through a lot. Yeah. So let's go over to Rockin' Riley's. Rockin' Riley. It's the birthday party.

Woo! So everyone's showing up. Kristen does that. She does that thing that's so Kristen. You know people always do it but like when Kristen does it it's really funny because it really shows off her gangly nature. When you do like a series of arcises you know she's like walking up the bar and she has like both her hands on her mouth doing the like the rapid fire like but it's like because it's her it's just like watching It's just like watching to out of control antennas, you know, it's like just like seriously seriously because for everyone Seriously ganglion ganglion Danica gives Dana a cake with her When she's it's her picked it's her costume from Pride basically she's in her costume from Pride and

apparently cuz like oh we've had her ups and downs but I like the girl she gives me shit for having the breath lies before I get in a car and I gave her shit for picking shitty bad so it's fun perfect friendship like sounds perfect sounds really really perfect I don't we're never seeing Brett Lewis or what's his name? Brett Willis. Brett Willis. Brett what are you talking about, Willis? I suspect that if Brett Willis had agreed to allow his life to be on the show that maybe

Brett and Danico would be full-time cast members. Yeah. Because Danico's on the show a lot. And she's also the center of a lot of drama, but she's not like an actual cast member. Yeah. I think she will be next time. Maybe James is there and he's like, don't want to drink it all, Tarlin, don't need to drink it all.

Oh, last thing I'm thinking of is a drink, darling. And then Brian walks up to sand of all times wearing a hat and Brett's like, I almost wore the same fucking hat, bro. Almost did. In fact, I put it on same fucking hat, bro. Almost did. In fact, I put it on, but I actually have so much grease in my hair that I turned it transparent instantly. And Charlie is wearing this dress that looks like basic. It's like all the way open in the front.

And it basically looks like someone is reaching around from behind her and just covering her nipples with their pinky finger. And Arianna's like, how are you even wearing that? And she's like, well, I bought my boobs. I'm so sorry. Because I call them TN tomorrow. Sister.

Sister. True story. Oh, God. And then Lisa Vanderpump actually shows up with Nicolaine and Elena. And she's like, I don't normally show up at my staff's birthday parties, but I like Dara. What's her name again?

Doris, Delaila, Diesel? I love Vin Diesel. Her birthday party is a big, big, big. And then we meet the sister Brittany, Dana's sister Brittany. And she's like, I heard about your mother your birthday It's so significant that you're here. You're a good good girl loves her Elvis like Jesus Cuz I'm free Free bum teenies for everyone at the bar

So shorts and vizari on it is wedding. He's like, we're just getting it. Caesar's of course you are Of course, I'm free shit there. God. Yeah, you two are so predictable Exactly, of course, they're doing it at Caesar's Exactly. Of course, they're doing it at Caesars. They're probably going to have their entire reception at the Vanderpump. Yeah, they're talking about. They're talking about, for free shit. My God, do you guys do anything on your own? Anything. Although I will say the Vanderpump cocktail garden was really fun.

Because they served drinks the size of the fish bowls. It was insane. It was truly insane. So, then Kristen uh, so then Kristen and Katie sit down. I actually got, um, basically Mother Nature was like, listen, let me do you a solid. Let me just interrupt right now because it was raining really hard in LA. And so my satellites have to go a little bit on the fritz. So some of it was like choppy, but basically Kristen and Katie sit down to talk about this whole situation, and Kristen just starts crying at the gate, and Katie is like, ahhhh, convenient narrative, don't want to listen.

