Watch What Crappens - RHOC: Roped Into A New Season

Episode Date: July 18, 2018

The Real Housewives of Orange County are back, and they're all friends! At least, that's what they're telling us. And we're happy to go along with it. Come join us as we catch up on Shannon's... divorce, Kelly's single life, Vicki's love tank, and Tamra's tears. Plus, a new girl named Emily! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watch What Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chas, and Brittany Brave to name a few, follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch what crap ends would like to think it's premium sponsors! Christy Wowardy-Dowardy! Kelly Barlow, when she goes Barlow, we go high-low.
Starting point is 00:00:36 Megan Berg, you can't have a burger without the burger! Just saying, okay! Shannon out of a cannon Anthony! Megan the Slayer Taylor. Anna got I love that banana Anderson. Susie going to the Tobin. Hava Nagila Weber. Ashley Savoni she don't take no baloney.
Starting point is 00:00:56 And our super premium Patreon subscribers. Kelly Grant, Vegrant Master. Give them hell. Miss Noel. The incredible edible Matthews sisters! And Lizzie Drucker, a fun motherfucker! Watch what crap is! Watch what crap is!
Starting point is 00:01:14 Who cares what happens when there's so much that crap is! Poppins! Poppins! Poppins! Poppins! Poppins! Watch what crap is! Watch what crap is! Hey everyone, welcome to Watch Our Crappens ends a podcast about all that crap on bravo that we just love to watch I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me as usual is Ronnie Karim who can also be found on the Rose Prick's bachelor roast podcast What's going on Ronnie? Oh?
Starting point is 00:01:58 Hello, man. How are you doing on this? Oh my god after a premiere day? You know, I'm doing real good. I'm doing great everything's Right what do you think real housewives of Orange County is gonna suck a big donkey ball? They come out with at ropes course, and then I fell off my chair. It was hilarious They come out with that ropes course. And then I fell off my chair. It was hilarious. So we want you to fall if you're chair too, and definitely come see us live.
Starting point is 00:02:30 Go to watchrocrapids.com for all our tour dates. We're going to a lot of cities. Cities you may not even realize. This week we're going to Philadelphia. The Friday night show is pretty much sold out. I mean it is sold out, but some people are posting tickets here and there that they can't use. But Thursday, there's still tickets available.
Starting point is 00:02:49 We'll be talking about Real House, House of New York on Thursday, Southern Charm on Friday. It's gonna be super fabulous. It's gonna be Philly Tastic. And of course, we have these new Trixi Monaco, and the three R Monctopus T-shirts with free shipping for the neck for a limited time available and
Starting point is 00:03:08 Everything is at watchrocraftens.com then next we bring on a Montreal for the just for lefts Comedy festival, which is like the biggest comedy festival in the world It's like Kevin Hart and Trevor Noah and like Tiffany Haddish like people who are like super famous and then us and us So we want to make a really good impression. So everyone comes to us there. And the good thing is it's not just us. You can try to, you can go see other people too that are like really super funny and hilarious. So make a weekend out of it.
Starting point is 00:03:36 All those details on our website. And that's pretty much it. Ronnie, there's something we did not talk about yesterday because we were so excited about Potomac Oddly enough we skipped we I think we even said we were gonna talk about and then we didn't we didn't even talk about the big news The big loon news in the in the universe Which is that would you believe it girls? I'm going back to rehab
Starting point is 00:04:00 Well, well how sad and coinc. How at the same time? Yeah, the when, check yourself back into rehab either Sunday or or Monday. Um, this, this happened about two days after news broke that her kids were suing her, and also her ex, because she didn't set up a trust that she was supposed to for them. Um, and also like a day or two before the reunion, which is taping today. So she will not be at the bravo reunion,
Starting point is 00:04:28 which feels a little bit like. I feel like I'm like, I feel robbed. I feel like talking about no trust. I feel like my trust has been broken. I feel like this is. Yeah, that's how I feel. I feel totally, I'm never trusting anybody again. And look, I trusted people and I watched the bachelor.
Starting point is 00:04:43 Yeah, and I still had trust in people, but no, it is gone. But the news reports are saying, well, the news, Barbara Walters came on. That's how much I watched the news. But the news reports were saying that she wanted to go, but her friends, her close friends were saying, no, Lou, I think it's time for a little happy. Oh, what's the difference with those? I don't know, Bethany. So I feel really bad, you know, I teased because it is kind of coincidental, but it is also really a rough road addiction. So good, you know, you must do, babe. Good luck.
Starting point is 00:05:16 Take care of that. I mean, it is obviously the best move. It's like, obviously what she should be doing, you know, but couldn't you wait it like one more day because like the reunion surely would have, I mean, she would have been at rock bottom if she went to the reunion. She's just at the bottom now.
Starting point is 00:05:32 She could have been at rock bottom and then I feel like it would have been a more valuable rehab experience. Yes, you need to hit rock bottom before you can truly get better. And, you know, Twitter would have helped you while watching a month-long reunion. Come on, Lou.
Starting point is 00:05:45 It's a, if her friends convinced her to go to rehab, like, and, and who avoid the reunion, it kind of sucks because Luan has been having her best season of all time. I mean, this has been Luan's epic, epic season. She's doing great. She has this cabaret, this, this cabaret thing. She's selling out everywhere. I mean, she looks great.
Starting point is 00:06:02 Everything is on the upswing. And this was going to be her victory lap. This reunion, you know, she looks great. Everything is on the upswing, and this was gonna be her victory lap this reunion. You know, she could have gone after Ramona. She could have gone after everyone, basically. And it's a shame she doesn't get that moment. And then she's gonna go on to rehab. And then go back to rehab. Yeah, man.
Starting point is 00:06:20 Yesterday was a really rough day. My cousin's cat died. So, hugs to her. That was so sad. And then Annabelle died. And I to her. That was so sad. And then um, Annabelle died. And I know it sounds crazy that I'm like, uh, cat, then a human, you know, but still like when you have a pet that's like your little person, you know, and then my, my Annabelle, my Annabelle from ladies of London passed and then Lewand went back
Starting point is 00:06:39 to rehab. Then I went outside and the Russian old place across the street have like five fire trucks and three policemen, which means like multiple people probably died over there. I was like, you know what? Yesterday, how about you just fucking end? Okay. And then when I woke up today, I was like, good news. It's not yesterday anymore. Congratulations. Yeah. I believe in yesterday. I believe that yesterday was a batch. Yesterday. I don't remember how much of it seems so far away. You know, it doesn't seem so far away. Real House was a Orange County.
