Watch What Crappens - RHOC: The Olive Spar-den

Episode Date: September 26, 2018

It’s Italian Night on The Real Housewives of Orange County. What better time to inform someone they’re gonna rot in hell for eternity? On this week’s premium bonus, Ronnie is in Texas becoming a volleyball expert while Ben is at home in LA making his way through Game of Thrones. We also talk about The Crown and Netflix’ new show, Maniac. To hear it, become a member at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens **Our Limited HEY BETCH shirts are available through September at CrappensMerch.com **Crappens Live is coming to NYC, Seattle and Nashville in 2018! Get ticket links at watchwhatcrappens.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watch What Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chas, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch what crap ends would like to think it's premium sponsors! Christie Wowardy Dowardy! Kelly Barlow, when she goes Barlow, we go high-low.

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Watch what crap bins, watch what crap bins, who cares what happens when there's so much that crappens Appappens Appappens Appappens Appappens Appappens Appappens Watch what crappens Watch what crappens

Kids what Happens when there's so much that crappens Watch what crappens Watch what kids what Happens when there's so much that crappens Oh, I'm Ronnie. I'm also from the Roseprick Spatular podcast and over there has been. He's also from my heart. Oh, oh, hey greetings from your heart. It's so comfy in here. Little, you know, there's lots of plaque all over the wall. So you know, you can feel very proud in your room in my heart. But it's

very warm. It's very warm and comforting. You have and it's so big. It's so big and roomy in here. Big warm roomy heart. Ronnie. man. Everybody, welcome to Watch What Happens. Today is our HOC day. We're very excited. But first, we are going to be in New York in a couple of weeks. October 11th and 12th.

October 11th is Real Housewives of Dallas recap. And October 12th is sold out. But that's a Real Housewives of New York Classic recap. We'll announce which episode next week. And then in November, we are going to be in Seattle and in December, we're going to be in Nashville. We've got a special surprise coming in January and another special surprise coming in February, but we'll tell you this later.

So go get your tickets and also your head back t shirt over at watchwotcrapins.com. You can find links to our social, our merch, we can talk, we can hang. Yeah. You can find all that stuff over there. And today, we're going to be talking about some real housewives of the Orange County, okay? Yes, yes, ma'am. Oh my God, I was cracking up about this episode. I felt like this was like a through and through enjoyable episode.

Like I was sort of, I mean, I've been enjoying this season, but I felt like this was like a really strong episode and it made me feel like the show was like moving in the right direction and I, you know, I still has a ways to go, but I was like cracking up during this episode. Yeah, and I'm loving like just angry Shannon. I'm really loving this new like Shannon's doing this thing where she's like

I won't be young to a young person. I will just stay quiet over here and sip my drink with my eyes rolling behind You know, yeah, she's being all nice, but she's really getting more evil and that's what I really like watching Shannon getting Proterbed while Tamra is just trying to ruin everyone's life and Vicki's over there But sending everything's great with Steve while arranging for herself to fuck some all of Garden Chef. I mean, it's everything we live for in this show. Yeah, it was good to see classic Tamra back in action. She's no longer busing herself with baptisms

and like hating on Vicki, she's just like, let me get back to what I do best, which is spreading gossip about people and then all the sudden when like I'm in the spotlight, I say I just want to stay out of it. You know, that's like that's classic camera and we got a whole bunch of it today. Yeah, and there was also, you know, different parts of the opening make sense as the season goes on and we see what clips they're referencing and Vicki's, the FUB bus is leaving.

So, woohoo, I'm driving, I mean, the driver's seat. But we got to see that again, of course, because it's the FUB bus is leaving. So, woohoo, I'm driving. I'm at the driver's seat. But we got to see that again, of course, because it's the opening. But one of her examples of being on the fun bus was the saddest birthday party I've ever seen in the real housewives show, which was Steve's family's birthday party for Vicki at that Randall Mexican restaurant,

where she was trying so hard to pretend she was having fun. I know, all season long, I have been quietly chuckling every time the opening credits come on and they show Vicki and that sombrero like tilting her head left and right

like a little pendulum. You know, like I'm a I'm a D. P. Show in sombrero, you know, and so it's fun to finally source source that clip. Yeah. And it's like the saddest part ever. She's like trying so hard to have fun. She's like

the fun bus is sleeping. It's running over me. It's just messing with food restaurant. the fun bus is leaving. It's trying to go for me. It's just magic. It's good restaurant. The fun bus is left. Now just the mediocre not your my bus. Well, so we open up with a Tamara the doctor someone's in the doctor every episode this season.

Oh my god. It's like between this and Shazas. I feel like OC and Shazas sunset should just be relabelled as medical shows because there's always a doctor's visit in every single episode. And this doctor on here is so stupid, I'm wondering who he's supposed to be. Kelly was really turned on by him.

So it's like, is he supposed to come in and date Kelly? I'm not really sure what's going on, but he's very cast. And there's almost a girl sitting in the corner, like she in the Blair Witch Project or something when he's in the room, like it's really weird. What I like about this doctor is that if you put him in a little black bonnet, he could look like a villain from sense and sensibility, you know, like a gossipy aunt. Be like, oh, well, this is very nice of you. Have you spoken to Mr. Willoughby recently? He is getting kind of that gossipy woman face. Gossipy British ant face, you know,

like from the 1800s or 1700s. One was sense and sensibility. I think it was 1800s. He just looks like he is standing on the side of a ball staring at someone, a young heroine suspiciously, you know, ready plot plot a planned to foil her romance. Ankle and Incability Batch.

Ankle and Incability. My ankle wanted to roll up a hill and stare that found a mountain in it broke but it's in love with the mountain so confusing. Batch and Batch it is So she tells Kelly comes with her so So Tamra's like, but this book comes off and etiquette's a heart and order we're gonna bone like monkeys Do monkey's bone? Yeah, she goes bang like monkeys the monkey's bang. I'm like no, they just reproduce through like coughing out each other

Timmer is like it's a biology lessons. And I like that. And then I actually get the dumber with age It's like a like a rotten fruit. Oh I don't want to see Tamer and Eddie banging like monkeys. I feel like that's like involves feces Yeah, they're just throwing shit at each other's head. And like loud howls, like howler monkeys. Like I feel like if I were walking to the jungle and I heard monkeys banging, I'd be like,

ugh, get me out of here, which is pretty much what I'd expect Tamra and Eddie's sexual experiences to resonate like. Like something like that. It's like planet, planet of the apes, but you'd never really root for the apes. The movie wouldn't really work.

It's like what? Kill the apes. Kill them all. It's like a statue of liberties in their backyard. So then we see we start talking about how Kelly was spreading spreading it around all the girls that Steve Steve Chavez-Ludge is just using Vicki for money for you know Tortillas or whatever. He's very, very Hispanic.

Yeah. And Kelly's like, here's the fact with Steve Dump to her and we went to Cabo, she was hysterical. I was going to be like a good friend. Here's the fact, uh, with Steve dumped her and we went to Cabo, she was hysterical! I was consoling her like a good friend, and then she got him back, I have no idea, but he was living with his mom! I mean, she was really butt-hered about it, she was butt-hered, she was butt-hered! He was with his mom, he sold his house in Murietta, Murietta! But didn't he have two HSS? He's like, no!

So now they're like, wait a minute, where is Vicki like the home for runaway old people? Yeah, yeah, because Kelly's basically like, you know, Vicki has a pattern and like, guys always just move into her house. And like, that's probably because she has a nicer house with a grotto in the back, as opposed to Steve Steve who probably has like a one bedroom above an economy watch. Yeah, Maria.

It doesn't work on this show. Okay. Yeah, Maria. Yeah, Maria is not Bravo. The Bravo brand. Okay. I'm sorry. Aconda and Tuston just does not fly with us.

Yeah, Vicki's very Vicki. Vicki's very controlling. She's not going to just be like, okay, I'll be with you. No way. Are you kidding? One of the biggest fights she ever had with Don was over throw pillows. Okay. Well, she also probably she probably sees her house as being part of like Bravo history, right? Like so she feels like she probably can't even give it up because it's in Kodo and that's where it all began. So she probably just makes everyone move in with her plus also their poor. That's where Lincoln was shot over there. It's historical.

