Watch What Crappens - RHOBH: Beverly Hills Brexit

Episode Date: February 8, 2018

On this week's Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Kyle, Dorit, and Lisa are all in a pissing match over who's the better friend. Or who deserves compassion. Or who's closer with whom? It's so petty it's almost perfect. Comes check out our recap of this hilarious episode! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch what crapence would like to think it's premium sponsors!

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we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker from BESIDEBLOG.com, and the Benter Blender podcast, and joining me on this joyous, joyous day, is a man who waits for no one, even if he has a gift. It's Ronnie Caron from trashactv.com, and the Rosepricks Bachelor podcast, what's up Ronnie? Wafin, I've never seen you act like this before in all of our years and years! Fiend, Fiend, Fiend. I'm terribly sorry, Ronnie, but the traffic just ridiculous. We have a scene such ridiculous traffic, Ronnie.

Guys, it's ridiculous. Ridiculous. There is nothing worse than an LA person talking about how that traffic is. Guess who else traffic sucks for? Everybody who lives in fucking LA, lady. Okay? And I made it to this restaurant, and it's not even a van to pump pink restaurant with giant pops on the everywhere. Chef Penny. I don't she's both. I'm ordering off a foreign menu for you and you made me wait to eat. We have an extra extra petty episode of Beverly Hills to recap today.

But we would be remiss if we didn't show our own shows that are absolutely ridiculous. You all have to go. Go to watchocrapids.com to buy tickets to our live shows. We are all over the country for the next several months, places like Irvine, California, West Palm Beach. Atlanta, Philadelphia. Congratulations to Philadelphia. We are going to celebrate your Super Bowl victory this summer Where else we're all over the place?

I'm gonna go out of the street knock over dump trucks and shit. It's gonna be amazing guys We're gonna show this town how you really fuck up a city that's that is right St. Louis Kansas City all over the place So go to watch your crap and calm to buy your tickets and there were some screwy things that were going on with the Philly tickets in terms of VIP. Just if you got, I believe if you got a, the VIP tickets didn't go on sale immediately. So if you have a general admission ticket and you want upgrade to VIP, you can do that too. So watchrocraftens.com, follow the ticket links there, and also buy

your merchandise there. Yes, well, that's an awesome way to get that over with me. Now, I'd like to apologize to the girl on Twitter who gave me a very simple request. Could you please stop using your screechy, screamy, direct voice? It's making me cringe and I wrote back no but I will try to get further away from the mic. I know it's a noxious this hell trust me I have neighbors I have friends they're all like shut up with that doesn't even make sense I don't care you can't just change midstream darling you can't also last week I made a big

hullabaloo about the fact that when PK and Dereet arrived, like landed from their helicopter on yacht number one, that Alex from below deck season one was there to help them onto the dinghy. And I was like, you guys, there was a crossover. Little did I realize I was so absorbed in like patting myself on the back for seeing Alex. I totally ignored Bobby from below deck med, helping them onto the dinghy also. So it was a double crossover And it's funny because sometimes there are these things that we miss

That the audience is like really really determined that we get right We got so many tweets and emails and ads about Bobby being on the dinghy. It was insane It was absolutely insane. So we want everyone to know we have heard you and we are correcting ourselves. Just like we're life, I look over Bobby. Yeah. I'll be doing it all this season on a load to Mediterranean. Mad. Okay. A load. Dic. A load even say it the right way. I couldn't even say it without the blow dick. Oh, wait, don't introduce. I know it's going to totally make my deride is going to be from like Perth now to be like, you guys, you guys, I just

came in from here. Listen, hear that in my body. I tell it. I told the Westin city, get out of my West Coast of Australia. Peace. Doesn't make sense. You know what I've been doing all week long? Gator to my worst co-stival, Australia. Peace. That's a nice sense. You know what I've been doing all week long?

Ever since the last episode. I keep going up and going. I love Black Tide. I love Black Tide. I love Black Tide. Fucking Lisa Rina. They showed that at the beginning of this episode, and I died.

I love Black Tide. Woohoo! Was there, was there like a clip that was an online exclusive that involved Lisa, Erica and Eileen? Because Eileen posted a video of her coming by to say hello like having lunch with Erica and Rina and I was like I don't seem to remember this at all. Oh Eileen you've been cut. It's sad, but even your guest appearance doesn't make it onto the main show, it's just saved for you know secrets revealed in 20 months from now. Anyway, so this week's episode opens up with a Doreet at home going baby baby come into the green room come on don't be ridiculous get into the green room right now guys baby baby baby baby baby baby I love

you babe you are a machine babe a bridge machine a favorite kind of machine babe it was an amazing birthday party. Beyond, babe. Beyond, babe. P.K. P.K., you're just flattering yourself now. Anything else you'd like to say about the birthday party? P.K.? I'd like to open a store called Bed, Babe, and Beyond, Babe. That's how beyond it was, babe.

And then we see memories of the party that was so long ago and it's done to James Bond music. I have never seen a sadder looking 50 year old man in my life. That man is not 50 and I don't know if I said this last year and by the way I'm a chunky out of shape pace your mother fucker too who drinks too much and gets rosacea okay so I'm not even throwing stones I'm just saying that is not a 50. Someone tweeted this last week, a Wikipedia, Wikipedia live. It would be a big big. I can't. I'd be like a machine on Wikipedia.

And it said age 50 born 1947 or something. It's not good. You don't even know how to edit your own wiki. Darling, come on. I just like to imagine PK actually being James Bond and just being the worst installment in the franchise Just even the opening credits, you know when you see James Bond walking and like the bullet sight follows him along You just know you just see PK walking and then bullet sight is like wait, where James Bond going? Like has to go back like oh wait, you're still at that part of the screen

Okay, we'll wait What was that thing's ever is like Dandand and then just like the gum and just turns the gun on itself like I can't Rose gold babe Red gold thinker all right babe. Yeah performance babe cool thing, girl. All right, babe. You're performing, babe. You're performing, George, and say, she was this babe. Who is this babe? Babe. Q. Is the other name?

Let's have Thomas name I ever heard, babe. Like, I'm giving you your orders. I'm not listening to someone who calls themselves question. Ah, James, James, I'm sorry. I'm terribly sorry. I don't think I can make it to the checkpoint in time. Traffic in East Berlin is absolutely ridiculous right now. But I'll be there as soon as possible. We were

supposed to have a rendezvous with 430 in my right, James. Or was it across the town in this fast-boost car to get you? Hold on, I'm waiting at the Hertz rental. Right. Hi, James. James Bond is it? So it turns out my driver just can't even figure out these streets. But what's supposed to mean is that 530, right? So I'm not terribly late. Am I please dumb? I'm not terribly right, James.

James, are you still there? I'm exhausted by you. Sorry, Phil. Slick there for a second. She just shows up. It up dead body. Oh, You know, I feel terrible that James Bond was killed because I didn't get him to necessary dossier But to be fair we did agree that we're gonna meet at six thirty and I was action hour early, so I don't know. I mean, I just feel like how can I be

Working with this secret agent if he's gonna hold me to standards. It's just a little ridiculous don't you think? Secret agent man Like blow their cover everywhere they go KK He's a secret agent man. I'm so proud of him He was under cover we just stop him. Yeah, they walk into they walk into a ball together And she just like turns someone's like, can I tell you something ridiculous?

He's not even my husband. He's a secret agent. I'm such a silly cut fitness, aren't I? Bubbly! Is it because I love my fake husband more? Did I say fake? Rima. She turns, she's like,

secretly, I've been rima for so long! Rift's off her mask. Dary, we have some terrible news. James Bond has been... Lillie! Yeah! Like a mom!

Cute! Like, we're supposed to be hardy. So he's he's the worst But I'll do one more of it now to read when you meet me just remember our code Can you say what the code word is again? It's bubbly. Got it When you hear that when you hear that when you hear the church ring you said a Secret word got it When you hear the church ring, you say the secret word. Got it. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you.

Why they have to keep recasting James Bond because the re-fucked it up for every single one. The abort code word is, and the everything's fine is got it got it all right if everything's fine I'll say boom okay sorry you were trying to recap someplace and I'm like no no time to play sound effect VK is such an asshole he's like babe your performance with George was sensational because George loves to sing with people who can't sing you know and she's like well thanks to Lord baby like you know when you go out with

the super fat person because you look slimmer like what do you think she's doing? You think you don't know that stop quoting her vows her vows. I promise to have and told you until you get to heavy and then I'll look at dinner until we go! Guys guys can we talk about Kauil for second? Because I don't know I was talking with Teddy Melon Cump and I don't know what to talk about wine glasses and meanwhile Kauil is speaking on Teddy's behalf defending her guys it's just it's a bit much I think I don't know, talk about wine glasses and meanwhile, Coil is speaking on Tay's behalf defending her guys. It's just, it's a bit much, I think. I don't know how I can be friends with it. Coil, guys.

Coil, guys. Coil, guys. Peek-kai. Um, she's wearing a Balenciaga baseball cap. I mean, shut up, Doreet. Okay? Your fucking cat can shut up too. You stupid hooker.

Just quiet over there, Doreet. So, yeah, basically goes to go. So damn amazing and magical. So then I get a TV. Oh my god. Great segue. Tada. Tada. So, uh, Doreet. She basically pissed. Yeah, she's pissed because because when she and and Teddy were having the fight over the wine glasses and everything Kyle Kyle was standing up for Teddy and she's like I just don't understand why Kyle wouldn't stand up for me I mean it's not what a real friend does isn't that what happens? Or is that just what a friend does who just is there to make me look thinner is that what she's there for? just what a friend does who just is there to make me look thinner. Is that what she's there for?

Oh, cold it, babe. Cold it. Cold that one, didn't you, babe? So she is, so she's there. They show her going to basically the place where Yolanda got her. Yolanda got proud, right? Yeah.

Wasn't that the same place? No, it was some place. So basically she got it. Well, no, I just, I just could read your brain. I didn't write it, but basically, you read my Yobanda, my Yobanda resentment that refuses to fade away. No, it's like that. You too, so I'm not not fade away. Not fade away my love, my love, Bono and my other one. So, um, so the, um, it's basically, Dari got a gift for PK from her and the kids, and she pulls out this doll, a figurine that's like her holding, like holding Phoenix and Jagga, and then we

see a flashback of her going to a place called Dub, where she stands, and essentially a repurposed cryotank, and they do like a three-dimensional three printing whatever which I thought for a moment I was like that's kind of cool Ronnie and I should do that and then I was like who would roast but that's weird yeah who wants that who wants a figurine of us yeah no offense to you or to me but you know what no one's gonna be more offensive than PK because oh look at that you look like Bob Restryson babe like really because Barbara Strysanth is like 60 something sir I thought that she looked like a Oh yeah, people who need people. I just ran off a cliff.

I was being chased by a big giant bird. P.K. That's the way we were. Get a P.K. Stride end. He's so horrible. He's like, thanks babe, that's amazing. I mean, what the hell is it though?

You look like Bob Astrice and Jagger looks like a ghost kid that haunts me. I'm like fat Bruce Willis here just staring at you guys. No one can see me but I can see you. But I love that great job babe, great job. Like here's such a dick okay. And then he drops it. And Phoenix is poor Phoenix, you know everyone on mine's like

she only cares about Jagger. You don't you never even see Phoenix. And then they break our Phoenix's head. Yeah, basically he places the figurine on a book. He's like, well okay babe, we'll go put it right here. So we'll never forget about it, babe. And he puts it there. And then he picks up the bag.

And then the tissue paper, the bag, knocks over this precarious doll. And it falls off the book. So, and the head just goes rolling off a rock across the floor. And then the re-holder knows. And she goes, take it away. Please, take it away

So then we so then we go over to Vanderpump dogs where Lisa shows up and Her gay I think his name is Jonathan. I don't know. He comes over his like wait a second. Can you just die? Look at this. It's a bag full of pub iris and like the bag open. I got a surprise for you. Papa. It's a bag of pop. But didn't he say to I've got two two little surprises for you? Yes. Well, the second was the court case. But the thing is this it's not a surprise. It was puppy. So I was like this queen can't count. How does he hold every job in the Vanderpump world without being able to count three?

I don't know. I just think that it's hilarious that every time she walks into the store, he's like, gas what? Pappy! How many times can you give, and every time she's surprised, I'm like, oh, Buffy! It's a Buffy! I was thinking this time for short, be a of saw jeans, but no it's another puppy.

It sounds like a monster at the very end of finally dying. It's like, you get in the head. Don't just leave it there. It's going to yeah! It's like kicking the head. Don't just leave it there. It's going to get back up. And this poor guy, by the way, you know, I sort of was under the impression that he's kind of like an executive of Vanderpump dogs as he was a producer on the documentary and he

seems to be at a high management level, like a Natalie Guillermo level at Vanderpump dogs. But he has to wear the silly Vant of Pump Dogs uniform. I'm like, I'm like, how much authority does he have in this business? Because if you're doing that much work and you got to wear the faux pump shirt, something's messed up.

Yeah, but you get to watch the little puppies, Ken's bookers out of his nose. That's all I mean. You know, they're spurx. Yeah. Yeah, Ken, I'm like, Ken enough. Like, it's really cute watching you love Fappies, but I don't need the to watch the puppies pick your nose for you. Okay, it's awkward

We've that moment that moment belongs to Jill's Aaron and it shall always stay it with Jill's Aaron and Ginger Ginger so I'm like great Hemp at eighth piece of great news today. I'm like wait a second bad counter He's like nice nice, nice, nice countering, Shane. Really, really got him, got him this time. That car has that fast. And Lisa's like, what wonderful news. When you're a public figure, you'll subject

to this litigious behavior. I'm like, figure. Come on Lisa. I like when Lisa just adds new, um, new sounds into her accent. Public figure. Well, she's, she's like, oh my god. Oh, the broken bird has been repaired. Fly away. Court Case Bird fly. Do you know with Kyle in Duret tonight little puppies?

They'll be happy for both of us! Say we are! Alright now gay person, don't forget to get the spinal fluid out of this one before you throw the incinerator in the back. Oh. So, um, she's running like some stem cell business out of air, okay? Well, you know what if she is and she's if she saves someone with with puppy stem cells then God bless so Ronnie, why do you keep licking your butt? I don't know

Ever since I was cured of that horrible disease of anteropron pets Yeah, I'm like the last year remember was going into sir and then all of a sudden I kind of blacked out and I woke up in a bath to a with ice and now I'm not even I just pee on the floor all the time. So I just want to pee on the couch so everybody knows it's mine. Okay, man. It's like a less thing I remember was Lisa Vanderpump singing a chair with a teacup and a spoon swirling it. I don't know what's going on anymore. So I'm not going to, I was like for a moment I was like, we could probably do a good Vanderpump rules get out situation, but no, we're not going to. Like all the way to her, so turns out I've just been hypnotized by Lisa. That's why she's always drinking the tea. She's like Oh my goodness.

So we don't go downstairs. There's mold. So, uh, do you think I know why you're such excuse all the time. So it's really where we had beautiful movies. We've put Christim inside of Bojoge. So, uh, it's like the worst. They get no positives. They do it all the right way. The brain transplant. He's like, I'm a model, okay? Sorry.

What is boy talking about that? Boy, just a comma, a million, seriously, seriously Seriously? Boy George is even later with his red thin usual, he's never paid it! Guys, I'm concerned, boy George wants to do a t-shirt line. Guys. Guys. This rotten entire paragraph's a count even fit on a page! P.K. is it true that boy George would have an Uber? Oh, my God. Is it true that boy George from haven't you but

Oh my god, oh, all right, okay, we'll get it together. We'll get together So now and Teddy your meeting for lunch and of course guys like American On our car wins. Yeah, she's like she's like how long have you been waiting here? You know, by the way Teddy has been proving to be a really good accountability coach because they are an out all reporting is like, they're like, I got to be on time for Teddy. It's like, it's not always on time. Yeah. So they're looking for clothes in a workout shop. They're not at lunch or to work out shop.

I know. I work at close shop, whatever you call them. Whatever they call. Kind of take the ugliest fucking thing in there. And she goes, these are cute. Only the fucking Kyle. It's like she can always laugh. She won't walk directly towards whatever got pirates leaves on it like They're like I'm sorry, ma'am. Um those are actually the curtains we use to mask the employees on the area. They're not pants I'll never eat ten. It's again to read get out of this

Get out of this, you know, okay. Ha ha ha ha. Get out of this fucking scene, lady. Seriously? Seriously? I'm so sad. He's like, hi, I'm Teddy. You know, this shit with To Read is like water torture. It's like something poking my eyes, you know? Like, I got excuses, but not an apology.

And like, you know what? I'm just not gonna bring it up again. I'm like, how about starting now? I'll start that right now. Yeah, that'd be great. How about now, exactly? Yeah. Yeah, but basically, she just based the establishing

that the Beach House trip is gonna be this episode. It never was basically coming except for Rina. And speaking of Rina, we then go over to Rina and Erika Jane, walking down the street, walking basically to a restaurant and Erica But it's oh, they're walking Hollywood. That's what is the walking Hollywood and Erica's a little exciting that those whole areas being redone At least it's like it is beyond exciting. Where are we again? Hi, hi, I'd love to read I just like trust me without

Oh, and when it's like when I moved here Yeah, I just love that minute just loves to agree off the bat and because she like her entire philosophy and work carries into her life You know say yes first and then figure out the details later. So it's like, it's like, wow, look at that pothole. It's like it reminds me of the pothole on the other tree. I know. I was thinking the same thing. Which pothole are you looking at?

What's tree, what's a pothole? Have I mentioned that I love black tie? I love black tie! Yeah, yeah, I could see. I love it. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh I love Black Tie! Yeah, yeah, I could say. Puzzle baby. Rynna's doing that thing where she's just listening every little thing that she does. It's like my sister and Carly, I'm sorry for

listening to this, but I always tease her because I'll be like, what are you doing today? Well, I went to the store and then I had to get bread and then I had to get milk and then I had to get vegetables. She lists like every step as if it's like a separate thing, you know, like so make a list of like every mighty thing. Kind of like me on the bonus episode whenever it's like,

so what'd you do Ben? I'm like, well, I went to the store. I'm like, I got bread. It cracks me up and that's what Rinna does. She's like, Here's what I'm doing. I'm doing days on Monday. I'm doing some middle, then I'm doing days on Monday. I'm doing some middle.

Then I'm doing days again. Then I'm looking at squids because there's so many squids. So many words, baby. And then my kids, oh my god, so many jobs. So many kids, kids are work. Motherhood's a work. That's the job, it's a career. I look like Ty.

And then the other... Oh, what happened to Erica? What happened to Erica? Did she just get infected by the alien? Well, I'm sorry, while you were talking, I was looking on the egg and it turns out it was not my ex-bend, it was nailing an egg and it kind of got on my face and went on my stomach and give her a hug. It was Benedict, anyway. But it's got all the straighter. As a Marica knows that. I know. They're giving Erika a lot of credit. So Erika's watching her.

She's walking around and pick tails with these little red, you know, little girl puppy things, which look of course she looks like the crazy old lady in the disco rouse, right? Yeah. He's just like trying to get her change who drives that pink car around. What's her name? And Celine. Yeah, and Celine. She's that lady, you know, I mean, not as old, but like she's that lady.

So of course the waiter is going to be like, hello, girls. She's like, oh, girls. Oh, aren't you cute? Come on, girls. Look, well, what is he's supposed to call you? Showed up here be like hello girl. She's like oh girls. Oh, aren't you cute? Call her. Girl. Look what is he's the best to call you? Show that here looking like baby Jane. Hello ladies who've seen Hollywood when it was a different kind of town. So hello lady who post Joan Crawford down the stairs.

I did not. It's a letter to daddy. Daddy taught that is. down the stingers. I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not.

I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not.

I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not. Chopopras and what do you laugh at over there? I'm a lazy, stay a case bad. It's for Frankenstein, not a case. So she basically had a talking bad hell on Chopopras.

There's not a lot of time for rehearsals. So I think this is when Eileen shows up and then it's like, hi, I'm back. I was just shitting over there and now I'm Someone's feeling good Monizuma's revenge turns out he's really vengeful year later, but I'm here. I'm back. Uh, oh, where we We're in secret revealed now, huh? Okay, well So Lisa Vanderpound's going to be showing up here to apologize. I'm assuming that's why I was called right a real apology No, oh That beast real apology. No, oh, that beast. That was beast.

He's anyway. Oh my god. So then we see we go over to Lisa Vanderbump who arrives at Pallyhouse in West Hollywood and she's there. She's free. This is I was like, what a treat for us that we get to relive the Teddy experience but with Lisa Vanderbump because Lisa gets there and de-recalls up and say, Lisa, Lisa, I'm in ridiculous traffic. I think it's gonna be probably about another five to 10 hours. I'm not sure. Oh, and Vanderfell's like,

you live right around the block from me darling. All right, it went through the same thing you'd granted. It was in the helicopter with Ryan Se secret. Overlooking the tiny little people. Wow, that piece licked again snooze. I forgot what we were talking about. Please get here, I hate waiting. So back at the other place, Eric is like, oh, cell poppers, huh? I've always wondered what it's like to play the same character for decades. I'm like really? Kids you've literally done it. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha hungry or never say Tired I can't even think of any simple words right now I'll be are we playing password because I did say yes to that. I would do super password. Okay expensive

Okay, I'm gonna say jewelry the answer's jewelry. No Okay, expensive. Okay, I'm gonna say jewelry, the answer's jewelry. No. Oh. So, Erica's like, you're not coming to the beach, cause you're working so much. Oh yeah. Days, then the middle, then days,

then Amelia's doing something, then Harry's there. He's a spin, that's a job being a wife. So, so, so, there's a husband. That's a job being a wife. So busy. There's a rat. Taking showers. So we can. So we can. Boom. Backed out on the table. Lack of oxygen to the brain. Hello. This is Lisa Rina. We have an ad coming up. So you better listen to it, baby.

Celebrity Beef, you never know if you're just going to end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife. And I'm Sydney Battle. And we're the host of Wonder e's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the build-up, why it happened, and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feuds say about us?

We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It's no-bought into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this esteemed jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon music or wonder ya

So then we go back over to banter pump and now it's like 30 minutes later We saw that we sit the clock winding up and at least it goes I'm going into Teddy mode right now Which I like that Teddy already has a mode and that's possible to go into it She's like, hi, I'm Teddy. It's like now. I'm getting more boring with every passing minute. So Kaelin to read coming together. And now 34 minutes, 34 minutes late.

Yes, watching that time was all areas to me. I love it. It's like the new 24. Yeah. So he walked in together and now Kael is wearing pirate puffy sleeves that Doreet wore last year or is it the other way around? I know. I don't know, I don't remember,

but I saw that sign fell short again. And I was like, yes, it never lays. So Doreet's like, Oh, okay, Mastemalee sir. Which means that she wasn't even really on her way when she said she was on her way. Doreet, you're such a bad fucking liar, a swear to guy. Exactly, and it wasn't an apology.

It was a, look, I'm not as bad as Kyle, you know? But the thing is though, that was Kyle late, because maybe Kyle said that she was gonna show up at that time, you know? The point is that Lisa was left alone in the Paley House, and you don't wanna be left alone at Paley House. No one wants to be left alone at Paley House. You feel like enough of a douchebag

being there with other people. Exactly. So they come in and she's like, well, I've been waiting here since Matt Locke got countered, I don't care. This case is not closed. And they're like, traffic traffic traffic, blue. Victor and Oliver are apologizing to me. I've just been waiting here 34 minutes and 22 seconds.

I am Teddy. Teddy mode. Anyway, I have something to announce. It's very serious. It's very personal to me. It's close to me. Let me put my lower lip out a little bit further. There we go. It's a nice little shelf for a fly to come sit down. I don on what I tell you this personal story. 10 is completely bugger free for the first time in 20 years. The court case has been dismissed. They're like, oh, cool. Let me say that again. The court case, the case that was in court, as court is a place of law, where you get sued in such. The case that was in there, and by case, I case I mean caught case not like a case that Perry Mason carries

Court case of the Perry Mason could try this and by tried him you try like a lawyer not try like you can try a case I've for the first time in his life what I'm trying to say is dismissed And they're like yeah great wonderful and girls like them Kyle's like, then, where are you crying? Well, maybe you haven't heard the good news. Remember, Kyle, when we were in Vanta Pets having a wacky time washing dogs, and I sat and for lonely stared out the window and said, yes, court cases do you take their toll? Do you remember that? No, not really. Well, the court case has been dismissed. Hurrah, hurrah, syskin, vajayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayay I know how you know.

Love a jelly. So then Kyle is like, that's great news. So Duret, what's going on with you and Teddy? And Duret goes, Dude, piss on my leg and tell me it's raining. ASS! Jump shooting because she handles court cases! And mine was thrown out like a hot case. You ever see a natural hot bench? Hot bench? Well guess what?

This bench is slightly cooler because there's one less court case on the bench. Oh great. Did you order guac or should I? So to reach... Yeah, so Kyle is like... So, um, like, this, so there's Teddy thing. Let's talk about that. And Dread's like, well, his whole glass thing is so ridiculous. I mean, it's ridiculous, guys.

It's absolutely ridiculous. I like when Kyle goes, yeah, you know, I'm so glad that court case is over because we don't need the negativity speaking of Teddy. Yeah, that's like she does. I think I did it was a Spoon. I knew there was an opera transition. So good. And she's like the glass thing. It's so ridiculous. We can really talk about it some more and Kyle's like, were you mad at me for chiming in And to read it's like Coil, Coil. You don't do that as a friend, okay? You don't speak up when I'm trying to tell you melon camp, okay?

Coil, Coil. And Kyle's like, well, I needed to speak up, because you guys didn't understand what each other were saying. It's like you needed a translator, and she's like, you're not a sped citizen. Right there. But my husband, no one's paying you to do this, and I put down the slim fast

card. You know, I think it's totally acceptable for Kyle to say it sounded like there were two languages being spoken because Doreet's accent is all over the map. Yeah, she's got like 20 to herself. She's like a whole Rosetta Stone library. So, um, so then Kyle's like, yeah, I was like, I agree, but like, you know, Lisa interjected and you had no problem with it. So like, you know, why did you have a problem with me doing it? Lisa's like, don't deflect onto me.

The lady who has no court cases, did you hear that last part by the way? Just because I have no one suing me. And Doreet's like, Kitschum didn't count. Y'all chummed in. It's like Doreet's like, Kitscham didn't have your Chomden. It's like Dereet's just heard the word Chimden. And she's just thrilled by it.

She's gonna save every two seconds. And Kyle's like, no, but like, you don't understand. Lisa was also chiming in and you didn't get mad at Dereet's like, I don't understand how this is super critical. I don't understand what's going on. Kyle's like, it was basically two against one and I felt bad and then at least it's like two against one. No, no, I wasn't against Teddy at all. You know, you must be mistaken.

My favorite song is to become one, not two against one. I have a good relationship with Teddy. A woman who understands horse isn't. Jobs. Don't bring me into this. I mean, I'm not as good of a horse rider as she is, but I have a good relationship with her. And I'm way richer darling. And to reach like, what car?

I feel like you don't even have a side. And girls like, I don't have a side. Like, who cares? Why would I have a side I see both sides Yeah, she's like I see both sides and it's annoying that you don't see the same thing to that you don't see the same thing to to Lisa Dree goes is it because I love her more than I love you Kyle is that what it is? I'm founder from so fun. Hey someone is It is. And Vanderpump's like, oh, finally, someone is heard. The news.

I like your transition there between the Doreet and Vanderpump. I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like,

I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I know I'm like, I Kyle I'm totally cute in Kyle I'm terribly getting Kyle Kyle I don't even want to talk about it because you're both coming at me. It's like You guys just like you decided to do this with me. You decided to do this to me and make me cry and lunch and pirates Leads like how they decided to do this to you. You were the one who brought it up, steep it.

I was totally kidding by the way, Kyle. Now I feel sick. I feel totally sick. No, sick! I just realized the man I'm married to. I feel sick. Does beke make me look slimmerimmer not to change the subject. Listen Kyle, if Lisa Vanderpump was going to manipulate your ass into doing something stupid, it would have been way better than this. Well, the thing is that Kyle, I don't think Kyle thinks Lisa is manipulating anything. She just doesn't understand why Lisa gets a free pass and it speaks to a larger issue that Kyle has, which is that Lisa and Doree suddenly seem to be much closer than she is

with Lisa and she's jealous and hurt by it. When Doree says, this is because she loves me more, it's a bitchy joke to make because it's truth and just moment and Kyle reads it exactly for what it is And she feels like shit, which is what the joke was designed to do so she's like I don't want to talk about it anymore Yeah, and then she gets that like quiver face that I would get Which you know because by the way I would do exactly what Kyle would say I don't want to talk about anymore and then like half-cry as I say it and then get embarrassed that I have cried You know I had my face in a glass of wine. Who's not fair?

It's not fair. It's like total Kyle. I mean, this whole thing becomes just such a beautiful, beautiful disaster. Thank you, Kelly Clarkson. Yeah, because Kyle's now, she's now crying and she's like, I was just explaining that all I was trying to do was play Devil's Advocate. Which point? My bander pumps like, I'm going.

I waited half an hour and I'm going, I waited half an hour on, I'm going. I'm out of here. Please sir! This is for BK. Good boy. Enough. Kyle's crying of a nonsense. That's nothing to do with me or my lack of a court case.

And Kyle's like, oh god, she's mad, you're mad, you're mad, you're not mad at me and I'm not. And then Vanderpump's like, oh God, she's mad because married I am a man, not her. And then random pumps like, I want to celebrate. I want to talk about it for at least two minutes. I've been click glasses and talk about how wonderful everything is with me, etc, etc. They chased her out. She's like, you hear her off camera. I'm not dealing with this bullshit girl. Like, why Lisa? Why? It's like, you say I purposely what the bugging's. And Doreet's like, please baby, please. Baby, baby, for me. Because it's because I broke Phoenix's head this morning.

At least it's all dramatic because they're like, why do you have to leave? And she gets all dramatic. She goes, because I'm fucking tired. At least it's all dramatic because they're like why do you have to leave and she gets all dramatic is Because I'm fucking tired I'm going home to my husband who'd rather spend more time with me than you would Glitter and so she goes off and their so their faces are so hilarious watching her drive off. They're like, oh, never! Shondin! Shondin!

That's how I feel. So now they're just happy that she's actually using a turn signal. So now Kyle and to retire back into the Paley House and now they've turned their issue into an anti-lice issue because now you know their Kyle is now mad because Lisa Vanderpump clearly did not care that Kyle was sitting there crying You know and so to read immediately turns on Lisa Vanderpump and I was like well, I'm terribly sorry, but that is not the behavior of an adult I feel like I don't have these issues. My three year old, whatever that one's name, Jagga, I think. I mean, she's missing a head, but you know how it goes.

And Carl's like, uh, that's your younger child, actually. Yeah. Whatever. I'm trying, trying, trying, and Carl. And she's so, uh, she's like, I feel nasty like I'm, I mean, I don't feel like I should feel like I'm in Kyle because she's eating on your husband. She's like, yes. So now they're getting ridiculous about all of this.

Yeah, I can't do it because this all goes to his shin with not getting attention from a parent and not being told, I love you. It's 100% TITKAL! And Kyle's like, Lisa never told me about her childhood. By the way, that kind of hurts my feelings. Yeah, oh, it hurts my feelings. Really, maybe because you were talking about your fucking childhood issues the whole time.

Kyle, it's like that scene in an airplane where the guy orders coffee or something and then the wife in her head, she goes, Bob never orders coffee at home. That's what like Kyle was doing essentially. And also you have to also you also have to mention that to read Throwsleets under the bus even before this thing about that she was never told I love you. She's like, well you know it's just that Lisa, well she's even told me that when I'm around other girls I don't pay attention to her. I think she gets a little jealous. I'm like, wow, I quickly they turn, huh? But then they show a whole montage of Dereet not paying any attention to Lisa van der Kumpen.

They're around other girls. Lisa's like Dereet! Like, adding her on the back and Dereet's like, I love her baby! So, yeah, so now Kyle is feeling extra sore because not only did Lisa not care that she was crying even though Kyle didn't care that Lisa just had like a huge success in the courtroom. But on top of that, she didn't even know that Lisa mom didn't say I love you as a child. Oh my god, and then it gets even better because she's like like, she never told me that. Like, clearly she has a different relationship with to read. Yeah. And then to read goes, well, it's not us related, baby. She had a Joule Rilan and didn't tell me I had a shoot.

How does that have anything to do with the shooting? I know, that was so, I love that. That like, that somehow to read equates like the, the withholding information of like, I'm not gonna tell my deepest personal secrets to my friend to oh yeah I forgot to tell you that this photo shoot that we're gonna be doing is more involved than you were anticipating you know I was like I didn't know she had a jewelry line I mean why am I the only one he puts labels on everything I mean I'm an American woman do you know that I

mean have you heard of the egg to say I was told to have eating fat burgers that's how I support well Dorita is a fucker because she's the whole reason why she mentioned the jewelry line thing. And she wanted a brag that she was invited to be a model in it and that she knew about it. And by the way, Lisa doesn't have a jewelry line. Lisa was, right? It wasn't that Lisa's, Lisa's like an editor

for some magazine they wanted. She's partner, she's partner with somebody because maybe she said, oh, that was, I saw almost it again. She says, that woman really does all the work. I just can't to pump something and take a percentage, darling.

Yeah, well, either way, I'm sure like in her millions of businesses, she doesn't feel like, oh, I've created a jewelry line. You think Vanderpump wouldn't have told your ass if she created like this huge line by herself. She was going to make a huge deal out of. Of course she would.

You would have been to five parties. Yeah, it's like, yeah, exactly. I'm sure she told you just in listen, just the way you'd turn the conversation away from her happy announcement to basically talk about your Teddy situation. It's like, I've got a friend who every time she comes over, she's like, oh my God, new table.

And I'm like, yeah, I got it. You've seen it like 10 times but Every time you go over you're like oh my god love the new table I'm like you've seen it every single time like some people are not just don't Don't want to pay attention to stuff so that's me your friend So to read like well, we've got to address it And cry out as well. She's not picking up our calls trust me I've been friends a lot longer than you have with Lisa Vanderpump. She's like,

Coco! There, a cow. Get chom chom chom chom chom go. I don't even know what that was, but I appreciated it. It's a dream-triming, Kyle. Oh, chime. You're chime-ing in. Question. They're Kyle.

I know what your favorite serial is. Look at chimes! Kyle, may I chime in for a second? Like how I use that word play? When you're with Mauricio, does he make you feel thinner or does he feel thinner? How does it go? I don't know. So now we go to... A gross dag of pain! That was being made, sir. as he feels in a house ago. I don't know.

So now we go to the thing. Phoenix is head. So Rina's kid Rina's with her kids. And she's like, Hey, isn't Phoenix the one who was in the helmet last season? Gosh, this poor kid. Yes, they broke her head. It's that's probably how she got there in the first place.

It's probably like the second damn Phoenix doll they broke in the head off of. They're going to go home and Phoenix is is gonna be holding her own head in her hands Like mommy. I don't know what happened. I don't know how you do the food you that you do That question I believe the babe with the power what power the power of voodoo who do you do? I'm lost in this labyrinth I've got a question. Why does nothing rhyme with fever? Several words do I I mean I can't be don't be ridiculous So now we go to Lisa Reneva

Beaver I suppose be this one clear you There you go, you want me here? Seaver, like growing pains. Seed a family. You give me seavers, that's what I say when I watch growing pains. Growing pains, that's what I your mother, please serve in a I'm going on days in the middle then days then you have to get your driving thing then you have to get your hair done Then we got to get your bed for college and she's like mom. I don't care about my bed Yeah, we got to get your bed and then some sheets and then a desk ruffle and some pillows I can't believe to memorize so many lines. Oh yeah baby.

Oh all the time. I remember I had the lines of scripts I'm not even in. I just considered myself a permanent swing. I was gonna be in call me by your name. I was gonna play I mean I'm a role. If you had to, you know if you broke us like there's something up. It's like hey baby come by your name baby. I'm a man baby and I want to kiss another man, baby, lady bird. Hey, I'm in Catholic school, baby. Hey, hey, hey,

what a wonderful. What? What? Did I snort it? I hate when I snort. Oh, no. Trying to stop snorting people. Hey, baby, hey, baby, look, I'm a mute and I fell in love with the sea creature shape of water baby Remember I said one to hey look. I'm signing. I'm signing. I'm signing. I love you monster. Hey that month I'm the shape of water Lisa Reno That's ridiculous Lisa Lisa Rene is always like Mike. I am just a normal mom. Okay Lisa Renee is always like Mike. I am just a normal mom, okay? Her daughter's like with my Tesla coming. I'm not ready for it Driving is freedom, okay

Yes, I don't want to drive I want to have a little more childhood, you know, and then Amelia's like Amelia's like yeah, like, when Delaya was like, yeah, she doesn't need to drive. She crashed my boat in Canada. I was like, okay, all right, enough. Enough. Enough. And scene, and scene, you know?

Yeah. Reminds like, she's not afraid of anything. She's a little baby hustler that one. Oh my gosh, she's a little fucker. Okay. She's like, I want the wrong side of the movie. I'm sorry. Oh, so yeah, okay, yeah, spot get passed. Now we had down to Dana point, which is unfortunately not a reference to Dana

Milke, which is too bad. But we are at Teddy's Beach House. And as soon as I see this house, I was like, these women are gonna freak out because the next houses are like a feet away and the little private beach area is like essentially next. Like you could basically, a stranger could come and touch the savaget bump. This is not gonna go well. Yes.

And in the bonus episode, I made some rando comment the other day about how pillows or whatever has elabeled, needs to just be clear. And this one did. Teddy is like fluffing pillows and one on the bed says beach. Like, okay, I know that is so. That's so funny. Yeah. A lot of people say I'm Teddy.

Beach house. She's like my dress is beach house on beach house way by ocean. We sit down here and check. I love potlocks. You're ruining it for everyone, Teddy. And one of those people who wants everyone to be happy, except anyone around me or myself. I don't think you can be an accountability coach and say you want to make people happy.

Because usually being held accountable means you're gonna be deeply unhappy about something. Like being in in time. We cut to Kyle speaking of accountability coach needs. Let's go over to Kyle's house with a little dog who's raping the big one. Yeah. Just like every week they catch Kyle's dog doing something horrible. You know, it's like peeing on a wall, raping something, eating a diamond, like whatever

it is. She's like, ignore, ignore. Yeah. She's like, the read is late shocker must be that LA traffic again hello security not in that situation I've been in up in a hotel and they told me the only way to get he to drop off me own leg Dree is there a remote next to you? Yes, all right press pause. Oh my god time is stopped. No, you're watching a DVD Kyle that makes so much more sense

I almost lost a leg! No! Alright, well, hopefully I'll get there soon if there's not too many of those adorable little cars! She's like that's the other DVD, okay? Oh, you're right, I'm a explainer! Kyle! Kyle!

I just got out of my car and started shooting everyone. I don't know what's wrong with me. I just punched a stranger! Alright, to read, stop playing Grand Theft Auto. Oh! It's so immersive, Kyle. You won't believe this nightmare, Limokah. This man doesn't know where he is. He doesn't know how to get there.

Kyle, we find out that she's literally yelling at a limo driver at the whole way. And in the backseat like, this limo driver at the whole way and in the back seat like this will even drive a one-inch Kyle, it's like literally the road has turned into a rainbow and we just drove off, we just drove off, oh my, Kyle would not believe it, a cloud came and saved us to read your playing Mario Kart. Haha It's so anyway So then anyway Kyle's like well to read like I mean it's overdickless because obviously the limo driver has Ways on or something so they're not lost just that to read has never seen like You know, she's just never been on sensible of our something

Like what are these buildings? I never see that one. That's a hotel, that's a sign-up, so down, Kyle. So, am I ever wondered, am I a newton? Or is Vittree? Like, stop looking out the window, okay, Dury, just stop. Just go to the right. And then Dury just hangs up. I can't say that. I can't say that.

You say it. Oh, just funny, because Kyle goes, that was a call, that was in a call fail, that was a call ended. So the commander-promp is meeting up with Erica. That was a call, that was an a call fail, that was a call ended. So the Shranderpump is meeting up with Erica. And Erica comes over to Vanderpump's. Yeah, she said, goodbye, dogs.

I'll be away for 24 hours. Snooks don't be depressed. Hanky and Panky set up a hard perimeter for me. 24, get it? Now who's this cute and wild peak I talk into with the most? So Eric Roshal was like, I didn't know you had turtles, and at least it was a hard thing. I thought turtles, swarms, kins, and know, and the rossios, they could catapelas. I have a swing, I have a swing in the backyard, only for catapelas.

Oh, well that's great. And then they're like, they're like, did you, I think it was a band of homestylists. Did you bring anything for the potluck? She's like, well I had a bottle of champagne, but I forgot. At least it's like, don't worry. I have a cake. It's bitty rossier's birthday cake, but I still have a cream. Don't tell her. I've sent over cases of Van der Pum bloody blower to drink. So don't worry about that, darling.

An arrogant... That's a good friend, because she is opening every bottle of like... Van der Pum, Rosie! Van der Pum, sangria. Van der Pum, du-lu do we do we do we do we do what do what do what do. It's like, geez Lisa. But you know, Erica and her interview, like when she said she didn't bring anything for the potlock, she's like, I love my general style that home, the one with the marshmallows on it.

And it's like, that's funny, you know, but this also highlights how out of touch you've become because like,lucks are pretty common And they're not like something like leftover from the 50s like it's pretty common that people like hey, let's do a potluck It's actually considered to be a pretty fun thing to do Well, I suppose that depends on what church you get to because I still see plenty of jello molds with marshmallows and I'm truss Sir, well, I guess no one has been watching bearfoot contest pot potlock episodes recently where her best gaze come over and they play cards afterwards. Well, you see Contessa's brought it back. That's a hipster.

Barefoot Contessa. So over a days of our lives, Lisa Rinna shows up, it's like, hi, hi wardrobe person. You veged, I kind of haven't, hi, hi. That's like a long kiss on a lips. He's like, girl, okay, she's like, the four days I was on that employment, I was in 19 Taco Bell commercials. How are you on unemployment with 19 Taco Bell commercials?

That's that's rich, okay? That's an actor's drink You're like flow from progressive insurance. I know. I know Yeah, that's actually really good. Rina She's saying oh my god, and then when I got days, I was gonna be like bobraini It was like the girl's Vogue moment. It's like no, it wasn't really wasn't I love you, but No, it wasn't really wasn't. I love you, but no, it wasn't. So Richard's like, I assume that we're going for a sleek and spy. She goes, yeah, sleek and spy. Sleek, spy sleek. Did you notice when they sat her down to do her make up, there was a wig,

they like showed a close-up of a short-haired wig. I did not notice that. That's funny. Shade and Buggers. So shady. So meanwhile back in somewhere in Beverly Hills or in Cino, wherever Kyle is, Doreet finally shows up. Just I want to cry right now, Kyle. It's the worst experience I've ever had in my life. I was like, girl, you were a shelter. You were a shelter shelter. There's a princess that went missing and this idiot couldn't find her. Then there were all these little mushrooms I suppose. We're supposed to just jump on them. Go!

Go! I mean one moment I was in a desert. Next thing you know I'm holding onto a tidal shell, swimming through water. I'm like what is this crazy place and And giant monster things throwing fireballs at me. And so I was like, grab the hammer, grab the hammer. I'm not equipped to do this. So I did anyway.

It falls in the lava, and after all, that they're like, the princesses in another castle. I'm like, what, Kyle? I don't care about the princess. I'm just looking for a flatbread in a path to Kyle's house. You know what I'm saying? Terrible. We're missing, good fever. She's walking around that fire castle.

Where's my stage? I thought I was going so fast. I was like, this limo drive is out of control. This blue little furry hedgehog. We're going around a loop to loop. So I'm like, he has to drive more safely hedgehog. He keeps driving upside down in general's cow. So cow and Dury, yeah.

Okay, so then Eric and Van, Vanterpump are in the car and Vanterpump's like, Oh, Erica, Jane, my little buddy, friend, let me brush your hair, sweet. She's like, I went to dinner and I said, last week was dropped. And she's like, oh, yeah, wow, great. She's, yes, and they dinner and I said, that I'll super-stroptum. She's like, oh yeah, wow, great. She's like, yes.

And they talked about a bunch of bullshit. She goes, oh yeah. Oh yeah, that's how they act. Look there. It hurt me. She's, oh, let me guess. You needed more. She's like, yes.

Look, yes. Yes, here we go. You're cool, Ted. It's a dream-passing in a limo. LAUGHTER She just likes shows, the tits. She's like, Checking what look at these, Erica! They have expensive, too!

So, it's like National Lampoon, right? So, um, so, so, so, anyway, so Lisa is talking about how Kyle was basically being self-absorbed and that this has been a problem for, for, for Vanderbump in the past and they show this flashback of a scene that I had either forgotten or never made on the air, but either way it's so much funnier in this context because Lisa's, Lisa's like, God, Ken's having a kidneys, just had a kidney stone.

It was one of the most terrible things in the world. It was like, blip blip blip. Sorry Lisa, my agent, hold on. Anyway, he wasn't such a pain. I was so vulnerable and made me think about my own more and I'm like, blip blip blip blip blip blip. I'm sorry, my agent's like, what's up girl? And I'm like, hey, you were saying.

Would you rather talk to your agent? Don't ask questions that you don't want answered. No, she would much rather hear about Ken's kidney stone. Listen, some of us are cheatering on the precipice of relevance. So when the agent calls, everything stops, okay? Yes, okay. We will both just get it from your table and leave.

I did it to Ronnie earlier, okay? Like, I don't even have an agent. If anybody's agent called me, I'd be like, bye, I gotta go. Like a rental agent, like, honestly, like, if Alamo called, it's like, excuse me Ronnie. So, Rinne calls, and Rinne calls on FaceTime. It's like, hello ladies, the middle day,

some middle day, some middle day, some driving class middle-tays, some middle-tays, and driving class at Bets. I'd buy in Bets for children. And Eric is like, Oh, you're missing out. Oh, listen to what LVB said. She was talking about her old ass husband doing something or something or other,

court case, whatever. And then the latest in care. But in that hilarious, like she totally felt like she was just being mocked or something. Oh. Rinn is not paying paying attention she's spending the entire time looking at herself on the face time camera she's like look at my makeup I look young it's like 1992 at least Rinna were you saying something anyway? Rinna looks like Billy Reader just Billy Reader Billy Reid looks at me. Which came first, they should come to the Billy Reid head. Am I right?

He reads bit through a lot. It should go. She's a first see, first see. She goes. Wow. Vanderpri than ever gets upset. It's a shame I can't go see your ever world shit Okay, gotta go by I'm auditioning for an alamo commercial did someone say something about alamo recently?

Oh the day that that man gave us the news and sage the ala wait, why is everybody talking about something else? Did you not hear my news about the Alamo? Ha ha ha ha! They forgot about the Alamo. Let them... let them suffer. So, um, Lisa and Erica arrive at the beach house and Lisa's like, How lovely! How lovely! what a lovely vestibule now where's the rest of the house oh this is it I see a pillow that says

below where isn't that poor person if you tell you are just like what of us and what of us I mean general human beings How American of you how American I mean I could never ride a horse like you Teddy but perhaps I could teach you a thing or do about pillow words Did you notice the Erica like oh Hi Teddy is a cake It's like you sneaky, bitch You just hand it for that cake like you brought it. I didn't notice it

Teddy is like I'm just gonna be Vanderbilt goes Google bye be do be do does it and she's like no, we bought it Hi, I'm Teddy look at the backyard. We've got chairs. I have cornhole and a friend of Prokos Can we love this? He's been trying to get in my home for years. Which way? The only one Now take off my hat looks too good on you get it off Erica get it off get it off I can't get it off get it off. Oh, that's much better. I Found you stealing my soul. Oh, thank God put it down on the To you tell it taking my entire spirit with that at

So Doree shows up and she's actually brought a lot of food because her mom's in town So her mom essentially is like I'm making food Which is the best part of when moms do that. And so... You become found flat to bread! You know you open up every container and PK is taking a bite out of every single thing. You know, you can. Quality shorts babe. So, you know, I was like, God, guys, I made lettuce wraps and egg rolls and I've also made... I've made, uh, what are those things? I went to Panda Express, okay, I went to Panda Express.

Okay, guys. It was terrible. It was terrible. It was a nightmare. No one knew how to do Kung Fu. It was the most terrible experience I've ever been to. M'laugh, Fander Express. Other side.

I said, give me one of each and let's get out of here. I was just terrible, terrible, ridiculous. So, she's like, she's like, how much are these houses? And Dread's like, they know to handbag Kyle. They don't have brass tanks. And she goes, why don't you walk in and just ask how much it is, which you know Dread's bringing bad up later.

Go, Montage, know how much it was. Yeah, I was like, I'll look it up online later. Hello, she's a no-bitch. Yeah, and Dorita's all proud of herself bringing that food, she's like, if that's not an olive branch, I don't know what it is. More like an olive forest for crying out loud. Oh, the fun. Get it, get it.

You get my joke. Grow with that, I've been a better word. Grow, grow with that. I don't know what that is. I don't know what that is. Oh, the beach. How gorgeous. The sea.

How gorgeous. That's just cute, too. Oh, that was me and me. I thought the beach how gorgeous the sea how gorgeous This is cute too Should I do the olive forest joke again? Should I? Should I? Oh, look at the land of course Olive Garden forest heaven plane That was so Lisa van Pompus still pretty salty about to reaping 30 minutes late, late for dinner. So, um, so she's telling Kyle and Kyle's like, Lisa, that's not what you're upset about.

It's like, Kyle, don't push your luck on this one, okay? Don't push your luck. And her pump really doesn't know how to just keep anything inside. She's like, oh, are you sure you're not late because you left late? I sat there waiting for half an hour, the other night, thirty four minutes. And Erica's like, I'm gonna drink this real slowly. And Kyle's like, oh, Jesus, here we go. And Dread's like, is that why you got up abruptly, Lister? At least it's like, I was talking about something that was huge for Ken and I and Kyle goes. So you storm off because of that.

I'm like well what part of huge did you not understand Kyle? It was huge and you ignored it. So yeah she stormed off. Yeah and Kyle's like yeah that's not it. You said that your husband would like to talk to you more than us. And she's like so I was brushed aside. And she's like, so I was brushed aside.

And Daddy's like, welcome to my beach house. Hey, if you guys seen my beach bill, it says beach. At least it's like, maybe I was drained. Maybe I was tired. Maybe I didn't want to sit there for 30 minutes. And Kyle goes, or maybe you didn't like it, wasn't about you for a moment. It's like, whoa, says Kyle, the one who made it about you instantly. She goes. I mean, they're both self-involved. What kind of thing? Because you were upset because we were having a moment, you can take it.

Okay, we both have pirate sleep shirts. The same one, Lisa. Okay, if Doreet were crying, would you have gotten up and left? And she goes, I don't know. She's like, it says so much about our relationship. And she wouldn't even care enough about me. And she wouldn't even care enough about me. And she wouldn't even care enough about me. And she wouldn't even care enough about me. And she wouldn't even care enough about me. And she wouldn't even care enough about me relationship and she wouldn't even care enough about me to say it and see what I'm all about.

I just- I just don't want to talk about it anymore. Look what I did, I appropriated what you did. Where's my one glass that I can cry and do like a baby? I don't want to talk about it anymore. And cause like, you brought it up. I don't want to talk about it anymore. And then cry, I was like, who brought the food?

I'm taking it into my bedroom. Dipping sauces. Oh I counted how many pita bags you just took to your room. Don't mess up. You're gonna be held accountable for that. I'm Teddy I'm Teddy So let's see so Erica is talking about her periods for some reason she's like oh my period Here's the worst here's like a faucet You turn them on and lots of blood comes out. There's lots of it. You have to keep waving your hand under it and it keeps coming out.

You're like, wait a second. I've got these things for time. And you're like psychosematically. I'm starting to feel your pain. I'm like, Ergis, like shut the fuck up, man. You don't know what the fuck I'm feeling right now. Get out of here. Don't try to take my pain away from me.

By the way, I just want to point out that like with... That's part of what psychosomatic means, is it? Psychosomatic means that like if someone's talking about feeling sick... You give it a little bit. Well, yeah, actually, uh... It means you make yourself sick. Right, basically. But usually it happens by the power of suggestion.

Um, so yeah, it's perhaps a, uh, not the best use of that word. But, um, I just want to point out that when Kyle stomped off to her bedroom, she's like, I'm not going to give Lisa an apology. I know she wants an apology, but I'm not going to give her one. If anyone, like I'm going to, I should be getting an apology from Lisa, and it's not going to happen. I know it right now. I'm like, do you realize that you're both being idiots? You're both expecting an apology, and you're both unwilling to give an apology? How about you both apologize for just basically not listening to each other?

Yes. But I do like it because then when she does get the apology, it's a Vanderpump apology. It's like, well, okay, then I'm sorry. But you have to be sorry to. All right, the ends. Yeah, you know, that would have lasted like five island seasons. Exactly. No, I don't know if I felt it. I felt a little weird, you know, like, give it to me. I felt so weird, I felt so dismissed because I was like, feeling something and I don't know,

oh, I lean, I didn't know you're so sensitive. Okay, I'm sorry. Remember the time you said you were sorry, but you said I was really sensitive. I don't know, I felt sort of like, it keeps me, a little it keep. So, meanwhile, so Kyle and, Kyle and Ted, you're out on the beach later on

and it was like chatting and Kyle's still mad. But guess what, Sunshine has arrived late in the afternoon. Hi girls and why? And why? Oh my god, whoa, it's amazing. Wow, and then she's like tripping over the sand. So come y'all. Like I fall people.

Oh yeah, I'm. Wow. She's like a pie on the way out. Oh, yeah, I'm I And Vanderpump's like well hello awkward dancing lady on poles. How are you doing and crowd's like well? I hope you have fun here because it's not very peaceful Something happened I broke off me next to see Lisa's like well, God won't give me a comfortable I don't run next chair. So to sit on this less comfortable chair

Come here goes look at this light girls. I want to get your picture. She takes a picture of Lisa and crowd, and they both look at the camera like, ooh, they're pissed. She's like, ah, that was pretty. Do you think, could we get Marisa on the phone to explain what happened while I was away? Marisa, yeah, I'm here.

So like, here's what's going to happen. Like, batter pump was heard because like, yeah, I'm here. So like, here's what's gonna happen, you know, like, better bubbles heard because like, you know, she went through a court case or something and then like, she didn't get sued, but like, nobody cared because like, really cares, you know, so it's like you're not getting sued. What do you want to party? You know? So then I'll start a crying, but I told her, you know, we're gonna grind a pirate's shirt cuz pirates never win And that's basically what happens. Yeah, amazing So then they get into it again. She's like I was just frustrated Camille I'm in a wooden chair and it hurts me bum and Kind of said I brought it with the reach for what?

To be late, I didn't know. I was like, you don't even care about me. Oh, you're about to clear the mood. And everything goes. What could I say? We're petty. Petty, that's how's my tagline. Petty, what is it?

Petty glamos, petty, chic, petty. What it was, my damn tagline again. Petty. Petty ugly, ugly, Pettighe, Sheik, Pettig- What is Motham tag a lot of him? Pettig. Pettigly, ugly Pettig, ugly Pettig- What is- what is your thing? What is it? The Pettigly? Yuck, pretty Pettig.

What is it, Laurie Pettig? Laurie Pettig, she wishes. Although she does have Laurie Pettig's kind of attitude. Right. Laurie's got her Pettig. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, she's got the petty. Yeah, she's got it in there where she's like, this is sex. It's just like Laurie Petty with a lot of makeup and wigs, you know, and pussy songs.

Yeah, I don't remember. I'm trying to look it up. The petty mess. That's what it is. The petty mess. That's what I love. Pretty mess. The pretty mess, sir.

The petty mess. That's the pretty mess. The pretty mess styling. Well, I can also. Not the petty coatty mess. Was the pretty mess? The pretty mess styling. Not that Petty coat junction mess. So they are basically fighting over like who's a better friend or whatever. And she's like, Kyle, I don't favor Doredo for you, but I favor you both over Max. Doesn't that count for something darling?

You're still a runner. Isn't that count for something darling you still a rumour isn't that hilarious I'm sorry. I made you feel like a runt Kyle But what can I say I like him which it's more oh I said it When I gave you that pillow that said life isn't always great, but at least you're not Kim I meant it Kyle Take note take notes Teddy on the pillow front by the way. So Lisa's like, I just want an apology. So basically, Kyle wants an apology from Lisa

because Lisa made Kyle feel like to read was more special. And Lisa's like, fine, I'm sorry about that, but I want an apology for saying that I plotted against Teddy. I did not plot at all. I'm not a blotter! Don't! Don't say that! She's like, okay, I'm sorry. Yeah, she's like, well, I gotta, she's like, surprise! I mean, she's not being honest about her apology, but I'll take it! And that was pretty much it.

She's like, you're hard on me sometimes, Vanderpump, and she's like, oh, I'm not crying. Bye, I made up in the past! And then she steals her seat. Second she goes inside, like a classic housewise petty fight part two. Yeah, exactly. I was a little surprised.

I thought this was going to just spiral into some super petty drama that was going to just get bigger and bigger, bigger over the entire season, but it seems almost like they patch things up a little bit, which is almost oh well to reat We'll try don't you worry yeah Turn me one time she don't call runs with What is she me by that when I'm by but you tell you that. Don't worry, Doree is there to make it worse and worse. Oh, I'm exhausted for it.

I'm very exhausted. Me too. Let's wrap her up, Dean. Well, you guys, we don't have a listener spotlight this week, so apologies for the it, but if you're doing the listener spotlight thing and we've missed you you be sure to email us and For everyone we'll be back tomorrow to talk

Summer house I always get I always forget that we're talking summer house tomorrow, and then I always get excited Carl Carl Carl so Summer house summer house summer house summer house summer house. See you guys We'll talk to you tomorrow go to watch forwrapers.com to buy your live show live show tickets because we always have a fun time live and we want you to be part of that. So go there and we'll talk to you tomorrow. Bye. Bye everybody. Hey, prime members. You can listen to Watcher Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today.

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