Watch What Crappens - RHOBH: Belle of the Ball Gag

Episode Date: March 8, 2018

Camille Grammer is the gift that keeps on giving, and this time she's assigned her wrath to Dorit, who is only now just feeling the harsh punishment of Lisa Vanderpump's bruised ego. It's a petty, brilliant episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, and we're recapping every inch of it. Grab your ball gags - we're gettin' freaky! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch what crapence would like to think it's premium sponsors!

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I'm Ben Mandelker from BsideBlog.com, the Bantle Blender podcast, and joining me today on Hump Day, aka Wednesday, is the wonderful and joyous Ronnie Caram from TrashTalkTV.com and the Rose Prick's Bachelor podcast, how are you, sir? Hello, Bann, I love Hump Day, I feel like it's a tribute to my day. I feel like it's a tribute to my posture. I feel like it's a tribute to whales. Think about it. Think about it. I just watched Blue Planet too, so it's just very top of mind. Oh my god, I just watched Homelands.

Totally the same thing. It's totally the same thing. Yeah, it's like when I see those stars. There was a lot of starfish stuff. I was thinking about Amy from Below Deck. Starfish. Starfish. Yeah, it's like when I see those star there was a there was a lot of starfish stuff I was thinking about Amy from below deck star face There's a lot of starfish action happening on blue planet to I think the coast episode It was like starfish is on the moves eating Clams really exciting stuff and also much like the real house was at Beverly Hills, which we'll be talking about today

But for the very news first, before we do that, tomorrow, Ronny and I are hopping on an aircraft and flying to Houston, Texas because on Friday, we have our big Houston show where we will be recapping the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Dinner Party from Hell, the epic iconic season one episode, many say it is the best episode of the real housewives of any franchise of all time. And we have chosen Houston to unpack that show. So I cannot believe we're going to get to do another recap with Kim Richards. I mean, it's been so long since we've talked about Kim Richards. It feels like it anyway.

Hello, Taylor Armstrong. We got Taylor Armstrong. We have Adrian Maloof. This is gonna be like, this is it. This is the moment we've been waiting for. I hope that I can find a Camille cocktail that I can enjoy on stage for this because it's gonna be epic. And, but we actually still have some tickets left.

The venue just sent out a red alert with siren emojis. They sent them out over the weekend that there was a low ticket alert. There's not a lot of tickets left. We highly recommend it. Yeah, we're almost sold out in Texas. Get your asses over there. Sell us out. Texas, come on. It's going to be fun. Yeah, sell it out. Watch our crappens.com. Go there and then you'll see the schedule there and then click the link to buy tickets for Texas. VIPs sold out, but there are still general admissions tickets there.

It's going to be amazing. I've never been to Houston and it's, which is, I don't know if it's going to make the show better, but for me, it's going to make the show better, but for me it's gonna make just show exciting I hope my show is always exciting and my whole family is gonna be there And so you know of course I'm gonna be dragging Ben to family lunches and events and you're just gonna love it, Ben Oh, yeah, I'm excited. I actually really am excited. I love your family There's so I love my family and my mom's bringing all of her, you know, friends who are just a barrel of laughs,

those ladies, they're all so hilarious. They are typical Texas, like rich ladies walking around with their gigantic gold earrings and their big crucifixis. And they're like, that was nice, honey. When we did our show in Austin, a long time ago, one of our first live shows, it was pretty much all of my mom's friends and then maybe like 20 Crappens listeners. And it was 100 something degrees and they had the best time and that was a three hour show we did. That day, you remember?

Oh, how can I forget? It was like the sun was just like, focus on what we were drenched in sweat. The audio, we had, weird things happening with the audio. It was pure madness, but that's, you know, it's hopefully we can recreate that And also by the way we have to give a shout out to Christine Web one of our listeners She is the one who actually a few months ago

Before we had the beautiful Amanda taking on as our as our tour booker We didn't know how to get in touch with any sort of place. And Christine contacted us and was like, Hey, my friend, my friend is like the manager at warehouse live where this is taking place. You should get in contact with him. We got in contact with him. And while we have this show, so you know, a great example of a listener really helping us out. We really appreciate that a lot. Christine and we are excited to see you at the show. Love you, Christine. Yeah. What we are going to have so much fun. So until then, let's get on to Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Oh my God. This episode had me just like overwhelmed with joy and excitement. It was like such a wonderful masterclass and passive aggression and to

see Camille get back in touch with her season one persona was just so utterly fabulous. Yes, and it's so Camille. The whole thing. We've missed you. We've missed hating you. I didn't hate you in this episode, but girl, I hope you come back and keep it up. Yeah, because she's been playing nice for several, several years. And finally, she had decided no more, no more. And she went back to one of her trademark tactics, which we'll get to at that part of the show.

Speaking of Camille, the episode opens up on Camille. This second week in a row, yeah. Yeah. Wow. Second week in a row. So Rinna is going to meet Camille at a lingerie store and a lingerie. And she really likes Camille so she's changed this up her. Hello, hi, hi. And she gives her her classic. Hello. Hi, hi. Hi, hi. Hi, hi. Hi, hi, how are you? How are you? Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi!

How are you? Hi! Hi! So you've got Rinna's, you've got Rinna's. Hi! How are you? Makes me with, umuuh! Umuuh!

Hi! Hi! Umuuh! Hi! Hi! Umuuh! Hi! Umuuh!

Hi! Umuuh! So, for me, meal is like, I don't feel that secure about my body, so I'm insecure about trying things on. I'm like, well, that's good. You're at a lingerie store, Camille. Great setup. Yeah. She's talking about, you know, about what she went through, you know, her battle with cancer, she had a very intense hysterectomy and she starts saying, she starts talking about it, she's saying like,

yeah, they have to remove her top part of my cervix and top out of my fichija, I know it's cancer, it's like a hard thing to go through. And the background, the music is like, I was like, oh, this doesn't feel appropriate. Because it's a Beverly Hills clown cancer music. You know, it's like the bone cancer. Tum exactly. I put Hagrid on a on a golf cart And she chased her one way and then D was on a skateboard coming out in the other direction And I was just speedwalking with ankle weights until we got him

Now thank God for Rina finding the silver lining and in all this cancer stuff because you know for Rina finding the silver lining and all this cancer stuff because you know again Camille is like yeah cancer and Rina is like but you look amazing Thanks Yeah, Rina is one of those people like cancer is the best diet baby She's like yeah, but you know on the positive note you look amazing baby As you know, well, you know they have to cut up the top of my, you know, we don't understand the magic. Yeah, we don't know.

Yeah, we don't know. I think, yeah. For all she's thought she could be talking about a bumblebee. Like, you know, I had to give a bumblebee a haircut. I'm like, I don't know what you're talking about. So. But she ends it by going, I have the vagina of a 16 year old now. And Brenna stops, like, because her face has been making those,

whoa, whoa, whoa, she's been making these faces. And she stops and she goes, wait, isn't that a horse. Don't write a horse. I Yeah, I was like I think I don't again I don't know much about vaginas, but I thought people aspire to have young Rejuvenated vaginas so it seems like there wasn't upside and it is funny what you were saying how you didn't know really what any of this is like Could be like Camille talking about a bumblebee Because Camille even says can you imagine telling a guy you went through this? And when he's like, what kind of you really know?

I'm like, no, I don't think so. Yeah, I was like, no, we don't know. We have no idea. I mean, of course we're gay guys. Yeah. Yeah, we don't, we obviously like, I always imagine vagina looks like the eye of Sauron, you know? That's my question. I imagine it being, I'm saw on, you know. That's my.

I imagine it being. I'm not. I'm not going to say anything else. I just imagine it being a vagina. I imagine that it'll look at me just to be like no, sir. I feel like it looks like the computer display a minority report. Like you just like wave your hand and you get. You see something new every time.

It's like, wow, look at that vagina. Well, like obviously I've seen a vagina, but I've seen it like I've seen, you know, an engine when I go to a jiffy loop, you know, and they open my hood. Of course, I've seen it, but I don't know what to do with it. And I certainly don't want to get a dipstick and start poking around in there, you know, that's the last thing any car needs. Yeah, it's like I've seen it, but I don't really look at it. I'm like, oh, there it is. I'm going to

look at something else now. I've seen mountains, but I don't climb them. Okay. I've actually, okay, this is, this is maybe an overshare and it's tinged with tragedy. I've actually only seen one vagina in real life, like it, like not like from a picture obviously. And it was China, the rest there's vagina. I was at an event and she was there and she was wearing a dress and there was China, the rest there's vagina. I was at an event and she was there and she was wearing a dress and there was like a very strong gust of wind and her dress literally blew up and she was not wearing underwear

and it was like China's vagina. China's vagina girl. That was my one and only time seeing a vagina in real life. And I feel like that's not the way it should be. But you know what, rest and peace, China, rest and peace. That was my one and only time seeing a vagina in real life. And I feel like that's not the way it should be. But you know what, recipes, China, recipes. I wish I was close enough to hug you right now. Tell you it's all gonna be okay. I'm hugging myself.

