Watch What Crappens - RHOBH: Sips, Sails, and Malarkey

Episode Date: September 30, 2021

*Also avail as video on Crappens On Demand http://bit.ly/crappensvideo* The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills ends its girls trip to Del Mar on a forgiving note and a wine tasting. Don't worry, though, Erika's here to feed us all more Malarkey. Our premium bonus is a recap of Great British Baking Show episode 1. Find all of our premium bonus episodes at https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cupi from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. I have cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cr Well, hello and welcome to watch what happens to podcast for all that crap we just love to talk about on your profs. Okay, I'm Ronnie Karam. Guess who's with me? His handsome, sexy, smart, and he just wrote a recap for a Vanderprung rules over on the dip.com.

You should go check it out. His name is Ben Madelger. Hello, Ben. Hi, how are you? How are you? I'm great, it's just adjusting my webcam here, because I was, didn't like the way I was framed here on this crap and on demand episode slash recap of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. I'm on demand episode, I'm checking my boogers, looks like I'm okay.

Welcome to the show, everybody. Today is Real Housewives of Beverly Hills day. A couple things. Pumper rules is back. We did an almost two hour recap on that yesterday. If you're into that sort of thing, you'll find that. Also, this is an on demand video. We are on video today. Find it at patreon.com slash watch crap. And it's $5 level. Okay. Pumper rules was also a video. And we're doing a show called kind of a show. It's like a call in party line type thing over on an app called Greenroom with Spotify. So go get

the green room app. It's free. Follow Ronnie Kerim and Ben Madelker at 7 p.m. and 10 p.m. Eastern on Mondays. We do this show. It's real cash. We talk to you guys, talk about whatever you want to really. And that's enough of my shillin. Man, how are you? How are you? I'm a little sad because we got the dreaded line at the end of this episode. Next week on the season finale of Real House Over Beverly Hills. I didn't even notice. Yeah, it's the penultimate episode of the season guys, but luckily There's four reunions before another four reunions before another four It'll be a 25 part reunion special that will take us a season 10 or whatever season it is Yes, and it is the Chinese New Year's episode, which looks really fine So it's like we get some bitchiness at a Chinese New Year's party.

That's a great time to do it. You're of the ox. Who even is? Not me. Now I do. Well, it's hot because you know that ox, I don't know if you heard about it, but it drove off the side of a mountain and rolled over its car and broke its ox ankle and it turns out at a cataract that exploded into its brain and the brain needed surgery and then the ox

got lost in the snow. So we don't even know what year it is anymore. Tell you this much though, what's that ox made it back up the cliff they saw Tom stumbling back home the main kick Tom in the head which put us into another Jim and a cricket sort of situation. Poor Tom. He's got a microwave for a head man I didn't think very good anymore, but he can't cook you up a good to steam up mother fucking pizza roll

I'll tell you that much But I need to put a plate in his head, but they can't long account with the microwave So it's just a problem. I got truly a lot on my plate And it happens to be the same plate that want to put it in his head So there's a lot to think about at the moment So we are still in Del Mar my plate and it happens to be the same plate that want to put in his head. So there's a lot to think about at the moment. So we are still in Del Mar. Okay.

We're in Del Mar for the vacation, the big girls trip. And I was real worried about this episode because last week's previews were just a lot of like there are a trolley. Now they're wine tasting and usually I hate these kind of episodes, but I really like this one. I thought it was really fun I left a lot during this episode because this episode the women did sort of the classic Real House as a Beverly Hills thing that they've been doing for the past few years But this felt like the first time that that the show was sort of saying like look at these idiots, right? Because we have watched God we've sat through so many scenes

of these women just like kissing Erica's ass and just like, that was hilarious, Erica. You're so brave. For years, for no good reason. And this is the first time where it was like, it was actually funny to watch because it was just so shameless. Yeah, it was shameless.

They still did it and they did it more than ever. And we're called, I think it helps at Gar it and they did it more than ever and we're called. I think it helps at Garcels there like the fuck are these. They're so excited. We're kind of amazing. So now we started off the plan is to go to Temecula for a wine tasting. And you know, I've really voiced my opinions about Temecula wine tasting before I'm not going to get into it again, but you know, I'm happy for these women that they get to experience it. I mean, I guess, I mean, there is a lot of evidence

pointing towards your distrust of Tobicula wines in this episode, but we'll get there. So, Kathy's like, we're going to Tobicula and Sutton's rolling around on her little thing. Everybody's meeting in the lobby, and Erica is not coming. Guys, Erica's not coming today. So we start with a-

What's happening with Erica's riding the bike? Ooh. It's so hard. Look at my life. Look at my life. I can't even go wild tasting and say I got to stay here. Hold up in my luxurious suite.

I'm not even more luxury hotel. Look at my life And then we get a little real housewives of Salt Lake City And the ladies are now on the winery steps talking to Jared He's also the name of the subway guy. That didn't end well I don't want an employee greeting me named Jared into any kind of restaurant establishment, okay? No, no Yeah, and Kathy is saying she's like well, I I have a tried to make the wines before so let's explore

I like wine that doesn't have too many tannics or too sweet or too oaky. I'm like one of the three little bears I'm like I think that was Goldilocks actually. I just I like the thing that one of the three little bears has very specific wine tastes. Yeah. So, Kathy, yeah, I couldn't remember. So what did happen in Goldilocks? Goldilocks broke into the three bears house and tried all of their food, right? She was exhibiting a lot of white privilege and she walked in and she took first. She was like, oh, this part is like too high and this is too cold and then this one is just

perfect okay so then and then she's like oh this bed is too hard it's mostly soft and it's too big and she's small and then she finally takes like the kids bed or whatever she's just like a brat and she deserved to be eaten up by those bears and unfortunately unfortunately, they ate her. Do they? Is that how it goes? I think so or maybe that's my version of it. I would like all the story.

I'll look it up. Was Goldilocks eating? Was Goldilocks eating? You know what? I want to know more about the bears because that story really doesn't make sense. Why are the porges all different temperatures? They made them all at three different times like make the fucking pot of porridge. That doesn't make any sense. And why are the poor, they walk away.

Right, and leave the house, like with all your differing heated poorages. And then why are the beds all different? Did they not just buy them all to get this is a weird family? Also lock your door. Lock your door book bears. Okay. I'm looking out. I'm seeing. Look how do you gonna read the old story? The old woman wakes jumps out the window and has never seen again. Old woman. She's old in this one. What is this? A Bravo version? The Wikipedia. This is the Goldilocks, you know, 57 pretending she 36 in this story. Later variations.

I'm seeing it. I thought that she got this. Tell me this. Tell me this. Does Goldilocks sell candles? Okay. Now make it very bravo. Okay, so they're drinking wine and temecula and Kathy, they get their first taster and

it's like a champagne or some kind of sparkling wine or some kind. And Kathy's like, oh, do we do the five S's with this? And he's like, no, not with sparkling. I love when rich people do shit like that. That's all fancy and talk about their tannins and then wanna do the five S's on their sparkling. Yeah, whatever that is.

Well, apparently what the five S's are, are, see, to me they're hot, so hot, so hot, so hot is. Well, apparently what the five Ss are are, see, to me they're Huss, so Huss, so. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha like a Jared, of course, I tried to block that out. Jared is running a cable car, wine tour, cable car, very close to Subway, serving the same vein, public transportation, be careful everyone. So he has like a cable car, well, you know, cable cars, Subways, mass transportation, which I'm just trying to connect dots here, okay, follow the, follow the crumbs, okay. So, the guy he has, like a cable car that they're going to hop into and drive around, it's on wheels, and he goes, he goes, so this is our 1914 cable car, and we're going to go, head is, it's a cable car from San Francisco, head, head.

