Watch What Crappens - RHOC Live From Dallas: No No, Noella

Episode Date: April 22, 2022

It's the first Noella reunion on Real Housewives of Orange County, and the cast isn't having it. Don't worry, there's also some Shannon pile-ons we can yell about! This week's bonus is a two part road trip for the final leg of our Hunky Dory Tour. Find all of our premium bonuses and video recaps at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cupi from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. We started in New York City and we're ending in my home state Texas. Yep.

And what an amazing way to end it. So thank you guys so much for being here and all the support you've given us. Yeah, it's great. We have some of Ronnie's family here. Here are my chosen families here. We have some people who are at one of our very earliest shows. I mean, it's just great to see all the support through the years, the 10 years. It's been really amazing. We have some people who are at one of our very earliest shows. I mean, it's just great to see all the support through the years, the 10 years.

It's been really amazing. Family family, chosen family, cave family, crappin' family, family family, family family! This has been, this has already been a crazy Texas trip. I'll tell you, this is a third stop on this tour through Texas We started in Austin, which of course great. You know you used to Austin, Houston, then we come here Dallas has its own Shit here. Yes. You don't give a shit about the rest of what Texas is doing I Said I forgot what it's like being in Dallas. We're such slubs. I mean look at us like I know I'm in my old Navy pants from yesterday and like some t-shirt from online that my cousin made me

I'm wearing my t-shirt from the round up Thank you very much. He's wearing a t-shirt from a place where husbands get their dick sucked Yep, and I know the boys they done it Yup, and I know the boys had done it. And you guys are so fancy here. We were in our hotel and we came down the elevator and there is this guy standing in like skin tight. What do you call that material? He was like skin tight like, like, Rayon.

Not play-as-lead, paisley, but what's the word? It was like, it was a tartan pattern. Tartan, yes. Like up to his belly button, you know, with short, like his ankles are showing and I was like, queen, and this is a straight guy, you know? Yeah. I was like, I forgot what this place was like.

I mean, we need to make an effort. I didn't even wear a bra day. Meanwhile, my ego is like out of control now. Like we walked up to the theater and there was this big line. It was like 530. And I was like, oh my god, they're like all ready lining up. For us, there is someone next door who has four million followers on Instagram. I'm like, oh my god.

Thank you. Thank you. Hi. Thanks for having me. Hi. Thank you. I feel thanks for having me. Hi. Thank you. Feel like you're not jaded in. But his name has spelled like Jackson. And I was like, it's a sign.

Jackson's going to come again. No, thank God. We're the number one guy at this. Jackson's done so much co-kill. Probably never come again. Let's be honest. That is true. So it is throw stones when you live in a darn bag.

You go, man. So you guys, this has been, so this is the end of our hunky, dory 10-year anniversary tour. This is our final night. So it's been like a crazy ride. Like, this is the hardest we've ever worked on our lives. It's been so, so fun. Like Ron is already, it's been like a crazy ride like this is the hardest we've ever worked in our lives. It's been so So fun like Ron is already is I mean done watching housewives every day

Don't even know I mean almost like adding numbers, you know It's so much work for a poor little toddler to do And you know how we started this we started this on fucking Broadway, which is crazy. Yes, we did it literally a show on Broadway. When we came out, we were lucky enough to get a toast by Durinda Medley. Durinda Medley. She kicked off the tour with a toast to our Broadway audience. And so we were talking about earlier, like how do we, like, come out here and apologize,

that we don't have a toast from To randomly for the fun like we have to finish it off with the to well, we're gonna finish it off at the tests Is there a doctor in the house? Please welcome Here you go. Rides in the middle. Little moon sandwich. I just realized I think I was speaking out the wrong mic. Here's your mic.

Here's your mic. I brought some refreshments. Hello. Tell us what these wonderful, what this wonderful, wonderful refreshment is. This happens to be a 2020 Sauvignon Blanc. Oh, can I get this in real life? This is a 2020 Sauvignon Blanc made by Yours Truly from Three Moons Wine. It's sold out, but I happen to know somebody who knows somebody.

Yeah. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers, everyone. Cheers. Cheers. Thank you all for coming here tonight. Yes, Ray Zos Glasses in the air.

Cheers. What do you think? Thank you all for coming here tonight. Yes, Rayzo's glasses in the air cheers What do you think it's I like better than church Better than I'm not saying that's because you're here. It's really delicious. I really is. Oh, it really is a little effervescence Yeah, sweet to my palate Reminds me my favorite Pinocchio guy Ramona Pinocchio, okay? Ramona Pinocchio. So Tiffany, what's been up? What have you been up to the past years? Oh, just enjoying my time off screen. Yeah.

A couple of tiktoks. Yeah. Even lives at the hospital occasionally. Yeah, it's like crazy. Like you're like a real doctor. A real doctor. I don't just play one on TV. Yeah, you're like a legit, you're like a legit Clooney dog. Uh-huh. If any of y'all go down tonight, I got you. It's like my dream. It's like my dream.

Careful what you say. This is a finale night. These fuckers. Yeah, we came into this. It's like a punk club, you know? And they're parting really hard here. And they're like, whatever podcast. I was like, watch out. You're going to have to drag some barfin bitches out of here and about. You will. You will. We expect it. So, um, so I have lots of questions about Alice. So first and foremost, are you still in contact with anyone from the cast? Just Deandra. Okay. Oh, I like that. You're in touch with Deandra. I like that. It's your name is before I joined the show. That. Oh, I like that. You're in touch with Deandra.

I like that. It's her son. Before I joined the show. That's right, because you knew Deandra first. And Mama D. And Mama D. The seventh housewife. That's right.

We had Mama D. Our last out of the show, if people remember. By the way, I like saying just Deandra, because it sort of sounds like it's a hair product. I use just Deandra. Deandra. How am I good morning? You can buy it on the 700 Club.

For Mama D. This is Ham Jesus Moshra. Did you enjoy your time on the show? You were on first season. Everyone loved you. I was very sad. I've always actually really loved the Real House Los Adales. I felt like you came on and you were so good.

And then the show's done. Made me very sad. Did you enjoy your time on it? Um. Uh. I mean, just seemed like a full party the whole time. Can we do that? That's when why not?

Can you do that thing where you just drink instead of answering the question? No, this is not a Lisa Rinne game. This is an actual... Never have I ever hated being on the real housewives of Dallas. I can't do it, Dan. Not yet. Wait for the peacock reboot.

Yeah, just be Ronin' on. Don't hold your breath. Oh. Oh. So, you came at such a crazy time in the world and also in a crazy time of housewives because it was the first time that Bravo was like, hey, everyone's not white. Yeah, it's crazy. So you were the first and it's crazy living in a world that's not white.

I mean, you're in a city that's not white. And it's like the TV network is just figuring out it's not all white. And so did you feel like kind of an odd experiment, like kind of they're throwing you into this odd experiment and just seeing how you do? Did you feel any kind of support in that way? You would probably need it being thrown into a situation really fast like that.

Yeah, no, no, no support question. Yeah. You know, when I, when my friend, Deandra, asked me to be on the show, she built it to me as a fun and fluffy show where I could let my hair down and we'd get invited to these fashion red carpet events and I'd make these new girlfriends and every year they would take you on a fabulous international trip. And I was like, she asked me for three years before I finally said yes. And I was like, okay, I'll finally do it.

Well, that was right before COVID happened. My fabulous international cash trip was to Oklahoma. Sorry if y'all from Oklahoma, but that ain't it for me. Talk about a place just figuring out just with and white people. Yes! Talk about a place just figuring out just within white people. Yay! Yay! And then they dropped little OME into all this and they were like, you be our token person of color.

Right. Explain racism to everyone. Right. Wait, no, now you're the racist for making fun of your own mother. And how was like, what? It seemed like Cameron took the lessons pretty well right she's doing great she understood yeah she's definitely understood the assignment you know what sparkle dog has to go through a lot too it's so hard like moving into a seven-million dollar house yeah

Yeah. Wait, no. Wait, three more. What if we don't get it? I have to get it back. Quirk. Quirk. What would she sew up set with Quirk? You killed my dog.

What would she say to you? Yeah, because Quirk, like, because like she went away to like to get her nails done and she came back and her dog was dead. Quirk. We're horrible. Dumblown. That's terrible. I mean.

Yeah, so that was a lot so Don't mean to drag it into the most negative place ever It was fun in some moments. I don't mean to like Where the highlights what were the highlights? What were the fun parts? My birthday party where I blocked out. Oh, that was a good one And then the whole scene where dandandra like cussed her mom out. That was. I was not present for that scene.

I know you saw me in the background stumbling around, but then when I watched that, I was like, oh my god Deandra, how could you? You're supposed to respect your elders. Yeah, right. Yeah, that was, that was it. Lift it. I was like, I lived this scene.