No, not Abraham Lincoln. The old Lincoln I had it. We just died. It was shot. Lincoln continental. Yeah. It's in the walls now. Hey Lincoln. Be beat. Who who beep? B.B. Who B.B. She gets the call from the mechanic. No, I'll make it. So Kelly's like, I doctor. Like Kelly's like all in love with the doctor and he's like, guess what? Too much motion is what we are trying to avoid robotic hot doctor from sense and sensibility. Without his bonnet on

So basically the big news is that in two weeks Tamra can transition into a flat shoe So then Tamra's like, oh, that's really sucks for a sex life, which we have every I mentioned a sex life We're gonna bang like monkeys because that's all we like doing sex sex sex. Oh, we do a sex everyone like okay, Tamra We get it. Yeah, Timer, you're banging. It sounds like totally the confident, like a woman who's banging. Yeah, good. Can I take my butt in the back, Timer? Like okay, just go through that again.

So Gina, I better condom my butt. When I say I'm gonna stick a butt up your ass, I'm not kidding, at least. So Gina goes to some farm with Emily. Yeah, she's like, when I moved to Orange County, I was having to time in my life. I hit every playground. It was a winter back in New York.

I'm like, you are so sad right now, that you had the time of your life because you got to go to multiple playgrounds. Like honestly, Gina, it's time to spread your wings and just go anywhere with them. Like, go to auto zone. I don't care. Go to O'Reilly's, go to Chili's. I don't care. But if going to multiple playgrounds in the winter is like your version of like living your best life, you have to revive some things. Yeah. You want to know what a real vacation feels like, send those kids

to their dads. Okay, give him full custody. That'll show you a vacation. Yeah, exactly. So Gina and Emily, they're at this little farm, Tanaka farms, and they like hop into a wagon with these, but they're kids because they're gonna go on a little tractor ride. And they all get like, the farmer gives them carrots and Emily's like, oh, oh, oh, hold on.

I mean, like, you have to watch a prolonged scene of her like plucking a carrot like out of her throat that had like a string on it. I'm like, Emily, do you know how to chew? What is going on? How did you get that big chunky carrot on there with a stem still attached? Like, we're just gonna swallow it whole? She sells that person that you say oh use a carrot on a stick and then she literally eats the carrot in the stick She's like oh

No stick oh Oh, it was a stick don't worry everybody it was just a big stick So they go on this tractor ride and they start talking about So they go on this tractor ride and they start talking about, they're talking about like the dinner that they had the night before with Shannon and Tamra and Emily's like, I'm just waiting for Shannon to come out of her shell. I'm like, Shannon is like the most raw housewife we've ever seen. She is so not in a shell. I don't understand what she's talking about.

She's like a, she's like constantly freshly molded, you know Just get out of her skin I've lost point oh three pounds cuz I just shed my skin again Fortunately the new skin smells like nacho cheese and two three pounds heavier than the old skin 40 to 15 negative skins on me. So you're like Shana Badoor skin, molded by David. Yeah, Shana's my initial. She just doesn't like you. Okay. She's very off the shell about that. Yeah, I feel like she's off the

show. She is fully like like she is open-shelled about that. She is a full on open scallop, you know, her hatred does not mean she's in a shell. She just has like open shell hatred towards you. Yeah, open-shelled hatred. So Gina's like, I just have a lot of opinion. That's a walk. I'm from a different place. In that place we got opinions.

I'm like, the one county with justification trust me, but still nobody got an opinion about that It's like oh geez this girl is like a broken record She just keeps saying the same shit over and over again and also Then the tractor they're writing a tractor which okay should be my ear then the guys like okay Now you've had to care it now we get strawberries just fucking take a break and just start beating me in the face until I'm dead, okay? Take the softest most Garden tool and just kill me with it. Okay, why why why are you so bad? I'm watching people go around in the tractor eating fresh things out of the ground. I want a house. Why I've seen get the hell out of the farm. Oh

Listen, you're the one who is like all like like Listen, you're the one who is like all like like like like vegetarian now. I thought you should be happy by this. There you go. I'm based diet. It's taken me one week with carrots and now everybody needs to die around me. Okay. I'm going to start talking about the animals with my hands just because I'm getting so angry on my diet. I was actually happier to see them in at a little farm as opposed to like sitting at another like ridiculous, like coffee shop in a strip mall called something like, you know, coffee and me, something ridiculous.

Like here we serve coffee and cheesecake and also dream catchers. I'm like, what, that's so O.C. So, so yes, so Gina's complaining about Shand, she's like, Shand of a Dua is not nice to me. She's cold She's like a pull of vortex. She's big pull of vortex and I guarantee Come reunion time Shannesh, but well apparently I'm cold. Apparently I'm a pull of vortex. Huh? A low pressure system living in from the North. I guess that's what I am. Ah

She's gonna remember that pull Apparently I'm a puller rare. Okay. Yeah. Well, hey, did anyone see the train? I guess I was expecting the puller expressed it come through on account of my vortex. Yeah.

So then I have nothing to say about polar. Isn't that sad? I'm sitting here rocking my brain. I'm like, there's nothing else to say about my car. Well, I guess I'm the puller vortex. So no one seems to care that I'm sitting here racking my brain. I'm like there's nothing else to say that I'm a virus. Well, I guess I'm the polar vortex. Oh no one seems to care That I'm melting away because of climate change, Gina. So It doesn't make sense polar vortex is a weather. I'm a polar dancer apparently well

I guess I'm Canadian now coming in from Canada with my cold-fast year, huh? So, good day, A. So, Gina though, I actually do think Gina has a point because anytime Gina says something, you know, she's like, it's an opinion and they're like, shut up Gina. But then everyone does have something to say about her marriage. I think the difference is that Gina delivers her opinion in a very brash, annoying way, which was why it rubs people the wrong way. I just worked through my own issue.

I just think that Gina just won't shut up about it. It's like every time she's on screen, every time she sees one of these girls, it's the same exact thing. It's like pushing a button in her and she's like,, I mean, Matt with like friends like with best friends anyone who knows us knows that with best friends But it's like it's just not this just not together and I feel like maybe there's other things that we should be doing You know, it's just not like marriage, but with best friends, but like it's gonna be fine So she sounds like she's trying to convince herself, but she also just won't give them anything else to talk about. You know, true. She also delivers her. Yeah, sorry.

I interrupted. No. And then when she delivers her opinions, like, you were going to say, well, I don't know what you were going to say, but when she delivers her opinion, she's totally bitchy about it. She is. That's all I was pretty much going to say, which is that, like, if she had an opinion about me drinking Diet Coke,

she would say, I would never do that. You're going to do that. I would gonna do that, like I would never. You know what I would do instead? I would throw myself off a bridge before I had that Diet Coke. I would never, you know, which is like, it's not an opinion, it's an opinion, but it's also an opinion and making you feel shitty about it

as opposed to being like, oh, Diet Coke, you know, that's not really my thing. You know, I just don't really like Diet Coke, it's not weird. Yeah, it's opposed to like, that wouldn't make me feel shitty. I'd be like, oh, know, that's not really my thing. You know, I just don't really like Diacoc, isn't that weird? Yeah, it's supposed to like, that wouldn't make me feel shitty. I'd be like, oh, okay, that's where you stand on Diacoc, fine. Yeah.

Well, of course, I'm on her side of this scene, but leave it to Vicki to just... I'm on the side of the entire time, by the way. But leave it up to Vicki. Well, I'm on, I've been kind of annoyed with her talking about it, but leave it up to Vicki to get me on, you know, the side of the person who's making me the craziest

at the moment. Like Vicki just has that knack. What can I say? I know. Well, what really, what really annoyed, well, I can say, well, I'm sorry, I'm really annoyed. It was at the end of the scene, Gina's son is like, Mommy, I have to pee. She's like, okay, we'll get you potty. She's like, I have to pee right now. And she goes, no, all the people go into the strawberries, which is like, so if there were no strawberries there, you just let them drop trial and pee right there in public. Like get it together. It's not acceptable. Not acceptable. No, it's just like, yeah, it's like it's potty. It's like, it's just, it's gonna be potty and that's that. Like go to the strawberries are grown in poop. Well, you know, I hate strawberries. So I mean, you're out of this whole, you're out of all of this. You would never taste the

pee anyway, because you don't even need strawberries. So now we go to a fantastical wine shop in the Orange County called a Hidden Vine on the Lake, which is like really over the top for where they went up going. So it's Vicki and Tamra, they're at a wine shop, they're there to do a tasting because Vicki ran into her old friend, Domenico, at the mall and he's like wants to cook them dinners, they're going to get some wine for dinner. They're banging, let me think, current Domenico. Bang and currently banging, like, bang last night banging. I don't know, I don't think so. I actually don't think so. I think so.