Starting point is 00:07:16 Oh, that's because it's only about an hour down the highway from us right now. Yeah, real houses of Orange County was also yesterday, Ronnie. So that should have been like cut out of your yesterday sadness because it was the yesterday happiness. Well, you know, Vicki did cry and it was very hurtful to her. So, you know, that was rough, too. I forgot to add the Vicki almost last your finger thing into the things about said yesterdays. So why don do we dive into our season? What's the season 35?
Starting point is 00:07:47 What season is this? Yeah, this is the season, 1900 and 56, okay? Yeah, you just have to cut Vicki in half and count how many rings are inside her. Now, we are a huge believers in yesterday, just kidding. We're huge believers in the Orange County, even though last season, I mean,
Starting point is 00:08:08 people have their issues with last season. It was not the best season. We laughed our asses off, I think every recap, but it didn't have a best season. So we're big believers. I have huge faith that this show is gonna come back to it's glory self, but you don't really, you're not really helping things when you start with Tam crying.
Starting point is 00:08:28 Yes. Yeah, that says, this is exactly. Like we could, we could start on a better foot. I think we're going to have a slow beginning. We're going to work our way up to the really good stuff. Yeah, I mean, you have given Eddie Hart surgery the week before you started shooting. Like, why do you have to do it the day you start shooting?
Starting point is 00:08:45 See, here's the thing, Bravo, you gotta work on your scheduling. Luanne goes to rehab after reunion. Tamara had an Eddie Hart surgery before the show. That's how you do it. Yeah, I was like, oh my god, this is how we're starting. This new redemption season is Tamara crying. Uh, so, yeah, so basically, uh, Eddie are, are in their house and there are a bunch of movers and everything and they're just like hugging and Eddie's like, wow, I haven't
Starting point is 00:09:13 seen my house this empty in a long time and I'm like, well, emotionally it's been very empty for years. Yeah, give your house a little credit, will you? Get it for trying to be the emptiest house it possibly can be. And then, of course, you know, this is a very sad scene we're about to get into, but these two cut fitnesses work up fitness hats in it. It's like, okay, you know, I know we're going to be talking about heart disease and husband loss, but there's no reason not to promote our gym.
Starting point is 00:09:38 Yeah, exactly. With its warped floors. I'm shocked that the gym is still in business. I mean, I guess, I guess when you have like probably a rent of $300 a month because you're in like the warehouse district of Tuston and helps but Well, this this opening is an opening of reminders. It's like we're still married We still have a business that you can totally support and Eddie is still not gay, okay? Because Eddie's like they have to realize We're not gonna have sex in this house anymore. Okay Eddie. Yeah, okay, cuz Eddie's like they have to realize we're not gonna have sex in this house anymore. Okay Eddie. Yeah Hey, and then Ryan just appears out of nowhere like do you realize I'm screwing in a light bulb right here? That's what me and your mom do
Starting point is 00:10:15 Totally heterosexual and everybody totally cares. It was a very sick moment. So They're no they're moving they're moving into a new house together because it's always been Eddie's house. Now they're just going to have a house together. And there's going to be the camera wants to have a house party once it's all up and running. But one problem, Eddie doesn't want Vicki at the house or party. Oh, no. Well, you know, Eddie don't have a say in that relationship anyway. What the hell? Exactly, but he says he's open to an apology. So there's that. Yeah, yeah, because we're just gonna forget everything now You know Eddie's not but everyone else is like well that was last season. Yeah, it's okay and Tamer's like you know
Starting point is 00:10:58 me and Becca are working on our relationship Look at that. Yeah, you know, I know I do believe that she's 100% sorry, but you know better set. Yeah, which is pretty much how every season begins. There's every season begins with Tamer declaring that they're working on their friendship again. Yes, and Eddie's heart thing is he he was noticing that he was having a heart rate of more than 200, whatever beats a minute while he was working out. And I'm like, I have that walking the dog. Yeah. Okay. Like somebody come pick me up immediately. I didn't realize I was in trouble until I saw this.
Starting point is 00:11:31 Yeah. So, uh, so he has to have like, he has to basically get like an a-fib or, uh, or he has a-fib and he has to get like, um, it's like a very, very standard procedure for dealing with it. Like, like I've- I would- It is? Yeah, I have like have to close people to me who have had it. It's like super standard and simple. I mean, I think if we're talking about the same thing,
Starting point is 00:11:55 and you know, by the way, you know me, I'm always good for talking out of my ass, maybe I need a procedure on my ass so I can stop talking out of it. Yeah, well, that would be an amazing ass. No one would ever get that procedure to shut that up. That's silent to me. My ass is on dark now. Yeah, well, that would be an amazing ass. No one would ever get that procedure to shut that up. That's silent to us. My ass is on to work.
Starting point is 00:12:11 You got to feel bad when somebody's like, oh my god, my husband could die. So I felt bad for her. But it also made me realize I need to stop going to the Apple store and asking them why my watch is beeping. It's really not a broken watch. Well, I also feel like I do, it's scary if someone that you know has to have a heart, a heart procedure that's scary. But Tamra is also good
Starting point is 00:12:32 for like over dramatizing every single thing. She's like, oh my God, that's I went to see Barker to get a roll of corners. I never had a car. I'm not sure I could ever do lunch again. I was just self-check out and every time I scanned something it would beep, beep, and it reminded me that it is gonna die one day now. Yeah, welcome back to a really fun season of real house, so I was supporting you, Cam.
Starting point is 00:12:58 Yeah, exactly. So, yes, and now Tamerins and her mom, which is like crying together, she's like, oh, it's gonna be okay. And he's not gonna die. He's not gonna die. It's whatever bitch mom, whatever bitch. Tamer is like, he better not be because I've been scheduled a season premiere to be today.
Starting point is 00:13:15 We could get that. And he better not die today. He better wait till the season finale. Bitch. The mom is so sweet. I really like her mom. She's wearing a shirt that says grateful. It's like that's she's trying so hard to be positive and tamers like
Starting point is 00:13:27 But he could die best god tamer. I'm wearing the shirt. Why you got a waisted? So then we go over to Vicki and Steve who were hanging out At I guess her house and she's like oh, yeah Well, you know what my dad's birthday is today and like, oh, is that the bird of the window? She's like, oh yeah, that's the bird of the window. Hey dad Hey dad, oh you look like a toka poop looks like you took a poop on the windows that your wave Percenting a birthday gift to yourself. Oh dad. Yeah, just like dad to poop on the window Can we check you about it? You know look at that bird knocking at the window That was like the most in boxes bird ever that's such a vicky dad bird, you know, that's like the most in Moxus bird ever, that's such a vicky dad bird.
Starting point is 00:14:05 You know, it's like, boom, boom, boom, boom. Banging is how to get the window. I get it. Did you notice that this scene started with the now clapped, the new classic beginning of the house was of Orange County, where it's like quiet. Yes.
