Watch What Crappens - RHOC Part 1: No HDeed Goes Unpunished

Episode Date: September 7, 2023

This week on The Real Housewives of Orange County (S17E13), Heather Dubrow launches her HD Network and sells her house, but no one is happy for her. Plus, Jenn's mom visits!Watch the recap here: https://www.patreon.com/posts/88918551See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Watch what crap is watch what crap is who cares what happens when there's so much that crap is What Kids what happens when they're so wild and rapin' So for you, I'm crap It's for when you don't run around Kids what happens when they're so much that happens Hello and welcome to Watch Your Crapins, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about, I'm Ben Mandelker and having a dance party over in his home is Mr. Ronnie Carrom Hi Ronnie, what's- you're so excited? What's going on?

Sup, brah. Well, sup. Right now I'm doing my new drug of choice. What's that? She went some gum. Nice. Sass, haired everybody. I'm gonna take it out of my mouth right now. But God, I love an addiction and currently it is chewing on gum. So right now that's like me doing a line before the show. I'm ready to rumble, Ben. Yeah, I'm sad. My pre-show addiction is coffee and I'm not on the coffee right now, but I'm really excited to bring coffee back because I miss it. I love it so much. So I'm just going to pretend like I'm just riding off that chewing gum high too, you know? Sounds like a fun time. Do you want to try it? Yeah.

How are you pooping over there? Poo-ping pretty well. I'm in a coffee with that your poop juice. Yeah, it's the poop that's going well. So today we're here to talk about Real Housewives of Orange County. I just wanted to make sure in case anybody was new that they would turn this off immediately. Yeah, it's brilliant. It's brilliant poop.

I think there'll be people who appreciate that, you know? So we're here to talk Real House of Orange County. We do every other Monday, we do crappy hour on our Instagram. Our Instagram is watch what crap ends. Go follow us there. We did one this week. We've been trying out different ways to do the streaming, to try to make it cleaner or so that way we could save the audio to put on our podcast feed. And we got, it's a process as a journey. So for those who were part of the journey this week, thank you very much because it was not always been sailing. Not a smooth journey. Not a smooth journey. Very bumpy journey, much like Carlin Lindsay's relationship, which is what we talked about most of the time. Yes.

But worth it. Very fun. Those will be, those are Mondays at 5.30 pm on the West Coast. So we'll be back in about a week and a half for the next one. And also, we're on video, we're always on video, we're almost always on video. You can go to patreon.com slash watch or crap ends

and sign up at the crap ends on demand level. And you can watch us. You could have seen Ronnie's dance party. So go join us there. You also get access to our bonus episode and things like that. So that is all the fun stuff to talk about. Let's dive into this week's Orange County episode, which begins with Shannon Bedore visiting our old friend Dr. Moon. which begins with Shannon Bedore visiting our old friend, Dr. Moon. Dr. Moon, I just wanna say thank you to this show because all week I've been out of town, I've been parting, I've been seeing my friends,

and I think I've at least said 10 times, at least had me a taco. Oh. It just won't get out of my fucking head. It's a good way to live life, you know, because you feel like there's so many things in life. It leaves Hanmi a taco. If you're going to delay my flight, it leaves Hanmi a taco! Seriously.

So, let's go to Dr. Moon. Shannon is in the office and she's like, wow, Dr. Moon, huh? You look good. Did you just go on vacation, Dr. Moon? And he's like, I'm gonna be Moon, huh, you look good. Did you just go on vacation, Dr. Moon? And he's like, I'm gonna be going on vacation very soon. Because, wow, I'm very stressed, you know, being a shabby.

Some being a party, a party of one over here, fun shannon of one over here, Dr. Moon. He's like, well, you know what, the biggest stress in life is, gravity stress. And she's like, oh, you mean like, my belly, that's sagging down to my knees at the moment. That kind of gravity stress. Wow. It goes, yeah, and your face is sagging too.

Oh, well, too for a portrait from one. Next, Dr. Mune. Don't give people like Dr. Mune the opportunity. Because you're doing that like self-effacing. Is that what it's called? Self-effacing thing? Or you're like, I'm'm gonna say my belly's hanging down And surely he's gonna say no, I didn't mean your belly. I meant your kneecaps

But he's like no you fat ass and so is your so's your face. Hey, I met your face Oh, yeah, well, that's a lot of a lot of honesty happening right now I guess you're not stressed from being too honest, huh? So that's why nobody calls you Dr. Sonny. Dr. Shade of the Moon by Sydney Sheldon. I don't know. I feel like I just saw the dark side of the moon. So she says, stress can wreak havoc on the body and can manifest in certain organs.

And there's been a lot of conversation about my relationship with John. So yeah, there's been a lot of drooping going on around here. So thanks, Heather to bro. You've caused my face to droop. You know, when Newton sat under that tree, Heather DeBrow talked about his relationship and then an apple fell on his head. So thank you for Heather DeBrow's gravity. Thank you, Heather DeBrow, for giving us modern physics, but for everything else, fuck you. for giving us modern physics, but for everything else, fuck you. For, I'd like to thank Heather DeBrow for giving us the only film where somebody looks good wearing a full body diaper as space debris, thrills towards them, and George Clooney dies, Hollis and Robola in gravity.

Thank you, Heather DeBrow. Gravity stress. So, then we see a montage of Dr. Moon basically saying, you talk too much, you eat too much, you talk too much, you eat too much, you talk too much, you eat too much. I mean, why do you have to pay for that? Just go to my mom's house for fuck's sake, that shit's free, save your money for home goods.

Jesus, you want someone to tell you, your fucking belly's hanging too low and you talk too much just call Ronda Well, he gets the emotional stuff that he he deems me he did he actually literally takes out the jail Like a lot of times I try to smuggle jam into his office and he says you can't bring that in here And I just buy a little snack while I wait And then we see a clip of Vicki being taken to doctor man I'm going well You're putting a figure up about there.

Is that your job? Is that what your job is? Putting a figure up my asshole? And Santa going, that's just your tailbone Vicki. Nope, that was my butthole. I'm pretty sure I know what my butthole is. And then Moon's saying, let's make sure that ass is closed. Wow, like that.

That's right. You know what's the fun, funny? I just wrote, Moon doing his thing. I just didn I know that's fun. Funny. I just wrote moon doing his thing. I just didn't write down any notes on that. I just said moon doing his thing, closing up the piece of book. I just love some good doctor moon, the story. She's great.