I knew the whole street. You're fucking bitch. You're the standard. That was the scene where Mama D was like I lived this scene. I knew the whole spread You're fucking bitch Her mama D was like what your name was caliber. He's how you want a secret way to stop the and she's like mother Yes, when she's so good mama D was like well girls what you really need to know is The way to get a man wait outside his hotel Sit on the curb. Pretend you're pregnant. It's like, wait a minute.

Wait a minute, Mama. Murder his staff. It's like, OK, it's good dark. Oh, god, I do. But yeah, so I've noticed on Instagram, you're actually friends with a lot of the real housewives. Did you guys, did you meet just kind of at events and stuff, the different cities? Yes. when Dallas was airing, I had a lot of the other

housewives OG and relatively new ones like Crystal Kungming, Koff and Ebony reach out to me and be like, girl, we are on your side. Like we are watching this shit go down and we feel for you. Like how do you feel? Are you okay? Do you want to talk about it? And like, no, I don't want to talk about it. So I'm now friends with a lot of housewives, even though before becoming a housewife, I never really was a watcher of the franchise. Oh, you sucker.

You're an absolute sucker. That's how they get people like you. Because you know, as a watcher, you watch the show and you're like, how did they get her, you know? Right. Because you really don't watch. because a lot of people say they don't watch I really didn't watch okay I believe you is there anyone that like your wine? is there anyone that you would like want to meet or become friends with in like the real house

wives extended universe? I mean people always ask me if I could join another cast which one would I join and it's Beverly Hills like no now they have the best fashion. I think you'd be great on Beverly Hills actually. I'm actually friends with Crystal and Lisa. This is Lisa Rina lip kit by the way. Oh. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. This is a mix of.

Hashtag not sponsored. Where people putting lip gloss on in your bathroom. No, and it's weird. You feel like you're in a little sorority kind of. I met Megan King Edmond. Oh, Megan King Edmond. From the real house. I don't.

Or in my room. So then, the first bedded, or like a ooo. But when I met her, she was just a new girl that I was meeting. like I didn't know that she like got married a lot or got divorced a lot I Didn't know that I just met her and it event and she was lovely She is lovely, you know, she's I didn't have these pre preconceived notions She's iconic. You know how gay people are always like gay bravo people. I mean like we're not gay bra Yeah, you know gay people but usually mean, like we're not gay bravo. Yeah, they're gay bravo people.

But usually it's like, oh my god, icon glitter. She's amazing. Angel, she is iconic because she exposed Vicky's fiance's fake cancer. Oh. And every time that season she would come on to expose something, she would wear this headband. Yes.

And it was like, like a very, just like, I'm a conservative, but it was like, I know the truth. It was like the just we called it the justice headband. So we will always respect Megan King. And then she came back like two seasons ago on OC and she was wearing like a train conductor's hat. Yeah, you like you got to respect that, you know. See, I don't I don't know them as housewives. They just meet them as people at events that I go to.

And it's weird. And people are like, ooh, don't be friends with her. She's got all this blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, you know, let me just meet someone and find out for myself. And they're like, okay, you find out for yourself then. Yeah, that's a journey, you know? That backstage, you did mention that you are a big fan

of another franchise that may have just finished its second amazing season. Yes, yes. It's real house of Salt Lake City. It's because it's the only... Salt Lake City is the only franchise that I've watched from season one. Right? So I never watched any of the shows before I was on, so when they talk about like these, you know, did you do lines of cocaine in the bathroom? I'm like, what are you talking about? But for assault, Lane? You're a current. I'm current and I know and I don't have to watch like 10

seasons ago. Right. Do you have any favorites on the show? I don't. I know I love Whitney for her comedic relief. Um. What? What? Time to start the show. What happened? Really good. Thanks for the candle back. You know, Jenny and I were friends for a minute

until I figured out that she was not a good person. Yeah. Um. She was unhelpable. Um. Yeah. You know, but I like their dynamic. Their dynamic is amazing.

Like, had we had we have been able to have that sort of dynamic, we would not have gotten canceled. Dude, would you ever wear Brooks Marks Tracks? Oh! I have! Brooks Marks sent me a truck suit, and I wore it! Oh shit, oh we got one right over there. We got one over there. Yeah.

I say those gays and then I'm like double snapping clapping. We're like, those bravo gays. Yeah. That's a big surprise. I support Brooks. Yeah. Yes. I support Brooks and all of the other kids' businesses

on that show. By the way, I also just want to say before we wrap up, you have literally the two cutest children on all of Bravo. Really do. business is on that show. By the way, I also just want to say before we wrap up, you have literally the two cutest children on all of Bravo. You show me not beyond, but they are adorable. So congrats on having cute kids. You guys want to do one last toast? One last toast, 10 years in Tiffany Moon, guys.

Cheers! Cheers. Cheers guys, oh my gosh. Cheers to Tiffany Moon and your next chapter of the journey of journey. I have no clue what's going to happen. Everyone go by her wine and her candles, OK? Tiffany, thank you so much for coming on to send off the tour.

Thank you guys so much. Thank you so much. Wow. Wow. Thank you Tiffany Moon. That was great. I love her. So good. She's so beautiful in real life. I don't know what I'm expecting. You know, if like I'm expecting you to come up here and just be fagged, like after you've been beautiful on TV. Watch a lot of science fiction. Even more beautiful in real life. But tonight we planned on keeping you here for five hours. So that's what you're wondering. I feel like a lot of husbands just turned to their wives and said, how long could this supposed to be?

Yeah. It's like church, you never fucking know. OK. Oh, and by the way, do I see a super premium sponsor in the audience? Is that? I don't know. It's Brando Silva everyone! Brando Silva!

You must be exhausted. You've been on this tour as long as we have. So for the final time this tour Welcome to watch for crap ends a podcast, but all that crap on bravo that we just love to talk about Coming up on the reunion For the real how flying the one You're very offended by the word pornography. It's not pornography! I think Mariam Webster, who's a dear close friend of mine, would beg to disagree. I'm not an narcissist, Andy.

In your studio, do you have pictures of yourself? Yeah, but I'm also a narcissist! You know, I just like I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, Can you make the dog look at me make the dog look at me make the dog look at me Me the dog better. Can you kiss the dog? Kiss the dog. Can you kiss the dog? I like a dog. How do you like a dog? Watch me. I just peed on the floor. It's hard. I'm peeing. I'm peeing.

I'm fetching. Oh. Wow. I could have blown up your family, Shannon B. Dorr. I knew David was having an affair. And he knew David was having an affair. You knew David was having an affair. And he knew David was having an affair. You knew David was having an affair. The taco truck outside of Alfredo's new, you were having an affair.

Oh! Unfucking, unbelievable! Oh! And soon. Oh! Oh! So we opened this reunion with the new Bravo thing where they show the backstage shots, like inside the never going to be an actor studio.

Which is fitting, because we start with Heather. By the way, I've been drinking a lot less. I don't go sober or anything like that. Okay, I'm not insane. But I've been drinking a lot less. I didn't go sober or anything like that. Okay, I'm not insane. But I've been drinking a lot less, but not tonight. So, yeah. If anything seems off, that's why. This is, I mean, this wine is good, guys.

Especially within natural mix or teetos. Oh. So Heather shows up with her little gold lunch box which she's holding up to her face. You know, like, hello, this is how I came out of cars. And sewing off her fancy chocolate, which I didn't even Google the fucking chocolate. If I don't know your chocolate, you're not.

Yeah. OK. I'm surprised it wasn't chicken. You know, because Jen and I have a joke about chicken. You know, she ate it once. It's hilarious. And then we cut what we cut to what I really need in the reunion, which is Shannon already sobbing in the makeup chair.

I know. I know, like doing her makeup, stretching her face back, you know. Whoa. And she's like, you're not gonna believe this. I don't even have a dress to wear to the reunion! It didn't work out with bones! How can you not trust somebody named bones? I then know I was in the corner saying, bloop!

My first reunion! I'm popping that cherry girl! What that cherry? Let's reunion, pop in the cherry grove. What the cherry? Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, um, so I don't have any shoes or a dress and well to be honest, I mean my marriage is long gone I mean lots of things are missing and uh oh Is this not the oh I'm really sure if you call the right Rachel ma'am I'm Rachel Smith. Oh, I'm I'm I'm so sorry. All right. Well, let me try again Rachel Rachel Rachel! Rachel! I bet the rug's still great! I don't know what to do!

I'm sorry we are on the air right now. We're about to expose something huge! Rachel Maddow? Yes it is and you're on... Rang out loud! Hi, um, hi is okay. Let me tell you something. My dress is missing and I need to get a dress as this Rachel! Girl, that's bananas. That's the threat.

Shuh, shuh. Oh good, are you a stylist by any chance? This Rachel, please tell me that this is Rachel. Listen, I don't know about your shoes, but my father tricked my husband Jacob into marrying my sister, Leah. Is this Rachel from the Bible? Who is there never in my phone? Someone has to have my dress.