I'm actually hugging my knees and cradle. I'm cradling myself and rocking back and forth. Rocking back. Oh my gosh. So, Rinna's like, well, I understand what it's like to lose your mojo. I gave birth to the other one. It's so bad that of course it's Delilah Bell that gave her her depression. Why is it always the other one in these families? You know, Delilah Bell is the first one. Oh no,, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I did, I proposed part of depression. I did, I proposed part of depression. I thought it was a cruise line. So now they're like showing off their lingerie, and Rina's like, wow, wow, you're getting that. Oh my god, this body gorgeous.

Wow, hi, hello, hello, it's gonna open up like a flower. I don't know if anybody's ever seen Rina on QVC, but she does exactly what she does on QVC, like some chunky woman's walking past and one of her dusters, she goes, are you kidding me? Or are you kidding me, Camille? Camille, are you kidding me right now?

Are you kidding me right now, Camille? Ha ha ha ha not. I'm not. Did anyone see Camilla? Is she kidding me? Oh, she's kidding me. How dare she steal Ramona's line? Well, she's been saying, are you kidding me on QVC for years? It's hilarious. Because she, you know, they just make you talk forever. They're like, keep talking. She's like, wow, wow, are you kidding me in that dust? Her from on the sinker? Are you getting me? And duster from on a singer are you getting me? And then Rina came down with a plague and we didn't see the rest of the episode

Yeah, then really died she made a good dick joke and then she died she's like I know a widow a man's heart And you some time, all baby Where's my where's my? I'm coming down the flute It's like a five minute clip of Rene just laughing at herself. She's like at the far just at the pharmacy. Hey, baby I feel like shit I feel like I'm gonna be a throw up right now on you CVS person. I think it's a fluke. I guess it's a laughing. Zycam, are you kidding me right now, Zycam? Are you kidding me, Zycam? Oh, no, baby.

So next we go to a classic Real Housewives restaurant. They can be found apparently in any Real Housewives town. And that is the Fig and the Oliv. With the Fig and the Oliv. Oh, is that where they were? I was looking down. I was too lazy to rewind and see where they were. The Fig and the Oliv.

Yes. I was looking down too, because they weren't Fig and Oliv. see where they were at the figure in the olive Yes, I was looking down to because they were at Figginolive and I was like oh god. What are you Vicki? One of the one of the things that I At most disappointed at the most in the Obama White House is that he he went to an event at Figginolive here in LA And ever since then it's like Figginol of which hosted Barack Obama. I'm like no no That does not make you a better restaurant. Yeah, it doesn't. However, Figgin' all of Sput's delicious. Both delicious.

Yes. So Kyle arrives here first and she's in her, you know, Diff, I wear sunglasses. And she's like, I don't know. She's just reflecting her sunglasses. I was like, shut up private room at Figgin' all of Kyle. I don't know. Kyle's going on my nerves. Okay.

So then Eric comes to be fair. Private outside space. We don't think they're being fair. Private. So then Erica comes to him. Oh, hello, man. Have a fun. Oh, yeah, I'm so proud of all that. I think I'm going to Hollywood.

I'm going to pull that. That's a really big deal. I looked on the back to see if it was published by Simon and it wasn't, you know, so it's that's a really big deal. I looked on the back to see if it was published by Simon and a Soustache and it wasn't. You know, so it's not that big of a deal. It was so good for you. Your name was in print, wow. Wow.

Yeah, Pamela and Kyle sold yet another show. And I'm like, what are these shows about? Is this one about a family struggle to live with a crescent-shaped pool in the backyard? I mean, like, what is happening? And I'm also so jealous. How is Kyle Rich was selling some of these shows? I want to sell a script.

Well, Kyle is selling, she sold a show called Glass Houses and it's picked up by ABC. So congrats. Because that's amazing. It is. But also I just love the idea of Kyle writing a show called Glass Houses. Because you know that that's Kyle sitting in a glass house

throwing bricks at the walls. Or these batting down the ones that Kim's throwing. Yes, exactly. It's a bulletproof glass. And Kim is just on the outside running headfirst into it trying to get in. It's probably just Kim and Kyle just fanning themselves in the heat of the screen house situation. And Kyle just like simpering in the corner, being like, well, I wanted to get an air conditioner,

but Kim wouldn't let me have one. I don't know why Kim's mad at me. I mean, the main character is named Finn Fitchards. And she's the drunk who runs away from police and hides and bats and stuff. Like, I'm mad to watch who's mad. We have this ongoing gag every episode. You know how like Murph and Brenno is against a new secretary. This one we always get a new window because we all have a scene where Kim walks through the glass. Oh, you guys made a person take on their calf. So, the question is, how is Tom? He's in, he's in person, I mean, physical therapy.

And I was like, so I'm, I'm taking physical therapy at the moment for like a knee issue that I'm having. So I'm like, I am basically Tom Derrari in this situation. I aspire to be Kyle Richards selling TV shows, but no, I'm just like an old man in physical therapy getting my knee moved back and forth. This is my life Well, hey, Tom did really well for himself. So there's that. Oh, that's good. That's good At least you're rich And Eric is Eric is like oh he's good. He's given a speech at the log Beach bar Is that a big bar or what?

No, the bar association call, even out of that one. Come on, come on. Yeah, Kyle, you got to pull up. You've sold, you've sold, they've sold like five different shows. You have to start learning what the bar actually means. You're dealing with lawyers. Yeah, I hope glass houses isn't about lawyers. Oh yeah.

By the way, I would like to thank the good fight for coming back into my life. Love you, Christine Brans. Yeah. Okay, let's carry on. They both order, guess what, Ben? They do this. Brans, you know, Brans, you know,

I'll think of Brans, you know. Captain Sandy must have been at the next table and said, hey, get those two fine ladies some Brans, you know, and give them a pillow afterward. It looks like they may need a nap. Girls, like, I'm going to write a script about this brand Zeno. They sell it to NBC. What would a brand Zeno show be called?

Bones. Oh, they already made that. Sorry. Well, I guess I'm not going to be a TV producer. I'm just a captain captain. Sandy. This is brand Zeno. It makes you cry every single week.

Brandzino with us. We find out that the Brandzino that we've been following all along is really the mother Brandzino to some little Brandzino's. This one's a really big Brandzino that like learns to love itself and feel sexy. And then like a really hot brand Zeno who has issues.

And then when it just gets roasted alive. They have like, wait a minute. And then there's like a tuna fish. And they're like, what's that yellow fin tuna doing? You're like, oh, that tune is adopted by the brand Zeno. You're not part of this school. Like, oh, you don't even go here too, man. OK, so Eric is like, didn't look at it.

I think I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been, I've been. I'm not allowed to do that. I'm not used to Eric having said I'm gonna be lying. I'm gonna leave him in a bottle. She just started scouting. I'm gonna leave him in a bottle. I'm gonna leave him in a bottle. I'm gonna leave him in a bottle. It's a bottle.

It's a pussy. A pussy. Like okay It's a battle. It's a battle. Oh, a battle. Like, okay, you're okay. Stop touching yourself to a fat stomino song. Oh, no. Little Richard. I'm a little bit blizzabla, little bit blizzabla, little bit blizzabla. But, bye bye.

Bye bye. I got nobody. That's a lie. I got tons of audio. And some just, you know them, Kyle? I got you right here I'm just I'm just a like a Jane and everything I sing is about being expensive I

Love that later at the end of the episode they're like coming up on Beverly Hills this season she's like this is expensive I'm like yes Erica We know where it's expensive to eat at Ficken all of you better their cow you'd be the come on yourself to rat some jokes like class houses so they talk about the LVB LVB V-Sovander bump they talk about the it is a valent bump it oh she should sell sell those since she seems always have one in a back bump it I want a crown of the head bump it So she's they're talking about LVP and Crowds like yes, but then to read but you know what I just decided I just want everybody to get along

It's between them. I'm like you started this Kyle. No Kyle did not start it. Kyle did not start it Kyle did not start it no she did how well the reed started it and then the other girl spread it but Kyle was just again exactly what he brought it up at dinner and made it a huge fight and refused to let anybody just get over it and then yelled and cried at Lisa because she wasn't mad enough about it this is all to reach it's all to reach and you fell for Dorita's Doritisms because you're blaming it on Kyle. Boop-a-meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee birthday to you. I love this class at the end. PK, that's such a PK clap. It's like I'm too tired to completely clap. Let's be about birthdays.