So moon is like, so what is your anger level shenan? And she's like, wow, I'm a nine. I'm about a nine. Basically, my emotional score is the same score as the physical score of a woman that is a slut that David would sleep with from the beach. Folly was married to me. So I was a nine. My anger is a nine, but it was five when I walked into this office,

and then you took away my smuggers. So I'm at a nine. It took me much at. Now that the butt smuggers is out of my purse. Uh, smug, right? I was going to have a scone afterward, set Starbucks and brought my own BYOJ, but I guess not. Well, I wanted to show you, oh, so you know about that. Well, first of all, he's massaging her and Shannon's making so many Shannon sounds while

she's getting massaged. She's like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, Yeah! Well, Dr. Moon, I want to show you some stuff about the at-home Klonik. So I took your prototype that you gave me and I have a console designing and improved prototype at the home of the home Klonik and it's where you fill a toilet seat and there's like a little, it's just a little bit more modern and I'm just, I guess I'm saying this because I'm looking forward to next year

when we wind up suing each other because that's the inevitable path this is gonna go. By the way, this colonic is called Sitalonic. Okay. Oh shit, I thought it was called Sitalonic. Oh my God. Sitalonic. Well, it probably is.

Yours makes more sense. Because I was like, Sitalonic, can you call it that? Sitalonic, which is close enough. And he's like, okay, what about Sitalonic, Ben? And she's like, wow, you know, I am doing a business. Ding! Did you hear the ding? That means it's a good idea.

With Dr. Moon, I've been using the Sitalonic, okay, we're at Sitalonic this time. So, you know, baby Ben has a point. And it's important to not always be correct. And if you feel like you're always correct, settle on David's index finger and tell the emotional debris is cleared from your jam, your jam smuggler, which is what David and I used to call my bad all. Am I always correct? No. Did I think Michael Jackson's song jam was going to be a hit that we'd be singing for years and years yes was I wrong yes am I okay with

that yes I guess I am not really I'm actually I really love that song so she's like well I have been using this little onic for years but there's an issue with the tip just like David funky tips just the tip they said you know it's funny because David always would say just the tip and I was like well why do you want it if you want to do the colonic, do the colonic, is it? You don't understand, dear. And to the say, I still don't understand. I do know this, David left his tip all over town. Ooh.

Ooh. Can I say that? No. You got a flashback of 2016, which I thought this was like 2013. I can't believe it was 2016. And she's like, well, I thought I had something at my ass for the last hour and children, your daddy showed me true love tonight by looking at my fanny.

And then he goes, and David, I think I still have a little on my fingers dear. Ew, also, I remember this. And this is one of my, this is my, this is why I'll always love Shannon no matter what because Shannon's story was she thought she had something from the colonics stuck up her butt.

So David put his fingers up her butt, all of Whitney and Bobby and it turned out that she did not have anything up her butt. It was emotional debris. And yet she's still making a product so nothing gets stuck up her butt, it was emotional to breathe. Yes. And yet she's still making a product, so nothing gets stuck up her butt, even though nothing got stuck up her butt in the first place. It, none of it makes sense.

It's just a Shannon storm business. Yeah, so great. I, yeah, it feels like a little lifetime ago, but 2016 doesn't feel like it was that far away. But yeah. Should be called a deer a lonic, and it should be shaped like David's index finger. Yeah, you just go in there and poke around until something gets loose.

Dears. Just bad moods come out. Yeah. Third and 40 negative thoughts about your butthole. Well, I'm picking the next step to grow my business because not only am I paying for one kid to go to college next year, I have three kids. Those are three tiny sombreros to send to college.

And not only are my kids applying to schools for that are expensive, they are in city-sitter expensive-cliving. There's New York City. No. There's Portland, Oregon. What's the other one? No, she has, so Sophie's going to Baylor in Waco, and then Stella's going to USC.

Waco's not an expensive city. I mean, I felt like. She's in Joanna City. There was no. Your daughter is going to like ship lap city. Okay, it's like a little later cult. Place there. And then Adalines going to Parsons,

which surprised me, because I feel like Parsons is, you know. That's not expensive. Well, but New York City. But either way, it still surprised me because I just, I feel like what's unspoken is that like Shannon's household feels like it's very conservative Republican, right?

And it's just funny to me that Adeline's going to Parsons and I feel like she's gonna come back and she's gonna come back with all these liberal New York City views and she's like, wow, wow, wow. I sent you off to college and this is the things I get. Are these new views on pronouns and how you see things? Well, Adeline is identifying as a unicorn without emotional debris at Perbunco. Oh, thanks a lot, Libs.

Okay, well, thanks so much. I have, I sent off Adeline and what came back was a small little Elizabeth Warren in my household. See you next time. Who knew it's actually pronounced come on. Thanks for the lesson. I guess I guess on my years of living on this earth compare nothing to my daughter who spent three weeks in New York City and now understands everything works thanks a lot let me tell you something to your liberal values tell you how to move a chandelier up and down because it's broken. You want to fix the world start with a chandelier.

So my best friend went to Parsons. So I know that. That's why I'm like, that's not a spots of. Because my best friend went there, which is so rude to my best friend, by the way. Hi, Lane. She went to Parsons? I think so. It's really far out, right?

Like, where is it? No, I think it's in the, I think it's in Manhattan, or Brooklyn. No, it's very far up somewhere I remember having to travel for a very far time and then we hung out There's a dorm room design and we smoke oh Parsons is from project runway. Yeah, I don't have to have you unless you're SUNY That's you need purchase I think so that's what I did a playwriting class this SUNY purchase

That's unipurchase. I think so. I did a playwright in class. It's unipurchase. You know what? Sorry. Are you thinking, wait a second. Oh my god. Do you know all the fashion people that are in such a snag now?

I hope they didn't all press stop. I'm sorry. Wait, are you sure you're not thinking of the Paris campus of Parsons? Which we all know Victoria from Real-Go-Friends and Paris went to with Giorgiorger Mom there. Mom! This is like totally my work, mom. Okay, so I'm sorry I was dissing the wrong school. Yeah, persons I hear from Project Runway.

That should be fun. Yeah, I'm already looking forward to Adeline being told she's out. She's gone out. I just got here. Please pack your line and go add up. So Kristen, Kristen, Jen's mom, okay, so we get a scene with Jen's mom. Oh my gosh. So of course, she's like, you're not going to make me look stupid on this show.

You're not going to make me look like a bitch, Jen, like you have everybody else in your life. I'm making cookies. We're doing the scene of good old me mom making cookies. Do it, Jen. My making cookies. We're doing the scene of good all me mom making cookies. Do it Jan. My famous cookies now wasn't saying the back of that box. Okay. Memeys homemade chocolate chip cookies. And Jen's like, I'm like, I've never made homemade cookies before. Thank you so much for teaching me this.

This is a real heritage moment. Mom, thank you so much. You know what this bowl represents our family. You put a bunch of different ingredients in there And you mix them all around and you know what? It's delicious for your soul no matter how many calories. It doesn't matter how many calories because you're feeding the soul my right We're gonna come on like these out later to support Shannon. I appreciate Shannon her soul so open Mom, let's get a bowl my mom the fuck is happening you Jan You don't have two ends in your name to act stupid. Where's your other face?