I'm like, okay, right now, you need to settle down. You need to settle down. This is too much energy for right now. She's like that with everything in this episode. It's like, it's a trolley. It's a trolley. It's a trolley. It's a little girl running from free bears. Look at her go.

She's running. Um, now Jared, okay. She's like, so they're talking about the five Ss and then Kathy's like, okay, I know them it's Sip sniff swirl. He goes wrong order. He's like bitchy Jared and then she goes, okay, well see sniff swirl sip And he goes and the producer tells Kathy one more and Jared says Saver and then Kathy says, swallow. So I'm not sure who was right,

but I'm not really trusting that Jared even knows the five bests at this point. I don't think he knows. I think that's why he tried to, he tried to throw her off her game by saying wrong order, wrong order. Like maybe you want a swallow then saver or saver, then sip.

I don't know. It was a very tomeculine distraction, Jared. Okay, don't think we're not onto you, sir. And there was also, I love the visual metaphor of them driving around in this cable car, and then, dude, it's like, gee, what do I do with the rest of this wine? And they're like, do I just throw it off the side?

They're like, yeah, yeah, yeah. So they're on this cable car and she's taking wine, and just like throwing excess wine onto the ground. I felt like that was a good metaphor for this show of visual metaphor. Well, if anybody is wondering why Temecula smells like Bar-Rot, there you go. Dirt's just having people litter it off the side of the boat

or the side of the thing, trolley. Hmm. So let's go to Fuselli Sela's and we're gonna say, Look at that, guys. Ha ha ha, that's pretty. That is pretty. That is so pretty. That is pretty. Dam so pretty That's pretty

Dammit I like this very much I like this one very much What do you guys think? I think it has good flavor Good flavor I think it has good flavor I think it has good flavor

Because as we all know When it comes to beverages Rina has no opinion of her own I mean I really think that there should be a montage of people ordering drinks and then Rina piggyback opinion of her own. I mean, I really think that there should be a montage of people ordering drinks and then Rina piggybacking on the word. That sounds like a good idea. More white wine, more tannins.

Yes, I think that is a great idea. More red wine. Yes, more red wine. What did you say? Rina has no opinion on anything that needs to be ingested, if you've noticed, because remember when they went to Yolanda's fourth of July thing and Erica's like, oh, I need a hot dog. I love it. I even once a year. I'm gonna say, what's a year hot dogs? I love hot dogs once a year. What's a year hot dogs? Yeah.

You know, it's so funny. I actually went to Yolanda's Instagram last night and it was making me laugh so hard because she has this ridiculous co-dependent relationship with her with her children and then her children's you know famous people or girlfriends and girlfriends because I think she likes to bask in the reflected glory and basically her Instagram is just her like wishing people happy birthday and like also highlighting her connection to them she's like oh to do a leap a happy birthday and like also highlighting her connection to them. She's like oh To do a leap a happy birthday to the lights of my life who decided to date the other other one

Thank you for all the music you bring to our hearts Thank you. I love you as like what is this? Oh to do a leap? But you're doing I understand that she's dating Anne-Mar which by the way is crazy and do a leap do better do better do a leap of your doing. I understand that she's dating Anwar, which by the way is crazy. And do a leap of do better, do better, do a leap of, but also like, it's like a million of them. It's like, Zen Malik, the most beautiful man. I have to say, Happy Birthday to you on this wonderful day and the life that you bring in. Ronald McDonald, a clown, but a gentleman. Today is your birthday. Happy birthday. But then do a leap of response back

because I'm on it right now and you're wonders with this guy, new guy, guys, I don't know who he is. Yeah, she hasn't got that guy. We look a little crazy, but the dress code was silly pants or silly skirt for baby, K's birthday celebration. Oh, four, five dot, not four for 5 ellipses

Face with heart sunflower shrug Brawn lady shrug and then it's a picture of her and her boyfriend holding hands walking with normal jeans But they've pinned sunflowers on them and under do a leap is like so cute Five exclamation points and four yellow flowers that aren't sunflower. Do Alipa so excited. She's just loves her. I thought that you'll long didn't like do Alipa

because I think the way this all started was, I saw a picture of Anwar walking along and do Alipa was cropped out and underneath it was you'll on to saying, Happy birthday to the love of my life, the other one you are not just my boy, you are a man, have a happiest of birthdays. And I saw Dueliepa sort of cut out.

I was like, there's no way that Yolanda is gonna cut out someone famous attached to her family unless she doesn't like them. So I have a theory that Yolanda secretly does not like Dueliepa. Well So I have a theory that you'll on that secretly does not like to Alipa. Well, I have a theory that Onwara's modeling career is basically debate bus. That's the most important. From looking at those pictures, that is basically my theory.

I don't get Onwara. I don't get it, but you know, I'm too deep. I mean, it's super cute and everything. It's just very like young tattooed twink kind of guy. Uh-oh, was that home of foot? Oh, was that home with without a micro? Was that a micro? I'm just a micro. Hi, I'm Lisa Barlow to talk to you about microaggressions. I hate them. Yeah, and he didn't get me blue check comments on his post which he gave so do we leave a just totally fucked over and more. Thanks from that.

Do a, okay. Yeah, sorry, do we Lipa. Sorry. Okay, well, I know you guys are dying to hear more Goldilocks references. Let's get back to the recap, shall we? By the way, Goldilocks, there's a strong parallel between Yolanda's children and the Goldilocks bears. Okay, let's just say right there. Dua Lipa was like, one, I don't like this bed, do I don't like this bed, three. don't like this bed three. I like sorry I've very forced reference to that new rule song. Yeah, I don't really get it I just it's not your fault. It's my fault You know, I've just accepted that I'm old and I'm just not gonna get it

So I just say hey, you know Lexi I'll call her just play some old people shit, you know I don't get some lies. Just like Lexi. It's an old queen here Just play me some old queen shit like yes, bitch She's like yes, yes, bitch here is the original cast recording of guys and dolls by Duolipa Lock me a little night. Okay, here's the bonus greatest hit sung by Meckin Trainer. My God, do you hear that? Oh my God. So, anyway, they're drinking wine,

and now they're on the next vineyard, and Kyle's hair is getting blown around in the cable car, which I felt like was Mother Nature having revenge, which was fun. She's like, oh my God, my hair, what's happening? What's happening, my hair! What's happening? What's happening, my hair? So they get to another winery,

and there's more wine, just more wine, more wine, more wine, and they love the wine at this place, because they're also wasted at this point. But it's so funny because these girls, it's like they know that their boring is fuck, right? Because whenever it gets to be too boring, they just, it's like they sense it,

and then boom, Doreet's like, so everybody's just fun. So, Rin and Kyle store, you're close this morning, what did Erica say? So now they can at least talk about their only plotline on this show. Oh, by the way, Erica was on Twitter because Andy said, Andy was on some late night show saying, this reunion is gonna leave forever so long. And Erica retweeted that and said, why do you think it's so long? Because of me. It's like, wow, congratulations.

You're robbing of orphans and we, Tom's robbing of orphans and widows. Welcome to the show. So take a bow, Erica. Take a bow. Take a bow, yeah. Take a bow. Yeah. Congratulations.

So I also just want to point out before we dive into this, that when they're drinking the wine, Garcella goes, if dating was as fun as wine tasting, I'd enjoy dating so much more. I just line them up and see which one I want to take home with me. I'm like, a, that's called going on to Tinder. B, also, like, this attempt to sort of like bring this, this B story about Garcell's dating life. It is just, it is not taken off. They're trying hard.

They're not just trying to bring it into the wine tasting. God bless, it's time to retire it. Yeah, I think that Garcell, they keep trying to like make this personal story happen and Garcell seems a little guarded in that way, you know? So I think they just need to keep Garsell being hilarious and the voice of reason,

and not really worry about all the other stuff, you know? Just like keep her there calling everybody out and being charming and wonderful, and in that role, you know? Yeah, so now this comes, this, so now, getting back to what you were saying about Dorit's during the conversation to Erika. Now it becomes what happens most of the rest of the episode, it's called gasp theater, which is when the women spend mostly seeing gasping over small-darets face in the whole thing is.