They're talking about like, what are they going to get for Lisa's birthday? And they're going to have a birthday party. And they're like not sure. So they start joking about how they're going to get her a flamingo, a big pink bird. And you know that if they were there and do we heard it, do we would have actually procured a flamingo for the Savannah bump. But it would have

been like a penguin because she's stupid. She'd be like, this is what the toad made of it at least. And of course Kyle is such a dumb dumb. I mean not a dumb dumb dumb best to read. Sorry, you're gonna be confused today very easily. So Kyle's like, you know, this is Beverly Hills, so it has to be good. Like, that's Kyle's way to say any live. This is Beverly Hills. So, you know, presidents are different here. They have to be really good in Beverly Hills. Um, have you seen the shit that people wear in Beverly Hills?

Just walk down Beverly Boulevard, Beverly Drive, rodeo drive, Camden, wherever you want. There's just nothing but tacky ass people in Beverly Hills. I'm sorry, I said it. Yeah, get somebody a leather banny pack and shut up Kyle. It's not like everybody else in the world just gets each other shitty gifts.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, wait a second, Ronnie. I am now taking on Bridget what Kyle said. Thank you for a limited, thank you. She shamed our gifts to each other. And I feel like I can be a really good gift giver wouldn't give in the opportunity. Well, it's been six years. I know. I was like, I'm going to do you need.

I'm like, I don't think I've given you any gifts. I'm giving you any gift to give to friendship. That's what poor people do and that's the saddest part of this is that Kyle's correct. You know what's funny? Actually, it is about getting you a gift today. You did. But I don't do it because then I'll have to do it. And then it's going to be a lot. I'm not going to.

I saw so. And also, God, I'm so sorry because we're talking. It's like seen too. But I also have to make an announcement about KitchenAids because I told you the wrong thing last week when we were talking about your new KitchenAid. My first KitchenAid was a pullup, one of the lift-up things, and it did have the little triangle lock things.

My one I have now is a tilt head, and it does not have the little triangle lock things. That's what I thought. And I was like, people probably went online and searched for the thing I'm talking about and couldn't find it. And it's because I lied to you on accident. Sorry, darling. I figured it out when I tried to make cookies yesterday. I made lemon bars.

I gave my new kichinata. I gave it a whirl. I made some iron-grown lemon bars yesterday for the last six. How did it work out? So fun. I was like, oh, I'll just put that butter and sugar and here end just walk away while I get other things ready. I'm just going to call these the shape of lemon bars,

so I feel like a winner. A little butter monster crawled out and it was like the lemon bars are trying to fuck up ranzino somewhere what are you doing? the shape of lemon bars? the shape of lemon hello this is Lisa Vanderpum we are are taking a commercial break now, but if you don't, you won't worry. You're very lucky. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life.

But come on, someday, parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares of our freshly honest and insightful take on parenting. Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brown-Oller, we will be your resident not-so-expert-expert. Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding, and thinking. Oh yeah, I have absolutely been there. We'll talk about what went right and wrong.

What would we do differently? And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone. So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. All right.

So speaking of artificial intelligence, we now go to Doreet who is, she'll just see her and she's like looking at binders and she just seems totally confused. She's just like, I don't understand. These looked like books, but they have loose pages in them PK PK Now were these were these pieces of papers

PUNCHED with the whole punch Listen to me papers PK, Bubba, baby Branzino Rocks Bitnami Rocks Bit nomin Yeah, she she stomps downstairs where pk is just in full wallrests recline mode and I don't know if you know this is But in the background there was a swan of but an inflatable swan sort of drifting in their pool

I was like they really are doing whatever they can to get into Lisa's good graces just copying everything she does Yes, I wish that p PK could just be inflatable. He could just be inflatable sitting there. You press the button and he's like, hello, Bob. He's sort of is. He sort of looks like the co-pilot and the inflatable co-pilot and airplane. But he's and he's an inflate weight. He's unable to de-inflate.

De-flate. Oh, de-flate. De-inflatelate that was in the it's a great scene you're gonna forgive me haha to call it when you dee and inflate something haha haha boy

boy George what do you call it so yeah so um she comes downstairs and uh... pk went he's like I went to the factory I was like did you say fat or a factory or a factory? what? till the factory? well that explains a lot and she's like

whew you know I was out of town PK blah blah he's like yes I know darling well that came home to a host of emails a host so many emails, I had to look at the window, I saw a murder of crows, a murder of crows. To get a PK, I know what words, scribes, groups of things. He's like, well, you told me to get involved, so I went down to the factory and I met the whole team. And you have this whole coach online and you know It's very expensive and I think it should be available to every woman. It's like you guys come on now. Yeah, and her it's like And she what does that mean she literally goes oh

ha I was like good wonder you really you really got like that you really captured the essence of saying oh hell no Those singers who sing with their speech say Hello, no, it's very street-dory, okay He's saying no, no, no, no, no, and I say yes, yes, oh wait, did I get that right? PK? He says maybe, maybe, maybe, maybe, maybe. And if I say stop slashing my swimwear lad in half, PK.

Yeah, so an MPK is like, another thing, babe. I don't like the name Nava for swimwear. That's called Beverly Beach. And at this point, I thought he had just gone down just to oversee some things, and then it's becoming clear that he's actually made some changes, and he's describing Beverly Beach. He's like, it's an imaginary beach girl.

It's where you get a candle at dinner, you know? I'm like, to me, Beverly Beach sounds like, it sounds like a sitcom from 1987 starring Angeline and Richard Mulligan. Beverly Beach. I like this imaginary romantic place. She's like, you know, think about it. It's imaginary.

You can have a glass of wine. You could have beans and rice and it's called Moroccan food. You know how it goes. And she's like, to be a kid, a swimsuit is a way to hold his boobs in place. To me, it's an art. It's a soul.

Like bikinis are your soul to eat, really. Come on. Explains a lot. You really do. You're definitely beach. Definitely beach. I mean, it actually sounds like a lot. You're really both. You're definitely beach. I mean, it actually sounds like a lady. It sounds like there's like the woman who was at the front desk at my high school. If you're late and you had to be like, I'm late, they should be like, okay, well, go see Beverly Beach and get your attendance cleared up, you know? And it sounds like the

most fun name for like someone who works at a school, but then she's awful. And really mean. She's awful and really bureaucratic. And she's like, well, you're late. I know, but the bus had a flat tire, well, that's okay. You still have nine more absences before you start getting at something another. I've ever lead the Anselo's all mad because she was trying to be Beverly Beach, but it was already taken.

Maybe Beverly, I feel like actually now, Beverly Beach is played by Edie McClurge. It was like a pilot that didn't go to series. Beverly Beach starting Edie McClurge. She's a school administrator who doesn't take any EBS, even though her kids go to the same school. To-to. Edie McClurge.

She's just popping up over the fence. She's a mom at home, but an administrator at school. Definitely. So she's like, hit her in my whole business upside down. My wealth tops on the bottom of the bottoms on the top that would actually make these like, interestingly, at least, you know, and she's like, that's like me going and changing boy, judges and tired to schedule. It's it seems, it does seem presumptuous that he would go in and just make these changes and not even confirm with her. Unless she's just lying that I think she just didn't want to take ownership of these

changes. Like this way she can still claim that she's couture, but then PK takes the brunt of lowering the quality of her swim line. Well, it's called Beverly Beach Duret. And she has swimsuits named after the housewives, called Lisa. Gao. Ericko.

The Teddy is probably just like a board short. It's just like a cover up or something. It's one of those, yeah, towel cover ups. It's one of those stripes. It's one of those, yeah, towel cover ups. It's one of those stripe one pieces from 1922. But it's for the best arms, like only the arms matter. Yeah. So they start talking about LVP and she's like, I'd never want to hurt a feelings.

And Pete is like, well, we need to make sure it's cool. I want to allow this to kick off at least as a birthday party. So we need to make sure it's cool. I won't allow this to kick off at least his birthday party. So we need to make sure it's cool before then. I'm like, yeah, right. Okay, it's going to kick off at least his party. And it's going to be a kick to both of your faces by Lisa over and over again, and over and over. Because her name is Lisa Vanderpump and that's how she

wrote, we'll do. And of course, by the way, to read tells PK, a totally exaggerated version of what happened and sort of tangled up. Again, she's once again making herself sound like she just have to mention like, well, you know, Lisa, you know, she's like a little needy here and there, but you know, actually, she was so demure and that Kyle blew it up out of proportion. When I was like, no, you were sitting at that table and you were talking massive shit about Lisa Vanderbump, just as you did it. Polly House. So I just, it makes my blood boil watching, watching to read, live in her own reality. And yet I don't even know what she's

talking about the way to say, do you want more water? I said Lisa needs some. And suddenly I've said Lisa's need him. I don't understand. So now we go back to, now we go to Camille's house, I don't understand. So now we go back to Camille's house where she's doing some sort of event. It's like a cancer foundation thing. It's like selling fragrance and to raise money for cancer foundations, et cetera. You know good stuff. There's no reason for cancer to not smell delicious. Wow.

This is amazing, everyone. Wow. She's like, we need better towels in here. What are these towels? My guests are going to notice that. Wow, this is amazing, everyone. Wow, wow, wow. She's like, we need better towels in here. What are these towels? My guests are gonna notice that. My guests will notice. What are these towels?

I'm like, okay, you're kind of like reenacting your entire marriage, like writing that bathroom. Cause you know, it was like that every day with Camille. Fraysha just wants it shitty towels at all times. He's like, just go down to this corner and get a towel from the little mermaid guy. Okay. On your lawn does property. But doesn't your lawn to get a percentage of that now?

So then the assistant makes a joke. She's like, okay, we'll get new towels because it's always a party in the bathroom. And I was like, well, with this crew, to read it will be. I was like, well, with this crew, to read it will be. So Teddy and Kyle and Erica are driving together. And Erica, Teddy's like, oh, hi, I'm Teddy. I hate driving. It's my, it's my Achilles heel. And Kyle's like, oh, really? That's funny because I thought of American woman while I was driving to Palm Springs.

Just driving back and forth. I just realized that this is the show that I want to do. I'm like, okay, so this show's gonna be all about like Getting gas going to the bathroom Going going to subway is that what the show's gonna be about asking for taste or cups of the different slurpee flavors To be getting stuck in trash just be like an episode of Alisa Silverstone getting in traffic on the 10 So Alisa calls and she's, hello, it's me Lisa. And I bump. Are you on your way?

I'm on my way to you. We're look at us friends forever. And cows like, are you with to read? And she's like, I'm on my own. I haven't spoken with her. Where's Rina? And everyone's like, she's dead. She's dying.

And then we get a clip of Rina who even if she's on her deathbed will still do a space selfie So it looks good and have on really my sunglasses and be like hi. How are you? I'm sick. Are you kidding me? Don't hustle a... Vomiter, baby. Um, you know that I was just like, you know that Lisa van der I don't need attention. I can drive places on my own. I just like a normal person good Oh Time down the only road you've known Little Richie wrote that song for me. It's like no, we didn't Lisa. Oh, well. All right. Good. I click it was Tom Cochrane Is that one of Rosia's friends?

Thomas Cochrane Is that one of Rosio's friends, Thomas Conneron? So the other one she's like, what are you wearing, Lee Sin? She's like, I have a chunky cool thing going on. And girls like chunky cork. I can't be friends with you anymore. Goodbye. I missed that entirely, chunky cork. Well, Kyle's so confusing to me because it's like, I hate her.

And then I like her again. And then I hate her and then I like her again. And then I suddenly start searching agency listings and I'm like, wait, why am I on this site? Well, you know, I don't know if you heard, but the agency just opened up an office in Scottsdale, Arizona. Ah, this damn show getting into my head. Oh, so Camille, I just wrote down Camille Hello Montage.

I think we just saw her greeting people, just like left a right there. Hi. Hello. It's like all the bombers coming in. Wow. What's happening during this part? So of course Kyle opens it up with obviously in Beverly Hills you want to look beautiful and obviously you got a swell beautiful because it's Beverly Hills like yes everyone stinks everywhere

but Beverly Hills Kyle. Also if you go into any store in Beverly Hills. Like, yes, everyone stinks everywhere, but Beverly Hills, Kyle. Also, if you go into any store in Beverly Hills, you just smell Jack Rennwar, okay. This is a illusion of Beverly Hills smelling good is wrong. It's just like intense, intense cologne. Yes. And let's see, Camille's like, this is the cancer scent. So she has one scent that's like for the raising money for cancer. And they're really pretty.

They're like, julled things. Yeah. And Lisa comes in and she's like, love these they're so caught yay it's so Erica Erica have you seen these fancy things they're expensive the dollar sign dollar sign me look at me suggesting something to one of my very very good friends oh there's you to eat with by the way was that for silver barns, talking to fragrances, it looked exactly like her. Um, for silver barns from three companies? Yes.

Or three's a crowd or whatever? Three's coming. Oh my god, please say it was her, Terry. No, I don't think it was her, but I was like, this is the sliding doors reality for for silver barns. She would have been more upset about it. She would have been like, well, this one's really for smelling barns. She would have been more upset about it. She would have been like, Well, this one's really for smelling good, Jack.

Okay. Go along, bro. Good morning. I'm just like in a, I'm just in a retro sitcom place. I think I've made about 20 different illusions to sitcoms this episode. I know. For silver barns and eating McClure girl

like having one chapter this show. Where the perfumes are yours and yours and his three perfumes into I like Spritz company too. That's funny. So the syllabars and Kim Richards back in the day probably did a bunch of like, they're probably to this day they're probably doing those like conventions you know signing autographs for. Oh I thought you were gonna say Coke and Coke and you're not. You're gonna say they did a lot of coke together, which I could see. That would have been amazing.

Why not? You know? You're at some level. I bought last time, Kim. Nah, you're sharing. Kim, I'm pretty sure I spent my last three paychecks when I cooked for us. Ma-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a- What's your cast gotten at yours? Just add Sally. What's her face your favorite from mash? Colorman It's like Lou Ann. This is basically like Lou Ann for the grip. I would totally watch

Anything that involves Sally, Colorman, Priscilla Barnes and Kim Richards. I Would like Kyle can sell that show and I'll be happy. Yeah, my please suggest you call it last house is Kyle. You need casting suggestions. Yeah, so to read so to read. So to read is a friend of me nice to Vanderpump and Vanderpump is doing just what you said. She's like, oh look up Chris. I am with Eric. Jane Gerratti.

Yeah, and to read and to read. It's like I'm going to win back Lisa Vanderepump and I'm going to inject her with so much Doreet love that she's going to explode. It's going to sound just like this. And ladies! Welcome aboard to Choo! So Doreet's injection of love is basically talking like this. Hello, Lisha. Hello, Lisha, I'm pizza, boo boo. Lisha, boo, boo, boo. Lisha, boo, boo, boo.

I'm a puppy, puppy, puppy. Duffy. And I actually recorded that because anytime Doreet makes just strange noises that recorded it, so this is actually how it sounds. Lisha, my love, Duffy, Duffy, Duffy. What's wrong with you? Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,

oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,

oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,

oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, all that stuff as predicted and as Kyle predicted, as everyone could see what's gonna happen. And I don't think Dereet really realized what she was messing with in New York because now it is on. Well, of course Kyle predicted it. Kyle was like Kyle's the one who's doing fracking. And then she's like, oh my God, it's an earthquake. Told you, it's like, well, you're the one fracking Kyle.

No, it was Dereet. I get madly, I get madly. Dereet was the fracker. Dereet was the fracker. Doree was the fracker. Doree was the fracker. Kyle was just like, you know, in a shed lounge, there's sunglasses on and like

falling into the frack, you know, sorry. Should they do it? Doree fracked next to Kyle's pool and Kyle's like Lisa, but, um, you know, where the people, there, there have been a lot of people who have gone

through the Lisa van der Pum treatment. Kyle, of course, where are the people? There have been a lot of people who've gone through the Lisa Vanderpump treatment. Kyle, of course, went for years. Brandy Glanville got it. She couldn't take it. It's sort of causally the show. Yeah, Brandy, yeah. But Brandy, of course.

Lisa Vanderpump, like a downward spiral that she just never recovered from. Lisa Rinna is the one who's actually been able to take it the best, because she just laughs and gives it back, you know, which is what Lisa's about. Lisa just pretends that she's everything's okay. And then she starts attacking you behind her back.

Yeah, she's just waiting to pound. She's been a little Lisa and has been a little absent from the season, I feel like. I'm waiting for her to just like jump right back into the fray and start shit. I feel like she's just, I feel like she's, that's what she do. Yeah, I feel like this season, she's just like,

I need a breath. I'm just gonna hang on the side baby, you know, and then I feel like she's gonna just have a monster. She just seems like she's totally fine and just giggling and working and hustling and doing her thing. And then suddenly it's like, where are people doing co-kin your bathroom, Dorit? Yeah, yeah, she'll get back in the mix soon, I'm sure. So in the meantime, Lisa van Opel was laying it on thick and you know, Pins DeRite's just hugging her and kissing her and all that stuff. And Lisa Vanderpump is like, a good friend doesn't talk trash about you. DeRite! I need space and time to make it work again. Okay, Lisa. Is this someone you've

just broken up with? It's like, come on Lisa, but I'm loving it because this is when I love Vanderpump when she just comes out with her petty old lady shit And she's like, no really, I'm 50 years old. She's so good at it. She's so good at the at the petty past progression that you just can't help but just just sit back and let it wash over you Just just enjoy the show. So Erica is talking to Vanderbump, so, what do you got to do for your birthday, Miss 40-year-old? And Lisa's like, I'm going to ride my horse and spend time with my husband, can you my divert event?

And Erica's like, oh, and then get ready for a Saturday, so we can come and ruin your life, wow! Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh I just True I'm just going to ride the horse. I mean I can't ride as well as Teddy But I'll do my best my teddy bear I'm gonna go go down to Delmarin hop on the horse next to my hotel room. It's so lovely Doreet is at the bar now with Erica, and she's like, when I was pregnant, I stopped drinking. And you know, you see the world so differently. And I was talking to myself.

Do I talk a lot of shit when I drink? And Erica's like, oh yeah, do we? Yeah. Erica, I see the words so differently. For instance, now that when I've been sober, I had no idea that the road going up to our house wasn't too lained only. I thought it was like four or five good at a good day. Well, you're talking a lot of shit with your drunken derit. So, here's a whole box of friends in here, self you know, but. Erica was really funny in this episode. She was really funny.

She was just having a good time and just letting down her guard a little bit, and then totally making fun of being on housewise, which is hilarious. Yeah, well, Kelly's a really live in Japan. Yeah, and they're all standing around, and Erica asks to read and lease up their resolve their issues and Dereet's like, well, of course we are. At least in have family. I'm like you've only been friends for 18 months and she said last episode that she only likes you as a

Favorite a pk so I don't know what sort of family that is but Yeah, I'm not a very positive one. Yeah, exactly. I almost like at a restaurant when they're like okay everybody We're family. Oh, and you best boy you're fired. He's's like, okay, everyone's like, buy your not our brother anymore. Yeah, thanks. Thanks, Applebee's to read. I best say to read as the time that would take the Applebee slogan a little too literally. Well, I've been told that I'm family at Applebee's so I think I can get a discount or at least a free app when we go. You think they're gonna get me a Christmas present? PK, I didn't see a present from Appleobies. They did say that we're family. Well fix it. Fix it before we go back there. Fix it with Apobies.

I was thinking that Apobies should rebrand, called themselves Berger Beach. What do you think? I'm a sad myself, P.K. Berger Beach to read. All right, book it. So then to read now says that she's telling the group, she's like, well, I had a nice talk with Lisa van de Pomp in the park, and then then she came back to me the next day and she's mad. So clearly she got some twisted information.

So if someone wants to say the good about it, that they can say it right now. I'm like, she got like very, very accurate information from Teddy. I will say that Teddy does not embellish. She is usually like right on the mark. And on top of that, Erica backed her up. So, yeah.

Teddy's like, I recorded it into the language of Morse code in my Apple Watch. Would you like to hear it? I'm Teddy. I will say, I mean, Doreet is trying her best to deflect this all into Teddy. She's now made it less about her and Kyle and try to make Teddy the root of all the problem.

That Teddy was the awesome. Teddy unsaid something. If Teddy hadn't, you know, Manu fashion all this drama and been so hyperbolic that there wouldn't be all this problem. Yes, and to read it's like, Where's Peelefee to charm and now Teddy dole bell? And Teddy's like, um, I didn't say it. Okay. Like, oh, look, all I said was that if you did it to me, it would hurt my feeling.

What would I do to hurt you? did it to me it would hurt my feeling Look I'm not gonna go round and round I want to go round and round I hate squares Are you just trying to confuse her? I'm just like imagining to read on like swings at the carnival I just I just love ride. Just going in one big straight line. Two minutes. I also like to have just to re-walking in a circle. Just the corner of the room, just going in circles. Just wearing walking in circles. Yeah, this is Doreet. That's how she was at the store opening last week. She's like, oh, I'm drinking over here. Now I'm making a circle in the middle of the room But don't know why I can't stop So now to resource talking to Erica off to the side and complaining about Teddy and she was saying Teddy made it so much worse than it lies

I mean, I'm I don't know what she's talking about and I was surprised that Erica wasn't like well Do we you did sort of speak out a ton? But instead Erica's kind of signing off on what to read said, was when to read, it's like, oh, making it sound like I was bashingly Savannah pump. And Erica goes, bashing less a bit much. And I was like, this is surprising.

And then I remembered that Erica hates Teddy. Quite least she hates Teddy. I was like, I don't love Vanderpump either. Don't forget that. That's true, too. But this whole thing really, it really wasn't, I mean to me, it really wasn't that big of a deal. Jereet being an idiot, trying to look like a big girl

and talking about the big boss when she's gone and then getting caught. But really what she said wasn't that so bad. It's just what happened. Yeah, but it was still, it wasn't so bad, but it was, it was sort of, it was still sort of shitty, you know, it was a little shitty for someone, for someone who says how much she loves her and la la la la, and like the moment that Lisa walks out, this is twice now having a palihouse as well, that to reach

a sort of turns and it's just like, well, she's so, she's airing all of Lisa's business saying that she's needy and yada yada yada in front of a whole group and she's saying it in sort of like a big sort of sticky way. She's saying that Lisa's jealous and all this stuff. I don't know, it's just like not, it's not the nicest thing and then the fact that she denies it is what, you know.

I know, I think all that's true. It's just to see, it's just kind of, I feel like I'm with Eric on this and it's like, oh, we're still talking about this. God damn it, Mary. Jesus Christ. Robert Banks, here's something interesting for crafts. Sake, right? Exactly.

But I also, oh, sorry, I love that. I love that Lisa Vanim from one of the Teddy, Teddy, you're fine. I was like, ooh, wow. Teddy just got, that's like the equivalent of getting the scepter on the shoulder being Lisa knighted. That probably means you'll be fired after the season, but still, you know, except it when I'm giving it out. Oh yeah, I take ownership of that, you know?

And I love ownership. And if it doesn't bother you, then don't buy, if it bothers you, then don't say it, okay? If you don't want to own something, don't sign papers at a card dealership and then try to vote the lemon law, okay? I'm deady. Yeah, I mean, you just could call me the scapegoat. No, no, you're not a scapegoat. I hate goats escape, darling, I have to send Hanky and Peggy after them. You're not a scapegoat. You're brave a question. Your return goat. Um, so dinner time, um, the Vanderpump and Carla joking around about pastor. She's like, why would you put the pastor in front of me?

Carlworth! Um, then Cam gives a speech about cancer, which is super sad. I felt like Camille, she's like talking about my mother's cancer and I've gone to cancer to spin years since I went through radiation and I was expecting to retie her that. Camille, you're a steep and cut fitness. You know, cancer is really terrible and also I have the vagina of a 16 year old. And everyone's like, cheers, darling. Well done, darling.

So Lisa is gonna go. Because Camille's like, thank you, thank you. And Lisa, Lisa's here. So thank you for coming. And she's like, yes, well, as soon as I knew Dread was coming, I said, I'm out. And she's like, it's my pre-birthday night.

Can't really need me there. I'm like, can's my pre-birthday, not can't really needs me there. My can has been asleep since 6 p.m. With a puppy going. So Dorita's eyes she's gonna escort Lisa out, you know, to the door. And Lisa's like, what, what has got, like, I am literally leaving a little bit early, because you just leave me alone, please. I'm literally leaving a little bit early. You're leaving! Only showy soap, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, I love it. What's wrong with you?

Then they cut to Erica at the table and she's like, Oh yeah, wow, I wanted a brick though. You know, I want to look like an 80s drug dealer. And then they cut back to the fight. Like that is such a cut to Erica. Yeah, classic. So Doree just wants to make sure she's in good place with Lisa. And basically her plans, that she's just going to smother her with attention and love and kisses and

Cuddles and hugs until Lisa relents But it doesn't work that way with real British people As opposed to Connecticut British people Yeah, she jumps on her and won't let her leave and like starts like literally smothering her with her love and Kind of wants like well, maybe stradding your husband when your own trouble works, but it won't work. Yeah Zingar. Then, this does the classic. I'm a little bit hurt about what you said, but I'm okay.

I'm okay. I'm sure I'll be able to fly again, even though I'm a bit of a broken bird at the moment. I mean, at least I'll get proud he's seating when I get to board the next airplane. Bring the preckin birds in, oh! I hope I can make it all the way back to Beverly Hills from Malibu as I do have some wounded wings on account of being a broken bird hit by the rock of Oh god, so Doree just won't quench the- Please, don't you want to go skipping through a deal that never hurt you, Lisa? This is like whatever. It's gonna take a lot more time in this season for you to pay your debts, Miss Capital One. What's in your wallet? I'll tell you what's in Teddy's wallet. A good heart, she's wonderful, I love him more now.

Also a key card to my horse is stable so she can write it whenever she would like to because she can write it so much better than I can. Ooh, so Vanderprom's like, I think that you're the needy one now, she's like, I love Yalisa. And she says, yes, I know you love me, just not enough. Goodbye! Goodbye, bye, Miss American, bye.

I drove my Chevy to the levee, but the levee was dry. What happened next Lisa? Tell me. Tell me. I forgot Lionel Richie didn't give me that many of the lyrics, you know? It was a duet after all. That is a song rich about the day that you betrayed me. One is the loneliest number. It's a level no. Because it's the sound of silence.

People say I'm the life of the party. When I tell a joke or two do do do do do wow so to read it's like I hope for some myself on her makes me realize I didn't mean to hurt her but please don't say that during the me two movement yeah during yeah please like at least have least have some self-awareness here. Yeah. Lisa at this point is so annoyed with Dory that she has to bus out a brand new interview look.

She's like, fine. Here's my gold look to show how annoyed I am at my former protégé. Like Lisa, people might be complaining that the season is boring. Could you come back? Well, I've already given that other dress to Rosy. Rosia, Rosisoso. Rosisasa. So, um, yeah, so basically, yes, to read is like, I love you, I love you, I love you, and Vandrum just leaves. And then we go to a place called Shape House, where Teddy, huh, I'm Teddy, is there with her client Dana, but unfortunately it's not the Dana

that we were all hoping it would be. I thought for a second it was gonna be. Did I say, is that Dana? She's like pointing at her like, her sweat contraption, she's writing to see this, $50,000. Dana Wilkie, yeah. $50,000, $50,000.

So Teddy's like, yeah, so I'm like an accountability coach and I know you all want to roll your eyes at it, but like honestly, it's like I call you and I'm like, I'm on your ass. And I kind of was like, the fact that she knows that we're rolling our eyes at what she does, made me like her more. She like, she made me accountable for my own jokes. I would have said She does she's like an expert. She's really good at what she does Self-deprecation works every time it really does I would know It worked like a charm and then I was thinking like it's true like we all we've been laughing about the fact that she's an accountability coach

But how many times have we all been like I just wish I had someone who would just call me up and be like, did you eat well today? Did you work out today? And that's like what she does. And then we make fun of it. Yeah, I don't want that. Especially paying a bunch of money. She's like, send me a picture of that menu

and I'll tell you what to eat. Okay. And this thing was all natural. She's like, so, tell me about how you found me in your journey. And you know, just basic testimonial. Just go ahead. I'm not like that. Okay, basically. Yeah. Yeah And you know, just basic testimonial. Just go ahead. Not like that.

Okay, basic. Yeah. Yeah. You can, this is basically a help review. It can be just like, we're just gonna workshop your, your help review here on camera if that's cool. Yes, there doesn't need to be a TV show about your audience, okay?

So they get into basically zip lock bags and they are, they are sweat intensifying suits and then they're gonna get into an infrared bed where they will have so much sweat, it'll be sloshing around in their bag. And it looks awful, it looks terrible. And the reason why I thought it looked awful is because they're in these bags

and only their head is popping out. So it's already gonna get hot and uncomfortable. But what happens when they're face-erbs to sweat? Because my instinct would be to wipe, I wanna wipe my forehead off, but I wouldn't be able to, because my arms are trapped in a bag. I don't know, like there were something that made me feel anxious about watching this.

Yeah, they look like a roasted chicken at Ralph's, basically. Yeah. So then she shows the picture. Plus you know that you didn't have to see and there's probably trapped in some bag in the corner for like, she's been there for like a month, but you're like, let me out. Yeah, she's just writing, fuck you tweets to everybody,

misspelled from a silver bag on the floor. With heart emojis. Yeah. So Dana's like, well, you know, I was working out, but I was still thick. And then I saw your transformation on Insta. And then they show her transformation. I'm sorry, but that is Teddy with the six pack.

And then it's Teddy with the six pack sticking out or stomach. You could still see the lines of her muscles while she was sticking out or stomach. Come on now. That's not even real looking. I really wish we'd gotten a chance to see another picture of Teddy at 21

with the catch up in mustard highlights and hunched over being like, hi, I'm Teddy, but I'm a little thick right now. Yeah, I'm good. I like that picture. She's like, hi. I love 21 year old, try to Teddy. Oh, Teddy! so let's see

Now we go to my office, I have an office everyone. I have an office. Not we work. It's called Every single work The Eric is in has a really nice bed here when dumb druddy is ready to kick her out of the I like a lot of fuck work. So Mikey's like, that's Hulk A thing. It's gonna be a big thing. It's gonna be a big thing. I'm right. So it turns out she's gonna be in the Kim Kardashian game.

Yeah. It's, you know, good for you. Yeah. Hey, actually, I would be excited. I would be excited. I'd like to say, I actually, I was like, this is so cool. I'm not going to even try to be cool. Like, oh my god, our podcasters, like whatever you're in a game. No, I like this is so cool I'm not going to even try to be cool like oh my god our podcasters like whatever you're in a game no I thought this was so cool

yeah I would be I would like thrilled to be in the Kim Kardashian game secret here's a little here's a little um a little something about my past my background is that um I obviously love video games and I used to always um want to design my own video game like I would when I was a kid I would like draw super Mario boards and like a little notebook like over and over I just like tons and tons of these boards as I got older. I started learning different computer languages like Basic like I'm so basic, but I would I would create little video games and basic and then hypercard and then in college I took computer science

and I learned JavaScript and Java and all this stuff. And like, there is a version of my life where I wouldn't have gone down this path and I would have become a computer programmer because I just love all that shit. And when I saw this, I was like, oh my God, I want to learn how to make an app and I want to make a water crappens app, and we'll be a game.

And I don't know what it'll be, but it'll be the most fun thing ever. So just wait. Oh hell, yeah, do it. So everyone, if you are listening, just wait, give it about three years, and then we'll see where we're at. Three years. We're all on Golden Pond. It'll just be two old people in a boat.

But how fun would that be? About the ass lives. Wouldn't that be so fun if we had boat. But how fun would that be? That's the housewives. Wouldn't that be so fun if we had a watch or crap in this game? That would be like... Oh yeah! Everything in my life all together. It's gonna be fun. This better be done by the end of day tomorrow!

Oh you'll never know what it's like to be held by Mama Bird again! She is, at least the fan of up is like a Disney villain like... If you want to have a curse lifted, make your app. By this time tomorrow and sunset, if it is not in the iTunes store, you will be banished. Deliverosa. You will never go to a ball again.

So the game developers come and Erica Jane's like, Erica Jane is that intentional. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, is that intentional. Ah, ah, ah, never gonna die. I'm a moron. It's like the walking hot dead. Erica Jane. Oh, truly is expensive to be her now. Well, it now apparently costs $1.99. Yeah.

It's like, sorry, it's just like my real life. I came here in a toilet at a cellar club I could definitely sit in her. I blew an old guy down the dimension. The end. I came here in a toy at a salika, but because the Bentley Center I blew an old guy now I'm gonna mention The end! I've never had more empathy for her, you know. I've driven a toy at a salika. That is a hard... That's a hard life to live. I wouldn't... I wouldn't want to wish a toy at a salika on anyone.

Well, it was the Volkswagen Rabbit, I'll tell you that. I thought it would turn me into a lot of day Connie's helicopter but it just turned me into a girl who worked in the center city ball. So I'm going to do all my 80s azure references this this hold on in about two minutes we got a dynamano for reference coming through. A little empty mess mess. Tell me, Adams, you know, all that stuff. So next up is one of Lisa's fancy ass lunch parties where she's like, get out the best. Oh, what an escape. I'm just going to say that just real briefly, Eric

I started to cry when she saw her little Kim Kardashian, you know, drawing rendering. And I just thought that was like really hilarious. That this is the most emotional we've seen out of our all season long. The singer in the Kim Kardashian game. And it's the realest emotion we've seen out of her ever, which will emotion a real joy at real tears. Do you think they'll be a record Ralph crossover with the arc of Jane? Cause that would also be really satisfying.

We can only dream, Ben. We can only dream. We ask you a question. Yes. What is better? Laser original potato chips or ruffles? Ruffles. Okay. Thank you. I'm on yummy dot com right now. Oh, I thought you were gonna segue into Lisa Vanderpump But then she wasn't wearing her pirate ruffles for her party. No, she wasn't, but she's having one of those parties where you remember when you're a kid and your mom's like, we have to get, we're going to a party. There's going to be other kids there and you're like, oh, this sucks.

It's going to be lame. That's a Lisa party. Every time she has a daytime party, it's like, put out the best China. We're going to party like it's 1999. Mine is 10 years That's sheener map Cuz tonight we're gonna party like it's 1985 I

Was 30 I mean 10 So Kevin Lee Kevin Lee she she she Beverly Hills is is doing the of course planning the party and Lisa comes out on balcony in like a in a white or a cream pants suit situation He's like, oh wow look at you. You look gorgeous. Not like that waitress girl of yours Katie. You are so fat. Oh Congratulations to your birthday and you haven't gained weight Lisa So proud of you. You won't stop by your girlfriend, your waitress. She, a cautionary tale. So rude.

Also she's like, um, yes, well, is this party vandal pop ready? Because we're going to have an excruciating audience. Oh my god, geez. Get over yourself. And I like that Kevin even makes her come downstairs to talk He's like, yeah, well you are not really at so I'll tell you that much come downstairs if you want to talk Lisa She's she's she's definitely here. It's your home. Oh, so she comes downstairs and she's like I want it to be a gorgeous thing for them to come to And there's like huge Camille size martini glasses full of shrimp and stuff. I can't actually say

that's just absolutely beautiful. I'm like, I mean, I would I would appreciate getting that because I love going to town or shrimp cocktail, but I would not say it was the most refined presentation of all. It was like lost Vegas, you know. Yeah, Lisa Yikes. So she's like,

well, I've got to listen to Joker watches you gather the gaze. So all's like, well, I've got a little joke I want to do gather the gaze. So all the staff gaze come around and she's like, the big fight with Dorita was about glasses. So let's give Dorita glass of rosé out of what's the worst glass I have. Oh, look, give it a spore of secretive glass. Look at that stupid glass. Give it that one. Look ridiculous. And then her gay John who runs her documentary is her dog store and now her party for some reason. Yeah, the any John, you know.

He's like, well, just tell her about everything. I was like, oh, it's dirty. Baja. I was secretly very invested in this joke. I was like, I want to see how this plays out. So, and then she's like, let's take some his out of Dread. It may get me in trouble, but that's just Lisa van der Pompadale. Oh, yeah, I'll live in Elbehid with those glass jokes. Yeah, that's so Lisa. So, um, we then get it close up on Hanky and, uh, Teddy and her man

show up and it's the big litmus test. Can they get to the front door without Hanky and Hanky and Teddy and Hermann show up and it's the big litmus test. Can they get to the front door without Hanky and Hanky clacking at them? And unfortunately they can. The swans disapprove of Teddy and Hermann. Yeah, even the Teddy. So they call him Teddy, that's me. Oh Teddy, I'm so glad you're here. New favorite. Did I tell you about the joke I'm you playing? Under it, make all you serve champagne. Oh no, Rosé. You're in the green glass. The green and the pink and the look brown.

Would you like a drink? What kind of glass would you like it in? Guetting, guetting. She's like, wow, I'm really laughing at this joke, but it's pushing me. Not going. I said for you something in a plastic cup just kidding I never go into Russia's kitchen. Did you know if you poor tea in a plastic cup you could get it as he's very bad for you. So Edmund's like why did that swan run from us?

Never mind let's make class jokes you you. So, Tariq, I think your swans are awake. I'm given a hanky my phone number, I hope that's not offensive. I'm gonna call hanky every single day and check in on him, make sure he's eating enough pellets. Whoa, Frankie just sent me a text. I think he's eating too much breadcrumbs. Do you wanna tell him or me? He sent me a meme. I don't know.

So then PK and Doree come and the black swans are fully quacking at them. Just in a cheesy. They're like quack, quack danger, quack, quack, quack, quack. Get them like that, quack, quack. Yes, he's got like ankle cuffs because you know those swans love some cancels. Run, Doree, run. I mean, what quickly? You know what I mean? Get the baseball bat out of the car. God damn it. I will not have the brain behind Beverly Beach be assaulted by these swans.

You go ahead, I'll stay back here and fend them off. And Lisa's standing there thrilled with her new joke. She's like, hello! Welcome to Belarus! Okay, calm down over there, Lisa. And Dreece's like, you look every bit that goes, it's gonna be a fair part, Lisa. Well, can I get you a Doreen car? And sure enough, even though Doree orders champagne,

they bring her rosé and the green glass. And Teddy's just already laughing. Like Teddy, you gotta like, yeah, let the joke breathe. Like a fine rosé itself. Like let's see her reaction, but the reed starts like, Lisa, guys, guys, I'm not drinking at this green glass. Goys, goys. I'm like, I can't tell if she's in on the joke or not.

I'm not drinking. Yeah, I think she's in on it. Because she's being like, Lisa, the glass. Oh, oh! Oh, I can take it! Well, I know that she's in on the joke because then in her interview she's like, she says something about it's ridiculous and then she picks up a tumbler full of rosé and sips out of it. She's like, not funny Lisa and she drinks out of it and I was was like, yeah, that's cool that you're embracing the joke, but it's also kind of fucked up because you were like so obnoxious to Teddy about it

and you had like a whole fight about it. And then once Lisa calls you on it, you're like, oh, I can play along with it. I'm like, mm, mm, mm, mm. Too late, too late. It's a little obnox. So they cheers and Lisa's like, thank you to everyone who came and to Rina

who sent me some flowers in my code Peep pink and pink so thank you for making an effort Lisa Rina who I've forgiven and have no idea is talking behind my back currently Maybe Adrian Maloof could learn a thing or two about a floral arrangement here, huh? Maybe rest in peace like she's not dead yet. Oh Herude of me Huh? Huh? May she rest in peace? Like she's not dead yet. Oh! Herude of me. Ha ha ha. So she starts opening presents and Erica gives her a scarf and she's like,

Oh! Erica! Erica! Oh! What a thoughtful Pashmina! This goes to Russia. Ha ha ha ha ha. But did you read it?

No, and I will not. So guess Eric has warm me up to me It says dear Rosie. Oh, this is for you don't let me ever see it again. It's idiot So, what is this what is this card here? I don't understand it. Oh, that's just like gift certificate You can redeem it for free copy of Kim Kardashian theme game video me Teddy she opens Teddy's gift next and it's a pink bear back pad in John runs in he's like, oh sorry put the run card on that John Renton, he's like, oh sorry, put the wrong card on that. Yeah, it's dangerous when you offer a bear back pad in my solid one. Yes. Where can I get those? So Lisa loves it.

It's actually a really good gift. I think it's arguably a best gift because it addresses something that Lisa loves. And actually, it's really in Teddy's sweet spot. And I realize I'm defending Teddy a lot this episode. Just let's just go with it. It's March. It's a new month. It's a new outlook on Teddy for me. Yeah, why not? But it's actually a really, really nice gift considering. She's like nailed it.

Yeah, she's like, I don't know about fashion because you know, I'm like down to earth and everything. But I do know about saddles because, you know, I've been writing horses all my life, so I don't know if I mentioned that or not, but so Lisa just sees the end, you know, Lisa's like, Daddy, you are my new best friend, come sit next to mama Let me rub your head So she's like, you're my new best friend and to read, starting to get that look and she said it's my turn it's my friend she's like oh it seems to be a bracelet made out of moons and he goes it's the clips Lee sir like the eclipse of our relationship to be like I don't get it we were in this at least it's like we were in the shade for a little while get it shade like I'm giving you right now.

I'm really down! So you bought that from a girl named Claire, I thought it was very nice. She has all these boutiques all over the world. I support women. What's this shade you're talking about? Do you have a parasol for me? Do you want a parasol? I can get you one right now.

I love you Lisa, I do whatever you want. I do whatever you want. Let me sit with Teddy sit me I'm spitting all over my laptop by the way. I just want to know I'm spitting everywhere this these impersonations So then it's can me all give sir bunny ears with a veil on them, which is so depressing They will have you know, I was gonna give you a timer that counts down how long Ken has left. But I said, I'll just give you this. You're prepared. It's a burning and morning. Okay. I guess that's actually it's like, I guess if you have like a wake fetish. Yeah. I guess they gave you this free when you were at that lingerie store with Rina. So thanks. Oh, wake fetish. Sorry, I heard that late. We've got cookies and dead guy bonas.

It's a wake stop party. Oh my god. So then blah blah blah. Eric is like, well, you know, Matt Tal Bandapot does it every insult. She's dinner joke. I was like, it's not she's dinner joke. She's fucking with her. Like, people, I mean, Vanderpump really did not ease up.

She was way too much with all of this, I think, but still, no. I think Turnabout is fair play. Doreet mess with, you know, the Queen Bee, the Queen Bee who got her on the show, who took her side, who like kept her on the show and you know, stood up for her when everyone hated her and to what the first thing to read does, she goes after Vanderpump in admittedly not as a venomous way as Brandy did or as sneaky way as you're long to did, but she's still like, you know, she stepped out of line. So this is what she gets and I am, I love it. I think it's hilarious.

So everyone's starting to get uncomfortable because Banner Pump really is just like throwing him out there one after the other. And then Camille gives to her gift, which by the way, call back to season one when she had Kylie gift, which was a book that was like, how to have manners Kyle. I think it was called how to behave. Oh yeah, how to behave. You guys like really a book? So I'm a writer.

So now Camille is like, oh, I have a gift for you to read. So I'm already like, oh my god, it's a Camille gift. It's all coming back. It's all happening. And then she opens it and it's a bright pink ball gag. And Lisa's like, what is that? Is that the thing you put in your mouth? I'm like, yes, Lisa, it's an apple.

Okay. Some apple. I love that everyone at Beverly Hills for temps they don't know what Amy's sexual thing is. And Erica goes, I love a ball gag. Yeah, Erica, we figured. She's like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh Erica we figured she's like, oh, she's like laughing. She goes, love me for fashion. I mean, look at my Instagram. And I love that nobody has.

How do you spell your last name again, dear? So Camille just like, you're up in your mouth too much, girlie. I love this side of Camille's. Camille tells us. Hopefully she'll get the message, which is, shut up, bitch. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, oh. Wow, ma. And to reach, sure, got it.

She was all of a sudden, I mean, for someone who gave some moons to to Lisa Vanderbomb, she was one looking very crestfallen at that moment. Get it! Yes. Oh, crest has fallen to a reed. I've never worn that crest again. What do you think of that, Pee-Key? Once upon a time I was falling in love, now I'm only falling apart.

Da-da-da-da, total eclipse of the de reed. There we go. Song parody. Oh, de reed the Doreed. There we go. Song parody. Oh, Doreed dancing on our own. So lunch, they have lunch and it's like finger sandwiches and a pk's like, so he's like, where's Mo? No, Mo, because Kyle comes late. And she's like, Scottsdale, open the agency there. We're calling it American woman agency class house. Like, congratulations. Welcome. By I lead to.

And then you just know that Lisa just like nudges Camille and it's like, watch this Camille watch. And she's like, hey teddy bear, teddy bear. How are you doing? Because you know the moment she said she calls Teddy teddy bear, they just cut it to read, looking so, so jealous. Yes, and she did too.

She's like, ooh, and P.K. He goes, oh, you've known it for five minutes. Whatever, you've known Dereet for 18 months, same thing. Dereet goes, oh, it's really hard being favorite guys. She calls me that all the time. And then P.K. goes, oh, well, you'll go from Teddy bed to Teddy bitch in five minutes, trust me. I'm like, that's a little rude.

And I'm surprised that Teddy was able to laugh that off. I mean, I think. I'm like, that's a little rude. And I'm surprised that Teddy was able to laugh that off. I mean, I think that's, I thought that was a little nasty. That's PK. Like she's already had dinner at PK's house. I think she's just prepared for everything now. Yeah. So crowd's like, um, what do you call the rest of us Lisa? And she's like, well, it starts with a B guess. Guess what it is.

Guess, guess, pick a guess a guess anyone anyone want to guess But balloons is that Lisa no you're wrong Anyone else Anyone but Bumble bees Lisa bumble I'm your little bumble bee is that it Lisa? There's someone here, boys. I don't know if you're anything. Bale Rina Lisa.

Oh, could you imagine LVP's like, Oh, my little Bale Rina's coming over later. Can you imagine to read on password? More to the point. So Lisa's like, Well, that beat, Joke didn't really work out. So Camille, what have you got to say, darling?

I'd like to open her up to punch on Doreet for a while. Yeah. So Camille's like, well, I forgot. But I did get this gift for her. Did you already open it? I forgot. It's a ball gag. Everyone's a ball gag. She talks too much. She talks too much. And then, yeah, Doreet's, Doreet is clearly not happy with his ball deck. Yes, now it's Doreet's pissed, right?

So Kyle's like, is that supposed to be for their sex life? And Doreet goes, oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, like, oh, I don't mind this. I'm not it's not offensive. It's not like it's a strap on. I was like, oh, Camille. I loved it. I've loved it. Camille is ready to fight. She is like, she is doing what she can to earn back that diamond. I think if she continues with this,

I think she's back next season. If she goes on the trajectory because she's really killing it. And to read, she's still hopping on something that was a joke a few months ago. She's like, well then why isn't this a joke? Then why isn't this a joke? This is a joke. This is a joke.

This is a joke. So you need a joke. America's like, do we? Motherfucker, if you don't laugh this off right now, I'm gonna crucify you. And literally, I don't King George. I fucked him for this crown. The crown I'm wearing right now. Little bit of ballback.

Cause the madness of him and George, it's not easy to be mad. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, like King George. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, well, it was a good time to give it to me. Oh, no, but there. Oh, got the batteries, the victim. Don't take it to seriously, bitch. So PK tells Daryl, maybe it's fine. It's fine, baby. Boba, Boba, baby, let's move on.

Let's move on. I've got a red face. I don't know what I'm allergic to. I think it's the lettuce and the salad. So just be quite, Daryl. That's the lettuce and the salad. So just be quiet, Dary. Oh God. Dary was so, Dary was so mad. She was seething right there. I was so wonderful. Well, I love that Dary will finish her food before she leaves. Oh, yeah. So me. So I'm eating this free dinner and then I'm leaving, ma'am. Well, because she doesn't want to ever be accused of being rude. ate the meal she didn't leave early. She just felt like they had celebrated enough. That's all, you know

Yeah, and Kyle of course is just loving this. She's loving watching Leafs have punished her You know Because you know Kyle has lived through it and she's like I warned you. I warned you because, you know, Kyle has lived through it and she's like, I warned you, I warned you. So pretty much now, Vanderpump is like, oh, well, she gets a $75,000 for something from her husband and she's like, here, you can have my own costume, Julie, Doreed.

And Doreed. Thank you, Lisa. Well, how good of a friend, oh, yeah. Like trying again and she's like, well, a few days ago, I would have given you the earrings off of my back, but not now, Dory. And this is it, you know, Dory's like, okay, that's it. So Kyle's like, uh, told you so. Yeah. So she's gonna do that. So then Lisa's like, I would like to go to Pumlin tonight, who is coming and then Dory's like, well, I don't think I'm gonna go. And then

Dory, you have to, not after today, I don't, I don't have to. I'm independent. All the ladies are independent, throw your hands up at me, because I'm independent, PK. That's the me had a child and she was a little brat, who doesn't speak on her back. Lisa, say my name, say my name. No read, no read, no read. No read. So he says, no read, no read, no read. I say yes, read, yes, read, yes, read. You see, it's like a few luck was celebrated.

Now I'm going to go home and my big brown sit car. We need to drop it off at the Hertz for a check-in. Goodbye, Lisa. She's like, I didn't expect to be the punching bag today. I was like, well, that's what makes it so great for us to read. Thank you so much. Thank you for coming in and being so oblivious to think you could ever come for the queen and get away with it.

And did you notice that the topper on the cake was a ballerina topper? It's like she's even adding Eden in there. It's so good. So beautiful birthday, Lisa. Guys, thank you. And then, we just get up and leave. And then the camera focuses on Kyle.

And did you notice this? There's a, to read leaves, the camera then soups over to Kyle. And then you just hear this magical chime. Like, it's had like a fairy, like a spell had been lifted. It was just like, Kyle was just so happy. The same, Jellic, I can't, I obviously cannot do a chime impersonation,

but it was great. And Camille, and Camille picks up the ball again. Don't forget this. Oh, it was so good. And only Erica laughs. Everyone's like, okay, who's this is how it's going to be enough.

So Madhuri has made herself the victim. So she runs out and Lisa follows her. So Madhuri has made herself the victim. So she runs out and Lisa follows her and how Lisa's like, are you okay? Are you upset about the ball gag thing? What is it? Did you not love the martini glasses with the shrimp? Like she really does. You can take one if you want, but you're quote unquote Moroccan beans in them. It'll be very elegant. And she's like, no, it was a funny joke joke Lisa. I just need to go figure out what this Beverly Beach is doing to my laugh and Vanderpump's like, yes to read.

I'm gonna have a jab. I'll cover it in just, oh she did! There's some would say, but the relationship has taken over different meaning for me. And who is Beverly Beach? Is that your accountant? Yes. Yes. for me. And who is Beverly Beach? Is that your accountant? So next is this photo shoot,

which seemed like kind of shoved in here. They're redoing a photo shoot with the little Truman Capote guy, the lower end Truman Capote. And he's like fabulous, everything's fabulous. My mom even liked that but you know what? Derrick was really negative about her photos and Lisa's like well Clearly I got it wrong last time so I'm glad we've got a new model with a vagina in the air Which has everything to do with jewels? Yeah, basically they're redoing the photo shoot that that Derrick complained about so much and There makes it sound like it was Mark's decision because he doesn't want any negativity around a photo shoot. He doesn't want that or swirling around his magazine. I don't know, I question how much

was Mark's decision or how much was Samoa, at least I've had a pump revenge on Doreet. But either way, she's like, now I catch you out. Goodbye. The fact that it was wedged in at the end of the episode, like that the episode did not end on the dinner party makes me feel like this is going to be a significant thing. Like they're saying, okay, we're leaving on this because this is going to now be a source of controversy for the rest of the season, you know, like why I was a little bit told, etc. I love it. I love a petty move like that.

Like, take away those photos from Doree. And the fact that Lisa's like, she looks beautiful, she looks so wonderful, but the world will never get to see it because of her own choices. I was like, who? Yes, yes. I support my best making their own choices, even if it leaves you breaking. And not be in magazines. I want 163 people who receive this magazine will never see to read. And that brings us to the end of some Beverly Hills. Yes. Oh my God. Such a good episode. I love passive aggression on TV. Good times. It's Wednesday. This is normally a time for listener spot light. Good times, it's Wednesday, this is normally a time for listener spotlight.

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You know, it's all over. It's all over. You will not be able to buy your tickets anymore because the show will be We'll be happening be done. Yeah, all, everybody. We will talk to you next time. We'll see you later. Bye, everyone. Bye. Bye. Bye. Hey, prime members.

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