Now, you know that that's the mom's real personality and see, you can tell this mom yells at you. She has yell at you, coffee breath, I feel like. And it would mom yell at you so hard you can smell their coffee breath. I think this mom has it and she has just started speaking to Jen again and Jen's already making her films. So she's trying to act nice,

but she also wants to murder Jen and her. This is a woman who definitely cuts you off at the supermarket in the line and then brings like 18 items to the 59 item, you know, express line. So Jen's like, yeah, my mom is truly my best friend, even though she's never given me her quote unquote famous cookie recipe, which by the way,

is quote unquote not really famous. But she lives in Oklahoma with my family. Yeah. You know, my mom, it's so funny because she last time I talked to her on the phone, she called me a selfish horn hung up on me. But so funny that she calls me selfish, but she forces the rest of us to call her me, me. So who selfish now?

Yeah, me, me. So, you know, where I'm from, divorce is taboo. And apparently, gauging by my mother, so you know where I'm from divorce is taboo and apparently Gaging by my mother so was calorie counting So anyway, she's really my best friend. She's had a lot of those cookies, hasn't she? And the mom's like wow Cup, a couch a cup of coffee and I got my daughter with me. I just can't believe it. God They've made Sodom and Gomorrah so comfortable and I got my daughter with me. I just can't believe it.

God, they've made Sodom and Gomorrah so comfortable. And they really done a nice job in this office. That's nice. Satan gonna be seeing us soon or you're just gonna be going there so low when you die. Ha, ha, ha, ha. So, Jen's like, you know what's hard for me, mom?

Aside from coming up with a comeback to that. Everyone thinks, it's hard to out-set. You're not a comeback to that, everyone thinks. It's hard to out sit. You're not a comeback or you're just a lever. We all know you, Jim. Okay. You know you don't come back, honey. I've been working in the family office for 20 years.

One thing I never expected for you was to come back. Just go. Well, if anyone knows anything about coming, it's you, mother. So everyone, thank you so much. I'm not saying you sleep around, mother, but I'm saying you meet this cookies for a lot of people. That's why they're famous. I'm not saying you're not wrong, okay?

There's a lot of you. There's a big family. I'm proud of it, okay? So you'd see it's turning into trees, okay? Call me tree tree. Okay, me too much. You can just call me tree tree. But you know, it's really hard for me, mom.

Everyone thinks that you leave your marriage and that person is dead to you. You know, and like, that's absolutely not. I love Will, yes, but you are dead to us. So in some ways, you're right. Honey, the only reason you love Will is because he's got one. Okay, and we all know it. And you know what? I will never forget what Will said to me.

I'll never forget it. Hold on to saying, can you, hold on, I don't want to cry in a horror house. Okay, do not cry. Okay, I'll never forget it. Hold on to saying, can you, hold on, I don't want to cry to a whorehouse. Okay, do not cry, okay, hold on to saying. The only reason he married, he said the only reason he married you is because of me, because he doesn't have a mother.

I was like, and you don't want her to divorce and ask, who says something like that? Like, sorry about your dead mom, but who's like the only reason I married your kid was because of you? What the fuck kind of thing is that to say? I thought to myself finally I'm gonna have a gay son someone who cares about the mother more than the wife and Then just threw them out like cardboard She's like it's been so hard Jan also Jan you're not the victim You don't get to be like wow I cheated on my husband and left him

So Jen, you're not the victim. You don't get to be like, wow, I cheated on my husband and left him and took all of the children away to a different city to date a guy with Mr. Furley Face who wears jackets with spray painted wears on them. But my feelings are hurt. Like I like Jen, but you're not the victim. You don't get to be the victim here.

Well, I think she's the victim of her family. Her family's supposed to have her back. So Jen says. I think you're right about that actually. And they probably forced her to marry well. Yeah, actually, now that I'm thinking about it, I'm like, she probably never even wanted to marry well. And then she came to them and was like,

you know what, I'm emotionally, I need something that I'm not getting at. And her mom was like, oh, you just shut up. All right, this is in the back. You, you, this is about me, me, and Will chose me, me, not Jen enough. So you just shut up and Will chose me, me, not Jenna. So you just shut up and you have as many kids as you want. Will probably showed up at the door of this household wearing like a red and white

striped blazer and one of those white hats with the stiff brims. I was like, hello, ma'am, you know, I don't care about your daughter, I care about you. I want to marry you through your daughter and we can start an enterprise together. This guy's probably shyster. He probably is old to take over the family, you know, Wicked's company. What do you think they sell? What do they call those things? Widgets.

Widgets, they got Widgets. They got Widgets actually things now. I feel like they sell hinges or something like that. Like rot iron hinges that look like old barn hinges, you know? They're almost like old times. They're like, God, don't like old barn hinges, you know, like homeless, they're like, oh, they're like, God, don't you miss when hinges relax this? They are again. Like those rot will. Like those rot iron hinges that look like they've got like a spade at the end of them like from

the cards, you know, like one of those hinges. Do you made hinges that you could trust? You could trust our family. These are family hinges. May me tangies. Do you want a hinge that reminds you of living in the old West? that you could trust, you could trust our family, these are family hinges. Mimi's hinges. Do you want a hinge that reminds you of living in the Old West? Back when there was no electricity, but you had a good door swing. That's why you use Mimi's famous hinges.

Also try out cookies. Don't you miss when hinges made sounds? We don't use any WD-40 in our hinges. When someone comes in and out of your house, you're gonna hear it. Me means hinges. Whaaat? Oh.

And for a limited time only, get one of our bonus slide and lock things where you have to jimmy it. A bunch of times just to think, get the thing to slide up. Just remember, you rotate the thing up out of the groove, slide it over back down on the groove. That's your problem right there. Get it right now. Those are the instructions.

Hi. We're modern ass. You just have to scan in the code and then a video will come up of instructions with me going. Just Jimmy the thing to run and throw it over the thing. What the hell is wrong with you, Jen? And uh. Hello. You've reached Kristen's famous hand. Just Jimmy the thing that ran through it over the thing what the hell is wrong with you gin and a Hello, you've reached Kristen's famous hand just as Chris and speaking how I'm gonna help you Oh, you got a problem with your with your lot slide locking thing. Yeah, okay, you got a Jimmy it go up Okay to the up and down you push it to the right

Okay, you didn't go up further far enough. Okay, you're up higher now to the right there you go now down You got to do it down your you go. Now down, you gotta do it down. You're locked. Congratulations. Thanks so much, bye. Uh. Come the shoes. Here comes one right now. I want you to picture Steve Jobs, tinkering with a computer in his garage. Walt Disney drawing cartoons for his high school newspaper.

Every big moment starts with a big dream, but what happens when that dream turns out to be an even bigger failure? Each week on Wonder Woman's new podcast The Big Flop, host Misha Brown is joined by different comedians to chronicle some of the biggest failures and blunders in pop culture history. Each episode will have you thinking, why in the world did this get made? From box office flops like Cats the Movie, to Action Park, New Jersey's infamous theme park that had countless injuries, many lawsuits, and rides so wild it became known as Class Action Park. Or Quibi, that short form video platform with an even shorter lifespan. It's a story of a spectacular failure with lots of surprises along the way. Enjoy the big flop on the Wonder App or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to the big flop early and add free on Wondering Plus. Get started with your free

trial at Wondering.com slash plus. Hey listeners, you need to know that Wondering Shocking True Crime podcast over my dead body is back for a fourth season gone hunting. This newest season covers the story of Mike Williams. It was Mike's sixth wedding anniversary when he set off on a hunting trip into the gator-infested swamps of North Florida. He figured he'd be back in time to take his wife Denise out to celebrate, but he never came back. Friends and loved ones feared he met his fate through bad luck and a group of hungry alligators,

leaving his young family behind. Except that's not what happened at all. And after 17 years, a kidnapping, and the uncovering of a secret love triangle, the truth would finally be revealed. Enjoy over my dead body, gone hunting on the Wondering App, or wherever you get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of over my dead body early and add free on Wondering Plus. Get started with your free trial on Wondry Plus.

Get started with your free trial at Wondry.com slash plus. So the mom's like, it has been so hard running me me's hinges alone. And it's like, well mom, I just, you know what, I didn't mean for this to happen with well, but I'm at Ryan. And suddenly someone had an interest in me. And, you know, being being being hard on well, it hurts. It hurts me, mom.

Jennifer, you gotta be happy. You can't just pretend to be happy. Okay, you gotta really be happy. And look at you, you basically are. I mean, you might as well have a meter on your couch that we can all watch the time flick behind, see how much money is coming into your till. I've never seen a happier hooker. I always, you've got to be happy in this laugh.

That's why I stay as far away from you as possible. You slutty heathen. Don't need your... You know, see it, or you could just tell. And so, by the way, Jen is talking to this woman who's barely holding it together and she's got one of those cups that has like the Skrigly riding on it,

like the cartoon line drawing. And it says Mama's Day, but that's just so funny. I have yoga. I teach yoga outside, so I have a coffee cup that says Mama's Day. So Jenna is like, I just want someone who knows me to me

and because I need an honest opinion. And I know you, Jen, this is the second person you've done this with. He's not a good person and he's not right for you. He's a total douchebag. Everyone can see it. Even you can see it. Nobody needs a third opinion.

You already had that girl in the Ashley. What's the Ashley print? The Ashley print Ashley. Uh, what's that? What's that brand? Oh, yeah, yeah. Ashley. Or he had that girl in that sad Laura Ashley, you know, office party outfit here last week

to confirm that he was a nice person. Now you phone your mom out from Oklahoma. By the way, mom is not a good judge for these things. Mom, mom clearly already likes Will. Will loves mom, mom loves Will. So mom is not gonna be biased on this one. On bias. Mom wanted you to stay with a man who wasn't fulfilling your needs

or had no intention of fulfilling your needs ever and told you to suck it up and just keep working. You know. She says, well, my family started saying that saying that they started to see the gen, the old gen from before my marriage. And then wanted to know, who is this man that brought her back? And can we send him away?

Because old gen was so fucking annoying, that's why we sent her to Los Angeles and um the mom's like listen I just I want you to know that I do love you and I'm so sorry I haven't been there for you I'm sorry because it's not as easy for a normal human to be there as for Satan who's promising you the world and hugging you all not long? Just a male. So now we go to Heather DeBro in Glam and she's getting dressed up and she's like, I love this dress. How is this bow looking?

Please don't take it off. I do not like bows removed without approval. Boads cannot be removed from cakes or from my outfits without approval. Do you understand homosexual person? And the guy's like, you look so hot. Could you be a little less believable? This guy is like apparently got stuck at one of the gates today. You could tell he's in a smith.

He's not even trying to sound real. He's like, you look hot. So Terry comes in and he's like, well, so wait a minute. Can I wear a red pocket score with a red tire? Do I have to wear a different color? And she's like, oh, Terry, Terry, have red pocket score with a pink tie? That's not a thing.

And then the makeup guy goes, you're so straight. I love it. Thank you, Alfredo. You've done your work for today. You can see yourself at the Servin Sexit. Thank you. Stringing out done your work for today. You can see yourself at the servants exit. Thank you Stringing out Alfredo. Could you please use your two index fingers and just like close my eyelids forming once I haven't been able to like this morning I'm sorry Terry, but I'm a little bit too busy right now. You'll just have to get the drops like usual

so then Emily and Gina are face timing and Emily is like are you coming up or a ghost? I have a bottle of food, but I was like, I mean, I'll give you a bottle of food, but you can at least hand me a taco. And then Tamra and Jen, who instantly dress like tennis balls, so they're in bright neon green. And everyone's showing up because it's Heather's Fireside event. So by the way, by the way, first of all, standing ovation for real housewives of Orange County, they said, you know what, let's just throw an event in eight minutes in, let's have an event. And that's the way these shows should be doing it like events. Why don't make us wait through, you know, if you don't have good content,

don't make us wait through, you know, 45 minutes of bullshit to get to an event, like just, you know, take two episodes, squish them into one event, we'll have another thing later in the episode, Bravo, Bravo Orange County, you got it right. So it's the fireside event. I also just like making up events, like they're really big things,

like Heather getting an event. It's like us holding a YouTube celebration party. Like you guys, we were accepted onto YouTube. Ken, everybody please bring it up. We're gonna be like putting WC YT everywhere you like. There's just that brand. There are people though who do get that. People get like press coverage for changing their podcast art.

Like this just in This podcast changed their podcasts are so it's like it's really not that far of a stretch to a party for like like having a video on YouTube So Heather any shit guys? We've got a new account at survey monkey. We're having a party And you know by the way I've been in for all of those. So Heather is saying. We're like, I don't know why I'm acting like I'm so about this.

We don't know what it's like. Oh, no, like this is like, I'm like, guys, should we, should we have a party for using HootSuite? Thanks. So. But I feel like we know that we're dobers. That's what makes it fun. We're like, guys, we learned a new template on camp.

So, party. We learned how to do outlines of cutouts on camp. So we're going to have a party at the montage. We did. By the way, fucking life changing ban. Thank you so much. And I love camp. A hashtag not an ad, but I was like,

camp, I already pay for a photoshop. I'm wowed we use camp. Because you can do automatic background removal literally works every single time And I mean look at our beautiful YouTube art. Yeah, that's by Ben. That's by Ben What do you say about by me? You're the one who created the YouTube art template. You made it pop with Cut out of the Penal Arts and outlines Listen, I just looked on I just looked on best practices on the internet, you know?

So anyway, Heather is there at her event. Her party planner is there and this party planner correct me up her name is like, hey, hella, it's H-A-L-E-H, hella, and her company. They just spelled it as camera would pronounce. Hella. Hella. Hella. Hella. Hala. Hala. Hala. Hala. Hala. Hala.

