Watch What Crappens - PumpRules: Girl's Trippin'

Episode Date: February 13, 2019

The girls of Vanderpump Rules take the pj to Solvang and Jax pretends he's above therapy. Also, James' mother is a monster. To hear this week's bonus episode about the Grammys and our trip to Dallas, become a Patreon member at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. ***New Limited Edition Shirts! Countess Luann Warhol Pop Art avail through February! **Crappens Live is coming to Dallas next week on Feb 8 and 9, then we're hitting up the Just For Laughs Comedy fest in Vancouver. Then Cincinnati, Portland, Phoenix, Boston, Irvine, Milwaukee, and Minneapolis. Find ticket links at watchwhatcrappens.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chas, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch what crap ends would like to think its premium sponsors?

Aaron McNickolas, she don't miss no trickle-ists. Just saying, okay? Kristi Wawardy-Dawardy. Ashley Savoni, she don't take nobel-owny. Kelly Barlow, when she goes Barlow, we go high-low. Megan Berg, he can't have a burger without the Berg. Ain't no thing like Allison King. Megan the Slayer Taylor.

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Soul okay with Wellington to pray. And Lizzie Drucker, a fine mother f- We love you guys. I have come to the prayer of the prayer of the prayer love you guys! I've got a cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, cramp, Hello and welcome to Watch What Happens, the podcast about all that crap we just love to talk about on EO Brahms, I'm Ronny Karram, I'm also on the Rose for Expatsular Rose podcast which is Step Our Find, so please don't subscribe, you know, that'd be helpful. And Ben Mandelkab, my little partner in co-host is here. Ben is also the creator of Real Housewares of Kitchen Island, which is a cartoon that you can find on YouTube.

It's fantastic. Go watch it. Thank you. Hi, what's up? Nothing. I'm so depressed. I just watched VantroPrompt rules. I mean, what the hell would this show, okay?

Yeah, I'm depressed, too, but that's mainly because I didn't have time to go out to get Starbucks before this. So I brewed my own. I did too. That was good. My parents know me they have little to go cups with straws. Look at that. Oh yeah. I have a packet of straws up and using sorry turtles as you like to say. Yeah, sorry. But anyway, I'm letting the coffee hit me because once the coffee hits me, then I'll be very excited and I'm hoping that the coffee kicks in right when we get to the J. Backland scene because then I'll be caffeinated and ready to go off on her.

Ready to go off. Okay everyone, well welcome to the show today obviously is Vander Pooh rules and we're going to be doing that. What do I want to say? I'm in Austin right now so great here and I'm going to be back here with Ben because we're going to be doing South by Southwest. Whoa! here and I'm going to be back here with Ben because we're going to be doing South by Southwest. Whoa. Whoa. What date has that been? I believe it's March 12.

I think it's like 12.30 p.m. So it's like a it's a lunch hour with crap in guys at South by Southwest. I'm so excited. It's such a I've never been to South by Southwest. I've only heard stories about it. It just seems like a place for famous people and it's shocking that we get to be part of it. Yeah, it's going to be super fun. So we're going to be there.

You can find the ticket links at watchwitcrapants.com as well as for all of our live shows. We're going to be at the just for last comedy festival in Vancouver soon. That's next week. Next week. So come see that people in Vancouver. Damn it. Get over there. And then we're going to be going to Cincinnati.

We added another show in Cincinnati. We're going to be doing a daytime show there, drinking shows. So come day drink with us at 3 p.m. right before the other show in Cincinnati. So it's going to be a fun crap and stay. And then we've got another show in Boston that we added. So buy tickets for that.

And then we're going to come to Milwaukee, Portland, Phoenix. Hold on, Milwaukee, Portland, Phoenix, um, hold on Milwaukee, Portland Phoenix, Irvine, Jesus Minnesota, Minnesota. I mean, what the hell? So we're out for a lot. So come get ticket links at watchupcrapins.com, and you'll a lot, uh, your Luan, Delice, and he will. Oh, T shirts and leggings are available for like three more weeks. So get out of the package. Leonard says, Ben sing the song. Well, I'm glad the song is getting traction. Even though the song has not actually become official. No, we'll get that song.

Okay, people. Okay, no song today. The song maybe the song will be back tomorrow. And I'm already depressed. Okay. Just kidding. Just kidding, being sorry, letter. Also, today we are on TV party streaming live, which is why we're talking to Leonard and other people on there. These are available as after streams as well. If you want, you can stream them to your Apple TV or whatever. Just go on to our Patreon. Okay, that's also where our bonus episodes are. We talked about the Grammy Awards and our trip to Dallas and grocery shopping. That's what we talked about this week, okay?

It's like the Grammy Awards and grocery shopping. Yeah, exactly. That's right, I forgot we spoke about, oh, I had a real issue with Sprouts on the bonus episode this week, real, real issue. And then I also, I was so fired up from talking about Sprouts that then I just like cast Venom across all the Grammy's.

I was like, and then Alicia Keys, to be out of I mean yeah you took it out you took your Sprout Tangerab on or Alicia Keys I really did so to all the artists at the Grammys who I projected my Sprouts rage onto you I apologize also Alicia Keys sings like she's sprouting she's always like it sounds like what a sprout would sound like while it's struggling to come out. Yeah, pretty much. So today is Vander Pomp rules. And we start out with a really good, tricky monocle song with Mordelier X and

I think she's ever written in her life because this one is, think you can do whatever you want with that consequences, baby. You think you can do whatever you want with that consequences baby you think you can say whatever you want to think you got it made but honey you got a rude awakening and I'm like whoa that is a lot of lyrics someone got a verse she's like Paul Paul I want to write my masterpiece I want to be I want this song to be the one that I'm remembered by okay I want to put lyrics okay I don't want hooks I want lyrics I want at least four lines in the first verse pole I want this to be my Harry stars moment when I say fuck it I don't care what pop music sounds like I'm

doing my own thing speaking of Harry styles we sure got a Harry non styles today. Yeah, Harry on stylish plus isn't hard. We can't make friends a child. Children are off limits. And apparently dentists too. Oh, you see I'm the nice one guys. Well, I need just that to get my caffeine in me. And people who were watching on TV party saw that I not only said that, and then I sit from my little yellow straw which made it more nasty. So that's how how we started out and Vanderpromp's coming in and talking to Peter who's always

around now but still not saying much. He's like a semi-cute lurch. Yeah. He's just kind of there lurking around. And you know, since after our bonus episode, I then watched the rest of the Grammys or at least as much as my DVR recorded, even when they have our extension. So it wasn't enough apparently, apparently. And now having watched a big chunk of the rest of the Grammys, I was like, oh, that is

so cool that Peter has Brandy Carlisle's hair. Yeah, he's trying to go for that lesbian look that they were doing with Duolipa and what's her bends. Yeah, he needs, he needs to straighten it and just put like a lot of pomade in it and like learn to guitar quarter to you. Yeah, well, he's trying to go for Dua Lipa, but he's winding up as Brandy Carlisle. Yeah, that's, you're missing the mark there, buddy. Yeah.

He needs a bow low. So he's like, oh, I have a hangover. I didn't even drink that much at Tomatoma. It must have been this strong cock. It was that scorpion's also that I kept shooting back there. Still feeling that I woke up singing Gringa fire. Get it! I only had but two cocktails. I can't believe this. And then of course we see a flashback of her drinking like ten cocktails doing kegs and in a year bomb like all of us like all of us this weekend My mom's like I haven't even had anything to drink and then a video shows up her on Facebook like wasted

Yeah, so yeah, Vanderpump's like I haven't been that snuck it since 1983 when we had our house in Ibiza I got pregnant that night. I got pregnant that night I got pregnant that night. I die, I got pregnant that night. G-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g Trying to get a new bone through the to the metal detector It was not easy darling Yes, giving birth to pan bandy and the bees. I was crazy. She came out wearing a headband and feathers in her hair So the Tom's enter and they're now just treating Lisa like she's an old folks home Have you noticed noticed Heather talking to her? I mean, bring it up, hail the cleaner, but basically you is how they're talking to her. They're like, Lisa, hi, we brought you cookie. You want

cookie? You want me much banana for you? Did you roll? What are you talking like that again? Like, we can only wear so many pussy bows before we start treating, getting treated like that, you know. She's wearing like dual layer pussy bows these days. She's got like, she's got a lot of pussy bows. Okay, at certain point, if you wear enough pussy bows, people are just going to start treating you like Nani K. Nani K, you know your name, you're truly my friend Ben MacKill.

I passed the test so So yeah, so they walk in and they're all like excited because like Tom's like dude the client was happy They say late we didn't run cocktails no one fell in the toilet. They didn't have a seat. It was amazing Yeah, and Todd number two is like I cleaned the toilet with the tampon. We're rock stars. Yeah, he's slurring so many things, it's exciting. Yeah, well, we don't have gas still, so we'll just be training the staff, but then we need lighting, gardening, food tasting.

Oversize planters, where are those? Stir straws human trafficking victims to carry drinks back and forth. Chilean sea bass, of course, also known as Patagonian, toothbrush. A chair left in case Ken wants to get up to the kitchen to have... Run food! Heh. Beat soup, we must have beat soup.