Okay, hello. Hi, this is Shannon Bedora of Television's Real Housewives of Orange County. I am looking for a dress in a nice flattering silhouette. Is there something that you can help me with Rachel? Well, I got some EVO for you instead. Oh, it's Rachel Ray Max and what of Rachel's on my phone? A lot of Rachel's. Poor Shannon. What a fucking mess. So then Shannon's like, oh, you know what? I've got to stop and get some water, I've got some cotton mouth.

And then they cut to a shot of Emily, like, oh, I don't know how I got this nosebleed. They're so open with the drug use now on real house. I've gotten mouth and nosebleeds. Someone's like, you know the bend in my elbows really scabby. Can I get some makeup for this? Great. So they all get makeup for this? Great. So they all get together, they all arrive. And by the way, after all that dress drama,

I have to say, I thought Shannon's dress with the best dress she's ever had. She looked amazing. So you know what, thank you Rachel. She looked like a chicken pox going to prom. People talking about, that was a pink sparkly Packs the lot of Shannon I love it. I really did like it. I'm someone wearing a T-shirt and a little navy so I will I will remember that as I sling arrows and other

people but welcome to the real housewives of all in town and season 16. Joining me are the dynamic women and Dr. Jen of the OC who proves again and again that the show that's hard all is still Worth no Week Even though the juice is basically just dried up tank powder by now and we all know it Heather It's amazing to have you back after all these years can you believe it's been six seasons since we sat together We're a reunion and it cuts the her being like I have frozen embryos in my wall

I've immortalized my four frozen embryos in the etched Window in my home each bird represents a popsicle version of an embryo, which is why it's etched and not stained and in Kelly Dodd Is there to like oh? Oh How could you talk about it? I'm black actually Actually, Andy, it's very funny because it's the 10-year anniversary of when I started this show, and it's also the 7-year anniversary of when I shoved Wendy Malik into a wall on the set of hot and Cleveland. You know it's really sad.

Wouldn't you have to remind somebody it's your 10-year anniversary? I mean, it made me so warm inside that Heather had to be like, you know, Andy, it's our 10 year anniversary. And he was like, he's like, I've been here five minutes, and I'm already exhausted. OK, I don't have time for this set. Man, this is what Jaden is going while I'm back there. I mean, this Instagram bin looked at it and it said I don't make music for the ears

I make it for the soul. Well my hair my ears are hanging. Are we sure it's Jaden and not just the OC Reels back there? Do you ever want to know explanations? I go wherever I want as long as there are no poor people there. That song, by the way, is amazing. And the two of us have been listening to it nonstop for five days now, okay? I feel amazing. You know what I mean? Like, I feel like you guys know that we've been listening to this nonstop. I'm trying to make it happen.

I look at all the non-shot capping, like, Queens. Don't make this harder for us and it needs to be. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crap. Celebrity Beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife. And I'm Sydney Battle. And we're the host of Wonder e's new podcast, Dis and Tell.

Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the build-up, why it happened, and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feud say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon.

Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums. Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon music or wonder yet. That's commercial. So Heather's like yeah it's our 10th anniversary Andy and Andy's like you a just thing. Rolling by night claimation films from Tim Burton movies really don't A!

Hey, Gina! You look fantastic, especially the hair! Looks like Supercuts is still in business! Congratulations on all the money you saved on that outfit! And you know of course every year we give you props on incrementally improving your hair. You'll get there, you'll get keep-blogged trucking, Jeno! Hey, Emily. Congratulations on your 13th wedding anniversary. What a lucky number 13! I'm in the bathroom.

You're still married to a frog. Annie knew that when he was gonna turn into a prince? You know, we know he's great. You know, we just lift each other up. Well, I don't really lift him up. It's more like the bar comes down for him, if you know what I'm saying. But that counts. It's the same net difference. Shannin!

Poxyn went to prom in a good way. Did Heather, your drug dealer give you some drugs? I'm so happy left so I'm going to put my shoulders out my ears and go, yeah! Yeah! Yeah! No! I'm so happy. I'm so happy. I'm so happy. I'm in real life. I'm so happy. I've never been happier to have my daughters leaving me home alone and not married in a kitchen

that hasn't oven around the corner in the hallway and no chandelier or basketball court in the basement. So happy! I'm so happy! I'm so happy! I'm so happy. She's like tied up in the back of a boat. I know. I'm dizzy now from that. So I got to jam. Everyone surprised you're an actual human being and not a beta tester flesh box And she's like Thanks, Abby. Thanks Thanks for having me here

Thanks, Abby. He's like, so you're selling your house. Are we gonna assume that Ryan is gonna move with you? And she's like time will tell Andy Ryan is gonna move with you and she's like time will tell Andy But you're joking of course, right? Have you ever known me to tell a fucking joke Andy ever? Jen just say we're working on it. Have you ever smelled the smell of snow? Snow smells Andy. Snow smells. All right, we'll work on that. We'll work on that. Well, I hope you brought a stack of receipts and not a stack of adjoiners. Oh! Oh!

She's like, I'll take the ladder, Andy. Sandi. Sack of receipts, okay. No, I'll take a ladder to get on top of the stack of adjoiners, Andy. I'm on the top now. Girlpower, am I right, girl? Woo-hoo!

Wow, well, this year our set is a little different. It's more hideous than it's ever been before. We are surrounded by icons of Orange County. We got the island's in Beach Peer. We got the place where Shane Geo cursed out his mom, we got the marshals, we're Gretchen Rossi, got her decor, we got tires that are used to melt, inject into people's faces, we've got that painting

of scores of people botulism killed before we learned it could be used to freeze all faces, and to top it all off. Tammy Nicarbocker's original gates that open in the opening of the shop. Literally the saddest flashback we have ever seen. It's just Tammy in like 2007 before the market even turned and she's behind the gate. Have cell phones then. She's just like behind the gates being like, I live there once.

It was sad. She gets out of her car because she can't get through the gates, you know, poor thing. And they're watching the gates close. And she's like, yeah, you know, I really don't miss the money. Fucking liar. It's like, boom, boom, boom, boom. You know, I really don't miss like the money fucking liar It's like boom The live detectors I just missed a lifestyle, you know like I love my kids and

It's like did you lose your kid? I know that they take your kids at the same time they took the gates I think it was Bravo's way of showing us that this show has always depressed the shit out of us Yes, yes, we're like why isn't this show more fun? And it was like, this shit was never fun. You sick, dark fucks. It was also a reminder that we once had a house while I looked like the lead singer of Journey. I thought that was cool. So after a long I ate as from the show

where she may or may not have gotten lost inside her house, had the Dubro made her triumph and returned to Orange County. So we now see the montage. She's still living a sterile Mac Mansion before, and then she paid 900 million dollars to look to move into a house that looked like a blown up version of the lobby of a I had plays! Ha ha ha! Other than Woow! Roll the clap! Roll the clap! You're not supposed to make me cry at the top of the show! Like, well, you have to cry at the top of the show.

You know, it's the second hardest job in the world, being a mother. The first is being the person that actually raises all of the children. Ha ha! Thankfully it's not me. And the third is the person who has to be passing the hors d'oeuvres at our parties. Never stop, never stop. The fourth is trying to get Reba the set when she's trying to finish a game of candy question or trailer. Okay, that woman can be a real diva Andy.

So Kelly from Coco Beach, Florida says, Heather, I thought you were a total ice queen, but seeing you, your daughters, warm my heart, you're the mother of the year, sign Terry DeBro, that's weird. You know, I thought you were a cop, fitness with no hearts, no feelings, real emotions, and you're possibly a sociopath, and then dot, dot, dot dot what a weird way to end and tweet Heather? Heather DeBrow, we love the way you do parties and even though you did put into MooseBooge as the second item on the menu you are great and we love you signed Mary Kudrow. Wow. Oh I wasn't expecting that question thank you so much.

So he's like, what do you like to have two kids who are out of the closet, ever? And she's like, I'm just glad to provide them with a very large closet, Andy. So if they're comfortable coming out, they can come out. If they want to stay in, there's plenty of decent clothing that they can choose from. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. And you're like what it's that look it's like I've got the fish. I'm gonna stay strong and I'm gonna bang his head against a rock

Totally normal totally normal And he's like well, I remember when I came out to my mom Hi, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, this ain't about you Queen. We know you've got 10 books about it So then no well, so then he's like no well No, well as a bisexual woman, I had a field of sea Heatherlies, motherly, such like, oh, I love it. I said, I love your daughter is bisexual. Now she knows what it's like to be like, oh,

credenza. However, you and Terry had issues, but now you're great! So how did you get to this place? He built her a $50 million home. At the fact you think they got to this. That's the most expensive, I'm sorry I complained about carpooling those little fucking monsters we created that I've ever seen in my life. And then Heather literally does the same monologue she did in her confessional or some part during the season.

She's like, well, you know, we have good days. We have bad days. We have good years. We have bad years. We have porches. We have Teslas. Yeah. And then we see the clips of this.

