Watch What Crappens - RHOA: Tokyo Draggin'

Episode Date: January 22, 2019

The Real Housewives of Atlanta take Tokyo. Can they keep the dragon inside NeNe from scorching the earth? We're doing a couple of shows a week on video which you can find on Patreon along with our bonus eps. This week's is a breakdown of the Temptation Island premier and Tidying Up. Find it at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. **Crappens Live has added a second show to Dallas on Feb 8 and a second show in Cincinnati, plus announced shows in Vancouver,Phoenix, Portland Irvine, and Boston! Find ticket links at http://www.watchwhatcrappens.com **New "Ben in the Streets, Ronnie in the Sheets" Limited Edition tees avail at www.CrappensMerch.com until Feb! Free shipping on orders of over $45 til Jan 22. You can also find store links and ticket links at http://www.watchwhatcrappens.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts.

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Shannon, out of a cannon Anthony. The incredible, edible Matthew sisters. And Lizzie Drucker, a fine mother f- We love you guys. Hello and welcome to Watch With Carapans. The podcast about all that crap we just love to talk about on Yeo Broms. I'm Ronny Karam. I'm also on the Roseprix Bachelor Rost podcast, which is in full effect at the moment. So good check it out. And here I am with my little Bestie and the creator of Real Housewares of Kitchen Island. Mr. Ben Madelker, Hello, Ben. Hey, what's going on? Not much, baby. Hey, Dylan.

You know, I'm great. I'm great. I feel great. I feel great. I feel energized. I am ready to dive into this crazy week of watercraft ends. Yes, it's going to be so fun. We're doing our taro stitches this week.

So our schedule is going to be changed up just a little bit. So don't freak out, everybody. You're still going to get all your damn recaps, okay? They're coming. They're coming. The only one we're taking a break from this week is Top Chef because we have an extra episode that's going to be a live show in Charleston. So, sorry. But everything else will be here. Yeah, we're going to be for those wondering. Yeah, schedule is going to be messed up. We're doing this week's below deck episode. We are recording Thursday evening in Charleston and then on Friday night, which is also coincides

with our seven year anniversary. So it's our seven year anniversary show in Charleston. We're gonna do a classic Southern Charm episode. We still actually have not chosen it yet. I guess we should probably choose that later today. We will. Don't worry. Stay tuned. Just follow us on social media.

It's really important that you follow us on social media, which is at what crap is on Twitter, and at what crap is on Instagram, because that's where we oftentimes announce our most important and salient announcements. And there's one coming tomorrow morning at 10 a.m. central. So stay tuned for that. It's gonna be really exciting for some of you people for all of us. Listen, we're one big happy family.

We go, one person's excited. We're all excited. We're so excited. I was taking a pause. I'm like, I'm just listening to Ben. Ryan is like, when you're excited, I'm the muse. You know, I'm excited. I'm nervous. I'm having like nervous dreams. I know you are too. I had a crazy nervous dream about you the other night. I texted you about you know just meaning well whenever we talk to people that we've become friends with from these shows I'm like what was I saying about Southern charm the season went a lot of means shit so I've got to kind of stand by that you know I'm scared I'm scared to get into the face. I'm finding this to be so interesting

because I feel like you're so generally fearless when it comes to this stuff. And like, I think it's behind so much back of quality. Well, when it's behind so much back, of course I am. But then I, you know how I get, I feel like a need to be completely honest, even when I don't need to be. And be like, well, I called you a stupid whore for five years.

And I meant it. Okay. Next, you know, and so it's just like an awkward, it's not that I'm not going to do that. It's just it's just so awkward. But anyway, so that's coming up. So let's see how we fare there. And we've got a bunch of new shows. Cincinnati, we sold out.

So we're adding an earlier show that day. So make a day of it, people. I'm calling it the happy hour show. I think that's a fun way to brand it. Come to our happy hour showing Cincinnati. Happy hour Cincinnati. Matt Tenei. And then we're going to do a show that night. It's going to be a super fun day. We're going to be in Portland. We're going to be in the Vancouver. Just for last comedy festival. Yay. We added a second show Dallas on Friday night, where we will be not sure what we're recapping because we were gonna do BulloDec,

but that show's gonna be over. So we're gonna have to come up with something new. Yeah, just, this is the crap in style. Yes. We never said we're organized people. You should all be so happy that we even have a website up, okay? We're a disaster. So we'll re-announce what that's gonna be soon. organized people, you should all be so happy that we even have a website up, okay? We're just asked there. So we'll re-announce what that's going to be soon. And then

we're all spent Irvine and Phoenix everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere.

We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're all spent everywhere. We're for a bin of the streets running the sheets. And last but not least, tomorrow, we will be streaming live on TV party our pump rules recap. And that's gonna be at about 12ish Pacific time. So come over there and watch that talk to us

while we do it, okay? It's gonna be so fun. Get your TV party up on iPhone or Android or whatever you all use. Yeah, so my anxiety dream about you, I feel like sharing it with the world, which is that I had a dream. Their Ronnie was just like sitting there on Skype waiting for me to come on. So we could record our episode and I looked at the clock and it was like,

like, I was 26 minutes late and I hadn't texted him and I was like, oh, shit, shit. And then it was like suddenly it's segue to like it was a live show. And I was like refusing to go on stage with Ronnie. But instead I was like, no shit, shit. And then it was like suddenly it's segue to like, it was a live show and I was like refusing to go on stage with Ronnie, but instead I was like, no Ronnie, you just go, let's do a panel instead. And I sat in the audience while Ronnie sat up there with a panel and the panel of people included my friend from college, Maribel Flores.

I don't know why she got into my dream. And then I felt bad. So then I like rounded up. I was like to make it up for Ronnie, I'm gonna get a whole bunch of celebrities to come on to watch our crap ends. And I rustled up Kate Chestain and Bill Paxton, Reston Peace.

And I was like, Ronnie, I got Kate and Bill Paxton to come onto the show and you were like, great, and then we started recording it from like a nail salon and the ladies who worked there were like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. And I was like, no, I've got Bill Paxton here and then I woke up. Wow. Yeah, it was really, it was intense. I, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Oh my gosh, this was giving me so much anxiety.

The poor lady in Tokyo is like, please don't be like, it's so disrespectful in our culture when you're late. I will take it as a personal affront. Yeah, as poor Aya, she actually thought that these women would care if she took it as a personal affront. Oh, she tried so hard. Yeah, welcome. Welcome to the show, babe. Yeah, welcome. So this was the episode where they went to Japan. So it opens up with like, the women doing various things all around Atlanta. And we see Candy and Todd doing a sexy photo shoot

for her upcoming Dunge. Welcome to the dungeon cabaret thing, you know, and so she's just like up on a pole. I thought it was gonna be like a whole big to-do because this was like in the trail-earned stuff, but it was just part of like this opening montage. Yeah, I'm kind of getting sick of watching Candy make money in 9 million different ways. Like I'm not jealous or I'm not mad that she's making the money. I'm just like a dungeon party. Please spare me. Okay. Does nobody need their vagina titan today? Like where are we stuck with this? So Eva arrives and she comes in one of her big hippie dresses and yeah to to celebrate the arrival of Eva, the music department's like, what the hell isuh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, bruh, So Don Juan is you know a little messy here whatever

I'm trying to get some gossip as she comes in and Candies like well, this is why I'm doing this party. I like to turn the negative Into something that I profit off Someone said that I tried to that I was gonna try to rape them with a date rape drug So I'm making date rape drugs called Candy Coded Date Raped Drugs. Welcome. Yeah.

What's she's? Candy Coded Rufies. She's like, say now, say la, I mean, don't join into say la, where there's not gonna be any drama, just, roomless. So that's actually the lead song in her perlask show. Yeah. is not gonna be any drama just for less. So that's actually the lead song in her for less show. Yeah.

So yeah. So she's like patting herself on the back for deciding to like, be like own the idea that she has a dungeon, which I never thought was that crazy in the first place. Like I don't know why she, the day-wrapped thing that was, I can see getting mad at that,

but the dungeon thing, I don't know why she's the day-rape thing that was the, I can see you getting mad at that. But the dungeon thing, I don't know why she would ever be upset about it. So I feel like I'm more thrown off by the Habati room. Yeah, Habati room, I think, is more of a defensive in-signuation. And like, she's got a Habati room in her basement. Like, what? She is crazy.

She is a crazy person. I would never trust her. Yeah, so basically this is just an excuse, of course, to talk about who everybody's mad at. It's currently. And Ava's mad because Porsche said in front of everybody that Ava's messy and talk shit about Cynthia and Candy's like, whoa, what did you expect? Hi. Yeah.

Welcome. Welcome to the show. Have you ever watched it? I felt like Ava was basically trying to broker a deal with candy. I've like I'm gonna join your side If you join if you like join me right now in bashing Porsche because she's basically like I thought Porsche was my friend Who that sort of friend would do that? But then she calls me on says that I was like being shady isn't basically she's saying isn't Porsche the worst And I'm going to ally with you on hating Porsche.

But Candie's kind of like, say no. Viva. And she basically says that, you know, like you speak about women one way when they're not there and when they're there, you act really, really nice. So yeah, you're shady, you're shady.

Yeah, so just own the shade. Yeah. And she's like, you know, if you say something and you're just joking, they're always going to twist it and bring it bring it back. And even it's like, what kind of friends do that? I'm like, the kind of friends who know that watching wedding storylines are boring as fuck. Okay. That's what kind of friends. Okay, they're trying to help you. Yeah, exactly. So then Neenie goes over to Portia's house and Portia has like already bought herself a little baby bed she's just like like she's barely out of this trimester and she has like built a nursery put in a bed like gotten like 10 different

mobiles mobiles mobiles. I don't know how to say it. I'm sorry and Like she is plunging into baby Mami-Dum. In a turban. Which is like the way to do it, you know. Which I respect. Yeah, get that turban going. Yeah.

Oh, and she's like, Get them knuckles up, my door, Mimi. Because Mimi knocks. And Mimi's like, why do you already have a baby bed, stupid? Why? Why is it smaller than your dormat? And that's like, why do you already have a baby bed, stupid? Why? Why is it smaller than your dormat? And that's pretty small.

Finally, I got a baby. I got a baby bed that says welcome. I hope nobody makes fun of it. It's like, technically it's a hot dog bun, but OK, we'll call it a baby bed. So she's decided, Portia's decided that she's passed a dangerous zone. So she's ready to Portia's decided that she's passed a dangerous on. So she's ready to tell everybody about her pregnancy.

