Watch What Crappens - RHOBH: Haunted (You Stole My Goddamn) House

Episode Date: May 29, 2019

Kyle throws a thirtieth birthday party for her kid on Halloween. Will Kim haunt the place until she gets back her goddamn house? To hear this week's bonus episode catching up with RHOP, Project Runway, What/If, and other fun shows, and to find Crappens on Demand video recaps, become a member over at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. ***New Limited Edition Shirts! "Martini Medicine" and "Team LVP" merch available at crappensmerch.com! **Crappens Live is coming to Milwaukee, Pittsburgh, Minneapolis, Baltimore, Nashville, Indianapolis, and NYC! Find ticket links at watchwhatcrappens.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Of the real housewares of kitchen eyes land. Hi, Ben! Hey, what's going on? Momma. Well, that's good. We have an exciting news. In case you missed it this Friday, we have tickets going on sale for two new crappin' shows. We are going to Indianapolis in November,

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So today we are talking about the super exciting world of real house wasn't Beverly Hills One of one of our listeners was like guys you guys are so negative and Beverly Hills Ow, Spevdly Hills has hurt me to the core! One of our listeners was like, guys, you guys are so negative and Beverly Hills, you're sucking the fun out of it. Listen, we are only negative because we care. Because we care. And also, I still enjoy the show. I just, you know, I just want the women to like kick it up a gear. Come on now. I know, I read that and I was like negative. I feel like I've been very positive I actually think we've been we've been more positive than most of the people watching the show Yeah, but whatever you know, we save it with thinking sometimes it's not pleasant Yes, it's called tough love tough love. Okay. How do you think Kim Richards got to where she is?

Okay tough love well speaking of I was very excited about this episode I didn't know Kim was gonna be on this week, but watching the previously is when they're like, oh my god, there's Kim in the restaurant. Hi Kim, how are ya Kim? How are ya? And then Kim's hiding her face from Lisa Rinne behind the menu.

Hiding behind any objects she can find. Yeah, then I knew it's the Kim episode and I was very very excited for it. Okay, the kids would say I'm here for it. I've missed you Kim Richards. Yes. The Kim Richards got on our damn nerves too towards the end there because it was just so much like blaming everybody else for everything. But God, I've really missed him, you know. It's you.

Sometimes you don't really realize what you have until it's gone. Come back, so I'll be back. Come back, King of Kim Richards. I've really missed Kim, you know, it's you don't really realize what you have until it's gone Come back King Kim Richards so the episode opens up in Hawaii We're still in Hawaii at the day after the wedding. I don't know why we're still in Hawaii, but we just are and So the women are like walking out to like a little brunch like a day after brunch that's outside and Kyle's like my voice sounds ridiculous I'm like really Kyle stealing another storyline like my voice sounds ridiculous. I'm like really Kyle stealing another storyline. Carl, don't you have something that you can be terrified of today?

You're gonna really go with this. Yeah, Kyle tells us. She's like, I can't afford to get sick. I don't have the luxury of taking a few days off because as soon as I get home, I have to get ready for Farrah's 30th birthday. I'm like, bitch, you have to like check your privilege. I hate being the person that I hate saying that.

It's so annoying, but like you do, because like, you know you have to like check your privilege. I hate being the person that I hate saying that. It's so annoying. But like, you do, because like, you know, most people would say, I don't have the luxury to take a few days off because as soon as I get home, I have to go to work. She's like, as soon as I get home, I have to like stand next to Glenn while he tells me where he's gonna put a Ferris wheel.

Come on Kyle. Yeah, I drop a hundred grand on a party and wear a playboy uniform. Tough life, Kyle. Yeah, I drop a hundred grand on a party and wear a playboy uniform. Yeah, tough life Kyle. Don't say you don't have the luxury to do something as you explicitly plan a super luxury event. Yeah, and then Doreet comes in and she's like, oh, Fitton! Oh, it's been such a journey. What time did you let it start? That's not and then Kav we see a clip of them like raging and parting and it was eight 44 p.m

Yeah, well look like island time. Am I right? You know those I really Teddy time Teddy time It's Teddy time. It's Teddy time Everybody's falling asleep because I keep repeating the same thing over and over again. Um, Teddy time. So, um, Mauricio joins the group and, uh, of course, he's wearing the agency t-shirt. I mean, he does not for one second.

Does he let up? Although now Teddy's gone into it because she's wearing her like the skyline, whatever. The security thing is she's wearing that hat. I mean, these people are so shameless. Like, they, they're going to voice their brands on us, but then they're not going to like voice any drama. Yeah. And, and also they're mixing up their brands, because standing next together, it's like

skyline agency, you know, so people are looking bad at it. So, you know, he bless you to whoever owns the skyline agency, because you're making tons of money right now So then Camille joins with her two friends and she's like Hello, Maria's just like to the new bride. I was like expecting Camille to be like Fucking Camille So crazy waking up at the message again. I don't know. Meanwhile, there are usmins already out of the picture. He's already like, bye, I'm going to go like surf board.

Yeah, I'll be golfing. Have a happy afternoon day. And where are they going for their honeymoon? They're going to Switzerland because it's David's favorite place. I'm like, okay, so we see, we see where's the pantsman's relationship. Yeah. And so I'm looking here. Oh, I just wrote more rejoins in Rynas'

Hello! What are you skydiving? She has to make up for her like day and a half where she didn't have a voice. She could put as much voice into everything she can. So they all meet up to have a girls' branch. Girls' branch. And Kyle, of course, starts up by saying, what Kyle always does.

She starts every conversation with an LVP. Yeah, an LVP tattletail. So then she tells that wacky story again. She says, oh my god, you guys, you will not believe what happened, okay? So my friend got robbed so her daughter is at an ice cream social and then they made the construction workers take a subway and then they all got up the subway and walked around the ghost door downtown and then the story is not

more believable just because you say it twice yeah it really is not. So yeah, so she tells you says how Lisa is getting a polygraph and they're all like Oh my god, I can be like that's ridiculous over a dog. That's crazy And they're like yeah, like I mean, it's crazy all this over a dog I'm like you're the ones who got nuts over the dog You're like don't act like Lisa like you guys have just been like having idle chatter about this dog. And that Lisa like went, blew everything out of proportion and got a polygraph. No, you guys sat a table after table, lunch, breakfast, dinner, whatever, and complained

about Lisa. And now she is this big conspiracy to take down to reach and that and that and that. And like, but now it's Lisa who's the one who's like over the top. Yeah, the saying about a dog is about five crazy bitches, okay? Yeah, I mean it is over the top at least is getting a polygraph and of course really ridiculous. It's like a John says a special but don't act like you guys haven't been crazy to. Yeah, and Teddy's like oh, did she reach out to you about your wedding? I'm telling you on your wedding day. On your wedding day.

Teddy, find something else to be fucking offended about. You know, why don't you go to Yelp and read your husband's business reviews, okay? If you want to be angry about something, do that. So Lisa did not text her call Camille on her wedding day, which is a little, it is a little weird. But then apparently she tweeted something that said. She sent a gift, she had her over and said, she's sorry, she couldn't come up. Blah, blah, blah, what the fuck do you want But then apparently she tweeted something that said

Yeah, so Lisa but But on Camille's wedding day Lisa tweeted now onto more important stuff Dodgers or something like that which to me is like a totally benign tweet and came out like yeah that was a little howie I wish she was here so the hurtful howie howie like howie howie howie howie howie man tell my right but it's funny that they're accusing Lisa of dodging them and she's tweeting about the dodgers yeah everyone is like see I said it was shady. You know, she doesn't have to behave that way. She doesn't have to behave that way. You guys.

Lila. Yeah. It's a little. Lila. We, you know, she should have been here for me to dismiss all this. And Brynn is like, okay, we talked about Vanderpimp. I'm done here. Bye.

Gotta go. That's all you have people. That's all any of you have. Get a better story. Yeah. So they all go back to Los Angeles. And now it's like the traditional beginning of the episode montage of what everyone's doing in over at Genesis House. Lisa Rina and Harry Hamlin have sent a piece of Aaron a wedding gift gift from Casamigos that says cheers to many happy endings Get it So I'm guessing she's part owner of this Casamigos. I thought I thought she's just friends with Cindy Crawford and Cindy Crawford and her husband

Or just part owners. I'm not really sure but she's always she's always plugging that Casamigos It's like who Rena or Denise Rina she's always playing cost of me goes so yeah she brings them that and Aaron's like wait a minute did you tell them about that and she's like yeah sorry baby you know me what we're gonna talk about I talked about your dick for about 20 minutes and I ran a step to talk about yeah he's like it was honestly that hand job was like the most awkward thing I had ever done, baby. It was so strange for me.

I really didn't know what to do. I mean, while Eloise is just sitting there like, oh my god. I know. I know. Denise is like, you better close your eyes and close your ears. Alright, about a hand job. So Erin is not like that hand job was from a hundred year old woman, I write. He's like, she was like 200 years old and

Matt's over in the corner crying like how could they talk about you like this So so meanwhile, oh, yeah, so other people are packing up it from Hawaii and oh, you know, I jumped the gun It was not everyone they haven't got they haven't Hawaii yet. Far be it for me to say that. We just really went to Denise's house. Because now we're back in Hawaii. And they're in the van headed to the airport. And Rinna's like, how are you? Everyone in the cast.

Did you see the article from People magazine? Did you read it? And there was an article where Camille was... It was an article about Camille and Lisa Vanderpom and how Lisa's not going to the wedding and how Lisa's just like, had a tough year and Camille was like, listen, I respect Lisa and her decision. And now the women are all mad that Camille was saying at brunch

that she was so hurt by Lisa Vanderpump not being there and yet in an article she's like, oh, I respect your decision. I don't know what to say. Well, of course, Camille is wishy washy in two-faced. We all know that. So it's not like they're wrong. But she didn't bring that up at brunch. They bring it up every fucking chance they can get and pester with questions until she

answers how they want her to. And then they get mad that she's not mad at the same people they are. I mean, they're so obviously, they're just so obvious and it's so boring because my my thought was at the beginning of this scene. Okay, they've already talked about Vanderpump. Now what are they gonna talk about on this long van ride to the airport? And here it is first thing out of their mouth is fucking article and D eat it's like I'm a big show trena I just couldn't believe it okay why do they care so much and also like you know they all are like oh Camille is so too faced they've all been in conversations where Camille has said like shady things about someone else and if they all still go and hang out with her so like and they all say she's

about everybody out exactly I'm Rin is well, I don't care if she loves Lee Savannah, pump. I mean, that's great. But you say one thing and then you say another thing. I don't trust somebody who talks out of both sides of their mouth. Do you not remember like telling everybody that Kim's on death's door and then pretending that you didn't have any idea that you said that? Yes. Hello. It was like, what was it last year, two years ago? Can we break? Yeah. So Rina is like now, man. She's like, uh, Camille needs to own her shit now.

Own it, baby. And if she's talking behind anyone's back, she needs to step up until everybody. Wait, since when did this roll coming through? Because that's what Rina and I think little that's what really does she holds it She holds it inside until she's ready to go crazy and then she releases and this is really just messing all over the place And I for one loved it. I mean, I love it. That's what that's what rid is like best at it just being so messy But I just think it's so funny like Five minutes from leaving this woman's wedding, they read one article in People magazine,

and they just immediately turn on her and just like enraged. Well, I mean, like, talk about two faces, right? I mean, that's just like, I mean, Camille is no saint, but these women, gosh. I mean, they even joke about it. They're like, okay, thanks for inviting us to your wedding. Now we hate you, you know?

Yeah. And she's like, and I't want to tell you girls I didn't want to tell you but of course she's been saying for example you to read you to read treats like oh when was this it's like well I didn't want to tell you is before that 50th birthday party. We see a clip of Camille being like, you know, that's a read like, I just, I don't get it like, does she have the money she has? Is that really her name? It's picking her life because he feels really cold. She's vampire. Do you like Fritos? I'm like, it's I got to fucking come here.

I got to fucking come here. And Rinne has been holding onto this shit, you know? So she tells her this stuff. And she reads like this after the Bahamas, when she told me it's really great to know let's be friends up there for what a beach. And meanwhile, Mauricio is sitting there in the van and he is so bored

He's just like looking at his phone playing doodle jump. He's like a Yeah, go to the ladies again, you know, I just like talking about this stuff. Okay. What am I gonna drop off to in five minutes? The things I do for free agency advertising am I right? Yeah, and then Teddy's like um Hi, I'm Teddy and you know what she should've just told us like just so you know I released this quote She should've done that like she doesn't have to do that because you guys are being so ridiculous She she left I totally like

Perfectly fine quote because all you bitches if anyone called you up from people magazine and said hey What do you think about this? You all would have said like I respect her decision You all would have taken the high row because you don't wanna be messing in a magazine. But here at Camille's doing the same thing, and now you're all mad like, oh, she should have told us that she said she respected the decision. You guys are just like assigning so much weight

to the stupid people magazine article about what Camille thinks about Lisa Vancomme not going to a wedding. Yeah. Teddy is also laying down her rules, right? Because she's, Teddy's very careful in everything she says to lay down the rules of why she's not fucking guilty for getting all of this going

and plotting behind everybody's back with Blizzard to release all this shit in the first place. She's not to blame because she admitted it. You know, that's her thing. Like she's not to blame for anything even though this whole storyline is Teddy's. Everything that was done was Teddy's. There's never been any proof that anybody else told Blizzard to say anything, okay?

Yeah. This, all the proof we have points to Teddy's. So now she's laying it down so she didn't do anything wrong. It's like, well, if she just told us about the article, then it wouldn't be bad. It's like confession, you know? Like what are you, like fucking father of ronch is a Popeau over there. Like just confess it. That's like all fine.

But it's also like, you don't like have to share every single detail about like what, like it's like, oh, guess what? I also picked some lint out of my navel. You know, it's like, it's like, I just don't, I think they're all talking to press so much. I don't, I just, I think that Camille didn't even really remember. She probably just was like, oh, yeah, no, like she just said some bullshit thing. You know, like, I just just I also think it's possible It's I think it's also possible to be hurt and also to say you can respect someone's decision

But you can also be hurt by it, you know, well, that's what this show does They all get mad at whoever's not mad at the people that they're supposed to be mad at I mean that's Kyle's M.O Remember last year Kyle was so mad because Lisa Vanderpump wouldn't get mad at Doree Everything's that Kyle said that she should be yeah, I mean that wasO. Remember last year, Kyle was so mad because Lisa Vanderpump wouldn't get mad at Daryl. Everythings that Kyle said that she should be mad. I mean, that was a whole fight last year. It's like, why aren't you mad at Daryl? Yeah.

It's like, children. Although, rubber face children, okay? The rubber face children within plants. So, speaking of Daryl, now we go back to Los Angeles and we just see PK sitting in a room, eating chips. He's just sitting there going transitioning from diabetes to to diabetes one by eating chips. Yeah, he's like diabetes 16 by now, you know. He's like out of the bag and say, oh, I'm just having a few. I literally just picked them up, babe. It's like a giant pile. There's like, there's basically like, there's like a stack of Pringles cans behind him, like a little pyramid that he's built.

Yeah, he's like, blah, blah. I'm just having a few, babe. They're so good. I just love him. Love him. Not love PK, you know. His hands are fully orange from all the cheetos. Oh, God. Speaking of orange, Dereet says this thing, I hate that skinny people say to bigger people. If you want too much, much wrong, some carrots. Hey, why don't you mention my butt? What if that's not the same thing?

It's not the same thing. I hate that. Let's not pretend that carrots are just like chips. No, they're not. They're not. There's a reason it's called no pain no gain because it fucking hurts. Do you understand? So then over at Teddy's house, Edwin is like sitting on like their outdoor furniture and he's like, hey babe, no one's baptized this deck yet. so how about we baptize it? I'm like baptizes, does that mean like peeing on it or something?

Like, yeah. Baptized this deck means that you get like washed in the Lord, okay? He's talking about fucking it. Yeah, that's really nice. And then Teddy's like, yeah, just be sexually free, Teddy. Fuckin' my husband a lot. Just because we did it this morning doesn't mean you get to be wrapped up all day.

And then we go over to Erica's house and she's talking with Tom and she's like, so I don't give a fuck about this news, which is that Kyle's having a party. And Tom's like, cool. You want to go to the party, Tom, do you want to go? And he's like, uh, is the train coming soon? All right, Tom, you're right there, Tom.

Suck wiping his face with the map. Get the port Tom just looks so confused. He's like, sorry, I have to go to Brockovich Khan, which is a new convention that I'm starting that very day at the same time as Kyle's party. And America's like, oh yeah, I'm talking about doing okay, then I'll just sell Kyle you then buy a good little bottle. Whenever she talks to Tom, it's like she's working in an old folks house. I'm just expecting her to be carrying a bed panoraz.

She just talks to him like he's either two years old or 5,000 years old. So then we go over to Rina's house where Kyle is getting Rina because they're gonna go get some mammograms and Kyle's talking about how she's gone to get mammograms with Faye before and these Savannah pop and Rina's like okay I normally do them alone but I guess I'll do it on camera with you because I guess that's what I have to do now So they run out of band of pump things to talk about I like how when Carl comes up She's like, oh my god, Rina's like hello And I was like, oh, I love this little knocker. She's like that knocker. It's a great knocker

It's a good. I was like is this gonna be another scene of them? Like, God, I love this street. I know. There's like a lot of stuff on Beverly Hills where they just like, talk about things that they like. A knocker. Yeah, knockers. I had to get it in there, sorry. A knocker and a ghost.

I'm not going on this scene, yeah. Ha, ha, ha. A knocker. So they're heading over to get the mammograms and cows like, oh, I am so busy planning Ferris Birthday Party. Oh my God, I got it busy planning Ferris birthday party. Oh my God, I got it ordered food. I got to try to find the DJ, got to find the valet,

got to get a Ferris wheel. I'm like, but you're not doing any of this stuff, okay? I know. I know. I know, we actually get to see Glenn. We see a flashback of Glenn standing with Kyle. He's like, okay, so I found the food, I got the DJ, got a valet for you, the Ferrisris was gonna go there. She's like okay

It's so stressful And Carl tells us this party cost 15 Birken bags, which is crazy So then get a Carvelle cake. How about that get a cake from Carvelle? How about Fudgey the whale? Fudgey the whale and a few candles and a few full-douchers. How about Ferris 30? She's old enough to take her friends to dinner and pay for it. How about that? Okay.

Okay. Yeah, it's called Daven Busters. Rinna, it's like, isn't this crazy? Do you even remember when you were pregnant with your baby? And Carl's like, yeah, I mean, this is crazy because I didn't even know that you had to do blood tests and stuff.

And so I went in and I started crying and freaking out. And the nurse told me to get over it. It's like, sounds like a great nurse, which is why she's still her nurse. I wish she was in this cast. The nurse is probably Kathy Hilton. Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, So now they start talking about the people magazine thing and I was like I probably will be reactive, but you know what I read that article I was like I just had enough I had a note also We need a new storyline, so I thought why not let's give it a try yeah

Let's restart yapping again Wasn't the show better when to read cared about glasses. I mean come on So next up doctor there at the doctor So now here's something, I mean, there's nothing inherently funny about mammograms, but I thought this was something that was funny in the scene because they get there. And it's just supposed to be, Rin is the only one who's supposed to be getting a mammogram.

College is there for support. But I think that Rinna did not want to do this, but she's like, fine, I'll do this. And she's like, oh, it's only me. No, it's not going to be only me. So they get there. And the lady's like, okay, I'll do this. And she's like, oh, it's only me. No, it's not gonna be only me. So they get there. And the lady is like, okay, is there an appointment for, is there an appointment for one or two of you?

Everyone is like, oh, it's just me, but hey Kyle, what did you do one, two? And Kyle's face, I don't know if you noticed this, Ronnie. Her face, she was like, she was like sort of smiling, like I'm in a scene. And then her face went from smiling to like, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh. It was like, yeah, it's so awkward. Because she to like, up, up, up, up. It was like, because she was like, she didn't want,

I mean, what was going through her mind was probably like my daughter's birthday party tonight and I forget bad news, this will ruin everything. I don't wanna do it tonight, but I don't wanna be on national TV saying that I'm too scared to do a mammogram. So she was like, add, watching her scrim in that moment was so hilarious to me because she was like

not ready this is not what she's playing to film today and she's like fuck oh it was amazing i recommend everyone go back and watch that i like to read his doctor voice because normally she walks into a room like this hi how are you but when she's at the doctor says she went hi how are you Doctor says she went, Hi, how are you? Hello. And the lady is like, hello. Hi. Oh, neat. So now they're going to get their mammograms.

And Rhinis is totally fine, everything. And Kyle is nervous, which I totally get, by the way, I totally get why her face was dropping. I'm not making fun of the fact that she's nervous. I'm just thinking it's hilarious that she was caught off guard. So Kyle does the mammogram and they basically are like, hey, we want to take a few more shots and she's like, oh, something wrong, something wrong, which obviously would make, I would be like a mess too. I think like it would have been better if like the doctors had been like, hey, we need to take some more shots

because it was blurry and we wanna get a clearer picture instead of saying, hmm, there's just something we just don't know what that is. I think we wanna take another look. I mean, the bedside manner, I was like, oh, yeah. I know they're like, oh my God, Kyle, get in here. We just saw it, it's like, what, what? Oh, just need to take another paper they're like we we we we

were looking at the mammogram and we can't be sure but does it say the agency in there we see one of those weird paper clips that's shaped like an A you know what we're talking about so she the Kyle is now like she she's going nuts. And this is actually a super sad story because Kyle, when Kyle's mom found the love, Kyle's mom never got mammograms. And so when she found her lamp, Kyle was turning 30.

And now Farah is turning 30 and they see something on her test so she starts freaking out, you know. Yeah, understandably. Yeah, yeah, totally. And then the doctor was like, sorry, so it turned out, you just have really crazy boobs. Like you had one boob,

and then you had a boob calling it self-alien too. It was really weird. Basically, we just took all of her money and investments, and we flushed it down the toilet. And now it's just your boobs again. And so then so now Kyle of course is fine, which we're always, we have as much of a gift shit about Kyle, you know, like, very happy.

She's fine. I mean, my God. Yeah. And but Rina, she totally, I loved Rina's like post-mama-gram comforting voice. She's like, oh, are you okay? Oh, poor you. Oh, Kyle, oh, are you okay? Oh, poor you. Oh, Kyle, oh, do you want to hug? You want to cry, son? You want to talk about at least a

Vanderpumpo that makes you feel better? So did Lisa Vanderpump text you while you thought you were going to die? No, she didn't. That's not nice of her. Not good of her. By the way, I'm by the way, I wasn't Beverly Hills this weekend and I totally saw what I'm that that stupid What's it called the Vanderholm or vendor whatever? It's tile stupid go kart thing someone was driving that and Beverly Hills Stupid person Want to run them off the road. Oh, I wanted to Well, I can't do that because I write a best bet. I'm already like a freaking dog on that tiny little bike.

But you didn't spend like a hundred thousand dollars for a stupid little thing and then complain when it doesn't hold the groceries. So have you ever seen me with groceries? No, my best bet. No. I assume it's all in the picture. It's pretty funny. I Was a picture I don't know if in this in your car investment, but your last bike you just have like a little like milk carton on the back of it Which is really cute. Yeah, and I just stack everything really really high and like bungee corded on It's really super safe guys

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So now it's time to get ready for the Halloween party. And so to read in PK, we're getting ready. PK is dressing as Carl Lagerfeld, which I was like, okay, well, I was like, PK, in case you don't remember, you are Jewish and Carl Lagerfeld was a notable anti-Semite. So good job. Good job. There's a preblematic costume right there. And she's like, aren't you, but someone else is gonna dress like Carl and he's like, oh, no one will compete with me babe. He's like, I'm gonna be Carl's cat.

Carl's famous cat. What is that with the name? Shuffet. I'm gonna be his cat, Shuffet. From Connecticut, the Connecticut cat. So, yeah, PK is like, babe, I'm gonna be his cat, chauffeur! From Connecticut, the Connecticut cat. So, yeah, PK is like, babe, I paid $800 for this week, babe.

But my head's already sweating, babe. I'm pretty thirsty. Oh, sorry, go ahead. I was just like the last thing I want to see is like, PK as like a sweaty Karl Lagerfeld. Sweaty, damp Karl Lagerfeld. Yeah. A sweaty, damp Karl Lagerfeld. Well, the next scene is Rina Porting. It's like Harry won't shoot with her.

Like, he'll do five minutes to season. He's gone. The kids ain't gonna shoot with her. She doesn't really know anybody. It doesn't seem like except the people on the show. She can't even get her dresser to shoot with her. She's on the phone like, are you excited, Joey?

Ha ha ha ha Joey? Oh, Joanne, I'm so bad. Oh, you know, he he got cut because you know, he was like, like, she says his name and he appears like a like a cloud of smoke in her kitchen. He is so he is so thirsty to be on TV. He was like all over Rachel's though on the Rachel's over project all over Lisa Rinaina I guarantee that he was ready to shoot with her. Yeah productions like holding him back No, it wasn't production it was like John Sesson and like and Hazard. They were like, yeah, uh-uh This is our show now bitch. I know they have like a radar online blimp that's like crashed on top of Joey's car

So then we go over to Kyle's house and she's like preparing for I have to say one thing here. So sorry Ben. So she's like when I do a costume. I knew that part I acted out perfectly I'm really into Halloween and then they show a montage of her Halloween costumes of Harry and they of course left out the one where they were sitting Nancy and Harry was wearing a swastik on his shirt. I was like wow. What an interesting girdle leave out of this montage. Really would appear well with a car logger felled. So this cast is just like doubling down on problematic. I know. So that would go over to Kyle's house and they're prepping for Farah Wien and they've flown Sophia out From Washington DC so she can go to this party. I'm like this is

I mean you want to see where like the patterns of I don't want to say codependency. That's too much, but like I I don't wanna say codependency, that's too much. But like, I feel like my parents would never, like, fly me out from college to go to like a birthday party, even if it's a 30th birthday party. And this is the second time they have flown her out from her freshman semester. And the first time was to take holiday photos. I mean, I'm just like,

my parents would be like, you wanna go to your grandfather's birthday party? Okay, we've used miles on Southwest Airlines. You're gonna have to take a bus through the subway and then the subway to the train and then the train to Ron Concoma and then you're gonna have to Find some random taxi because this was way before Ubers and then get that to the Long Island airport or what the ice lip airport I was like, oh my god, never do me another favor again. It was like, I felt like I was in Ishtar. It was like seven...

Yeah, I was like... Seven hours in the summer. It was more and baby, you know? Yeah, you were like aditious. But like, I don't know. There was something about this girl getting... I mean, like, don't you have school? School of work to do? Like, what about your midterms, right?

It's like, it's like October 31st. It's midterms time. I'm sorry, I don't know, for some reason it bothered me so much. I was like, do you want this girl to be independent? The fact that I feel like it didn't even resonate with me when they did their Christmas card episode. Like, they flew her away from college to take

Christmas cards Did you did I feel things did you guys buy it? I? The amount of like them I feel like I know I'm being so judgey right now and everyone is is allowed to raise their kid the way they want to, but I have to tell you, I'm like, I, you know what, I just don't care. I'm like so bored with Kyle at this point. I really don't care. I mean, you need to put her kid up on a stripper pole and like start shooting it and selling it to vivid,

like one of her friends, okay? I don't even care, like I don't care. I just want Kyle off. Take her off my fucking TV. Take her off. I've had it. Well, the problem is that Kyle doesn't do anything that's inherently interesting. I mean, yeah, you know, because, and I'm telling you, I'm saying this as someone who actually really used to enjoy Kyle quite a bit. You know, like because we really, we're only talking about the setup for the scene. The whole scene was her talking about her playboy bunny costume and like, at this like mom you're gonna wear that like yeah

But like your ass is gonna be out like I'm the mother. I got to wear it. You can't wear it like oh look here's the there's the bunny tail It's like this a name Drivel about something we just don't care about and that's really what her What her stories have become about I actually feel like Kyle Calm may now be the weak link on the show. I'm sorry to say I know and she's got the center diamonds So that tells you what path we're on for this one. Yeah, so Speaking of incipit drivel Teddy calls and she's like you won't believe what just happen What's wrong with you? I'm like you won't believe it my buddy my bunny zipper bra

Please entertain everybody while I'm getting it fixed. I was like that's your that's your night and shining armor Teddy I'm on it hi I'm Teddy everyone at this party I want you to stop and be accountable for one thing good so everybody starts arriving in their costumes and more it finally gets her clown her clown her playboy outfit, but it's to clown music like guys, a wacky scenes coming up, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, and it's like Kyle's sipping up her new costume. Like, it's great, great, great guys. Well, she stuck, she stuck in her costume because the zipper broke or something, it's

a very project runway. And so, she's like, you have to rip me out, you have to rip me out of it, you have to rip me out. So, she's like, okay, so he takes it and he's like, and she's like, are me out you have to rip me out of it you have to rip me out so he's like okay so he takes it and he's like are you crazy you just want me out of it what up the second guys it doesn't fit Kyle you just spent like 35 minutes of screen time talking about how you need to be ripped out of your costume okay you got ripped out sure I wanted to take it back Kyle you just spent $150,000 on a party. Okay, you can afford a cheap ass playboy dress Yeah, also next time go to bowling alley They don't have to dress up like that. Yeah, so

Let's see so pick in to read a rye Because like babe babe You don't think there'll be any sudden fights now babe You know my diabetes to slash one won't be able to handle it babe PK you're being ridiculous doesn't you know no fights whatsoever and a vampire is like Like didn't scare me at all then he walks in and sees a plate of carrots starts crying in the corner So to reason I guess I mean vampire. And all the ladies start gathering around.

And of course, Erica loves PK's outfit. This is really clever. I'm like coming from the lady who invented Pat your piss that really means something. Thanks for showing up today You know what's you know what's funny though is that like Everyone was going like the extra mile with our costumes and then Erica showed up She was sort of just wearing like a leopard bodysuit with like some ears and like a little kitty cat something

It was actually like a very Normal costume. It was like the sort of thing that most people wear like like whatever you see like a girl that was some target that was some last minute target that's like yeah that's like okay I wasn't gonna go out but my friend just insisted I go to this party so I'm put this headband in and put a body suit on and I'm a cat like Erica Jane the queen of having a look maybe that was her whole thing she wanted to go like, do something unexpected, but I thought that was sort of funny if that she was just like, whatever.

I'm just gonna wear this. That's like her effort for this show, you know what I'm saying? All right, well, I gotta do the night. We're gonna shoot some more McIntyre's, right? All right. But I thought when I saw the pictures of this, when it was actually happening on Instagram when they were posting the pictures,

I saw that dress and thought, oh, when they were posting the pictures. I saw that dress and thought, oh, they're dressing as each other. I thought Rinna was gonna come as Erica and then Erica was wearing that leopard dress and be Rinna and maybe she had a wig or something that we hadn't seen. That would have been great. Yeah. So Rinna shows up and she's dressed like Erica Jane and then I was like, oh, you're a bitch, you're dressed like me. Oh! And when I look at money, I look at money across the room and I say, that's me, but it isn't me, but it isn't me. And it's the me from Coachella. What a walk!

You don't want to know what I go through at night? Anybody know where I lean in so I can yell at her for no reason to stand on the front of above Don't call me don't just have got fake. Don't you say I got fake amicia It's expensive to be me So then Kim arrives Yeah, she's a she's like a gangster of some sort like a Chico's gangster So then Kim arrives. Yeah. She's like a gangster of some sort.

Like a Chico's gangster. Yes, Chico. And so she walks in and she has this awkward hello with Rina because Rina is like, she's, Rina is like angry and she's also really sticking to this Erica character. So Eric, she's like trying to like, she doesn't know how to calibrate herself so she comes on this, she comes like me. She's like, she's a fucking bully meanie. It's what she wants.

Yeah, she's mean. But she's just like, oh, hi, hi. And Kim's like, it comes like, oh, and then she's like, oh, what are we are we joking? Are we? Yeah, she's like a hugger and she moves back and won't let her hug her. And she's like, okay, and then it cuts the Kim of the diary room. And she's just like, just rolls her eyes. It's like fucking rid of it's the same. We're gonna be mean girl. This poor fucking Rina. It's the same. Rina is gonna mean girl this poor fucking

Kim richer. Sleep Kim richer is alone already. Yeah and like I've been on Rina's side to the entire Kim Richard saga but in this case. Ha, then duh. Rina, Rina, yeah, Rina was on the wrong this entire episode and Rina is like, I just, I just wish that heads up about Kim. I'm like you're at a Kyle party. Okay, it's always the same people every single party. Kim, Faye Resnick, Glenn, uh, Fat Burger, you know, it's always the same. Yeah, whatever whatever Lisa Vanderpump just got it'll be there. Yeah. Um,

So get over it. So then Kim goes over to Mauricio and says hi, whatever and the the party gets started. Rin is DJing like Eric Ajean. And Denise is in this. Denise is just chilling with Doree. I don't know, not just stupid things. They're sitting on the couch. I'm reading until I find something interesting. Camille shows up. She's a cat woman.

She's like, yeah, I'm just going to look down this walkway to the party and I'm sure nothing's scary will happen. I'm just going to walk. I'm sure there'll be be no vampires that'll jump out of me. I'm just You were saying that's a setting So Fares Nick is also there and she's basically the entire cast of Slitherin Which is videos yeah, and then to read it's like Eric are Camille and me well cats I'm the Thessianist to cat Eric is the sexy cat and Camille is the stray cat I was like that would be really funny if this whole season didn't revolve around a shelter because of you.

Damn. I was like, where do you buy a mask that covers both your faces? So then Kyle sits down with Doreet and Denise and uh She's like she's like please Please so she's like Camilla's here, but I beg you please do not make a scene tonight Please do not not here. Don't do that now. This one New York It'd be like okay. Got it. I'll make a scene. No. No. Don't make a scene. Got it. I'll make a big scene But because Beverly Hills are like okay. Yeah, let's not make a scene. So Darius is like, oh, god, look at that outfit.