Hala. So Hala. Hala. I don't know if it's pronounced like Haley or is it Hala. I don't know if it's like I mean. I don't mean from a different perspective. I mean like language group or something. Yeah.

So I'm like not, I'm not like being fun on the name, but I did think of his funny that her company's name was called. I love that her Kairan was Hlla, founder of Details, my hella. And she's wearing this dress that has a grid, it's like a black dress, like a breakfast in his dress, but it has like a white perforated grid on it. I'm almost like, if you want to do like cut this into smaller shapes, here are some guidelines for you. And she makes everyone who works for her wear the same dress.

It was like a weird steppered wives of a plant. What was that? It was the Audrey Hepburn dress wasn't it? No it had like a white. It was like Audrey Hepburn or Jackie O you know like the white black and white weed type thing. Oh it was cracking me up. Yeah.

It was weird and they also dress like Heather McDonald's. I'm not Heather McDonald, I'm sorry Heather, do you bra, why did I say Heather McDonald is all over this podcast gossip news. It's a limited edition. You know when they were, it's everywhere because I read all of these threads. You know, I'm eating all of the podcast gossip. You guys got, you guys stop fighting with each other. You guys are whole fight and stop fighting.

You guys are all fucking ridiculous. That's my statement, okay? Because people come on the Instagram live and they're like, aren't you guys friends, but Heather or Julie and Randy or Jeff or whatever, varying degrees of friends with all of them, yes. All of you are ridiculous. All of you say you're sorry.

We're supposed to be making fun of people together We're not supposed to be making fun of each other. Okay, stop You guys are all at each other and start aiming them outward. It's stop fighting you guys are idiots You guys are also funny to be fighting with each other Stop there. You're too funny. This is ridiculous and I am reading every read it thread about it I am listening to someone sent me Jeff's podcast going off on Heather, so I listen to that. And then I, someone sent me another thing of Heather today, standing outside Craig's,

doing the paparazzi thing where people are like, Heather, we heard about you and Jeff Lewis and Heather's like, who? I don't even know anybody by that name. I'm trying to do the Mariah Carey thing at Jeff Lewis. And then, you know, Leah Blacks all upset and then Julie and Brandy, that thing happened with them. You guys, stop it. We're all terrible. We need to all be terrible people together. If terrible people can't stick together, what hope does this world have?

Also, is it sad that no one wants the food with us? No one wants the food with us. We don't have time for that shit. We don't even feud with each other. We're literally exhausted. I know. I know. I feud with each other. We're literally exhausted. Life is too short, eat something, and laugh with people. I want like a random feud. I want like, I want like, Joel Osteen to be like, and another thing, those crap and boys. I'm like, yeah, I'm ready for it, Joel Osteen,

and your podcast. Yeah, that's a good feud, but not each other, you guys. Not each other, you guys. Not each other. Although I am loving the content. It's very funny. It is very funny. You will never believe that Heather said to me

and then Heather said to Justin Martin down on her show. Yeah, they're fighting too. They're all going off on each other. And then Jeff's show has all these people that are agreeing with him. Like, you're right, Jeff, girl. You are always right.

And then I'm sure Heather has her people. And then Heather goes on her Patreon. She's like, you must pay $20 to listen to my terribleing and woe. And then people go pay, God knows, that one is probably about a goddamn house by now from all of those Patreons. You know, to all of you, I hope this is fake.

And I hope you're all making millions of dollars off of this. But it's hurting my feelings to read about it because God damn it, you're funny people. Aim the shit outward. Not don't let the call come in the family. Don't let the call come in the family. Don't let the call come in the family. Yeah, but you know what,

it's probably doing great, great for all of their podcasts. So they probably know something that we don't. So Heather DeBro is telling us by the way um fuck Dan yelling Casey both from bitch we started it we started it just kidding that's just yeah no they're like literally like so lovely so um Heather who would we go after next hmm I was I was I was aiming big for Joel Literally like so lovely. So Heather Who do we go after next? Hmm. I was I was I was aiming big for Joel Austin

You know we can make that happen Joe. I like that you gave him an an accent at the end of his name Joel Osteen. It's just Joel Osteen. Okay. I think I mean, I don't know. Maybe you're pronouncing it Okay, well, let's go have fans here. I don't want him to get the accent. I the fuck that guy. Let's go and live in Motherfucker. Wait, let's go after someone who we know just represents cruelty and evil incarnate. Danny Pellegrino, what a mean person. What an awful human person.

What an awful fucking person that guy has. God. You know what I really hate about him? The way that he literally just tries to bring a bag of joy and just drop it in people's minds. I mean, what a dick. What the way he's like so supportive of us and like whenever we need him to help us with something,

he just helps. What the fuck? Yeah, life's too short. So, we're bad at this. Anyway, guess what? Does people are all making a lot of money with their fighting? Their dupe route is with... Fireside.

ED Fireside, I can tell you that. I can almost guarantee it. I am launching the first lifestyle network on the Fireside platform. It's not the own network, although I could own the own network, sorry, OPs, but it's the HD network. To celebrate, I am throwing a party that feels very Heather Jupro lifestyle, living your life in high definition. And by high definition, I mean, you get to be part of something that is so much wealthier than you could ever imagine.

And then you go home to your small hovels and say, wow, was that a fever dream? Did someone actually own? Could someone actually pay for that? How amazing! The possibilities of show is on my network. So ridiculous. You know, the thing is about acting, posting, creating content. Mmm, mmm, did everybody follow that? Very different careers doing all of those things currently. It can be as complicated as 27 auditions to get the role. Or you could just see me on the HD network. The more work you do, the more you're seen.

And it's about being seen. Which is why we're currently in a building with windows. This is work people, I am working right now at the moment, fuck Heather McDonald! All right, it's all about high definition and being seen, which is why my security cameras on my staff are both high definition and rolling at all times. She's ridiculous. Okay. So she's made mirrored menus and they're by the way gigantic. They're those like really thick things.

They put pictures inside of. Wasn't that HG network already a thing? Wasn't that like a, it wasn't literally a television. Okay. But wasn't that, but wasn't that like the scariest thing to, okay? But wasn't that like the most the most various thing to ever happen to housewives watchers? I felt like there was literally a network. I feel like I remembered there was like a network

called HDNet or something like that. I don't know, I'm like mad. I'm mad on behalf of this like basic cable network that was out in like 2004 to 2006. Oh, let's see. There is Explorer content HD Productions Network, HD Productions Network, Deference, hold on, I'm opening it.

HD Production. Watch anytime Anywhere HD Productions Network. Oh my god, go to the HD Network on Fireside. It's just like Heather DeBros face so big. It's daring at you. She's basically doing the smile poster. Hi, you've now seen my smile. You now will become a subscriber.