Heh heh heh. You thought the hard work began, but now the hard work begins. Can't wait to see how hard they work. He's like, okay, it's an open light for your bartending shift. Yeah, it's like so press this I could turn back a lane. Time, time, time. Anyway, after a lane. Okay, so the girls are Ariana, Kristen and Katie. Is it? No, Lala, not yet. Kristen Lala. So mad. Look, why am I so mad right now and I didn't have any reason to be? Katie's not even in the scene. I can say.

Could you tell Lala was in the scene because when we just saw the exterior of the farm, all we hear is, hi, boo boo. I was like, oh, Lala. Boo boo, she's old. Boo boo, boo boo, boo boo. Boo boo, boo boo, boo boo, boo boo. R-I. Chris Chris.

She's turning into a Saturday morning cartoon. But like a really dirty one. I'm not going to be a little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit

little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit little bit bit little bit little bit bit little bit a smurf that is like the smurf that has a private plane. And they're like, this feels off brand for our little village. It's like the smurf that shows up in a range Rover at the dam. You got her private mushroom Rover or whatever. So Kristen comes in and she comes in just like she comes into every scene. She's like, oh, she literally comes tumbling into the scene. It was so funny. I couldn't see you tumble because you're still frozen on TV party going like this

Frozen in time you're frozen in nick of lane. Mm-hmm. So Yeah, so they're like so why weren't you at the big Tom Tom party Chris? They found Alma So they're like, so why weren't you at the big Tom Tom parting? Chris, they got all know. Well, that's so funny. Ariana's like, God, it was really fun. Where were you, Kristen? Tom didn't tell me at all what issues he had with the guest list and Lisa. Well, at least she didn't try to say we fought for you, because we all know that that would be a damn lie. Mm-hmm.

So, Kristen's like, um, Lisa didn't want me there. Oh, and then I'm like, why not? And she's like, um, Lisa didn't want me there. Um, and I'm like, why not? And she's like literally no clue. Whether Lisa likes it or not, seriously, seriously, I'm part of the Sarah family like, sorry, I say, and it'd be a lot easier for both of us if she just accepted it. Like you're not part of the Sarah family.

Yeah, you, you basically were horrific there, and you were fired, and then you also tried to, I think you tried to, she tried to quit too, but you're not part of the Sir family. You're no longer, you know how to work there. You're on the band-in-fam rules family. Yeah, and just because I can't repeat this enough, work is not your family, okay?

And I'm sick of people, especially in restaurants, working in restaurants, we're all like a family here. Oh, really? Because I can yell at people in my family. You can't yell at people at work. Yeah. It's not your family, okay? It's people at work.

Yeah. You're tipped. Exactly, okay. I need tips to be with my family. I deserve a tip. My microphone is resting on a goddamn candle. Look. Did you ever find, did you ever get in touch

with the microphone, Robert? I mean, what's he gonna do? Drive it from Colleen or wherever the hell he lives. I don't need that. I called my assistant. Put it in a box to mail it to you. I called my assistant. Her name is Amazon Prem.

Oh, she's bringing me a new mic stand tomorrow for $20. Wow. Oh, okay. Well, either way. So Lala's like, well, excuse, excuse, Christine. Um, she invites her on the trip to Solvang, which makes Kristen very excited. But we also learned that things have gone slightly

awry with a card of these days. Apparently, Carter and Kristen have been fighting over a lot of stuff, which is surprising because I didn't know the card was even capable of like showing more than a passing interest in anything that wasn't involving like beer caps and paperclips. I know, and he always talks like this. He's like a, he talks from the School of Catherine from Southern Charm or. Yeah. He's like Stone probably, he's probably Stone

that all everywhere. Yeah, he's always like really super calm. So seeing a fight with him, it must be really infuriating for someone like Kristen who wants to scream in the Eleanor Throes shit at the wall to be arguing with someone who's like yeah but I already walked the dogs. It's like oh stop getting quieter. I hate that. I hate when people do that. When you're mad and you're like I'm mad. I'm we're gonna talk

about it. Okay well why don't you lower your voice a little bit. Why don't you fucking raise your voice a little bit. How about that? Why don't you fucking raise your voice a little bit how about that? Did Ben quit you got so quiet. I wasn't even sure if you were still there That's like fuck I was like mad here. I was like wait what You all right? I was like wait what's happening here? So she's she's like yeah things look me in Carter like the worst right now. I'm like, I don't even know what's happening Oh, and they're like, well at least we're gonna have this trip or whatever and Ariana's like, yeah Your anxiety won't kick in because we're not too far. Kristen's anxiety does not come from distance, okay?

When did that come up? She travels all over the place since when does she have a problem with distance? I think Kristen's anxiety kicks in when she's let loosens the outside world. She's just like, oh, oh, she's just picking up things. It's like those movies you see where time travelers, like cavemen come to modern times, and they're shocked at fire hydrants and wheels and light bulbs. That's what happens to Kristen when she leads the wheel.

She's like, ooh, ooh. She's just shocked at everything. Like an exit sign in the restaurant. Like, don't tell me to leave. Move. I like that Carter told her, he's like, you know, you're just so overbearing. I'm like, do you know who's hard to date?

Yeah, that's here. The end of like our signature. I feel like people who date people from the show have no right to complain because you already, it's like, it's not like you just looked at their Tinder profile and they lied to you. You literally saw them on like seasons and seasons of TV being awful human beings, you know?

Yeah, I agree. So anyway, so some rosé arrives, but La La decides not to have some because we. I mean, man, brand and I, we just got really sloshed. And like, I just went crazy and just like broke a hurricane proof window. So Lala's not drinking anymore. Lala's not drinking anymore. But that doesn't mean that I can't get my bitches crank.

Which is annoying because I feel like Lala's gonna be an annoying silver person, you know? Yeah, because Lala's the kind of person who talks about how silver she is annoying sober person, you know? Yeah, because Lala's the kind of person who talks about how sober she is everywhere she goes, you know? Yeah, yeah, exactly. Cause she'll do that thing to be like, no, no, I'm cool. Like, I don't care.

Like, I'm not drinking, but I can still have a fun time even though I'm not drinking and then then she'll turn around and be like, oh my God, I am too sober for this right now. Like, don't sober, shame people. And then like, pry yourself and think sober. Just be one of the other. Yeah, that's why I was always surprised that Java D2 had never made it in West Hollywood. That's the place that Pump is now and it because pump I don't know if we talked about this before on the show But the least of underpump restaurants are all a block away from a a okay

It's not even a block away. It's literally on the same block So when you're going between all the gay bars and sir Sir's like right below all the gay bars. So when you're going between them You're passing all the guys from AA and it's like so guilt inducing because yeah, usually I'm drunk Like I threw up in front of AA one time. I mean that was horrible, you know I mean they invited me in but I mean that was nice, but you know It's awkward. And so I thought Java Detour would make it

because you can really only hang around other sober people when you're sober, right? I mean, I could, I couldn't hang out with me if I was sober. Right. Yeah, it's hard. It's really hard, I would imagine. Like, I, I, just in general life, even not being like capital S sober.

If I'm ever at a party, everyone's drunk and I'm sober, it's annoying, because drunk people, by the way, are annoying. Yeah, yeah, I am one. So yeah, I mean, not currently, not right now, but you guys right now I'm sober. So see, wasn't that annoying? Didn't that just annoy that one of everybody?

For the majority of people. That's what I'm talking about. Everything. So they're talking about how obnoxious Kristen is, and Mama's like, this trip is for the majority of everything. So they're talking about how obnoxious Kristen is, and Mama's like, this trip is for the girls who were there for me when pops passed. And Kristen's annoying as fuck, but she was there for me, so she's coming.

And she's like, yeah, I don't wanna have to go back to my hotel room with Carter and be like up to 5 a.m. and all of those guys and the wake up and pretend everything's okay. I don't even know if I understand what that means. I think she meant on a regular trip everybody parties in her room on like the guys come over to her room. Oh yeah, and then it makes her mad because Carter doesn't kick them out. And I think I'm ready for Carter to be to be done to be gone. I'm ready for Carter to be out. Carter brings nothing, okay?

Carter, you bring nothing to this team. You're fired, okay? Yeah, they're not, like he doesn't bring anything good out of Kristen, he doesn't like make her better or worse. He's just sort of like there. And whenever I think of Carter, I just always think of Turtles because I feel like one of their first dates

they went and watched Turtle Racing in Santa Monica. And so whenever I think of him, I just think of Turtles. And that's, I think actually the perfect image for Carter, like a little slow amphibian that just goes like this. Oh, I hate smacking noises. Do not make mouth noises. Well, that's, it's card. I'm sorry, it's not me. It's Carter. But that makes it a little harder. But that makes it a little harder anymore. When I think of Carter, I think of like biblical characters because in Bible school, we used to have to make these felt murals and cut out Bible characters and they all had that like same beard, you know?

Like that same like just short haired beard thing because you can use long hair and felt murals. But he just looks like a felt mural Bible character. Like Joseph, he looks like he's- Can we have a compromise, like a felt mural turtle? Yes, felt mural Bible turtle. Yes, that would have totally helped the Bible be more interesting.