Yeah, because her face, you know, Vicki's got like something going on with her face. She gets those like, the season's about to shoot. I'm gonna get feathers at Botox today, you know? So she has that look on her face. So she can't really smile her laugh too much because she really does look like I'm trying to think what she looks like like.

It's like a basketball and a hurricane when she starts laughing, you know, it's just like a basketball flying in a cone. So she looks like and so she was laughing so hard whenever she talked about Dominican. I was like, I know that like she's even going past the strength of her Botox level right now to like flirt. But do you think Dominico would be into Vicki? I think Dominico would be into a slice of ham, honestly. I just, that took me a moment because I did just have a ham, I can cheese right before this podcast.

So just as they're imagining Dominico, like banging my breakfast sandwich. Dominico would stick his dick into a Coke can. Basically, like Dominico will fuck anything, I think. Yeah. I think that's probably what we're supposed to be getting from Dominico. And he's like, I'm a dad. I'm like, you're a whore. You're just a whore. Just say that. Okay. Which is fine. You know, fuck a Coke can. What do I care? Yeah. Fuck us. Ice of ham. Go ahead. I'm proud of you. I just want to watch. Feels delightful. Yeah. Yeah. So, um, so, yeah. So, uh, so, uh, so Vicki and Tamra are like at this wine bar and Vicki's, uh, telling Tamra that she and Steve are gonna be

are looking at houses in the desert to buy and she's like, we're so happy together. Let's so, so happy together. I'm like, hmm. I don't know. Not a lot of, not a lot. I mean, let's just like go back to that birthday party, you know, like that's not, that's not what Vicki wants for her birthday. Yeah, Vicki pouring out tequila so she can talk to the weirdo mom. Nope, that's not what Vicki wants, okay.

And then Vicki's like, we're so happy, we're so happy, like he wants to be all the type and I want him all the type. Oh, I'm overly loving on him. You know how I get, because I'm like, do you really feel like that? If happy. Like, he wants me all the time and I want him all the time. Oh, I'm overly loving on him. You know how I get, because I'm like, too many people like that. If he's like, I do, I do, I do. You know, I was just so happy.

And Tamer's like, she's just like over there, like, listening, like that's the sound of how Gasp Tamer, like, gives a dirty look. She's like, she's just hissing. Yeah, she goes, she Tamer tells us, say the same, say the same, like the perfect she, Tamra tells us, save it seems, it saves him like the perfect guy, but said it Brooks. I'm like, you never said that Brooks was the perfect guy. I never even said that he seemed like the

perfect guy. You hated him immediately. He says, stop this bullshit. You can't gaslight us. Tamra Barney. God. Oh, when they're talking about Domenico, we see a clip of the first time they had Domenico seasons and seasons, faces and faces. It's 2007, yeah. You know, like 11 faces ago. 11 faces ago.

And Domenico was like, hey, what's kind of rusty like? And Vicky's like, double D's. Oh, shit, pop, pop, pop, shit, pop, pop. Like cracking up. And that's important for later. So Tamara is like, yeah, Brex seemed good. And then Kat Kat and she's like, well, it brex seemed good and then cat cappans. And she's like, well, I hope it doesn't take your money that Kale said.

And that you moved in with your mama. Yeah, she, Tamara literally just goes, is like, Kale said that Steve had to move in with his mama when he got broke up because he didn't have any money. I'm like, this is like full on tamer right here, just like, you know, she takes what Kelly said. She makes it sound even more ridiculous. She gossips to it directly to Vicki. It's good to have her back. Celebrity beef. You never know if you're just going to end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter

or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife. And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the hosts of Wonder E's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the buildup, why it happened, and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feud say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It snowballed into a

full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wondering Out. Yeah, welcome back to Satan, honey. So, he's like, well, he stayed with his mother, not his Bobby, because he's the mother, not a Bobby, okay?

And he's very honest about his fears. I'm very, very, oh, why don't I say he was very honest about his fears. Oh, oh, she said, well, we had a moment where we took a break because he was very, very honest about his fears. And I'm very, very, very busy, very, very, very busy. And you know, he just wants to spend time with me and, you know, I'm so busy. And then they show Vicki being busy. And it's like moving furniture. This is random like busy flashbacks.

He grins like, all right. And you just stapler. Okay. Paper clips. Where are the paper clips? Oh my god. I'll get a clip. This is paper clips, which is better.

I don't know. It's a busy. So many paper clips, which is better. I don't know 70 dead birds dead birds everywhere. I can't get I can't get to see too many dead birds Little blue tooth locking around the office and I also liked on biggie's reaction as well to the Scott So which is it? Steve Steve has some money than I do Steve is so rich. He has so much money He's so handsome. We have so much chemistry and he has so much money. These are all three things. They're so literally so beyond truth.

I mean, how can you even say anything? I mean, it's hilarious. All that sweet sheriff money, and that sweet, sweet sheriff money that comes, it comes raining down. Yeah. So Vicky is based. So Vicky is like, Kelly doesn't know what the fact is.

She needs to show her that ass math, which I also feel like is about like, I don't remember. Did she did Vicky told us that because if she told that to Tamra, no, she told it to Tamra. Oh, she did it. Yeah, she's like, I'm pissed about it. She's sort of fat assed mouth. She's about to run business and Tamra is like, well, she's upset because of what Steve said, because Steve left Canada. She said that Kelly was doing the thing

and the thing that somebody else said about the somebody else. She said something else about that. They started going into that narrative. And this show is going to really just fuck all of our brains because it's like the most of my new things they're fighting about and they're just going in circles about them over and over again. So this begins that habit in this episode.

Yeah, well, this is like, this is where things get a little fucked up because, you know, Kelly is mad because Steve said in page six that Kelly left Michael and Kelly is claiming that it was a mutual decision and Vicki is like, no, Michael wants to stay married. He wants to stay married.

She was always yelling at him. She treated him terribly. I'm like, you know, that's really fucked up because over the past three seasons, we saw Kelly was miserable. She talked about how controlling Michael was. You know, she tried to leave him and he like, basically wouldn't allow her to leave. And she told all this stuff to Vicki and, you know, she tried to leave him and he like basically wouldn't allow her to leave. And she told all this stuff to Vicki. And, you know, Vicki understood that. And so now for Vicki to turn it around and be like, oh, well, Kelly was always yelling at him. Kelly

was always so nasty to him as if Michael's the victim. I thought that was really fucked up because I always got the impression that Kelly was the one who was really stuck in that marriage. And she started snapping at Michael at the end because she just couldn't stand him anymore. Well, they are really like, they were really like that volatile. They fought over every little thing at all times. And it's really hard to pick sides on this show because Kelly's actively trying to ruin Vicki's relationship right now. So Vicki's watching out and trying to like, deserve it. But it is, but it is like a classic behavior. And we've seen it on many of these housewives shows where there is like a controlling behavior and we've seen it on many of these house I've shows where there is like a controlling husband and then the wife finally leads him and then

he starts to paint himself as a victim like I was always in love with her. I was always trying to make it work. I was just trying to be the best that I could be. I mean, hello, Peter Bailey. I mean, he's not, I wouldn't say that he's controlling necessarily, but he sucked. And that's just like the classic thing, when someone whose sucks gets dumped, they're like, I would have tried to make a work. I was trying my best, but I guess she just moved on.

She was yelling at me, and I was willing to take it because I loved her. Now shut the fuck up. Don't play us like that. Yeah. Well, Michael and Kelly, that's like one marriage. Like, well, you're both pretty fucked up. And also, Kelly just betrayed Vicki by saying, well, last year Steve left her and had to go

stay in his mommy's house. So it's like, this is one where it's really hard to pick a side because they're both doing it. Yeah. I will say that Kelly started it, but that's, you know, you know, I mean, it's a real housewives of Orange County. And one thing you can, like, bet on is that they're all wrong at all times. Yeah. So, either way, Tamara now starts talking about the dinner that she had with Shannon

and Gina and Emily. And basically they're talking about Gina getting into force. And he's like, I don't know. I don't know. You know, she's doing that like quick head shake thing. She's an asshole. Tamara's like,. The guy she told me about filing for divorce and we can go. It's totally gross. It's totally gross. How you gonna support your children? How you gonna support your children? It's totally gross. Griffs. Yeah. I don't like her flippin' out. It's too bad divorce.

I don't know. Why do you do that? And Tamer is like, yeah, I think it's weird. Like, they just want to get divorced. Like, why would they want to get divorced? I think there's something that's happening that we don't know about. I'm like, yeah, no shit Sherlock. It's called their lives.

And why would they ever... Why would Gina tell you you're like an awful person? Of course she's not going to tell you. And, well, I'm going to save my intestine for later on when they really get into it. But like... The fact that these women... They don't have any fair, basically. And Tamers like, yeah, I'm calling both bullshit.

And because like... I don't like to flip of attitude about marriage What are these kids the attitudes about marriage? Yeah, like you're wanted to talk I mean they and I mean tamer even says that like look like we are not wants to talk It's like the lymphoma experience lymphoma msticks So then Well, she hasn't you know she has an injected basketball into her face yet. So there's that you know baby steps Mickey Yeah basketball into her face yet. So there's that, you know, baby steps Mickey. Yeah, exactly.

So then the lady comes out with a wine called an Arneas or something like that. In terms of like, Oh, cheers to our anus. Our anus got it. It sounds like Arneas, our anus. Because that's where I love to have sex sometimes with Adi when we're bounding like my guys. Batch. I can't wait to get this boot off so I can film an NS again batch. And Vicky just goes, she would say that. And then Tamara doesn't taste like asshole. Wow, that's a reference to me calling it our anus. Get it. Get it. This wine company is so glad that they showed up to give them publicity. Oh, you heard it here on real housewives of Orange County. It doesn't taste like asshole. Okay, we'll see you for the wine tasting Sunday night. What were you saying before?

You obviously that doesn't that's like the nicest whatever. Oh, who knows who cares? Okay, so Kelly and Gina are exercising and they're doing the stairs, you know, like the heavy stairs and Gina's like, Oh my God, New Jersey, we don't got stairs like that. They got the fanciest ways to work out here. Yoga, hot yoga, pilates, stairs, jumping jacks, walking. Oh my God.

All right, this culture clash thing has end now, Gina. All right. Like this year, it's like, she like goes into the soup market. She's like, oh my god, they have the craziest things in California. You can get tomato soup. You can get cream of mushroom soup. You can get chicken soup. You can get chicken stock.

You can get chicken broth. You can get chicken noodle, chicken dumpling. Whoa. And California, the limestone limits are in different places. It's crazy. You can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't you can't get onions, that's all, just onions, but here it's like all different colored onions, like, whoa, it's crazy. If you guys are not going to believe what she talks about, she's like, oh my boy, I'm divorcing Matt, but we're best friends, so it's not like a real divorce, because we're like really still together, because we're friends, and you know, we just decided we're in a different place.

Oh my god. It's more like a marriage is ending rather than divorce, because we're still friends and we're still attracted to each other, but we don't want to be with each other anymore. And oh my god, these stairs go down. I've never seen stairs that go down like this. If you ever seen a staircase that's big before, this is crazy. California is the strangest staircases.

In Long Island, stairs are electrical. In Long Island, we just take escalators everywhere. Is that weird? Is that weird? Does not like escalators in Orange County? Like, have you guys learned about escalators yet? Like, this is staircase. Like, why? That's crazy. So then after the stair climbing, do you have anything to say about stair climbing? Well, just that I was really enamored with Kelly's crazy black leggings that had rainbows and clouds on them. Oh really? I love her shoes, her pink ribbon shoes. Look at that. Yeah. Okay, are we?

So once again, and Kelly again is like, what's weird? They're getting divorced. They're still living sex. That's weird. That's weird. Yeah. I don't think it's that weird to be honest. Maybe it's weird. The cast is acting like it's so weird. The guy lives in a different city.

I know why they why did they not notice this? They're like it's so strange. I mean they're friends. They get along. They're still attracting each other, but they're getting divorced. He doesn't help with the kids. He doesn't do jack shit to help out because he's living somewhere else so she can be on TV with her kids. Oh yeah, it seems totally healthy. You know, she wasn't getting it before. They'd spent the whole time saying, Oh my God, I don't think he's good for you. He's probably cheating on you. He's never home. You should be doing. Yeah, they were doing that all season until now. It's like, it's to me, it's like really obvious what they're getting at getting a divorce,

because she's basically living like a single mom, but without any of the benefits of like being able to date or like screw around around and he doesn't even want to see her. So yeah, I think it's totally feasible that they are friends and they're attracted to each other, but this marriage is not going anywhere. Why is this hard to compete for these ladies? Yeah. So next up we get Vicki and Shephthomeniko.

Oh. I've done the Bidic up for 25 years. And he said, when I cook up for you, at the Euphreza, it's a party. It was really funny hearing Vicki doing an Italian accent. It was like strange. I didn't know how to process it. I'm sorry. I left that.

I'm sorry. I left that it's out of here, but I think you're so pretty. You know, then I got a paper towel. It was great. Okay, Dmitika, what are we making today? What are we making? Yeah, and Vicki, Vicki tell us a minute ago that Don didn't like her, like him, because he was too flirty, but whatever.

So now Shannon goes to pick up Kelly, and she checks out the apartment. Kelly's apartment. Huh, well, well, there he is. Huh, huh, well, I just shed some more skin skin and here I am a little bit later and well, huh, that's nice. That's right by the beach. I bet you have a great view of every time David walks by with that bitch, huh? A little biter, a little biter. So I suppose you call those stairs spiral, huh? Which is what my life is taking right now.

So that's great. Thanks for your hard work. It's so strange. So strange going up to your apartment because I've never gotten an upward spiral before. Oh, I just did. But oh, God coming down, coming down. Yeah. I do like that every time you lead your house, you have to go into downward spiral.

I feel like that really binds us. So then we skip over to Gina's house, which this is basically the going to downward spiral. I feel like that really binds us. So then we skip over to Gina's house, which this is basically the entire scene. I know little monsters. On the bread low. Oh God, it's a nightmare in that house. So then are we saying in Emily? Oh, yeah.

So Emily is getting ready and she's like, well, I'm all. And he's like, what? I wasn't invited to the party. King of snorkels. Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na. Snark as a And she's like what do you want to go and he's like no And she's like well, I sure you I'm sure you want to avoid conflict with other girls. And he's like, we're sick, not a girl. Get a snorkels and keep on.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Mm. She's like, well, I talked to, I talked to Kelly. And she doesn't want things to be awkward. So you guys can start over. You guys can really start over if you want to Shame He's like well the well the way to avoid awkwardness. It's like not called people by memes and yell

I'm watching a pilot guys with every evening. I've been more than happy to end. I'm so happy to end. I'm so happy to end. The kids are doing the wave in the back. Hey. Oh. He's such a shithead. Hey, oh. He's such a shit. Yeah.

I'm not handsome. Okay. So he'll think I'm going to ask Kelly to apologize, but I'm afraid she's fucking terrifying. Yeah. Well, she is. She gets she I'm I'm happy that we're on her good side. Um, but I would be very nervous to be on her pants. So, Vicki, before the women come over,

Vicki starts telling Domenico who he can flirt with. She's like putting check marks by all the single ladies, et cetera. And she gives herself an X and a question mark because she's taken, but she's not married. AKA, he gets the fact that he's not married yet. And all of a bit, my heart goes better, but she's not married, aka, you can sit back in here. I'm not married yet. And all of a bit, my heart goes,

Peter Patter, every time he passes. I'm gonna get to Binnico in sure it's for people. She's, because you never, should Binnico can cook food, your heart, Peter Patter explode, you're dead. Like, what are you gonna do? He is all Madacati. So, that's like my second Madacati reference in like two days.

Madacati, Madacati, Madacati, what a fine Madacotti, a body body, because Manacotti. That's my favorite hip hop duo, Kachio, a Peppa. So the girls start arriving and she's like, head to the medical show how we danced earlier They're like doing that arm and arm like Irish like tap dancing Lord of the Dan

River some weird like River like River dance, but like Lord of the Lord of the Like the flies you know He's like hey, I learned this in Iceland. Look. So, um, Could you please stop flirting with me?

That's the sound of her face making that basketball in a tornado. Just crinkling up. Um, so everyone starts to arrive. Gina shows up in this crazy white hat and a big long red coat. In fact, they're all wearing crazy hats for this.

And I felt like, you know, Vicki was wearing like a green blazer. Gina was in this red and white thing and they were just making the worst version of the Italian flag possible. I was like, this is a disrespect to this fine country. And by fine country, I mean both Italy and America. What's with the fedoras that are way too small?

It's weird. It looks like little puppet hats. Maybe that, yeah, I don't know. It's, what's weird, because in New York, all the fedoras fit normally, but in California, they're like small. It's a strange thing. I've never seen anything like it before. And Gina could be lying about where she's from at this point. Like, I don't even know if I believe her because she says things like this. I love Italian food.

Past the puzzle. Pizza. La Gagne. Michael, wait a minute. Those are like the most obvious things ever. Yeah, exactly. And when your mom's mid name is Sansanido, I think you should be able to like dig a little deeper than pizza pie. But I love Shannon showing up because Shannon always has like some of Shannon's best moments are when she's approaching a doorway, you know, she's always is muttering something. This time she's like, oh, that's kind of chilly a little bit here right now. A little brisky brisky.

They're cold. Yeah. I'm not sure about like that much. I haven't been here for a long time. It's like clips and some most random clips do. They're showing some random shit. Brooks is in there. He's like, would you like?

He's like roses are red. Violets are purple. Would you like someone? Pull my finger on a fart. It's like, what is this someone pull my finger on a fart? So All the women are there and Emily pulls Kelly aside and it's like hey, I have a question So like you know how you and I had that really good conversation. I was wondering if like you and like Shane and cuz like oh yeah

Of course like you and like Shane and he's like oh yeah of course of course I'd love to apologize I'd love to say I'm sorry to that dick no he's a little bitch but he still deserves an apology that little bitch put him on my lap that little bitch a little door the door door door apology I love that well that's good because you know he's. And he's like Whittian's or Castigan's strong. You know. And Kelly goes, yeah, if he's a good Mormon, he'll forgive me. Kelly knows what a good Mormon is.

Yeah, exactly. And he's a good Mormon. And he's a good Mormon. And he's a good Mormon. And he's a good Mormon. And he's a good Mormon, he'll forgive me. He's got me know so the good Mormon is. Yeah, exactly. Good Mormon. Good Mormon. Now, cover your ankles and knees.

Good Mormon. Good Mormon. To you. To you. Go into hell, going to hell hell going to hell going to hell What is that song from again? I believe that is from singing in the rain. Oh Yeah, you're right. I knew that Debbie Reynolds makes everything okay even more Minism to two ignorant people Good Mormon good Mormon

Don't have as I sing in the shame I'm singing in the shame I'm singing in the shame what a sarcastic feeling to be singing in the shame That was that was my musical comedy Turn them into Craig from Southern charm. Oh, by the way Thomas Reffin will got arrested today I'm sure he won't get shit because this is you know the south or whatever and so he'll get some goddamn judge You went to kindergarten with but good for you and Catherine. Hope you're making your move over there Yeah, and the other thing as long as we're talking about southern charm for second I also saw Patricia posted on I think Instagram or Twitter It was a video of Reese Witherspoon with a lady and they both were like they basically were saying something to the fact that I think they're in Charleston and they're like, and her friend was like, my favorite show about Charleston is my, it's like Southern Charm. I guess, no, I'm sorry. What Reese Witherspoon was like, hey, what's your favorite show that takes place in Charleston? She's like Southern Charm and then Reese Witherspoon is like, it's my favorite show too.

So Reese Witherspoon is one of us. Oh my God, Reese, come on board. I'll send you a Geraldine pen. Just send me your phone number, your anniversary, spare key to your guest, cabin, in the back. I feel like we would have such a fun time with Reese Witherspoon. I feel like we would like the three of us would go and like she would invite us over to her lovely house

and then she'd like have like a big puffy couch and she'd be like oh my god let's like totally watch like season three of Southern Toronto be like sure and then she'd like put out like a spread because she's used to where there's spoons there's of course she has a spread but then she'd also have some like gourmet shit she's like I just bikies up at Jones on third they're really great and we'd be like awesome wow and then we feel shitty because like all we brought over is like a bottle of sprite you know you know speaking of her, yeah, that you're actually being very generous

and you're telling the best. Because that's like literally more than we've ever brought. But it's reminding me of the plane to Texas because someone in front of me was watching legally blonde. What a film. I mean, what a film. I knew all the lines in my head. I was watching.

Never seen it. Oh, oh my God. Don't tell Reese. We're just trying to become friends. Don't tell Reese. But I'm like, is right now she's doing butt clenches while she's doing a stair climber in her house listing to this and she's very upset. I'm sure. Well, but if it makes Reese feel any better, I am like, so completely obsessed with election. I've seen it probably like 20 times and I own it on VHS and digitally.

So like election to me That's this it's like okay, good. It's kind of like what Tracy flip well, no, it's not it's nothing like that Okay, watch legally blonde that's very good. It's a cool thing. Well, I mean, I would feel rude not watching our new friends One of our most successful movies. I know where you say okay. We'll see you Wednesday We'll see you're place for real house last Dallas. You're there. Oh my god. Don't put that fancy in my head because that like being able to watch Leanne lock in with Reese with her spoon would just be like, I'm dead. No, I don't think she would invite Leanne. No, no, no, I'm just saying that we would watch Leanne. She would never invite Leanne. Yeah, no offense. Anybody. Okay, but we're totally

classy. We're invited. We're invited. And then you'd become friends with a dog and then you and Reese would bond over that. And then I would feel sort of like, oh, I feel like an outsider now. You know, I love.

I love your own feelings. I've been up in every house. Yeah. You've already hurt your own feelings. I love it. Okay. So. So they start going over the checks and the checks and Tamer agrees with me.

She's like, I think she's bound them. So then Emily comes in and they're cutting because it's supposed to be a cooking class, but it's like the worst cooking class ever which really leaves me to believe that they found this guy's literally just ran into him at the mall and we're like, oh my god, you do what to teach us things. Like, he was literally working at the Pearson Fagoda and he's like, I'm a Natalya and I can teach you things.

And they're all just slicing things incorrectly and they chop up some mushrooms and they're sauteing them in a pan and he's like, this how you do it? This how you do it? He just starts flipping the mushrooms and he's like, it how you do it? This how you do it? She starts flipping the mushrooms and she's like, it's not an omelet, it's not an omelet. Like, oh my god, it's not an omelet, it's not an omelet. I'm like, listen, you're the one with a big metal spoon and trying to stir them in a non-stick pan.

So you have to be quiet right now. I don't even think I'm gonna say half shop tools. She's threatened to kill Peabas. A shut off camera. Okay, let that die. That's Tamra's thing. She's all over the Twitter, you know like a shout out them They used to have to kill somebody who cares hasn't Tamra threatened to kill somebody before how is she not a million times? I'm sure how is she not you tried to get somebody raped by your own son in your house? Okay, Tamra so keep it in Possibly. Wow.

So, so then Dominico's like making some pawn about chicken breast whatever, you know, like, well what's the size of chicken breast that we need, you know, a little callback? Is this the callback you were waiting for? Yeah, it's like, it's like cute the first time, but then it's like you, it's like when you go on the universal city tour walk more than once or the tour thing and you're like, oh my God, they tell this joke to everybody. I wasn't special

the first time. And I'm not special now. And then when you, I know what you're saying. And then when you make the joke, they, you see Shannon's face like, Oh, well, I, I never I can't believe you would even suggest something about breast. It's just rude for all divorces here. He's just rude, rude. divorces here he's just rude rude yeah then Shannon she goes uh winner winner chicken dinner I just said this David here my job this is this is how many calories in a day of it? I mean, Dominican. It's so hard. I see a man sitting in front of me I just go I just want to see David and is there a chandelier nearby? I'm a little warm

What else more calories a piece of ice-pork lettuce or prosciutto What has more calories? A piece of celery or a bowl of fettuccine alfredo? So, so Shannon pulls Tamra's eyes like, well, Kelly is pissed.