Starting point is 00:14:19 Oh, oh, oh. And then a close up of a parent, like a rampant parent on the street. It made me think of you. Yeah, they're still doing their little big little lies. Attempting to do big little lies. Big, big lies. I know.
Starting point is 00:14:34 Yeah. Starring Taberns. So Steve is like, oh, I'm going to do the backyard. At some point, she's like, what are you going to do to it? What are you going to do to it? To the backyard. Like, are you going to do it now? Would you move it for me? Like, what are you going to do the backyard. At some point, she's like, what are you going to do to it? What are you going to do to it? To the backyard. Are you going to do it now when you move it formally? Like what are you going to do?
Starting point is 00:14:49 What are you going to woo who with the backyard? A bus? Are you going to do it in a spare husband? Because I need you to be biased, but okay. Yeah. I need you to submit your change of woo who address, okay? That's what I need you to do. I need you to admit to all your friends where you're whooping it up now.
Starting point is 00:15:03 Okay. It's in the neighborhood of Cotto. Okay. So, um, Vicki apparently talked to Shannon and Shannon has been struggling about, you know, the David situation because they're divorced. And Vicki's like, well, you know, she should have listened to me about David, but she didn't, I'm like, there it is. Yeah, there's Vicki.
Starting point is 00:15:22 Yeah, she has the best. That's my daughter. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Yeah. She's like, well, you know, by ex-iscailing married this weekend. And I'm happy for her, you know, woohoo for Brooks. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, pity girl he's marrying though. Antibu, woohoo.
Starting point is 00:15:55 I said to be the imaginary trapper keeper with the imaginary medical records. So, you know, woohoo, happy wedding, OK? And then they show clips of Vicky with Brooks. Like, well, look, Brooks, you know, you want to get married But are you gonna do my lab? What are you gonna do my lab? What are you gonna get your change of woohoo Brooks? Okay, you're the bad back up So Vicki is saying how she wants like she wants Steve to
Starting point is 00:16:17 You know proposed or cuz she wants to be married again and she's like saying how she's not good alone And she wants her love tank filled. And I'm just like, I'm actually, her love tank, like, you know, salsa, you know. It's like, well, I had to help Vicki fill her love tank, but I'm gonna be in, I'm gonna be in Marina for the day.
Starting point is 00:16:38 So I, yeah, I just melted some ice cream and funneled it down. You know, technically vanilla ice cream becomes cream and fuddled it down. You know, technically even though ice cream becomes cream on glaze when it's melted. You know, I put some milk in there. By the time I come home, it's gonna be cottage cream. I put some heavy whipping cream in their love tank. So it looks like we'll have like a little tear
Starting point is 00:17:00 on the soup afterwards. And then she, you know, does the same service to herself and she says, it should have been a tabra, but I didn't. You'd also work with both ways. And then she does the other thing about Tamer about, you know, again, you know, like whatever it is about, like, you know, moving forward with her and everything and she's learning, she's like, you know what, from now on, I'm just going to shout my mouth when I have an opinion that's what I've learned. I'm like, no, I hate that. Don't say that. That's learning, she's like, you know what, from now on, I'm just gonna shout my mouth when I have an opinion, that's what I've learned.
Starting point is 00:17:25 I'm like, no, I hate that. Don't say that, that's not what it's about. It's not like, oh, you're the victim, you just have to keep it to yourself because no one else can handle it. It's like, no, have the judgment to know when you're saying some crazy shit that's gonna hurt someone.
Starting point is 00:17:38 It's not you have to keep all your opinions to yourself. Yeah, also, you just literally said, she should've listened to me, but she didn't, on national TV. So, I was like, okay, I've started to go, I've started to go, right? Yeah, you know, they said she should have listened to me, but she didn't on national TV. So I was like, okay, I'm starting to go for a start to go for. Yeah, you know, they'd be allowed to be those girls. Some of them, you know, I mean, just some of the flip around like a happy Tato. Is that the right word? Happy Tato. Is that it? He's like, oh, well, is that going in the love tank too? We can, we can arrange that. Potato tiramisu. I can't wait till my friends on the first taste that. So
Starting point is 00:18:08 Tamra is moving into this new house. That's not going to go fast. Like a good no one plays the piano in this. I know what I mean well first the piano is probably what she calls her couch. We call my couch piano. It's like she'd be this person who would do that for some reason. Yeah I'm talented I play it. Oh yeah, Batch! She probably has an annoying player piano. She got off of the hemic or slimmer catalog.
Starting point is 00:18:29 She's like, look at that bat just playing the entertainer by Scott Chaplin. Like Chaplin. Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do Oh So she's like well, I wanted to move in here before surgery, but it's under construction But it's fun because Eddie can sit for a couple of weeks I was like how's he gonna sleep if it's under construction Here's camera thoughtful partner is ever. I know I like how the new house looks exactly like the old house except it just has like a Bankette, you know, it's like exactly the same house except it just has like a bankette you know it's like exactly the same. And shaman calls and you can tell because they're angry. David David David David David David.
Starting point is 00:19:13 Hello, bats. Hi, sweet shaman. I know. I can't hear you over the sandals got job. God, I forgot that the entertainer had the word fetching it so many times. Oh, it sounds like the jazz. H over there. Oh, so Tamra is like, oh my God, we're still under construction for 28 days.
Starting point is 00:19:39 And I'm excited for you. Yeah, Timmer is like, yeah, yeah, batch. The house is in finish and she goes, are you kidding? Are you kidding? Uh, Kelly wants to see it, but I'm like, it's nothing ginormous. Okay, it's on the 4,000 square feet. Okay, everyone starts freaking out.
Starting point is 00:20:02 Um, let's all stop bitching about our house being 4,000 feet. How about that? I think about that. I think about that. About that. I've had enough about that. Yeah, stop house shaming us. Okay, you fuckers. Also, Tamer That's like the biggest house you've ever lived in except for the years you were married to what's his buns. So stop phoning. So stop faking it. Okay. Yeah, exactly. So speaking of 4,000 square foot houses, we now go to Shaddy's new house, which is also 4,000 square feet. Haha! No! Ha! Ha! Ha! This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so fun. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so. This is so For the outfit square be baby God damn it. I went from 4,000 I went from 14,000 square feet to 14,000 negative feelings about David So we open with her in her tiny tiny kitchen and she's talking to you Stella one of her daughters
Starting point is 00:21:02 And she's like oh Stella this those cracks on your phone screen against Stella. Don't rub them. Stella, their Stella comes out, and she comes out of the crack, so the phone, and you can cut your finger, you can cut your finger on the crack. Stella, someone called Dr. Moon. We have a fingertip emergency. I'm calling Dr. Moon, and I know, ah, I used Stella's phone. No, no
Starting point is 00:21:26 You broke a screen two weeks ago. You're gonna use your Christmas money to buy yourself a new screen So figure it out. She's like I thought dad would buy it. She's like I'm not playing that came here. I am not playing that game Dr. Moon. I'd like to report my daughter. She needs a holistic exorcism Dr. Moon, I'd like to report my daughter. She needs a holistic exorcism. Yeah. Please repair the cracks in Stella's screen. Her soul screen still happens to be that's your mother. Here, Lysha, I'm a door.