She's like, the worst times we've ever been through have been on this show captured's like, the worst times we've ever been through have been on this show captured on camera, Andy. And we see them. And she's like, Terry, I'm going on vacation. You have to take the kids to school. And he goes, kill me. That's like her worst year of her life. It was because all of America saw us in a smaller house. It was terrible! Terrible. One acre, Andy. The worst year of my life. So, no, well, I made a splash with coach her, her marital ex-excavades, and possibly the

China slapping up against each other, and her husband's worth a year. So Shannon's just giving a look down like, well, I know I'm gonna get in trouble for no web of story lines, so let's just show clips of that. Let me just straighten up my dress a little bit and slide forward and then slide back again in my coat with my sofa. So that can forth to the lower half of the screen right now

to see if there's any, I, Kyron, that is offensive to me. Is it time for me to blow into an invisible straw? Because I'll do it. Shh. And shall I pass? No. So, we're not there yet, but we get there. Well, before you could say sweet James, this marriage is over.

So then we get to this Noella cliff, which Noella, my husband, Sweet James, the most amazing man who has ever created. Not only is he sexually attractive, he's the best partner. The best father. He chose the best font for his billboards on the freeways Whereas crash accident attorney signs that I've never seen him all along Flowers for noella flowers for noella He sent me to force papers to a flower delivery person So Andy's asking like oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, you know like Where they all start out and they're like oh the husband and the wife everybody love the husband They just loved him. He's the best guy in the neighborhood and then by minute 22

It's like and then he brutally murdered her and everybody I Love that kind of storyline and I love a housewives confession because that's how I look at it It's just a big mystery to me, you know I always feel like there's something to be like uncovered. And the whole thing about Noella is this whole season. She's like, oh, yeah, I met my husband in a hotel lobby. We liked each other so much. We fucked in the hotel.

And then we were married. And I was like, how? That's a hoe. Right? That's just like a hoe. It's not even in a judgy way. It's like that's a girl that you can go outside and smoke with. It's a very least.

I'm like, that's a hoe. That girl's going to have access to a plane one day. I'm going to befriend her. But not a pale sport. But then you find out, then there's all this gossip. And Wudau online, the famous French outlet news outlet. Wudau online is like headline French outlet news outlet. Wudau online, is like headline, Noelle Aho. And everyone's like, how dare you?

That she is Mabahoe, how dare you? That is not true. And then Noelle is like, oh, Mahoe. Mahoe. Yeah, I mean, I have to. I love a housewives confession. And she just breezes right through it. Yeah, I actually really appreciate the fact

that she just owned it. She's like, yeah, I met him on a web, so I was a 91, it's called Seeking Arrangement. How is that where you find people who can arrange the chairs in your new home? That sounds lovely. It's a lovely arrangement. They do flowers, they do the fruit and the flower arrangements. They get the moose bushes ready for the first course.

No, she's like, in the flower arrangement. Take out the moose bushes ready for the first course. No. She's like, you know, it's just, it's naughty. It's naughty, Andy. And he's like, Andy, of course, knows, because you know Andy's on all this shit. So, Andy's like, anything you put your dick on to be a member of, Andy is on. Like, on all these signs. Remember on Miami, he literally was like,

well, I do go on to only fans, because I was a little bit bored. And he's like, yeah, jacked off a few times during the pandemic, nothing to it. So he's like, thinking, range man, wow! And she's like, well, you know, I say, which I don't know why we're with that now,

I just thought it was funny. I say, I say, I say, I say, I say, I say, I'm me. Well, she makes it sound like it's like, oh, it's pretty normal. She goes, you know, there were attractive girls and wealthy men, and that's a standard, and that's all I normally knew. So I looked up, of course, seeking arrangement. I was like, man, we have to make a pack not to get a boner, we about to go on the seeking a rain. I haven't looked yet. I haven't looked. We've seen all the gay shit like the scruff, the rar, whatever the bear what's the bear with? Oh yeah. Grindr scruff. Oh grinders. Oh grinders. Grindr scruff. No. On Grindr, they'll be like, you fat. You're fat. You're gross. So seeking a arrangement. Okay. So seeking a range. Sorry. It just becomes too personal. I'm going

to be crying by the end of the set. I know. It's getting very confessional. We've been through a lot. That is not out. Okay, so seeking arrangement is seeking arrangement illegal. Okay. Of course, you need to ask the questions. Okay, don't just put seeking arrangement. Be like, is Noella home? And it says it says okay seeking arrangement though re through wait the research about sugar dating is relatively limited the analysis of prostitution laws and sugar dating practices that do exist have a I love that Heather DeBro wrote this yeah the majority of sugar dating and other similar sex for money mutually beneficial arrangements are illegal as they are

forms of prostitution. Okay, so all that aside, prostitution should be legal in the first place. If you want to fuck me and you're uglier than me, I deserve something in return that's just how it works. What are we going to change capitalism now? Come on! Capitalism now come on The point is no well-earned met the love of her life on seeking arrangement People fall in love as a waiter all the time if I'm waiting on this hot guy down in the front and I fall in love with him Is it somehow bad because he gave me a tip? No, you know you can meet people at work for fuck's sake, team Noelle on this one for sure

Seeking arrangement more like seeking derange man. Am I right everyone? Okay? I've seen pretty woman. I think Julia Roberts deserved to be happy Maybe so Not the real one the real ones rude Michael the real ones totally rude, but the fake one So do I like it this weird thing? She's like, well, you know, once we realized that we could have children, we did have got the ring of the sound, like an old wedding thing, you know.

Like so, you took photos of a fake wedding so that we could tell your friends. This was my favorite part. Well, you know, a piece of paper doesn't so we could tell your friends. This was my favorite part. Well, you know a piece of paper Doesn't mean anything to me Andy now. She's not talking about marriage You know most people are like or cash you don't need to get married. I don't need a piece of paper She's talking about divorce. I don't need a piece of paper Andy to make divorce real to me I'm like the wife did I mean, but the wife did no Ella. She needed the piece of paper

So she's making it this romantic thing. Well, you know what? I mean, I don't care about the actual piece of paper for the divorce. We waited four years to cheat on his wife. Before we pretended to get married on a beach, Andy. And so she goes, for anybody who's accusing me of only being with him for money.

And Andy's like, uh, well, you didn't care about the money. You met him on a website for attractive women meeting wealthy guys. Yeah, that's well, he cared about whether or not I was attractive. And I was like, thank you. I love capitalism being explained. I just think it's crazy that after all this, she's like, you know, I wasn't in it for the money I'm like you were on seeking arrangement. Yeah

So what being it for the money is still like the guy, okay? I slept with the bagging person to the grocery store. I loved it He got a dairy queen out of it and in more ways than one. I mean he got me You know when they actually got a peanut buster barfay parfay one. I mean, he got me, you know, when they actually got a peanut buster barfay, parfait. When this segment came on, I was like, Ronnie is going to just run around his hotel room for 10 minutes. He's gonna get so excited by it, like, novella and all this stuff. I was like, finally, a season's worth of validation. Yes, I love a confess. And you know,

I've been reading this shit off season, like, Oh my god, novella was a hoe. And then she found this guy and then now she's pretending that he left her, but he didn't really leave her she really left him it's all gone And it's all true and noella's just like whatever who cares It's time for commercial. It's time for a crap and commercial Well you told Gina that you were not considering divorce only to be served papers a few days later, your ex-mantains, you are going to file for separation before he filed. Because this is the whole he said, she said.

So Emily's like, well, you know what, they claimed they received notice from the attorney representative. Hold on, let me translate this for Shane. Mommy, daddy, separating, divorce, Puerto Rico, California race papers money and okay Shane okay Loyal to lawyer basically Craig Connover she's like the lawyer that nobody actually called but just keeps showing up the court You know like what are you doing here sir and he's like objection You know, it's like what are you doing here sir and he's like objection That is a double line so underlube on that bill They're like we're not talking about

So please wait outside so Emily shows up and just starts defending some case She's not involved in at all which is typical because she's not involved in shit this season except you know The stuff that she's making up in her fucking crazy squinty-eyed little head, okay? So she comes in that she's making up in her fucking crazy squinty-eyed little head, okay? So she comes in and she's like, yeah, but he claims that he filed in Puerto Rico because he was trying to get jurisdiction in Puerto Rico, and that's why it was a race to see where jurisdiction could be established, because he was trying, he wasn't trouble with taxes, and then he was trying to get taxed in Puerto Rico, so then you moved to Puerto Rico with your family And he stayed a you established citizen ship in Puerto Rico, and that's why he did it I'm like sounds fucking smart to me. I mean the man owed millions and taxes

So he moved to Puerto Rico so he didn't have to pay them and know well I was like fuck yeah, I don't want to pay taxes with money. I could be buying purses with so she went with him Then she got cast in the show and came back to LA to do the show. He didn't want to come, so she said, buy ugly person with money. Do you know how many homely people I could fuck for their planes in Orange County? Bye! Adios, bitch! And what was his reaction to you joining this show?

Oh, he was ecstatic. He was so exotic. He sent me flowers every day, but I kept forgetting to get them. You know? So he maintains on social media that part of the problem was that you went all in on the show. And he goes, she, now I know all he goes, well, you know, if you had a problem with it,

like he never once took me to the side and listen babe I can't do this it can damage our family and everyone's like no he guarantee he definitely said that many times well look he wanted her to do the show he was trying to get her on the show for years she finally did but he couldn't do it because he was going to go to prison. So he was in Puerto Rico. She is like, I'm not, I'm going to go beyond TV. And he's like, okay, so she filed separation then he filed divorce. Then she came on the TV show and made herself a victim of divorce in a storyline. She sounds like a fucking mastermind to me. Like, who's arguing with her, especially in Orange County?

Okay, like I'm sorry that you're jealous, you married Shane. You know what I mean? So the Andy is like, so you're saying that like basically if he said he didn't wanna be on the show, you would have stayed with him and you go, yeah, am I like my plane? I love my husband.

Oh, and my child. It's like, wow, plane was number one on that list, everyone. plane was number one. Well, who wants to fly their child in coats? I mean, if you ever want to realize how much you hate your child, fly with him in coats, okay? She knows the important order. So Emily, this whole time, is like,

oh, because I have the paperwork and I'm a lawyer! What kind of lawyer are you? What do you actually do? Because I have not seen any proof of your lawyer ring. Now I'm not saying you're not a lawyer. What the fuck kind of lawyer are you? Are you that kind of lawyer you call when you have a parking ticket and you pay them, you know, a few hundred dollars to get rid of? What kind? Because I haven't seen proof yet. Shut up Emily, This is not your case

Maybe it's maritime law You know you can't your you didn't claim your pills Emily You know what you know what seeking arrangement is not allowed in maritime law. I'm sorry so So salmon's like well, I just want to remind everybody that it is very difficult for me to be sitting here and listening to you, not believe no other story about being divorced because I have been divorced from the man named David, and it hurt me, down into my soul, it hurt me, it crushed me. Merlick. Why are you talking? I know. She's like, I'm ready to pivot this back to my part of the show, please.

Thank you. Thank you very much. So, Newell is like, yeah, I'm a leot's creepy. And Newell is like, oh, it's creepy. It's not creepy for me as an attorney who passed the bar at the fair and square to look at your case from a legal standpoint. And then while I was like, well, I love this part

of the show. I'm like, run, run, run, run, run, run. It is, yeah. Emily and Noella in one season for us is a lot of Teddy. It's like a lot. That's a lot. And then Dr. Jen and the mix is a lot of, hmm, it's like a bassoon concert.

I know, after recaps, we're like, why are we yawning? So we're like, hmm, no, when you start to yawning, but then you yawning like five times. I know. So then we get into the controversy about Puerto Rico, okay, because I asked him about this place in Puerto Rican, like, well, so why did you go?

Why did you, basically comes out that Nahuela and James moved to Puerto Rico before the show, and so Nahuala was like, why did you, I basically comes out that Nauela and James moved to Puerto Rico before the show. And so Nauela was like, well, you know with all the closures in California, I'm like, what a Baja fresh. Like, what are you talking about? And Emily's like, that was sad though, that was sad. And Emily is like, well, is turning a release of Siamon that like you moved to PR, like Puerto Rico as a family

and became citizens of Puerto Rico. And she's like, well, I mean a release of Siamen that like you moved to PR, like Puerto Rico as a family and became citizens of Puerto Rico? And Chant's like, well, I mean, I don't see, like, it's not crazy, I mean, like, you know, like, I don't see what's outrageous to have to homes, you know. Some people have a second home, some husbands even have a second woman, you know, it's just... People have a lot of second things, you know? And Emily's like, What I'm trying to establish here, Your Honor, is that you moved to Puerto Rico, you became citizens of Puerto Rico, you did an Instagram in the bikini with your ankle behind your head, about moving to Puerto Rico,

and they show the picture of Noella, like literally her head is like this, and she's like, moved to Rico. Oh, new resident. And Emily's like laying out this case. She's like, well, it was Sean, it was abstentated by evidence that was Sean on Instagram. And they cut to Gina, and Gina's like, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

She cannot follow. She has no idea what happened the past 10 minutes. She's like, ha ha ha ha ha ha. Nina's so strong, she just wants it gets to court things. She's just like, bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz His signs are in California. He cheated on his wife and pregnant me off a sugar daddy website in California. Welcome to California, right? Hey, I think actually this set does have the hammock where Sweet James cheated on you three times. So Andy's like, so what's the status of your marriage now?

And she's like, well, a fish win of worst. And now we're deciding costumay. But the cool thing is that now I can get married. And Heather just squins it. Heather's hates this. Heather's like, how could you fix your state without coming on the 7th year stitch? I mean, Heather's eyebrows are fully arched

like all the way. She's just like, her thin lip. So Andy's like, so I hear you have a hot new young guy. Let's see those chisel abs and that chest. And we see a photo of Nauwela with literally, it's like Guy Fieri had a love child with Fred Durst. Nauwela. with literally, it's like Guy Fieri had a love child with Fred Dursd. No, Ella. It's like someone to Guy Fieri by the ankles and just like started pounding him in the

body. They can grease into spare, you know. He smells like bar-a. The guy's like, eh. He's like, just got off work at Dick's Sporting Goods. I was like, listen, Noah, despite everything else, Sweet James was a dick, and I wanted her to get some real hot dick, and then this is what you do.

Come on, Noah. I don't think that's how it works. No, daddy issues. Well, money issues. Money issues, sir. Aren't they the same thing? I don't know. I don't know.

OK, so let's see. So she shows this guy, and so we're like, okay, so you're with someone new, right? And she's like, yes, Bobby! He's 33! She does her like, Jimmy Lap thing or she's laughing like everyone's laughing with her, but nobody is. But there's like, fucking die. They all hate her. But there's like, I fucking died, they all hate her. So Andy's like, well I heard he bought you a company and she goes, oh my god, Andy! Oh, oh, oh, DeBro doing like a really performative inhale she's like Heather DeBro is like my husband has bought me about 12 companies so

getting lined did so of course and no one was, we're gonna get trademarked. But it's a dildo company. Of course, of course, a Bobby, the ever romantic Prince Charming's like, hey baby, you want a dildo company? Welcome to Flavitown, honey. And she goes, what can I say, I'm good. So then, basically, the headlight, how there goes well, it's a good stack apparently. It was a reference to the stack of vaginas. Can I do my chicken joke yet?

I've been holding this bucket of chicken forever. So no, Alice is like, well I think well unfortunately, Bomby, he says the laws of flavor town are that you can't cheat. So I think my stack of a John Adays are tired. I'm sure. Yeah, Bobby really looks like a one woman man. Yeah, right. He's like, listen, we've got three different hepatitises. All right, babe.

We're going to like keep the circle tight. Alright. So the next segment, well first I just have to give Noel, because this is kind of the end of Noel's segment, but like congratulations you fucking looney-tune. You came on to the, I thought I was gonna absolutely hate this person. I kind of feel like I should morally, but she's done a great job pissing off Heather Dubro. Yeah, I love. No, Walla has earned her spot. She's crazy. I'm not asking you guys to be friends with her. I'm just saying appreciate her chaos. Yeah, I'll just appreciate what none of us like Sackarin, but we all drink a diet coke now Some things are necessary she does not give a fuck and she owned every lie while adding new lies on top of those lies Yeah, it loves I pie. It's like a lie casserole and a southerner. I

Don't appreciate a good casserole Thank you for the lot. No one made me a casserole Okay, so now we go on to- Hey! This season, Heather and Shannon's attempts to start fresh was spoiled by old rumors and much like a table of ontar sushi that's not on a naked woman. Get a job. Get a job. It seemed like their friendship was quickly going wrong.

Go go! I'm sorry to be disgusting, but can we not move from stack of vaginas into ranks? Is she right away? Can I have a break? I mean, they are so gross on this show. And you know they did it on purpose, just to trigger me. So they do a montage. They show montage or Shannon Heathers, like, you know, like up and down relationship.

And of course, you knew they had to do it. They do it like five times this episode, the montage, the montage, it's like the montage is like oh it's so great to reconnect. Oh it's I miss you it's been so many years. You are just you know we've always just got like if you ever come for me or my family again This will cost you more than my friendship So Andy's big question like after all this drama of the sushi party is where did the sushi go We haven't do it and she's like, you know, we went to poor people Andy, okay? They refuse to eat from cans now, which is why you never give poor people elevated food. You know, we're really trying to get Coco into

Havroford, so we had her distribute sushi to the poor and took many photos of it. It's going to go in her new book called Feeding Fish to the People. Thank you, Andy. Thank you. So the next segment is all the one that got away, Nicole James. Yes. For those of you who don't watch this show, so this girl comes on named Nicole. And Shannon knows Nicole from, I don't know, some dog park or something, okay? And Shannon heard that Nicole, back in the old day when she was trying to be Pamela Lee

and getting like, you know, like trunks put in her boobs. Like literal trunk compartments, you just wave your ankle under and the trunk open. You know, you can see it in there. It's got a spared huge, had a botched boobs job by Terry Dubrow. So Sam and her this rumor and told the girls off camera drunk and then the girls went and tattled because they realized how rich Heather was and they were like have a Shannon It's trying to make it look like a husband's a bad surgeon on TV and that's when Heather brings out her if you ever

Mess with me or my family So that's the explanation so here here we are in the Nicole James fights. Yeah, so basically, so Judy from Judy Town asked, at the beginning of the season, Shannon, you seem really hopeful about your friendship with Heather. So why mention the lawsuit to Gina and Emily in Shannon's like, well, I didn't know it was the same girl because that girl was young and slubby like someone who would walk on a beach with my husband. I was like, oh, I loved you in Van Wilder, but then it turns out I was like, I saw this girl and she looked lost and displaced and I saw the look of sadness in her eyes. I was like, well, that does remind me of a younger slut from my past, but I wasn't sure. I had no idea if it was the same girl.

And so then they show a clip. And he's like, really, Shannon, you sure you're not long? I'm like, nope, nope, nope, nope. Was it the same girl? No, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Is it the same girl?

No. Did I know? No. Is it the same girl? No. Did I know? No. Could it be? Yes. So she has a picture. And so we see this picture of Nicole in 2003. It was like looking at...

It's all of us in 2000. Yeah. Like, look at your ship from 2000. We're all like... It was like... If someone took like an extra from bring it on and put like the long Island medium hair on her Lynn doobs lived it but they cut they're like Shannon and you lying it's like nope and then they cut to a scene of Shannon and how they're having

months and Shannon's like whoa back when I'm unique we sl Weasler, she looked totally different, like Pam Anderson Lee. I was like, a cot Shannon. Like, did you not remember filming this scene? So, so she's like, I didn't know and I was hoping it was. I thought maybe they lost it, it was 20 years ago, you know, and Heather's like, but who cares? I mean, that was 20 years ago, it was dropped and she goes, well, by the way, Gina is the one who brought it up

at Havviere's. I'm sorry, I'm only familiar with Alfredo's. What is Havviere's? And she's like, yeah, well, Gina was the one who brought it up when Heather was in the bathroom, and I was like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, I'm going to do a double zipper mouth. No, no, no, no.

No. And Emily's like, what do you think, what Geno was trying to save that time? Let Geno respond. Let Geno respond. Well, I was encouraging you to do the right thing, Gen. And Geno's like, of course, Sam,

and it's like, well, what's the right thing then? Titsiel, have a, because it seemed like something you would try to plant the land. It's like, I would have never brought this up on camera! Emily would have, it was supposed to be for Emily. It's like when you plant a plant here and it grows in the yard next door. What am I supposed to do? I'm sorry, Blue Bonnet, so you fly. Hey, you have to know. Oh, no.

And she's like, you know what? And she's like, I assume didn't work down. I mean, they've been friends for years. I just didn't know that Heather DeBro was friends with Skanks. That's all. And so she's like, well, it's not that big of a deal. I'm like, don't know, Gina. You don't get to say it's not that big of a deal

after you cause all this drama, Gina. Yes. Because Gina was like, which person have a seat? The person's slightly richer than me tried to bring you down, but your mother richer than her, take the bitch down. Also, I love private planes, pink jackets, and skin care lines.

So whatever you could do, and skin care lines. So whatever you could do, whatever you could do. Thanks for the sushi, by the way. So then, Sha... Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Gina's got, like a Michael Cores from Marshall's Purseful of Old Sushi. It's a hard knock life. It is, it's a hard knock life.

It... Yeah. Ah, so, uh... life. It is. It's a hard knock life. So, uh, Shannon is just losing it. She's like, Oh, really? So it's me who started this whole thing. And I'm supposed to bring it up on camera. And I'm supposed to try ruin someone's life. And they're like, but you are, Shannon and she's like, how dare you? My favorite Shannon. And then she just stops and goes, Can I get some water because I'm pretty, I've got milk. I have a cotton melt, it's a condition I have.

It's a condition that comes from your children going to college and leaving you a home alone. I drink the water but then it doesn't, I drink it, it doesn't work. It's not. I, Shannon does the thing that I love. She is so whipped up and dizzy and she's like, stop interrupting me. I'm not gonna start yelling. I'm like literally all of our year drums are losing her fucking. And I love that, Shannon, because I love Shannon, right?

Yes. Obviously. We have been Shannon fans since the beginning, since the beginning. Shannon is really doggable and I know, you know, me saying I love Shannon after all the shit I've talked, but that's how I love. You know, it's my love language. Hey, Trit is my love language. So, but I love her, but I love that she's just such a Karen about everything. She can't even get through this without carrying out.

She's like, well, you know what? The water doesn't work the way it's supposed to. Can I get someone to fix the water? I mean, water that hydrates me. I'd like to speak to the manager of Sparklets, please. So Emily has this bullshit defense. This is the biggest bullshit defense, which I feel like it's such bullshit I should actually really appreciate it

because that's what I want on a reality show, a huge bullshit. So Emily goes, come on, Shannon, you know how this works? like it's such bullshit I should actually really appreciate it because that's what I want on a reality show a huge bullshit Samley goes Come on, Shannon, you know how this works you told two people on the show about two other people on the show with the Bet the very beginning of the season did you honestly think that would never come up? That's like bullshit to think that you pulled the pen in the grenade and you handed to Gina and me that's what you did I'm like no she gave you a grenade you guys pulled up in out and you guys threw it. Yes, she could have handed you the grenade, but you still ran into a mall house in detonated age.

Yeah, know what I mean? Shada was maybe Osama that doesn't make you not terrorists. She was, Shada was like, oh, well, I found this lovely decorative turtle, I believe. Would you like it as a gift? Oh, it even has a little, if you pull it, it's gonna say something, it'll say it like, oh, well I found this lovely decorative turtle I believe. Would you like it as a gift? Oh, it even has a little, if you pull it, it's going to say something. It'll say it like, hi, how happy would you like it? True.

It's the whole Vandarpom thing. It's like, you made me be a bitch. No, you, you a bitch already. I encouraged you, OK? It's called being a good friend, seeing potential in somebody, and encouraging more of it. So Heather's like, can we just take it down to the core of this of why I was upset? Oh you want it from the core? You want it from the core?

You want it from the core? For my core friends, it used to be five. Ha ha ha, tell them. Put the kai rams on, tell them. Listen, I got a lot of comments that are blaming me for like blaming me and Emily and Gina and not Shannon and also saying I was a great actress but whatever. And this is where the bullshit came. I love when gang, gang gets a good shot. I thought, ah! Listen, I auditioned for Frazier, okay? I was almost lilyth.

But they didn't like method actors, so. Unfortunately, that was the day I tried my cockney accent and unfortunately they didn't want Lilith to sound like, Oy Gavna. So they put me back in the attic and Syracuse. So anyway, so she's basically like, Oy Gavna. So they put me back in the attic and see it, just. So anyway, so she's basically like, look, listen, I met with you. I'm not mad that it came out.

I'm just mad because I met with you so many times. You just never brought it up. And then to be fair, it is kind of funny, because they cut the flashbacks of Shannon being like, oh, I'm so excited to see that Nicole again, and I just saw her social media and I saw that flashbacks Friday to 2003 and I was like, oh, who does that remind me of? Oh, gosh, I platinum blonde, you know, any back story there, Heather, are there any?

She goes, you had ample opportunity to tell me, Shannon. And Shannon's like, hell know, you would have broken, you would have screamed in anyway and blown up. I'm not gonna bring that to you on camera. Are you kidding me? And Heather's like, you broke the code, Shannon. My congratulations, Shannon. That's like the climax of every movie.

Like you did it, you broke the code, Shannon. Yeah, yeah, seriously, the net. We all remember that, 96. Oh, so after I love you. I know. Remember how long I took for her to get that stuff on that little floppy drive? She's like, hurry up, hurry up, they're coming, hurry up.

That was before even flash drives. And she's like, oh my god, I've taken a typing class. Am I going to get an Oscar for this? Oh, she died. Oh my god, we're almost online. So then, in her new movie, she's kind of playing a real housewife, Sandra Bullock. I was like, finally, you're coming down to my level. And she lives here right in Austin.

In Austin, right? So then, I met Texas. And the Bullock lives in Austin. What? What? So anyway, so, so Heather's like, Heather goes, listen, this in Austin? What? What? So anyway, so Heather's like, Lockers. Heather goes,

listen, this isn't some side hustle. I'm not making trucker hats. I was like, whoa, don't bring Robin Dixon into this. Oh shit, what the hell? I'm not having my husband drive around a garbage truck or pretending to flip homes. You are lucky. One one distant is not here. This is our bread and butter even though we don't eat in either of those things. You want

to bring up a lawsuit that could potentially damage my husband's career. I'm like, you know it'll damage your husband's career, the real housewives of Orange County. Yeah. Also, fucking up somebody's trunk boobs. Okay. If your husband doesn't want his career ruined, he should learn how to put a spare tire in a pair of boobs. Okay. So Shannon's like, well, I was only bringing it up because it didn't make sense. Which Shannon not able to take responsibility also kills me. I love it. So Heather, I just feel betrayed because you were the one good person that I left on good terms with. I texted you over the years. I texted when I heard you were getting divorced. Mm-hmm.

Oh my god. Is that it? How was that texting her over the years? Shannon doesn't need one text. She needs 18 texts. Yes. Yes, on a billboard. She James billboard. So yeah, Heather's basically, and then Heather says, the reason why she was so angry at Shannon versus the other girls is because the other girls

texted immediately to look at the rest, to get the private plan. Yes. And Shannon didn't. Corn lick her over for the other girl. So then Heather brings up the real ammunition. She goes, listen Shannon, the reason why I was super pissed was because eight years ago I protected your family, okay?

I gave them so much sushi, so much sushi. I knew David was having an affair and by the way you knew David was having an affair. The world knew David was having an affair and by the way you knew David was having an affair. The world knew David was having an affair. Well, by the way, she's right, we all knew David was having an affair, right? In the same way, we all know fucking Terry Dubros, fucking other people. We had no proof, but of course we all turned to each other and said, Of course he's fucking other people. You think Heather is his sex life

till death do us part, hell no. And if you don't believe me, you might wanna check out Bravo and cocktails on Instagram. So then we get a flashback to like a season like 12 reunion where Heather has various of your bangs. And we just see this great flashback of Shannon sitting with David and Shannon's like, yes, everything is fine and we're we're We're happier for me if ever ever been and we wake up every day and we we smile and I definitely do not have 30 to 40 negative thoughts a day I'm I'm happy. Happy person. A happy person. The way that you knew Shannon was full of it

was she would always look down to the ground, but lift her head like she was looking straight up at the camera. Should be like this. Well, David and I are very happy. I'm just spreading my way on here to make sure that everything is straight, but David and I are very, very happy.

Shannon with the worst lawyer. And then it cuts to David and he's like, well, here Shannon is an amazing woman. She's the best wife and of course all I think about incessantly is my children and my marriage. We are so happy and if I read sad it's only because I may have some cosmic debris in my rectum at the moment. David Betort makes him in it because you have to like marinate in the anger that's just seething there, the wide eye to anger where he's like, when my eye starts twitching, I'm

like, I got it. David Betort. So when Heather says this we come back and she'll go, how dare you? How dare you? I'm talking now. Excuse me, I'm a wealthy person. I give more tax breaks than you, everybody quiet. Did I give you Panda Expressor? Did I give you Nobu? My turn. So when she says Heather's like, yes, everyone knew that your husband was having affairs.

And I could have blown up your entire family. And I didn't. And Shannon goes, oh, wow. Thank you, Heather. Thank you very much, Heather. She says, you are welcome. So Shannon's been saying, because Heather's saying, like, we all knew he was having a affair. And Shannon was like, oh, well, oh, you're saying, I knew.

You're saying, I knew he had an affair. And then Jenna goes, well, actually, I didn't know he had an affair because we were going to a relationship with camp. And have you ever lied at a foam tombstone before? It's very revelatory. Here lies Shannon Bedore. So then Tula from Castorol says Heather how that you got off threatening Shannon like a mob boss when you look like all you can lead is a little bubble around a kitchen as a gerbil trying to run the hell away. And Heather's like, listen, how dare you?

Now you can't do it, right? It's how dare you! So Heather's like, I was very upset when it comes to my family, my nannies, Alfredo, or the sixth people in charge of running the pizza oven. Haha, I will get insane. This is my life's blood. You don't mess with them.

They said your husband gave a botched boob job, okay? Yeah, listen. Every cupcake maker just makes a little flat blob every once in a while, okay? We all make mistakes. Yeah, it's like as the legendary Karen Huger said, you have to make millions to lose millions. Mmm, it's a girl. Mmm.

So then just because it's fun out of nowhere, they just feel like if you ever, they just roll it again, they just roll it again. If you ever come from my family or the nobu sushi I gave to you. So she's like, Shannon's like, wow, Ben, because listen, you can try and overthrow a queen on these shows. You can try and make somebody look stupid. You can never outvictum Shannon B. Dore. Never.

Jesus Christ could not outvict him, Shannon Bedore. And he's like literally the most put upon martyr in the world. At least in my childhood. So Shannon's like, so then you threaten my family, the one thing that gets me to the one thing! Well, you know, there he is, Paulin. I know. I'm pollution. I'm pollution.

Missing reunion dresses, those will get me too. Yeah, I know. Those will get me very, very flat tie. I got a flat tie, or it was very dramatic. Oh, no, no, no. Cotton mixed with rayon. What a mix. When, Terry, I'm right.

When Kitty Coral left the today show, tears everywhere, everywhere! Hold a copy, told me to put tea bags over my eyes. They're still stained! I-I-yes, I, um, well, they were out of 80-20 ground beef, and it was just-I had to go to 85, and it was just-it was not right. Non-filtered air conditioning air homes built on non-diamond foundations. Shandleers without switches. That make it go up and down. Have you ever seen the smell without a home on its back?

Very, very. It looks like a crawling booger. Tears. Rootabaker. On these. Yeah. Who even came up with that word? So, uh, my-

But beyond all that, my children, uh, so then just put me on the that my children I am a single mother. I love I love how she said it though she goes the one thing that gets me teriyade are kids because I have them a hundred percent of the time. I just like the thought of Shannon just giving birth all the time. We're like, oh, I have kids 100% of the time. Here comes another one. I was just exhausted. She's just always having a baby.

Just wrapped one. How does that actually use the after-birth as moisturizer? Isn't she glowing? The doggers have nothing on me. Noella is so stunningly beautiful. That's why I said that. It's so rude, but she is so stemingly beautiful and well-moist. Like, she literally sits there and glows. I'm like, what are you using?

So then the Heather goes, the Heather's trying to now be like, Shannon, for the record. I would never ever sue you. Because I mean, honestly, what am I going to get? A Brett Michael's bandana. I mean, for crying out loud. What am I going to get? A rental house that looks like a long-drawn silvers? I can't. I mean, literally, you live inside an Instapot, OK? So she Heather mretens she's crying, which is so funny,

because I just feel like plants are dying all over the studio, you know? Every time Heather's like, oh, I have children. I understand you are a single mother, you know, and then a ficus just wilts Meanwhile Tammy Nicarbocker is appeared at the gates behind her like remember Remember Tammy Bocker Tammy Nicarbockacher at the set gates. I'm home. I made it home. I don't miss a lifestyle. This is my children, man.

Quinn Fry appears next to her. I'm a cougar. That's a deep cut, everyone. Thankfully, you know, I know this show is going a little long, so thankfully Emily and Gina are coming up. Because Gina would have to say about them. So, not much. You're welcome. You're welcome, husband. This season, Shane finally passed the bar technically, and celebrated all the bars, but no she actually did not. She like Got wedding photos. So then we get Emily's whole storyline this season is both like wow I'm like the biggest drunk of all time While also being like also I'm a lawyer and saying what are you doing? What are you trying to do this season?

Yeah, I need more focus from you man until you get arrested in Florida and then break out of your handcuffs and tell all the officers that they're gonna fucking die and get a baloney sandwich thrown in your head. You were not the biggest drunk of all time, ma'am. Ha! The way they treated me in that jail. I know what it's like to be incarcerated and the only thing that saved me was

Cabaret Kiddit boys So and he's like oh so and from an outsex as Emily was so fun this year I love when she told Shane he could beg her Gina what other wild things does to Kayla Emily do and Gina's like she's wearing two groceries Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you?

Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you?

Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? There's like nothing funny about it because they're talking about the innocence project But there actually was something funny because Emily's dude. That's really cool

Like it's really cool that she's participating in that she's doing that. She's volunteering like my hat is I don't have a Happ if I had it be off to her, you know But what made me laugh is that while Andy's like complimenting her on it out of nowhere Someone activated the Roomba on the side of the couch and Dr. Jen is like, oh, hey, an Emily, I could be an expert witness if you need a medical witness. Where the fuck is Dr. Jen being? All the sudden it's like, if you ever need a medical witness for any of these like innocence project case, yes, everybody's going to be innocence projects because they're bad filler, got them caught

in a life sentence, Jen. Oh, you know what's going to get them off the hook? If someone comes and gives them a cock, I Mamie brain scan out of nowhere. Your brain scan is telling me that you're innocent. Sorry. What? Listen, we still don't have proof that you're innocent, but your angry elevens are gone. So, you know what, go back out into society. We're ready.

You look less angry, so I think you'll be less angry. Let's go. If the glove doesn't fit You must use fillers Jesus that was the only like my favorite thing like just out of nowhere out of nowhere Dr. Jen offering her legal expertise So then we talk about you know Emily's like daddy issues Man, okay, you know, it's very sad. I don't care right now. I don't want to make fun of it.

So then we go over to, or we, oh God. So this is what I want to say about this entire segment. Gina, how Gina pronounces orthodontist is just not okay. Okay. I know that Gina is like pretending she's got some crazy thick accent where she's like every day she's like, oh, not that many syllables. is like pretending she's got some crazy thick accent where she's like every day she's like Not that many syllables in a word even the Hmong Island or Gina. We know

But Gina's whole Me and me went to the atada Like you went to see an author Donna what she write No one says that Not a city or a state and is a county. There's not even a county where they say So Andy and juices and he goes well after years of setbacks this season Gina was thriving Here's a setback. This season, Gina was thriving, driving, and looking all glowed up. Let's look at the new and improved Gina,

and then just cause to her being like, I need an exorcism. I'm not sure if you're a rebound. I just as a miss you rebound. Gina's whole storyline started two weeks ago. The extra system, her main storyline. So he's like, so what made you get that crazy thing where a lady came over and waved at a window and she's like, well, the ninth thing we came home from, Cabo, it was the middle

of the night and like, shwa, and I looked at my door and I saw something. Okay. It was my front door, a very small house. I was scared. Okay, it was my front door with very small house. I was scared. But she did say that right? She said it was the middle of the night. We'd been out.

I shot up and I heard something. Is that a quote? Is that what she said? Yeah, she's like... Confessions. There's drug confessions all over this episode. I'm telling you. It was, I saw it.

It was a little girl. And that's when I realized it's Mackenzie's child. I'm telling you. It was, I saw it, it was a little girl, and that's when I realized it's Mackenzie's child. I was terrified. So we talk about her demon storyline and stuff like that. And then Matt, like, how could you make up with Matt? She's like, why don't you roll that clip of the Aphodama scene again? So they do. And Matt's just like the hottest villain of all time. You know, like he's tarot. We all know that we hate Matt, you know, and the whole villain.

But then they show him and she's like, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah Like when you find somebody who can match your bad pronunciation of orthodontist, like it's love, you know what I mean, just admit it. By the way, I'm gonna go over to Jaden and be like, if you ever play your music loud again, you will lose more than my friendship. Listen here, Jackson. So, uh. Tina, pissed from Smelling Snow says, Gina, you and Heather's relationship is giving me life!

Literally nobody typed that ever on Twitter or anywhere else. No one. No one has like, I love Gina and Heather together. And I really liked it because when he says that, it gives Shannon the looking down, but I'm not mad look, opportunity, because he's like your relationship with Heather. It's amazing. And Shannon's like, oh, I'll just straighten out my dress.

One more time. OK. It's like the cat, the cat clock. You know that you see in movies. I have Felix. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, 20 o'clock. Woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, so then, so now Heather is trying to do! Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo- Where'd you buy that air mask bag?

You need to put a pin in it. You fucking asshole. Like clips of Shad and just losing her mind. So Andy gets a call from Benjamin, his baby, a little Benj. Little Ben. It was so cute. Hey, buddy. And he's like, hey, Danny, I'm in California.

Why are you doing Danny? I'm California. So cute. And he's like, I Danny, are you on California? Why are you doing Danny? And California? So cute. And he's like, I'm with a bunch of middle, middle, middle age rubber face women being mean to each other for no reason. What are you doing, Bonnie? No, I was like, Hi, sweetie. I'm getting divorced and I own dildos.

And I love to lick a woman's box. Can I sleep well, baby? The rumor for a long time has been that Andy's baby is really one of the birds on Heather's etched window. Do you guys think so? No. No.

I've just heard it. I don't know that I think it, but I'm just every time we see that little Benjamin now I'm just waiting to see a Like a finger point or a lip purse or when his eyes just turn all blah I love that like if you don't give Benjamin his juice do his eyes turn black and fog just start to rise up above Around him. I love that. He's adorable though. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. Can I touch? Can I touch fetus wall?

So then we move back to the, no one cares Heather, okay? I just feel pizza on my purse, no one cares stupid. So Andy's like, so shenny, what did it mean when Gina's parents came up to you and she and shook her head and said thank you for my Fallu save Gina from going to prison again for So we so we get a montage of like of like Heather and Gina's friendship and had we just see It's just so hilarious just like how Gina just has dollar signs in her eyeballs because Heather's like, I want her to think of me as her very God Heather. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha She was like, oh my god. So then we see them like walking in New York City, the old pizza sauce on the purse thing, you know.

And it culminates with Shannon being like, Gina, put up in it, put up in it. So we get to the reason we all care about this. So Shannon's like, well, it was very sweet when our parents thanked me because we did talk for a very long time. Much longer than Gina actually spoke to me, which was something to say. But you know, Gina brings up that I bring up her DUI all the time, but I promise to bring

it up. Do you remember me promising never to bring it up again, Gina? She said, well, yeah, she did do that, which is kind of like, so wait, your whole beef is shan, and it was that she talks about the DUI a little bit too loosely, and you give her all this shit. And then it turns out that you told shan and she was like, okay yeah, I'll stop doing that and you're still making her like the villain of the sea they're trying to. Well, what else is Gina gonna do?

I mean her whole storyline is trying to get some dude to marry her after she's already moved six children into a shoebox. Getting money from Heather and going to an op-edana. Which nobody even knows what that is. Okay, bless her heart. At least she's making some kind of an effort. I'll give her that because she needs to go. It's time to go.

Bye. Unemployment. Get out. So Emily is like, well you know what she really means. And she's like, can I talk to her? You are always coming in the middle. What the hell is this? Like Shannon just loses her mind, right? Yeah, and so Emla's like, why are you even talking like that?

I just had an opinion. So Shannon, I love to have an opinion. Yes, and you're allowed to have a face that looks like a puckered butthole, but we don't have to like it, okay? Woo! So Shannon's like, well, I don't expect things to be tipped for tat, but you spent the first season gunning for me.

Which, of course, Shannon's going back to Janus for season, which is hilarious. Yeah. And Janus is like, gunning for you, or I don't gun for anyone, Shannon. Shannon's telling everyone she has been got sued for a bad boob job. Shannon's jealous of my skincare line. Shannon's trying to hurt me by trying to be nice to know, well, Shannis jealous of my friendship with Heather.

I'm wearing an off the rat crop dress from Zara because Heather didn't buy me anything. Okay, that one wasn't about Shannin, but still. So Shannin's like, when I have my kids, 100% of the time and I'm getting blasted, your pointy fingers, your blasting at me, I like to call it finger blasting, your finger blasting me. Did I say something? Why are you looking at me like that? And I went through

horrible divorce. This is outrageous because then you went through a divorce two years later. I don't like this. Shannon Mathe,ina went through a divorce storyline after her? I love this show, you know? So, so Gina says something like, oh, I have the good fortune again divorce and I love this because Shannon, I don't think she even knew she was doing this, but Shannon goes, let me finish, this is what you do! I was like, but this is, I guess I was the only one who cared about it, this is what you do moment, right? No. It's OK.

It's OK, guys. I was left with my kids alone, just a wealthy white woman alone with grown children in a mansion. Do you know what it's like to have two fairly independent daughters who are can drive and a husband who pays at Alamoni and another daughter who's actually offered college. You know how hard that is? Oh yeah, look at me. I'm just so lucky.

I got into you. Why? I got into force. Just lucky me. And she said, you stop talking. You know, this is what you do. You cut people off. Like Shannon's head is about to pop off of her. And Shannon goes, I at least wait. I wait for a breath until I lose my shit. Look at you, you amateur. You're an emotional amateur.

Can I get some more water? This water's still not working very well. You know, I'm probably going to lose my voice this reunion. And you know, because I, she literally says, because I like to wait for a logical gap to speak. So Gina goes, you know what, you're gonna lose your voice because you did too many ding dong things this year. Now you're gonna pay the piper and Emily just goes,

oh, ding dong, that's a classic Gina put down. Ding dong! That's a classic Gina put down. So next week, there are Union concludes! Dr. Jan, you're the expert. Who over here had the best work done? It's a trick questions that don't feel bad if you fuck them up. Uh, Heather, what do I say Heather? What do I say Heather? Heather? Listen, I do not need people to walk on eggshells around me. I am a tough person! I tell you, try to mix a little polyester, with a little ray, a little cotton.

I will cry, tearful, not violent, man. You were trying to throw a nickel under the bars. You know, you were really trying to fire him, we all. You have the audacity to save you. Have any friends, Shannon? Five court, four court. Four court. Two court. I'm one and a half. Three point five court bitch!

You know what's mean, spirited? Watching John tell me I can go fuck myself. How aggressive he wants towards me. That's a crazy thing! You could go through a grocery store like that they tell you to fuck off you loser! And that brings us to the end of Real House, as a barge county! You guys! Watch what crap ends would like to think it's premium sponsors!

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