Yeah, and she's like, Come on, it was an army, I heard you guys, I heard you guys talking about the Vegas thing. Like, I had no idea what you were talking about. I had no idea I was on the no-fly list, dog. And she's like, well, I'm just inviting like my family. It's just a stoss you long on Seriously everyone but me no, it's not everyone but you I mean we're inviting max one and max two true We are inviting

Brett Willis even it's not even I don't really know who he is I just think that he might be related to Bruce We're inviting you know Kevin Lee and of course, you know Brett Willis, he was not even, I don't really know who he is, I just think that he might be related to Bruce. We're inviting, you know, Kevin Lee and of course, you know, Kyle Chan and we actually reached out to Vale from a few seasons ago, so she's coming. And also, the Instagram twerker from TomTom will be there. JoJo is going to be there. That girl who sometimes shows up in the town time scenes. She's gonna be there

But really just small it's small. Yeah God and Katie goes God we just need a break Chris. I'm so look you look me right in the hide you said we're not even sisters So he's like does somebody say sister sister no new person Katie's like but half we've been sisters and she I love you my sister It's like this isn't about me not loving you. Okay. I wish you could see that Literally love you more than anyone in my life like I would jump into traffic for you remember when I broke my Jocks I thought I'd have out of the Uber that's because I was doing it for you I thought someone was coming for your ranch and I said stop it and threw myself out of the Uber and tried to get myself right over But it didn't sort of where it sort of it did where it worked. I got one over. I got one over

Oh God Kristen. She's just not that into you stop It's not helping that you keep walking right after her and sobbing every single time and trying to start a big fight Okay, it's like exactly what she doesn't want. And second of all, get some self-fucking respect. You're begging to be friends with Katie. But also Katie gives mixed messages. Katie is saying like, I love you, but I need a break. Like, Kristen is like, it's right. Saying like, why do you say you love me, but then you give me a break. Like, but then you're not going to have me your wedding even if we're on a break. Like, it is bullshit too.

I think that Kristen's hurt, and I support Kristen. I'm team Kristen. I'm team Kristen on this too. I mean, she needs to be, she does, you're right. She needs to be, she needs to have more self-covidence in general with Katie and with Carter and with, I'm sure, the vending machine that she's gone to a few fights with.

Seriously, like, when could I have my candy bar seriously Just stand up to these people in your life, Kristen Yeah, I mean you're just begging to be friends with Katie. So then Brett and Dana All right, which of course it's basically she's also crying because she's basically being fired by Katie You know, it's like Katie's just deciding. oh, I don't want you on the show anymore, so that's it. Now when shooting with you at the end, we're gonna have these big monumental things

without you, bitch. And that's, I think, bigger than the friendship. It's like, oh, okay, so now you're gonna just try and ruin my entire fucking life and my career, fuck you, bitch. Yeah, seriously. So then we go over to Breton Dana. And Bret tells Dana that she now texted Max.

Like apparently there is, there is like an issue because even though she knows that she wasn't upset, she still texted Matt. And so then while they're talking Lala just like pops up. And so then she joins the conversation. And she's like, oh yeah, I heard that she is really upset. Like what's going on with that? So now it becomes the gossip session. Congratulations Brett, you're now a Lala.

Yeah, like they're both like, oh, hi, you're the shit stir of the new kids, I'm the shit stir of the old kids. Okay, who are we going to tattle tail on? Oh, the same person, great. Yeah. So Lala, yeah, so Lala's like, I'm going to get white girl wasted on Diet Coke. Yeah.

So anyway, you know, pick up a shot, which I'm assuming is orange juice. I'm sure, but yeah, people on the internet are like, did she have a shot? I don't think Lala would do that. I actually believe in Lala. I believe Lala's sober. Do you believe in Lala? I don't believe in Lala. I believe in her. I believe that her sobriety is a real thing. It's like a weird new church. I believe in law, you in law law. Today for communion, we're tasting our own pussies. Yeah.

Pussy of Christ, blood of the pussy of Christ. All right, drink up, motherfuckers. Jesus walked on water and I walk on fried chicken for a hand. So Dana is like, so Dana pulls she knows out because now she's heard from Lala and from Brett that she knows mad. if I had the chicken for a hand. So Dana's like, so Dana pulls Shina aside because now she's heard from Lala and from Brett that Shina's mad. And I have to admit Ronnie, I tried as best I could

to write down everything, but once Shina started talking, I just couldn't even follow it. So basically, I did two, I read about it three times and I was like, I can't, I cannot, because Shina was talking about what Max said to her and what she said to Brad so so basically Dana pulls aside she and because there are many things I want to deal with on my birthday and I don't want to deal with some bullshit from you I'm very confused right now what did you say to Max and say um I felt like I said it to her friends I like I felt that was

weird for him and so what a Max is his friends for you guys. Like go out. And then he was like, yeah. And then, but right, I asked if it was cool. But then I was like, ah, well, that kind of bothered me because he asked, Brad if it was cool. But then you didn't ask me if it was cool. And she's like, but I did ask you. And she's like, no, you thought you asked me

what I thought about you guys going out. Like after you'd already gone out. So she is saying like, you didn't ask my permission to go out and to see if it would hurt my feelings, but you're not best friends with data. You were a bitch to her until five minutes ago. So it's not the same thing as Max and Brett. She's just backpedaling because she's been caught

and so she just keeps spewing out about to bullshit basically. Yeah, but to me when I washed it, it sounded more like, no, me when I watched it sound, it sounded more like, no, like you went out with Max and then I was like, okay, well, okay, you're not with Max and we're with Brett, but like I was hang on with Brett,

and Brett's like one of my best friends, and then I called Max, and like, why is she going out with Brett? You know what she's going on with Brett? Max was like, yeah, Brett, like I know that Brett, but I didn't really know that Brett, and I was like, I didn't know about Brett too, and I'm like, I'm not mad, I'm not mad either,

but I was like, but I am sort of like, but not a thing about it, I am sort of upset, but not like this, but more like that. And he was like, yeah, I'm of like, but not think about it I am sort of upset, but not like this, but more like that and he was like, yeah, I'm upset you And so then I was like, okay, so the bread was like this and I was like, well, why don't you say this to me? I'm on my face and then I'm writing the max and then Dana to my face and not to my face and like I'm not mad or anything But like to my face and brand max brand that max and max and max and Dana, you know? Yeah, I ended that section of notes with dot dot dot. I can't follow low this shit. I wrote down literally cannot write down what she was saying.

Something about max being upset. And then Dana goes, well, Max doesn't get a vote. Yeah, I learned that from Brad earlier. We're already influencing each other. Yeah. Just like that governor from Georgia, did I do that well already? I don't remember. So Lala then goes up to Sheena and she's like,

what are you fighting about Shishu and Lala's like, and she's like, well, those are my life as whole thing. And Lala is it though? Is it? I don't have feelings for Brent. Like maybe in the future, I'll have feelings for him, but I don't have feelings for him right now. I'm like, if you think you're going to have feelings for Brent in the future, it does not mean you have feelings for him right now don't have feelings from right now. I'm like if you think you're gonna have feelings from right in the future, doesn't that mean you have feelings from right now? Am I crazy? Well, I was like, uh, but don't you notice that there's always a guy that you're doing this way? I'm like, oh my god, like what? There's always a guy that you say is just your friend, just your best friend. She's, um, yeah, because I like to have a single

guy who's my past friend. Not just all this. I'm falling because yeah, but you wanted, you had feelings for every single one of those guys. Just be honest about your feelings, cause, okay, I'm on this. I cry every single day. But it's not about data. It's not about math. It's not about bra. It's my life. It's my life.

Like I'm doing math. I'm the half'm doing best I'm you have a single And I'm divorced and I'm just doing this for a baby Okay, well that's a step forward you're opening up yeah opening up to Lala you moron. I know she's like I'm just you know, I'm like I'm doing this for like a maybe it's like it's like walking to a corner and yelling corner and then finding out It's so straight. Whoa. And for she, she's like, oh, it's so frustrating to see everyone around me having what I want, you know, I just didn't think this is where I would be at 34. At the old, old weatherd age of 34.

And Lala, Lala so helpful. She goes, I didn't mean to trigger you. Have you tested your vagina lately? So then we see Lisa with Brett. Lisa has a lady boner for Brett and she's like, oh, Brett will this, why you look, I'm sorry, Brett, non-will this. Why do you look so worried and Brett's's like, um, because I'm causing a rockess with a girl's. Ha ha ha ha ha. Crossing a ruckus. What the fuck is he doing?

He's totally doing the jack thing where he's just being like this. Like cute Cavalier guy at Alisa. He's like, I'm gonna use old timey language. I'm causing quite a ruckus with all these ladies. I know. And she's like, just enjoy the ride. And he's like, I haven't had a ride yet. Best ride I've had is in your car. And she's like, oh, Brett. Brett, Brett, Brett, you need a sexy seahorse. What am I gonna do with you?

And he basically is like, he's like, yeah, well, if you said you wanted to make it right now, I wouldn't turn you away. I was like, ew, stop that. Yeah, and he tells us, hey, I'm respectful. I respect Ken, but I have a feeling when I'm around her and it's awesome because she just makes me so happy. And then he does that kind of weak thing to the camera. The feeling is called money.

You smell money, you manhore. Yeah. And then Charlie is, they're all taking group pictures and Charlie's boob keeps falling out and Jackson's just sitting there like, leering at her boobs. Like little red riding that's happening before our eyes. So, wow, grandma, what giant fillers you have. So, Stasi is then like telling Bo that there's drama about Vegas because now Kristen knows etc. And But then she turns it into her own

Her own thing. She's like, I know I shouldn't be involved. It's not my wedding. I get it. I'm never gonna be engaged. Bo And then he's like babe, we're gonna be together forever, Baba. Until we die. We're gonna die We're gonna grow old and die together, Baba. And then he's like babe we're gonna be together forever Baba until we die. We're gonna die We're gonna grow old and die together Baba and then cake time and Everybody starts getting cake all over each other's face Mackey and Danes, which I hate I felt like my entire life like I left Like I thought my I left my entire life behind a Seattle and I thought my first birthday here was gonna be macaroni and hot dogs But like to have to have all of this all of these people celebrating me

I mean less than a year after I got this gig by hanging out with Peter in a bathroom I mean just you just never know where life is gonna take you do you? You never know so yeah, so she's blowing out the cake and then Tom's end of all pushes her face into the cake And it's like last rowing cake on everyone and Charlie is like me. She just like bolts out of there. She's like, I don't do that. I don't do that. I don't do that. But then the cake gets on her anyway. And we see this shot of this like homely girl just wiping down Charlie's face and Charlie's going, my skincare routine can't afford this. And then Brett and Dana have cake all over their face. And they start making out in front of everyone.

Some poor she was like, oh my God. Are they already married to? She does like urgently calling San Diego, cancel the penguin, cancel the program. If anyone touches me with this cake, I'm gonna fucking lose my shit. And then they showed like the Vanderpump rules cast picture and poor Sheenat, like I think talking about getting old

and whether he is like aging Sheenat because that picture where they're all just sitting there. She looks like an old tellin' novella star, like the old 80 year olds were like, oh hey, I'm gonna do this for me. novella start like the old 80 year olds were like oh you get to walk around every day What like a month ago she goes I walked to the new kids could fly Well there you go Scener okay everybody that brings us to the end of Vanderpoop drools We will be back tomorrow with summer house and all week we have new episodes coming out every single day of Target King you can get that this audio and regular patreon or as video is part of Crappens on demand on

Crappens on demand Patreon. Also, we are doing our live show The Forget. So week from Friday, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, we will be on Instagram at 6 p.m. Pacific Time, 9 p.m. Eastern, and then we're gonna move over at 6.30 p.m. to Crappens on demand DeBan to do a live stream. We will talk to you next time. Bye everyone. you. you Hey, prime members, you can listen to WaterCrapins Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey.