Watch What Crappens - PumpRules: Lake Have-a-seat

Episode Date: March 16, 2023

Vanderpump Rules centers around the lowest vibration girls trip of all time. For bonus episodes and video recaps, join Patreon at patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens Tour Dates: https://www.watchwh...atcrappens.com/2023-cheater-brand-tour/See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, Prime members, you can listen to watch what crap ends at free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. This episode is sponsored by Uber1. We've all used Uber for rides, and I love using UberEats for food delivery. Okay, hello. I mean, I kind of live off of it. But have you ever heard about Uber1? Uber1 is a membership that helps you save on Uber and UberEats. With an Uber-1 membership, you get exclusive member perks, like up to 10% off UberEats and a $0 delivery fee on eligible orders. It just makes sense. I'm always getting Uberes.
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Starting point is 00:01:27 Each finalist is driven by the same dream, to become music's next must listen. But to break through they'll have to dig deep, pushing their vocal, songwriting, and recording chops their absolute limits while keeping their feet and emotions firmly grounded. So who will break through? It's time to find out! Join Kelly, Sarah, and David on a musical journey unlike anything you've ever seen. This is Breakthrough. Listen on Audible or wherever you get your podcasts. Go to audible.com slash breakthrough. Follow along using hashtag BreakthroughXAudible. I'm Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, C Well, hello and welcome to watch what happens the podcast for all that crap we love to
Starting point is 00:02:27 talk about on your bros. I'm Ronnie. Hi everybody. Welcome to this show. I'm with Ben today. The goal just talented so far hasn't cheated Ben. Hello Ben. Not planning on it.
Starting point is 00:02:40 Hi Ronnie. How are you? Good. I'm glad to see you're still a good person in this timeline. I'm glad to see that too. I'm broadcasting back from my cloud. It's my big cloudy backdrop that I have these days. Well, everybody, welcome to the show today. Super crazy episode of Vanderpum. Wow. Super crazy episode of Vanderpump. Wow. You know, Andy Cohen was hyping it up because he was like, wow, this episode,
Starting point is 00:03:12 when you see it, it was not touched at all. This is the episode before the Scandum all broke and you can't wait for you to see it, but he lived up to it. I mean, I was kind of like, my mouth was dropped through most of this episode. My job, my job was, I should say. Were you shocked?
Starting point is 00:03:28 I was shocked. I was shocked. Yeah. I was not really shocked by it, but you know, it's sort of like I always say, like I'm right a lot of the times. Like in the future, I proved to be right because I'm just cynical and most people are terrible.
Starting point is 00:03:44 So if you, if you say every was terrible, you're to be right because I'm just cynical and most people are terrible. So if you say ever was terrible, you're gonna be right 80% of the time. I think it was one of those episodes. Oh, I was. Some stuff was said that wasn't necessarily true at that time, but then it was true in the future. Also, I have to warn people who are triggered. This is a very weird episode as far as my feelings go
Starting point is 00:04:02 because I'm prepared to show up to every episode just being like Tom Sandivall and Raquel need to just, you know, go over her left or whatever and they're gonna be wrong and every single thing that happens because obviously I've visited the future along with everybody in this audience and knows what's gonna happen. So I'm ready to just be pissed all the time with them, but I got a hand it took, you know, Katie and Lala who can still make me team anybody else's. It's mainly Lala's work. That is a talent. I'm going to say it's mainly Lala's work in this episode. I agree with you that this was this was a difficult episode for me. And this was the very first thing that I worried about.
Starting point is 00:04:43 Well, it wasn't the first thing I worried about, but it was a thing when the scandal all broke, this was the thing that I was thinking about, which was how do we as podcasters navigate this? Because the show is going to give us one narrative, but life outside the show gives us another, and how do we resolve the two? I don't really have a good answer for that,
Starting point is 00:05:02 because if I were watching the show without knowing what was going on, I would like, I have one reaction. But knowing what's going on, I have another, and they're both kind of in conflict with each other, and I've just decided that's fine because that is ultimately what Van and Pomp Roole's is all about. It's sort of about terrible people, doing terrible things to each other, and it's not that there's someone that you root for It's just there are people that you root against and you just kind of try to resolve it any given moment someone is the worst person in a conversation and but it was it was crazy and when you talk about Ronnie about you being right about things I'm very frequently 100% wrong someone todayaged us because on Reddit,
Starting point is 00:05:47 apparently we foreshadowed this whole thing in 2017. And I am on record in 2017 saying that Tom would never cheat on Ariana because he just seems head over heels and love with her. So, you know, my track record remains undiminished, 100% wrong, 100% at the time. Well, I think that it's not, I think it's better in life to have your attitude. I think it's better to have belief in people, you know? It's better to have hope than not to have hope.
Starting point is 00:06:19 You know, my hope is dead and I'm fine with it. I've gotten used to that, I've accepted it, I've learned to love it. But, you know, I think if I had a choice, of course I would choose hope. You know, I just, it just doesn't enter my brain often as far as other people go. So before we get into this,
Starting point is 00:06:36 oh, also, last week we were talking about the psychology of all of this, Rikkel stuff. Like what made Rikkel like, is she, was she evil the whole time? The psychology of like how did she get to that point? I think we see a lot of it in today's episode. So I really cannot wait to get into it. And we will. But this is a great reference on demand episodes. So if you want to see our beautiful big faces come to watch whatcraftmins.com. You'll find our Patreon links. It's one of our Patreon tiers.
Starting point is 00:07:06 So hi everybody out there. Also, we are still touring. We tour through June. The rest of this month is nuts. We start again next week, two weekends in a row. Next week, we start in Denver. Then we're going to Salt Lake City, then Seattle, then San Francisco.
Starting point is 00:07:21 And that's just this month. So come home. Go to watchocrap watch what crap and get your links, your ticket links. Okay, so let's get into this episode bin. And I just, I'm sorry, there's a lot of preamble with this podcast, but I know that people's emotions are extremely high. And I would just like to put the disclaimer, I am recapping this episode, not this month. You know what I mean? It's like, thank you for saying that.
Starting point is 00:07:49 Yeah, we're recapping the show, and we all know about the stuff that happened beyond the show, but I'm not going to lie. There were moments where I had sympathy for Raquel in this show, but I also know that she's also kind of a monster too outside of the show, but I also know that she's also kind of a monster too outside of the show, and I do not approve or condone anything that she and Tom send her did. I'd say fuck them, fuck them.
Starting point is 00:08:13 I mean, there was actually something sort of like, that was sort of the fun of this in a weird way, is that I'd have sympathy for her. And then the fact that I had sympathy, I'd be like, oh, I have sympathy for Raquel. Wow, she really is a monster. I'm like, I feel like bad. And you regret it and start freaking out that you're feeling anything for Raquel. Wow, she really is a monster. Because I'm like really bad. And you regret it and like start freaking out that you're feeling anything for this girl. You know, it was like terrible.
Starting point is 00:08:30 And I was like, what are you doing? And then I felt guilty for giving someone the benefit. I mean, I almost typed, okay, I almost typed you the actual text message, hashtag team Raquel three times while I was watching this. And I was like, don't even text bend that. Don't put it on the record. Don't put it on the record. Don't put it on the record.
Starting point is 00:08:47 I'm not saying this is the record, right? Don't give him written evidence. Yeah, but you know, I had to last night to think about that. Well, but that and the fact is like this, we are giving like kind of a pre-apology, but actually it's not an apology. I'm just saying don't get your panties in your twist because I'm going with what I think. Yeah, that's it. I don't care
Starting point is 00:09:05 We have to believe in what we yeah, this is on what we reacted to when we watch it everyone It's not being mad at us. No, but I think I'm I sense it already I'm like I know already No, no because I think what was so hard for this episode was I would see Lala really going hard at I would see Lala really going hard at Raquel, hypocritically in my mind, and Raquel basically hitting back and saying, you're a mistress and you're like, yeah, Raquel, tell Lala, but then you're like, wait, but you were actively being a mistress right now.
Starting point is 00:09:37 Like that's what's crazy, although then another thing that someone sent us or someone alluded to on another pot, like there's a girl who was Rekel's former confidant who said Jamie all over Jamie all over. I was just going to give the what the basically what I heard was that Jamie all over said that Rekel the maybe the affair started that night I guys night who knows but That's what I was bringing up to that. I was just assumed to this clip So it's her ex-friend because I guess you dumped for cal after all of this and another one of her cal's friends
Starting point is 00:10:13 Who's a life coach? So I mean put but as much stock and that as you will as this testimony But as much stock in this testimony as you will Because also like you like your life coach, but then you're going to talk shit publicly about your ex-best friend. Like that seems, I know that life coaches aren't therapists, but that seems shady, you know what I mean? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:34 So they're talking about how he, Rikkel called him all upset crying after this Vegas thing, and then they went to the, you know, this boy's night thing, and that's where they think this, um, a fair start it because they were talking really close, like to the point where this Jamie all over chick was taking video of it, and they were doing funny voiceovers of Tom and Raquel talking on the curb, like they were sitting on the curb. And then she watched it later and was like,
Starting point is 00:10:57 I'm not going to post this because it's like that's respectful to Raquel. I mean, uh, to Arianna, I see even see them being this close. So, you know, it's like a friend gossip podcast. So who knows how much stock we could add to that? The very interesting podcast. So go check it out. Yeah. And even if that is true, if this is true, this is the origin of that affair, then that's also bullshit to be yelling at Lala the night before about Lala being a mistress and then starting something up with Tom the next night. I mean, either way. Well, just like, you know, okay, we'll get terrible humans, you know? Yes, but like, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:11:30 Yes. Okay, so let's get started with that. Let me get started. Girls Trip, okay. Now I told you another prediction that of course came true is Katie's gonna have the most boring, worst, most depressing depressing fucking crying filled laymest fight filled girl strip of all time. Why anybody would go on a girl strip hosted
Starting point is 00:11:53 by that drip is beyond me, but you guys didn't. So I hope you're enjoying yourself. Okay. Tom just brought me a coffee. I'm very happy. See that is a real man right there. That is not Tom's endeval. Thank you, Dolores. Okay, so Vegas. We're in Vegas and there's this song that's just kind of throwing a lot of stuff at the wall. Party hard, let loose, dressed up. We're the fly, fly it's in the room, fly it's in the room, and then it's like Katie. Yeah, it was like some weird LMFAO revival music It's like is this what red food is up to these days just doing like working with Trixi Monaco to like divide tracks for Vannaporn brules Red Boo So they're doing this you can tell it's not the days of like silent pictures because you know how they would have the musicians like The day is a silent pictures, you know? The paper there, the silent paper, those days is long gone boys.
Starting point is 00:12:48 Now you got to have a voice to make it in this business because they face anymore. Because they would play the piano in front of the silent picture. So they would score it as the movie was playing, you know, and they would just face it off. Whatever was happening on the screen. And if that was the case, the music would just be like, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, be the most depressing ballad of all time. We'll just be, it'll be a very slow version of Chopsticks. Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun She's an elevator, but it's like really hard to get on my things. See other girls leave the elevator and she's like stuck in there. And she tells us, I haven't done many girls in my lifetime,
Starting point is 00:13:52 but I'm having the best time. Rick Cal is now wild and free and single and fun. And I'm going to focus more on myself. Every time she makes these statements, you know, three weeks ago, it's like, it's like a proclamation of independence. And now it's like, oh, it's a proclamation of selfishness, right? Because it's like, yeah, you're focusing a little bit too much on yourself and no one
Starting point is 00:14:16 else right now. So she's, Rick Hell has like a whole thing of leftovers from, I guess, the Vanderpump, a potry restaurant. So she's asking Wala for like a whole thing of leftovers from, I guess, the Vanderpump Aapari restaurant. So she's asking Lala for like a fork and knife so she can microwave it. And Lala is just like, God bless this mess. You know, the sloppiness of Ritell tonight made me go, I don't know if I would trust you after one too many drinks. So this is like Lala's new thing, which is I'm very happy
Starting point is 00:14:45 she's sober. I think it's wonderful. I think it's wonderful. She's in recovery, but she's doing that thing where now she's going to become like an alcohol counselor for anyone around her who gets drunk. Well, also, who's Lala to talk about going after other people's man? Also, this girl did not go after your man. You don't get... a lot less that friend that whenever you go out, she picks the hottest person. She's like, that's my man. And then suddenly,
Starting point is 00:15:10 like you're going to get some kind of code if anybody else likes that guy, you don't get him. He didn't even fucking remember you. So I don't know how you twisted this in your mind that this is now your man, but she is pissed that he did not pick her, you know, and it's clear as day. Yes. So Katie is like, listen guys, I don't want to laugh at her because they're
Starting point is 00:15:29 all in bed, you know. Mm hmm. Uh, she's like, I don't want to laugh at her. And Mala's like, um, we're laughing with her. Okay. And Christina Kelly, who by the way, you know, nice to see Christina Kelly back because it's not fun only having one witch of we hoe. So even if there's a stand in non original-original witch of WeHo, she's still a witch and she's still from WeHo. But God, what a dick she is. I forgot what a asshole she is. But I really appreciate it. I mean, I really, I'm not necessarily on her side, but I like her bringing some of that classic season one and two nastiness to the show. You know, like, I do actually is doing her doing the right thing. She's doing, she's in her lane, you know,
Starting point is 00:16:08 she's on her lane, you know, and by the terrible, terrible, awful fucking lane. And I just, uh, you know, I really love watching this show and being so world up and screaming, you dick like I love it. So thanks. Yeah. giving me that back. Everyone's like in their lanes. I know this may be controversial to you, but I think Charlie's back in her lane. I think Charlie's first season, I loved her. And then their second season, I was like, oh, Charlie's not fulfilling her promise.
Starting point is 00:16:37 But now Charlie's back to just being a brat. And I'm like, Charlie's doing it for me. I'm loving Charlie, you know? This is Charlie's lane. Charlie is not main character energy. She's telling off the mean girls occasionally energy. Yeah, and then yeah, you know, going back to you know, a decent one, whatever the fuck she does, you know, yes, or fun is make a plan. So Christina's like, guys, she's that type of girl. She's like guys is Raquel. Okay. Yes, you know what you're on a fucking girls trip Christina, okay?
Starting point is 00:17:10 Get this stick out of your ass. You're supposed to be wasted and eating leftovers in bed The rest of you are the ones that have a problem here. Yeah, and she's like do you think that she made out with Oliver tonight and Lala's like I'm pretty sure that's the direction she was heading. Okay. So then Katie starts going, Mrs, I'm gonna make up with your man. Welcome to my world, which is. Yes, of course. Four shots. Totally the same thing. Rekel making out with some random waiter at a restaurant is totally the same as Rekel not doing anything with your fucking ex-husband who you left and are now having a divorce party to celebrate leaving. I can't with these people.
Starting point is 00:17:53 So Lala's like no, you're his deep irks then mind. And Katie's like yeah, but I'm seeing a lot of comparisons here. Guys a lot of comparisons. And Lala's like yeah, there are so Rikow comes in with food and they're all laughing with her Yes, they're all laughing with her and she's like you guys want any food This is why they hate her because she actually has the balls to Eat I don't want to say balls that almost gives her too much credit But she's like actually brought just brought carbs into their world. They're like, how dare her? How dare her?
Starting point is 00:18:27 We're on television. So she's like, I microwave this and then like, you microwave the bread. She's, yeah, and as long as it's not aluminum because Katie told me I shouldn't put aluminum in the microwave and then I did it. Everyone's staring at her like, how many years did you go not knowing about that?
Starting point is 00:18:45 How have you lived, you know, how have you lived this long? So Katie is like, so rekeld, did you kiss the guy tonight? She said, yeah, I did. And she goes, who all of her? You guys, there was a whole fucking camera crew surrounding them. Don't pretend you were just standing there jealous. The Katie has a girl's trip. Lala is trying to get laid on camera. The only person with cameras on them is Raquel. I'm so sorry you didn't notice. So she's like, wait, you didn't see. And Katie's like, um, Lala was supposed to kiss him. Lala does. No, I was not. And Raquel's like, well, I thought so too. And Katie's like, Raquel, why are you like this? And Raquel's like, well, I thought so too. Okay, he's like, Rickah, why are you like this?
Starting point is 00:19:26 And Rickah was like, are you serious right now? Like, it was Lala's territory. And I wasn't like it was Lala's territory. And I wasn't allowed seriously. And Lala was like, no guys, I gave her the okay, okay. I just didn't know you were interested. It's like, and Christine is like, yeah, cause we heard like Lala talk about him.
Starting point is 00:19:47 So it was obvious like we're reading for Lala and Lala goes, yeah, cause that's my type of guy. So I think Katie tells us. What does that mean? By the way, that's my type of guy. If she's saying a black guy because in the, at the part at the next bar, she's like, oh my God, those are my types of guys.
Starting point is 00:20:07 It's like black guys, so everybody has to back away from every hot black guy that comes in. Not gonna happen, ma'am, okay? Get to the back of the line. A lot of us like hot black men. You don't get to corner the market on hot black guys in bars. Yeah. So Christina's like, yeah, she's like,
Starting point is 00:20:25 I didn't know you were interested, yeah. I didn't know you were interested. So yeah, so then Katie's like, I'm starting to see a pattern on Raquel. It seems like she's only interested in men that her friends are either married to or interested in and like that is like a big red flag for me. So I'm gonna give a point to Katie on that one.
Starting point is 00:20:44 I think that one, that came true, regardless of where I stand on how they act the rest of the episode, we'll give that one to Katie. I'll give Katie a future point, you know, post-scan devol, I'll give her a point, but right now I don't necessarily give her a point because I don't see it as her trying to steal men. I see it as her going for convenience. It's like whoever's hot and literally right there in front of her, which that's what I'm seeing so far because Oliver is not anybody's man.
Starting point is 00:21:13 So this is Katie playing into her convenient narrative just to villainize somebody because she has nothing else to do with her life. At this point, Rikkel has really done nothing to Katie, okay? Well, I mean, she did blatantly tell Katie that she wanted to make out with shorts, which, you know, it's just, I got it, it's like it.
Starting point is 00:21:33 Fair game to me. Yeah, I mean, it's funny because like a few weeks ago, we're like, it's fair game, but now I feel like my entire perspective has changed. It's like, I can't look at it necessarily with the same eyes I had before. But what I will say is, I think I'm getting the sense that Rikkel is
Starting point is 00:21:48 someone who just responds to male attention. So like if a guy shows interest in her, I think she's just like, you know, so that's also. She does. She also responds to female attention. I mean, look how she was beaming last week when, when Lala came over to her apartment, it was pretending to be so nice to her. And Raquel was just beaming like a little kid like, oh my god, Lala's here, she's being nice to me. I think she is just excited when she gets any attention. That's why you have to invite all the kids to the ice from social, not just the ones who are good at math. Yeah, that's true. This is the scar. So, this is basically all of kids, the ice cream social, not just the ones who are good at math. Yeah, that's true. This is the scar.
Starting point is 00:22:26 So basically all of this, you're right. Actually, in all of this scandal, nobody has gone back to blame the ice cream social b-otch in the first place. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crap and scum. If you're hiring, you know what it's like to deal with economic uncertainty, and now more than ever, it's really important to hire the right people faster and more efficiently because you got to keep the overall cost down.
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Starting point is 00:23:57 especially if they're from impossible foods. They taste like beef. Exactly. Impossible is making meat history this summer. Yeah, they are. Exactly. Impossible is making meat history this summer. Yeah, they are. Summer of Impossible. I am so excited to be spending time, cooking my summer foods, all that good stuff,
Starting point is 00:24:12 and guess what, we can use impossible sausages, impossible brats. I mean, it's gonna be a great summer for impossible foods. Impossible beef is made from plants and 19 grams of protein per serving, and it's better for the planet. And it's meat. Plant meat! Correct!
Starting point is 00:24:26 So if you're looking for something to grab for your grill, grab some impossible beef. Summer of Impossible. Start making meat history today, just head over to the meat aisle at your local grocery store, grab some impossible beef, or patties, and get grilling. So Lala, Lala's like, you know what? No, it's fine. I mean, you asked me. I punted him to you and I gave you my okay. I mean, which by the way, like you punted him as if like Oliver was going after Lala and then Lala said, no, no, go see my friend, Raquel. You never, there was no indication that all of you He's that next to Raquel you just happened to be on the other side of Raquel talking about your mom's story
Starting point is 00:25:09 I know you're talking about custody battles like yeah, yeah, I know he was so turned on about my legal issues But I decided to punt him to you Raquel Yeah, I actually in fact, I believe That Lala quote-unquote punted Oliver to Raquel just so she could have this moment where she said, I punted him to you. It was like a test. Like it was a, it was a girl code test. Like, hey, it's like even though I express interest
Starting point is 00:25:35 in this guy, will Raquel still go after him or will she be a girls girl and be like, no, I want Lala to have it. I actually think it was a test and Raquel failed it. Well, failed Lala's test, I should say. I think it's straight up. She's always hated Raquel. She still hates Raquel.
Starting point is 00:25:49 And she's going through the thing that the other castmates had when Lala came on the show. Do you remember when Lala came up? And she was really nothing like Raquel except young. She was young, you know? And so everybody else just hated her and was calling her a slut and this and that. And she had to work really hard to get in the good
Starting point is 00:26:07 Graces of everyone else and I think that Lala is now in that position. She's got a baby. She's got a divorce under her belt She's got three new faces and she's at that point where she's looking at this new young person coming in and Look Lala's the person on the show not getting chosen now. And I think that's rough, you know? She's having like a Jack's moment. A Jack's versus James is. She is. She is. So she says, I will say that you drinking,
Starting point is 00:26:33 I would never trust you around my man. Never. Which is, I mean, these days I would agree with that. I would totally agree with that. But it's one of those things where it's like, but in the context of this episode, but in the context of this episode, like in the vacuum of this episode, I'm like, he wasn't your man.
Starting point is 00:26:51 And she wasn't drunk and she didn't steal him. He didn't like you. He's just not that into you. Okay, bring some at the round to say good to say clear. Say it good, to say it clear. So, you have a lot to bring it up. It's just so hypocritical. I will say you drinking. I would never trust you around my man. Never. And then we get more music.
Starting point is 00:27:12 It's like, I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna. But never trust for a kill around Rand. But then Raquel turned around and she sort of like awkwardly stumbles her way through a clap back. Like actually a pretty good clap back, but pretty also evil one which is I mean like thank God
Starting point is 00:27:31 you don't have a man to like fuck around with. I'd be like oh which is like Christine is like oh my god, Brac! Raquel! Raquel! Admittedly, it did reveal some aspects of Raquel. That foreshadowed a lot of things, so, you know, I'm not gonna- I don't think so. Again, I'm so sorry, because I know that people are just melting down that I'm sticking up for Raquel at this moment, but I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:27:59 Who says, I would never trust you around my man. You're calling her like a man's stealer, which did that turn out to be true. Yes, and again. I will send future Lala roses at this moment, but at this time, that's not a nice thing to say to somebody. What the hell?
Starting point is 00:28:16 That's why I'm going nuts with this episode because I'm like, there was a pardon me that was like good for you, Rick Lala was trying to like, Lala was just like, I'm gonna just say this really mean thing to you right now It's a girl's trip. Yeah, it's girl's trip But I'm just gonna say something that's gonna make you feel like shit under the guise of like like honesty Slash you may have a drinking problem And I was like good for a keel for standing up and like just clapping back the way Lala would have clapped back. Cause if like if there was reverse,
Starting point is 00:28:46 Lala would have been like, well thank God, you don't have a man. Well, for the fuck around with you know that, and you're ugly and you're stupid. And you're grumpy, you're supposed to be. Pussy's dried up and none and all the other stuff. Lala would have said that. So yeah, so I was like, I was just happy that Rekel
Starting point is 00:29:00 stood up to Lala in that moment. Unfortunately, did it wind up being a personality revealing trade? Yes. I did it. Unfortunately, yes. That's what I'm starting to think is I watch this episode. They're torturing this girl over and over for shit
Starting point is 00:29:17 she didn't do, basically, is how I'm looking at it. I feel like it's a form of gaslighting. It's like Lala, one minute says she's okay. In the next minute, she's got the group of girls around her, the group of mean girls, being like, oh, sledge, man, stealer, because you kissed Oliver and the... Rick Hell probably got to the point on this trip. This is why I'm saying this is the origin story episode of this whole thing. I think, Rick Hell, they finally traumatize and break down Rick Hell to where she's like,
Starting point is 00:29:45 fuck all of you, I will fuck one of your men then. I'm outta here. I'm getting rid of mom's name. No, what you have not. I'm not dead. I'm not dead. I will say you should not have done that to Ariana because Ariana had nothing to do with this.
Starting point is 00:29:59 It's like you're traumatized by the mean ones. Take it out on the mean ones. Doesn't Christine have somebody? She's dating that you could affect. Why would you do this to Ariana? Well, this is all, this is all, um, assuming that this, the other podcast, what she's saying is true because then everyone else is saying, oh, there was the footage of Tom Sandeval going to, uh, the, 27-year-old pageant thing. Wasn't Adriana with him on that one too?
Starting point is 00:30:29 Didn't she know too? I mean, who did I say? You said Adriana, which is funny to think that Adriana. Why am I doing that? Yeah, why do I do that to you? Pat, jeans on, on, on, on. I'm on that day. I'm on that day.
Starting point is 00:30:41 You should come see me do the boogie board. I can do it. Listen, I'd love, I'd love the idea that this was the origin story, like that Lala pushed to Rekel to the dark side, but even Lala, I will not blame for this behavior. I think Rekel has to just sit in it in her own. I'm not blaming her, but every story has, every, every act has a motivation and an intention and something that... Every villain has a mother that traumatized them.
Starting point is 00:31:10 And Lala is Rekel's mother right now. Well, I'm just saying this is a lot of accusing somebody and going after somebody for something she didn't even do. I could see leaving this and being like, fuck it, if you're gonna treat me like this anyway, I fuck you guys, you know? No, I can't see her doing that to Ariana, who's been nothing but kind to her.
Starting point is 00:31:28 Rihanna is the true victim in all this and it always goes that saying, team Ariana. But Lala, by the way, Lala is still trying, Lala is trying to also advance the narrative that Rakell has a drinking problem is like out of control. Cause she's like, you know what, I'm gonna shut this down.
Starting point is 00:31:48 Okay, because Rikels been drinking and it's like three in the morning, and I'm like going to bed, cause she's been drinking and she's drunk, okay? Drunk, okay. So like she keeps everything she says about Rikels, she keeps on mentioning how much she drinks, how drunk she is, that she's been drinking.
Starting point is 00:32:05 So she's really trying to kind of like, she's like, I saw track marks on our arms, you guys. We're gonna talk about this Smarroaks. So, Rikkel leaves and Christina's like, am I tripping or did she just say that? And Lala's like, yeah, I'm feeling that real Lala, that real Rikkel, oh no, I'm feeling that Lala come out. I don't want seer. You know, when Lala gets all like stream bad ass.
Starting point is 00:32:30 Like yeah. So she's like, yeah, if Rick Elk was not wasted right now, I'd put this bitch back in her grave. So what is this zombie show now? Was she in her grave before? I know that's what it was. She's in her grave. Well, when she was with James, that was sort of grave. Like, it was a grave situation. So then, Christina has to go get her stuff out of Lala's room because I guess her stuff, I'm sorry, not Lala's room
Starting point is 00:32:56 out of her Kels room. And so, and- Christina goes to get Katie's out of her room. No, she gets Lala's stuff. What does it matter? She has to go to her room. No, Katie says, oh my god, my stuff to get Katie's. Oh, no, she gets Lala's stuff. That doesn't matter. She has to go to get, she has to go to her. No, Katie says, oh my God, my stuff isn't a room. My toothbrush is there.
Starting point is 00:33:10 You're right. You're right. So then Lala's like, you give these hose an inch and they take a mile. Yeah, these hose. So she breathes in a Range Rover. So Christina goes to Rekel's room and she opens the door and it does look like a Tam's Tom Sand about living room in there because it's like, it's like blue light.
Starting point is 00:33:34 And she's like, oh my god, where are these lights coming from? And there's like stars. It's one of those star-lapped things that projectors with the star, the, you know, the space clouds or whatever those are called the guests who had that in my LA apartment for years me I slept to it every night for 12 years love that I I thought it looked actually look pretty cool. I hate the fact that I sound like such a recal defender on this episode that I'm going I'm like defending her projector for a while but I actually thought it looks cool
Starting point is 00:34:08 I'm not gonna like sit here and apologize for an hour and a half. This is my thing. I will. That's my love language is apologizing for an hour and a half. That's like how I tell the audience I love them. But that projector did look cool. So she gets the stuff. Thank you. I feel validated because my projector was completely
Starting point is 00:34:23 dist in this episode. Now, was it awkward on hookup? Might sure, okay, but I only really turned it on for special people. Okay, go ahead. You know what? I don't listen. It should be okay. Listen majority of people in this country love Marvel movies. That's all basically like a star projector. That's a star projector movie Okay, so if you can like a Marvel movie, you can like a star projector. So Christina She's like oh my god like the only I only know like one other person who has this galaxy light And it's like a three-year-old girl name dronny So I like when she's like being bitchy, she's like where are these sites coming from?
Starting point is 00:35:05 And we're gonna say, Christina, you are welcome to sleep in my room. Like she's so excited somebody came to see her. And she said, no, just came to get back so we can continue to call you a sled upstairs. Excuse me. So she leaves. And then Lala's like, well, good. Think you don't have good think you don't have a man. The second that came out of her mouth, I think she wanted to like retract, retract. I could tell, no, she didn't.
Starting point is 00:35:29 She felt no guilt at all, sorry. No. She didn't. Everyone's not terrified of you, Lala, okay. You can whip out your black sand all you want. It just makes you look like a cheese ball. Okay, no one's afraid of you. So Christina, she comes back and she's like,
Starting point is 00:35:44 gosh, she was listening to music and LaLyx Taylor Swift. She was listening to music and the whole room was like covered with lights like all over the ceiling and they're like lights, disgusting. I'm like, well, then you better not compliment the starry light display at shorts and sand use next time you walk in there man So Lala's like oh my god you guys is she gonna murder us tonight and Rekel is listening at the door now, okay?
Starting point is 00:36:15 She's been like I'm gonna go hang out with the girls, but her the girls who now accept me Yeah, right girls have been sad to me and brought me on their trip so I'm gonna go listen to them This is such a freeform show, by the way. So Christina's like, you need to lock your door. I'm not even kidding. And Katie goes, hide your kids, hide your boyfriend, hide your boyfriend, and hide your boyfriend.
Starting point is 00:36:36 And they're all laughing. And Raquel goes back to her room to cry while the girls are laughing. Yeah, that's just where I was like, this is how every fucking high school revenge movie starts, you idiots, okay? One by one, you're gonna get murdered. One by one, and the audience is going to cheer.
Starting point is 00:36:53 Raquel may have wound up being, like truly one of the biggest villains of 2023 in our world, but like, I will never fail to like have my heart broken whatever I see, like the classic girl, outsider girl, listens in and hears the mean Yeah. So, they're laughing and, um, look cool, look cool. I don't know where that word came from. By the way, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but'm like, honey, you are on Vanderbump rules. That is kind of part of being on a girl's trip. No, the girl's trip is where you go get drunk and have fun. I mean, they'll still judge each other, but everybody's getting drunk and having fun, except on this one. Okay, they judge each other at the end of the night every single time. I mean, how many times that they,
Starting point is 00:37:57 well, it's always like the Russian roulette, like who's going to be the one who gets the judgment bullet, right? It's going to be, it's either going to be Kristen, it's going to be the Kristen or Katie. It's always going to be one of, it's either gonna be Kristen, it's gonna be the Kristen or Katie. It's always gonna be one of them, like, oh my God, like you cannot share a room with Kristen, she's a disaster, she's like terrible, she's so needy, she always has to open up the window. Katie, she's always crying on the trips, oh my God, she's terrible.
Starting point is 00:38:17 And also, Kristen was the last one that they were like, she's a drunk, she has a drinking problem. So remember when they went on that girls trip to the wine country or whatever, and Kristen's like, oh my God, we're safe. Whoa! I mean, my God. Did she eat a flower off the highway?
Starting point is 00:38:31 You remember that? She literally ate like a wild flower. Oh, God. So, um, while I was like, yeah, I'm locking my fucking door tonight. And Rikkel cries herself to sleep under her pink lights. And I just might notice how I'm, how am I on Rikkel's team right now?
Starting point is 00:38:55 This show is like a fucking miracle worker. This show is such a mind-fuck. Like, it's crazy. I was, I had to tell myself, Ben, stop it. Stop feeling sympathy for Raquel. Raquel is a terrible person doing terrible things and she's our sweet Ariana. Stop feeling sympathy for her.
Starting point is 00:39:11 Well, you know, every murder case, and I bring this up a lot, because I watch a lot of murder trials and stuff like that, or shows about them. And it's always like a slam dunk case until they get up there with their victim story. And then by the time you hear their whole story, you're like, oh, okay.
Starting point is 00:39:27 You know, I'm sorry about that triple homicide, but you know, after hearing everything you went through, you really only deserve six weeks. You know, good luck to you, sir. I'm just gonna wait for Naomi Frye in the New Yorker to write like an intelligent thing piece about this all. And I'll be like, yes, yes, this captured it all. So now it's the morning, and they're talking about,
Starting point is 00:39:51 oh, that Navy guy, the guy who's like, yeah, I got tattoos all over because I got them in the Navy when I was serving. I was the Navy, him. But I was serving the USS Silver Lake, you know? He was, yeah, I was at a pack of intelligence, he had coffee on sunset junction. It's a Williamsburg.
Starting point is 00:40:12 Yeah, it's a Williamsburg. Being on the front lines of Echo Park. That was rough. A little lake there. The things that I saw in prospect, I was rough. Yeah, so he was texting Katie all night, of course, the things that I saw in prospect, I was rough. Yeah, so he was texting Katie all night, of course, because this idiot at the disco pussy,
Starting point is 00:40:30 you know, with his CG, BG or whatever tattoo is thinking he's getting discovered, you know? So he's texting Katie all night and Christine's like, he wanted you to go meet him. And while I was like, yeah, she was thinking about it. And Katie's like, you know, and then I was just tired. I just was too tired. So it just goes to show you, even when you really don't like somebody, you can identify with them often, you know. I mean, Katie has everything I should like, she loves the couch, she loves like go nowhere, kind of hobbies like
Starting point is 00:41:00 crocheting and stuff like that. Go nowhere. Oh'll be. Oh, I thought you meant I see you're saying like you don't have to go anywhere to do the vibe. I thought you meant like it's a hobby that's going to take our nowhere in life. Both, both. Okay. You know, that is what I meant and take you to life. Well, that's, you know, you know, the thing is that Katie probably is way too close to who we are as people, unfortunately, which is why we've always had a hostile reaction
Starting point is 00:41:23 to her. We don't deal with mirrors, you know? But then Lala finds one point. Just be for yourself. I literally have them everywhere. I have one. Like, I watch myself take a shot. I don't like it turned on or anything,
Starting point is 00:41:34 but I usually just stand there and criticize myself and call myself horrible names. But I mean, it's fun for me. You know, we all spend our times in different ways. OK, go ahead. This. Ha ha ha ha ha. spend our time in different ways. Okay, go ahead. So Lala finds some crumbs on the duvet and she's like a remnants of Brickell Levis. And I was like, to fuck you, I don't know, I got so mad.
Starting point is 00:41:55 I was like, it's just a crumb Lala. It's probably from you. Probably from wherever was there at the Paris Hotel in Casino, which we still have not received a free room for. And so Lala is like, you know, I like Raquel without James, but like what she showed up with on this bed last night, I was appalled. Like appalled. She sat down with her giant, you know, popery of leftovers and was just like sitting there and you're like, used like, I don't trust you about my
Starting point is 00:42:24 man. When you drink, I don't trust you around my man. When you drink, I don't trust you at all, Rick. Like you came for her and she defended herself. She clapped back. She did not come to you right in that moment as a monster, which she later became, but in that moment she was not. So Lala's like, I've been the person who gets wasted
Starting point is 00:42:41 and sets the most out of pocket things you've ever heard. And then we see a Lala's greatest hits of like, I see we haven't all been working on our summer bodies. Still so good. I miss the classic Lala. Yeah, I miss the Lala who is just a shitty person and not like a shitty person pretending they're like a good person. I don't, I don't like that.
Starting point is 00:43:05 I just prefer shitty people. You know, just stay shitty everybody. That's my advice. So she's like, I mean, I feel nervous with anyone who's a liability and it's gonna be unpredictable. Momma, you literally gathered your friends on China's roof to sign NDAs.
Starting point is 00:43:19 I mean, that's all I have. Is there more of a liability to be friends with than somebody like that? Like who's literally threatening to sue you for anything that could possibly ever happen in front of them? So then Rekal comes in and Mala's like, how do you feel? You look great. No, after all that shit, Doc.
Starting point is 00:43:41 Now, it's like, you look great, like so fake. So Rekal's like um I feel something for sure it's sort of like a buzzing stinging feeling but that's I think because I put a spoon in the microwave after all sorry and because she heard them talking shit about her right so she's like I guess I felt something and Katie's like oh really what is that something and she goes well I feel embarrassed actually Katie's like, oh really? What is that something? And she goes, well, I feel embarrassed actually. Katie goes, actually, that's a bit of a relief to hear. So.
Starting point is 00:44:12 Yeah, they were like happy about that. And Raquel does like that hedge where she pretends she doesn't remember what she said. She goes, I feel like I said something offensive towards Lala. And Lala said, I think anybody who is a woman would take offense to what you said. I was like, sort of like probably any woman would take offense to you saying, I would not trust you around my man. I don't know. I'm just just picking out loud.
Starting point is 00:44:36 Yeah. Okay. I mean, stupid. So, um, Rick Hells like, oh God. And she says, I mean, do you feel that way? Like if I, if someone said, I don't know if I'd feel comfortable with you having one too many drinks around my dude, do you really feel like, well, if you can't keep him, here I am, that's not what she said. How are you turning that?
Starting point is 00:44:57 How are you getting that from what she said? I think that that's an unfair jump, don't you? Yeah, well, I mean, I don't think it's an unfair job. I think it's like, it was like heavily implied in that. And I, again, I'm loathed to give Raquel the benefit of the doubt, considering that she did actually wanted to act like that, what the behavior she ultimately displayed in real life.
Starting point is 00:45:20 But I kind of felt like Raquel was just clapping back in that moment. I don't think Raquel was really like, well, if you can't keep him up, I'm going to have him. I could see it. I could see how it's interpreted that way. I can't be honest. She said, I would have trouble having you around my man. And Rikel said, well, then thank God you don't have a man. You don't have to worry about me. That's how I took it. But yeah, no, I mean, I, I know I take it that way too. I took it as a clapback, but I'm just saying, I could see how someone could feel like,
Starting point is 00:45:49 whoa, that's a fucked up thing to, to, to respond with. I really could, but I just feel like what Lala is discounting is that she started with something fucked up. So she goes, so do you really feel that way? Because if you do feel that way, I'm not your audience. And I want nothing to do with it except like, you know, like when I fucked your boyfriend, right? You know, like, or when I ran, like when I fucked his wife's husband, that was cool, but I respect relationships. And I feel like you do too, because six years ago when I drunkenly hooked up with your fiance, and that's still something that does not feel great, right? I mean, none of this
Starting point is 00:46:23 would have happened if you had, if you had not had one, two many. So what? So. That's, I, yeah, I think that's what's so frustrating for me is that like, I think that like this episode, I'm really feeling more anti-Lala than I am pro Raquel, but the active being anti-Lala sort of by default makes you pro Raquel. And that's just a really terrible place to be in on March, you know, March, whatever today is, 2023.
Starting point is 00:46:52 No, I'm like in the beginning of a murder show. I'm sorry, I keep saying murder. I know nobody's been murdered on this show yet, but I feel like if I'm watching a 10 part murder show, before the murder doesn't happen till the last episode, right? You know, it's like all leading up to this big finale of the murder. I don't really hate the murder yet because I haven't murdered anybody yet you know like I don't adjust the history in the episode to start hating the person already I start looking for clues
Starting point is 00:47:19 as to what turned them into whatever happens in the end. But right now, have no problem with her. So then, Rickels, like, yeah, it's a little weird that Lala, if all people, is schooling me on respecting relationships, so I am doing Lala, on respecting relationships, when she was the one who slapped with my boyfriend. And she's like textbooks definition of a hypocrite.
Starting point is 00:47:45 And that's true. That's true. That's exactly true. It's time for commercial. It's time for... Hi, I'm Michael Patrick King, host of the official Max Companion podcast, and just like that, the writers room.
Starting point is 00:47:57 Each episode, members of the writers room and I unpacked moments from season two, sharing juicy details you can only hear from us. Stream and just like that, season, starting June 22nd on Max, and listen to end just like that, the writers room on Max or wherever you get your podcasts. So now the girls they all pack up and they're going to go drive off to like have a zoo and then we go over to Schwartz's apartment where this Sierra, not the not the musician, but a girl named Sierra, shows up to style Tom. And of course, he like shows up in a robe because he's like, oh, sorry. And she's like, yeah, this is how he dresses.
Starting point is 00:48:40 He needs your help. Hi, I'm Gina. Hi. I think her name is Shira. I mean, I guess it doesn't share the matter, but you know, gotta respect the Shira's out there. She is like, yeah, I feel like shorts is someone that I can rebuild too, because I've had experience through to points. Ah, and so they're gonna spice up his wardrobe. And she's like, yeah, we need big, big,
Starting point is 00:49:03 big energy from shorts. So however, I can help I will. So then basically shorts are just looking through lots of shirts and he's like, oh, should I wear this? That's a five. That is a five. What a five. Oh my god. So here I must watch this show because she literally just brought in his wardrobe again. She just kept bringing in flowered shirts, except these ones are from like Tommy Bahama instead of old Navy. And they don't smell like river. So she's a, so yeah, she just goes in and basically throws out all his other shirts, slash couples
Starting point is 00:49:43 costumes. So then we go back to Arizona as the girls are driving through the desert. By the way, one of the most scenic car scenes I feel like we've seen on this show. It's like beautiful landscape on the outside. So then, um, I mean, what else did they have really? I mean, fucking Katie girls drop. But I mean, like, half a sea is a beautiful place, right? I would assume so. I mean, pretty much to the rest. According to the desert, the American Southwest, it's a dream. I'm just saying this is just more beautiful than watching the valley outside a window
Starting point is 00:50:17 or like the drive to Azusa. So Christina's like, so Katie, I noticed that your mom seemed to have a little bit of tiny hope that this could all work out with you and Tom. I mean, I think it looked like she had hope. I couldn't see because there was like a bird cage literally in front of her face at dinner, but it looked like it was hope coming through the bars. And Katie is like, well, Thomas spent every holiday with my family for like the last ten years.
Starting point is 00:50:42 And Christina says, yeah, it's like crazy that think you can spend so much time with someone and then your whole life and then just boom, like that. They're gone, need a clean X? I know. That's the way you're trying to be cry every five minutes. It's like one moment, it's there and then one moment. It's like this thing that you absolutely love. It's like we know one of your favorite TV show gets canceled and you're like what
Starting point is 00:51:08 about that cliffhanger? It's just like gone and you never see it again. The Kleenex, Kleenex I can still offering the Kleenex Katie. So back to Shira. She's like oh so those Gucci shoes and shorts is like I can't get rid of those. Katie got me those and she goes, okay, Shira, do you think first mental health that he should have a lot of things in his closet that remind him of the Mirichies nobonger in Yes or No? Also, would you accept print a canvas of my face?
Starting point is 00:51:39 And Shira's like, well, you know what we could do is that we could put it into like an archival box. You're talking about my print to canvas because those are really meant for the wall. I'm just saying it's like really pretty on the wall. No, I'm just talking about the Gucci shoes. Okay. So um, Shoritz is like don't put them in a box. You can't do that. Don't put those shoes in a box. And she says, well she's planning to tell Trip to celebrate her divorce from you. She's in the box and she says, well, she's planning to tell Tripp to celebrate her divorce from you.
Starting point is 00:52:05 And he's like, what? It's a divorce trip. And she says, yeah, it is. It is a divorce trip. And you know what? I think that this week, I'm going to throw you in like a boy's night, which is basically like an enchiladas night, but just for for boys.
Starting point is 00:52:18 And I'll like host it so like, I hang on, I'm doing. Ah! Ah! So she's like carrying the words, oh, short says, hearing the worst divorce party, I can't help but feel the obligation to get drunk and make out with someone. I was like, wow, that's so weird. It's the same reaction you had to the words wedding party. Or just any party to be honest, or just
Starting point is 00:52:40 the word any engagement party or just just just punctuation really got you that place. So she was like, I'm gonna start right getting the shorts back. And shorts is like, no, well, I don't want a prostitute. I don't want a prostitute. That's what you're saying. No!
Starting point is 00:52:58 I'm saying that. Who suggested a prostitute? You fucking weirdo. I know. Yeah, that was a revealing moment. Yeah, that was revealing moments. Yeah, so then he tries on another, he tries on like a brown sweater with a different colored brown pair of pants.
Starting point is 00:53:13 And he's like, wow, looking me now, I feel like I'm gonna open another restaurant. Well, he got to looking like a potato sack. Why not a third? Why not a month? My, my, my, my, my, my fashion icon is a potato. So it's like the worst you look, the more people hand you, just keep that failing on upwards, Tom, you've got to go right so far.
Starting point is 00:53:35 Who am I to criticize? So Katie is saying that she wants shorts to be her best friend, but like they're trying to work out some gigs. I kind of just feel so badly for her actually, because I just feel like it's just not realistic, at least not right now for them to be best friends. Like maybe down the line, but it kind of breaks my heart,
Starting point is 00:53:54 because I'm like, I feel like so many times I've seen friends go through breakups and they try to be best friends right away, and that's what leads to it being actually so much worse and so much more bitter than it could have been. So I'm like, Katie, no, no, this is a bad path. Just, just don't talk to him for a year. That's what you have to do. Well, I'm thinking that she has seen him treat his friends so much better than his wife that she figures maybe she'll get more respect as a friend, but she still shows up acting like his wife. Oh, it's like it's a wash, you know, but I agree with you.
Starting point is 00:54:28 A phrase not often used with Tom Schwartz, by the way. Yeah. So Christina's like, that's good because sometimes people treat breakups like a death, you know? Like I don't know, I mean with jams, did you have to talk and have to have a talk with him and say, this isn't working or did you just sleep abruptly or did you try to sleep with one of his close friends to upset him that was possibly already in a relationship? So, Rickel is like, well, after how we exploded at my dad at Thanksgiving, remember, because that was over shoes. He was so enraged in the car ride back home to hotels saying that my dad is only with my mom
Starting point is 00:55:09 because he's miserable and he's pathetic and my mom's a bitch. Like, oh God, it's like these moments were like, who is the worst on this gas? That's a joke. Who is the worst person? Like, if Lala are the worst, I think. The merry-go-round of awfulness continues. Yeah, they are just terrible. Okay, both of them are just fucking terrible
Starting point is 00:55:30 terrible terrible and this was supposedly when James was sober. I'm sure you know not see that goes to show you You can't blame everything on being drunk all the time So Rickels like yeah, he couldn't stop himself from saying really low blows. And he said my dad's miserable because he's married to a fat bitch and that my dad isn't a good dad. So I told him he needs to shut up
Starting point is 00:55:53 or I'm gonna make him walk home. Is it like what is the age limit on those camps that they send children to where they stick them in the, like the Wyoming wilderness. Yeah, those are the structural camps. Is it too late for James? Can we send them out there in the wilderness?
Starting point is 00:56:14 We have to forge for berries and water. So, Raquel goes, yeah, I was planning on leaving him when he went to London. And Lala's like, were you even going to tell him? And she goes, no, I was going to pack up my stuff and leave the ring box with the ring inside of it. So it makes sense. Singing of leaving the ring inside of the pizza box, what if it's really the way? And Lala goes, that's cold. Yeah, Lala's sticking up for James.
Starting point is 00:56:41 I mean, this woman, like seriously, Lala. No, it's not really that unheard of when you're with a fucking abusive person. And what else would you call James, you know? You fucking run away in the middle of the night. Yeah, that's, yeah, that's terrible. So, so then Lala's, so now So then Lala's, so now, Rick Loss saying that she felt like she was so focused on James and she lost her identity. Did you say this part that she lost her identity? She lost her identity. And now she's like, she's now, she says that single, like it's single my new identity.
Starting point is 00:57:20 Like, she's like, I'm a single girl in LA. That's like my new identity. And Lala's like, what does that mean? What am I supposed to be doing? Yeah, she's like, what does that mean? Like you're trying to figure out what you're doing and Raquel goes, yeah, literally people have been asking me, Raquel, who are you?
Starting point is 00:57:36 And you know what my answer is? A girl who took out a C and added a Q. Otherwise, I don't really know. And Katie's like, it's OK. You're going to figure it out. And Christine is like, ew, are you crying? Ew, let me out. Let me out of the car.
Starting point is 00:57:53 Let me out of here. Disgusting. Disgusting. So are you crying right now? Did you just figure out the guy you liked isn't married? We can't go for him anymore. It's going on. So they're like, so they have to like pull over the car because we're
Starting point is 00:58:12 kills basically like hyperventilating and stuff and she's like, she's just like sobbing and she's like, I feel shaky and like heaving and everything. And so she's having a panic attack. She's like, I don't feel good. And Christina's like, really gross. So they pull over and Lala's like, okay, Rick Elk. Breathe through your mouth and exhale through your nose. Breathe through your mouth and exhale through your nose.
Starting point is 00:58:39 And I was like, is that right? And Rick Elk's like, she goes, yeah, Christina, sorry, Christina goes sparkly, water, can you breathe better? And then like, oh, it's in through your nose and out through your mouth, I meant, do that, do that. And she goes, oh, because you said, in through my mouth and out through my nose, and I'm like, I can't do it that way, it's not working.
Starting point is 00:59:02 You can't breathe out your nose. The fuck is wrong with you. She was trying to breathe out her ears. She got a little confused. And Katie got so, I heard it the right way. I heard it the right way. Katie wins. Katie wins the points for understanding
Starting point is 00:59:16 the best way to do breath work. She wins that one too. And then earlier, Rickel's like, yeah, Christine is, Christine, because I think you're just holding in a lot of emotion, like a lot. And Katie goes, I'm a pro at that one. Okay, Katie, you win everything. Okay. Can you let the girl hopper fucking panic attack? Oh, yeah. So they're just like going through that. And so now like Rick Hells like laughing
Starting point is 00:59:40 a little bit and everything. And so then Rick Rick Lissan is just like, I beat myself up over everything, over everything. And Lala's like, yeah, last night, from my perspective, as someone who's sought and who was sober, you're replaying it in your mind. And like, okay, like you're funny, you enjoyed yourself, like listen, we're all good. Everything is fine, we are good until tonight, when I come at you again.
Starting point is 01:00:04 When I come at you for no fucking reason again over the same exact thing, okay. And bring my two backups with me. Yeah. So Katie, guys, just remember you're not alone. Do you have... Can she keep this bottle of sparkling water? That sparkling water, Christina gave you. Okay. Hey, I'm noticing that there's like a novelty volleyball that we can hang from a dashboard and that gift shop over there. That's for you,
Starting point is 01:00:32 Rachel. That's your new friend. And all like Jules and Lala Gus, just keep your head where your feet are. So what are you giving her? Like how to land a husband tips? like how to land a husband tips. I don't know. I lost. Who's on the board? It's like, it's like her own weird Casey Kason sign off. Keep your head on, keep your feet on the ground
Starting point is 01:00:51 and keep reaching for the ankles. This has been La La Scents. Keep your head where your feet are. America's top 40 man's dealers. So they get to Lake Havasu and it's a really pretty house. It's like a Spanish style house. And Katie's like, I just want to have good girl time and bond and talk to cute boys. Yep. Yeah. Well, welcome to Lake Havasu, the place where Vicki Gumbelson got nailed in the face with a football. Those are the guys you're gonna meet.
Starting point is 01:01:25 So, um, yeah, so then, they're like, then Kitty goes, where's Charlie? So then Charlie shows up fresh from her Gwen Stefania edition. She's like, hello, hello, single horrors. Wow, this house is so nice. I actually believe like this feels very sincere because I'm getting the sense that Charlie lives in a studio closet. She's got her hot plate and she's got a Mr. Coffee and basically a chair.
Starting point is 01:02:00 It's been there. So Charlie's loving it. And so she hugs Christine. And Christine is like, I've heard so much about you, which we all, anybody who knows Kristina from the show knows with that man. She's like, yeah, stupid. Be.
Starting point is 01:02:14 Be. So Charlie's like, yeah, I don't really know that girl. All I know is that she used to work at Sir. And now she sells lip balm for a living. So I did have a look at the lip balm though. Like your auditioning for Winston-Font is make a brand. So, you know, hey, let's go back to Los Angeles. So we're at Tom Tom and the Toms are there and they're saying hi to guests.
Starting point is 01:02:40 Tom Tandoval is looking at some girls to make out with or whatever. And Max is behind the bar and shorts is like Oh, so we're thinking about putting a spritzer on the menu thinking about you know like Selter LA river runoff water and some apparel what do you think? So a couple things every time we see shots of this restaurant We see we see bleach blonde ladies with really bad weave tracks. Like they're always visible. It's something we see often. I'll say when they show this restaurant. Another observation right off the bat is Tom is in like a lightning horizontal stripe where it comes as like lightning on his collar. Sure, and I think he's wearing his lightning necklace.
Starting point is 01:03:26 That has something to do with Tom Tom, right? Do they just use that lightning bolt or what? Or because I know that that's like the code for Tom and Rinal. Maybe the lighting bolt represents the stroke of genius that came from the my show, Nicky Lane! Tom Tom logo. I'm gonna look at it. You see? Nope, don't see a lightning. Oh, but that's mapping a location. Oh yeah, Tom Tom is the garment thing.
Starting point is 01:03:56 Remember? Oh, yeah. Tom Tom, rest or? Yeah, remember. I'm remembering it now. I don't see lightning bolts. No, but see, I'm always trying to put together the clues. I'm like, is all this lightning stuff?
Starting point is 01:04:07 It's gonna be like, because they're already having an affair. What's happening? I do love putting together the clues. Like, it's like that Jim Carrey movie where he was like writing scribbles all over the walls and everything except everything's like pretty basic here. It's like, wait, she has a lighting bolt.
Starting point is 01:04:25 She has a lighting bolt. Oh yeah, they're having a fair. Okay, that was pretty quick. That's pretty busy, Mr. Yeah. So, um, sand of all is like, well, Greg's great, but we're not seeing high to high on getting our police open.
Starting point is 01:04:37 So basically they're talking about how they can't get this restaurant open still and should they take Lisa's offer at giving them their $50,000 back or not? And shorts is like, my head says do it, my heart says don't do it, my feet say don't put my shoes in a box, don't put my shoes in a box, Katie got these shoes for you. Oh, my feet have been crying ever since Christopher Lloyd killed that shoe and who from Roger Rabbit. But listen, whatever stopped these guys from listening to their heads on the show, like literally no one has used their heads on the show in 10 years.
Starting point is 01:05:17 So I say, die best from Tom Tom and have fun with it. So I was listening to a Bravo docket, which I love, you know, of course, they didn't episode about all of this stuff. So Greg, Greg owns the lease to this restaurant, which we knew, right? We knew from the Vanderpump being like, wait, what? You're paying him rent.
Starting point is 01:05:38 So he owns the lease. He also owns the liquor license to this. So they pointed out that Tom took out a mortgage on his house with Ariana that she is on the hook for. So, you know, she's already had that. And that was around $250,000. And he's mentioned on the show that he borrowed $250 from his parents. So that's 500 grand. And he doesn't own the lease or the, well, you don't own a lease. You know that is so bad. He doesn't hold a lease. And he doesn't hold the liquor license. And this is right after Tom Tom and Pump both closed
Starting point is 01:06:10 for their liquor license lapses and other violations. Yes. And Pump reopened, but no, not Pump. Tom Tom reopened, but Pump still doesn't have its liquor license. Pump has a sign up on their door, because my friend Ross walked by and took a picture of it. And they have a sign up on their door because my friend Ross walked by and took a picture of it. And they have a sign up on their door saying, do do the recent rains, we are unfortunately closed.
Starting point is 01:06:31 Like, wasn't quite the rains because you're liquor license expired. Yeah, so yikes. So at least their chairs didn't catch on fire this time. But I know at least it was in another fire, at least it's like damage, radiance, so we can't have another fire. another fire. So what does this mean for Ariana? Because she's freeing if he defaults on his loan, her house is going to be taken.
Starting point is 01:06:53 Oh, and now they're not even on a relationship anymore. That is so fucked up. That is like this is all like feels this actually feels scary. This feels scary and gross. Like it feels like one of these things, like you know, you hear these stories way more than you ever think you would of like a friend who it turns out her husband has like a secret life of gambling and gambled everything away and lost everything away.
Starting point is 01:07:18 And this is not gambling per se, but it's basically, it is kind of like gambling. Yeah it is. And it's like, it's not like going to the gambling. Yeah, he's not going to the craft table. But like, it's one of these things where it's basically, it is kind of like gambling. Yeah, it is. And it's like, it's not like gambling. It's not going to the craft table. But like, it's one of these things where it's like, what is, how does she extricate herself? Like, can they renegotiate or redo that mortgage
Starting point is 01:07:33 that way she's not on it? Or like, that's so fucked up, because it feels like. Yeah, it's fucked up. Because it feels like that. It feels like that. It's like, what? And she goes, yeah, Tom's going to take out a loan on the mortgage. And she's like, no, but you're going to, you're going to be involved in that. And Ariane was like, no, no, it's just for his part of the house. That's all we have to do.
Starting point is 01:07:54 It doesn't work. More like they don't take half a house kind of thing. So they were saying on Bravo.get. So yeah, it's, well, maybe they can sell the house and recoup the money that way. I mean, that could be the thing. But if you sell the house, the money goes to the lean first, not to you. Well, yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah, that's bullshit. They should never have taken out all that personal money to build to do a restaurant. That's crazy. I think that's crazy. And now he's totally destroyed his public reputation. Those know, like the restaurants, those restaurants, the big appeal is because of those guys. So that's it. That's terrible. Yeah. So he's like, Tom Schwartz is like, I have an idea.
Starting point is 01:08:33 Let's consult what I can sort with for all of my financial decisions. The magic April. Should we divest from Tom Tom? And it says, yes, darling darling definitely to it what a bargain I knew I shouldn't have bought this Lisa it's like just filled with pumpkin juice on the inside it's like rises do like a hot pink liquid so a little tiny banner from swinging around on the little triangle in there. Hello. Mika-le. When you shake it, it just goes, Oh, you should shake it.
Starting point is 01:09:11 You should shake it. So then here comes DJ James Kennedy walking in, Hall of Fives. And Schwartz is like, are you a fan of Spitzer? He's like, oh, I don't know. I spritz, I don't know. He's like, well, check this out. It's a beer spritzer. I was like, that looks nasty.
Starting point is 01:09:32 That's terrible. It's literally like the river water of Spitzer's. Yeah, so James is like, so they tell him about how they're gonna do this guys party. Schwartz is like, yeah, tomorrow night let's do a guys night sky bar Let's be hooligans and plus sheen is gonna come and James like Josh Sheen to then cuz otherwise it's not guys Now I can accept Sheen as a guy right, but Ali's expressed that I shouldn't be around for care right now
Starting point is 01:09:57 You know it was cool in the beginning, but we're kind of been around too much now I mean regga wouldn't even know Tom Tom without, without me. No, she know really, but he has found your own life. Next thing, you know, it's DJ fucking Rick out of DJ. See you Wednesday. It's a book off. I am just imagining see you next Wednesday with a Raquel and she's like doing like that. She's like, wiki, wiki, wiki, but she's like doing it to the wallpaper. It's like for Cal's use the music machinery. Alexa, play something from Taylor Swift. But James is also, it's like, you wouldn't know any of these people
Starting point is 01:10:33 if it weren't for Kristen. And you wouldn't have your night at Sir without Kristen. So, crap. It's just a circle of the circle of Vanderpump life. Yep. So then Sandivval's like, do let's go have some fun. James just texted me,
Starting point is 01:10:49 let's get shorts as dick wet. So let's go dude. Which is just yet another wonderful piece of terrible foreshadowing on this show. Foreskin foreshadowing. Yeah. So I was sorry, I was thinking I was like foreskin. I was like, I got a visual thinking I was like for skin. I was like I got a visual. I was like for skin. I was like it's sort of like word play and there's sort of a iteration. Let's just say it and see what happens. I was like what for skin. I guess for skins are word for me that just automatically gets me picturing all the different types. You know, I was like, wow. There's thread and yellow and green and brown
Starting point is 01:11:26 and scarlet and black and no-gram. I'm just doing all the Joseph dream coat lyrics. So anyway, we go back to Lake Havasu and we go to a place called Martini Bay and then under it, under the sign it says, food, cocktails and fun. And then his Katie Wattsendert, it just he races the fun part. It's like,
Starting point is 01:11:48 I go inside. Yeah, this place, they come and dress all nice, all LA, and everyone in this establishment is wearing tricker caps, but not the hipster kind, and t-shirts and golf polos or whatever. And there's a sign up thatup that says whiskey tastes like heaven burns like hell Just another night at martini bay and Lala they keep making these pronouncements every time they go somewhere Lala's like I feel like tonight's gonna be chill
Starting point is 01:12:21 Have you noticed that they do that and then later What's your bonus, Christine? It's like, I feel like tonight's gonna be the perfect ending to the thing. Like they keep trying to set it up, but they all know it's just gonna end the same way every single mic. Anyway, Alrogra with leftovers, miserable.
Starting point is 01:12:36 They're like the Alrogras of social plans. So, in that they predict, they're forecasting what fun they will be having. They're forecasting. They're for a skin. But guess what? Did you know that al-adness? Did you know that I just learned like two days ago that al-roker is related to Lenny Kravitz? Isn't that? Really? Yeah. Because his mom is Roxy Roker and apparently Roxy Roker and al-roker are like cousins or siblings or something like that. So I just want-
Starting point is 01:13:07 So crazy because I'm related to Mrs. Kravitz, the neighbor on Bewitch, who won't stop spying. And that's why I'm such a nosy bitch. Yeah. And I just wish I related to Marley Gibbs, but I'm not. Okay, so Lala's like, wait, it's time's going to be a child. I feel a lot. And Rick, I was like, you should have seen me last night, Charlie, I'm happy you didn't. Like, I'll go, Rick, Lala is like, yeah, it was a rare gift. When Rick out drinks, she turns into a different person, okay, like a refrigerator with
Starting point is 01:13:40 chase and her down the street, making it out to be that. What is it? She's like, babies, babies were calling on the ceiling we're like no they're not we call and Katie's like yeah it's like the Hulk you are friends with Kristen Dodie for crying out loud this is listen we know Kristen Dodie we've watched Kristen Dodie on this show or Kelly's no Kristen Dodie okay so Christina but then again for Kelsey monster so for Christina is like this is different. This isn't like a normal. Oh, you're fine
Starting point is 01:14:08 Yeah, Lola goes yeah, she's a liability sk she's a liability's like you Mala you I can't I can't I can't I can't I hate so much I know there's these people yeah my my notice these people are such fucking monsters. I hate them I'm like the fending roll. Yeah, my my no disease people are such fucking monsters. I hate them. So then they order coconut shrimp hummus and a table side Caesar, which LOL fuck this restaurant. I know that's what I thought to.
Starting point is 01:14:33 It's a global and globally inspired menu. Oh, table side table side Caesar. So Charlie's like, are you having fun? Was it cool last night? Were the servers nice? LOL thought not leading at all. You're leading the witness, ma'am. Are you having fun? Was it cool last night? Were the servers nice? LOL. Thought not leading at all. Were you leading the witness, ma'am?
Starting point is 01:14:48 I know, Charlie came in with all the questions. She's like, okay, I'll just ask until someone gets me the information. So, Christina's like, speaking of our waiter, our server Oliver was cute and Charlie goes, was he nice? Was he tall? What do you look like?
Starting point is 01:15:04 Did you look like our cellbo baby, Annie Chan And she's like, yes, he was very nice, very, very nice. And everyone's like giving each other awkward looks. Katie's like, and then Bob is like, and Christine's like, her old clutching assholes all around the table. And so, uh, Rickel's like, guys, I'm just gonna go home and Charlie's like, what happened? And she says, I, Raquel's like, guys, I'm just gonna go home. And Charlie's like, what happened? And she says, I had a lot of drinks. And she goes, Oh, okay, so you made out. And Lala goes on the dance floor of disco pussy. Mm-hmm. So then Charlie looks at his Instagram and everything. And Raquel's like, Lala was into him too. And Charlie's, Oh, and then he's
Starting point is 01:15:42 swooped. And Raquel go, but she gave me permission and Lala goes, I have no intention of making that with him or smashing. So it was fine. And Charlie's like, Oh, okay. So fine. Then she got permission. So the food comes and then Lala's like, yeah, but by the way, it wasn't that when I was like, when we got back to the room, I was like, you with one too many drinks, I wouldn't trust you around my man. And then she said, thank God she don't have a man and Charlie goes, Oh, and then Charlie, thank God for Charlie. There's somebody to call it out because I feel like I'm taking crazy pills, you know. So Charlie is like, Oh, so what it sounds like is it someone wasn't chosen and it's a little bittersy now, right? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:16:23 So so Charlie says to them, she goes, you know, Requel never gets balzy and I like to see that Requel, you know, I like to see Requel get her confidence. I'm not saying it was the right thing to do, but like let's applaud the journey, you know? And LaLa's like, as a woman, that comment was not only offensive, it was also wrong on so many levels. And that should like never be anything anyone should be proud
Starting point is 01:16:46 of. I'm like that you may not well I may not be wrong but also she's totally again omitting what she said right before that. Yeah you started it. Sorry that that still works is that that child's logic still works on Vanderbump rules you started it. So Charlie is like, well, I mean, of course it was offensive. Of course it was wrong. I'm just saying, and Mala's like, it's never anything to be proud of. So Charlie tells us, I don't know him and Lala, the spokesperson for women,
Starting point is 01:17:18 but we need a new manager. Yeah, she's the last person I would want to speak for me. I mean, talk about how you went from a mansion back to an apartment. Like, let's get that one first of all. Yeah, I nominate Diane Weiss personally to be, you know, president of women. So Lala says, a comment like that takes me back to a time when I'm like in high school. And a cheerleader from the opposing team is like trying to snatch my man. I'm like, well, it's funny that you say that because you are literally acting like you're
Starting point is 01:17:46 in high school right now when you're the mean girls talking shit about one girl at this lumber party. I like that she's at least honest and puts herself on the cheerleader team. You know what I mean? I know. She did. She definitely did that. So, um, yeah, she's like trying to snatch my man up except you didn't have this man. This man didn't remember your face and this man literally walked away from you to make out with Raquel. Okay, sorry.
Starting point is 01:18:10 So Charlie's like, well, what I will say, and Maela goes, oh, what is she finding her voice? That's how you gonna do it? That's how you gonna do it. Bala is so embarrassing. I can't with Lala, she's embarrassing. And then Rick tells us, there was this moment in the car that I felt like maybe took place
Starting point is 01:18:29 that where we could all be friends, where I was hyperventilating in front of the Arbis. And we do have a lot in common, but because we both have slept with other people's men, but I'm not gonna take this shit anymore. I'm like, Rick, what led you to ever believe you're gonna be friends with these people? You naive, naive person. Yeah, so Rickl tries to do another like, you know, clap back, awkward back and it's just so bad. Yeah. She's like, honestly, if anyone should be on edge with you being with their men and
Starting point is 01:19:07 Christine is like what? Anybody? What is she like hyperventilating again? Did you have a stroke? What's going on? Hello, waiter. We'd like to order another order of what? What? It's other free refills on the what cocktail? What? What? Are there free refills on the, what? Cocktail. What?
Starting point is 01:19:25 So, Raquel stays calm and she just goes, okay, Lala, you subject James while we were together and Lala goes, you gotta get over that. She's gotta go. What? She just found out last week you fucking hypocrite. She just found out that like YouTube and lying and that when it's been brought up, she made like Lala's made Raquel feel like she was crazy. So she just found out that like YouTube and lying and that one has been brought up. She made like La La's made in recal
Starting point is 01:19:47 Feel like she was crazy. So she just found out. But of course this is where like the mind fuck really starts a kick in because I'm like She just found out but meanwhile Recal sleeping with Tom's hand of all this show is crazy Well, she's not sleeping with him yet, right? Well, we don't know We don't know I'm only know just because some random person on the internet says they weren't sleeping yet. Doesn't mean that they, you know, we don't know when it started.
Starting point is 01:20:12 Oh my gosh. So we're getting, what is the matter? I'm assuming they were. It matters to me. We need to find out. I need some DNA run. I need some samples. I don't know how do you find out this shit,
Starting point is 01:20:21 but just on law and order, they say run the DNA, you know. Yeah. So we're chaos like, well, um, but I shouldn't trust you around my man then. And Mala goes, but why? She goes, cause you slept with my man. And then Mala goes, I was drinking. It doesn't matter. Do anything when you're drunk, you're still going to go to jail for it. You know, being drunk isn't a fucking excuse for anything weirdo.
Starting point is 01:20:47 Yeah, and Rickel's like, well, I was drinking too. But also, I mean, if you get to use that as an excuse, and why doesn't she get to say, well, I was drinking so you can't hold anything against me? Also, I mean, I really, I sincerely thought, like, one of the big parts of recovery and I'm going through the 12 steps, et cetera, is the whole apology step that you are apologizing to people for the things you did when you were drinking. And it's like a little crazy to me
Starting point is 01:21:14 that Lala's take here is, you gotta get over that. Yeah, I was drinking, I was drunk. That's what happened, you gotta get over that. I was like, what about the, you know, making amends, et cetera? Like that just seems... Well, just to be fair, I don't think people make all of the steps. I think the ultimate step is just quitting the drinking.
Starting point is 01:21:32 So as many of the steps as you can use to get there, go for it, but girl, I ain't got nobody got time for all those steps. That's a lot of steps. I totally appreciate that. I just feel like Lala has been very much about... about talking about this stuff and being about it and then all of a sudden, when it's convenient, she's like fucking hip-hop right.
Starting point is 01:21:53 Lala's a fucking hypocrite, always has been, always will be. So Rick, I was like, yeah, but I was drinking too. And Charlie said, well, that's valid. She was drunk too. And Lala's like, oh, so you're gonna take six years ago to present day. She goes, yeah. And you go, well, let's not try it. That's not forget that you try to make out with short seas. And Rick, I was like, yeah, I initiated a make out, but it didn't happen. And she goes, oh, so you want to bring it back to six years ago, honey, well, I've the fucking billion lifetime since then.
Starting point is 01:22:27 billion lifetime since then. Great. So then Charlie's like, but you just brought this information to Lala. This is like new information, sort of like the new information that I did not get the Gwen Stefani ade. Everyone I'm very sad about it. So then love like, but now we've learned why. Now we've learned why. And if you can't respect that, then that's your issue. We learned why would it that mean? Learned why, now we learn why it just came up, because I don't know, I don't know what you mean. But Raquel goes, I don't respect that, and I don't respect that you slept with James while we were together. And I know you keep saying the comment was so offensive
Starting point is 01:22:59 to every single woman in the world. So now this is like, it's just so wild to me. That Raquel is saying this because I totally am backing Raquel and what she's saying here, but then I'm also like, but you're also sleeping with Tom Sandevol and you're betraying Ariana. If she is at this point, yeah, but if she is at this point, we don't know that she is at this point again. Like I would hope that she's not at this point. Me too. But either way there are still. I'm telling you this trip. I don't know that she is at this point again. Like I would hope that she's not at this point Me too, but either way there's a story I'm telling you this trip. I don't think they were at this point That's my guess, but it still fucked up that she would say this Knowing she said said this knowing how hurt she was about finding out that James
Starting point is 01:23:39 Had slept with Lala that she would then go and sleep with Tom Sandeval and portray someone like Ariana who has been in her corner and has been like universally really great to everyone and especially Raquel. Like that's where it's like, it's like that's what's crazy about this all. Yeah, so she's, Lala's like, it was shocking and I feel personally offended for anybody
Starting point is 01:24:03 in a relationship. She's so foolish. So she said nothing for anybody in a relationship. She's so foolish. So she said nothing about women in a relationship. You fucking nitwick, Lala. So Rick Hells like, I think I need to stand up for myself a bit here. And Mala goes, well, that ain't the way to do it. And Rick Hells says, I feel like Lala is being a hypocrite everybody. And Katie just rolls her eyes and just just why is she a hypocrite?
Starting point is 01:24:25 Oh, Katie and you and you, ma'am. Can we just roll all the clips where Katie's just calling Glala a stupid slut until Katie herself gets a chance to write the BJ? You fucking hypocrite too. So, Ritelle was like, she was shamed for sleeping with a guy who to your knowledge was separated. So she's, Rickel is like, Oh, okay, you want to keep coming at me for this? I'm going to go all the way back to the Randall stuff. And Lala goes, What are you getting at with this? What are you getting at? And Rickel goes, You slept with a married man Lala. Okay. Like that's how
Starting point is 01:24:58 you're being hypocritical. And Katie goes, And you tried to make out with a still married man who I, you know, I've been trying to leave. Who I'm currently having a party out of town to celebrate divorcing. Are you listening to yourself, okay? And trying to make out with somebody is different than fucking a married man with children, okay? For a Range Rover and Rolls and Terrible, be list Al Pacino movies.
Starting point is 01:25:24 No offense out. No, it's not your fault. Okay, for a range rover and rolls in terrible B-list Al Pacino movies No, that's out. That's a no it's not your fault and congrats on still working the point is shut up Katie So Raquel is like I literally just I entertained the idea that's all I can just shut your mouth And Katie goes I'm trying to move past some shit that you did Raquel and I've been very very Very gracious to you by inviting you on this extremely exciting girl's trip, but I don't have to be. I could literally light your ass on fire for what you've done. I'm not divorced from this man. Yeah, Katie is so about the rules yet she's had nothing to say to Lala for sleeping with the married man or sleeping with James, which is a fairly new revelation. She didn't care about that. She's like, fuck it.
Starting point is 01:26:05 It's like, what did... Raquel just deserve it, but you didn't? Like, why is it okay for some people? Well, why can you be best friends with someone who did that? But you have a major... I do think it is wild though. I do think it's wild though that Raquel was basically just a Katie's face. Like, oh yeah, I asked Schwartz if he wanted to make out.
Starting point is 01:26:25 Like, that is crazy. That is like, when Raquel did that, that was like, I can't believe this. This is, I get, I don't know. The whole thing, everything in this situation, everyone involved in this is a disaster right now. So Raquel is, she's like, well, I didn't make out with Schwartz and I'll like, stop taking credit for not making that with Schwartz. Okay, Schw I didn't make out a short. And Lala, like, stop taking credit for not making that with shorts.
Starting point is 01:26:46 Okay, shorts didn't make out with Duke. Okay, it didn't happen not because you were a standup check. Okay, it didn't happen because shorts denied you. Yeah, and Oliver didn't make out with you and Oliver denied you. So take those poopy nails and point them back at yourself. Okay, so Lala's like, it didn't happen. It's not because you were a standup check.
Starting point is 01:27:04 It didn't happen because he denied you, scuff. And Rick Lel's like, well, you slept with a married man. I mean, if you break it down, it's like, I don't need you to break down my situation that I live, cause you don't know shit about it. So I recommend you disengage immediately. And Rick Lel's like, people were calling you a mistress. Why do you think that is?
Starting point is 01:27:26 Cause he was married Lala. And she's like, this and this. Saka. Saka. So Lala's like, the word mistress hits such a nerve for me because Randall never had to defend himself. It is me who had to wear that and pay for someone else's actions. Oh, really? Like, really, just like you're blaming Raquel right now for Tom Schwartz's actions.
Starting point is 01:27:55 When Tom Schwartz was the one in the relationship with your friend, not Raquel. Where's your yelling at Schwartz? The only reason you ever got mad at Schwartz is because he spoke to Randall to play pickleball. You haven't gone against Swartz for this make out or flirting with her or whatever the hell else is going on. So whatever lady. True. So the girl's basically just all leave.
Starting point is 01:28:17 And it's just Charlie and Raquel left at the table. And Charlie just starts cracking up. She's just like, she's so ridiculous. And Rikkel is like, are we really getting in a car with him right now? And Charlie's like, that was really fucking hilarious, Rikkel. I love to watch people shake. It's so funny.
Starting point is 01:28:35 And she basically gets her high five. So then we get a song, so I didn't love you. Like I was supposed to. And it's an Ariana scene Yeah, and that is one of those moments in this episode. We were like, are you sure he didn't regret this? Yes Wow Yeah, so Ariana's in bed and Lisa facetimes her and you know cuz Ariana's grieving the loss of her dog
Starting point is 01:29:00 Darling, I was thinking of you. I've got all these little graves around my house I was thinking of you I've got all these little graves around my house Jiggy Piggy do me boom me frog and me to hose and flupe loopy part-time Nothing important snatches like okay. Well, that's that's sad I know listing all of her pets that are passed. I know she's like I I told Ken I'm going to bury him here too. Ah! Anyway, goodbye. So then we go to Sheena and Brock. They're taking a walk with Summer Moon and Sheena gets attacked and she goes, oh it's
Starting point is 01:29:34 work out. She says, hi I miss you when she's here. Brock's like, well I'm glad she's having fun. Hey Sheena, if you like climbing that tree. I could videotape you for the vlog. Yeah. I would rather be here with my family and than like being on a girl's trip with Katie and Chris Christina.
Starting point is 01:29:53 Team Tom, fine, whatever. That's fine. That's fine. And it almost looked like she was wiping tears away. Oh, she's seen that. So then Katie and Lala and Christina are in the kitchen in the morning just sitting around. And Christina is like,
Starting point is 01:30:05 did you guys sleep like at all? And then basically, just like, yeah, Christina, because I came down early and I got juice. I recall was like downstairs. And then we see eight hours earlier, Rekel just moving into Charlie's room and being like, yes, what? I brought the star projector. So it's like vindication for this. So she finally found someone who appreciated the star projector as much as you Ronnie.
Starting point is 01:30:34 Yeah, thank you. You know, some people make me feel so left out. And Lala's like, I bet the drafts, it's supposed to be fun, and it's supposed to be about you. And it's a two nights in a row that has been about Raquel and her shitty decisions. Because you keep making it about that.
Starting point is 01:30:52 Yeah. Two nights in a row, you've come for Raquel and you failed both nights. Yeah, that's right. It was both the first night Raquel was just sitting eating leftovers in the bed. And Lala, you said, I wouldn't trust you around my man. Second night was like you saying, remember when I said, I wouldn't trust you around my man. Second night was like you saying, remember when I said,
Starting point is 01:31:07 I wouldn't trust you around my man. I mean, that's literally because of Lala. So then Charlie and Raquel wake up downstairs, and Charlie's like, half on one is like karaoke last night, and then we see 13 hours earlier, Charlie, saying the things I hope to never hear in karaoke. Do we have any kid rock fans here tonight? Any kid rock fans in the building?
Starting point is 01:31:28 I'll tell you. Just one that's shocking for Lake Havasu. I'm gonna say that. It's probably because Kid Rock was probably somewhere else at least, like Havasu having a party. So Rick tells like, I feel arrested, but honestly, I feel like I'm not welcome here, and I don't want to stay here.
Starting point is 01:31:45 And Charlie said, yeah, it's like when the town's people would walk into mean people's neighborhoods and they'd be like, shame, thong, same dog. Which is what the most the majority of this cast needs to have that experience walking through a town at this point. Yeah, so it was a good old game of Crohn's reference. So, Rick Hells, I know. And after we came to such a good place in the car ride where I had like a nervous breakdown
Starting point is 01:32:12 and everyone was supportive of me except that lady who wanted to kick me out of the car kind of. She's like, hey, you know, we should do because this definitely will not reinforce the image of me going after other people's guys. Let's crash guys tonight. I feel like they're more my friends than these girls.
Starting point is 01:32:31 And Charlie's like, yeah, let's do it. Okay, let's pack up our stuff and let's rip the bandaid off. Come on, let's make it quick. So they, um, Raquel tells us, I should have known that that I couldn't trust these girls when I overheard them talking shit about me in Vegas. And I would much rather be in LA with my real friends and future secret lovers who actually love me for who I am. So they go to the witches outside and Rikels, like good morning and Christina goes what's up?
Starting point is 01:33:06 And so Rekel's like I wanted to let you know I don't feel comfortable here And I feel like it was a mistake to come on this trip so I picked all my bags and I'm leaving We're meeting up with sheena and Schwartz at the Montreal Rekel you could just Curious and just like no you don't need to see what that said. What is wrong with her? I know. I was like, uh, I literally let out an audible guess.
Starting point is 01:33:31 Like, why, oh, why did you say that part? Why? You just were wrong. And that's, that's the trait that we're learning about Rick Hel, that she just confesses too much. And I'm surprised that she got away with this affair for so long. That's what's so great. We don't know how long it was, but when we find out, I'm going that she got away with this affair for so long. That's what's so great. We don't know how long it was, but when we find out,
Starting point is 01:33:47 I'm still being shocked either way, because she's a confessor. You know, it's like, she gets off on just confessing. It's weird. That's why this whole thing has been wild. Because it's like, as much as it's like shocking for its depravity, it's also shocking that Raquel managed to like hold up her end of the secrecy. Like, it's just how did she do it? Because she just can't quite, she's not good with words and timing, you know? And also it's just like, why did you say that? Like,
Starting point is 01:34:16 you're here defending yourself against accusations that you go after other people's men and then you say, guys, I don't feel comfortable here. So I'm going to go hang other people's men. And then you say, guys, I don't feel comfortable here. So I'm gonna go hang out with your men. You know, it was worth it to see Katie's face, because Katie's face was mortified, right? I think I took it as kind of her being, like when she talked about trying to make out with Tom or whatever, it's almost like I'm admitting it.
Starting point is 01:34:42 So you can't tell me that I was sneaking around later or something. Because I guess she knew she would get in trouble for that. So she's just saying right now, like, we're going to be she and her shorts at the Mondrian, right? So then Katie pulls that face. I died. I had to like rewind it and then keep it on pause. I was laughing so hard. And then Christina, Christina goes, um, that makes sense. I'm Charlie. So what do you mean that makes sense. And Charlie goes,
Starting point is 01:35:05 what do you mean that makes sense, Lit Bomb? Okay, she's not going over there to fuck Tom. And Christina goes, well, at this point, and Charlie goes, yeah, we all know how she asked when she trains. So, Charlie's like,
Starting point is 01:35:21 Charlie's like, I'm surprised Christina Kelly had something to say without Katie's dick in her mouth. I was like, whoa, whoa, Charlie, okay, come on. Let's chill out, Charlie. True though, Christina just came on here to kiss Katie's ass. It's like Katie's the fill in Stasi for Christina.
Starting point is 01:35:38 So she's like, whatever you wanna say, Katie, I'll say Katie, and then putting under the bomb and shit. And so Lala goes, well, I think it's good to cut that you leave. And Raquel goes, Lala, she goes, yeah, you gave me the green light to go ahead with Oliver. It's not even about Oliver. It's about you calling me a mistress again. You were a mistress twice.
Starting point is 01:36:04 So that we know of. mistress again. You were a mistress twice. So we know of. So then this is what's wild. Raquel during this entire thing, Raquel has this like blank expression, which is kind of her, that's her like default. I mean, I have a serious, this is serious expression.
Starting point is 01:36:18 But she's just sort of is like, like her head is kind of tilted, her eyes are wide and she goes, well, I think you're just a little bit angry Like her head is kind of tilted her eyes are wide and she goes well I Think you're just a little bit angry because Oliver did choose me over you and like at the end of the day If he wanted to take you out on the dance floor, he could have done that. It's like whoa The way she just like reads her in this like monotone Empty
Starting point is 01:36:40 Vapid way, it's just like crazy I mean I chaired you, and listen, I already know you guys hate me. Okay. I'm prepared for you guys to hate me, but I cheered in this moment. We're cheering no matter what this no matter what this girl does later. Lala deserved that, you know, and Lala just sits there like looking around, not knowing what to say. And that is now the third time on the trip that they've tried coming for her that somehow Requel wins. She keeps winning. And listen, as a fan of Vanderpump rules,
Starting point is 01:37:10 you've got to see when the witches get beat like that. There's nothing, I mean, it just feels good. It feels good. I agree. So no matter what she did in this episode before she committed any crimes that I know of, she won this one. A broken car is right. A broken, good for you all over a cow.
Starting point is 01:37:25 Two times a day. Fuck you, new Recal. Fuck you, present Recal. But congratulations, past Recal. Yes, yeah. And that's why this show is wild. And that's why this is such in these season one, season two space, because the moral complex
Starting point is 01:37:40 that I'm having watching this show, and who I find myself rooting for, versus who in real life I'm rooting for. I just I don't it's it's very hard to reconcile but that is the fun of Vanderpump rule. Now we've been wrong so many times on this show. This is one of those where you really don't know what's gonna happen a lot of the times. Most of these shows are so predictable but this one has shocked me so many times like the the Kristen and Jack stuff, I remember just being completely shocked. Yeah, I thought that was all, I thought that was just Stasi, um, you know, whatever. I will say the other thing that we really haven't talked about that regardless of of what side we're on with all this, the amount of foreshadowing
Starting point is 01:38:19 for what later comes out is, is like through the roof in this episode. It is really so, it is so crazy, you know? So, so then they basically Charlie and Rick Hell walk out and Charlie's like a lip balm girl, don't bring her anywhere where they're dry as hair. I'm like, okay, Charlie. I like what they leave. They close the sliding glass door and Mama's like literally sitting there
Starting point is 01:38:42 as the kids would say, gagaing, she's got. And so they leave and they close the sliding glass door and recalps double flips them off. And she's like, stupid. And then they leave. I think Christina is like, I'm sorry. Charlie has so much to do with this. Like Katie, I think you need to reevaluate that friendship,
Starting point is 01:39:03 which is funny to think that Katie is really friends with Charlie. Katie, it's not friends with anybody, Kristy, that's the point. She has no friends. She's got this, what do you call it when two people team up to, she's got an ally in Lala, but I doubt those two are literally calling each other every day and enjoying each other's company. You know, I could be wrong. But, yeah.
Starting point is 01:39:26 So, Lala's like, yeah, and I know she's your girl, Katie, but like, she gets a really bad advice. Those are two really low vibration human beings. So I mean, on a show where, like, I don't know what what I don't know what an example is of something that has low vibrations, but this show is the lowest vibrations. So Katie, they do again, they have this moment where Christine is like, guys, let's try to have fun. And Molly goes, I don't even need to try. I'm like totally having fun. Oliver totally chose me in the first place. And Christine is like, well, we're gonna go on a boat and then we're gonna have a bomb ass day. I was like, oh my God, that is so like a mom saying that.
Starting point is 01:40:09 I know. Guys, the lake is gonna be bomb.com. Yeah, let's be Audi 5000 with this dust deal, Airbnb, so we can have a bomb ass day in this beautiful overcast lake Havasu skies. It's going to be lit. So then they go to the lake and Katie arrives in her Stevie Mech's poncho thing
Starting point is 01:40:33 and Kristen is in a white pant suit. What a wreck of a girl's trip this is. It cannot be stressed enough, okay? So then Christina gets there and she goes, this is sick. They have like a little sort of like pontoon, like a rented pontoon in a small docks lip. They're like right next to some random guys
Starting point is 01:40:54 having a birthday party or whatever. And so they're just like drinking the sun's not out. They're just dropping in the lake water and Lala goes, Lauren from Utah knows exactly how to go to a lake party like this. I'm gonna show these bitches what's up and they just like, they jump in the water as well. She goes, whoa, there's boys, do we like this?
Starting point is 01:41:17 Katie goes, yeah. Just hilarious. And then they start like talking to this group of homely guys that's next to them. And Mala's like, Hey, are you guys celebrating some of the birth desk? And they're like, my homeboy is getting married. And she goes, and this homegirl is getting divorced. So they all cheer. And that's all they get. Is this like weird bachelor party of wasted dudes next to them? And it's sad. And then they're playing a song about drinking and parting.
Starting point is 01:41:46 And it's just a really awkward, like they're trying, they're taking shots of these guys who are just gross and Katie looks miserable. And they're taking the footage of their day, which is basically floating on one floaty, taking out a wave runner, and taking shots with these guys. And they just keep showing shots of one of those things and switching it over and over again,
Starting point is 01:42:06 playing under a song that says drinking and parting, drinking and parting over and over, but it just looks so sad and miserable, LOL. I know, I actually wanted it to be a good party because despite everything, I still feel like Katie deserves to celebrate leaving Tom Schwartz, you know? Like I feel like I deserves to celebrate leaving Tom Schwartz. You know, like I feel like I feel like I'm still despite
Starting point is 01:42:27 everything fully on her side and fully support this decision. And I want her to have this like post Tom Schwartz fabulous life where she can be fun and like have this great sexy wild time. And I'm like, oh, just like a sad boat slip and like have a seal on an overcast day. Yeah, well, not today, man. I'm sorry, but not today. I'm going to work towards that today.
