Watch What Crappens - RHOC: Fashion Bullying

Episode Date: October 24, 2019

This episode is available in video form on Patreon as part of Crappens On Demand Real Housewives of Orange County shows us what an OC fashion show looks like, and it's terrifying. Kathy the model director loses her shit and becomes an instant classic, so there's that! This week's premium bonus takes place in a rental car on our last road trip. To hear it and all bonuses, become a member over at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. ***New Limited Edition Shirts! "Shannon Bowldor" merch available at crappensmerch.com! **Crappens Live is coming to Atlanta (early and late show), Chapel Hill, Richmond, Tampa, Ft Lauderdale, Indianapolis, Chicago (early and late show), NYC, St Louis, Philadelphia, Denver, Seattle, Los Angeles (The Crappies), Detroit, Columbus, Austin (late show added!) and Houston! Find ticket links at watchwhatcrappens.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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That's a t-shirt game Shannon with a bow on her head. Oh, this T-shirt gave me a concussion. We've got a couple of Kelly shirts to say twerp and dork respectively and when Bifke is you Sally, I mean when Bifke is you talk to me, you talk to Sally, okay? It's Cameron Westcock quote, so I don't want talking like this. Also today we're doing this on Crappens on Demand, so we're on video. We can see each other. Yeah, you could have just seen me take a giant gulp of coffee right here on video. You see it happening live. And look, I'm going to share everybody my gorgeous microphone. Do you see that? No, it's actually blurred. I see your thumb.

Oh, because the background splurred on sky. Never mind. Just trust me. Yeah, that was a really thing. What does this visual delights that crap in on demand viewers get to see. Yeah, big blurry nothing. So that's also why I'm hunched over like Gina today in this recap. Listen, Ronnie, I will not stand for that anti bullying. I mean, that bullying, I'm hashtag hashtag anti bullying, hashtag anti bullying. Hashtag assault. What an episode of Real housewives of Orange County

I mean we're very lucky people to be able to do this today. I know my cousin Melissa texted me last night and was like I have a feeling let's see her exact quote. She said She said she basically was like I have a feeling that this, she says, I'm calling it now, this OC fashion show is going to be something you guys do as a classic episode podcast in the future. Oh, for sure. Well, for sure, this lady, this crazy lady, Shannon Doherty with Beastings, you know, it's like Shannon Doherty went and punched a fuck out of a, out of the wrong beanass, Beast

Hive. And the sad thing is I was actually on this lady's side for like the first like half of her moment, but then she really, she really went berserk, but we're gonna get to that because it was just so perfectly hilarious. Well, we know what else was in store today, so I'd like to thank the producers

for at least giving us that to laugh about because it opens with previously's and they bring up Ryan again. So we know it's gonna be a fucking Ryan episode with his wants to kill trans people, ass. Fuck you, Ryan. Ryan, let's just have a little bit of the nice fuck you. Yeah, Ryan, the real victim in America.

You just didn't have the same chances, guys. Guys, he didn't have the toolbox that showed him how to be an adult, how to live live. He just didn't have that toolbox. So let's give him something. Guys, let's just all take a moment to say I'm sorry to White straight man in America. I know that it's the hardest on you. Yeah.

White straight men who are given jobs by their stepfathers and. Sounds so money by their stepfathers. It's not like I'm married into a shit ton of money so they got to be raised with money and be spoiled a little fuckers. And now we're taking like, they're the star and like the fucking amy remake shot for Ion. You know, a mom who's been on television

for 10 plus years, you just never really got a break in life. You know, I'm sorry. I'm so really got a break in life, you know? I'm sorry. I'm so hard. That's all like, have a moment. Let's have a vigil. I can't like vigil for his hair. Yeah, so for his hair.

Yeah, that is sad now. OK, so now on the other hands, OK? Hate Ryan, you know, Hopi falls off the mountain. But man, you know what? Balding people, I think everywhere watching this, we're like, oh, because we see Ryan in his full beard and it's like full like chips,

slash Trump, American hat through the whole thing. And then he's like, do I have to take off my hat to get surgery on my skin or whatever. And then it's like gross, you look disgusting, whether you're garbage, you know, your garbage change. And then he does like cut his hair and clean up

for the die room session. And it's like, oh no, it's like a makeover show that just doesn't work, you know. It's like there's no happening. They try to make him over. But it's like when you see those hairless cats and you're like, oh, it's weird. No, cause there's someone somewhere that's like,

oh my god, air was pants. But I don't think that anybody's doing that with Ryan. No, I guess he's probably not like a hairless cat. He's almost like a few, maybe like a, well first of all, the cat implies like a certain base level of cuteness. It's always right. And intelligence. And intelligence.

And intelligence. And intelligence. So like, maybe like a, what's hard to think of an animal that's not cute like realistically what's like a well? I mean even possums are cute now. I guess everybody's been posting us cute possum, baby. He's like a hairless bat hairless bat That's don't really do anything. No, some people really like bats actually. He's just a Ryan. Okay. He's a Ryan There's no other animal that needs to be like solid with the Ryan name. I know. I feel bad.

This is the first one I felt bad for like all the animals. As I'm like going through my planet Earth, I'm like, let's see, there's that animal and that. How about a hairless walrus, maybe? Oh, what? You're gonna just a walrus or I never talked about being about being bald? I'm a walrus. I'm also a walrus, okay? I know. I was just trying to think of anything. Anything I could possibly come up with, but I can't think of anything else. It's a disgusting piece of trash.

How about that? He's just trash. Okay, so here we are. We start on bikes. Okay, I did not have a lot of hopes for this episode. We start with Ryan Previous Lees and then bikes. No. Yeah, so it opens up with Bronwyn

and Kelly, um, writing some electric bikes and, uh, just like, it's one of these like fun silly scenes where they basically are like, uh, getting on bikes. Well, we get to see what's happening all across Orange County. So they're like, so they're playing with bikes. And then we see them on bikes where we basically see people on bikes. Yeah, I was like, you're just scrolling through notes and sing bike to the bike. Yeah, that's all I'm saying. I'm like, toward a, toward a not France. To order underpants. So, um, so then we see Shane teaching his, uh, son, how to stir a pot, which is, you know, I guess that counts

his fatherhood. That's a big move on his on this part. Yeah, because we learned today that he's like the best father in the world. Yeah. And then also Eddie and Tamra are having a moment. Like Eddie, really, one of the biggest and brightest personalities on the show, asking Tamra, are you really going to play tennis? Tennis studies the brand stimulates the brand.

It's like, thanks Eddie. Thanks for that. Like insightful. Thanks for that tennis knowledge, Eddie. Yeah. Thanks for dropping that. I'm like, yeah, wait a make tennis boring. Eddie, yeah, you're killing tennis for me.

But so then we have Bronman and Kelly again, my bike, bike, bike. So this, these are like those electro bikes like you said and Bron was like it's like a mobed but better and Kelly's like well yesterday me I took Brian and his son on and it's gonna be bros birthday I want to get Brian a boy you know okay so by the way they go to a store called PetAGo. I don't know. I feel weird about stores that have the same prefix and the same rhythm as pedophile.

PetAGo, pedophile. It sort of makes me feel uncomfortable. It's like a pedophile with low time. You're an area. It doesn't have a ton of time. It's like a pedophile who needs to do things quickly. Like pedigo. I was going to say it's a pedophile who has trouble peeing.

Pedigo. Gotta go. Go, pedigo. Pedigo. I've been waiting for you to go pee! For like two hours! This is where my mind's at right now. I'm making jokes about the Slavic nature of words that remind me of the word, Patta Files.

Patta go, fine. Patta go, bikes and petta files. Welcome to this day. We're gonna get sued by that guy. And you know what? You know what? He deserves this because he is like, she's like, how much does it cost?

And he's like $12,000. But how can you put a price on fun? Like be quiet. She costs $200 at most. Yeah, that's disgusting. Although I do like the fact that he's taking like exercise and putting batteries in it. Because I would, I would get anything like that. Like a bike that you don't have to pedal or like one of those machines,

an elliptical machine and you could just like turn it on and just watch it go from the bed, you know? Like that. But you still sort of have to semi-paddle this bike. So it's like, it's not quite as effortless as maybe a scooter, but like not without the exercise benefits of a bike. So it's just like, you know, classic pedigo.

And by the way, it only cost $4,400. He was joking. Joking, yeah, like this, that's supposed to make it sound better. That now we can be passing off. Hasels still set. Still 4,000 is like a lot. Like I would think 500 most, honestly.

I mean, I, yeah, like I feel like the base bike costs 200. And then you put like a little battery on it. That's another $200, then you know, $50 markup. Base bike. That's because you before that's the base bike. Base bike is pedagos Fred because it's just like bike, but it's like base, you know, it's like really dirty. Okay, so Braun, Braun win.