She's really pissed. Because apparently, Vicki called Kelly yesterday in the wake of Vicki's conversation with Tamra. Where Tamra told Vicky, Kelly, Kelly tell it's saying that Steve broke up, he went to live with his mom, so Vicky is mad at Kelly,

so Vicky called up Kelly and was like mad that Kelly's going around saying that Steve moved in with his mommy, you know? And then we have, oh yeah, then we have a flashback of Kelly. The reason why Shannon knows this is that we have a flashback of Kelly and the Garwa Shannon. And Kelly goes, Tamara, for Betem told me that.

I said, I said that for Betem, for Betem. Yeah. So all roads lead back to guess who? Tamara. So they're talking about it. And then Vicki walks in behind, but Tamara doesn't tell Kelly that she's right behind her, because that's so Tamara. And Vicki's like, well, yeah, so she comes up,

and Vicki's already going to me, and then mommy! Mommy! Tamara's like, ah, now. And then Vicki's right behind her. So Tamara's like, say, say, say, just like, I said he got a lot of that. I can't quite hear you. Kelly said, Lara said, Lara. I said, Oh, Vicky, I was saying that thing about mommy.

Like, you know, what I said about him living with his mommy and Vicky goes, well, I wish I could see my Bobby. Shut up, Vicky. You don't get to fight with your dead mother. Okay, your dead mother is not a prop sword. Put her away. Are you guys talking about my mom? Is she here? Hey, mom, I'm here. Oh, I forgot. I forgot she died. Nah. Yeah, that was it. It's like, let's respect your dead mother here and not use her as a weapon. Just let her rest in the walls. Okay, for Christ's sake. That was

classy, Vicki. I was like, it's been a few seasons, but she's like, Oh, here it is again. She's playing out her mom died. Yeah. I loved it. So Vicky tells us, which is totally true. She's like, Steven's in the way of our relationship. Kelly's in the way of our friendship. Okay. And if you want to bring drama, go somewhere else. I don't want drama. This dinner is sent to rent, tell you food and abuse the new young people who are trying to take her jobs. Yeah, pretty much because they sit down and Gina's like, wow, I learned a lot about cooking in my heritage actually. It turns out my great, great grandfather was a piece of spaghetti. You know what grandma or Cheta always said, well, you never knew because you couldn't even hear through her dimple, which is ironic because

or Chetan means little ears. So isn't it weird that you couldn't hear her even though she was an ear a self that's weird, right? Isn't that weird? Oh, don't believe her. She's not such an angel here. You know what though? She's just a big shell of a woman. Like literally, she's a shell. She's shells. You know, now that I'm single again. I'm considering setting to date rig. It told me again I mean what a hot guy well it all depends if you still dating ZD, you know, you know Yeah, I think he's like I'm a good ditter party. I'm a good ditter party everybody Okay, I don't want fight. I just want a good ditter party because that's what it's about. It's a good dinner party. And Kelly's like, well then why is Tamra talking shit?

I want my tamra talking shit. I was like, yes, a Kelly Tamra show down, bring it. Tamra needs to be put in her place. But I think they're gonna save that for later in the industry. Yeah, exactly. So while Vicki is literally patting Gina on the head, like, yeah, yeah, you did a little bit quiet stupid little girl

We then see Shannon the corner talking to waiter who's like serving food. She's like, hmm. Well, this is no point I'm for my diet, isn't it? Oh, so good to see you again, Alfredo God, Alfredo, you know, I'm so glad that they didn't fire you along with Heather do bro Monster of a human being. Gaslight me. Not the hospital. So now they start talking about Gina's divorce and and Vicki is like, well, you don't know what you're in for.

You know, there's, you know, there's no abuse, no doubt you had no pain, but it's still going to be crazy. You know, like, I don't understand why you're getting, I don't understand why you're getting divorced. I mean, it doesn't make any logical sense to me. I'm like, there are a lot of things that don't make logical sense gonna be crazy, you know? Like, I don't understand why you're getting, I don't understand why you're getting divorced. I mean, it doesn't make any logical sense to me. I'm like, there are a lot of things that don't make logical sense to Vicki, you know? Fashion.

Light switches. Ramps. Floor mats in the car. Paper mache. Deadly. or punches. Pime cones. Actually, I think that's a good one to end on Pime Cones. It's just a magic and Vicky like, wow, they do something so

bead. It literally hurts to pick these up. It's like literally not a cone. It's not a cone. Is that a pine tree? Like, why is it called a pine cone? So, um, Jean is like, I'm not feeling the mimic pain at all. literally not a cone. It's not a cone. It's not a pine tree. Like why is it called a pine cone? So, um, Gina's like, I'm not feeling any pain at all. She's like, you will be feeling paid. You're so much loud about it. What do you, what do you, what do you, what do you be so much loud about? It makes no sense. She goes, well, can't we, is women's structure, our lives have we want to? And Janne goes, no, it makes no sense. Zero sense. Zero. and he goes, no, it makes no sense, zero sense. Zero.

And Biggie starts talking you as if like, Gina is like about to like, like come down with Ebola or something. She's like, I don't want to know the statistic at Orange County. I don't want to know this that. I don't want it. I don't want it.

And then the music gets sent. The music gets so dramatic and they cut to this guitar player on the side. He just like turns. I'm like he's one of the stats Look at him He's like me Another stat I may be a guitar player, but I am also a stat King of statistics tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt tt t tt t tt t t t t t t You don't have to say what it is. The statistic is 80% I don't want you to be another statistic get married to shirts Get married to shirts, okay?

And then Kelly's like it's just a weird Listen, I know who I married and I know who he is and I know they were gonna be it's everything's be fine It's very different everything's be fine it's very different everything to be fine and shout well well well well well we all think that until it comes down to the financial part and next you know he's cursing what happened at court room huh huh huh well how'd you feel when Matt cornered you in a court room and started screaming at you in public and there was no one to help you how'd you feel about that how'd you feel when Matt started going off to spawn races and didn't write you anymore? How about that?

Ha ha! It's all fun and games until someone's eating a chip right in your face while they stare at you making quinoa! Ha ha! It's all fun and games until your ex-husband forces you to get onto a palaton machine! Ha! Oh, so... She is like... Oh, I want about the money for us.

I will give up Alamoni to save the family dynamic and he'll pay me double the Alamoni to save the family dynamic and that's sweet. What? And this is never an issue of money. And Shannon's like, you're assing you waiting. I'm saying it's all about the money. I didn't say that. You literally just said until it gets to the money, Shannon.

Okay. And I'm on Shannon's side through everything pretty much, even when she's totally ass and wrong. And right now she's ass and wrong. Okay. Just keep your mouse shut over there. It ain't about the money, money, money, it ain't about the price tag, price tag, price tag. Shannon, now you're just doing Jesse J. I ain't saying you're a gold ticker, but you're not you're not missing with any broke rigotony. I'll tell you that Because we are living in a material world and I'm not a material girl Kelly I'm sorry, I meant say Gina So then Gina you know starts her whole monologue again blah blah blah, you know

I don't know but she's like I don't know shit about you your relationship you don't share with me she and you know I don't know I don't know anything. Kelly starts when you say oh when you have assets it's a whole different ball game. You have assets. Mmm. That's a door. You're a door.

She's an asset. And everyone's like yelling. She's a good point But Gina's right. She doesn't have multiple assets. And she's actually taking that advice and getting out right when she starts to earn a lot of money on her own. Exactly. If she's a multi-season housewife, why would she want to spend half on him?

Right now, she gets out now. She can get out without paying him this money. She can get out with getting all in money and child support for the next 15 years or whatever it is. So financially, she's actually not making a terrible decision. And if she's going to be raising the kids alone anyway, except for the weekends, what's the difference people? Get off her ass.

Exactly. Exactly. And I think also something that's a little unspoken here is that clearly the show played a role in their divorce. You know, like he doesn't want to be on the show. His face is blurred out in the photos. Okay. So he doesn't want to have to be part of the show.

And she's like, listen, listen, Matt, it's my first big thing I want to do this, you know? So she wants to do the show. It's income for her, it's fame for her. He doesn't want to have any part of it. It was probably like the last straw that broke the camel's back. So like, you know, I don't see, I just don't see why these women are so worked up about it.

They're like, I feel like they're getting out at the right time. I think it's totally fair to be like, we just don't want to be married anymore. It's like not working. I think that's good. I think that's better for the kids than for the kids to be in a situation. I mean, hello, look at like Tamer's kids, okay? Or look at Vicki's kids are okay.

They're fine, but I'm just saying I'm just saying, kids get really damaged when they're in relationships that are messed up. Also, anybody around Vicki, I mean, my advice is just everybody get away from Vicki. Look at their succulents. Yeah, Mike can't close his eyes properly. They're still bugging that. He's terrified every time he sees her.

Brianna moved away and Vicki says that Brianna moved away because everybody gets divorced in Orange County, which is interesting. Brianna moved away and Vicki says that Brianna moved away because everybody gets divorced in in Orange County, which is interesting. I mean, he can fuck other people in Oklahoma too or wherever the fuck they move. Well, no, they're in North Carolina. They moved away because he probably could not stand. Well, I mean, Orange County is a pretty red county, like extremely consuming conservative, but he probably wants it to be more like in like more of a red state, you know, like he's cuz if you look at Ryan's Instagram it's all like guns guns guns are great, you know

So and he's also a dick and he's always hated Vicki and and the show and all that stuff and he's always wanted He's always wanted mom. I'm moving on. Yeah, she probably said mom I'm moving because I don't want to get divorced like Vicki took that is like oh my god Which caddy statistics were Ryan is like if we don't get away from her mother, I'm moving because I don't want to get divorced. Like Vicki took that is like, Oh my God, which cat is statistics? We're Ryan is like, if we don't get away from our mother, I'm fucking divorcing you. Okay. Yeah. Make up your mind.

So the now the best part about this entire argument for me is Vicki goes, Jenna, you took a vow in front of God, you took a vow in front of God. And she's like, well, I don't even believe in God. This is like, County, you can't say that. Another if you a stat, another if you a stat. So you know, it's like, I mean, I believe in a higher power. And Kelly goes, well, that's God. And she's like, well, I mean, I believe in a God.

And Kelly goes, that's God. And then Kelly, Kelly, the preacher, she's like, everything I've ever prayed for has been given to me because I believe in God These women okay, this is the attitude I grew up with and it makes me fucking crazy You know and I've told stories about my parents praying at the craps table Okay, and I'm not even kidding. It's like that is not what God is okay God is something different to everybody else and if that's what God is to you that's fine But the fact that you think that you're like sitting there

in our money and a little fedora and like a decent alimony because you prayed for it is just fucking ridiculous people, okay? Yeah, exactly. So Gina's like, well, I believe in myself. And because he's like, that's not enough. That's why you're in the place you're in. I'm like, she is in a great place actually.

She has realized that her relationship is not working out. So they're going to like split up before it gets too nasty and like live their happy lives and they're happy with their children. So like I don't really understand. Like I just like that. Mickey is like nagging. Gina is saying that she believes in herself. You can't believe in yourself. The first woman she's ever said don't believe in yourself. You know? Yeah. Now she's like, oh my god, what you want to get a job? No, stop believing you do stuff. Doke do job. Doke do job. Doke do job. It's like the opposite of Vicki. Hey, Vicki, you got some plank in your eye, bitch. Okay. And then Vicki, I love this. She goes, she

better hope she's right because if she's wrong, she's going to pay for it for eternity. It's a long time. Like I love them. Just like hell shaming her. Just a full on hell shaming her over her spaghetti. Well, here's the here's the alternative. Okay, you go to heaven and you hang out with Vicki or you go to hell and hang out with people more like yourself. Bye.

Why would I go to church? You know, if anything's going to ever turn me off from going to church, it's to act See you later. See you in hell So then then they hear as well. That's why you don't have a moral compass inside your soul Which is so nasty especially coming from Vicki. It's like hello Your compass. I don't know what's it tuned to but like it's it you're not you're not one to talk about Compasses, but we were sellingcandies and calling them cancer drugs

Like literally two years ago So she she literally has like a geometry compass. She's like, it's my model compass Like no, it's not the right kind of kind of compass. Okay. It's not what we're talking about Well, you know, that's why you don't have the borough protractor. You're going to get circles Okay, you're going to walkie circles without lead. You don't have moral angles. Okay Here's my proof. So, so everyone's like, Gina's like, whoa, that was really mean thing to say

that I don't have a moral compass, that's crazy. Just, no, no, I said, don't you have a moral compass? Don't you have a moral compass? Biggie. She literally said, that's why you don't have moral compass. She's around that. She's around that. She's around that. She's around that. She's around the asshole and then Gina goes, you know why?

No moral compass. You sound stupid. You sound stupid right now and I don't do stupid. Okay, that's stupid. Which is so good seeing someone throw that back in Vicky's face. And I hope that becomes the thing that they just play over and over throughout the years. Like they've played. She's upgraded.

Stupid. Yeah. Well, then you know, then say've played. She's not upgraded, she's stupid. Yeah, well, though then, you know, then says something stupid. She goes, you know what? You know what? I have morals and not because of God or because I follow some sort of rules. It's because I try to be a good person.

I'm like, well, I hate to break it to you, but morals are really based off of a code that's established by like God or rules or laws. So like you can't have morals without someone without someone without someone. I don't believe that. I actually don't believe that. And I hear that argument a lot.

I think that's incredibly short-sighted. I don't want to say stupid. But what people are just going to think it's okay to go murder each other just because there's no Bible. Like, I don't think that I think that basic human decency and laws, like could have kind of. I'm not saying it's irreligious. I'm just saying that like, there's their standards

that are creates the standards that are created that are generally accepted as by a whole and like that's what people follow. Listen, I'm watching Game of Thrones. People murder each other a lot, okay? So they have different morals in Westeros, okay? This is what I'm learning. They don't have a church.

And that's what I told them. You know, I told everyone in that cast, you're gonna go to hell for eternity That's a long time. Okay. It's log of it six seasons. I'll tell you that at least there's a blazing God. Okay, seven of them all right Okay, so Gina goes off running to the bathroom and they still just keep talking about it Yeah, oh well wait before she leaves Vicki goes What what are you gonna do when you start to date somebody else with your kids And that they don't like your kids. Thank you Sam tonight. They're your luggage

And Gina's like okay, I'm not dateable. I get it and China goes. It's not that Gina It's not that Gina, okay, what is it then everybody so Gina runs off crying and Vicki thick this dough abuse this dough addiction I mean why else would you divorce? I mean, I love, you know, I love that because it was like super boring. I was fucking Brooks at Lakita. It's across the country. It was just meeting. He said, you know, he didn't like this. Tropa, lozai bot. But you know, that's a real reason. You know, at least there were reasons there. Yeah, actually, yeah, I like this that when Gina stands up, the very first thing is Vicky saying somebody's having an affair. I mean, you know, you're talking about moral compasses and the very first thing someone gets

up and someone gets up from the table and that's what you're going to say. Yeah, which is sort of by the way. Yeah, by the way, I did look up the actual definition of morals because now it's fascinated. A person's standards of behavior or beliefs concerning what is and is not acceptable for them to do. So I think you're right. You don't have to have it doesn't have to be necessarily based off of Like it just makes me crazy because that's always what I was told growing up like well if you don't because you know of course I'm the Gina. I'm like I believe in God and That's always what I was told. Well then you're just not gonna have any moral center like everything they're saying is just so like everything

I grew up with and I'm so sick of it, you know, yeah I think it's that what when you're thinking about what is acceptable if the definition is like based off of like what one believes is acceptable the thing is what informs what makes you think what's acceptable is usually something like religion or a code of laws so well philosophy right. Oh right guys we're totally thinking out of the right time real how. So it's having a fair. So it time. Real how? So it's having a fair. So I'm having a fair.

It was a lot of fair. So it's a bit of a fair. So Emily's like, uh, Tamer goes, guess what I think? It's not of our bestness. Yeah, I'm like, didn't you just bring it up? Didn't you, weren't you the one who just brought this up? You're the one who started all this somehow. I don't know how, but you started it because you're the one,

you're the one who was, I think she was the one who riled up Vicki at the wine bar and was like, so what do you think about Gina's, you know, she's getting all divorced and it's like, why are you getting divorced, right? Like, what's up with this, you know? And now she's like, it's none of our business. Come on. So Gina is the bathroom and it does give credence to what she's been saying because she runs to the bathroom and immediately calls Matt and she's like They just so mean to me and they just don't understand what we're going through and I just need a rack and you're acting lean on and Emily's like Queen The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time.