And they made this seem way shadier online, which is why you cannot trust online gossip. What the seasons are shooting. Because everyone's like, Portia is such an asshole announcing her baby during Eva's bachelor ret. Who does that? Like, oh, come on. Yeah, it's Eva's bachelor party. Yeah, like, they needed to do something

to make it exciting, okay? Yeah, like, again, she's helping you. And Eva basically said does anyone have anything that they want to say? Yeah, see how's that door? Yeah, exactly. So they're talking about like, oh my God, how is Porsche gonna get along with Candy

and Porsche is like, listen, I think that's gonna be like, we can laugh and have fun. I won't fuck with you, you don't fuck with me, and then everything's gonna be fine. It's like, okay, cool. Yeah, pretty much. Yeah. Yeah.

And then there's like a fun thing where like Neenie and Porsche act out, like Neenie pretends to be Porsche and Porsche pretends to be candy and it's sort of like act out what would happen, you know. It's funny. So airport arrivals. Yeah. This is like the battle of the stupid hats, okay?

Everybody is wearing a big stupid hat. Not sure, but felt hats are really winning this year on Bravo. Yeah, I love Tanya arriving and like she like gets out of her Uber and is like, thank you! Thank you for driving me. Oh my god, my own driver. I haven't had Bouchy Grille in the backseat. I'm so excited! We are gonna go on an airplane! Choo choo! Choo choo!

Grille's I'm very excited because we're not only going on an airplane, but we're also gonna have shrimp tossed into our mouths. All right, who's gonna take my luggage and who's gonna get some eggs thrown in their face? Who wants rice? Yves shows up, she's wearing, she has these huge braids. She's like channeling Linda Perry meets Jane Childs. It's like this very like 90s earth mother hippie, hipster thing going on.

There was like so much happening. I didn't even know how to process it. And Nini shows up with 19 suitcases, 19 Louise. And Greg is, you know, taking care of all of her luggage and I just laugh because only Neenie would be like oh you have you have really bad cancer great take 19 of my bags to the curb please yeah exactly so they all get on the plane and I love that Tanya spilled all over her first class siege like oh I got so excited I thought I was having this terrible dream Where I thought I was on the Himachic one I woke up and I was like girls and I was like oh, thank god

I'm in first class. Oh, you're excited girls. Good news. I taste delicious with fried rice Oh, I'm god that dream is so maybe so I'm sweating everywhere. Oh, no, I just spilled my complimentary water Hashtag complimentary water Am I right guys? So then Candy's like I guess we're gonna be fake now. It's called having manners like Yeah, I hate this idea that like you know like this idea like you know like oh Like I don't like you you don't like me. So we had like, you know, like this idea, like, you know, like, oh, like, I don't like you, you don't like me. So we have to be like outwardly cold and rude to each other because we don't like each

other or you just be polite because that's what people do in civil society. You just be like, I don't like that person, but I can be nice and I can be polite and like, like smooth this over. Yeah, that's how the world works, you guys. Also, how big your mom is. Yeah, it's how the world works you guys. Also, the big drama. Yeah, also how what works? Karma. Oh, girl.

Poor Marlowe. Marlowe, be nice to be nice to the service people, okay? And I know she's not, because she has service people karma, where everything goes wrong. Like my mom is sometimes read to waiters and her food always comes last and incorrect. And I'm like, you know, you got to fix that.

I don't believe in karma. That's a sin. I'm like, well, you better get on it. Okay. Yeah. Well, you don't have to believe in karma, but you can believe in, uh, you get what you give. Yeah. Which is karma.

I mean, I can't. I can't. Okay. I see what you're saying. I guarantee that some PA took Marlowe's bags and shipped them off to Omaha. Like they are somewhere singing in an Nebraska airport. The PA is like, I don't care if I get fired. I don't care if I go to jail,

because I violated some FA regulation. It was worth it. Yeah, they're like, yeah, Marlowe needs to pay. And she's not giving enough to season, so just get rid of her bags. Yeah, did they have a connection, mate? I wonder if they had a connection, because I feel like normally you only lose your bags when you have a connection

But I mean you could loot I mean you can lose your bags easily enough It just takes one one Ashley at Delta to throw your bag on the wrong plane or being extremely late Did we see Marlo show up when everybody else was showing up at the board? Yeah, she did yeah, yeah, oh darn I can't blame tardiness today everybody I've won was on for the court. Yeah, she did. Yeah. Oh, darn, I can't blame Tardiness today, everybody. Everyone was on to the party. Yeah. So yeah, Marlos Vax didn't make it and everybody's cracking up. And she's like, I'm taking candy, scredit card and going to the mall. The minute we get there. Yeah. I, what I liked was that like in an effort to feel like she fit in, you know, they all had like mounds of bags they had those little like baggage carts and and so they all like time I can't see over my bag and this is amazing. It's like a giant onion ring tower. Am I a bunch of grill?

And And Mike Marlow just like puts like her back. She has like a full luggage Thing and she's like puts like her two bags on it just to like be part of like the luggage caravan. And Portia tells Marlo, your ass is so huge. That's a good onto the bus. She's like, God your ass is huge. Which is hilarious coming from Portia. And then Marlo like flicks back her hair and it hits Portia in the face and they're just giggling together. And I have to say I like Porsche and Marla's friends. Yeah, it works. It does work.

So Cynthia has a boring announcement, of course. She's like, child, I want to get a tattoo in Tokyo. It's going to be a tattoo of a kitchen island. That way I can stand around myself. Then anyone can feel free to clean it when they need some busy work to do during a scene. And Porsche is like, are you going to get one of their matches with Chris's? And she's like, who's Chris? And Porsche is like, what's your math name?

And they're like, how dare you? And she also ruined Cynthia's chance to say hashtag to heal. Which you know is going to be that damn tattoo. Yeah. No, it's going to be chill. Yeah, it's going to be hashtag chill. It's going to be so annoying. Yes.

And then the portion starts showing up. Herch is like, I got one of Dennis. And so she shows up her tattoo. She's like, it's a cross heart and a dollar sign, which even is like, yes, emoji, neck. Yes. Heart and a dollar sign which even is like yes emoji neck. Yes I just love that it's Jesus loves money like come on And then candy's like now

Thinking Porsche Williams is a fool But you know fool because she didn't put that man's name on the back of her ear. She's smart. She's smart. Well, oh, so I love how excited they are about really everything because they get to the hotel and they check in and everything and the hotel people lead them to where they'll be eating and they have like a pullaway wall and as they're pulling the wall away, Porsche goes, come on wall. Love it. Yes, wow, yes. wall away Portia goes come on wall love it yes well yes come through fuck oh let me see I'm looking up air pollution in Japan because I'm sorry air pollution in Tokyo because they walked in to the hotel and someone goes,

The fresh air, the fresh Tokyo air. Let's start cracking up. It's like, is that really nice? It's like, it's a pretty huge city. I don't think I've ever heard anybody say, wow, that fresh air in Tokyo. The pollution's been tidied up, I feel like. So it's like, this pollution spark joy, it did not.

It's very compartmentalized. I've got a box at the container store, and I put the pollution in there. So there is pollution. It's just been organized. This green cloud is, I folded the green cloud, and I put it vertically in my drawer. Yeah, easily stackable pollution.

I think that's a revolution we could all get behind by the way. We're talking about... We're talking about... We're talking about... We're talking about... We're talking about... We're talking about... We're talking about...

We're talking about... We're talking about... We're talking about... We're talking about... We're talking about... We're talking about... We're talking about... We're talking about... We're talking about... We're talking about... We're talking about... We're talking about... Yeah, I think litter would be much more acceptable if we littered in an organized way.

Yeah, like into trash cans. In the trash actually? Yeah, you know what? Actually, throwing out trash is really tidying up, isn't it? Yeah, it's literally organizing. Now, we have three colors of trash cans, okay? Like we're literally organizing our trash. That mid-lures, like, finally, someone gets it.

The freeway call that said, thank you, finally. Eric condo, I've been doing this all my life. Someone gets it. The freeway called it said thank you finally. Mary Condo, I've been doing this all my life. So they go into this dinner, this dinner place. Amarlo is like, take note Cynthia, this is very nice. Take note for next time you're hosting. And Candy is hangry. Apparently no amount of food on the airplane good say to her because she is hangry and she and they have this like beautiful

You know high-end menu tasting menu that has like a charcoal salmon tartar on it and she's like Rally And I'm doing you experiment right now I'm hungry and I'm not doing you experiment right now Candy it's like not even gonna have any of this and she says if you give me a menu and it starts with charcoal tartar Can't wait for that single drop That's a no that's a no that's a no no no you going out with my girls. That's a no So funny. I just can't believe she's never had sushi. Like why is sushi so weird?

It's so she doesn't seem like it should be that hot. I think it's a charcoal part that was turning her off. I think she was like, but like, no, because she literally said they're like, oh yeah, she gets it. Talking and she goes, that is that cooked or raw. And even smoked and meaning he's like, oh gross. They're all grossed out by

C.C. I know I'm like candy your restaurant owner this is a bad look and then with it even say she's like excuse me but this is oh she said it in the later sushi scene where they're eating sushi again it's like you guys this is not Atlanta sushi okay that's called fried fish sticks or something. It's called, it's just like, that's called like a basket of fried catfish. And Cynthia's like, Jeff, for the first time,

Candy doesn't seem that excited about eating. I said what I'm excited about, that kitchen on over there. I'm gonna get that as my tattoo. And then Will will just wanna fuck my elbow. And Tom is like, guys! I'm gonna get that's my tattoo and then Will will just wanna fuck me out though Tommy's like guys I found us a great asset who's gonna lead us

She's little she's strong She's golden and they're like oh my god I'm like is it gonna be is it gonna be Marie condor herself? Like, like, like, Marie Condor? Is it gonna be like Condor? What's her name Condor, Condor, whatever? I mean, I thought it was gonna be like the frickin' Prime Minister at that point. She was like, who is it?

It was gonna be like Gwen Stefani and her house, you good girls, like, I was getting so excited. I was like, it's Ayah! And it's like perfectly demure lady comes out like hi like like she's like a She's just like hi hi Hello, hello, they're like who this big like who is this who is this yeah, I Like that Tanya Tanya says um well, I had to get us somebody to help us because Eva Swold us how she got arrested over a cultural misunderstanding.

And you even got arrested there with a bunch of other models because they thought they were prostitutes. Yeah. Which is beautiful. You gotta be careful with those cultural misunderstandings. I mean, you wouldn't want to go someplace that says, hi and clothing only and then you bring your swag boutique outfit Let's think of this is more of a high fashion point Hi is in high-batchy She's like there are costumes to tackle so of course just like Well, I'm just like a stripper whatever. So they're all applauding Ia and she's like

I'm gonna be your guys and like the most important thing is be punctual If you are late, I will think you underestimate me and me and he's like, oh honey Being late is disrespectful. That is disrespectful Yeah, she tells us these girls are known for lateness. And then we see an extended montage of the women being late over the years, including that time they all went to see Nini in Los Angeles, which I can't believe is already six years ago. And she scolded them in her driveway and sent them back because they were so late and she was saying, you know, she was just like really

being the authority on why you should never ever be late and I was like, okay, okay, we'll see how this works out. And they had like five clips of people being late for Nini events, which I thought was really a funny thing to have in the canon. Yeah. So, Eva then starts like apologizing. She's doing this like apology speech for not inviting NeNeE, or any of them to Miami, but especially NeNeE, and she just wants to make it up to everyone. And she wants everyone to get something off their chest if they have anything that's on their chest. And she'll just's on their chest and she'll just start why not she'll just start Porsche why did you call me shady yeah and she's like how could you do that you put me on blaster for them everyone it's a character assassination

Porsche's like I don't feel like it was that deep. Oh, of course. And, you know, she's like, yeah, who? You've got to do. Yeah, it was right. Yeah. And Eva is pretty much in trouble with everybody for doing this, you know. Mm-hmm. And she's like, look, you talked,

you literally talked about it to me like a dog. And then when you see her, you're like, I'll make some food for you. And Eva goes, oh, so I'm supposed to yell at a pregnant woman. Is that what pregnant woman is that what I'm supposed to do and since he's like I think what she means is there are countertops and there are islands when you can't use but you're supposed to use the island because it's bigger and that's what you're supposed to use. It's like you're using an abrasive scrub on a beautiful kitchen island. That's what it's like.

Not the end of the world, but also like, why would you do that? And then Marla goes, yeah, well, that scares me because it makes me think, you'll speak behind my back and then be nice to me. And then you're going to, you're going to talk about me like a cat. And they're like a cat. Cynthia who's like the translator for everybody to make us that means let's send a dog. I was like excuse me Cynthia. That's not what that means in my world. It's high praise in my world. And even it's like nobody said I talked about you like a dog. she's like, oh no, okay, nobody said I talked to Matthew like a cat

Yeah, no, no, no, okay He ha he ha, what was we're just gonna do farm sounds now Marlo That's a bunny it's up for the cat. Okay, Marlo It's funny! It's a foot of cat! Okay, more alone. Oh... She has like one of those things where you pull the cord and a different animal comes out. NAY! NAY! It's time for commercial. It's time for it.

Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on! Some days, parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful take on parenting. Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brown-Oller, we will be your resident not-so-expert experts. Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding, and thinking, oh yeah, I have absolutely been there.

We'll talk about what went right and wrong, what would we do differently? And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone. So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to, I love my kid But wherever you get your podcasts you can listen ad free on the Amazon music or wonder a app So Mars Port Marsha Marsha of course it takes me any out of the room with her Check you gotta come with me. I gotta talk to you about something. I have nothing to do with AP base. So they go out out of the restaurant. She's like, okay, I asked

a waiter. I said, how do I say I'm pregnant. It's the cutest waitress ever by the way. She's like, Oh, Pekmit! Ninshin Choo! She was so cute and scared at the same time. I'm confused. Yeah, she's like... Ninshin Choo! Ninshin Choo! I think it's a simple repeat. Ninshin Choo! I have an announcement, ladies.

Choo Choo, choo train. Ha, down. So she's like, see that gone. I want to take that gone. I'm like, you just got a lecture about like respecting the culture and you're pulling a gong off the restaurant wall. Yeah. Yeah. So she and Neenie walk in back with the ladies with the gong and porousha is like, now we're all gonna learn.

Neen, chin, choo. They're like, okay, she's just, it means I'm pregnant. And then everyone, like, Neenie starts banging on the gong, probably driving the sound mix or nuts. I know Neenie is not the person banging on the gong probably like driving the sound makes her nuts. I know nineties not the person to hand the gong to she's like. Yeah, it was also her audition for a reboot of the gong show. Yeah, it's also her going out on stage for the gong show. going out on stage for the gong show.

So everyone's excited and then Porsche's like, so if I've been acting a little crazy, it's cause of the hormones. They're like, right, right. How long have you been pregnant for? How many years now? So yeah, and Cynthia's like, she, she can't hide it at this point because she's popping front and back at this point.

She's, it's true. I mean, it's like the good can't hide it at this point, because she's popping front and back at this point. She's, it's true. I mean, it's like the good earplum back there. It's crazy. She has twins in her butt. Yeah. So then it's the next morning and we just see candy. And she has like a Japanese iron. And like, she's just trying to figure out how to like open it

and use it and understand it. And I could have just like watched an hour of candy fiddling with an iron. It like crashes open and she goes, Cannot. She totally goes to our selling bows too, you know? Oh, so let's see Eva announces that all the rooms are the same, so no one can fight. She's like, you all got sweets, okay? And Marlowe's like, does anyone have flat shoes I can wear?

Carrying me Eva. And she jumps on Eva. And they they're like the cats on your back So funny so let's see here Porsche calls Dennis, but he doesn't answer warning Mm-hmm. Yeah, mm-hmm when the hot dogs away the bun will play Hope you're relishing your time off Dennis Yeah, when the hot dogs away, the bun will play. Hope you're relishing your time off, Dennis. I hope you mustered the strength to call your baby mama back. Call her back. It's getting a little chilly in here.

Don't you want to catch up on everything that's happening in Japan? Listen, if you're going to cut the mustard as my fiancee, so candy and Eva are still low level, I'm excited pun rally. I'm like, okay, I'll do a pun. You do a pun. I think I'm officially done with hot dog. I'm like, uh, fine. I'll resentfully throw another pun in there.

See everyone nice. Yeah, the sausages made. Boo. Yeah. So Eva comes over and she sobbing because her, she just found out her grandfather had a heart attack and now is on life support, which is so sad. And candy is candy.

She's like, you want me to iron you? And candy gives her some words of advice. Candy lost her brother when she was really young. And she's like, yeah, I've stopped crying when people died after that, because I realized that it's just time for them to go. And even it's like, thanks. See, I take your champagne.

Yeah. I mean, I thought that we're gonna bring up AJ. Remember, Candy had a boyfriend, her first season on the show, and then after that season was over, he died. Remember Candy had a boyfriend her first season on the show, and then after that season was over, he died. He got into a fight in a parking lot and died in that fight. And then it talked about it on the show, and she was crying for that.

I'm not trying to be like, hi, you did cry about someone who died, but it just made me think about that. I was like, man, that was so long ago. I know. Luke, I don't know. Back when we were children. I know.

I saw from I know. Banner. We were children. I know. I'm from the slide. Anyway, Candy's consoling her and it's really sad and we all feel bad for Eva. No one wants to get that. It's sort of information. So it's sad. It's a sad time. Yeah, I know, Katie.

It's like, we got a break from cancer this week and then this happens. Come on, show. I think Candy's like, well, if it makes you feel any better, you want to hear something that's funny, I haven't brushed my teeth. You were like, okay, you were the wrong person to come to. I'm taking all your booze. And then we see like candies, Japanese toothbrush, and it's like a diamond shaped robot. It's like, I will open up your teeth and brush them. He's like, oh, candy and Japanese technology. Well, the laughs never end.

So let's see here. Next, they start going to the van. Okay, now it's time to stress out. So it starts off well, 10.45 AM. And like a good handful of the women come down. You're like, oh, wow, look at this. It's like we have, you know, well, Ton is obviously there. Eva's there. We got like, we had like, what candy was there, you know? Um, what was there? I mean, portion got there 10 minutes early.

Yeah, there was like, I was like, wow, I, I have worked to magic on them. They are listening, they are listening. And then no, no. Be more like 30 minutes late, 35 minutes late, 45 minutes late, the mini comes out with like a last hair. I'm like, will you be eating a hobbit on his journey this afternoon, Neenie? Ho, ho, ho, ho. on his journey this afternoon, Neenie. So, and Shemari, I'm like Shemari, you're new.

You're not allowed to be this late, and you haven't said anything for the whole episode. Why are you so late? Why are so late? And then, Candy, of course. She's like, I had to stop at a chick's late. Actually, I read that on the Facebook thread and was cracking

up when they were talking about how people are late. And someone said, remember that time Candy with three hours late because she went to Chick-fil-A? Yes. I forgot about that. So thank you, Facebook. Yeah. So they all arrive very, very late. And basically, they are like, Shamari doesn't show up till 11.47. Shamari is the last one. They're all waiting for her. I'm like, girl, you're gonna get fired from the show.

Yeah, you're too new for that. Yeah, exactly. So they're all talking about what a shitty day they're having because Nini was gotten to fight with Greg because whenever they take off or fly somewhere, they always call the other one to say, bye. And she's like, I couldn't reach him. But then he said, I'm over here doing shit for you. And no, no, no, no, no, which is kind of true.

And I'm sure that she could reach him. What does that mean? I mean, it sounds a little bit too much like Stasi and Patrick's fight last season on Vanderpump rules. I'm like, this is bad. If Neenie is following the footsteps of Stasi, sure,eder. Yeah, but that's like a cute couple fight to have when you've been together forever. Like you didn't call me to say goodbye from the plane?

Yeah, that is kind of cute. So I, I mean, while sitting there in her seat, like just trying to do relaxation exercises, she is like, she's doing this like big fake smile and she is so furious. Like you just know she's gonna bitch about these women with her friends very politely later on, you know. Very politely.

But she's gonna make sure that's compartmentalized into a different part of the day. I know. She's going to open up a little package and then like show her friends her rage and ask them to all touch it. Like, does this, does my rage bring you joy? then be like, yes, like me too, let's always remember this. God. So Marlow comes on and she's mad at everybody.

Okay, meanwhile, Mimi's talking about her husband with cancer and Eva's talking about her grandfather who's on life support. And Marlow's like, no, it even called me to ask you five rubber band or deodorant. Mimi's like, do you want a rubber band? It's like Marlow, there's a front desk. Like, like, how defenseless are you in a hotel? Okay, like, just call the front desk, go down the gift shop. I'm sure there's like a, like a Japanese CVS across the way.

And you've gotten like an adorable deodorant with like a hello kitty on it. Yeah, she's like, people are dying and you have loose hair. So. And then I had no bra. Then I was like, okay, I just wanted to say again, that it's very important to be on time. Please be respectful of others. And Marla just rolls her eyes. Like, we're going to your timing, Aya. Not now, Aya, not now. So then we get to commercial and the best thing ever happens. This commercial

for Mexican Dynasty's comes on. Oh, I didn't see the commercial. I'm excited. That is going to be amazing. When does that start March? It's like February 26th. Really? I'm even knowing that. I'm going to be amazing. Okay can of accents. The preview ends with a maid in a full on maize uniform which I love when people are like still using that black and white maize uniform from like glue the movie. Yeah. But it ends with her in a confessional she goes this family is not normal. I was like glue the movie. But it ends with her in a confessional. She goes, this family is not normal. And I was like, yes. Yeah.

Oh, I'm excited. I'm excited. OK. We need to show like that. We need something to galf on as a problem. And we also just need just for us. It's like so fun to have a new show. Yeah.

Like a new good show, hopefully. Yeah, it looks like it's going to be pretty good. So, so they so now the women are going to this temple and I was like, I had told them on the bus like, where we're going is going to be a sacred place. So please try to be quiet because it's we need to be quiet tourists. And so they can't have the bus and they're like, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah We're tourists. It's a temple. We're going to be an inside a bot. She's not an outside a bot. She right now. You know what I'm saying?

So then they go see the fortune teller and basically this fortune teller's on Bravo have the best record out of any fortune tellers anywhere in the world. I have to say. Like this is like an automata. Some truth. Yeah. This one was like an automated fortune thing. Like they had to like shake a thing and pull something out and put in a thing. And I didn't really understand the process. This is like an automated. It's really awesome. It's really awesome. It's really awesome. It's really awesome. It's really awesome. It's really awesome.

It's really awesome. It's really awesome. It's really awesome. It's really awesome. It's really awesome. It's really awesome. It's really awesome. It's really awesome.

It's really awesome. It's really awesome. It's really awesome. It's really awesome. It's really awesome. It's really awesome. It's really awesome. It's really awesome.

It's really awesome. It's really awesome. It's really awesome. It's really awesome. It's really awesome. It's really awesome. It's really awesome. And it was kind of funny because the producers presented the fortunes like it was the end of the season and I was like, Eva now walks around her house, you know? So so porches was like when spring comes, Willows are in bud, just like flowers, bloom and branches, something happy will come. You will you will poop out a hot dog that will cry mommy one day.

She's like, oh my god. Let's go out to the movies. Let's go out to the movies. Yeah, well you will poop out a hot dog that will cry mommy one day Let's go out to the movies. Let's go out to the movies. Let's go out to the movies and have ourselves some fun. Okay Dog in summer hot dog oh my god I like canes of course. It's like these sticks knew who was coming, you know. Yeah, Caddy's is like Sex tension will be prosperous Your skill will be developed and known to people in the capital in a sling Don Juan is not to be trusted. That's oddly specific And then what was Tania's time? I don't even remember it was there were like

there was something like a burst of many of them very quickly. And so there was something that I didn't even attention to. Oh, I think it was marriage and employment are good because Marla was like bitch, Paul's gonna marry her. See, it says marriage and employment are good. And then he's like, well, what if you want to marry somebody else? Yeah. So, which I thought was like a, I thought I didn't think there was anything to that. I was not really paying attention. I didn't think there was anything to do that either.

And I was always ready to jump on Neenie. But I thought she was making a joke like, yeah, marriage and employment are good. You can marry anybody. It doesn't say him. You know what I think she's being mean. Yeah. And then the evighets one that basically says, the request will be granted. The patient will get well, building a new house and removal are both fine. I'm marriage and, oh yeah, marriage and employment are well, I think that was whatever it was. It was at a certain

point, it did feel a little bit like like in like some sort of like automatic fortune generator, you know, it was like marriage and blossom do well future happiness prosperity. I was like, hmm, okay. So they, they go and they even still very touched because, you know, it's like, sort of creates that you got a fortune about a patient getting better on the same day that you got the news from your grandfather. So they go into the temple and they all, you know, they, they, they give prayers.

It's like very nice. although there's like this weird, like every time one of them gave a prayer, they would like cut to the stock footage of clouds in the sky. It was like a clericin commercial, sort of like trying to burst through the scene, which I think was supposed to be spiritual. It is spiritual and it's nice. I saw fond memories of Joan London and balloons

when I think of clericin. Yeah, Joan London, which leads me to Albrook or when you were still fat. Oh my God, peace. You know what I mean? Yeah, I think I discussed. Joan London's hair these days is crazy. I think I discussed that last week,

but I have to like reiterate it because I've seen that commercial now a few more times. I'm like, Joan London, please. Joan London, please. Get it together, please. Get the goat, please see professional right now. This is like, this is out of control. You cannot be appearing on camera with that crazy hair.

Like, you cannot be doing this. You were Joan London, okay? You need to have a wasp little bob, like the lady who used to be in the Tylenol commercials, okay? Yeah, get more Tylenol, Joan London. So now they go, like after the temple, they go to like a sushi restaurant. And they're there and they're just like talking.

And this is where even it's like, okay, I'm going to show them what real sushi is like, not like cat fried catfish in a basket. So. Candy is so mad that they're there. She is so mad. It's hilarious. And Samari goes, do you guys have a deep fryer? Samari.

Yeah, she's, she really only wants it to like inspire her to write her next song. Deep fryer. So. So Tony is making a small talk with Portia and she's like, um, yeah, you know, if you, if Dennis needs any advice on rings, he should talk to Paul because Paul did a great job, great job. And Portia's like, well, you know, we were having a great time and I said, so Paul, are you guys married and Paul said, yeah. And since he's like, so, are you married? Are you married? Are you not married? What's the field job? Are you married? Are you not married? And John, you're like, do we have a legal piece of paper? No. No.

What is this? Is this another fake marriage? And what is this happened? And when did this happen before? It's like the scandal we never knew we needed and we actually still don't need it. It's like a scandal just like casually traipsed in. Like a camera round the sushi conveyor belt and we're like no you can keep going and she's like I mean I'll be Tentically married no are we legally married no are we spiritually married no do we have a Hibachi grill yes end of story

Not she, Grail? Yes, end of story. That was exciting. Unfortunately, I think that they're secretly married. They're just like, okay, like the secret again, it's like, okay, like things that we have a very little personal investment in is whether or not Tanya is secretly married to God, we saw ones on the show.

Yeah, no one cares. And if they are, she's smart for getting married and then waiting to have a big wedding, you know, so she can still have her big wedding. So she's like, when Paul is my partner until the end, until we run out of gas, and they'll buy you a room naturally,

then I just have to leave him. And then Nini said, well, tread lightly to the end, meaning I think in her own, she was putting, I took it as Neenie putting her own situation and saying, trust me, towards the end, it gets really hard. Wait.

I didn't really know what she was saying. I was like, yeah. I thought she was just saying like Greg, like tread lightly to the end, because Jesus, that's, you know, don't make that promise. We're like making kind of a joke, you know. Yeah. And then Tommy gets mad. She's like, what does that mean? Because you said at the temple, maybe I should marry somebody else. I mean, what are you saying?

Yeah, you act like you're my friend and then you see these nasty things. It's just so rude. It's rude And meanie's like No, but instead of just diffusing it and saying, look, I'm making jokes about myself. I, if I've offended you in another way and you're getting, I'm sorry, but I wasn't being mean to you, you know? But she's not. And she does a typical Neenie

where she's, she gets offended that somebody is offended. And then she starts just getting rude. Yeah, but then Tony is like not clear what she's really mad about. She's like, and you made a joke in a spiritual temple. I'm like, you were filming a reality show in a spiritual temple. So like really, who's who's really committed the worst defense here? Yeah, and Mimi is like, I don't even care if you get married or not. Now do I want you to be happy? And I thought she was going to say, yes, of course you're my friend.

She goes, I don't care. She's like, bitch, I brought you on to the show. Don't turn on me a second time. Okay, you're not gonna get a moment from me at this Sushi restaurant. I already got I am at me and for some reason I feel really invested in that and she's like, I've been married a long time Don't tell me I'm not serious about marriage. I was like, didn't you get your husband for? I wasn't your husband married I was like, didn't you get your husband for, wasn't your husband married? Wasn't you divorced for a while? Didn't you have a whole wedding special,

like three or four years ago? Oh my God, so funny. I love having you. So they're, so they're fighting. They're having this like random sushi bar fight. And then almost I was like, to be continued. I was like, wait, what? Are you really, are we hanging a cliffhanger

on how the, the, the, the, Neenie, Tony Johnny fight comes out? Is it like the most low level to be continued we've ever seen on the show? It is, but I think that they're gonna really make it worth it because the clips from next week are a Nini just losing her shit. And Borsha's like I think she's gonna stab us all! And also I'm so excited for next week because it's the revenge of Ia. I was like you were late one day But no, you're not gonna be late a second day because they apparently they leave Neemie behind because she's late And I'm like oh see I'm I want Ia to join the show

I want to like make her the news can you cast remember because I just want to see her getting mad at people being late all season long Yes, like kind of an interesting Doreet Like Ia is a Doreet that lives within her means. I love punctuality storylines. They really, they really speak to me. Well, we're perfectly on time to end this episode, which is nice. We really are. Thank you so much for being here, everybody. We will be back tomorrow on TV Party Up Streaming Live,

our pump rules recap, and it will also be available on audio for everybody and as the crap ends video on demand to everyone patreon if you want to watch some of our recaps instead of listen to them that's where you'll find them also go get tickets for our live shows second show in Cincinnati second show in Dallas we're also going to Vancouver. Vancouver. Just for that. That's fine. Phoenix, go get George. Take his oak. Hey!

Two more shows. Two more cities. Are going to be announced. Manana. So stay tuned for that. We love you guys. Bye. Bye. Thank you. Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watcher Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music, download

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