I was like, there was a stop sign. Just feel free to ignore it. So they're like wacky. Okay, I don't care. Let's scroll past because there's a better stuff to be had here then But by the way if I would really like if I were driving around and I saw a tandem bicycle go by with Kelly Dodd and Brahman on it I would I would like be cracking up like that is a sight So now we go to the laser way hair removal because Tampa can only shoot and some kind of a doctor's

office. It's like the only place she could shoot or a strip mall restaurant. So, well, I guess she was in the closet earlier. Nevermind theory dead. Okay, so tamar is taking ride. That's right. There's also work. Yeah. She's taking ride to remove some tattoos. And he is wearing two different American flag options. He's got a shirt that's an American flag and he's wearing a hat that has an American flag on it. Too much, too much. Like in general, like the rule is,

like if you're gonna wear some sort of like merch, you do like one. Like you don't go, you don't go to a Beyonce concert and we're a Beyonce t-shirt and then a Beyonce hat. I mean, I guess people probably would do it. That's a bad example. Beyonce is different. But like, if you go to different, yeah, I know I feel like you can be as extra as you

wanted a Beyonce concert. But if you were going to like a Yankees game, anywhere Yankees cap, any Yankees, like Jersey or shirt, like I get it, but also you're not a baseball player. So like, choose one. player. So like choose one. I just feel like choose one. You don't need to, you don't need to double up. Okay. And that's just how I do it.

Well, it's also just like a recent thing where suddenly people are huge patriots, you know, because it's like, and we get into it. We'll get into that discussion as we go, but it's like suddenly, oh, really? I never saw you wear an American flag. So you're only a patriot now, right? It's like in the past. Oh, I don't know, threeish years, you're suddenly like, oh wow, I just love flags suddenly. Yeah, exactly.

I guess you can further and further into the middle of nowhere, you see more flags on every house. It's like, you know, there's like one in like a normal neighborhood and then there's two and another. And then there's like a flag, you know, flag stickers on cars and the house and then there's like, it's like, it's like, did you buy a boat to put in the front of your house just to put some flag flags on it? We get it. You're better Americans.

And also people get people are people get so mad justifiably so when others burn the American flag. So where's the outrage that he's wearing an American flag t-shirt? I mean, he has a literal dumpster fire and he's wearing the flag. Okay, where is the outrage from America? Okay. You're not supposed to solely the American flag. Yeah, exactly. We're not supposed to. Okay, people get mad when there's like an American flag, like underwear or something like that. Like, that's the flag. Well, guess what? Ryan is wearing the flag. Where is the outrage? I'm outraged. I'm outraged. Also, since we're talking about America and American things, this text just came in as we're talking from my friends Neelan Nate. They're

very fancy and they're at the IV as we speak. And they took a spy photo because none other than Juliet of ladies of London is sitting behind them. So if you're watching grabs on demand, you can see a photo of Juliet eating her lunch next to a bouquet of roses. She needs to not be on crap. I mean, she needs that needs to not be a spy photo. That needs to be a high photo like hi. My name is no. And I have a podcast also I'm loaded. I'm like legitimately let it. Hey, do you want to be friends with another rich person? I wonder if she's sitting with Marissa Harmer because she's opening up a new restaurant in Hollywood. She's apparently this photo of Juliet.

She is spreading something with a butter knife onto like a toast. I think she has like a dip or something like that. She's having a lovely lunch. And it just is exciting to know that there's a lady of London here in town. Oh man. America. You see there are good. There are great things.

You know, stop, stop selling our flag. Ryan. Yeah. Ryan. A lot are great things. You know, stop, stop, stop selling our flag. Ryan. Yeah. Yeah, Ryan. A lot of great things here. Juliet. And the Ivy. Juliet. So, um, yeah. So, Tamra's like, when did you get so petriotic batch?

It's like, America's always in style, mom. I'm like, really like, yes, America is always in style. Ra, ra, ra, but I don't need to hear fashion advice from Ryan. Yeah, so he is yeah, because he's not only wearing the hat. He takes off his jacket and it's a full it's not just a shirt with a flag on it. It's made out of a flag. Yeah, he's like going to a radio or something. Yes.

I got a radio of flags. So she says one flag trying to ride another flag and not get thrown off. There are, there's like a bearded flag. Oh, no, that's the carnival. Sorry. No one ever told me how to be a flag. So I thought you meant by bearded flag or type out, Ryan. No, I was talking about the carnival.

I was just getting anything I don't like doing outdoors as a child with my family. That's not sports. I don't know. I was I was grouping in the wrong thing. Anyway. So she's like, I got that you want to support the past tense. Like, you're in a Trump call. Like, are we going to pretend that Tamar is like super liberal now

because she's getting a lot of shit on Twitter because bitch, I'm not going to fly. Okay, stop. Yeah, this was a really hard thing for me to process because then Tamer gets on screen and goes, I personally never liked Trump as a person. I don't like his bedside manner as if what she's like sorted with him. I don't like the way what he says about women. And I don't like a lot of things about him. Okay. And I'm like, this is

really weird because like Tamer and I are agreeing on something here and I felt like really strange. But I also felt like the way... That's so weird, but that's not fair. You don't feel bad about yourself. It's like finding someone who's like, guess what? I don't like to drink poison.

It's like, oh my god! I also had a sneaking suspicion that she was saying this stuff is still voted for him, you know, because she was like, I personally never like Trump as a person. And I was like, I thought that she like qualified that. I was like, is that like her way of like saying, but I was a politician has, yeah. Oh, oh, I see. I wasn't sure. Or maybe she was just saying it to be like the like, so she doesn't get pushed back from like people, like conservative fans of her that are like, but he's the best. And she's like, no, just has that person.

Either way, I just don't like him as a person, because I love them as Peppa. So have you noticed that Tamara now has permanent mascara coming down her face? It wasn't only in the scene, it was in her testimonials too. And I was like, how is that? She, I'm sure she wipes her face. Lord knows she shall accident. That, you know, she buffers that fucker. But I realize is because she's put so much filler in her face. And she keeps getting it enough. You know she buffers that fucker. But I realize it's because she's put so much filler

in her face and she keeps getting it done. She's an addict and so she's got a crater coming down her eyes. It's like a constant tear, especially down this side, which is this the right one. So be careful out there. Be careful with what you're putting in your face, okay? And make sure before you leave that they like put their palms against your face and mash it all out, okay? Don't just trust it to fall into place. It's not natural, it doesn't. You don't want to have no. Constant tears.

Yeah, constant mask guarantees. Constant tears. Well, Tamara goes, you know, I don't like Donald Trump as a person, but I can't judge my son by his love of Donald Trump. I'm like, guess what, we can, we can, and we do. We do. Well, there are plenty of other reasons to judge your son.

Get on it. Do you need to make me an alternate list for you? We don't even have to, like, we don't even have to bring this into politics. We know that we have lots of conservative listeners too, and we understand that. But you know what, we can make this very apolitical. We will judge him by every other thing and he still fails.

Yeah, still fails. How about you just don't threaten to kill trans people, or, you know, like a cheer on the killing of trans people? That would be great, okay? Yeah, how about you just don't threaten to kill trans people or you know like a cheer on the killing of trans people That would be great. Yeah. Yeah. How much just all agree on that across the political aisles you fucker so right she's like So why did you get that tattoo on your neck and I cannot believe it was something like you know money on my mind. Well, I thought it was gonna be be, I just was hoping that it was something like, hey, love, love everybody or it's like a peace sign or something, but he's like, get yourself

on me. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. It was something like that. It's appropriate that Ryan actually wants to disassociate himself with money. Like whatever ambition he used to have, money on my mind, he's like not even, not even settling. He's like, basically at this point, it's just like a chicken wing on his mind. I get a chicken wing there instead. Yeah. Well, I would just be like a side

of blue cheese. I'll see back there. Could you imagine? Oh, God, remember that hidden valley ramps that people were sending around last season of Vanderpump rules? Delicious. Okay. So money on my mind. He's like, yeah, but you know, sometimes you just want to get stuff covered up It's like I know you're talking to a woman like putting melted Pepsi bottles in her face. She gets it So she's like I wasted my back. I got it What did she have on her back? What was she? What did she get later off? I forget. I feel like she just had like a Giants Colonel Sanders back there

Like horns actual horns coming out. I got my back sounded down She used to have like the the prison break like prison Blueprints back there except that it wasn't a prison. It was like the fashion island ball Okay, yes, how we get in and how we get out So next up I shouldn't should the fashion island mall directory on her back. It's like pointing you towards the chick filet. It would. It would. So anyway, so now it's time for tattoo removal. So we call upon reality TV's go to tattoo removal person who's been on many of

these shows, including I believe we saw him on Vinter from rules and just various other ones, but for those who are real reality TV purists, we know him as one of the best players. Big brother is Dr. Will. Okay. Dr. Will. Okay. Thursday is ever. He's like, okay, I'll come in and be on your scene and you know,

he probably shot 12 hours of that just talking and giving advice, strategy plans. And it was just so funny because Dr. Will, you know, he is very well preserved. I mean, he looks essentially the exactly the same except his hair now has actually like a very sexy gray streak in it, you know. So he's there in his like designer suit, his skin is just like basically like a like a wax apple or something like that, but like super white and he's in there and he's like ready to zap Ryan and or something like that, but like super white. And he's in there and he's like ready to zap Ryan. And Ryan is sitting there in his like American flag shirt with a scraggly beard just looking like he spent

the last five years in the back of a dump truck. And just a juxtaposition of like shiny glamorous Dr. Will and then just like miserable, crusty Ryan. Yeah. Cracked me up. It's like miserable crusty Ryan. Yeah, cracked me up. It's like preserved, preserved hints. Yeah, I know. It's like both of those things.