Starting point is 00:21:58 Killed by a thousand little cracks in the iPhone screen. Cutting her little fingers. I couldn't, I was trying to go there with one but my fingers were bleeding so much and the phone didn't it's David didn't realize how I was trying to press the numbers I kept going through one one and I was like I don't need it for my sharp parks and roads. I need Dr. Moon. Hello this is Lisa Vanderpump. We are taking our commercial break now, but if you don't hear one, don't worry. You're very lucky.
Starting point is 00:22:31 Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, someday, parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful take on parenting. Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brownall, we will be your resident not so expert experts. Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding, and thinking, oh yeah, I have absolutely been there. We'll talk about what went right and wrong. What would we do differently?
Starting point is 00:23:08 And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone. So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon music or Wondery app. So then her other kids Sophie, one of her other kids comes in and she's like, so what's up with Haiti? Huh?
Starting point is 00:23:34 Just total normal everyday conversation with your kid. What's up in Haiti? Bethany comes in like, I'll tell you what's up with Haiti. Hey, how about this? Guess what? As strong doesn't work. Be strong. That works. Okay. Sorry. Oh, so Sophie's like, I have a church trip to Haiti. So just have you told your dad, I mean, that's sort of a big deal. So, okay. Oh, I guess I'll talk to your father about an iPhone screen, but not Haiti. Talk to your father about Haiti and iPhone screens please he's kids so she's like this is a household full of love so we will now call it lovey not Haiti. Be strong. Get out of my house.
Starting point is 00:24:24 Be strong. Here's a t-shirt okay. Hashtag to say to me. Be strong. Be strong. Hit the T-shirt. Okay? Hashtag we were there with Bethany? Okay. Hey, hey, it's Bethany. It's me, Bethany.
Starting point is 00:24:32 Is that too long for a hashtag? Get out! That's the door behind your sofa. Well, I do have to say that didn't I communicate via text, an email, and they aren't pleasant. Let's just leave it at that. His new signature is, go fuck yourself, Shannon, which I think is very rude that he says that to every single person in emails. Unfortunately for him, there are such a thing as screen-take-shotty pictures. So you can hear all the
Starting point is 00:24:57 math those text emails at the Jeff Lewis radio show on Series XM. Any day of the week I'm not discussing it here. I'm shocked that David can send so many emails and so many negative texts. I would have thought by now his phone would have been so full of sand from walking on the beach with those bitches. And just for the real shout out to Jeff show, oh my god. So Shannon showed Jeff all of these texts that David's been sending her and they're horrible and mean and terrible. And so then Jeff talked about it.
Starting point is 00:25:26 So David texts a Jeff, all these evil mean texts and yelled at him. Oh, God. So you know, you mess with Jeff Lewis. Not wise. So Jeff, just write all of those on the air too. Yeah, really stupid, David. Do you ever think you're ever going to win a fight with Jeff Lewis, especially as his own radio show?
Starting point is 00:25:42 It's not going to work. Yeah, put your eyes back in your head, David. Okay, go go off and have a live your life. Okay. Yeah, yeah, eat some potato chips, chips abusive. Okay, he can eat some potato shit too. Well, you just got potato shit, it's named it's Archie, but we'll get to that in a minute. We all certainly get to that. So now we go to Kelly Dodd's new townhouse, which is hilarious because we were there we So Kelly did not yeah, what? Seena we've seen that. Well, it's not a town. It's the two bedroom
Starting point is 00:26:15 Well, he she even says it to bedroom like the breaches are trying so hard to make it seem glamorous It's like yeah, I live in a I live in a two bedroom our friend Becky used to live in that apartment so it's like it's funny because it's definitely that's I Kelly is the one who did the real downsizing. I mean she she downsize into like a normal person's apartment, you know. Yeah, because that place was huge to clean her other house. It's enormous. It's like four stories. Oh my god. So many things everywhere you move, there's like another gigantic room. You know? It's beautiful, but that's hard to clean.
Starting point is 00:26:48 And a room I can't get up all those stairs. No. The room was probably committed suicide 10 million times. Somebody done those stairs. I mean, do you remember the big episode last year at Kelly's house? And how many arguments took place in that staircase? Because it was like nothing but staircases. You know, they just, they just just made us a house of staircases. Yes, every time you took it's like, Shanna had to keep marching up and down the stairs
Starting point is 00:27:09 and that's sun hat. That hat. That's the straw hat. Okay, so Kelly's with her kids, Jolie. Jolie, she's like, have a school. The kids like, I have an AP coach, mommy. It's like, is he? Yeah. Katie, Kelly says, dating after the divorce is easy. It's like fishing with dynamite.
Starting point is 00:27:34 Which you probably also does. You probably take a time. It sticks out into the ocean's lake. What's wrong with this? Well, that was like more of a Leab Black, but Leab Black does a tune for What's wrong with this? Well that was more of a Leo Black, but Leo Black does it to him, sure. That's Leo Black just doing Kelly scenes. I don't like everyone, but I can date everyone. Ho ho ho. Oh.
Starting point is 00:27:52 Ah! Ah! Yeah. Yeah, so Kelly is like, she's thrown herself into this. She's loving life. She's like, she doesn't care. She's in a two bedroom. She's like, I love it.
Starting point is 00:28:03 I'm in a two bedroom. I'm dating. She'll He's over there. I got a swing set by my bed. That's covered in rags. I love it. So she's trying to help with the map homework, but she can't and it's so funny. The music that's playing because she goes, how much math do you have? And the kids like, I have to find a prime practice, a son of a factor in the addition of a, you know, whatever, a square thing. And Kelly understands math as well as that sentence that I just spouted out. And she they're playing like Kelly clown music. It's like, she's a factor.
Starting point is 00:28:43 You know, she hears this prime and she's like, I'm in my prime. So Vicki and Shannon, they beat up at this weird lunch place. I hate lunch places like this where they just have like a big easy chairs or what they're doing. I'm like, I'm not going to be a kid. I'm not going to be a kid. I'm not going to be a kid. I'm not going to be a kid. I'm not going to be a kid.
Starting point is 00:29:02 I'm not going to be a kid. I'm not going to be a kid. I'm not going to be a kid. I'm not going to be a kid. I'm not going to be a kid. I'm not at this weird lunch place. I hate lunch places like this Where they just have like a big easy chairs or whatever the hell those things are but no like able to eat on what am I supposed to hold my Fight I think it was maybe a coffee shop that also served food That's the only way I could like like figure it out because it was it looked like a living room But it was sort of empty and they were shooting from kind of a low angle And it was like like a wide. It just was awkward. There were these two big blue chairs and they're just
Starting point is 00:29:30 Sitting next to each other almost like they were in a lobby. It was just so Awkward. Yeah, and Vicki looks terrified. Hey, go. Hey girl. Hey girl. Hey, I'm so happy to see you Vicki. Gunvall said Hmm. I am one-ha happy to see you. Okay? I will save the ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Superhero's Band-Aid on three of my fingers. You can just speak to Stella about that. Well, you know, Vicki, here's how it's going. Yesterday I gained weight, but today I'm down 10. You know, scale. Let me ask you a question. Who the fuck do you think you are messing with my head? You know, it's natural. It's just nature. It's how it is. Vicki goes, you know, it's our age. She goes, no, Vicki actually, it's stress. Well, it's also stress. You know, stress that it might be brought upon you by certain
Starting point is 00:30:31 people sitting at your blue chair running across for me. You know, I wish that my body weight would forgive me the same way I forgave the stress that induced it in the first place. Vicki's stress gongles in! Oh, but this is so fun reconnecting with an old friend looking the have-in-go. I'm so happy I'm just friends. And I have high hopes. We'll get to a better place. And then they just keep showing clips of Vicki
Starting point is 00:31:09 in the reunion like, oh my god, I'm so sorry. I just want to be a better person. I just have to say, oh, so, ooh, ooh, ooh, backwards, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, yeah. So the ice, though, does get thought, we we know because first Vicky's asking you say Sad to go sad to go doing and she's like oh well the girls are fine, you know except for the fact that they can't take care of their Cell phones and they're going to hate you But then you know what then when just like let's talk about David and she has like well
Starting point is 00:31:41 Guess what he has a new girlfriend. He's nearly 20 years younger than him. 20 years younger. Oh, that gets her going. Yeah, I saw it on social media. And I knew it was going to happen. But within two months, two days after it posted, I find out two days after. And Vicki's like, do you know where?
Starting point is 00:32:01 Do you know where I've already had coffee with her? Well, she's one of 30,000 girls. You want someone to take care of them May I think five of them are on this show Vicky's a cool. My god, so big of you stay so cab the way you are you know But it isn't I write it's good. That's it. Good that's out. That's it. It's positive out positive positive Good. That's good. That's good. That's's out positive. It positive positive positive good. That's good That's and as I call you guys how that on the wall behind me, Vicki very good vibes vibes good pinkie beyond them. Good vibes only come on 2018 come on good vibes only is our new friendship you just reading things off a wall to me? Just hang in there, Shannon. Just hang in there.
Starting point is 00:32:46 I am not a one-armed cat. These specials are avocado toast. Oh, God damn it. She says egg white or egg strife. We're the God. I don't know what else to say. Only five times ahead. You know what? Potato fries, whole fries.
Starting point is 00:33:09 Potato. Hey, Shen, did you know the Wi-Fi password is five little lowercase i, big w, lowercase i? Well, what's going to password that? I have faith that you're going to be a Venti book. Okay. Hours are from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. Well, I hate your face, but let's decide it's a new year and I'm sick of people being to me on Twitter. So hi, five.
Starting point is 00:33:36 So good to be friends again. So now it's time for Tamra to take Eddie to the hospital and they're cut fitness hats. Yeah. Um, I don't really have much to say about this. Take it away, Ben. Well, there's not much to say, except they're driving and, you know, it's like 4.45 in the morning and it's like no one wants to go into surgery,
Starting point is 00:33:52 especially this or a surgery. And Tam is just like, that you have five years younger. You shouldn't be having heart issues. I'm like, oh, that's real. Thanks, Tamra. It should be me. I think we don't, we don't, we're gonna reduce the anxiety in the car.
Starting point is 00:34:10 And Eddie looks like, you know, miserable as one would be. Yes. And she's like, he just doesn't want to get fat, match. Yeah. When you take something away from a man who loves something, it's like it changes a man. You know, like when I got rid of our lady, Gaga CDs, hasn't been the same. Oh my God, the minute he left that elliptical, was a minute he left.
Starting point is 00:34:34 Oh, the minute, the minute we stopped putting things on the shelves that kept fitness with the moment his eyes started racing. So next she goes, yeah, she goes to meet, uh, Tamara, she goes to meet Ryan in the coffee place. Coffee places are doing very well in OC today. Oh, I mean, just, it's just a hot bed of activity. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:56 She gets there and he's like, so how did the surgery go? So she's like, well, the good news is that it's done and he's resting. But Well, the good news is that it's done and he's resting. But he may have to do it again because it's a regular in other places. I'm like, it's fine. It's fine. It'll get it done again. It's okay, Tamra. And whereas just watching her hyperventilate because he sees it all the time, he's like, I'm like, listen, you're gonna make you're gonna make this poor guy crazy. I mean,. He's like, I'm like, listen, you're going to make this poor guy crazy. I mean, obviously, it's like, you know, doing this, doing this is like worse than not doing not having to do it. Of course, but like, you're going to make him crazy. It's like it's routine. Then we keep
Starting point is 00:35:37 calls in. She's like, how facts? She's like, honey, so tell me, is he alive? Yeah, he's alive. It's he, is he breathing? Yeah, he's alive. It's he is he breathing. Yeah, it's breathing. It's he's acting on to pee this I'm just asking for a friend It's hurting. I'm not spreading it. Just heard it. That's spreading it. Do you want me to be using something? Maybe a juice You want a juice? I can be giving juice casserole. It's a casserole in a bottle. You want that? Ryan mouths a fucking juice ran mouths a fucking juice. Tim was like, no, it's okay. I'll talk to you later.
Starting point is 00:36:06 Just that was not a spec a call. Rangos, yeah, apparently juice, juice helps people in troubling times. She met well, you know, considering that he's someone who was fond of juice saying, I'm sure he understands. And there's like she can get, she's like, he's offering you something that can cause you growth later. No, not that kind of juice ran.
Starting point is 00:36:29 Jesus Christ patch. Wait, why would she offer you something that's can give you back me? I don't get it. So she's like, well, my nest may be pebbles, but that juice did my pecs well. And my hair line. So then, I haven't heard from Shannon. Like, let's see. Classic Tamer is still in there. Yeah. So Kelly and Jolie go to dinner and meet up with Vicki.
Starting point is 00:36:53 But before Vicki gets there, Kelly says, why don't you get the grilled kale and avocado? Mmm, Jolie's like, oh, wow, you mom, fuck you in the face. I'm getting mozzarella sticks. Totally, you go, Jolly, I'm with you. Yeah, why don't you get the glass of water for your appetizer? Fuck you, mom. Oh, so Vicki is not worried about Kelly. Okay, she's doing great. She was that happily buried.
Starting point is 00:37:23 There it is, okay. I said it. I'm not worried about Kelly fighting G'day. She's. She was that happily buried. There it is. Okay. I said it. I'm not worried about Kelly fighting again. She's happy to be ready to be go. She's ready to be go. It's Kelly. Come on. And Julie's like, yeah, she's doing well. She's doing good. And Kelly goes, that's the truth, Ruth. I was like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh avocado I am leaving our townhouse. Have you touched the shattered because they've been saying to get 34
Starting point is 00:37:46 years. I mean, I don't want to say anything got to be. I'm just saying that. Dude, I hope Michael will get a date. Yeah, that sounds hot. You said, at least just like Jesus Christ. What are you? La la la la la. She's taking you like two avocado halves and just putting them up against her ears.
Starting point is 00:38:03 Well, you know, she must be trained. So it's hard for her. Okay. Well, why does she date then she and I need to go on dates. Oh, yeah. She's a she day. She should date to what is it to I need an entire state season of Kelly and and shaman just growing on dates together. It's hilarious. Just throwing plates back and forth at each other. Yeah. Because like, where did you go at dates? How about that? Where did you go at dates, bitch? And Kelly's like, no one likes me.
Starting point is 00:38:34 And Jolie's like, you bring him a different guy. Every single night, he always like, he likes me. And he likes me. No, but he doesn't like me like that, Jolie. Oh my god. Don't tell her everything is great Come on like she's too young it's too much for six great. She starts waving her napkin around like it's a it's an emergency Woohoo
Starting point is 00:38:52 Speaking of emergency who who's in red flags Apparently there was Vicki visited Brianna and Ryan and over and whoever they are and I think they're in South Carolina or North Carolina. And so she put up a picture of like, you know, you said they had to know with the kids. And some of our listeners zoomed in. There was like a little sign on the door.
Starting point is 00:39:13 And if you, when they zoomed in, the sign on the screen doors had like, absolutely no shoes inside. I was like, oh, it's back. Fuck and fairy glitter. Okay, no flakes. No flakes allowed. No flakes. No shoes, but you're allowed to have three guns. You have to wear guns on your feet.
Starting point is 00:39:37 Gun shoes. No shoes in the house. Vicky Gumbleston is staying enough on this family. So now Tamra, now we get to a scene with Tamra and the Negro, Emily. And they're doing that hike that they like to do on this show where they go up some sort of like hill, some dirty hill. Normally this is like the Megan King Edmonds mountain that she likes to hike on, but now it's Tamra and Emily. So Emily shows up in her Tesla and Tamra's like, yeah, she's a party planner by night,
Starting point is 00:40:09 attorney by day. I'm like, I feel like why would you lead with the party planner part? Like, attorney is the impressive part. Yeah. Tamra, I, Tamra's gonna have major problems with this bitch. I love it. Yeah, she's basically, you know, like, you know, the camera, you know, the camera is gonna have a problem. So sorry to interrupt you, but I just, I don't know why I did
Starting point is 00:40:29 actually, but I'm sorry. She's like, you know, she's gonna have a problem because she goes, oh, nothing's changed. She's still in a test. It's like, she, Tamara hates when people are like, richer than her, but not like Heather Dubro richer than her. Exactly. Exactly. As she's driving her Chevy Tahoe around. So, um, uh, said Tamara, uh, she was like, you know, I've always liked that bet. She knows she sort of looks like she knew Kia, but with like, weirder lips, you know,
Starting point is 00:40:56 but like, then something happened. And we learned that Emily invited Ricky to her 40th birthday. And Ricky, as we know, is Orange County's resident game and slash awful person. Slash terrible hair, fantastic Sam model from the 80s. Like his face changed, but the hair is still the same. Oh my goodness. And Tamara has this habit of just like, she gets really close with people
Starting point is 00:41:24 and then she starts hating them and just never speaks So then again, it doesn't tell them why that's what she did with Ricky as what she did with yeah, she's yeah, she erases them The only were the only people watching these seasons only where the only people watching these seasons. Here lies Shambhador. Arise my Tamer. So she's like, got spent years and I'm like, yeah, you know, I mean, I guess I got chaotic because I invited Ricky to my party and I didn't know the circumstances going on between the two of you.
Starting point is 00:41:57 And I mean, you know, I mean, just by the way, I've only seen question once at that time. I'm like, oh, oh, oh, so she's basically playing on the other team I like this cat exactly I felt so bad for Emily because they have been walking for like five like five minutes she's like I'm not mad I don't know I don't think I was rich anymore I was like oh god this poor lady's not I can get the top mountain is she? Well, it's another sign Tamra hates you. She makes your first scene filming climbing a fucking hill. Tamra is a monster, but she's a funny monster.
Starting point is 00:42:33 I am gonna make this the hill you die on. Yeah, and so Tamra says, well, you know, question is part of the I hate Tamra Cloud. Yeah, but you kind of did that to Gretchen. Yeah, I like that she's like coming from this place. Like, now she's nice, so she's the victim of everything now. Exactly. And Gregg and is no, you know, walk in the park. No.
Starting point is 00:42:53 No. Tamuk started it. And I, what it will confuse me is that Emily's said that she's been in therapy lately and she's been trying to like work out various situations and like deal with toxic people in her life and trying to like sort out the toxic people. I'm like, and so then that drove you to a camera.
Starting point is 00:43:10 I don't understand how this works. Yeah, it's like you literally walked into the Britney Spears song. You were on airplane as we speak in a costume. So they talk about what a bitch-cratchin is then Tamra's like, Oh, yeah, thirdary Fibrillation. Be hard about heart heart heart heart. Um, and then they show Eddie at home recovering. And he's in like this little guest room double bed. Be stuck over there, Eddie. Yeah. Okay. We feel for you from afar. I'm? Lovely film cast with mattress. Good with crap ends.
Starting point is 00:43:47 So then after the commercial break, we then go to Emily at home. And now she is officially a housewife because she gets the title. Emily. So she's at home, and which I'm fairly certain her house is either Tamer's old house or Lizzie's old house because it is like like all these houses basically And so she's got three kids one is named Annabelle. Oh Annabelle And she's like she's like yeah, I don't know what the deals with Annabelle She's like we call her a feral child in the woods and we just see this little girl like swinging a stick
Starting point is 00:44:20 yard She's swinging a stick at a tree She's like a stick at a tree. She's like, damn that tree. And then she's got these little cute twin boys who are always fucking with her. Yeah. And she's like, I'm from a poor town, but I'm appreciative of where I come from. I'm not sure how she talks yet, but we'll fill it out. Yeah, we'll ask. We should give her that voice for now. I want a good life. You know, I've always wanted a good life for myself,
Starting point is 00:44:46 from better life for myself, and so I made good choices. Yay me! And then we see her husband Ryan, or her, he looks like old Ryan to me. That's what I love. He just looks like old Ryan. He always exhausted.
Starting point is 00:44:59 He's like, hi. She's like, I'm a Ohio. So they're both attorneys, and apparently they went to law school together and they were like really good friends and they were chatting on G chat and he was like, you want to get married? And that's what they got married. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:45:16 It's not romantic at all. I was like, it's really not. And she goes, hey, honey, you want to drink? And he's like, I'll just have juice. And he sits there sipping his orange juice over dinner. It's just weird. This is some odd casting. And I'm already love. I'm already saying good job. Yeah. Vic is like, oh, see, this is a merit that's gonna work. Did you see? They must be having a rough type of their marriage. I like that she's from
Starting point is 00:45:40 middle town, Ohio. For some reason, she seems exactly like someone who'd be from a place called middle town, you know? You know, by the way, fun family in the middle town. The first girl I ever went on a date with in sleep away camp. We were like boyfriend girlfriend for like three days. Her name was Kate and she's from Centralville, Ohio. So I like that Ohio has both a Centralville and a middle town.
Starting point is 00:46:04 So I'm in the middle. I'm in the middle. Hi, my name is Ronnie and I'm from kind of Ville, Ohio. I'm from Equadistant Ohio. I'm after this I've been not completely middle. I'm from a skew Ohio. A skew Ohio. I'm from Protractorville, Ohio. I make this
Starting point is 00:46:25 Oracle. I'm from a squared plus b squared equals c squared. Ohio. So they're looking for Keller and it's just them going, Keller, Keller, Keller, Keller, Keller. And they can't find them. It's all over. This kid is one of those kids that's gonna get kidnapped because he cries wolf too much But he really does Nothing happened he was sitting on the couch. It was their dumb fault They're like there you are on the couch. He's like So that was Emily's big moment. That was her big scene. So now we go to Shannon. I was gonna do some of my kids hide from me. Huh.
Starting point is 00:47:06 It's now we go to Shannon and all we hear is like, oh my goodness, a gracious Archie. Really? Archie? Ah! Ah! Archie! Come on, Archie. Ah, come on! Oh, Archie, all over. Huh. It's like a bunch of little vikis in the backyard. Huh, still bitter. Still bitter. Huh? It's like a bunch of little vikis in the backyard. Huh? Still bitter. Still bitter.
Starting point is 00:47:28 Shannon is the housewife that waits for the camera crew to show up to pick up the dog poop for an entire week. Well, the camera's crew here. The camera crew is here. What should I do? Something glamour. I'll go pick up a week's worth of dog poop. Ertsy, what are you waiting? Jesus. Well, I wish you'd come visit the woman downstairs for me, that would help. That dog poop filled balcony. Get a camera crew, maybe she'll start doing it. I know. Wow, well, you have a lot of dog poop out of your lady, and you're playing your drink really loudly.
Starting point is 00:48:00 Ah! Until four in the morning. So anyway, so Tamara comes over and she's like, she's like, so you're gonna get money for the new house from the divorce, you're gonna get a new house and get, yeah, got a new house that looks just like mine and just like, I'm like, house, we could be house ones. I don't know, you gotta roll the dice in this divorce. Yeah, you guys need to get this divorce finalized and not keep it caught up with lawyers and fighting so that you can get some money Because you need some money for these you know, you got to get money out of that divorce
Starting point is 00:48:32 Yeah, Timmer's like I mean how else are you gonna pay if you play a piano? That's the answer to that doesn't play itself back Although it actually does play it self-factually. Although it actually does. So Tamra grabs her ring finger. She grabs Santa's ring finger. Look, I care about her, but it's time to move on. Send a paper move on Shannon. She's like, oh, I just made some of these errors. And then you find out less than three months later, he's with somewhat I don't
Starting point is 00:49:02 know if it's. I heard a thing you get here in terms of oh my god Jesus Christ get right of her Well, she goes he's been commenting on her she's been commenting on her post No, which is no So this is what Shannon goes huh? So you know, you know, I've been married someone for 17 years and then three months have to relationship is over He's with his with another woman. I mean, it's what the hardest things you can hear in Tamra's like, yeah, and he's been commenting on her post in October. It's like thanks Tamra. Oh, why?
Starting point is 00:49:32 And here I guess I thought it was only three months. It was negative 35 days. I guess, since our marriage ended. And she tells us, of course, I stalked them and I thought that they were communicating Possibly all the way to when they were still married She's like I don't you know, I don't I don't know what it doesn't matter. I don't care You know, it's over. It doesn't matter who good he was he was She goes yeah, I've been sick of it calling you about it just sick I've been sick of it. Look then why don't you call her you waited for the fucking camera crew Tamara Jesus Yeah, I mean I kept that you guys are on a TV show and I should be saying thank you, but that's just so mean. I almost had to go to the hospital to get a procedure done because
Starting point is 00:50:13 that's sick of it. I'm like, I was in trouble. I was gonna make it. I was in shock. I was shocked. This is about me, okay? Different later. Now listen, this ring doesn't just represent David. It represents me being a wife and a mother. Tonight where the ring means that I do not have my family together anymore to the cute sounds they get off. This ring represents being a wife. A represents being a mother. It represents having a family.
Starting point is 00:50:41 Having a chandelier that would go up and down. Having enough potatoes to make the mashed potatoes, having more than two goddamn bottles of wine for a dinner party, David. David, David, all right. All right, fine, I will take off the ring, but I will not delete the Bluetooth chandelier lowering out from my iPhone.
Starting point is 00:50:59 I won't do it. I, I, I'll never take it off the ring, except for when I was pregnant, my fingers were too fat. It was like, Vicki was causing me stress before I even met her. I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I- just like our marriage ups and downs ups and downs It's making the new Shannon insane inside the house So they take off her ring with some dish soap and Shannon's like I'm gonna die And a lot of finger drama this episode. Yeah, I won't come off And then it comes up Aaaaah! Aaaaah! Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Happy I'm so happy. Ha! Ha! Look how happy I am. I'm fully happy. I've moved forward.
Starting point is 00:52:07 I'm moving forward. I don't care. So now how many comments did you write on that Instagram page again? So Kelly and Vicki and Tamara, who is in double French brides today, are going to this ropes course, and they're waiting for Shannon. And then Shannon arrives, and she's in this bike helmet yeah a little heart I'm like ha ha look at me someone said rope climbing you want to go rope climbing
Starting point is 00:52:32 gangster so they all pile into Kelly's car and they drive they drive off to this ropes course and Kelly starts talking about a date and she's like, wow isn't that interesting? Every time I call you, you say, I don't want to go on dates, I don't go on dates, I don't go on dates, and I run a date, I mean, what am I supposed to do? He's like, oh, she goes that date. She goes that date, trust me, she's been going around like a record. She's like, I have not said, well, the milkman I did, the milkman I did.
Starting point is 00:53:04 The milkman went on date with me. I didn't go on a milk... I didn't go on date with her. He went on date with me. He went on date with me. Who? Who? You? No.
Starting point is 00:53:15 No. Look about you, you've been having a lot of sex. What are you talking about? Not a lot. Not a lot. What's a lot? Well, for me. When? That would be a lot. I a lot well for me when
Starting point is 00:53:34 So they get to the ropes course and it looks like a torture Yeah, it looks like like a medieval bastion Yeah, and then the activity guys like hello, I'm activity guy. The Rob Scorsors about making commitment and trusting people really knows kind of about climbing ropes. I don't really see how this is dressed. But I use to trust the paper, but not I don't. I'm ruined. I'm hurt. I'm hurt. I'm like, you're about to have everybody in town over and trying to ruin their lives. I realize I really don't trust people. Oh, okay. Okay, Tamara. Yeah, exactly.
Starting point is 00:54:09 Then Vicki is like, well, I was, I was, I was, I was, I'm always trusting because I was raised. I was trust people, but then I get burned. And now I'm not sure if I can trust anymore. I don't know who burned me specifically, but her name runs with Amritay. So, like, Amritay and own and Shay. Is that pic that bloody pic broadcast still coming out at some point? Hey, I brought some leftover bottles from Wines by Wives. Here, Tasty.
Starting point is 00:54:35 And Tamron Shannon are looking at each other like, Hooray! Trag! I'm keepin' on, I'm keepin' on, I'm keepin my mouth shut. The producers off camera doing that thing, like the Sage Mom thing, like smile, smile. Don't fight till at least episode six. We've got new people to torture.
Starting point is 00:54:56 Smile. So he's like, you know what, I trust Tamra. I mean, she's a little quirky and a relationship's been a little weird and you know, I don't like everything she's done in the past. It's got to tam weird and you know I don't like everything she's done in the past it is kind of I'm right in Ireland going Fuck you
Starting point is 00:55:13 Trusted I trust you you know who that trust She falls on the ground She just like Bounce she's trying to put on her harness and she like puts her foot on the strap and this is her balance and like bounces off a picnic table on Like ten times in a row He'll push me he'll push me that guy push me in time I think it's all that's a My
Starting point is 00:55:37 And then we get a montage of Vicky falling like Vicky gumbels. It's a Thousand meaning professionaler. Oh my god. Yeah. Oh god. So now it's time to get on to that ropes course. So they're like, first up is our Shannon and Keller. The first two of them. And they have to climb up. They have to climb like a rope netting thing. And they're like, use your core.
Starting point is 00:55:58 I don't have a core. I have no core. My core was David and he's left me now. I have no core. My core was David and he's left me now My color is now commenting on Instagram post from what we're married Oh real nice real nice making me do a race like the many races David took instead of being home with me a work at our marriage And uh now they have to go over the balance beam and she's like, fuck me! Kelly is watching them from below and she's like, as a scary, fuck you! Oh, come on, Shannon, you gotta prove this, you gotta prove to everyone, you can do this. I don't need to prove this to anyone, I'm good. I'm wrong, David. I
Starting point is 00:56:46 have done it. Kelly's like this is a good thing for your daughters to see. It won't be a good thing. My daughter to see a lesson on how not to break their iPhones. Yeah, I want you to you to send this to sell and watch her mommy and all these great heights and keeping her phone in her pocket So then Vicki gets up on the chorus and then she's she of course is also like crying and screaming and her emotional response was I want to go to work and sell in Sharon Come on don't look down batch was step at a time just a conversation BITCH!
Starting point is 00:57:28 Step on the cable Vicki, step on the cable, on the cable, on the, on the goddamn cable Vicki? Vicki if you don't want to, oh god Vicki? Ladies you're on group! Oh guys I'm stuck! Shannon knows my hands! My back figure is caught! My figure is caught! I think I don't know what to do! I don't know! I didn't know! I didn't mean to do it! It's just like full history over this finger situation.
Starting point is 00:58:00 And then they're finally all up there together. And Vicky's like, First my finger now it's getting with the is getting with the kill is it are you fucking kidding me it's a god damn tornado they're free out there's a gust of wind oh my god oh my god I'm seeing the pearly gates of heaven it's all happening oh wait David just close him to go inside with another one so they close the I was I know so they close the I was gonna say so they close the gates
Starting point is 00:58:30 Sam is like sitting on this big platform towards the end of the thing and Kelly's like Posture off camera Yeah, she's like what if I die? Tell my kids I love him. Hey look, there's a cow flying in the air. Yeah, I'll tell David to go fuck himself, and then I'll tell you kids you love them, and then I'm going to kill that motherfucking Christa cow back. Oh.
Starting point is 00:58:52 So then they lay zip lines like that. Ah. David, David, I'm going to Instagram again as you don't have any new comments. I realize after doing this Robes course in Zipline, that I'm strong, and I can do whatever I'm doing with these girls because they have my back, and I've got a new finger.
Starting point is 00:59:16 Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! I got finger revenge. I'm back to normal. Ha! Ha! Yeah. So they all go down the other line and they hug and it's like, we are all friends again. Yes. And, uh, hello, well,
Starting point is 00:59:33 thank you, not which means that they're just, which means it could be time for them to go after the new people. Yeah, the new people are going to have a rough season.
Starting point is 00:59:40 Yeah, I think especially the second new person. I think she's going to get it really hard. Yeah. Yeah, because she's from one island. Yeah, and think especially the second new person. I think she's gonna get it really hard Yeah, yeah, because she's from one island and people they showed the preview of coming up on this season and And I like what is that an accent? Yeah, I'm everybody's clown Geez here we go But until then
Starting point is 01:00:00 We'll just have to enjoy these ladies Thank you all for listening. Tomorrow we got below deck, Ned, and then Thursday night. We'll have our New York recap up after the Philly show, and then same with Southern Toronto on Friday night. Go to watchcrapids.com to get tickets for those shows. Don't miss out. It's surprising how many people will be like,
Starting point is 01:00:22 oh my god, you guys just had a show? Yes, so don't be one of those people get that ticket now and you'll enjoy it and have so much fun because it's a part A A A A A A dude everybody we will see you in Philadelphia Philadelphia Thursday and Friday see you there hey prime members you can listen to watch our crap and add free on Amazon music download the Amazon music app today or you can listen to Watcher Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today.
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