Did you go to it? She's literally doing the smile poster. She is the chick from Smile. It's like the very first thing you see, it's so big, and it's like, I don't know how that movie goes, but I think it's if you see a smile then you have seven days before you die or something. Like the one you see this, this smile, this crazy smile, it's just like the spirit that follows

you. Those glasses aren't good enough. You are using improper glasses, whether it is acting, whether it is posting, whether it is Instagramming, it is work. It's like Heather to throw a stringling you with her button eyes. I've never heard a better description than the smile lady.

Okay, let's look at her, says. But I just want to say that the artwork on the website says, the HG Network launching Tuesday, May 9th, on FireSide. So that needs to be updated. She's also doing this thing where she's crouching for the photo. You know how one a short person takes your photograph and you kind of crouch to see you don't look like Hagrid.

You're like, put your head down to it because you know they're going to get 20 chins. See, put your head. She's doing it like that with her creepy smile. Okay, so that's the first one. It says the HD network, fire, whatever gay took this, first of all. Okay, so I'm clicking on a show called Nightcap with Heather Dubrow and it's her clip art of champagne, which this is free. Isn't this woman a zillionaire?

This is all free clip art. Okay, what's in this shirt? Listen, I, it's her with Mark Cuban at that restaurant and his assistant. This is, this is sad. This is making me sad. This is sad. This is making me sad. This is actually making... I almost feel bad. I actually almost feel bad making fun of these things because I feel like... You know why? Because I feel like she was sold a lie. I feel like she was... Wow, I feel like she was conned into this

platform. And I feel bad she was conned into this platform That makes me feel bad for her genuinely feel bad for her This is her so it has a video playing when you go to her website It's just her just being Heather, you know, it's like you guys want to see what my lifestyle is like I Assumed that it was gonna just all be black like a coffin lid would shut and you just hear echoes of her like bossing around Alfredo from sort some sort of little radio device. But it's actually not. It's her walking through her zillion dollar apartment. It says

welcome, the elevated her private elevator opens. And then she walks down the hallway and throws her keys down. And then leather jacket over the couch and poise herself some shamps. Oh I'm barefoot now that's right. I'm going out to this fabulous wrap around balcony where you can see the ocean. Hi, Reba. She turns around and smiles terrifyingly at the camera and now I'm being suffocated. Coming to you live from Century City, Los Angeles. It's the head of the depression. from century city Los Angeles. It's the head of depression. Nobody can see.

But me, what does anybody believe me? She's here, isn't the room with me. I just have to assume that was a very accurate portrayal of the movie, because I'm too scared to watch it. Commissars, here comes one right now. But I think also what's hard is like this, this video that Ronnie just described, actually very flawlessly, is actually a very well shot video. It looks good.

And then when you click on Heather's on her nightcap show, it looks just like Instagram live. I mean, it's literally her, she literally has her claw hands out like this. Her hands are up. She's like, Hi, hi everyone. And she's just talking to the kids. It's literally Instagram live. I, you know, here's what I don't want to hear from somebody doing a $5,000 at minimum video opening to their $50,000 apartment. My HD network helps all of us live our lives in high definition, a clear, focused, intentional life. So grab a glass of shemps and let's learn,

grow and evolve together, period, dot, dot, dot. Okay, don't tell me you're gonna help me evolve when you have a period and then a dot, dot, dot. You can't period and then ellipses, Heather. $20 a month, build monthly, twenty dollars a month build monthly seventeen dollars a month build annually are there boobs on this hold on night cat and your day with me as we share stories pop some champs and spills some tea nothing is off limits milk mom's I'd like to friend let's talk about life through the common lens of parents I like to friend who

did that who is that on her network mom's I like to like to friend. Let's talk about life through the common lens of parents. Mom's I'd like to friend. Who did that? Who? Is that on her network? Mom's I'd like to friend. Okay, we'll see. This is the show on her network. I'd like to friend. I'd like to give a shout out, by the way,

as long as we're talking about things. Let me give a shout out to whoever made this, I'm sorry I forgot your name, but she's from Bellingham, Washington, who made me this wonderful mug that I'm drinking tea out of, it's being obscured by the green screen, but it's of the Real Housewares of Kitchen Island, so thank you very much for making I have two of them and I love them both dearly But it was very sweet glad you could get that in there while we're trying to promote Heather's HD business

Also, Ben, Ben have to show what the fuck Ben, okay? Listen, Mil milk, mom's I'd like to friend, let's talk about life through the common lens of parenthood. It takes a village, let's help each other. Listen, it takes a village to raise a baby, but it also takes a village to burn a witch. Get this shit off this website. Curbside consult with my husband, celebrity plastic surgeon Terry Debrouw. Have you ever wanted to ask Terry questions about surgery or the lady? Oh great. Have you ever wanted to ask Terry questions about surgery or the lady?

Oh great. So I can sign on and Terry can get, put me on the fucking Zoom whiteboard and start sharpening my face and telling me everything ugly about me. There's also a lot of purple. There's a lot of purple on here. Are you looking at the join?

Look at these shows. Are you looking at them? I looked at the join. I saw Shakira performing. Where's that? I'm in. Oh, sorry. on here are you looking at the joint look at these shows you looking at them i looked at the joint i saw secure performing where that i'm in oh sorry i have to hit that you have to hit the home button at the top and start to see all the it starts off with like johnny carson and then you scroll down johnny carson they think you can't you can't charge money to meet johnny carson he's dead i mean i'm in his terry do bro there's like

secure and concert in two thousand ten i don't know why this is playing, but it is. Johnny Carson's on the H. Sheet. I don't get it. And Tyler Henry. True crime now. There's just a man talking. There's a lady talking to Tyler Henry now. As he's rolled out and so is our forget about it. Oh Shakira. Gaston bear. Okay, yes, this is that psychic gay, the McColley-Colk and Gay psychic. I mean, there's definitely stuff happening on here. It's just all strange.

Jeff Dunham's doing ventral-equism. What is happening on this site? Oh, fuck it. Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I found it, I found it. Craftsy TV, there's like these two ladies. Wait, oh my god, this is it craft see TV. Okay fireside This is the content you need to be giving okay is whoever made the dress for

Jen's friend he now has a show here on fireside I see are you on it? CFC TV. Oh, I love it band Band this is our future. Oh my god. I'm putting in their channel. Put this up on the screen so people can see. Oh my god. I love her. Okay, we hold on. I'm presenting. I'm presenting. Okay, so here we've got. Here we've got. Listen, you can make any kind of dress. Just pick a fun pattern. That's what we love.

Oh, no, one to tie her in. We hold on. Okay. Off our, oh, it says off our needles. I really, really hold on. Okay, off our needles. Oh, there's a show. I need to show my own wrist brace. You know why? Because so-and-make sure wrist hurts sometimes. Oh, here's Pam. She's sending her right through the needle.

Oh, I hope she did a back stitch on that. Otherwise, the thread's gonna come right on out. Oh, Jody, watch out for your fingers with your shears. That's very dangerous, okay? Oh, look at that, Vests. I'm gonna give that to Pam someday. Oh gosh, okay, just stop concentrating on my hair. Now look I found a way to get a fabric the same as my couch and also my blouse and I'm gonna make work out clothes that you don't have to work out in

Look at these. Look at this is the star. This is the star of Satan. I decided I wanted nothing but him's okay now Okay, I'm gonna be crazy. I'm gonna put a ruler diagonally on a pattern. Oh, look, there's Tyler Henry. Oh, Tyler Henry, I got it. Tyler. That's what happens. Okay, Tyler, I got killed by the sewing machine and I'm trying to finish my show on the audience.

Can you please talk to the audience about making Star of Satan patterns? I went back to offer needles because I don't know how to actually look at what's on their channel. I'm trying to get to their channel so we can see more on, I'm trying to see like on things. I think we can click Crafsy TV up here at the top. No, no, no,

no, no, no, I'm looking at Crafsy TV down here. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, here we go. You see where it says plus at the Crafsy TV. Look, look, I'm not, now I'm on the Crafsy TV channel. Let's see what the, hey, where you're, hey, where are your shows? Where are your shows C Craphsy TV? With a step-by-step video instruction along with downloadable patterns and recipes. Oh my god recipes too guys You know what why stop at knitting sweaters? Let's knit some noodles. How do I see Craphsy TV on here? I it's where I it's they just they're they're tempting new Craphsy TV But they won't let me actually see any content from Csytv. I'm really upset. This is terrible. Craftsytv is like, hey, you know what?

I'm really having fun doing these shows with you, Deb, but we're not getting anybody to sign up because nobody can sign up for this. You can't get a, I can't click on anything to get to Craftsytv. I would be putting my credit card information, but they have a scan thing. Should I scan the thing? No, because I'm watching the first two days. Look at this. Look at these fingernails doing the, so it have a scan thing. Should I scan the thing? No, because I'm watching the first, look at this finger nails doing the, so it hasn't launched. This is just like a sizzle reel for Crafsey TV. Look at her, no, she's a tannic. Look at her black, look at that older woman, a black fingernail. You know, I once

went to Cleveland, so I've spent some time in the big city before. First, first, you put your needle, you put your knitting in the shape of a nose. Okay. And then we're going to put the neighbor's baby that were baby sitting right in them. Oh, and it keeps on going back to Tyler Henry. Like, we don't want to sing. This is called hang the baby. Join Crafsey.

Come in soon. Come in soon. We're going to show you how to knit for all the people that you hate. Okay. Because when you go to Cleveland you learn some things, okay? And your life's never the same after that. Can I just say though real quick? This looks amazing what she's knitting.

What is that? Why can't we have C-TV? I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I have Crafts C-TV. I feel like Heather DeBro is fully upstaged by these anonymous hands doing stuff with knitting. And now clip her. Oh my god, yes these two, I want them.

Hey, we're the scarf sisters. We wear scarf so you don't have to. You know some of us like pattern scarves, some of us just like regular knitted scarves. You know what that doesn't make one person better than the other. It just makes me better than my sister. You know some of us are confident enough to grow our hair while our sisters walk around trying to relive Linda Dano's best moments. Yeah, you know, you're kind of a bitch for saying that, you know, when I went to Cleveland, I learned there's a lot of interesting people out there and you're not one of them. Wow, you know what? You know where I wish you'd

go right now? Leave land. How about that? How about take off the sea? Because, you know what, take off the seaword for seaword sister. Except what you are. Leave land. I just want to say that my choice for a backdrop was actually going to be a picture of my dog and she insisted on all this yarn behind us and I am still resentful of it. I would like to give you a compliment though. I knitted this myself and I would love to hang you in it. So, wow, you could. That was our needles. I knitted this myself and I would love to hang you in it.

Wow, you could. That was a great time with off our needles. But we should probably get back to real house as a Farage County while this lady makes a, oh my gosh, you made a handkerchief. She made a handkerchief. Oh God, now she's pointing at network. And someone's wearing minz.

This lady's got sleeves. Oh, this lady. Okay, let's get back to this. Okay, let's, let's, oh, look at that. She's making, she's, in the middle of it all, someone was making peanut. Ruggla. Hey, don't want to interrupt this, but I got some Ruggla to make in the middle of our knitting. Listen, you can have a scarf, you can have a toiletries bag, you can have regula.

We do, you've got everything here. A slut sister, seaweed sister. Listen, Heather DeBro did her job. We came in for Heather DeBro and we left being a fan of Crafts CTV. We want Crafts CTV. I'm in to Crafts CTV. That's what I want in HD, those two. That was wonderful.

Also, I'm going to learn to knit now. Yeah. I'm taking my second sewing class. I'm going to learn to knit now. Yeah. I'm taking my second sewing class. I'm going to level two next week. Assume I have done with COVID. Really excited. I'm so excited for you. Good for you sticking with that.

This is our next chapter, Ben. We're always thinking what happens if the housewives are dead? Like, what are we going to do? We can never wait tables. We can never drive Uber. Again, what are we going to do? Crafts of TV.

Crafts of TV. I thought, no, I'm not even gonna go on Crafts, CTV. You know what? We do need a feud. And you know who we're starting it with? These bitches. Off our needle. Crafts, CTV, ladies. Yeah.

Let's come for the Crafts, CTV, ladies. Yeah, the off your needles, ladies. Guess what? They sell heroin. Hey, off your needles, ladies. The only way you got that was because you were on your measles. Okay. How about you get off your measles and get some real nitten talent before you go slutting

around. Hey, guess what? You can't crochet condoms, you idiots. Hey, man, why do I keep getting getting COVID because you can't crochet your own COVID mask dead. What's the important what's the point of embroidering your own dress if you're just going to always take it off for men? Okay, where are we?

So people are arriving at Heather DeBros event. The life has changed by the way. Where she's starting a crafting network. Okay. Merid menus on place for the HD event. And Heather's like, look honey, it's my network. And he's like, wow, this is so awesome. Awesome ends with an E, which is an actual network.

Did I make you to success on? Love your cute little mirrored things. You spent all my E money on though. Those are cute. So, yeah, Tamran and Jen show up both wearing their neon green. She's like, I don't know who are better. I'll give it to Jen because I've already been hard

enough on this girl, which means that she's gearing up to be hard on her again. She's like, I'll give you one compliment before I'm tearing to pieces again. Yeah. I'm gonna be breaded means that she's gearing up to be hard on her again. She's like, I'll give you one compliment before I'm tear to pieces again. Yeah. I'm gonna be brother, that's right. I'm going to be brother, that's right. I'm going to be brother, that's right.

I'm going to be brother, that's right. I'm going to be brother, that's right. I'm going to be brother, that's right. I'm going to be brother, that's right. I'm going to be brother, that's right. I'm going to be brother, that's right. I'm going to be brother, that's right. I'm going to be brother, that's right.

I'm going to be brother, that's right. I'm going to be brother, that's right. I'm going to be brother, that's right. I'm going to be brother, that's right. I'm going to be brother, that's right. I'm going to be brother, that's right. I'm going to be brother, that's right. I'm going to be brother, that's right. I'm going to be brother, that's right. I'm going to be brother, that's right. Hi, gorgeous girls, everybody. And those weird, Audrey Hepburn girls are walking around like the fucking knitting ladies trying to compete with our party. Having the knitting party,

Crapsies having a party on the same night as us at the Chili's bitches. Details by Haley. So, and- Haley's like, do not tell the girls that I did the Craftsie party. Ha ha ha ha. She's just trying to coast off of Hailey Bieber's name recognition.

Yeah, I'm details by Hailey Bieber. So Emily's asking if Shannon's coming today and Heather says, no. And she goes, oh, well, did you tell you she wasn't coming? So now we have the saga. And by saga, I mean, two weeks earlier, Shannon told Heather that she might be going to Texas to visit her daughter. And she's like, and so I kept asking her, are you coming to my party? And she kept saying, I don't know. So I finally texted her on Tuesday, hey, are you coming or you going to Texas? And I never heard back until 20 minutes ago.

until 20 minutes ago. Oh, jee, wow, that's terrible. Are you gonna have an extra one of those edible flowers wrapped in soggy cucumber left? I hope that you don't have any of those left over. I thought it would be horrible, I shan't. But all the clips they show this are so funny, because Shannon obviously never plans like coming to this, right?

Yeah, she's like, then. So, are you coming? Well, I might be going to Texas because Sophie lives there and she thinks she's owning the lips So I need to make a little emergency Dr. So that means you can't come to my party because you're not gonna go to Texas on the date of my part Well, I will not be in Texas on the date if you're when did you say that was? I don't think I can come on that day

Did I mention Sophie lives in Texas? You said you're not going to Texas, but you live there. So I don't have to go to your stupid party. Oh my ass. I've got some emotional debris at my asshole. I gotta go. I can't make it. I can't. So then the girls are telling Gina that Shannon's not coming. So Gina's like wow, I'm surprised by that because like this is important to you have Wow, do you want to be mad at Shannon now because this is so big for you and Shannon's not here? Wow This is very important to me and Shannon's like You know what Heather? What is happening with Shannon? Or is that the vault? Is that in the vault?

People say the vault a lot. So what is a real ladder top? Is that a restaurant? Is that a restaurant? They're going to beach that we should be going to? And Emily's like, whoa, I don't know about you. I don't know, but you know what Shannon did say something. Yes, uh-oh, I'm drinking.

You know, I need to stop drinking. I need to stop drinking. Everybody's talking to someone stop me. Heather need to stop drinking. Everybody's someone stopped me Heather told me Shannon was talking shit about me a bravo con And then when I asked like what did she say she said oh, I can't tell you because it's in the vault It's in the vault. I'm just so irritated by her. I don't even know where our friendship stands I mean if you're gonna give me half the information Then please give me a taco too So now Emily's mad that Heather tried to turn her against Shannon but won't say what Shannon

actually said. And then we see their panel at BravoCon and it's super innocent, I think. Blake chose a very innocent. It was like, I didn't understand. I actually didn't even understand the clip. It was just like them talking. I think it was just evidence that they were at BravoCon. So I think they're like everyone to come to BravoCon in Vegas. So, um, then we see Heather and Terry hugging and Heather is like, by the way, we closed tomorrow morning and

she says, people typically hate moving, but this experience feels like a really fun adventure. I mean we backed. I'm like, But this experience feels like a really fun adventure. I mean we packed. I'm like you didn't pack You hired a bunch of peons to pack for you, which is why it was fun for you because you just had to walk around and boss people Wow, I've never had more fun than having 50 people in our house packing things up and me yelling at them. What a joy I know. Yeah, I can't believe you had fun doing that Heather. It's crazy Yeah, people hate moving things But people love watching a line of ants carry a slice of water. I'm not in my car too.

That's what I mean. Yeah, if you see a line of ants and they just have a relief and it's just like going around, it's like stop, guys, look, there's a leaf. And there's just one smiling ant behind them all, like, do not drop that, or you will lose your life. I'll get you, bro, ants. If you ever drop that leaf, will lose your life. I'm not a good bro, aunt.

If you ever drop that leaf, this will cost you a lot. And I don't just mean leaves. Well, big news. We sold our ant hill for $55 million. I mean, we see a clip of her moving, bossing people around and she's like, Okay, let's take the fun-vue glasses and the Bacarat stuff. No, no, no, no, put down Bert.

He's coming with the house. Leave Bert Bacarat there. Okay, the glasses. I met the glasses. It's everybody here poor. We literally have Bert Bacarats, dead body in our household, reimbombed them, and made them part of our tree installation. Listen, we needed coasters.

So yeah, there's like, we moved. We're now a tell. I'm living on a adrenaline. A adrenaline. We, guys, guys, I checked it into a hotel. I'm living on a adrenaline. A adrenaline. Guys, guys, I checked it into a hotel. I'm living off the adrenaline right now. Living off of it. She's so ridiculous. Living, well, everything I've offended, it's in the center. My heart is beating.

So we see their hotel room. It's a penthouse suite of someplace amazing. You know, it's like two stories that overlooks all city. And she's like, wow, this is a very nice room. And Terry's like, how big is this place? She's like, well, we've got the living room down there. Plus us upstairs, plus two for the kids that are gonna come in here. Plus. Plus of course those idiots brought Bert.

He's still sitting down there on the balcony. We've really got to do something about that. I don't want worms starting to come out. Refrigurate Bert and refrigerate Bert. Oh, I don't know how long we'll have to slum it here. So they got their final like funds from escrow and everything. And so there's like a fish in new owner and so they're gonna like they're gonna go say goodbye to the house after the party. And Heather tells us that she wants to celebrate, but now it's not the

right moment. She's gonna keep this one close to the vests, which she also needed by herself by watching CWFC TV. Right. You can't really brag about selling a $50 million home when you're trying to ask people to sign up for 1999. You can't. If it comes to your subscriptions, like. You can't brag about selling your home for $55 million when Gina's just shut up with like a stick and a

bundle on her shoulder, like, wow, can't wait for the free lunch. She literally looks like she's worrying about this week. I was saying it in the crappy hour thing, but she's wearing this outfit that's all strung to you. It's like strings. It looks like she bought it at like, if BB met Gadzooks, okay, it's like that.

And I somewhat posted it online and said, when did Kelly Bundy join the cast and work it down? And I, When did Kelly Bundy join the cast don't work down? Please stop making me laugh so hard my chest hurts. I'm ill. Oh my god, that was so funny. So, so for poor Gina, don't say anything in front of Gina. Please. She still thinks that closet we pulled her a wedding dress out of it's an actual apartment!

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