Starting point is 01:42:52 So then we go to Schwartz and Sandeys and it's like a tasting night and we meet Greg's wife, Lelaine. Yeah, no relation to Jack. And she has a basket of stuff. She's like, there's some lemons There's some rosemary. I know you like fresh things Yeah, so shorts and I'm sorry, a sand of all on Ariana walking and sand of all is like dude You know, it could be stressful at times walking the shorts and sand is because like you don't know what Greg is what Greg
Starting point is 01:43:23 You're gonna get are you gonna get the positive happy Greg the everything sucks and what are you guys doing Greg or you might just find Be a situation where someone pickers out about the affair you're having behind your loving girlfriend's back. Yeah So then they're chasing different green goddess dressings and The guy who's cooking is like this is a salad, it's got plants and herbs and some avocado. It's like, okay, so. It was not a convincing display, like the ceviche. They're really trying to get the ceviche off the ground. We saw them at the Daily Mail party, the shorts was pushing it, there were
Starting point is 01:44:00 no takers, and now we really got to see it and it looked like some supermarket bread that they just toasted up and just piled old raw tuna on top of. It was not a great advertisement for this establishment. Hey, what's in this salad? Plants. Okay, great, thank you. I will be returning. So Santa falls like, well, yeah, we're only gonna have 18 items on the menu. So everyone has to be a banger.
Starting point is 01:44:29 Wait, did I say banger? I'm not banger. I'm not banger. Who's banger? I don't know what you're talking about, bro. Okay. I feel like 18 items is a lot for a bar. Right.
Starting point is 01:44:38 I feel like you could probably get away with nine items, nine or 10, right? Three or four smalls. Well, appetizers, entrees, desserts, so... But it's now like a restaurant. I feel like, yeah. Yes, a restaurant. So I think they should just keep it as a bar. That's where they're going wrong. I don't know. I'm not in this industry. So anyway, whatever, I'm never going to that place. So now we go back to Lake Havasu and
Starting point is 01:45:05 Lala and... Unless, it, unless Ariana realizes that since her name was on that lease, that's half of her restaurant and she goes in there and convinces Greg that she's the better partner and gets rid of Tom Sandevol. That's my advice to her. You now have equity in this restaurant. Well, she's in a common law marriage with this guy. So she owns half of what he has, and he used her home to put up to pay for this restaurant. So I would say that there could be an argument if you get a good enough lawyer that you own part of that restaurant. You put up the money and part of that restaurant to yours.
Starting point is 01:45:38 And if Greg has the ultimate say, it wouldn't be a bad idea for you to approach Greg and pitch yourself as someone who's going to run this restaurant and add a few really good sandwiches on there Greg's pissed off about all of the scant of all shit so maybe he could you know rework the publicity and make it mamas like someone I saw someone online Suggesting the the name mamas. I didn't come up with that but Maloney's and Maddox, you know Maloney and Maddox Mama doing but Malone's and Maddox, you know, Malone and Maddox, mama. Do it. Steal the name from the internet like I just did, and go get that restaurant back, okay? That's the ending I need to this story.
Starting point is 01:46:11 Yeah, well, I guess we'll see. So then we're back in Lake Havasu and Lala and Christina are, they bring Katie to the backyard because they've put up the sand of all, not the sand of all, the shorts, pinata, so Katie starts hitting it, she starts wailing at it and decapitated and DeKilla falls out and condoms in a vibrator. And Katie tells us, this is, you know,
Starting point is 01:46:32 dreams do come true. I've always wanted to beat the shit out of Schwartz. I'm like, well, you know, sure a lot of other people have to. So, and then she said, I just wanna know if the opposite of this had happened the fallout. If Katie, if Tom Schwartz had a divorce party and they had a doll in a Stevie
Starting point is 01:46:52 Dicks, like cover up, you know, come out that Tom beat the shit out of and cheered divorcing Katie, it would be World War three over there. Okay. Oh, yeah, it would be a, it would be, it Oh yeah, it would be a dessert. It would be, it would not go well. Cool. So, and then she's like, you know what's so fucked up? You probably would love this, which is so annoying, which it's probably true.
Starting point is 01:47:16 Like of course Tom Schwartz would ruin the pinata moment. So Lala is like, I know right now, you're not looking for relationships, but when you do think, when do you think that time comes? Like what would you, what would you want? And basically Katie's like, I just want someone who likes me and appreciates me and supports me and listens to me and actually wants to be with me
Starting point is 01:47:39 rather than hanging out with a bunch of LED lights and Tom Sandeval. Like I just want someone who wants to answer my questions, you know? Yeah, and you deserve that actually, ma'am. She does. So then Lala, Lala's like, just don't not crank. So I know. Cool and okay, but are there moments you miss with Tom?
Starting point is 01:47:58 And she's like, yeah, I miss a lot of things. Of course I do. And Christina's like, yeah, 12 years is a long time and then boom. Instead, nothing left gone forever. Wow. Hope there's an afterlife and Katie's like And Christina's like yeah, cuz like you're losing a best friend as well as I have spend And that's just your song should play your wedding song You could play like three times in a row. Hey, I brought the wedding video. Do you want to watch it again?
Starting point is 01:48:27 Uh, she's like, I'm going to get like a dish towel with the saying on it since it is Wednesday. And we can all stand together at sunset. Remember how Katie lost so much on this day. And Katie's crying and she goes, yeah, and it's not easy. And that's why I tell people to be supportive and not get involved. Anyway, I don't want to bring this down. It was never up.
Starting point is 01:48:50 Okay, it was never up, ma'am. So now we go over to Skybar. And now we have Schwartz. The Schwartz and Sandy mat the bartender, the bartender, the bartender who drank on the job, and Brett is still traumatized. He's like walking around the sky bar. Like look at all the things they do, right?
Starting point is 01:49:11 Look at all the things we still have to do. And Schwartz is like, guys, this is not a divorce party. Dude, it's a divorce get together. And then Matt, this is the trait we've learned that Matt has. He lost too hard at everything to fit in. He's like, ha ha ha bra. Ha ha ha ha. Yes, yes that was good.
Starting point is 01:49:33 Like Matt, calm down Matt. Okay. So, little aside joke, Matt. Yeah. So, he really is trying hard to make his mark here, you know. He's like, to the Schwarzeneder. And Schwar's is like, oh, well, that's funny. No one's ever called me that, but that's new.
Starting point is 01:49:49 We could use it. Guys, let's like, you're Schwarzeneder, just to make Matt feel welcome, okay, guys? Oh, you know, if Katie were here, she'd be like, ew, yeah, she's like, well, she's not. She's in Havasu with two people. Do you know that the two of them ended up leaving like Havasu? Ha, ha, ha, ha. So Katie doesn't have any friends. She's got like two girls on a divorce trip and Schwartz has like 10 guys here brawling for him.
Starting point is 01:50:13 Best of the party. Katy sounds just like a sad get together. Like like enchilada free zone. It's like I bancha tortillas with nothing in them at all. So, so then James is like, well Lala called me this morning and she was like, I had to give it to you, X last night. Yeah, yeah, yeah everyone. You know, because honestly it does not surprise me that this trip is complete shit disaster. I feel like Lala has been very nice to her hair, but she doesn't like her hair. And if you know her hair, does one thing that overst to Raquel, but she doesn't like Raquel. And if you know Raquel does one thing that over steps on the alpha, it's guys you're from the restaurant industry You know what I mean?
Starting point is 01:51:06 Like you're trying to sell the fact that you're from the restaurant industry make an effort Yeah, seriously, so then Back to have a suit now the girls go to place called BJ's Cabana Bar And there's like someone dressed like a horse on the dance floor and it's just like a cowboy bar, you know And so Lala's like, we are not an always anymore. Okay, this is America. So they're all cheering and looking for some cute boys. And it's just like a bunch of like strange middle-aged men dancing on the dance floor, waiting for Kid Rock to show up. They did find some really odd men to be on this episode.
Starting point is 01:51:46 Wow. It's true. So, Christina, to us here, love you guys. You know, this is going to be a real good ending to this trip. I feel it, guys. So, does anybody see any cute boys? And Katie's like, oh, no. Not even one.
Starting point is 01:52:01 What about that one with, like, Mohawk spikes in this 50s? That one over there looks like he ran for for office as a right in candidate. What about him? And she's like, Oh, no, Lala goes, Oh, no, this guy's way more my vibe. So she picks these two hot guys and follows them. She, well, Well, first you just looking after them. And Katie goes, oh my god, La La Bucket Hat, right? I knew it, La La Bucket Hat. Yeah, I'm tingling in all the right places. The vagina is leading the pack.
Starting point is 01:52:35 No one touched my vagina. My vagina's horny. And it's wet and it's been wet. And it wants the wet vaginas find hot guys. Because that's what my vagina is going to do. It's going to snatch you all up because my vagina vaginas gonna do. It's gonna snatch you all up, because my vaginas ready for it's a quick edge. So, I was like, hey, so like, where I have to know,
Starting point is 01:52:52 like where are you guys from? Okay, because I'm from LA, and they're like, oh yeah, we're from LA too. I'm new at, come to our table, okay? Not to be like high school or anything, but like, this is a cool table. So, the guys sit down, and then they're just like like talking and the bucket hat guy who's like really hot. He's like, yeah, live in Palm Springs. Oh yeah, you ever come to like West Hollywood? Yeah, I go
Starting point is 01:53:12 to the Abbey a lot. I was like, uh, Lala, you may be. Lala just strikes out every single time. Lala can not, she's just striking on every single time. Palm Springs goes to the Aviolog. Hello, and she doesn't even get it. She's like, oh my God, you guys, he makes me so nervous. And he's like, you're like a young, marital street. Oh my God, we have so much chemistry. So now we go back to guys night. And she was like, I don't want to get too fast because
Starting point is 01:53:48 like I don't want to turn in. Oh, no, this is short because I don't want to get too sauce because I don't want to turn into the short to Nader. That was for you, Matt. You're probably going to. I invented that. I invented that. I invented that. I invented that. I invented that. I invented that.
Starting point is 01:54:10 So then Charlie and Raquel, they show up and everyone's like, oh, and everyone's like, you know, oh, oh, shit, oh my God, I can't believe I'm here. Whoa, why do I have an erection right now? And James starts playing with this here. He's like, oh my God, Ali's gonna kill me. And he's like, well, I guess guys not means nothing. And so Raquel skews in next to Schwartz, and the music gets like, hilsy, you know, like from the hills. It's like very lagoon at each. And then everybody's moving in slow motion.
Starting point is 01:54:38 And then it ends to be continued. T-TBC-Y. What a disaster. What a disaster. What is this? What is this show? This is wild. So yeah, according to that podcast we talked about earlier, this is the night that it all started to go down. Yeah. We'll see. We shall see. Anyway, thanks for, uh, thanks for listening and watching Venture rage at us at the show whoever you want to vent it at come join us on Instagram and patreon et cetera and Then also keep your rage for Denver because we'll be doing the show in Denver next week So we'll see you then and we'll catch you on the next episode everyone
Starting point is 01:55:21 Bye watch what crap ends would like to think it's premium sponsors! Ain't no thing like Allison King. Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney! Kristi, our de-dourty! Dana C. Dana Dew! She's not just a Sheila, she's a Daniella. Itch-o-s!
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Starting point is 01:56:19 Don't get salty with Christine Pepper. Better do what she says is Elva Enriquez. Can't have a meal without the Emily sides. Under your fasteners, it's Erin Casner. Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall. She's not harsh, she's Jill Hirsch. We will, we will, Joanna Rocklandu, my favorite Murto. Karen McMurdo.
Starting point is 01:56:40 We love him madly, it's Kyle Podd Chadley. Let's go on a bender with Lauren Fender. She's a good hobby, it's Lauren Hobgad. We want to hang with Liz Lang. The incredible edible Matthewsisters. Nancy C. C. Sinto. Give him hell, Miss Noel. She's the Queen Bee, it's Sarah Lemke.
Starting point is 01:57:00 Shannon out of a cannon Anthony. Let's take off with Tamla Plane. She ain't no shrinking Violet Coo-Tar! Hey Prime members, you can listen to Watcher Crappens add free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen add free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts, before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey. Celebrity Beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court.
Starting point is 01:57:31 I'm Matt Bellasife. And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the host of Wondry's new podcast, Disantel. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud from the buildup, why it happened, and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feuds say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows.
Starting point is 01:57:58 It's snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon music or Wondria. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, someday, parenting is unbearable.
Starting point is 01:58:33 I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful take on parenting. Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brownleur, we will be your resident, not so expert experts. Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding, and thinking. Oh yeah, I have absolutely been there. We'll talk about what went right and wrong. What would we do differently?
Starting point is 01:59:01 And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone. So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app.

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