Watch What Crappens - RHOBH: Bahama Fleas

Episode Date: March 6, 2019

It's still a Juicy eats Lucy world on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. The Bahamas trip ends with some heavy edits to protect Dorit from her current lawsuits, but who will protect the baby flamingos from being smothered by the love of Vanderpump? To hear this week's bonus episode about Married to Medicine and Abducted in Plain Sight and to find Crappens on Demand video recaps, become a Patreon member at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. ***New Limited Edition Shirts! Countess Luann Warhol Pop Art avail through February! **Crappens Live is coming to Cincinnati, Portland, Phoenix, Boston, Irvine, Milwaukee, and Minneapolis. Find ticket links at watchwhatcrappens.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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And as usual, here I am with my gorgeous Island dead friend and co-host Ben Mandelker, who also created and writes, The Real Housewares of Kitchen Island, which you can find over on the YouTube. Hello, Bian! Hey Ronnie, what's going on? Nothing just excited to be here to record a lovely real housewives of Beverly Hills. How could you hurt me? Recap. Yeah, I'm excited. This is this thing is it's spiraling out of control and I'm into it. I'm into it. So we're going to do that, but quick chill. We are going to be in DC this Friday. So sorry, C-O-N-D-C everybody,

we're going to be doing Grill Housewives of New York over there. We're super excited, bigger show ever. And then we're going to be in Austin, for South by Southwest Tuesday, at around noon, 12.30. So come to that guys. It is bad shoulders are let in first, but we don't think we're going to have a ton of bad shoulders coming to that.

We think it's going to be mostly you mostly you guys if you've RSVP'd Just come RSVPs are let in right after bad shoulders and it's free for you So come check that out. That's gonna be a super fun important show and then Saturday we're gonna be in Cincinnati for two shows one of those shows is sold out But the other one is our happy hour show and that is still open. So get your tickets and come see us in Cincinnati. We're going to have an amazing time of a lot of everybody. This is very, very true. In fact, Ronnie and I will be reenacting the opening credits

of WKRP in Cincinnati. So come for that everyone. You Lonnie I'll be I'll be the guy who played at herb thank you I can be Lonnie it's like the nicest thing you've ever said to me yeah I'm letting you be Lonnie Anderson it's it's my gift to you oh my God that's so sweet unfortunately I'm gonna have to return it to a shelter okay so everybody you're supposed to return Lonnie Anderson to me welcome to another infuriating season of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. We're already, I'm sick of the storyline because I've been reading about it non-stop of the internet, but I'm not sick of it at all because I'm furious about it,

but then I'm also sick of being furious about it. But then more stuff keeps coming out, like John Cessa, who works for Fanta Pump, and is involved in this fight with the other John John Blizzard who's apparently like some 20 year old twink. So John Sessa went on some radio show podcast whatever. I'm sorry. Don't have credits because that's how I am here. Okay. It happens. But he went on and he was going off and he's like, Lisa doesn't boss me around. I'm her partner, not her employee and she doesn't get to tell me what to do. We got in the fight about this. And I was like, dammit, I am bringing it on camera.

I don't care. No one tells me what to do. And he said that he heard from the shelter that a reality star came in to bring this dog in in Orange County, like a real housewife star is something. So it's not looking good for Doreep. It looks like he is basically saying that Doreep actually did take the dog herself. Directly to a shelter. There was no Shelley

Tour. It went directly to. Yes, but that isn't that funny because we're calling the French Shelley Tour, which is the shelter because I mean, I figured she took it to the shelter. My only doubt of that was that she took it to Orange County because I don't see Doreet giving a whole day to driving all the way to Orange County that's far. But she may have gotten lost. I mean, she doesn't even know where to get Pita in Los Angeles, okay? Yeah.

Or flatbread. Flatbread was what she was looking for. I'm like still remembering that one little detail from her first season. I'm like, she doesn't even know to go on a fair facts avenue amongst other places. Yeah. So according to him, it looks like Doreet

actually did take that dog, which makes no sense, except that she was probably taking into to Orange County, figuring that was far enough away that she wouldn't get caught, not knowing if the dog is chipped. Right. Which is so excessive, because she could have also just returned it to VaynerPrompt dogs. But I don't know, for some reason, I don't believe anything that John Sessa ever says, because I don't know, I just don't trust him.

Also when he's like, I am a partner, I mean, we see that Tom and Tom are partners in Tom-Tom and they have like a 5% stake. So being a partner with Lisa Vanderpump is sometimes a little semanticsy, you know? Yeah, true. So I don't know what's true, but I felt our duty to report that half-acidly to our listeners.

Yeah, I also feel like though that like, he may be a partner in Vanderbilt from Dogs, but this is Lisa's show and he's going in there to blow up basically Lisa's spot in a certain sort of way is fucked up and if you're a good partner, you wouldn't do that unless you were a structure too. So like, I don't understand the logic of that. Like, I would never go onto a show and then say something that would make you look really shitty, Ronnie and be like, I don't understand the logic of that. Like, I would never go onto a show and then say something

that would make you look really shitty, Ronnie, and be like, whatever, he, Ronnie can't control me, I say whatever I want, like that's fucked up. If that's your partner, you shouldn't be saying stuff like that that would then make Lisa look terrible. Yeah, so who knows the truth, but there you have it, everybody. So we opened this episode with a very special

opening. Instead of previously, we get like the super, overly dramatic opening of Duret on a beach, like looking out over the beach. I know. She's like, I tried to rescue Dog, and it blew up in my face. She means it literally she once tried to rescue a dog and the dog exploded in her face, and she's been traumatized. It was a horrible experience for her. Yeah. She's like, well, I tried to give the dog to a woman, a fairly low-faza, and it turned out it wasn't the right fit for a family, and to chop it all off, I found out people

had been going to the bin about me. A worse crime. A worse crime of all. People've been gossiping about to read. To read, rewriting her own crimes is hilarious. It blew up in your face, the reats, and then we get to see the shot of PK with a little tiny dot of blood on his nose from the dog.

I mean, come on. You know what? You know what? I blew up in your face, because you didn't follow the rules. You know, it's like being like on the in the heart locker and you decide, you know what, this time, I'm gonna cut the red wire

because I'm sick of cutting the blue wire and then it explodes and you're like, this all blew up in my face quite literally. It's like, yeah, because the instructions were, you cut the blue wire, not the red wire bomb squad jerk. Yeah, she would never be a Charlie's angel like never no people that that shit would just be exploding all over the should be very I can be by the

time you told me to cut the numbers on the crooks I stepped it with an ass like no we told you to cut the blue wire you dope PK this box keeps on talking to me and I don't know why I thought it's a box why is the box talking to me and I don't know why I thought it's just a box. Why is the box talking to me? P.K. P.K. So then we see the clip of Teddy like well then John Sessa or John Blizzard John Sessa, Prancer, talk out and told Kyle about it and Then we got to Teddy has been very dramatic too. She's like, hi, I'm Teddy last night was a hi misshit show

And then I don't understand why Lisa Vanderplum tried to hi manipulate me I was like that's a little bit like overstating it. Basically last night at the dinner, there were like, um, what's going on with this dog? And Lisa was like, well, you know, we, I had an issue with Doreet and, um, but we talked about it and we settled it and Doreet was like, but Lisa, I'm just like, well, you should have returned the dog and that's what have been fine. And I got Teddy Goss, and he's like, oh, that's not really a chit-show. That's just sort of like a conversation. And Doree was a chit-show because she started bawling at the table for no good reason.

Yeah, and everybody else was a chit-show for surrounding her. Like, you are a person to treat. Like, really, tell that to the Bellagio. Is that where she owes money? Yeah, I think it's either the Bellagio or Bellagio that Is that where she owes money? Yeah, I think it's either the Beverly Bay or Bellagio that they owe three million something dollars to from gambling debts. I'm so mad that we did not get to see on camera the situation of the woman trying to a cost to read at that at Bahamara. Yeah, you see, this is the same trip that they're all acting like

to read as the saint. Okay, you just got attacked for like scaring over your Beverly Beach partner and not only that, you have the gall to have a Beverly Beach hat out for filming like the worst. The worst. So then we see a flashback of last night and basically we see Teddy talking with Kyle and Teddy's like I just wish John she basically says I wish John Blizzard had never talked or never told her anything about this. And Kyle goes, you were told for a reason. I'm like, good, good friend Kyle. Let's not forget the role that Kyle has played in all this

because none of it would have blown up. If Kyle hadn't, you know, dropped a whole bunch of things in front of Rina, and then Rina comes over for breakfast sitting on the floor, I'd love that we're sitting on the floor. And then Kyle tells her what's going on with the dog. Like this didn't actually have to blow up. But Kyle blew it up on my face.

Kyle told them everybody and then kept bringing it up over and over. And then she has a nerve to say she fucked her eat and she fucked you. Fuck off Kyle. You're the worst. You aren't you have always been and remain the worst. You know, I hold out hope, I'm sorry, are you guys hearing my Facebook thing going off because I'm like trying to turn it off

and I feel like everyone's checking their phones right now. I turned it off, I'm sorry, stupid person, messaging me on Facebook. It's probably Kyle, you were message on purpose. Yeah, it was Lisa's fault. It was Lisa's fault that your texts were going off during this show. Yeah, I'm sorry, I'm sorry everyone.

But you know what though, I just, so Kyle's basically saying, she's like, Kyle says essentially like, well, Lisa thought that your anger, Teddy again, and Doree would be enough that she'd be able to manipulate you to do things for her, you know? And it's like, I just get mad because especially later on in the episode when Kyle's like,

but I'm in this position. I'm like, it's a position that you, that you not necessarily created, but you definitely poked and moved along and you fed the flames like in this situation right here, you're feeding stuff to Teddy to get make Teddy mad, you know? Yeah. I think that like your little friend Teddy is like, who knows how to be manipulated, but then she's got Rinna and Kyle on either side of her just pushing her best. See, I think enough, I'm not mad at Rinna,

you know why? Cause I think Rinna is having the best time. Rinna's like, yes, I'm just gonna go back after this. I think Rinna is like hilarious during all this cause the thing is this, I get mad at Kyle about this cause Kyle is acting like, oh, but I'm trying to be a good friend.

I'm caught in the middle like, no, you, you are manipulating, but Rinna's just like, oh shit, I got my opening now a good friend. I'm caught in the middle. Like, no, you, you are manipulating. But Rin is just like, oh, shit, I got my opening now. I'm just going for the kill. So I, I am like loving Rinna during this. Well, Rinna is cracking the up during this, but she's wrong as hell. And she's obviously just using this, you know, and she's like blatantly doing it, which I guess is why it's easier to be less mad at her. But I'm mad at her too. This is bullshit. You know, once again, here we go, trying to bring somebody down without proper bringing down material. Okay, you're failing again.

Okay. And then she brings up the munch house and thing again, which is like, I have been through this exact same thing. Yeah, you guys were talking shit about someone behind their back and you were the one who went on camera and said it, you can't blame everybody else for shit that you do. You know, and this is, and now this is what Teddy's trying to do. No one made you go tell everybody, and no one made Kyle do it either. Okay? We don't have any clips of Vanderpump doing that.

We have a clip of her employee doing it, but you guys were still the ones who chose to take that ball and run with it. So I do not feel for you. You lose it. Yeah. Yeah. But then Solisa, Lisa does herself know favors because she always defends herself in the most guilty sounding way. She's like, why would

my friends think I'm out to get to read? Why? I'm not the one who brought it up at the dog center. I have gone out of my way not to talk about this publicly. Which it reminds me. I don't know if you saw the Whitney, did you see the Whitney documentary? Nope. Well, there's a part where LA read very famous music executive. They cut to him and he goes,

I had no idea this was going on with Whitney. And you're like, okay, sir. It's like, Lisa's like very like, Joe I Denials. I had no idea, I'm the LA read of my circle Like okay, all right, Vannipom I'm trying to root for you here like you're not doing yourself any favors Why there is a knife slicing my heart after everything can I've done for you? Why would why would my friends think I'm out to get to eat just because I spent two seasons defending her stupid ass

While she talked by my back saying I'm a jealous friend. Why would that have bothered me? And then they cut to a clip of the night before them walking through the hotel and to eat like it was never about Lucy Says Delisa and Lisa's like, but of course it was all about Lucy's safety It's like it was never about to of course it was all about Lucy's safety. And she's like, it was never about the safety. It was about me. What was your argument here to reach? I know. I was like, I actually think it was about the dog.

That's why we're in this mess because he didn't follow protocol and the dog wound up where it was not supposed to wind up. And you messed up and she's mad at you. OK, and you know what? This is how she deals with her anger. OK, she's just going to try to make you messed up and she's mad at you. Okay, and you know what? This is how she deals with her anger. Okay, she's just gonna try to make you look like an idiot but now you guys are all mad. Like God forbid, is it a nice thing

to make someone look like an idiot? No, it's not a nice thing. It's something we should never aspire to do. But in the world of passive-gressive reality show, you know, like a part of war, It's fairly standard. So I don't know why they're so upset right now. Yeah, just just ended already. Just do what you did before. Say you're sorry and drop it. Okay, what does it have to be this a big huge thing that doesn't even involve anybody else? I'm tired of being mad. I'm tired. I'm into it. I'm tired now. Okay.

I'm super into it. I am super super into it. I'm so into it I can't explain why I just am into it. I'm so into you like to me. So So now it's like the next day and everyone's gonna do their their their activity So Doreet and Denise are gonna go snorkeling with like Rina and Camille and then Erica and Teddy are gonna go play golf and Erica by the way when she calls up Teddy to go snorkeling with like Rina and Camille. And then Ericka and Teddy are going to go play golf. And Ericka, by the way, when she calls up Teddy to go play golf, she is wearing so much makeup. I don't know if the glam squad was like out at the breakfast buffet or something like that. But like something went awry with Ericka's makeup.

Ericka's glam team, Erick glam squad does not know how to do makeup for the sunlight. Because Ericka is never in the sunlight You know, it's like forward in the morning, you know gay club makeup Like I like great black light It was definitely some drag queen golf situation to have day. I'm like, you know what? I think I understand why she brings them around because if she's doing it on her own and this is what happened Okay, maybe she needs some help Yeah, I doubt she doing it on her own and this is what happened, okay, maybe she needs some help. Yeah, I doubt she did that on her own. No, I think that was probably like, we're gonna go for a look. We're gonna be like golfing fabulous Michelle, Juan, oh Michelle, Juan's a Michelle you. Okay, never mind.

I can't, you know what? Let's just move on. Yeah, I was gonna try to make like a female golfer reference and then I think I went to female figure skater and then I just decided that my analogy was as bad as the makeup. You're already wrong with female. Okay, you just need to stick with drag queen. I think that was your first mistake. You know, which dude does Erica look like dressed up as a woman? Okay. We need to be. So Vanderpump calls Kyle and she's like, Kyle, hello, it's Lisa van the pump shot through the heart and dying, bleeding all over my first phone case. And Kyle's like, let's go shopping.

So then, Rina, Denise, Camille, Doreet, go to this place where you do your own smoothies by spinning around on a bike. Yeah, exactly. And so they do that and look, and they're like, wow, this is so, this is so, this is a big, really LA idea. You know, maybe, maybe I'll do this. That's great.

Entrepreneurialism, shark tank. So then, the only thing that was no worthy about this for me was that when they finally got their drinks, Camille got hers, she's like, wow, another giant. Wow. Doesn't even finish saying drink. It's a giant. Yeah, it's a, no one's gonna say it for me. Okay, I'll just try love

Yeah, so they're trying to make this the most exciting scene ever, but it's like kind of painful and really just How are you? Thank you. Hi, I'm Teddy. I have to say, by the way, in general, you know, we're already like sort of riled up, but I'm going to come from a place of positivity. Thank you, Erica and Teddy, for going golfing and not giving the usual, oh my God, we're on a golf car and we're driving so fast and going over curbs and being crazy. Thank you. It was so nice to not have that little like quote unquote comedy montage moment with the golf cart Kind of but then Teddy ruins it by falling down when she's trying to swing the clubs like whoops I found so bad it golf

It's like all right you two you're turning her into a reza be careful That's so reza that is so me falling down when they're trying to go call for such a white lady sport what the hell so now i'm rena rena and her crew are now on a boat and and rena like turns to to read and it's like, how are you feeling after last night when what your own irresponsibility was thrown in your face, but you were still somehow the victim. How do you feel? Oh.

Oh. I just have to point out that before this is they get to the boat. She's like, they need to be ready for this. Hi. Hello, how are you? Oh my god, just get on the boat already.

Okay, Jesus. It's the lesser known Spike Lee movie. Get on the boat. God, just get on the fucking boat already, Spike Lee. He finally went to Oscar. It's a movie about rimmages going somewhere and not announcing hello to like half of the population before she gets to get on the catamaran and then sailing away.

He's like, this is what it took. This is what it fucking took. So to read, never one to be over dramatic is, guys, I feel like I've been run over by a truck. A truck that's been driven by dogs that were left to places that had beautiful families. Oh, and to me he's like, ah, can I say something? I'm confused.

I don't even hear the story. I mean, I work with rescue sometimes, you know. So here's my question. Did you mention Alisa that his dog was having a hard time? I'm saying, oh, Alisa, it bit pick here. Now here's the story, girls. I adopted a dog previous to lose Madder and madder bit Phoenix and the face

Like um you keep getting tiny little puppies and all puppies do is bite and play okay. What the hell? Lady also like maybe train them or maybe teach your children not to get in their faces or separate I don't know I I feel like at this point like two biteers in a row, I mean dogs bite, they do bite and it's a thing. But like also, you know, you also can't just like plop a dog down into your life and expect to, especially a rescue to just be like, oh, the dog will be fine. Like, you have to like, no, how to deal with the dog, I feel like. Well, when she says that Maddie Bitt Phoenix on the face, when it goes, no, she's just hearing all those for the first time you know she's

just so shocked. So, we took back Maddie and I spoke to Lucy. I spoke to Lisa the day after she'd gone after we took Lucy home right after I spoke with Lisa and Camille's like um but that's the issue. Lisa probably would have liked to know before you took the dog and three because I don't understand. Yeah, come here. I was like, OK, so before you're

about to break the rules of your contract, Lisa probably would have liked you to call in. So she could have said, don't do that because the dog will wind up at a kill shelter. It will be killed, which is the exact thing. We're not trying to do, you know, right to read yeah, I'm curious Just like no, you don't understand. It's not about that at all I Didn't feel like I didn't deliberately call Lisa with speak all the time and she's like, um, yeah

That's what I'm saying you should have told Lisa she's no That has nothing to do with it. I'm like, that's the whole point of the entire fight. You fucking in with. Yeah, especially and can you say with the fact that you do speak all the time means that like it's even weirder that you didn't tell her that this was happening. It makes it seem even shadier, which is not really what Camille said, but she was basically getting a shady. She said, I know all the ladies are mad at what Lisa did, but what about what to read it? That's what I read. And it's shady.

Yeah, you know, like, you know, it's just like a very sad that they talk a lot of time, and yet you can come to build enough to say something, and it's just like a friendship that's falling apart. It's falling apart. Seren is like, well, if I were you, I'd be very upset that Lisa Vanderpump created all this fucking bullshit. Okay. God. Yeah, she yeah, Rena like works herself up until she gets so mad that she gets up and starts dancing. She first she does her laughing where she claps and falls back and then she springs back

forward into a dance. Yeah, she starts doing the Lisa. Lisa, Renee had like five dances in this episode. Yeah, it was like this is how happy she is watching FenderPump go down. I never mind. And I do want to just, there was one thing, we kind of, we pretty much addressed it, but I just want to say about what Camille said in her interview. She specifically said, like, you know what? Everyone's upset about what Lisa did, but what about what Doreet did?

Okay. I know you said that she said that that's when she said the shady part, but I was like, it was really happy that someone actually articulated that. Because I was like, that's what I've been thinking this whole time like yeah like yeah Lisa's being shady but what about Doreen? Doreen does something wrong. Doreen does something wrong. Getting mad. Getting mad. I'm doing a run-over here too. I'm doing like my my faux-mic Jagger dance like oh dancing and Camille goes, okay, let's all dance.

No, you're not included Camille, sit down. Camille's already like found like a railing so to grab while she spins her hair around, but left them right. So, Carl and Vanneve meet the shop. And this is basically a Van der Prumpe avoidance scene, because she's-

It was amazing. Yeah, here we go again with Carl trying to talk shit and Van der Prumps just like like let's have a fun shopping scene did I mention that my phone case is made of food I'm hilarious and Carl's like but what about to reach like no Carl can we just talk about it later let's talk about that in a minute shall we I mean it shall like everything that Carl said was like deferred for some like other minutes like Lisa do you like this dress let's talk about that in about that in a minute. Shall we? Okay? That adds on to your last minute when there's a penalty minute ad on that so three minutes from now. We'll talk about that

But Lisa four minutes now Kyle will not stop she and Lisa just gets cranked Kyle can we just have a good time and talk about this later? And she's like, um, okay, well, look at these earrings. So what about to read, huh? That was crazy. Like, no one even ate. All right, Kyle. I mean, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me just make something clear. I'm not gonna talk about this until I'm in front of a baby flamingo, in which case I can make a devastating analogy. I wish Vanderpump would just go you stole Kim's house every time Kyle says she wants to talk about it like every time try

I'll try to bring it up. I just want to hear house dealer Yeah, exactly so today I'm Erica and Erica and and Teddy are on their golf card again. Erica is also getting this all up. And again, I think we said it last week, Erica is basically the sapling left over from

Yolanda and she's growing into Yolanda proxy. And so Erica is asking, she's like, why would Lisa pit the reet against Teddy, you know, uh, and she's like, I just think that it's a well-organized plan to turn two women against each other. And Teddy. And let's talk about how you're going to yell about the front and everybody tells you that. Oh my god. Uh, and Teddy is like, I know a hundred percent that they were% that they were told to tell me,

meaning John Blizzard and John Sassos, like dun dun dun. And then it goes coming up and you just see like this baby flamingo running towards Kyle. I'm a tonal shift there. Yeah, so this is where Derrick is like, do you just say it again and again and tell me, listen to you? I don't care. I don't give a fuck Landipop's hot Teddy was a punk, but she made a critical mistake Yeah, Erica like this is like Erica civil rights moment. She's like listen, Teddy. You got used you tell your story

No matter how many times if she says at 100 you said a hundred times also This is so over dramatic I'll tell your story about like texting with John Blizzard come on This is huge people it's huge and teni's like I didn't want to have to pull out proof and she's pull out the proof Just make sure your screenshot it so that you can always see two sentences and that doesn't incriminate you. Alright, how they? Yeah, exactly. So meanwhile, Rina's group goes snorkeling and they're the music's like all excited.

And then like, it just sort of dies out. And as we realized, there's like nothing in the waters. And I was like, I've done a lot of snorkeling baby and I own it. Okay a lot of diving and you always see something Okay, but there's nothing Not a baby fish not a turtle not a little snail It's clear Lisa band-a-pump manipulated all away all the sea life Have rude someone got take her down. I know she's like see life. I rude. Someone got to take her down. I know she's like, Hi, first, how are you? At least abandon pumps of bitch, right?

We're not part of this. They just went to the other part of the ocean. Like you're on your own, bitch. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crap and commercial. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on. Some days parenting is unbearable. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, someday, parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful take on parenting.

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to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. So if Vander Prumpe and Kyle go to this Kavanaugh and they sit down and Vander Prumpe's like, hello, lady who works at this place. I heard that there were little baby fluffy flamingos here. He is bring one over so I can make I love it and then understand what it's like to raise a baby flamingo dog. I cannot wait to floor-kire with my flamingo trick So then they order and kind of Vanderprop's like cheers. We're not talking about anything upsetting and

Kyle's like okay cheers, you know last night that whole thing was so weird You know what these are really chiming in and I mean we're close and obviously I'm gonna tell you the other side of what it looks like And she goes all right, what's been said all right? I've got wine coming just spit it out It's like Teddy she feels set up. I have no idea how she would feel set up, except that I just sat there and told her, you totally set this up to make her look stupid. But I mean, it's totally confusing to me, you know, so.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Oh, where's that baby from? I need it right now, right now. Baby from me, go, baby from me, go. Mm-hmm. Cuckaw, cuckaw, cuckaw, that's the code word. What you should. So let me go. Let me go. Go go go go go. That's the code word. So let me see a flashback of Lisa talking to John on the phone.

And he's like, I'm not your employee. I'm your partner. You don't get to control what I say. I'm sorry, Lisa, which sounded a little staged. It sounds like she actually controlled. She's told him to say that, which is her control. I don't think she told him to say it. I really don't. I think that she probably did what she always does what she's like oh

John Sessa I can't believe this happened to a dog that you hand-reared But I'm a good friend and I don't want it to come out on camera By the way the cameras are going to be here Monday 3 p.m. I'm sure hope this doesn't get out on camera Please please whatever you do I always get out on camera Yeah, she probably just has reverse psychology and everyone I my theory has always been ever since the magazine part I always feel like Lisa like yeah, I think there's probably a part of her that Definitely loves that that he went and said it, but I always feel like she doesn't, I don't feel like she just sits

there and says, you do this, I feel like she just sort of like laughs, like, oh yeah, if you set that on camera, I'm sure that it gets a real rise out of that, a real rise. I always feel like she, like, in my mind, she's suggesting this is a joke and then people are like, okay, I'll do it, and then they do it, and then it causes shit shit to happen And they're like, well, she made me do it and she was just making a joke Well, so I am the one that the American run all these businesses because instead of just bossing people around She makes them think everything's their idea, you know, and that's good business running. Okay boss Yeah, that is good. I just can't imagine her being like, John, all right 3 p.m The cameras are coming so bring the dog out and then we'll do this and then we'll do that. Yeah. So me while back on the boat, Denise Richard

is still in the dark. She's like, okay, okay, I've got a question. All right, I'm still so confused. A, where are we? B, who are you? And C, what's this dog situation again? Like, all right, all right, here's the situation again. Well, actually, you know, in this case, Denise was wondering, why would, why would Banderpump actually do this? And Rene is like, you know, they're like, wow, da, da, da, da, and Rene, Rene goes in, you didn't do anything to eat. Okay. You were doing what was right for your children for God's sake, for your children. I'm like, they weren't bound to be shipped off to like another country, okay? You pretend your children are hundred percent baby and if she doesn't understand that you say fuck you old woman

That talk was cool job Yeah, and this is where she starts dancing. I guess we got our our yeah, this is where she starts dancing I guess before the red of restaurant the point isn't it she should have kept the dog no matter what people okay God so then to read goes I love My god, she's like turning into just like a Toyota commercial. Yeah So then fanner pop made a good point. She's like I couldn't possibly say to delete it I didn't say that Teddy instigated it. We were all there. John did it We saw it. He was out of order. I'm like, okay, you know everyone's wrong here

You're all ridiculous on this show. Yeah, so then we go back to the baby flimmy goes and Vanderprumps like oh Let me ask you baby flimminga razor You just said that these are your children. Now you say you're the parents because you hand preamp them correct. Are you listening Kyle? Are you listening Kyle? Follow along. See, it's Kyle. That's how John says that feels. And she's like, oh godly such a guy. You don't understand that. Are you not torn apart by the analogy? Does it not devastate you to the core? He is like a flamingo razor. A flamingo razor! Now, flamingo razor lady, please turn this little baby flamingo into a new phone case.

That, thank you! Notice that this is not just a flamingo, it's an unbroken bed. Thanks to its mother. So then Erica, okay, this is like, I guess they're telling Erica they need to show Tom more or something because this is the second time she's brought Tom up like she's still relieved of this marriage. The first time was when she was golfing, she's like, God of fun, it's story fun. Tom wanted to take my golfing so he was teaching me and I didn't better than him. I made albums. Perfect. I said, we're never golfing together again in that funny. I was like, no, it's sad. And then now she's like, no, no, no, Tom, it's my miracle. Your wife, did you just lay enough to play? Wow. Oh, I want to keep you. He's like, go to your room there, the fucking A!

There was just so much love on that phone call. She's like, hey, how are you? Good. Yeah, we're here. We have a great time. Okay. Well, it's nice here. Great.

Are you okay? Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. I'm just, do you remember to record Judge Judy? Wow, I was gone. I just wanted to make sure I see BS has played up so I could bust the good fight. Yeah, I guess. Well, good talk. Because I did you run out of money for the pool tile budget that I gave you three seasons ago. Why are you calling me?

He's like, listen, I'm at my booth in Morton. So we wrap this up. I love you. Yeah. That was sad. So then Denise calls her kid. It's cute. And then everybody's getting ready for dinner.

And this is where we get a close up of the Beverly Beach hat, which really makes me want a barf. But also, it's kind of funny that the cameraman did that because this is probably the same day that Tariq got yelled at about Beverly Beach. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly.

So Lisa calls Teddy and invites her to, well, she bases like, can we talk? talk and so Teddy's gonna come over to the room So then there's like a there's like a there's like a very Teddy knock on the door like knock knock like she narrates her own knocks at least Am I here for an apology or to get an apology? Hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, Gecko, I was told Lisa wants you to know about this dog. And she's saying that like she says, Lisa gave explicit instructions to John Blizzard to tell Teddy. And Lisa goes, no, no, I did not give this instructions. I just merely left a few notes around saying someone should tell Teddy and someone's name rhymes with lizard, lizard. Oops, I guess I said his name out for outright.

Well, this is where I started getting this is fishy this conversation, okay. Well, I mean, it's always fishy, but every time I'm like, wait a minute, what? Because she goes, all I know is your involvement is when John Blizzard told you something on Monday and Teddy's like, um, I don't know what the day was and that's not the point And she goes, well, I know what date was and she's like the third point Lisa, which kind of I thought it was the other way around I'm afraid it's no because there's there's this timeline going around of when shooting was and everybody's being very specific about what day Everything happened because they're insinuating that Teddy is taking everything out of order to try and make Lisa look bad Well, but I don't know what it is because I didn't read the timeline because I don't want to be spoiled But it's just I'm just pointing out that they're all specifying these days and Teddy's like that's not the point

She's like, but it kind of is the point, you know So then she's like, but and then Teddy's like you gave them directions to call me She's no and so then Teddy's like the idea that Lisa didn't have her stuff call me is obscene and it's a bold facelight and I have proof so she tells Vanderpomps so you never wanted me to know and you never texted Doree Teddy knows and she was well I did text her I said Teddy knows and you should talk to John and get ahead of this right and because and because Lisa's like well of course I told Dari because you guys have a tenuous history and like of course I'm gonna say like you should like talk to Teddy before it becomes out of hand right which is basically what you just said and if I hadn't told Dari then I would be to blame for not telling to read yeah so long story short Teddy pulls up the John blizzard text

which is already ridiculous that we have to look at text from John Blizzard of all people. So she pulls up these texts to show that like John Blizzard said that he was told, etc. And Lisa is like, I don't have any communication with John Blizzard. Ever! I don't even have his phone number. I don't even know who he is. What is he blizzard? Is he like a snowman?

Who is this person? I don't know who he is He's only 22. I don't call anyone under the age of 37 The only person I call who's under 30 is Pandy, but honestly, she's about 45 in reality So Teddy's like, um, I think that you're creating shit because you got busted and she's like, all right, Teddy She goes so really so that's not fair Teddy because it's your story straight. So Teddy is just like pissed and she's she's also throwing a damn fit. And he's like, wow, So then Teddy marches over to Dereach like, I'm not doing this to read. Okay. I'm not taking this in the dinner

This is not there. And she's like, what'm not to read this to read. Okay, I'm not taking this into the dinner. This is not there. She's like, what did I do? Yeah The read has that like gobs smack look on her face like she just saw Yeti run through the hallway. Oh, PK She's like, I'm telling you the same thing I said last night. You did nothing wrong to read She's you're much smarter than you pretend better, Pomp. You're not confused and I'm not gonna be your pawn to get it to read And so then Teddy storms off and Drikas, thank you Teddy and then Lisa gives Drik such a nasty look. I'm sorry, did I just hear that? Did I hear the sound of a trade on my mists?

Yes she does. She looks like she's gonna smack her. By the way, isn't it possible? Like, first of all, why is everyone putting so much faith into fucking John Blizzard, okay? This guy is, I mean, like, as there ever been like a clear fame whore. But I base that on him working in bed and pump dogs.

But still, like, why are we putting so much faith into what he says is the absolute truth, honestly? Why? Second of all, isn't it possible that like said something like, oh, they're talking about the dog being back, and John Blitzer said something like, oh my god, I'm just texting a teddy. I'm told, is it cool if I mention it? I'm totally so like, oh yeah, sure.

What's the big deal, right? I just feel like it's, maybe that didn't happen, but it's conceivable that Lisa was like, yeah, sure about something. And then John was like, yes, she told me to tell you, like, I don't know. I'm just like very suspicious of John Blizzard. Mainly because his last name is Blizzard. Let's, I'll be honest. That's what it all comes out of.

His name is Blizzard. It's not a real name. Okay. He's not a real person. He's a robot. And I don't trust any of his motives. Well, did we actually say what the text was because Teddy whipped out her phone at one point and she showed a screenshot of the text. And it was a tiny little screenshot that of course, like I said earlier, cut out everything except two lines of the text so that Teddy wouldn't incriminate herself. And we find out

why she would do that later on in this episode. Yeah. But it basically says, Teddy says, did Lisa tell you to tell me? And he says, yes, right? Yeah. It's basically that. Which, you know, Teddy is definitely playing both sides of that even then to say, like, did Lisa tell you to tell me this? You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Exactly. Look, the point is, Dari did bad and to think that this isn't going to come up on camera as ridiculous. But then everybody else's point is that if Lisa wanted it on camera

She should have just done it herself But then Lisa did do it herself by putting it on camera with Dereet and PK at lunch where she said you guys shouldn't have done that You should have brought it to me and there's a fine and blah blah blah And PK said no well, there's not a fine because we're your friends and that's why you forgive us and you don't ask questions because we're your friends That's the end of it So she gave them plenty of a chance to look like idiots, you know Yeah, I'm there So so now

So now we're so now there's like a scene of Kyle calling Mauricio Because she found two Rolexes and she's like um well, you know ever we were robbed, like I knew I would never get that jewelry back, but I wasn't just gonna go buy any jewelry. I'm just gonna fill it up piece by piece. And so, you know, I wanted to get something from me, so I'm like, wow, like, what am I supposed to be feeling about this? Am I supposed to be like an awe of your glamour

or am I supposed to be just like, what? Like, like, I don't know. I was like, this is, what is the end game with this scene? Cause it's not making me feel very good about your Kyle. No, it's just what Kyle does. Every fucking scene is in Beverly Hills. The way my city or it's about her money or her businesses, which are now I think to fuck.

So now we've just pretty much got our money. So Teddy returns to her sweet, where she shares with college. She's like, hi, I'm Teddy. I forgot my key. Hi, I'm Teddy. I forgot my key. Hi, I'm Teddy. I forgot. Oh, hi, I'm Teddy. Thanks for opening the door. And Kyle's wearing this terrible ruffle dress with little metal holes all over it. Oh, it's, she looks like a really

terrible tent. Yeah, that makes no sense. Terrible. You know, like the, it has those hooks that tents have that you like hook all the sticks together. Yeah. A little metal hole sticks. Okay. So anyway, Karla's like, um, yeah. So anyway, she's like, oh my god, that face. And Teddy goes, yeah, well, this is a face of irritation.

Listen, Carl, how clear were you with Lisa today? Karla's like, I'm very clear. I was very clear that I'm very clear. I was very clear that I'm very confused and I have no idea why everybody's so angry, even though I keep telling everybody how angry they should be. Okay. Exactly.

So, and Teddy's like, I just, I don't want to be fake a dinner. I can't be fake a dinner. I'm like, okay. Now, listen, Teddy. I actually like Teddy a lot. I really do like Teddy. Teddy Bear has really grown on me over the past season and four episodes.

And I understand that's a very admirable impulse. But it's also kind of like being just like part of, like just being an adult. Like you just sometimes just like, just deal with it. It's kind of like, you know what, you're annoyed at her. She's being a bitch. You feel like she's being a bitch, just whatever. Like, like, you have fun despite her. Don't sit there like a teenager being like, ah, mom was mad at me. You know, just like,

please, you know? Well, she doesn't. She just tells her off at dinner instead. So vendor profiteries, yeah, vendor profiteries. Sooner Vanderpuff and the reason yeah Where's what she's saying is that I told my employees to tell her about it so that she would tell everybody and get you in trouble and Dureka's Is it truly so just Because you know me want to drop things immediately and not say mad about them forever and ever. Lisa, have you seen Errikas vagina Lisa? Lisa, if you tell me the truth, we can just bury it and then I'll spend the rest of the season talking about how you betrayed me once. That's all Lisa.

And she's like, it's not true how many times I have to say it she goes don't Bliss had his trying to stop shit and I don't like that I've got to figure this one out So think Kyle and Teddy have trouble walking over this bridge because they're all wearing expensive shoes You know and then for now trying to get over the bridge She's like fuckers. Oh God Hi bridge fuckers Had bridge whoa you know that there was like there had previously been some sort of like thing over that bridge So it's like fine to walk over to like you know You know the staff was like you know fuck these women take that off make them struggle

Yeah, at least a van der pub's like listen here You didn't hear it from me, but my assistant girl to ask you to take the covering of the bridge The baby flamingos are just doing their own version of a hundred one Dalmatians. They're all like communicating across the island. So Camille and Eric are coming to dinner. Camille is like, yes Camille, let's have a good time. It's a good time, sister is coming. So everyone, everyone arrives at the table eventually. And my favorite part, I think of this whole episode, was watching Lisa and Teddy have this glare war,

where they just kept staring at each other from across the table, just like narrowing their eyes. It was actually so amazing. I could have watched an entire episode of just just random pattern happening, with the two of them emits did all just staring like you little bitch my teddy bear my ass. Hi, I'm Teddy and I'm glaring. Currently, Chef Joe is grinding up your brother and turning him into tonight's sausage

special bitch. I gave your brother a bar back position in Tom Tom aka the domain of Nick Elaine So yeah Teddy's giving her this like really dirty look and Vannar props just looking back like yes, Teddy So to re-coms and she's in full victim modechi's like, THINK YOU! THINK YOU LADYS! THINK YOU'RE FABIEN! LADYS! THINK YOU'RE FABIEN! Okay Dary, you can just calm it down. At least, Sami, while it's also invicting mochi's like, oh no one's even acknowledging me, I feel as welcome as a turd and assuming pool or let me explain this better a defeat in assuming pool I

Feel like to reach in pk in a loan office So yeah, she's upset no one's acknowledging her and Erica showing her class over there. They serve a backer on a tiny plate and someone goes, what is that? And she gets it's a backer room, baby. Yeah. Do you know the difference between a macaron and a macaron? I am more than five for you. I was like, I don't hung up on you. And this it was like a savory macaron. If something's like a bacon one or whatever. And Denise, which is just staring at it like, and you guys got any fries or grilled cheese,

like, what's the, like maybe a burger, I don't know, like what is this fancy food, you know, I, listen, I was married to Charlie Sheen for crying out loud, like, you expect me to eat this? Last time I said, who do I gotta blow for French fries? I ended up in a five year marriage, so I'm not gonna ask that, but you got a kids menu, ah, yeah. So then Dor not gonna ask that, but you got a kid's menu. Ah. Yeah.

So then Dorit is gonna do a toast and, you know, she's basically, so there are first, first everyone raises their glasses for cheers. And there's this great moment. This was like the closest that anything on Bravo has come to like a British drama, caution drama, you know, like this was like a full on, like it should have been like Melda Staunton

and like Emma What's her face and they and like basically like Lisa goes like it's a like a warm like cheers Teddy even though I'm Madaguri I still my teddy bear look and Teddy bear like looks at her like hmm and Lisa's like oh I'm gonna start to smile then Teddy looks away and he's just like just smile and then Teddy looks away and he says, oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!

Oh! And Rin is like, cheers to Tovete and wonderful trips and me not having to start another scene. Is anybody gonna yell at each other? Yeah. Yeah. So they're all sitting there awkwardly. And Kyle gets her Rolex postmated to her.

Yeah. She's ordering her Rolex on postmates, which is kind of hilarious. So, um, uh, so, so me all is Rolex on postmates. It's just kind of hilarious. So me on an asking all Vanderpump, but basically everyone's just ignoring her, you know, yeah, so someone asked Teddy how her day was and she's like, well, hi, I'm Teddy and the first part was good, but man, second part, not so good and I'm not gonna sugarcoat it and anything, everything is hunky-dour because I'm not a fucking fake. It could see everyone was like, read the sigh of relief. Like, thank you for not sugarcoating it.

We've already had too many carbs today. Yeah. And when she says, I had a good start, but then it wasn't good. And it's like, um, you don't want to talk about it. Come on, talk about it, please talk about it. Where people do cocaine Katie your cabana No one literally no one has anything else going on at this table please talk about it

So here the fish weren't here So when she's like yeah, look I need a fake so to read cuz Titi I believe you're right now, and I want you to know Titi. I believe everything that you've said. And Vanderprom's like, sing! Like her eyes give the top chef sing. And Teddy's like, thank you. Because this feels really icky right now. You are the one making it icky. Okay. No matter who made you fucking say something about it, you are still the one who said bring out that fucking dog.

Yeah. No one made you do that. Yeah, exactly. I don't know. It's like you feel icky about it. I don't know. It's like, you feel icky about it. I don't know. You were still the one who said bring out that fucking dog. Yeah. No one made you do that. Yeah, exactly. I don't know. It's like you feel icky about, I don't know.

To me, it's like, it's such a stupid thing to feel icky about. Like you feel like you're manipulated to like play a part in the dog drop. I guess here's the thing. It's like Teddy didn't actually do anything, right? Like the whole thing is that Teddy feels like Lisa was trying to use her to get mad at Doreet, but the thing is that nothing happened. It was the dog was brought out. Now we find out why Teddy is so mad because we'll be find out soon.

We'll wait for it. So at this point in the show, yeah, it's like, well, but nothing really happened. You didn't tell Doreet Lisa and that's what is infuriating about this because they're like if Lisa wanted to do it she should have done it herself but Lisa ran in her parents and before anybody told anybody she took Doreet and PK lunch to tell them and have a conversation on camera so that's why all of this has no air in it and Teddy it makes no sense that she's so angry and Tobi Ed so she's like do some? So then Vanderpump puts it perfectly when she's like,

to read stands for nothing. Oh, toasting the wonderful Teddy. How about have some loyalty to the friend that's had your back for two years? And then they show a clip of Vanderpump standing up for stupid to read. But I think it's actually code for the fact that like when Doree came on the scene, people hated her.

And I think probably other, and she was also like, other castmates didn't like her. And I think that like Vander Pump really stood up for Doree and PK when, I mean, I think the audience still is like, Doree, but I think, I think we are all sort of like, are like, amused constantly by Doree being so Doree-ish. But I think in the beginning, people hated Doree a lot more. And Vander Pump stood up for her and like, Doreet was very unpopular and Vanderpump basically gave like, no, she has my seal of approval. And so she's basically saying like, um, I brought you on the show, I protected you, I kept you on the show, and this is how you repay me. Well, and it's also what happened with Teddy because no one would have talked to Teddy

last year. Teddy was fighting with Erica and she was fighting with Duret. You know, like where would she have been? And basically also, because I mean, I do think that that Vanderpumble like still wants to give Duret the business for the shit she was saying last year, which is, I, cause I do think that some of this really is true.

But she's, I think that's her way of basically being like, you know what, like I was loyal to you. And then you talk shit about me behind my back last season. So I'm going to give you the business. It's more like, like, this is, I don't know. I'm so confused in my own thoughts right now. I guess I would be totally on board with that theory,

except that Doreet actually did something like a week before filming. Like, if this was all coming from some random thing that probably didn't even happen, but we know Doreet did the, dude, she did the deed, you know? Yeah. So it's like, did Vanderpump conspire to give Doreet a horrible dog knowing that Doreet would return it to a shelter to make her look bad on TV?

I mean, that's how far back you have to go if it's like a real conspiracy, you know? Right. Well, I think it's more like, you know what, like it's like, you know what, I put my neck out for you guys. And even last season, when you were saying ship on my back, like it pissed me off. And so like, you know, I was annoyed.

And then on top of everything else, you get a dog from my shelter, and from my adoption agency, and then you take it and then you return it You like you you it winds up in a shelter, which is like against everything I stand for You know, it's it's like what what sort of loyalty is there to me? Yeah, so Lisa's like um Cuz we're gonna Oh my god, so we cut back to the table and Rin is going oh

Teddy really sadger in this situation Rin is going, oh Teddy, I'm really sad you're in this situation. Why is this happening? The Teddy Melanchamp. Why? So over the top ridiculous. So Lisa's like, all right, Rin has got a bone. I'm going by guys. They're like, why Lisa?

Rinne goes, don't leave. It's not a bone. I'm going by guys. They look why Lisa Really goes don't leave it's not about you like yeah, it literally is She's like oh god and then Jarek goes oh She's like no, it's talking to me anyway and she's like I've spoken to you Lisa remember I said hello right before I said today. I believe everything you say So better I'm like I don't care so she starts leaving and then Kyle of course runs after it's like oh no Don't leave don't leave. We still want to humiliate you some more don't come on We have a few more things to throw in your face. Oh, no, don't need yeah and Vanderpump on a way out It's like thank you for being a good friend Denise. Thank you for being a good friend Camille and thank you for being a good friend bread basket.

All right, goodbye. Where is my army of baby flamingos to ferry me away? I'm Dury Gus. This reminds me of the Palahouse last year. I was like, yeah, where you were also a dick, okay? Yeah, exactly. Oh, God. So then D it's like, I don't want to be hastened this out. I would love to say, I believe you Lisa, but I'd need to be true to myself. Like okay. Yeah, this is the one you mentioned how you were chased all over the hotel by a dead or how about that? How about you return the dollar to the proper way?

How about that? How about be true to the contract that you signed? So then Teddy's like, I can't do this anymore. You understand? And Lisa Rinneke goes, I do understand. And I have great empathy for you because I have been in the same position. You are much house-ins. Here we go.

Rinne with her much house in bone. Rinne was totally programmed to say Munchausen and it was everybody else's fault. Even after Lisa Manardprom and Kyle sat down with Yolanda to squash this and Yolanda said, you accused me of Munchausen and they said, no, we were making fun of the fact that you look sick on Instagram

and then you're in a bikini on Instagram. Yeah. Here we go again, Renate. Drop the bone, Renate. Get a on Instagram. Yeah. Here we go again, Renna. Drop the bone, Renna. Get a better bone. Yeah. And so Teddy is like, I'm an honest person. Hi, I'm Teddy.

Never once have I told a lie, which I believe, but then later in the episode, it's like, hmm, what is happening here? Yes. So then Kyle's trying to get more out of her and Vanderpump's like, listen, something's gonna skew here and I need time to figure it out. I'm putting on my pink perhaps, my pink fur phone case and murder. She had somebody else right for her because she's so manipulative that she can't ride around all those. Then Denise goes, um, I don't mean to be an asshole, but I don't know what the fuck is going

on. So what are you saying? She set it up and she won't admit it. Is she the reason there's no French fries at this goddamn restaurant? I'm telling you, she's like, she won't admit it and I have proof. And Doreet's like, well well assume when you say you have proof So here's the proof two lines of one text the screenshot so the reason like oh So then Rino gets on to Kyle's case a little bit and she's like

You should pipe up and just say that Vanderpump doesn't always tell the truth. Say a Kyle, say a Kyle, which then puts Kyle in her favorite position is be like, uh, guys, this is a hard position to be in. I don't want to be in the middle. I even though I created this disaster, I don't like, I mean, I'm about, you do,

I'm about, I'm about, I'm about, I'm about, I'm about, I'm about. This is just, yeah do This is just who Lisa really is guys America's like oh you just gave her a pass babe a pass Pass Well, and then Kyle says guys. I'm not responsible for Lisa Vanderpump's actions I was like, huh, where have I heard that before? And it was like, roundly chastised by the entire group. Oh, that's right. Lisa Vanderpump saying that about John Blizzard and John Cessna. But for some reason, Kyle Richards can say, I'm not responsible for Lisa Vanderpump's actions, then it's okay. Well, they were employees. I think that's why they were saying that they're responsible.

She's responsible because I'm not her employee. And she's like, I'm just saying that what I know this about her and she's my friend and now what do I do? Like Kyle's a real victim here. Yeah, and then when it's like, yeah, that's right. What do you do? What the fuck do you do? That's why we need to talk about what you do and you say you know what you fucking do? you say stop it What do we say enough is is enough. Stop, stop. I'm like, okay, you know what, this is,

it's not like there's like a drug abuse on human trafficking happening here. It's like literally at the worst case scenario, Bander Promo is like, you know what? I'm mad. Let's like go, like go put this on camera because I don't feel like getting into a whole big thing but I wanna shame her a little bit.

Like yeah, maybe worst case scenario, not a classy moment, not even a moment of good character, but really not the end of the world. Oh, yeah. So Camille goes, I need to say something. Don't worry, it's not a bad Supreme Court justice. It is, it's nothing right now. I'll do this for you Camille. I'll do this for you Camille. Yeah, the people, like that Camille. I'll do this for you Camille. Yeah, there's the people like that Camille has wanted a power to scrub for years. It's like her ex-husband, big subender bomb for its venture car.

You guys get the stones on her side on the pathway, you know, in Malibu, Nick the tennis guy, where she goes, why do you ever say goodbye, you know what I'm saying? But sometimes it never happens. It never happens. Yeah, goodbye, you know what I'm saying? But sometimes the never happens. It never happens. Yeah, so she's like, I'm one of the topologies for my ex-husband. I wanted apologies from Kyle one time, even Lisa one time. But you just don't get him sometimes. And Camille's, she goes, but not everyone's nice.

And sometimes we need to find a way to move forward, because life is too short. And Camille and Teddy's like like who wants to live like that. There's a reason he's your ex-husband, okay? Yeah, meaning I guess like if you didn't want to hold credits, you just forgive him for everything, you know. So America's like, well she doesn't want to just sit here and pretend to be nice to somebody who's fucked her over. Yeah. And Denise is like, well why does she just say sorry like what's all this? She's gonna steal her fries and just walk off

Oh, Denise, you know what I got an idea why don't you go tell her that go knock on the door I got a thousand dollars with you babe on it if you do it alright, and I got it up me too And she's like I know thanks Something tells me not to fuck with Lee Savander Pump, and I don't really need a thousand dollars in case. Listen, listen, I'm a lady with terrible instincts, okay? I was married to Charlie Sheen, and now I'm fucking a guy who does quote unquote,

energy sound balancing something or another. He was married to Nick Litchard. I have terrible terrible judgment, but even I know don't get on the wrong side at least of Andropa. You're a man. You want married to Charlie Sheen. You're not afraid of Ainda Pup.

She's like, I am. She's worse than Charlie Sheen. Yeah. So, Erica's like, I'm okay. We had a fun day that I didn't mean to bomb it over Gaulson. I'm not going to Lisa Vandipov rule with it. And then Kyle's Rolex arrives. Yeah. Oh, God, you people are the worst. So meanwhile upstairs, since Lisa doesn't have a cigarette

this time, Allah Puerto Rico, she does the next best thing, which is get on the phone. She's like, again, can he say, goodbye, God.. Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop. I was like, oh, let me call the estate. Hello, Rosio. Rosio. Dogs barking in the background. Like, yeah, it's like a tornado going to it. It's like, ah, no, it's a Maria.

Oh, good, Alfredo. Glad to get you. Can you get Ken? Boop, boop, boop, boop. I was like, oh, fuck, gold sake. She can't even call Ken, so she's just stuck sitting there alone. So then it's 428 and we see Lisa Kyle getting in their van, because after we see her early. And Kyle's like, I'm so tired.

We had so much fun last night after you went upstairs crying. It was amazing. Kyle, this is a good friend, Kyle. Yeah, and Lisa's like, well, actually, I have many thoughts about that because it was so ridiculous and Kyle's like, the last thing I want to hear about right now is Lisa and this dog. I'm like, well, then you should have thought about that before you inscaded the entire situation two nights ago. Yeah, why don't you talk about your storylines some more. You're fucking Rolex Kyle, okay? Oh, you're sad your kids are moving out.

Oh. So, um, so Doreet is pretending to set the table in her unhotel room, which is hilarious. Yeah. Not me just put the finish in touches. One set in the table. Like a table. No.

And so everyone's coming over for a final breakfast. And they're just talking about the fun times last night. And Rinna's like, I don't know why I wrote this down. I just liked it because it was such a comical moment because Rinna's like, I woke up this morning and I didn't comical just because, sad, sad. They have nothing to fucking talk about. That's what also kills me about this group.

It's not like this is just a little side story, but they're all really interesting on their own. They have nothing to say to each other ever, unless it's about this. They try. It's like, we've been shopping. Oh, I've been shopping too. Did you go shopping? I went shopping.

And then they just kind of stare at each other like now, but. So Jereet's like, but so to read like the sad about oh miss sad yes sad yeah, so time yeah, so they all run us like it was fun but I woke up with a doom feeling

oh, that's why she was saying sad. I was trying to remember why Camila saying sad that's right So that's why she was saying sad. I was trying to remember why Camila saying sad. That's why I guess, that's a rid of Oak of Wood Doom. I forgot the Doom part. Yeah. So Doreet's like, a friendship is moving just me and Lisa, it's Pika and other friends in our money laundering chain. I hope we can work this time.

So I can rebuild my trust in Lisa. I'm like, oh, so now this is about you trusting Lisa. Okay. Yeah, exactly. So now we're back in Beverly Hills. And Lisa's like, oh, the roses are dead. Dead roses at Villa Blanca. I mean, Villa Rosa, how could we, we should name ourselves

Villa Rosa more to us. What, I don't know, I don't speak Spanish. Villa more to us. I have to forget. So she's like, oh, What I don't know I don't speak Spanish That's the dead really really clear the room with the dead roses humor So Ken comes out and he's like, Oh, you're still there? Oh, got more things. No, and the printer, I woke up to, bleep bleep bleep, it was the printer,

I mean, I'm afraid it was trying to get me. It's Maria. So Lisa's like, oh, Ken, you don't know what it was like. He's like, well, I can imagine. No, you actually can't. You cannot imagine. We were at a resort with no fish and baby flamingos. It was terrible.

He said, well, she can't bully you anymore darling. Because I went to the resort and I had him print out all of his tixes. I don't got tixes, print out. I don't refer to a science state darling. It took like 19,000 dreams of paper. BLEEP! Back to our... Back to our Kenton Come back, Kenton. Back around, Kenba.

So Ken starts reading the John Blizzard text, says, with Teddy, and he's like, So he says, you need to call me today. And she says, there's everything okay. And he says, whatever you're free, girl,

you're going to die, girl. OMFG, girl. So she says, have the dog that add dot dot dot and this is like Believerble okay, so you want to hear the Texas? Yes, which is like a I guess a new word of saying I guess it's not that new but it's you know the Bravo way of saying texts Yeah, Texas usually the standard pronunciation. Yeah, so we see something don't lie and then we see Teddy saying exactly in all caps. That's what Sessa told wait home line. Oh, no, no. This is John Blizzard saying exactly That's what Sessa told him told him told. Oh, I'm sorry everybody. That's what Sessa said to him last night

told him told oh I'm sorry everybody that's what SESA said to him last night LUDGIT she has half the dog there and I can say it looks like to read stock and he goes yeah because if they give us to go ahead dot dot dot dot Hanna and I have the receipts she goes other way it'll come out like we can lay it all out about everything this season on Fandre pump dogs LOL faced little little doggy face. I wonder who Hannah is. I'd like to know, I want to get to the bottom of that, okay? Yeah, it's also interesting because not only is Teddy a big fat fucking liar and totally conspired with this kid to bring out the dog on camera, which they ended up doing, which is what made this whole thing a problem, right?

That was Teddy's idea. No one put that in her head. She said, have the dog there, and I can say it looks like Dereet's dog, which is exactly what caused this whole thing. And then another interesting thing to me is that he said, because if they give us the go ahead, dot, dot, dot, we have the receipts. Well, this is all assuming, of course, that these texts are like legit and not doctored, which is annoying that we have to even say that, but this is the world we live in. So who knows? Because people have done shady things with fake text messages. I

mean, Jack's was able to do that. Jack's and Kristen were able to manufacture fake text messages. So this all hinges on that and I don't know. I mean, I still think it's all really dumb, but I don't know, because Teddy has been really forthright. She has been an honest person. Ma-a-a-a. This is true. Ma-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a on. Oh, you're saying besides this. No, like her track record has been pretty like clean and honest. And Lisa has been no pun intended dog by these accusations, but I've always stood up for Lisa because I've always felt like there were a lot of holes in the accusations.

And so there's a part of me that's like, well, at a certain point, how many of you can, can, can how many like when they're smoked, there's fire at a certain point. But at the same time, I kind of feel like when the kindling is Brandy Glanville and Lisa Rina You know what I mean? Are you on the foster? Well, I guess it's more a Kyle. Yeah So I mean, I don't know, but if this is true Teddy looks like a fucking idiot and it explains why Teddy so furious about everything and trying to come out in front of it, acting so self-righteous and mad. That's all true.

That's true. I'm interested to see what Lisa's gonna bring up this text. On folds. I wanna see the full text receipts. I wanna see everything now. Mm-hmm. Yeah, it would be pretty interesting because you can fake texts,

but they still stay in the eye cloud. I mean, I guess you would have to keep, they get a warripped. Oh my God, okay, I'm gonna stop by myself, Matt. I mean, I guess you would have to, they get a warrant. Oh my God, okay, I'm gonna stop myself now. I mean, you can delete individual texts from your text, from your intro, from your, it's not like a text conversation is definitely incriminating, but you can also delete things.

Right, I'm gonna be like, you can delete it on your, like if I delete my text on my phone, it's still on my computer the way it was. It doesn't delete on my computer. Does it, is it? Uh-huh, and if you delete it, you know So I'm sure iCloud has a record otherwise no one would ever get arrested from this shit, you know But I mean how are you gonna get that girl like now? I'm starting to think too crazy like get an FBI warrant I know I would like I would like Tim cook to release these texts from the Apple Vault.

And so we can just judge them and understand what the hell is going on. Because I just want context. I want context for everything. Because the other thing is, by the way, Devils Advocate, it's also possible that the whole conversation could have been set as one big joke.

Like there is a possibility that also the stuff also like the stuff that Kim presents it does is also taken out of context. So it's like, we need to see the whole interaction. I think what Daddy's mad at about is that she feels that she was tricked into being this excited about getting to read in trouble. Like by telling her, this guy, he's calling her and acting like, oh my god, we're gonna totally burn her down

and she got excited, but she was manipulated into it by Randall Prump. But nobody manipulated her into not liking Dree or saying bring the dog out. And then having the dog brought out. I mean, I think you, I think you, I think you, I think you hit the nail on the head. I think that like, it's all up in the being. I was manipulated. I was manipulated. She's upset that she was, she felt manipulated into saying the things that can

text it out. She's not saying she didn't say them. That's what she's truly mad about. That she felt like she was turned into like a craving, vengeful person. And you know, to that, I say fuck you. That's you who did that. Nobody made you do that. To give you information and then hope that you go spin it out of control is not a crime You know as long as you take it and spin it out of control. That's what I say I don't know well. I guess we'll just have to see what happens on the next episode because 20 episodes Jesus, I'm into it look look. It's like a conspiracy theory. That's that's like your brain butter. I know

But it's not because it's all plain as day everybody's just trying to make it this big huge thing like But isn't she wrong? Shouldn't she have fired them for trying to conspire to say something? No, fuck that Yeah I'm right. So we are done for the day Arguing about this fucking dog. I'm sure you guys will have plenty to say about it So please feel free to I'm sure I'll read every damn comment because as much as I pretend I'm over it I'm totally obsessed and we'll read about it until the next recap next week Yeah, we will see you guys later on. Thank you so much for being here

Compa south of my southwest people. It's Tuesday south of my southwest people. It's Tuesday, Bachelors are first, but then everyone with an RSVP is next and free. So get your butts over there and then we'll see you in Cincinnati next weekend for two shows. So come to the early show, guys, happy hour show. We will see you guys later. Thanks for everything. Bye everyone. Thank you. Hey, Prime members, you can listen to WaterCrapins Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or, you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey.