Watch What Crappens - PumpRules: The Mamas and the Tapas

Episode Date: November 11, 2021

Vandeprump Rules gives Charli tapas, the Toms some Phillips Hues lights and Raquel the possibility of a new nose. Find all of our premium bonus episodes at https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens, and get tickets for our Winter Tour at https://www.watchwhatcrappens.com/10th-anniversary-hunky-dory-tourSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to watch what crap ends at free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music around, you can't swap. I think it's not there so much that's happened. Hello, and welcome to Watch What Happens. The podcast for all that crap we love to talk about on Heel Braves. I'm Ronnie, guess he's with me.

It's cute, thin, adorable, freshly shaved, and very pink today. Mr. Ben Mantelke. Hello, Psyling. Hi, how are you? I'm a vision of pinkiness. I'm just so pink. It's an honor of Lisa Vanderpump.

I was like, let me dress like an English rose. I'll be pink, pink, I say. Um, yes, it's Vanderpump rules day-to-day here on the show. A couple things first. I'll make them quick, okay, because I love a quick shell. First, we're on Crappin's On Demand demand. So hi, we're on video. If you want videos go to patreon.com slash watch crap and sign up on the crap and it's demand on demand level. Okay. Also, we are on tour starting in January in New

York City, but we're going to tons of city. So go get your tickets at watch what crap and it's calm. January is our 10th anniversary show at Town Hall in New York. It's for the golden crappie awards. So go get tickets for that. We're super excited to come out on the road. We also do a show called Take a Seat now on the Green Room app, which is by Spotify. So download that. That's a live show.

We do every Monday night, 7pm Pacific, 10pm Eastern. You guys talk back to us, you chat with each other. We talk. It's not a recap show. We just talk a bunch of crap. And go buy this cookbook. Buy Amy Phillips and Chef Steward O'Keefe, okay? Forward by Andy Gowlin.

Every recipe asks you, hey, did you get new boobs? Before you cook it, it's called cook it spill it and throw it to not so real housewives parody cookbook Authorized by Amy so I just got my copy today in the mail So I'm just gonna open a page and cook some shit. Maybe some blueberry muffins from Mimi. Okay. There you go guys So that's it then Okay, um Ronnie I have to say there was some sort of internet thing. And I don't know what's going on. But you are about five.

I hear your audio in real life, but I'm seeing your video. Five second delay. Well, I'm still seeing my video. I'm going to start over. Or do you want to just commit your idea? I say we just go because I'm looking. Yeah, I'm looking fine to me. So I think you're just, you just caught up.

You just caught up. Yeah, I think that sounds like somebody has their Safari open and his name rhymes with men and starts to be someone is playing solitarism shit, got his drop box open, looking at the Twitter, okay? I know what you do over there. I don't need to have an inside to your screen to know what you're doing over there, sir, okay? Well, what you do over there. I don't need to have an inside to your screen to know what you're doing over there, sir. Okay.

Well, yes. I'm looking at Hornhub. Well, as we speak, watching Hornhub, because nothing gets me honoured in the Lisa Vanderpump. So it's got to pump in her name. It's true. So this is a very exciting episode of Vanderpump Rules Rules because there was, like, this season's been very strong with the Broken Bird stuff. I think that may be elevating Requel to, like, this new prominent role on the show has really up to Broken Birdingness, and then Lala has really, you know, leaned into some Broken Bird stuff. So we're getting a lot of Lisa Vanderpump absorbing Broken Bird energy face, which I don't know if we've ever really talked about this,

but when Lisa Vanderpump encounters someone who is a broken bird, she gives this face, that's like, like her mouse sort of like hangs open. And then like if she's really digging the broken bird, if she's really feeding off the energy, she closes her mouth and crinkles up her chin, she goes, broken for if she's really feeding off the energy, she closes her mouth and crinkles up our change goes. She has been doing a pulled back face frown look a lot. And I'm not sure if it's just how the filters are sitting or you know whatever it is. She's just trying to

look interested because usually she comes and she's like really interested and now she's just kind of spouting off her lines like darling you're in my house again. All right. So we're talking about possible abuse abuse James watch your temper It's like um, ma'am. Is this an abuse storyline or is it not because Rikkel is acting like it's an abuse storyline and Vannar pumps over there Just throwing out zingers like oh James is so funny with his possible abuse You know, it's like what the hell's going on here? And I thought about it and I think maybe she's just like so casual because she's just been on TV for so long and she's probably just tying her she probably just wants to relax okay yeah yeah she's had a very hard life in

Villa Rosa so very difficult there that's a lot of animal shit you know I know she makes it look easy but you know she's got a lot of employees to you I'm sure but constantly being in the smell of just shit and not just like dog shit or human shit But all kinds of shit. There's all kinds of shit over there. Okay, that she has to and can you know she's sleeping next to a shit bag named Ken you know that he's just a leaky siff Mm-hmm. Yeah, he's just like one big leaky siff by the way running one point out I have a zit on my nose. I love what's happening. Stop staring at yourself, while your Dropbox is loading

and you're breathing Twitter while we're trying to do it. My Dropbox is not loading, it's on pause, sir. So the episode starts off with a tricky monocle song. Great, just a good sort of like classic style, tricky monocle, a good throwback to her origins. And it goes like this, Come watch me do it because we're not do it. I only do it under the neon lights. Um, it's a weird place to do it. You know, whatever it is she is doing. Why is she doing it under any

on light? And maybe she's a CSI investigator. Maybe it's Mark Helgenberger all the time. We just realized that's a Mark Helgenberger song. I only do it under the neon lights, you know, look for blood spatter. Yeah. So then we see Tom and Brock and James, they're all playing basketball. And I kind of felt back. So I was like, oh, another scene with them wearing wigs. And then I realized, no, I literally thought that. I was like, Oh, actually, I actually brox's hair beautiful beautiful hair, but I I just sort of had a natural

reaction to the long hair as like oh boys with long hair What what here is this And I thought it was like very poetic that they're playing basketball at some sort of youth center. I was like wow the links this cast will go to To recapture their use the go to the center We'll give it back to us so then we see Arianna and Charlie having coffee and Charlie is

Really weird on on TV. I'm not really sure what's going on with Charlie, but she chooses a different demeanor for each scene. And this one she's just like really happy and has never been to a coffee shop before. And she's just like, hi, you know what? I think I'm going to do the black coffee. Yeah, they're getting Benye's and everything. So while she's doing that, we then we go. Well, she can't get a Benye, you know, because that's her big storyline. And she's only eating pizza her whole life. So this is like a huge deal. She's going for Benye's and she's like, you know what?

I'm going to try a Benye. Where's my fucking storyline? Where's my metal? I've been eating shit my whole life. You know, nobody's ever throwing me a party for it. Yeah, also, I mean like I I do respect the Charlie has food issues, although I think the Ben Yay like you know, I'm not gonna I don't know if I'm necessarily going to be like give a round of applause for deciding to like climb the

insurmountable mountain that is trying to be a Benay like climb the insurmountable mountain that is trying up in the Benye. Like a delicious breaded item. That's fried again. I'm like, if you like pizza, you're probably gonna like a Benye. Like if it was something like she went from a bent, like from pizza to, you know,

like caviar or like gooey duck or something, like okay, that's a pretty big move. But to go to Benye, it's a little bit of a lateral move for me. So I will withhold my applause until later. Well, I'll withhold the cheek. So I'm sick of them being called Benye's. They should be called Ron Yees.

Life isn't fair, and I don't appreciate it. Why do you get all the good things? There's nothing named after me. There's like Ron Delay cheese, which is fucking lame and everybody knows it. What about I'm gonna think about this. I know that there's a good good like Ron. There's a good Ronnie Macaroni and macaroni and cheese. Hello. That's true. That's you know what I'm really you. You just actually made my day better You're literally in the like I have been I have like something that's delicious

my day better. You're literally in the like I have been I have like something that's delicious, but kind of like a regionally specific and yours is like universally love. You're right. Different forms. And you also make a big version of that Macaroni caram and she's you just solved my own food name issues. Thank you. It's about it's a breakthrough episode for all of us. Okay. So then we go to Schwartz, um, who is still playing basketball and he like, does he do a chest bump with Brock and it's like a, it's like a check. He like tries to do like a check with his chest against Brock, which no frail man should ever do because it's, it's like throwing yourself in front of a Mack truck, essentially. I was like, oh, oh, oh, Australian Baba, you hurt me.

Yeah. And then he like does a jump, but then falls on his face. So obviously, in other words, James and Brock Quinn. So they all sit down and talk and shorts is like, wow, you know, this was really nice because like, I didn't think about one thing outside this game the entire time. And Brock's like, listen, Olaisol was short, his face and Olaisol was screaming at me. What a worse. The burn didn't want memory forever. How you're like a stone. And so then there are the Brock's like, what's going

on with you? And so, uh, Santa telling them that they have like we have a deadline for Friday and it's like we need to have a mission statement and then we're gonna have like a brainstorm so we have like a deep dive on what we're gonna do. We're gonna do that this week. So sort of setting up this like scene they'll be having later. Just what the audience requested. More Tom scenes in Phillips use lighting okay. Just what we all fucking needed. Thanks guys. So then they start talking about the party at Vanderpump's or the the water. Yeah, Janice is wasting away. How is the tasting? And so Tom's works like, oh, it was really intense.

Like Brock's chest. Oh, I got hurt by the tasting. I got hurt by the memory in the chest. Oh, that memory hurt my nipple. So, San was like, well, over the years, Lala's come after people, but you're not allowed to bring up personal stuff with her. Like, yeah, of course, I've heard weird rumors about Randall, but I'm not going to bring them up you know so it's sort of like teetering in this Camille grammar space right now which I appreciate. Yeah, she is in the house wise I can bring up your shit too lady okay. He tells us oh I've gotten DMs about that relationship but like we've never been able to know anything beyond

surface level about Lala. What do you think is beyond surface level about Lala? She thinks two puck lives inside of her. Okay. And she wears a t-shirt with her own face on it. Now, the second part I do as well. Okay. But I'm not saying that there's much pastive surface level with me either. So my question remains the same.

No, there's a lot more to you, Ronnie, than there is to Lala. I'm sorry to say. That's a nice one. I mean, what are you trying to marry me today? What the hell? I mean, Ronnie, last time I checked, like, you're part of macaroni and cheese. And what is she part of? Part of Fala Lala.

So that is a popular song, although it's royalty free at this point, because it's been out for so long. You're an old Chris. I'm a song for Fala. For Fala. Lala. Oh, no, you're not giving her a pasta on this. Okay. Now you're trying to get it to for us today. You give me macaroni and cheese to give her a far,

a lot. She has to attach herself to even get to be part of far, far, a lot because there's not even a second law on far, far, far, far, a try to say and that's so law, a lot that's so Lala to try to attach herself onto like the bow tie pasta because like that's like the most you said, Andrew Pompasta, obviously, because it is. It is. It really is. Lala to try to attach herself onto like the bow tie pasta because like that's like the most you said Vanderpump pasta obviously

Because it really is so James is like I'm doing the softest thing of seeing next Tuesday this week is coming balls and Sandin was like I just don't want to be awkward. It's gonna be you're going to a place you used to all wait tables on a night called Cut fitness, okay, it's good. It's gonna be awkward to you're going to a place you used to all wait tables on a night called Cut Fitness. It's going to be awkward to watch James, the white guy do terrible, easy ass wraps. It's awkward no matter how you splice it. Also, gosh, four or five seasons in, still trying to make see you next Tuesday happen at Sir. It's not going to happen, guys.

I'm sorry. It's not, it's not gonna happen guys, I'm sorry, it's not gonna happen. So James is like, he thinks that like everything has to be sorted out between Sandeval and Mala and Sandeval's life. Well the other night didn't go so great, so maybe we should have a nice constructive conversation which we know is never gonna happen between the two of them. So back to the Bidney A place, Charlie is talking about how she's working at Sir later. And she needs my need to move in because she's moving it with Corey, her

boyfriend, and she tells us about Corey. She's like, yeah, with Corey, like I've known, I know I'm like with Corey, but it's like different because like I've been with Corey, but like we haven't been like in our own place. So like we're going to have our own place, which is different than being together at like his place. So it's going to be different because we're together, but now we're going to be together like in a different place.

Yeah. I'm getting a playboy and like, I mean, look at him. He's a tall dude with tattoos and he's good looking and he has good style. I mean, no personality that we can see, but he's got those things, right? Imagine it didn't happen. I mean, who hasn't he fought? Right. We're all looking for different things in men, but who wants a boyfriend that you're like, wow, who hasn't he fought in West Hollywood? I'm like, I don't think we want like a faux Pete Davidson, right? Like, I don't think we want like a faux pea Davidson, right? Like I don't think we want pea Davidson to begin with, right? So it just sounds like a lot of scabs.

So Charlie is like, wow, you know, here's something that's really good, like being with Corey, I've like tried so much food. Like it's gotten so much better. And Arianna's like, wow, you're trying food. You have a life of so many first ahead of you. And I really like how bored Arianna is trying food. You have a life of so many first ahead of you. And I really like how bored Ariana is in this whole scene. She's like, I have a fucking Benye in front of me

and I'm still not happy. I think she was just in it for the Benye's. I think she's just like, mm-hmm, I'm gonna nod and just sort of say simple things to you. Just let me have my Benye, right? And so Charlie's like, I can't sit behind these eating issues. Like I can't have this cloud over my head. And Arianna's like, yeah, so well,

when you put yourself, something of yourself out there, like that, now we share that, and you don't have to hold that on your own. Is that good enough? Can I have my bin yay in it now? Have I said enough words to make my check for the week? That sounds nice, right? Right.

And Charlie tells this for so many years, I just ate the same thing. Pizza, peanut butter, jelly, quesadillas. I just need more specifics because to me, this sounds like normal life. So I'm like, what the hell? Should I be suing my parents? Because this is what I was taught to eat

and obviously look at me, it's still what I eat. This is all the food groups, she just named. So to me, it sounds great, you know? Yeah, I mean, I support it. She goes and she goes, but Corey was like, absolutely not. And so you draw a thing she's gonna say, he was like, we are going to like help you get through this,

yada yada, but she goes, no, we're not eating the same fucking thing every single day. So that's what Corey's response was was like it's about me right? Well he is on Vanderprop rules. Exactly. So she's like oh my god and now I'm like trying so many new things and I'm like so vulnerable. It's bachelor's week bachelor's week needs to get the fuck off of Bravo. I'm going fucking crazy with the vulnerable and the walls down bullshit. Okay. You're eating something other than pizza for a day. Okay. This is not the bachelor.

Ben Yees are powerful, man. You know, that's true. That's a lot. I mean, think back to your first, Ben Yee. You know, I can. And I can, I, it was it's life changing. So yeah, she's crying and learning how to be vulnerable and Ariana tells us you know everyone in this group is like messed up Like you might as well be like here's what's fucked up about me like I'm fucking into the sketch comedy like that's my issue So get into it or get the fuck out that was in prop also part of sketch comedy. I'm like really good at it So Charlie's like we could do a culinary night, like top-as, and then everyone can bring food and like try it. Oh my god. Yeah. And she's like thanks for the free therapy. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crap-ins comer. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life.

But come on, someday, parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful take on parenting. Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brown-Oller, we will be your resident not so expert experts. Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding and thinking. Oh yeah, I have absolutely been there. We'll talk about what went right and wrong.

What would we do differently? And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone. So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. So then we go to LVP's home and Rekal comes over and she's you know doing the how do you feel differently now that you're an engaged woman? Yeah, and she's like

Lisa then Lisa looks at her like looks at her ring and is like well Raquel's got a good starter diamond The one I've started with was like a little an epic, but then I started housekeeping and cooking and cut my seat track, baby. And I'm around with this giant ring. I'm like, I don't know if that's gonna be the trajectory for James and Raquel necessarily. Yeah, I still think that thing is fake. And I think he has the confidence in knowing

that she's never gonna get it checked, but I don't believe that for a second I don't believe his mom would let him spend that much money. His mom would take that money, you know, there's something fishy there So Vanderprom's like, well, I've called my friend who's a world renowned plastic surgeon From e-television So it's Paul of course Yeah, and Paul, you know, love Paul. Paul's great, really hard to watch Paul without Adrian because the best thing about Paul

is his wife standing behind him going, stupid, you're an idiot. God damn it, moron, dumbass. What do you think you can fix in those stupid? I know, I really want Adrian to be like working in a front office, like sort of like on secrets and wives. How they were at the plastic surgeon on that show, but then one of the wives was like working and like made everyone wear blazers. I just want Adrian to do. I want I want that kind

of energy in his office. Yeah, but she's the X-Wive so it wouldn't work. I think now he has like a really nice loving wife, which was the point. I don't want to want you on my TV. Go away with your to that. So Lisa's like, well, I think that this poor girl paid $16,000 for it. And goes, well, I'm a lot more than that. How much? Well, probably double that. So we have to understand this girl. They took the bandages off and then she couldn't do math. If any kind of give speeches, also her nose was crooked. Darling, can you fix that, Paul? Her nose was one millimeter crooked, and now none of us can look at her.

It's terrible. Please fix this for all of us. Bring it in, I will straighten her boobs. Paul, come on darling. I mean, by the way, they're clearly setting up a moment where Lisa says, Reckhann, you don't have to pay a thing. It's on me.

Like they're clearly setting up a Lisa being a wonderful benefactor scene for next episode, right? Well, they better. I mean, what the hell? You make this kid go to the most expensive plastic surgeon probably ever. No. That's anti gets TV time.

I mean, everybody else gets free weddings for this shit. She better get a free nose. Yeah, no, there's no way they're gonna charge for Cal, $32,000 for Paul and the C, but literally like one of the top plastic surgeons. So, at least it's gonna take Rick out of the palm and she's like, oh, you okay. Is there anything broken, Bops about you, my little bird?

Cause I've read your tweet, something wrong. And Rick has like, there's something I want to tell you. There's more to the story. It's like, why you shaking brookal. Proceed up, bring out the broken bird. Let's up. Hold on, let me get into my energy feeding chair. Okay, I'm ready to receive all of your broken bird energy. Fill me up, Rick. Oh, bird status scope stat. Girl, I'm listening. I'm listening. Why are you shaking? Can you shake some? Oh, this is wonderful. She's shaking. I'm only shake that hard on my birthday and Christmas. Get it!

Alright, it was the wrong time for that broken bird, alright. The bird thermometer stats. Alright, here we go. So she's like, well, am I having a panic attack because I really didn't want to tell anybody this. It's so good! Panic attacks, it's so good, Raquel! Keep going! Uh, James bumped my nose. When we got her, I got the cast off and she's like, what do you mean, bumped your nose? She's like, well, you and me really are and fast for a kiss. What kind of kiss is this? That doesn't make any sense.

This kiss, this kiss, oh enough with that song. Just tell me. Well, he went so hard. Has anybody hit you? Because hit me. Like she asked me, as if it gets a crazy question. And then Raquel tells us, I know it doesn't look great. But James has created a reputation for himself and he has a history of blowing up on people. I'm like, yes, Raquel, that's why we're all like, please get out of this relationship. What are you doing with him? He has created that reputation and you're willing to sort of engage with that. Why? Why? Yeah, and then we see a clip of James' greatest hits, 2015. You're a fucking slug slut. You're fuck everyone at Cirque du Starrin. And 2017,

your trash, you pathetic stupid fucking whore. 2018. Fuck everyone. Like geez, James. Yeah, it's charming. So, Rick Helst, like, she's like, I just didn't want people to jump to conclusions. So, then she tells Lisa that actually what had happened. James's entire family was there.

They all saw it. They can vouch for it. And Lisa's, I believe you. I believe you. I believe you. And so, then, you, I believe you, I believe you. And so then I believe you, I believe you, please don't make me shoot a scene with his mother Jacqueline. She's an awful person.

I'll take your word for it. Not another scene, please. Sorry, Kell goes, so yeah, it happened. And then I looked at James's mom and said, is it okay? And she said, it looked like my nose was touching my cheek. Like, what I mean, how evil is James' mom? And she's trying to be so nice these days. That is such a mean thing to say to someone.

Like how, like, because it doesn't look like that at all, by the way. It's also so typical that she was with James' mom when this happened and no one thought to take her to the hospital or the doctor. Her nose is on her cheek. And of course, Jack was like, oh my God, don't tell on James. Get the fuck out of this family, they're terrible people.

And why did James come into that fast? That is a good question. I mean, that's not like, that's crazy that he would just, unless it was like one of these things, if it were one of these things, where they both turned to each other at the same time and as a boom, you know, but then that would be the story

that we both turned to each other and there was that. But if he came in for a kiss super aggressively, I mean, I mean, I can see that. It just looks, it's just sounding like she's describing some kind of abuse and it's just really uncomfortable because it's like she said, he's built that reputation for himself, but even just seeing how he's acting right now in this episode, like it's like she said, he's built that reputation for himself, but even just seeing how he's acting right now in this episode. Like, it's very plausible. So having her set it up like that is just weird.

I don't like any of this. So she tells, she's telling her, James, then James flipped out and he knew he fucked up and he felt so terrible. Which sounds like what? What happens after abuse, right? So, and then he took it out on his mom and I felt really bad for her. And she's like, well, you abuse, right? So, and then he took it out on his mom and I felt really bad for her.

And she's like, well, you know, why? Because she said it doesn't look okay. She goes, no, like he was walking back and forth in the fetal position over and over screaming, don't let her be ugly, mommy. Please don't let her be ugly. I can't be with an ugly girl, mommy. This needs to be some cause for concern

because again, James is raging. I mean he's improved But he's not there yet, you know, and then she says I wish you would told me before because I feel like an idiot saying the Knows is going at this angle now you tell me it's something different. I'm like, oh, I mean like why is Lies I feel like who, who cares how it happened, and then those are still the same. This whole thing is crazy of like, why is Lisa, Paul, Paul's not gonna know that was from a rushed kiss.

He's the most populous surgeon in Beverly Hills. He must know exactly how this, and no, the fucking fender is off the car, but the fender back on the car, okay? I think she's trying to sort of lightly shame Raquel into always telling the truth and not protect, you know, I think she's trying to teach a lesson that like, oh, is someone trying to do a U of favor

and you lied to that person, you shouldn't do that, you know? I think there was like a little bit of a standard Vanderpump. Yeah. So they're like, well, let's go see Paul anyway. And I'll tell him about your lie knows. Maybe he'll have something some way to fix a lie knows as well. We should check. Oh, it's so strange for such a liar that your nose has not poked me in the face yet.

But now, you know, you know who else had trouble getting his nose working properly. had trouble getting his nose working properly. Punoucchio! Lai lai lai lai. Lai lai, we've got to Lala now we can have a Lai lai. About that at least Punoucchio's nose went to the right direction, Rick Hell. So, um, Lisa is... So, then Rick Hell is like,

well James just said he doesn't want this to be a big deal and like, I don't want it to be a big deal at least because what do you mean it's not a big deal? Your nose is on the side of your cheek. Don't spend your life pretending to him. You know, I was literally touching your ear, a cat. It's ridiculous. Don't spend your life.

Why are they saying those are touching the side of the cheek? Because that's what her mom said when when she hurt the nose, it was like on the side of the cheek. So she's like, where are you saying it's no big deal if your was like on the side of the cheek. So she's like, where are you saying it's no big deal if your nose was on the side of your cheek? Go ahead. But also isn't protect in marriage vows? Just don't marry him, okay?

It's a point. So upcoming wacky Tom's wasted scene, Jesus Christ, that's my next note. Okay, so Baba, we go to Baba's house, and instead of their big Baba painting above the couch, now they have a Baba whiteboard where they just write Bubba a lot And it's just like Bubba pasta Bubba Bubba love you Bubba love you back Bubba

Yeah, it's like living art, you know like it can change you can move it can like you know It's a lot else. Let's it's kind of like the next evolution of Bubba art So Katie's in the kitchen and Lala comes in and she's like, oh my god, Katie, my handyman did such a good job with the door. It's like no one even tried to bust through it. So then Katie tells a story as if this is like, no, just a, no, there's just a normal thing that happened. She goes, so Schwartz was at Santa Falls, yeah, at all night.

And I was like really annoyed by it. So I jammed the door shut. And then when he came home, he just bustled down the door like, cool it, man. I'm like, all of this sounds wrong. Also, isn't there a backdoor? I mean, I don't know. Like, they always tell these like funny little stories, but like when you think about it, like that's not normal. That's not healthy. On either one of your parts. Yes. Yeah. This shows really bugging me today. Like every scene I'm like, wait, so that's abusive, right? Like a guy kicking down your door.

So we have the possible abuse storyline. And then we have you locking Tom out and then him knocking down the door. What the fuck is going on with this show? At the same time, the Brock deadbeat dad domestic violence thing is going on. Funny games, guys. Funny games. So Lala was like, what the fuck was last night, dude? Sound of all. I mean, usually I'm a tough bitch, but like, not only are you bullying me, you're also being a troll. You know what bad bitches never say? You're bullying me. I've never heard a bad bitch in my entire life say you're bullying me. Thank you, Ronnie.

Thank you. And I'm sure Tupac living inside her also probably wouldn't say that. So, um, so then Ariana joins and she's like, you should see my house. It looks like a light store. I'd rather go back to the venue shop with Charlie. So, then we see that Santa Claus like setting up a million lights in his house or at their house.

Yeah, I just wrote, uh, so then Arianna's like, um, do you have a bigger glass? So they go sit on the couch and Arianna's like, wow, look at all your candles lit. Katie's like, that was an expensive candle. God, that's fucking Katie. You know, when you go to those stores and you're like, who the fuck is spending enough money on candles that they can afford a space like in the prime real estate of West Hollywood? You know that candle store in West Hollywood. It's like who's going candle candle candle like the lyrium or something? The one on 10.

Yeah, candle lyrium. Yeah. I think that's what it's called. So yeah, it's Katie. So Katie's like, okay, so because it's quiet, they have nothing to talk about. So she's like, well, before you walked in, we were talking about last night. And LaLa's like, yeah, what, what's that? And she's like, I don't know, I just kind of checked out because everyone was yelling at each other. So I was thinking, you know what,

tomorrow you could to shoot a Benye scene. So just, just, just think of the benyaise. So Lala's like, yeah, but like Tom started the yelling and Ariana nods and she goes, yeah, that's like one thing about that I like about him. He's very, it sounds like she's gonna say, like he's very passionate about the things that he, whatever, he's going that way and Lala goes,

oh, he yells at women and Ariana goes, well, he yells at anybody. Oh, because he did it to Stasi, he does it to Katie. He used the F word with Lisa, like kind of attacking women verbally, right? I'm like, oh, Lala, I'm sorry, Lala. If this were Jack, that's one thing, but I'm sorry. I don't, I see what Lala is trying to do here,

and I'm not going to go side it. Right, especially when your little teammate is Katie, who later we see the clip of her being like, why are you saying I'm attacking you because I'm calling you a whore? It's like, give me a break with your faux feminism when it's convenient. Now that said, Tom Sattaball shouldn't be yelling at women,

but, should be yelling at Tom. What the hell? They should even show the clip of her yelling at Tom in this. So she's like, you know, I guess I'll give him the opportunity to purge maybe. And Ariana's like, yeah, he's never going to be that person who comes into a room and is like a dick. Like he's always going to be cordial and cool no matter what. And she goes, oh, so you're saying like he oils you up and then he's like, here's the sparkling

water with the flower in it. No. She said that he may not like you, but he's not gonna be addicted to you every time he sees you. Stop, she twists every fucking thing the rest of this episode, every single thing that comes out of her mouth. She always does, she always has. And in the past, I've always enjoyed that about her.

But I think that like now, she is deaf. Lala has definitely taken this like, high in mighty stance, like I'm married, I'm an is deaf. Lala has definitely taken this like high in mighty stance. Like I'm married, I'm an adult now. And then she does talk to Pete. She does talk like so rudely to people. And then when people push back, she twists it like, how am I the bad guy?

I'm the good friend here. Oh my God, you always yell at women. She always does that. And I think she actually discredits the people who really are, the like who are the victims of that and the people who do do that. Like she's kind of like I'm not down with that. And so Lala's like she goes,

I don't want you in the middle. I just want to shed light on, I just want to shed light and like you can't like fine. But I will be having a discussion with your man, Sandra, I like that. She's like, I don't want to put you in the middle but I am gonna accuse your long-term boyfriend of being a raging massageness with rage issues.

But I'm not gonna be in the middle. Right. She goes, yeah, I not going to put you in the middle. I just wanted you to shed some light and you're telling me you can't. So that's fine. I'm like, okay, I can. You're sticking your hypocritical, you know, restolent, contoured nose and where it doesn't belong, trying to ruin a relationship. And you got called on it and you look like a fucking moron in a situation that's literally the easiest to look good in by calling out a deadbeat bad And now you're crying bullying a misogyny because you fucking lost, okay? Yeah, that's that's what's happening

So that's one down in Georgia. Well, it's like shut up law. So she's like, oh, that's fine I'll be having a discussion with your man. And she's like, okay, good Yeah, so then we go to Santa Valle. Ariana just stays completely calm no matter what she's like, okay, good. Yeah. So then we go to Santa Valle. Ariana just stays completely calm no matter what. She's like, okay, can we get back to spelling this delicious $100 candle now? Thanks. Well, because Ariana knows that La La is going to be the one that looks like the bigger asshole. I mean, I know a lot of people are annoyed with Santa Valle this season because they find

that he's being very arrogant or cocky or whatever. But still, like La La is ridiculous, she's absolutely ridiculous. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crapence commercial. Now speaking of ridiculous, now the Tom's, Tom's are hanging out over at, you know, Santa Vaughan, Ariana's house, and oh Tom Schwartz brought a, he brought a vision board, all we're gonna do a deep dive. Oh yes, gonna do a deep dive. Oh, yes, could be a deep dive, a business session, mixed with a hang session. So it's fun and games with the Tom's and lights and mushrooms.

They do mushrooms. Yeah, they do mushrooms and roll around in the lights, cracking each other up. And it's annoying to watch. Okay, that's all I have to say about it. Yeah, I don't live in use, I'm just like, don't need these scenes anymore. Yeah, I refused to even cover that next. No. Um, you gotta tell me what you gotta tell me how to win how to lose. So Charlie's moving and she's joking with Corey. She's like, oh my God,

your pants are ripped. So she and I brought come over and Corey is like, you know what, you guys can help us with? Like tonight, the one thing we really need is like to watch a movie after all this is done. So could you like help us hang a TV? And then and Brock is like, well, I know a really good guy. He can do this on to save him. It's you're looking at him. All right. Uh, he's so supportive. It's like she, it's like a sing along of she knows greatest hits, you know. So he's like, yeah, I come to Holywood and I look at the stars on the ground and it's

like a hit list for me. We've got Rob, the seven minute guy. We've got, and then we see a clip of she and I'm like, um, I'm with a man and I was out of do everything. And she was like, yeah, I mean, I've been with a lot of cool people like John Mayor, Chassi Maccalf. He's like, Chassi Maccalf, we're just playing cards with that dude. I like that she noticed a control over Brock's list because she's like, um, we should start with the A-list service before we go with the Rob.

So John Mayor, Chassi Maccalf. Um, by the way, I just wanted to, I know I was surprised we didn't get to Eddie's sitriana. I was like, I think that's what we were all thinking. Um, I just want to point out know I was surprised we didn't get to Eddie's Sid Rihanna. I was like, I think that's what we were all thinking. I just want to point out that this was the first time we saw Corey, so I have to make my flash snap judgments because that's kind of my thing. So, yeah, I have to wait in, so that way I can have a,

I want to have a take that I can regret for a few years. Okay guys, so this is the moment. Okay, actually I feel pretty good about my take, which was that when I first saw him, I was like, he was way hotter than I expected. Like in the pictures, you just look like very average, but he was like, I actually was surprised that he was like much hotter, I thought,

and then I was like, oh, he's hot, which means he's gonna be terrible. And I think, I think he's terrible. I think it's working out. I think my take is working out for me right now, Ronnie, like based on the rest of the episode, I think he might be terrible. What did you think? I just assumed so. You know, yeah, but I don't have a lot of money. There's a hotline band of pump rules. He's probably going to be terrible.

He hasn't earned my attention yet. That's, that's where I stand with it. Right. I'm trying to think of him right now. And he's like a fuzz. He's just like a a fuzz over a fuzz filter on a face. So Charlie tells us this fascinating story. She's like, well, I wasn't going to move. Corey from San Diego, but then we were in San Diego and she went and rock were in San Diego. And then I saw she and then I was like, oh my god, San Diego. But then we're like here, so we're here now. Yeah, I'm like, I'm gonna need Charlie to do a little better because she had so much, she was so great last season

and she showed so much promise at the beginning of the season. But like, these sort of scenes are not doing it for me. I have to say, I agree. That story was basically like, you live next to Shina and Brock and they may have had sex during that time and your next story when that happened. I'm like okay. And I'm not sure this qualifies for like the moth but maybe a qualifiable moth. It's for something. The sloth. The sloth. The spin off of the moth with just idiots from Vanderpump rules.

I would actually go to that. So, uh, she's like, I'm gonna have culinary night and like, oh my god, like, to be honest, I would like, honestly, like everybody, like, honestly, there besides Lala. And Brock's like, yeah, cause we roll good apples, you know, there's one who's not a good apple. Alright. And she's like, ah, she's really got me I think she's one wing, but then she's really another way. She's like a Reversible vest. Now she's like ankle warmers. Are they ankle warmers or are they leggings? Who really knows? One of the great parts about being petite is that you can wear an ankle warmer. That's a halter top.

So then, then, yeah, she's basically, Charlie is like, I just want to get blacked out at this thing. Because I just want to be around support of people in blackout and then Brock is like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He thinks that's like the funniest thing he's ever heard. And then Charlie is like, I just want to like taste a bunch of food and I'm not going to be judged. Okay, I'm not going to be judged. Okay, I'm not going to be judged.

Like, okay. So now we get back to the more pressing story line of the day, which is for Kellen James at Dr. Paul Noseves, medical office, getting ready for the consultation. And James is super, super nervous because he thinks he's going to get in trouble. And he thinks that Dr. Noseve is going to be like, well, everything was perfect, but your boyfriend ruined your nose. And so he's extremely antsy. Plus Lisa is, he's afraid of what Lisa's gonna say to him.

And maybe he'll lose, see you next Tuesday for the fifth time. So she's like, yeah, she was really confused. She had already had a sit down with the doctor and explained to him that my doctor messed up my nose. He's like, well, he did call the mess up your nose, did he? I mean it wasn't a very kissable nose. Second I tried to kiss it, boom got smashed. All right, he did a bad job. So she's like, yeah, but it wasn't deviated before you bumped it. It was just crooked. And he's like, well, detonings a bit annoying, isn't it? Because, you know,

I mean, I have to see you next Tuesday and it's my first night back, sir. Like, you just get the woman's nose on her cheek, sir. Yeah. And then he tells us, I mean, I'm here for cash feelings, but you also have taken to my feelings, too. I'm like, what are your feelings on this situation? Your poor girlfriend is tormented and tortured by the situation and you're concerned about your like dead end DJ job once a week in the back garden of West Hollywood restaurant. Come on. Yeah. He's a quality day. He's trial day for me, isn't it? I mean, was it your fault or was it not your fault? James? And he rolls his eyes. And he's so Lisa gets there. And of course, he's totally fake James

Yeah, I just want to preach say I appreciate you so much Lisa. I know you had to pull strings You know this is the guy biggest guy in Beverly Hills. I mean it doesn't get much better than that. But I don't get much better than that And Lisa's like how I'm gonna ask you almost head butter when you go kiss her and and he goes I almost asked you when you go kisser and he goes, I'm a man! I'm a man! I'm a man! I'm a man, Lisa!

Don't you remember I'm a man! So she goes, Well I've been married 39 years and Kid has never had butted me on the nose. Although admittedly he has bumped into my ankles many times. Oh Ken, okay let's put you back in your dock. It'll be as bad as I thought. He has boob-butted me before, don't like me. There's this the truth after you've lied the first time. And Rikkel's like, Rikkel actually goes off

to get her pictures taken by the nurse. And so Vanderpump tells James, so James, you're going to have to learn to control that temper of yours. And he's like, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, that rolling his eyes. Yeah. So Rick Ellis taking these photos. And if there's like, I feel so bad for Rick Ellis

because she really has a complex about her nose. I mean, it really, honestly, looks perfectly normal to me. Like if it's crooked, it's so slight. And honestly, the only time you really see it is when she like holds her head back, which we perfectly normal to me. Like, if it's crooked, it's so slight. And honestly, the only time you really see it is when she holds her head back, which we see her do this. And they just zoom in on her like deviated septum. I'm like, God, this poor girl's gonna watch this episode

and be totally retriggered. I know, they sew her like close-up pictures. And she's so pretty. And so Dr. Paul Thompson and Vanderpump's like, oh, this is James and Rick, I'll go to my fiance. Okay, so I just want to cut straight to the chase now. When I met you at my house,

the story I gave you there wasn't the truth, Paul. Rick, you're on the stand. And Rick, I was like, well, a week after the cast was off, my fiance has nose bumped into my nose when they went for a kiss and he bumped my nose. And there's just silence while Paul looks at her like, why would you think I give a fuck?

I know. I'm about to take $32,000 from you for breaking your nose and reforming it. Okay. He's like, I'm sorry I wasn't paying attention because I was listening to the sound of coins falling into my bank account. There they are. Like the Venmo noise that goes off. So, um, so he goes, it takes a look and he goes, okay, Rick Hell, I know you are very, you're very concerned about your nose. So let's put it up on a big screen and here's a pointer and like, here's where it's crooked and you look really ridiculous. And now we could add some stuff from here to make it look less ridiculous

But it'll still look pretty ridiculous. How you feeling now, Rick? Hell I guess just like so much her nose on display. I felt so bad for her She says first this is the card a lot the cardless is crooked and then you've got a deviated septum That's got to be fixed. You know the more tip work you do the more the more collapses She's like, oh my god. Do you think that waiting tables have something to do with it? I do do a lot of tip work. He's like, your nose, recount. Your nose, okay.

So as this gets smaller, your nostrils have to get wider. So what I'm proposing is we just remove the nose overall and then put on one of those plastic cow masks on where are the nose used to be. And it'll look, well, won't look like a nose, but it'll certainly be funny. And he knows it's like you're funny. He's like your tip falling in, caused your nose holes to fall in.

So you need bigger holes. James is like, No, not bigger holes. I don't wanna woman with the bigger holes. Come on, mate. Vanderpump's like, Diling, that might cost extra. You don't need to breathe.

Just breathe through your mouth. You're just gonna breathe through your mouth. So like, well, where does this cartilage come from? That's supposed to go and like, you know, fortify your nose. And it's like, oh, well, you know, we go, we'll make a little incision below the breast. And we take a little bit of rib and put the rib in the nose.

She's got ribs on her nose. I don't even understand this. Okay, I don't even like ribs. Okay, spare ribs, baby back ribs. Don't want them. No, no, it's terrible. It might make me perfect. I don't know what Rick has thinking.

When she hears that, it's like, if anything, like, but if it's anything like the other two, we have a problem. No, absolutely not. Yeah, he doesn't want her to do that because then she's gonna have a small scar on her breasts and you're basically messing with his trophy, you know? And he's learning about it themselves.

He's so fucking disgusting. My god, James is really a fucking pig. So she's like, and now you know the complete story. So what are your thoughts? And James is like doing big frowny face. And Paul's like, well, number one, did the kiss cause this? I doubt it. And James is like, yes, yes, man, it's man, bitch.

Yeah, he's like smiling and clapping back there. Like, it's so ridiculous. But Paul's basically, they're like, well, can you fix it? And he's like, I can give you a very good improvement, which does not sound to me like a, oh yeah, don't worry, this will be totally fine. It's a, we're gonna try to do the best, but we'll probably make it worse. Kind of vibe.

Yeah, he's saying, well, I'm not gonna promise perfection now. And if you get a discount, you're gonna have to have a tiny botched tattoo, which might look like a very long mole. Some people, you know, works on some people, some people it doesn't. And James just tells us, you this means I'm not responsible for paying for the next news, drawback. Because it's helped a lot.

I know I feel better. I'm like, oh, I'm glad you feel better, James, with your not-nose issues. Disgusting. So, slam, we bring the fire. with your not-nose issues. Disgusting. So, slam. We bring the fire. Slam.

We bring the fire. Sir, James is there. All the gang is at Sir for CU next Tuesday. And Vanderpump has given him a new place for his DJ stand. And so he's all excited about that. And James is like, Welcome back, it's full fledged by me So everybody like dances to his terrible music yeah, and then Vanderpump goes to sit down with Katie area on and Tom

And Tom's like you should have tried the mushrooms the other night Lisa And taking mushrooms and rolling around on the floor or something. I don't need darling I've got over. There's already one spouse rolling around the the floor or something I don't need darling I've got over there's already one spouse rolling around the floor all day long and Pagno said a feeling back to home came back to home so she does like it's in this home doc so she does like it's so weird being here and not working and like this is like where I dance on the bar I like many of Tuesday and like I'm getting a little sad right now when I pick about it

So of course we then get the footage of her singing good as gold on the bar and just terribly I mean my god she in the singing live is just like singing live is just like, yeah, we're out. So Vanderbump goes to Lala and Rams table. And she said, can you believe a baby came out of that body darling? Yeah, and Randall's like, he's like, yeah, I know, right? It's like me trying to figure out, can you believe, to fry chicken sandwiches went into this body, am I right? Ha, ha, hey, by the way, sorry I missed your thing the other night, I apologize, I was wanking, I'm being working, I was working, huh? What a shame, I would like to invite everyone over again for an action replay, or you can

just come over to have drinks and appetizers at Marklays tomorrow. So Ken's just sitting there going, mm-hmm, drinks and appetizers at my place tomorrow. So Ken's just sitting there going, mm-hmm, drinks and appetizers and a little of them, just sliding all over the back. Ken, get back to home. So the LVP, she's... Nala! How are you tonight? How are things with you and you know who? And she's like, well, I haven't made eye contact with Santa Claus all my, and she goes, well, it's up to you if you want to talk to him or not.

But if you do talk to him and he hurts your feelings, please come back to Mama so I can absorb all that energy. Please. And Lala's like, well, I would rather talk to him tonight before he builds more rage. You know, and we have to do it without an audience because with an audience, he always wants to measure Dix and mine is always going to be bigger. You left crying and calling him a bully, so you might want to re-measure.

Yeah. So then Charlie's serving some shots over at the Tom's table. And she's like, this is my piece offering for letting me, you know, have my, my shared topus experience at your place. It's potluck, Charlie. It's a potluck. So she's telling Katie, oh, she actually says it right here. She's, I'm having a little culinary party where we're all going to bring our own food and try each other's plates and take to killer shots. It's a brand new concept I'm coming up with called Share Top Us. It's like, Bobbock, it's a Bobbock. And then we see a clip of her shopping with Ariana and she's like,

you know, it's going to be really hard to have my party where everybody brings something and we all share some top ads. But we're just moving and so I really don't have room to do it. And Ariana's just staring at her. Like, it's just like a long pause and she goes, so do you want to do it at my house? Oh my God, that would be great. Thank you so much.

What a great idea. I was thinking of being sort of this thing. Like, we could all like pitch in, like put all our money into a pot and then whatever we eat, it's just like the luck of the draw. I don't really know what to call this kind of event. But look, I like that Tom and Arianna's house is becoming like the villa blanca for the sea level cast, you know, it's like the bees get to go to actual villa blanca and then

that's the house that they're going to use for all the other parties. So then Lala comes over and puts her hands on the back of you know, front of the back on Tom's face. She's like, can I talk to you for a second? And he's like, yeah, of course. So they go talk and she's like, listen, I don't like the way things worked out. And like, I don't want to start out saying you owe me an apology. But like, what have I done that I have not acknowledged and apologized for

that you're still holding on to? Well, Lala, you've established your boundaries about what we can and cannot bring up. And what we, and when it comes to your personal life, and I respect that, I always have. But when you brought up this stuff about Brock and Sheena, it felt like a little double standardish. And I felt like your boundaries were respected, but there's weren't. And nobody ever brought anything up to you ever, not with Randall. And then she's like, I have been labeled a home-recking whore

with Tupac on the inside. Okay, so please. And then we see clips. Lala's trying to talk to Katie and saying, like, you've been throwing rocks at me and Katie going, what? Because I called you like a whore, Katie, the ultimate feminist that we're all seeing here today, everybody. And then Jack saying, go suck some more dick for Range Rovers.

And Lala saying, James sent me a text message and I'm a horn. I only like ugly dudes. Yeah. I mean, Lala's not wrong. She has been labeled that. Right. But not by them. And Tom makes a good point. He stood up for her in the beginning. He said he didn't like it. They were your friend when nobody else would be your friend, Lala.

And all that all that happened, it wasn't Tom, it wasn't Sheena, it was Jack Skating and James who were now nice to you because you have access to a PJ, okay? So keep on fucking over the only people who've ever really been nice to you on this show, stupid. That's true. And so Lala's like, I'm just a hell held to a different standard than the rest of the group. And I don't belong.

And I feel like everyone's isolating me. It's like, so this chick worked in the beginning because everyone did isolate her. And it was true. So mean. And we, oh, that's why we were rooting for her. Like, I love Lala because they were so obnoxious. And she would just go and curse them all out.

But now she's actually being obnoxious at all times. She's turned into them. Yeah, people are like, we don't want to really hang out with her. She went on, let's not forget. It's her been lost. She went on to that podcast and just totally like winning on Arianna for no reason. And then Arianna's like, fuck her. Like she creates these issues and then she's surprised that people have negative

reactions towards them towards them. And she's also changing it. She's also changing it because that's not what the fight is about. No one's isolating you. The fight is about you calling out Brock every scene for being a deadbeat dad and getting called out for it. That's it. It's not about you being isolated.

She's trying to make it this whole other discussion where she can be a victim and not have to address the initial thing, right? So she's, you know, staying very calm calm and he says you did that to yourself. Just no, I do not. You do though a lot, a lot. She goes, well, I deserve as much forgiveness as anybody else, but you haven't apologized for anything. What did you apologize for? And he just says, okay, I understand because you know the area on it was like, hey, heads up. This girl is calling you an abusive misogynist. So she's going to calm down. Yeah. So they agreed that they're going to do better, which is basically a way to say we don't

want to talk anymore. So so now we go over to Tom and Ariana's house at because they're going to get preparing for the big shared topus evening. And Ariana's like Tom, can you just take take down the lights? She's like, I think it would be cool if at some point in our lives, we had people over and you didn't put lights out. But I go, I go home! So, Cori and Charlie show up and Charlie is really excited, but she's also starting to freak out. And then, and then Brock and Shina arrive.

And Shina, so there's a whole bit that comes up in a few seconds about Shina's enchiladas, but what I feel like was never even highlighted in this bit was that she comes in with a baking dish full of her enchiladas. And the baking dish says, Shina's fab enchiladas. She has a personalized baking dish for her enchiladas. Which I can go up at that. So Charlie is like, oh my God, did you bring a whole ass lobster?

You guys, because everyone comes with food, but Charlie didn't, right? Charlie didn't actually bring food, which is weird. Like you're hosting, you're getting this hosted at somebody else's house and everybody else is bringing food. What are you doing, Charlie? What exactly are you doing? So she thanks everyone for coming and everyone announces what they brought. Katie brought carnitas, tacos, and James brought some

Movesas. I'm not Fabian Saladas. And Fabian Saladas, I've got real. I'm Robert. And then the dude, Charlie is like, yeah, I think we've all heard about Sheena's famous enchiladas. And then we see like an enchiladas remix of Sheena being like, I know enchiladas, can't wait's famous enchiladas. And then we see like an enchiladas remix of China being like, I don't know how to do enchiladas.

Can't wait for the enchiladas enchiladas enchiladas enchiladas enchiladas enchiladas. And so they do some shots and Charlie's like, oh my God, I just had something new. Wow. So then we go to Villa Rosa with Randall and La La and Mama's like, you know, like I feel like I'm like vibing the scene of the crime. Oh, I feel like I'm returning to the scene of the crime. So oh my God, the dogs are barking. What do you think they're saying when they bark like that?

I'm sure they're asking each other the same question about you. So she comes in and Vanderpom's like, when are you getting married? I'm the maid of honor. Don't forget, darling. Yeah. And she's like, and so Randall says, well, when the fall comes, we're going to plan for next year. She's next year. And he's like, apparently Randall really wants a big production, which I totally believe. I think he totally wants to join Travolta to be there. He wants 50 cent. He wants Robert Nero and Bruce

Wells. He wants to do a whole thing, right? And Lala's like, yeah, I just want the backyard. That's all, I'm just such a, I am so humble. I'm just Lala Kent, the humble, humble Lala Kent. And I said, we don't even have to get married. Let's just like stay together because we're happy. And if things go south, you could just dip out on me. You don't have to worry about anything legally. I'm like, sure, Lala.

Yeah, except that you know the common law marriage is and you just had his baby. So, right. Like she hasn't done all that math in her head. Like just me humble, Lala. She's carrying a platter that says Lala's humble and to Ladas. She's just trailing Lala. Humble Ladas.

She's just, you know what, she's in this mode. She's in adult mode now, because she's on a double date with Ken and Lisa. Now she's gonna be like, I'm mature about everything. I'm fine. I'm not immature. So I think that's, she's just sort of trying to play that card at the moment.

Right. So Lala's like, well, Katie came up to me at Sir, and she's like, so are you going to that thing at Tom and Arianna's house tomorrow night? And I'm like, come again. And Rand is like, so are you going to that thing at Tom and Arianna's house tomorrow night? And I'm like, come again. And Rand is like, I hate when you say that. It's not as easy as you think, all right?

Shut up, Rand, for not talking about you. And so Lisa, she gets excited. She gets a little bit of the, like, oh, face. Because she goes, oh, they invited everybody, but to the house. But you, would you say that has broken you slightly ever so slightly? Let me waft it in. Let me waft it in. Oh.

She's like, this is more my speed. While they're in Valley Village, I'm in Beverly Hills. So she's like, yeah, she's like, it's nice to be low key and I'll be honest. It's nice to be around people that have just one glass of wine. So then we cut to the other party where Rickles just like doing shots and shots. The fun times. Yeah, Rickles getting drunk and James doing water shots. And so they're splitting into two tables and she was like, well, I just like really

want to see Charlie and space when she tries my fat Angelana. And so now they time for Charlie to start the process. So she's gonna start with the tough one, the hardest one first, she's going for a muscle. So she is like, they're showing her how to pick it out. She like, skips it out with a fork, it's your puts in her mouth. And the music's like, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.

It's like, I'm like, scared for her, cut the music's like, bum bum bum bum bum bum bum. It's like, I'm like scared for her, cut the music. I'm very reactive to music. And then she like does a face like she's gonna puke. She then she goes, actually, that's not bad. That's actually really good. That's really good.

So nervous. She's like, I never thought in my life I would ever be trying muscles or sashimi of fish. So next time I go to Mastro's I'm getting a glass of wine and I'm gonna be a fancy bitch. And so the music stops and she's like, oh my god gross, don't tell Sheenat, don't really love the enchiladas. The texture's weird. And she just got to Sheenat going, I'm just a shini-gore. Mmm, I'm talking to Lana. I'm talking to Lana. I'm talking to Lana. Uh.

So, Raquel asks, like, making small talk how the bar is going and they say that Friday they have their meeting with the mission statement and Katie's like, oh, so what are you gonna see at next? Because I think I should come. And Shorja's like, oh, well, I might be distracted there, but I mean, okay, I guess you can come. She's like Tom. I'm coming. He's like, okay, blah blah, okay.

Yeah, and then she's like, so SantaVall, like Lala was there. Did you guys talk or did you guys avoid each other? I'm just asking Sheena. And she's like, wow, I feel like I didn't have anything to say. I mean, did she say anything to you about me? And Katie just goes, um, and then we see a clip of Lala going, she is a dangerous person. She is a dangerous person. And Katie's like, um,

just like she's sort of in a similar impasse of things and Brock Chimes in. He's like, have Lala coming at me for confiding in Lisa and saying that she's because I'm a crore, I'm a liar. It's like, well Lala coming at me for confirming Lisa and saying that she's because I cried I'm liar. It's like well, when Lala feels dog pile, she's gonna be like, it's gonna come from an ugly place. They come from an ugly place. Yeah, she knows like that dangerous. I'm not

dangerous. Not dangerous. And Brock says, she's the one that says, I'll treat you go to this respectfully, but cause that's me and accept it, you know, just yeah, she does it to herself. So then back to Lala, she's like, so I realized when I was talking to Tom that no one in this group actually knows me. She's like, but darling, you have to realize you've changed Lala, you've moated.

And Ken's like, you're not the same person you used to be at all,cio not okay this is this is Lala from the restaurant No idea no idea Because well I feel like I'm a better person and that makes me sad which is a phrase that you would only be heard on Band-Up from rules so then she starts choking up and she goes, I'm like, I'm a different person, but like in a very short span of time, like I lost my dad, I got sober, I became a stepmother,

I had a funeral, I'm not married, and I had a baby and like, it does not feel good when you feel like everyone else has earned their place, but la la, still has to prove herself. Like the issue is still there. And now Lisa's like, oh yes. Oh, this is the broken bird I wanted. Yes, just not that.

No one's asking. No one's asking you to prove yourself. You're being an asshole and they're calling you out on it. You're still trying to make other people look bad for camera time. So in the end, all that change means nothing because you're still at heart a complete dick hole. OK. She's also leading with all those things

as if that to justify all like asshole behavior. She's like, well, my dad died, which is terrible. But she's sort of like, she leaned into like her dad died and getting sober, all these things. Oh, she's doing all the greatest hits today. It's like, the dad is all the victim things she can roll up into one story, the bullying. You're on being bullied, I'm being ostracized, I'm this

and that she's taking like real life victim storylines and applying them to her being an asshole and being called out on it. Yeah. So over at the potluck, it's their, they're toasting to trying new things. And then she knows like, all right guys, we've got to get home to our baby, which we have at home. It's a baby. And we're going to have a baby to go home to right now. So game time. So everybody runs over to the living room to play a game and Charlie and Rikela are all drunk. They're dancing around and Rikela's like, we're Charlie and Rachel, we're here to serve your tables. Woo. Of course, like, I've never seen R Raquel buzz and she has fun as shit. Yeah.

So now they're going to play a game and sort of some sort of game that they have and they have to do like a lightning round first. So it's like, okay, first ladies. So Ariana star. She's Michelle Obama. And then Kitty goes Hillary Clinton and Charlie goes, Jackie O, but then gets a Raquel and Raquel, you know, she doesn't do well with like public speaking. So she sort of freezes, so Charlie whispers in her ear to try to help her.

It's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, she doesn't do well with public speaking. She was just yelling, hey, I'm Raquel, what are your servers? She doesn't know. She does not know, that's why. So, yes, but she doesn't like being put on the spot about things she doesn't know. Makes her not knowing this even stronger. It intensifies the not knowingness of her gal.

So then they play Truther Dare and there's a 30 second hand job to the most phallic thing in the room and she says, oh my God, what does phallic mean? Oh my God, I love this night show. That's phallim. So Ariana's, so then there's like, I love blossom. That's my ambiolic. Doesn't even sound like phallic.

I love family ties. That's Alex Keaton. Oh my god. All right, we're never playing another game again. So then, now they're doing never have I ever, and there's a question about plastic surgery. Like, never have I ever had plastic surgery. So, Michael goes, well, I just had a consultation about revising my nose surgery, and everyone's like, you had no surgery? We didn't even know about that. She's like, no, you can, I just feel like, like, of course, my nose is crazy.

Of course, you had to have known, like, I feel like it's fake when you say you didn't know because she thinks her nose is like this blimp, right? So she thinks there when she thinks they're being totally insincere when they said they didn't even realize, but they didn't realize and so she starts to cry and she's like, I look in the mirror and I think Can I get away with it or not? And she's just like crying. I then it cuts the quarry and he makes crazy eyes, like this crazy bitch. I thought she was phone when she was drunk, but I take that back. I was like, yes, I knew he was terrible.

He's terrible. Well, there are all the guys who are just like, what is going on in here? So then she's like, it's embarrassing because I thought I would go pay $16,000. And now it's gonna cost me $16,000 and now it's going to cost me $30,000 to fix it. And I'm like, no, we can't.

No. And she's like, they show her with her phone calculator. And she's like, so $30,000 divided by $200 to shift is 150 shifts. I would have to work at serve for my new nose. Well, well, I guess that's six months of work or so or I don't know. So then, uh, well, either way, by the way, getting that ice from social. So James is like, And do you know how stressful this is for me, dude? For me? And Ariana's like, uh, for you. for me, dude, for me. And Ariana's like, for you. And James is like, I mean, who's staring?

I had nose every single night. Me, a crooked, crooked nose. All I'm there want. And Ariana's like, no, she is. She's the one looking at the mirror every day. And it's like, it's my fucking face. And I have to look at every day in the mirror. And he's like, well, I was the one who warned you.

This was never going to happen. Pre. And Ariana's like, OK, but that's not going to help. That's going to just make her feel worse. Okay. And she tells us stressful because he has to look at it. James should probably never say that again. Yeah. So they go back to the game of the category as boy band and try and say, oh my god, this is easy. So James is, okay, well then, Tornado Recail, the answer this time, called. So, okay, so they start with the lighting round of boy bands, Ariana's like, factory boys, Katie goes in sync and Charlie goes, one direction, but then again,

her call's like, so then Charlie Whisper something in her ear, she's, James gets so mad. It's pretty fucking annoying, playing a drinking game with everyone's sober. And you're like, your sobering everyone's getting shit faced on absent. And he's like, Tom, are you even listening? Well, rappers now. Rap is all right. Listen, I'm yelling because everyone else doesn't shut the fuck up. All right. So if you can't think of it, please refrain from yelling because it destroys

the whole point, Charlie. And she's like sorry, geez. As someone who loves his games, I think that what's destroying the vibe is you yelling at everyone when there's not even jeans. There's all, I think it's boys versus girls, but it's always, there's always that guy in the game, right? Yeah, like that.

It's always this fucking guy in the game. Way too competitive over a game that no one's dating seriously. Right. So, uh, Tari's like, sorry, Jesus. He's like, do you not know how to play the guy Charlie? She's like, God, I'm sorry. Oh, games like Enceladus. You've never had them before.

She's like, okay, I got it. I got it. So they start answering Arianna's like, Kanye West and Charlie says, Biggie Smarze and Michele's like, the stuff with Christmas trees, Christmas trees on it's like, not rap-o-z, not rap-o-z, not rap-o-z,

she's rapping, not rap-o-z, we're going. So then Tom Schwartz is like, oh, James Kennedy, I can't believe you didn't see that because I literally had a top hundred Billboard chart in Dubai and you still don't even know my name. How do you think I feel? I'm Lichtenstein's number 45 most popular rapper and you still can't even think of my name. How do you think I feel about that? Okay, he goes, how do you not even think of my name. How do you think all I feel about that, okay? He goes, how do you not even think? And I think that the guy is really just such a piece of shit. I just can't stress that enough. Like, it's not even fun at this point.

And then we get a clip of him rapping, his terrible fucking music, back in the days, 14 years, London town something, something, went on vacay, guess it was a teaser, later found out she was going to a beta. P, and then James believed you're not top of mind. I know. And so James did an interview, it says, I mean, this is just a no-wing at this point. I mean, Rick had, because you can't even answer one question right. I mean, it's winding me up. I'm like a monkey with a little tambourine in my hands. If you wind me up too much, I'm going to

stop going like fucking, huh, ha, ha, ha, ha. Like, no, don't blame her because you can't control your emotions in a very stupid situation. You can't have a scene a few weeks ago where your fiance talked about how much anxiety she has when being put on the spot to talk and say you're gonna support her,

but now say that she's being annoying that she can't get one answer correct in a low-stick situation, then that's wanting you up. And you tell her, but now say that she's being annoying that she can't get one answer correct in a low-stick situation, then that's winding you up, and you tell her, how can you not think, no sir, you do not deserve Raquel. Also, you call yourself a musician, and you don't know what a tampering is, okay, noted. So Raquel is out of that round,

so we're just gonna continue, Cypress Hill, go. Sorry you guys are so dumb. You can't figure it out. And Charlie's like, God, we're not dumb because Cypress Hill go. So are you guys are so dumb you can't figure it out and Charlie's like God we're not dumb because they were kind of making faces after he yelled at them So he snapped at them Yeah, because he was trying to be like cool by saying Cypress Hill like sort of like a deeper cut and they're like ooh They're pros hill so then he gets all mad like so he got to damn So they're like okay, they're like fine. Fuck this or just like walks away. Like, I'm not gonna play this game anymore.

And don't call me dumb. Good for you Raquel. Well, kind of, I mean, not really. This is how she did it. Sorry, babe. And then she got up and walked away. So they don't need this, that's fine. So she walked away and Charlie's like,

you can't call us dumb. He's like, well, you made fun of the fact that, okay, we're done with the guy. And Tom's like, chill, dude. And then, by the way, boyfriend of the fact that I'm okay with the guy and Tom's like chill, dude And then by the way boyfriend of the year Corey who just heard someone call his girlfriend dumb and just sits there and does says nothing By the way, yeah fun show fun episode guys and then James like what's that a bit much? It's like oh god James You know, I'll have an episode where you're like good for James and, and then you'll be like, oh, he's still awful. I always forget how awful he is.

He sucks. This guy sucks. I mean, he gets worse every fucking year, and it's worse now because he's sober. It's like, at least before you had, well, he's saying he's sober. I don't know that he's really sober because he's really freaking out at a party with alcohol stills. But anyway, whether he's sober or not, at least that was his excuse for a long time. And he sucks.

Like you, you're worth now, you're worth. Fucking terrible. I hope she gets rid of him. I hope so too, because she's the saint. So thank you all for being here, for listening, and for those who watched, for watching. Don't forget to buy your tickets to our shows. That's at watchocrapants.com. And if you want to watch this,. Don't forget to buy your tickets to our shows. That's at WatchUpCrapins.com.

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