You must have had a good chiff. And Carl says, chiff. And she's like, chiff, god, you know, yeah, chiff, you legs. And Carl's like, chiff. Carl's getting so mad, but it's just Darius' terrible accent saying, shave. Like, you must have really shaved if you were wearing that. And meanwhile while they're talking about Camille,

like don't make a scene about Camille, Denise is like, I have no idea. What the fuck is going on around here? I mean, I never know. I'm cool with all the time. And there's like a montage of her being like, I'm lost. What the fuck is going on again?

Yeah, then we get the best Denise confused by trying to fight any way moment. And I think it's gonna lead to a good Denise couple of seasons. So everybody is like hugging, Rinna comes marching, Ferra comes over, blah, blah, blah, they give a speech.

The women's, the women's are reminiscing on what they did on their 30th birthday. And Rinna tells a story about how Harry gave her some things and gave to an heir. And she's like, yeah, what a Vegas. And Rinna reads, like, my mom threw me a surprise luncheon in Connecticut. That's like, it brought me some flat brids. The funny thing is I can totally see that that's how to read Spent her 30th birthday. And she's like, you know what?

I'm sick of this lifestyle. I mean I can't my way into Beverly Hills I'm sick of lunges with my mom for my if that was I mean to me that sounds like Pandora's 30th birthday Like you know that that's what panties. I don't know panties 30 or not, but when she hits 30 It's gonna be like panty for your what 30th birthday party We're going to have some smoked salmon and some grazini's. Ooh. Tuna Tata, we've also brought you a velvet poppa sonja. Do you remember the real housewives of Orange County episode

where Brianna went with her friend DeVigas, had a girl strip and they went to an off-strip casino. They went to the me, which is like 20 minutes south of Vegas. I was just the two of them sitting in a booth alone, being like, yay! Yay! 30! Yay!

Hahaha! Oh, so Carl tells them about the Mammoth, Scare, and stuff, and then Doreet, let's see. Oh yeah, they all go about the Mammoth, Scar and stuff and then Doreet. Let's see. Oh yeah, they all go on the Ferris wheel. I guess he was terrified of Ferris wheels. Kyle! My seatbelt stuck!

My seatbelt stuck! I'm just... I'm just... Go ahead. Fudge you the well. Fudge you the well. Fudge you the fuck out of the well. Fudge you the well. Fudge you the fuck out of well. No seat belts required. So then they start talking they're all taking a big group picture and Rina won't stand with them. She's like being a total bitch as Erica

James. I'm not gonna say to that picture. She's over there and Kyle's like wow you're a little too much in character because Erica's not that big of a bitch. Like wow, you're a little too much in character because Erica's not that big of a bitch. Yeah, and also Rina, like you're not, like this is not like a workshop for Stella Adler, okay, you can drop the method acting for a party, you don't have to be in Erica Jane the entire time. But my theory is that she's like, fuck, I had that really awkward moment with Kim, so the only way I can get out of it is if I stay in this weird Erica Jane character the entire party, and then I can act like it wasn't me. It was me just trying to be an character. Yeah, and meanwhile Erica Jane, who is Erica Jane, did hug Kim and is being totally nice. So it's like no sense.

And like, Rina like gives the finger to the group and comes like, um, I feel like that was intended for me. But they also start laughing, you know, because it was being pretty good nature to about it. And then Rina's like, you know what, I want to say say one thing Kim, you giving Lisa Rina that bunny was really country. Okay, do you remember why she gave you that bunny back? I love that she can reframe herself as the biggest victim in the world over that stupid bunny. It was probably a regift anyway. I know and Kim was like when when Rena said said that Kim was like Everyone was like I mean it's bad when you look like when you make Kim Richards look like the voice of reason and a scene You really you really He overplayed your hand and comes like everyone's like okay, this is awkward

Yeah, so Then Kim and also shit. Yeah, me only said at least I don't have the best history You just got to down the last stop. I guess you could say and then we got to the wonderful clip of Lisa Smashing her glass that trying to strangle him and the smashing her glass and be like you don't talk about the husband Also, what's important is that during the cutaway scenes during this, the cutaway shots, there was someone else was there dressed as Carl Lacherfeld. I don't know if you saw that. No!

I thought that was amazing. That's also fucking PK. No one will think of this vibe. I know. So now, like we see Kim standing with the Reed and Camille and Kyle and And Denise is nearby and so Kim is she's like she's basically like what the fuck is up with Rina is so rude and she's like and she's like like don't try to like blame beautiful Erica Jane for Lisa Rina's behavior which was sort of a funny thing to freaking say. But she's not in such a Kim way. She's like, no, blame the beautiful Eric Jane for your behavior. No, no,

it's like covering her hands. It's like fucking camp. Yeah. No one does a diary room. And she get row up wearing Erica jeans ponytails. Denise is like, I think she looks great. I would love to wear Erica jeans ponytails. I was like, wait, all season long, the news is just sort of like hung around and like, what the fuck is going on? And now suddenly, she's piping up the dye on this hill. I was like, oh my God, here we go, this is great. Like, Carl's like, the ponytails are kind of

besides the point. She's then why makes it beside the point? It's like, what? That sounds like it even makes sense. And then Kim goes, it's not about a costume. Denise is like, then why make fun of the costume? She's like, because it's just rude to me. So why I'm making fun of it? Like Denise, like the fender of the Erika Jane costume. Like the two drinkers on this show going at each other is hilarious. So

then Denise is like, she tells us, Lisa is one of my best friends. So of course, we've talked about Kim Richards and that whole situation, you know, it really hurt her It really hurt her that bunny thing really hurt Lisa Ranna. I was like then you're not really best friends cuz come on Yeah, and she's like and Denise tells Kim she's like, you know what this isn't this a fucking stuffed animal that we're talking about And you know what it really hurt her feelings and Kim's like That's a lot. It's not a fucking lie Kim I was like I can't believe you guys are fighting about this right now and I'll talk about that Denise while she's fighting is dressed like a French Cortison

And Kim's like well, I don't believe that and she tells us what about my feelings, you know Where you talked about for years and years? I'm like, oh my god, Kim still seems very unstable. Yeah, God bless you. And Denise is like, but like, Denise goes like, well, Kim, it's not worth annihilating her for and Kim's like, I'm not annihilating her. And like, this is the one time for Kim. I feel like it's being truthful.

Kim's like, all I said was like, what the fuck? I was up with Rina and it's not worth annihilating her for. Yeah, I guess Senator rehab again. And then Karagas, well you have to admit to me, Kim's not wrong in what she's saying. Rina did do that stuff. She says, well I'm sorry, your feelings are hurt. Kim's like, my feelings are hurt, actually. She says, then what's the problem? What?

The problem is, there's no seat belts on the Ferris wheel. Oh! I just wrote, Kim has no idea how to argue with this woman and it's hilarious. Like, when Denise starts doing this every other week, it's gonna be so funny to watch her fight. Does she make zero sense? Yeah, this, like, picking, like, such a random fight

about the costume and then the bunny and then I was like which is it you're right. It made no sense So, uh, so Rina is still doing, you know method acting as Erica and Denise Denise and Doree are are standing with Rina and they're telling They're telling Rina about this weird fight that just happened between Denise and Kim, which was good because then we got a flashback to the cheesecake party where Runa and Kim tried to mend fences and I was happy because we got to see Eden Sassoon and I missed that Eden Sassoon. I can't be used a little more carny Wilson myself. I know. Well me too me too

Yeah, so Denise is a guide walk away. I mean who cares about some fuzzy fucking bunny, right? And Rina she's like, hey, we're in it. Rina's like, Finn is not here. Don't mention her name I don't give a fuck about Rina I hate Lisa Rina. Oh my god. Before Eric, oh my god. I know. And then Kim sort of like walks up on this group while they're talking.

And Doreed is like finishing saying a sentence. It doesn't matter what she was saying, but she's just like wrapping up what she said. But they're clearly talking about the spite that just happened. And she doesn't see Kim coming up behind her. And Kim's like, hey, Dore up behind her and Kim's like hey and to return to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her to her And we're in a second. He want me to bring this message back to Lisa Rina and Denise like, wait, wait, wait, wait, I'm Erica, Erica. I want Erica to be Lisa Rina for real. This is love that Denise is so used to this from her hallmark movie life. No.

Patrick's usually walking around real method like. So she's like, I want to talk. I think it should be the real Rina and Kim's like, okay, then I'll talk to the real Rina. So they go over and they have a seat. And Rina's like, if you want a moment, with these Serrina, let's sit. Hi, I'm these Serrina.

Like, it's like exactly the same. And like, Rina's like ready to sort of like fight. And Kim's like, first, you look beautiful and he's like, thank you, Kim. Thank you. Thank you. How are you? I mean, I have been over the top in my character tonight. I was working on some new techniques for my latest additions in the Kim Richards story

starting Lisa Rinna as Erica Jean. As Kim Richards. Kim's like, great. Do you want to say I'm sorry? And Rina's like, you haven't apologized to me. And Kim's like, yeah, I did. She goes, we had a good relationship. You and I didn't meet him. Remember those days?

Back when we were driving together to poker parties in the mucces. And then I got out of the limo and told everyone you were an alcoholic in a drunk. Remember, I was glad. I'd like to get back to that and come like, well, then you have to be nice to me, bitch. Yeah. So basically, the argument here is that Kim has apologized for everything and then Rina apologized about everything but then Kim still hasn't apologized for that bunny moment. So this is all down to that one bunny moment now. So Kim was basically like, listen, I wasn't trying to be offensive when I gave you the bunny

back. I thought it just wasn't. We had so much weird chik going on. I just did not think it was appropriate. So I gave it back. And so then Kim starts crying. She's like I didn't know it was wrong and Rina was like honestly Kim I was scared to see you. I was scared which is so over dramatic. It was hilarious like is I mean talk about a soap star Right, yeah, I like that that Kim goes. I just yeah, I mean apologize. I just couldn't find it myself I'm sick. I like that that Kim goes I just yeah, I apologize. I just couldn't find it myself And I see that So Rina's like, you know, I'm scared to see you and Kim's like well, I'm so sorry for that You know, it's not like you're a traffic cop. I mean, there's no reason you should be afraid of me Well, you're bathroom attendant. I mean come on

And Rina's like well, I'm sorry I reacted that way. It's not who I am. And then she didn't Rynna tells us. Giving me that bunny back was the most painful thing I've ever been through in this group of ladies. I mean it was the most hurtful thing that she's been through on the show. It was the most hurtful thing that she's been through on the show Wow, so they both I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm run as I can we move on and give like let's just forgive each other All right, just like I'm just glad we're having this conversation Under a dead angel Look it's your career Get it.

You want to do some method acting right now? Okay, I'm Kim Richards. Log, log, log. Let's pour another one back. That's going to target. Am I right? Let's put it in here. Five hands special.

Five fingers special. Oh, that's a good method acting. And that brings us to the end of real housewives of Beverly Hills every buddy. Yeah, we are going to be back tomorrow to talk to them real house of New York and then of course go to watchcraftpins.com to get all that beautiful new merch including the Madison Mountain, you sure. And more importantly our pre-sale is going on for New York and in DeNapolis. Make sure you get those tickets before they sell out. New York always sells out.

So you have to really... you got a hustle baby. Hustle. And then of course next week we have got Milwaukee. So we have tickets still left. We just want everyone to come. We want to be a big fun happy show. So everyone come to the Milwaukee show. Watch your crappens.com for all of that. Yeah, and if you want this recap on video or this week's Real Housewives of New York on video, remember to go to Crappins on demand and get them there, okay? So for our Patreon, we'd love you guys.

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