If Joseph was a turtle. Yeah, and that's why he couldn't impregnate Mary and so God had to. God, the Bible's getting interesting today. I mean, who says he wasn't a turtle, right? Did was there any evidence that he was an actual human? We didn't have iPhone spec this. How would we know?

I don't know. I didn't have iPhone spec this. How would we know? I don't know. I don't know new testament stuff. Yeah, I know. That's where it gets real fun. That's where it gets nice. And everyone's like, just hug. You're going to have to sacrifice your children anymore. Yeah, let's do this.

Yeah. You messed the best part, Ben. OK. This wasn't nice. Well, what'd you say you were cutting out? I was gonna say, what did you say? Because you were cutting out. Let me tell you what.

Okay, this is what's happening and why we're cutting out. I'm on regular people internet. Okay, I don't have a lot of money. I'm at home. So God knows what's going on in this house. Dad's probably down on some real estate website. Like let's make some views You know, so who knows?

So that's if anyone's getting cut out that's why why don't we move on to the end of the seventh Why yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Yeah, the end of the seventh ray You know I need six rays and that's funny that this is the seventh one They were all brothers right Ray, Ray, Ray, Ray, Ray, Ray. And Ray, see, we really want to have our engagement party to play this called Ray to remind us of how far Jackson's come since he saw some Ray bands. So, Jackson, Brittany, Katie and Stasi, this would be awkward going with anybody, but do you really need to go with your long time ex-girlfriend?

I know, exactly. By the way, this is such an ominous sounding. I'm sure the seventh ray probably has like a really lovely ethereal definition. Like it's the seventh ray of light, but me it sounds scary the end of the seventh ray I'm like this it sounds like a really cheap horror movie yeah I'm like I'm not who who has to be sacrificed Well I guess depending on who has to be sacrificing be a great thing but I'll say it sounds really terrifying Just forget it's dignity yeah exactly here's a bit of cream cheese and beer cheese, but I mixed together and I am giving it as offering to the altar of the Enoch, the seventh Ray. Yeah. So they show it, but the end of the seventh Ray. Yeah. Yeah. And um, Brittany's like, Katie, tell me to look at this place. And then they just cut to Katie looking so smug like yeah, I

Had no goal. Yeah Don't trust Katie. She's gonna sabotage this wedding She doesn't want you guys to get married and she doesn't want you to have anything better than a Wednesday wedding of the woods Okay, don't listen to Katie. You would have a better party at Dave and Buster's than anything Katie will help you with Yeah, honestly like it actually like the end of the seventh Ray AA, I could see how at night it'll be really pretty, but during the day, it just looked dirty and dusty and lots of dead leaves hanging around.

I'm sorry, that's just how it felt. I feel like we didn't get the full experience because they were like, do not let that trash all over the end of the seventh Ray. This is safe for Scientology. Yeah, they probably cordoned off the nice part of the end of the seventh ray and just gave them like the like the area that's like behind the generator. Like here, let's put an umbrella up and tell them it's like

pretty. They'll believe it. Yeah. Katie had a Wednesday wedding and they're going to have a behind the outdoor air conditioner wedding, you know. Yeah. Classiest. Yeah. Exactly. So Britney's like, she's always out for this engagement party and she wants it to look like a Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, retail at that, you know, the seventh way, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, Most of Frog is already turned into a prince. You don't plan a wedding with him. Okay.

You're on the wrong fucking fairy tale. Idiot. Of course, you need to be as fairy tale. Yeah, not all fairy tales are not so well. Okay. Yeah. Of course, he's doing fairy tales wrong. Yeah.

You know, she is doing fairy tales wrong because she's getting married to an oversized Rumble Silskin. Yeah. Who never can guess his own riddles. He doesn't even know why he's there. He's just like a rumble-soul-skinned and existential crisis. Yeah. So she tells us, I am obsessed with my reason. I totally thought they were real. Like, okay, Forest. Like, enough with this. You're like, she's getting more ridiculous every episode.

It's like my meme, every time we talk, where she talks more thick, we're like, how are you getting a thicker accent? How many times do you think that like, Jack walks in to the room and Britney's just in there like, trying to like, resuscitate Tinkerbell? Oh God, he's on top of her. That's why tinkerbell can never get out. Just keep clapping and tell jacks gets off a tinkerbell everybody. I'm gonna try hard to make time. Jack said sex and tinkerbell while tinkerbell is taking care of an old fairy. Yeah really. Tinkerbell loses her health care, her home health care job.

Yeah, really, Tinkerbell loses her home healthcare job. It goes on an MTV show. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crap and it's commercial. Celebrity beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife. And I'm Sydney Battle. and we're the host of Wonder E's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic

celebrity feud from the buildup, why it happened, and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feud say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood, how much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling and how much of it is a

carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums. Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon music or wonder ya. So, Britney is so excited for this party. She's like, I've been buying decorateations for the off of Amazon for the past month. I'm like, she's a monster. Have we addressed the fact that she has turned into a total monster? She is like the moment that like this, like she's been waiting her all up. She's been keeping it in and in this moment, like, will you marry me? It's just all coming out now.

And she's just a total engagement monster disaster. Well, I think if you get engaged to someone and their worst quality is going on Amazon And buying like dollar streamers because you know that's what she's doing. Yeah, I think that that's pretty good Well, no, I mean obviously she's I mean that like She is she's almost like the opposite of a bridezilla because she's not like a nasty bride by any means But she's just like all like all she can see and think about is her wedding. My wedding, my wedding, my wedding, my wedding, my wedding. And then we're the wedding. Yeah, it's just like, oh my God, girl, you got to calm down.

I know because you know that Britney's just one of those people that next it's like, it's my baby, it's my baby, it's my baby, it's my baby. You know, this is when they just start. Yeah, the baby is going to be the real problem. Yeah, just because talking gonna be the real problem. Yeah, we're just just talking. She's gonna have, you know, she's gonna have, yeah,

she's gonna have all sorts of uninteresting anecdotes about how her baby is like, you know, he's real smart, you know, like the other day, I was like, you want a banana and he like, Google that me and I was like, you made Google the eyes, I should say, he can't use Google yet, but then again, neither can I, you know, it's hard, you know. Maybe it's like I can

Yeah, she's gonna be a lot like my babyness man to ran like to read yeah, exactly Yeah, so they're basically Jackson's freaking out because everything they say of course cost money because you're at a venue Where you can have a party, you know, so the ladies like, if you want them to sit at tables, that'll be $5. If you want them to have four, it's $6. If you want them to have napkins, that'll be $8. If you want your invitation sprinted on napkins, I'm sorry, we don't do that because we're actually classy people. They're like, it was worth it. It was a long wind up, but it was worth it. The end of the seventh ray has been waiting for years to stick one to Katie. When we got a phone call from the end of the sixth ray up in Tahoe, we were a gas. And we've been waiting for this moment. Yeah, we have shamed your tea towels.

And we've been waiting for this moment. Yeah, we have shamed your tea towels. So Jack, you're not even fit for the seventh ray. Third, the seventh, sorry. I'm just loving this place. Seventh ray, Romano. So yeah, Jack's is like, he's like, I only see dollar signs. Like is that what we're calling cocaine now?

Get it. Get it. Get it. So he's like sounds expensive. So God that really cleared me out. Actually, that breaks. Yeah, and then he's like, yeah, this sounds expensive. And he's like, yep, they are. But he knows how won't it.

I was like, oh God, this is just going in the wrong direction. He's basically bribing her. That's what it is. He's bribing her. Yeah, and it's just so sad But this is like you're right, especially the same episode with lava's like my god god of the PJ and Britney's like I got streamers for my Amazon So then they revealed that they're gonna be going to therapy tomorrow because um You know when you get married in the Catholic church you have to go to wedding counseling for a year marriage counseling or couples counseling for a year ahead of time and he's like yeah like it's been that's

like just the rule of Catholicism like the Pope made it up. I'm like yes I'm sure the Pope in like 12 AD was like everyone goes see my therapist. I mean, go on top text or whatever that. Yeah, I'm surprised that Jack's actually goes to an actual human being and doesn't just do that talk one that text one. We are like, uh, everything's great. Totally great. Don't want to talk about it anymore. And she's like,

that will be $20. He is like doing like a Buzzfeed survey. No, I mean, I know that the Catholic Church, you do have to do. I thought you're supposed to just meet with like the, with the priest for like a year and a half. Yeah, I'm sorry. Preca, you, yeah, you have to meet with the priest. It's not just go to whatever therapist you want to. Therapist.

You have to meet with the priest. Is it a preacher or a priest? I think it's a priest. Yeah, Catholic priest. He's probably afraid to go to preca, because he dated her like four years ago and doesn't want to bring you to meet her. No kidding. He's like, oh my God, I can't go to pre-kana because he dated her like four years ago and doesn't want to bring you to meet her. No kidding. He's like, oh my god, I can't go to pre-caron. I can't go to pre-kara.

I've already totally pre-dinked Kara. Okay. In pre-kana. Oh, Nana. What's my name? Oh, Nana. What's my name? I love pre-kana.

Nana. Oh, Nana. Oh, Nana. Oh, Nana. That's how she. That's how she got her beer cheese recipe. Oh, Nanna. That's the recipe.

Oh, Nanna. Man, Moscow. It's someone's Nanna. If you think about it, Rihanna does sort of sing like, like Brittany. I mean, I'm really, Ella, Ella, Ella, Ella like, I like, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, how cheap Jack's is. And Jack's is like, or Stas is like, Jack's has always been cheap. Like his soul sunglasses for Britney. He stole a wallet for me.

He is the steel ship from the gas station cause he was cheap to buy his lunch. I don't even think that's cheaper to speak up. C I'm talking loser. Who hangs out with someone like that? And also, whoever they go, okay. Exactly. And also, like, I mean, my goodness, his palate. He's stealing from a gas station. No kidding. No wonder you had to get boob surgery. I'm almost there, by the way. I'm not judging. I know. I'm just going to get boob surgery. I'm going to get my boob's up to my face, okay?

I want to fall asleep like Big Bird. Just like putting my head down and be able to like rest them in my beautiful breasts. Haha. So, we now go over to Sir at night and it's like busy times at the restaurant. We see Shina. She's like, are you guys doing okay? Great. Okay. Bye. Yeah. I feel so bad for the waiters there because everybody's basically sitting on the floor like a Moroccan restaurant. You have to, she's like, I'm everybody.

You can't just have a normal day at work. They must have terrible backs over there. Yeah, they must. I mean, those really are very low tables with very furry menus. So yeah, so we just sort of see everything, like all the craziness. There's a guy who looks like Edgar Winter in the corner,

just like with long blonde hair, just like, yeah, follow me to just say. Yeah, sir, I did it. Mm-hmm. As soon as Peter's like, Britney, Britney, which is kind of all Peter does now, is just walking and say people's names.

Lisa, Britney, Which is kind of all Peter does now. It's just walking and say people's names. Lisa Britney Sheena Yeah, and she's a hot Peter. How you doing? Where you want me to be? That's my favorite. Really? What a fairy tale. I love fairy tale. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And Lisa is still like, I'm a fairie tie, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah friends. Yeah, so now since the girls are going to be doing a whole like trip to Solvang.

Now the guys are going to be planning a pro night at the Mondrian. So Tom's doing that, which is fun. Yeah, but the girls don't know that they're doing that yet. So they're still half, they're still happy. They're like, girls, champs and she's cleaning the menu and she's like, oh my, I'm, like I'm stuffing these menus. I'm like, so I'll see the. Well, cleaning the menus is serious considering the CD. What the shit down even Denny's does that? Okay.

I can't believe I drove all the way from Marina to Albright, just to clean a menu. Like what is in my life? Am I right, everyone? Am I right? Hi, Rose. Me. I'm signing on a Sheena's marina.

Sheena from Marina. Can we please change out on the Sheena's marine Sheena from arena. Can we please change all the computer? Thanks. She's like trying to tap the computer with her nails. So there's like this really like kind of dump scene where like their girl is like, oh my god, it's so exciting for that girl's trip. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, oh, but I haven't asked for time off yet. Let me go see if these are band or pump the executive producer of our show asked for time off yet. Let me go see if Lisa Banderpum, the executive producer of our show, will approve time off so we can go on a girls trip

like we do every single season. Yeah. We have, they literally have nothing going on in this show. Let's face it. Okay, let's just, as huge fans of this show, let's just face it. They ain't got nothing. If they're gonna pretend like Lisa has anything

to do with this. Yeah. Also, I have to mention that Jack, the first thing Jack said when he heard guys trip, he's like, okay, so should I stop off and get some dildos? Oh, yeah, he did say that. Yeah, that explains a lot about this group of friends, you know, and he probably just told bring you there just more party favors for the way that for the

engagement party. Oh, good. So, so it's like a fairy tale. So they go over to talk to you, they go over the talk to Lisa and ask her for time off. And she's like, what do you want? And Lala's like, um, like we totally are gonna go on a trip and everything's covered Wednesday, Thursday, Friday. And she's like, but Friday is very busy. I must have all of you who work here one day a month

back on Friday. It's very busy. I must have all of you who work here one day a month back Friday You must be back by the stroke of 7 p.m. On Friday or else Or else you should all be cursed. It's a fire We're not back by midnight. I'm gonna turn into a gold If we're not back by midnight jacks'm gonna turn into a gold. If we're not back by midnight, Jackson, turn him into even more of a pumpkin. Oh, and Lala's like, yeah, everything's covered. We're taking the PJs.

We can come back whenever we want. I'm like, you got to love with the hostess of your restaurant, walks up. She's making $10 an hour. She's like, we're taking the page. So we'll be back Friday. And Vanderpump's like, congratulations, you're all for China for me.

It's a very nice work here. Random must have something to do with this ex-copied. She's like, yeah, he's a good guy. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. I'm just This law of the season is not doing for me what I need her to be doing like this is this is not law at her finest I'm not happy with any of this. Yeah I need the series to end with law law finding a rich fat guy to fuck for a PJ

I don't need that to happen in the middle of the show You know what I mean? It's like an arcus finish now because what do you do after that? Like I'm supposed to believe law was really giving a shit about two tops at sir And like I fit two tops at sir, but Vander Prump is playing it anyway She's like Lala is getting a bit Cavalier with her job here. It's her. I feel like I'm working for her what with rescheduling people To go to Saurang people to go to Soran. I just I missed the day is when when we thought that Lala was boning a football player like that. If it were a football player I think it'd be more interesting because we would really sense like it's not I mean we

sense impending doom with Randall anyway like that's never gonna work out but I feel like with a football player it would get really more interesting than Randall anyway, like that's never going to work out. But I feel like with the football player, it would get really more interesting than Randall, you know? Yeah. I feel like it's going to work out with Randall. My feelings are starting to change on this. And here's why I think it's going to work out with Randall because of like it's going to work out with Tom Tom. Like once you've put that much money into remodeling something, you're going to keep it no matter what. And I feel like Randall's basically put a new kitchen on Mama's face and he's not leaving this one, you know. So he's invested is what I'm saying. Yeah.

No, I see. I'm not saying it's going to end anytime soon. I'm just like, you know, like guys like that, I feel like, I don't know, like, I think it's going to last several, several more years, but like I was like that. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Relationship in Los Angeles, you know, that's true. That's true So I mean, I mean let's not forget James's parents were the exact same right like his dad was a manager His mom was a model and now here we are. He's here in therapy because of well, that's different. He lost his money That's true Sorry, yes as long as Randall keeps out putting out a string

of hits like he has been like, oh, yeah, which is just misunderstood. And the row, I'm sure that everything's going to be just fine. Or this new one that is out where Lava is in like the 1920s or something. What is that? And she's like a secretary in the 1920s. And it's like her big puffy face. I will say that. And Botox that on this old poster. I do think that like Randall and Lala are significantly better than Jacqueline and Andres. Is that James's dad's name?

Oh, yeah. Yeah. I mean, you know, I actually feel bad for even making the comparison because honestly, you're right. Randall and Lala are in a much better place. And they seem like much better people. But like Jacqueline, she's a piece of work. And so now we have James, he goes to therapy and he starts talking to the therapist about his parents and everything and like how like when like his dad, like his dad, his mom, like needs money and the dad owes her money and the dad doesn't have the money

so he doesn't give her the money and so then she calls James and then James in the middle and he's I'm supporting everyone, everyone, little James, supporting everyone, you know, but I feel bad because it's like I mean, I feel bad to a point because I'm a lot older but at some point you just gotta be listening to you drunk bitch No, you're cut off. You're not getting money Get a fucking job, okay? That's it period. Oh Yeah, no, I mean I I agree but like he's also you are a lot older and I think that like and I say that mean like we both are a lot older Then he is and he's like 26 or whatever

Unless I think when you're 26 like if you're 26 and your mom is like putting you in this position It's hard to draw that boundary. I think it really is because it's like it's all you know So like fucker basically. Yeah, I know but fucker. Yeah, for sure. Yeah And it's also you know fucking too because here's James It's like he's only going to therapy because he's just making him and then he's still not really taking responsibility for shit So he and I also see that he totally gets that from his mother, because that's what his mother does. It's like blame somebody else.

And it's a cycle of blame, you know, and I get that. But God is fucking depressing to watch on this show. I don't know that I need this. Yeah, I thought it was fascinating actually, because you know, he's so bad how his parents had this big, lavish lifestyle, and cars, and all this stuff. And I was like, well, like, who would have thought?

Like, who would have thought this is where James came from? Of course, of course his parents, like the moment they have some money, they go and spend it all. And then when the money drives up, then they're fucked. Like, of course, you know? Yeah. Really sad.

So Katie's home on her couch folding laundry. Wait, wait, wait, wait, no, no, no, no, sorry. Do you have more? Because then, yes, because then after this whole therapist, oh, you're right. I'm sorry. I was like, I'm depressed. So I scrolled past. Sorry, then I didn't do that on purpose. Go ahead. I'm like mad now. I'm just mad at Jacqueline. But yeah, so he's telling the story and the therapist is like, well, um, James, basically you just said, Ronnie, you have to draw a boundary with your mom. He's like, overall, I will do that. And he's James,

I mean, he is a good student. He decides to do it right that moment. You know, he like leaves the office and he goes downstairs and calls up his mom. He's like, hello, it's your son. You're not allowed to talk to me about dad anymore. You called me yelling about dad and now he doesn't pay your bills. You're not allowed to talk to me about him anymore. No more, no more for James. James. No more. No more. Okay, well Waited is my father that's one way to draw boundary

It's like you really just launched into that advice didn't he? Yeah, and then he's like I provide and I provide and I provide until I cart anymore and then I get yelled at if I can't anymore It's like when does it end it doesn't end okay People like do not just suddenly stop being shitheads and start acting like, oh, maybe I should go to job and support myself. That would make me feel good too late. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. She's got to drive someone else to suck off of. Okay. It's Harry's turn. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. So, um, so now we go to Katie sitting on the couch folding laundry. And I was like, this is really the image that sums up the season. You know, someone like it's sitting in a generally comfortable place, but like not pleasant to look at and doing something that's kind of annoying, which is sort of laundry. Yeah.

And then Tom number two over there pretending he's a drink mixologist now. He's like sitting there with different little jiggers. Like, I'm like, okay, Tom. He just passed the bar. He's like, we know to yeah, not noted. So she's like, are you jealous?

That I'm going to solving. He's like, are you jealous? And I'm mixing orange chasta with seven up coffee and vodka. Okay, meet me there. So, I'm gonna stop the, I'm gonna both Stasi come over. Well, Katie Bocaiti goes, yeah, sorry. Is that am I right? I don't know. I don't know. I think you're right. I may be I may be wrong.

That's Stasi and Boca him over and Katie's like, um, I was just trying to make Tom jealous. And Stasi's like, um, I'm jealous. Why she saying that? And she's like, Oh, yeah, that's right. You've never been on a private jet before Katie because she's been on one now because she went with Well, she's like exactly Katie who famously like took a stance against PJs, which they even they they bring this out. They bring out this clip She's like, um, I'm gonna fly with like the rest of humanity. Please, thank you. And now she's like, Oh, that's right. You never flown one before. Yeah.

She's like, I used to think law, law is just some ratchet little gold dicker always flying around on her private jet here and there. But a month ago or two, I took a trip on the private jet. And that's next level. I'm like, oh, so you still don't regret calling her a whore? You're just like, I love the cat. At least she's not faking it. You know what I mean?

I thought she was going to be like, I used to call her a ratchet little whore, but now I really see she loves Randall. And this is nice to be friends with her. But she's like, I called her a ratchet whore, but now I can see why she's a ratchet whore. The private jet is amazing. She's like, I'm one too, it turns out,

because Lala just threw a private jet at me and I've totally changed my tune. I'm a wretched or the kind that doesn't ever get there for Johnny Touch ever, Tom, please, one thing. So now we get, we move on to our next therapy session, which is Brittany and Jackson therapy and Jackson walks in and he's already doing his like nice Jack's spiel to his therapist who I think has like not moved from her chair since last season.

He's like, this is Brittany, my fiance. You're just like, we're just a cute little couple that watches friends. I don't we cute, you know, like, yeah, we're fiance now. We are size now. We are beyond size now. She's like, oh, Fiance, come again. And they're sitting in front of a window unit, which is perfect for considering that their wedding party is going to be in front of the outside air conditioning unit. Yeah, that window unit, God, the producer producers must've been mad because it was so loud and they were trying to

Try not that audio the entire time and they just could not Because even the even the window unit had good sense like let's just ran out these fuckers because they're gonna They will make our our boss look bad right now Well, these two are a mess already. She's just like playing with her ring fear. Is he there? He all say he all say she's, I've never been to therapy before. So I'm scared. And the lady is like, why are you scared? She goes, I don't know what goes on in here.

This feels more like the end of the eighth right. Yeah, yeah. And I'm not comfortable with that. You live with a man who keeps the door open while he shits. Okay. I think he'll be fine going into the unknown at this point. Yeah, exactly. You shouted, I mean, guys, should the entire neighborhood. So I think tell us, you know, going to therapy won't be so bad. So, Jack's being the, being

the best therapist in the room, Jack's is like, so we've made some big changes. We made some big changes. Nam made some big changes. Namely, we just started smiling a lot and not talking about all the terrible things I did. And I think that solved it all. Yeah, just, you know, we're doing great. I mean, you know, just making the right choices, just making the right choices. My right, my right, just making the right choice. I've been making the right choices, right, right, right. Right for it. Yeah, because the therapist is looking at them like

Like what sort of yeah, it's like what sort of right choices are these? Yeah, she's like I can't get Botox right now because I'm pregnant So I'm sorry. I can't hide this face, but what the fuck? Yeah, by the way, can you get Botox when you're pregnant? I'm just making that up. I don't know if that's true I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I mean, I'm sure you can. I'd be Botoxing the baby, you know. Stop your kick in. There's a smooth as a baby's bottom is overrated. Botox that shit. My baby's bottom is smooth as a baby's bottom. That's not right. Seriously? That baby's bottom is baby bottoms AF.

So yeah, so yeah, Jackson, like you have middle-aged changes, made a lot of changes, right? And you know, like the moment, Britney would be like, well, actually, okay, so we're gonna add a fondue found to the engagement party. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

The changes, the changes. The changes. So just add something onto the engagement party every time that she has a reservation. Yeah, the therapist is like, so when you say you're making the right choices and you know what to do now, what does that mean exactly? And he goes, I know what to do. Like, stay home. I like to stay home now and I play games. Like, it's what I do now. It's what I do. I say home and I play games.

Yeah, no, you don't. A. And B. Why is that the right thing to do? Okay. Like, you don't have to, just to, like, not fuck somebody else, doesn't mean turning it to Katie, you know? Yeah, exactly. He's like, my favorite game.

Let's sex people off of Tinder until they realize it's all a joke, right? Break game, break game. So then, um, she's like, so you're spending time together, I guess, but you know, I know about last summer because we talked about that. And that stuff still needs to be healed. Do you talk about that? And he's like, no, I don't want you. No, I don't want you.

No, no, no. No, no, no. So what we have to, I don't want you. He's so fucking nice about, he's like, I mean, you know, we've dealt with it and we kind of put that to bed right honey Right, right? You put it to bed. We put it to bed. Right. We don't talk about that anymore. Honey. I'm not mad. I'm not mad I'm not tense at all about it. I'm not chance. I'm not tense at all. I'm just just saying guys to the best I'm so aggressive. He's sweating his veins are propping out of his head. His people don't look right like normal of course so then

therapists is basically doing had his people don't look right like normal of course. So then there are pieces of basic shit. Yeah, but she's not they only go to her once a season on camera, you know, so it's like what can she do? Yeah, so she's like, um, so Jack's I understand what you're saying, but you're also basically telling her to shut up. And since she's a plea people, please are she says, sure, and he's like, yeah, I know isn't great. I love doing it Why the fuck do you think I'm marrying her? Someone on Facebook pointed out that the how to train your dragon thing pop down right under jacks again Which is just perfect. Yeah, it's great. I love one bravo trills its own stars

Yeah, how to train your dragon just let them do whatever you they want to but then tell all your friends I've changed because you went to therapy one time. That's how. So she's like, well, he gets tens of it's brought up and he's like, I'm gonna get to hands. Yeah, you said that. And so it's like, well, I just want to make sure if bad things go on between us, it wouldn't happen again. Because some days I have resentment. I can't help it. The therapist is like, yeah, I understand it's not fun to talk about, but it has to be healed. Jack's why are you rolling your eyes at me? I mean, what? I just don't understand.

I'm like, it's okay not to understand something, right? Yeah, it's like his way of trying to put it like like no, I'm being thoughtful and introspective by declaring that it's okay not to understand something. Okay, I mean, how do you think I got to school? Am I right, everyone? I don't think he did, actually. Yeah, but then yeah, he's trying to use therapy talk to get out of therapy, which is really funny.

Yeah, exactly. I mean, I don't understand how going back to that can make things any better, right? I think the best way to move forward is pretend like never happened and just sort of like hope it doesn't happen again And if it does happen again, I'll just never tell Brittany. Yeah, I'll just let's never tell Brittany Someone takes the voice recording of it on their iPhone Then I'll just storm out until she forgets me again, you know, yeah, and so and basically bring you like But how do I know you won't go back to those ways? He's like, I just know. I just know. And then the lady is like,

well, a couple of therapies about talking and being honest, okay guys. And he's like, just giving him like his eyes are flaring and he's like pissed off. I mean, that guy's terrible. Yeah, no, this is just astro. And I mean, the one thing that makes me happy

is knowing like that this season is a little dull But next season I feel like he will do something terrible and it's gonna be hilarious watching him dig his way out of it Yeah But you know, I'm not really rooting for them at this point So I don't care and that's starting to become my problem with this show I don't know who I was ever really rooting for, but we never root for anyone on this show, but it's hard when there's like, it feels almost like there's no side to take anymore, right? Like it, one of the great things, one of the fun things about this show is that I'd always be like, oh my god, fuck Stasi, I'm on Chino's side. I'm like,

Chino's kind of terrible. I'm on Stasi's side. Oh, no, I'm on Chris's side. No, I'm on Tom's side. Wait, no, no, I'm on Jackson. Like you, I'm on Tom's side. Wait, no, I'm on Jackson. Like you go, it's like the fun part is like Rico Shane from one person to the other and you're like, oh no, but this season there's like no sides really. It's kind of like everyone is sort of like on one sort of general side. And then there's like James.

And if anything, I feel like I'm oddly on James's side, which is, you know, sad. Well, it's like any house watch shows, you're on the show, you're on the side if whoever's being bullied the most, you know, it's kind of natural. shows you're on the show you're on the side of whoever's being bullied the most You know it's kind of natural and James is getting it from every side and every side and yeah So let's guess you what James is doing James is listening to a song he recorded with Ariana And then we see Ariana in the soundboots recording the song and

We've done karaoke with Ariana and that bitch and sing I don't know what this is that they're doing in recording booth. But it's like he's telling her sing like a little, sing like a little anime. Right? I want no personality or vibrato. And she's like, and then we go to party. It's like what? You don't sing like that. I know.

I was like, because Ariana, I mean, Ronnie is right. I mean, she can really sing. I did not know about that about her. And so like, yeah, it was, she seemed a little bottled up, you know, so yeah. And then I was like, you've heard of Ariana Grande. You better watch out for Ariana Venti bitch. Yeah, I take comedy seriously.

Seriously. Seriously comedy right there. Seriously XM comedy. I'm not even smiling in my own joke But I know it's hysterical so you better smile at it. Ariana that to be it. Thank you James is like well that's that's bangin that's fire How fire fire It's like well, I'm trying to find out how to avoid future flight to mom

You know because just saying fuck you fuck you fuck fuck you, doesn't seem to be going well, mate. Yeah. So, yeah, I was talking about, oh, sorry. I just basically just gonna talk over there. You know, why not? No, no, I was done. And then we were like, yeah, he's really making a change. Like, he goes to the gym now. And golf and golf.

I picked up golf again. And Ariana's like, yeah, you don't have to turn server and then become 65 years old dude. You can do other things. So, so Jacqueline shows up at the door and Ariana just like turns into a cloud of dust. She's like, bye. You know, she's like, I'm not gonna be around this crazy bitch.

Yeah, and his mom comes in with a giant Louis. Fuck that lady. Oh, I didn't even notice that. Oh, yeah. I'm running from her son every two days and then coming in with a gigantic Louis Vuitton and dropping it on his countertop. I didn't even notice that. That makes me so angry. Okay. So, so she sits down and seems like, so I've been going to therapy and I think that's I think some boundaries would be a good thing She's like, yeah, sure absolutely. Oh, yeah, he's like, okay first boundary you can't talk about dad She's like, I won't I absolutely won't and you can't call me when he doesn't send you money. She's like, okay, you know what? Stop right there He doesn't send me money ever, okay

There. He doesn't send me money ever. Okay, he's the one who left me with my three children. I'm a fucking nothing. He got his own apartment, it is thing with scuba diving, when sailing, had a crab salad once, not cool. I'm like bitch, you just said you weren't gonna talk about the dad to your son and look what you're doing. And she's raging, she's so Kristen,

it's so creepy how Kristen she's in Yeah, she's like and I he left me Eyes are tearing up and she's raging. Oh my god. Yeah This is like there's no hope for someone like this. I don't think she's too far gone Did I ever get to use our AMC movie past no? Did I ever get to use our AMC movie pass? No, she because he divorced me and took it and used up all them Did I ever get to finish my subway card? No, he still has it with three slots open on it that I could have used Yeah, and he's like that's putting me in the middle. Do you not see that? She's like, oh, okay, so create a boundary? Okay, right done second next

He's like, well second if I'm financially helping anyone. I'd like to see where that money's going and she's like Mom I sent you money every two days. I sent you like $200 every two or three days and she goes every two days. I sent you like $200 every two or three days and she goes every three days. James, he's like, do you want to see my pay pal bitch? Like, it's all with a Utah. You know what I do with that money? I've got Dylan. I've got how I've got Harry. I got Poe Ballet. Mom, that's Powerball. Whatever. I've got scratch off tickets. He's like, Mother, scratch off tickets. And she's like, uh, scratch you.

And also, you're not taking care of his brothers. He's taking care of his brothers. So you're double dipping for the brothers now. And so she's like, but I was, I a shitty mother. I sent you to a 50,000 pound a year school. Great vacations. Burberry, Louie, Ralph, Gucci, Louie, I've sent you to a 50,000 pound a year school great vacations Burberry Louie

Ralph Gucci Louis Lambert. This is bullshit You took your first steps in a fucking Tiffany's that means that you were spending all of his fucking money all your family's money at Tiffany's you asshole Yeah, like that is actually like, and I like that that's an example of her being like a great, like a great mother is that he like took his first steps in Tiffany's, how was that evidence of you being a great mom? Like, oh, like, is he there for more refined? Is he more educated because of that?

No, he's actually more in debt because of that. It should be you took his first steps in a bowling alley or something. I don't care, but not Tiffany's, okay, not Tiffany's. But I did really appreciate that the more she started to yell, the more her voice started to turn to fran dressers. Did you notice that? Like, whatever carefully cultivated accent she tried to develop

in London, like just went out the window because she's like, I'm not gonna tell you to kiss my ass. I'm telling you to say thank you mom, okay. You did something for me. I'm not gonna tell you to kiss my ass. I'm telling you to say thank you, mom, okay? You did something from him, not a total bitch. Like where did this voice come from? I missed a chef, man. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Sick hair about you. And the mom's like, oh yeah. Well, I feel like a child right now, like a child. And he's like, well, I feel like a child.

And I am the child. And you need to remember that second. But. But. And he goes, he goes, and then he goes, you know, well, when you broke up with dad, I was in heaven. And she goes, oh, and I wasn't. I'm like, what sort of monster are you?

Your kid is hurting. Like, you may have been going through hell when you went up, when you broke up with your husband, but you know what, you should be more concerned about your kid going through hell. And the fact that you would say, but I wasn't, like, fuck you bitch, it's time for you to take, there's one way to get, just shut up, Mountain.

Okay. You get rid of both your parents. I'm sorry to say that, but you need to listen to Dr. Laura, okay? And get rid of both of those toxic people. Yeah, honestly, James, like, please, like, send them off, live your life, do your thing, let your mom drive Uber. Like we all done, well, not all of us, but like, you know, I always like to say, I used to drive Uber because sometimes there are ways to make the ends meet, okay? And you can just sell

that damn Louis Vuitton bag which looks stupid anyway and drive your car around and earn some money and like don't rely on your kid who should be using that money right now on what anyone else's age would be using on cocaine and shlits. Yeah, get the kids some cocaine and hookers for Christ's sake. I know. Let me want to have his father's life for a little while at least. me over Kellisoning there looking so terrified. She's like, I want to go to my multiplication tables. I know she's like, Oh,

my God, I actually want to watch Winnie Pooh for the first time ever. I know just like, please let me go to the Winnie Pooh movie. Please, please, I don't even want the ice cream anymore. Geez. So, Jackson Brittney, he's like, what are you doing? I don't even know where you're going. And she's packing. She's like, we're going to South Vane or something like that.

I don't know words. If the end of the seventh, so vain. Idiot. So he's like, yeah, well, we're going to have a guys nine. She's like, oh, you can't let the girls do their thing for one time. You guys got to do your thing too. What's talking about? Like, it's not a competition. I'm on your side, Brittany, but who cares? OK.

And he's like, yeah, I guess they better cancel the strippers. But of course, you know, he'll keep the dildos. We go, boy. She was like, oh, Jay, Jay, Jay, and his eyes were like, yeah, there were actual real strippers that I heard. But yeah. So then we go to Peter at the restaurant and he's doing his normal Peter thing where

he just is saying someone's name. He's like, ladies. I've never noticed that's Peter, but now that I see it, it's all I can see. Everything starts out with him going Lisa ladies stop letting Peter, Peter pumpkin Eta. I say pumpkin Eta because it's the strike of midnight. So, so yeah, so Lisa and Peter talking, Elisa goes, gets her table in the garden and who should show up. But Jacqueline. Oh my God. Yeah. Jacqueline. So Jacqueline is not going to get, she has been drawn, she's, a boundary has been drawn for Jacqueline. So she's not going to get a job. She's just going to make

someone else in her family supporter now. Yeah. So she's trying to guilt Lisa first she was so I saw James today and as hoping he'd be working here again, and Lisa's like, nice try bitch. Get out. Get out right now. Wait, wait, wait, I've got something else. Lisa, I got another proposition for you Lisa. Yeah, I like when she comes to double kiss Lisa and Lisa's just like, yes, Jacqueline, you know, and she's like, you look beautiful. Lisa is it's the lighting I want everyone to look beautiful in this place That's why I've ordered a click light to come in to put behind that tree for next time you come in Jacqueline Sorry, it hasn't arrived yet

Jacqueline's like well, you know, I just thought that maybe my kid Harry could work here Maybe he could work here because he just got out of college that would be great Monster why can't your fucking kid get a bus and job? could work here, maybe he could work here, because he just got out of college. That would be great. Monster, why can't your fucking kid get a bus and job anywhere else? Busing is like the lowest rung. You know, you can work your way up busing anywhere, but you have to go call in another favor to someone who barely knows you. That's so sad.

Yeah, and I also did not like that, Jackson said that James had a lot of anger that he has to come to terms with regarding like her and her ex. I'm like, he does, but don't make it sound like, oh, this is just all in James. You have a lot of shit you have to deal with because we just saw that scene, okay? So don't make it seem like your son is the one who's processing and you're the mature one here. You are the disaster, you're a lady.

You know what she reminds me of? She reminds me of like, like during every season of town, Naby, that would be like, midway through this season, that be someone from like the town, who would come up and like, like, belabor someone with some annoying thing, like, I beg of you, please, could you look after my son?

He is doing so well, and I'm afraid I cannot, I cannot pay for him any further because I have the consumption. And then you're like, oh, this fucking storyline with this person from the town and their kid and you know There's always a storyline like that. How was that? I thought your dad was slayed or whatever Down there. Yeah, like remember there's always like there's always some town person on down that you comes around and makes things annoying

You know, that's what she is and she really does look like a town person the mom. She really is like a down that She really is a fucking town. like a town person. The mom does. She really is like a down that. She's a person. She really is a fucking town. She has town person face. Yeah. She's like that storyline where like Edith, like was hiding a baby in the in the town and then there was like the suspicious wife and the farmer and everything and you know, the whole thing. Yeah.

She's the lady in the town who's like, oh, penance for your pot and stuff. I was like one tooth and like, you know, she's gonna rob you by the end in the town who's like, Oh, penance for your potentown. I was like, one tooth and like, you know, she's gonna rob you by the end of the day, you know. Yeah, she's the lady in town who's like, I saw Mr. Bates going to London and I followed him there and this is what I found out. It's like, shut up.

We don't even care about Mr. Bates and the fact that you're blackmailing him makes you even worse. Yeah, selling out Mr. Bates town person face. God, we really hate this woman. She is a, she is a Mr. Bates blackmailer job for horrible human being this woman. She's garbage. Okay, James cut her off. Yeah.

So she's Vanderpump's like, James has been a major pain in the ass to me, but I'm not sure if I want the same experience with Harry, but if his brother is working too, maybe he won't have to bear the sole responsibility for fine. No, you're enabling again. Cut them the fuck off. Okay, cut them off. You shouldn't be helping someone else get enough money to support this bitch.

Tell this bitch to get a job. Tell her you'll give her a job if she shows up at five in the morning for a month and does dishes every day and he does that you'll consider giving Harriet job and if he sticks with it for a month and she's so working there then you'll consider giving fucking James the job after he stayed sober for three months okay do I need to drive to your house in a white van to give you any more tough love okay yeah exactly let's rename her O'Brien and sticker in her in the in the basement of Sir and get a little. Okay, no, she's a Brian was too crafty.

No, because I enjoy it, O'Brien. Okay, O'Brien, I was like, what's she up to? Oh, she put some soup on the floor. She's up to bad things. But like town person, I'm like, get out of my abbie. And it worked when Mrs. O'Brien put that soap on the floor. This is not crazy. That what a wacky show. What hygiene. What baby-killing hygiene. They have on that, Mabbie. That's soap on the floor. Heavens. Yeah. No, you need, we have have a this. How about Jack then looks into a site that really would both reflect who she is and what she should be doing with her life, monster.com. Okay, how about she goes there? Okay, so PJ time, Valo's last on the peach.

And she's like, sap bitches, we ready, we got some dumb on the plane. And she's like, you know, Randall's paying for the plane because that's what he does for the baby, which is gross. And I really like the area on a spilled champagne all over the cloth seats. Yeah, I'm so excited for that. Yeah, I appreciate that too.

And I appreciate that Kristen forgot her purse. She actually left her bag behind. And so they had, like she, Stasi and Katie were carpooling, which is like, hello, Uber X. And so then they had to like wait for Chris and to turn around and get her bag. And I was like, oh, I love this. Why were there not cameras filming this? Because this is like, like, I could have watched an entire episode of this saga. Yeah, this should have been an entire episode.

It would have been better than what we got, honestly. So that Lala gives us a moment of Lala truth time. She's like, if Brandon was out of the pick, I'd still be flying private, just with a different guy. I'm just kidding. I'm not kidding. I'm not a little bit brief. I see. Now that's just how Lala I like refreshing on the state. Yeah. So then we get this first drama. And Kristen's like, Stasi literally goes out of her way to be a dick to me. You know what? I am who I am. Okay. That's gonna finish.

Yeah, I hate when people say that. They just fuck you over and get it again. They're like, oh, I am who I am. It's just why you're not invited anywhere, Hooker. Okay. Yeah, I also don't like when people say that regarding being on time, okay? Like for sure, like, you know, being like one or two minutes late, fun. But like, if you're consistently the person who's like 20 to 30 minutes late,

and then you're like, that's just who I am. That's not cool. And like you said, enjoy not being invited to places. Yeah. And Stasi will not let her forget it, of course. And then Bala tells the pie that I'm popping their page at cherries, which is just really gross. And then Brittney's like, my stomach is literally my asshole right now. And I'm like, this just Brittney know where her stomach is because it's really not that far from your asshole. So should it be out of your ass? I don're even understood what was happening. I think Brittany thought that they were at Universal Studios going on a ride and they were like,

I love this. This is when we go into Star Wars, right? It's a baby, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. If the end of the seventh play, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So blah, blah, they fly on the plane. And, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm gonna stand up. No, I'm gonna sit down. Oh my god. Yeah, and she's like, um, why haven't I ever done this before? Because you're poor, bitch. That's why. Like we're all choosing to just lead a life without private jets. Yeah. Yeah, we all just like, she just turned down so many of them.

Yeah. Sorry, Patrick. It's not able to bring one for you. Yeah, she's like, this has spent the best 25 minutes of my life. Okay. Like it took me longer Okay. It took me longer, it took me longer to wait for Kristen than it did to fly the soul. We could have flown to solving and back in the time that we've been recapping the show by the way, in the peach. I know. So yeah. So James and Harry show up at Sur because it's gonna be Harry's big interview and

Jack's like hey, what's going on? So we're gonna have a guys night tonight and you're not invited how about that? And you're like oh All right, I'll just stay with that line that you're chopping very sadly because I'm a little boy little boy So then oh, don't worry James. You'll be there when it all falls apart to laugh and drag jacks through the fucking mud And just keep your head up kid. Yeah, exactly So then we go back to the girls there. They're now in the van heading to the that either hotel and everything and Kristen's like this trip is going to be badass Because we're in California and you can see how puzzled briny was she's like how are we in

California? We're in an airplane. Then why am I drinking butter beer? She's still in Harry Potter. Harry, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So, um, yeah, so now we're just going to all pretend that Christian has anxiety about being away from home. This show, it's like, what do you Bethany Frankl?

You can't just make up new diseases for yourself every season. Okay, you'll want to foster. Yeah, so Stasi just starts yelling at Kristen for being late, which I just love a good old Stasi Kristen fight. And Kristen's like, I'm late a lot. I just am shoulder roll, shoulder roll, shoulder roll. You know, I'm a lot, yeah.

I'm like, okay, LeCos, calm down, okay. Calm down, drag queen. So then, yeah, yeah, Stasi is like, I literally spent more time waiting on the sidewalk. This morning that I did on the PJ, which I actually believe 100%. I just wish there had been a camera just stand just stossy on the sidewalk. The one hand on her hip, like probably oversized sunglasses, poofy, a poofy top,

just like flapping in the wind, just looking left and right down. I'm just gonna imagine she's on like spaulding Avenue or something like that, just staring, waiting, being pissed. And, you know, it's kind of disappointing with this show because they, so much of it is set up, and I know that every show, every reality show is so set up, and I don't like going down the path of like, that's a sub-fank, because of course it is, it's set up.

But they need to have cameras there before the set, like while everybody's going to the set up, seeing because that's when everything good happens, and it happens on housewives all the time where they miss this good shit Like how hard is it to get a fucking handy camp if you don't well if you don't want to spend the money then put people on the Colton camp You know or whatever like the handheld phone camp. Yeah, the airplane camp for the real housewives trips Whatever I don't care. Yeah, but make enough also and also stossies neighbors

You got help to it takes a village. Okay, if you see her standing out there Looking bored and annoyed, just start filming with your phones. Okay, just spy on her and just hand it over to Bravo because we need it. Yeah, it takes a village to shame a Christian, guys. Okay. Let's, this is a group effort, okay?

You know, like, as long as we're living in a surveillance state, a modern surveillance state, we might as well use it for own entertainment. There's no escaping it, okay? You got to ring camera. I'm gonna do a show for you. Like, let's take the best, let's take the best of surveillance state and make it work in our favor. Oh, how sad that we're like having an innovative idea. Like, we're gonna take this surveillance state and make it entertaining and we're gonna have it star. Stasi! So they get to the hotel and everyone is agreed to share rooms, but no one will share with Sina

I mean people will share with Kristen before they share with Sina, which is really sad and That's my favorite young adult book. No one will share with Sina. No one shares with Sina I'm a rena No, but she's she know I'm a Queen I know I want to live on the thing Like wow I'm Yeah, it just sounds like she's being held under water and like bubbles are coming out.

I mean, I'm being like, I already live alone in my room. I'm like, I don't want to be alone in a room. I just want to be with like my friend. Like, oh, yeah. So I want to, now the rest of us would die for a room alone, you know? Yeah, I'm like, that's fantastic. But, you know, she's being left out again.

And of course, she is, because we see everybody go to their rooms and they're like yeah So she's going to her and she goes cow cow, and then on top of that she doesn't even have a queen bed She's in a she's in her double room and just her yeah Poor scene and her little frog. I guess it's just me again frog. Frogs like actually I want to talk to you about that. I, um, I think it's time we go our separate ways. Yeah, this frog leaves her.

He's like, uh, this is a bad time to ask if I could say with Ariana, ribbit. Ribbit. Just wasn't a joking ribbit. Like maybe it's like he's ribbit. So Katie and Kristen go to their room and everyone's getting in their room basically. But Katie and Kristen are in their room and Kristen's like, I'm sorry, but Stasi like screamed at me in front of your car and your car. Back with four people.

Like, and I'm sorry I left my personal before like the dogs were there My boyfriend was asleep and I had to make sure there were puppy beds in the forest my dogs so pee Train your dogs first of all. Yeah, train your carter and train your dogs We'll strong with the people on this show this story didn't that that's excused not add up. Okay Okay, so how about this put the doggy bed things out that I before, maybe, or wake up like five minutes earlier, or even if you do all that stuff, how do you forget your purse? I don't know, I just feel like there's like a lot of, or just don't do any of it.

Just get your purse and go. And if the dog's pee, then that's cardable, clean it up. Yeah. I think you would hope. I think 80, 80 is like, I think you would hope, you know, and then Katie, what's his idea? Well, you would think that if Carter, if your girlfriend is going out of town, then your boyfriend would like, help you. But like, I see, don't do that. I'm like, okay, okay, street, Lala, step back, Katie. I know, Katie. So,, meanwhile back over at Sir, it's time for Harry's big interview. And so Peter's sitting at table with James and, uh, and Harry and then Guillermo comes by and James tells us like,

Guillermo's like a second father to me. Third father, after Ken, sorry, sorry, sorry Ken, sorry Ken. He's like a third father and he means so much to me. He means so much. That's why I've given him $700 for this job interview Yeah, so Gamer's Gamer is like so high. He's like, hey, okay, so you know, it's funny because like like when When James first came to interview, he was like I want to be a DJ like we don't have a DJ But you can start as a bus boy and it's funny because like I don't need a busboy Okay, I need a DJ, huh? Hey James. Hey James. I need a DJ. You know why cuz you can't fucking it up James That's why he keeps fucking get up your brother. What a fuck up, huh? Okay, we're gonna let you train as a busboy But I need to go now because I gotta find a DJ so thanks a lot fuck up James

Fuck up James and James like James just like drops his head on the table and I first I thought he was like oh god I'll never let me live it down, but he starts to cry I have James okay. I know life is getting hard But you've got to stop sobbing every five minutes. You've got to stop. Okay. You're not that's not how to get a bus boy job He's like every day I cry I cry I don't know what it is is it is it just because I just go home and listen to Rekhael talk about multiplication table It's like I get it two times eight is sixteen. I get it already. I get it. Yeah, it's it's Rekhael It's a combination of being married to a

Bugs apper and a bug zapper and or dating a bug zapper and your mother being a horrible trash human being. And then add on top of that like serious withdrawals. And yeah, I would be crying every day too. So I take it back. But still, butch it up, dude, you're at work. So then the brother's hired and he's like, you're doing all right, man.

Everyone makes a mistakes, brother. You're working hard and it will be okay. You need a little tough love sometimes. Put a little love in your heart, and just like the people said, poorly. I prefer the onion Linux version with our green. Put a little love in your heart.

The brothers, sweet in their relationships sweet and they hug. I love you brother and he's like I love you brother. Now I need them to start doing some Menendez planning. Okay, you're close enough to get the shit together boys. I just I do I can't help it. I do feel bad for James. He says some of the most viral things he acts in the most vile ways. But we see where it's coming from. And like, I'm just enroding that he can break this cycle because it's like, he was raised

by a wretch. And like, it's like, he, I mean, gosh, I'm not even going to go into it because the nice thing about when he was, they broke his arm they would they made fun of him He was raised by righteous. I mean this guy has just been shat upon and I just like it doesn't excuse his terrible behavior But gosh, I do hope that he can turn a corner Yeah Me too. We'll see. I mean, we'll see I literally hope he knows how to walk around corners because if not like recal It will be very confused.

I know. He'll be the first person to bump into the wall. No. Raquel, this is how you do it. So meanwhile, I was trying to stop cutting corners because I kept hitting my head. Raquel, you're not supposed to physically cut corners. Does anybody have a saw Raquel? Does anybody have a saw? Raquel. So the girls are at a bar and they're going for these wine tastings and Chris is doing that like, oh, I'm an orange.

And it's my lips. Where's this guy an orange and her mask? Look here. Yeah. I don't know where she is. Yeah. And Britney's like, oh my God, I love all these buildings. They look like little

villages. These houses look like houses. This is crazy. Fairytale. Now, say what you will about this season and even this episode, band of emberles will always give us a hilarious moment that we were probably going to talk about. Like one of those things like, three years ago, like, remember with this time that Chris and did this, Chris, they're in like, they're waiting across the street and they're like in like a traffic island and there's like a little, like a little, like, lab, there's a bush right there. And Chris is like, oh, look, lavender. That smells so good.

I'm there like that. She starts to turn like, what is that? It's lavender. No, no, no. You guys, what if it's poison? Uh. Area is all like even children know not to eat unidentified plants, OK?

Yeah. Like a dog definitely 100% peed on that thing. Yeah, bring you like, Christian, what if you die in a couple of hours? That'd be a say, yeah, yeah. That would be so much of a retail. What is that, bars and? Hmm.

So then they go into the winery and Kristen walks right up to the bartender and she's like, is this the oven, or cause I just ate it. Hmm. Like the local Somalia slash botany expert. And this is what the saddest part of this is to me. These are all restaurant people.

And none of them know that it's rosemary. Rosemary is pretty identifiable. You fucking. I couldn't really, I actually couldn't really see it. So I didn't want to weigh in officially. He said, he said it's rosemary. So he said it was sage. Oh, whatever.

It saves. I mean, that's still pretty, that's a pretty standard herb to use, guys. That's for Poison Oak. That'd be hilarious. So yeah, so I just, I love that she was martian. I was like, what is this? I ate it. So then they're, they're chasing the wine and Chris is like downing it. She's babbling on and on and on. And she's like, I think welot is the basic bitch of wine. Ooh. Which is funny because it's like the Merlot

of the group just spoke. Yeah. No. Oh. James May Merlot. So yeah. So she's like, and I don't like dry reds where I'm like, oh.

So they're all like, oh my god, she's a disaster and she's just getting worse and worse and worse. Now they go to the next wine room and they're like walking, she like trips on the sidewalk and like, oh god, and so now they're at the next tasting room and we just hear she's your she anyway I like why it's just that my trainer doesn't want me to drink it uh narrative and the lady's like well what's your drink then she's like take on and and stress and things all my friends are basic bitches with their tata's and

sodas okay and then chris and start smelling so you know i was like that's Ronnie's dream it is you know here's why basic bitches like vodka soda. So because that's what Weight Watchers tell you tells you you can drink. They're clear. Okay. It's the lowest calorie thing you can drink. You can drink anything clear and not gain weight. Okay. Have I gained weight? Yes. It is not because of what I drink. And it's what I eat. Okay.

Okay. I would be 9,000 pounds if I drink beer. That is like drinking a sandwich. Janelle told me that Weight Watchers when I was 13. That's it Meanwhile I enjoy beer. There's my problem. You do, but you are also not a binge eater and like have an issue You know, but girls who are trying to stay stick figures they have like I said it's because that's what waitwatchers tell you if fight without We're about it. Okay, I will Okay, so that was pretty much it, right? So Kristen's smelling stossy, she's like,

my guy is also good. And so she's like, there are tail tail signs when crazy Kristen is coming out. And then she starts doing her list of things. And I'm like, she's wasted. Like that's your tail tail sign, okay? And she is currently wasted. So I think the tail tail sign that Crazy Kristen has arrived

is she's breathing. And that brings us to the end of another episode of Aguipoproos. So exciting. And the only thing to be more exciting is the fact that we'll be back tomorrow with the Real House, was a Beverly Hills

already cap season for me Errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr or another season of the victim fanfare prompt. And we are here for it. Yes, sir. Find out wherever you find your podcast. Thank you to TV Party. We love being with you guys. If you guys want to replay this, it is on Patreon. Sign up and you guys can stream that to your TVs. OK, it's going to be fine. And until then, we will talk to you next time.

Bye, everyone. you Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watcher Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey.