Watch What Crappens - RHOD: Me Talk Pretty Jessica One Day

Episode Date: September 6, 2019

"The Real Housewives of Dallas" is back, and we are PSYCHED. First, there's the business quagmire that D'Andra finds herself in now that she runs her mothers' companies. Then there's talk of a mysterious lady named "Pretty Jessica." Consider us hooked. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watch What Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujube. And I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chas and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch what crap ends would like to think it's premium sponsors. Just saying okay. Kristi Wawardy-Dawardy.

Jamie, she has no last namey. Let's go on a bender with Lauren Fender. Zip some scotch with Jessica Trotch. Cassie Savoni, she don't take nobeloni. You don't touch the Nicki Morgan letters. Aaron McNickolas, she don't take nobelone! You don't touch the Nicki Morgan letters! Aaron McNickalus, she don't miss no trickleess. Megan the Slayer Taylor Kelly Barlow, when she goes Barlow we go high-low.

Megan Berg, you can't have a burger without the bird! Ain't no thing like Allison King. Hot dang, it's Jessica Dang. He makes a squee-rachid-ee. Sarah Greenwood, she only uses her power for good. Hannah, God I love that banana. Anderson! Higher than Iris, it's Lauren Perez.

Avonigila Weber! Lisa Wallent. Now that's what I call wallentainment. The Bay Area Betches, Betches. And our super premium Patreon subscribers. Give them hell, Miss Noel. Lulu Simon. Sue, Sue Studio.

Always ready for Nicole Passa Ready One day your Rachel's in, and the next day you're out Yes we can with Howley, Carolyn and Ann Nancy, Ceas and Desisto Holy Grant, the Grant Master Let's get Racy with Miss Stacey Shannon, out of a cannon Anthony Incredible, edible Matthew sisters

And... Mina, Kuchikuchikuchii Watch what crap means Watch what crap means Who cares what and I've been in such a crap. I've been in such a crap. I've been in such a crap. I've been in such a crap. I've been in such a crap. I've been in such a crap. I've been in such a crap. I've been in such a crap.

I've been in such a crap. I've been in such a crap. I've been in such a crap. I've been in such a crap. I've been in such a crap. I've been in such a crap. I've been in such a crap. I that we just love to watch. I'm Ben Mandelker of the Real Housewares of Kitchen Island. It's a cartoon parody of Real House House in New York available on YouTube. Okay? Joining me is the hilarious, wonderful person who also hosts the Rosebricks Bachelor Rose

podcast. It's Ronnie Caram. Hey Ronnie. Hi. How's it going? Good. We're on video today so I can see your beautiful face even though you're not anywhere near me. I know. I have a different background than usual. It's like brown and white. Because you know what? I'm actually looking like a PBS kid so in the videos.

I feel like it's something. I don't know exactly what it is but it's like'm directly bisected, or I'm bisecting this like brown and white color blocking thing. It's a striking visual, striking. The reason why I have this new background is because I'm in Denver this week. Visit in my boo, who choreographed elements of Indicent at the Denver Center performing arts. So opening night is tonight. So that's how you're by selecting before you go see Indicent. Yeah, it's just like a whole drama over there. I'm so artsy right now. But you know, Ronnie, last time I was in Denver was with you almost exactly a year ago in September of last year. And we had such a fun time, right?

We sure did. I love me some Denver girl my whole family well Not my whole family but a bunch of my family came cousin Jen and read with their anti-bridge it Lindy We had a great time member. Yeah, we had a great time. We did a live show We talked about real house house of Dallas, which is appropriate since we are gonna be discussing the season premiere today and You know, we love Denver so much much why don't we just come back here yeah let's go back to Denver great guys we're coming back to Denver it is official

decided let's do it it is official we are coming back to Denver and we're coming in December we said there'd be one more city that be in our schedule all the details are gonna be up on Tuesday but we're giving you a little sneak peek now. So if you want to see us here in Denver, and we're not gonna be as far away from the city center this time around, if you wanna see us in Denver, get yourself ready on Tuesday because that is when the presale is gonna start,

that's when all the details are going to drop, but we're teasing it now. So that's the news, that's the first big piece of news. The other big piece of news is that this podcast is nominated for a podcast award. To you. To them. We're nominated for it. Yeah. Thank you. Wait, tell us. Tell us everything. Okay. So guys, we're idiots, right? They've nominated us like a month ago. We're like, oh, thanks. We didn't know how to do it. You were us. So we're like, oh, that's cool. But you actually have to go vote for it. So go vote for it. Let's win this shit. Okay. We've never won anything like that.

Never, never even won anything from an M&M's pack. No, then when they have contests. And do you know how many M&M's I beat in my goddamn life? I deserve something. Wait a second. I like how you make it sound like a nationwide M&M contest would be something that's easily won. Okay. Like how you make it sound like a nationwide M&M contest would be something that's easily won. Okay. Ben, I've eaten like, it's like Willie Wonka. If it was Willie Wonka in the chocolate factory, I would be the chunky kid eating every chocolate bar in town. And then at the very end, you see him get that golden ticket, but that he never gets the

golden ticket. You know, I've earned this. I think the only thing I ever won of one two things I once won a three-dimensional Tick-Tock Toe set for my synagogue as a kid that was very exciting and then I also once won bottom-dancing lessons like a raffle in North Hollywood. So those are the only two things of one. Love it. Okay, so devote for this so I can get over my M&M drama. Go to podcastawards.com. That's podcastawards.com and then we're nominated for the Adam Curry's People Choice Award against a lot of really good people. Yikes. So please go vote. We need you. And then we're

also in TV and film, which is our normal, our normal. And guess you were against where against Ellen on the go. Oh, how is that even fair? You better get the hell out of here, Ellen. Generous. I'm taking you down. That's not fair that we have to go up against Ellen. That's not fair. Listen, we need to mobilize. So not I'm going to actually say this. Not only should you vote, but then post on your social media to tell other people to vote for us because

we have no. It's also against Ellen. It's also against Ellen. And also I'm kind of offended because we're against the Game of Thrones the podcast and winter is crappin' against not against Game of Thrones the podcast. Dude. I'm the only person who could be nominated for something and then be totally pissed off. Okay. But anyway, no, I'm not pissed off. I'm so excited. So go vote first. It is really cool. It is the only thing I really care about my pretending about. Yeah, I'm important. So go vote. Go vote and then go tell all your groups and all your Twitter people and Instagram, all that fun stuff. Let's mobile. Yeah.

Finally, guys, I know we're we're going to get to Dallas, but I just want to say we have to do a quick. I'm just going to go down the list of the shows that are available. And real quickly, our New York City show is now officially sold out. All every single ticket for the early show is gone. But we saw the late show. So here are the shows. Come see us. Charlotte, North Carolina, Nashville, Tennessee, two shows in Atlanta, Carbrow, North Carolina, Richmond, Virginia, Tampa, Florida,

Fort Lauderdale, Indianapolis, Two shows in Chicago, one is sold out, two shows in New York City, one is sold out, St. Louis actually getting pretty low there too. Philadelphia, one show is sold out there, but we have another late show, Seattle, and then starting next year we have Houston, and of course stay tuned for the Denver announcements next week. It's really awesome. A lot of these shows are starting to get towards their low ticket alerts. Like Charlotte is actually, Charlotte, there's like people are responding. So thank you guys.

Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. Thank you for listening to all our announcements today. Let's get on, to the real deal of potatoes of this. Let's talk about real housewives of Dallas. Ugh. Let's get to the meat potatoes, put in a big glass bowl, squirt and some ketchup over it, and then mixing it all with our hands, and then just feeding our children with it.

As they would do on this show, like they did last season. Real housewives of Dallas. Wow. So good. I'm not going to lie. I was a little nervous going into the season premiere because all the commercials that Bravo has been showing up in like really like fun and nice and happy and I was like is Dallas going a little soft on us and they just like just they just barge into the season with just all they just

drop all the shit right on you. I mean this show is so good. It feels so good. It is so good. They totally tricks me as far as like I Brandy. I left the episode liking Brandy. And for those of you who are new to our Dallas recaps, every recap I hate somebody, right? I've always been like that. If I have a job in a grocery store, I'm gonna hate one check out person. Like that's just how I am. I pick one person and I focus all my hatred on them.

And usually it's Brandy on this show. And I was like, wait, why do I like Brandy? Yeah. Oh. Oh. That's for the crew. I thought like wait, why do I like Brandy? Yeah. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, delegation shamelessly. I love Mama D just being more evil than we ever thought she could be. Um, and I just, yeah, and these women, they just, they don't hold back in their, in their interviews. You know, I feel like I've spent really the, the last several months talking about why Beverly Hills has been failing so much. And I really shouldn't, the season's over. I should just put it to bed.

But I just feel like it's always important to remind everyone what is wrong with Beverly Hills, aka Kyle Richards, okay? Because you have Leon Lackin, you have Leon Lackin doing her interviews with me like, she's a fucking bitch, like she just goes in, you know, and Kyle's like, I just don't like her, you know, just another, it just underscores again to me why are we having an issue with Kyle Richards? Yeah, this whole thing circles back to Kyle Ritz. Yeah, I have everything Well, Mama D came out and also we have a new housewife now You know the world has gotten very sensitive over the years and people are already fighting about like this ladies accent

And this and this welcome to watch what crap is because we're gonna do terrible accents for anybody who comes on this show Yeah, and Carrie is definitely gonna be amazing. I don't have it now. The accent probably won't be hard, but her accent is like kind of like a smoky voice. It's like, she's had like 19 packs of cigarettes today. Oh, yeah. It's gonna be hard to get it.

It's gonna be a lot of work. I know I wouldn't even try it. You guys, don't get offended. Get over your side. If you're offended, turn the fucking radio off. You, you're listening and we're not on the radio anyway So start listening to podcasts the second of all stop listening to this shit. I'm gonna say right now It's yeah vote for it, but also understand that I haven't even tried to do her accent So it's probably gonna come off sounding like a like a pan Latin America sort of generic, you

know, Latina accent. And I'm not trying to say that she just like all Latinas sound just like this no matter who they are. It's more like I'm just working on trying to get more specific with her voice. So just know that. So don't get offended because she is hilarious and we've got to try it. We've got to probably take us a whole season to get her voice down. But man, once we get it, it's gonna be glorious.

I can promise you that because she's already glorious. But I'm also mourning a little bit, the loss of Carrie Doober. I miss her because I really, I enjoyed first of all your impersonation affair, which I thought was a low key. One of your best impersonations was your Carrie voice. Plus I also just enjoyed just both of us going girl

girl, which Cameron still maintains that legacy the certain extent but not in the carry duper way. Cameron really does whip out all the girl. Yeah, I'm a scary duper to you, but she's so shady. You know, it's like one of those housewives things. She's like She's nothing like Yolanda, but she's like the Yolanda in the way that she's got someone to fight for her anyway. Like this new carry comes back to fight for the old carry and a fight that they've already made up over. Yeah, I feel like new carry, basically carry is like,

okay girl, take my name and upgrade it to a K and you just take it from there. Girl. Yeah, okay, so let's get to the beginning. Let's start at the beginning. So much to unpack. Let's start with our opening lines for the new season. Shall we do that? Oh, let's do it.

Yeah, so the first one we have is Leanne who goes, Dale, this is a pageant that I always win. Which is sort of odd as is Leanne going to be doing a beauty pageant this year. I don't understand why we are moving away from carnivals to pageants I feel like we should always stay in carnivals, right? Right, but at least she's like still winning something I guess because hers is always like I want a bull Yeah, I feel like hers should have been like just because I was raised on a Ferris wheel doesn't mean I like going around and round I looked up

Okay, cuz this is how sad, this is how much I thought this season was probably not going to be great, because look, it's not this show that's done it to me. It's because of other housewives shows. Yeah, but I didn't even write down the name, so I had to Google them right now. And of course, I had to read like a huge article first about everybody's dresses before I finally got to it Okay, so now Cameron Cameron just because I look like a Barbie doesn't mean you can play me. I Think that's pretty good. I actually think that's like probably the best one of the season. That's a great line I love it. No one plays a Barbie. You play with a Barbie

That's true. It doesn't make me dramatic. Okay, I take it back. There's it's missing a preposition and it changes the entire meaning of it. Okay. Only can't play a play a Barbie. People play Barbie like a concept. Let's go play Barbie and you're going to play with your Barbie dolls, I think. Right? Children. Children who don't know how to speak properly. Yes. Say things like that. Just because I look like Barbie doesn't mean you shouldn't choose your words carefully. Barbie are you trying to play me?

Dumb Barbies get played smart Barbies get everything. Okay, so you go next. Okay, carry on. Okay, carry on. Okay, Well, here's the debut of debut even to me in my carry voice I'm bilingual, but I don't speak BS I mean, okay, I like that. All right works. It works. Oh, that makes sense because by lingual Oh, that's I was wondering why did she say BS in such a strange way Because you're trying to emphasize by lingual and BS Maybe cuz the buy in the B okay

Trying to really stretch it. You're really stretching a defensive housewives today. I'm trying to make fetch happen basically You're really starting off the season with the kind heart. I think it's because I'm super caffeinated. Okay, see you do the next one because you have more kindness. Okay, it's brandy. Will you mess with a ginger, expect some spice? Yeah, that's fun. It's cute, cute. We're getting some, we're getting pop culture references

this year. That's what Dallas is giving us. Barbeage, Interspace, you know, but yeah, but this is when I knew something was off because usually Brandy's opening line will fill me with such rage that I'm literally foaming at the mouth and like spitting French fries out. Like, even if you haven't even eaten French fries, they just form in your mouth and then spit them out. There's always a French fry ready to spew out of my mouth. But she wasn't last year like even when you're a Dallas cheerleader you can still fit in your cheerleader outfit. Something like that. Just because I'm a mother of three kids doesn't mean that I'm better than you. It does mean I'm better than you. I'm better than you. It does mean I'm better than you. I'm better than you.

Add a cheerleader. But this year I was like, okay, that was actually cute. So then Deandra, I love this. I'm minding my business to start minding yours. That's so Deandra. I was surprised she didn't end it with mother. Mother. You know that, but I was always talking about business,

business, business. Do you know how many takes I head to probably do of that before before she stopped saying mother? They're like okay, Deandra We want you to say the line, but don't say mother because it's actually not written in the line. Okay got it I'm mind-to-mob business mother so start mind on yours. No, no, we don't mean to put it in the middle Why don't you try it? Just like not saying it. Okay. Okay. Okay mother. Okay. I'm mind-to-mob business. So start mind-to-mob No, Deandra. No, you just moved into the middle. Okay. I saying it. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, I'm not my business. I'm not in yours No, dad, I know you just moved into the video. Okay, I got it. I got it I'm under my mother you start busy your mother Let's just just just when you think of the word mother don't say it. How about say it silently to yourself? Okay, okay

Mother I'm mother and you're my mother and I want my mother mother mother mmm the air of the floor solving the giant taffin address now you know what I felt bad about Ronnie and I thought this was cruel I thought this was cruel that they didn't offer to they didn't offer Stephanie an opportunity to come in and do her shot a little bit, like maybe a few days later.

Poor Stephanie, she got some sort of sunburn. Did you notice that? Mm-hmm. She has a sunburn and she has tan lines and she is doing there, she's standing there and she's twirling around and they tried to make it go away. As, you know, they may try to make it go away or they may her look like they had a sunburn because she is fully sunburned

in her dress doing her twirl. I was like, couldn't they have scheduled her shoot like two days later against the green screen? Can't they let that fade a little bit? No, because Dallas is one of those shows that it's amazing to us, but it's it didn't have the best first season ever. And so they still give it $5 every year. They're like, hey, you guys want to shoot in front of a fountain at the public library?

I just I felt that day and that was it, man. I felt that and, and, but you know, although if anyone is going to enjoy that's going to be Stephanie because she's going to look at it every week and just laugh. Yeah, like I'm rich. I'm not some brand because I was in Ibiza. True, true. So her line is, I never carry a grudge. It won't match my shoes. And my husband is going through mid-life crisis and he's probably cheating on me. And she was like, Travis has lost so much weight. He's skydiving.

He is just looking better than ever. I mean, it's like he's a kid again. I was like, you know, it's cheating on you, right? You know, that's like, I've never had a friend. He said that about their husband who is just like, really self-improving. I was like, you better get a vagina detective out there immediately, man. And let me tell you something. if he has an episode this season where he pierces his ear

We have a real problem. Okay, I was going down remember when Harrison Ford pierced his ear and like and you're you're already like married to Clista flock heart like what is happening? Why are you having why are you having a middle of crisis when you're 78 years old? I don't get this Is it is it bad that I feel like it's okay to cheat on Ali McBeal? I think I just watch that show so much and I'm like, fuck all this to flock heart off Ali McBeal. Like I'm victim saving and I don't even know if he did anything. I'm actually surprised that Ali McBeal is not a new cast member of the Real House House of Beverly Hills probably because they like live on a branch in Montana somewhere. I feel like he married Ali McBeal and locked

her in like the playroom closet. And like we're never going to see her again or hear from her again. She's not allowed to talk and I feel like he just throws chicken bows at her head. How much vanda shepherd do you think plays in that household? Like all the time. What was that song? What was the Ali McBeal song? I don't remember.

I remember the guy talked about waddles a lot. Yeah. I never got into it. I'm going to move on from Ali McBeal because I talked about waddles a lot. Yeah, I never got to be on for Malibu. Okay. I'm going down a weird path now. Oh, also people who are on this show don't listen to this show. Fuck off. This isn't for you. Okay. And also when we see you in a public we're going to kiss you and hug you real time. People around me. Okay. Is that a message? This is a message for the Dallas cast. Yes.

Love you. We're going to rip you apart. If Recording knows the time for commercial break, they'll just add, but they work. Wow, wow. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, someday, parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful take on parenting. Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brown-Oller, we will be your resident

not-so-expert experts. Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding, and thinking, oh yeah, I have absolutely been there. We'll talk about what went right and wrong. What would we do differently? And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone. So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world,

listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. We're coming to Charlotte on September 26th. There's mostly only balcony tickets left and they are going quickly. Go to watchacrapans.com to get yours. So the episode opens up with a little Trixi Monical actually, which was a lovely surprise. I was not expecting that. Did you hear that? Did you notice Trixi? Of course, the best surprise is that Trixi Monical apparently found new people to record

with because now she's been like a 50s girl group for a lot of other bands. She's like, I'm sick of Paul. Okay. I saw a new band. It's called Trixi Monical and the potato peelers, you know? I'm just workshopping it. Trixi and the potato peelers. We've got Monica and Trina.

And they're like her do-up girls in the back. Yeah. Because they're new song is... I like it. I like it. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. And then we see a Dallas none, which in this case, the Dallas none means a blonde woman who's wearing black and white. We see her walking down the street. She's not in the cast. She just didn't like stride. She's basically wearing a semi habit.

But of course, like, she probably isn't none, but you know that the Nonsense Dallas still have big blonde hair and they're like, I'm not having this. And huge eyelashes. And it's hot as fuck too. I mean, the Nons are probably a bikini's over there. I mean, that city is not fucking around. Well, we went there. I almost fell over dead.

Okay. Yeah. It's too much for me. Ben was like, Hey, you want to go downstairs and wait for the car? And I was like, No, will me out on a luggage dolly when the car is out there and just puts me into the car and only if it's air condition. Yeah, I was luck out there. Okay, so we're looking around Dallas. Guess what Dallas still has lots of statues of bulls and the bull statues. Lots of statues of bulls and of course, the trolley. The comic trolley. The trolley is like, oh, you may hit me, but I, I will not be put down.

I am here. I am defiant and I am the survivor of Leon Lackin. Maybe it should be Trixi Monacoel and the trolley potatoes. Ooh, I love that. Trixi Monacoel and the trolley potatoes. Yes. It's so good. And what's the other one's name after I remember it. Wait, trick me three are Marked to us. No, no, the other one's name after I remember it. Wait, trick wait, a three hour mark to us.