The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time.

The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time.

The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The time. The. another one, add another number to that billboard over the four or five. And now this is just like, this many women, this one, many women got to reason in Orange County this year, 55,000. So Gina and Emily have a little talk and Emily's like, here's what you need to do. Just say thanks for sharing. And then they say, okay, and then you just hear they can have an opinion, you just don't listen to it. But here's the thing. I was friends with Matt, my best friends and we're still together. It's like, oh my god.

Oh god. I'm gonna repeat this every time you like, I have to try and support you. You're not gonna have me support you. Shut up. I actually think Emily's advice was good. She basically is saying, oh, okay, thanks. Like take in what they're saying, but like, you don't have to just like dismiss it right out front, you know. And meanwhile, outside Tamer's like, I don't think she wants to divorce. I'm like, well, good job staying out of it, Tamara, good none of your business. And she's like, well, I think she does. She still loves him.

She does him. I don't, I don't think she loves him. They're all so crazy. They're so much projecting. Yeah. And she's like, I think she does want that to force. How about that? Because like, no, nobody wants it. And then when they come back out, she tells Gina,

or yeah, Gina, she tells Gina. Did it came out? Did it just been here? Why didn't you come out? Why didn't you come out? Because you made her cry, you fucking cow. And she's like, I was upset, thank you. I just want to bother you a little.

OK, we just want to bother you. No, no. Congratulations. I bought you an SUV. You're paying for it. OK. You know, I was just very upset. And I'm not a person to show my upset to other people.

And they just cut the shenanigans during her like, upset is not a noun. Little. I mean, 30-year-old is using upset. Like it's a noun. Little Mr. Dirty World is using upset like it's a noun. Upsetism is an adjective or a verb but it's not a noun and I'm not gonna say here at this table. Well I guess the dessert is served so I will say you're a little bit longer. We all go into divorce wanting it to be happy. I'm rooting for her but chances it won't be amicable. Okay chances are it's not gonna be amicable.

You think it's gonna be amicable and Okay, chances are it's not going to be amicable. Yeah, you think it's going to be amicable until you look on Instagram and you realize you were married to a long-haired Don Not who's got a young person pregnant. Oh God, this is fun. And... Well, I just want everyone to respect that everyone's situation is different, okay?

And then they cut the shenanigans like, oh, no, I totally respect that you're situation is different, okay? And then they cut the shadow and be like, I totally respect the york will be being completely naive and dismissing my thoughts and I have very valid opinions on these things. Ah, ah, how good to get that out and by keeping it in my mouth, but it didn't get all the way out. Yeah, Shannon just does a judgmental sip of her vodka. My kind of shrugs. So then we go over to Emily's home and she's like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, she's like, there's something on the floor.

What is this? She's like, it came off of Fiskers, but. Did you say but? Yeah, it's got a garden back there Kissin Because she's like cracking up like oh my god Shane said that the dog has like a garden back there Oh, and then she puts on pineapple sunglasses and he goes funny and he goes, FINE-E! T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T succulents she's like flowers die but succulents look forever. There's such dorks what dorky plants succulent you know what succulents are they suck that's

what they're called succulents you're moon that's what I mean she brought them a suck plant so then they just air the like literally literally for like the fourth time this episode They show the clip of Kelly me like, oh bitch, so you're wrong, you bitch Like for no reason they just they just keep airing it So Emily's like, well, oh this should be interesting because Kelly has a quick fuse and Shane is snarkastic Get it snarkastic. Get it?

Snarket. She gets like a little bug on the couch with a little bug on the couch with a little bug. Little crutchy ladybug. So Kelly is like, oh, I knew you were a doll. So I'm just going to leave you alone. And Kelly is like, oh, what? How did you do that? It's weird. It's weird.

Right. So then she's like, stay. I'm like, I'll tell you what's awkward. Is the seating arrangement in this living room. They're like, it's shames in a seat that's like aimed towards a television. And then there's another couch aimed for the television. And like, Kelly is like sitting on the edge of the couch,

looking at Shane across the arm, and he's fully rotated three quarters of degrees around. The chair's rotated one way, and he's sort of twisted around. I'm like, can you guys try to sit in a proper formation right now? And I really blame Shane, because there's a full on-catch situation, and he just sits in his little chair.

Like get on the couch and look at her like a normal human being. Also, not to be all Southern trauma about it, but you're sitting there giving someone dirty looks. Like a woman is in your house, stand up. And she just sits down. It's like goes beyond manned in woman. It's like be a decent fucking host. Yeah.

I agree. I thought it was someone's coming into the principal's office. Listen here, little twerp. Okay. This woman doesn't work for you. And you're extremely lucky that she's this nice about it. Because she could come in there, rip you limb from limb. Yeah. He basically, he stood up and hugged her at the table. Like when she came in, he stood up, he went over, he took the plans, he hugged whatever.

And then they went into the living room. And then he just sat down in that chair. And the chair was, the thing is that the chair is an anti-social chair. It's not facing any of the other seats. It's only facing the TV. So the fact that he chose that chair to have a conversation with her, I just feel like I would have remained standing like you said until she sat down on the couch. And then I would have sat down on the opposing love seat or on the other part of the couch like for him to do that I it actually bothered me so much it was like to me it showed

Like a lack of awareness of the people who who were around him a lack of like manners A lack of like decency it just was like tacky. It was a tacky moment, a tacky seating position. Yeah, it was agreed. He's a little piece of shit. So she's like, don't leave. It's awkward for me. And he's like, awkward for you. You have to be awkward. So she's like, okay, listen, little twerpy twerp. I'm gonna try say we'd love because that's what I say to people I love. I've been through the forest and it's really hard and you know Steve was saying stuff and I really don't appreciate the Stephen Vicki were there Basically goes through the same thing and he's like yeah, but what did I even say?

I didn't even interject and tell you that and then I was just responding to you and she goes you'll have. And then I was just responding to you. And she goes, what happened so fast? No, I need a core reporter to sit next to me. I think that might work against you, though, a core. And then he's like, here's, here's what I have to say. If you want to confront someone, just show them what they said. And then they can't refute it. It's like right in their face.

At which point? Kind of like the editors. Oh, no, I was going to say, for me, and what happened to actually many of our viewers who also share a direct TV, got the glitch. And next thing I knew knew I was midway through the coming up this season on Orange County. Oh no, let's not explore. So basically I'm glad he's like so behind evidence because there's plenty of it of him being a cut fitness face. So he'll get

he'll get the evidence that he needs to come reunion time and probably 20 more times in clips until then. So yeah he, if you want to confront someone have evidence and she goes, well, that's the lawyer in you coming out. And she's like, uh, no, that is my common sense. Okay, it's called common sense coming out. It's not that I'm a lawyer, it's common sense. And Kelly just looks at Emily like, here he goes again. Like, do you see what he's doing? And then she goes, okay, well, I don't have sense, but I have common sense. Kelly's like willing to start a fight over this. So she just looks at her and he goes, okay. And then she says, look, she says, my choice. Here's my options. To call him a

little bitch, flick him in the forehead, give him a wetgy shove him in the locker and then grab him by the ears and slime him into my knee Or just get over it. So I'm just gonna get over it. So she's like, so what are you guys doing today? And he goes, um, well, we're probably gonna just stay here and talk shit about you and Kelly goes, uh She does that like really low guttural laugh that she does and Emily's like, she's just, no, no, I like you. And that's how it ends. So they make up, but he's basically, she apologizes, but her apology says, when I get mad, that's how I act and I was mad. So that's not an apology. It's just saying

Now you know next time I'm mad. I'm gonna act like that. And then he doesn't apologize at all And then just continues to do exactly what he was doing. So it was kind of like and let's just accept each other for now We'll fight again later. See you then. Yeah, exactly. Well, that's good. Good to see that they may have around two down the line Yeah, so that brings us to the end of Watch what happens. We will be back tomorrow with a preview of Real Housewives of New Jersey. Then on Thursday, we'll be back with Real Housewives of Dallas and Friday Shaws. Go get your tickets for New York City October 11th. We will be there. Then in Seattle in November and Nashville in December.

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and get that. Yeah, it'll be fun. We will see you next time, everybody. Thank you. Bye, everybody. Thank you. Bye everybody! Hey Prime members, you can listen to WatcherCrapins Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or, you can listen Add Free with Wondery Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash

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