So Kyle calls like... Chee-chee yet the judge granted the brother to be his conservator But they were suggesting he'd be put into a home And the home I mean I thought everything was seized you know, but like it turns out that Tom was still in his home while he was burger-erized What? G What? While he was sporadical rise, girls something what? G What what what I got something and I want to add something Tom Let's home alone During the burglary girls girls girls

The burglary He has cataracts, he has eyes. And the ex-boded exploded cataracts. Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!

Oh! And then, Sutton's like, well, put this man somewhere where he can be taken care of, because his wife isn't there to take care of him. No, Sutton, that's not how we jeered up. Yes, that was in her diary room, so she didn't get out. She was sudden, by the way, has clearly filmed a bunch of pickups midway or like three quarters the way through the season. And now she has like the wind of the internet in her sales. And she knows like she's no longer being tentative, now she's like all sassy and be like,

gosh, gosh, gee, golly, she really should have someone who's gonna take care of him, he should be in a home. Am I right? Internet folks who are on my side? Am I right? Like everything she's all excited now. The red dress is the one that she's filming in when she's just being terrible to Erica

and it's hilarious. So this is like a very red dress heavy episode for her. So, her so goes, what? And we're like, yeah. She had her son take care of the house, so he came over and he boarded up the window. And then his son, this is a very dramatic... Rolled his car. Five times. J- J- J-

J- J- J- J- J- J- J- J-

J- J- J- J- J- J- J- J-

J- J- J- J- J- J- J- J- J- Exploding glaucoma out of fear and then Kyle goes but then Kyle Kyle goes because it was snowing and they're all like No Kyle what Kyle's just sitting there twisting it. She's like I'm not getting the reaction I want I just need to keep upping this right? We get

Like snowing what What? AHHHH! GEE! What? AHHHH! Um, and so it goes, uh, snowing, and Crystal goes, what? I mean, this can't be real. Like, flipping cars, snow.

I mean, we freaking live in LA. I haven't seen snow in LA since I was seven. I mean, that's like putting snow on prior to rock. It's just not gonna happen if you know what I'm saying. And to read, say, well, I haven't heard of anyone who flipped the car 15s and walked away and skied. I mean, that's something you're only seeing the movies. I mean, and not even, I mean, that never happened in Halloween kills, which I was in coming out in two weeks. True. It's all true. And Rina's doing that thing where she's shaking her head

while she's insisting something's true. She's like, it is true. So Garsell says, she's like, well, Eric's stories are unbelievable because they're hard to believe. And Sun says, how does she know? I'm just curious.

I think these are diary room. Thanks. Of course, there would never be said to public. Yeah, she's like, well, how does she know? I'm just curious. I think these are diary room. Thanks. Of course, they'll never be set public. Yeah, she's like, well, how does she know? I'm just curious about that. Oh, I'm sorry. Sunset does say that in public. Yeah, she does say it because the reats like, well, how could he be living there? Loom. Oom people can't live in their own. Even more. We've got a little dish out of forum in case any something. got a little dish out for him in case he needs something. And so yeah, when when Sun's like, like how does she know I'm just curious, Garth sounds like, no, no, no, no, no, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't do this.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I'm just asking questions, questions, yeah. So she goes, this story is a bit confounded and the more stuff that comes out, the more it doesn't make sense. But I don't want to play Fant2Drew anymore. This story is a bit confounded and the more stuff that comes out, the more it doesn't make sense. But I don't want to play Fant to Drew anymore. Which you know, she's heard the internet, right? Because that's what the internet is calling her.

I just thought with her calling her, I didn't know that. Yeah. She's like, I don't want to play Fant to Drew anymore. I'm going to let Scooby and Scooby's free and figure it out. Y'all figure that. I just can't. I just can't. And as we all know, Scooby refers to a very, very intrepid scuba diver who gets the bottom of mysteries right?

Right, I'm just reading it off again. I don't know what these references are. Listen, here's what I have to say to all of this nonsense. Hold me closer, tiny dancer. You'll get it soon. You'll get it soon. Okay. So Kyle. No, I don't have a fight about this. I'm funny because Sutton went on watch what happens live and she was saying well, it's funny that Lisa Rina is so man about not getting a thank you About Harry sauce. Oh, yeah

She said at my table. I invited her to sit at my table for the Elton John Oscars party And that was $10,000 a seat and I didn't give a thank you. So that's that's pretty odd of her. And then Rinna's like, oh really bitch. I know Elton. We always got his party and I was invited. Okay. And we did sit at your table, but I was invited. But it's like, okay, but were you invited and did you pay for your own $10,000 seat for you and hear me? Because otherwise you were sitting in a $20,000 worth of seats. The sudden pay for, okay? Hmm.

So, I did hear that. I love that's a sort of petty controversy that I love. I know. So, which it had made it onto the season, this isn't fair. I know. So, Kyle is saying how Eric is very angry about the people who've deserted Tom, which is funny because I think that's literally Eric Astoria Linus deserting Tom.

And so then Crystal, she starts talking about how she hopes that Tom gets a good caretaker. And she starts thinking about her dad who died of dementia. And she starts crying at the table, because it's bringing up a lot of memories. And son is, you know, she's like oh no and Crystal says She's just talking about how it's a very Chinese thing you take care of your parents and like she told Rob to buy a house And to take care of him and how other people don't have those means and she's just like crying and they're like

We're one more wine please. She's crying more wine more wine Yeah, so then Kathy's like, oh, I'm surred and roughed, but I'm gonna go back and have a massage and Kyle starts cracking up. So, why are you laughing? And she tells us Kathy's like, you know, I haven't had a headache like this

or like head neck ache like this in such a long time. Ever since I was a little girl, I was in this commercial, this Barbie commercial, and I got hit in the head, really hard, with a golf ball. Yeah. Man, just when you thought Kyle had an original storyline with her nose, like Michael Myers,

cause her to have a nose job. No, Kathy did it first, golf ball in the head and a Barbie shoe. Every single time, like every time, man, this is crazy. I also love how Wayne Kathy is telling the story about why she has like chronic neck pain. They like put up this picture of her from 1967. This like Gerber, Gerber baby kind of photo,

but she's like two years old, like in the pose and whatever. Like, ever since, like, I'm just imagining this, the precious little girl in the 60s, like basically Don Dra draper's daughter getting hit with a golf ball at like her neck I don't know somehow her neck is like officially like ruined for the rest of her life. I know that's just how shit was done in the 60s I just put a little girl there. Okay now stand back there and swing really hard What were you shooting they weren't shooting on location in those days like what the fuck was going on on that soundstage? Or were they? Oh, and you know I do know big Kathy was like you stand up and you'd be a big little girl and you do that second Take okay, because one of the three of you is gonna be a star or a cat big Kathy was the one who did it like she hit her with a golf ball

So she could get the money from the studio or whatever that woman was something Big happy is like okay little Kathy. I just was talking to director when we when we shoot this barbie commercial They need to see pain. Okay, so just bear with me with this Okay, so Rina's like can we get some more of that number one? Which I think is funny that they're calling the wine number one in Temecula. He's known for their piss wine. Can I also get a bottle for everyone in my dad's honor? That's what my dad would do.

That's what my dad would do. So then it's sunset and cows like, oh my god, can you believe it? Look at the sunset guys. Sunset, just be honest. Don't walk in you. They're all cracking up because it's the annual Kyle gets drunk on a lady's trip and then impersonates someone's walk.

And since Teddy isn't around anymore, she's now doing Sun's walk, which is pretty funny. This is Kyle's wheelhouse is that she does good impersonations of the other castmates. Is there a world in which Kyle puts on a purple blazer and rolls up the sleeves and starts doing sets at the improv because maybe this is Kyle's specialty, you know, like some sort of like observational humor who knows. But that because then she starts doing Eric impersonations and she's like, we're not good. The door is shut. the door is shut. And then they're like all laughing and all that stuff.

And then certain's like, oh honey, I've got nothing to say to you, you fucking cut fitness. Gressard's like, well she wouldn't say that, because yes she would. It's time for commercial, it's time for a crap and it's commercial. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, someday's parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful take on parenting. Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brownleur, we will be your resident

not-so-expert experts. Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding, and thinking, oh yeah, I have absolutely been there. We'll talk about what went right and wrong. What would we do differently? And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone. So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. So then back at the hotel, there's a knock-hunter store.

The haunted hotel, yes, still haunted. And it's the ghost of a Coming over almost said Dorenda again, God speaking of ghosts So yeah, there's knock on Kyle's door and to read like who do you think it is? It's the fashion police and she's with sudden and and Sud's like, and I'm the mall cop because she's on her little scooter thing. And Paul Blartman, through this episode for sure. She really is, she's going all over with that thing.

So Kathy's not feeling well, or whatever, I had him tonight's plans. And Kyle is like, did you talk to Erica and to read says, gee, but I feel is so bad because she did clear a lot of the picnic the other day, satan, and unfortunately you missed it. And they start talking about Erica, expanding on the story about,

but they're just totally trying to bait Sutton here, right? So they sit Sutton down and it's like, well, she cleared it up and carousers. Well, the thing was, we just didn't know, like we didn't know there was a brain trauma three years ago. She goes, well, she cleared it up and cried, says, well, the thing was, we just didn't know, like, we didn't know there was a brain trauma three years ago. She goes, well, alleged, she said alleged yesterday. Which, of course, set set off, just just planned. And so, I'm like, well, so he allegedly was unconscious for 12 hours.

Well, that's what she said yesterday, allegedly, which allegedly said it, or she said allegedly, allegedly, she said allegedly. allegedly so did she say it allegedly who's hard to say I was actually on a ledge when I heard it so Sun tells us like why is your story changing all the time now everything is alleged I think y'all alleged allegedly drank the cool aid because you're not even looking at the facts. Fans, he drew Scooby's necks, internet. So let me get this straight.

He's thrown from the car, he calls her, she finds him. We got off the accident and we moved on, sat in. Why you sub-set something? And then Doree tells us, you know, you don't want to push Erica too far because then we're left looking like an idiot for not asking. I'm like, well, that's the whole point. That's why she snaps at you, because you get too scared to ask other questions. Right. So then they leave and certain says,

well, I'm not feeling well now. I'm going to stay home and watch a movie with Kathy in bed. And they all start laughing. So then they go downstairs and all meet up in the lobby, and Rinna's showing off her Norma Kamali coat She's like from a long time ago What is that at the bottom is that a store tag? Oh, it's a rat trap It was a micro-rosh. It's been in my garage And then

And then, um, uh, Doreet Kyle's putting on her jacket to go downstairs to lobby and Doreet's like, honey, you're not rooting that outfit with that jacket. Come on. And Kyle's like, but I'm cold. She's like, well, and Sun says, well, I will make my own entrance on my scooter and Doreet literally goes, well, can you stand 10 feet behind me so you don't ruin my entrance? And it's supposed to be, it is like, they're laughing, but you know that Doreet was like serious about that. Yeah for sure which is why I love to deep in more. So Rina's like Erica, Erica's got late text on, she's got late text. Erica, you know what's a good day when you've got your late text on. And she's wearing those like latex pants, like us from Amsterdam, but not as the full body suit,

just as pants and a sweat. She's wearing the cash version of the latex body suit. It's like when a child has a tantrum, and then, like, or it's like when a kid falls over and hurts his knee, and then cries, and then goes to his room, and then he comes back and he's in a better mood over and hurts his knee and then cries and then goes to his room and then he comes back and he's in a better mood and all the parents are like, oh look, look how cute you are.

Look you got your latex on. Oh. Yeah, Erica's all over the place in this episode, right? Every time they show her, she's in a different personality. So now she's really happy. It's like, hey, guys, we've just split out some life hacks. We have a good time. It's like, hey, guys, we've just split out some money. Take that good time. It's like, what happened to her?

So they go, they're going outside and Sutton has to take the sidewalk because she can't come down the steps so she comes around and Eric goes, oh, taking the easy road, I say, the low road. Oh. And I was like, maybe we should go back to not talking. Yeah.

So they also down at this like, at this space. And it's funny because I think, I think college goes, oh my god, we got the space all to ourselves. Oh my Kyle, it's only you and Ghost in this hotel. There's no one else here. So, Erica, they're like, oh, they got a cramp buck. Get the hell out of here. And then of course, time to order.

And what does Erica get? A hot toddy. And then what course, time to order and what does Eric I get? Uh-huh, Totti. And then what is he going to say? Ha, ha, Totti. That's a good idea. That's a good idea. That's a good idea. Uh, uh.

Um, so then we sit there and stare at them eating claw whatever. Clothes and hot pot. Really weird. Yeah, it's really weird at the moment. Yeah, I kind of made me want crap actually quite a bit So Klaus like you know today was nice, but we did miss you Erica. Did you watch CNN bed or murder shows and air cuz oh Yeah, I watched one murder show Love murder love love love love love that you did something fun. God. I love you Erica love murder

Love it love murder And we see Erica murder hot toddy And then we see six hours earlier Erica is watching TV and just eating pizza and I'm surprised that we didn't see like six hours and one and like one minute earlier, Rina, be like, pizza's a good idea. Pizza's a good idea. Let's have pizza. I'm surprised they didn't pan the camera down a little bit so you can see Mikey laying on the floor just like holding the piece of pizza up like. So, Eric is like, Yes, girls, you know, I'm just so overwhelmed. They didn't mean it to escape my own personal situation. And I go, you know what?

It's not so bad. Kyle goes, yeah, it's like I could be chopped in the pieces. This is a better alternative. That's actually a lesson I learned the hard way on the Halloween set coming out in two weeks. It's a feature film I'm in. You know what I'm going through does suck, but this man has done a lot for a lot of people and people can step up. Wait. Who else thought that sentence was going to go in a very different, who else thought like what I'm going through sucks, but then when I think of the victims who never received compensation

I realized what I'm going through is not I thought that's where she was setting up for the first time, but then it's like But what I think of this man and him and his cataracts that exploded because he was punched in the face by a yaddy Kills me he stole money from burn victims and widows and orphans, ma'am. What the fuck are you talking about? So it's clown music, because everyone's kind of like politely cringing, right? And Teresa,

well, he did a lot of good, but his guilty, if his guilty, doesn't that mean he's tomorrow to bat? Yeah, and Erica goes, you know, he's done a lot of a lot of people who could covet and help right there like why is market that why is anyone helping him? Cuz Tom raised him like the fucking fresh prince of Pasadena, that's why what are you talking about? How much is he done for your son? You've said that your son has been living with you for years living off of Tom.

Why the fuck shouldn't your son help him? And this now begins just such a hilarious scene of these women. Like we've seen them kissing Ericka's ass, but they are like, they are so out of control in this scene, especially when Ericka's been so shady all season. And Erica is like, well, you know, my son flipped his car five times and Kogos, thank God he's okay, thank God. Well, you know, a little man on a cloud came by with a fishing bull and got him right off the side of that mountain. And now he's all fine, but I said you better watch out for those badanas son

Yeah, the family was driving home and he now he trusted a little turtle in the cloud And I said watch out son because they'll throw turtle shells at you next and he said fuck you mom Cuz we've got that guy the relationship and then sure enough a little cloud came and threw some turtles at him And he said mom and before he know it, his car exploded, turned into a Vespa. He looked like Donkey Kong. He flipped over a couple of times. Skid, gotta, had platform heels, jumped back onto a table and sang the score. Rint, I mean, that kid is something else. You know, I've, I've never seen such strange weather patterns in L.A.

But it was snowing and then all of a sudden I know a lot and both strikes him and shrunk him. My son was shrunk for a good 10 seconds. He almost couldn't see where he, and then I don't know where a squid, a squid came out of the Pasadena library and spat inconous face. I mean, it's a miracle he's alive to this day. God, I hate when those things squirt the ink in his face.

These are so annoying. It's a so bad thing in Mario Kart. No, the blue shell is, I think the blue shell is truly the worst thing of all time. No, squirt, the oil squirt. Well, the blue shell is, I think the blue shell is truly the worst thing of all time. No, squirt, the oil squirt. Well, the oil squirt's annoying because it doesn't really, it doesn't really prevent you from seeing it's just annoying. It's just visually annoying. I don't like it. You're basically like Tom when a burglar comes over. It's like, okay, so then, um, got Kyle's like, my god, he's okay.

And something tells us there's something weird about this. So they want to prove that they're her friend instead of asking questions. I mean, come on, compare that to last year with Denise. And they really did show the most innocent clip of last year with Denise. We're rena saying Denise, have you said things about me? Did you say things to Erica? Like that's what you showed after all the shit they put her through. They're still not on team Denise's editors.

That's for sure. Yeah. Well, I'm sure they, Denise was a pan the ass of them. I think they're probably happy to like, Rick, Denise, a little bit too. So, um, Rick, her over the coals. So, Erica is now doing her like Jackie Mason, cat skills bitch.

She's like, huh, so then, don't put the boom, boom, boom. So then, so my son calls me out. And we have a very unconditional mother's son relationship and he goes, what the fuck's going on with your neighbor? Am I right? And everyone's like,

I'm all right ladies. I have a question. You ever been living next to a man as accused of cannibalism on him when he has sex talk? And the people say, you're sex talking with him. And the and the boss sounds like are you fucking him? I said I'll tell you what I'm fucking not a cannibal, but I would have been meant I can get some money out of it for granted. Wow, give me a dollar. I'm pour over here everyone. And then we see a headline that says Erica Jane and army hammer and neighbors. Man, she

really can't pick him. I mean, if army eating widows and orphans it would be really full circle You know guess is just who he's eating the problem So Erica is still bragging about the rich dude. She could fuck if she wanted to and she's like oh, you know my son He's always so tired of these just like my wife such a fucking disaster. You fucking idiot goddamn it Like wow your your relationship with your son sounds charming Yeah I'm like wow your your relationship with your son sounds charming Yeah, I can't help it. I live next to crazy and so college was whole I mean like this tear from my eye cuz this is just so funny What is he saying about your Instagram? Oh?

Not a goddamn thing. I said mama's broken bang the bills like and bang the bills. Like... Carls like Erica. Erica, you are entertaining me so much I cannot wait to tell my good friend from Halloween about this. Jamie Lee Curtis. Mommy's broken, baby. You know what's funny in 1978 I did actually audition for a movie called Mommy's Broken,

bang the bills and now you're actually saying it. It's like my life that's coming to life. Erica, you're actually saying it. It's like my life, it's coming to life. I'm like, you ain't so funny! Ha ha ha! They're just like literally rolling on the floor laughing at this. Kyle Littlely says, oh my god, Erica, you're entertaining me so much, please keep going. Like, like, like, like, uh. So then, Seth is just kind of, Seth is just squinting her eyes like she does and Kaga's,

oh, and now Sutton's not talking. Kitty Cat got your tongue, Sutton Kitty Cat got your tongue. Look at Sutton, Sutton, Sutton McSilent face. She has such a quiet, like how quiet she is. She's so scared, look at her face, look at her dumb face everyone. So Sutton's like, well thanks Kyle. I mean, they watched her threaten me. So who is this helping exactly? And when it's like, oh my god, Ericka, you're so fun! So Ericka continues, oh, I have to lie if it's up, hold on, there is gonna kill me and my rock girls.

I mean, it's gonna kill me and consume me in a way that I don't want it to. And what's his name is, Army Hammer, and it's got 20 million in the bank. My rock girls. Yikes. I don't want it to with bless his name is army hammer and it's got 20 million the bike my right girls Yeah, so basically Erica got a call from a publicists this afternoon and couldn't go She couldn't go wind as thing because you need to like meet with her team to figure out how to change her image right so now I just gotta So Kyle goes you're gonna come out on top, you know Just like a car and a pass into mountain you'll be on top for a little bit

and then you'll come on down. And you're beautiful and you're talented. And you have so much going for you. I mean, it's a rough, like pass it in a, it's a rough road right now, but you're going to be okay, Erica. You really will be. And Garsell's like, so everyone's just kissing or ass, which seems kind of phony to me. But then when they cut back to the scene, I was like, oh, I know. So Doreet's like, why don't you've got such a positive outlook? Yeah, that's Erica, miss fucking positivity over there.

You people crazy. And Erica goes, yeah, well, I just love the same people succeed. I just love it. It's who I am. It's just real who I am. And know, it's just real who I am. And to be like, I know, I know. I mean, you know, you say, put yourself out there.

You're open, you're still, something. Do you remember that? And I remember when Erika said, where you paid the rent? You paid the rent. Yeah, Erika is like pulling on this thing. Like, well, I was never so, I was never as moved when you said, you paid the rent. You paid the rent. Yeah, Erica's like pulling on this thing. Like, well, I was never some, I was never as moving, you paid the rent.

You paid the rent. Listen, you do things that I'm not even able to do and you paid that rent. And sometimes like, You should try sleeping sometime. That's a real bitch. Take it, take it, my ride ladies.

And they are just like literally just blowing so much hot air up, Erica's ass. Like just like, you're just the most supportive. You're inspiring. Wow, you're wonderful and so talented. So it's like, is she coming from my store? Why is she mentioning my store, what's going on here? So, I was like, oh my God, I was thinking about your reaction

to us all showing up when you were on Broadway. Do you remember when we did that? So, yes, Kyle, you're a good person to you. Okay. It's like they just gave her a compliment for being a good person. So then you have to go remind her that you're a good person. And Erica goes, oh, yeah. And for you to charter that plane, sudden, that was cool. That was cool.

And something's like, uh, yeah, well, I know. Thanks. Thank you. So the producer asks Erica, is this you in any way trying to smooth things over with sudden? And Erica goes, no, I won't smooth. Shave over. Fuck no. Fuck no. I'm not gonna smooth shit over, but I'm not gonna ruin everybody else's rip.

See what a nice person I am. I'm the best one in this group. I don't even know why you developed me so much clearly on the most about. I'm like, you know, in a season where you're trying to show that you're not a liar and that you being open and honest is the way to build friendships and how what you see is what you get. This is maybe not the best move.

I don't know. I think it's like, she's completely erratic. Every scene she's different than her diary room is what she's saying doesn't match with the scene. I'm not really sure what's going on. She keeps changing which way she's going to play this and it's confused everybody the whole season and it's really duck her into a hole, you know. I also don't understand why like, you know, Sutton is miss Fakie fake, right? By pretending to be like nice, according to Erica. But then now Erica can do this because she just wants to make you doesn't want to ruin it for everyone else like well

That's what Sutton's doing half the time, you know, so this is I don't know that I mean what Erica is doing is is the polite nice thing to do in a group of people But it just bothers me that she takes this moral high ground about lying and that the whole group as Generally has this whole thing about like being open and honest if you have something to say, you say it. If you don't say it, like, I don't wanna hear six months down the line that you feel somewhere else and then here's Erica doing this.

Yeah, so then, you know, they start dancing, Rinnah pulls out like some Bluetooth speaker or some shit and they all start dancing probably to like Alan what's the guy doing my music? Alan's are yeah, Alan was our jams. It's probably like This song is called like Brandy sends a text So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning.

So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning.

So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is the morning. So now is up until at least 11 a.m. So what does Kyle do?

Kathy Kathy are you awake Kathy Kathy like the fan is going it's dark Kathy Kathy Kathy Kathy and she's like Like once Kathy finds like oh Sorry, she's asleep. I'm like yeah Kyle

like, uh, oh, sorry, she's asleep. I'm like, yeah, Kyle. What about her door being closed, indicate that she's not asleep and not her not answering texts. So then Garcell goes over to Seton's and she's like, good Lord, how do you invite someone over and tell them to hold? Oh, I forgot you're on that rolling thing.

Ha, ha, ha, ha. So they go sit outside and they start talking of Erica, of course, because Erica was nice to Sutton and Garsell's like, I mean, she was acting like nothing had happened. Do I trust that? Do I trust it? She goes, well, I guess we'll see what today brings. So Erica's upstairs with her glam squad and she's getting everything done. And she...

The... Sorry. I was just gonna talk about how like, she, they're like the glam slot, and then Erica is looking at herself in a mirror and says, Oh Lord, I need to go to the plastic surgeon. And then when she says that, her makeup guy Preston goes,

You just messed up your lap and he cracks up. And they're like, Ha, ha, ha ha ha ha ha ha. I'm like, what, what, what is this world that that she's stuck in? She's the new Angeline and you know what? We said it a long time ago that she was going to be the new Angeline in LA. Well, I think we said that like her first or second season,

but she is totally going to be Angeline. And for those of you who don't know who that is, Angeline, some lady in LA who married some really rich dude, and she just wanted to be Angeline. And for those of you who don't know who that is, Angeline, some lady in LA who married some really rich dude, and she just wanted to be famous more than anything. And so he would buy her billboards all over LA that were all over like Hollywood and West Hollywood, the sunset strip that would just say Angeline.

And she'd be like, she's a blonde lady with big old fake everything, boobs, face, everything looks crazy. Everything is pink at all time. She drives a pink, is it a lamp or a bed? A Corvette. A Corvette. A Corvette, yes. She's a ministerial.

You can still see her driving all around and then she stops and then the Queen's all, all of us run around her because it's like our religion, you know, we're like, oh my god, it's Angeline! And we pretend that we're shocked that she's driving around and then she flips up on her trunk to sell you T shirts of herself I mean, yeah, this is gonna be Erica She has not you're right and she has not Angelina's not had a billboard up in quite some time by the way But she's still coast no she's still driving around she was running for governor and the recall election

Second time She got more governor. She pointed out. She got more governor. She got more governor. She steve you pointed out. She did. So anyway, yeah. So while Erica and the makeup people are cracking up about the fact that her lip got messed up, which I don't see why this is funny, Rina FaceTime Sutton. And they're talking, like Sutton and Garsell and Rina are talking on FaceTime. And then Erica's talking like Sudden and Garcell and we're talking on FaceTime and then Eric is like

Who is yelling outside and then Preston her gay is like I think it's Garcell so Basically Garcell and Sudden are in the balcony right above Erica. So Garcell's like so Ranna What do you think about Erica last night? I mean it was a rebirth, right? And when it's like oh my god, it has been such a long time since joyous Erica has come out. I mean, what a gift, what a blessing, what a miracle. Jesus coming out of a virgin vagina in a barn, miracle. I just have my body. I just have my body. I just have my body.

So yeah, they're like acting like this is the most amazing, wonderful thing that has ever happened. And Sun's like, well, I've never even really seen this side of her before. And Eric is like, are they talking about me? Are they talking about me? And then Garza is like, she's's like hey, hey, I'm allegedly I'm standing on the allegedly up here. All right, it's Erica. I can hear everything you're saying about me I can hear your fucking ass is right now you got them by the fucking ass folks. All right, but not be saying bad shit about me Listen to her. Oh my god. How joyous

Listen to her. Oh my god. How joyous. That was so good. Amazing. Eric again. You just vocally turned water into wine. Seriously, look at my water bottle. It's full of wine. Eric! Miracle! So then we go over to the pool, the hotel pool, for float fit, which is basically yoga on

these paddle boards, paddle board things, for float fit, which is basically yoga on these like paddle boards, thing, paddle board things, floaty things. And Crystal arrives in like a bathroom and she has a bathing suit under and Rina's there in like workout clothes. And Crystal's like, oh fuck you, Rina. You told me I'm in a bathing suit and you're in workout clothes, fuck you. Um, yeah, I'm in Garsell, Garsell and Sutton come out and make fun of them and heckle them while they're trying to concentrate on standing on a paddle board doing yoga on

a paddle board. And Rina has a very emotional, by the way, I just want to say Rina has a very emotional moment because it's the first time all season that someone has joined her in an activity. It hurts. It hurts to be alone all the time. It hurts. It hurts to be alone all the time. Ah! It hurts. So then Kyle is talking to Erica and Kyle's, they're talking about pickleball because they're gonna play the dreaded pickleball.

Oh, I've blown Teddy Melon's can for the whole fucking sport. This is Teddy's fault, okay? And Kyle of course manages to brag about their wealth while talking about pickleball. She was even though my husband wants to build a pickleball court, which implies the wealth to do that and the land to do that. She was like, I'm a terrible pickleball player, which means they're also kind of just like building a pickleball court just to build a pickleball court.

I guess Mauricio will play it. We figured Kyle, we've seen what you do to the interiors of your house with millions of dollars, okay? We figured Kyle we've seen what you do to the interiors of your house with millions of dollars, okay? We figured we figured your copying you're building a copy of a tennis court Of course a reductive copy A better smaller version of a tennis court the net is a better and smaller house Do you think that her neon art is the neon art artists that Tom and Tom want to emulate in their rest?

Doesn't matter. So now they just, they hit the ball back and forth across this net. And then finally, they start drinking champagne. I don't know why I wrote this down, but Erica drinks the champagne. It goes, uh. Yes.

So thanks for being my friend, ho. Erica, like Erica's whole life, I'm fun and light. It's just saying, fucking calling everybody hoes all the time. That's how Erica shows the lighter side of her personality. Well, because she just gets it from like her makeup squad. Like, I think that they just give her the personality and then she regurgitates it, right? Yeah, so then basically more yoga, more yoga,

and then they start talking about safe words. And it's like, can I try those glasses, Sutton? And Garsell is saying her safe word is pineapple, because there are pineapple sunglasses, right? And so then they start talking about their safe words, and crystals like Cartier or something. And Sutton goes, my safe word is stop. talking about their safe words and crystals like Cartier or something and um, Simon goes, my safe word is stop.

Um, and so, written as I say, hey, Sutton, hey, Sutton, Erica was talking to you last night. I can't believe she interrupted her 10 minute set, which was hilarious. Call it up for Netflix. Comedy's by the way, Erica Jen. She stopped her set to talk to you. How did you feel? It's like well, I was surprised. I hope that door is cracked. You know, I just don't know the angle of her door You know what what's the angle is it is it a trap door? Is it a just regular?

Is it a grocery store door that you're gonna walk close to and suddenly it swings open and before you know You're hit with a wave of cold air and feel like you're gonna. Thank they really shouldn't do that to people like me It's gonna be a triggering air conditioning or door. I need to know what the angle of her door is before I can say. So then we come back to Erica and to Kyle drinking champagne on the pickleball court and Erica goes, you know, I'm feeling better.

Yeah, can't wallow. Life goes on. I'm like, you're literally drinking champagne on like a, in a luxury hotel on a pickleball court. Like, I think life has gone on. That you drove to in your rain driver, your brand new round. So she's like,

Well, I read this morning that taking his house and they want to victim, but you know, girl, listen, I have zero dollars. All right, by the time they are done there will be nothing and I'm gonna walk with nothing she's like oh my god and she goes well I said I don't I told my lawyer I said I don't expect anything and the lawyer said that is the most courageous thing I've ever Yeah, he said it that slowly because his ass is charging you by the hour. Okay.

So speed it up. I know. Wow, Erica, inspiring, courageous. And Kyle says, well, nobody wants to see themselves with nothing, but obviously this is too awesome. I, of course, you would never take to Erica's face. But obviously the victims here are the ones that need to be paid the money. Okay, I finally said it. I got it on the air. Okay, so you can't use it against me.

I said it too. I said it too. So then back with the other ladies, Crystal's talking about how she's turning 37. They're saying they're going to get a restripper. And then Garsell's like, well, I have a question. Have you ever been with the girl? And that's what we call the real real. All right. And she's like, um, come on and she didn't want answers. So they make fun of her like, oh my god, you've been

with the girl. And then she starts lap dancing, Garcell. Yeah. And so now it's two thirty sudden goes, talk about violating. Yeah. So then two thirty p.m. Kathy comes out of her room and she's like, oh, I wonder what the temperature is. I'm gonna put a finger outside to feel it. So she's like, basically sticks her finger out the window to see how warm it's gonna be. Because they're going on a boat trip and it's not just any boat trip, Ryan. It's a boat trip with a private chef and that private chef is known as.

Brian Malarkey. Hi. Hey. Hey. Brian Malarkey. What's up? Guess what I'm going to do. I'm going to give you seafood like you have never seen seafood before. Get ready ladies. Buckle in even though we're just on about. Hey, I know I got to wear a mask, but here's what you can do. Imagine Meredith Marks. But give her a short hair. Here I am. Brian Malarkey. I'm Meredith Marks with really, really frosted tips. Okay. You're gonna love it.

So, let's see, the fire is still hot. Kathy just left the fire running all night, which is so her. You know, there's a point where it's like, Ha, ha, ha, ha, until you're with somebody like Kathy. Yeah. Well, you know, one time, I was on a trip with girls, and I burnt down the entire hotel and killed everybody But you know, I do love to sleep with the fan online people like

Well the fan prevents far as far as you know, so then Then we see like this random footage of the women in the lobby and Kyle is she's like looking at I don't know someone's look or whatever and she's walking and then Garsell almost runs into her and Gar she's like looking at, I don't know, someone's looking at whatever, and she's walking, and then Garsell almost runs into her, and Garsell's like, you know, you're not the only person the world call Richards, if you stop, there might be someone behind you. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. But I actually rewound it, and Kyle came to a very normal stop,

and I was Garsell who was not paying attention. So I have to give, I have to give Kyle credit, she had a normal stop. This is Gar, this was on Garsell. I'm sorry, I watch the footage All right glad you got that on the record Yeah, so in Erica and Sutton are walking together. They're going towards the boat and Erica's like all the set She's in this like pink like fun

I'm a fun girl. Bye. It's like It's just like inspired by Tutsi. It was like weird It was a weird, like, hey, I'm in a 1977 spa drama, I'm about to have a rendezvous with someone on a bench, but first let me talk to the sun. Yeah, it's very Angeline again. It's very like Angeline Maghiver type of outfit.

So she's like, oh honey, you know, I just have to say it's been run. I don't think so much I can't predict. You might know, this wasn't me, I'm in a high voice today. That means I'm gonna be nice to you. I'm looking a little down, I know, I'm sitting on it. What? Yeah, and Sun goes, oh, I know, I'm sorry.

And Eric goes, it's okay, I'll get through it. But I had to lash out and apologize. And it's like, no, you don't have to apologize to me. Eric, even Sutton starts kissing the butt. The second she gets some of that, whatever this is, the Erica gives them. I don't get it. But that's not kissing ass.

That's just being, that's just like being, oh, don't you, but don't worry, don't worry. You know, she's just trying to avoid the situation. Oh, no, because this whole episode, she's like, after this part, when Erica starts being nice, she's immediately like, well, you know, I would never wanna hurt anybody and there's something that Erica gives these people

which I don't really get. So she's like, well I had to lash out, but the good part is we can keep going forward. She's like, well, you're just too pretty to be mad at me. And so sudden is like Erica's giving me a mild apology and I just don't trust it I want to but I don't and so Erica says you know, I'm I still mean all the nice things I say it about you and I'll take you know it'll take me a minute

But I mean all the nice things and it cuts the producers at what kind of her telling us like do I want to work it out with sudden? No, no, I don't know Here's the thing I. He is a thing. I don't want to ruin it for everyone because I hate Sutton. I'm like, that's fine. But like, don't like, don't like bang us over the head as part of the open and honest army, okay? Yeah. And so, uh, why did I push you away? It's funny. The change in her voices. Because to Sutton, she's talking about about these I'm sitting with my friends again. Look at that. I was so crazy.

And then the coast you're a diary room. She's like, no, I don't want to fucking be afraid. Well, something in the mouth. What are you talking about? Fucking kill that bitch. So then we meet Captain Troy and the women are getting hunted this boat and son can't get up the ladder because she has a messed up foot and she's like unwilling to like grab the sides of the thing and hoist up her foot to the

next rung. So, like, all these people are trying to kind of like push her over, it looks like a survivor challenge where you just have like some giant, like bag full of heavy puzzle pieces you got put over a wall. So, everyone just has to get something. You've got to get a sack of aging, you know, rich white lady over a wall. You know, we've seen it a million times. And I like that one of the employees is like, oh, your foot hurts.

Okay. And she's like, start grabbing for Sutton's wrapped foot. It's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, not there, not there. Okay. That's the broken part. Okay. Want to do it? You're on the lake.

So they finally get on the boat and everything. And they are taking photos of themselves, but only half of them are in the good light. So the captain starts rotating the boat around, so they could all have the good light. And then there was like a bunch of women who were like hoisting up the sales, or he was like, well, look at these women.

These are some bow-ass chicks right there. Yeah, up these women. These are some bow-ass chicks right there. Yeah, up with women. So Doreet, of course, these people can't do anything without trying to get Erica to do everything. I know we're hard on Erica a lot, but God, you guys do something on your own. Like, every single scene you have to bring up Erica and trying to get Erica to fight about something.

Do you something yourselves, you lazy fuckers? So they all sit down and do it's like, I saw Erica and satin token. What was that about? And something's like, I'll let her tell it. So I don't get my goddamn face eating off. Okay, Erica. Go take it away, Erica. It's like, it was the place, I'm saying I'm hard. My life is in shambles, but you know when the coup by y'all you know what word? I've learned recently and I love Come by y'all I'm gonna say it about 30 times and in five minutes, all right I'm in a good mood the moment was right and she was receptive and

Kathy's like and that makes you feel better or doesn't it yeah So then Kyle Kyle's saying you know, the thing is with Erica, you just don't know. She could snap and then it's fine. Which is funny because this is the same kind of card that she was playing with Denise all last season. Remember, like leading up to their big following out, all season long, she's like, you never know with Denise. She's so crazy.

She might lose her mind over anything. So now Kyle is starting to play that cover, the Erica, which is fun. But in this case, it's completely on the nose, right? Cause that is how Erica's had 10 different personalities today alone. So Erica's like, well, you know, ladies, I'm a good time, ain't I?

I just want to have a good time. But there's so many people looking at me. I mean, if I fun, I'm not robustful. If I don't hang my head and shine, they hate me for that. And if I do hang my head, they say I'm just acting. You know what it's like? I mean, do you know what it is? Like to read about yourself and people, baggles,

leave everything or waste later. Yeah, I'm gonna say this. Everyone wants you to say, God, I feel terrible. The poor victims, I think Erika's lawyers, have told her that you can't say anything because all of a sudden you're connected to it. So that's why she's not talking about the victims.

There, I made my statement about the victims. I'm done, I'm done, I did my part. So Chris was like, look, I just wanna say, don't wanna interrupt, but I just wanna talk to Satan. Chris was like, Satan, she's like, yeah. She's saying it as if Satan's part of, she's saying it like it's a say on, it's Satan here, I'd like to Sutton, she's like, yeah. I just sang it as if Sutton's part of it. She's saying it like it's a say on it. It's Sutton here.

I'd like to talk to Sutton, because someone... So, the Sutton in the room. She's like, Sutton, I just wanted to say, I've had a really hard time with you forgiving you. I never wanted to forgive you Sutton, but Sutton, I have forgiven you. I have been having a good time with your memory. Go towards the light Sutton I have forgiven you I have been having a good time with your memory go towards the light

I Go towards the light. I release you from this terrestrial torment You can now continue on to the light. You are released your burden is released So Eric goes well, that's honest and Sut goes, well, I am also fun, okay? And Kathy goes, Kathy goes school and all. So then, Crystal Husts, yeah. And they're not fighting anymore, even though I thought they already weren't

already fighting anymore. But it was like, we've already made up, but now I don't hate you. I know, it was kind of a funny way to start it. Like, honestly, I really hated your guts. I really never wanted to forgive you. I know it was kind of a funny way to start it like honestly I really hated your guts I really never wanted to forgive you I I thought of all the dinner parties I could have where I could say that bitch Sutton and be all laugh but damn it I'm having a good time with you. So they make up and then Garsell pulls the rid of I have a game two truths and a lot or what is it?

I have a game I don't know if you've heard about it. It's called Never Have I Ever Ever and it goes, Oh, I watched the play that did. I'm like, don't you guys play this game literally every episode? Am I crazy? So that's what I'm saying. Okay, it's definitely time for the finale. Just to go on guys. Just end it. Okay, pull the curtain. So Kathy's like, well, I did a background check on everybody here. So there's nothing. I don't know I'm everybody laughs, but she's like I know all the secrets The Garsell goes but to Garsell's credit she gets right to it she goes, okay

Never have I ever stolen anything. And everybody just, and of course the cameras, you know that every camera on that boat were like, you stole like straight to Erica. And Erica's like, Sidney's super expensive glasses. She pushes up her glasses like, me. Of course knowing that that was meant for her and she and her in her Confessionals she's like, you know what say it about say it. I don't like that shit. Never ever stolen anything really Neither of our pitch neither of us like whoa. I was like, whoa, she's really mad. Like, she starts like she's running a radio station in hell. And then Dorita's hilarious.

She goes, well, I'm sure I'm trying to steal something, you know, when I was a kid. Like, gee, I might have accidentally stole something. So I'll just drink so that way if someone later or anything does come out, I'm drunk. I'm taking a spot for you. I'm just gonna drink it. She's, I've never stolen it. Come on, Doreet. It's, her name is Beverly Beach, ma'am, okay? So, Erica then goes, you know, I've learned a one thing.

No admission is no admission. I'm like, Erica, we're not talking about USC, okay, and that scandal, okay, we're talking about you right now. And so I'm like, no admission is no admission. Okay. And Rina's like, okay, I've got another one. No, no. What is no admission is no, it makes no sense. I need to know. Is a college admission? I don't get it. So Rina is like, okay, never have I ever ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha It's like, Sutton Stratk! Sutton Stratk! Cause Sutton, uh, Sutton Drink. And when it goes, no, no Sutton!

If you've had anal sex, then you have to drink. And Garth's like, oh, she did drink! And they all start cracking up. And then the moment we've all been waiting for, Hello, ladies! We have some amazing bluefin tuna caught locally. And we have some crispy rice, and we have some crispy rice and we have some right some kimchi vinaigrette and this one that we have is duck and fig so we are going to enjoy this right now.

Thank you everyone. I'm going to go watch some Wii television. That's my new cell on Wii. So Jere is like, forgive us Troy Captain Troy for anything you're hearing. Never have I ever had six. And of course Carl Sips and she's like and the worst part it was a commercial flight It was a commercial flight not even a private jet that's hopefully still to come because we have a private jet now But you know, of course we have the pickleball court that we're building first on our land. So. Okay. Never have I ever had sex in a doctor's office.

Kathy and she's like, drinks basically just becoming the confession show. So whoever wants to talk about doing anal or fricking in a doctor's office, now's your time to bring it at. Yeah. And they just, I mean, it just keeps going. It's like, wants to talk about doing anal or fricken in a doctor's office, now's your time to bring it up. Yeah, and they just, I mean, it just keeps going. It's like, you know, Garsell never have I ever strapped on and did another man. I was like, no, but I would do it at the upper 30% of it itself. And they're just like talking, you know, the captain is like laughing. You know, he wants to join in too. she's just says Erica Garsell is like well You know, I guess if you love him you could do it. She's a hook. I don't need to love him

I just need to be down that I need someone to shut their fucking mouth and I'm good my problem is shut the fuck up Shut up Yeah, she gets to a crazy place. She's like, yeah, I just think I want to shut the fuck up. You know what? Shut the fuck up. That's my problem. Shut the fuck up. She's looking at Sutton and Sutton's like, uh, okay. You know what we're talking about? Strapons right now, right? Erica switches to this crazy place and just keeps going my problem. You want to know my problem? Shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up shut the fuck up. Don't say I don't even know you

Don't say I don't even know you so it's like now she's screaming at Sutton again But nobody understands how this shifted So they just all kind of stare at her and Sutton tells us this is a bit much But Erica always has an underlying scary part to her. And honestly, I'd have a rage too if I lost all my money. So then they just start like focusing on the sailing part of this. And I was like, look, San Diego. Oh my God. Look at San Diego. That's part of where in Australia, that's part time we're in Australia. That's part time we're in Australia. Yeah. So then, the three of the women go to sit on the bow,

almost like this pole, which I never would do. And then, Kathy and son are talking, and Kathy, most of them go to hell that chat, you know, get that monkey off your back. There's a monkey on my back. Oh, there's a monkey on the back. I call it Erica,

she is so vindictive, but a monkey's on my back. You know, I'm just glad she opened up. And, kind of, I mean, look, we have so much in common with our dance background and being from Georgia. I just I just is hard for me. This is hard for me.

I hate having friends, friends like this. This has been so hard for me. Like okay, Sutton with your fucking lady tier. Stop with your tiers all the time Sutton. Okay, this is you who started this shit with Erica. And now you're gonna see her cry about it. Like, pick a lane. Yeah, exactly.

Like, I feel like once you go down this path with Erica, you just commit to knowing that she's not gonna be your friend anymore, and you just go for it, right? So, you know, she's like, I can't not ask questions. And then finally, the episode ends. We're like, how do we get this far with a boat without someone saying, I'm a king of the world! Oh god, I read for that part.

But I didn't get it. They wanted me to be in steerage and I said, no way I'm doing days. Oh. I've still got my audition dress in the garage Sometimes I get on the boat and I throw Harry's bull and he's in the water and I pretend it's Titanic I just got a thank you card from Moby Dick love Terry sauce And that was the end of the episode so next week next, the grand finale, we're gonna see what happens,

and then we have four episodes of reunion. It's gonna be pretty intense. I don't know if it's gonna be four weeks, or if they're gonna do something where they may be like, double up in a certain week. All I know is this could be a lot of work for us, but it'll be worth it. Yeah, well we'll see you then everybody.

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