This is your brain and this is your brain on Tamra. Yeah. So Tamra's like, oh, any questions. So Tamra's like, I've been worried about you, man. But I haven't been stopped to make sure you're okay. I was like, oh, yeah, well, it's understandable. There's cameras here now, Tamra. Yeah camera just going from mother of the year. And he's like, you know, I've been up and down. And this is where he tells us, you know, what

really pisses me off about my life is like, I never got the building blocks to life, you know? No one helped me set up for the future. You were fucking loaded. Okay. Yeah. You're a spoiled, a bullying alley're two in their life, okay? Well, their mom was at waiting tables, okay? The point is, she eventually hooked you up in a mansion and you fucked it all up by being a prick. So shut up, you're gonna send my poor for a second story about it.

Exactly, exactly. It's not our fault that you impregnated a lady you met on Instagram, okay? That's not our fault, okay? That's not being set up for life. You only got that girlfriend because you were on TV in the first place. Like that girl cruising around sliding into your DMs

on Instagram or whatever. You were, that is an opportunity that you majorly fucked up. Okay, they'll say the world hasn't given you opportunities. They gave you a beautiful wife and children. Yeah, exactly. You know, it's like, the sad part is that she is too good for you and she's the one who like slid into your DMs, which is that's okay. Yes.

And the thing is that like, he's talking about, oh, I didn't get the building blocks life. No one really does. Okay. Some people, you know, some people are privileged and they do get some stuff for sure. But like, no one ever knows really how to get through life. But the thing is you can either, but he had a lot of opportunities. And we know this because we see the scenes of Simon berating him over and over again,

including later in this episode. I'm like, I'm pretty sure I sat through a season of Simon saying, well, what you got to do in life is get a job and have responsibility. What you should be doing is this. What you should be doing is that. And he's like, those are called building blocks, Ryan. Don't get mad at me because you didn't listen

to your own season. Yeah, you knocked down your own blocks. Fuck her. Yeah. So Gina, speaking about somebody just knocking down their own blocks, I mean, Gina. OK. Also, I hope that this hair lady, what is her name?

It comes in later. I forget. I've just kept writing hair. OK. Hair lady. I just assume it's always Priscilla because she's like all the housewives here and makeup people. No, this one's different because I feel like Priscilla would be doing it as a joke, like, ha ha, look what I did to you. Hey, I stupid. Yeah. You know, so this is a girl who bleached genus hair. Now the internet has, well, the real house was internet has been going crazy over genus

hair the whole season. And it is hilarious that they actually showed her getting her hair done. And this lady the whole time is going, great, it looks amazing. Oh my God, your hair. I cannot believe we did this. It is stunning. I can't wait to hear what people think of your hair. When I graduate from beauty school, they will be so proud of me. Beautiful, proud.

First of all, it looked like she was putting mayonnaise in her hair. I felt like she was getting her scalp massaged with helmets. That would be a stop-up. They really look at their French fries in two-eighths. Actually, I actually think this. Like, when there was the initial reveal, I didn't think it looked so bad But I think the problem is that Gina also styles it terribly, you know So like she doesn't do herself any favors with that color I think if you're gonna wear that color you got to wear in a specific way and Gina does not know how to do that

I don't think it's the shade. I think it's I don't think it's the color I think it's more like the shade of the like desperation, you know I just heard it's when someone like, look, I got a sports card. Like, yeah, exactly. So, do you speak him sliding into it? You know, it's like me and like, a little Miata. Like, you know, you're like, when Harrison Ford got like a pierced ear and then started dating, close to a flock heart. It's like, you're 300 years old. Yeah. So anyway. You're a catalyst to flock cart. Harrison fords meata.

So Gina, she's like, oh my god, Dr. Hwadi slid into my DMs, OK? And I'm like, I'm fucking terrified that I replied to someone who's slid into my DMs. But what are you going to do? I'm like, you what, you know, you can't be so horrified by like the new way that life is. And on top of that, you're a celebrity now. So like, that is like your celebrity privilege is to have people slide into your DMs. Okay, so please enjoy that. Yeah, speaking of enjoying your privilege, that's yours.

I'm not sure, and I'm probably wrong and people will, I'm sure, tell me. But is he real? This Dr. Roddy? I was like, I said way too many times. He's like, Dr. Hottie is very George Glass. You know, it's like very Brady Bunch. My boyfriend George Glass sent me these flowers. I don't know that I'm buying it because I've never, I have never met this catfish.

Yeah. Oh, you think it's a catfish? Oh, yeah, because she's so catfishable, right? It's like, oh my god, his name is Dr. Haudi. That's actually his real name and he's a brain surgeon. And like, I haven't been able to FaceTime him yet because he's been Brunai and they don't have Wi-Fi and Brunai, but he says he loves me

and I believe him actually. So I don't know, things are going really well. Oh, do you know, yeah, this is making me kind of sick to my stomach. So she's like, oh my God, he's so funny. Like her, she's really up playing her accent. Wait, let me just say. He's really funny.

He makes me laugh and the hairstylist because oh my God, like a Jimmy Fallon kind of laugh. That's the go-to. Oh my god, he makes you laugh. Is he sort of like Jeff Foxworthy? They can't say Foxworthy that Fox. I mean, Jimmy Fallon's funny and everything. I've just never heard it. I've just never heard him in a...

I don't know. When you make it to the OC hairdressers, like comparison charts, it's time to retire, right? I don't even know who I would say. Like if someone said, oh, he's really funny and I'd be like, oh, funny? Like, I don't know who my male comedian go to would be because, are there any funny male comedians right now? You know, man, they're just not funny. any funny male comedians right now. You know, man, it's just not funny.

You know, like we make a we make a strong effort to prove that every top fellow is he like funny like Todd Phillips, one of the funny guys. I always say is he like funny like I don't know is he like Ruth Bader Ginsburg funny or is he. I like David. But I like David tell, but I feel like it would sound like, it's like not appetizing to be like, ooh, he's funny as you like a David's tell. I like, no, it's no.

So she's like, yeah, he's really funny. So she says, you know, it's like, I couldn't date, you know, because like, it's been hot for me the day because I got the kids, you know? And then when I don't, well, I guess I always have the, I guess I was married, actually, not that I think about it. I couldn't date because I was married. I mean, it didn't stop my husband.

Look at me, I'm funny too. I'm like a Judy gold. I think that's the way to advance for her. Because Judy gold is like a legit hysterical. She's more of a Judy. I'm a Judy. She's more way to advance for her. Because you know, I guess we're like lips in hysterical. She's more of a duty to new. No, Judy's new to was like way too rich. Caroline Ray. Not Caroline Ray.

Maybe if you, well, Caroline Ray has like that realness to her, where she's like, yeah, I get it. I'm hosting the biggest loser, botany house. Yeah. She's like, I'm funny. I'm funny. I'm like, uh, uh, uh, I'm funny. I'm funny. I'm like, uh,

I'm trying to think of the name's Lady, not Ellen, main Ellen, but the other Ellen, he used to be in the 80s. Oh, like booze where? Yeah, she's like a like booze la happy. She's also got the big redener.

Read a redener. Read a redener with a legit funny. Actually, we're just like really making Gina appetizing to me. Yeah, I'm like, we don't see that's the thing. There's like no version of like, I can't think of any version of like a female comic that is the equivalent of like a Dan Cook, you know?

Like who is the Dan Cook of female comics? I'm not gonna say anything, I'm gonna get my, I don't know, because I would just be making up names and not really feeling it. So let's just, I'm just going to move on to Matt being a monster as well. The point is this, Gina winds up with pseudo-erica-jane hair except it's like not, it's not erica-jane hair. It's like, basically like, erica-jane is Beverly Hills and Gina is Orange County and that's the difference between their hair. Well, also many, like so much money is the difference between their hair, you know. Like if you see Erica Jane looking stupid, it's like, well, yeah, but it costs like 90 grand

to look that stupid. And you see, you know, looking that stupid and it's like, oh my God, she looked that stupid and it's like out of a box, she could do it at home, you know, so. Yeah, yeah, it's like don't go to Fantastic Sam's again, you know, but you know, the thing is that she, it's sort of like the attitude also because Erica's look is like out of the fuck and Gina's is like, oh my God, I actually give a lot of fucks right now. I give a lot of Fox.

Yeah, I don't know. Like I'm giving more fucks than a whorehouse of tax season. You know, it's like a lot of Fox given ads. A lot of, a lot of Fox. So I guess I should say tax reimbursement season. Tax refund season. Tax refund season is what I've had people are like, why do hookers work harder at tax time? Because more CpA's are stressed out. I know this because that's what Matt does. I don't know. That does. I don't think he does anything. He got fired for fucking being a wife abuser.

So there's that. Click in. So, anyway, I don't know why I just yelled quick in. Could I just imagine that? He yelled quick in and I depressed the fuck out of myself. So we're in an impasse. Have fun with the rest of this. So now it's OC Fashion Week day. It's gonna be Rowan's big, big runway show at OC Fashion Week,

which is a thing on boats. And so we're at Bronwyn's house and Dr., Mother of the Year, Dr. Deb is there, and like Bronwyn has nine kids, but apparently there's also like an entire other batch of half siblings. So they're all there too. So it's just it's basically like a small Coachella. That's in that kitchen. And they're all cheers and like cheers to row in. I'm so happy for you. Blah blah blah. Like your half brothers here. He's from Yale. I don't even know where he is. Oh, is that where he came in from? I heard her say she came in from somewhere, but I didn't hear yell. Yeah, he came in from yell.

So yell. He came in from yell. Oh, so the most sexual utterance of yell that I'm this podcast, yell. He's a real ill eye. We can do that. The Havons. So Shannon is over talking to her stylist in it. No. He's a real ill eye. We can do that. The Havons. So Shannon is over talking to her stylist in it.

You know, Shannon has a lot of it, but I love Shannon. And it just makes me so sad when people think that their stylist really like them, because you know that her stylist really hates her ass and she's like, let me tell you about my children. You think my face is blotchy? Is it blotchy? Is it blotchy? Yeah, I mean, it's like, yes, we need to cover that up.

And did you notice he's putting like, Tin Man makeup on her? It's like, he's fixing a car. You know, it's like, he's fixing a car that was in a rear-end or at the home goods. It's like a back-end. It's like, yes, like metal, back-end. Just metal, big metal, back-end. I'm sorry, I just interrupted you making your home

good scar. It would have never ended. It wasn't a joke. That was like really thinking of home good scuffles I've seen. Yeah, no, he's definitely like, it's like, you know what, it's like when you make a ginger breadhouse and you're like, you have like, you have like the ginger bread or the graham crackers and then you got to put the, you got to put the snow on it. That's what it was. It's like the snow. It's just going

on. Yes. Frosting a cake. Talking. Talking. Point is there's a lot of stuff on our face. And so she's getting all that done. And then Adeline, her daughter is going to be walking in the show. And so Shannon is starting to give her some notes as she's walking along. I'm like, okay, Adeline, did you brush your teeth? Do you get, you have to brush your teeth? But those heels are on Adeline. Adeline? Okay.

Now let's see, let's see that walk. Now, please remember that my criticism will be impaired on account of the blurry vision of one of my eyes because I do still suffer from that mild concussion from Arizona several weeks later, so please take keep that in mind. Ah, well I'm a hands-on mom, so when they do something, I'm going to do it. Hands-on! You know what's funny? My mom wasn't that hard on me as a kid.

I was hard on me. I was a so starder, so I want that for my children, which is why I'm getting them into things like fashion shows and bands. Yeah. And um, feeling sad about men. So we are doing a lot as a family right now and Anteline. You better want fresh your teeth, Anteline. Fresh your teeth. Fresh your teeth. Fresh your teeth. Like it's a microfoam. So then we see her doing her dream catcher, Mama Ging, which, you know, for me, so many classic.

Dream catcher. Mark ladies who rock. So then we're back with Bronwyn and she's just with every girl dreams of when she's having her big debut somewhere. Their mom just show up just with her kids saying that, you know, it's what I always wanted when I was growing up. I was like, mom, just put just put some pasties on. How about that for my for my middle school graduation or whatever?

It was basically like someone told a community college fashion wannabe to make something for a figure skater that reminds them of Lady Gaga. I thought it was very black swan. It was very Natalie Portman and black swan, which is funny that you would wear that to your daughter's thing, because I automatically puts whoever next to you as the black swan. Like you're the white swan, you know. And Brawman's like, I love fashion. I'm like well, yes, we are but okay that's Rass So then she's she's like well, I look like I sort of look like a fancy big bird. I'm like well, it's not yellow or fancy, but

Ferry okay, it's furry furry so pearls So her husband Sean is like, all to your shoe. Can you even imagine doing this a year ago? She's like, no, our daughter has come so far because her daughter had OC. I didn't realize in the scene last week, Bronwood was telling Shannon, my daughter has OCD. And then she lost 25 pounds and it was funny.

Singered again on the previous leaves, because Shannon has OCD. I mean, that was Shannon's first storyline. Was it? She was so OCD, everything had to be clean. And that's true. And that's kind of an air conditioner that doesn't have real air. It has green air or whatever her thing was. And she just looks at her like, you bet you kidding me?

I've had OCD for years. I have to start myself loose 25 pounds. Do you think that I do my windshield wipers because I want to? No, I have to do eight of them by the end of the sentence. Otherwise, the theater will leave me. Oh God, here he left. Oh God. Oh God.

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That crap is commercial. So brawin' yeah, so basically brawin' and shawnt are talking about how far brawin' has come, which is really truly excellent. And then rolin' comes in, they talk about how proud they are. And basically like every scene with brawin' they are. And basically, like, every scene with Bronwyn and Sean always feels like the last scene in the 86 come. Like they're all sitting on the couch and like learn their lessons and are just like laughing.

And then they're gonna like freeze and creeds are gonna come up. Yeah. Ha ha ha ha ha. Oh, so Boats on the dock. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. The yacht, the family arrives.

The fashion show is on a yacht. By the way, Project Runway, we saw a commercial. At this point, there's a promo that comes up. Project Runway is back on December 5th, which is really soon. I guess how I feel like Top Chef will come back after it because Top Chef just finished up in LA shooting in LA and they're going off to their finale now. So that's sort of like a later schedule than usual. Probably, they're very, they're very intent on just reassuring us because before this, they were showing a commercial for the new blind date, which was horrifying. It was a horrifying experience to sit through even the pre-broad.ber. Yes. Oh man, they really want to point out the corner of the market on the lodge brothers. Well, what the hell? Like you can't you need to make up your mind, brobo. Stay in your lane. Are you about like opulence

and fun, you know, or are we blind dates? Okay, you can put a gay couple in it all you want to. It's still fucking blind date. Stop it. You can't say blind date and then project runway. That's not how the world works. Okay. I know. And then they have cash cab also, which I mean, cash cab is fun to watch. I just don't understand why it's on Bravo. It's like very strange. And I was watching it. Watch some guy lose like the scoop of people lose all this money because they didn't know that a dry ice was carbon dioxide. I was like, oh, God. Well, there you go. just lost $30,000. Thanks, Ben. Yeah, thanks. All right. Yes, they better put Shadow Modor on cash cab, by the way. They better. Okay, well, I don't understand. I don't know what Carman Dioxide is, but I will phone a friend.

And let's see, hi, David. This is your ex-wife. Hello? Oh, well, I guess he doesn't care about me earning $30,000 for our children. Carpenteroxide is made out of dial tones and blonde slut to bed on the beach cackling in the background. Ha, ha, ha, ha. I'm not sure what carb, I'm not sure what dry I says, but I can tell you that there's just a little bit

too much sugar in this sauce. And I'd like to send it back, please, I'll just take some salmon with cream pizina instead. Thank you, did I win? What I win. So let's see here. Shannon is hanging out with Adelines friends and just making fun of teasing her.

Like, you have to do it again, get up there and watch! Yeah, Shannon is becoming a terror because when they walk onto the boat, she's there There's that long sort of like gang plank or pass or yell whatever it's called a long ramp to get onto the boat And she's like all right, I don't like this. This is your runway. This is your runway. Come on. We need to see some attitude Come on go forward do it do a walk do a walk because you never know maybe maybe I'll hand some young man is watching and he'll fall in love with you because you're so happy and

I'm a short So doctor or not doctor Deb a Bronwyn is seeing all these clothes for the first time these bathing suits And it turns out it is black swan. It's hilarious because everything is black That's all of them have like red details. It's kind of Valentine's Eve But it is like black and white salon which is you know not gonna end well for you Bronwyn just a spoiler alert yeah so um then we go over to Dr. Deb arriving um just kook here at the never we're making noise honey let them know your comments by the way do you hear the motorcycle outside my window? Do you hear that? Sorry, about some pain.

Asshole. Some asshole my building has a motorcycle. And what happens is every time you have to go somewhere, you turn on his motorcycle and then he sits there and lets it run for like five minutes. I don't know if that's what you have to do, like to let it warm up. No, you don't. But he sits there and he like checks his text and what happens is you just have this annoying motorcycle noise in the background for a long time and he's the worst and I'm mad.

Yeah, that is the worst. So sorry about your dick, you know, sorry about your tiny penis, okay? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, have a fun drive, Ryan. So, uh, anyway, so everyone's showing up, Kelly, I mean, Emily shows up with that, her Emily face on she's and then Eddie is like Eddie and Tamra are there and they see Bronwyn and they're Eddie's like so did you guys make out and like of course grandma's like

and then like talking about that they like made out a little bit like joking that there was like some tongue involved etc. And. And did we mention that Tamara is kind of hinting that this was the salt on Tamara on her Instagram. We did that last week, right? Oh, I do. I don't know if we did or if I was just telling you in the car, but I think we had a bonus episode. Yeah, someone was like, you're discussing. I would be embarrassed for that to happen in front of my children, then making out.

She goes, actually, that's not true. She I was completely wasted and she jumped on me. Oh, okay So glad they showed that scene of you sitting up completely tunging her down to fucking camera course camera do that I know and also I'm at it Eddie because I'm you know what? I'm really sick of Eddie and his giant collars He has been rocking giant collars for like seven or eight years and like no one has called him on it Like is there there's never been a giant collar that he did not want to put on and it's like always giant and then like out and big and just like so huge.

He needs smaller collars. Smaller collar. You're new. You're new. Ben's new business smaller collar. Smaller collar from pedigo. So yeah, he's like, do you make out? And they start laughing about it. And I don't know.

Like the first time I learned about Swingers was from the back of the Hussar magazine in the 7-Eleven when I was like 12 with my friends. Like we were, we'd always sneak back and like look at all the Hussar magazines and stuff. And I just thought that was the grossest thing because it was always like someone's, someone's parents, you know, because they would put pictures of there It's like He's in the world disgusting and then you grew up and think that's really fun like that does not sound fun, okay?

I know I really am envious of people who found out about sewing in by watching the ice storm like what a way to learn about it, you know Through like Allison's way about it, you know? Yeah. Through like Allison's head. The classiest way. Yeah. So Eddie, of course, is like, can I watch next time? So, Cameron's like, God, that's my husband.

I was like, oh, okay. So now your storyline is that you're kind of swingers when last year you were freaking out that anyone even suggested that he might not be completely straight. Yeah. So of the, anyway, the friends, I don't know, now we're just going all over the Real House West Orange County fashion show and it's just, everyone's showing up and like everyone's there and Gina shows up and this is the first time everyone's seen her new bleach blonde hair and so everyone's like, oh, and Kelly's like, yo, look, yo, it's nice.

It's nice. And then she tells us she's like, when you're going through a divorce, especially from a dork, you don't want to change your hair because of low self-esteem after a divorce. And then you try to make yourself look better, but you want to make yourself look really ugly. Case in point, Gina, exhibit A, exhibit twerp exhibit okay and she's so rude and the camera is just staring at Gina going let me take a bit let me take it in let me take it in so everyone hates it pretty much and promise like wow the kachu making changes and so Gina's yeah, making thoughts to changes and Dr. Debkus, maybe you need some Adderall to deal with all those changes.

Yeah, it's been an actual medical professional telling you that. So now it's time for the malt to take seats for the first runaway show. This is so we should really talk about the fact that this OC Fashion Week is taking place basically on a circle liner. It's like one of those tourist yachts. And so as three stories, and they've pulled out their fanciest bridge chairs. And on top of that, not only has they're like all these folding chairs, which obviously folding chairs, I don't have a problem with that. But they are, I don't know if you noticed noticed this Ronnie, but every folding chair had a magazine on it. And the cover of the magazine was basic. I was like, this is at least they know, at least they know. Up and up magazine.

I know. Gather magazine. So anyway, so they're all they're all they all wind up taking seats for this because the the first fashion show It takes place on the first floor and then on the second floor is where the models change and the third floor is where the next fashion show happens Which to me sounds like a logistical nightmare, but so be it. Yeah I'm also didn't they did they say Jesse J's fashion show They announced somebody else's name and I thought they said Jesse J's fashion show? And now somebody else's name, and I thought they said Jesse J, and I was like, really, already? Yeah.

That's it. I wouldn't be surprised, but I don't think it was Jesse J. I think they said there's something about a rabbit. I think that I think her line is like, it's called like slow rabbit or something like that. And then it was something by like Jessica J, or I don't know.

Jessica J. I mean, I don't think Jesse J is at OC Fashion Week just yet. Maybe she's like, I don't know, I mean, I don't think Jesse J is at OC Fashion Week just yet. Maybe she's like, I don't know, I mean, the fall, the rise happens fast and the fall happens fast. That's true. I think that like maybe at this point, she's maybe she's at like,

I don't know, a Humberg Fashion Week, but like maybe not OC just yet. Humberg Fashion Week, the next line in the real house so that's a word to candy fashion shop. Hamburg guys. We're showing at Hamburg. That actually sounds fancy. So maybe you guys Rowan is walking hamburgers in the shop. We've come so far. So they all take seats and then Emily sits down next to Gina and

Emily goes, I'm going to sit here. I love you. This is like Emily's new thing is that she has a constantly, like, reminds Gina that she loves her, like, every single thing. Oh, do you want a cocktail? I love you. Yeah, so don't forget we're friends. Okay, remember me, we're supposed to be friends on this, so please don't yell at me again.

I love you, I love you. So Gina, of course, is tell me just, Oh my god, I talk to her, I talk to her, I you. So, Gina, of course, is tell me just- Oh my god, I talked to Heidi, Dr. Heidi. Oh, guess what? Matt's trying to get back with me. He's not even just trying to bone anymore. It's like, can't live without me. Then last night, he tries to kiss me.

I mean, that's like selfish. Yeah. I mean, while there's a girl sitting right next to Emily who's just like Cranny hurt literally cranny her head and it's like Just like just listening and shamelessly Well, it sucks. It's like you're finally at an event where all the real housewives are there and they're filming and you're sitting right behind Gina and Emily. Oh for Luck, you know, you just get to hear Gina yawning on and on. Yeah, exactly.

So yeah, everybody is talking about Matt and Emily is concerned that Matt is fucking Gina because, you know, now that Gina is starting to move on, now Matt wants to reel her back in and it's going to do emotional damage to which I say, yes, yes, and you are right. That is exactly what's going to happen. Yeah, and I'll say, you know, to most of my friends who come to me every day telling me about how, you know, their relationship problem, how fucked it up again. This is my general advice. Be quiet. Okay, I don't want to hear about it. Let's go to a movie. How about that? It's good to move you. It's every day. It's every day with you.

Yeah, every day you write the book. So, um, every day, every day you write the book. So, every day, every day. So now it's time for the fashion show to be. Well, first, the first floor fashion show happens. And then that ends. Now everyone has to go up the tiny staircase to the third floor. I mean, I don't know why they do this. Like, why not just have it all in one place is driving me absolutely nuts, but fine, whatever.

Yeah, like, do you need a big set change to walk some city clothes down on, you know, like a tiny yacht, I, I, dinner crews, I, come on. Give me a bite. I know. I know. Like we're going to clear the salads now. Sam is going to be on floor two. Oh, they probably had to clear floor one because there's going to be like a bar mitzvah coming through. So, uh, so now they're going to like go upstairs. And so this lady, uh, basically finds the orange county women and is like, okay, I'm gonna score you guys. She's gonna take them because obviously they're like the celebrities there, right? So, um, Deb, Dr. Deb is with them and she's like, I just have to go to the bathroom.

And as she's trying to go to the bathroom, there's like a security dude who clearly doesn't know who she is or whatever. And she walks by and he goes, we hear him, go, excuse me and she's, do not touch me. I'm going to the bathroom. And he goes very politely. I thought he goes, oh thank you. May I respond to that? She's like, I don't respond to people who grab me on the arm. I was like, oh no. I think he said, she said, don't touch me. And he said, well, you didn't respond. Meaning he was saying, excuse me. And she kept walking. So he touched her and she's like, how dare you? And he's like, but you didn't respond. And she goes, I don't respond to people who grab me.

So she goes, this guy grabbed me on the arm. And I was like, don't touch me. Yes, the woman who was wearing a jacket that says nothing but like love love love like you go everyone's the best you go Don't touch me and so he was like he's like I didn't grab you. I touched you was like no you grab me I then Kelly says we're in gentlemen, dude. He's a gentleman She's yeah, respect your elders because you did disrespect. Okay, listen, you weren't supposed to be up on that floor. Okay, period. Yeah, I don't know why I don't know since when does the Orange County fashion show think it's so fucking fancy? No one goes up. This is the real housewives of Orange County fashion show, man. We cannot have any guests up here unless they see the coconut shrimp before it's ready.

So this guy, by the way, this guy is smiling. He is very friendly and he even says, and you have to listen hard because they didn't really raise the mic, but he actually says, I do apologize. He actually apologized and she is now furious. She was grabbed and like God forbid, you stopped this crazy lady from going to the bathroom and he's like, I'm not, I'm doing a pile, he's like little smiley, it's like not even,

he's not even being an asshole or tense, he looks adorable, right? And she is furious. Dr. Debra's just auditioning for her, you know, her role on the show. What you've already got, you know, you're the wacko mom, okay, you can stop auditioning now. No one needs to see you fight a door man.

Okay, pick on somebody your own size. Well, she's not the only one auditioning because Kelly Dodd apparently has a gay and he springs into action. And he's like, this is Couture. It's very expensive. You can't just touch it. I was like, you go, you get that role,

you get that screen time. The gay is in Orange County were hilarious, like all the shots of the little gays, because then after this, they showed gays like on the on the his on the security guard side, and the lady runs a fashion show who we're getting to. And then they were just all surrounding her. And one was like in a bright like pink jacket with his little Lisa Vanderpump dog. And he like a big poof of hair like what happened and hoodline needs a scratch batch. No one messes with cafe from dealers.

So now Dr. Deb is furious so she goes to report the security guard for grabbing her arm. So she goes this like back room area to speak to the officials of OC Fashion Week. And she's like, this man grabbed my arm and I'm, well, she goes, hello, I'm Braun Win's mother. Is it if anyone knows who Braun Win is, right? I'm Braun Win's mother. Slash a crazy person wearing a necklace that says ego and love. Anyway, I demand demand full service my arm was touch and no one touches my arm I Know that my hair looks like an unrivaled poof from world market, but listen here I deserve respect and ladies like listen listen sweetheart. We don't know you are

And she's like oh don't don't you call me sweetheart? Oh Don't you call me sweetheart? I was like, oh, good. Dr. Dennis is going to yell at everybody today. That man tried to steal my car. It's the ballet ma'am. Yeah. So now Dr. Deb finds Bronwyn, who has not seen any of this, so she tells Bronwyn.

And now this is what the story is. Well, I was just trying to go to the bathroom and there's big, security guy grabbed me by the arm and said, where are you going? And I said, I'm going to the bathroom and this big security guy grabbed me by the arm and said, where are you going? And I said, I'm going to the bathroom. He said, you could have said that. I'm like, that's not how it happened. He said, excuse me.

He said, excuse me. He's not some big old security guard. He was just like a guy in a blazer. Okay. And he'd like either touched you or like, grabbed you by the arm, which is what security guards do. And by the way, they're allowed the arm, which is what security guards do. And by the way, they're allowed to do that, because they're security, okay?

And you are acting as if he held a knife to your throat and threatened to throw you overboard, Dr. Deb. You need to chillax, saw. Oh, and Bronwyn is like, what? He touched you? What did he say? What did he do? And Dr. Deb's making it so big.

So she's like, I'm gonna, did she apologize apologize? I'm going to take care of this mother. Yeah. I'm going to do the top one. I'm going to do it for you. Mother, what you never did for me. Yes. I'm going to be the mother to you that you never were for me. So yeah, Daz is like, oh, and people think, I'm crazy. Just because I wear this hair, like, no, also because you're like randomly starting fights with security guards, you know, to get attention. That's also why.

Yeah, exactly. So Bronwyn goes stomping up to this lady. I didn't catch her name, but she's like one of the administrators. Kathy, her name is Kathy. Kathy, just like our friend from below deck Mediterranean, remember Kathy. You're not always a Kathy. So this Kathy is there. So Bronwyn stomps up in her feathery dress

with like, you know, the hobby lobby pearls on it. And so she comes stomping up and she's like, I think you need to apologize to my mom right now or else it's going to be a bad thing. And the lady, Kathy's like, okay, well, why don't you have a talk with me first and then I'll apologize. She's like, I'm not going to fuck up my daughter's night.

If you've attacked my mother, I'm like, this has gotten so blown out of proportion. It's ridiculous. But then God wraps up a little spiritual gift that he's been working on for 40-something years. It's in a weird, tightly-drapped sequined dress, stings its face with a bunch of bees, and shoves it down the assembly line. And our gift is named Kathy. So Kathy just starts slowly losing it. She's like, um, actually, I think you are making a false, um, accusation right there.

So are you going to make a mistake right there? Cause you don't have a clear communication or understanding of what happens, what actually happened. Which, oh, oh, Kathy came by the way. I know Kathy did not flinch. I was like, you know what, I was like team Kathy. I was like, she's right. She's basically like, I'm trying to run a fashion week. That's not a real fashion week on a boat. Okay, I'm trying to do this right now.

And you're gonna come up to me because your mom had to go to the bathroom and got mad. Like, that's what's going through Kathy's mind right now. She's like, I cater. She's like, I cater. She's like, I cater from six to eight PM. And then I go like, do the stock at justice to save up, to buy this dress on mail order from Delards, to run three floors of little bitches

who've mothers have paid for them to own fashion shows. Okay. And you're gonna yell at me. You're gonna yell at me. I spend five days a week working at the John Wayne Airport overseeing the Alamo rental desk. Okay, it is hell. The one thing I get to look forward to once a year is this fake fashion show.

So let me have this. Okay, let me have it. So Kelly sees Kathy start getting like bitchy and she goes oh She's got attitude She's got attitude At which point Kathy starts going sweetheart to brawling sweetheart. I'm like sweet Be careful with that sweetheart. It's not gonna. It's not gonna do you any favors Because Bronwyn is coming for her. She got Bronwyn's like um you don't want to do this right now She's oh sweet heart. I't, I don't need this.

And she goes, a couple of guys, girl, be cool, be professional girl. Girl. And brawman's doing this whole thing like we have kids in the same school. And this is our night. I'm like, oh my God, this is really happening. It doesn't just happen a big little lives. It happens in Orange County too. This is amazing.

A mom fight. You put your hands on my mother. I did not touch your mother. I don't have the psychic skills to know in advance who the guests are going to be. And he's trying to break into a third, four god damn bathroom. But there's one on the first back in mind. You know, this is not just a bathroom on the second floor. That's crazy. Come on. Yeah. Kathy is losing it at this point. Before then, Kathy was being like a really good bureaucrat. Being like, well, if we can have a conversation, we can discuss this.

But now she's like, all right, all right, I've been dealing with customers all week and I'm not going to deal with this shit on fashion night. Okay, she's like, I see what you're trying to do. I see what you're trying to, I don't have to psychic skills, okay, to know in advance who all the guests are. And that includes your crazy mother

who was dressed like Burning Man out of dealers, right? So then she's just like losing her mind. Now she's like really screaming. And Kelly goes, where are you going? Where are you going? As if like she and Bronwyn have not totally assaulted this woman when she's trying to do her job. It's like stop yelling at me.

Come out. Actually, I can be as loud as I want to be and she's just me, can't. You're a work Give her Mike she's holding the mic and puts it up to her face and she's like I'm working and I can be as loud as I want to be Because I'm working Such a baller move it was so crazy, but it was so baller that she's like, oh you want to see me get loud I will get loud over a loud speaker,

and then I'm putting you on next. And then she goes to town. So Kelly just goes, oh, you're a psycho. But she backed off, you know? It's like people like that who are the second, they get bullied back. They're like, oh, what? They have to go back to their quiet corner.

And then meanwhile, the entire time all this fight is happening There's this like one lady who's like sitting off to the side. I named her Diane Spighanati because she has this like puff of blonde hair And she's got she has like her fanciest black sequins dress on and she's just like watching and trying not trying to act Like she's not invested in this drama, but is totally invested totally invested. Yeah She was my favorite side character. Every time the camera didn't even cut to her, you had to like seek her out when you found her. Yeah, but when you showed her,

I was like, that is every woman my mother used to play tennis with. Yeah, this is growing up. Diane's speaking about it. Diane's big of the hottie. There she is. There she is. Looking great. Oh, those legs.

Diane's speaking about it. Great legs, girl. Great games. Yeah. So yeah, so she's putting Kelly's like, your psycho and she puts a mic up to her face. And so Kelly says some of the mic, your psycho. And she's that, that is defamation. And Kelly's like, that's

not defamation because it's true. How could it be a definition? You're proving it right now, Spicle. You're not gonna fight those I Spic-O! You're a confin-O Spic-O! At which point, Bronwyn just starts saying, Adeline and Rowan, Adeline and Rowan, Adeline and Rowan. Which is a really dead line and row. That's a shelter, Anne.

I've ever saw a woman at a formal event going, Adeline and Rowan, Adeline and Rowan, I would probably do like a 51-40 on her. And Kathy, that's the mic up to Kelly's face again. And Kelly's like, get down on my face, you psycho. Remember the children and Kathy's like, Oh, and now Kathy is walking the runway with the microphone, giving monolots. She goes, oh, they really get sick and tired of things that aren't true.

Okay, okay. Well, we've got witnesses here. Lots and lots of fans here, lots and lots of fans. Witnessing. Kathy's not even making any sense either. Like she's completely off her rocker. By the way, this is a distinct message to Kim D. You better like, you better like, bring your A game to the next posh fashion show because OC Fashion Week is kind of killing it right now. I don't know. I think they've officially stopped the Kim D fashion shows. The posh fashion show. So sad. So, uh, Gorgah for that. So, Bronwyn is just like, she can't believe how Kathy has gone so off the rails. So she goes and finds Sean and she's like, this woman is crazy

and she was fighting and then they put my put an arm on my mother and this and that. And now she was fighting and then they put my, put an arm on my mother and this and that. And now she was like, I shot a microphone. She is totally derailed and Sean's like, okay. Yeah, he has like, uh, hi, we're at our daughter's fashion show right now. And she's like, what do you need to fix it? Cause if I fix it, my way, I'm going to jail. Yeah. So he's like, Oh, God, thank God I have this huge medallion on my, on my dress. To keep me calm.

To keep me calm. Yeah. this huge medallion on my on my top. Keep me calm. Then so then Kelly of all people is like, well, that might be jamming on a chin. It let them work. Oh, look at the more. Can you believe it? Let them work.

Well, I would I would inspect it, but unfortunately my I my on my vision is still a little bit blurry from the mild concussion that that you gave me. So I'm afraid I can't see your mark, which is where they go right because Kelly said, yeah, I was left to mark you at me in the face. She said, that's the information.

They went on my face and Tamer goes, oh wait, so she hit you like, you had shaman, that kind of hard, it's like really a different kind of hard, because oh, I'm not shinin as a joke. Yeah. And I liked also when Kelly was like, Well, you know, my knee-jerk reaction was to slap the shit out of her, but I didn't because they're children around! They're children!

I believe the children are a future and you shouldn't slap stupid bitches around them! So meanwhile, Kathy is just walking the runway with the mic, and she's like, You remember that 13-year-old girl? Well, she came up with a fashionably responsible program and it is for anti-bullies. Wow. Wow. And that means every one of you, every one of you here have seen if any of you have been verbally abused tonight. You and then she starts walking to like stomping towards you. You can hashtag anti-boy, anti-boy, anti-boy.

Anti-boy. That's my boss. Hashtag assault! Hashtag assault! Oh my god, this woman like her little anti-bullying Ted talk down the runway was so amazing. Some people will laugh. Some people will laugh and make a mockery. I'm not saying who, but it's probably these bitches in the front row with camera crew in front of their face.

Some people will laugh, but do you really laugh at bullying? Anti-bullying? Hashtag anti-bullying? Hashtag anti-bullying? This is a wacko jacko! We just keep saying wacko jacko over and over again. So then the girl with buns from Sweeney Todd comes up. Like, you know, the girl who actually did all the work.

Yeah, like the assistant who did all the work comes up and she is, um, should we get on with the show now? Should we, should we like maybe you want to step off the catwalk? Maybe before you totally ruin this? Thanks And now here we are with dark Dark wrap that's what it was dark rabbit so Rowan's collection comes out and you know It's you know, it's I'm not a fashion case so I say Black bathing suits with some red shit on it more than I can do

To be good to me who does be. So that's all happening. And Deb is just smiling. She's just so happy to see that like someone that she's spawned has like done something productive. She's like, oh my God. There is a future for this family. Yeah, but at the same time, Dr. Deb goes to her granddaughter's thing and then does everything she can to get more daughter than her more camera times than her granddaughter.

It's like Jesus Christ. So then everyone's like a rush to see who's crying first over this. You know, it's like, you're so pleased getting involved. Yeah, Sophie. So then after everyone says, I'm a rat a lot, I don't know.

So then I say, happy, I can rat, Emily goes, you gotta give credit to a 16 year old who not only has vision, but also the bill, also was able to execute it. I was like, yeah happy, congrats. Emily goes, you got to give credit to a 16 year old, who not only has vision, but also the bill, also was able to execute it. I was like, yeah, and rich parents. Yeah. Yeah.

And the building blocks for life, huh, Ryan? Yeah, I'm going to pull a building. So you made all these bathing suits at a rappers for sandwiches that were discarded at the front of the football fields. It is kind of funny. If you really think about this episode, it was one giant episode to shame Tamra, right?

Because if the whole thing is, if it opens and closes with Ryan complaining that he doesn't have the building blocks for life, and then we see an entire episode of like parents encouraging their children and being so supportive and being happy, you're like, no, he does have a point. We really shouldn't, we really, we really shouldn't underestimate how damaging it is to have Tamra as your mom. No, Ryan could be still loaded and still wouldn't, still wouldn't be anything because he makes no effort. You know, you don't have to be like a spoiled little rich kid to work your ass off, you know? It's like, be a good, be a good marijuana dealer in your neighborhood.

You know what I mean? Like, I don mean? I'm not falling for it Ryan. I'm not falling for it. You couldn't even commit to a steroid use. Exactly. Exactly. You can't even commit to drugs. Sir. So the family van, here we go.

And you just know that this is a kick and Vicki's nuts, this whole scene of the family van. So Bruno was like, she starts going off in the car. She's like, that. So Rowan, you know that crazy bitch, Kathy, she tried to fight with me. The security guard actually tried to get me kicked out of the show. And don't mess with my kids. Don't fuck with me. Do not fuck with my kids. Do not fuck with my family. Too late. Too late. Yeah, they're all like, you're in the car all the way home. Yeah. Too late. So then Brahman tells us the ultimate her ultimate revenge is turning

this all into a dig against her mother. She goes, well, I didn't have that person protecting me growing up. So I remember what it was like to not have someone coming to my rescue mother. Oh, yeah. well, you know what, your mother also left you piles and piles of cocaine in bars. So I would say, you know, sometimes you just got to say thank you and thank you as appropriate. Yeah, it's called you have front row seats to like, punctures. So there, that makes up for it, obviously.

I'm sorry that your mother was working. I'm sorry that you didn't appreciate crowdsurfing at age five. So then I don't know why we followed that amazing seed with Cathy up with Bronwyn and Emily going to talk about who had the worst childhood, but that's what we get next. They're writing horses and talking about how their family sucks. Yeah, they, uh, they, yeah, they go to some horses, a horse called Pepsi, a horse called Kena, and they start writing the horses and talking about childhood and under life,

such as dreams and life sucks and Emily thinks that chain is like a really great dad because look at her kids. So which is sort of like more about the kids than the dad, but who knows. And, uh, he is like, if you're a good husband, sometimes, but he exists. He exists and he pays none of the bills, but I don't know. One of my kids had a spaghetti on his shirt the other day, which means he was fed. So I'm doing everything for my children. You know, and now she's starting this marriage. I go, okay, it's a loveless marriage, but I'm doing it because I want my children to

be happy, but you had children with a loveless, horrible human being. So it's like, I don't know what game you're trying to win here, lady, but you're basically littering the earth with shame. So yeah, exactly. And then Bronwyn tells us more about her childhood, which is that her dad was an alcoholic. And so that caused the destruction of his relationship with her mom. And then the mom had a lot of resentment about it. So she kept the dad from being part of Bronwyn's life, which Bronwyn now resents. So again, fuck you mother. Yeah.

Ever seen. Yeah. So then Gina is curling her hair. She's got these huge lashes on. She's getting gussied up, you know. And she, and it turns out she's getting so dressed up because she's going to therapy with Matt. Oh my god.

That's some like therapy. Oh, the second half of the show is with Matt. Oh my god. That's some therapy. Oh, the second half of the show is so depressing. There really is. Yeah, she's basically, Gina tells a crazy story. So she's like, so you know, last night, it was really funny. So Matt was in co-host last night and was like, oh my god, I want to come over.

So like, of course, I was being sort of snockey. So I blocked him. And he kept on calling me from like another number that I don't know. So it was like, I was ignoring it and ignoring it. And then he like showed up at 1 a.m. And then like, oops, I forgot to lock the door, even though my children are in the house. Anyway, hashtag, good parent.

So he like came in. I guess I didn't see him because I was distracted talking to Dr. Hardy, who's in Nigeria right now. He looks exactly like Brad Pitt, like almost identical. It's kind of crazy. So all of a sudden, just like Matt came into the house. And anyway, he's looking for a job in Orange County. I'm like, I didn't even know he was there until the morning.

Wait, what? Also, none of this story sounds very believable. It's weird. Like Matt was just happened to be in Cotto. And then I don't know if, I don't know if she's trying to make it sound terrifying or what, but she's like, you know, like that's crazy that Matt walked in at 1 a.m.

But also it feels good, because your heart's like, I want this for a son or child, but then your head's like, talk to Harry, you know? And like I'm gonna regret following my heart, you know? Even if it's not the smartest decision. The fact, the fact that her literal quote was, it's alarming that Matt walked into my

house at one o'clock in the morning, but it feels good that Matt cares about me. I was like, mm, and least now all my tuna cans are facing the same direction. I never knew that towels could be that evenly spaced out. It'd be after. You know what's great when you've got a psycho ex, it's like basically having a cleaning lady for free. So now we're at our final scene over at Patch Coffee with Ryan and Tamer. Patch, coffee, patches, patch.

I think that's why I think that's why Tamer shows I'm assuming Tamer shows it because there's no way that Ryan would ever go to any coffee shop It's probably like a bunch of lefty queers run that place, but just made him homophobic more homophobic. So then No, so but I imagine time was like patch there's's a new place called patch that I got a patch coffee. Really baseless. Base really purely on the bilabial fricative that it creates. I don't know what that means. bilabial fricatives.

I think it's the sound. I think it's sound. I could be wrong. Maybe a bilabial fricative is a sound. You're a bylay be a fricative. See, this is what happens. This is what happens when the recording messes up. We, I don't know, we have to address it. There are Ronnie's computer seized up, like chocolate that was trying to melt with too much water in it. Okay. And while it was fixed, you're so fancy over there with your bilateral fricatives. I don't know what happened.

We came back on and like Ronnie's like, well, now I've lost all my energy. I was like, yeah, me too. I probably am using it all incorrectly. Now I've got to look it up. Maybe it's bilingual consonant. This has been a nine hour recap. Okay. We're getting to buy a BL consonant. It's a voicelessiceless bilabial stop. That's what up is. And that's exactly what Tamra is a voiceless bilabial stop. Yes, Tamra is definitely a bilabial stop. So, sorry, everyone. Multiple labias just stopping a tamra screaming.

I'm back next one. That bad. Labias just freezing up all over the days. On the news tonight, labias have That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it.

That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it.

That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's you're a pentan, he's like, oh, a whole lot of nothing. Really, why is that? Do you have a job? Do you have to support yourself in any

way? Are you living off the 10 grand or whatever the hell you're getting a month for a year for this job that you're on because you have a famous mother? Yeah, exactly. So he has been dating anyone because, you know, people have eyes. And then also he's been secluded. And one thing has nothing to do. I'm just saying people have eyes to different, two different statements. And you can infer what you want on both of them. There's a week called them by Orbeal. So that, yeah, he's been, Ryan's been secluding himself and not has no interest in anything, probably

hanging out on 4chan, who knows, he's had zero feelings these days. And what will make Ryan happy? The question that no one has ever asked, and he goes, I don't play the victim role, but some people have better opportunities to springboard off of. That's literally the victim role. You have a national television show. So, she's like, yeah, and you didn't have opportunities. I'm just spreading feet of say the key, where it's not.

I'm just going to have to get to when you want to. He's like, yeah, you know, it's like, I mean, I guess I did have some opportunities off. The problem is, my priorities were different because of the situation I was in. You know, it wasn't like with college, you know, it's like, are you going to college Ryan? It's like, no, it's like, I just want to get the fuck out of here. That's it, man.

And it's just, okay, you're not going to say the key word. So I'm going to say, I left your problems to be considered. So yeah. Any basis is like, yeah. And then we see a flashback of Simon telling him okay So this is a turning point in your maturity and understanding you have to understand that there's gonna be rules Which last my check that sounds like a building block to adult like literally everybody's dad built those blocks You know or I guess I shouldn't say because this whole episode is about terrible parents

But then, seriously, but he's acting as if like, he was just like let loose in a barn, which he probably was as a child. But like, I'm sorry you are like, you're in your thirties now, you can't keep complaining about it. Like, people can get their should drive Uber, drive Uber. So the thing is this, he's like,

he's like, I was a trial run, okay? And like, he basis like everyone else, like, all this shit stuff happened to him and then everyone else got a good. So he's like, no one prepped me for life. I got to adult age and that was it. And you know, the thing is this, he probably goes online.

I guarantee he complains about people wanting handouts and welfare and all this and that. And then he comes onto TV and says, all this shit. I guarantee that, I guarantee it. Yes. And the way he phrases that, just like, oh, my parents made all the mistakes with me and then they were onto the other ones.

And they did a good job for them. No, I don't think you're, I don't think you get to suggest that your brother is just that way because he had more opportunities than you. His brother works his ass off. Yeah, Timmer's daughter has literally caught her out of every family photo.

I don't think that that's like an example of like great parent, like not great parenting, but like no mistakes. Yeah. Like I'm like, I think there's like this fun, plenty of dysfunction to go around. So like please stop, you know, victimizing yourself that, oh, you had all the mistakes. I did it. You know, like, you all have the same start. All of did it. You know what? You all have the same start. All of these vines grew out of the same vagina.

And that was tamarinds or womb, I should say. Vines don't grow out of vagina or womb, actually. But you get my point. It all started with a tamarind, okay? Everyone can have a sad victim story. Hell, I'm not even tamarinds son, and I have a victim story from tamarinds. It makes me hurt on my insides.

Yeah, I mean, we, I mean, listen, we can all like talk about our problems or whatever, and it's fun. Like I can talk about how I always sucked in gym class, you know, and that like, you know, traumatized me for physical well-being for years, but I won't. And then the other thing, I guess I just did. But then the other thing is that like he like yes, okay, so No, Tamra maybe not the world's best parent by any stretch of the imagination So yeah, there he is gonna start off life like with an uphill battle But you know what though rise the challenge motherfucker. Yeah, make an effort

So she's like well, Ryan happy to check your email. He, oh, yeah, that went about AOC trying to answer an iron. I mean, I was like, no, that's not going to be a pro. And also, no, the one from the Kayla, the doctor, oh, you can call her Lafka, she doesn't make you feel bad. Yeah, he's like, I'm not unhappy. I'm just in a funk. I think that's literally unhappiness.

Well, your mother is making an effort to get you a therapy scene now. So don't tell me you never got anything from Tamra. Okay. Yeah, exactly. You're famous enough to get someone else to take you off her hands off the Instagram BS. Yeah, enjoy that therapist bill of zero dollars, because your mom probably is gonna pay for it.

So enjoy that, but you didn't get any, you never got a leg up in life, huh? Yeah. Yeah. Okay, so that's how this episode ended. Where everybody's feeling for Ryan so he doesn't have to suffer backlash from file-disgusting shit he said to other people and about other people online. Wonderful. Thanks. Well, actually it was a really wonderful episode. It was great. It was. I mean, the

story of Kathy for Kathy. I mean Kathy, you know, thank you for coming into our lives, Kathy. Next season, new cast member is Kathy because she showed she was not afraid to stand up to these women, even though these women were more famous than her. And she wasn't afraid to be like, oh, you're going to be crazy to me. I'm going to double down the crazy on a microphone. Like that is what we look for in a Bravo star. And I think that Kathy just kind of nailed her audition. See you, if you've read Kathy, well done.

We will talk to you tomorrow, everyone else. Thank you for joining us on video on crap and on demand. If you guys want that go over to Patreon and sign up for the video crap and on demand level. Everybody else, thank you for being here. We love you. Go get tickets, go get shirts, all that good stuff. We will talk to you tomorrow. Boom! Hi everyone!

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