No, no, the other girls name because there's two do op girls. So there's three just named them. Trina and I forgot the other one. She's already been fired. She's already been dropped like in the early, definitely child members. I say Amber. Amber. Amber is always a hateable girl in a backup.

Because some girl named Amber is never going to sing backup. She's always going to try and steal the lead, you know. I really wish you had watched Love Island UK. I could make it up right now. So I'm literally saying today, by the way, how long is this recap? We're in 20 minutes and we've only discussed the B roll footage in the first shot of the scene. That's all. So, um, so then we get, so then we get the 24 panels where we see like the screen splits up to the four panels and we see what everyone's doing. So we see Travis pushing Stephanie on some sort of circular swing, clearly trying to like send her off into

a ravine somewhere. Um, we see Brandy washing Bruin, we see Deandra changing her comfort or something, looking for a few extra dollars perhaps Dandres first shot is making a bet I felt so bad for her. I was like, yes, they're bringing Deandra down this season Actually, I'm not sure about that. I have a theory that they're gonna try to make Leanne the villain this season again I am always the villain. I know, but okay, I'll just say it because I noticed that when they later on in the episode when there was the Like the friend who mentioned the angle was very much like the andro was coming in trying to Make make a man's and move things forward and she's gonna like put things to the side and that it was Leanne Who was really like not accepting the apology and so it seems a little bit to me like the angle was that Deandra was trying

to be the bigger person so I think that they might be trying to make Deandra sympathetically who knows they will just be like New York where everyone's just sort of like the hope of the war and all the yeah hopefully yeah and then we see Cam and she's getting her dog a part of cure and she's getting her dog a pot of cure. It was so cute. Look at your pink booties. Yeah, the dog comes back from his pot of cure with pink booties. He looked like he just walked through a crime scene.

I was like, uh, did somebody die back there? They're like, yeah, it's, um, yeah, pink booties. That's all. Yeah, someone tried playing Barbie and she splattered all over the back now. And then we see Leanne. We ultimately end on Leanne walking into a place called Prash, which is an event space run by a lady named Prash. Hi, Prash. Hi, Prash. So Leanne goes in there. Leanne's hair is

down to the back of her knees. I don't know how she, she's obviously not taking public transportation anymore because that shit would get stick in the bus doors. Like, how do you live with hair like that? I feel like she is auditioning for, like, to be, like, Mama Cass or something, like, with that long hair. Like, for the coroner's and the poppers, you know what I'm saying?

We would not speak of Mama Cass. Well, I'm on the job. Ain't that right, Marnie? All the leaves are brown. And the sky is gray. It's my favorite thing. Trixie likes the brown lives. She's like, California, not dreaming.

She's trying to work that into the next the next gate, the next song. So yeah, she's meeting with Prash and she's also talking to the the what's his name? The Kevin Lee of this show. Oh, so Steve, Steve walks in and who magically gets gayer every time I see him, you know, I mean, that is something I've got to give that guy credit. He is the most adorable gay puppet, I think, on all of TV. Yeah, he walks in looking like Chris Kardashian and he has some sort of like robots. He does. And Leanne goes, that may unfarks glitter people.

He unfarks glitter. And then they see a shot of him and he sort of like like, last is a crisis over. And they actually added in golden glitter. That's make it look like he actually farted golden glitter. I was like, the fact they added CGI on this show is pretty amazing. And I really respect him too, because you know, I really like old movies about Queens, not gay people, but like real Queens like Queen, Queen Elizabeth goes after Mary Scott's or whatever the fuck that. I don't, I don't understand them, but I watch them. Anyway, the point is I really like when they lace themselves up and corsets and they have to have like three serving girls who, you know, got their families traded them off in a poker

tournament or something and then they have to like get corseted up. I just, the point is I love his corsets. I want three, I want three people. You're making a guy a sparrow over there. I want next time you see me. My boobs are like out from my chin. I just want to be corseted like him. I'm so excited. Maybe there'll be a lintfinity corset. You can wear this corset anyway you want. You never know. So Leanne is, she's by the way, she's also talking about how she's lightened up her hair. She's like, I was actually blonde for 40 years.

I came out of my mother's womb, blonde. I also came out of my mother's womb, but not of my hands. So that was also a whole other situation. Yeah, I also came out of my mother's womb with tickets coming my mouth, and when coming out of my mouth from anyone got a ski ball, but we'll talk about that later. To be fair my mother was right

on the trabalan take the time so when I came out of my mother's room it was a whole mess. Okay. Have you ever given birth while going backwards? I came out of my mother's room with the cleanest blonde hair ever because someone was shooting a water gun at me with water until the balloon blew up and boom it was my head. You know can I just have a normal birth? I've never getting a water gun at me with water until the balloon blew up and boom it was my head. You know, can I just have a normal birth? I've never had a water birth. Okay, have you ever heard of the Dunk Tank birth? Yeah.

Mama, let me tell you something. You haven't lived until you've been birthed while on a slide, okay? Mama, I'm gone on that burlap sack and said, by the time I get the bond in the slide, you're getting out of me. And gosh, don't it? I not only did I slide right off I slid right onto that swings and spun around until my hair turned black. I started water birds. By the way, I feel

like I have to clarify that since I compared Leanne to Mama Cass I was not making a commentary on her weight I feel like I mean I assume not she's like the size of a pinky. That's true But you know people are gonna be like how rude even though it's not rude and be compared to Mama Cass is actually a wonderful thing Yeah, everybody stop body shaming Mama Cass hasn't she taken enough hasn't she taken right? Hasn't she taken enough. I'll tell you one thing, I won't go near a sandwich, not alone. Not the first person I've seen choke on a ham sandwich, I'll tell you that much. So we're getting to walk around the event space and all the plans for the wedding and

Prash is like, for this wedding, we're going to use all real candles. And I love that that's like, that's like the bar of like a fancy wedding now, is that all the candles are going to be real, real? Yeah. And she's, she's catching us up on what happened last year. She's like last year, Dandruff said, Rich, you cheat. No, me. And then we get that clip of them sitting on a park bench where Dandruff was wearing that depression era Yes, it was like hold down over the door key Parker. She's like I just came from a vicious circle also known as mom's dinner table See look like she just stepped off a cheese line and she had like those big earrings I cannot believe these earrings actually caught on. I'm so mad about them. Those

Tassel earrings right those things. Yeah, they're everyone. Yeah, and wearing those and I was just cracking up at that clip. That was a really funny season. Yeah, it was so good. So Prash is like, so I was thinking that like for the bouquet, like, I don't know, like do you still have like a grandma's wedding dress or something where you can use some of it in the bouquet and lands like, um, I'll have to look through my stuff. Would you accept her or have punched subway loyalty card? Can we use that in the DuPouquet and lands like, um, I'll have to look through my stuff. Would you accept her or have punched subway loyalty card?

Can we use that in the bouquet? Well, last time I left her house, she threw a suit in my head, and I've still got the heel from that. It took a long time to get it out, still got a mark. Why would you feel about using an oversized stuffed animal that you may have wanted to ring toss?

Uh, uh, uh, uh. Uh, uh, uh, like this really nice thing because they're planning her wedding, but it's also, Leana's framing it like, oh really? Well Dandra said that Rich was cheating on me. Now I'm getting married. But look, we have stood by each other. We have loved each other. We have possibly shot someone together and buried him under some orientals. We are getting married.

And no one's gonna do. Whoa, whoa, you're coming out real strong over there. Real strong. So of course the big question is, is the Andra going to be coming to the wedding? And Leanne's like, no, I want to be happy. Okay, I don't want to be. I want a negative play pool around me.

Okay, I haven't heard from De I want I want a negative people around me Okay, I haven't heard from Deandra since her apology three months ago Okay, because apparently the issue at the reunion I forgot that they were gonna go see a relationship counselor or something and Apparently that just never happened because obviously it was never gonna happen in the first place Yeah, well, yeah, and it didn't seem like it was gonna happen because the way at the end it, she's like, but I can dare be with you, of course I will, mother. She was like, they obviously hated each other

at the end of that. Exactly. And so Leanne's like, you imploded this friendship, not me, okay? I'll tell you what I imploded, balloons, we're the dark, that's what I imploded. So she's going over the cost of the wedding which weddings are no joke man, you know, this goes to my theory diolone because this This is bullshit. Okay. I'm watching flipping shows where they're like we have $30,000 to turn a pizza shit house into a gorgeous

Mansion, but then I have this bitch Prash telling me that it's gonna cost $40,000 for a wall of flowers. You know what? Prash? Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck your flowers. Fuck your flowers. Yeah. Do you know how many load-bearing walls could be taken care of with the price of one flower wall? I know, seriously. So, but of course Prash is going to throw in a big discount because Leanne has been so good to her. And Leanne, basically, is like, listen, I'm not rich. Okay, I'm literally not rich. He's the guy over there with the eye patch. Get it? Anyway, I don't have money. So what I do and say is I connect people. So for instance, I connect a

Prash with David's Brottle, with Jared, with Red Lobster. And now they all love me. That's how I get by. My catering will be done by Touchy Bobhops. Okay, because I grew up with Touchy. I wish Lian's wedding was catered by Red Lobster actually. That wouldn't be great. Delicious. I'll be totally into that. Yeah, I picked the lobster. You're gonna murder that day and just go go. I'll go totally into that. Yeah, pick the lobster you're going to murder that day and just go go I'll go ham on it. Sorry, Mama Cass, that was for you. We love you.

We'll know the fact she choked on a ham and lobster sandwich in between two cheesy biscuits. Um, yeah. So Liam is hustling her wedding, which I actually really like seeing because usually people on here are loaded and they're like We spent $19,000,000 on a wedding. Also, I donated $20 to a dog shelter. You know, and she's like, Yeah, Fuck this, I'm poor. I'll trade you a fried chicken for a flower wall.

You met fried chicken flower wall people. They go growing and as usual, she only has seven weeks to do everything. I mean, that's the standard Bravo thing right you know like even though they got engaged you know two seasons ago they only start their planning now seven weeks ahead of time so which means we cost money yeah exactly so now actually I wish it's Liam had built this wedding and and in seven weeks and then sold it to somebody else like flipped the wedding. Okay, like that's how it is these shows I am.

I'm like you get you for a thing, bro. Yeah, you do all the planning and then you just sell all the planning. You sell the wedding, yeah, make the profit. It's kind of ingenious, Ronnie. Right? Flip her flop, wedding style. Exactly.

So now we go over to Deandra and Jeremy at home and Jeremy is prepping some frames for it's not he's gonna be putting some pictures up on the wall and Deandra's like you didn't even ask me what I wanted in their mother Yeah, wow Deandra what a start for a season first of all Jeremy looks like he's How do I say this? Jeremy looks like he's murdered one of the oldest men in Deadwood and is wearing his skin right now. I don't know if Jeremy has just been laying out the sun all summer

long or what, but then he's looking exhausted. The Andra is looking pissed. She looks like she's been crying and her eyeliner is like this, you know, like she's looking through binoculars. She had like a prank binoculars, but it's not like a prank binoculars. She, Jeremy, you know what? Like we always say that Jeremy looks like Al Gore. He's like, for the first three seasons, or first two seasons of Jeremy, he was like classic Al Gore.

And now he's like an inconvenient example. Global warming happening on Al Gore. Like, global warming literally happened to all over Al Gore. He still looks hot though somehow. He's still hot. I'd still do him. I'd still do. But he's definitely like something stressful happened to him in between seasons. Her name is Dan Dora. I mean, Dan Dora is on a tear this season, right? So we open with her like, you didn't even ask me what I'm on the date that's right. And he's like, well, honey, I'm getting a print for that cab story. I just printed. And I'm like, Cabernet, taxi cabs, I don't really care. This shit's going to be hilarious.

Put it up immediately. Yeah, put it up. We also see that Deandra has lined her hair to the same shade as Leanne. And later on, actually, Stephanie even mentions it. But like my first reaction was like, these two just can't get away from each other can they? Yes, and they both accuse each other of doing it on purpose right? Because that's why Leanne started this, she started the whole season off by going by the way, I was born a blonde, I've always been blonde. Yeah. Because she's gonna get in there. She had this hair first. Exactly. And when we saw that scene, I just thought like, oh that's why she's doing her hair like this. But now we see, oh, she's taking claim, right? She's taking claim.

Yes. So, yeah. So Deandra, the wild saga of Deandra, it's just, it's going in such a hilariously evil direction, okay? Like right off the bat, and I just am like cracking up once she starts dropping this bomb. Because guess what? Remember how for the first two seasons of DeAndre it was all about her want to take over mom's

company. So she finally did and at the end of last season I was like that's great but now we sort of don't have that great story anymore. Well guess what? Mama D left her a shit company because because basically, the sadiest of all shady monster mothers on Bravo, and I want to have a raffer. I want to have a power B-Maw wig pray for, like one of those Dev commercials where all those normal girls just pull off their blonde wigs, you know? But it's all of us just with power B-Maw wig, so.

I mean, I wanted to like just give us the ending ovation right in the middle of the scene because Deandre is like already choking up. She's like well, I didn't realize they you know I didn't realize that they basically that the company was in such bad shape. I was like It's like the it's like the ending of a great film noir where the theme Yeah, it gets away with it in some in some way and you're like oh I see what mama do is yeah, Yeah, she finally gets away with it and then she opens the treasure box

and there's just like a teddy bear in there and something. It's like, oh. Last year when mother turned over to the company to me, I was so excited. Because it's everything I ever wanted. But I didn't know what was being given to me. I'm like, you fucking idiot.

Did you not ever look at paperwork ever? Exactly. It's called due diligence. Oh my god. So she's like, she's telling Jeremy. She's like, I met with Esther the other day and I was like, is it something I did? This is company is on the trajectory that it's on. And she said, no, mother would have her go into secret meetings and say, don't tell Deandra. Don't tell Deandra. Don't tell Deandra. It's so amazing. But Deandra also says they started losing money ever since they stopped advertising in Christian television. Wasn't that Deandra's idea to stop?

Wasn't she the one saying we have to stop doing Christian television to go to like mass market? Or was that just in my brain? I don't know. She said we have to stop doing it. But that is how they always sold it. Like you can see clips of it on YouTube and stuff, and it's hilarious.

I mean, they're selling something called green miracle to Christians. Like, you're literally selling miracles to Christians. So, you have to imagine that it was Deandra who said, okay, I'm on Bravo now, and like, I have a certain audience in this and that, and we can't be doing this on Christian television anymore. You know that Dee was like,

but that's where we always had our customers, D and D raw. And you know it was a big fight. And then of course, D and D was like fine. D is probably like fine. Let's take it off of Christian television and sleep. What happens? And then of course, sales are detained. It's like, okay, now it's yours.

Now it's yours. It's a whole big pass of aggressive handing off of the company and it is fabulous. It really is. And I don't think it's even passive aggressive. You know, she wanted to walk around all the time, actually, she's running this company. She's making the decisions, but she doesn't get to,

she doesn't get to own it. No, no, no, no, no. So now she can't say she doesn't know what's going on. It's like, which was alive that you were actually doing everything before or I don't know, but it is just such a funny, funny story. Like if she is freaking the fuck out of her. She is.

And it's like, they told her the day before shooting that she has 90 days left of this business. And on top of that, now Deandra has to live with the suspicion that her mother set her up to fail, which is like so fucked up. And it's just hilarious that this is weighing over her that D somehow gets the final laugh. It is amazing. But it's also so shitty like, you know, you framed your mother as a villain all this time saying

she's such a bitch and she won't give you what you deserve and you deserve this company. You've owned this company. You've done all the work for this company anyway and this should be yours. Nen she gives it to you and now she's a villain again and you go on national television and tell everybody that she's swindled you and she's a fucking villain again. You earn off a little monster and I cannot wait until she cuts your ass off at the last second. Well, she's already cutting her off because pre-cutting her off because Dianne just been trying to take a loan out against her trust. And he's like, no, not allowed. And he won't let her touch her money at all. And on top of that, D is basically been causing D'Andre

to live in fear that she will never get her trust money because D is still the custodian of it. Custodian of it. And you know why D will never die? Green miracle. Green miracle. And you might know that if you watch 700 Club, soaker.

Oh my god, it is such an amazing mother-daughter relationship I love this I did too. I was like squealing over here like a little girl cracking up at this because just it just kept going So Jeremy's like honey. I know she's like mother controls every single thing and I'm not having it and Jeremy's like honey I know I'm not the breadwinner of this household. I'm doing a cab exhibit but listen, I don't need all this this I know I'm not the breadwinner of this household. I'm doing a cab exhibit. But listen, I don't need all this, this stuff, and he's like pouring it at a table and chairs. You know, and she's like,

Yes, you do, that's a table of chairs. And she's like, oh, my husband asks I get to know big deal that we can, and we can just lift this tiny little fun fun that I have tiny house, but his artwork ain't made of the bells. And we've got, he's got real use to this cushion little lifestyle. Oh my God. Yeah, it's all going down. Yeah, and she's like, listen, I want a car with air conditioning. Okay.

I'm like, you know, Deandra, this is not doing like great wonders to to dispel the rumors started last season that you only have $200 left in your account. If you're worried about not getting your car with air conditioning, then that makes me wonder about what's so funny. That was her huge thing last year. She was mad about Leanne suggesting that she used poor, but now she's making her whole storyline. Yes. She's still mad that Leanne suggested that she's poor. It's like, the casting on this show is just... So she's going to have Jeremy come to the office. Yeah, it is just like that. She's going to have Jeremy come to the office to just like sit in and listen and see if he can spot any areas where they could maybe be saving themselves.

So that's going to be like painted in armadillo last week, but okay, I'll sit in your financial meetings Danstra. Yeah, exactly. I took a picture of a crackle, but sure, I can probably tell you how to say $60,000. So now we go over to Stephanie's house. And that was for you, Ronnie, the crackle. That was for you. I have a question reference.

I liked it. So we go over to Stephanie's house where Brava does its favorite thing, which is make it sound like people are having sex We are oh, that's it all right all right Oh and it's just Stephanie and Travis zipping around their Feuer on hoverboards, which are like a thing from two years ago Yeah, but it is cute seeing them spend time together and her not you know waving a list around in her hand So I was very happy for that. She's like I feel like Travis and I aren't an amazing place right now

I just feel like very connected to him as we watch footage of him actively trying to speed away from her in circles and circles And they're just riding around in their mansion and she's like last year And they're just riding around in their mansion and she's like last year. Hello, can we get Harvard for four weeks? And this year, he went again, but this year was easier because I got used to it from last year when it was really like hard because like, I don't know, it's like, I don't know, it's just really hard, but like, that's easy. Well, turns out Travis got me this hoverboard and if I just go around and around where the pool in our foyer used to be it distracts me from the fact that he's been gone and

Shaving his chest and working out and like not cheating at all You better not be I'll kill him. I would kill him if they bring down Stephanie this year I'm really gonna be pissed definitely is one of the only housewives of all housewives ever that you never dislike. She's not boring and she's still sweet. You know, that's a very tough thing to achieve. They better not bring her down. I will not stand for it. I don't think it's possible for Stephanie to have an evil storyline. Like I can't imagine her being the villain. Like her being the villain would be something like she put Chaluella sauce on your omelette.

And she didn't want it. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. It's just her crying. I'm so sorry. So she's talking, so she's they sit down and they're talking and Travis is looking good. He's like a hot Flintstone right now. You know, Travis like the ultimate Flintstone and now he's like a hot Flintstone. Yeah. He's in hot Flintstone mode. And you know we did mention this on a previous episode, but we met Travis back in April and he was like a lot better looking in person and his

sexual energy is like no joke. Like it oozes off of him. Like I felt like he might be ready to have sex with all of us. Like I was just like, oh, I was like, I'm feeling it. Like I wasn't, I'm not saying he's gay. I'm just saying like, he had that sexual... No, not that kind of sexual energy. Like charisma, you know? There was something, there was something

shockingly charismatic about Travis. I was shocked, but we actually walked away and we're like, that was weird, right? Like Travis is hot. Yeah, like, yeah, it's like that thing where that charisma just makes someone hot. And you're like, that, that's weird, right? That's weird.

Yeah. It was weird. I've stoned out over it. Yeah. So anyway, they're talking about how dandruff and Leanne are still fighting. And dandruff is turning 50 and Leanne's getting married. So they should try and be nice to each other.

And Travis is like, oh my god god, Dan dr's older than me. You've just let every woman come up to here. Yeah, you know, Dan dr is just at home like oh, other freaking out. Okay, calm down. Count to L 22 L1 L2 L3 L4. So then this is one Stephanie is like, well in the past few months, he's been like, you know, like working out. He's like a new man. He's like skydiving climbing up the side of mountains, out running trains. I'm like, Oh, no, please don't be cheating. Please.

So now that I've talked to Travis, I'm like, he's too sexy. Keep him in a cage. Yeah, keep him keep him in a cage with dim lights. So by the way, who is this Harvard girl is what I want to know Who's this girl named Harvard that he's going to be? Yeah, exactly. I don't trust him now. My ambiolic. Oh, I think she went to Yale. So anyway Could you imagine if Travis were having a fair with my ambiolic that would be so scandalous in so many different ways? Yeah, really would so Stephanie's like talking about how she was scandalous in so many different ways. Yeah, really would.

So Stephanie's like talking about how she was, Stephanie's telling Travis about DeAndre's situation with her company. And she basically is saying, Travis, you should probably sit down and DeAndre and help her out, which is probably like the smartest thing that has happened because say what you will about Travis, at least he has gone to HBS for eight weeks total,

which is probably more business school experience than I don't know, maybe Jeremy has. So like, I think this is a good idea for once. Yeah, he took a Staz Locker business from like $700 a decade. $70 million. Yeah, and in the meantime, Stephanie has decided she is going to host a Friend to Prevention

because she remembers that when she and Brandi were having a feud you know the friends brought them together and they were able to finally squash it. So she thinks she can finally squash it with Leanna DeAndrick because they've had enough time at part which is hilarious because that will never happen. And also that's not what happened on the show. That is not why they squashed it and that is not why they came back together. They came back

together because they got together alone and squashed it alone and cried together. They kept fighting when it was everybody else there, you know, true. But all memory, who needs ya? So then Travis is like, oh, ladies. I feel like every man in Texas talks like that to their wife to like, oh, your girls. You know what girls need to do?

You all need to sit down together and just be frilling and do each other's hand. Drink some wine and take a Xanax. That's how girls solve things. Like a lord. Yeah. So now we hear the sounds of like the Bronx Zoo. It's just like.

Ah! H-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h I'm Which means we're at brand new's house and our first shot at Brandy's house is One of her kids with total priv face. Yes, hilarious Which for those new people priv faces when the priv people on Bravo come over and do your makeup But they don't do your neck So your face is always a different color than the rest of your body. Usually you always have it. Always has it. Most people on Bravo have it these days.

People have these yellow faces and white necks. Although actually I won't even say white necks because it seems to be getting across all races. It's just like yellow face no matter what your race is. We first noticed it, I think, on Potomac. Didn't we with Giselle? Because Giselle wouldn't have... I don't think so.

I don't think... I don't remember where we first noticed it, but it's definitely been a real issue for these women. Yeah. So now the kids have it, and it's hilarious. So she's like roller skating around with, like, Brandy's old cheer cone just abusing the shit out of everybody around her Yeah, and I mean I don't know why that that megaphone was like not immediately thrown into the trash

Like and here's the thing Brandy's just like Like he doesn't like if it were me, I'd be like you put that down You do not put that I'm your I am your father, you know I'd be you put that down right now, you know, but like, man, he just like giggles. Lifted over your head. If you did that to me and just slam it down on top of your head until your head popped out the little thing at the end of your strangling until you're begging me to cut it open, you know, and get you out.

That's how you raise a kid. I would do what they do. What that middle doesn't big business. I would just tire up to a pole. That's what she did to Seth Green in FIO Schwartz. And you know what? It was a great life lesson. So she's, uh, brinkly I think it's a one roller skating around with the

I know no no no no no no running your mistake and brinkly's on the counter dancing. Oh, Ben's favorite being kids on the counter. So, uh, Rami's like, that hurts my ears. Please stop that really hurts my ears. He's like, oh, I don't have to say to you all the time. Oh, yeah. And Bruin just like, I was like, oh, my God, I'm never having children. Ever, ever, ever, ever. Washington, that baby in the sink like a Joava. I mean this family I was cracking up. But you know, a

Bruin was cute and he has now reached, he's now reached the age of like Vicky Gunnvalson grandson, charm where he now goes, bo, bo, bo, say ball, bo, bo, bo, They're trying to get him to scream into the, the megaphone. So he goes, blah. He is so cute. He has like longer hair on the sides and this big,

chubby face. And he looks kind of like, whc fieldsC. Fields, you know, like he looks like an old, old guy in the Christmas carol movies, you know, a Christmas carol like just in a pub. I could just see him in a pub holding a little beer like, oh, you know, the ghost of Christmas present. Yeah, I knew Zyresh. I like it. Yeah, like a little Irish old man, but in a little baby body so cute And you know that the nanny hates these kids because she's just trying to fuck with her brains So the nanny finds Brooklyn and it's like so who do you like in school? She's like I don't like any of the boys there

Gross that hate the boys. She's like oh, yeah Usually when you hate a boy means you like them a lot like you know that it's like yeah, you fucker. You hit a boy means you like them a lot. Like, you know, you know, that it's like, yeah, you fucker. You like a boy. And she's like, no, boys eat their boogers. They're disgusting. She means that means you're in love with them. Uh, so they're going crazy. And Brandy's obviously been inherent makeup for three hours for like her first home scene. So she hasn't had to deal with this.

That's why she's probably all calm. And this Nami looks like she's going to like literally jump off the island head. And of course, guess who's up? My side. Guess who's out there? A rake. A rake. Yeah. I see you. So yeah, Brandi was going to just walked in. They're going fucking crazy. And brandy's like the crumb legs like on the on the they're on the ceiling fan, the toaster oven, like some of them's like singing things in the toaster oven, you know, and that music is playing. Yeah. the toaster oven like some of them's like singing things in the toaster oven you know and that music is playing

Yeah, the kids spinning around in a blender, you know Not an albu barbie Corvette don't play barbie with me Yeah, and Brandy's like god Sometimes she can really be a little shit head. Like, she's like, I don't know if it's her hormones or she's gonna start out flow, but she likes everyone but me. I hate her. I just love Brandy's way of talking about her.

It is hilarious. She is like, okay, my daughter is a brat. And you know what, she doesn't even want to try it. She's like, it's too late. I can't reform her. I've made my mistakes. I just have to deal with it. Yeah. She's like, was I like this? I was like this. You know, it's like total karma. Yeah, exactly. So Brandy is like talking to Brooklyn about something. I don't even really know what, but she's just sort of saying things. And Brandy goes, well, I hope I don't I don't continue to embarrass you. And Brooklyn's like, um, you're just embarrassing yourself mother. And she goes, why do you

look like a clown? She goes, I'm trying to dress like you and Brandy goes, do I look orange? And she, she, no, the kid goes, do I look orange enough? And she says, are you saying I look orange? And she's like, um, yes Which was amazing because it was our first like really self-aware proof-face moment in the history of bravo And also some moment we knew who we were hiring when we need guest hosts when one of us is out of town Brooklyn who would have thought? So then we go to a cemetery where Deandre and D are rolling up.

They're going to go there. They're there to put some flowers on on Deandra's Glenn. Glenn is a D's ax. Glenn's the Simmons father. We hear a backstory about like because the Andras biological father was the one who shot himself and Glenn is one who died of a heart attack. I think his name is Glenn. So they're going, it's been six-year anniversary of his death. They're going, and they leave flowers very nice. And then they sit on a bench to reminisce.

And Deandra's like, you know, he was a nurturing parent, even more so than my mother. He was the one who was there for me. I mean, to be fair, a piece of paper was there for me than my mother. He was the one who was there for me. I mean to be fair a piece of paper was there more for me than my mother Yeah, I rock on the ground is there for me more than my mother mother She's like when he died. I you know mother when he died I just I went into business but I was pen of the funeral. I was I was doing this I was repackaged at Green Medical. I was figuring out what L22 even was gonna be

I was just so busy that I couldn't even grieve. And he's like, see it was that it was just it was I remember thinking I'm gonna be alone. Who else do I have in this entire world? Nobody. Nope, nobody. And just like me, me, me mother. Nope. Can't think of one person. I did like that Hascleaner lady though.. She was pretty good till I think she's still one of my rings and I fired her. Remember when we found that ring behind the toilet at that time, that poor woman? Remember Amelia?

Amelia was great. She was there for me when your father died. But I do remember you did throw yourself into the business. You were so, so busy. You couldn't even come by my office to say hi and fix the TVVCR combo. You were so busy. You arrived arrived you threw yourself into busyness.

That's right. And Dandra is trying to use this to like squeak in a conversation about how she can get more money, which is just so gross dandra. But also mom of the totally knows it's coming and so she's not giving an inch you know. There are so many levels to the game that is being played between these two, like unspoken levels. If you haven't really watched the show before, you probably don't realize all this unspoken sort of jousting that is happening, but if you have watched, if you understand their

dynamic, it is like kind of amazing brilliant television. This is the sort of shit that goes on and like, who's afraid of Virginia Woolf? This is Edward Albe shit that goes on and like who's afraid of Virginia Woolf? This is Edward Albi's shit, you know? So, just how they talk about their relationship. Like she's like, well, you know, what dad was most concerned about, mother is he said that when I die, you and your mother have to be nice to each other

because you're only gonna have each other left. And she's like, yeah, yeah, you told me that every day, which means they were fighting and going for it, going for each other's drugs every day. which means they were fighting and going for it, going for each other's throat every day. And he's like, listen, you guys, I'm not going to be here to you. Yes.

Literally, stop bullets, you know, when you're shooting at each other from across the living room. So that is exactly right. So Deandra says, well, Mother, if he were here and I could talk to him about the decisions I have to make with the company, What would he say for me to do? What would he say? Follow your heart. Follow your heart, Dan. Follow it. Follow your heart, Dan. Follow your heart. Just how you followed your heart and tank the business with your idea to take it off of Christian television. Follow your heart and sell it back to your

mother. Follow your heart. You stand in line with your heart and the second you get right up to that lady in the hair and neck, you say I would love some more soup if I possibly could just keep following that heart right down the soup. I'm only you just follow your heart just the way your heart told you to marry a poor man takes pictures of fly traps. Okay. Follow your heart. So, Danter tells us, I mean, money to keep the business moving forward. I mean, she went on salary, but insisted on 60 grand a year to pay her expenses. Well, that's fine. If we're profitable, but we are not. And guess how much money the company needs to fix itself? Well, that's what they're telling us. Basically, we see Esther, and she says,

to fix itself. Well, that's what they're telling us. Basically, we see Esther and she says, you need $60,000 to sort of like relaunch the green miracle. And funny, D gets $60,000 a year. I wonder where they'll find that $60,000. Yeah. So, yeah, D'Angers like, well, mother, as you may remember when the company hit hard times on account of your leadership, mother, I took a pay cut because that's what daddy would do. That's what daddy would do. And he would want to continue your legacy mother. So maybe you might want to make a sacrifice the way daddy would make us sacrifice other, other daddy, other daddy. And she's like, I know the things you're talking about, because I'm a fairly intelligent person, dandruff, okay. And I know when I saw that company over to you, and she's like, um, there was stipulations, she goes,

there were stipulations, yes, there were stipulations. She's like, well, uh, you know, you had a lot of things in that contract mother, and she's like, oh, you know, you had a lot of things in that contract mother. It's like, oh, only thing I had with the housekeeper. Did you profit clubs? There's the fillers. Did you say the fillers? It sounded like they said the products.

No, the products. The products, you know, I like to get a new Rolls-Ross every six months because you know, you don't want them when they get dirty. It's not as much as that. Um, I have my collection of Fabricet eggs that I need to update every once in a while. And Dan dr. It's like, uh, and the city bank bills, the bills, mother, the city bills. And she's like, oh, that's just the gasoline, Dan dr. The gasoline. I like, uh, whoever saysra, the gasoline. I like that. Whoever says that, the gasoline.

And she's like, and the mom goes, listen, Dandra, I know this is very heart-free. And Mama D does this thing where she blinks her eyes like this, like super fast. Like, where your eyes are trying to clear out an eye, bugger, but it looks like your whole brand is resetting. She's like, Dandra, now listen, I know that we agreed to those things, but I don't need those paid. I got plenty of money. You understand me? I got plenty of money.

Yeah, because basically, Mom would be just like, oh, I see what your game is. You're gonna bring me on TV and then threaten to take away my money, which we agreed I would get no matter what, and make me look like I'm the poor one. Well, I'm not gonna play like, I know, okay, okay, I see. Sure, I will agree to this, but everyone better know I am rich. I am rich and I'm gonna get that like I know okay. Okay. I see sure I will agree to this but everyone better know I am rich I am rich and I'm gonna get that $60,000 off camera. Yeah, and then it's like well I was so nervous to talk to you about it, but I'm better because when I talk to you about it before he threw that face in my head I'm like listen to me Dean

Do you think the S on my forehead? my stupid It's like There is no There's there's no ass Mama D I mean, I know her wig does a little curl, but that's more like a that's more of a It's more of what you call it. So Dilla Yeah, just the S on my forehead looks stupid Smart smart. I'm very smart, Dandra. I'm looks stupid. He's like smart smart. I'm very smart, Sandra.

I'm very smart. And he's like, well, I just don't want you to think I'm taking anything away from you. She goes, oh, you're not taking anything away from me. Yeah. She goes, yeah, then Mama D gets all casual. So she's like, she goes from being like all pissy to being like, when I walked away, you're going, man,

I walked. That's it. When I walked, I walked. That's it, when I walked, I walked. That year is now. And so, Dandra goes, she tells the camera, she's like, what's harder, not succeeding, or knowing that my mother intentionally sent me up to fan. No, no, no, ma'am, you do not get to do that.

You were the vice president of this company for all these years, sitting back in in your mansion and your fucking fancy cars and your jewelry hanging off all over the place trying to pretend your rich and you were the vice president. You don't get to just blame your mother. I say D should just cut her ass off and I want to see her in a one bedroom apartment. That is low to go after your mother on TV like that even though mama did went mo too Mama is low also, but she's the mother. She's allowed to go low. So, uh, so yeah Do you like I've got plenty of money? So you wonder Sammy? Read my lips. I have plenty of money And I don't need that $60,000 a year although it would be nice because you know promises are promises But I don't need the money but I don't need the money I don't need the money. So then Deandra's now crying and and he's like Deandra

How can you be afraid to talk to your mother about things like this? And she's freaking out and Then dandre tells us she's like well, you leave me a pile of shit and I'm angry you because you put me in this situation And however, we're gonna have a good mother of daughter relationship back. She won't say that to her mother, right? So the producer goes, oh, first it comes to my mom of the going, your mother will always have your back, Sandra, always. And then the producer goes, so, Sandra, would you ever be willing to give up your trust so your mother would no longer have financial control over you and Andrew goes? Hmm. Hmm. No.

I have traveled at my mother's feet for 50 fucking years and I'm like, if you got that mother. And I just started cheering. I was like, okay, this season wins. It is so good. Like, if we just focus. If we just focus on Deandra and her mother, we have like a great A season because this shit, well, I just even D is saying, your mother is who will always have your back no matter what. I will always be there for you when we know that she sabotaged Deandra of this day over. I don't think she sabotaged her. I think that she was like, she was finally just saying, let this girl fuck herself. She's gonna try and bearish me year after year on camera,

saying I won't give her the company unit to hers. She wants to make these decisions and stop going on 700 Club. Okay, you want to change the packaging of things? Okay, you want to launch a new product? Okay, here's the results of what you did. You know, I don't think there's anything wrong with that good for her.

I, Deandra, I will always be there for you. Even after you run my legacy into the ground, I will always be there for you. Even after you run my legacy into the ground, I will still be there for you. Even after you purchase an extremely low couch for your living room that I struggle to get off of when I sit down at it, I will be there for you. I will be there for you, Sandra. You know what, I got a ring cam.

And that means when you're at my front door, begging and crying and pleading, I can see you from the cell phone in my bedroom and I will be there for you watching you. Sob at my doorstep. I'll be there. I'll be there. Yeah. Yeah. So then we transition over to Cameron's house where we get some more tricky monical and the trolley potatoes and she's here. It's possible that you'll get play because Blond's hate more fun. Is that what does that what does she saying? I couldn't tell because her she's really having troubles.

She's struggling with this new 50s V-bot thing. And it's like that. I'm the dumb. I bet on the ghost have more fun. Ghost have more fun fun. I'm like boom. Go to have more fun, fun. I'm like, hmm, you're not into it yet, but I'm liking the new style so far. Yeah, I support.

So Cameron is gonna be going on a cruise for Spring Break and so she's picking out outfits so she's talking to her kids. We're so cute. And the theme is tropical. So it's just like helping the kids. Ooh, yeah. So the kids are helping her pack and she's like, should I do why? Genius tropical so you know, it's just like helping it So kids are helping your pack and she's like should I do why because it's tropical

I mean I find it's like a bit of for tropical clothing She's like People go on cruises because they think it's like a budget vacation like you spend $400 and you get everything No, why you take the auto cruise and I find a budget vacation. Mike, you spent $400 and you get everything. No worries. You take the auto cruise and I find a way to spend money. So by the way, no one thinks you've spent $400. It's going to be a budget. I think everyone acknowledges that cruises

are going to be expensive. And you're going to get a camera. The Cameron has no idea where real money even means anymore. It's like from a development. How much is a man? $10? So it's going to possibly be.

Yeah. I mean, everyone thinks that when you go on a cruise, it's going to be like a budget, and you're going to get a painting down of you like our nude, and you're going to find a love of your life. But no, girl, it's not like that at all. So Stephanie calls her. She's like, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, she's like, hi, I'm just packing girl.

Yeah, packing. Packing girl. And so Stephanie is like, so we're going to have a friend of intervention and I want you to know if you could come over and Saturday. Oh, that's so sweet girl. I'm only in town because I'll eat tomorrow morning. So that should be interesting. You're up brave. Girl. Girl. Okay. Girl. Have so much fun. Love you, girl. And immediately it's like ting ting ting ting to call Leanne. But Leanne doesn't need. I was expecting Leanne's phone to be like, leave a message or don't. You get play. I get expecting Leand's phone to be like leave a message or don't you get play

I get like you know to be like something or do one of those or one of those things that's like you know how this works Or like a hello Leand here just kidding stupid Leave a message after the beep unless her name is the intro sims in which case this you got the wrong number And you're on some street non-you Leave a message after the beep unless you are pretty Pretty Jennifer in which case you go fuck yourself or at least have dreamy fuck you again But no, it's like you've got you've reached a not a voice messaging system and she's like girl Hey girl, it's calm girl Just cut off the phone with Stephanie.

Um, I know Stephanie is gonna be inviting you to this. Good boy. It just cuts her all. Also Cameron was saying how she's not upset that she could be missing this friend of mentioned she goes I have no FOMO okay, what whatsoever missing this and if you want to know what FOMO is it's fun of missing Like no camera and she's like oh Ha ha ha ha and this is the thing with Cameron. I don't really ever think she's kidding. She's not she's not really like that Yeah, I think this is I think Cameron is just Cameron Yeah, because we went up to her at the wedding. We're like hey, we do this podcast is weird to say hi to you But we have to say hi to you and she goes

And then she did the sidehead tell and just like squinted and was nodding at us and she's like oh I think I've heard of that That's like oh my god. She hates us. No, no, no, I love her this And then she and then we're like we love you and she's like that's so funny. I love that my god look Quart court. They do a radio block. Quar, Quar. She just looks just like she is. She is amazing.

She looks like she's fucking with you, but I don't think she is. She is a man. The violence, the garage band violence come back into play today. And we're going back to Dandruff's house where Gettie is over. Yes. Kerry comes in to visit Dandruff. And Dandruff's house where Gettie is over. Yes.

Carrie comes in to visit Dandruff and Dandruff's like, I'm sorry, but I know the smell. Jeremy was barbecuing back there and then Carrie goes, oh my God, what happened? I was like, I love her. She's very like already upset. Because they apparently went out and told like 3.30 in the morning.

So they've already been drunk together all night, you know? So we know which side Carrie's landy gone to start. Yes, and Carry tells us that our dandruff tells us they met through friends in Highland Park and she's not to give a fuck when you think about her. She's not typical Island park mother. Yeah, you know, I don't really know what to think at first, but man carries just starts cracking me up this whole time. She's like, You know, I don't really know what to think at first, but man, Carrie's just starts cracking me up this whole time. She's like, what the fuck do you care what people think about you? Do they pay your bills?

They fucked them. Make them die. I'm like, yes, Carrie. Well, the board. Yeah, so Deandra is talking about how she never saw the relationship counselor with Leanne, and she's like still mad about the, like, the $200 rumor that Leanne started last season, even though she has just basically put her mom right on camera and forced her mom to like act like

she has tons of money still, you know. So so so the end was like all fussy about that. Yeah, and then they start talking about Leanne a little bit because Carrie hates Leanne because we said this earlier, she knows Carrie Tupor and she's like I didn't appreciate her making accusations about her husband Mark. I saw Leanne in a restaurant and I went up to her and I told her you're talking about the vios. I'm sure it wasn't quite as succinct as that. Well Leanne was probably like you are hilarious you want to sit down have a drink bitch I don't know who you are but you're great so then we um we then go to carry at home uh where she also is packing for spring break and we meet her husband um Eduardo and uh carry is like spending issues my first

language but people say I have an accent when I speak English but I think I've lost it or don't you? So her husband's like really nice easygoing. He's like so none of the dads are going on this mother-daughter trip huh? I hope you guys have fun. She's like listen I know how to pack with a husband but how do you pack with a teenager? And she seems like she's about to say like you have to be a sex easy fucking teenager and he's like you do it more conservatively. He's like oh okay he's so hard okay so conservative so like bikini right string like I'm here so like she can't even speak English but he's like it's hard to get it cuz it's an accent but also this is the same time I know if I feel like I don't know I think I'm just gonna be a mess for a little bit

Yeah, it's gonna take time. We're gonna have to practice a whole lot of precious time So teach like time when we both when we met we both been married already, but chemistry You know we would we would have sex in the bathroom, but after 10 years sexy time not the same. Yeah, I mean Yes, but you know what I get pregnant like oh like you look at me. I get pregnant. I'm like true Mexican You know we just have babies. You know, I'm saying like I was telling my good friend teens the more. Oh, oh, sorry teens I thought I was safe to watch TV again Okay, turns to what I thought it was safe to watch TV again. He's completely at home solving on her couch. So they sort of have a Brady Bunch situation because Carrie has kids and I think that Eduardo

has kids and they have a daughter together, etc. To get the girl. So they have an older daughter. Carrie's older daughter was her older daughter daughter Olivia? Was that their joint daughter? One of them. I don't care about your kids, you know what I mean? I just wrote kid. Yeah, this kid is just like mad at her mom.

So, mom, I can't believe you want to wear that. No, it's awful mom. Yeah, I wrote Little Monster, because she's like another kid in teenage mode. She's like, mom, you're wearing that bikini seriously, mom? No. And she goes, well, no, before I got my, you know, she goes, your boobs.

Your boobs, huh, mom? Yeah. So, Kerry goes, I wish there was like an agency that would just like, take them away when they become teenagers. And you can go back and like pick them up when they become 22. I'm like, it's called boarding school in college. Yeah, no kidding. Get on it, ladies.

It's called military school. Call Dr. Phil and have a white van show up and take that little brat away. Seriously. So then we go over to staff and Brandy comes over. And then we get another, I'm not falling for this again show, okay? Because then we get another, oh, you know,

Leanne and I are actually good now. We just decided to put all our stuff aside and be friends again I was like oh Brandy I've fallen for this before you know what I support it and the reason why is Because I have this theory about feuding on bravo. Okay, you have a season where you have a falling out So the beginning your friends about the end you have a by the end you hate each other You then have a season of the feud where you hate each other all season long and then and then it's over, right? And if you have if you have another season of the feud We all get tired. It's like what we saw in Orange County. It's what we saw on some other shows So I think that like Leanne and Brandy they're doing it just right, you know

They had a fall and they have a feud like it can't go on another season, right? Leanne's going to go on another season. I've really do like the reset. Yeah. You always have to have a recess that way they can feud again next season. Like it's, it's good. You need to have the rhythm. Okay.

So they are like doing it just right. I also last time they had this, this truce was when Brandy was fighting with Stephanie. And so she was nice to Leanne, but then she was when Brandy was fighting with Stephanie and so she was nice to Leanne, but then she was going behind Leanne's back and telling everybody all this stuff that Leanne was telling her in privacy. And that's when we had that season of, they're just hands. Exactly. But they work quite well. Yeah. So let Leanne fall into the trap again, let Leanne say some stupid shit, Brandy tell everyone and then fight next season. It just it just yeah It's perfect

But it also means though that Leanne and Deandra have to get back on good terms for next season too Because we can't have another season of Leanne and Deandra fighting. That's like it doesn't work Just right now it's working because they go This season it works. Oh yeah, but next season they won't work Yeah, I'm with you, but yeah, I like it. Okay, so it's a reset. So I don't know that I'm falling for it, but I'm liking it so far. I'm fine. So totally fine. They've decided to be friends and then Sandra shows up and she's just typical Deandra like

haha haha Well, hi! This is great. See y'all. Wow, look at this. We're here. I'm the Shannon Bedorba. I know. Like that. Weird. I turned into Shannon Bedor for a second, she does have that weird nervous energy like, oh, here we go again. I'm happy. I'm ready. You know, I'm a bigger person mother. You know, you know what? Because you know what laughs about trusting people as he in trust, as he in life. Can I have access to my trust now? No. Okay. But she's

basically like, if apologizing again is what it takes to clear the slate then I'll do it. I'll do it I'll do it, you know D'andre likes to think that Leanne is the one always giving like the barbs But her being like a apologizing again like that is the barb right there like I will do it again because I am the bigger person Again as usual Yeah, so Leanne shows up wearing red zebra pants Which I think is a nod to like,

see, super, it's can change your stripes. Bitch! Ha, ha, ha, Prosh gave me these. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, Prosh gave me these, because I introduced her to the mouse, and mouse is taco stand-out or in town.

Bitch. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, hauckles. Muckles crafting store, as you loved it. So, Leanne and Deandra are totally frosty to each other. Stephanie is like, they're twinning and they don't even realize it. They have the same hair. I mean, it's meant to be sort of like Travis cheating on me. He better not. Oh my god. He will fash you through.

So, yeah. So, Dandras, the only one who eats, which is like a total power move, right? Dandruff's like, I will have a devil deck from Costco. Anyone have anything? Say mother. I prefer to shop at Sam's Club, but that's just me. I know Sam. I put him together with wholesale Crash like Sam's club to now so That's why I have so many free gigantic carts in my front lawn holding plants Listen when people say I give out BJ's it's true because I enjoy BJ's wholesale club, too So

So it's really awkward. It's definitely like, well, just meeting shall come to work. Okay, so, well, you're returning 50 and you're getting married. So, come on, talk. And Liam's like, well, I feel a lot of hurt. I feel hurt is what I feel. I lost my family. That is how I feel. I've lost my family again. The station wagon is just driven away. I've got grandma's heel in my head. That's where I'm at. Have you ever gotten onto the swings and going around in the circle, at the circle, and you're like, there's my mom. There's my mom.

Then all of a sudden, mom's not there and you're going around and around. I'm like, I feel dizzy. I can't find my family. That's how I feel right now. I'm off the swings to it. I think I'm out I feel dizzy. I can't find my family. That's how I feel right now. I'm off the swing set. I think I'm out puke and I can't find my family. And so, Dan just like, and I said, I am sorry in November. And I left there thinking that was it. But then I get to my hotel room after the reunion. And Rich is sending nasty text messages to my husband. And you want to, you want to read it? Let's read it. So it points it out to us. At which point, it's like, oh my god,

I did not see this coming. This is amazing. I was just like, oh, oh, oh, because I watched this a little bit before you and I was like, I want to text Ronnie. I don't think I texted you about this, right? Did I text you about this part? No, and I knew I should,

you told me you were starting to watch it. And I was like, I should start to, but I was watching Flipper Flop, Nashville. No, fake, fake, fake, and I knew I should you told me you were starting to watch it and I was like I should start to you But I was watching flip or flop Nash, no fake big big and I couldn't do it But then I couldn't text you either because I was texting you like oh my god, mom a D But you're like high that was like 45 minutes. No, I think at that point I had I went to sleep early last night Actually, I think I've actually gone to sleep believe it or not, but it was good. It was so good I was squeaking so we now like at long last the rich we always knew we could have messy rich messy messy rich so perfect so

perfect. Well listen when you're a girl like Leanne and live you still can marry messy queen even if he's straight. Yeah okay and rich it can marry a messy queen even if he's straight. Yeah. And Rich can be a messy queen, so this was so good. I didn't write down the whole text. I wrote it down. Of course I did. I wrote it down.

Of course I did. I wrote it down. Of course I did. I wrote it down. Of course I did. I wrote it down. Of course I did. I wrote it down.

Of course I did. Of course I did. Of course I did. Of course I did. Of course I did. Of course I did. Of course I did. Of course I did. Of course I did. I sent the photo when he texted Jeremy after you showed your true colors at the reunion shoot in New York City And I'm keeping my word. So it's like this like the setup and then this is what he had texted I'm just being a good neighbor by sending you this text. I could just imagine rich like virtually just like laughing and patting Dandra on the shoulder. It's a long good phone. Anyway, here's the text I sent your husband

Yeah, I am going to tell D Deandra all about pretty Jessica. She's everything Deandra isn't. I didn't want you bro because I usually have discretion but I will not tolerate the paceless BS that your waffles spoon about me. Rich. Oh my god. So apparently Jeremy is really cotton affair. Everybody's having an affair in this tab, basically. Yeah, and basically in our heads. Basically, there's someone named Pretty Jessica. Some of the, they call it Pretty Jessica

that maybe I guess Rich and Jeremy talked about it and Rich was not, Rich was supposed to hold on to the secret. But since the Andrec he kept on saying that Rich was cheating, Rich is like, fuck, I'm gonna get dirty too. So he took the texit this stuff. And I guess, I guess Jeremy said that pretty Jessica is everything that Teandra isn't. I don't know. Yep, I don't know. But Dan was like, there is no way on earth.

My husband is having an affair with any woman named Jessica or Margaretourney or Fate or Ford or Ramona or Judy or Marissa tome or Since getting really specific now just like fight done away Jessica Fletcher nobody. I'm telling you, nobody. But I'm not wondering how much she really does believe it because she was so freaking out on Jeremy and their first scene together. You know, she looked like she had been crying and all that stuff. And Jeremy looked like you. And Jeremy looked like he had just gone through like about three months of having to repair a relationship with his wife.

Literally being roasted. Yeah, about pretty Jessica. I want to know about pretty with his wife. Literally being roasted. Yeah, about pretty Jessica. I want to know about pretty Jessica so badly. Like I just love the idea of pretty Jessica. I feel like this is the best, the best new name since Becky with the good hair. It's like now pretty Jessica. Pretty Jessica.

Happy birthday, Beyonce. Yeah, so she's like, so obviously we weren't maybe forward, Leanne. I'm like, well, you don't get to just come out. Like what did Leanne do to you last year? She said you shouldn't be outspending all that money when you don't have 200. That's not nice. I get that. She said that. Leanne, but you said that Rich was having an affair and told everybody that she was having an affair. So like, what did you really, Wait, let's remember what happened,

which is that DeGandra was hectoring Leanne about the wedding and saying that she doesn't think that Leanne really wants to get married because she knows issues, da da da da da da da da da da da da. And then Leanne, probably partially in passive aggressive retaliation tells Carrie, you know what? Like, it's weird because DeGandra just told me she doesn't have a lot of money left and she's spending money And I'm a little concerned so that of course gets asked then Deandra gets furious and starts telling everyone that

Rich has been cheating so this is sort of the backstory of their messiness Which I love they're both messy and not they're one of them will ever apologize, right? So she's like uh Well apparently you didn't get over it we weren't moving forward and she's you accused my husband of to or my fiance of cheating on me she's I didn't accuse him I asked a question so Leigh Ann goes riches a wire that germine was having an affair with a girl named Jessica pretty Jessica and germine called me a fucking snake on social media okay Rich can threaten all he wants that's rich not me yeah and What's her about in the stand dress like what it's very duplicitous of you because you called out Carrie about her marriage But then when I do it to you out of concern you say that I can't do that

But you'd been in the same position. So, did you please say tis? I'm like, that was a storyline from like, boom, I mean, come on. Emily, I was like, yes. And I learned my lesson two years earlier, and I still, she does that church thing where she's like, I still feel guilty every day. My life, I feel guilty about that.

I'm like, while, and why? Why do these words have to spew out of you? It's like every day the guilt has moved me up and down, going to circles. I'm on like a guilty go round. And I can't get off because I don't have tickets for another ride. And if I get off of there, I'm going to walk around looking for a blah, blah, blah. Now I'm like, OK, I can't get off because I don't have tickets for another ride. If I get off of there, I'm gonna walk around looking for a blah blah blah.

Now I'm like, okay, I can't calm down over there again. Oh, yeah, she's like, yeah, she basically is like, I still feel bad when people bring up the mark, my pique, because some of my friends, so I'm getting a blow job at the roundup. I feel bad that I said that. But do I think the end rough feels guilty? Because I don't think she does.

So she's like, you know, look at you, Dandra. You're stands, you're posture, you're face. I mean, everything Apache, you're so far above me, aren't you? And you are, you're better, you're rich, you're pretty, you're better you're rich you're pretty you're everything you've got my hair you've got my heavier version of my hair and Stephanie goes oh guys you're both amazing I don't think they were no so just piping in and say man you always say good you always have to go below the belt in your commentary I'm just trying to listen to what you're saying. I was going below the belt when I'm telling you you're better than everybody who ever

WOLF they are By the way, I have to say so this is the reason why Leanne is a fan favorite what what is happening to you? My face what happened to your face if you're watching this crap is on the map for people who are needed to a face just now and it is so bizarre no now his face is missing now just how you doing he's invisible man I'm the invisible man probably just go back to normal I'm just gonna stay green I'm just gonna stay green oh it isn't easy green miracle so um so here's no I was just gonna stay green. I'm just gonna stay green. Oh, it isn't easy. Green miracle. So, um, uh, so here's, no, I was just gonna like,

pontificate for a second for why Leanne is always the fan favorite is because like, Leanne, we're just watching the way she acts in her interviews. She just knows how to ham it up for camera, right? Like, she knows how to bring in that element of camp. So, like, even in those moments where Leanne is wrong, which is probably like a lot, you just can't help but be on her side because she doesn't just say like,

she doesn't just say things like, I still feel guilty, but I don't think the answer does. She's like, I feel guilty. And I don't think she does. She is so, she's so over the top. I mean how do you like that's how it's done? You know Kyle Richards with you just simple ring because the Covages would go you know I just I feel like I feel guilty and I don't think she does no Kyle no Yeah, what to learn beyond does everything I'm the direct towards college

Richards the same other just sniping at each other because she's like, oh, no, you're just attacking me and saying that I like I'm better than everything. No, no, no, no, no, no, she's like, it's I'm trying and she goes, I just came here wanting to make this better. Okay, Leigh-Anne and Leigh-Anne is like, wow, what do you want to make it better? Yeah, because it's the right thing to do. We had a pass.

And then Leigh-Anne goes, what was our pass? Liam suddenly become a dead person. Where she's like being the therapist. She's like saying it's common she can't just to make Tandra mad. Yeah, yeah, so she's like, she's like, what was our pass? Because last time I checked, my pass involved a lot of climbing up rope ladders that spin around and drop you off onto a floaty thing Yeah, I know one guys that did it. Sorry and she's saying really calm and the ender's like come on

But do you see the way you're yelling look at that? I'm also that animosity you've got go in there right now So do you understand just like okay? You called me smug you call me, you go, just, whatever it is, you just said a minute ago and then goes, I didn't say any of those things, which is hilarious because she didn't say it. But Deandra's like, no, I say it like whatever you say. That's what I say. So look, I apologize about the $200 comment and you said that was a BS apology. Well, okay, then I'm gonna take what you say and I'm gonna believe it

because I am here to make amends. Okay. Yeah. And by the way, Brandy and Stephanie are just like watching with this look on their face like, we're totally gonna talk about this afterwards, right? We're totally gonna drink wine and laugh about how we're taking a seat in the bathroom right now, right?

Oh, and Dan just like, well, I will reiterate the fact that I'm sorry for her, and I want that off of my spirit and my soul because it does method of serve me going forward. Do you have $90,000? That would be great. Hey, Langos, no, it doesn't, and it did not serve you then. And Dan just like, that kind of comma is not appreciated. And then lands like, no, I'm just saying,

it did not serve you well, just as it did not serve me while to talk about Carrie's husband, who may or may not be gay, bring it back, bring it back. Yeah, I'm Brandy's like, to be fair, I used to be a cheerleader and can still fit in the uniform,

so we should just all get along. Dinger goes, you know, I try to give you a little grace. Okay, something that my mother never gave me, mother. And you said, me in the back once again, once again. Lance, like, well, she goes, what do I need to do to make us be able to move forward? Are we going to change our packaging and move on? Or are we going to stay in a horrible jar that nobody wants to buy? I'm like, I don't need you to do anything just be you and then we need some time between the pain and new

Experiences and that's what's moving on. Yeah, exactly. I kind of looks inside like did I say the right thing? Can I fucking go home now exactly because Leon is not having any of this. So Deandra was like, I pledge allegiance to the Leigh Ann of the United Dialis of America and to the Green Maricle for which it stands, one facial cream under God, indivisible by L22, injustice and mother. And now I need nine to went, that's him. Because I want you to be, I just want you to be happy, and after you get married, I want you to be so happy like you and me and I are. And Titan lands like Tom is literally the slowest thing and the fastest to deliver.

It's like what? And so they make a toast to the future but they hate they visibly hate each other's guts and this season looks like it's going to be great. Because Leon goes, I've heard all the words I need to hear out of this mouth and you know what I haven't seen? Actions. Just baby staves. Just a, give me an inch. Give me an inch. That way I can stamp you in the neck with an half. Yeah. Well, we know it's been a perfect day of housewives recapping because the leaf blower is now outside my door. I mean, could we have a better sign that this is going to be a great thing? I don't think so. Well, you guys. Everybody, thanks for dawning us.

Little fun for us, guys. I know. Please go vote for us at the podcast. What was the podcast awards dot com? Podcast awards dot com. And, and I'm gonna use us embed.

I want to buy some tickets to our shows. We are we are running out of some of tickets in several places, which is really super cool. Thank you guys. And, of course, stay tuned. Definitely on Tuesday when we have all our cool. Thank you guys. And, um, of course, uh, stay tuned, uh, definitely on Tuesday when we have all our Denver details for you guys. Yeah. We'll be back next week and guess what else is back next week, Ben? Mary's medicine.

Mary's medicine. She's food liby. Mary Demedison comes back Sunday. Yes, everyone. And for the season finale, we've got a lot. Yeah. Uh, thank you, everyone. And we will season finale, we've got a lot. Yeah. Thank you, everyone. And we will talk to you all Monday. Next time, Monday. Bye.

Bye. Hey, prime members. You can listen to Watcher Crappens ad free on Amazon Music. Download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen ad free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey. Or you can listen ad-free with Wondry Plus and Apple podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey.