Watch What Crappens - RHOD: Panties in a Bunch

Episode Date: February 4, 2021

This week on Real Housewives of Dallas, the day trip to Grapevine, TX, results in more fighting, more drunkenness, and more Kary being awful. In other words, it was hilarious!Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music,

or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch what crap is watch what crap is Who cares what happens when there's so much that crap is Who's the crap is Who's the crap is Who's the crap is Watch what crap is Who cares what happens when there's so much that crap is Who's the crap is Who cares what happens when they're so happy? What happens if we run to the world? What happens if we run to the world?

Kids, what happens when they're so much that happens? Hello and welcome to Watch Our Crappins, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to watch. I'm Ben Mandelker, can also catch me on the Game Brain podcast and can watch The Real House where there's a kitchen island and Joining me is the wonderful and hilarious my favorite. It's Ronnie Karrum. What's up Ronnie? Well, how B.

Ha You excited to talk some real housewives of Dallas today. Oh, I sure am. I hope Tiffany cries about you know how hard it is to please her parents sure am. I hope Tiffany cries about, you know, how hard it is to please her parents. Oh, yes, yes. Well, yes, what you're in luck. That's what's gonna happen. That will be happening. Yay. Yay. So, yeah, Real House was a Dallas. We got nothing to talk about on the top of the show, right? There's nothing to prove. We have nothing to prove. Nice. Yeah, we're not gonna sit here and plug you for five minutes, everybody. I won't say one thing. I will say one thing in case people missed it from our previous episodes. Just the schedule for this week is that we will be recapping Salt Lake City tomorrow, Thursday, and then Friday will be Southern Charm, and then the summer house season premiere will

be on Monday. There will be no Atlanta because Atlanta is on break because of the Super Bowl. So that's the schedule for the next few days. Wow. Yeah, so you're going to get two Salt Lake cities this week and we get to do it twice this week. Exciting. And guess what? It's going to be a crap and on demand episode. So this week crap and on demand will be Salt Lake City and whatever else we have coming up. What's the Southern charm, the final episode of Southern Charm, who knows how long Southern Charm is even gonna be in this formation. Do you know that it's gonna be the final episode

or do you think I think it's gonna be, I suspect it's gonna be a three episode reunion because I feel like in the previews previews it looked like they didn't even broached the racism stuff for this coming up episode but then again Southern Charm so you know yeah I never know what they're gonna broach at all actually um so here we go with some real housewives of Daily and Tony we open where we ended last week in the creepy echoey wine barn where no housewives should ever be allowed to go again. Yeah, like this was it was very scary in there. I felt like it was supposed to be like Where someone gets murdered, but then the murderer walked in and was like, oh, you know what?

I think I'm done murdering. I don't think I want to deal with these people. I'm just gonna... I'm a living honest life now. Yeah, that hostess lady. She's probably... they're probably so exhausting. She's like, my head hurts now from listening to all those ladies yelling in echoes. So, I'm not gonna murder anybody today. Okay, I'm taking the nap. Echo yelling is intense. So, Carrie and Deandra are still fighting, and Carrie is like, well tonight we're celebrating Brandy so stop complaining about your work.

Well you complain about every little thing Carrie, you do, you do. Yeah I did this whole thing to celebrate Carrie. So you can stop complaining about your work. You're the one complaining, you complain about everything. I'm not complaining, I'm just saying what you did wrong Come on And then Pamela comes by with her wine and she goes well, you know what the best day of the week to drink wine is The day that ends the letter. Why I'm Pamela. I'll be your hostess for the evening

I don't want to refill of this turpentine Anyone but I love that they have so little respect for Pamela that they don't even let her finish She goes you know what the best day to drink wine is and they go every day. She's oh well. Yeah, every day that ends with a Y. Thanks. Thanks for stepping on my joke there. Thanks guys Not gonna murder you now. I'm head hurts By the way, I just had a huge sneeze. Please tell me my meat button worked. Did it work? It did. Oh, good. Got worried there for a second. So Stephanie's like, so everybody went, Randy and I first became friends and Randy introduced me to the panty game. So we do this game for weddings and we do it for

like birthdays and we do it for like poop days, which is like days that we poop, which is you know like Every day that ends in a while. That's how to do it Pamela nailed it. No, they're Pamela So we are gonna play a Panne game and everyone decorates a pair of panties and it represents the guest's honor and then Brandy is a guest who decorated which pair of panties. So now we go to whose panties I guess who decorated which pair of panties? So now we go to whose panties is it? The watch what happens live team has taken over Dallas basically, pretty much.

So the first one is some panties that have like three little fish on them. And that's me, it's Carrie, oh, fishy, fishy, fishy. And in my mind, I'm thinking, okay, Carrie, you are, so you sell jewelry your sort of in an artistic feel tradesman crafts person This is the best you could do like you didn't even put any jewels on your thing like you just like like took a sharpie and Etched in three fish on the panties

Because I did it because in Mexico I said I will eat Brandy's fishy because I love rock doing the fish remember that I said I like raw fish that's how the host is be a host is that yeah I'm Brandy guesses her and next up are granny panties and there's fire on the crotch and then there's poop on the back and in like glitter lettering it says something like landing strip or something I believe And again last year in Mexico, Dan Drew talked about not having a late or having a late strip and Brady looked at it and said It's not a full landing strip. It's a full airport

landing strip, it's a full airport. Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!

Segwayed into a lawnmower there. So then, yes, that's the Andrus, she guesses that. The next one that comes up is sort of like a G string, not G string, but it's just like very, it's like black lingerie. It looks like a garter bell, but there actually is a barely discernible string that would go up into your crotch and has these puffy puffy things attached to it and everything and it's black and Brandy goes I feel like this is screaming Cameron and Cameron Cameron gives that face like Like what sort of slut does she think I am

Hmm Like what sort of slut does she think I am I know that'll come up again Yeah, Tiffany's like there's her mind like Dandruff's like well camera's the process She mentioned Cameron putting clip rubbing pearls on there And Tiffany's like yeah when she walks around in these she's really gonna feel sexy and just laugh to herself So then Brady opens the next one and she's like, oh no, these are definitely Cameron because they're like Mormon underwear, you know.

They were branded with Sparkle Dog. Sparkle Dog. The global expo. So it's funny because every pair of panties gets like a moment and they talk about it and why it is what it is. And then they bring up Gens and it's like, Gens, and it just goes the next one. Just skip right over Gens.

I just put Gens, I assume we're lame. And then she opens the next one and there's all this hair coming out of the underwear. And she's like, oh my God, this one must be Stephanie. And she's written on the back, no TP for my bung-hole yo. Ha, ha, ha, ha. And then she's put like a strip of poop on the butt. Yeah, so cute. The game is over.

And now they're all back to like having fun. So now Carrie does that thing where you've just been fighting with someone. And then you think that you can make it go away by doing something really sweet. So she like rest her head on Deandra's shoulder and goes, my little sister, notice I did not say hostess, be a sister, be a sister. Be a sister, come on. Oh Deandra, you're doing such a great job, my little sister. And Tiffany's like, isn't she older than you? The Andra's like, one year, this one year. Okay, because it depends on the night with the Andra.

And the Andra's like, well, you took your prize on your birthday. She's like, oh, okay, you know what? Who do I need to call to apologize? Okay, because I don't even remember my birthday. It was so crazy! So much tequila. And Tiffany's like, you're mean to apologize to me for pitching me in the pool with my clothes on. Massive. Oh, well, you know, I'm all about helping people get loose, you know, that's what I do. And Tiffany's like, um, there's a difference between helping someone and pushing them into the pool when

they're fully dressed in their very expensive clothing that their mother told them to buy. Oh, you keep talking about the same thing over and over again. I thought we were over it. I thought we were over it. Let's go girl. Like, yeah, she's the one. You're the one who brought up your damn 50th.

Who do you need to call to apologize on your 50th birthday? Again, we get it, you're 50. And it's such the typical response from the aggressor to be like, oh, oh, come on. Oh, you always bring it up. You always bring it up. It's like that's because you're the one who,

she was the one who was on the receiving end of your stupidity. That's why, that's why she's bringing of your stupidity. That's why that's why she's bringing it up You don't get to tell her that she's bringing it up too much. She's literally brought it up two times now. That's all and tips like Plus if you have like a job and kids you can't just like a party like that She's like well, you said you wanted to let loose and it's a situation and you wanted to help with your situation So I try to help youulz and let the situation and you wanted to help with your situation, so I tried to help you. Yeah, and she's basically like Tiffany's like, yeah, but when you have a full-time job

and you've got kids, you just can't really get shit face basically in the middle of the week. And she's like, oh, well, that's why the next day you plan, do you know what you take the next day? Do you recover? And she's like, I don't have that luxury. She's like, you don't? She was like, I work five days a week, okay? And Carrie's like, I don't have that luxury. She's like, you don't? She was like, I work five days a week, okay?

And Carrie's like, mad at her. She's like, oh really, you don't? Like the first person in America who's mad at someone in the medical profession during a pandemic for working. Like, oh really? Like what part of coronavirus pandemic do you not understand? Not that that's why Tiffany is there,

but it's kind of like, it just as a reminder that our medical professionals are working really hard right now. Yeah, especially during this time, Kerry sucks. And Kerry's like, oh really, she's trying to gather. So she's like, oh really? She don't work tomorrow then? Just now actually, because it's my day off, and then it goes A boom! Hit the Bravo boom And Tiffany's like, Is this a stay-at-home mom thing versus a working mom thing? I mean, I already feel guilty. I'm taking away time for my family. So like, and when she the judge me.

And then Deandra Chimes in, whether... She is a doctor. She is going into an operating room every single day in applying L22 onto people's faces and making them young again L22 on sale now. I'm not good morning. Okay. Oh Dandro's so pink dramatic She's in charge of whether people live or die as man Maddie's magic at all. She's like true. It's a very dramatic. I am not being dramatic. I'm saying is that all of humanity rest on the shoulders of Dr. Tiffany. Okay? No, I know, but you gotta get a balance and check, but you need to stop harassing her about what she drinks all the time.

Just like you're harassing me right now about why I didn't make chief plays for Brady's birthday. I have to say and I love the way that Deandra like moved that over to the chief's plate situation. Also, in retrospect, thinking about it now, who is caring to say that Tiffany is always bringing it up all the time? Oh, you got pushed into pool. When Carrie is been complaining about the frickin' tequila shots all day long, and like how many times have we heard about the Deandra having too much stuff in her car

on the way back from the drug show? Like the fact that we even know about this drunk show drama shows that Carrie's complained about it a lot. Yeah, let's carry. So Cameron's like, um, Walt, Tyff asked me to take a shot in Dumsom.

Okay, and then you know what? You were the one asking me to take a shot that day, and you called me Chewface. And Gary's like, yeah, oh, you know it, by the way, Tiffany, you're too face, by the way. Okay. And Tiffany's like, um, now, because two faces, when you say one thing to one person and another thing to another person It's contradictory like you just said things were okay, but not okay I mean at least call things what they are Correctly and carry trust to the oh sorry on Mexican and she goes um, sorry. I'm Chinese whatever

Oh, well English isn't my first language. Well, Chinese is my first language. What does this have to do with it? Yeah, like you will not like carry, like just get off the hook with that. Yeah, I'm pretty sure you're correct with me. Yeah, well I would correct you in English or Swedish or German or Japanese, what's your point? And she tells us, I don't care where she's from from like maybe that trick works with the other ladies in the group But it ain't come work with me

The only thing that I have to say to you and then I'm done Is that you got mod at me when I call dandra COVID girl and then you did it right to Prandi Choose your horse carefully And we get a clip of that of course and then Carrie is like, oh yeah, and we start hang around with her even when she runs around with all these COVID patients. So COVID girl is actually you by the way situation.

I love that's that really did not come from a place of healing. I like it. It's like it's like everyone to be ashamed. It should be you because you're around those gross COVID people all day long Just helping them to maybe live Do helping people stay alive The girl is coming from inside the house. It's you Tiffany. It's definitely like oh, carry Well, I think what you saying is I have had the most exposure and you are correct

Yes, and we're okay to be with you here with you. So we don't shame you about that My god, she goes thank you so much. Thank you from the bottom of my heart Carrie. Thank you I love when people say things like and we're not jamming you for that as they are actively shaming her like the people say things like, and we're not jamming you for that as they are actively shaming her. The actual sentence is a shaming sentence. Like, they're acting as if she has 10 arms and they are being such saints for hanging out with her. When she's probably the one who is, at the hospital, I guarantee her protocols are 10 times safer

than anything Carrie is doing when she's like, you know, being off on the side of the road or something. I don't know why God like you're saving the lady who's literally saving lives you fucking idiot. Stephanie's like, well, there's like quite a lot of things about Carrie's life that aren't where, you know, she wants them to be. And you know, she's always a little in a bull in a china shop, but she's like five bulls in a china shop. No pun intended to Mexicans and bullfiving or Chinese people in china shops.

Can we shut the underwear me again? Carrie, you're giving Tiffany a very hard time. I'm not giving a hard time, you bitch. Yes you are, you bitch. Why don't you even have to talk about- oh she's a doctor! A-chzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz week and the hard day and the hard night and the new hard morning and you're always traumatic every single time you know every time I talk to you. Technically I had a hard night and a good morning just want to put that out there. Thank you. That was you said that morning.

You only said it later after other days that it was a good morning but I'm sure you complained that morning too. So at the end you're like, and you're not dramatic. I am or king. So it's like, and you have three, you have three that are grown and one child that is 12 that's under your care and the rest you can do, whatever they want to do. You have no clue, I'm not dramatic, but you have no clue. It's like, I do and Brandy's like stop stop A Boom

And I'm just like everybody stop I mean I know this world is crazy right now And we can't control it But we can control each other Let us just talk peacefully And Karen's like um that's what we're doing. Okay. Thank you for reciting what you learned in group therapy. But it was very nice, but it's not gonna work. So bring it. We're fighting. We're fighting. We're friends and

supposed to be supporting each other. And we're just we're faster and evil and I can't do it anymore. And Cameron just has that like her big old Cameron nod like mmm I wish someone had said this before someone had forced a chicken foot in my face insulting all of China in the process. mmm to be fair if I have no idea what you're going through in a hospital and it's not fair to be the herb over Oh really, we all have different stresses. I'm dealing with the stress of my daughter

Maybe committing suicide. What about that? And I'm like, oh wow. I was like that. I was like, okay, that is a 100% very legitimate stress That is totally true, but it's also kind of gross, like using that, like weaponizing that in this stupid argument right now, like trying to like, one up with that was kind of gross to me. That's disgusting.

One, even putting that out there to everybody with, you know, about your daughter is not cool. And to put it out there to win a stupid argument on wine day is really fucking gross, Carrie. Oh my god. When you're trying to want up someone who is like, uh, like on the front lines of a pandemic, I mean, people working in these hospitals in the entire medical field in general, but my understanding is people who are working these hospitals, they are, they are facing like long hours, under supplied,

under staffed, under everything, you know, doctors are committing suicide, nurses, et cetera, et cetera. And it's like, this is a high stress, high intensity environment. I mean, and she is around COVID patients all day long. That to be just like that close from the pandemic, every single day is gotta just be absolutely harrowing and It's not to take away from what Carrie is feeling but also like let's try not to one up that that's like really I just don't think that's like I don't think it's gross

She's a fucking disgusting shithead, okay, that's my note So she's like oh really? Oh, is it less stress than what she's going through? Because less knock on Pete here with the stress levels. I'm like, that's exactly what you're doing. Just trying to compete with stress. Gosh, she sucks. And Brandy's like, oh, and then who the fuck? Oh, that ain't about your daughter. Sorry.

Sorry to interrupt. It wasn't a competition about stress levels. If anything, it was Tiffany explaining why she didn't want to be thrown in the pool by you and why I had an impact. It's because she's working really, really hard right now because she's going on and like give her an ounce of,

like give her an ounce or credit or something here. And so for her to come back to me, like, oh, I don't have my own stress, I don't have my own stress, you may have your own stress, but that has nothing to do with why you pushed Tiffany into the pool. You cannot say the stress you're feeling with your daughter, actually, maybe you could, maybe on some psychological level, you could say

that. I think probably the stress with her daughter may have been why she blacked out at that party, but like, this is not about Carrie. This is about what happened to Tiffany getting thrown into a pool. And it's hilarious that I'm now this fired up about it. Yeah, Carrie sucks. now this fired up about it. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, someday, parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful take on parenting. But is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest

and insightful take on parenting. Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brown-Oller, we will be your resident, not so expert experts. Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding, and thinking. Oh yeah, I have absolutely been there. We'll talk about what went right and wrong.

What would we do differently? And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone. So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wonder E app. So, Brandy's like, I didn't know that about your daughter.

She said exactly, you didn't know. And she's like, but don't think we're not here for you. And she's like, I know sweetie, but it's your birthday. And we had a fun. And it shouldn't be you did this. And you did this. It shouldn't be dramatic like this. You started this whole fight, Carrie. And she's like, it's the last thing I wanted to do. And it just came out of my frustration,

because I'm so tired of people saying their life is harder than mine. I mean, come on. And then Deandra does the classic housewives thing where she then turns this into, like, she makes herself the victim out of this. She goes, you know what, you have been overly sensitive and you know what, the reason why?

Like, we didn't know why, because you have not been shared a single thing of what's going on in your life. I have been left out on the nerve. It's like, Deandra, this is also, this is, no, you were not the victim here, okay. She didn't, she's not obligated to share this stuff about her daughter with you, even as terrible as Carey is, she's not obligated to.

And Stephanie's like, but she just did. So could we support her now? And Demtler's like, I'm going to the restroom. And so Tiffany goes to the bathroom with her. And it looked like Kerry was drinking from a shaker, like a martini shaker, but then I realized they just brought in their own yeti things. To the point of place. So, Carrie is complaining about her, you know, with the table, but then Tiffany's like, you're being a good hostess. Now I guess I'm a brandy and apology

because I was not cool to like find at the table. I'm like, oh no. Yeah. And then Cameron and Carrie take this moment to grab Captain Brandy and they just like run out into the vineyard and ditch the Captain Brandy, Captain Brandy, who as we all remember

is the Brandy head that's on the pole. So they just like dipped it in there and then they come back and Tiffany apologizes to Brandy and then they decide that now that they're done with the wine tasting, they're going to go to a bar Which Deandra has booked out ahead of time. It's close to everyone. It's been sanitized So they now head off to do that But first they like have to go find Captain Brandy so they're like running around the vineyard being like where's Captain Brandy?

Fun and games, etc Well, when he knows the person's head I'd like to put on stick right now is Carrie So they go looking They go find it and Cameron's like they are not good detectives. Didn't they watch blues clues when they were young And Stephanie finds it and Stephanie's like well, I've never considered myself a hero And that stands today as well because I should have just left that bitch out there. I like the idea that if you watch Blue's Clues, you'd be like, um,

better equipped to find, uh, like a severed head in a vineyard. It would give you all the tools you would need. You know, what kind of six so is bad. I've never watched it. But I was like, hmm, maybe they should put this on Netflix. Netflix presents the Gritty Revailues. A blues clues. A blues clues.

So I watched all that dark shit on Netflix. I saw a meme the other day that said, my Netflix is terrifying. I was like, someone put their Netflix queue up there and it's like, girl murdered in France. You know, serial killer here. I was like, yeah, I'm with you girl. And Bridgerton.

And Bridgerton. I love it, watch Bridgerton. Yeah. I'm gonna go down that. My Netflix, my Netflix queue is Bridgerton and the Golden State Killer, night stocker, whatever. Yeah. So that's a little bit of post.

Mine's every murder show and bridge or chin. So then let's see, so they get on the bus and Carrie tells off Brandy's head on a stick, the other Brandy, she's like, listen, Brandy on a stick, I don't like you. Yeah, and Cameron's like, she gets me, Jeepers creepers. So let's head on over to AJ's online.

Yep, so now they're, that another at this bar and they, they have Captain Brandy there and they're playing with her and Cameron tells us, Captain Brandy is giving Deandra the wrong, or giving Brandy the, or giving Dianna the wrong look. It looks like she needs to go to insane up Salam. Is that the word? In sane, sane, sane Salam, Salam to Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Salam Um mental So like it Dandera is trying really really hard with this uh brandy thing. She just keeps it going and she's walking around

Oh my god, Brandy, but you want for your brandy? Get rid of that fucking thing that girl is killing to show that head on a stick So they go in and they take pickle pickle juice and fought gashats This would have been a great scene for Leon Lachon because Leon Lachon, if she's going to get rid of a head on a stick, she's going to get, it's going to stay rid of. Okay, like that thing would have been like broken in a half and stomped on the ground and that like like crushed by a teen Wheeler, like a dude by a Russian missile. And then when they ask her, why did you ruin it?

She said, you don't understand. In the carnival, we had a chop off people's heads and I had to chop off the head of my cousin, Dijora. Okay, okay. That bitch was just like my mama. Anyway, pickle shots. Pickle shots. So Brandy's like, I've had one of the worst years of my life.

And so far, I've had Jeff, you'll wind terrible dancing. Am I at on a stick? So that's have some fun. I really don't want to hear about how terrible Brandy's here is. You're not the victim here either. Brandy, okay. But the law we're lining people up to tell usy's here is. You're not the victim here either, Brandy. Okay. But the lazy Susan. Long wordlining people have to tell us to scream at them

that they're not fucking victims. Shut up, Brandy. But the lazy Susan of victimhood on this show is actually pretty amazing. I mean, it's like, it gets to a point where it's just, it's so ridiculous that you just have to just laugh and enjoy it all. Otherwise, either that or maybe I'd need to be committed

to an insane slum. So they twerk. Brandy gives him like twerking lessons and it's like, is this tweaking? No, Jen. So then Tiffany is like, my dancing is not good. And people are like, but you're a figure skater. And I'm like, yes, but that does not translate to being in the club and popping that booning. Like wait, can we rewind for a figure skater too? Like what has Jeffie not done? Okay. So H.A. himself comes out to learn how to tweak with them

and then later carries on the bar dancing. And Brandy has her little kids, little glitter person stuff. And then Jenna is asking Tiffany. She's like, did you change her name to Dr. Moon? She's like, I'm actually into, I tell you this. My name before Moon. Oh, wassup. Oh my god.

before moon oh was son oh my god that that of course was when I was the president of IBM I think you all remember that doctor dr. mt doctor son president of a bm no one that was me that was me so dandras um goes up to carry and say I'm mad at you right now. Okay. Cause we talk almost every day. And why didn't you tell me about your daughter? You're my friend. You should be able to tell me some like that. Nicole, you never give me just a talk. You never asked me what's going on with me.

You know, I'm done talking to you. Okay. I'm done talking to you, Diandra. So then Stephanie comes over to talk to Diandra. And she's like, um, so she's saying that you don't call her or she's like, oh, she's saying that I don't talk about her only myself. Yeah. Um, and then we see a montage of all the women's talking about how Deandra only talks about herself when she talks on the phone.

She always has a back problem or a foot problem or an aunt problem. Something's always going on and camera goes, Deandra forgets to ask her friends, what's going on with you? And maybe if she did, I could tell her. I got a new sparkle dog and it runs on the treadmill with me. Poop on a treadmill in case anybody's wondering. So Dandra's like, she's judging me for not fitting to her mold and I won't do it, someone else is gonna do. And if you don't want to be friends with me

And don't I know and she just walks away with that asking how Stephanie is which is so hilarious I'm about to step in and walks off So then Carrie goes on now Carrie starts really saying some bullshit. She's talking to Brandy and she's like She's being ridiculous not to host, okay? You have a house that someone bought you. You have all your businesses. Your mom is going to leave you this huge estate. I have nothing.

I don't have a house under my name. I'm like, you don't have nothing. You live in a mansion, you have a giant mansion in Mexico. You have everything you could need. And then she goes, Deandra doesn't know what it's like to not have money. I'm like, you are not homeless. I'm sorry.

She's her victim, her victim storyline is that she married a rich guy without a pre-map and now she has to stay married to him and can't take half of his money. I mean, come on, Gary, that is so gross on so many levels. She's such a gross person. It's actually funny at this point. Like, I don't even dislike Kerry anymore

because she's like so beyond gross that I'm learning to enjoy it. Yeah, like all her like, her hardship is predicated on Eduardo dumping her. So it's like it's like an inevitability that they're gonna get divorced. I guess she just sees it coming and she's like, I have nothing, I have nothing,

but my house down in Mexico, which is so nice that we actually built an entire vacation around it. Oh, but I have nothing. I mean, it's like, come on. Yeah, but she doesn't own it. That's her point. Remember last year, her whole story was trying to get Eduardo

to put a trust aside or something for her because she has a prenup. I mean, you can't marry a dude for his money and then be mad that you signed the prenup, you signed a prenup. I mean, you can't marry a dude for his money and then be mad that you sign the prenup, you sign the prenup. They will have, she'll get Alamoni, okay? If they break up, she'll get Alamoni and she can relax. She will be just fine.

And if she's so concerned, maybe she should take some classes at school. I don't know, like, maybe like look into starting with her. Make a fucking effort in your life, like the rest of us. How about that? Like go, like how many, yeah, it's like, listen, I'm not necessarily saying what's what's it called?

The boot strap, boot design, you pick yourself up by your boots, I'm not saying that. But like if you're seeing that things are gonna go bad at a certain point, like maybe you start investing in something so that way you have a, you have something to fall back on beside the sides. I mean, yeah, make an effort. Shake the world of like seriously. Yes. Jesus. Welcome to the rest of the world. Okay. So Randy's like, well, you know, but Dandruff doesn't really know what it's like to have a

family. You know, like she doesn't have that pressure. Like she doesn't know what it's like to have kids. I mean, just because you're gone doesn't mean that they're not, just because they leave doesn't mean they're not there. You know, you still take care of them and we all know that Mamadee is still taking care of Deandra. Mamadee is like, that is not true. Okay, Deandra here is a beep and here comes

some meatloaf open up the mouth. It's a special high of 47 recipe open up girl. So then Brandy it's like now Brandy fun. She there's like a mask behind the bar that has like a beard attached to a great beard so she like sticks in her pants so it looks like pubes and then break pubes and she goes out the street and tries to make hungry. It's just like the classic thing. Wacky brand, Wacky brand, you being hilarious. We got some pubo, humor and poop humor in one episode.

Congratulations. So then Tiffany is, she gets a text from her husband. She's like, he just says that he's putting the kids to bed. When she's really makes me feel guilty. And I'm not for my kids? Okay, I get this is your first season, but I'm gonna need something else. We're on episode five, okay?

Yeah. Run over somebody, get your vagina rejuvenated. I don't even care. I don't even care. I'm a trolley. I'm only 4 p.m. First of all, it's 4 p.m. Because you're being put down at 4 p.m. So there's that too. So let's just like

Like don't feel guilty. Be feel blessed feel blessed that you can like have a day of drinking So Brandy the pubes hanging out are from a mask that the bartender had with fake beard like a fake beard So she's got that in her crotch and he's like, oh, I'm gonna need my mask back. And they're like, oh God, please send us the dry cleaning bills, sir. Please, sorry about that. So then they go, she's mask was made

with a 100% duck dynasty hair. So I'm gonna need that back. So next they go to a gift shop. And Tandra's like, I love drunk shopping. I'm like, that's why your mother only allows you to have $200 in your account when you're out with the girls. Do you remember what happened to last time you went drunk shopping on this show? So yeah, so then they're like, they're in sort of like a Chachaki shop and they find,

Stephanie finds like a paddle and is like smacking Deandra with it and talk, and she starts talking about how when she gets drunk, she makes Travis her bitch and yada yada yada and they're like, oh my god, Jeremy must smack Deandra all the time because she feels nothing. And they're just like having fun, having this SNM moment. And so Stephanie decides to buy the paddle and then the guy's like, okay,

so I'm just gonna put your short kudary board in another bag. She's like, wait, it's just bored. It's just bored. It's like, wait, it's just bored. Tiffany's like, note to self, if staff ever serves me a meat and cheese platter, I'm not going to eat it. Yes. So then they're walking there outside. And Brandy's like, um, Dantra, you know, I think Carrie's like going

through a lot. And I think what she wants us to be like is like how are you doing, you know, cuz her girls are struggling and she Me and says oh, we talk all the time and you know what all I hear from her. It's my BPS I'm taking pics from my 50 and I'm showing my ass for my 50 years, but you're having problems And I suppose no it's your 50 years 50 is but you're having problems. It's just losing her fucking mind and brand is like well what you're saying now is what she thinks about you she thinks that you're all about yourself and and the ender's like well I only I will only do so much that I'm fucking done. And then she takes her vibes and we're like, yanks it down to be like, insane. But then she pulls it too far.

She's like, mother. So then they go to dinner and they have a private room for dinner. And it said two weeks earlier on the screen, and I was like, what? They must have been like, yeah, I think that maybe it was, maybe it was like left over. They probably were doing another edit, where like later on where they do a flashback to it. I don't know, maybe it was like leftover, they probably were doing another edit

where like later on where they do a flashback to it. I don't know, but it said two weeks earlier and I was like, unless, oh, no, I feel crazy. Maybe it was a little bit of an exiliar. Weird. I don't know. Pointing out the chirons everyone. What?

It was a chiroren error. So they go to this private room and this guy's like, we are so excited to have you guys. I hear there's so room, I said there's a birthday. Oh well it's not that someone's telling someone something, unlike my friend Carrie, my quote unquote friend, I guess she wouldn't tell me anything. And Tiffany's like, um, I'm like, I'm so hungry. I'll eat anything. Like I'll eat over a dead body guys. Like in a datamilab, I'd be like, hey, match, I'm hungry.

So I'm gonna eat because you know what? What would I eat in front of a dead body in a datamilab? Snacks, pants, pants, chicken, pad tie, turnip cake, smells like farts. I'm like, are you concerned about the smell of the turnip cake in front of a dead body? Hahaha. I think that, by the way, I think that Cameron must have been

like really exhausted at that point because it seems strange to me that Cameron didn't pipe up and say, that is so rude. I can't believe you eat food in front of a body. That's so rude. I can't believe you need food in front of a body. That's so rude. How could you do that to a body? So Jen's like, do you hold mind if I drink my Ovetools over a glass?

Better than going to jail, right? Thank you. Anybody want to ask me about my alcoholism because it's been five weeks. That would be really nice. I'm ready for my scene. I've been saving up the good stuff for a girl's trip. Okay, oh, okay.

A question from Tiffany. Why would you go on a jail? Because I was in alcohol. I just felt like I was just drinking too much. So I felt like I was something bad to happen. So I just quit. Okay, next question. Well, I'm really glad you figured that out.

Thank you. Me too. Anyone else? This is really good. This is good character development. I think it's gonna get me on the show. Okay, Deandra, any questions about my my drinking? I have a good hair. Okay, her's I have my own drug past. I was cocaine at it. I was a cocaine addict. My father committed suicide because he was not a college and I haven't talked to my family since then. I'm gonna have a family scene now

And really want to ask me about my family same now. I'm just like damn it Say well, man, anyone mind if I sit on this nice comfy chair. You're actually just sitting on Jen. Oh, it's fine Poor Jen is just like escorted out of the scene like you try try it, you try it. Thank you for your low level Bravo storyline, but Deandra had a Coke issue when to rehab her father commits suicide and is estranged from her family because of well issues. Okay, fine Jeff. Please go through some more trauma

so that we can try you again next year. Okay, get out. You're walking home. So that Deandra tries to cry, but she's had so much boat trucks. It won't leave like an inch of her face moves. And it is the funniest fucking thing. I love a good boat-tock's cry.

So Tiffany's like, she's like, what's wrong with cute. She's like, well, I was telling her. And I don't know her name. I don't really care. The ginger over here. I don't know if anybody heard, but you know what? I have a step-brother, and we wereanged and I wrote a letter and then I dropped it off and I said I'd like a relationship with you.

Oh, you know what this means? The ball is in his court, okay? Both people need to try to be a hostess. You know what this he chill his vodka shots. I mean his tequila shots. Asking me if he chill his tequila, okay? That's what I wanna know. Did he put out the good cheese bread? That's what I wanna know.

Did he put out the good cheese bread? Okay, you should be friends with him. You could learn how to be a hostess from him. So she's like, It's the same thing with us. I mean, you told me that you needed me to call you more and buy you more and I did all those things you asked me to do and it really hurts my feelings.

Now you think I'm not a good friend? Just because I left you with the gray hand bus stop, while I took the car with all my drunk and purchases And the drunk show goods away Doesn't mean I'm a bad friend Oh, but we have different feelings about that You like warmth tequila I like warmth tequila

And different things like these women I think like children And if I have to hang out with children I'd rather hang out with my own children Well, you have a certain cake for your birthday. You know why? You know why, Carrie? Because I asked your daughter what you'd like

for your birthday as your cake, because I'm a good friend. So she... Listen, I don't really know what's going on with your family. Oh, I care about what's going on with your taste buds. Now, what kind of cake do you like? Oh, what a great friend she is, asking Sophia what cake I like.

Let me get you a better Deandra. By the way, the birthday cake is... Oh, that birthday cake shows up. Yeah. The guy is like, happy birthday. Did we ever get to see the donut shop in grapevine that Deandra likes? because I felt like that would we were kind of like set up for that and it never paid off. Oh yeah, that's true.

We never got to see grapevine donuts. So Brandy's like, well, I always felt like my birthday was a burden. So this was perfect because everyone made it about themselves. Cheers. So now we're back in Dallas and Brandy is doing a bubble bath with her kids and Cameron is on the treadmill again. Excuse me. And she has fancy on the next treadmill over and of course fancy poops on the treadmill. And she's like, why does fancy always poop on the treadmill? I'm like, well, maybe fancy is terrifying.

Maybe this is torture. I'm not kidding. How does she poop on the treadmill? So Carrie is at home and her daughter Sophia comes in and I love that all of Carrie's kids clearly hate Carrie. Like they hate her guys. They despise her. They do so funny.

Well, because she also like traps them. She like finds ways to trap them at that house. She's like, come back from Los Angeles. You don't need to be in school anymore. Really sad. You got to really stay at all houses or clothes right now. Work for me, your mother.

Ah. So now Sophia is, she graduated from college and then she's gonna do real estate. But with COVID, she can't really do it. So she's now doing social media for Carey's jewelry Yeah I'm carries like did you bring the things how was your weekend honey? I'm like mmm good. Okay what's going on with the situation with the bag? I found some bags. Oh very good because I'll pay up to a dollar you know so let's talk you know okay so you know before Corona you know I was

achieving financial independence and I made a hundred thousand dollars But now no, but I got four hundred dollars with your post so okay anyway, I'll tell you about the girls The daughter is her and she's like we said okay So we went for this party with the girls and then for me to comment that I'm the only one with a That she's the only one with the viable business and she's like, well, that's not nice. Oh, I'm shocked that she said that I'm shocked my business is struggling. It's upsetting that was a lot more than Well, I mean it is a low blow, but at the same time Is it wrong? I mean like if you're if if, if, if Carrie, like, if Carrie is concerned

that she can't live off of her business, then maybe it's not a viable business right now. I don't know. I mean, well, it still is mean, but I'm just, I'm just trying to, I'm just trying to poke holes in Gary's logic just because she's annoying me. Well, it's a low blow, but you told her she's never earned anything on, on her own and everything's just been handed to. It's like, you're, it's a low blow, but you told her she's never earned anything on her own and everything's just been handed to her. It's like, come on. You're saying something's a low blow.

So Carrie is like, yes. And then I kind of snapped and I said, you don't know what's going on through my daughter has depression. And then it hit me because I was talking to Olivia. And she said, maybe you need a Sophie if she's fine because you know you always say you're fine and she's like um yeah I'm definitely one of those people who likes to deal with things on my own and not on camera for your stupid-ass TV show about rubber face old ladies

being mean to each other for no reason so leave me out of this thanks. Exactly and I I did notice that when Carrie told Sophia about what she let slip, she kind of judged it a little bit. She was like, well, I let it out. I snapped and I admitted I have a daughter with depression. I'm like, no, you didn't just say that you have a daughter. You worry that your daughter has depression. You outed the fact that she was suicidal, and that may not have been something

that she wanted to be outed to the woman in that way. And your make-its, I'm like, you didn't do that. Yeah, she's totally exploiting her kids for this show, and it's gross. And so she's like, well, Olivia told me, you know, that you had a really hard time in the divorce, and I guess I've never had a chance to ask you, did you have the hardest time in the divorce?

Okay. So you've never asked your kid how your divorce affected her. Years later. Now you're waiting to use it as a thing, as a scene for your show. You're gross. Or how about the fact that she just got mad at Deandra for never asking how she is. One here, it's like years later and she's like, by the way, so that all divorcing. That hurt you. It's like years later and she's like, by the way, so that'll divorce thing. That hurt you?

It's like, maybe she learned, maybe she learned from the fight, you know? So, so if he has like, I don't want to talk about it. I don't want to talk about it. I don't want to talk about it. Well, you never want to talk about it. If you went through a hard time and I didn't know, I just want to say I'm sorry. She's like, yeah, mom, I'm, please, go away. Go away right now.

Yeah, she's like, but I want to fix it now, because I was abandoned by my parents when they got divorced. And I'm here for you. And she goes, could we stop talking about our relationship? Thanks. I was like, wow, this is performative from other head, like only your real housewives can be too. Yeah.

So now we go to Tiffany with her daughters and they're like doing math and of course they're really good at it and she's like looking over there homework and everything and she starts talking to us about being a tiger mom and how when she was growing up, she wasn't allowed to go to sleep until her homework was done and correct and one time her dad made her,

they have to 1am until she got it just right. Um, so, uh, so she's, you know, she's focused. So then, uh, so then Tiffany, after she's done with her kids, she goes into the bedroom with her husband and she's like, I mean, Zostan right now. Which makes sense since she's a doctor and on a reality TV show and raising two children. Yeah, it's just another basically scene of Tiffany like, oh my God, do I wanna work or be home with the cans? And the husband's like, babe, I don't care what you do.

Okay, I'm rich as fuck. Okay. Yeah, please. The Dallas resident, I'd licked her up because I heard people talking about what he does because they're super rich. Let's see, her husband, product of extreme tiger parents, that's her Tiffany's family. The Dallas resident is married to Daniel Moon, vice president, and general counsel for jewelry and accessory brand Sam Moon, which apparently is some huge thing. So he's basically like, who care?

Like jewelry. I get it. You don't have to work. Yeah, there's big, some big jewelry company. Well, that might, I wonder if there's some resentment there from Kerry, you know, maybe I have to work so hard. So that yeah, Tiffany is like, um, imagine your whole life, you've wanted to climb this mountain and he works so hard to get up to his mountain and he gets to the top of the mountain and you look around and you said, why did I climb this mountain again? I'm like, yeah, that's called mountain climbing. And then, you know, I guess what you do, you climb another mountain. You go down, you have, you have some hot chocolate and then you find another mountain. You go down, you have, you have some hot chocolate, and then you find another mountain to climb.

Okay. That's how it works. You can't, you know, that song climb every mountain. You can't climb every mountain if you just stop at the top of one. It's not climb one mountain. It doesn't make sense. The ball. Yeah.

That's okay. Tiffany, you can climb the mountain, you climb it, now climb down it, and then like get your hot cocoa in the lodge, just running, get the cocoa. Yeah, or once you've climbed a couple, you'll probably be rich enough that you could just helicopter through the next mountain. So you don't ever have to climb again cause climbing steep it, okay?

Or explore different terrain. Maybe don't climb, swim, maybe swim in ocean. Swim, go to a beach. Like just hang out in your yard. Like you don't have to do that. Yeah. So she talks about, she talks about the pressure of having parents who expect so much and she's never able to please her mom and stuff and he's like, yeah, you know, your dad always lecturing you about how he was such a big deal in China and he gave it all up for you and she's like, yeah, and She feels like she's constantly repaying them and he's like, but what could you do? You're like the perfect Asian child, babe and I believe in you. So you know, it's ultimately a cutesy because her husband's like, do whatever the fuck you want. What do I care?

Yeah, exactly. She just, you know, she just is burdened with expectations from her parents knowing that like if she does something like a little indulgent, her parents will be like, what the fuck? That's really what I succumbed down to. So yeah, so that's cool. I love Tiffany. Love. She's such a good addition. Love this show too. I'm really enjoying it. In case anyone cared, that's where I'm at. And I love you to Ronnie. You're my favorite.

I love you being. So tomorrow we are going to be recapping the season finale of Salt Lake City. It's super size. I don't know if that means it's hour 15 or 90 minutes, but it's super sized. So I love that. I can't wait to see how it all pans up! And until then, everyone stays safe and have a great day and we'll talk to you on the next episode. Bye! Bye! Watch what crap ends with like to think it's premium sponsors!

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